#the one with whiskey eyes

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 23 || Fly Away, Away on Coloured Wings

Words: 2700

Warnings: none

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~23~

Iris counted the cracks in the sidewalk absentmindedly. A tea warmed her hands and the sun chased away what would otherwise have been a chilly day. The wind swept through and reminded her occasionally that it was not as warm as the sun would like people to believe. She had remembered to pull a knitted hat over her head, keeping in the warmth and protecting her ears from the chilling breeze.

“Iris!”

The shout of her name drew her attention away from the sidewalk, turning to look toward the main gates to the Philadelphia Zoo. Luke was making his way toward her with a blinding smile on his face. He was dressed down compared to her, wearing his jacket from work that had a nametag clipped over the left side of his chest.

Smiling, Iris stood up from her seat and reached over to where she’d kept Luke’s preferred coffee in the cardboard tray. “Hey, Luke. Black, as you requested,” she started, holding out to tray. He reached forward to take both and stepped in closer until he was able to lean forward and ghost a kiss across her chilled cheek.

“Thanks, Sweetie. Hope you weren’t waiting for too long?”

Iris flushed at the caress of lips across her skin, the sensation steadily becoming familiar. “No worries, only a few minutes. It was nice to get some fresh air away from work. How was your day?” she inquired as she reached up to gently tug on the collar of his work coat. The coat itself had the name Kevin stitched into the fabric, but the alters also had an additional clip-on name tag whenever they were working and covered over Kevin’s name so as not to confuse anyone that tried to read it.

“Pretty quiet today,” he shrugged, turning to face the entrance he’d appeared from while holding his arm out to her. She smiled as she looped her arm through his snugly while taking a sip of her perfectly cooled down tea, saving her tongue from scalding. “Middle of the week is always a good catch-up time for us.”

“It’s usually the same at the store,” Iris responded casually as Luke tried to wave at the man operating the entrance gate, still holding his coffee cup and making it more of a ‘cheers!’ gesture. “Jess went home sick this morning so it was a bit short staffed, but it couldn’t have worked out better than on a quiet day.”

“Aw, she alright?” Luke asked immediately, concern colouring his tone and drawing his brows down. he hadn’t even met her and he was already concerned for the young woman that worked with his soulmate—who clearly cared for the other woman.

Iris smiled at his worry and squeezed his arm comfortingly, and happily. “Just a start of the flu, I think. She tried to work but I think she was starting to turn green so I called her a cab, told her to take off tomorrow and let me know if she needs more time.”

Luke leaned down suddenly and pressed a soft kiss against her hair. “I’m glad you’ve got a friend there, Sweetie.”

Iris smiled against the warmth that took over her cheeks. She turned her face in to press her cheek against his shoulder, inhaling the delicate smell that clung to his jacket. It was an interesting mix of scents—some of which she recognized from her time with BT and Barry. Finally, she forced herself to turn away from his chest and looked at the many pathways that split away from the main area of the park, leading to the various enclosures.

“So, where would you recommend first?” she asked instead, looking up at him through her lashes as she smiled invitingly.

“Oh, the Tigers! No brainer!” he answered immediately, motioning to a path to her right.

Smiling at his enthusiasm, she allowed him to guide her along through the quiet Zoo. The combination of a weekday and a cooler day had most people staying away—occupied with work or preferring the warmth of the indoors. It gave them plenty of space and allowed them to linger in front of the enclosures as Luke told her stories from the past decade working at the Zoo. She listened avidly as she leaned against the railings, or into his side when the wind drew her to his warmth.

Some of the other people working at the Zoo paused in Iris’s peripheral when they spotted them. She wanted to look, wondering what could make them pause, but she forced herself to remain with her focus on her soulmate. She was sure that her soulmates’ situation made it impossible to date so it may make for a strange sight to see Luke—or any of the alters—with a woman pressed into their side tightly.

“I mean, I love animals—they’re beautiful, and Barry loves to sit and draw them when he can—but I’d never try and crawl in with them,” Luke was saying as they were sitting at the bench in front of the large Gorilla enclosure.

Iris’s eyes widened as she looked away from the enormous beasts to where he remained to her left, an arm draped over the back of the bench to encircle her shoulders. “Someone tried to what?” she demanded, shock colouring her tone as clearly as her expression conveyed.

“Oh, yea,” Luke answered, looking over with a matching look of disbelief. “We have to make regular rounds along the perimeter fence because kids come along and cut the locks, thinking they can sneak in sometime through the night. Nothing’s happened while I was here, but I’ve heard horror stories of kids sneaking in, thinking the animals were tame and getting badly hurt.”

The look of horror on his soulmate’s face had Luke paling, immediately tightening his arm around her shoulders so he could draw her in closer. “Not here, Iris. We’re really careful about preventing that.”

Nodding slowly, she tried to remove the mental image of some poor teenager getting mauled by a tiger because they thought the animals were somehow tamed. “That’s terrible,” she mumbled, looking back toward the Gorillas. They were huge, and easily capable of harming some unsuspecting kid that might wander into their domain.

“Sorry,” Luke winced. He hadn’t meant to say something so horrifying; it was just a constant concern for them at work and had slipped out. “Iris, I’m sorry.”

He slipped his hand under the hefty weight of her braid, his hands somehow still warm even against the windy chill, to wrap the comforting weight of his hand at the back of her neck. Iris didn’t acknowledge him right away, still looking over to the animals she had previous thought majestic. However, once the warmth registered and settled, she leaned back against the comforting weight as she heaved a long sigh. “It’s not you, Luke. Nothing you did.”

Turning into his hand, she smiled in reassurance while scooting herself closer to him on the bench.

Luke ducked his head bashfully. “Can you tell I’m not very good at this while dating thing?”

She had suspected at her soulmates had as little amount of dating experience as her. It was heartbreaking to have it confirmed, though. Even those with soulmarks would date the odd person or two before the met their destined one—or multiple. “Luke.” Her stronger tone drew his focus, meeting her eyes with the beautiful blue against whiskey. “I’ve never dated. Not once.” Admitting it aloud pulled a burden from Iris’s chest that left her smiling at his shocked expression. “With how I grew up, I never wanted to open myself up to the chance that someone would hurt me. BT was the first person to ever take me out to dinner—on a date or otherwise.”

Luke’s lips parted to speak, but words seemed to escape him and he simply gapped at her for a silent moment.

“I’m just as clumsy at the whole dating thing,” she assured, angling herself on the bench to face him better while she placed a hand on his chest. “So, we’ll fumble along together. And if someone messes up, there’s nothing wrong with that.”

He continued to stare at her in shock for a moment more before his expression transformed with the blinding smile that he sent her way. It lifted the weight that had settled over her chest and Iris was powerless against smiling back.

“So, where would you recommend we go next?”

“Aviary?” he proposed, still smiling brilliantly.

Iris bounced where she sat, her smile growing from reassuring to pure happiness. “I love birds! Yes!”

Luke stood quickly and hauled her up to her feet, getting a chirp of a laugh from Iris before he was turning them in a new direction and walking her down another path that led toward some of the housing structures.

Majority of the birds were tropical, requiring a warmer climate. Iris was quite pleased by that since she was able to shuck off her coat and chase the chill from her bones. Luke stuck close by, but he let Iris flit from display to display, reading the plaques in front of each enclosure as she looked in at the brilliantly coloured birds. Iris smiled as she watched the birds fly around their habitats, darting in and out of the trees.

There was an option to go in and stand among the birds, but she opted not to—unable to shake the thought of the birds flying overhead and possibly messing her coat.

“Do you have a favourite?” Luke asked when he came to stand in front of the Rainbow Macaws, the large parrots currently preening as they pulled their feathers delicately through their beaks. She stared in awe at how gentle they were with such large, sharp beaks.

“Hm, I don’t think I have one. They’re all so beautiful. Such magnificent colours. Do you have a one?” She glanced at the tall man over her shoulder, seeing that his soft blue eyes were settled on her rather than the enclosures. The attention made her cheeks warm.

Smiling down at her, he gently wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her over to another exhibit. He’d noticed it when he’d been in a few days before to replace a rusting hinge on one of the employee access doors. The enclosure was a bit smaller, as were the birds inside, with bright balls of gold fluff flitting about inside.

Iris leant into Luke’s side as she looked down at the placard. Golden Palm Weaver was titled above a small summary of the birds. The picture showed a smaller bird with beautiful golden feathers and a crown of whiskey reddish gold encircling the face of the bird.

“The reddish hue around the face reminded me of your eyes,” he answered semi-sheepishly.

Iris blinked in surprise for a moment, looking at the picture of the bird then up at the little creatures inside the enclosure. She hadn’t noticed the similarity before. It brought the flush back to her cheeks as she fought against the bright smile that wanted to break across her features. “They’re beautiful,” she mumbled bashfully. His arm tightened around her shoulders, pulling her in closer to his side as he repressed the urge to chuckle at her timidity.

“So why do you like birds so much?”

Her head came to rest against his chest as she continued to watch the small birds in the enclosure, her expression soft.

“They can fly,” she answered. “Their wings and their feathers are so beautifully composed, it’s amazing to think that something like that happens naturally.” Her head bowed slightly in the next moment, obscuring his view of her face. “And their marks are beautiful. Everyone always talks about the brilliant or intricate colours and marks being so pretty and attractive.”

Luke’s heart broke a little.

Turning to press his lips to the top of her head, he inhaled the soft scent that wafted off of her hair. “I can’t teach you how to fly, but I can assure you that your marks are gorgeous; we all love them. Scars and all.”

They spent the next thirty minutes looking over each of the individual bird enclosures and the plaques situated in front of each. Luke never let her stray too far from his hold, keeping his arm around either her shoulders or her waist as she read the plaques to him or gushed about the beautiful colour of each of the birds.

The staff that passed them by would greet him with either a silent nod or a brief shout in greeting on their way passed. Iris always ducked her head down or turned away to pretend as though she was reading or marvelling at the birds. These were his coworkers, people who saw him day after day, and she wasn’t sure they even knew he had met his soulmate.

“They know about you,” he finally declared when he’d noticed her duck her head down the third time.

Whiskey eyes snapped up to him, coloured with her surprise.

“I mean, how can a guy not brag a bit when he finds his girl?” he admitted bashfully, then stuttered when he realized what he’d said. “Not that…not that you’re mine or anything but-”

Iris took pity on him and gently snagged the edge of his coat, tugging him down just enough to ghost a kiss against the corner of his jaw. “Only if you’re mine, too.”

His cheeks flushed against his will, but the smile that lit up his face made it easy to ignore the burning in his cheeks. “Every bit of me, Sweet.”

Again, Iris ducked her head down bashfully. However, Luke could still see the beautiful rose colour that had taken over her cheeks. At least they matched, blush for blush.

Continuing to tour throughout the rest of the Zoo, Iris’s hand stayed fitted snuggly inside Luke’s. He never relinquished it, even when he would move to point at something, he lifted their joined hands and only freed one finger with which to point. It made Iris’s pulse speed erratically, her happiness manifesting with the simple gesture.

Her fascination with the colouring of the birds continued on to the snake enclosure as well; although, she refused politely when the handler told them it was nearly feeding time. They were beautiful animals, but she was not sure she could stomach seeing a baby bunny—dead or not—being fed to the long, elegant creatures.

They finished their journey back at the front entrance where they had started, Iris smiling tiredly as she leaned heavily into his side. Starting the day with work and then following it up with several hours of walking throughout the Zoo had leeched away the last her strength. Luke had no complaints, however, and leaned down to press a kiss against the top of her head whenever the desire struck him. The city was dark around them when they stepped through the front gate—Luke sharing a short wave with the guard watching everyone come and go—and Iris made an adorable attempt at supressing a yawn.

“It got colder,” she mumbled into her coat collar, leaning into him more.

“Nice and warm downstairs,” he assured, leading her to the entrance she had used the past days when staying with her soulmates. The entrance she and Barry had shared their kiss in front of as the snow blanketed them. “Patricia cooked something for dinner, left me instructions to throw it in the oven but warned me about peeking under the lid.”

Iris laughed softly to herself, imagining Patricia’s neat, meticulous writing expressing her warning clearly. She had no problem picturing what the letter would look like. Her mark had appeared so many years ago; she has since traced her finger endlessly over the words on the back of her palm. Iris was sure she could identify all of her soulmates’ printing at a glance by this point—whether she knew the name to each mark or not.

“So you didn’t peek?” she teased, tipping her chin up so she could meet the softness of his gaze. He looked so happy, the streetlights catching his dimples in shadow as he smiled down at her.

“And call on Pat’s wrath?” he joked, recoiling slightly as though the very thought was frightening. “I’m not that curious.”

Iris laughed again, ducking her head to press her temple against Luke’s shoulder, welcoming his warmth and feeling his body shake with his own mirth.

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[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 22 || Softened, Waves to Glass Shards

Words: 3900

Warnings: None

Previous || Next

~22~

Her employers had apparently saw fit to surprise her when she returned to work, the mess having been completely cleaned and the front window replaced, with an old piano they had seen for sale online. The wood was aged and scraped, the children of the previous owners having scratched little characters and names into the legs, but it made her smile none the less. Damaged and aged, it was magnificent. “We haven’t had a chance to arrange for someone to come and tune it yet, but we’ll have someone stop by this week,” Melissa assured softly as she stood next to Iris, her hand on the younger woman’s shoulder as she smiled down at her softly.

Iris had mentioned time and again over the years that she dearly wished to own a piano at some time in her life—this was as close as she was probably ever going to actually get, and it made her heart soar to know that they cared so much for her.

“Thank you, both of you, so much,” she gushed in return as she looped her arm around Melissa’s shoulders in a one-armed embrace, then turned to her husband and did the same. “I think it fits in perfectly, too. Finally got the one thing that this corner needed.” The piano was situated deep in the store, near the back corner where a few comfortable chairs were placed about sporadically, a coffee-table in the middle, and the new piano taking up residence in the corner.

“You’ll have to test it out once it’s ready, check out the acoustics,” Gerald added a moment later, shifting over to wrap an arm around his wife as they gazed down at Iris as though she was a child they had raised; a prideful, parental glisten in their eyes. Iris thanked them again and once more when they were on their way out of the store. The others asked about her wellbeing as they arrived for work, each getting mostly the same answer. Jessica gave Iris a look that told her she knew something else was up with the older woman—she was much too calm, almost happy, after having been through someone attacking the store.

Returning to her work, Iris was somewhat relieved to have returned to the usual routine—even if a part of her desperately missed the time she had been given to spend with her soulmate. Barry had taken the day off of work the day after the incident, allowing her and Felicia to spend the day together, but he had to go back to work the next day while she was kept off of work to relax and recuperate.

She had read and cooked, spending the day in her apartment before she returned with BT to the zoo, the man having taken over the work-load for the day, and laughed as he ooed and awed over her soup that had been left-over from the day before. She had received a call from her employers, telling her that the surveillance cameras had caught the car driving away, but it was such an old system that it was too blurry to make out the person driving or the license plate.

Barry had already arranged for her to stay in his room another night, bowing to her affirmation that she would be returning to her own apartment in time for her return to work. She could tell he was reluctant to do so, and her email had been overwhelmed with the others trying to persuade her to stay longer as well. However, no one forced her hand and for that she was thankful. Not that she could ever imagine any of them actually forcing her into anything, but it was still reassuring to know that they were kind enough to care without being oppressive.

Jessica finally cornered her when Iris was in the office working on paperwork and it was the younger woman’s scheduled lunch. She scooted her way into the room and put herself right next to Iris’s peripherals, wearing an expectant look that forced a laugh from Iris. She tried to keep her composure, but Jessica’s excited look of ‘tell me!’ was too much.

“I met another soulmate,” she finally caved with a smile. Jessica squealed discretely, throwing her hands up in celebration.

“Iris, that’s fantastic! Must’ve made all of this mess much easier to bear, huh?” Iris nodded along in agreement, wishing that she could tell Jessica just how much her soulmates were making everything easier to bear. She had confided in the woman with a fraction of her soulmates, a feat she never thought she would make, but she wasn’t sure she could tell Jessica the full extent of her situation.

Not only the fact that her soulmates were all housed in one body, but also that there were twenty-four of them.

Felicia’s presence in her life had made it easier, all of them had, but that didn’t stop the nagging feeling that came to her stomach when she went to the front area of the store, or when a car passed slightly slower than the others. It was like the situation with her father all over again; not knowing who had done this or why. For all she knew, it was still her father deciding what new ways he was going to torture her. She wouldn’t put it past him, or her mother, to vandalize property.  Or she could have just been terribly unlucky to be somewhere that some kids decided to do something illegal.

“It’ll still be nice to know what the police find. Who has something against a bookstore?” Iris wondered aloud, trying to derail her thoughts as she turned back to the computer and clicked on the items that she needed to print for their inventory.

Jessica hummed in agreement before she spotted the time on the computer and slipped back. “I’m going to run down the street for my break, but I promise I’ll be back on time, okay?”

“Sure, I know you’re always clocked back in on time,” Iris assured with a calm wave of her hand. As Jessica turned into the adjacent room for her things, she called out again, “And take your jacket!”

“Yes, mom!”

Shaking her head with a smile, Iris collected the sheets from the printer and splayed them in front of her while recollecting her pen. At least with her first day back, there was lots of work that she needed to do and it kept her mind occupied and let the hours rush past without her even noticing. She was beginning to marvel at how much she had actually worked before she met Barry, and subsequently the others. Perhaps it was because she now had something to look forward to, but she couldn’t imagine working so many days in a row anymore.

Knowing that she might have time to meet up with one of her soulmates at the end of a day was steadily becoming the driving force to her work-ethic. Some days were harder to focus than others, excited as she was to have her shift end, but it was getting easier and easier. She had found a dear friend in Felicia the past several days; it was nice to have another female to speak with that wasn’t technically her employee. Jessica was a sweetheart for being there for Iris, but it was different when she could be completely herself and honest about her situation.

She desperately wanted to speak with Jessica, full honesty and disclosure about her soulmates, but there was something in her heart that made her want to keep it quiet. It was almost as though she wanted to keep it just between herself and her soulmates—and Dr. Fletcher—as something that was solely for them. She still wanted to prove to the world that her marks exposed the truth about the alters, they were real people, but she wanted it to be just them for a little while longer.

More than half of her soulmates were still unknown to her, so she was in no rush to expose them just yet.

Continuing to switch between her computer and the pages that were sprawled across her desk, Iris could feel a familiar cramping muscle beginning between her shoulders and rolled them with a sigh. Jessica poked her head back in when she returned, getting a soft hum from Iris as she was deeply focused on what she was typing out at the moment. They only had a short time before close so she was trying to finish her work for when everyone had left.

