#the first thing tho could leave you in two v diff places. one says it bc they like the sentimental sensibilities and aesthetics

[cacaitos]

but yk it was cute when shonen writers said they wanted to incorporate shoujo aspects in their stories and shoujo girlies did literally whatever genre bc they thought it was cool or pretty and they were nerds.

[brvdleysaved]

ok first off b4 i say anythin else dnt...... judge bradley’s blog rn i dnt get my laptop bk until wednesday so i am? stranded in a photoshopless land. it’s very tragic. anyway. and scene! je suis... nai oh me..... bk again w probably my fav muse of all time so let us! leap right in! p.s. her pinterest is here

CIS FEMALE — ever hear people say BRADLEY MILLIGAN looks a lot like MARGARET QUALLEY? I think SHE is about 24, so it doesn’t really work. The PSYCHOLOGY major is a SENIOR that is from QUEENS, NY. They can be +ADVENTUROUS, but they can also be -ABRASIVE. I think BRADLEY might be SHEEP. They are living in OFF CAMPUS BUT AFFILIATED WITH BALTA. ( nai. 22. gmt. she/her. )

the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for

once drank a bottle of spiced rum, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old man’s front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried

barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%

if she was a coffee she’d be black with five grains of sugar that you couldn’t taste until the last sip

father runs a gang n strip club in queens called ‘no angels’ tht fronts an affluent drug trade, primarily coke. his name is tony milligan n his gang is p infamous around there fr being jst like…. completely cutthroat n awful. they were nicknamed ‘tony’s rottweilers’ by locals bc he bsically has all of these trained dogs on leash at his command n they’re still a growing organisation tday

he’s pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs like….. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse

in terms of more family bkground info her mum’s name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst like…. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially “guess she didn’t love us enough to stay”. as bradley’s got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, it’s become pretty clear there was far more to the story. they had a horrible marriage n tony ws quite violent at the best of times, which didn’t help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just… not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else on top of tht, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much… would look after her a lot n they’d both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole mess. anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradley’s dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just… got rid. bradley’s kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didn’t jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt she’s too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him

when her mum went all of her dad’s cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jst…. a steep downhill decline frm tht point onwards

she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they weren’t healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like it’s the only way to remind her she’s alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n sometimes gets other ppl in trouble too bc she’s so insatiably reckless

high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin

she hd….2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging she’s been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly does…. not kno how to properly emotion

honestly. im probably missing a million things bc i kind of feel like a microwaved shrimp as i write this bt. basically her life is jst the worst a true… abomination! bc im evil like tht sometimes

loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u and u murder a man in cold blood she’ll brawl anyone that says ur guilty

honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes she’ll jst be having a bad day n she’ll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. a minefield!

has the worst luck in romance…. ever. the majority of her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she kind of has the ‘romance is dead n love is a lie’ mentality

speakin of which i feel like she’s bi bt wldnt have dated a girl or anythin. like guys r probably…. her preference just bc historically theyv treated her worse n she hs a very self destructive personality like that. sexy!

dresses like courtney love, 2014 sky ferreira and a character from this is england had a baby. mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hd kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently she’s allergic to combs and generally looking presentable… relatable content

personality wise she’s v sarcastic. sometimes blunt. kind of has a habit of…. assessing a person n she’s quite perceptive bc she’s been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dad’s expression fr the slightest emotion change. she’s quite confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever. sort of independent too like she hs a bunch of friends bt she doesn’t care abt going out places alone if she’s in a certain mood n jst wants…… to get into chaos. she’s probably kind of known around campus/town bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy

likes: fishnets, stealing cars, water guns and whiskey

dislikes: amy schumer, honesty, yellow tulips and going home

in terms of Plots

hm. mayb someone tht knows her frm home/queens??? like tht frequents no angels (her dad’s strip club) or picks up frm there or smthn

i feel like she probably deals coke bt its like. Select Dealing. like she doesn’t need....2 do it fr income or anythin she jst. gets bored n is like cool may as well mke some money n possibly get robbed ig! anythin fr the thrill! 

anyone..... shes brawled in the past like. she’s literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someone’s face fr no reason bc she’s bored. she’s probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think tht’s a sexy prospect!

fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship wtever.... ur muse is like like bradley is. a handful)

mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like there’s probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily Sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n kicked the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it

ppl she....... Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination

on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesn’t kno hw to compute it

um. honestly the world’s our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!

