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endless-ineffabilities · 9 months ago

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The Bolter (part two)

Steve Rogers x f!reader

synopsis : Steve carries out his decision to return to Peggy, aiming to live out the rest of his days with her. But this means he's leaving everything behind - he's leaving you. Did he make the right choice? Will there be anything left with you to come back to?

in this chapter : Steve tries to settle into his life in the 50s, and we get a glimpse of the days when Steve and the reader were getting to know each other post Civil War.

themes/warnings : pining, unrequited love, Steve beginning to regret his decision (he just won't admit it yet), the NSFW stuff won't happen until after a whiiiile, this is a slow burn (y'all can blame Steve!!)

word count : <2k

main masterlist ▪︎ series masterlist

The 1950s, one month after Steve's arrival

Peggy knows about you. It doesn't take her long to figure it out. What started out as the mystery figure her partner seems to be so wistful over - as time passes, the idea of you becomes stronger.

It takes shape, like you are not just a memory to be gotten over.

You're there, in their very walls, but you're not. Of all the people Steve left behind, your shadow looms the strongest over him.

"She must have been special, Steve. She sounded like a very dear friend," Peggy expresses, one morning over breakfast when they were going through the people in Steve's future.

Past, to be more apt. All those people are no longer going to be a part of Steve's days. You no longer will be.

He thought he would be fine with it all, treating it like the end of a book. This is his fresh start with Peggy, a chance to simply live his life without constant threat of impending doom.

That apple pie, white picket fence, American dream. He wants to have a son and a daughter. Maybe he'll even name them after you and James.

The two most important people in his life then, reflected in the children whom will be his reason for existence.

Everything should be just perfect.

So why isn't it?

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2017, eight months after the Avengers' Civil War

Being on the run was brutal, but familiar.

A year ago, you were made to choose between the two sides in the Sokovia accords, after your old friend Natasha pulled you out of your over extended holiday.

She wanted you to join her side, Tony's side. They could use all the help they can get to fight Captain America who apparently had gone rogue.

Little did she know that you would end up fighting with him instead, after you found out what his motivations were.

After the war, yourself and all those who acted against the accords were branded enemies of the state. Incidentally, this included Nat, who also had a change of heart.

Captain America - Steve - broke you out of a maximum security prison, and you all branched out in different parts of the world to go into hiding.

At first, you and Nat went to her safehouse in Budapest. Then to one of your apartments in Malta. Eventually, you had to separate to keep the trail cold, and to confuse anyone at your tail.

Which is how you ended up in some remote cabin in Alaska with none other than Steve himself.

And you got to know each other really well.

He was closed off at first, maintaining a sense of cordiality that must come as second nature to him. It was evident that the Civil War took a toll on him. He had an anger, a resentment about him that wasn't there when you first came across him in Romania. When you decided to cross over and aid in his cause.

For the first few weeks, he kept his distance, merely keeping up with what's required of a fellow lodger on the run. He made sure there was hot coffee left for you when he brewed a fresh batch. He was always quiet in his room across the hall. He would say his polite good mornings, his how are yous, before taking his daily walk in the woods, scouting the area for any potential anomalies.

It took a while before he stopped being just Captain America in your eyes, but inevitably, you grew to know Steve Rogers.

And you came to fall in love with him. But you didn't admit this until much, much later.

You're not sure which one of you broke first, but eventually the polite, little greetings turned into breakfast conversations, eventually incorporating comfortable inside jokes.

You discovered that he had a myriad of questions about your chosen life, how you ended up working for The Agency. Much like the Red Room but without any ties to a particular government, The Agency specialized in producing highly-skilled individuals when it comes to combat and covert operations.

For a while, it was your MO to make sure that the widows were unsuccessful in their missions which involved civilian casualties. So you first encountered Nat when the Red Room gave her the task to take you out, but you were too wily and evaded her at every turn.

At some point, and to both yours and her surprise, you actually ended up becoming friends.

You could tell that Steve was holding back in commenting on your choice of profession, but he wasn't really in any position to judge - America's former poster boy turned into their number one fugitive. He wanted to suggest that perhaps there was a better life out there suited for you, one that didn't require you to constantly look behind your shoulder.

But how could he? You were there because of him. In a way, his rebellion pulled you out of your momentary pocket of paradise.

You told him you had retired before Nat called you in, but of course that wouldn't have lasted long. One way or another, you always found yourself back in.

Like you were craving it, almost. Or because you had nothing else but this life. This was your normal.

"What do you think it would look like, if you actually had a shot at normal?" he asked, the glowing embers of the fireplace dancing shadows across his face.

You observed him, and you couldn't help but note how impossibly good he still looked even with his facial hair unkempt and grown out. "What I think it would really look like, or what I would want it to be?"