If felt unnatural to stay in the store alone after what had happened the last time; not that her employers allowed that anymore, even if it was completely dead at the end of a long day. Luke and BT had both sent her emails in all capitals that forbade her from working alone; the frown that had come over her face had Felicia muttering an ‘uh-oh’ before she started to laugh. When Iris had asked what was so amusing, she’d proclaimed that the guys may have put their foot in their mouths for the first time.

Iris did not take well to being ordered to do anything, or ordered not to do something in this case, and Felicia knew that from the hours they had spent talking. Iris had told her about her younger years and her childhood, unfortunate as it was, but skirted around some of the darker parts of her past that she wasn’t quite ready to bring up just yet. None of her soulmates knew the same pieces of her past—Patricia and Barry probably knew the most, but even they weren’t aware of some pieces that the others had been privy to.

Sitting back from her work, Iris flexed and stretched her fingers a couple of times to try and get the stiff feeling out of her joints—a few pops and cracks sounded as she did so, telling her in that instant that she had been working in one position for too long.

The tight muscles in her back gave a faint spasm when she straightened herself and rolled her shoulders backward, issuing a faint groan of discomfort. She was looking forward to a warm shower once she was home, and a tea to help her finally relax. Saving her work in Excel and closing the programs, she began the careful and meticulous process of cleaning up her papers and putting them back in the proper files and folders.

Leaving the office in search of Jessica, she found her already locking the front door and turning off the neon open sign that sat in the small window above the door. Iris busied herself with removing the cash drawer from the register, leaving the printouts to Jessica as she counted through the bills and change, writing everything out as she went. They had closed the store enough times that they didn’t need to speak to one another while they counted and switched papers back and forth with a calculator sitting between them.

“And we’re done,” Iris sighed as she snapped the book closed, turning to tuck the receipts in their proper place. Jessica collected the drawer of the register as Iris snatched her keys, flicking the lights off as they passed the switch to head for the safe in the back office.

“So, what’s this new soulmate of yours like?” Jessica finally asked, her patience having surpassed what Iris expected, as they were pulling on their coats. Everything was locked up, all of the paperwork for the day had been completed and both women were excited to be leaving for home.

Iris pursed her lips as she paused a moment before offering a shy smile, “She’s amazing.”

Jessica was still for only a moment before her expression brightened with a warm grin. “She? Well, what’s her name? And please tell me she’s the one that did your hair!”

Iris’s cheeks warmed while she nodded along. “Her name is Felicia, and yes, she’s always excited to do hair and makeup, which I never really did anything—as you know—so she’s had a lot of fun doing mine the past few days.”

Jessica did an excited wiggle as she followed Iris toward the back door, her purse over her shoulder and her scarf and coat wrapped tightly around herself. Iris’s nagging seemed to have gotten through to her because Jessica was finally wearing appropriate clothing for the weather on particular days. Iris set the alarm and locked the door behind them, Jessica waiting outside in the chill before she helped the smaller woman to close the door and click the lock in place.

“Any plans for the evening?”

“A nice long shower,” Iris sighed, rolling her shoulders again as she tucked her hands—and keys—into her coat pockets. Jessica hummed softly in agreement as they turned to leave the back alley, merging into the people already walking home for the evening. “You?”

“Meeting some old friends from school,” she answered easily, almost swaying happily at finally being out of work. “Do…do you want to come?” she offered a moment later, glancing over to Iris as though worried she would scare the woman away with her offer.

Smiling in assurance, Iris shook her head ‘no’. “Thank you for the offer, Jess. But I think I’m just going to try and settle in and sleep.”

A small frown found its place on Jessica’s usually happy expression. “Are you having trouble sleeping? Because of…what happened?” Shrugging one shoulder sadly, Iris confirmed the younger woman’s worries without actually saying a word. “Oh, Iris.”

Iris waved her off calmly. “It’s okay, really. They’re getting better, and I do sleep for most of the night. I’ll be fine! Everyone’s done so much after what happened, I honestly can’t ask for anything more. This last bit is…for me to work out.” Jessica smiled sadly before she saddled up next to Iris and looped her arm through hers, linking them together as they continued down the street. She asked rapid-fire questions about Iris’s soulmates, gushing over how sweet her meeting with BT had been and looking forward to the chance of meeting the others. Iris wasn’t sure how that would turn out, actually, since they all wore the same face.

She might be able to see the differences in them easily enough, but she was sure others struggled with it a bit more.

Finally, they came to the intersection that would separate them and they offered farewells and hugs before Iris jogged to reach the other sidewalk before the light changed again. The evening wind was beginning to pick up, causing her to duck further into her coat for warmth as she quickened her pace to get back to her own apartment. Barry had another staff meeting this evening, so he was going to be working a bit later than her.

Quickly scaling the stairs to her floor, Iris unlocked her apartment—looking anywhere but the section of her door that had once held her father’s note—and slipped silently inside.

The smell of her morning tea still lingered throughout the small space, coaxing her to breathe deeply before she carefully removed her coat and hung it up in its usual place. Leftovers from the night before were already packaged and waiting in her fridge, needing to be reheated, but the thought of a warm shower to loosen up her muscles was much more appealing.

Leaving her dinner until later, Iris entered her small washroom and shucked her clothes off after turning the shower on to a decent—though slightly warmer than average—temperature.

The small space was immediately enveloped in steam, fogging up her mirror and making the air thick and humid. Stopping for a moment, Iris leaned her lower back against the cool counter and heaved a sigh. Her fingers swiped beneath her eyes tiredly. It did nothing to wake her up or relieve the fatigue that was weighing on her bones. She had returned to the habit of trying to drink a variety of calming tea before bed, but it was never enough.

She’s slept better while staying with her soulmates, but she’d noticed that her best nights were when they were within reach. Her nights with Barry close by, or when Patricia had remained after her nightmare. She’d fallen asleep once when she and Felicia were sitting on the couch at her place, talking in quiet tones as they sipped at hot chocolate Felicia had made. She hadn’t even been aware she’d begun to doze, but her soulmate had been watching her energy waver for a while and had been keeping an eye on her. The hot chocolate had been rescued from her hands before Iris had the chance to drop it and a blanket had been tucked around the brunette for warmth.

Iris wasn’t the kind of person to normally nap, and she was shocked how often she’d fallen into an easy sleep around her soulmates. Felicia especially had a knack for soothing her to sleep, calmly playing with her hair and stroking fingertips with just the right pressure down against her scalp.

Slowly, Iris was being enveloped in comfort and warmth. It made going home to a cold apartment that much harder.

Inhaling the humid steam of the shower that had filled the room, Iris finally pushed away from the counter and slipped beneath the stream of water. Her skin stung momentarily as the hot water made contact, but it soothed away quickly and she could swear the heat penetrated right down to the muscle. The ache that had settled between her shoulder-blades finally seemed to melt, allowing her back to relax for the first time all day.

Pulling her elastic from the end of her braid, she carefully began pulling her fingers through her hair to undo the tightly bound plait. Tipping her head back under the water, she sighed in relief to finally have her hair freed. It wasn’t until that moment that she’d realized the tightness of her braid had probably done her no favours. She’d had no headache, but the loosening of her hair made her feel like the last of the tension she had been carrying for the day finally let go and washed away down the drain.

Taking longer than she had for a while to wash her hair and scrub down her pale skin, she was left a pleasant pink from the combination of a soapy loofa and hot water. Turning her body this way and that, letting the water remove the last of the suds from her skin, she stroked her hand along the prominent scars left through her marks. The one on her right thigh suddenly felt substantially softer.

Leaning her back against the warmed shower tiles, her thumb continued to trace up and down the scar absently. She was sure that it had once felt rough; proud flesh that had been split and tortured back together with needle and thread. However, the silvery line seemed like it had smoothed out to better match the surrounding flesh.

Had it been in her head? Did the memories attached to the scar somehow make it feel rougher than it really was?

After taking one more turn around beneath the water to ensure all soap was washed away, Iris finally shut the water off in an effort to force herself from the comfort of the hot, steamy cubicle of her shower. She flinched as she remembered that she hadn’t turned on the little heater out in the main room, meaning the comforting cocoon of warmth was going to be abruptly broken when she opened the bathroom door.

Towelling herself down in an attempt to remove as much water from herself as possible, the petite woman carefully wrapped herself in the terrycloth softness before her focus was drawn away by the familiar chime she had set on her phone to alert her of any incoming emails. She rarely received an email from anyone other than her soulmates, since everyone else she knew—even her employers—would either call or text her. Tucking the upper corner of the towel in as securely as possible, she opened the door in a rush and quickly slipped out into the main room in search of the phone she had left in her coat pocket.

“Oh!” she gasped against the shock of cold, quickly clicking on the heater as she passed, before she resumed her rush for her phone. Goosebumps almost immediately erupted across her damp, exposed skin. Pulling the aforementioned  phone from her coat, hung carefully as it always was once she returned home, she brought the screen to life and looked at the listed notifications.

She must not have heard it, but her phone had gone off several times since she’d returned home. Emails from Patricia, Luke and BT were waiting for her, each only a few minutes apart. An uncontrollable smile softened her features as she read their names. Her little bubble of happiness made her momentarily forget how cold it was in the room. A small droplet of water fell from her hair and hit the screen, blurring Patricia’s name for a moment, and brought reality back to Iris.

Tossing the phone onto her bed, she began pulling warm clothes out for the night. Dressing with haste and using her towel to twist her hair up and help it dry, she curled herself up on her bed with her legs crossed and feet tucked beneath her thighs for warmth.

The little heater was slowly doing its job.

Opening Patricia’s first, she smiled at the older woman’s motherly concern as she asked if she had enough food and hoping she was eating a good dinner. Do not overwork yourself, Iris. Please, promise me you’ll take all the time you really need for yourself. I’m sure you are an amazing employee, but they can manage—your health must always come first.

Warmed by Patricia’s concern, Iris typed back a response assuring her that she still had an additional day off a week and explained, in detail, what she had made herself for dinner the night before; which reminded her, she needed to toss her leftovers in the oven so they had adequate time to reheat properly. She also told her about the gift her bosses has surprised her with upon arriving at work. She was sure her excitement was palpable through her typed words.

BT was checking up on her in a similar fashion, as well as discretely slipping in the question about whether she would be cooking for them again soon. Apparently her soup had been a hit among those who had the chance to eat it, which made her wish she had made more; there had maybe been leftovers for six, so not everyone was able to have a bowl. She offered a promise to make more for everyone soon, the next time she visited their home, and wished him a good night.

Luke, unlike the other two, had an additional message at the end of his email.

Would you like to go out on a date with me? Dinner, tea, a movie? Anything.

Iris’s heart felt as though it stuttered in her chest before a smile lit across her face until she was sure her eyes had laugh-lines creased at the corners.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 21 || Weathered but Not Broken

Words: 3400 +

Warnings: None

Previous || Next

~21~

Iris cradled a coffee between her palms as she sat next to Felicia in the waiting area of the police station. The card that Montez had given to Barry the night before was tucked in her pocket, the officer himself momentarily busy. She had expected the wait, but her nerves were still rattled as she looked around at the other people waiting and the posters that lined the walls.

"Are you okay? You're white as snow," Felicia asked in concern, reaching out to gently stroke Iris's cheek. She had gotten some looks on their way to the station, but both women had studiously ignored them as they walked hand-in-hand along the sidewalk. Stopping briefly for coffee, Felicia had gotten a bewildered look from the barista when she gave her two female names to put on the cups.

Dressed in a dark winter pea-coat and dark skinny jeans that were tucked into ankle boots, she didn't look overly feminine to the average person that walked by. Her mannerisms and her voice, however, were distinctly that of a female. Iris had noticed how she'd shied away at times, tucking her head downward awkwardly to make herself less visible. That is when she'd grabbed her hand and had proudly walked down the street with her larger palm cradled in her hand—bare of gloves.

Iris didn't get the chance to respond before a familiar voice called from the front desk. "Miss. Mayfair?"

Iris turned from her soulmate to catch the eyes of Montez, who looked momentarily surprised at her pin-straight hair and eyes surrounded in red-gold colour. Felicia placed a comforting hand on her leg before Iris stood up, her coffee pressed to her chest as she walked over to meet with the officer from the previous night.

"You're looking much better, Miss. Mayfair. It's good to see," he offered kindly, smiling as he spoke.

"Thank you," Iris mumbled back shyly before her eyes fell on the folder that held her statement. He didn't wait a moment more before he opened the folder and placed her written confession on the table. Her writing was messier than usual, a testament to her shock as she attempted to write. "So I just need to sign at the bottom?" she asked quietly as she placed her coffee just to the side, freeing her hands.

"If you want, you can read it over and make changes. If you sign it, that means that this is final," he answered calmly while sliding the paper closer to her. Iris shook her head, knowing that she was careful enough to repeat each detail the night before as carefully as her muddled brain could. Montez placed a pen on the sheet for her to use, before he patiently waited as Iris picked it up with a much steadier hand and scrawled her loopy signature on the bottom.

"Is that all?"

"Yes, Ma'am, you're free to go. We may contact you in the near future if we have any more questions. I have your cell number, is it alright to use if I need to speak with you?"

"Yes, I always have it with me," she answered easily, reclaiming her coffee as he recollected the sheets. "Have a good day, Officer Montez," she added on with a small smile, happy to be leaving the station. He smiled back before his eyes shifted to look over her shoulder; Felicia had stood up and was waiting for Iris.

She watched his eyes flick down to her hand, where he had caught the flash of her mark on the back of her hand, before he smiled again and nodded to her. Nodding back, Iris turned and headed over to Felicia with a hand outstretched already. Taking her soulmate's hand, the two women slipped from the station without waiting another moment and turned in the direction of Iris's apartment.

"Anything you want to do while we both have the day off?" Felicia finally asked once they were on their way, glancing down at Iris as they dodged people on the sidewalk.

"Honestly? Not a clue," Iris admitted with a slight laugh in her voice. "But considering how cold it is out here, preferably something that's inside?" Felicia laughed as she nodded in agreement, glad that she had pulled on a warm, dark blue hat before they had left—Iris had complimented the colour as soon as she spotted it, saying that it would bring out her soulmates eyes beautifully.

Pretty soon, the two women had crowded themselves into Iris's small apartment with her little heater cranked up to warm the space. Felicia gushed about how small and cute it was, reading the spines of Iris's book collection, then her tea tins, and finally ended at her miniscule wardrobe. She tutted over the oversized, covering clothing but didn't actually say anything against her choice in style. Iris was almost certain that all of her soulmates, even the ones she had yet to meet, were most likely aware of the scars on her body and why she preferred to remain covered.

"You need to buy some colour!" Felicia commented finally, noticing that mostly everything Iris owned was either black or dark grey. "It's so…blah! And you're already my little Snow White, no need to make you look even paler."

Iris huffed a laugh from where she was sitting on her bed, legs crossed comfortably as she watched Felicia card through her small amount of clothes. "Snow White? That's a new one."

Felicia spun with a grin, one of Iris's oversized sweaters in hand. "Oh, my dear Snow, you're basically a walking Disney character. And you can sing! That's even better!""

Iris snorted a laugh, quickly covering her mouth when the sound registered. "If you start calling me Snow, I'm gunna call you Cinnamon." Remembering her first words to Felicia made her smile; it was something sweet and memorable. She felt that she needed to make up for some of the less than kind or sweet remarks that had been left on her soulmate's body thus far.

Felicia gasped comically as she took in the nickname. "Cinnamon? I love it!"

She bounced up on the bed then, nearly tipping Iris over from the exuberance of the action, but both women simply laughed at the action as Iris quickly caught herself with outstretched palms. "Does my closet pass your approval?" she asked after a moment, nodding her head toward the corner of dark clothing hung up meticulously on cheap hangers.

Felicia made a face while glancing between her soulmate and the closet. "We definitely gotta go shopping once it warms up; you need some colour in your life. But, for now, it'll have to do." Iris laughed again, rocking her body to the side to give Felicia a slight shove.

As silence fell between them, Felicia glanced at Iris as a question sat on the tip of her tongue. Iris had mentioned the light earlier that morning, so she was picking up on things they said when talking about the other alters in Kevin's body, but she wondered just how much Iris understood. She was a smart woman, so Felicia was almost certain she'd done her own research on the subject, but to ask one of them would provide her with the best answer to anything she didn't understand.

"So, Iris," she finally started, deciding that she would at least give her little soulmate the chance to ask. "I understand that the…situation with me and the others—Barry and BT, all that—can be kinda confusing, so I was wondering if there was anything you wanted to ask?" Iris's soft gaze turned to her, eyes widened with surprise. "I know there's some stuff out there that explains D.I.D, but I'd be happy to give you a first-person explanation if you want it."

"Really?" Iris asked after a small pause. "You wouldn't be…offended?"

"Because you don't know everything?" Felicia asked, appalled. "No! Iris, none of us expect you to have full knowledge about us. Even when compared to other people that have multiple personalities, we're a whole other story. No one else in the world has ever had so many alters in one body—at least not that has been recorded. And you're proof that we're all real. Every mark on your body proves that we're not just a…glitch in the brain."

Iris reached out and caught Felicia's hand, the action so fast it was as though she was flinching. "I never thought that," she was quick to assure. "I know you're all as real as me or another other living person. I never doubted that, and it makes me sick to think that other people don't believe you are." Shuffling around so she was facing Felicia, Iris lifted her free hand to stroke her cheek. "Our bond is nothing like another out there, and I love that."

Felicia smiled back, pleased to hear how Iris had fully accepted her bond with them, as strange as it may be.

Iris looked down at Felicia's hand, cradling it between her palms in her lap. "I'm learning, bit by bit, each time I meet a new soulmate. I tried to research D.I.D, but even Dr. Fletcher's research was…biased? It was scientific, not reality. I felt like it was dehumanizing the people that I had met, so I stopped trying to read about it and decided that I would…go with the flow?" she explained carefully, not quite sure how to phrase it.

"Is there anything you want to ask me?" Felicia offered again, calmly waiting for Iris as she closed her eyes in concentration. It looked like she was trying to decide on which question to ask. "Ask me anything, Iris," Felicia continued, turning her hand over to hold one of Iris's smaller ones. "Anything and everything, if that's what you want."

Opening her eyes to meet Felicia's soft blue gaze, she took a steadying breath before nodding along. "One thing I wondered about was if you are all aware of what happens with whoever is in the light? You mentioned earlier that Barry being in the light made it possible for everyone to feel my fear…"

"We don't see or hear what the other alter experiences when they're in the light," Felicia assured. "I could talk to the others right now; I could tease Barry-"

"Don't you dare!" Iris laughed, seeing the teasing grin that had lit Felicia's expression before she continued.

"I can talk to the others, but they don't experience what I see or hear or whatever. I can show them if I really wanted, but we don't do that very often. Since only some of us have met you, when those people are in the light the sensations from the soulmark are…amplified."

Iris nodded along as she listened to her explanation, her fingers tracing Felicia's hand mindlessly. "Can more than one of you be in the light at the same time?"

