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2025 UCI WorldTour Debutant Ball
Huub Artz (Intermarché - Wanty) | Niklas Behrens (Team Visma Lease a Bike) | Léo Bisiaux (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team)
Matthew Brennan (Team Visma Lease a Bike) | Pablo Castrillo (Movistar Team) | Oscar Chamberlain (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team)
Tibor Del Grosso (Alpecin - Deceuninck) | Robert Donaldson (Team Jayco AlUla) | Gal Glivar (Alpecin - Deceuninck)
Florian Kajamini (XDS Astana Team) | Jelte Krijnsen (Team Jayco AlUla) | JĂžrgen Nordhagen (Team Visma Lease a Bike)
Rasmus SĂžjberg Pedersen (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team) | Giulio Pellizzari (Red Bull - BORA - Hansgrohe) | Diego Pescador (Movistar Team)
Brieuc Rolland (Groupama - FDJ) | Paul Seixas (Decathlon AG2R La Mondiale Team) | Embret Svestad-BÄrdseng (Arkéa - B&B Hotels)
Tim Torn Teutenberg (Lidl - Trek) | Pablo Torres (UAE Team Emirates - XRG) | Darren van Bekkum (XDS Astana Team)
Max van der Meulen (Bahrain - Victorious) | Vlad van Mechelen (Bahrain - Victorious) | Albert Withen Philipsen (Lidl - Trek)
#important to note that this is not all of the worldtour debutants. many got left out bc of the tumblr post photo limit :(#graat. debruyne. huising. verstrynge. martinez. isidore. izquierdo. erzen. raccagni noviero. walker. toneatti. dehairs.#plus older riders getting their first shot at the worldtour: braz afonso. cepeda. donnenwirth. double. langellotti.#and it's also just wt but the proseries has them too - dalby. rondel. orins. de schuyteneer. wenzel. blackmore. weiss. pedersen. mouris.#is this worldtour debutants specifically instead of neopros just so i could include pellizzari and castrillo? you can't prove anything#bahrain alone has 7 neopros (including guys who were trainees part of last year) and all of arkea's transfers (5) are from their devo team#visma and alpecin each have five (4 from their respective devo teams) and decathlon has six (5 from their devo and u19 teams)#hate that seixas and philipsen are here. hate it. stop sending juniors straight to the world tour!#i guess full disclosure both van mechelen and van der meulen were trainees with bahrain last fall so not teeeechnically first time wt rider#but first full year so i'm counting them anyway#and teutenberg with lidl trek in the fall of 2023 too bc they didn't have a devo team then. but it's my post so i'm counting him too#yes glivar's is photoshopped. yes both he and del grosso are in the old alpecin jersey. i don't want to talk about it.#i asked for opinions and then decided to split the difference and use the old jersey but photoshop glivar into it with uh. mixed results#if that team would just release headshots in time we wouldn't be in this situation now would we. check and mate.#my apologies and thanks to jente michels whose torso and jersey i borrowed for that purpose
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park sunghoon â THE PUSSY EATING COMPETITION!
P. munch!sunghoon x fem!reader (17+) | W. pussy eating (obv), squirting, oral, unprotected sex, cursing, multiple orgasms, munches jakehoon + munchwon , freakseung, subspace, biting, other shit i forgot | WC. 5.7k !! | A,N. this oneâs for my babychels ! @ak4e7a ⥠⊠would anyone like a drabble about heeseungâs experience?
in which⊠jake convinces sunghoon to join a pussy eating competition with a bet !
âyou want me to join the what?â sunghoon questioned, his thick eyebrows furrowed, plump lips parted in confusion.
âthe pussy eating competition, bro!â jake rolled his eyes as he repeated his sentence for the third time already. reaching over to flick a concerned looking sunghoonâs forehead.
âand why the fuck would i join whatever the fuck that is?â he smacked jakeâs hand away when the stinging pain rushed in his head. cursing jake more under his breath. âwhy the fuck not?â he huffed, âheeseung was at it yesterday, he won his stupid bet with jay.â
âthey had a bet?â sunghoon closed his laptop, deciding that whatever notes he was about to take from their lecture can wait until he figures out if jake is being serious or not. âyeah, dude. jay bet heeseung fifty bucks if he could make his girl squirt three times in ten minutes.â jake chuckled at the memory.
âand heeseung won?â sunghoon questioned, eyebrows raised in anticipation this time as jakeâs smile only widened. âwon the bet in eight minutes and twenty six seconds.â he laughed, sunghoon wasnât surprised or shocked in any way. he was surprised at jayâs idiocy of choosing âten minutesâ when all heeseung has been doing since he got laid was boast about his squirting ability in their group chat.
and heeseung called himself âthe pussy squirting fairyâ way too often for their liking.
and besides who even came up with this stupid competition in the first place? who even agreed to any of this? why did heeseung and jay join? and why the fuck was jake asking him to join too?
âlisten bro itâs nothing seriousâ you go to the pussy eating competition center and ask to join in for a competition with someoneâ in that case that will be me, and then weâll get to eat some fire pussy out for free so itâs really just a huge win situation.â jake rambled, balancing between his two feet as he continued to convince sunghoon to join in with him.
âwe could even place a bet like hyung and jay did! ten minutes for three squirts is a good deal you know? itâs just that heeseung is a fucking freaââ jakeâs voice slowly got tuned out of sunghoonâs ear as he thought about this more.
considering all the possibilities of this competition that still sounded pretty unreal to him, was this a stupid idea? yes. should he trust jake? no. did he not believe this idea because it sounded like a dream? yes. was the last time that sunghoon got offered pussy around three months ago? unfortunately, yes. did he currently feel like a loser teenage boy with his pants tightening at the thought of eating pussy? ⊠also yes.
but was this an opportunity for him to live up to his âcertified munch hoonâ title though? yes. and was sunghoon going to take it? fuck yes.
âyou could also tap out at any minuteââ âwhere can i apply?â sunghoon interrupted jakeâs irritating speech. âitâs not thaâ huh?â his eyes widened in surprised, âyou want to join?â he tilted his head to the side in a puppy like manner, a twinkle of excitement in his gaze. âyou said you were going to join too, right?â sunghoon eyed him warily, a wave of relief washing down on him when jake nodded with enthusiasm.
âyou also said we could place bets, yeah?â he questioned, âyes! like the ten minutes for three squirts hyung madââ âmake it five.â jake gaped at him, blinking his eyes in surprise. âwhat?â
his hand came up to rest on sunghoonâs shoulder as he tried to process his words, âfive minutes?â his gaze became conflicted as the younger nodded, âfive minutes for three?â jake tried to understand him more, really trying his best.
âfive minutes for five squirts.â jake gulped.
âfor a hundered bucks.â
well fuck.
sunghoon was on a mission.
wearing a white, sleeveless shirt along with jeans to make his movements easier, the shirt given to him by jake in order to âtell apart who got the more squirtsâ according to the wetness that coated the white fabric.
he was now standing in line with jake, the shorter one walking with a slight bounce in his step from his excitement. âare you ready?â he whispered, eyes travelling all over the place where the competition was held.
countless other contestants from both genders aligned in the waiting line, each pair waiting their own turn, some going neck to neck with other friends and placing bets while others threw snarky glances at each other.
truly a competition for some.
âdo we atleast get to pick who we get to eat out?â the taller sighed, his ebony locks sticking further to his temples due to his sweat, it was either unreasonably hot or sunghoon was weirdly nervous.
probably unreasonably hot. it was mid july after all.
âi donât think so.. i didnât ask hyungââ âobviously no.â a foreign voice cut off jake, making the two turn around to greet another guy. that was also wearing a white shirt.
âitâs a competition. you donât get to choose who you get to eat out.â he rolled his eyes as if it was the most obvious thing. god what an obnoxious attitude.
sunghoon rolled his eyes, âpipe the fuck down, jungwon. we get it you practically live here.â jake snapped back. running his fingers through his hair while he turned around. he looked unusually restless for sunghoonâs liking.
i mean, there was a whole hundred dollar bill on the table for this bet.
âpark sunghoon and sim jaeyun! youâre up next.â the same guy who jotted down their names in his board, who sunghoon assumed was the managerâ called both of their names up to the front.
where sunghoon wasnât prepared to have his breath knocked out of his lungs so quickly.
as he and jake stepped up the smal staircase leading to the mini stage where two chairs were situated, there sat two girls. very very pretty girls. dreamlike pretty girls. one hundred percent sunghoonâs type. really really pretty girâ
âstop fucking staring like a creep.â jake elbowed him when he realised that sunghoon was basically two seconds away from drooling at the sight of you. sunghoon covered his awkward staring with a strained cough. lowering his head and unknowingly bringing attention to his reddening ears.
which at the sight of, you chuckled.
and sunghoonâs knees almost buckled.
âtake your respective positions and be prepared.â the manager, who sunghoon caught a brief glance at the name tag ofâ mark. ordered them around. sunghoon stepped closer towards you. who stared at him with the most alluring glint in your eyes. you were wearing a pink top with pink lace panties that were covered by a feather light towel. donât ask how he noticed them.
âhi.. iâm sunghoon.â he spoke awkwardly, extending out his hand towards yours. finding his demeanour adorable, you quickly shook his hand. a smile gracing your features as you introduced yourself to him.
three months shouldnât be that much time since he got with a girl but it felt like it was centuries ago. especially with the way his heart began to thump thump thump! between his ribs weirdly.
he spared a swift glance to jake, just in time to catch him throwing a flirtatious wink towards his own girl. goodness that dude was a freak himself.
âspare the introductions and get into your positions, what was your bet again?â mark quickly muttered, glancing at the paper in his hand and back at jake and sunghoon. pushing his glasses above the bridge of his nose.
âa hundred bucks.â jake spoke, puffing out his chest in anxiety, âand thatâs for ten minutes right? three orgasms in ten?â mark nodded as he wrote down the timing on his paper.
âno actually⊠itâs five minutes.â jake bit his lips, sunghoon shook his head in slight disbelief and embarrassment at the current situation they were in right now. totally ignoring the fact that there were two drop dead gorgeous girls whispering and giggling right behind them both.
âfive minutes for three?â mark questioned, his eyebrows raising in surprise that increased when sunghoon quickly shook his head in denial, âfive minutes for five.â mark blinked.
a slight echoing line of oooâs made their way into jake and sunghoonâs reddened ears, embarrassment crawling up their backs as mark awkwardly cleared his throat and nodded to their words. quickly changing the numbers on the timer and scribbling a few other random sentences on his board.
âweâll shortly start the timer and the competition will begin.â he stepped back allowing the two to inch back towards the girls, jake spared a quick glance at mark who was now holding onto the alarm clock between his fingers before lowering down to his knees in front of the chair.
sunghoon swiftly followed suit, dropping onto his knees and lifting his head right between your legs to welcome the heavenly view. gosh you looked divine.
âfive for five, hm?â you cheekily smiled at him, a sight that made the boyâs heart throb with the sudden need to always make you smile. he nodded shyly, his slightly wavy locks ruffling in his hair in a fluffy manner at the motion. âbetter not disappoint.â you then discarded the towel to the ground.
