#the intro descent is beautiful tho I loved that

[mossywizard]

Oooogh a story that could’ve been so good getting drowned in just,,, redundancy and icky

[anosci]

(226-240 albums etc that I’ve listened to this year, copied from twitter) (now with art. [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17])

names and thoughts below cut

226/ Rabit - Baptizm (2015) insanely subdued intro not sure about the high pitch aliasing in "Straps" "bloody eye" is pretty wild. really dirty percussion on some warbly synths. i'm marking this as the standout in a cool, moody EP

---

227/ Common Creation - Sunset Seance (2023) lower tempo + breaks on top of a wobby sound. my favorite :D i think this is the type of sound SGX would make if he were active today. big beats, beefy bass, lush chord textures flitting beneath it all. it's a delight

---

228/ VA - Infloresce & Friends Charity Festival (2023) poor "Gentle Leafy Road", cute banger with a late penalty "make it make sense" bbbbbbbbanger "just existing (in a good way)" talk about good vibes wowow. personal winner tho "Together" is a well deserved actual 1st place.

---

229/ VA - YEA VIDEOGAME (2023) as usual, a grab bag. some personal highlights: "coaxed from the ether" beej is kicking ass god damn "cow descent" hmm yes this is bang er. "Skyscraper Playground" yeah!! bounce!! "KirbYEAdventure" i adore how well this captures the CUTE of kirby

---

230/ VA - TINYMOD GRANDPRIX (2023) as usual, mixed bag etc etc. 2 hilights: (4k) "3n14ks24k4u" is insane for its size. basically just a good song in general. (48k) "light dinner 6" !!! the most nagz&vhiiula sounding thing ive heard in 20 years. holy shit!

---

231/ VA - BotB Advent Calendar 2022 (2023) absolute grabbag ofc. ighlights: (c64) "FL Studio SUX" oh holy shit that's a certified BANGER. EZ fav (fakebit) "Rooftop Wealth Gap RPG" hits that midi itch but a little harder. (zxbeep) "Beepbeep Hoedown" astoundingly soft for 1bit wtf

---

232/ VA - Spring Tracks XII (2023) mixed bag ofc. hilits: "Ophanim" ae-esque! twisting and turning and unfolding! slightly too long but like. god damn. "witness protection" gets its title bc all the ppl responsible for this scoring so low are in [title]. "GENERAL SERUM" hey wtf.

---

233/ VA - Winter Chip XVIII (2023) mixed bag etc. personal hi lites: "10 Celsius Winter" crunchy! "not here" spooky wild textures. i love warble. "Echonomicon" basically magic. 90idm hella. "Status Chill" yooooooooooo

---

234/ Aphex Twin - Blackbox Life Recorder EP (2023) the title "in a room" captures the overall vibe of this EP: lax. parallax mix feels the most like an dusty artifact from the archives (in a cool way) kinda loose overall but happy to have another drop of afx

---

235/ Tigran Hamasyan - Mockroot (2015) there's a certain intensity to these vamps. its often followed by serenity. i feel like a picky eater when i say this but i swear some of these songs (f.ex "Entertain Me") would kick ASS with a metal timbre. anyway: "The Grid".

---

236/ Starkey - Odyssey Five (2016) lush, slightly haunting. deeply nighttime music. "Tropical" is a misleading title for a wild and spooky banger. check out those BENDS. probably personal highlight? not to discount the more atmospheric stuff but…

---

237/ Oval - Popp (2016) yeah i guess it is a little more pop, huh. "ku" has the wild soundscape, transient weirdness, and pitch bends that feels 100% like what oval would make in 2016. perhaps fav? id call that a representative track anyway. shoutout to "fu"'s chops as well

--- August ---

238/ Lanark Artefax - Windox Rush (2015) "it's like afx" oh damn it rly is is that detuned chords too??? might just be lush but i think there's detuning here. "The Angel Problem" prolly fav. overall more "chill" than "electro" but still.

---

239/ hizmi - Soak (2021) absolutely unthinkable that this is coming purely from a stock X68000?????? it sounds so full of intention. insane. beautiful. "Rivulet" is just an unrestrained ilkae track like cmon

---

240/ Skee Mask - Shred (2016) smooth like a cold drink. title track "Shred 08" is kind of the outlier, being actually heavy. feels like a melody-deprived version what i expected bblr to be lol sorry rdj. i think the fuzzy clickyness of "HAL Conv." is my fav tho

---

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[mcnuggyy]

As a white person and budding artist (that sure is. An intro) I'm always super careful to try and avoid harmful cultural and visual stereotypes in my art and practice sketches. I was wondering if you have/have posted any tips for drawing mexican people? I always do research before drawing anyone from a different culture or of a different race but it can be tricky to find things written by theae minorities themselves and I am always hesitant to take tips from another white artist on drawing other races 😅 (I also apologise if I worded anything badly here, I'm autistic and struggle to word things sometimes! Please feel free to correct me if I did!)

