#the last two aren't explicitly mention but that's still their classes

[theoreticallyliving]

okay chat what if healer (cleric?) Vernias and wizard Sophist teaching eachother spells when they're bored

what if Sophist learns to heal and to revive and Vern learns fire spell and thunder spell n stuff that's more on the offensive

what if them, Nick, and Brent were on a journey together but didn't know eachother very well, like this is a sort of found family type trope or smth, and as they start like getting used to eachother and trusting eachother, Sophist and Vern stay up late at night and talk about everything and nothing, and one night they talk about their magic and like how they learned to cast their spells, and it evolves into them sneaking away from camp (they were probs supposed to be on guard but like the others will be finee) to find someplace where they won't disturb the others while they show eachother exactly how to do each spell

what if the other two only find out after Vernias recieves a critical blow in battle, taking the last of his hearts, and they see Sophist rush over and perform a revive, in the exact same way they had seen Vern do it over and over again, with an unsure look on his face as he recalls each step in his head and prays that he doesn't somehow mess this up

Vernias waking up, a huge smile on his face, exclaiming a cheerful "you did it!" and practically tackling him to the ground with a hug

what if all that?

[utilitycaster]

It’s so interesting how spot-on you were with the thoughts about toxic Beaujes folxs fleeing to D20. The same person who’s been starting shit on twitter just found out that CR doesn’t allow mass-produced zines, and used that fact to make some batshit generalization about how “that’s why the fandom is corporatized and violent and racist towards any canon-contradicting fanon like all my beaujester friends told me and now I’m parroting it uncritically”.

So I think this might be my last post on this unless some more wild shit goes down (very possible) not because I disagree but just because I am also trying to be conscious of overshadowing my genuine excitement for The Ravening War. But yeah...like, I followed a few people who were CR fanartists until Beauyasha started happening and unfollowed them once that went down; it was extremely exhausting watching a bunch of (mostly white) people in their early 20s suddenly claim a show they'd watched over 200 episodes of was hopelessly problematic simply because their ship didn't happen. It was a truly vile combination of normal shipping drama plus appropriated social justice language about said shipping drama plus, as others have noted, middle-class white queer people [a demographic I fit into myself] shoving aside narratives about POC or working class people because they aren't explicitly queer narratives (or even narratives about queer people that aren't to their exact specifications of what queerness looks like; see people who refuse to respect Molly's pronouns or who erase Vax's bisexuality because he was primarily romantically involved with a woman).

The zine thing is fucking wild in particular for the following reasons:

The two CR-centric zines that person has mentioned as not ultimately moving forward were both zines that intended to pay the artists, ie, at least partially for profit rather than charity zines.

I am not personally in a creative industry but I've been reliably told by basically everyone who is that CR's policy is boilerplate.

CR has a pretty extensive history of showcasing and hiring fanartists; this is not opposition to fan content, which is how this wack job is attempting to portray it.

Similarly no one is devaluing fan content; they're just saying "you are throwing a big old hissy fit in public about the hypothetical scenario of The Ravening War not honoring a ship that has, and I am not joking here, six fics on Ao3 in total." (For reference: Lapin/Theo, a ship that person actively dislikes, has 56 works, which, idk I feel that's almost ten times as widely accepted fanlore.)

Their twitter currently is bragging about their cookbook zine (which as far as I know wasn't based in fanon but was just a cookbook with fanart in it) and not about their currently active charity zine (which is the one about Belizabeth and Citrina). Also that charity zine is available for free which really undercuts the "for charity" aspect. Anyway a cool thing to do is to not buy it, but just donate directly to the International Rescue Committee or your refugee-supporting charity of choice.

Anyway. This was an opportunity to rant a lot but I will leave you with this: I am not the right person, obviously, to enumerate every possible issue with CR's portrayal of characters of color nor the lack of diversity of the cast. I think discussions of racism and lack of representation in actual play are important to have. But it's telling that fanartists, specifically, who left CR over Beau and Jester not getting together but pretended this was about social justice, always seem to go to D20. Or NADDPod. Or Friends at the Table. Or have their art featured in the TAZ graphic novels. All majority white or entirely white main casts.