âoh i for sure wonât.â sunghoon smirked, a wave of confidence descending on him at the sight of your soaked cunt so close to his face, he could practically taste your leaking essence from the side of your panties.
âon your marks..â the young manager called out, sunghoon skilfully pulled apart your plush thighs, placing your legs on top of his shoulders as jake did the same besides him. you quickly laid back towards the table behind you on your elbows, giving sunghoon full access to anything and everything.
âget set..â mark called out, eyes glued on the button that will start the timer while sunghoon pushed the tip of his nose against your slit, the contact making you hum in delight as his tip pressed against your throbbing clit while your essence soaked through the thin fabric and onto his skin.
he poked his tongue out just slightly, brushing against your sopping hole restricted by the lace fabric that began to slightly irritate him, and sunghoon was gone.
pineapples. cotton candy. cranberries. straight sugar. you tasted otherworldly. it was not surprising that you would taste delicious as you probably do take care of yourself to the best of your ability because of this competition, but for you to taste this dizzying? to have an essence and nectar that melted against his tastebuds like honey?
sunghoon was gone.
âgo!â and just like that, sunghoonâs brain was replaced by a horny puddle of mush inside of his skull. unaware of the fact that he pushed and teared your panties to the side, aiming to lick a long, tantalising stripe starting from your hole till he reached your clit where he applied pressure.
the action made your hand shoot towards his head, gripping a handful of his soft hair in your hands as his tongue circled and pushed against your sensitive nub, his large fingers pried your thighs apart when they began to push against him. normally, sunghoon wouldnât mind getting suffocated by plush and soft thighs like this. yet today, he couldnât lose a hundered dollar bill against jake. out of all people.
and fucking jake was going at it next to him. making all sorts of wet noises that had his girl throwing her head back in pleasure. while the timer struck twenty five seconds.
fuck, he only had thirty five seconds left for the first minute.
thatâs when sunghoon decided to let go of all of his restraints, allowing all the walls he kept to crumble right apart when he pushed your legs around his head, one hand holding your leg to keep your pressed against him as you needed the extra support while the other pushed his middle and ring finger deep inside of you.
a squeal left your mouth when sunghoon attached his plump lips around your clit. sucking and slurping so loudly, obscene noises followed by your moans and the ticking of the timer barely made their way past sunghoonâs ringing ears. he was completely out of it.
he thrusted his finger in and out. quickly in and out. too busy closing his eyes to savour your flavour on his tongue to take notice of the multiple webs of wetness that connected his knuckles and your entrance. his fingers reached so deep, they were so long and the perfect size to cause the most delicious burn in your walls as he stretched them open.
right when the timer hit forty seconds, sunghoonâs fingertip brushed against your sweet spot.
you mewled his name, back arching off of the table as he hummed in delight at the realisation, âfound it, didnât i? itâs right. here.â he accentuated every word with another thrust against the spot that had you seeing stars. you nodded mindlessly as the knot in your abdomen curled on itself the longer sunghoon abused your cunt.
âf-fuck yes! right there, baby. right there.â you encouraged him, moans increasing in volume the harsher sunghoon sucked around your clit, his fingers became even more restless after the sudden petname. baby. thatâs right, he was your baby. the only one that will please you from now on.
âyeah, pretty girl? feels good doesnât it?â sunghoon spoke against your clit, each word sending a vibration right against your spine as pleasure raked through your body in rough waves. it suddenly felt like you were the only two in the world. your surroundings melting in an instant as you gasped his name and praised him for making you feel so good. so ecstatic.
fifty seconds in, and thatâs when the coil in your abdomen suddenly snapped.
your climax washed over you out of nowhere, such an intense and speedy build up that you werenât even able to process anything till you started to shake under sunghoonâs hold. your wetness was dripping down his forearm as he fucked you through your orgasm, each thrust of his finger made your squirt land over his shirt.
first sixty seconds was a complete and easy success.
âfirst minute is done! one point for sunghoon, and one point for jaeyun.â mark called out. shit, so that fucker also managed to keep up with him then?
he still had four minutes to redeem himself. with the way he was able to easily make you squirt from the first fifty seconds he felt like he knew your body inside out. knew exactly which buttons to push and what nerve to pull to coax out another orgasm out of you. there was no way he was losing.
âminute two starting now!â markâs voice reached sunghoonâs ears in a muffled manner as he pressed your twitching legs closer to his shoulders, this time sunghoon pushed his long tongue inside of your gushing hole. a lustful glint in his eyes as he reached his slender fingers towards your clit.
rubbing slow, torturous but powerful circles on your aching nub while he licked all over your walls, slurping against your wetness that leaked down his chin and made its way down his neck, fuck he was so addicted to your flavour.
your moans became weaker as your body tried to calm down from your previous orgasm, such a mind blowing climax washing down on your body so suddenly made your head spin. and sunghoon was already overstimulating you as he worked towards another orgasm. fuck. you, yourself were done for under him.
he felt so good. so skilled as he satisfied and pleasured you in ways youâve never felt before. his strong, muscular arms keeping your legs open as he buried his face so mindlessly between them, diving into your wetness with no other care in the world as if he was born to do this.
he lived to devour pussy. truly suitable for a competition like this.
âgonna give me another one hm?â twenty nine seconds.
âthink you can handle another one, babydoll?â he taunted, barely pulling out his tongue to speak before burying it back inside of you, his fingers never halting to a stop as they began to pinch and pull at your clit. the familiar tightening in your lower stomach made your mind reel while your silence began to frustrate sunghoon.
thatâs when he landed a harsh slap against your clit. the sudden pain and pleasure making you jolt under his hold as you nearly screamed out his name. ây-yes, yes i can! please, iâll give you as many as you want!â you cried out, your broken begs rushing directly into his aching cock in the confines of his jeans. exactly what he needed to hear.
âwhat a good fucking girl, hm? such a good girl for me, arenât ya?â he mocked, hand resorting back to circling on your clit as he buried himself in your folds, his nose brushed up against his fingers while he thrusted his tongue in and out of you stimulating you in the best ways possible.
thirty seven seconds was all it took for sunghoon to make you squirt on him for the second time. in the span of a minute and a half.
he slapped against your leaking hole while you convulsed beneath him, each slap getting his shirt wetter which signalled mark to announce âminute two half way done, two points for sunghoon and one for jaeyun!â
jakeâs noise of surprised went unnoticed by sunghoon, almost half way in. he thought to himself as he lifted your limp legs off of his shoulders and balanced himself on his knees again.
he pressed your legs together, making your swollen, glistening folds puff up one each other while your nectar slipped out of your hole in heavy, clear droplets. sunghoon wanted to do nothing more than to slurp it all up.
without wasting anymore time, he pushed his mouth against your cunt, kissing up against your folds as the timer showcased fifty seconds, as cocky as this might sound but he already knew he won. especially when he inhaled your scent deeply and pushed his nose and mouth onto your entrance again. successful in making you scream his name this time.
he held your shaking legs up with one hand, grip strong and tight as he relished in your flavour running down his throat. so addicted as he ate you out like a drunk man. completely high on your pussy. he sucked and licked and kissed everywhere so noisily.
sucking up your swollen and sensitive folds into his mouth, coating every inch of your skin in his saliva that combined with your own wetness before returning to slurp around your clit. his mind was reeling. becoming a mushy piece of muscle in his head as the only thought that drove him to continue was to make you squirt again.
âminute three starting now, with two points to sunghoon and two points to jaeyun. yet another tie!â fuck, jake was catching up.
but sunghoon for some reason was starting to not mind.. call it the euphoria of getting high off of pussy or anything else. he no longer wanted to do this to beat jake and win a hundred dollars. he wanted to do this because it felt good. you felt good.
and just like that, he began to indulge himself in your cunt entirely. surrendering and making his rational side disappear as he hummed and moaned at your taste. shaking his head from side to side as he slurped you up so well. drooling your essence further down his chin as he pleasured you because it was his own pleasure.
each moan of his sent shocks around you body. your surroundings blurring as the air around you became electrified. goosebumps aligning your skin when you felt another climax building up gradually in your abdomen. the longer he spent humming around your clit and buzzing up your whole body the further you felt your consciousness slipping away from your fingertips.
guess you couldnât really handle it after all.
it was at three minutes and fifteen seconds when sunghoon made you squirt for the third time.
your hands shot to grip onto the chair that was by now shaking with your body, hot white ecstasy blinding your vision as your climax washed down on your body in violent waves one after the other. and sunghoon just kept going. noisily slurping up everything you offered. he was being so embarrassingly loud as he kept rubbing his face into your cunt, getting your wetness all over his face and jaw. overstimulating you more with each passing second while your eyes rolled to the back of your head.
âthree minutes and twenty seconds in! three points for sunghoon and two for jake!â mark announced, his voice becoming unusually strained as the sight of the two men on their knees doing their best to pleasure their girls was starting to get to him.
it was his least favourite part of his job when he started to feel a tightening in his pants.
âso good for me, doll. we only need two more, come on. you can give it to me right?â you nodded with your head spinning. a dizzying sense of pleasure raking through your veins. sunghoon settled down for gentle bites across your thighs, giving you a few moments to cool down as he looked up.
big mistake.
the sight of you had one of his hands shooting down towards his raging boner that began uncontrollably twitching between his boxers. your pretty pink tank top ridden up revealing the underside of the plush skin of your breasts, a sheen layer of sweat coating your body as you breathed in deeply to calm your heart down when it felt like it was seconds away from bursting.
your fucked out expression is what did it for him. eyes hazed and high off pleasure. drunk on the feeling of his plump lips on your swollen cunt that tightened around nothing. sunghoon was so fucked.
âso needy for me isnât she..?â he whispered only for you to hear, fascinated in the way your gaping hole winked at him. spilling out more of your sweet nectar that became sunghoonâs favourite drug in the matter of a few minutes. you grew flustered at his words, lifting your arm up t cover your eyes while sunghoon blew on your pussy teasingly.
discarding the competition and the fact that there were people around him, sunghoon quickly lifted himself up, leaning his body forward above yours as he began to hover on top of you. your breath hitched at the close proximity while sunghoon smiled adorably, showcasing you his pretty fangs that were sinking down your thighs just a few seconds ago.
âready to give me another one, little girl?â he whispered. so so close to your face that his wet lips that were covered in your essence brushed against yours with every word. you nodded shyly, slowly getting fucked into subspace as your mind began to shut down. eyes blinking slowly while sunghoon pushed his long fingers back inside of you. gosh you were so cute.
three minutes and thirty two seconds in, and you were gripping onto sunghoonâs bicep that pushed his fingers inside of you deeper.
you were mewling and whimpering his name so prettily. so perfect and delicate under him. under his control allowing him to do anything with your body and it was driving him crazy. he couldnât hold himself back when he finally pushed his lips against yours.
you moaned so endearingly under him. kissing him back so eagerly as his fingertip massaged your sweet spot making you bite gently on his lower lip. he groaned into your mouth as he fucked his fingers quicker. hitting all your spots with each thrust and making you see stars while he sucked on the tip of your tongue.
he didnât care that he could be breaking rules right now. did not give a singular flying fuck that mark could be looking around confused wondering if this was accepted. and certainly did not even mind when jake scored his third point. all he wanted and needed right now was for you to cum for him as many times as possible. he needed to feel you tightening as your euphoria made you fall apart in his hold. it was a pleasure that he got addicted to.