Heyo! I think the biggest reason there isn’t or even I haven’t ever made a how to draw Mexicans is ‘cause Mexico is very very diverse, and the majority of us are Mestizo ( “mixed race, especially one having Spanish and indigenous descent.”) There are definitely racist stereotypes to avoid such as orange skin, thick black mustache, lazy, alcoholic, poncho wearing, Mexican. Obviously. But this is just one small part of the coin, when there is a lot of anti-blackness, and anti-indigenous sentiments in our own communities, EVEN THOUGH, the majority of us ARE mixed race. This has to do with colonization, and the way the Spaniards just really fucked us over, brain washed us, and made being a White Mexican the IDEAL Mexican. So there’s a LOT to unpack there. 

Especially with Mestizos being prejudice towards their Indigenous communities WHILE STILL practicing the very same important practices that came from those communities (Dia De Muertos for example) Basically there’s an issue of still wanting to be Mexican, and have pride in your country, and culture, but not wanting be like those "dirty brown” Mexicans. To the point where the government is constantly trying to push the “we are all one Mexican race and nation” while actively trying to get people to essentially erase our Indigenous communities. Like there’s this big idea of “marrying White” that even my mom used to believe in for a while, because her own mother taught her that as well in order to assimilate and what not.  Again, lots of colorism and bigotry within our own communities. It’s a very big and complex issue, that we can thank the Spaniards for ( and the Mexican government who continues to uphold these toxic ideas), YAYY colonization!!! Weeee!!!!

( I mean I can even see it in my own family, with my dad’s side of the family clearly not being able to pass as White being severely impoverished, while my mom’s side of the family, who overall is much more White passing, have been able to hold positions of power in large companies and can even afford to buy more than one house)

Sorry to get into that very long rant, but I do think it’s very important to know this information to get started with actually figuring out how to accurately portray a Mexican, Tejano, Mex-Am, Afro-Mexican etc. Because well, anyone can be Mexican, just like anyone can be American! But I’ll get into the main communities that exist in Mexico to help you out!

So again, Mestizos (mixed-race) are the biggest group in Mexico, making up over 93% of the population! So that’s a good chunk of us jaja! So it’s good to talk about how different you can look in a mixed-race family! And what better example than my own family!

Both my parents look very “stereotypically” Mexican by American standards, especially my dad who is the absolute definition of a macho ranchero Mexicano jaja. Both my parents come from small farming communities in Mexico, but look very different themselves! Each pueblo kinda has their own differences too! The people from my mom’s pueblo all tend to have much lighter skin, with cool undertones, some even have blue or green eyes, and red hair! While the people from my dad’s pueblo (98 people in total there, very very small jajaja) Tend to have deep red undertones, thick dark hair, curly hair, hooked noses, and very very rarely hazel eyes! So it’s no wonder me and my siblings look so different as well! (none of us are adopted I assure you) 

So I’m very lucky cause I have a HUGE family to use as reference, and reference is key!!! but there are many cool Mexican celebrities and public figures you can use as reference if you don’t happen to know anyone (tho It’s always good to have friends with different experiences from your own as always)

But here’s some examples of how different mestizos can look, including some of my own specific references!

There is also our Indigenous communities “ Mexico's indigenous population is one of the two largest in the Americas (only Peru is comparable in size). More than one in ten Mexicans speaks an indigenous language”

I really recommend checking out this website to learn more, as this is something I’m still learning more about myself! 

Then of course we have our Afro-Mexican community! Mexico is cruel to it’s Indigenous communities, but even more so to Afromexicanos, who until recently were completely ignored by Mexico’s census. You can read more about this issue here.  Spaniards of course play a big part in the issues that face Afromexicanos today.  You can learn even more about this history here!

Did you know Lupita Nyong’o is Mexican! (A fellow Lupita <3 )

And of course, can’t forget White Mexicans! Don’t think the Spaniards just left after a while, because they stayed jajaja. (Look no further than Novellas and most big celebrates for some examples fhhffhf) 

So there really is no absolute way to represent us! (which was an issue I had with Coco actually.. with everyone having the exact same orange/brown skin) There is certainly a picture that comes to American’s heads when they think “Mexican” but in reality, things are much more diverse, beautiful, and complicating than that! 

However I do have some small little things I personally like to do to help indicate when I’m making a Mexican / Mex-Am character design based off of all of the information above along with my family and friends as reference! 

