#the one I'll be remaking today

[sorryiliketoscreenshot]

⤷ Inquisitor Nethras Lavellan

[sansaisms]

Arya never seemed to fit, no more than he had … yet she could always make Jon smile. He would give anything to be with her now, to muss up her hair once more and watch her make a face, to hear her finish a sentence with him. — Jon Snow III, A Game of Thrones.

[slugpup2]

ryoshu that was going to be for 4/4, but i was too busy with school and playing canto 6. i tried making a detailed background for this one, but i didn't like how it turned out so that version is below the cut.

i had a really good image for this in my head but i rushed in without much planning, especially on the perspective... oh well. cityscapes are hard.

[sapphire-weapon]

I’m about to vomit out a bunch of thoughts, and I’m not sure any of this is going to make sense by the end, but. I’ve been thinking a LOT about these three lines in RE4make:

“You haven’t changed. You just think you have.”

“You can’t save her. You can’t save anyone.”

“This time, it has to be different...”

I’ve seen people focus in on that Krauser line and tie it directly back to Sherry, which is cool! Even as recently as five years ago, people completely glossed over Sherry’s impact on Leon’s life, and it’s cool that the remakes have had people digging into his character and realizing “oh shit, literally everything that happens to him after RE2 is because of his paternal love for Sherry.”

But... Krauser’s line is about more than just her.

With the remake turning Krauser into Leon’s combat trainer, chances are he knows about everything that happened in Raccoon City. And I don’t mean, like. He read a government file. Leon probably told him.

In OG, Krauser and Leon have this exchange of dialogue:

Krauser: “What is it that you fight for, comrade?” Leon: “My past, I suppose.” Krauser: “Hmph. Umbrella.”

It was axed completely from the remake, because it doesn’t make sense for it to happen in the remake. If Krauser was Leon’s trainer, that question was probably asked very early in their relationship. And since they weren’t currently in a fight to the death, and because they weren’t already six years removed from Raccoon City, chances are, Leon’s answer was a bit more involved than just “my past.”

So, let’s back up a little bit. In RE2make, they basically turned Kendo into a completely different character. OG Kendo was literally just there to point a shotgun at Leon and/or Claire and then go “oh my bad you’re not a zombie” and hook them up with some guns before he gets eaten. In RE2make, he’s a desperate and terrified father just trying to spend his last few moments with his infected 6 or 7 year old daughter before she turns. After he shuts the door on Leon and Ada, Leon turns to Ada and says, “Protecting people like that is why I joined the force.”

But Leon doesn’t protect or save Kendo or his daughter. He doesn’t protect or save... anyone. Every single person that Leon comes into contact with and tries to save dies horrifically -- and some, he even has to kill, himself (Marvin Branaugh). The only people who make it out of Raccoon City alive are people who saved themselves (Claire and Ada).

Of course, there is Sherry. But Leon didn’t save Sherry; Claire did. ESPECIALLY in remake canon, since nearly all of Leon’s scenes with Sherry got severely shortened or removed completely in RE2make.

But then, when Claire entrusts Sherry to Leon’s care (on his own insistence, per her RE3 epilogue), he goes and fucks that up, too. Gets her kidnapped and held hostage indefinitely by the federal government, and the only thing he can do about it is do exactly as they say and just hope they keep their end of the bargain and not hurt her.

So, when Krauser says “You can’t save anyone,” he means anyone. Ever. And even up to that point in RE4... Leon got the two officers who drove him into town killed, and he watched Luis die a slow, agonizing death right in front of him. And then, past that point, Leon has to kill Krauser with his own hands. Then he watches Mike die.

Ashley is literally Leon’s first and only success story, up to this point in canon. (And even when you go all the way up to current-day canon, Ashley is one of... three? People? I can think of? Total? Who Leon actually saves?)

So, Leon saying, “This time, it has to be different,” he doesn’t just mean Sherry. He means Ada. He means Kendo. He means Marvin. He means the entirety of Raccoon City. He’s staring down a repeat of what happened back then, not in terms of the bioterror situation, but in terms of his own personal failures. His survivor’s guilt. He can’t handle the thought that he’ll be the only person to walk away again -- and he refuses to be.