[mifhortunach]

some Unfortunate vague vambling into the void wrt tpf

The book is a grail quest, about ppl - either knowingly or unknowingly - on grail quests, and (with/presuming the small amount that can Ever be discerned about SL) written during/around a time when a grail quest was essentially occurring/could-would be a comfort narrative. Its a surprise (to me at least) that its, as Hopeful(?) as it is*. growth occurs! people move on & move past traumas/big Events(tm)! 

I had wanted to compare it to ‘Inside Llewyn Davis’ for some reason**, but its honestly not especially similar. If one was to take ILD as a starting point, as people/LD trapped in a cycle by the v nature of Who They Are, TPF kinda jumps from that point, or some a point of hitting a level of Rock Bottom and Acting/. For some of the characters its been a more gradual shift into decisive action, (Tracy, ARY Lewis), while w others its a hitting breaking-point/epiphanous kinda thing (Bob, Sid & Danny) - action is Spurred, etc. 

A reading could be taken then, as Action as Redemptive Force, mayhaps***. in certain cases. maybe. Sid & Danny, would probs be the easiest players to be reading this theme from, “fucking up”**** & then immediately deciding ‘yk what! lets find this fckd up old musician dude u/i really loved, and ask him to restart his 60s-70s band but w us in it this time’. SO! then they go from essentially wasting away, getting high & rehashing old routines & watching/critiquing awful (beastiality) pornos, to going on their drug-smuggling funded ‘grail quest’, to meeting & reteaching the dude guitar, to Genuinely /Finding/ the grail - before (thru an act of giving up on Expectations / releasing Bitterness) - giving it up. the previous wallowing / lacking of Authenticity is Absolved though all tht, as is a long standing weirdness between them regarding giving up on what could've been their Original /Actually Lucrative/ band*****. ARY Lewis thru action comes to terms / peace w himself even tho he Doesn't find his grail, Tracy finds a kinda “peace” thru a ‘mortifying ordeal of being known’ thing, etc etc. The man (SG Lee) loves his Things Bigger Than The Self stuff i guess.

As a theme this can maybe Also be seen in reverse/inversion, w Abby (p fckn minor character), not rly being Unredeemed or anything, mostly bc she starts off as one of the ppl Least in the gutter. but from the like, glances/vignettes of her once she leaves the main story ( “[god] has a hack screenwriter’s sense of drama” ), shes now set a drift in a way tht she kinda wasn't before, and as it goes on loses diff aspects of control/certainties in her own life. i don't think shes mabs treated as sympathetically as she maybe ought to be? could the loss of these things be read into as a weird punishment for /NOT/ going on or supporting ppl going on grail quests******** ? idk ! or idk, the ending w PR running off bc he's finally found that cigerette end, and her then missing the Avril Lavigne’s hit early 00s song ‘sk8r boy’ reminiscent bit w S&D ringing her up to send her audio of the 1st of the New round tabyls’ gigs, might be read as her still being Stuck/. everyone else has (to one degree or another) improved their position since the start of the book, except her, as the only thing she now no longer has is a deadweight boyfriend and his kinda grody bffl, otherwise everything is The Same.  

Not surprised tht he (i think?) doesn't think its necessarily aged well? or. that it is no longer Quite as Relevant bc of the internet & stuff - idrk if thats Properly True******* - both bc that kinda thing can Just About still happen, but also bc if there wasn't a p minor mention of 1997 being in the past, you'd probs assume it was set earlier. ditto some of the concerns wrt oh, You Know, fckn, Exoticism/native american/shaman stuff - which i don't think is bad/ignorant/racist! but its always difficult to tell, and everything (but which i legit mean Everything/ in Gen, in The World) could use more Nuance.  