This time, Felicia hesitated. "Not exactly at the same time, but there's been times when some of the others have switched who uses the light at a speed that it makes it seem like they're sharing it. Like, they can have conversations aloud with each other. We don't usually do that, though, since we can converse without doing it."

Iris noticed that she had offered the explanation without any names, so she took Felicia's hesitation as being trying to avoid revealing names of soulmates that Iris hadn't met yet. The others didn't seem to care about slipping names into conversation, but that didn't mean everyone else was the same. Felicia probably didn't want to confuse Iris by bringing up people she hadn't met yet.

"Do you guys have a fixed…schedule?" Iris hesitated a bit more this time, worried that the question would come across rude.

Felicia, however, answered it easily and without a care. "Not really. For work there is, but that's just because not everyone can actually do maintenance. I'd probably get us fired, so…"

Iris laughed at Felicia's attempt to cheer her up, feeling the worry she carried steadily ease. Once she'd calmed down, she glanced over toward the kitchen. "So, what do you want for lunch? I can make us some soup, and a fresh coffee?"

"That sounds fantastic," Felicia agreed, glancing over toward the window where Iris's heater was humming away, warming them up. It had begun to snow again shortly after they'd reached her building, the two breathing a sigh of relief to have escaped the sudden return of the storm. Iris shuffled off the bed and slipped into her small kitchenette, pulling out a large pot and some cutting boards. Felicia slid to the edge of the bed as she carefully watched Iris's trained motions.

Living on her own, she'd developed a routine when it came to preparing her meals and was glad that Felicia stayed back and out of her way.

She started the coffee first, before she began the prep work for the soup as the coffee brewed loudly in the corner. Their conversation turned to lighter topics as Iris hustled from side to side of her tiny kitchen to the other, Felicia's eyes followed her avidly as she asked about her soulmates reading habits, preferred music or movies.

At one point, Iris admitted that she'd once cut her hair short in a pixie cut years back—Felicia had eyed her meticulously straightened hair and pursed her lips. The brunette had laughed at her soulmate's expression before she shook her head. "Don't worry, I know it looked terrible on me. I plan on keeping it long from now on."

Felicia sipped her coffee as Iris finished putting everything in the pot and left the soup to cook as she moved over to sit on the edge of her bed, next to Felicia, as she took her own hot coffee back in hand. "So, have you gone to school? Any of you?" Iris asked once she'd gotten comfortable.

Felicia shrugged. "Kinda. I mean, we've taken some courses that would give us some advantages, but we don't have a diploma or a degree. We all have such different hobbies and likes, it would cost a fortune for us to all take something that we wanted. So, we took courses that would give us a leg up for a job. Like a business and management course. You?"

Iris shook her head immediately. "I love to learn, but everything I pick up is self-taught—except for some music lessons I paid for to get my footing. I love reading and I usually pick up whatever I want to know from that. Books are my favourite, but I'll get the odd ebook or online resource if I need to. I was so shocked when my bosses hired me on as a manager. I mean, I'd been there for a while but I'm sure they had more educated people they could've hired."

Felicia smiled in assurance as she bumped her soulmate's leg with her own. "Sometimes experience is better; I mean I'd rather have someone that had already been working for a while than someone straight out of school with no actual experience. It's unfortunate, but true."

Nodding in agreement, Iris tucked the soft strands of her straightened hair back behind her ear. It was so much silkier and easily fell in her face once it was straightened.

"Want me to braid that back?" Felicia offered once she'd spotted Iris do the same thing for a third time. She'd been trying to keep it out of her face desperately while she'd been cooking, but that had been a necessary thing; now, it seemed like it was beginning to bother her. After all, it wasn't something she usually had to deal with.

Iris flushed at being caught. "Oh, no, that's okay! It's just my curls usually stay where I put them-"

Felicia scoffed before she took both of their cups and placed them aside. "Relax, honey, I won't take it personally. Besides, I need some practice with braiding! Turn around, and scoot over here."

Knowing it was futile to argue, Iris turned her back to Felicia and pushed all of her hair over her shoulders. It worked out well, since Felicia was a bit taller than her while they were sitting and enabled her to see the top of Iris's head.

Beginning to section the beginning of the French Braid, Iris found herself once more leaning back into the gentle touches against her scalp. It was blissful and relaxing, causing her skin to prickle with sensitivity. She'd never thought that something as simple as someone stroking their fingers through her hair and along her scalp, a barely-there caress, would cause such a powerful and immediate reaction. Felicia hummed at the soft strands of Iris's hair, never touched with heat or chemicals to make it brittle or unhealthy.

"I love your hair," she sighed wistfully, wishing that she had hair like her soulmates. "You know I'm going to enjoy long hair vicariously through you, hm? If I'm in the light that day, you've gotta let me do your hair."

Iris just hummed in agreement as she leaned her hair back against Felicia's dextrous fingers, getting a giggle in response before she returned her concentration to making the braid even and straight.

The small apartment was beginning to smell strongly of vegetables and broth, a mouth-watering smell that made Felicia realize it had been a while since she'd—they'd—eaten something home-cooked. Patricia would sometimes make nice, fresh meals, but she wasn't in the light often enough for all of them to get the chance to eat the wonderful food.

"I haven't even tried that soup yet and my mouth is already watering," she admitted after a couple quiet minutes of silence, Iris continuing so sigh contentedly as Felicia took longer than necessary to do her hair. She was passed the base of Iris's skull now, meaning that the remainder of the braid didn't give her the excuse to stroke Iris's scalp or run her fingers through the soft strands near the roots.

"We also haven't eaten yet," Iris tried to explain, sounding sleepy.

"That's not why," Felicia argued. "It smells fantastic! I could have just stuffed myself with chocolate and whatever else and I promise you, I'd still be drooling over that smell. And debating whether a bowl would make me pop or not and if it's worth it."

"I need to stir it," Iris mumbled tiredly, her eyes closed as she basked in the sensation of her hair being played with for a second time that day. She had many years depraved of physical contact to catch up on.

Felicia tied off Iris's hair and gently guided her soulmate to lie down. "I'll keep an eye on the soup. Why don't you take a nap?"

Whiskey eyes opened to look up at her, a protest already on her lips, but Felicia gave her a look and lifted a finger to her lips in a gesture of silence. "Uh-uh, rest. Even if you slept well last night, you've got some catching up to do. Sleep!"

Fighting a smile as she nodded in defeat, Iris rolled onto her side, tucking her legs up from where they'd been hanging off the bed. Felicia snatched the throw that was folded up and placed along the middle of the bed, shaking it out, before she draped it over Iris's already-dozing form. The brunette's eyelids barely fluttered at the sensation of the blanket covering her, her relaxed state aiding her in falling asleep that much faster.

Felicia crouched next to the bed's edge as she watched her soulmate's peaceful expression, a blissful smile on her face as she thought over the past several hours since she'd woken with her soulmate in her arms, cradled against her chest. Barry was one lucky bastard to have Iris's love, but Felicia couldn't bring herself to be jealous when she knew that—in their unique way—she was Iris's as well.

The small woman's heart was almost too big, especially for someone who'd been put through so much in her younger years.

Brushing her bangs aside, Felicia leaned in a pressed a ghost of a kiss against Iris's pale forehead before she stood up and went to manage the steaming soup.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 19 || Beneath the Gentle Snow

Words: 4100+

Warnings: Mentions of Past Trauma

Previous || Next

~19~

Iris had not moved by the time Barry arrived in the store. He had to show Kevin’s ID to prove he was he one that Iris was expecting—he was incredibly thankful she had given Kevin’s name and not one of the alters, or that would be much harder to explain. He had taken the officer’s advice and was carrying a warm cup of tea from the café they had gone to that first night, guided around the mess of glass and the owners of the store who were speaking with a detective on scene.

The sight of the broken window and cops swarming all over the place had his hand tightening on the cup, trying not to picture how terrified Iris must have been when someone broke the window. She had sounded as though she was on the cusp of breaking down when he spoke with her on the phone, and that was after she had some time to calm down.

Led to the back of the store by a woman named Sinclair, she stopped Barry right before they were to enter the back office. “Here, let me take that from you,” she proposed, motioning to the tea. “I’m sure you’ll want your hands free.”

Barry nodded numbly as he handed her the tea—he hadn’t even thought of that. He probably would have just dropped the damn thing to let Iris into his arms. With his hands now free, the officer nodded to the door as a silent instruction to head inside. The door was slightly ajar already, a man’s voice drifting from within. Pushing the door open slowly, Barry stood in the doorway of the small office as he watched Iris sign the bottom of her police statement regarding the incident.

The sight of his tiny soulmate, one hand tucked in close to her chest and the other shaking unsteadily as she tried to sign the paper, nearly broke his heart. Knowing she had been in danger was more nerve-wracking than the nights he had known she was struggling to sleep—first because of their unfortunate beginning, and then again because of her father.

“Miss. Mayfair, you can finish this at the station. Just come by tomorrow, give yourself some time to calm down,” the male officer with her was instructing, trying to persuade her from continuing to attempt a sloppy signature from her shaking hand.

“Iris,” Barry called finally, more a sigh of relief to see that she truly wasn’t hurt than anything else. Immediately, her head snapped to the side, chocolate braid flying, and those watery, whiskey eyes landed on him with a look of such relief that Barry was moving before he even thought about doing so.

He didn’t care about the cops or the noise or the tiny space they were stuck in. Iris leapt from the chair and was infolded tightly in his arm in the next instant, small arms wrapped around him so tightly he was momentarily stunned by her strength. Releasing the breath he had been holding, Barry pulled her in against him until she had nearly disappeared into the bulk of his arms and coat. She made no sound, but he could feel her entire body shaking like a leaf in the wind.

Part of it was because of the adrenaline that must have flooded her system, now beginning to dissipate, but he also noticed that she was only in the thin, long sleeved shirt she had been wearing for work. They may have been in the back, but the window had been busted long enough that the entire store was frigid with the cold wind that had blown in earlier that day.

Her hands were icy against his back, the cold reaching him through his shirt. Keeping one arm wrapped securely around her shoulders, he used his free hand to rub up and down her back soothingly, trying to use the friction to bring more warmth at the same time. “You’re freezing, Sweetheart. Where’s your coat?”

“Locker,” she mumbled against his chest, the word barely audible. “In the break room.”

“I’ll go,” the officer that had been with her volunteered, stepping away from the couple and silently leaving the room as Sinclair leant past Barry to place the hot tea on the desk next to Iris’s statement. A moment later, they were alone.

“You promise you’re okay, Iris? You didn’t get hurt?” Barry asked a moment later, shifting his hold so he could run his hand along her soft hair—he’d said she got some glass in it, hadn’t he? That window had exploded with a pretty decent distance; there was glass all the way down the aisles.

“I’m okay now,” she assured, tightening her hands in the back of his shirt. “I just want to warm up, and lie down.” Pulling back just enough to look up at him, Barry felt his heart clench at the paleness of her cheeks, and the shadows beneath her eyes. It reminded him of the night they met up again at Dr. Fletcher’s, when Iris had come running without her coat.

Framing her face with his hands, her skin cold against his warm palms, Barry watched as she relaxed into the touch and sighed from the warm feeling. “Come back to our place tonight,” he proposed abruptly, blurting out the suggestion before he really thought about it. She blinked in surprise. “You’ll be safe, and I don’t want you to be left alone.”

Her expression softened and her eyes drifted closed before she nodded against his hands. Her agreement finally let Barry relax, knowing that he could keep an eye on her and assure himself and the others that she was safe with them. Still cradling her face, he leant down to press a warm kiss against her forehead, letting out a trembling exhale. Finally, his heart began to beat normally in his chest. He would need to speak with the others, but he knew they would all agree with his offer and welcome their soulmate in with open, grateful arms.

“Miss. Mayfair.” Pulling back enough, Barry and Iris both looked over to Montez, who stood holding her coat and bag in his hands. “You can go home now. Please get some rest tonight, and you can come by the station tomorrow to review and sign your statement.”

Nodding reluctantly, Iris admitted defeat. Her hands were too shaky to sign her name, and her brain grew foggier as the adrenaline wore off. “Thank you, Officer Montez.” Barry helped her pull on her coat and took her bag for her. She was soon bundled in her coat and scarf, the tea Barry had purchased cradled carefully between her hands. Initially, she was worried she would drop it, but it was only a small and was light enough she could keep her grip on the warm beverage. Barry accepted a card from Montez with his information on it, saying that he’d be working the next day and to just ask for him.

Montez stayed to collect her statement as Sinclair escorted them back to the front. Mrs. McIntosh stopped her just briefly to check on her and assure her that the store would be closed the next day. She smiled gratefully at Barry, the look in her eye telling him that she knew exactly what his connection with Iris was, before she let the two of them head outside.

An officer offered to give them a ride, Barry accepting gratefully now that they wouldn’t need to try and hail a cab or call a company to have one come by. Kevin’s ID had an apartment provided at the south side of the zoo, so it wouldn’t be suspicious to have them dropped off there by the officer. He didn’t usually go to Kevin’s work-provided apartment, but it came in handy now and then. The cop opened the door for them and Barry helped Iris to bundle herself in first before he joined her.

As soon as he was beside her, Iris folded herself into his side with the tea still between her palms. Barry heaved a sigh of relief as he let his head rest atop hers.

They had been preparing somewhere for her, but it was far from being complete. He would let her stay in his room tonight and they would figure out where to go from there. If she wanted to stay more than one night, he would gladly give up his room for however long she wanted. Knowing Iris, she would feel terrible about taking his room, but she also didn’t understand how deeply he and the others felt for her already. They would burn the world if she asked.

Being so close to the zoo, it only took a few short minutes for them to pull up at the gates to the back entrance. Barry quickly thanked the officer when he opened the door for them, helping Iris out as she continued to clutch the tea. He watched her eyes widen in interest when she finally took in where they were. The sounds of the animals could still be heard in the distant buildings, too far to be seen.

“The zoo,” she mumbled in surprise. Then her lips lifted in a tired smile. “You live in the zoo?” Barry watched the cruiser pull away before he spoke.

“Well, under it,” Barry answered sheepishly. “Come on, I’ll show you.”

Pulling out the ring of keys—a rather large number of keys—he unlocked the gates and led Iris inside. Keeping an arm around her, he watched her as she took in their surroundings, her expression showing no sign of disgust or judgement about his accommodations. “Is that why you work for the zoo?” she asked after a minute of walking up the winding paths. “Because you live here? Or do you live here because you work for the zoo?”

“I got the job first and found out that a bunch of the old buildings were abandoned, so I started working on making a place for all of us. We all have space here, so it was perfect. It’s…not very legal, but-”

Iris took his hand gently, cradling her tea against her chest so as not to drop it. He stopped talking, glancing down at her kind expression as she stroked her warm, gloved thumb over the back of his hand. “I lived on the streets, remember? You found and made yourselves a home. I see nothing wrong with that.”

A smile grew across Barry’s lips as she spoke, feeling his face warm at her kindness. “You’re perfect, Sweetheart, you know that?”

Iris repressed the urge to scoff, but pursed her lips slightly as she bowed her head. Barry stopped them outside the door to the underground tunnels, turning Iris to face him. Drawing her in closer, he pressed a firm kiss against his cheekbone before wrapping her in his arms again—careful of her tea between them.

“You’re perfect, Iris. I’m so glad you’re mine.”

She shivered at the feeling of his breath at her ear, his words reaching the depths of her soul. One of her arms slipped up to wrap around his neck, returning his embrace as she buried her face against his neck. Her emotions welled inside of her like a storm; she wanted to laugh and to cry, fighting against a whimper of all things that wanted to burst free from her chest. Holding Barry only caused the emotions to surge stronger, making her tremble against his presence.

“I love you,” she whispered instead, keeping her hold around his neck and shoulders tight. The muscles beneath her hand twitched and tensed for a moment before he relaxed against her, while bringing her in closer. The warm breath against her ear shuddered, like he was fighting to breathe. The words felt right as they rolled off her tongue, her heart free of regrets.

She loved him. She loved all of them. Having met them or not, they were hers and she loved them with all of her heart.

She would burn the world for them, too.

Turning his head to press a kiss against temple, Barry could feel the burn of tears as happiness threatened to overwhelm the rest of his senses. “I love you, too.” He felt her draw back enough to return the kiss he had given her upon his cheek, lips trembling and warm breath teasing his skin. Pulling back enough to meet her gaze, whiskey eyes glistening much like his own, he couldn’t stop the smile that brightened his features.

Snow peppered Iris’s dark hair and the mix of emotions and cold air had brought a rosy colour to her cheeks. She was the picture of beauty as she gazed up at him with her lips turned up the faintest bit to mirror his smile, her palm warm against his cheek as she shifted her hold on him. He could see only happiness and peace in her expression, her confession done with honest emotions. “I love you, Barry,” she repeated, her voice stronger this time.

Barry’s cheeks nearly hurt with the force of his smile, watching as Iris’s smile grew as well at the sight of his emotions so clearly on display. His head tipped forward to rest his beanie-covered forehead against hers. Taking a moment to silently bask in the moment, he took in the sensation of Iris’s thumb caressing his cheek and the gentle warmth of each exhale warming his lips against the cold wind.

Remembering the morning that he had walked her to work, Barry gazed into warm amber before he closed his eyes and tipped his head. His lips claimed hers, completing the kiss that almost was when she had turned her head that one morning. A soft sigh escape her before she lifted her chin to press back, parting her lips just slightly to take his bottom lips between hers. Closing her eyes completely, unbidden but joyful tears streamed down her cheeks.

A shiver disrupted the peace as icy wind blew across the back of Iris’s neck, the smile on her face assuring Barry that her tears were not of sadness when he pulled away to look down upon her. “Let’s get you inside,” he offered, keeping a warm, heavy arm across her shoulders as he unlocked the door for them and pulled it open with ease.

Iris shuffled in ahead of him, shaking the snow from her hair as he closed and locked the door behind them.

Flipping on the hall lights, a set of stairs immediately descended into the underground tunnels. Barry shook his shoulders as he looked bashfully at the ground. He knew that she wouldn’t judge, but he still wished he could show her a nicer place to stay. She noticed his silence and reached back to take his hand again. “Show me,” she encouraged softly, using the other hand that still held the tea to carefully wipe her cheek.

Barry reached forward naturally, wiping the other cheek free of salty tears.

Holding her hand, he led her down the stairs and into the confining tunnels that he and the others had made their home.

Majority of the walk was hallways with dim lighting, kept fairly clean because of Dennis’s habits and Patricia’s concerned nature. Their steps echoed off the walls as he guided her into the center of the abandoned buildings, where the old employees of the zoo had offices and break rooms, which included the kitchen that thankfully had working appliances.

Unlocking the last door that separated his home from the halls, Barry held it open for Iris to enter first. Iris stepped inside and immediately began looking around, taking in the sparingly placed décor and personal items. With so many different personalities and preferences, she could understand that one main way of decorating would be hard. Some furniture was spread sporadically, yet meticulously, and she could detect touches of Patricia from the throws or pillows that were placed carefully around the little living room.