âyou close baby? feeling good hm?â he didnât even need you to respond to him. not when your cunt was doing all the talking by clenching and drooling down his wrist. sucking in three of his fingers in so deeply he could only imagine how incredible you would feel around his cock, but in reality he shouldnât imagine that right now. not when his dick was about to practically rip apart his boxers.
âsâclose hoon.. so so close!â you blabbered, brain completely shutting down as you couldnât tell apart your orgasm and overstimulation anymore. all you could feel and process was the unbelievable amount of pure ecstatic pleasure rushing throughout your whole body so wonderfully that it had you digging your nails into his back. your legs going numb under you as your knot tightened and tightened for the fourth time. almost done.
âcome on, babydoll. cum for me like the good girl that you are.â he whispered against your neck and that was enough for you to squirt around his fingers again. he kept fucking into you, riding out your orgasm as your throat was no longer able to produce any noises, only soft whispers of pleads reaching sunghoonâs ear as he scored his fourth point easily.
he kissed along your jawline when he stilled his fingers inside of you, âplease what, pretty girl?â he asked, already having a fleeting wild thought in his head that he discarded because he might actually lose his sanitâ âi need your cock please. please for the last one, please fuck me.â holy fuck.
âthree minutes and fifty six seconds in! four points for sunghoon and three for jaeyâ why are you taking your pants o?ââ markâs voice became unreasonably loud towards the end but sunghoon was on a mission.
five squirts is five squirts. a hundred dollar bill is a hundred dollar bill. heâs not about to lose any of this because he didnât push his cock into a pretty little hole like yours. no he was about to make his win a double win.
sunghoon pushed down both his jeans and boxers down in one go, his leaking cock springing out the tight pieces of fabric with multiple lines of precum dribbling down to his balls, thick mushroom tip thatâs a fiery red throbbing in need and desire while your swollen hole gaped at him.
yeah he was gonna lose if he didnât fuck you for sure.
âyou ready, doll?â he asked as if he hadnât spent the past few minutes stretching you out so nicely. you nodded so eagerly at his words. mouth watering at the sight of his veiny, thick cock pulsating so deliciously in front of you. he was so big. such a perfect size for stretching you out more.
he pushed the head of his cock in and god was he huge. you gasped around his lips when he gave you a few seconds to adjust before pushing his entire length in, bottoming out quicker than anticipated, but sunghoon didnât care.
he couldnât care less about the fact that he was fucking you in front of random people right now. why should he care when he knew he was going to bring you home by the end of the day and slither his way into your life after this? in fact, people should be glad because this will be the last time youâll be seen here.
because heâs planning on having you in strawberry pink lingeries between his silky satin sheets for the rest of his life.
so technically, everyone should be glad theyâre getting a show of you both right now. because itâll be the last one.
âso deep hoon.. so fuckinâ deep..â you mewled, eyes shutting in pleasure when he slightly pulled out, barely by an inch before he thrusted back in. he felt the way your warm walls pulsed around his cock needily. sucking him back in with each movement as if they were not allowing him to pull out at all. so needy and so desperate to have something, anything to plug up your slutty hole.
âfeeling good, pretty girl?â he asked, lowering his hand to press on the evident bulge that appeared on your lower stomach. the feeling made the two of you groan in pleasure, sunghoon was fleeting through cloud nine. he couldnât believe how he went on with his life for so many years without spending each passing inside your cunt. so many time wasted when he couldâve been drunk on the heaven between your legs.
âsâgood! so good, hoon.â gasping out the new petname that had his eyes rolling back, he glanced at the timer that was held by a flustered mark, palming his raging boner through his pants and noticed âfour minutes and twenty nine seconds.â yeah the game was his. he won.
he switched his position, balancing himself back on his legs as he gripped your thighs, wrapping them around his waist while he sunk his cock in deeper. relishing in the sight of you throwing your head back when he penetrated you so good. the tip of his dick kissing against your cervix harshly. and just like that, he began to pound inside of you.
your unrestrained moans tumbled past your lips at his harsh thrusts. body being lit ablaze with mind numbing pleasure that enlivened every part of you. a different, never felt before kind of thrill rushed through your being. a fervent sensation that youâve never experienced, one only brought to you by sunghoon as he continued to fuck you. determined on making you crumble completely around his cock.
and his wish was about to be granted with the way your abdomen began to tighten. exhaustion creeping up on you along with an almost scary build up of your climax. you were about to get knocked out with this one and you felt it.
âcome on, angel. give me another one. the final one, i know you can do it, doll.â he encouraged, pressing his hand on his bulge that disappeared and appeared with every one of his thrusts, his large hand applying the perfect amount of pressure to have your head spin again. seconds away from cumming on his cock for the first time. his tip pressed and massaged all of your spots perfectly. âitâs right here, isnât it? this is where youâre weak for me.â he chuckled.
you were slowly losing consciousness at this rate, body burning with euphoria that flashed through your limbs. âf-fuck iâm sâclose! hoonâ fuck!â you screamed his name as you felt your pleasure crashing down on you for the fifth time. walls tightening and clenching mercilessly making sunghoon hiss in pain while you squirted all over his abdomen.
the pressure from your orgasm made it hard for him to thrust back, but he continued. âand five points for sunghoon! at four minutes and fifty one seconds! park sunghoon is the winner of the pussy eating competition!â a new voice cheered from behind him, one that belonged to a taller manager that appeared since mark had to leave for a quick and âurgentâ bathroom break, making his best friend, johnny announce the winner.
but did the winner in question care right now? not really.
ignoring jakeâs protests of disappointment and the sounds of his girl comforting him and finding him being upset adorable, also ignoring jakeâs yells of shock and disbelief when he looked over and realised that sunghoon was currently balls deep inside of his girl. âi didnât know you could literally fuck?!â he practically screamed at johnny as his girl tried to hold him back from jumping the taller guy.
yet all of this, went unnoticed by both you and sunghoon. who was now chasing his own pleasure inside of your divine pussy that kept trying to push him out while your back arched in his hold, pushing your chest against his as your body shook with complete overstimulation. he buried himself so deep inside of you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he hugged you when he pressed his tip against your cervix entirely before shooting his load inside of you.
both of you groaned in pleasure, sunghoon whimpering your name as his climax came down on him with intense ecstasy that coursed through his body. each nerve ending of his blazing with fire while his mind melted. you felt so unreal.
he finally came down from his high, allowing the two of you to catch your breaths as he was rooted still so deep inside of you. âyou okay, doll?â he mumbled lowly only for you to hear, panting on your skin while you nodded tiredly, eyes clearly droopy and sleepy making him chuckle. finding all of your expressions so adorable.
âyou did so good for me, little girl.â he kissed your lips, savouring the taste of you on his tongue and lips before he gently pulled away. pulling his softening length out and quickly fixing his clothing before grabbing your discarded towel to help clean you up. unaware of the fact that there was a looming, pissed jaeyun behind him like his shadow.
âwhat the fuck sunghoon!?â he suddenly yelled, making the two of you jump in surprise before you tiredly looked over and sunghoon angrily turned around. âthe fuck are you yelling for?â he furrowed his eyebrows, seriously what was this dude thinking right now?
âyou cheated!â he pointed his finger, eyes wide with the accusation as sunghoon only glanced at him one more time before returning to assist you. âdidnât he basically cheat?!â the shorter one turned around to face johnny who was too busy flirting with the next contestants, âyeah yeah you could do anything as long as you make the girl squirt, simâ he waved him off.
âwhy the fuck am i just knowing this?!â
at the end of the competition, sunghoonâ as predicted won. he walked out of that place with not only an upset jaeyun and a hundred dollar bill, but also the love of his life.
a,note. thanks for reading !! (âșŁâĄâșŁ)âĄ
#sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon smut#sunghoon smut#sunghoon scenarios#sunghoon fanfic#park sunghoon#enhypen#enha x reader#enha smut#enha hard thoughts#enha hard hours#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fanfic#enhypen sunghoon#enha scenarios#enha imagines#enhypen drabble#enhypen imagines#enhypen smut#park sunghoon hard hours#park sunghoon fanfic#park sunghoon fic#park sunghoon scenarios#enha sunghoon#enhypen ff#enhypen x reader
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â unconcealable
- gojo satoru x reader
your boyfriend may not show it, but the six eyes are his burden to bear. you know it firsthand when he falls into your arms for the first time
genre: teen!gojo, fluff, hurt/comfort, flashback and fast-forward to dad!gojo later
note: hello hello iâm alive~ i have this little thing of fluff/comfort pampering in my head throughout my vacation and itâs been a long time since i last wrote about teen!gojo so here it is :D will proofread later when i get the chance!
a part of gojo's love entries
general masterlist
Back in 2006â
âSatoru, move awayââ
âNuh, uh! Iâm staying! Youâre too soft~â
âSatoru, If Yaga-sensei walks in⊠heâll think weâre doing something indecent!â
âMmm, don't care~â
This is the gym. Anyone could walk in. And yet your boyfriend of three weeks, Gojo Satoru, claimed his place by resting his head on your lap and squeezing his eyes shut so comfortably⊠like a cat.
You sighed, vexed and almost giving upâ and then you noticed just how good-looking he was. Not that you just realized it now, but his long eyelashes, his smooth skin, white hair...
You have snagged a heartthrob. Or at least he could be if it wasn't for his questionable tendencies.
âSatoru, Iâm being serious,â you griped, blinking back your pounding heart and starting to get anxious if anyone would see the two of you on the floor, with him over you. âGet up. Now.â
He knitted his brows together. âSo stingy... Canât your dashing boyfriend get five more minutes?â
âNo. Up. Now.â You learnt by experience that the more you indulged Satoru, the more you would be inclined to comply as well. So before he dragged you into that hole...
âHmph! No!â
âIâll really flip you if you donât moveâ!â
And thatâs finally when he cracked his eyes open, totally pouting. âSo mean! My head is hurting, you know! I just want to rest a bit!â
You were somewhat taken aback by his little outburst but he really got up this time, and then he stalked away, mumbling complaints.
"Some girlfriend you are... so not considerate..." he pursed his lips together, seemingly hurt as he made his way out.
That almost annoyed you greatly, and you were about to retort back when to your shock, he suddenly clutched his head and staggered. "Ahhâ"
"Satoru!"
You sprinted to him and caught him as he wobbled, supporting his weight.
"Are you okay? What happened?!" you were so spooked that you went down with him to the floor again. And you immediately pulled him to you when he heaved a shuddering breath.
"I'm okayâ" he said in a pant, pressing his eyes together so tightly. "I'm okay, I'm okay! Don'tâ"
"You're not, you idiot!"
Something with his eyes. It just dawned to you that he didn't wear his sunglasses today, and by instinct, you wrapped your arms around him, pressing him close to your chest.
"Is it hurting badly now?" you worriedly asked, keeping him tight in your embrace. "Do you want me to get you something?"
Contrary to your worries, what Satoru was more focused on was the exponential warmth that enveloped him. He had a migraine for a while there, but you so easily anchored him, making it somehow hurt less.
