#the only opinion about myself that matters is my own and unfortunately it's not ao good

[foxantoine]

been rambling on my priv twitter about my general body/face image issues BUT DAMN... it really nothing compared to my personality issues like i wish i cared about how i look... i wish it was thee problem... unfortunately looks don't matter at all if the heart is unyielding

[princesssarcastia]

Thoughts on Star Trek AOS? (And do you think Kirk was on Tarsus?)

i have SO MANY THOUGHTS about star trek aos, so buckle up.  brace yourself.

star trek aos is a terrible disaster and i love it SO MUCH.  for me, star trek 2009 is still in that class of unreasonably pleasing movies like the mummy or stardust or jumanji: welcome to the jungle.  what they are isn’t exactly top notch but you love them for being exactly what they are.

star trek aos is a star-studded fucking phenomenal cast of some of the best actors working today, which makes up for the very inconsistent writing and unfortunate low-level current of sexism.

literally where would i be today if chris pine could not make faces Like That. i honestly couldn’t tell you.

overall, I have quite a few bones to pick with JJ Abrams for setting up a star trek universe that is less Wacky Space Utopia adventures with liberal political commentary ranging from unsubtle to im-hitting-you-over-the-head-with-my-opinions-like-they’re-a-brick—

to this kind of overtly militarized action-hero adventure porn where one white man saves the universe from Scary People Who Don’t Look Like Us And Are Crazy.  I also don’t appreciate what they did to Jim Kirk, turning him into this womanizing self-centered bastard who has to be in charge.  I REALLY don’t appreciate the casual misogyny, what with the last of rank stripes for women and the gratuitous sex-ed up scenes and the way that Amanda Grayson gets fridged for man-pain and and and— you get the picture.

Or at least, that’s what they tried to do to jim kirk.  and god fucking bless chris pine for being able to make facial expressions, because i firmly believe if pretty much almost anyone else had played Jim Kirk as written by JJ Abrams, that’s exactly what he would have been.

But because of chris pine’s acting, instead, most of the AOS fandom and I realized/decided that this “womanizing” version of jim kirk actually really really hates himself so much, most likely for trauma reasons. 

we took that shit and ran with it and never really stopped.

zachary quinto is also like god tier casting.  unfortunately the writers for the first two movies mostly gave him Anger as a primary motivator, which like, is not exactly how I would interpret Spock at all, but quinto played this Angry Spock so so well.

ZOE SALDANA PLAYS THE LIGHT OF MY LIFE, NYOTA UHURA, PERFECTLY AND THAT’S ALL I’LL HEAR ON THE MATTER.

john cho should be cast in everything ever he’s amazing and I love seeing him.  this man has the range. hikaru sulu is the backbone of this fucking ship.  this man wins the big damn hero award every single movie. 

i still miss living in the same world as anton yelchin. i really, really do.

I also have found family feelings all over these movies, where these baby versions of iconic characters from the sixties are brought together too early to witness too much fucking trauma.  harry potter references aren’t exactly in vogue right now, but there’s this one piece from a—well, actually, its a harry potter reference in an mcu fic i read years ago, now that i think about it, but anyway:

it was something like, there are some things you can’t go through with a person—like that mountain troll in harry potter—without becoming friends for life.  there are some crucibles that will bind you together forever.  and awful as it is, I think Nero and the Vulcan genocide were the AOS crew’s mountain troll.  there’s no going back or separating, after that.

also I feel like there’s a ton of competence porn in this trilogy that i deeply, deeply enjoy.

star trek: 2009 and into darkness are both grimdark male power fantasy bullshit that only accidentally hits all the right buttons for me.  I love them dearly but i know EXACTLY what they are, thank you.

star trek: beyond is a delightful movie with no real plot where our favorite crew are finally Adults With A Modicum Of Common Sense And Stability, instead of Disaster Children Angsting All Over The Place, and they get to save the universe with the power of excellent rock music and friendship. how cool is that?!?  i wanna give simon pegg a high five for making this movie.