Moles! I don’t know why, but every Latino I know has so many moles.... from my childhood friends to my ex boyfriend, to every single cousin have... MOLES MOLES MOLES! Why? I haven’t a clue, but I always add them to my character designs jajaja! Even if it’s just a little one on the neck <3

Thick hair! It is a curse and a blessing. My grandpa will never bald compared to a white man, but in exchange I have to deal with shaving my chin every day to compensate LMAO. So I like giving my characters thick eyebrows, dark body hair, or thicker hair than most designs! It’s cool and neat!!! But please be mindful about how you do this as there have been white artists who have done this in racist and harmful ways, such as rcdart. ( X ) ( X ) 

I also recommend checking out shows like El Tigre, and Victor y Valentino, for some more fun and simple designs that show a wide variety of Mexican characters! (Also I just love Jorge R Gutierrez’s designs in general jaja)

Hope this helps! <3

[childlikemperor]

Do you have any fantasy book recs? :o Or book recs in general? I feel like you have immaculate taste!

yes i do and thank you so much for asking/thinking i have good taste

Ok so I'm just getting back into fantasy so I only have two book recs and a half for that particular genre

I just finished Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo on tuesday and i loved it so much, but theres a trigger warning for csa and sa so please please be mindful! This is the first "dark academia" book i read that managed to not be the most pretentious shit in the world, its about meddling with death and magic in Yale secret societies!!

Everyone already knows I love Peter Darling by Austin Chant, its a Peter Pan retelling where Peter is trans and goes back to Neverland all grown up and falls in love with Captain Hook (yes i know i promise it isnt weird its perfect)

My half rec is Middlegame by Seanan McGuire only bc im not done with it yet but I'm 68% in and loving it... its the kind that you gotta pay attention to bc there's time travel and some dense expository dialogue but I managed to understand it p well so far even tho i zoned out a couple times... this is basically umbrella academy: dallas (the show doesnt exist to me) meets wizard of oz with clones!! trust me its so cool... also literally found family

Also, speaking of found family and moving out of fantasy into horror-ish sorta sci-fi pls get into The Dark Descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein by Kiersten White theres no actual dark descent all the marketing is lying BUT there is found family and Viktor Frankenstein bashing so what more can you ask for in a Frankenstein retelling (which btw pls read if you havent, theres like 3 different free audiobooks on LibreVox if classics are hard to get into for you)

Still in that vibe I super recommend Wilder Girls by Rory Power its about monster girls in a boarding school trying to survive and the fact that it was YA didnt actually ruin it for me

Also speaking of sci-fi This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone is everyone's darling for a reason so if you havent already bc ik time travel can be p iffy, trust me that its p easy to keep up even if you dont fully understand the mechanics of it all, plus the prose is so gorgeous... i especially recommend it for people trying to read "real books" who love and miss that vibe that really really good fanfic has!

Finally is a horror classic that, as with all true horror classics, isnt super scary: PLEASE READ The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson ITS SO BEAUTIFUL!!! If you feel like you've gone your whole life looking for a home, looking for connection and understanding... please please read it! Ellie gets us and shes our best friend!

So yeah, if anyone is intro thrillers i can rec that too at some point just hmu

[ajokeformur-ray]

I watched Joker tonight and typed out my thoughts as they occurred to me. Unedited; typos are guaranteed. I did this a few months ago and really enjoyed looking back at my thought process and I wanted to do it again so that I can look back and know that what I feel is real and true in my darkest times.

You're welcome to skip this; it's under a cut for ease of doing so. Warnings for occasional sexual comment lmao. There’s no self shipping in this, I don’t think.

word count: 2, 575.

I’M SOBBING and I’ve only just pressed play.

Heart squeeze Chest much ow

THERE HE IS

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nooooo baby omg don’t pretend - let yourself hurt if it hurts. Don’t pretend. 

Carnival Carnival Carnivalllllllll 😍😍😍😍😍

I am a Simp for one clown and his name is Carnival

Someone help him, I????

That sign hit Arthur as hard as my love for him did ksksksk

MY EYES BE LEAKIN💔💔💔💔💔

bb nooooo

Oh honey let me kiss those bruises and replace the marks of violence with love, hm? You’re safe with me.

Breathe, my love. Don’t fight the laughter. Let it out, let yourself go. 

Screams into a pillow because????? much sad must kiss

“have you been keeping up with your journal?” LIKE HE HAS TIME

oHHHHH boi’s close to losing his shit

Do it, Artie. Give ‘em hell.

“I think I did” YOU TELL HER!!💖💖💖

I want to be his cigarette. Where’s Satan??? I got a new deal for my blackened soul which he took at half price😂😂😂😂

I’d have my hand between the door and his head so fuckin fast I swear

“I just don’t wanna feel so bad anymore” yep SAME

ohhhh peekaboo🥺🥺🥺

this makes me giggle ksksksk i watch this scene when i feel sad bc it always makes me happy for the time it’s on

he’s so good with kids; he doesn’t have to try and think about what’s funny, he just does it, he’s himself and it works

FUCK OFF LADY CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S STRUGGLING????

give

him

back

his

card

casually wrinkling my nose against tears lmao

ohhh the way he looks up at those stairs from the bottom

i can feel his exhaustion

me too, my love

step step step step

god i wanna get him the fuck outta gotham

and into my arms and a soft, warm blanket

“eat. you need to eat” LITERALLY WHAT I TELL MYSELF EVERY DAY IN HIS VOICE BC OTHERWISE I JUST WOULDNT EAT???? I’m losing so much weight asdfghjk its not enough tho

SUPAH RATS

Did Arthur come up w that joke or was it actually a Murray joke????