They rarely seem to go to, say, Rivals of Waterdeep, or Into the Motherlands, or Three Black Halflings (and those are still some of the better known examples, frankly). People complaining that Critical Role hates lesbians for having a lesbian relationship they didn't like never seem to check out The Broadswords, or use resources like this to find women-led actual play. It's about getting clicks; they want to find an existing fandom to adore them rather than use the power they claim to wield to popularize something underrated.

Anyway that's the last reason why I think I'm done for now: I think the best and most satisfying thing is to starve them of attention, and to enjoy the Ravening War and art and fic about it from fans who are happy to be here.

[akorah]

Notes on Philosopher’s Stone

Full disclosure: this is my favorite book in the series. There is something whimsical about Philosopher's Stone that JKR never captured again with the rest of the books.

Here are some haphazardly organised notes I took during my last re-read. I was specifically looking for plot holes and things that are canon v. fanon (i.e. Hermione being a bad flyer)(she's not).

The Beginning

Harry got dropped off at the Dursleys' on the morning of November 2nd, not November 1st (ch 1)

McGonagall spends all of Nov 1st scouting the Dursleys, BUT Hagrid makes it sound like he brought Harry straight from Godric's Hollow to Privet Drive. Did Hagrid have Harry for an entire day?????? (I guess a 15-month-old and a dragon egg would have roughly the same level of vulnerability.)

The Dursleys

The Dursleys owned a family computer prior to 1991, and allowed their 10-year-old to play on it (ch 2).

Now I'm imagining Dudley Dursley typing MS-DOS commands--he would have had to know terminal commands regardless if they had a PC or Macintosh--and that's messing with my head.

The Dursleys have a greenhouse: Dudley was in shock. He’d screamed, whacked his father with his Smeltings stick, been sick on purpose, kicked his mother and thrown his tortoise through the greenhouse roof, and he still didn’t have his room back. (ch. 3)

I'm genuinely shocked the Dursleys actually showed up to take Harry home from King's Cross.

Hermione realises IMMEDIATELY that the Dursleys are the literal worst: 'Hope you have -- er -- a good holiday,' said Hermione, looking uncertainly after Uncle Vernon, shocked that anyone could be so unpleasant. (ch. 17)

Textbooks

The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk - For what class? Charms? Charms & Transfiguration?

A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot - History of Magic

Magical Theory by Adalbert Waffling - ??? Charms? Transfiguration?

A Beginner’s Guide to Transfiguration by Emeric Switch - Transfiguration

One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi by Phyllida Spore - Herbology

Magical Drafts and Potions by Arsenius Jigger - Potions

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them by Newt Scamander - ??? Defence?

The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection by Quentin Trimble - Defence 

Quidditch

'What is Quidditch?' 'It's our sport.' Confirmation that the only game that exists in Britain is Quidditch. (ch 5)

Lee Jordan mentions Alicia Spinnet is a former reserve Chaser, which I think is the only time in the entire series that it's mentioned there are reserve players (ch 11). There certainly aren't any in OotP when Angelina has to replace Harry, Fred, and George, and Harry doesn't select any in HBP.

How the utter fuck did Katie take a Bludger to the back of the head and keep playing?

The Ravenclaw-Gryffindor game happened between the end of exams and when the exam results were posted. So, mid-to-end of June

Hogwarts

Hogwarts runs on a 3 term / trimester school year, not 2 semesters. This is a British thing, and is only casually alluded to throughout the series. 

Term 1: September - Christmas.

Term 2: January - Easter.

Term 3: March/April - June.

Two Quidditch matches occur per term:

Term 1: Gryffindor-Slytherin, Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw

Term 2: Gryffindor-Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw-Slytherin

Term 3: Gryffindor-Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff-Slytherin

This schedule is consistent through the series, and it's explicitly mentioned when there's a change to the schedule, like in PoA when Gryffindor goes up against Hufflepuff because Draco's being a brat about the weather during first term.