And that’s why Ada’s line bothers me so fucking much.

I mean, first of all -- Ada, you haven’t seen this man in six years, and you’ve spent a total of like five minutes with him since meeting up with him again here, so how the fuck would you even know -- but even aside from that...

To be clear: she’s right.

But she’s also wrong.

Leon has changed -- to an extent. In RE2 (OG or remake), Leon honestly believed that if it was lawful, then it was also morally right. He doesn’t believe that anymore. There’s no more “letting the law sort it out” or trusting in the power of authority for him anymore. His moral compass has been boiled down to: “If you hurt or murder innocent people, you’re a fucking asshole, and I don’t really care who you are, I’ll kill you myself.”

RE2 Leon was willing to hear people out and give them an honest benefit of the doubt -- even Annette Birkin. RE4 Leon just tells people to shut the fuck up before opening fire.

RE2 Leon was honest and trusting to a fault, and he felt stronger as part of a team. RE4 Leon is suspicious almost to the point of paranoia, and he just wants to be left the fuck alone to do his job.

These are all things that were really important to who Leon was in Raccoon City, and they’re reasons why things turned out the way they did for him, back then.

But at the same time, Ada’s right in saying that, at the core of it all, Leon is still that kind-hearted, decent guy who just wants the good guys to win and the bad guys to lose. That’s why it hits him somewhere sensitive when Krauser says: “You can’t save anyone.” 

It’s just that, now, the way he approaches it is different. His outlook on life in terms of his goals is different. His expectations for it have changed.

So, if Leon had been smarter/wittier, he absolutely could have turned it around on her and said: “No, I’ve definitely changed. You just think I haven’t.”

And not only would that sound threatening as fuck, he’d also be right. They both would be, at that point.

And for all of those major parts of him to have changed and still be facing down the possibility of failing every single person he comes across, especially Ashley...

"This time, it has to be different.”

And this time, it was.

[torveiglyart]

So you know how each post has 3 pages? And I've posted 24 parts?

How in the world have I made 72 images for this. And more to come.

Jesus Christ, I need a life.

[promiscxous]

{ It's time to say hello to the parentals for the Yumishi siblings! And yes, that's right, you count four parents. Two sets. Why? Because the Yumishi family is actually very convoluted compared to most normal families. }

{ First off we have Lucifer, who can be found over on @resxntmxnt once I get everything settled, as the biological father of both Myth (who is also over at @resxntmxnt) and Rain (who's over at @negligxnce). He is the ruler of Meikai no Ryōiki, also commonly referred to as the Realm of the Underworld, altering his original seraphic genetics with dark magic to turn himself into a being known solely as the Demon Lord, yet due to having originally been a seraph, he possesses the ability to shapeshift. Lucifer was the original lover of Kisuyo Yumishi, happening upon her by sheer chance within Seikatsu no Ryōiki, also known as the Realm of the Living (aka the human world), one day when she was being attacked by a group of humans that believed her to be the leader of a cultist group (due to the fact she is heavily religious while the mortals of Seikatsu no Ryōiki have no religion/do not believe in religion of any sort); and despite Lucifer's reputation of being a cruel and mischievous being, he went out of his way to rescue her by slaughtering the humans responsible for her injuries.

Once certain that she was safe, Lucifer began to tend to her wounds with his magic, trying to keep conversation to a minimum though this did not last long due to Kisuyo's curious nature, leading for Lucifer and Kisuyo to eventually develop a strong bond for one another — thus resulting in the birth of Myth and Rain. Yet despite this, Lucifer did not stick around for his lover nor his children and ended up returning to Meikai no Ryōiki, leaving Kisuyo with two children to care for all on her own due to the fact that Kisuyo would not be able to survive within Meikai no Ryōiki. He is devastated by the news of Kisuyo's death.