HIS VOICE IS SO SOFT IM CRY??🥺🥺🥺🥺

“I WAS PUT HERE TO SPREAD JOY AND LAUGHTER”

YOU DO BABY, YOU DO!!!! EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!!

go deepthroat a cactus randall - youre already a bit of a prick so🙃🙃🙃

“THE GUYS THINNK YOU’RE A FREAK BUT I LIKE YOU”

HOYT. YOU CAN GO SIT ON A CACTUS TOO

FUCK OFF

😡😡😡😡

“WHY WOULD ANYONE STEAL A SIGN”//”WHY DOES ANYONE DO ANYTIHNG?” HOYT YOU’RE SO FUCKING ILLOGICAL HERE IM????? ERIKA DOES NOT (ALSO WILL NOT LMAO IM A STUBBORN BIITCH) COMPUTE

Can arthur fuck me like he pounds the trash/????🥵🥵👀

those dark curls.... that crooked tooth... must kiss.🥺🥺🥺

pennys casual cruelty makes me so fucking angry

foreshadowingggggg ~  *JAZZ HANDS*

ugh the way he dances with that gun im👀🥵🥵🥵

he enjoys the power of it and his breathing gets deeper asdfghjk

clumsy baby omggggg i just COOED 🥺🥺🥺🥺

okay maybe im stupid but i genuinely dont understand this “senior who needs to graduate” skit i’m??? how is being an intro to western civ student funny im???? someone explain???

but also dont bc fuck that guy lmao arthur’s hilarious

true millenial humour (and brit humour lmao we’re dark asf)

THE WAY ARTIE TWIRLS HIS FINGERS AROUND HIS HAIR AND DANCES IN HIS SEAT IM???🥺🥺🥺

wanna curl up on his lap at night when hes writing and go to sleep with a 

blanket around our bodies🥺🥺🥺🥺

when arthur wears a shirt at home you KNOW it’s a daydream

THAT CROOKED TOOTH IM WANT KISS.

WAIT IS IT CALLED STAND UP COMEDY BC YOU STAND UP... AND ITS COMEDY???

23 FUCKING YEARS, PEOPLE... TO REALISE THAT🙄

WHEN CARNIVAL CAME ON SCREEN I NTHE HOSPITAL I MADE A PORNOGRAPHIC NOISE LMAO I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

IF YOURE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, SHOOT MURRAY

WOOPS WRONG LYRICS

😂

“doctor of laughter”🥺🥺🥺🥺

doctor i have a case of the Big Sad can you... do an exam? 😉😏

NO BB DONT BEAT YOUR HEAD UP THERES PRECIOUS CARGO IN THERE

in what world does chucking cold greasy chips in a girls hair being “nice”???

lmao fuck these guys

ohhh honey breathe. dont fight it, my love, just breathe.

my heart’s breaking for you, you sweet thing🥺🥺🥺

i love you so so so so so so so much ugh you’re an actual fucking angel

just breathe darling

i need to get you a cup of tea with honey in it, your throat must be so sore

ohhhh baby im so sorry

i’d take every single punch if i could

i’d die for you

i wish i could protect you

i wish i could look after you

and take all those hits

and kill those guys for you

im so sorry

sobbingggg

YES GOOD MAN THANK YOUUU

KILL THOSE ASSHOLES LMAO DESERVED IT

yeah i have a grey morality... im similar to deadpool in that way tbh

carnival comin’ to kill your insecurities

8 bullets in a 6 chamber???? mm-hm

DONT FORGET YOUR BAG THATS EVIDENCE

AND THE WIG

RUN BABY RUNNNNNNN

GO GO GO GOOOOOOOOOOOO

RUN LIKE THE WIND BULLSEYE

THE SOUND OF HIS FEET SLAPPING THE PAVEMENT IM👀

OOOOOH JOKER’S WAKIN’ UUUUUUP

fuck he’s so hypnotic

the way he runs his hand down his lower stomach asdfghj🥵

must kiss the inner tendons on his wrists and lick the blood off his face 

must kiss

he moves like water

fuck hes so fluid

bathroom scene = the scene in which my heart and vagina clench at the same time

im WANT

T POSEEEEEEEE

“i still owe you for that, dont i?”

PUNCH OUT IS MY FAVOURITE THING E  V  E  R

D O N T S M I LE

UGH I FUCKING HATE being told to smile if i don’t fucking want to so BIG mood

PLEASE SHUSH ME THE WAY YOU JUST SHUSHED PENNY IM???

but also dont lmao bc i’ll think you’re mad at me and i’ll hide in the bedroom for the rest of the day lmao i’m sensitive✨✨✨

i wanna sit on his lap and still his bouncing knees

“thats not funny”

fuck off penny yes it is

I JUST CHOKED ON MY COFFEE IM???