"You said Yaga-sensei will catch us and think we're having sex," he sullenly accused to hide the sudden blush spreading quickly on his face. "You didn't care about me just a minute ago."
"That's... a minute ago!" you hissed. "Now I'm worried!"
Your response made him smile despite himself. Satoru found comfort in the darkness of being squished against your boobs... perhaps way more than he thought he would.
"Then let me stay like this for a while. I'll be okay in a jiffy, 'kay?"
"Hmm," you hummed, absent-mindedly stroking his soft hair. You started to feel bad for chasing him away earlier, and squeezed him. "Does your head hurt often?"
"Whoa, it's only when I'm like this that you'll touch me so openly," he responded with a mock sigh, and you fought the urge not to roll your eyes. "Poor me."
"Poor you indeed. So answer me, does it, or does it not?"
"Nah, it's just how it is sometimes. Just some side effects of my eyes, you see."
"Why don't you wear your glasses today?"
"...Nanami broke them after I ate his last doughnut."
"You..." you almost giggled, and yet so exasperated at the same time. But the way Satoru squeezed your waist to hug you in return made you spare him.
You two stayed like that for a while, and when the bell rang to indicate the start of the next period, you asked him again. "Are you okay now?"
"Mm-hm, yeah, much better."
"Then let's go back to your class. I'll help you go there."
"Ehh..." But Satoru, ever the stubborn one, just buried his face into you, holding on tight and not letting go at all. "No."
You frowned. "Whyâ"
"Don't wanna move~ your boobs are just too good..."
"â? Whatâ"
"They're soooo soft. Seems jiggly too? Ah, my pain is healed! Oh! When we get married, will I get to bite them tooâ"
"Satoru, you!"
Long story short, you two missed the next period just because Satoru nagged you to stay with him... and at the end of it all, the ones who opened the doors to the gym were Nanami and Haibara, who immediately went to report to Yaga and red-faced respectively.
Back to presentâ
"Time for your teardrops!"
Satoru squeezed the bottle of eyedrops, lining it up with the striking blue eyes of his six-year-old son, an cute little pumpkin who was a carbon copy of him in every way, as he laid his head on his lap.
"Mmngh," his son squirmed as the water made contact with his sensitive eyes, and squeezed both eyes shut as soon as his papa was done.
Having inherited his eyes, the boy had started to feel pain whenever he accidentally overused them. Satoru knew the feeling well, and as much as he tried to humor him, something inside him prickled whenever he saw him getting teary-eyed due to the pain.
"Still stings?" he asked with a frown. "Want to use blindfold cover your eyes, hmm?"
Your son mumbled, "...no."
"What do you want then?"
"...I want mama."
Satoru snorted, pinching his boy's plump cheek fondly. "Same, kiddo. I want mama too."
The little boy cracked his eyes open out of spite. "You always bother her everyday."
"It's not as if you do not but whatever." Satoru pursed his lips as he stared at his boy. "If only I can put those rotting grandpas in elderly home, your mama can be freed from missions."
The kid snuggled close to his lap, seeking comfort, and suddenly, he felt flash of warmth burst inside him, realizing that his little munchkin wanted him to make him feel better.
"Look, I'm not mama, but I can do this tooâ" he hoisted his son, and hugged him close, hiding his little face into his sturdy chest. "Here you go. Better?"
The little baby that forever connects him to you. Satoru loved his son as much as he loved you.
He had no one to really comfort him in the early days of misusing his eyesâ they only told him that it was the price for the greatness he would possess. Until you did. You didnât speak of power or strength. Each time he suffered from those migraines back then, you would hold him close.
And so, he'd be damned if the same thing happened to his precious son. He wouldn't let him be told thatâhe would do his best to soothe him, to make him feel safe.
"Tomorrow we're getting kikufuku, yeah?" he said with a smile, patting his sonâs back gently. "And ice cream too."
"Mmm... 'kay..." the boy replied. "Papa... sleepy..."
"Then sleep, kid. I'll wake you when mama comes back, yeah?"
You. The baby. The two of you were always the center of his world. As he too drifted off to sleep beside his son, he thought that chasing after you was most definitely the greatest decision he made from that blue spring that would never return in his life.
Epilogue
"I'm home!"
Your mission ended with a bang as you completely obliterated the cursed spirit. You went home with a spring in your steps, thinking that your silly husband and cute son would be waiting for you in this afternoon.
But no one greeted you back, and you found yourself walking to your master bedroom, only to be floored by the sight.
Satoru had dozed off so unguardedly, but he had one protective arm over your son, who was also sleeping. They looked like a pair of twins, and the way your son curled up to your husband melted your heart so much that it brought a wide smile on your face.
Click! Click! You took several photos so you would be able to look at their sleepy state whenever you wanted. But as you marveled at the photographs, suddenly a sneaky hand yanked youâ
"Whoaâ!"
"Shh, you'll wake him up, mama," Satoru sleepily grinned as he smooched your face. "You took so long, I missed you."
"I finished one day early," you huffed, but then your expression softened as you gazed at your sleeping son. "Seems like both of you are getting along well while I was gone~"
"I fed him mochi and cookies, of course he'll be obedient."
"â! I told you he'll get cavities soon if you don't limit the sweets intake!"
"Oh? Then we just have to have another baby who won't get cavities just as you wish then~"
"That's not how it works! Satoru, youâ!"
#đđđŁđ đđđĄđđđđ #gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#satoru gojo x reader#jjk drabbles#gojo satoru#satoru x reader#jjk imagines#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru fluff#jjk fluff#gojo x you#satoru gojo fluff#jjk x reader fluff#gojo fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk fic#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#gojo satoru imagines#dad!gojo#jjk gojo satoru#jutusu kaisen x reader#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo
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âgive me the first tasteâ | 10k
logan howlett x f!reader
part 2 of âGUILTY PLEASUREâ
"Your hungry flirt borders intrusion / And I'm building memories on things we have not said / Full is not heavy as empty, not nearly, my love / Give me the first taste / Let it begin, heaven cannot wait forever / Darling, just start start the chase, I'll let you win." The First Taste by Fiona Apple
SUMMARY: From the moment you first laid eyes on Logan, you knew he was a tough nut to crack. But if thereâs one thing you love, itâs a challenge. As your relationship grows, youâre determined to show him that, in this universe, he can also be loved.
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni - smut 18+ fluff. angst. drinking. dirty talk. slow-burnish. age-gap (reader is 25). once again wade saves the day. domestic!logan. soft dom!logan. logan calls reader âkidâ. they watch (500) days of summer. oral sex (f and m receiving). fingering. thigh riding. thumb sucking. throat fucking. multiple orgasms. unprotected p in v. creampie (i would say iâm sorry but iâd be lying)
AUTHORâS NOTE: jeez. hi guys!!! hope youâre doing alright. this is the 2nd part to âguilty pleasure.â writing for these two has been a total rollercoaster, but god was it worth it. as i always tell you, english isnât my first language, so if you come across any mistake and you feel like letting me know, thereâs no problem. thank you so much for all the support youâve been giving my posts. iâm happy strangers out there take the time to read my silly stories :)
A girl and a mutant walk into an apartmentâŠ
Actually, youâre still trying to come up with the rest of the joke. But one thingâs true: Loganâs about to set foot in your place.
You curse under your breath, putting both your hands to work as you struggle to open the door. âFucking swollen wood. I hate humidity,â you mutter, glancing back at Logan, who frowns as you keep trying different maneuvers to get the door to function properly.
Itâs a shitty situation overall. And having that gorgeous man practically glued to your back isnât helping in any way. You can tell he wants to give you a hand, but youâre not having itâwomen in STEM or something of the sort.
âMay Iââ he starts, though you cut him off before he can finish.
âIâve got this. Just need toââ you say, ramming your shoulder into the door with enough force to make it finally give away. Almost stumbling over the carpet but managing to catch yourself, you sigh in relief. Meanwhile, Logan stands still, scrutinizing you until you gesture for him to enter. âWelcome to the smallest apartment in New York City. It's nothing fancy, but itâs got everything you need for a comfortable stay on a budget. Make yourself at home!â
Logan narrows his eyes, the tiniest smirk playing on his lips before stepping inside. Each of his movements seems to be premeditated as he tosses his jacket onto the couch, surveying the room. A portrait of when you were a kid, probably six or seven years old, catches his attention. He tilts his head, picking up the picture to examine it more closely, and then flashes you a lopsided grin. âHow cute.â
âWell, Iâve changed a lot,â you take the picture from his hands, returning it to the shelf where he had gotten it from.Â
âWell,â he echoes, mocking your tone, âyour beauty certainly hasnât.â
His eyes bore into you as you meet his gaze. What amazes you most is that heâs being completely honest. In a heartbeat, you look away, wondering whatâs gotten into you. Usually, youâre not this awkwardâyouâve learned how to take compliments over the years, knowing how to smile just right, to flutter your eyelashes. To blush and giggle in command. Those were the tools that helped you to survive countless first datesâyour dearest aces up your sleeve.
Thereâs no use denying that they remained just that: first, failed dates. You hope you never have to go back to dating apps after this.
âAre you hungry? âCause Iâm starving,â you say, trying to walk away from him, although heâs faster, catching your hand in his.Â
âHey,â he urges you to make eye contact with him, his voice perplexingly soft. âIs everything okay?â
You nod so vigorously that you nearly strain your neck. âIâm fine, I swear. I just never get past this point.â
Inching closer, he presses his lips together for a split second, his brows furrowing in confusion. âYou lost me there.â
âGuys who come into my apartment donât tend to call back,â you admit, a flush creeping up your face, cheeks getting hotter. âI happen to believe itâs a curse, though Iâve kissed, like, a hundred toads so far and it still wonât break.â
âSo yâthink youâre gonna scare me off,â he raises an eyebrow, grinning. His rough fingers become gentle as they tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. âItâs sweet. Should be the other way around.â
Wow. You two are a match made in heaven.
As you detach yourself from his embrace and head to the kitchen, you decide to look for something edible in the fridge, finding different trays of food from days ago, none of which look appetizing or suitable for feeding the Tin Woodman standing behind you.
All of a sudden, the unmistakable metallic sound of Loganâs claws unsheathing rings in your ears, forcing you to spin around. The image that unfolds before you is peculiar, to say the least: heâs cornering your cat against the door.
Why is he about to fight a cat?
âPlease donât kill him?â you take a step in his direction and scoop the little ball of white fur into your arms. Logan stares at both of you, eyes squinted and brows knitted. âIâm sure heâs the cutest feline youâve ever seen. Have mercy on him.â
âI didnât know you had a cat.â
âEarnest wasnât aware of your existence either,â you reply, scratching along the animalâs back. He purrs beside your neck, his yellowish eyes never leaving Loganâs. âEarnest, this is Logan. He has claws just like you.â
âDonât you dare compare me to that,â Logan warns you, retracting his claws with a sigh. You canât help but wonder if he ever feels tranquil, at peace. âYâknow, youâve doomed him to bad fortune with that name. Is he at least toilet trained?â
âAre you hating on The Importance of Being Earnest?â you ask, expecting a retort, though apparently the playâs title doesnât ring a bell for him. âOscar Wilde?â
âWho do you think youâre talkinâ to, kid?â
Nowâs your time to roll your eyes, setting the cat down and letting it run away. He likes to hide in the bathroomâdonât ask why, because not even you know the answer to that. You flick your gaze up back to Logan, placing your hands on your hips. âSee, you gave him trust issues.â
âHeâll survive. Donât they have seven lives?â
This is the perfect conversation to have with someone who just ate you out thirty minutes ago: how many lives do cats have. Jesus.