I had smth else i wanted to say, but I've forgotten what it is tbqh - & ofc, this has mostly been an exercise in Thought ReHashment(tm). It might've been that the ending seems Terribly/ Tidy. like, i don't think there could BE another ending? but its very Neat: the Bad are punished, some leads are paired off in a (presumably) cishet coupling, bad feelings are trowelled up & buried, the bois remake a hot, niche & authentic band, Luther Peyote can play the guitar again: Picture Perfect. Its an ending that fits, its an ending tht (i think? idk Anything abt this kinda thing) puts emphasis on the quest-y stuff, and the poss redemption angle; but it feels like a far remove from the kinda squalor of the first while - which is probs another point in its favour, rip.*********   

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*not to say/imply (ofc! ofc!!) tht this might be seen as somewhat ooc of stewart lee, but it still kinda caught me off-guard. poss bc its a Very Tidy wrap-up, and it happens quite fast, i felt. but tht might just be the time that in it. 

**this reason may have been qs of #authenticity! or maybe just bc things/backgrounds/the world are kinda gross

*** “almost. action as redemptive force (as a form off faith/belief? faith/belief as redemptive force - if not in a god, in the World or Others?)” -> thats from the Even Worse! orig version of this, lmao. but also Action as a way of Escape/breaking a cycle

****for want of a better descrip

***** the orig uhm, idfk, them lemon boys, could probs be read into - if one Wanted to read too much into these things mabs - as some kinda weird parallel to the original On The Hour stuff(?) w AL vs L&H, & how they Didn't get royalties/whatever was up there. you'd never be able to be either Accurate or Sure about that though, even w certain traits of S&D being p clearly lifted from L&H, or old SL routines - theyre not Explicit or Perfect cyphers/inserts yk?******

****** following on! (if i may) some of the. not /Tension/,, but smth similar, w S&D often feels. not truly emotionally resolved? or just like, Unclear/ at times. the whole novel speeds up a fair bit once more than 2 (two) characters have to be properly juggled in a scene. [which is to say tht in some real Old L&H interviews, (usually in the ones where L isn't present, lmao) RH says tht SL gets ‘embarrassed’ by having to directly explore how ppl might feel about each other/relationships yk? can't say thats necessarily true! but it Is smth i couldn't help thinking about. but emotional exploration & openness is also the realm of fanfic, so maybe I'm asking too much, fgdksh] 

*******im trying not to use the word ‘necessarily’ here again

******** for the small sum of €5 a month, you too could support a pilgrim on a grail quest

*********tho tbf, could also v much be influenced by the whole thing being written over the better part of a decade, place/s while writing & stuff yk? idfk

[yn6k]

moonriase replied to your post “just throwing this out there because im curious about how others have...”

The way that I interpret the whole trilogy is that it all happens in high school seeing as how I believe that the timeline goes from WCID to WYLS (besides a couple of scenes) to I Loved You. Basic storyline is that Sungjin falls in love with Jae's friend, but she has feelings for someone else (that being Young K). Wonpil wants to be supportive but he can't help but let his feelings get in the way of things. Seeing that the girl wants to be with Young K and seeing them hang out with each other, Sungjin decides to confess to her. (Surprisingly enough, Sungjin doesn't tell her that she should be with him, instead telling her that it's okay that she likes another person and that he just wanted to get it out.) Wonpil gets upset and sees the bunny keychain that he dropped, indicating that he thinks that Sungjin has dropped their whole friendship for one girl. On Young K's side, he's basically the loner of the school, and not in the good way. While the girl does like and wants to help him (which she does during the whole convenience store scene), he doesn't really want to get involved with her for unknown reasons. (relationship problems/bad past?) This leads to the girl getting bad feelings for Young K, leading to an ambiguous situation between the two of them. However! There is an upside in the form of Dowoon, the lonely (probably) rich popular dude. With Young K deciding to help him out by punching out a bully of sorts, this leads to a friendship of sorts seeing as how Dowoon gives Young K an egg for his wounds. (Very adorable if I say so myself.) Meanwhile in Jae's world, he gets himself all caught up with this waitress from a local cafe, crushing on her hard and fast, leading to his disinvolvment with the whole love triangle (gah this has gotten long) To wrap it all up, I think the ending scene of the WYLS M/V takes place a few days after the whole confession things with Sungjin and the girl. Deciding that his friendship with Sungjin is more important than anything (even with his own feelings of regret and crush), he gives back the bunny keychain that Sungjin dropped. I think that you can look at the bunny keychain as a symbol of the friendship of Sungjin and Wonpil. For whatever reason Wonpil may have decided to give Sungjin the keychain as a joke gift of sorts long ago. Despite the whole joke gift thing, he views as something sentimental as the years go by as he slowly realizes that he's gaining more romantic feelings for Sungjin. Thus his longing and confused expressions towards the keychain during the ILY and WYLS MVs. There's no way that someone would get so wrapped up in a keychain unless it was just that important to them. This was really confusing and pretty much spit out from my head, but this was the best thing that I could think of for the whole trilogy. Part of me wants it to become a whole movie now since we have so many interpretations and questions towards the whole thing that need to be answered lol