We have a pretty decent description/characterisation of the castle: There were a hundred and forty-two staircases at Hogwarts: wide, sweeping ones; narrow, rickety ones; some that led somewhere different on a Friday; some with a vanishing step halfway up that you had to remember to jump. Then there were doors that wouldn’t open unless you asked politely, or tickled them in exactly the right place, and doors that weren’t really doors at all, but solid walls just pretending. It was also very hard to remember where anything was, because it all seemed to move around a lot. The people in the portraits kept going to visit each other and Harry was sure the coats of armour could walk. (ch. 8)

Gryffindors & Slytherins have flying lessons together, which means Harry had no idea of Theo's name through Potions, flying lessons, and Care of Magical Creatures. (ch. 9) Honestly, HOW?

Potions - once a week on Fridays. Flying lessons - once a week (maximum) on Thursdays. (ch. 8/9)

Hermione got 112% on her Charms final exam, which indicates they use a standard grading scale for non-O.W.L./N.E.W.T. years, which would make sense, since the teachers explicitly state they're switching to the OWL scale in OotP

Hermione

3rd person omniscient for Hermione lighting Snape's robes on fire - fire that she managed to scoop into a jar, which meant it wasn't burning anything, just giving off heat. (ch. 11)

Hermione uses her bluebell flames to defeat the Devil's Snare, not Lumos (ch. 16)

Hermione flies, and she flies WELL, when they go to chase the key. (ch. 16)

Hermione is very physically affectionate. She loves hugs.

Hermione is explicitly stated to have come out #1 in the class: Hermione, of course, came top of the year. (ch. 17)

Ron is not an idiot, and not just because he's good at chess

Apparently Ron knows obscure laws about dragons: 'Dragon-breeding was outlawed by the Warlocks' Convention of 1709, everyone knows that.' (ch. 14)

Ron identifies what the flying key likely looks like: 'We're looking for a big, old-fashioned one, probably silver like the handle.' (ch. 16)

Ron has a bit of a hero-worship thing for Dumbledore (he’s also 12 and doesn’t know any better) (ch. 17)

The Wizarding world knows Voldemort isn’t dead

“My dad says it must’ve been a powerful Dark wizard to get round Gringotts, but they don’t think they took anything, that’s what’s odd. ‘Course, everyone gets scared when something like this happens in case You-Know-Who’s behind it.” (Ron, ch. 6)

Pure-bloods aren’t ignorant of Muggle transportation

Draco knows what a helicopter is: He complained loudly about first-years never getting in the house Quidditch teams and told long, boastful stories which always seemed to end with him narrowly escaping Muggles in helicopters. (ch. 9)

And the Ministry owns cars, per PoA, so this whole 'pure-bloods are totally ignorant of Muggle transportation' is utter bullshit.

Harry

So everyone knows Harry went off to live with Muggles, and Molly wasn't surprised to see him at King's Cross ALONE, which seems like a bit of a red flag.

Harry imitates the Bloody Baron to scare off Peeves

Harry KNOWING and justifying how Dumbledore set him up to go after Quirrellmort and the stone is absolutely horrifying (yes, I know he’s 11 and Dumbledore is an authority figure): 

“D’you think he meant you to do it?” said Ron. “Sending you your father’s Cloak and everything?”

“Well,” Hermione exploded, “if he did -- I mean to say -- that’s terrible -- you could have been killed.”

“No, it isn’t,” said Harry thoughtfully. “He’s a funny man, Dumbledore. I think he sort of wanted to give me a chance. I think he knows more or less everything that goes on here, you know. I reckon he had a pretty good idea we were going to try, and instead of stopping us, he just taught us enough to help....” (ch. 17)

Speaking of Quirrellmort

Quirrell calls Voldemort by his name (ch. 16)

Dumbledore says the whole school knows what happened between Harry and Quirrell, which seems highly unlikely. (ch. 17) So what exactly would the students been told?