Secondly we have Michael, who can be found over at @anxmosxty once everything is settled over there, as the biological father of Koui and Yuuela (who is also over at @anxmosxty). He is the ruler of Serafu no Ryōiki, also commonly referred to as the Realm of the Seraph, proudly taking his duties as a seraph to heart, earning him the title of Head Angel by those within Serafu no Ryōiki and as a seraph, he possesses the ability to shapeshift. Michael is the second lover of Kisuyo Yumishi, though unlike Lucifer who was willing to care for her, Michael instead was disgusted with her and the fact she had two children with a man she wasn't married to, often pretending to seem kindhearted towards the woman only to judge her in secret. The only reason he would actively spend time with her every day was because of a rumor he'd overheard from the other seraphs about a woman who had given birth to a pair of twins that possessed unnatural abilities for human children, thus he took every chance he could to get close to her and her boys. Though during his time with Kisuyo, he soon discovers that despite all the reticule she receives from the mortals within Seikatsu no Ryōiki, she stills holds tightly to her faith in the Goddess, which in turn makes Michael begin to view Kisuyo in a different light.

Within time, Michael realizes he's fallen in love with Kisuyo, thus resulting in the births of Koui and Yuuela. Unlike Lucifer, Michael is consistent with his daily visits to spend time with his children and Kisuyo, even going out of his way to treat Myth and Rain as his own. Though, once word gets out that the woman from the rumors has had two more children with unnatural abilities and has her identity revealed, Michael stops visiting Kisuyo and her children out of fear of being casted out of Serafu no Ryōiki by the current Goddess, Heiliger, once she discovers that the children born are a forbidden species known as hybrids — constituted of a law that forbids other species from breeding with anyone other than their respective species — and have a contract placed on their heads to be exterminated as soon as possible alongside their mother. He is devastated by the news of Kisuyo's death.

Third we have Kisuyo Yumishi, who can be found here, as the biological mother of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela. She is a resident of the more olden timed area of Seikatsu no Ryōiki (because Seikatsu no Ryōiki is home to a more olden timed section and a more modern timed section of the realm for those who prefer the more technologically advanced lifestyle or those who prefer the more dated lifestyle), also known as the Realm of the Living, and is presumed to be a human woman by those within the world of Mir Ender. In reality, Kisuyo is actually the daughter of the Goddess, The Sacred One, thus making her a demi-god and serves as a vessel for the Goddess' will within the various realms of Mir Ender. Despite not seeming to possess any abilities, she can actually see the future and share her sight with The Sacred One, but doing so requires a lot of angelic energy and can overwhelm her senses thus why she wears a black cloth over her eyes, leading many to believe that she is blind. Kisuyo is the third oldest child of The Sacred One, being the younger sister of Oizys (the Archfiend of Melancholy), the older sister of Adios (the Saint of Humility), and the older sister of Sophrosyne (the Saint of Temperance), meanwhile Adephagia is the Archfiend of Gluttony. Each of said sisters possessing a mortal name for their travels among the other realms: Adios known as Oka, Sophrosyne known as Maleia, and Adephagia being known as Kisuyo. Oizys is the only one of the sister's to not possess a mortal name out of disinterest in hiding her true identity, thus her sisters simply call her by the name "El" within Seikatsu no Ryōiki among mortals.

Before having her children, Kisuyo was sent to live within Seikatsu no Ryōiki by The Sacred One in order glean how the mortals were fairing in their daily lives, making gathering intel much easier so The Sacred One can make the lives of her residents easier if need be by sending one of her daughters to assist the morals in their true forms (and not as "mortals"). During her time within Seikatsu no Ryōiki, Kisuyo plays the role of a devote worshiper to The Sacred One, serving as a shrine maiden at the Holy Chruch of Heiliger, additionally teaching her children about her religion and convincing them to believe as well. After being abandon by both of her lovers, Kisuyo is then hunted down by an assassin and is killed in front of her children while on their way to the Holy Church of Heiliger for their daily worship, though she does not actually die due to being a demi-god and instead is simply comatose for a time being (until Oizys is able to retrieve her body and awaken her), yet this is unbeknownst to her children who believe she was murdered.