oh thank you for your really thought out answer! i’ll put my response under the cut :)

i do agree about the chronology of the mvs being WCID WYLS and then I Loved You, especially since its basically confirmed in the mv itself in the beginning of WYLS. but idk, i  can see how could all be high school but part of me feels like the non high school scenes are like after high school scenes? maybe its just the fact that the boys dont really resemble high schoolers imo? like whenever theyre not in the school uniform its just weird to see them as smol high schoolers hahah but also certain things like how in i loved you, that closeup of youngks hand?? when i first saw that i thought it was a marriage or promise or engagement ring or smth of the sorts on his hand and thats why we got a closeup of it? which is one of the reasons i thought that it took place way after but alksdj maybe that detail meant absolutely nothing lmaoo haha esp since the other girl doesnt have a ring (but does youngk even like the girl hmmm). it also doesnt help that they have diff hair alksdjf but im probably overthinking that  i honestly dont think sungjin confessing the way he did is too much of a strange thought! it kinda also goes along with the whole vibe of the lyrics for ‘when you love someone’. like this whole feeling of wanting the one you love to be happy and sungjin assumes that her happiness lies with her feelings for youngk or something like that. and hmm i dont think i ever saw necessarily the girl getting bad feelings for youngk unless its that one mopping scene? to me that felt more like frustration or smth along those lines instead of like bad feelings also when youngk bumped into her it felt more like intrigue than anger haha but they do have an ambiguous relationship. nvr felt that same pull from youngk towards the girl as we get from sungjin to the girl. if anything youngk seems to be fascinated at her helping her out? someone he barely knows and someone who hes maybe not treated as fairly in the past (ie that mopping scene)? he seems to take her chivalry as inspiration and its probably the reason he stands up for dowoon in the arcade? how a selfless action can affect a relationship i think is also a common theme throughout ALL of them (aklsdjf maybe sans jae lkajlsk i feel like his story was almost an afterthought hes rather disconnected its almost weird). wonpil hiding his love, sungjin confessing but with no expectations, the girl helping youngk and youngk helping dowoon, all acts of selflessness.  the keychain tho! i think its all very interesting that basically everyone has interpreted it to be wonpils gift to sungjin or maybe something that belongs to the girl that was dropped on their way out but not something that wonpil could have dropped on the way in! but i also think that its more of a correct conclusion given where that shot of the keychain was placed in the mv and that coupled with the fact of how sungjin reacts to wonpil giving the key chain to him its like hes giving something to him that he is familiar with there is comfort and familiarity in the way he holds it. honestly i initially thought the keychain belonged to the girl, wonpil found it, contemplated what he should do with it on the monkey bars, and then finally gave it sungjin (but maybe im watching too many dramas haha) in terms of symbolism tho, sungjin folding his hand onto the keychain always to me represented him getting over the girl almost as if he doesnt need the keychain anymore? it was such a strange action to me for him to do that if it was a gift from wonpil that wonpils returning back to him. on the bus, wonpil looks absolutely torn when sungjin leaves but he looks really surprised at the fact that the keychain is on the ground like i dont think hes necessarily sad the keychain was dropped just a little ?? about it. also the whole theme of the song ‘when you love someone’ like hed rather be hurting himself so long as sungjin is happy with the girl (bc wonpil at that point might not have known how the confession had ended!! so it could have gone well or maybe he didnt confess wonpil might not have known anything! so) although i can definitely get behind the theory that the keychain belongs to wonpil and is precious to him as a symbol of a) his love for sungjin and b) sungjins friendship for him. im not sure if it would be a ‘joke present’ haha but. if you consider that meeting at the end of wyls to be the very first time that wonpil gave sungjin the keychain, i think that interaction takes on a diff meaning too.