Er -- 'My brother got past McGonagall's giant chess set!' (Percy, ch. 17) — So they know an awful lot.

Dumbledore was a contradictory old bastard from the start

Dumbledore: 'I'm not going to lie to you.'

Also Dumbledore: 'Ah, yes, Snape saved you because James saved him, so Snape repaid his debt so he could to go back to hating James in peace.' (ch. 17)

Other random thoughts that came up

Neville is a clumsy little cinnamon roll:

When Neville Longbottom, the boy who kept losing his toad, was called, he fell over on his way to the stool. (ch. 7)

...The portrait swung forward to reveal a round hole in the wall. They all scrambled through it -- Neville needed a leg up -- and found themselves in the Gryffindor common room.... (ch. 7)

Neville had somehow managed to melt Seamus's cauldron into a twisted blob.... (ch. 8)

Neville had never been on a broomstick in his life, because his grandmother had never let him near one. Privately, Harry felt she'd had good reason, because Neville managed to have an extraordinary number of accidents even with both feet on the ground. (ch. 9)

...and the list goes on.

Fred calls Molly "woman," and I feel like the Molly of later books would have yelled at him. (ch. 6)

The Longbottoms are fucking terrible: ‘Well, my gran brought me up and she’s a witch,’ said Neville, ‘but the family thought I was all Muggle for ages. My great-uncle Algie kept trying to catch me off my guard and force some magic out of me – he pushed me off the end of Blackpool pier once, I nearly drowned – but nothing happened until I was eight. Great-uncle Algie came round for tea and he was hanging me out of an upstairs window by the ankles when my great-auntie Enid offered him a meringue and he accidentally let go. But I bounced – all the way down the garden and into the road. They were all really pleased. Gran was crying, she was so happy. And you should have seen their faces when I got in here – they thought I might not be magic enough to come, you see. Great-uncle Algie was so pleased he bought me my toad.’ (ch. 7)

Filch is ALSO terrible, but we knew that: 'Shame they let the old punishments die out ... I've got the chains still in my office, keep 'em well oiled in case they're ever needed.' (ch. 15)

I love that Snape used logic as part of his protection. (ch. 16) Our very first hint that he was a half-blood who was raised in the Muggle world. 

Finally, Unnecessary Broomstick Discourse

I went down a rabbit hole with Quidditch Through the Ages on this one.

1926 - Cleansweep One released

1929 - Comet 140 released (first Comet broom)

1934 - Cleansweep Two released

1937 - Cleansweep Three released

1938 - Comet 180 released

1967 - Nimbus 1000 released (first Nimbus broom)

1991 - top brooms are Nimbus 2000 and Cleansweep Seven (per Oliver)

1995 - Ron gets a Cleansweep Eleven 

Sooooooo, if one were to do some sketchy math, the Cleansweep Four, Five, & Six were released over a maximum period of 52 years. Sounds like Cleansweep had a heck of a dry spell. How did they stay in business???? Let's go with the average, so one released every 13 years (lord almighty) would put it at

1950 - Cleansweep Four

1963 - Cleansweep Five

1976 - Cleansweep Six

1989 - Cleansweep Seven

Presumably, Nimbus would have been incrementally releasing new brooms. Quidditch Through the Ages states they released the 1001, 1500, and 1700, which is [1] incredibly strange versioning, and [2] odd that they could get away with releasing a total of 5 brooms in 24 years, unless broom innovation is really that slow.

If you did averages, that would put Nimbus at:

1967 - Nimbus 1000

1973 - Nimbus 1001

1979 - Nimbus 1500

1985 - Nimbus 1700

1991 - Nimbus 2000

And of course, we know the Nimbus 2001 came out in 1992, throwing all of these averages away. 

And then the Firebolt in 1993. So either broom manufacturing saw an exponential increase in the early 90s, or all of this is bullshit.