#the fucking cancelling noise things with the SH

[angrycloudloud]

Thanks Tumblr for KICK ME back into the shadow of Sherlock Holmes!!!

I just got far enough from BBC Sherlock... WHY YOU PUNCH ME IN THE FACE WITH A PODCAST!?!?!

With a spanish Miss Hudson talking shit about men in Spanish to a dog?!

Autistic Sherlock seeking hugs when overstimulated?!

John with an obsession with his podcast because PTSD makes him feel a bit lost and he needs to feel like he IS doing something good?!

John loving his fans but using the case of the goose as an excuse to not go to a trip with his mates?!?! and Sherlock being pure gremblin energy when the cases are close?!?!?!

I LOVE them but FUCK OFF Tumblr i was busy i didn't need to get back into my "John and Sherlock need a hug" era!!!

[fcthots]

Okay but I like to think that Jason's helmet has like noise and brightness controls so he can focus when things get bad.

If you ever have a sensory overload day when he's near, and everything is just too bright, too loud, too much, he'll gently plunk his helmet on your head, turned down to block out almost everything but still leave you aware enough of your surroundings to know he's there.

The quiet helps, your eyes don't hurt as much. And you feel safe knowing he's protecting you.

❄️

ANON THIS IS FUCKING EVERYTHING

this may be a little too self-indulgent but, fuck it, I needed this

It started when you fell asleep last night, not meaning to, so you had to take a shower in the morning. Then you had to wear the pair of stiff jeans because you had fallen asleep before you washed clothes. Then the seams of your shirt became incredibly bothersome and ever-present. All of this is to say: you were destined for failure today.

The Wayne family had agreed on a public outing to go eat and keep up appearances. Afterwards, everyone would head back to the manor to either get ready for patrol or just hang out. The entire family was invited and so were the significant others, hence you. It's not something you could cancel and Jason was so happy to ask you to go. You were determined to tough it out. For him.

You sat down at the table and your chair was uneven and wobbly. Ok. Ignore it. Move on. The lights were almost painfully bright. You tried not to think about it. The music was on loop but there was a small static gap when it looped and the song itself wasn't long, so the static was every minute. Ignore it. You were seated with your back to the door so you couldn't see when or where noises were coming from. Ignore it. There was a baby crying somewhere around the back of the restaurant. Ignor-

Someone taps you and your shoulders raise. Jason retreats his hand back immediately.

"Are you ok?" You can see the worry and calculation in his eyes.

"I'm okay." Your words sound grating to your own ears.

He doesn’t look like he buys it. "Do you want me to order for you?"

You nod your head and he has you point to what you want on the menu.

You hold polite small talk with the entire family and try to avoid touching the napkin that's texture felt like sandpaper. You can do this.

You ignore the shuttering of paparazzi photos from the window and the constant buzz of screaming from outside.

Deep breath in. Deep breath out. You can do this.

The waiter comes back and hands out the food. Yours is very clearly burnt.

But Bruce is paying for the food and it would be rude not to eat it, right? Yeah that's something that your mother told you.

You put it in your mouth and do your best not to gag at the texture. Jason narrows his eyes at you. Fuck, he's onto you. You smile and put your all into not gagging until he turns back to look at Dick, who is telling a story.

Nailed it.

Eventually. Finally. You get to leave the restaurant.

But it's already too late for you. You can hear cars wizzing by, horns, tires screeching, engines revving, people yelling, and all other sounds of Gotham traffic. You're thankful Jason drove his car today and not his motorcycle ir you think you would have died. Steph and Duke are engrossed in their own conversation in the backseat after they refused to ride back with Bruce after he disagreed with their opinions in some fight you didn’t get the full picture of. Jason eyes you warily, but doesn’t say a word.

It's barely 5 minutes before you're at the manor. You're sitting on the couch, back straight and legs together. Alfred likes the living room to be bright, so all the lights are on. Great for Alfred. Terrible for you. You swear there must be 50 people in this fucking family because you can hear each and every one of their voices.

The sounds are grating, the lights are too bright, Cass and Tim are tossing their gear at each other over the couch and over you head, the dogs are barking, someone is yelling, Dick squeezes your shoulder as he walks past (with good intentions), you can't fucking think-

Jason's helmet is slipped over your head. He's done it before, just not often, so you forgot it even had the function.

Everything is made dark. The noise, instead of sounding like its coming rom inside your skull, sounds low and distant. Cass catches her last piece of armor from Tim and moves presumably to go down to the cave.

It's like a sensory deprivation tank and you think you might just cry of relief.

You see Jason crouch in front of you. His voice, though quieter than it usually would be, is still clear.

"Better?"

You wordlessly nod your head. In doing so, you notice that everyone else is gone. When did that happen?

"Why didn’t you tell me?" You start getting nervous. You just knew how excited he was and didn’t want to ruin it for him. And you know he still would have wanted you to tell him, but you felt terrible. You anxiously raise your shoulders into a nervous shrug.

He sighs. "I shouldn't have asked. Questions only make it worse, huh?"

You nervously nod your head. He laughs.