on a more meta note, what I find kind of satisfying about these movies is that—for all his many faults that i’m always happy to expound upon—JJ Abrams actually went for it.  He Did That.  He just made his own brand new timeline, killed jim kirk’s dad, then gave him an abusive uncle/step-dad, then literally destroyed one of the founding planets of the Federation, then he, in an iconic fashion, switched Jim and Spock’s places in the infamous “wrath of khan” death scene, so instead Spock gets to watch Jim die. 

and you know what? I can forgive a lot of bullshit for that kind of poetic angsty fanfic plot detail. 

every time uhura says, “an alternate reality,” in star trek 2009 just gives me chills.  every time she says it, you feel the weight of sixty years of history and legacy sitting on these people’s shoulders, the weight of arguably one of the most popular TV shows of all time.

imagine, living in a new world you’re aware isn’t the one that was supposed to be.  imagine that!

oh! and on the question of tarsus:

what I think is probably true irl: JJ Abrams has never thought that far ahead in his life.  correct me if i’m wrong, but hadn’t he.....not even watched star trek.........when he made these movies............like lol i’d bet you this man didn’t even really know Tarsus was a thing.  And even if he did, I don’t think he thought it was part of the new canon he was creating.  AOS is much more self-contained than the serialized universe the original star trek was, so I don’t think that AOS was intended to encompass all those things, like tarsus, that we as a fandom like to obsess over.

what I personally enjoy: i love me some AOS fic that explores the ridiculous amounts of trauma that comes from living through a genocide.  I think that, given we all decided AOS Jim Kirk hates himself, and engages in a shit ton of self-sabotaging and destructive behavior to cope, it’s a reasonable jump to think that at least some of that comes from some survivor’s guilt bullshit from Tarsus.  And honestly, hit me up if you want recs for this, because boy do I have them.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: no one does angst quite like AOS!Jim Kirk.

what I believe wholeheartedly: this is like Schrödinger's Plot Point, okay, it both exists and doesn’t exist simultaneously.  it’s easy to read tarsus into some of jim’s behavior, and it’s easy to read none of it in, and both of those choices are valid.  go with your gut, go with what makes you happy, go with what you think makes sense.  This is where fandom lives, in these little details that fall through the cracks.

anyway WOW did I talk a lot.  those are at least some of my star trek thoughts.  i do have others, but i’ve expounded on them before on this blog, and y’all don’t need me to repeat myself

ask me my thoughts on ______

[crypticcravings]

Goodnight Kiss

It is day 7 of Adrinette Month, and I feel like I have not incorporated enough of the other sides of the love square. Fortunately, Day 7 is Patrol! So I have written some gratuitous LadyNoir for your reading pleasure. There is very little plot in this one. Enjoy!

Also available on AO3

Named for Goodnight Kiss by Jung Hyoseong 

Two weeks later and Adrien could not keep his hands to himself. 

It had been two weeks since their first kiss. Ever since, Adrien found himself addicted to Marinette's lips. It was nonstop. When they studied, when they were on dates, even on patrol. 

The last of which could actually prove to be a problem if he couldn't get himself under control. Unfortunately, not even the threat of an Akuma or Hawkmoth could keep him off of her.

"Chaton, we should be working," Ladybug protested feebly as Cat Noir kissed her neck. He was working his way up to her lips, she knew it. 

"Hmm, the city will be alright on its own for a bit," Cat purred.

"Alley Cat…" Even as she complained, her words lacked heat and she pulled Cat Noir closer. 

She couldn't help but admire how her partner was filling out. The lights of the Eiffel Tower highlighted his muscle definition perfectly. A combination of working out, fencing, and sparring had done him well over the past couple of years. Not to mention the intense work out that came from battling akuma.

Before she could complain again, or try to weakly push him away, Cat Noir found his way to her lips. 

Ladybug rolled her eyes and let herself become overwhelmed by his kisses. It looked like they wouldn't be patrolling that night, and if Ladybug was being perfectly honest, she wasn't too upset by that. She couldn't understand why they waited so long to start doing this. Now that they had started, she felt they had wasted a great deal of time not kissing, and she was pleased to make up for the lost time. 