The corner of his lips raise at your statement. You were right. For both you and him, what you want is almost never what you can get. "Either way," he shrugged.

"Well," you paused. You knew you were stalling, but you didn't really know what to say. "I guess... there was a time when I used to want the normal life. You know - a partner, kids, a lakeside house with a nice backyard, maybe a dog."

"What kind of dog?" he asked suddenly, distracting you.

"Oh, uhm, I like German Shepherds."

He smiled, "I like them too."

That one remark was enough to make your imagination run wild. He likes them too, he said. What must it be like to be with Steve, to live in a lakeside house with him? Enough, you quickly reminded yourself, stop before you get hurt.

You must have been staring at him then, because he casted a gentle glance at you, saying, "Keep going."

You found yourself continuing with more ease, "I never really had a whole family. Only lived with my parents for a time, didn't have any siblings. So when - if, and that's a big if - I do have kids, I'd want more than one. So they would always have each other, you see."

When you looked back at him, his blue eyes were arresting, almost like they're boring right into you. Captain America is trying to get a good read on you, and you feel like you're laid bare before him. But it's not a discomforting feeling.

Maybe it's just the effect Steve has on people. Or maybe it's you. You weren't ready to accept just how much you already took a liking to the Captain America. You just knew - it would not end well.

These things never do.

But then he said, "When you do manage to have all of that, will you send me a postcard? Let me know how you are?"

Your smile widened at his sincerity. He wasn't just playing along, indulging in what you think are just delusions. He actually meant it. "Steve, you'll always be welcome at our lakeside house, you know."

"Our?" he smirked.

"Yeah, well," you leaned back at his implication, but his expression is enough to warm you all over. "I... I meant, mine and my partner's or... mine and my dog's, I don't really know - "

He laughed lowly, the sound hearty and deep in his chest. "I understand what you mean," he said, before adding, "although, I definitely wouldn't mind sharing a lakeside house with you."

"And my dog," you added jokingly, but your pulse had already quickened.

He nodded, but he wasn't finished. "Could be my dog, too." You don't know whether to be grateful or disappointed that he didn't say, and our kids. Grateful, you decided. It had to be that. You were getting too ahead of yourself.

You agreed, playing along, "As long as I get to name him."

"Of course, doll."

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The 1950s, two months after Steve's arrival

Steve decides that he would get a dog.

It's about time, he believes. He's always wanted to do so anyway, and what better time than now, when he is settled in a good home base with a lot of backyard space for the dog to roam around.

He wants to get a German Shepherd, and it's fine, because Peggy does not really have a preference.

It is the evening before he is scheduled to visit the animal shelter, when Peggy asks him if he has decided on a name for the dog.

He startles at that, looking up from his plate. He barely registers her hand that has been caressing his own throughout dinner. Steve, being Steve, immediately feels ashamed at how he doesn't seem to be present and appreciating the moment.

"Have you thought of a name?" Peggy tries again.

A name, he ponders. No, he always thought he would leave it up to you.

"I'll figure it out," he says after a while, taking Peggy's hand and bringing it to his lips.

Everything will be perfect.

Read part three here.

taglist: @vicmc624 @littleliyah16 @babezawa @klammykayla @justsebstan

caution: this is will be the slowest burn, and even MORE angsty when things come to a head.

the next chapter will be from the reader's POV and how she's coping...

Are all of these dog shenanigans alluding to how the reader will walk Stevie boy like a dog??? *evil, maniacal laugh*

Taglist still open!

#steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #chris evans #the avengers #captain america #mcu #the bolter

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skyriderwednesday · 1 year ago

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So, five pounds is exactly double Mrs Warren's asking price of 50 shillings (£1 = 20s, 50s = £2 10s).

If this case is set where Baring-Gould puts it, in 1902, then she's asking the equivalent of £195 £250 and getting £390 £500.

If it's set where I think is more likely, in 1885 or earlier, then she's asking the equivalent of £165 £210 and getting £330 £420.

Assuming that Mr Warren is in trade or similar, this mysterious lodger is putting a month's wages in front of her and promising it every two weeks if she keeps to her end of the bargain.

(Edited to use 2023 numbers. Wow, there's been a lot of inflation since 2017.)

#sherlock holmes #letters from watson #the red circle #(it suddenly occurred to me that. wait. 2017 was 6 years ago. a lot's happened since then.)#(tragically we have to run helpful calculators through other helpful calculators to get accurate information now)

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sexymonstersupercreep · 3 months ago

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The Movie Gallery - favorite film posters

.... Superstition (1982) .... The Lodgers (2017) .... Escape to the Silver Globe (2021) .... The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023) .... Horsehead (2014) .... Annette (2021) .... Howl From Beyond the Fog (2019) .... Dark Water (2002) .... Zodiac (2007) .... Sauna (2008) .... Tigers Are Not Afraid (2017) .... The VVitch: A New England Folktale (2015) ....