“but i do” god the  P O W E R

ugh that fucking sexist piece of shit comedian can choke “women look at sex like buying a car” 🤢🤮🤢🤢🤮

chauvinistic pigs can die thanks

his lil trip upstage im cry🥺🥺🥺

ohhh baby. just breathe, darling. it’s okay to be scared. dont fight it. just breathe. 

he and i both cover our mouths when we laugh/smile in the exact same way and it makes me feel closer to him

how can they think hes laughing at himself when hes literally gagging????

people only see what they wanna

the Penny imitation is👌👌👌

s m i l e

i remember when i came home from seeing this for the first time, i got home and dropped to my knees to cry in the bathroom. it was such an emotional release and so much love and i played smile to try to make myself smile but i only made myself cry harder lmaooooo ~ 

smile and thats life are my go-to songs if i gotta cheer tf up

danger sign = neither works

he looks so soft after his “date”🥺🥺🥺

“thats life” yeah but murray you dont even leave the studio so how do you know????

ngl arthur’s anger scares me.

anyone so much as raise their voice at me and i’ll cry really bad and i will shut myself away for the rest of the day and quiet anger terrifies me so his banging abt in the kitchen would freak me tf out😲

angry bb😭

he controls his anger so fast though omgggg ~ 

that soft please sends me

idk where it sends me lmao

down below probably

BARE FACED CARNIVAL OMG THIS SCENE IS SO CUTE

I LOVE THE MATCHING COLOURS ON ARTHUR AND BRUCE TOO ???

okay but the implication that arthur always carries a clown nose on him is🥺🥺🥺

hes such a good clown im?????

lmao im enjoying the show more than bruce is skskskk

arthur’s lil chuckle makes me🥺

his HUMMING im??? soft?????

his brows are so strong and dark omggg ~ he’s so beautiful

OKAY i’ll be honest i’ve seen this alfred/bruce scene and the thomas bathroom scene later on and the penny flashback scene a 100 times and i still dont fucking understand what did or didnt happen regarding arthur’s parentage im????

 ive seen interpretations to say he is thomas’ son and some to say he isnt and i still cant decide so? im stupid i guess 🙃

“a clown thing?” the  s a s s

“it’s exit only” yeah so’s my ass🙃

if i was there in the hospital room i woulda turned that tv off as soon as i realised what clip was gonna play

murray’s cruelty is d i s g u s t i n g

lmao hes an asshole

arthurs lil clap from joyyyyy ~ 🥺🥺🥺

did i say murray???

i meant  m u r r a t

🙃🙃🙃

sneaky baby

wayne hall either has super bad security or arthurs v quick on his feet

🤔🤔🤔🤔

he looks so good in red omggg ~ 

f o r e s h a d o w i n g

arthurs smile when hes watching chaplin is how he smiles when we all gush to each other abt him and ourselves!!!

hes so cuuuuuute🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰

“told me what” 

ohhhh honey🥺🥺 im so sorry. “crazy” is a trigger word for arthur; it made him start laughing in the bathroom with thomas

“touch my son again ill fucking kill you” yeah?? touch my arthur again and i’ll fucking kill you🙃🙃🙃🙃

^^^ that ones a joke do not come at me

the clerk in arkham was nice to arthur - he, gary and sophie are the good gothamites.

none of it was enough to stop his descent into joker, though, and i’d even say it was too late right at the beginning of the film, too... 

his sock puppet thingy “they cut all those” is such a Joker thing to doooo ~ 

the way arthur’s laughing in the hall at arkham turns into sobbing is gut-wrenching omg the poor thing😭

i wanna hug him and protect him and help him to process this in a healthy way

sweetheart, if i could take all of your pain and put it onto me... i so would. i’d do it in a heartbeat.

i wanna get you into a hot shower, make you some food and sit and listen to you. we can either sit in silence or you can talk to me, my love, and you will be heard and understood and loved.

“i had a bad day”

IT’S OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY OMG YOU POOR SWEET INNOCENT THING IM LOVE YOU🥺💔

THAT ENTIRE LATE NIGHT SCENE LAUGH/SOBBING GOT ME -

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i just wanna hold you and protect you and help you and love you

I’m so fucking sorry, darling. i wish i could take it all away from you

“i havent been happy one minute of my entire fucking life”

NO ONE SHOULD LOOK THAT ANGELIC AFTER COMMITING MATRICIDE IM????

get

that

fucking

gun

away

from

your

face

boi dont test me ill fucking go feral or - no, tell you what, i’ll point the gun at me and see how you like it

im looking respectfully at the green speckled undies scene....👀👀👀

“coming” 😏😏😏

“my mum died im celebrating” and “i stopped taking my medication” and you STILL stayed in the apartment with Arthur????? dudes those are 🚨🚨🚨 signs

woe betide anyone who underestimates arthur fleck lmaoooo

randalls death scene makes me laugh every time omg i feel so vindictive

get WRECKED

i wanna lick the blood off his face. i really want to

ngl i think i have a blood kink... 