Ladybug felt a low sound rise in the back of her throat. She felt her partner grin against her lips in response. 

Silly cat was pleased as could be. He clearly knew the effect he had on her. Fortunately, she was also aware of the effect she had on him.  

Ladybug pushed Cat Noir until his back hit the steel bars of the Tower. She ran a gloved hand through his tousled blonde locks. Adrien was always put together, clean cut, and soft edges. Cat Noir, on the other hand, was wild, and undeniably sexy. The fact that this boy, with his wild side and his soft side, was all hers was exhilarating.

Ladybug kissed him long and hard before pulling away, leaving both of them gasping for air. Cat Noir's eyes were glazed over, and his face was flushed. She was sure that she wasn't in much better shape. Cat Noir slid down the bar until he was sitting, and Ladybug followed suit. She tucked herself into his side, and he kissed her on the forehead, then the nose, and another peck on the lips. Then another, and another. 

"If we keep this up, we're never going to patrol," Ladybug pointed out between kisses. 

"I think it's already a bit late for that, My Lady," Cat kissed her once again. "Besides, I can't seem to stop myself."

"Well, if it's just this once, I guess it's okay," Ladybug conceded. 

They spend the remainder of their scheduled patrol time in each other's arms, then stayed out a little longer. 

They only stopped kissing when their lips were swollen and tender to the touch.  

"Speak for yourself, Bug," Cat replied, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck, then stretching lazily. "I could keep kissing you furever if you'd let me." He winked at her. 

Ladybug couldn't help her flush. "We didn't even get any patrolling done tonight."

"It's been a quiet night. We can make up for it with an extra patrol tomorrow night, if it would make you feel better."

Their patrols were a formality more than anything. Normally, Ladybug and Cat Noir would go out three times a week, rarely twice in a row. They had started out as an excuse for two fourteen year olds to get out of the house, get used to their abilities, and meet up with their friend/partner. Later they had turned into a quick run around the city, punctuated by practice sparring. Now, it seemed, they were becoming a lover's tryst. 

Ladybug didn't particularly mind spending the time necking with her partner, but if they didn't want it to become the latest headlines, they would need to set up ground rules. Fortunately, Cat Noir was of the same opinion. 

"My father and Nathalie will be suspicious if I walk around with hickies and bruised lips when supposedly I hadn't even seen you that evening," he joked. 

"My parents will, too. Especially if I keep going missing for hours on end." 

While their normal patrol generally took about an hour, all of the kissing had turned that hour into three. Cat Noir sat on his heels and faced Ladybug. 

"So, time limit. We should keep to our normal time on patrol," Cat started the list, holding up one finger.

"Second, we need to keep any PDA out of the press," at Ladybug's suggestion, Cat Noir lifted another finger. "As much as Alya would love to hear about her ship sailing, the public needs to know that we can maintain a professional image."

"Furred," Cat lifted his third finger and Ladybug rolled her eyes good naturedly, "and I hate to say it, because you know how I love your kisses, Bugaboo, but we need to cap the kissing."

"You're right. No making out. Although, I do motion that we make an exception for a goodnight kiss."

"A goodnight kiss," Cat Noir folded one arm over his chest, and held a hand over his mouth, as if he were pondering the notion, "I could be purrsuaded to accept those terms."

Ladybug rose to her knees to be at his eye level. "What will it take for me to purrsuade you, Chaton?" She asked the question with a good idea of the answer already. 

He grinned in his usual, mischievous manner. "We have to seal the deal with one last kiss."

Ladybug smirked. "I surely hope it isn't our last kiss."

"Well, our last kiss on patrol. For tonight. Until we officially say goodnight, at least."

"I suppose I can give you one last kiss, then."

Cat Noir gave her one of his signature grins, biting his bottom lip. It was the same grin he gave her every time he knew he was about to get his way.  He looked like a kid when he got excited like that, and it made her love him even more for it. 

Ladybug placed her hands on his cheeks, and Cat Noir, stilll kneeling, wrapped his arms around her waist. He pulled her in closer. 