#movie posters #poster art

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kanejw · 1 year ago

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What was read 2023

The Lottery & Other Stories - Shirley Jackson (1949~)

A Life Standing Up - Steve Martin (2007)

Blood Meridian - Cormac McCarthy (1985)

Licks of Love -John Updike (2000)

Lovesickness Collection - Junji Ito (2011)

Flowers for Algernon - Daniel Keyes (1966)

The Anarchy The relentless rise of the East India Company - William Dalrymple (2019)

The Wisdom of Insecurity - Alan W.Watts (1951)

War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy (1869)

The Course of Love - Alain de Botton (2016)

Tender is the Night - F Scott Fitzgerald (1934)

Housekeeping - Marilynne Robinson (1980)

Moby Dick - Herman Melville (1851)

A Faint Heart (1848)White Nights (1848) A Little Hero (1857)An Unpleasant Predicament (1862) The Crocodile (1865) Bobok (1873) A Gentle Spirit/The Meek One* (1876) T1877) Fyodor Dostoevsky

The Maltese Falcon - Dashiell Hammett (1929)

Haunted - Chuck Palahniuk (2005)

The Name of the Rose - Umberto Eco (1980/3)

Diary - Chuck Palahniuk (2003)

Darkness Visible - William Styron (1990)

The Poorhouse Fair - John Updike (1958)

The Sound and the Fury - William Faulkner (1929)

The First Forty-Nine Stories - Ernest Hemingway (1939)

Mythos - Stephen Fry (2017)

The Good Earth - Pearl S. Buck (1931)

The Road to Wigan Pier - George Orwell (1936)

The House of the Dead - Fyodor Dostoevsky (1861)

Walden - Henry David Thoreau (1854)

The Gambler - Fyodor Dostoevsky (1866)

Normal People - Sally Rooney (2018)

Joy in the Morning - P. G. Wodehouse (1947)

After Dark - Haruki Murakami (2004)

The Lodger - Marie Belloc Lowndes (1913)

The Thing Around Your Neck - Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (2009)

The Right Stuff - Tom Wolfe (1979)

Family Happiness - Leo Tolstoy (1859)

The Death of Ivan Ilyich - Leo Tolstoy (1866)

The Kreutzer Sonata - Leo Tolstoy (1889)

The Devil - Leo Tolstoy (1911)

Nausea - Jean-Paul Sartre (1938)

True History of the Kelly Gang - Peter Carey (2000)

Foucault’s Pendulum - Umberto Eco (1988/9)

Inferno - Dante Alighieri (~1308-1321)

Iliad - Homer (Samuel Butler translation 1898)

Carry On, Jeeves - P.G. Wodehouse (1925)

The Passenger - Cormac McCarthy (2022)

Stella Maris - Cormac McCarthy (2022)

Fear: Trump in the White House - Bob Woodward (2018)

Rubber Balls and Liquor - Gilbert Gottfried (2011)

kiss me like a stranger* - Gene Wilder (2005)

The Adventures of Auguie March - Saul Bellow (1953)

Rickles’ Book A memoir - Don Rickles (2007)

The ‘Rosy Crucifixion’ Trilogy. Sexus - Henry Miller (1949)

The Heart of a Dog - Milhaud Bulgakov (1925)

Dracula - Bram Stoker (1897)

The Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck (1939)

Albert & the Whale - Philip Hoare (2021)

A Waiter in Paris - Edward Chisholm (2022)

The Road to Oxiana - Robert Byron (1937)

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brookbee · 1 year ago

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I love lodger and her strange experimental ways

#I’ve been in a lodger appreciation mood lately #like actually wild and cool that reversing all the young dudes works so well #could be a poignant metaphor. I won’t explain it you get it probably lmao #david bowie #bowieposting #Spotify

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lucillesharpeismybaby · 9 months ago

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Rebecca (1940, because the netflix one is terrible)

Jane Eyre (2011, because Mia Wasikowska)

Mama (2013, produced by GDT and starring Jessica)

The invitation (2022, kinda cheesy but I enjoyed it)

Flowers in the attic (2014 tv series, yay mansion and incest)

The lodgers (2017, yay another mansion and incest)

We have always lived in the castle (2018)

Besides Crimson Peak, what are some good Gothic Horror films?

Ooooh, good question! Although I feel honor-bound to GDT to mention that CPeak isn't a horror movie; it's a Gothic romance by his own designation. He was kind of irritated that it got marketed as horror, actually.