At some point, Logan flops onto the couch, stretching out. You shudder as you hear him crack his neck, the popping sound getting on your nerves. He pats the empty side of the sofa, spreading his thighs until heâs almost taking up all the space. âCome here.â
Putting aside all your thoughts, you accept the invitation. You sit down, motionless, and his arm grazes the cushion behind your head, pulling you closer to him. You rest your cheek on his chest, letting out a deep sigh, one that youâve been holding in since you got to the apartment. Is it possible that he knows you craved this? This proximity, this kind of affection. To be heldâitâs been your only wish for months. He drums his fingers on your shoulder blades, then starts rubbing your back ever so lightly.
Far from dozing off, you feel alive.
Itâs hard not to lose track of time and space when you find yourself immersed in the warmth he offers, and thatâs when you realize how deeply youâre falling for this man. âLogan?â the mere thought of asking him whatâs been on your mind terrifies you. The last thing you want is to ruin thingsâor whatever it is that you have. He hums, a low, heavy sound in his throat, indicating you to continue. âI have a question.â
âAsk away.â
You lift your face from his chest and look him in the eye. The cityâs still alive outside, with music and chatter sneaking in through the window. Everything seems to be perfect, and you wish you could stay like thisâjust staring at him as if he were a painting in a museum, and you the critic who canât stop writing articles about its beauty.
Okay, that was⊠weirdly specific.Â
Logan tries to hide his smile as you peck his lips repeatedly. For a moment, you almost forget what you were going to ask him in the first place. But then heâs ready to listen, and you a wave of nausea washes over you.
âI know that we came here to⊠engage in adult practices.â
âFucking, you mean.â
âI didnât want to be that straightforward, but yeah,â you say, shaking your head as to rearrange your thoughts. âWould you mind if we stayed like this?â to emphasize your point, you kick your shoes off and put your legs on top of his lap. He observes the whole sequence without daring to utter a word. âDonât get me wrong. Iâd love to try that too. I truly do. But⊠right now, all I want is to cuddle,â heâs still silent, making you even more nervous. âIâm sorry. Is that okay with you?â
His whole body engulfs yours, your cheek coming to rest once again in its original position. You can feel the rhythmic beating of his heart, each breath he takes, the air he exhales dampening your nape. Logan peppers your neck with chaste kisses before pressing his lips to your temple. His voice comes out strained, partially muffled by your hair. âWho do you take me for, huh?â heâs right there, beside your ear, fucking everywhere. There isnât a single centimeter of your exposed skin that he isnât touching, marking as his. You donât give him an answer, in part because youâre unsure of what to say. He takes your silence as a cue to keep talking. âLet me take you to bed.â
âI can walk on my own.â
âI know,â he mutters, standing up with you in his arms, one arm beneath your knees and the other one under your shoulders. Loganâs not used to being this cautious, this patient with someone heâs known for less than two weeks. You see it in his eyes when he lets his guard downâsomething that has cracked, a shell thatâs been broken.
As he places you gently on top of the covers, he lingers for a moment, crouching beside the bed and searching for your lowered gaze. His fingers are warm as he tilts your chin up. âI didnât come here just to have sex with you. That was a possibility, of courseâbut itâs not the main reason why Iâm here,â he rasps, words accompanied by the light brush of his lips against yours for a quick, brief kiss. âI care about you. A lot. Iâm fine with whatever we do as long as I get to be close to you,â he grabs your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He then goes back to his usual bossy self, his demeanor changing. âAnd I donât want to hear you apologizing for not wanting to have sex ever again. Understood?â
âYes, sir.â
âNow youâre making jokes?â
âI canât have serious conversations,â you confess, observing the look of pure confusion on his face. âItâs true. I once spoke at a funeral and they cut me off forty seconds into my speech.â
Logan laughs at your sudden confession, his eyes crinkling at the edges. Rising to his feet, he begins to unbutton his flannel, pausing after the first few buttons are undone, waiting for your approval. âDo you want me to stay tonight?âÂ
âIf thatâs what you want.â
âIt is what I want.â
âAre you sure?â
âDonât make me change my mind.â
His words donât hide any real threatâthat you know.
You stifle your laughter, shedding your clothes. Instead of going to the bathroom to change, you toss your work clothes carelessly to the floor, opting for an old pair of pajamas that are the complete opposite of sexy. They surely have seen better days.
Loganâs eyes trail over you, taking his time to analyze the faded lettering on your wrinkled shirt. âKeep calm and eat pizza?â he reads aloud.
âHey. I bought it when I was seventeen.â
âYou could use a new wardrobe.â
âWell, what about you?â you tease, toying with his belt. âYouâre gonna sleep like this in my bed?â
âCanât wait for me to get my shirt off, huh?â he grins, that all-too-familiar smile on his lips.
You play along, folding your arms over your chest. âYou think so highly of yourself.â
Without breaking eye contact, Logan unbuckles his jeans, letting them pool around his ankles. He then shrugs off his flannel, leaving him in just his briefs and vest. You scan his body, and the room suddenly feels a hundred degrees hotter, the air between you thickening. Logan notices your reaction, chuckling. âDonât get too excited. This is all youâre getting today.â
âI think Iâve already heard that before.â
âKid.â
You raise your hands in surrender, showing him your palms and mouthing âsorryâ. Approaching your bed, you pull back the covers and slip into it. When you see Logan still standing there, you frown. âWhere are your manners? Come here. Iâm very impatient.â
He grumbles something under his breath, but he doesnât make you wait long. He proceeds to get under the sheets beside you, occupying that side of the bed thatâs always been empty. As you both settle in, facing each other, you canât help but giggle, your contagious laugh getting to him. âWhat now?â
âYouâre beautiful,â you whisper, tracing the bridge of his nose with your index finger, a featherlight touch that has him closing his eyes. In the soft glow of the night, with the cityâs distant sounds filtering in, he looks breathtaking. âI mean it.â
âDo you have an off switch?â
âIâm⊠not sure. Letâs find out tomorrow.â
âYou need to sleep,â he pulls you onto his chest with firm but gentle hands. He intertwines his legs with yours, holding you close.
âWait. I have a game to play.â
âItâs late.â
âPlease?â
He sighs. âOkay.â
âWe have to make confessions until we fall asleep.âÂ
âYou just want to talkâthat doesnât even qualify as a game.â
âIt does in this universe,â you reply, feeling his chest rumble with a chuckle as you settle more comfortably against him. âIâll start: remember the first night you came to the bar?â he hums in acknowledgment. âIt wasnât Burger Night. We donât serve food. I just wanted an excuse to talk to you.â
He kisses the top of your head, his arms tightening around you. âI knew. You donât have a kitchen down there, baby,â he falls silent, taking his time to come up with a confession of his own. âI have a fear of flying.â
âReally? You, of all people?â
âI wasnât expecting to be judged.â
âOh, donât be such a crybaby,â you tease, burying your face further into the crook of his shoulder, inhaling his scent. He shivers slightly where your nose touches his skin. âI like you. Itâs kind of scary, and Iâm sure saying something like this probably goes against the rules of dating 101, but I do. I feel safe with you, likeâlike this is where Iâm supposed to be.â
Almost as if the pieces of the puzzle finally fit together, you think to yourself, though the words stay unspoken.
Youâve come to learn that Loganâs not a man of many wordsâheâs more of the âshow, donât tellâ kind of guy. So when he makes you lift your face, youâre not surprised by the way he kisses you: hungrily. Passionately, like a starved man at an all-you-can-eat buffet. A soft whimper gets lost somewhere in your throat as his tongue makes its way into your mouth, languidly stroking yours.
âWe didnât brush our teeth,â you whisper against his lips, laughing when he groans in exasperation.
âYou love having the final say, donât you?â
âIâm being serious, Logan. Cavities are a real issue for me.â
âYou can always get new teeth.â
âBut my morning breathââ
âItâll stink anyway, and so will mine,â he responds, taking a deep breath and clearing his throat once he settles into his ideal sleep position. âGood night.â
âNight,â you murmur, nuzzling your cheek against his neck. Despite your efforts to ignore it, being cradled like this feels incredible. You canât believe you went twenty-five years without it.
Just as youâre about to drift off, curiosity strikes. âCan you get tattoos?â
âBub, I was actually falling asleep.â
âOh, okay. Sorry,â you mumble, feeling a bit sheepish.
More silence.
âLogan?â
âHmm?â
âWhat was the Great Depression like?â
âFuck me,â he mutters, his voice gruff as he shifts lightly. âIt was fine. Now go to sleep.â
And you do, but not for long. An abrupt coldness wakes you up, eyes wide open, feeling disoriented. Itâs still pitch black outside, far quieter than when you first fell asleep. The clock on your nightstand reads itâs 3:17 am, though it feels like youâve only been in bed for five minutes.
Then you see himâheâs twitching in his sleep on the far side of the bed, his painful grunts reaching your ears. Most of what he says is unintelligible, but thereâs one word he keeps repeating over and over again without fail: âNo.â
You donât usually have nightmares. Whatâs the best way to wake someone from one? Youâre still thinking when he starts mumbling again, his voice thick with distress, and now heâs throwing his arms in the air as if he were fighting off somethingâor someoneâin his dreams.
Pressing your hands to his cheeks, you attempt to hold his face steady. He clenches his fists, his breath quickening the more he battles whateverâs haunting him. âLogan,â you whisper at first, subtly shaking his shoulders, but his eyebrows stay furrowed, deep in his nightmare. This time, you tighten your grip, fully sitting on top of him. âLogan. Logan! Wake up!â
Without warning, youâre on your back, pinned against the mattress. Loganâs straddling your hips, caging you in with his body, the weight of his adamantium skeleton pressing down. Your hands are trapped beneath his, and you watch as he clenches his jaw, teeth bared in a way that looks painful. His eyes are so dark and wild you barely recognize him, prominent veins throbbing in his neck with each labored breath he takes.
âLogan,â your own voice sounds unnatural, forced, as you do your best to bring him back to reality. âItâs me. Youâre alright.â
That seems to get through him. Logan stares at you in disbelief, his eyes softening as they take in your terrified expression. He abruptly pulls away, retreating to the nearest wall. Heâs gasping for air, slamming his eyes shut, his legs trembling. The only sound you can hear is his rapid breathing. You get up from the bed, taking a step in his direction, but you donât manage to go any further since he stops you with a shout.
âStay right there!â heâs growling, pointing his finger at you. âIâm serious. Donât come any closer.â
âLoganâŠâ
âPlease, no!â his voice increases in pitch, not being able to meet your eyes. âPlease. Just stay there.â
You comply, not wanting to upset him any further. Sitting back on your knees, you try to appear calm. A man so strong, capable of things you canât even understand. A weapon turned against himself now stands before you, pushing you away as if his presence were poisonous. He slumps to the floor, the fabric of his vest soaked with sweat.