Lastly we have Sire, who can be found over at @prurixncy once everything is settled there, as the biological "mother" of Nikusui (who is also over at @prurixncy) and Inori (who is over at @vxinglxry). You're probably wondering why I said "mother" and not mother. Well, that's because Sire isn't actually a woman in her true form, but is instead a man and said man is Lucifer. Yes, that's right. I said Lucifer. The man I talked about all the way at the top of the post. That Lucifer. Myth and Rain's dad, Lucifer. Demon Lord Lucifer. The one and the same. "Why the hell would Lucifer become a woman to have two children?" Because he blames Michael for the death of Kisuyo and wanted to get back at him for taking away the only woman he loved so dearly, just like Michael believes that Lucifer is the one who took Kisuyo away from him. The both of them believe that the other is responsible for the death of Kisuyo. Why? Because they are both sworn enemies and have always been at odds ever since the incident involving The Sacred One and The Twelve Saints of The Sacred One/The Twelve Heavenly Virtues due to the fact they were both present at the time. The incident that caused The Sacred One to fall into a catatonic state and the divide of The Twelve Heavenly Virtues, which in turn also created the false Goddess known as The Forsaken One and The Seven Archfiends of The Forsaken One. Lucifer and Michael don't trust one another and know that the other would be more than willing to do anything to take away the other's happiness if they could. And yes, they're both aware they fell in love with the same woman.

Basically, Lucifer decides that the best way to exact his revenge on Michael is to become a woman that he can trust and love and become so deeply intertwined with that he simply can't live without her. And that is exactly what happens. Lucifer becomes Sire and acts as a beacon of hope for Michael while he secretly (because he can't let anyone know he was involved with Kisuyo) mourns the lost of his lover and the inevitable loss of his children (since they're being hunted). Sire becomes Michael's crutch. And during a moment of weakness, Sire repeatedly takes advantage of Michael's desperation for his deceased lover, resulting in the births of Nikusui and Inori. Though much like he did with Myth and Rain, he takes Michael's new children away from him and leaves them with Warwick, someone that worships and follows Lucifer, to raise the girls in secret — leaving Michael alone once more to fester about the disappearances of his new children and lover. Only later in time does Michael discover that Sire was Lucifer in disguise. }

{ So if all of you have gotten past all of that, it's time to tell you the exact relations of everyone within the Yumishi family in case you're confused. So here were go!

Lucifer and Kisuyo are the biological parents of Myth and Rain.

Michael and Kisuyo are the biological parents of Koui and Yuuela.

Michael and Sire (aka Lucifer's female form) are the biological parents of Nikusui and Inori.

Kisuyo is the biological daughter of The Sacred One, the absolute Goddess of the world of Mir Ender.

Kisuyo is the younger sister of Oizys, the Archfiend of Melancholy.

Kisuyo is the older sister of Adios and Sophrosyne, the Saints of Humility and Temperance.

Oizys, Adios, and Sophrosyne are all the biological aunts of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela. They are the adoptive aunts of Nikusui and Inori due to the fact neither Lucifer/Sire or Michael are related to The Sacred One.

Myth and Rain are biological brothers (twins).

Koui and Yuuela are biological brother and sister.

Nikusui and Inori are biological sisters.

Myth is the biological half-brother of Koui and Yuuela.

Rain is the biological half-brother of Koui and Yuuela.

Koui is the biological half-brother of Myth and Rain.

Yuuela is the biological half-sister of Myth and Rain.

Nikusui is the biological half-sister of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela.

Inori is the biological half-sister of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela.

Warwick is the adoptive father of Nikusui and Inori.

Warwick is the adoptive uncle of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela.

The Sacred One is the grandmother of Myth, Rain, Koui, and Yuuela. She is the adoptive grandmother of Nikusui and Inori.

[iwakuraz]

okay FILLER ART!!!!!!

[invinciblerodent]

what do you mean i have a problem

..... i'll finish all of these (i have not finished even one of these)

[dokidokistart]

i updated my portfolioo

[queen-scribbles]

Brand spankin' new Shae Vizla server babies!