The bookshelves were a bit of a disaster and she could see little piles of papers with writing and drawings from where she stood.

A set of dumbbells were stashed beneath one of the couches, barely peeking into her sight. Luke’s leather jacket was hung on the corner of the chair at the table, a woman’s soft red pea coat on the opposite side.

Barry watched as she took in the minute details that were haphazardly spread throughout the main room. The kitchen was off to the side, Patricia’s collection of herbs stacked in main view and the large cupboard of cereals left open from that morning when he’d made breakfast before work. “What…what do you think?” he asked nervously, even though he could see her lips turned up in a smile.

“I can see you,” she answered quietly. “And Luke,” she added, motioning to the jacket, “BT, Patricia…”

Barry relaxed as he watched her attention jump from possession to possession, seeing her soulmates among the chaos. She could also see a few children’s colouring books, and several different types of shoes neatly sectioned away. Walking over to the corner that had some of his drawings scattered about, Barry swallowed as he watched her inspect some of his work. Her attention was caught by one of the more recent ones, which he was wishing he’d stashed away now, that he had drawn with her in mind. The model was faceless, but it was of a thin, small woman that appeared enveloped in a plush jacket of whiskey-coloured softness. He had tried to capture the colour of Iris’s eyes, but it was a difficult shade to recreate.

“These are amazing, Barry,” she breathed out in awe, leaning closer to take in some of the details. “You’re very talented.”

“Thanks,” he mumbled bashfully as he pulled his beanie off. “Uhm, we’ve been getting a room ready for you but it’s not quite done. You can…stay in my room tonight. I’ll ask one of the others if I can use their room-”

“Barry,” she interrupted softly, moving to place her tea down on the little dining table. “I don’t want to kick you out of your room.” He opened his mouth to insist, but Iris placed her fingertips against his tips before he could get a sound out. “You slept next to me when you were at my apartment. Can you stay with me again?”

He hadn’t even really thought about it until that moment, but she probably didn’t want to be alone after the fright at the store. She had no clue who had thrown the pipe through the window, for all she knew it could have been her father, or the man and his wife that had tried to get the money from her for a refund that didn’t exist.

“My bed’s a bit smaller than yours,” he admitted in forewarning, but she just smiled up at him.

She looked ready to speak again before her words were interrupted by a long, deep yawn that caused a quiet popping sound in her jaw. Barry pursed his lips at the adorable sight of her covering her mouth with the sleeve of her coat, eyes squeezed closed.

“I’ll give you a proper tour tomorrow,” he offered, moving to turn off the lamp on the desk. “For now, time for bed.”

Iris was physically and emotionally drained, the slight boost in energy from their moment outside beginning to subside and return the exhaustion of an adrenaline crash.

Guiding her through the smaller hallways to his room, Barry began shuffling through his closet to pick out some warm, clean clothes for her to wear. She was going to be swimming in anything he gave her, so he found the warmer items that he owned—a pair of sweatpants that could be tied at the waist, and a long sleeved, flannel sleep shirt. “Here, you can wear these tonight. Are you hungry at all?”

Iris shook her head as she took the clothes from him. “I don’t think I could stomach anything right now.”

Showing her to the nearby washroom, crowded with different soaps, towels, toothbrushes and other supplies, she took the new toothbrush that he offered her before he left her alone to change and have a moment to herself.

Iris closed the door of the bathroom and placed the clothes he had given her on the counter, avoiding the different razors and face soaps that covered a decent amount of its surface. Her gaze travelled over the twenty-three different toothbrushes, as well as the abundance of hooks on the back wall that each had a different coloured towel hanging from it. She had wondered how all of the personalities lived among one another; seeing it now, it only made her more curious.

Quickly brushing her teeth and washing her face, she pulled on the large clothes that Barry had provided. The pants had to be rolled at the ankles and waist in order to remain up, and the sleeves of the shirt hung past her wrists and draped loose around her thin shoulders. The sight of herself in Barry’s clothes almost made her laugh. She looked like a small child in an adults clothing. Pulling her hair from the braid and brushing it out with her fingers, she took a deep, calming breath to ease the fluttering in her stomach.

Would it be different to fall asleep next to Barry after she had confessed her love for him? After the kiss they had shared?

Finishing up in the bathroom and collecting her armful of clothes, jacket included, Iris stepped out into the hallway and spotted Barry waiting just outside of his room in a different set of clothes. As soon as he saw her emerge from the washroom, he pushed hurriedly off of the wall and watched her approach him with an amused look brightening his baby-blue eyes.

“I look like a kid,” Iris said first, knowing why he looked so amused.

“It’s cute,” he assured, motioning her into his room.

The walls were almost completely covered in drawings, several sketchbooks and portfolios stacked on the desk and shelves he had installed around the room. He’d hurriedly made his bed when she was in the washroom and had snatched an extra pillow from the linen closet. “I’m gunna go brush my teeth. Just…make yourself at home.”

Watching him duck back out into the hallway, Iris carefully put her clothes on the chair in front of his desk, trying not to disturb any of the papers scattered around. She spotted another drawing similar to the one she had seen in the living room area, this time with the woman in the drawing wearing an elegant black dress with lace designs.

Not wanting to invade his privacy, she stepped away before getting too caught up and shuffled over to the bed. Shyly drawing back the covers, she tried not to overthink as she slipped under the sheets, the smell of Barry’s soap and cologne immediately overwhelming her senses. Relaxing into the familiar, comforting scent, her exhaustion returned almost instantaneously.

It felt as though her body became boneless as she lay beneath the warm covers of Barry’s bed, the pillow beneath her head smelling like clean linen. She was barely aware of the lights turning off, her eyes only opening when she felt the mattress dip and the covers shift slightly to adjust to the new body settling beneath. There was still a light on somewhere, probably the hall, because she could barely make out the sight of Barry lying across from her.

“Thank you, Barry,” she mumbled tiredly. It was doubtful that she would have slept if she had gone back to her apartment and spent the night alone.

“Anything for you, Sweetheart,” he assured quietly, the deep rumble of his lowered voice causing her to smile before she shuffled closer to his body. His arm came around her naturally, enfolding her against his chest as she sighed in contentment. “Goodnight, Iris.”

“’Night,” she mumbled back, barely aware enough to get the word out before she had dropped off to sleep. Barry remained awake for a short while more, watching over her as she slept to make sure that no nightmares disturbed her sleep. He couldn’t wipe the smile from his face as he held her tight, delaying his own sleep to enjoy the time he had with her in his arms. He wasn’t sure what was to come when they woke in the morning, but he knew that he would need to share her with the others again. He wanted to enjoy his time while he could.

He fell asleep to her even, gentle breaths against his chest and the whispers of the other alters in his mind.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 18 || My Peace, Like Shattered Glass

Words: 3200+

Warnings: Trauma, Acts of Violence

Previous || Next

~18~

“Ow!”

“That’s why I wear gloves,” Iris teased gently as she smoothed a Band-Aid over the badly stinging cut that Jessica had obtained when trying to rip open a box—it was basically a papercut, but when it was caused by cardboard, the pain was considerably more; as was the amount of blood that had welled up to the surface of the cut.

“I thought that was to hide the mark,” Jessica admitted quietly, her low voice deliberately making sure that their coworkers didn’t hear what she said. “You’re always wearing them.”

“This is the fourth time you’ve cut yourself this week,” Iris pointed out in counterattack, causing the younger woman to flush in embarrassment before she simply shrugged her shoulders. There was no defense against that. Iris shook her head with a gentle smile, collecting the garbage from disinfecting and covering the cut, tossing them into the nearby trashcan of the office. “You should get a pair, you know. Boxes and books don’t just cause papercuts, but they dehydrate your hands as well. Wearing a pair of these will stop that.”

“Don’t rub it in,” Jessica grumbled half-heartedly. Iris just gave that same smile as she stood up.

“I know it’s a bit earlier than usual, but why not take your break now?” Iris asked instead, briefly checking the time on the bottom of the office computer’s screen. Jessica agreed easily, happy to get off shift and eat something. The two women went their separate ways once they left the office, Iris making her way back into the store as she smiled to her coworkers and reclaimed her place behind the register.

She knew they were whispering about her, confused by why she was constantly smiling and always seemed to be happy. Not that she’d been doom and gloom before, but they couldn’t remember a time when she had smiled and showed her happiness so openly and constantly. Jessica was still the only one to know about her marks—or at least the fact that there is more than one—but they had all been able to notice the change in their manager in the past few weeks. She’d gotten worse, to the point that she had been forced to take time off, before she miraculously got better.

There were still days when they could tell she hadn’t slept well, for whatever reason, but they were few and far between.

Iris wasn’t able to see her soulmates every day, try as either of them might, but they spoke constantly. She would wake up to emails from whoever was in the light that day, but she would usually write to all of them every morning—she hated feeling like any of her soulmates were being neglected. Continuing to do this as more and more of them are met, she isn’t sure, but she knows that she will go out of her way to make sure they are all…loved. Welcomed and acknowledged for their individuality.

It was surprisingly difficult to focus on her work—she had never had anything in her life to distract her before. Even fear of her parents had bled away after a time, but her soulmates were ever present on her mind.

Absentmindedly, Iris stroked a fingertip over the mark on the back of her palm.

They were all so different, it made her wonder who else was in the body of Kevin Crumb. When would she meet Hedwig, the supposed child? Or Jade, a younger female than Patricia?

“Looks like the cold-front has arrived,” Sarah called from the front window, a box perched on her hip as she glanced back toward Iris. The young woman’s eyes turned to the window, blinking in shock at the white-out of flurries that had overtaken the view outside the storefront.

Her face pinched slightly uncomfortably, knowing that her walk home was going to be horrendous. “That’s gunna be so cold,” she mumbled to herself, but it was loud enough for Sarah to hear. It had been chilly enough on the walk in to work, heading home through the snow was going to be so much worse. Sarah gave her a pitying look before she turned to get back to work.

Instead of letting herself become distracted by thoughts of walking home, Iris collected one of the boxes that needed to be scanned through and took it to the main counter. Sarah continued to clean and organize the front displays—it was a quiet day and there was very little to do for the group without more customers coming in.

Iris herself had been there since five o’clock that morning, completing some of the reports that needed to be sent to the owners by the end of that week. Not wanting to wait and rush through it, she decided to come in a few hours before her usual time and get in a bit of silent work. She was feeling more exhausted as the day drew on, but at least her sleep the night before had been a fitful one until her alarm had gone off.

Of course, her day did not get any better when she got a call from David, who sounded like death, saying that he had tried but he wouldn’t be able to come in to work. As an old habit, she didn’t want to bother anyone else and just decided that she would stay for the full shift and close the store down as well. Jessica and Sarah both shooed her to the back for a long break, however, and made sure she ate the soup she had brought and even made her a tea with the kettle they had in the break room.

It made Iris wonder if they had gotten a lecture about how she was always doing things for them. Her boss definitely had not liked how she was always working, taking the weekend and evening shifts or filling in for the others when they did not or could not come in. It wouldn’t have surprised her if her employees had gotten a lecture during her forced days off.

“Do you want me to get you a tea? Or a coffee? How about-”

“Jessica,” Iris interrupted, her voice carrying an amused tone as she shook her head at the younger woman. “Calm down! I’m fine, I promise. There’s only a few more hours before close and the snow kept it quiet today. I promise I’ll head straight home and eat.”

“Remember, I’m opening the store tomorrow so I better not find you here early,” Jessica forewarned, pointing a threatening finger at the frail woman. “I swear, I’ll make you sleep in the break room.”

Shaking her head at Jess’s antics, Iris motioned toward the door. “Go home, Jess. I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”

She was given one more warning look before her new friend and old coworker disappeared out the door into the white flurries that had dominated the window most of the day. Supressing a yawn, Iris sat herself down at the main cash with some of the paperwork from the back office—she still had work that she needed to get done, even if she had to stay and help Sarah until closing.

The odd person or two would wander in throughout the day, making small or simple purchases that Iris handled easily and with little thought. Sarah kept up with cleaning and stocking to busy herself, giving Iris several assurances that she would take care of the aisles and to not worry. By the time the final hour rolled around, and it had been at least forty-five minutes since the last customer, Iris was tempted to send Sarah home early.

The shelves were spotless and there were no other boxes that needed to be put out, so there was nothing else for the young woman to do. Iris had even spent a good thirty minutes explaining to her how to run the computer programs that she used to manage all of the store’s books. Sarah just sat with a bewildered look on her face and they both decided that management was not something that she was interested in learning.

“It’s deserted today,” Iris finally declared, leaning against the counter as Sarah wandered by with a dusting rag. “You head on home, okay? I’ll stay and finish my paperwork and if someone does come by I can handle it.”

Sarah blinked at her owlishly. “Are you sure? I don’t mind staying!”

“There’s no point in both of us being bored out of our minds. Head on home, I’ll be fine.”

And then there was one.

Iris fought another yawn as she glanced at the computer screen. Just one more hour. Sitting back in her chair to rub at her tired eyes, the dark haired woman could feel them sting slightly with the effort she had been putting in to keep her eyes open.

She used to have no problem staying up for ungodly hours, but she’d been adjusting to a new way of living lately and now it seems going back to how things were would be impossible.

Sitting forward with a silent sigh, she tried to focus on the paperwork in front of her. Only a minute had gone by before her concentration was shattered, similar to the store window that exploded in a shower of glass as something was sent flying through it.

A shriek of surprise tore from her lips as Iris ducked behind the desk, too far for the object to reach but fear drawing the defensive reaction to the forefront. Her heart had rocketed into a galloping pace in her chest, hands shaking in fright against the edge of the counter. The roar of wind and the tinkling of glass hitting the once clean floors filled the silence of the store.

The rush of cold against her covered arms and bare neck made her shiver, skin already beginning to feel feverish from the sudden rush of adrenaline that flooded her system. Shivering and panting, Iris remained crouched and hidden as she waited and listened for any sign that the person who had broken the window might come inside.

However, even as time passed and nothing happened, she couldn’t bring herself to move. Trembling in fear and shivering from the cold, her hands gripped the desk above her head until her knuckles were white beneath her gloves. Eventually the distant sound of police sirens broke the silence, bringing her mind back to the present. She’d forgotten about the security system—if one of the doors were opened while the code was inputted, the police were alerted, but if a window was broken at any time the police were called immediately.

Trying to force her hands to relax on the edge of the desk, the sirens grew louder until the police cars came to a screeching halt outside of the store.

Taking in deep breaths of the cold air, Iris exhaled through trembling lips as she finally detached her hands from the desk. Shuffling out from her hiding place, she used the desk to support herself as she finally stood up and surveyed the damage. The front was a mess now, a combination of glass and snow covering the floor and surrounding displays.

The first thing that came to her mind was how the books were going to be ruined if they got snowed on.

“Police, don’t move!”

Iris jumped and choked back a gasp, hands shooting up as one of the officers stopped outside of the broken window. She was the only person visible in the store, so she could understand being suspicious.

“I’m the manager!” she shouted, her voice shaking. “My name is Iris Mayfair, my employers are Melissa and Gerald McIntosh. They would have been contacted as soon as the alarm was set off.”

“Please step out where I can see you, ma’am. Do you have ID on you?”

Walking around the desk on shaky legs, her hands still raised, Iris nodded. “My employee card; it’s with the keys around my wrist.” She shook her arm to demonstrate, causing the keys to jingle soundly and flash the little badge attached to it that had a barcode scanner for her to access the computers upon opening. Jess had one as well, for when she opened the store.

“Are you hurt?” the man asked as he stepped forward, some of the other officers entering behind him as they surveyed the damage and entered the store, checking through the aisles.

“No, I was behind the desk-”

“You have glass in your hair,” the officer interrupted gently once he had checked the ID on her wrist, comparing the information she had given to him with the name and photo on the card. Naturally, her hand lifted to her head to feel for the sharp projectiles. Thankfully, the officers caught her arm gently to stop her before she cut her hand. “No, don’t worry. It’s only a few pieces. Shake your head and they should fall right off.”

Iris did as instructed, shaking her head as she closed her eyes. She could feel when the fragments fell out, tapping down past her shoulders before they hit the already messy floor.

“Are you sure you’re not hurt?” the officers asked again—a glance at his shirt revealed his name was Montez—and Iris nodded her head dazedly. “Were you the only one working?”

Iris stood in the storefront with the officer as she answered his questions, giving him the time to write them down between answers. As the wind and snow continued to blow into the store, Iris steadily started to shiver more heavily. The adrenaline was bleeding from her system, causing her vision to blur in and out. Montez must have seen her sway on her feet because he abruptly stopped talking and reached out to claim her arm.

“Woah, let’s go sit you down. Is there a back office in this place? Somewhere warm?”

“Yes, just back down that aisle. There’s a door that leads to the stock-room at the end.”

The place was crawling with police by now, and one of them informed her and Montez that the owners were on their way down. There was a camera out front that might have caught the person who threw what turned out to be an old pipe through the window, but Iris didn’t have authorization to scroll back into the recorded footage so she was no help to them.

As they entered the back office to finish giving her statement, Iris found herself wishing that her soulmates were with her. Glancing at the nearest clock, she realized that they would be home by now and waiting for her to let them know that she was home safe.

Her shift had ended twenty minutes ago.

“Ma’am, are you alright?” Montez asked from across from her, worry clearly evident on his face as she trembled and stared blankly at the clock. “Is there someone you’d like me to call for you?”

Small and pale, Iris look like a terrified, small animal. The chair she was in made her appear that much smaller; her feet didn’t touch the floor and her boney frame was enveloped in the black leather of the chair-back. Montez felt like he was interviewing a terrified child. If she got any paler in her face, he’d be calling in the paramedics to check on her again. She looked on the verge of passing out.

The liquid gold of her eyes watered further as she gave a stuttered nod.

“Kevin Crumb,” she answered meekly. “His number is in my cellphone,” she answered, motioning to where she had left the phone on the office desk. She preferred not to have her cellphone with her when she was working, so she usually left it in the back office.

She was probably never going to do that again, not after what she had just experienced.

Montez nodded calmly, picking up the small phone and having her input the password before he stepped away. One of the other officers, a woman named Sinclair, came into the office briefly to inform Iris that her employers were here and she could leave once her statement was complete, they would help the police with anything else needed.

Iris just gave a short nod as she stared at the floor, yet to regain any colouring in her face.

Sinclair gave Montez a sympathetic look as she left, understanding that speaking to someone who was in shock could be a trying endeavor.

The ringing in his ear cut off, drawing his attention back to Iris’s phone. “Hey, Iris, you get home okay?” The casual question, filled with true concern, almost caused the officer to wince. He hated when he had to tell the unsuspecting spouse or loved one that something had happened. At least Iris appeared unhurt and he could offer that assurance.