Once heâs fully conscious, you cautiously crawl toward him, watching his every move. On a random day, this might have been funny for both of you, but right now, thereâs no room for laughter. Logan shakes his head, his shoulders tensing when you reach out to hug him, wrapping your arms around his broad frame. It takes him a couple of minutes, but eventually, his body sags against yours. For a while, neither of you speaks. You just thread your fingers through his hair, hoping the closeness will help soothe him. âFeeling better?â you whisper in the shell of his ear, and he pulls back to look you in the eye. You caress his cheek, his stubble rough against your skin. âWelcome back.â
âIâm sorry,â itâs the first thing he says, covering your hand with his. One by one, he kisses your knuckles, still shaking his head. âI donât know what came over me.â
âYou had a nightmareâitâs not like you could control it.â
âBut I couldâve hurt you,â he says, lowering his gaze to your wrists, where his fingerprints have left their mark. âGod. Iâm so sorry. I have to go.â
âWait!â you grab his arm, your mouth setting in a hard line, stopping him from leaving. âDonât run away from me, not now. Donât push me away, Logan.â
âI couldâve done something much worse.â
âBut you didnât. It was a nightmare, baby. You didnât know,â you kiss his forehead, hoping to talk some sense into him. âPlease, stay. Letâs try to get some more sleep.â
âWhat ifââ
You hold his face close to yours, your noses brushing. âYou wonât hurt me.âÂ
This time, he lets you keep him close, the roles now reversed. You can see him fighting his exhaustion, not wanting to fall asleep. But the more you play with his hair, the harder it is for him to stay awake.
âIâm alright,â he says, seemingly reading your mind. Itâs hard to tell whether heâs reassuring you or himself.
âI know,â you knead his shoulder, aiming to ease the tension knotted there. âYou better sleep, or I might start rambling again.â
A faint, tired hum escapes him, at long last allowing his eyes to close. âI like hearing you talk,â he murmurs, his breath warm against your collarbone, drifting off soon after that.
You continue to hug him, feeling the weight of his body gradually relax against yours as his breathing evens out. The room is quiet, but your mind is far from it: a tornado of emotions swirls within youâconcern, relief, love, and something else you canât quite decipher. It isnât until sleep finally claims you too that your brain stops going a hundred kilometers an hour.
The most surreal Sunday night of your whole life.
âSo⊠when will you let me see Lolo again?â
Wadeâs question makes you stop mid-pour, flicking your eyes between the drink and him. A few seats away, you hand a glass to Adam. Returning to where Wadeâs currently sitting, you dry your hands on your apron. âWhy are you even here?â you ask, raising an eyebrow, and he gives half a shrug. âLast time I checked, I wasnât holding him against his will.â
âHeâs been crashing at your place almost every night. You have your own methods, woman,â he raises one finger, then quickly adds another, pointing at your shirt. âTwo methods, in fact.â
At that, you laugh mirthlessly, shaking your head with a grin. âIâm surprised anyone would willingly date you.â
âI could ask you the same thing,â he retorts, taking a tentative sip of his beer and leaning back in his chair.
You glance at him while you wipe down the bar, looking for something to occupy your hands. âHeâs not my boyfriendâyet.â
Wade mimics a punch in his chest, just where his heartâs supposed to be, though youâre starting to question whether he has one. His lips form a small, exaggerated pout. âThat must hurt, doll. You got yourself into a situationship with a goddamn fossil. Good luck getting out of that.â
âItâs not that bad,â you say, rolling your eyes. âWeâre cool this way. Thereâs absolutely no need for a title.â
âOkay, letâs rehearse that one more time because you look like youâre about to cry,â he lifts an eyebrow, drawing nearer. âYou want the title, right?â
âI donât.â
He props his chin on his hand, laughing at you. âYes, you do. You canât fool me.â
âI said I donât.â
âI said I donât,â he mocks you, kicking his legs and puckering his lips.
You canât help but throw the towel down on the counter with irritation, giving in. âOkay! Of course, I want the fucking title.â
âThere she is!â he exclaims, throwing his hands up in a triumphant gesture. âGlad weâre speaking the truth now,â he tilts his head to the side, noticing your sudden silence. âHey, drop the long face. Iâm sure heâs been thinking about it. In order to understand Logan, I usually compare him to elders over ninety.â
âWhy would you do that?â you ask, your tone a mix of mild annoyance and curiosity.
âJust think about it! Senior citizens didnât date for too long in the past. Theyâd go straight from strangers to lovers. Take my grandparents, for example: in the span of one year, they met at a party, then got married, and had five kids. Do you really want to have a litter of Loganâs grumpy, hairy puppies?â
âWade, thatâs not even possible.â
âThe point is,â he continues, finishing his beer and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, âLoganâs rusty in this area, alright? Iâd bet a thousand dollars he probably dated Cleopatra.â
âHow did you pass History in high school?â
âI never graduated, but keep that between us,â he lifts his shoulders, shrugging. He spins the empty bottle, contemplating his next words. âYou should tell him how you feel and what you want. Thatâs what works best for Vanessa and me. Itâs easier that wayâyou canât expect him to just guess.â
You wrap your arms around yourself. âI just wish heâd realize it on his own.â
âWell, sometimes you need to give the other person a bit of guidance. Iâm just laying out the basics of a relationship here. Did your parents hate each other or something?â
The irony of it all. âThey got divorced when I was little.âÂ
âOh, god,â Wade sighs, rubbing his temples before glancing at you. âLet me get this straight: Mommy and Daddy werenât exactly the poster children for love. And you also happen to be a bartender. Anything else, honey? Please tell me youâre at least getting laid, because otherwise, Iâm going to feel tremendously sorry for you and your mental health.â
Just then, you hear your name being called. Smiling at Wade, you mumble: âSaved by the bell.â Once youâre back from taking some orders, Wade jumps to his feet, coming around the counter to hug you.
âDude, whatâs the matter with you?â you ask, loosely returning the hug.Â
âYouâre a fucking survivor,â he whispers in your ear, genuinely sounding concerned. âI donât know how you do itâyou seem so put together. I wouldâve lost it by now. A life without sex sounds awful.â
âJesus, Wade! Get off!â you stretch your arm to punch him in the back, earning a groan from him. âBack to your seat, gentleman. I certainly donât need your pity.â
âIâm a certified sexologist. Your secretâs safe with me,â he declares with a smirk, gesturing to his empty beer. âBut first, Iâm gonna need more of this tasty apple juice.â
âI hope youâve got some cash on you,â you say, getting him another beer. âWhy do I get the feeling Logan would kill us if he knew weâre talking about this?â
âIsnât that what makes it even better?â
Swaying on your feet, you scrunch your nose, momentarily lost in thought. âHe wonât let me touch him. I donât know if itâs me that does something wrong. We do have our⊠moments, but he takes care of himself. And usually in the bathroom.â
Wade goes white in front of you. âHow long has this been going on?â
âOver a month.â
âOh. Thatâs bad, like, really bad.â
âThanks! Iâll be sleeping on the highway tonight. You can always join me.â
âDoll, itâs nothing that canât be fixed, alright?â he waves his hand dismissively, then sets his palms flat on the counter. âI know Iâm starting to sound like a broken record, but talking to him is your best bet. This isnât something you can just brush under the carpet. Youâre like a goddamn radioâput it to good use.â
Just as youâre about to reply, you spot Logan entering the bar. You raise a hand in greeting, waving at him. He meets your gaze and smiles briefly, and so your eyes drift to Wadeâs, shooting him a warning look. âIf you keep this to yourself, I wonât charge you for today,â you mutter through gritted teeth, to which he answers by pretending to zip his mouth closed.
Logan takes a seat next to him, ignoring his presence. Instead, he focuses entirely on you. âHey, kid.â
âHey, homey.â
âHiya, Wade,â Wade greets himself with a mock cheer, patting his own back, which makes you laugh. He turns to Logan and his whole face lights up. âIâm afraid to tell you I canât sleep when youâre not around.â
Logan rolls his eyes. âGet your shit together.â
âYouâre the worst roommate ever! Canât believe you got yourself a girl and completely forgot about your bro,â Wade murmurs under his breath, just as his phone rings. âThank God. Iâve got to go. My love nuggetâs calling,â he announces, heading for the door. Before leaving, Wade blows the two of you a kiss. âI hate you both, but I also love you. Peace out, my friends!â
Logan and you exchange glances. âHeâs a funny guy, isnât he?â
âYou could say that,â he replies, leaning in to kiss you on the lips. Logan intends to deepen the kiss, but you pull away after a couple of seconds. He frowns, clearly confused. âThatâs how you greet me?â
You bite your lip, trying to suppress a giggle. âMy tip jar is practically empty, and I hate to say it, but itâs your fault.â
âDo you want me to say Iâm sorry?â
âOh, no.â
âGood, âcause Iâm not,â he plants a quick kiss on your cheek, making you smile. âYou have classes tomorrow, right?â
âYeah, at 9 am,â you almost grunt, not feeling too enthusiastic about it. âIâm gonna need your help. I canât sleep through my alarm, okay? The professor said tomorrowâs class is an important one. Midterms are right around the corner, and I canât take the liberty of failing them.â
âThat wonât happen,â he assures you, and you believe him. âI can be of help, donât worry. You wonât oversleep.â
Oh, Logan. Sweet, lying Logan.
Turns out you ended up oversleeping. Twenty-five years on this earth, and you still havenât learned not to trust a man, even if his puppy-dog eyes silently beg you to do otherwise. The thing isâyou love them. You love men. And youâre especially fond of the one currently sleeping in your bed.
The first rays of sunshine hit your face, waking you up. You attempt to raise a hand to shield your eyes, but moving any limbs feels like a Herculean task. A warm body is pressed against your back, one veiny arm draped over your stomach. Logan remains fast asleep behind you, his steady breathing succeeding in making you feel at ease. You reach back, running your fingers through his messy hair, and he grumbles in his sleep, instinctively pulling you closer.
What a nice, domestic morning. Yep, youâre getting used to this. And nope, you donât regret it, not even in the slightest bit.
Though there must be a mistake, because youâre preeeeetty sure you had something important to do.Â
Oh. You have classes. Hadâpast tense.
You reach for your nightstand, blindly groping for your phone. The charger is lying on the floor, the plastic of it all damaged. Perhaps Earnest had chewed on it while you were sleeping? You gently pry Loganâs arm off you, sitting up, and your bleary eyes land on something barely peeking out from under the bed.