Tressa (Knight, Shadow) || Sethris (Warrior, Juggernaut)

Ajayi (Consular, Shadow) || Krysa (Inquisitor, Assassin)

Azana (Trooper, Gunslinger) || Slate (Hunter, Sniper)

Indira (Agent, Scoundrel) || Kenda (Smuggler, Scoundrel)

[connieshands]

She's me. I'm her.

[thatonecrookedsmile]

Before the month started, I had made my own tierlist of projects and announcements that are/will be shown during the special FNAF anniversary week based on how excited I was/am for them. The highest ones are the ones I'm most interested in and the lowest ones are the ones I'm…not.

I did this at the end of July, and only now did I remember to post it here.

The week is going well, but it's this second half that will be more interesting.

OG Tierlist/Template.

[nysus-temple]

ULTRAKILL's Greek Folklore references (2)

Aaaye remember this post? Let's say Sisyphus already came out as a boss and I have quite a bunch of stuff to talk about. I'll focus only on him since everything else was covered in the previous essay.

Just like in the previous essay, BEFORE YOU GO DOWN this is, to no one's surprise, filled with spoilers. While it's true that lore in this game is secondary, if you wanna learn it by yourself when playing it, then save this reading for later. ULTRAKILL is avaible at Steam, it's filled with blood, but it's still a masterpiece, me thinks.

· Small Introduction:

There's many people out there who have already talked about everything that reminds them of the Divine Comedy regarding the game, besides the fact that it takes inspiration in DMC too; but almost no one seems to notice the details that reference Greek folklore, and it's true that they are not THAT important, most likely i'm just imagining references in places where there are actually none, but this is what brainrot does to a girl who- well, is a classical philology student lmao. So wether they are true or not, i'll still will write this thing down or else i'll explode with my thoughts.

· ULTRAKILL's King Sisyphus:

"King Sisyphus has acted in secret until now, amassing an army whose strength and numbers swell, but now there is no need to hide anymore. We have lived in the shadow of Heaven long enough to forget the taste of fear. Now the Sisyphean Insurrectionists prepare for war.

❝ I have heard of Minos beginning a peaceful revolution, but our King Sisyphus knows such pacificity will gain no favor from our cruel captors. He knows that one can only fight power with power, and he shall lead us to freedom.❞

^ Text from a book found in the second level of the Greed Layer.

If you remember Minos' lore, Minos instead decided to do a peaceful revolution, building his own shenanigans in the Lust Layer, but Sisyphus didn't think the same way; he decided to do a revolution too, but it was anything but peaceful.

❝ The Sisyphean Insurrectionists were an army of Husks gathered and trained by King Sisyphus for overthrowing Heaven's control of Hell, freeing the sinners from their eternal torment. […]

Upon the establishment of the Council and subsequent return of peace to Heaven, Gabriel and an army of angels were sent down to crush the insurrection and subjugate Sisyphus' army.

Although their battle was well-fought, the inexperienced Insurrectionist could not match the educated strategy of the angels, who quickly descended upon King Sisyphus with great force, eventually overpowering and killing him, leaving the Insurrectionists without a chain of command.

Left scattered and disoriented, the warriors were easily picked off one by one, their bodies cut apart, leaving behind only the bare essentials to carry on their eternal punishment of hauling heavy boulders up the monuments of mankind's arrogance and greed.

Although the blood of their enemies still stains their bodies and their grasp still clutches their fallen foes, their will and fierce fury only serve as mental torment in knowing how close they were to freedom.❞

^ Terminal data of the Sisyphean Insurrectionists in the game

The Insurrectionists mantain Greek Sisyphus' original punishment, carrying a rock up to the top of a mountain ( n the game, a pyramid) that will eventually fall down again.

(Greek amphora of Sisyphus pushing the rock in the Underworld, meanwhile, Persephone watches over him, making sure that he does not try to avoid his punishment. [Yes the dick is out.])

Now, more interesting details… Greek King Sisyphus wasn't that much liked by the gods since he, wellp, cheated death a couple times and... Screwed up a lot of times too. For context:

(Apollodorus - Bibliotheca) He murdered his guests, which was seen as extremelly horrible since one of the main important things in Ancient Greece was hospitality. And a king who murders his guests isn't that good of a host.