“dont look just go” ME WITH MY ACNE WHEN I SEE IT IN THE MIRROR 😂😂😂😂

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER 

ASDFGHJKL

J

O

K

E

R

ERIKA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERRRRRR

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 MY BABY MY MAN OMG THERE HE IS IM CRY???????😭🥺😭🥺😭🥺

my mind is literally blank rn im just staring and crying and smiling so hard my face hurts????? im love him so so so so much

sweet thing’s so used to pain he gets HIT BY A CAR AND KEEPS GOING????

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

hghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

euirrrrrrgkjbgkfbirsghigrbugr

*incoherent keyboardsmash to portray utter love*

ohhh baby no dont cry. oh honey😭 i wanna sit on your lap and kiss your tears away

“i love dr sally”

you have a WIFE at home

“DO YOU REMEMBER?” THAT WAS YOUR CUE TO APOLOGISE LMAO GET FUCKED MURRAT

he’s so CUTE

omgggg ~ 

my hearts gonna give out its SQUEEZING SO HARD IT HURTS

YOU MOCK THEM, BABY!!! THEY GOT IT COMING

“i wanna get it right” hes so passionate

my comments have deceased in number bc im just too starstruck and in love to even think clearly lmao

jokers all i know rn and this is the most peaceful ive felt in WEEKS

im sobbing

ugh fuck this hurts so BAD

youre speaking the truth, darling. im so so proud of you and i love you so much

“THEY COULDNT CARRY A TUNE TO SAVE THEIR LIVES” LMAO INSIDE JOKESSS

literally sobbing right now ugh what the fuck youre in so much pain and in the middle of a breakdown and no one saw you

ugh baby im so sorry, you deserve so much better

you tried so hard and you were gonna fall no matter what

IN THE WHITE ROOM

“hi” baby they cant hear you but im COOING 🥺🥺🥺🥺

you’re so fucking cute

say the word and ill burn gotham to the fucking ground for you

i wanna sit atop that car and cradle your head in my lap and wipe the blood off your face and help you stand up and be there for you and and and😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love you so so so much. 

i’d be so much worse off without you in my life. you brought a splash of colour which has never dimmed or faded. it never will. 

b l o o d    s m i l e

=

im wearing my inside on the outside now and it still hurts

angel💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i see you and your pain. i love you.

i see you, angel. 

his genuine laughter is🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

that cute lil “ksksks” he does im🥺🥺🥺

i always laugh with him omg the two of us are laughing together ugh its the closest i will ever get to sharing in his joy

 t h a t ‘s    l i f e

i love the hallway daaaaaaaaaaaaaance ~ 

them hips dont lie😉😉😉

i love you i love you i love you i love you omg the sun’s like a halo ugh i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you im singing along to thats life while i type out how much i love you at 220am lmaooooo ~ 

i   l o v e    y o u

[kae-karo]

marianas trench: phantoms

the absurd album overanalysis, commentary, and ranking nobody asked for

first, my personal ranking (don’t get me wrong tho i love the entire damn album):

1. wish you were here 1. don’t miss me 1. the death of me 2. your ghost 2. the killing kind 3. only the lonely survive 3. echoes of you 4. glimmer 4. i knew you when 4. eleonora

the album as a whole: oh such an awesome story and so awesomely inspired by the horror genres?? i think some of the non-singles hit the horror mark better but like oh my god it’s such a cool vibe the whole entire thing???? i know the concept was like,,,,,,descent into madness but you can totally feel this struggle with it and with the idea of a doomed/dead relationship, it’s just so so well done??? my one complaint is that i’m not musically inclined enough to recognize where all the references are bc unlike in no place like home and dearly departed, there aren’t really as many lyric references to other albums/songs, it’s more the music. and i know it well enough to go ‘oh that’s familiar, for sure’ but i can’t for the life of me figure out where from (in most cases)

eleonora: i mean the title is based on the short story by edgar allan poe (x) true to theme from the beginning, which (long story short) is about a woman the narrator falls in love with (well, his cousin) but she’s ill and will die, blah blah blah she does and the narrator vows never to marry anyone else but later he does and his first love comes back from beyond the grave to give her blessing for the new marriage - already basically i’m getting vibes of like,,,,,,a genuine desire to move on? which is great imo and like a step forward from previous albums? plus the whole acapella delivery is super reminiscent of so it goes (x) and the layered voices reminiscent of the intro to end of an era (x). plus we have the direct ref to the raven (x) by poe with ‘midnight dreary’. also the idea of ‘don’t hush’ which is later touched on as ‘just hush’ in the killing kind? oof interesting v v interesting

only the lonely survive: a bop a massive bop but! also! just a very intriguing take (at least to me) on a doomed-to-fail relationship, the idea that you can actively acknowledge a relationship is hurting both parties but...choose to stay. i also like the idea (which i might just be extrapolating) that to truly live, to have a really poignant relationship, you have to sort of give yourself over to it? ‘only the lonely survive’ - only those who isolate themselves truly ‘get out alive’ if you will but like, that’s the beauty of putting yourself out there? is like, you truly feel everything, i guess. ‘it hurts like hell to love this well’ sort of touches on that same idea for me. anyway the whole thing goes hard as hell and i love it. ‘he’ll never know you / not the way that i knew you’ we love intra-album references !!!