Movies with similar vibes (though not always aesthetics) that I enjoy include:

The Others

Byzantium

I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives In The House

The Haunting (1963)

House of Wax (1953)

The Masque of the Red Death (1964)

Interview With The Vampire (1994- although the TV series also looks very good from what little I've seen)

The Innocents (1961)

Gaslight (1940)

Dracula's Daughter (1936)

There are a lot of vintage offerings on here, probably because Gothic is just a less popular genre for movies at the moment, it seems. Indeed, GDT cited some of those Classic Hollywood GothicsTM as his main inspiration for the movie- and for building the lavish, fully functional Allerdale Hall set

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emiliosandozsequence · 2 years ago

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the lodgers (2017) dir. brian o'malley

#the lodgers #the lodgers 2017 #brian o'malley #charlotte vega #bill milner #mine #msc #tlsc #robyn

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monstraduplicia · 2 years ago

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the lodgers (2017) dir. brian o'malley

#weirdo freak babygirl i am obsessed w you #the lodgers #the lodgers 2017 #bill milner #charlotte vega #martyr #mine #films

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haveyouseenthishorrormovie · 9 months ago

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Stats from Movies 801-900

Top 10 Movies - Highest Number of Votes

Thirst (2009) had the most votes with 1,097 votes. Captain Clegg (1962) had the least votes with 413 votes.

The 10 Most Watched Films by Percentage

Fright Night (1985) was the most watched film with 32.8% of voters out of 665 saying they had seen it. Zibahkhana (2007) had the least "Yes" votes with 0% of voters out of 444.

The 10 Least Watched Films by Percentage

The Fall of the House of Usher (1960) was the least watched film with 68.3% of voters out of 492 saying they hadn’t seen it. Sewing Love (2023) had the least "No" votes with 5,9% of voters out of 523.

The 10 Most Known Films by Percentage

Fright Night (1985) was the best known film, 14,6% of voters out of 665 saying they’d never heard of it.

The 10 Least Known Films by Percentage

Zibahkhana (2007) was the least known film, 93% of voters out of 444 saying they’d never heard of it.

The movies part of the statistic count and their polls below the cut.

Near Dark (1987) The Wrath (2018) The Uncanny (1977) Fright Night (1985) Zibahkhana (2007) My Best Friend Is a Vampire (1987) Willard (1971) Woman's Wail (1986) The Atticus Institute (2015) Resurrección (2016)

Nanny (2022) The Lodgers (2017) Dead Birds (2004) The Medium (2021) Captain Clegg (1962) The Flesh and the Fiends (1960) Hagazussa (2017) The Priests (2015) The Wailing (2016) The Devil's Doorway (2018)

House of Usher (1960) Shutter (2004) Without Name (2016) Lake Bodom (2017) The Axe Murders of Villisca (2016) Under the Shadow (2016) Southbound (2015) The Dybbuk (1937) The Golem (2018) Invaders from Mars (1986)

Birth/Rebirth (2023) Dave Made a Maze (2017) Await Further Instructions (2018) The Beast Must Die (1974) Imprint (2006) A Wounded Fawn (2022) The Housemaid (2016) Slash/Back (2022) Slumber Party Massacre (2021) Sissy (2022)

In The Spider's Web (2007) Maneater (2007) Stigmata (1999) Resurrection (2022) The Pale Door (2020) Jack Frost (1997) Return of the Fly (1959) She Will (2021) Spiral (2019) The Strange House (2020)

Mary Reilly (1996) The Binding (2020) 32 Malasana Street (2020) The Strange House (2015) Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight (2020) The Reaping (2007) The Moth Diaries (2011) Let Us Prey (2014) The Possession of David O'Reilly (2010) The Burrowers (2008)

Cruel Peter (2019) Sewing Love (2023) A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night (2014) Dr. Jekyll & Sister Hyde (1971) Darkness Falls (2003) Night Killer (1990) Mr. Harrigan's Phone (2022) Black Sunday (1960) Superhost (2021) The Puppetman (2023)

Tom at the Farm (2013) Malum (2023) Suitable Flesh (2023) The Deep House (2021) Winifred Meeks (2021) Son (2021) The Banishing (2020) Alone with You (2021) Enys Men (2022) The Unkindness of Ravens (2016)

Sennentuntschi (2010) The Queen of Spades (1949) Super Dark Times (2017) Lokis: A Manuscript of Professor Wittembach (1970) Life (2017) Citadel (2012) Creep (2004) Thirst (2009) The Canal (2014) A Tale of Two Sisters (2003)

The Innkeepers (2011) The Sacrament (2013) Apollo 18 (2011) The Outwaters (2022) Horror in the High Desert (2021) Spring (2014) The Uninvited (2009) The Grudge (2020) The Messengers (2007) Rawhead Rex (1986)

#recap #not a poll

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