They sent Death (Θάνατος [Thanatos]) to catch him for this main reason. But Sisyphus tricked him and captured him. And since Death being captured meant no people dying, Ares then went to go and stop Sisyphus.

Knowing he was gonna be killed, Sisyphus asked his wife to not give his corpse a proper funeral, and instead to throw him away. After this, he lied to the gods and manipulated them, telling either Persephone or Hades (or both) that his wife disrespected him by not giving him a proper funeral, and they allowed his soul to go back to his corpse.

After Sisyphus had died of old age, is when his punishment starts. He commited so many crimes and yet, the way he felt was never spoken. Even blind and old in the Underworld, he would continue his punishment.

Greek Sisyphus was thrown into the Underworld with a punishment and Greek Minos was turned into a Judge of the Underworld; in this game, Minos' corpse is still used as some kind of Judge… More or else, as I said before. Meanwhile, Sisyphus corpse isn't used at all, it is just imprisoned, with no head, even. Perhaps that has something to do with the Greek Sisyphus being punished instead of turning into a Judge of Hell, or similar, like the Greek Minos was?

Oh, by the way, unlike Minos being blind being due to him being a Judge and Justice is blind; Sisyphus was blinded by greed, so he literally is blinded by gold. Just like how the Greek Minos was a Judge as well, and Greek Sisyphus was a greedy king who killed guests in his palace in order to get their goods, a violation of guest-obligations in Ancient Greece.

❝ To him, fighting an impossible battle with full knowledge of its futility and taking joy in just the act of resistance itself is the ultimate rebellion against the oppressor. ❞

^ Terminal data of Sisyphus' Prime in the game.

"Ah… So concludes the life and times, of King Sisyphus. A fitting end, to an existence defined by futile struggle. Doomed, from the very start. And I don't regret a SECOND of it!" — Sisyphus Prime final lines after being defeated by the player.

Both Greek Sisyphus and ULTRAKILL's Sisyphus are cunning, in Homer's Iliad he's described as the most cunning of the greeks, before Odysseus takes that title. (And, fun fact, Odysseus is considered Sisyphus' son by many tragedy authors! If you remember my other ULTRAKILL essay, you'll remember how I considered the Wrath layer to be an Odyssey reference). In the Odyssey, Sisyphus' punishment is described, but we don't exactly know how he feels. Does he feel regret? Does he not? We can suppose that he does, since that punishment is... Yeah, tiring. But those are just assumptions, so, who knows, perhaps he does not regret anything, just like ULTRAKILL's Sisyphus.

It's true that ULTRAKILL's Sisyphus is most likely based on later-on depictions of the myth, philosophical interpretations and such, but that's not my job, I just ramble.

In any case, Greek Sisyphus even tricked the divine, and ULTRAKILL's Sisyphus fought the divine.

In the end, we can't see none of the two Sisyphus' faces during their punishment, and yet... ❝ One must imagine Sisyphus happy.❞

[lae-zels]

i've got a headache trying to make it work but i ultimatelly managed because these idiots and their tadpoles are just too damn horny

[toastedjeans]

With the amount of aus i have (and me not posting about them for a long time) i should probably restructure my pinned post a bit and link to the aus so it's easier to find more about them. In case of the au posts that are gone since my deactivation.. idk maybe I'll do a quick post and then link it. Depends on my mood tbh. Maybe I'll hit up some old mutuals as well to help me find some posts. Or I'll just link the tag.... that's probably easier (and i don't have to talk to people cause I'm a COWARD)

ANYWAY, tldr, pinned post gets an overhaul for better au finding purposes

[whateveriwant]

Task force 141 reacting to their very pregnant wife still trying to clean, cook etc

This turned more into ‘Task force 141 preventing their very pregnant wife from trying to clean, cook, etc’ lmaooooo I hope that's alright

Price

HA! Good one!