Ladybug pressed her lips to Cat Noir's and let him take over. The kiss was slow, almost lazy, like they were savoring every moment. 

They could kiss one another at any time, but there was something about kissing in the mask that made it that much more special. 

After their "last kiss" they decided to call it a night, since clearly no patrolling was actually going to happen. 

The two checked that the coast was clear before dropping down to Marinette's balcony. Ladybug released her transformation once it was clear that they were in private. 

Tikki phased through the trap door to grab a snack, and to give them some privacy. 

"Well, it's been fun, Princess," Cat said, making as though to take off into the night. "We should do it again sometime."

Marinette grabbed his tail before he was able to get away from her. She smirked at him. "Aren't you forgetting something, Chaton?"

"Forgetting something?" He threw her a sly smile over his shoulder. "Whatever could you mean, Mari?"

She gave him a deadpan look, stuck a hand on her hip, and popped it out to the side.

Cat Noir dropped down from the ledge and prowled around her. Marinette shivered at the look in his eyes, like was a predator and she was his prey. 

"What could I possibly be forgetting," her cat purred, "I can't remember. You'll have to remind me."

He ran a gloved hand over Marinette's bare arm, leaving goosebumps in his path.

"Oh, you've forgotten our deal already?" 

Marinette spun on her heel to face her partner. She booped him on the nose with the tip of her forefinger. "If that's the case, I should get inside. I have class early tomorrow, and need a good night's sleep if I don't want to be late." She slipped around him and meandered towards the trap door. "It's too bad I can't give you a proper goodbye, you being Paris's greatest hero and all."

At that comment, Marinette felt an arm wrap around her waist. She was pulled back against a firm wall of muscle, and she chuckled.

"Do you have something to say to me, Chaton?"

He responded with a low purr in her ear and a peck at the base of her neck. "I'm just looking for my official goodnight from My Lady. " 

Marinette smiled and leaned back into his touch for a moment, before turning to face him, and looping her arms around his neck. "I think that can be arranged."

They nuzzled noses together, and Cat Noir matched Marinette's smile just as their lips met. 

They shared a sweet good night kiss as the sun finally set over the horizon. When finally they separated, Cat Noir kissed her one last time on the tip of her nose. "Goodnight, Princess."

"Goodnight, mon minou."

Marinette waved him off as he lept off the side of the building. She retreated into her bedroom and flopped down on her bed, shoving her reddened face into her pillow.

She couldn't keep the lovesick grin off of her face. She had a feeling no matter how many times he kissed her, she would always get this giddy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

[lowaharts]

sorry for the slow responses!

it’s been a rough few weeks for me and I’ve been getting lazy at answering asks so they started piling up a.lkgjalkgj Responses are under the cut to save you guys the walls of text! 

Anonymous said: Okay but instead of an arm or an eye, Lance loses a leg? And Shiro gets a flashback to when he injured Matt's leg at the arena but this time, instead of a really bad injury, a whole leg is gone; and now Shiro's instantly at Lance's side and then Lance passes out from the blood loss and Shiro accidentally calls Lance "Matt". Like he would probably be all, "Matt! Stay with me! MATT!!!"

suddenly this AU has a hint of Shatt I LIKE IT-- but omg pls save lance his limbs i beg of u

grelhou said: hi, i know you might get this a lot, but your art is exquisite!!! i mean, do you know that one post that says "PICASSO WHO!!! EAT UR HEART OUT MICHAELANGELO !!!" and similar things representing your reactions everytime your mutuals draw anything? that's actually me everytime i see literally everything you draw!!! it's just so AMAZING, i can't even describe it in words! sorry for my english, but i needed to let you know this! have a nice day :D

Ehhh ahhh thank you so much ;alkjg;adlgj Honestly i’ve never heard of such a post but thanks o)-< And your english is perfect no worries! 

Anonymous said: Personally - with regards to who bottoms in Klance - I've seen it go 50/50 in fanfiction so I never quite understand whenever I see people complain about never seeing one or the other because there's plenty if you know how to look for it. Then again I also read an ungodly amount of fanfic...