“This is Officer Liam Montez; is this Kevin Crumb?”

There was a pause on the other end, silence filling the line for a long beat. “Where’s Iris?” the male voice demanded, upping in pitch as fear sharpened his words.

“Miss. Mayfair is fine; someone threw an item through the window of her store but she is safe and unharmed. It would be best if someone was with her right now, she’s in a bit of shock and will able to leave as soon as we finish getting her statement. She asked me to call you—are you able to come down to Pages of the World right now?”

“Yes, yea, I’m on my way. She’s alright? You said she wasn’t hurt?”

“She was far enough away that she only got a bit of glass in her hair, but no, she wasn’t hurt. I might recommend bringing her something warm, preferably tea or something that doesn’t have caffeine in it.”

“Can I talk to her, please? Just for a second?” the plea in the man’s words were impossible to ignore—Montez was certain, as he turned to hand the phone to Iris, that this was a soulmate he was dealing with.

Iris could barely hold onto the phone as she leaned her head heavily against the cellphone, into the pressure of Montez’s continued grip on the device. He was sure that she would have dropped it if he hadn’t helped hold it up. “Hello?” He couldn’t hear the man’s words, but Iris’s bow-tight body finally relaxed slightly at the sound of his voice.

Definitely soulmates.

“Hey, Sweetheart, it’s Barry. You okay? I’m on my way right now.”

“I don’t feel good,” Iris answered weakly, as though she was ashamed of her body’s reaction.

“That’s just the shock, Sweetheart. I’ll be there in ten, okay? Just try and take some deep breaths. Are you sitting down?”

“Mhm.” The conversation barely lasted a few seconds more before Iris suddenly dropped her hand, letting Montez pull the phone away. Glancing at the screen told him that the man had already ended the call, so he simply placed her phone on the desk as he reclaimed the other chair.

“Are you alright to continue?”

Swallowing thickly, Iris gave a tired nod as she met his eyes again.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 17 || The Absence of Fear

Words: 3000+

Warnings: None.

Previous || Next

~17~

Patricia had taken Iris out for groceries after the night she had spent sleeping beside her, stating that she did not care how small Iris was, she needed to eat more in order to be healthy. So, with a fully stocked kitchen and fridge, Iris had parted ways with Patricia after delaying the older woman with a long hug in the doorway of her apartment. Patricia didn’t seem to mind, and had just stroked Iris’s hair as she assured her that they would see one another soon.

Iris knew that she couldn’t be selfish—she couldn’t hold onto her soulmates all hours of the day because they had lives, too. She truly wished that she could; she wished that she never had to let them go.

However, she now had the thought that she could be with them much more; she had, after all, agreed to Patricia’s invitation about having a room made up for her. For her to think about such a drastic change in her life left her feeling old ghosts of panic, but it passed easily as she reminded herself of the comfort and security that came with having her soulmates nearby.

They had talked about it in more depth and Patricia made sure that she was fully aware they were not asking her to leave her apartment. They had no desire to rush her from her home, and only desired to offer her a safe place to sleep on nights when she felt her home wasn’t as safe as it used to be. She wasn’t sure when any of that may actually take place, since Patricia confessed that they had decided on it while she was sleeping, but knowing that it was a possibility in the near future was all she needed.

Standing in her kitchen as she finished the dinner she had picked out with Patricia, her plate scraped clean of any food, Iris looked at her laptop she had placed on the counter in order to read. She rarely used her laptop, not really liking the headaches that came from reading on the screen too much, but this seemed like a good time to bring it out.

On the first tab, information about apartments coming up for rent in her price-range, some saved or bookmarked to come back to at a later date, and the other tab held an article that Fletcher had released on Dissociative Identity Disorder. She knew that the soulmates she had met wouldn’t mind answering what questions she may have, but there were some things that she wanted to know going into a living situation.

Putting her dishes in the sink, filled a few inches with hot, soapy water, Iris picked up her laptop and half-filled mug of tea to take back to her bed and sit down. Crossing her legs and placing the computer in front of her, mug of tea in close reach on the nightstand, Iris returned her focus to the article.

This particular one was written only on the person with D.I.D., lacking anything to do with soulmates, and that was just what Iris was looking for. There wasn’t much information on soulmates of those with D.I.D. to begin with, so she didn’t concern herself too much with it and instead focused on studying the condition itself. She had tried to read other articles she had found, but they never seemed to portray the ‘subjects’ as people. Fletcher spoke of them as humans, and revealed that each identity was in fact their own person.

It wasn’t just someone hearing voices or showing signs of extreme bi-polar disorder; they were truly their own person, unique and different even if they all lived in one body.

Iris fully believed it, and not only because of the evidence provided by her soulmarks. It reminded her of the way each of her soulmates carried a different smell. Patricia had been wearing Barry’s clothes when she came to her, yet she smelled nothing like Barry except for the ghost of cologne that still clung to that material.

One of the things that irritated her with the other readings was also how they brought up treatments, explaining that the alters could be ‘cured’. They didn’t believe that alters were as real as the original identity and were all a part of a mental psychosis. That fact alone had her immediately abandoning those types of articles, always finding her way back to Fletcher’s work instead.

It was disappointing to know that there were so few people who supported Fletcher and her side of the research; from what Iris was reading, she had incredible evidence on her side. Yet she was forgotten in favour of others were went on about how these people could be ‘cured’ because they were sick. Knowing that Kevin had been through something terrible when he was younger, the exact reason that the alters existed, made Iris loathe those who said they were sick.

Kevin wasn’t sick, he was abused and afraid. She knew that feeling; she knew the desire to have something or someone there to protect you from the pain that was happening. The alters saved him, and they continue to protect him every day. You cannot cure fear. You cannot cure memories. You cannot cure a person from within a person. That would be like saying Barry, Luke, BT and Patricia were diseases.

Slamming her laptop closed and pushing it away from herself, Iris released a huff of frustration as she glared at the tiny computer. How dare they? How dare they think that they could ever understand what had happened to those who were abused, those who did all they could to protect themselves.

If anything, the people in the world with D.I.D were better than those without; their minds had done something that no one else thought possible in the past. They had literally become more in order to survive the circumstances which had created them.

“They don’t understand,” she muttered to herself, looking down at her arms to take in the visible marks along her forearms and hand. “They didn’t live through what we did.”

Clenching her marked hand into a fist, she pushed aside the irritation and anger that bubbled inside her chest in favour of focusing on those who she had met so far. There were still so many others there for Kevin—and for her, she was beginning to realize—that it warmed her heart. She wanted to know them all. She wanted to thank them all.

If the alters had not become who they were, there was a likely possibility that Kevin would not have survived to meet her.

For any of them to meet her.

Perhaps…she could help Dr. Fletcher.

These days, soulmarks made everything legitimate. If she were to let Fletcher use her and Kevin—with all twenty-three of his alters—as an example that would prove they were real, that the other identities really existed, maybe they could help others to open their eyes. It would be the most terrifying thing she would ever do, exposing herself to the world in such a manner, but it might just be the way of saving others like her and Kevin in the future.

Sighing as she leaned back into her pillows, head coming to rest on the headboard of her bed, Iris closed her eyes.

It wasn’t going to be an easy decision—she barely came up with the courage to talk with the older woman in the first place. Voluntarily putting herself into view of all those who hate someone like her?

Suddenly, her parents didn’t scare her quite as much.

What would the other people in the world think? She and her soulmates would be hated, hunted and possibly attacked for what they were; for being different. Because the world couldn’t stand those who were different—they didn’t understand them, they feared them, and wanted to remove that which caused so much confusion in their perfect lives.

Collecting her laptop from the bed and placing it safely back in her case, Iris then perched on the end of her bed as she tried to relieve herself of the anxiety building up in her chest. She never thought the day would come that she would be debating on exposing herself so openly to the public.

The ways meeting a soulmate—or soulmates—changed her never really seemed to end.

That was the excuse she used when she found herself standing outside of Karen Fletcher’s office the next day, tugging nervously on the sleeves of her winter jacket as her heart raced in her chest nervously. The older woman was understandably surprised when Iris asked if she could come and see her; stating that she wanted to help in any way she could to bring awareness to those with Dissociative Identity Disorder.

She was left to wait as Dr. Fletcher finished with her previous appointment; such was the curse of always showing up early to things.

The waiting gave her time to regret her decision, but she forced herself to remain where she was and do as she had placed her mind. Strong and sure. That is what her soulmates were making her become, someone who was strong and sure.

The door to Dr. Fletcher’s office opened and Iris respectfully kept her eyes on the window as she listened to the person quietly tell the doctor farewell. Soft heels tapped slowly down the stairs as the other client left, prompting Iris to look over her shoulder to where Fletcher was waiting with a faint smile on her lips. “Come in, Iris.”

Bowing her head in thanks, Iris slipped passed Fletcher and entered the familiar office while she slowly undid the buttons of her coat. “I…I wanted to apologize for how I ran out on you, Doctor. I just-”

“Oh, dear, there’s absolutely no reason for you to apologize to me!” Fletcher rushed to dismiss Iris’s concerns, waving her hands as she moved over to take the chair that she had occupied the last time Iris was there.

Draping her coat over the back of her chair, Iris ignored the glance she received from Fletcher when she exposed herself more than she had the previous visit. Her arms were still covered by longer sleeves, but she had removed the thick, protective barrier of her jacket. Settling into the chair with a faint sigh, Iris couldn’t quite bring herself to relax as she repeated “this is for them” over and over in her head. She was doing this for her soulmates; they were the ones who were thought to not exist.

“I want the world to know they’re real,” she began right away, lacing her fingers above her lap as she met Fletcher’s surprised gaze. “The alters; I want people to stop thinking that they can be ‘cured’ and removed from existence. I want to help people realize that the identities created are real people, just with a shared body.”

Fletcher’s aged face softened with a smile as she lifted a hand to press her fingertips against her lips. “I see that they have changed you, Iris.” Her comment made the younger woman blush, looking away. They had, it was clear to see, even if she hadn’t spoken a single word. “If you don’t mind me asking, how many have you met?”

“Four,” Iris answered. Fletcher knew how many alters there were in Kevin’s body, so she would also be aware of the number of soulmates that Iris had. “Barry, Luke, BT and Patricia.”

Fletcher’s eyebrows went up in surprise, sitting forward in her chair suddenly. “Patricia? How was that meeting? I understand that many people become…unsettled when it comes to meeting a woman in a man’s body.”

A small frown pinched Iris’s expression, but it faded quickly as she thought back to when she had woken up to Patricia at her door. “I was having a nightmare and the others could feel it—the more soulmates I meet, the stronger an emotional connection we have—and Patricia came over and woke me up when she knocked on the door. Having her there was very…comforting. I didn’t have any trouble with the fact that she was an alter in Kevin’s body.”

Fletcher’s smile returned, nodding her head gratefully. Iris truly was perfect as their soulmate.

“Are you sure you’re ready to help them? To do what must be done to help people understand?”

Iris bowed her head a moment, falling silent as she, yet again, considered the other woman’s questions. They were the same ones that she had been asking herself.

“I’ve spent so long being scared; looking over my shoulder and fearing every shadow. I don’t want to do this forever. And…reading up on Dissociative Identity Disorder showed me that they really don’t think that these alters are…real. They think that with therapy and pills they’ll just disappear and I hate the thought of that. But these soulmarks are one thing that they consider…strong. They indicate that these alters are real people.”

Fletcher relaxed back into her seat as she smiled softly at the young woman before her. “Look at you, Iris. You’ve changed.”

I know.

Seeing her begin to fidget, Fletcher was quick to stray from that particular direction of conversation. “If you decide to do this, is can be completely anonymous; no identifying information will be given out. Perhaps if you and the others sign over consent for other professionals to study your situation, but that is entirely up to you.”

“I haven’t spoken to the others about any of this, so I can’t give you an answer for them. However, if you can promise me that it will be anonymous, then I’ll do it.” She closed her eyes as soon as the words left her mouth, forcing herself not to go back on them now.

She was not afraid. She would not hide. This was the decision she had made, on her own and with her own reasons.

“I’m very proud of you, Iris,” Fletcher confessed as she smiled at the younger woman again. Her expression provided the truth to her words; she looked at Iris like a grandmother would, basking in the accomplishments of her family. “And you should be proud of yourself.”

“I am,” she admitted bashfully. “Terrified, but proud.”

Fletcher shuffled toward the edge of her seat, moving closer to Iris as she continued to smile softly. “Talk to them about this, I’m sure they will be happy to support you if this is truly what you want. They’ve been trying to find a way to prove that they are real for a long time. One of the most upsetting things for them is to hear that people don’t think they are alive—real people that can feel emotional pain from the words of others.”

Iris’s face pinched in pain, sorrowed to know that her soulmates were being hurt.

“Is there anything else you would like to speak about while you’re here?” Fletcher prompted gently.

However, as much as Iris had improved since meeting her soulmates, the prompt still had her immediately coiling in on herself like taut spring. “No, that’s alright. Maybe…in time, but not yet.”

Holding up a hand to stall the woman’s hesitant stumbled, Fletcher shook her head. “That’s perfectly fine, dear. I’m not here to push or force. Just know that if there is ever someone you need to talk to, and you don’t want to say it to your soulmates, I will happily lend an ear. Whether you want my opinion or not is up to you. If you just want to talk and let something off your chest, I am here.”

Letting out a long, slow exhale, Iris offered a shaky smile and nodded her head.

Rising to her feet, Iris made up her mind. “I’ll talk to the others first, but I’m sure you’ll be seeing me again soon,” she explained calmly, quietly, as she collected her coat back over her arm and turned to face Fletcher with a soft look in his whiskey eyes.

That look alone told Fletcher that things were changing, and they were for the better. This young woman, as fragile and broken as she was, had a strength inside of her that was necessary for the soulmate for twenty-three separate identities. It was a hidden, buried strength, but it was there all the same. The more time that passed after having met and reconciled with Barry, the more visible that strength became. “I hope to see you again soon, dear. Say hello to the others for me?”

Nodding her head with a peaceful smile, much better than the tense one that had been growing as they spoke, Iris turned for the door. “I will, Dr. Fletcher. Have a good day.”

Once Iris had departed, the older woman leaned back in her chair with a soft and thoughtful hum. If the others supported Iris and they were able to use the soulmarks shared between the two bodies, there was a possibility that favour could finally be tipped in their direction. However, that did not mean that it would not be a struggle for them—especially for Iris. As much as Fletcher thrilled at the thought of solid proof, finally, that others would struggle to argue…she did not want to damage the small woman further.

Proud as she was that Iris was refusing to let her fear rule her, Fletcher was deeply concerned that the fear is also what had kept her safe for so long. Even with her soulmates there, Iris would be in danger of a dark change in her life.

Glancing over to the chair that the young woman had vacated, she could only hope that this would not turn out to be a terrible mistake. As much as she wished to reveal to the world the truth behind all of her years of research, she did not want to do so at the expense of Iris’s happiness and safety, and that of her soulmates.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 15 || My Reason to Be

Words: 3000+

Warnings: Mentions of Violence

Previous || Next

~15~

Several days have passed since her father had left that note on her door and the message on her phone, yet she had not seen or heard from him since. It put her on edge, leaving her jittery and tense even as she tried to ease her concerns and to think positively about the situation. She should be relieved that he hadn't shown up, she knew that, but it made her wonder why he was waiting. Her father wasn't a patient man—at least not from what she remembered. When she'd disobeyed an order from him, the backlash was nearly instantaneous.

Now, buried beneath the heavy blankets atop her bed, Iris was not sleeping fitfully. Her knees were drawn up to her chest protectively, her muscles twitching and convulsing in her sleep as her eyes shifted beneath closed lids. Her lips did not form words, but faint whines and gasps of distress disrupted the silence of her small studio apartment. The faint buzz of her small heater was barely enough to cover the noises, quiet as they were, and left her to continue dreaming.

The nightmarish appearance of her parents, shouting incoherently as they towered over her like demonic giants, caused her to crawl backward into the darkest corner she could find. Her arm was hot with blood, the skin cut clean where her soulmark had once been. Her flesh was cut open, clean to the bone, and poured hot red blood as Iris desperately tried to pull the wound close, to seal her skin once more.

Her mark. They had ruined it.

Sobbing with her efforts, she wasn't aware enough before the knife was gliding across her skin again, this time at her right thigh, destroying another mark as her skin parted like silk beneath the knife. Throwing her head back with a shriek of pain, she no longer had anywhere left to move as the corner she had chosen for refuge closed in on her.

Sharp, strong knocking started at her door, waking her with a strangled gasp as Iris jerked into a half-sitting position. Her kitchen light was still on, giving her usually dark apartment enough light that she had been able to fall asleep in the first place. Her skin was hot and covered in a thin layer of sweat, leaving her hair to stick to her forehead and neck as she desperately clawed at her duvet as though scrambling for something to defend herself.

When the knocking at her door sounded again, Iris was able to bring herself into consciousness enough to realize that she was not huddled in a corner. Nor was she coated in a layer of her own blood, hot and sticky as it had poured from her split skin like a never-ending flood. She was in her dim apartment, sitting in sweat-soaked clothes as someone knocked at her door with sturdy knuckles.

Realizing through a fear and sleep addled mind that she had been having a terribly vivid nightmare, Iris jolted at the thought that she may have woken one of her neighbours. Choking back a sound of distress, the woman rolled from her bed and moved to her door as the knocking ceased for a moment. She didn't even think to look through the peep-hole as she slid the locks aside and pulled open the door with a stuttered apology on the tip of her tongue.

However, the words died away when she glanced up to meet familiar blue eyes, rimmed red and filled with fear as they looked down at her. Who stood before her, she did not know, but the sight of Kevin Cumb's body and whichever identity was presently in control caused a broken sob to wrack her chest as her tense shoulders dropped in relief and despair.

The fear in those blue eyes abated, but it was replaced with utmost concern as she was pulled into a tight embrace and silently ushered back into her apartment, letting her door close them inside and away from the prying eyes and ears of her woken neighbours. Her soulmate, wearing a thrown together outfit of black sleep pants, a pair of shoes and a soft maroon shirt that she knew was much too thin for the weather outside, had never looked more welcoming as she melted into their embrace.

"Sh, sh, shh, quiet now," a soft British accent cooed to her gently, guiding them to sit on the edge of her bed as one hand stroked through her nightmare-knotted hair. Iris could do barely more than hiccup harshly, eyes opening in surprise as the familiar, comforting words were finally whispered to her. "It's alright, little one, I'm here."

The tone, the words, the softness in which those words were spoken; this was a woman. A new soulmate had rushed over to her because she had been having a nightmare; the very soulmate whose mark had provided her with so much strength and courage; so much comfort when she was in her darkest times. She continued to shush Iris gently, pulling her in close as she rocked her from side to side as she carefully ran her fingers through her hair. With her cheek resting on her soulmate's shoulder, nose directed in toward her neck, Iris took in a shuddering breath as she fought to stop her sobs.