No seriously, it's actually hilarious that you think you'd do anything for yourself when your hubby's around

That man has been waiting on you hand and foot since you first got together. So now that you're pregnant and you think he'd let you so much as lift a finger? You must have a serious case of pregnancy brain, sweetheart

Price is doing all the cooking, the cleaning, the running errands, etc. throughout the entirety of your pregnancy (and at least the first several months postpartum)

He's kept you practically bed bound these last few months to the point where you think there's a perfect indent of your body molded into the mattress

Seven months in, he's suddenly called away to a quick mission halfway across the globe, and you think finally you'll get some of your autonomy back...

Well, think again because who should show up at your door the next morning than your mother-in-law herself, ready to pick up where her son left off

She came at the behest of your husband, of course, and was armed with a detailed set of care instructions

What does your husband think you are? Some sort of one-of-a-kind, priceless artifact that needs special handling? (Actually that's exactly what you are. Price-less… I'll see myself out 🚶🏻‍♀️)

Ghost

When it comes to having some semblance of independence during your pregnancy, Ghost will give you a bit of a longer leash than Price, but only just so

You’re going for a walk around the neighborhood? Hold on, let him grab his coat to join you. Or you're going into the backyard to tend the garden? He'll pull the weeds while you water the plants

But when it comes to letting you do certain things, there are some hard nos that he will absolutely not budge on

You try to use a stepladder to reach the top of the cupboard? Stop! You'll break your neck! You try to pick up anything heavier than 10 pounds? Stop! Give it here! You try to drive?... Don't even fuckin' think about it, precious.

The farther along your pregnancy progresses, the better he gets at predicting (and intercepting) your next move

You were gonna do laundry today? Well, wouldn't you know, he's already got a load going in the washer. You were about to make dinner? Well shucks, he just ordered takeaway from that Greek place you love

His ability to read your mind is honestly impressive once you get past how damn annoying you find it. Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you're incapable of fending for yourself, and you're tired of him acting as if otherwise

But really, you can never get mad at anything he does for you. After all, what kind of a husband would he be if he didn't take care of his missus and your little one?

Soap

If you take Ghost’s cautiousness, mix it with Price’s thoroughness, and crank it up to an 11, you get Soap

From the moment he found out you were pregnant, he put your house into full lockdown mode, stopping just short of booby trapping the front door in case you got any funny ideas

You want some fresh air? Just open a window. You want to go for a walk and stretch your legs? Just take a few turns about the living room like you're some Austenian heroine

Don't let him catch you doing any kind of physical labor, because so help him Jesus he will grab a spray bottle and use it like you're a feral alleycat he's trying to house-train (he wouldn't really... but don't test him)

You try to unload the dishwasher? Ehrr! Wrong move. You try to remake the bed? Ehrr! Nice try. You try to mop up your own mess. Ehrr! Enough already. You try to– OCH, WOULD YE BLOODY SIT DOWN, WOMAN?!

For nine long months during his requested leave from work, your husband is attached to you like some kind of loving, smothering barnacle

But doesn't he miss his job, or the lads for that matter? What if the world needs saving? What will they do without him?

Well, (in his exact words) fuck the rest of the world! You're his world, bonnie, and he'll give you everything you could ever wish for and then some

Gaz

By far, you have the most independence with Gaz than you would with any of the other three men… at least, at the beginning of your pregnancy, that is

Once you get to around five or six months he becomes just as helicopter-y as all the others; he's just ever so slightly more bearable, perhaps

There's lots of peeking his head around the corner to check on you throughout the day or appearing seemingly out of thin air whenever you're doing something he'd rather you wouldn't

You've lost count of the number of times you've been in the middle of cooking or hanging up the laundry or whatever and his hand has suddenly appeared out of nowhere, gently taking the object from you before directing you to sit and rest

And like, look. He knows you can handle yourself. He knows you could conquer the whole world if you wanted to. That's one of the things he loves about you the most

But seeing you like this – so fragile, so vulnerable, so beautiful and soft and pregnant with his child; his child – it just… It makes him…

He just needs to do these things for you, alright, love? Just let him take care of you, please? Would you let him do that?

You already have so much you have to carry. Let him ease some of the burden off your shoulders. Let him do these small things for you because they don't even compare to all that you're doing for him 🥲