I think in terms of fanfics yeah i see it go 50/50 but in comparison i only read like a handful of fics because i read real slow so... i wouldn’t know 😂  I don’t think i see a lot of Lance/Keith artwork though, but then again i never really go out of my way to look for it. 

Anonymous said: I know that you like bottom!Lance but what are your feelings on Bottom!Keith? Like can you read fanfiction with Bottom!Keith or you really not like it that much? I myself like both but I was curious about your opinion.

I’ve read lots of fanfics with bottom Keith! Tbh i don’t think i came across a rendition of keith bottoming that i didn’t like but sometimes i get wary of either of them getting too ooc or something... But in terms of who bottoms and tops in a relationship standpoint i like both! I like to imagine them do stupid things to determine who goes first like make bets and shit. 

Anonymous said: Lance is blue, blue in the near time is ao no exorcist kyoto arc. So do you watch or read AnE? if yes, who's your fav character (s)?

YES i used to love LOVE ao no ex around the time when the first series came out. I read the manga up to a point before i lost my place but i’m really looking forward to seeing the kyoto arc animated o)-< My favorites are Rin and Shima! I loved Shima before [spoiler] but after [spoiler] i’m just o<-< I guess i really do love the asshole types. 

Anonymous said: Have you heard of the Voltron Big Bang? I'm just curious whether you're interested in joining because I love seeing your art!

Oh yes i have! i think someone linked to me before but... unfortunately i have personal project i want to work on so i won’t have time for it. 

Anonymous said: *screaming to the galazy and beyond* second seasoooon!!! (I definitely did not pause and thinks a lot of time why there're two shirtless people in the trailer)

s2 is already out and oh boy i have some thoughts 

yuujinjou said: Omg everyone looks so great in hanbok ₍₍ (̨̡ ‾᷄♡‾᷅ )̧̢ ₎₎✨✨✨✨. Happy New Year to you too

THANK YOU!! 

Anonymous said: OMG I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH!!! YOUR HANBOK VOLTRON MAKES THIS KOREAN CHILD HAPPY!!! 사랑해요~

AHHHH YOU’RE WELCOME!! I’m happy to make a fellow korean happy with my hanbok art/////// 

Anonymous said: HI! I'm the anon asking about Shay and Nyma. Anyways, about Shay, I can possibly see her in the medical team as well! And about Nyma and Roco, pilots would be a nice fit for them! Would they be working along Voltron if that's the case? Like flying the team to their destinations?

Hey there again!! Shay in the medic team or search and rescue would be best i think :) but in that case she probably wouldn’t be working that closely with team Voltron. Nyma and Rolo tho yes! They would be in charge of transporting teams to their mission locations-- if it calls for it. 

Anonymous said: Hi! I would like to say that ur art is super gorgeous. I found ur blog b/c of Voltron (*fangirls*) and I love all of ur art and style and I could go on but I am not trying to take up ur time. Um, I have two questions: I am a person who loves drawing but I am not talented. I am very u taleneted and I feel so discouraged b/c why on Earth am I drawing if I am sucky at it... help? 1/2 - 2/2 The other thing(plz don't kill me)... I don't romantically ship anyone in Voltron(yet) and I feel like all shippers and fans would have my head if I feel like that and it makes me almost afraid of the Voltron fandom(but I love this show>_<) so... help? Ik my questions are dumb; I am sorry. Happier note: THANKS FOR SHARING UR AMAZINF SKILLS WITH THE WORLD!╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

Hi anon!! Thank you so much T T To be frank, i think your desire to draw should be fueled by how much enjoyment you get out of drawing. And if you feel that you need to improve, then always keep practicing! I don’t think it’s possible to get worse just by practicing, so there’s only one direction you can go.  LOL hey to each their own. I think first and foremost people should enjoy Voltron for its story and characters, because that’s all that really matters. Shipping and fandom stuff can come later. I don’t know why anyone would hate you for not shipping anyone? I doubt anyone cares. Pats you though THANK YOU 

Anonymous said: Hey!! I think your art is absolutely gorgeous; I aspire to draw like u one day. May I use ur art as profile pic or/and wallpaper?