Itâs your fucking phone. The screen is completely shattered, with three distinct holes in the middle of it. Three holes, how strange! You canât help but wonder who might have left them. Clutching your pillow, you whack Logan in the face with it. âRise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!â
He groans, trying to take the pillow away from you. âWhat the fuck is wrong with you, kid?â
âI wish I had a UNO reverse card because I should be the one asking you that!â you jab your finger into his chest, showing him the ruined phone. âYou broke my fucking phone!â
âWhat?â he asks, voice laden with sleep, still disoriented. He holds the phone, carefully scrutinizing it. âI think I donât know how to hit the snooze button.â
âNo shit, Sherlock. I believe youâve made that very clear,â you huff, tossing the phone aside as you flop back onto the mattress. The clock on your nightstand says 11:05 am, and you cover your face with your hands, taking a deep breath. âNext time, when it goes off, just wake me up and Iâll do it.â
Logan settles beside you, resting his head on his forearm as he watches you. âIâm sorry, bub. Iâll get you a new one.â
âItâs fine,â you murmur, sighing. This is your free ticket to be a menace. âI shouldâve known dinosaurs and phones would never get along. My bad, pal.â
You donât even get to see his reaction because he starts tickling you, the room filling with your laughter. Squealing, you try to wriggle away, but his fingers dig into your ribs, expertly finding your most ticklish spots. Your giggles escalate into breathless laughter, your eyes squeezed shut as you desperately attempt to push him away. Heâs relentless, chuckling when his own laughter bubbles up.Â
âL-logan, stop!â you gasp between fits of laughter, aiming to grasp his hands.
âWe dinosaurs love tickling people. Sorry, sweetheart,â he manhandles you until youâre perched on his lap, fisting the fabric of your (his) shirt. Leaning forward, he captures your mouth in a heated kiss. âIâm sorry about the phone,â he slurs the words against your cheek, his lips trailing down to your neck. You tell him that itâs okay, trying to find a comfortable position on top of him, and thatâs when his thigh presses against your core, your eyes widening at the unexpected sensation. Loganâs no fool, noticing the way your breath hitches. âWhatâs wrong, baby? You woke up needy?â
âNo, I justââ you trail off as he does it again, his strong thigh coming in contact with your clothed cunt. You search for leverage by placing your hands on his shoulders, glancing at him. âLogan.â
âIâm all ears,â he rests his back against the headboard, the tent in his boxers impossible to ignore. âYou want to get off on my thigh,â he states with certainty. Itâs not a questionâitâs a full-on statement. He knows what you want, what you crave. âCome on then. Grind against it.â
You do as he says, not caring to think twice. You start moving, rubbing your wet pussy against his muscular thigh. The friction sends jolts of pleasure through you, and soon, youâre whimpering his name, your hands trailing down his abs. Why hadnât you tried this before? It feels fucking amazing.
From his position, Logan stares at you, his lips slightly parted, eyes clouded with lust. Your arousal drenches your panties, soaking through them, the fabric clinging to his coarse leg hair. He glances down at the mess youâre making, his grin widening as he takes in the sight. âGoddamn, woman. Iâm gonna make you clean it off, I swear to God.â
âNeed your help,â you whisper, lowering your head, the heat in your cheeks intensifying. The coil tightening inside you is almost unbearable. A kiss is what you lean in for, desperate for more, though Logan appears to have other plans. He fists your hair, pulling at your nape and yanking your head back. The roughness of the movement pulls a moan from your lips, your mouth parched like a desert.Â
âEyes up here, okay? You look at me when I make you come,â his raspy voice makes you feel tingly, each word sending shivers down your spine. His hands fiercely grab the flesh of your hips, guiding you, helping you grind harder against his thigh. You think youâre on the verge of drooling when you catch the way his abdomen flexes, working to push you toward that long-awaited release. âThatâs it, there you go,â he rasps, relishing the sounds heâs eliciting from you, each of your gasps feeding his desire.
Time slows as the warmth in your belly finally erupts, your eyes fighting to stay open through the aftershocks of your orgasm. No actual words leave your mouth, just a string of whines and moans, some carrying Loganâs name. He swallows every single sound you make, everything you give him, grunting as your legs tremble and shake atop him.
He lets you collapse onto your back, your breathing gradually evening out. âI think I saw fireworks behind my lids,â you confess, your mouth dry, expecting Logan to flop onto the mattress beside you. But he doesnât. Through your blurry vision, you contemplate as he positions himself between your parted legs, getting dangerously close to your cunt. âLogan, what are youâ Oh, fuck,â you moan mid-sentence when you feel him pulling your panties aside to lick a slow strip through your folds, collecting your arousal. He points his tongue, dipping it into your entrance, and you wince, squirming. âSanta Claus, is that you?â
Logan grins against you, closing his mouth around clit for a moment. He then shifts until heâs eye-to-eye with you, two of his fingers sliding into you in one smooth motion. âGive me another one,â he murmurs, his other hand slipping under your shirt to play with your nipples, pinching them.Â
You never imagined two fingers could bring such intense pleasure. You just lie there, taking it like a good girl, as Logan sometimes call you. âPlease, I need you,â you cry out, your fingernails scraping against his torso.
âI know, darlinâ. Iâm right here,â he rasps against your temple, moving his fingers in and out of you with more enthusiasm. But what he doesnât understand is that you need all of him. Your hands itch to touch him, to feel the weight of his cock. The corners of his mouth turn up as he watches you struggle to find words. âWish you could see yourself like this. Such a pretty girl, so gorgeous like this,â his fingers keep grazing that bundle of joy deep inside you, and he goes in for a kiss, the sour taste of your slick invading your taste buds. âTightest pussy Iâve ever had. Need to stretch you real good before fucking you with my cock.â
Bingo! That last sentence does it for you, and you come for the second time in the morning, your cunt clenching and spasming around his fingers. You hide your face in his neck, mouthing at his Adamâs apple. He hasnât trimmed his beard in days, and it shows because you can now feel a burning sensation on the soft skin of your inner thighs.
âYouâre allowed to break all my phones from now on,â you suggest, only to hear Loganâs laughter in your ear. He snakes a hand through your hair, shoving it back away from your face. You feel him kiss your sweaty forehead, and as you press yourself closer to his body, something hard nudges your hipbone.
Absentmindedly, you trace the waistband of his boxers with your index finger, your eyes snapping to his face. Logan freezes on the spot, and itâs almost as if heâs stopped breathing. Without a word, he rises from the bed, his movements sudden and almost mechanical. You watch him, puzzled, as he heads toward the bathroom, the intimacy of just moments ago being abruptly replaced by a dreadful silence.
âLogan, is everything okay? Do you need something?â you ask and he pauses at the bathroom door, his back to you. For a brief second, you think he might actually open up, but when he turns around, his expression is neutral, masking whatever thoughts are running through his mind. At last, he flashes you a quick smile.
âIâm fine,â he says, his tone gentle but distant. âJust gonna take a shower. Then we can have breakfast together, right?â
You nod, his words easing the growing sense of frustration gnawing at you. He disappears into the bathroom, and the sound of running water soon follows. You sink back into the bed, staring up at the ceiling. You take your pillow and bury your face in it, letting out a muffled groan. Thereâs something he isn't telling you, something hidden deep beneath his usual gruff exterior. Although you try to piece together the fragments of his behavior, they donât quite fit.
The minutes drag on, and the sound of the shower becomes a distant, constant background noise. You close your eyes, visualizing your happy place, but your thoughts keep spiraling. All you can do is waitâwait for him to come back and act as if nothing had happened.
Loganâs right there, just a few feet awayâyet in moments like these, he feels miles apart. Itâs one of those days in which, no matter how hard you try, you canât seem to bridge that distance.Â
It had all started with you asking Logan âHave you ever watched (500) Days of Summer?â
Of course, he had refused to watch the movie at first, and of course, you had threatened him with phoning Wade to let him know that Logan wanted to have a sleepover. That had done the trick.
You had asked for a day off at the bar, and surprisingly, your boss hadnât objected. That turn of events led to this moment: sprawled out on the couch with Logan, the two of you watching the final minutes of your favorite film. Logan takes a long drag of his cigar, eyes trained intently on the screen. Heâs only wearing sweatpants, which had caused your attention to drift from the plot a few times. The fact that you managed to sit through the entire movie without needing to pause it makes you feel particularly invincible.
Hey.
You again.
Yeah. I, uh, was just wondering if maybe after this, if, um, youâ you want to get some coffee or something.
Oh, Iâm sorry. Iâm sort of supposed to meet someone after this.
Okay.
âThat poor fella,â Logan murmurs, taking a slow sip of his beer. You look up at him from where your head rests on his lap, a contented smile playing on your lips. His fingers absently stroke your hair.
âJust wait,â you say, pointing to the screen of your laptop.
Sure.
Whatâs that?
Why not?
Okay. Well, then Iâll just, uhâ Iâll wait for you.
Weâ weâll figure it out.
Weâll figure it out.
âTheyâll figure it out!â you exclaim, but Logan quickly shushes you, his attention unwavering.
My nameâs Tom.
Nice to meet you. Iâm Autumn.
When the movie comes to an end, youâre met with Joseph Gordon-Levitt breaking the fourth wall, staring straight at the audience as if he knows heâs about to get himself into a mess with another girl named after a season. You sit up, your eyes eagerly searching for Loganâs. âSo? Did you like it? Iâve watched it seven times now. Canât understand how it gets better each time.â
Logan closes his mouth around his cigar, inhaling deeply before answering. âYeah, it was pretty good,â he says, his hand finding your cheek, thumb brushing softly against your skin. âSummerâs a bitch, though.â
âI respectfully disagree,â you tell him, grabbing his beer and giving it a try, only to grimace at the taste. Shuddering, you set it back down. âWhy donât you like her character?â
âWell, for starters, she did Tom dirty. Played with him like he was a damn rag doll.â
You raise an eyebrow, hugging a cushion closer to your chest as you lean back into the couch. âHe knew from the beginning she didnât want to be his girlfriend. Summer was clearâTom just though he was smart enough to change her mind.â
âThey acted like boyfriend and girlfriend the whole movie,â he scorns, placing his cigar down into the ashtray with a bit more force than necessary.
Is your first argument going to be over a movie? Exciting.
âLogan, they werenât even official.â
âBut she made it seem like they were,â he insists, the frustration in his voice growing.
âThey were in a situationshipâthe perfect example, really. Thatâs not the same as being a couple.â
His gaze dips to the floor, brows knitted in a deep frown. âI think youâre relying on the technicality that they never used those titles. I mean, they did everything together. Isnât that what normal couples do?â
Lord have mercy.
âLogan, who am I to you?â you inquire, crossing your arms over your chest.
He hesitates, narrowing his eyes, the question clearly catching him off guard. âYou areâwhat? I donât understand. Is this some kind of mind game youâre playing?â
âItâs actually very simple: if someone were to ask you about me, what would you say? Am I a friend? A bartender?â you inch forward, holding your breath, your tone faltering slightly. Meanwhile, Loganâs hands tighten into fists at his sides. âA fling? Your girlfriend? You complain so much about Summer, yet you canât even name what we have.â
The living room falls into a heavy silence. Logan blinks slowly, his forehead creasing as he processes your words. âWhy are you doing this to me?â
âBecause these are the kinds of conversations we need to have. I understand you donât want to have them, but I do.â
âFine. Then tell me what it is that you want,â he asks, his mouth snapping shut when he sees you snorting in response.
âI donâtâ I donât know! To know how you feel, if possible?â you stand up from the couch, taking the cushion with you. You grind your jaw, gnawing on your bottom lip. âWhy is it that every time I try to touch you, you push me away?â
He scrunches up his face, mirroring your movements and rising from his seat. âBub, can we please talk about this tomorrowââ
âNo! You donât get to make all the choices, thatâs not fair. Deciphering you isnât easy, Logan. Iâm not asking you to tell me everything youâve been through. I just wish I could know how you feel about me. I canât stand in front of you and pretend I donât mind where this is going, because Iâm more than sure Iâm falling in love with you. â
âYou canât. You shouldnât,â he says, his expression hardening. He turns his back to you, running his hands over his face in frustration before heading to the kitchen.