The smell was feminine and calming, like gentle perfume and home cooking.

Continuing to breathe in this new smell, Iris's sobs gradually eased as the knots were slowly pulled from her hair, the gentle voice in her ear never quieting with soothing words and calming hushes. "That's it, dear, deep breaths." She moved to pull back from Iris, lips parted to speak again, but the smaller of the two panicked as she felt her soulmate leaving her.

"Don't go," Iris gasped out desperately, sounding broken even to her own ears, "please, don't go!" Her hand snagged the shirt her soulmate wore, clinging to it desperately as she burrowed her face into a familiar neck, inhaling the new and comforting smell that rose from her skin.

Her soulmate sighed softly, sounding sad, as the arm around her shoulders tightened and the hand carding through her hair stopped to cradle the back of her skull and hold her close. "No need to worry, little one, I won't be going anywhere." She still trembled with the power of her ragged breaths, but Iris gradually relaxed into her soulmates comforting embrace.

"I'm sorry," Iris rasped out through raw vocal cords. She'd kept them awake again, and this time she'd been asleep when it had been happening. Her nightmare had been so real, so terrifying for her unconscious mind, that her soulmates felt it. "I never give you any peace."

"Oh, dear, don't think like that," she soothed, gently tipping Iris's head up so she could look into the soft, whiskey eyes that she had heard so much about from the others. They truly were a beautiful colour, but it was heartbreaking to see how glassy they were with tears, rimmed red and surrounded by bruised skin from lack of sleep. "When Kevin was young, we swore that we would protect him so that he, just like you, would not have to wake from fear in the middle of the night. Iris, you have our protection, as well."

Wrapping both arms around the thin woman, she tucked Iris's head beneath her chin and sighed softly when she felt that Iris was barely shaking now that her sobs have subsided.

"You, little one, have twenty-three people ready to do anything for you. You need only ask."

Taking a deep breath, Iris nodded her head against her soulmate's shoulder before she finally returned the embrace properly. It was mildly strange, hearing the soft tones of a woman as she hugged a distinctly male body, hardened with muscle and strength. However, nothing would stop Iris from opening her heart to her soulmates, no matter the gender.

Turning her face inward to once more rest against a pale, soft neck, Iris finally stopped trembling. "Thank you," she whispered, linking her hands behind the back of the woman holding her. The phantom fear from her nightmare still lingered in the back of her mind, but having someone that she knew she could trust helped to ground her, anchor her to the present. To reality.

She was safe, she wasn't alone, and her parents couldn't hurt her here.

"Patricia," the woman said suddenly. Iris drew away enough that her arms were still embracing a strong torso, but she was no longer hidden beneath her soulmate's chin. Looking up into calm blue eyes, a sweet smile was on her lips as she looked down into Iris's calmed ones. "My name is Patricia." So, this was the one who scolded Luke's eating habits. It was comforting to have finally met the personality behind the name, and Iris was so very happy that she had been determined enough so come here when she felt Iris's fear.

A smile brightened Iris's expression, making her look a tragic beauty with tears still staining her cheeks and caught in her dark eyelashes. "It's nice to meet you, Patricia," she answered softly, looking truly happy. "I…I've gotten so much comfort and strength from your mark over the years." Drawing her left arm from around Patricia, against her own chest instead, Iris showed the black writing on the back of her palm.

Patricia blinked in surprise. She had heard the others talking about their interactions with Iris, and how she often would trace the mark on the back of her hand in absentminded thought. However, she couldn't have imagined that it would be her words. Her words had given her soulmate so much just from being there; from being a constant and visible presence in her life. The surprise finally faded as she smiled once more, taking Iris's hand in hers and lifting it to press a kiss against the mark.

"I am honored, little one."

Iris flushed at the gentle action before she blinked in surprise as Patricia released her hand to instead move aside the collar of the maroon shirt that she was wearing, bearing the black mark that was Iris's begged words, don't leave, please, don't leave! Reaching up to gently trace over the mark, a sad smile touched her lips as she realized what they must have thought when they had first read it on their skin. It sounded like something Barry would have shouted to her as she was running away that first time.

Had they assumed they would try and leave her for some reason? Was that why they were all assuring her so adamantly that they had no intention of going anywhere?

Copying Patricia's action, Iris leaned forward and ghosted a gentle kiss against her words, dark against pale skin. Her soulmate sighed softly at the soft caress of Iris's lips as the feeling of being whole and accepted warmed her from the inside. So this was the soul bond?

Shifting back and angling herself to face Iris, Patricia reached up to gently trace a finger beneath one of Iris's tired eyes, feeling the softness of the skin that accompanied the bruise-like appearance. "How are you feeling now, dear?"

Looking away as she inhaled deeply, Iris knew the immediate answer would be that she felt much better now that she was no longer alone. However, the more in depth answer to Patricia's question was that she felt drained and afraid, still left in a state of unknowing when it came to her parents. She really had no clue why they had showed up and ordered her like they had years before, then vanished again with no further contact.

"I'm scared," she finally answered quietly. Her crying had left her mouth dry and her throat raw, leaving her to sound as though she truly had been caught in fits of screaming as she slept. "Were you told about my parents?"

Patricia's expression darkened slightly—the popular reaction when her parents were brought up to any of her soulmates, it would seem—and she nodded slightly. "Barry didn't go into detail, he felt it was up to you when your secrets were to be told, but we all are aware that you had been…abused, and Dr. Fletcher assumed it was you parents."

"Yes to both," Iris admitted quietly. "They're back…my parents. My father left me a note and a voicemail message, telling me to hide my marks. But…I decided to do the opposite." Patricia watched as, even now, Iris began to stroke her finger over the mark on her hand while she was speaking. "And he hasn't done anything, which scares me almost as much as if he had. He was never a patient man in the past, so I don't know why he showed up once and then just disappeared."

"Waiting is one of the hardest things," Patricia offered in response as she nodded along. She didn't know what else they could do to help Iris—the next move was up to her parents—and that left Patricia feeling just as helpless as she was sure that Iris did. But they weren't after her or the other alters, they were after Iris and that fact alone had everyone on edge. "Do you think you can sleep anymore?"

Iris shook her head without even having to think about it. Closing her eyes just brought back the images of trying to pull together her sliced skin, blood pouring out in unrealistic quantities. She swore she could still feel the sensation of her fingers sliding over the edges of the cut, trying desperately to pull it closed but the blood leaving her skin too slick to pull.

"Do you want to talk about your nightmare?" Patricia proposed instead, leaning into Iris's line of sight when she saw the troubled look was returning to her soulmate's gaze. "Hedwig always feels better after he tells me about bad dreams."

Hedwig. Another familiar name that went with a soulmate she was yet to meet. Her suspicions that Hedwig was a child continued to grow.

Scooting back along her bed, toward the pillows that were pushed and strewn in disarray from her restless movements, Iris pulled Patricia up with her so that both women were sitting back against the headboard, their hands intertwined between them. "It wasn't just a dream, not really. It was my parents, and they were cutting my marks."

Patricia tensed at her confession, tightening her grip on Iris's small, delicate hands as her words register. "What do you mean it wasn't just a dream, dear?" Even her words sounded forced.

Iris locked up for a moment, tensing her lips into a thin line. Patricia didn't know? Letting out a shuddering breath, she disentangled one of her hands and rotated her arm to bring her attention to the words on the outside of her forearm. The distraught sound that issued from Patricia's chest drew Iris's gaze up in surprise; tears welled in her blue eyes, a pinched, pained expression marring her features. She took Iris's arm in a gentle hold, running her fingertips along the scar that had been sewn together so dutifully.

Her parents had probably hated the doctor that helped her when he had preserved the words.

"Oh, little one," Patricia breathed out in despair. "Please, tell me this is the only one?"

Iris bowed her head, wishing that she could give Patricia that assurance. "No, it's not," she whispered sadly. "It's what I was dreaming about, before you woke up when you knocked. They were cutting my marks again, like when I was younger."

Patricia could only shake her head as she continued to stare at the scar as though wishing it would disappear. "How could anyone do this to a child?"

"I have asked myself that many times."

Pulling her small, fragile soulmate in close, Patricia hardened her resolve as her arms wrapped tightly around Iris's frame. "They will never touch you again," she swore, her soft tone strong and sure as she let Iris lean into her in comfort. "They will never even come close."

Neither of them moved, curled together amongst Iris's sheets and duvet. Patricia began telling her stories; tales of the things that the many identities in Kevin Crumb's body got into over the years, all to distract the younger woman from her dreams, from her life. Very soon, Iris was laughing softly as she listened to Patricia's take on the story she already knew about BT nearly breaking his nose. She told her about the ongoing things that happened in their home, and how often Hedwig was the troublemaker in a group of adults that were not amused by his pranks.

Patricia already knew that Iris did not have work that day, courtesy of Barry, and therefore felt no guilt as she watched Iris steadily fall back asleep as the barest hint of sunlight began to creep in though her windows. She continued to talk, however, in soft, lilting tones that worked to lull Iris deeper into her sleep—hopefully without nightmares.

Only once Iris had gone completely slack against her, leaning their sides together as her head rested on Patricia's shoulder, did the other woman stop regaling her sleeping soulmate with stories. Looking down at her, it broke Patricia's heart to know the extent of her soulmate's pain—and she had a disturbing feeling that it wasn't the full extent, not yet.

Closing her eyes and relaxing beneath Iris's weight, she let herself slip from the light as she soon opened her eyes to where Barry was sitting. Arms crossed with a troubled look, he didn't appear the usual Barry as he frowned deeply at the floor. Looking up only when Patricia came to sit next to him in an empty seat, he knew as soon as he met her gaze that she had been told about Iris's past—at least a fraction of it.

"We need to get her out of there," she began. "Alone and scared; it's no way to leave her."

"I know," Barry admitted tiredly, straightening from his slouch and scrubbing at his face with weary hands. "But what can we do? We don't have much room here; we barely have enough room for all of us."

"We only have on body, Barry," Patricia answered honestly. "She doesn't need much room—you've seen her home—but she does need our protection. Even without her parents here, they are haunting her. What good would we be if they actually tried to hurt her? We're across town."

"Would she do it?" Barry asked in response, sounding as tired as he looked.

"I think she will," BT answered as he stepped up to them, his hands tucked into the pockets of his jeans as he looked down at them with a pained expression. "She's never been wanted before. She's only ever been pushed away by people who were supposed to want her—to love her. Maybe…maybe this will prove to her that we are all in. We won't leave her."

Barry looked up to the younger man before he smiled faintly and let out a small huff as his shoulders relaxed. "Do you really think she'll just move in with us?"

"Not right away," Patricia answered. "But we can make a space for her at home, so that she's not alone all the time. I'm not proposing we take her from her home and make her give up her apartment, but I want to offer her a sanctuary. Somewhere her parents won't find her when she wants to sleep in peace."

"The note on her door tells us that her dad can get into her building," BT continued. "I'm with Patricia on this one."

Barry quirked an eyebrow, not having expected BT to so readily agree with the older woman, but he also knew that BT posed a very valid point. Iris was broken from the rejection and abuse of her parents, and offering her a place amongst them—the greatest show of faith for a group that had been ridiculed before—may just be the necessary step toward piecing her back together.

BT suddenly grinned. "I think you'll be hard-pressed to find anyone that wouldn't want her around."

"Amen," Luke called from his chair, throwing a fist in the air. Even Dennis came to stand just behind Patricia, placing a hand on her shoulder as he met Barry's gaze and nodded. The most they could do was offer the chance to her; after that, it was in her hands.

"She's ours," Dennis added. "If she'll take us. And we protect our own."

Leaning his elbows on his thighs, Barry looked over the many faces that made up their circle of identities. Some slept, others were nodding their agreement to the conversation that had woken them, and the remaining ones wore sad, pained expressions as they remembered the pain of Iris's nightmarish memories. Across the space, Kevin was sleeping fitfully in his chair with Hedwig snoring next to him. "If she'll take us," he agreed quietly.

Patricia smiled.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 14 || Small Wonders

Warnings: None

Words: 3000

Previous || Next

~14~

Iris was blissfully distracted for most of the day, running between the front counter and the back door as the first of several shipments arrived. Jessica, Chris and Alexandra were the main workers with her that day, and she was so thankful to have at least one guy since majority of the boxes weighed more than Iris’s total body weight. Alex had been the only one to really react when she’d spotted Iris’s soulmark on the back of her hand, but Jessica had been quick to shoo her away. Her work gloves had been pulled on after that, since they would be dealing with boxes and books and Iris would rather go without any unnecessary cuts than prove a point to her parents.

Alex had even shown up later on, looking thoroughly chastised, and apologized for her reaction to Iris’s mark. When she’d glanced into the aisles, she’d spotted Jessica watching Alex with an intense stare and was overwhelmed with gratitude toward the other woman.

“Have a great day,” Iris called as she waved to a mother and son on their way to the exit, “Hope to see you soon!” The mother turned back with a smile as her son darted outside to show his father his new book, cheering about superheroes.

“Finally quieting down?” Jessica called from her place on a ladder, neatly organizing the new displays that they were putting up around the front entrance and registers. “Of course the busiest day we have in a month is the same day we get a huge shipment.”

“Fate plays cruel games,” Chris teased from the other side of the shelf, out of view but still clearly heard due to the natural strength and volume of his voice. “At least you two are almost done!”

Iris shook her head with a smile as she resumed scanning through the new books and inputting them into the system, or recording the increased number for the items they already had. “You’re the one who never wants to do the opening shift because you’d rather sleep in,” she called back, getting a snort from Jessica as the woman got off her ladder to move on to the lower shelf.

“Hey, I am a night owl, okay? I work better when it’s dark.”

“It is dark when we get here,” Jessica snapped back. “And Iris usually beats me by half an hour most days.”

Pushing the finished box aside for Alex to pick up when she finished organizing free space on the shelves, Iris grinned into her work. “Are you guys still jealous of the perks of being a manager?”

“No,” the chimed in simultaneously, with Chris poking his head around the shelf.

“Thought so,” Iris mumbled smartly while carefully slicing her x-acto knife through the tape atop a new box, parting the folds of cardboard while dialing the blade back so she didn’t cut herself when slipping the knife into her pocket. “Alex, new box for you!”

“Jeez, slow down!” Alex called from deeper in the store, before she rounded the shelves with a tired expression. “Give some to Chris, would ya?”

“These are for your section,” Iris explained with a grin, pushing the finished box closer to Alex’s approaching form. “And it’s a small box, see?”

Sighed in withheld complaint, Alex hefted the new box into her arms and turned back to her own work as the bell over the door chimed with a new customer. Iris called her usual greeting as she looked up to the older man that entered, walking carefully with a cane as he smiled back. “I’m hoping you sell journals; my granddaughter’s birthday is coming up and she has about a dozen of those things.”

Smiling at the man’s thoughtfulness, Iris pointing down the far aisle that had ‘Journals, Sketchbooks, Creative Paper’ hanging at the front. “You can find all you’re looking for down aisle one, and we even have an assortment of pens and other writing utensils she might like. They’re at the back wall at the very end of the aisle.”

The man thanked her happily before he disappeared around the shelves, leaving the three coworkers alone at the front once more.

Jessica descended from her ladder and commenced with cutting the bottom of her empty box open as she approached Iris’s busy form. “Hey, how are you feeling?” she asked quietly, not wanting to draw Chris’s attention. He already knew that there had been something from yesterday; being a guy, he unofficially assumed the responsibility of keeping everyone safe, and had been informed that someone had caused trouble for the morning shift.

“It’s nice to keep busy,” she answered honestly, looking up from her screen. “Hey, I forgot to ask earlier but do you want to walk home together today?” Jessica’s face pinched slightly in discomfort, not wanting to turn Iris down—the whiskey eyed woman already knew her answer from that expression alone. “You have plans,” she guessed.

“Yeah, I’m sorry.”

“That’s fine, I just wanted to ask in case you were free.”

“I can cancel-”

Shaking her head, Iris held up her hand to interrupt. “Don’t you dare. Honestly, it’s fine. It’s still broad daylight, and I’m a grown woman; walked home alone many times before.”

Jessica was still frowning, but nodded her head as she folded her flattened box awkwardly. “If you’re sure…”

With only a half an hour left on their shift, Iris and Jessica both worked quickly to get through the rest of their work, arranging for the others to take over once they’d left. Chris gladly came to the counter to take over Iris’s work, while Alex relieved Jessica of her display work. Sarah was going to be arriving to help with the evening shift as well, so Iris wasn’t so worried about the work load. Jessica continued to give her worried glances as they were preparing to leave in the breakroom, but she didn’t say a thing more about Iris walking home.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?

“Yea, have a good evening,” Jessica answered quietly, offering a small smile as Iris pulled her bag over her shoulder and left the younger woman to herself. Waving to Chris as she passed the front counter, Sarah was just arriving at the front entrance and happily held the door open for her.

“Have a good evening, Iris!” Sarah called happily as Iris stepped out into the chilly air, waving at the other woman over her shoulder before she turned her attention to the sidewalk before her.

For once, she was relieved that the streets were filled with people as she made her way into the thick of the crowd. Most people were finishing their own jobs for the day, making it the perfect time for Iris to blend in with everyone else. However, that didn’t stop her from darting her attention between the faces around her, desperately hoping that neither of her parents showed up in the midst of everyone.

Adjusting her bag and slipping her hand into her pockets, Iris did her best to try and relax her muscles. The business of the store had kept her distracted throughout the day, which also helped her to forget just how tired she was. Her back and shoulders ached from sitting up all night, and her head was throbbing faintly with an oncoming headache. It made her worry that she was distracting Barry at work, but she knew that there was nothing she could do about it until she got home.

A warm tea and a thick blanket were in her future, and she sighed softly against the cold air at the thought.

Darting from the path of someone else rushing passed her, Iris couldn’t help the abrupt lock of her muscles from momentary fear.

This was not how she wanted to live! She had left that life behind years ago, taking hold of her own fate when she decided that she could rather face the streets than her own family. The decision to live how she wanted, even now with the return of her parents, was something she was not going to give up.

However, making the decision to no longer fear them and to actually stop being afraid were two very different things. As much as she wished she could mentally will away her fears, it was going to take much more than that. She knew that it was at least a start. Going out in public, seeing men who somewhat resembled her father, showing her marks; she wanted the chance to live through things without the same paralyzing fear that was with her now.

Swallowing against the sudden dryness in her mouth, Iris shook her shoulders gently to relieve some of the tension that was causing them to ache.

Arriving at her building a few minutes later, Iris tried not to tense up again after having remained at ease for majority of her walk home. However, the reminder of what she had come home to the day before caused her heart to speed up suddenly and her hands began to sweat. Taking the stairs more slowly than usual, she dreaded what she might find on her door.