Thank you so much! Keep drawing anon! :D And sure of course! Credit to my blog would be highly appreciated

Anonymous said: I always thought being the bottom was cool (way cuter and they get to control the top ) haven't people heard of power bottoms before? Lance is a power bottom if you ask me, he bottoms but dam son he's still cool and in charge XP

to tell you the truth i haven’t read a lot of good power bottom fics ever... in my life.. LMAO but yes power bottoms are great :) 

Anonymous said: I've been trying to find your Twitter, and I'm having issues. So quick question, what's your Twitter?

it’s @lowarghh

Anonymous said: SEEEEEEEEAAAAAAASOOOOOOON 2 IT'S LIT I'M SO HYPED UP FOR THIS

I HAVE A LOT TO SAY ABOUT SEASON 2 FRUGHRUGHRUGH BREATHES FIRE TO SAVE MY BREATH 

[ts-nightingaleislands]

Episode #4- “if I have to do another tribal I'm gonna tonya Harding these bitches”- Austin

I have not gotten a chance to see tribal's entirety, but something did stand out. Tawni essentially implied that OG Thrush would stick together and do what it takes and it told me that perhaps there are people on that tribe unwilling to work with Petrel. I understand that we have our OG tribe but I will say that people who arent open to working with others may not be good for the long run so I think Im gonna try and evaluate a few things and go from there as far as maximizing my benefits

The Dylan blindside went very well. I would have very much preferred to see Tawni leave, only because she's still the person I've talked to least. Unfortunately, Cheatham and Austin both wanted her to stay, which is why we voted Dylan, who was a much more aggressive player than Amy. I figure that it's early on, a swap could come any day now, so I've been preparing for one. I've already tried to get a Tawni vote prepared in the event we lose, which was actually very easy because she told me she wanted to get rid of Noah and that's all he needed to be good with it. (It also helps that he was independently considering voting Tawni before I told him that). Cheatham and Austin would likely prefer to vote Amy, which I would not prefer. Amy is much less likely to betray me than Tawni as far as I can tell, and the absolute worst case scenario regarding a swap would make Amy an easy scapegoat vote if we lose. Tawni would be much harder to vote out in that scenario. Premerge is all about making strong connections to carry me through the rest of the game, just laying my foundation now. Austin and Noah both trust me so much, and then Cheatham appears to be seen as a fourth wheel to our alliance. Austin and Noah (especially Noah) are huge players, so if you're going to take a shot at my alliance, it would make more sense to get one of them, and Cheatham has already been seen to get votes on him due to certain aspects of how he comes off (blatantly refusing to work with people afaik?). I'm not the big guy in my alliance, but I'm not the expendable guy either. Right where I'd want to be. Assuming I can actually form strong social connections with everyone, and let's be honest, that's 50/50. Oh no do I need to take control of the game strategically to have a shot at winning?? Well if I do, the bigmovez part of my brain will have to wait until we merged, because I have already established that the premerge is a time for fostering strong connections!

Well that went according to plan and Dylan went home! Now it’s once i get tawni out (who was also against me) , i’ll get my idol! That really all i care about tbh so i have some safety come swap. Noah and I are THROWING this comp just to send home tawni and get ourselves an IDOL

So I have to pretty much start a majority alliance later though right now I am more focused on the challenge. As of this moment, I like the idea sharing going around for the challenge. Baby Got Back may be questionable to some but we just want to have fun! Im ready to get this going and just have a fun challenge with hopefully another win!

Im nervous sorta in that last time I had to edit the music video and it was ao stressful knowing if we lost it would be my fault. It does sorta deem AnnMarie is running into trouble so I might have to do it again unfortunately and its like ahhh

Pleaseeeeee have a tribe swap soon . I love my tribe but if I have to do another tribal I'm gonna tonya Harding these bitches .