"'M sorry, baby."

You shake your head no before he can continue that train of thought.

"You wanna go put on one of my big comfy shirts and we can put you in my bed?"

You nod again. That sounds like fucking heaven.

He holds out his hand and you take it.

[mvshortcut]

#Show Curtain wildly misinterpreting the relationship between the adults while fleeing the island in his $10mil helicopter < prev im weeping#next time they find each other nicholas being like HOLD UP. HOLD UP TIME OUT. TIME OUT#nathaniel i need to know. i NEED--last time you said. it's. it's been HAUNTING me you#you called [gestures incoherently] my DREADFUL LITTLE POLYCULE???#(yes? did you think i wouldn't hold disdain for your ridiculous little fourway?)#nicholas starts making a painful sounding little wheezing noise#(it's not because of the polyamory for the record. it's that you all have terrible taste and also you're my brother#and therefore should never date. also bc youve weaponized your polycule against me)#NATHANIEL.....WHY DO YOU THINK WE'RE A POLYCULE I'M WEEPING....#(ARE YOU NOT??) NO??!??!?!?!? (WHAT THE FUCK)#NATHANIEL WHY DID YOU HTINK WE WERE AF UCKIGN FOURWAY. WHAT IS HAPPENING#(YOU LIVE TOGETHER! YOU HUG SO FUCKING MUCH! THOSE WOMEN HAVE SO MUCH SEXUAL TENSION!)#*in tears* THEY'RE ADOPTED SISTERS NATHANIEL.#(they're WHAT!!!!!!) im going to fucking cry. this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me#[number two: what including the emergency? the kidnappings? the childhood trauma?] this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.#(YOU'RE NOT EVEN KISSING MY STUPIDLY BIG FORMER CHEMIST?) your WH--you mean MILLIGAN?!??!#(that's definitely not his name. what the fuck i was so convinced you were married.)#😳😳😳 wh. why would you think that.#(......................WAIT) shut up SHUT UP SHUT UP SH#(WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT NICKY DO YOU HAVE A CRUUUUSH!)#SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHU#(HAHAHA!! FUCK THIS IS GREAT! BRAINSWEEPING MYSELF OF POLYCULE KNOWLEDGE CANCELLED)#brainsw--what?? wait no i DON'T HAVE A CRUSH SHUT UP (HAHAHAHA)#HE. IS ON. THE LINE. NATHANIEL. HE! CAN! HEAR YOU! (.....)#..... (.....) ..... (well. chemist. are you going to ask him out or not.)#[...] (...) [.........mr. benedict‚] (HE CALLS YOU MR. ?!?!?!??!) SHUT UP IM GOING TO KILL YOUUUUU#(even if i get you a date????) <um. sir.> (What Is It.)#<im sorry to interrupt but a small child seems to have destroyed The Evil Machine(TM) with a hammer?> (SHIT)

@bi-demon-ium get prev tagg'd idiot

you and your dreadful little polycule haven't seen the last of me

[hikeyzz]

meltdown ranting below the cut, tw for SH & SI (i am safe, just letting out thoughts)

woke up & everything was overstimulating. i was soaked in sweat bc meds give me night sweats so i had to shower but the idea of being naked made me want to plunge a dagger into my heart. but being sweaty and sticky would be worse. had to vacuum and take out the trash and something made my hands sticky in a way the soap wouldn't wash off which made me want to take a kitchen knife and chop my fingers off like baby carrots. and there's construction going on that's so loud it sounds like it's happening inside my building which is making my skin crawl and itch and makes me want to skin myself. and then my stomach hurts from overindulging all weekend but i'm so hungry but if i eat it'll only make the pain and discomfort worse. and every single joint in my body hurts so moving whatsoever feels like i'm pulling nails out of my bones. and then i'm crying bc it's all too much and i'm trying trying trying trying not to hurt myself but it's so so so so hard. SH is a really bad reallyyy old way i used to ground myself and deal with being overstimulated and upset like this. the crying just makes my stomach muscles tense which makes the pain worse which makes the crying worse. everything is bad and idk how to handle any of it, there's nothing to do??? literally even my bose noise cancelling headphones aren't enough to tune out all of the noises. i work from home and have maintenance coming today so i literally cannot leave or go anywhere quieter. no amount of soothing items will help me and i have work to do so i can't just try and distract myself with games or comfort shows. i just wanna fcking rage and thrash and beat my fists into something until i'm just torn flesh and ripped muscles and broken bones. it literally seems like the Only thing that will make me feel better even though i know it's Insane. why is my brain like thissssssssss god fuck me. literally been crying for 20min and can't stop and i have a work meeting in 40min fuck me fuck me fuck me. like the worst part about it is that i am FINE i know i am safe and i know who to reach out to if i feel unsafe and i know it's just going to be an uncomfortable day but i will be FINE. the level of discomfort is just purely, deeply uncomfortable and that's what is soo hard to cope with. there's no way to make it more comfortable, i just have to get through it, and it's so fuckingggg uncomfortable. viscerally, tangibly uncomfortable.