Pushing open the stairwell exit, Iris nervously glanced up and down the hallway, coming up with an empty corridor.

Once she was sure that there was no one else around, especially her father, Iris stepped toward her apartment door and sighed with relief to see that there was no note taped in place. Unlocking her door and slipping inside as her body sagged with relief, Iris couldn’t help but to feel the overwhelming urge to cry.

She tried to be brave, she tried to fight this, but facing her greatest fear wasn’t without its struggles.

Inhaling deeply to calm herself, she shrugged off her coat gently and placed her cellphone on her bed as she toed off her boots. Hanging the garment up carefully, making sure that the buttons were done up to keep the coat in good shape, Iris snatched her cellphone up as she moved to the kitchen to heat some water for the tea she had been fantasizing about.

Pulling up her email once it was on the stove burner, Iris quickly messaged Barry with assurance that she was home and nothing eventful had happened throughout the day. She also made sure to tell him not to worry if she did not reply to him later on, since she was intending to go to sleep once she’d eaten something.

At least she knew that if her night was uneventful, Barry and the others would get a full night of sleep as well. “My fault,” she muttered quietly.

Another email was sent to BT, thanking him for telling Barry what she could not.

She wasn’t sure how she would have felt throughout the day if Barry hadn’t been there to make her feel more confident in her decision that morning. Watching the beginning wisps of steam coming from the spout of the kettle, Iris thought back to her morning walk to work. He’d been a solid and warm assurance, soothing her doubts and livening her tired, dulled mind.

Ducking her head and placing her fingers to her lips, Iris pressed down a smile as she thought of Barry’s lips almost ghosting hers. He’d caught the corner of her mouth, by accident she knew, and the thought of it made her tingle with a new, foreign excitement.

It wasn’t a kiss. Not exactly. Yet it made her flush in happiness and her heart was dancing in her chest, pounding out a rhythm that she found she didn’t mind one bit. Before she had met Barry, the only thing to make her heart race was fear, but now he was giving her new reasons to feel dizzy and warm, flushed with happiness instead of shame.

Making her tea and leaving it to steep on the counter, Iris plugged in her phone to charge as she selected a pair of warm, comfortable sleep pants and large sweater to wear. Brushing her hair and tying it out of her face, Iris began the usual routine of preparing to settle down for the night. She knew she still needed to eat, but she wanted to just lie down and enjoy her tea with a good book.

The temptation of a shower was very pressing, but she’s already had one that morning and knew that she needed to resist.

Pulling her sleeves up to her elbows and grabbing the thick throw that she’d stashed in her closet, Iris paused as she looked at the scarred, damaged mark along her forearm. Even Jessica had reacted when she’d seen it, not even needing to ask what caused just a scar as she taken a count of the marks covering Iris’s arms. She’d only seen seven of the twenty-three—almost twenty four—and she’d still reacted like someone had committed the worst sin before her eyes.

Placing the throw on her bed and gently caressing the scar, Iris pondered the words. He’s told us about you, little one, he really likes you. It seemed that her soulmates favoured pet-names and nicknames to call her: Sweetheart, sweetie, doll, dear, little one. The simple endearments made her smile; it surprised her that she rather liked them. They made her feel welcomed and wanted.

Collecting her tea and the book she was presently reading, Iris curled herself against her pillows and wrapped the throw tight around her body—making sure to cover her chilled feet.

It was simple and mundane; something she’d done before she’d met Barry—before she’d even considered looking into people who might know why she has so many marks. When times were, at least what she might have considered, simpler. However, the more she spent time with her soulmates, the more of them that she met, the happier she was to have gone to Karen Fletcher’s office that day.

Slipping into the comfort of her novel, Iris let herself forget about the day as her headache steadily subsided, the smell of peppermint and green tea encasing her tenses as her mind becomes lost in a fictitious world.

Across town, Barry sighed in relief as he stood in front of his work locker, looking down at his phone. He wasn’t allowed to have it on him during meetings, so he’d nearly run back to the locker room to check for Iris’s email about getting home safely. Thankfully, she’d sent him an email as soon as she had returned home, thanking him for that morning while assuring him that she was home and safe. He answered her email quickly, even though she warned that she may not answer due to being asleep, and tucked his phone into his pocket.

He still had an hour left before he got to leave, but it was be a much easier hour now that he knew his soulmate was safe and her father had tried anything.

“Hey, Barry!”

Turning to one of the handlers, Barry nodded in greeting with a smile as he closed his locker and clipped the small lock in place again. “Hey, Alice, what can I help you with?”

“We’re pretty sure some kids cut some of the locks near the back gate, probably to try and sneak in later tonight. Tom found them when he was doing his rounds before heading home. You got time to replace them?”

Barry let out a soft sigh. He hated when people did that. The animals weren’t these adorable things that they could just walk up to whenever they wanted; that’s the reason for all of the thousands of yards of fencing that surrounding the park and each enclosure, doubled. “Yea, no problem. You heading home?”

“Yup, I’m free for the night!” she cheered, passing him to get to her own locker. “Hey, you doing anything later?” she asked suddenly, the words rushed as she spun on her heel to face him again, looking embarrassed.

Barry jerked to a halt and turned to face her again.

What?

He’d worked with Alice for years, and she’d never really given him the time of day. Not that he’d been looking; he and the others decided a long time ago that they were going to wait for their soulmate, and not waste time with someone who wasn’t meant for them. And now, after he’d met her, Alice decided to try and ask him out?

“Uh…yea, I was gunna go and visit my soulmate,” he answered slowly, deciding at the last second that calling Iris his girlfriend wasn’t true, and calling her his soulmate was much more honest and meaningful anyway. He knew that he probably wouldn’t see Iris that night, but it would give Alice a clear idea of his relationship.

Alice’s expression went slack in surprise before she clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh my God, I’m sorry! I didn’t know!”

Barry smiled in assurance and waved away her concerns. “That’s okay, I don’t exactly broadcast it.” Alice flushed in embarrassment as she nodded her head. “Have a good night, Alice.”

“Yea, you too, Barry,” she called after him, before silently cursing herself as she banged her head against her locker once he was out of sight. Barry flinched once he had turned the corner, feeling bad when he knew she’d be embarrassed about asking him out now. However, he couldn’t bring himself to regret what he had said to her. He could never pass Iris up for another—his soulmate would come before anyone else, not matter how kind they might be.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 13 || Let the Morning Keep Our Secrets

Warnings: Mentions of Abuse, Mentions of Violence

Words: 3300+

Previous || Next

~13~

Barry did as promised and walked Iris all the way to her work; unfortunately, she wasn’t allowed to let him inside since the store didn’t officially open for another hour, so they had to say their goodbyes as they stood outside the back entrance to the building. Iris already had her work keys in hand, the jingling of metal the only sound in the empty alleyway. He hadn’t let her go since they’d linked arms, Iris only moved her arm when the chill had gotten to her fingers. Instead of letting her pull away, though, Barry had lifted his other hand and placed it over hers to protect it from the chill.

“I work late tonight,” he started, sounding almost guilty for the way his schedule had been put. “I can’t…”

“Don’t worry,” Iris assured immediately, stepping away from him so they were face to face as her hand moved down to link their fingers loosely. “Jessica and I finish at the same time today and she lives a street down from where I live; I’ll ask her to walk home with me.”

Barry relaxed and offered a relieved smile, squeezing her warmed fingers while simultaneously pulling her in closer. It was becoming second nature to her, willingly stepping in against that body—it didn’t matter which soulmate it was, even if the body were to change with each one, the comfort was the same.

Barry’s lips came to rest against her forehead again, bringing a butterfly sensation to Iris’s stomach as she fought against a grin of unabashed happiness. “You’re okay for your meeting, right? Please tell me you got some sleep.” She sincerely hoped that this wasn’t going to happen on a regular basis; the guilt of taking the night from Barry and the others would absolutely eat away at her.

“I’m just fine, Sweetheart,” he soothed, using his free hand to stroke her hair gently. “I’ll get some coffee on my way over, everything’ll work out. Plus, I get tomorrow off so I’ll catch up on some sleep then.”

Nodding along, Iris tried to push aside her guilt as she glanced to the metal door that made up the back entrance of the store. “I need to clock in soon, so I should be getting inside.” Glancing down at the keys in her free hand, she fiddled with them a moment to get the correct key between her fingers. There was only one deadbolt on the door itself, but there was also an alarm system that would go off if the correct code wasn’t inputted within thirty seconds of opening the door.

“Remember; call me if anythinghappens,” Barry pressed, looking down at the adorable expression of focus on Iris’s face as she tried to select the right key without dropping the entire thing, all with one hand since her other was still linked with his in a warm, assuring hold.

Unable to resist one more chance, Barry leaned forward to kiss her cheek goodbye. Iris, unaware of his intention, turned her head to answer his comment in the same moment. His lips skimmed her cheek from the action, brushing against the corner of her mouth in the process. Her heart immediately sped up at the contact, causing heat to rise to her cheeks as a blush bloomed under her skin in response. Both of them pulled back suddenly, not having expected for either of their innocent actions to lead to an almost-kiss.

Barry looked ready to apologize, afraid that she would think something terrible of him—as much as the thought of kissing her was deeply appealing, he knew that someone as afraid and damaged as Iris would need time. And he was going to give her as long as she needed. However, she didn’t look afraid or panicked; she looked flustered. Blushing and holding her breath, her lips were parted just slightly in shock as she looked up at him with an unreadable expression.

So, instead of apologizing, an amused smile quirked at his lips. “That blush is adorable,” he teased gently.

Iris gasped slightly before she pursed her lips to hide her own smile. “I-I have work!” she declared suddenly, cursing herself for stuttering as she turned back to the door again.

Barry didn’t let her get away that easily, however, and use their linked hands to pull her back to him as he kissed her temple as he had intended, his other hand cradling her head gently. She was so small, her cheek and jaw fit perfectly into the cradle of his hand, palm warm against her chilled cheek. “Have a good day, Sweetheart. Let me know what you’re home safe?”

Her blushing cheeks burned as she promised to text him the second she was safely in her apartment. Barry finally released her and stood waiting as she unlocked the door before disappearing quickly inside with one final flash of a smile over her shoulder. The metal door fell between them with a resounding slam, the deadbolt sliding back into place and then the back alley was silent.

Releasing a breath to try and calm his racing heart, Barry closed his eyes and ducked his head as his hand came up to cover his mouth. He hadn’t intended for any of that to happen, but there was no way he was going to regret it. The softness of her skin was branded into his mind, leaving him short of breath as he tried not to think too hard on it.

When BT’s discomfort had been brought to their attention the previous night, all of the alters were left on edge. They may not have been the one in control, but to have something so obviously wrong left each of them in discomfort. They’d each done their research on soulmates and the bonds shared between them. In the case of multiples, the bond was usually stronger because of the many connections weaving and interlacing between several people.

Their situation was slightly different, since they were more than just a three-way or four-way soulbond—they were not bonded to one another, only to Iris and Iris to them. However, seeing as they did share one body, with Iris’s many words covering the expanse of that body, the connection was more than likely just as strong. She has only met three of them. That would mean that their bond was three times as strong as someone with only one mark.

Her panic and fear had come through like a deep, uncomfortable feeling of forbidding to them. Fear and doubt sitting in their gut like poison all through the night.

She hadn’t slept at all. He knew that; he’d known even before seeing her face. There was no way that the discomfort could have lasted through the night if she had slept; with sleep would have come even just a small amount of peace for her. That never came; he and the others would have felt it. Iris wasn’t one to cover her face with makeup, either, so the shadows beneath her eyes and unhealthy pallor of her skin confirmed his fears as soon as he’d seen her leave her apartment building.

Turning away from the back door of her work, Barry made his way onto the main sidewalk once more, passing by the front window as he did so. Iris was nowhere to be seen, but he could see some lights on in the depths of darkness that made up the bookstore so early in the morning.

He wouldn’t let this happen again. None of them would.

He’d been surprised that he was able to keep hold of the light after BT had passed it along to him. Dennis especially had been on edge, sitting more rigidly in his chair than Barry had seen in quite a while. He’d always been the one to take over when things were happening to Kevin, keeping their original identity safe and therefore assuming the role of protector over not only Kevin, but all of them.

The thought of Iris being in fear or in danger brought up the protective instincts like never before, and Barry had kept a careful eye on the shadowy form of Dennis while as he glared deeply at the floor in the center of their circle of chairs. Back straight, legs slightly splayed and arms crossed firmly across his chest, he looked a dangerous mix of patient and ready to spring up at any moment.

Sighing softly as he turned at a street corner, Barry knew that he needed to do something before Dennis did the same as BT and took off after Iris one day.

With her parents back in the picture, however, he knew that it was going to be nearly impossible to stop all of the alters from going against his orders.

Glancing back in the direction he had come, Barry silently wished for Iris’s day to go on uninterrupted and safely boring.

Inside the store, Iris was humming to herself as she set up the register and double-checked who was going to be coming in at what time that day. She also sent out several emails to confirm shipments times and dates, her fingers flying skillfully over the keys as her lips mouthed the words that she was typing, all while she musically calmed herself and tried to distract against the terrifying silence of the store.

Hitting send on the last email, Iris had only just reached for her phone to check for any messages when it started to ring and Jessica’s name popped up.

“Good morning,” she greeted, trying not to sound too tired. She was already slouching down in her seat, ruining her posture but just too fatigued to do much about it.

“Hey, I’m at the back door. You already in?”

“Yea, just one sec and I’ll let you in.”

Jessica chirped a happy response before hanging up, letting Iris put her phone down and log out of the company email. Pushing back from the desk in the back office, she hurried back to the door that she had entered through shortly before and slid the deadlock aside to push the heavy metal open. Jessica was huddled into her too-thin spring jacket as she smiled at Iris in greeting, cheeks reddened from her walk over.

“Morning!” she breathed out, hurrying into the warm building as she shook out her chilled limbs. “Jeez, I wasn’t expecting it to be so cold today!”

“Why on earth are you wearing such a thin jacket?” Iris responded, shaking her head. “It’s not that close to summer! There was snow on the ground just the other week, remember?”

Peeling her jacket off as they made their way back into the store, heading for the breakroom, Jessica laughed at Iris’s scolding, motherly tone. “Yea, mom, I know. I just hate the feeling of my winter coat, it’s so huge. And by the time we get off work it’s warm enough to not even need a jacket anymore.” Hanging her coat and bag in her locker, she gave Iris the side-eye as she continued. “Us normal people, at least. You’re always bundled up so tight I worry you’ll get heat stroke!”

Huffing at the younger woman’s tone, Iris leaned against the doorframe as she crossed her arms over her chest. Jessica’s eyes darted down to her hand briefly, showing her amazing restraint when she didn’t stare openly at the back of her pale hand, black writing on full display. Iris had forgone her usual work gloves, not actually needing them while she was only typing out some emails and arranging the register at the front.

“I’ve gotten used to it. I think if I wore sleeveless shirts now I’d freeze to death.”

It wasn’t really a lie, either. Her parents had always had her in long-sleeved tops since her first arm mark had popped up when she was a kid. They’d even use band-aids and semi-permanent make-up on the back of her hand. She’d spent so long with her skin covered; heat no longer bothered her like it once had. However, she’d had the unfortunate experience of passing out from heat-stroke a few times before that had happened. When the school brought up their concerns, they’d always spin it around on her. She just wouldn’t leave the house without it!

Jessica stilled as she pocketed her work knife and marker, easily accessible from the back pocket of her jeans. “Iris…are you hiding soulmarks?” she finally posed in a quiet, hesitant voice while fidgeting with her shirt hem.

There is was; the question she’d been waiting for.

Iris’s expression didn’t change as she met Jessica’s worried eyes. She didn’t confirm, but she didn’t deny, either. Holding one another’s gazes across the space of the small breakroom, Jessica knew the answer to her question without Iris having to speak a word or flash an emotion.

“I have two, you know?” she continued after the silence stretched on with no sign of her manager deciding to answer. Iris blinked at the woman’s confession, eyebrows rising slightly in a show of surprise. “One’s on my leg, so it’s always covered by my pants. The other’s on my left side, near my pants. People sometimes see that one, but they’re both pretty easy to just live life without people asking.” Switching out her shoes as she spoke, Iris did nothing more than stand back as she listened to her coworkers words.

Glancing down at her hand, Iris wasn’t exactly sure how to take the other woman’s confession.

“I can’t really speak from experience about having people know that I’m part of a triad, but those that do know don’t judge. And they make up for the ones that do.”

Iris sighed softly as she changed her posture to lean her back fully against the wall as her fingers carded nervously through her hair. “It’s not that easy.”

Nodding in understanding, Jessica remained sitting on the bench located in front of the lockers. “I know. But there’s always somewhere to begin, you know? I hadn’t met either of them yet, but I know that my friends are gunna be there for me when I do.”

The florescent lights caught Iris’s eyes as she looked up again, making them look amber in the artificial light. “It’s not that easy,” she repeated quietly, before pulling up the sleeve of her over-shirt. The first thing that Jessica saw was the long scar running through the mark along the outside of her arm. Her breath hitched at the sight, before she began counting. Wrist, outer arm, inner arm, back palm.

Four?

No.

Iris didn’t stop. She pulled up the sleeve of her other arm as well, showing an additional two marks on her right forearm, also in different writing to show Jessica that there were at least six different soulmates for Iris. Another mark was then revealed on her bicep, winding around the thinly muscled upper arm. Seven. Jessica was left staring in awe at her friend’s bared skin, stark white from lack of sun exposure and divided by the different clusters of black writing.

“See?” Iris asked quietly, holding out her arms as example. “Not that easy.”

“Oh, Iris,” Jessica breathed softly, finally understanding the way that the woman carried herself. “I’m so sorry.”

Shaking her head, the brunette pulled her shirt-sleeves down to cover her bare arms up again, hiding the writing from Jessica’s shocked eyes. “My parents are unmarked. I was never allowed to show them—it’s a hard habit to break.”

Swallowing thickly as she bowed her head, Jessica was suddenly so grateful to only have two marks. Her parents only had one another, but they at least had a soulmark that helped them to look passed their daughter having one extra. For someone with so many, having unmarked parents must have made life a living hell for Iris.

There were very few unmarked out there that were kind to those with soulmarks, but even those rare few would react badly to Iris’s half-dozen soulmates. She’d heard of people who had more than three actually being attacked and murdered, all because they were destined to be with more people than the unmarked deemed fair.

Standing up and reaching for Iris, the younger woman took her hands gently and offered her a sad, sympathetic smile. “I know it’s not much, but I’m here if you need me. I…I can’t even imagine what it must have been like for you, and still like now. But I am here. No matter what other people say or do, I’ll never turn you away because of this.”

Using her thumbs, Jessica lifted Iris’s sleeves up just slightly, exposing her wrist marks again. “If you have this many marks…just means you have more love in you than anyone else out there. You and your soulmates.”