Last night felt like a mess. Rizo joins a chat with Kyle and Tim supposedly to get info from and the belief is they may want to target one of us, meanwhile Gwen makes a chat with me and Sara calling it Detectives where we end up voicing concerns and sure enough Rizo and Tim's history is brought up. The girls and AnnMarie get sketched out from Tim and by association Kyle, Steven meanwhile is gaining cool points like Santa Claus and yeah. Im pretty certain its only a matter of time before peoppe search stuff about me but man this tribe is becoming a secret ball of chaos

And Liam is an unproblematic cool kid too

Well. I cried myself to sleep. And I woke up crying. I want to give up so bad. Cause it’s like at this point I have zero chance of winning so what’s the point. I don’t know anyone on the other side. My one ally in the game sucks ass. Granted my entire tribe does. And it’s like I’m assuming at this point we aren’t swapping and y’all are gonna keep us here until merge except there will be no one from my tribe left to merge. I’m just so fucking tired of trying

Wow, I can’t believe we won again. And in a landslide. It was a lot of fun making that video. And yes, that is a real snake. And no, I had never touched a snake before. And yes, it was weird. Okay, so here’s what went down over the past few days. Rizo told the CORGIS that Tim wanted to make an alliance with him and Kyle. I don’t know if that actually came to fruition yet, but after doing some digging, Chris found out that both Kyle and Rizo work for FedEx. Even though they live in different states, they may have bonded over this, or maybe they met at some point? No idea. Anyway, we are keeping our eyes out. This prompted Chris, Sara, and I to make a new sub-alliance called Detectives. We discussed the possibility of Rizo going rogue and we also discussed concerns about Tim. I did some research online and found Rizo’s Survivor audition video on Youtube. I think he may be a little more of a game player than we initially thought, but I mean, a lot of people in these ORGs apply for the actual shows. But it did make me and Sara question our Sunt alliance with him. I also did some digging on Tim and found out that he has played in a lot of ORGs and he has won, or done well, in a significant number of them. Reading reviews from his past competitors makes me even more nervous about him. They said that he was really great at game play and basically slayed the social game. He is way too much of a threat and we need him out of this game before he can manipulate people. And this makes sense with Tim’s Devils…I realized that he could have just told the whole tribe about the concerns with Noah, but he decided to just tell the girls. Now, sure, maybe this was out of the kindness of his heart, but based on the information that I found, I think that it was a strategic move to gain trust with us. Oh, and also, I accidentally almost blew up that alliance…we were talking about alliances and he said he was only in one alliance. However, I know that he has approached at least two other people with the possibilities of alliances, so I highly doubt that is true. Anyway, I mentioned it in the Detectives and Chris was like oh he has an alliance? But Sara and I saved it (I hope) by telling him that he was probably talking about the chat he made with the girls since the hosts technically had to call that an alliance. I think we’re good? I’m debating whether we tell Chris the name. Tim’s Devils is a total joke and none of the girls are actually loyal to it, but I don’t want the name coming back to Chris. He is still my #1 and I want him to be able to trust me. It was funny because when I was talking to Tim, he said we have a good alliance and I was like Tim’s Devils? And he asked how many alliances I was in. I was like ohhh I didn’t realize that was a real alliance because no one has talked in it. Then tried to cover it up with asking whether it is normal for people to make alliances before losing a challenge. Who knows if he bought it. I’m just going to keep playing up the N00B card for now. So everyone that I have talked to has said they are concerned about Tim. He is my target. So this could go two ways – either everyone really wants Tim out, or they really want me out and that’s the name they are giving me. I hope it’s the former, but either way it has been fun! If it is the latter, it was a great learning experience! It’s kind of hard to say what the next move is, since we don’t know if there will be a swap…and if there is a swap, who would be on my tribe. Ideally, we would have the majority in both tribes. I guess the most likely groups are 5v2 and 4v3. My only concern is that the other tribe might have the immunity idol. In that case, we wouldn’t be able to split votes in the 4v3 tribe. We could in the 5v2 tribe…I guess we will have to see when we switch tribes!

I just wanted to touch base cause I think theres a tribe swap. I also formed a pseudo alliance with kyle and rizo just in case we ever lose to make sure i have the numbers with the Tim's Devils alliance.