echoes of you: okay didn’t love this at first bc it felt repetitive (and it was coming on the heels of only the lonely survive which i adored) but it also felt really unique and a little different? when the released it as a single, it’s the first time i thought of this album as truly horror-inspired and totally picked up on the tell-tale heart vibe (x) which was just so interesting, i love how stories like that have turned into these really fresh songs that still call back to these kinds of madness-inspiring stories - that a love can inspire that kind of madness, even when it’s gone. i also wonder if the idea of ‘can’t stop myself from falling now’ has less to do with falling in love (which is, for me, the immediate connotation) and more to do with ‘falling into madness’. the verses and the tempo are so well-paced as well, like this frantic feeling? then the chorus comes in with this suspenseful set of chords? and the theremin in the background!!!! the best way to give a truly Spooky™ vibe. the idea of tell-tale heart, the story, too, is that the narrator is trying to sound completely sane, and explain the murder they’ve committed and why it was justified - that goes along with the theme of this album, too, where there’s this undercurrent of trying to insist that the doomed relationship is somehow justifiable

don’t miss me?: oh i adore this and the idea of ‘oh hah yeah no i don’t miss you like at all,,,,,,,,,,,,,do you ‘not miss me’ too?’ and like this,,,,,,not obsession but the idea of trying to actively move past missing someone? but just constantly getting caught up on it? unrelated to the meaning but oh my god the little background vocals, adore it. ‘some people try to raise the dead / some people try to live instead’ is like. that’s one of those things that i lowkey would love to get tattooed on my body or something. just really good words, because that’s what it’s like moving on from a rough relationship - and it’s hard to like, see that when you’re in the thick of it? bc like imagine losing a loved one and trying to bring them back to life - we’ve all heard the story, it’s never what’s expected, it’s never quite right and the same goes for relationships. and so, the idea of living instead, of moving on. also the vocal run up to the high note toward the end (x - look idk Music Words) reminds me of something but i can’t quite place it. also ‘i don’t remember why we stayed’ and then in wish you were here, we get ‘i don’t recall now why we’re buried’ which is a fun contradiction

wish you were here: that middle-of-the-night madness that goes alongside one love (x) like,,,,,if you took it one step on the other side of madness and entertained the idea of reviving a relationship that should be dead. except it’s such a bop unlike one love, like it sounds a lot like it could be on astoria, and it’s got that back beat matching this means war (x) in fact, it feels like the exact polar opposite of this means war (like...instead of ‘lmao i’m totally awesome without you’ it’s like ‘i’m,,,,,maybe not doing so great without you, shit i really wish you were here, wish we were together’)? but with the same sort of vibe in terms of the music itself? and the outro (x) reminds me hardcore of something else i can’t quite place

your ghost: this one also reminds me a lot of the general vibe of astoria with hints of like. modern touches? this one reminds me a lot of wildfire actually? (x) but a bit more upbeat? like that guitar style i think is what does it. it feels a lot like there’s this...almost unwilling pull toward the idea of ‘madness’ that they’re focused on, like....a sort of awareness of the descent? also the softer bit toward the end where it’s just josh and the guitar (x) reminds me a lot of something that i once again cannot place for the life of me

glimmer: oh no,,,,,,,,,okay first this (it’s just audio but tumblr won’t let me add audio on its own in a post like this):

so my first and most important comment is that all i can think about when i hear this song is ‘halo by beyonce halo by beyonce halo by beyonce halo by beyonce’ and it tends to run over everything else lmao. but! i think conceptually it’s more of that descent into madness, into seeing some sort of trace of a relationship, like some sort of residual glimmer that sticks to things, to people. ‘it’s funny what you find when you go without’, like the idea of....probably hallucinating in a sense, but starting to see the relationship/the other person everywhere, on everything, when you’re missing them? even to the point that, when the person comes back, maybe the memories of that relationship stick around too - ‘you’ve changed but it’s not enough / and doubt is insidious / creeps up on you softly / i can’t get it off me, i can’t get it off me now’ like this idea that even though it’s something wanted, to come back together (no matter how bad it might end up), memories and the past can’t really be forgotten - ‘you’ve changed but it’s not enough’ - very reminiscent of wildfire (x - ‘so now you show up when you’re alone again / but we haven’t changed, but now you’re interested) ngl too the overall feeling of the song reminds me of one love? (x)