Simple though her words were, they warmed Iris’s heart to know that not everyone out there were as cruel as some she had met in the past. So far, Karen and Jessica were the only ones that were not marked to her that knew of her many soulmarks—although, not the full extent of them—and had been kind and accepting. Even going so far as to offer help when possible.

Exhaling softly, Iris smiled back as she felt some weight lift off of her shoulders. Time and time again, she kept thinking how much her soulmates had changed her. This was yet another thing; she was no longer hiding in fear from her parents. He’d told her not to show her marks, so she’d left her apartment without her gloves, she’d shown Jessica some of the black on her pale skin, and she was determined to continue her progress.

“We should get back to work,” she declared suddenly, pulling her hands back and glancing toward the clock that was hung on the wall. “Open’s at eight, so we’ve got a few minutes.”

“You okay, Iris?” Jessica called before she could escape the room completely. “I mean…after what happened yesterday, and now you’re showing me your marks…what changed?”

Taking a moment, Iris decided that Jessica was someone she didn’t mind telling. “The man from yesterday, the one who helped me, he’s one of my soulmates,” she confessed. Jessica expression lit up again and a smile came across her face. “He’s one of three I’ve met recently, actually.”

“That’s great, Iris!” she cheered. “Congrats! I mean, I’ve heard about how great it is to meet them at last, so I’m kind of jealous now.”

Iris’s cheeks warmed at Jessica’s excited outburst. “I just don’t want to hide anymore. They’re helping me to realize that I’m not alone. I’m not a kid anymore that has to do as she’s told.”

Jessica’s excitement softened to a proud smile, her hands tucking into the pockets of her jeans as she nodded her head. “I’m glad, Iris. You deserve to be happy, and I’m glad you’re finally getting your chance. I’m with you, too, so if you ever need to talk without worrying about soulmates getting too involved then I’m all ears.”

If only she knew. Would she still think that way if Iris told her that her soulmates all shared the same body?

“Thank you, Jess.”

Jessica smiled once more before she moved to unpack her lunch from her bag, while Iris went to check for any email responses before the opened for the day. They would be holding down the store for an hour by themselves before anyone else was so clock in, so they both silently prayed for a quiet start to the day that wouldn’t overwhelm them.

Sitting at the back desk and logging in to the store’s email, Iris realized that she had forgotten to ask Jessica to walk home with her at the end of their shift. Making a mental note to bring it up with the younger woman, knowing that Jessica often made plans after her shift, Iris let herself focus on the task at hand while keeping an eye on the clock for store opening.

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || 12 || For the Love of Words

Warnings: Mentions of Violence, Mentions of Abuse,

Words: 3300+

Previous || Next

~12~

No sleep.

 Not one hour of sleep through the entire night.

 Iris had shadows under her eyes as she looked down at her phone, sitting in the middle of her bed, wrapped in her duvet, with the large clock display glaring back at her. Taunting her. Red rimmed her eyes from the tears she had shed the night before, only making her appearance all the more haggard and worrying. She had to go to work. She had to open the store on time. Looking away from the clock, the woman’s attention instead centered on the email icon on the top of the screen.

 She’d never opened it, never even checked who had sent it.

 The more obvious answer was that it was sent by Barry, Luke or BT—most likely BT, since they had just parted ways shortly before she’d received it. However, after what she had found on her door the night before and the voicemail left on her phone, Iris no longer believed that it was the obvious, first answer.

Locking the screen on her phone, she tossed the device to the end of her bed as her lips trembled. Could she really keep this up? Could she stay with her soulmates, trying for happiness again, if it meant that her parents would know what she was doing and possibly punish her for it? Taking a breath to try and calm herself, Iris slipped out of her duvet-cocoon and headed into the bathroom. She would need to shower before work, and she was desperately in need of some time to clear her head.

 She turned on the hot water before stepping back and beginning to strip off her clothes, which she had left on for too long. Her hair was oily from her hands running through it relentlessly all night, and she was hoping that a nice, steamy shower would help her to get rid of the haggard look she had acquired. Refusing to look in the mirror—already knowing how disgusting she would look—Iris pushed her clothing aside with her foot.

 Stepping into the shower, water hot enough that her skin stung momentarily upon contact, Iris let her forehead come to rest on the tiles of the shower.

 She needed to check that email; it was a no-brainer, and she knew that it was something she couldn’t delay on any further. There was nothing more that she hoped for that to open that email and find that it was from one of her soulmates.

 Iris wasn’t sure she could take her mother or father stepping into any more parts of her life.

 Sighing against the steam, Iris tipped her head back into the water and let it cascade through her hair. Weighing it down immediately, she simply stood beneath the spray for a moment as she let the feeling of the water wash away the stress she had carried through the night. The fatigue wouldn’t wash away, she knew that, but the water helped her to feel…clean. Like her troubles, her fears, were washing away with every drop of scalding water; burning them off her skin.

 Picking up her bottle of soap, she dutifully began cleaning her hair. The movements were robotic, mechanical and heavily rehearsed as her body ran on auto-pilot.

 More than ten years had passed since she’d left her parents behind; she thought that she had rid herself of the greatest fear, greatest pain that would ever come to her. Yet…they were back. And they were the same. They felt the need to control who she was, to take hold of her life and use her like a puppet hanging from strings.

 Tipping her head back under the spray of water to let the thick suds of soap rinse out, her slender fingers began combing through the soft, tangle-free strands.

 She was not a puppet.

 Turning to look through the glass door of the shower, her eyes fell on the mirror that was steadily fogging up around the edges, steam taking over every surface in her bathroom. Water cascaded down off her chin, her hair plastered down to her neck and shoulders, with her makeup making the shadows beneath her eyes that much more prominent.

 Along her torso, shoulders, arms, hips—all over her body—the dark writing of twenty-three soulmates, twenty-three identities, proved that she was not alone anymore. She didn’t need to face her parents by herself. Barry had explained that he and the other alters had been created for the soul purpose to protect Kevin. Turning her eyes away from her reflection, Iris took a moment to remember his arms around her when they had returned to her apartment.

 She’d been honest with him; exposing her deepest secret that she was so ashamed to admit. Living as a homeless teenager, having left before she’d finished high-school, fighting for herself and sharing beds with strangers in women’s shelters. He’s just held her, and supported her as she fell apart. It had felt…liberating. Telling someone her story and feeling his acceptance, listening to his promises as he calmed her sobs.

 Ain’t nothing going to get you now. You’ve got us on your side, and we protect our own.

 That was a new concept.

 Protection. Parents were meant to protect their children, yet they were the ones that she needed to be protected from now. And the ironic thing was that they were going against the soulmates that they had always told her would never want her. After all, who would want to share one, useless girl among twenty-some odd people? She almost wanted to laugh—if only they knew the truth.

 Reaching up to caress Barry’s words coiling her bicep, she knew that his words rang true. He was not the kind of person to make a promise and not follow through. Whether she’d known him a lifetime or a day, she could see that trait in an instant.

 Turning off the water, Iris stepped from the shower and stood in front of the mirror, still able to see her reflection through the faint layer of moisture. Turing around and twisting her torso just right, neck craning so she could see over her shoulder, her whiskey eyes fell on the black writing in the center of her back. Luke’s kind words and sweet nickname stared back at her, bold and confident to match the speaker.

 Facing her left side toward the mirror again, Iris smiled faintly as her fingers came to trace BT’s words, etched over her ribs as they followed the natural curve of her breast. He’d been so open with his marks, no fear of showing them to her.

 To the world.

 Thinking about his body, the body of all of her soulmates, covered in her writing like a brand of ownership caused her to flush with something akin to pride. They were hers. She’d never thought the day would come that she was able to say that someone was hers. And BT was one to flaunt it happily, proud to show that he had a soulmate—they all had a soulmate—and they had finally met one another after so many years of ‘almost’.

 Snatching her towel, Iris steeled herself and marched from her bathroom. She was not going to say that she wasn’t afraid—her parents terrified her more than anything else. Yet, she wasn’t alone to face them anymore. Drying off and pulling on her clothes for her shift, the whiskey eyed woman snatched her phone from her bed as she stepped up into her kitchen to begin preparing a small, light breakfast.

 Sliding down the notification tab before she could stop herself, she let out a shuddering, relieved sigh when BT’s email address came up with the title ‘Everything Alright?’ just above it. Tapping on the icon as she picked a packet of oatmeal from the cabinet, Iris leaned back nervously as his email loaded on her phone’s screen. The hot shower had helped her somewhat, but she was still dead-tired and her stomach seemed like it was against her trying to eat at that moment.

 Hey Doll,

 I just wanted to check to make sure you were alright? I don’t really know how to explain it, but I got a bad feeling while I was walking home and I just wanted to check to make sure you were okay? I’m no expert on all this soulmate stuff, but that kind of thing happens, right? Like, a connection that we have?

 I’m totally overreacting, right? Get back to me when you can, please? I’ll feel better and put it down to heartburn if you tell me you’re fine.

 Have a good night, Doll, sweet dreams.

 -BT

 Exhaling a shuddering breath, Iris could feel the deep pit of fear in her stomach alleviate somewhat. It hadn’t been her parents. Knowing for sure that it had been BT made her feel like she’d been a fool, not opening the notification all night, and when BT had seemed so worried, too. Guilt and embarrassment fought in her as she opened a new email to him, but paused before actually typing.

 Morning, BT

 I’m so sorry for not replying sooner, it’s been a bit of a bad night. I found something at my apartment when I got home that scared me a bit, but I’m alright now. I’ve read about connections between soulmates that allow for sensations like that, but I never knew anyone personally who have experienced it. I’m sorry that you were so worried, and I’m sorry if I ruined your night with it.

 Iris paused again as she read over what she had said. He’d be worried now, but she didn’t want to lie to him. She wasn’t that kind of person, and she refused to become that kind of person with her soulmates of all people.

 I’m scared, BT. My parents found me; my father left a note on my apartment door and a voicemail on my phone. He wants me to keep my marks covered, like I used to before I first met Barry.

 But I don’t want to. Not anymore.

 I have to go to work soon, but I’ll talk to you again.

 -Iris

 Hitting send, she dropped her phone on the counter as her hands trembled. She’d never thought that she would actually admit to that. But now he knew—which means that they would probably all know. If one of them thought that she was in trouble, she didn’t doubt that it was going to be told to the others immediately.

 Huffing softly, she turned to replace the packet back into the box. She’d never be able to keep food down at the moment. Instead, she started going through the motions of making herself a soft, herbal tea that would hopefully control her anxiety. She popped the kettle on the stove and placed her diffuser, filled with tea leaves, into her travel mug before she moved to pick her phone back up.

 Scrolling down to Barry’s contact and selecting a new email, she hopped up onto the counter as she considered what to say.

 Good morning, Barry!

 BT’s let slip that you had a meeting today; I don’t know if it’s too important or just a regular thing but I wanted to wish you luck either way. Good luck, have a great day at work, and I hope to hear back from you soon.

 -Iris

 Double-checking the email for errors, she soon sent that one out as well.

 Rubbing her eyes tiredly and rotating her sore neck—sitting up so many hours was beginning to come back to haunt her—she sat patiently on her counter as she waited for her water to finish boiling. Pulling her schedule up on her phone, Iris spent the last few minutes going over what shifts she had, and who was going to be working with her for each of them. There were also a few shipments coming in throughout the week, so there would be a lot of work to do to keep her busy.

 Letting her mind go over everything she had to do that day, she went through the motions of making her tea to take with her.

 Less than an hour later, Iris had her travel-mug in one hand, her scarf wrapped around her neck and her bag slung over her shoulder. Hair brushed and makeup applied, she felt somewhat better about how she looked. She’d barely spared a glance at the tear of tape and paper that remained stuck to her door before she pulled it off, folded it, and tossed it aside for the cleaners to pick up later. She’d deliberately left her gloves sitting on her unmade bed, leaving her hands bare and her mark exposed to the world around her.

 Her marks gave her strength.

 Her soulmates gave her confidence.

 Her parents gave her purpose to defy those who would judge her.

 Taking a deep, steadying breath as she stopped at the base of the stairs, Iris tried to prepare herself for what was to come. This was the decision she was making for herself; she would defy her fears, and those who caused such fears, if it meant that she had a chance to chase her happiness. Transferring her travel-mug to her other hand, she looked down at the writing on the back of her palm, so small and perfect.

 Sh, sh, shh, quiet now.

 Pressing a kiss to the back of her hand, using those words to draw whatever strength and courage she had left in her, Iris pushed open the stairwell door and made her way down the small corridor to the front entrance. Her keys were safely tucked in her pocket, easily accessed in case she ran into her father. Whether or not she would actually be able to use any of the self-defence techniques taught to her by the other girls of the shelters, she didn’t know. But he was officially a threat once more, so she needed to be prepared for that outcome.

 The cold morning air greeted her as she stepped from her old building, her scarf protecting her delicate neck from the chill as she turned around and let the door shut with an assuring click. She couldn’t watch out for every person that entered her building, even though there was a lock at the front door for a reason, but it somehow helped her to feel better by knowing there was even just that small security.

 Turning in the direction of her work, eyes lifting from the dew-covered pavement to check if there was anyone else up so early in the morning, she gasped as her eyes landed on the darkly dressed figure standing a few feet from her.

 “Barry!” she huffed, her heart racing in her chest as she turned back to the door and leaned against it to try and relieve the shaking that had suddenly taken over her legs. “God, you scared me,” she muttered, probably too quiet for him to hear, and rolled her head against the glass to watch as he approached her. His expression was pinched as he walked up to her trembling form, her hand clutching her travel-mug against her chest.

 “Iris,” he started carefully, gently taking her upper arm to pull her away from the door and face him fully. “BT told me about your email,” he continued after a brief moment. His voice was hoarse and he sounded tired, the faint appearance of shadows beneath his eyes causing her to frown. Reaching up with her marked hand, she gently traced a fingertip beneath his soft blue eyes.

 “I kept you up again,” she realized. BT had said he’d felt something was wrong; of course he’d stay up in worry for her when she never answered him. “I’m sorry.”

 Bowing her head as shame gripped her, the brunette leaned into Barry as he automatically opened his arms to her. Feeling him around her again, strong and secure, let her relax as she inhaled the scent that was unique to him—different from another other man out there, even Luke and BT, same body be damned.

 “Iris, I want you to know that if anything ever happens, no matter how small, we are here. Send a text to the number I gave you, or call, and no matter who has the light we will come for you.” Barry’s assurances helped to sooth her guilt, but she couldn’t entirely shake the feeling that came with knowing she had caused them such worry.

 Pulling back from her, Barry’s hands came to frame her face as he looked down at her and took in the tired look of her eyes. She’d spent the entire night in fear, and it made him feel sick with regret that they hadn’t known better and had come for her. “Next time, I promise I’ll call.”

 Smiling faintly, the expression not quite relieving the sadness in his eyes, Barry nodded. “You better. Or we’ll be showing up uninvited.”

 Iris mirrored his archaic smile. “You better,” she offered teasingly. Then her smile disappeared as her eyes grew worried. “Your meeting!”

 “No, don’t worry,” he interrupted, not giving her time to fret. “The zoo doesn’t open for a few hours, I’ve still got lots of time before my shift. I just couldn’t not see you. I was too worried—we all were.”

 Iris winced again, the guilt gripping her heart. “Sorry.”

 Barry shook his head with a smile. Of course she’d feel guilty about them being worried. “Stop apologizing,” he ordered with a faint laugh. The tenseness around them dissipated as he leaned forward to press a lingering kiss against her forehead. “So, want some company on your walk?” Stepping back and offering her his arm, the gentlemanly, cliché action was enough to have her laughing as she looped her arm through his. Her hand cupped his bicep as they began walking, her mark on display to anyone out on the early-morning streets.

 “Will you be okay, Iris?” Barry asked in all seriousness as he looked down at her. He didn’t want to bring up her parents, especially her father, but he couldn’t just let the topic slide away. She’d confessed to BT that she was scared, and they had felt her fear all through the night like a hand was slowly squeezing their life away.

 Sighing softly as she leaned into his side, her hand tightened on his bicep and her head fell to rest on his shoulder for a moment.

 “I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “My father is the most terrifying thing in my life; the monster in my closet and under my bed. Knowing that he was…so close, all this time, it terrifies me. And I don’t know what he’ll do. I’m not his child anymore, he can’t just pull me off and lock me in a room like they used to. But…what will he do? The not knowing is what scares me most.”

 Barry’s head came to rest atop hers as he supressed the urge to tense up and punch something. He wasn’t a violent person, not usually, but her parents were driving his thoughts to darker places. “I can walk you home, or to work, when I can—I know it’s not much but-”

 “It’s perfect,” she assured. “But you just said you have a couple of hours before your shift. I’m not making you and any of the others get up so early because of me. You all have lives as well, and I refuse to ruin that.”

 “Doesn’t count if we’re offering,” he countered. “And believe me, any one of the others would be more than happy to walk you to work, or home at the end of the day. Everyone wants to meet you so badly, and those that have are vying for a bit of attention.”

 Iris flushed after his confession. “Thank you, Barry, for coming here this morning…and for just being here, period.”

 Smiling in assurance, he leaned over to rest his forehead against hers, pinching his neck slightly in the process but by no means regretting it. “Always, Sweetheart. Always.”

Previous || Next

[bold-writing]

The One With Whiskey Eyes || Masterlist

Summary:  Soulmate AU. Not everyone had a soulmate, there were many in the world who were unmarked. Iris Mayfair, however, has been forced to hide her skin for nearly thirty years. She doesn't have just one or two soulmates-even three would make people sneer and judge; no, she has twenty-three legible marks on her skin; with a blurry, unfinished twenty-fourth blooming across her flesh.

Warnings: 18+, swearing, descriptions of violence, descriptions of abuse, possible triggers for abuse, mature content, graphic depictions of violence, gore and sex.

Characters: Iris (OFC), Barry, BT, Luke, Patricia, Felicia, Hedwig, Dennis, Jade, minor original characters. More to come as story progresses.

Chapter 1: Prologue

Chapter 2: Black Words and Silver Scars

Chapter 3: Who Are We to Question Fate

Chapter 4: Finding Balance

Chapter 5: Soft Tones in Which to Whisper

Chapter 6: When I Wake

Chapter 7: Simplicity in Normalcy

Chapter 8: Let Me Bear Your Scars

Chapter 9: Precious Porcelain, Crack and Broken

Chapter 10: Simple Comforts

Chapter 11: Chained and Free

Chapter 12: For The Love of Words

Chapter 13: Let the Morning Keep Our Secrets

Chapter 14: Small Wonders

Chapter 15: My Reason to Be

Chapter 16: For I Am Wanted

Chapter 17: The Absence of Fear

Chapter 18: My Pieces, Like Shattered Glass

Chapter 19: Beneath the Gentle Snow

Chapter 20: Cinnamon and Whiskey

Chapter 21: Weathered but Not Broken