I'm in a bit of a peculiar position. Two people on my tribe, Noah and Austin, both appear to want to have me as their number one, both positioning themselves in such a way that it would be advantageous for me to side with them. If this is true, then I am probably in the best spot on this tribe, and I control the vote. Do I side with Noah and vote Tawni, who is much more likely to ditch me in a swap than Amy? Do I side with Austin and vote Amy, which would complete Austin's list and give us control of the idols? Do I vote Cheatham, because I've gone mad with power and it's theoretically possible? So many possibilities! However, the best one in my opinion is to vote Tawni out for two reasons: 1. She popped off at the challenge. Not like "oh no what a physical threat vote her out before she goes on an immunity run". But it's obvious that she put so much effort into the challenge, that even Petrel would recognize that. So if she's voted out, it's clear to everyone that the Thrush tribe may be a bit of a mess. And if we're so disjointed, in the event of a swap, we aren't a coalition worth toppling over. We're numbers they can use to fulfill their own objectives. 2. She never talks to me. Amy never talks to me, but she never talks to anyone. Tawni talks all the time to other people (or so I've heard). Voting her out reduces the number of options other people (Austin) have, forcing them to stick with me or jump into the unknown that is Petrel. I really hope this is the best move, and if I get 14th bc I'm swapfucked then >:( (i guess thats not as bad as a blindside tonight)

Wohooo “we won another challenge this is so great!” I must say I am impressed at how well my tribe is doing and it’s great I’m safe and practically made the merge. However how can I go to a merge and not know who to trust. I trust my corgi alliance and Kyle but Honeslty they haven’t been tested yet to see if they are loyal which is scary. Another calm round where I can’t go into the immunity pool or target someone in my tribe. I’m anticipating a tribe swap, I don’t really want one because if I get tribe swapped I’ll be upset but at this point I’m ready to get some gameplay going and hopefully Chris and myself or Gwen can get this game going.

Shit hit the fan I’ve got a great ally in Sara who filled me in on a lot about our tribe and the other tribe. We work really well together. Turns out there’s a 6 person alliance of Gwen Sara rizo Liam Chris and AnnMarie. Sara felt on the bottom, so she talked to me. She is in an alliance chat with me AnnMarie and Kyle. This alliance of six is supposedly falling apart though. This leaves Tim. He talked to me after my reward challenge win, and he seemed somewhat insecure about his place. He’s pretty much on the bottom. Me and Sara agree that he could be an easy target to keep our place in the game if we lose soon, or if there’s an unfavorable swap. Noah seems to be on the bottom of the other tribe, so that could help us in a swap as well. Tribal happens soon and I’m pretty nervous, not necessarily for what happened at tribal, but what might come after

This entire round has been a mood and I'm extra upsetty spaghetti that I wasn't around more to hassle people! Honestly, I'm just counting the days before I get caught for my shenanigans! I literally spilled the entire idea of the 6 person alliance (as well as other groups) to Steven this round because well, it's full of duos and I'm not any of their priority. Plus, I'm generally not an underdog in games, but I love working with the underdogs and I sorta see Steven as that. If he leaks all I told him, I'm probably screwed...but I think he trusts me because he was willing to pass info and strategize with me too. Lastly, Gwen and Chris are totally a duo and Tim is sketchy...that's all! :)

well, i lost my closest ally dylan so now im feeling pretty alone. i think i could be going this round but some people are telling me to vote tawni so im going to do that and hope it works. wish me luck!

Sooooo I just edited the entirety of the lip sync challenge and it was super fun to watch everyone dance and mess around with the lyrics. I wasn't in love with the song, but I gotta admit that the end result was really nice. Gwen helped out a ton by making a Google docs and organizing things. I'm super disappointed with the other tribe though. It had little effort, and Trent really tore into them. Trent also said that the horn girl had him cracking up. I'm the horn girl. I was very happy. I was told some very interesting stuff about Tim. I already had a pretty bad vibe from him, but I guess Gwen confirmed my inkling. I don't think I will be aligning myself with him during the game.

4 votes Tawni, 2 votes Amy.