i knew you when: so this song sorta came out of nowhere to me, like it felt weird and off-kilter like...i knew you when? when what? but like. now it makes a lot more sense, in this sort of...well, twisted way. it feels like things have been twisted around. it comes off the back of glimmer, too, and i think that’s like - oh, these memories are here, lingering, and this is almost a deep-dive into them? it tells a bit of a story and i think it’s less abstract, but it definitely harps hard on the idea that ‘i’ve been loving, loving you too long to just sudden-suddenly move on from this’ that sort of encompasses the entire album really cleanly. it’s interesting, actually, it almost feels like a very sincere moment of clarity and specificity amidst a mess of this drifting toward ‘madness’, but still hinting at that little bit of ‘okay but if you want to....i’ll know you then’, this like concession to that madness, an indulgence in it? 

the death of me: oh catch me melting over the transition between songs, utterly seamless. love it. this one is another one that like....feels like a breath of clarity in awareness? like this acknowledgment that there’s something off, this lingering desire for someone from the past, that there’s an emptiness, that this new thing isn’t right, even if it’s something wanted. because other wanted things (or people) make it impossible. i think it’s also the first time in a while where another party (ie not them nor the person they’ve got this tangled relationship with throughout the album so far) is mentioned which is v interesting. i think this track does an excellent job of bringing a ghostly vibe to it, the echoing vocals and background sounds, they almost elicit this feeling of like. the person is drifting away from the person they’re trying to make a new start with, like literally drifting? almost being pulled in by the ‘madness’? and it’s a heartbreaking song, too, bc there’s this emanating desperation to like...move on? and make things work? but this acknowledgement that...maybe that’s not happening? maybe it’s not possible? maybe there’s too much baggage, in a sense? there’s also that very long outro that starts off a little intriguing, adventurous almost, and then descends into this frightening crescendo (x - that also has a hint of something else in it) before these voices come in, crescendoeing again into this sudden stop and then you’ve got josh saying ‘save me from myself’ which i feel like is a reference?????? also cannot believe they made me download that and reverse it so i could figure that out lmao

the killing kind: it wouldn’t be a mt album without a song that’s all over the place and somehow still cohesive and intriguing, huh? oh big mood for the intro, with the very great imagery of wandering a haunted house at night, staring into the shadows, and then ‘the killing kind’ - i think the whole thing is a super interesting concept, again, this acceptance of some of the fault in a failed relationship? ‘but you’ve been haunted too’ and yet not all of it, i think a lot of media represents things as black and white, with all the blame on one person, when that’s rarely the case? anyway, it’s interesting it’s addressed. ‘nevermore’ of course being another edgar allan poe reference (disclaimer there may be other references i’m missing since i’m not massively well-read in the horror genre) i’m also intrigued by ‘can’t get out / from under it / nevermore to leave here’, is that a lover dearest (x) reference? bc that’s what came to mind, honestly. again, excellent with the background vocals giving that eerie vibe. and then the stephen king ‘it’ reference with ‘we all float down here’. ngl that one feels a little forced but again, i’m like. not well-read in the horror genre so there may be more layers to that one than i know. ‘it gazes back / sings to me / i know my love can be the killing kind’ - i think this is interesting that it sings back, that feels very much like a callback that maybe their own previous songs are hinting at the love being ‘the killing kind’. also ‘you should never be here’ makes me think of something (x) the hard guitar/violins in the background during ‘here and now / this is it’ etc remind me of something else. and then ofc we have the astoria run/vocals (x) and then the ref to echoes of you (although it sounds like the slightest pitch lower than in echoes of you?) and then the whole bit with ‘don’t love the bottle’ i swear on my life it sounds like it comes from somewhere? same with the background melody? but i have no idea where, it just sounds like a reference. and then we have the background little melody (x) after he says ‘a hidden melody’ so it’s like reinforced that it’s a reference but idk where from rip lmao. edit: ty to the lovely anon who mentioned it’s from masterpiece theater!!!!! and once again a++++ use of a theremin in the background for max spooky vibes. also ‘evermore’ is totally a reference to ever after (x) along with the little lift after that (i assume) and then the whole acapella bit calls back to eleonora and the ‘now’ bit to something (x) plus the ‘hear me now’ from something wow i’m great at this game lmao��as well as the ‘don’t you hear me’ part. ‘we could be together here / forever we’re together bound in madness’ i think again a lover dearest and then ofc we have the vocal runs from something (x) and then the strong background violin from another thing (yeah yeah i know they’re all references i just don’t know what from) and then he says ‘just hush eleonora’ which, as previously mentioned, is a very intriguing development from ‘don’t hush’ like this,,,,,,acceptance of the madness? and then ofc he says ‘eleonoria’ in ref to astoria. edit: also the whole ending is so so similar to the ending of ever after