âWell, what were you expecting?â you follow him into the kitchen, finding Earnest on top of the fridge, beholding the scene with a curious gaze. âYou basically moved in here, gave me a free trial of what life with you might be like, and now you have the audacity to appear surprised when I tell you Iâve caught feelings?â salty tears start rolling down your cheeks, and you spread your arms wide in exasperation. âOh, but youâre right. How could Iâve been this stupid, to fall for the damned Wolverine!â you laugh bitterly, expecting him to break eye contact, but he doesnât. âYou think youâre so bad, so broken. Guess what: youâre not, because I love you, and I couldnât care less about your past. You may think youâre unlovable, but youâre not, you hear me?â
For a heartbeat, the world seems to pause. And so he says:
âYou are the most exasperating person I know.â
âWow. Thank you so much!â you retort, your voice dripping with sarcasm. You run a hand through your hair, infuriated. âThat makes me feel better!â
âLet me do the talking now,â he says, taking long strides toward you, and the proximity makes you lower your head. âYouâre not getting the final say today. Just because Iâm not over-sharing my feelings all the time doesnât mean I donât have them! In fact, I do. I may not express them openly, but they exist. And I wish you could see inside my head! Youâd be delighted at how much time I spend thinking about you,â you cackle at his words, rolling your eyes. His fingers grip your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. âThere hasnât been a single moment since the day we met that I have stopped wanting you. Your voice is like a goddamn radio that, no matter what I do, I canât turn off. Itâs like Iâm infected by you, and I hate it!â his eyes burn with a mix of anger and affectionpur, his pursed lips softening as he continues. âNo good ever comes from caring this much about someone. So excuse me for being scared of ruining the only good thing thatâs happened to me in years!â
You hit him with the cushionânot with enough force to make him hurt, but enough to make a point.
âDrop it, kid.â
âIâmââ you hit him again, ânotââ and again, âstupid. I know what Iâm getting myself into,â as you attempt to raise the cushion once more, Logan takes it from your hands, throwing it on the counter. Your shoulders sag, trying to find the strength to keep going. âAnd I know for a fact,â you add, glancing at his conflicted eyes, âthat the easiest thing for me would be to walk away from you, but I canât. Itâs too fucking late.â
âYou donât know what youâre saying.â
âI do! These are my feelings, okay? Mine, not yours. You donât have the right to decide who I love and who I donât.â
Loganâs eyes squint, scanning your face. âYouâre⊠obnoxious.â
âYeah, tell me something I donât know.â
âAnd IâI love you,â he confesses, his nostrils flaring with emotion. Opening your mouth to say something, you close it moments later, your gaze locked on his. âYou could take what you said, pretend as if I didnât exist, and I wouldnât say a thing, yâunderstand? I would move cities if you asked me, because I love you that fucking much, and I want you to be happy.â
You reach for his hand, briefly intertwining your fingers with his. Looking at him through your eyelashes, you rub your fingers over his stubble. âAnd what if my happiness comes from being with you?â
Logan lets out a harsh breath, his arm curling around your waist, pressing his chest to yours. âI canât promise Iâll be the perfect boyfriend. Iâll probably makeplenty of mistakes.â
âFine with me.â
âAnd youâll be mad at me. A lot.â
âDonât worry about that. Iâll make sure itâs mutual.â
Both of you laugh then, and youâre taken aback when he brushes his nose against your cheek, silently seeking permission to kiss you. His lips move hungrily against yours, trailing his hands down your spine, pulling you closer. He breaks the kiss and laughs at your eagerness when you chase after his mouth. You end up perched on his lap as he settles into one of your kitchen chairs. Logan stares into your eyes, his gaze drifting lower. âI wonât push you away this time. Not anymore.â
Thatâs your cue to finally do what youâve been yearning for weeks. You fall to your knees in front of him, shaky fingers that graze the hairs on his happy trail. The bulge in his sweatpants is close to your face, and your mouth waters at the thought of having him between your lips. âCan I?â you ask, your voice a touch higher.Â
He draws a long breath, tilting his head slightly. âYou may, baby.â
You pull at his sweatpants and boxers, sliding them down his legs just enough to free his hard cock. As you take a look at it, you find yourself at a loss for words, the sight overwhelming. Nothing couldâve prepared you for the first taste of his precum as you envelop his head between your lips, that musky scent of his hitting you.
A whimper escapes you, and Logan hisses when you run your tongue along the slit, his hands gripping the back of your neck tightly. âFuck, darlinâ. Thought about your mouth so many times, but never imagined itâd feel this good,â he cants his hips up, causing your movements to stutter. âYou can take a bit more, canât you?â his question ends with a guttural grunt, his fingers tightening on your hair. âGotta show me how much you want this.â
Logan takes all that you give him. You lower your head further, taking in another inch of him. Sexâs supposed to feel good, but this? It feels even greater. And heâs not even inside you yet, you hear a voice murmur in your head. The hand on your nape encourages you to move faster, and you sneak a hand between your bodies, grasping him by the base. You swallow around him, eyes fluttering open when he tugs sharply at your hair..
âThaaaatâs it, honey. Just like that, want you to choke on it,â he grumbles, running his mouth just the way you like. The tip of his cock nudges the back of your throat and tears fill your eyes. You pull away to catch your breath, still stroking him as you regain composure. Loganâs gaze is intense, and he stares into your soul, his chest heaving. âWhatâs wrong, sweetheart? Dick got your tongue?â
Youâll definitely get back to that joke later.
âWill youâcan youââ
âCome on, beautiful. I donât have all day.â
God, you love it when heâs mean.
âFuck my throat,â you plead, your voice barely above a whisper.
A smile dangles on the corner of his lips. âWe both know you can be nicer.â
The fucker makes your pulse race. âCan you fuck my throat?â you ask again, more insistently. âPlease.â
He guides himself into your mouth, smirking as he watches how your eyes roll back in pleasure. âHow polite of you to say please. Some good manners youâve got.â
You whimper around him, your body responding to the rhythm he sets, fully immersed in the intensity of the moment. And for a while, you drift away, losing your sanity with each thrust of his hips, every tug at your hair. Itâs almost impossible not to compare him to your past hookups. You try to recall at least a single instance when another man made you feel this way, but no memory surfaces.
Time seems to stretch and warp. You donât really know when it happensâhe pulls you off his cock, cradling your face, examining you. âYou fucking love that, donât you?â he asks with that sweet, syrupy voice, brushing away your tears. Thereâs no room left for embarrassment, so you nod, closing your mouth around his thumb. Defeated, Logan shakes his head, pressing his finger against your tongue. âI was planning on coming on your mouth, but I think Iâve got a better idea.â
In the blink of an eye, youâre in your bedroom. Not even a metaphorâhe picks you up and basically runs to your room, closing the door behind him. You prop yourself on your forearms, trying to process whatâs about to happen. Logan, already naked, climbs onto the bed after you, He kisses you slowly, tracing the curves of your body. âYou still want this?â
âI do. Iâm just⊠nervous, thatâs all,â you admit, flashing him a quick smile. âItâs been two years of celibacy for me. Will it fit?â you ask, glancing down at his cock, and Logan stares at you in confusion. âAlso, how many girlfriends have you had? Just curious.â
âI donât think this is the time for that conversation.â
âYouâre right,â you agree, lying back on the mattress, bracing yourself for whatâs to come. âWere they pretty?â
âBub.â
âYes?â
âShut up,â he replies with a smirk. âFocus on me, okay?â
Despite your tries to crack jokes at the worst possible moment, things escalate pretty quickly. Loganâs got three fingers inside you, pumping them in and out. Heâs already made you come once with his mouthâto get you more relaxed, he had said. Wanting sounds slip past your lips as he doesnât miss the chance to hit that spot that makes you squeeze your legs together. The tip of his nose drags long lines up and down the skin of your neck, mouthing at your jaw.
âIâm ready,â you mumble after some minutes, reaching for his cock and stroking him. âLetâs break the bed.â
âYouâre lucky youâre this cute,â he says, catching your lips in a kiss. âCondom?â
âNegative, Sergeant.â
âYou donât have any?â
You shake your head, biting the inside of your cheek. âI donât want you to use one.â
The way his gaze darkens doesnât go unnoticed by you. His hand guides your face toward his cock. âGet me wet,â he commands, and you oblige, sucking him into your mouth. You hum around him, unable to contain yourself, and you hear Logan chuckling above you. âCanât believe this is what it takes for you to shut up. Gotta keep your mouth full all the time.â
Once heâs satisfied with the way youâve slicked him, he positions himself over you, caging you between his arms. Logan pins you down with his body, his hot breath mingling with yours. When you stare into his eyes, all you see is pure love, and your heart swells with affection. âWill you fuck the bad jokes out of me?â
Logan laughs, rubbing his length along your folds, grazing your clit for a fleeting second. âI sure as hell will,â he assures you, lining himself up with your wet entrance. He looks into your eyes for approval. âReady?â
âI was born reaâ Fuck!â you nearly scream as his head breaches you, your eyes squeezing shut. Turns out his fingers werenât enough. âFucking mutant dick.â
âYouâll love it, believe me,â he husks next to your ear. His arms shake where they rest on each side of your head, seemingly as affected as you are. Logan pulls out, and then fucks into you with a little more force. âHow are you still so tight? Youâre killinâ me here.â
âIâve got no idea, but you feelâamazing,â you gasp, latching onto his back, holding him close to you. His thrusts gain strength, and suddenly heâs bottoming inside you. âOh, god. I can feel you in my stomach.â
âI know, baby, I know. Can feel it too,â he curls one of his hands around your throat, keeping you in place. From his position, he can watch the way your face contorts in pleasure. Lowering his head to envelop one of your nipples between his lips, he sucks hard. âYou were desperate enough to get on your knees in the damn kitchen. Youâll be good now too, am I right?â
âYes. Yes. I can be good,â you pant, eyes wide and pleading. âAnything you want. Just donât stop.â
âIâm not stoppinâ, princess. Donât worry,â his mouth curves into a wicked grin as he drives into you again, this time even deeper. His hand on your throat tightens slightly, just enough to make you feel the pressure, grounding you in the moment. âThatâs my girl,â he murmurs against your chest, his voice laden with need.Â
Each thrust has you gasping, your body arching off the bed to meet his. Loganâs grip on your neck loosens as his hand slides down to grasp your hip. He squeezes your tender flesh, pulling you harder against him, as if he canât get close enough. The bed creaks under the intensity, but you barely notice, too far lost in the rhythm of his movements.
âYouâre perfect, all Iâve ever wanted,â he slips his free hand between your bodies to find your clit, and the moment his fingers make contact with it, you canât help but whine. âSo fuckinâ perfect,â you hear him repeat, more to himself than to you, his voice stranded as he tries to hold himself back, letting you chase your own release first.
The pressure inside you builds up, tightening with every skilled flick of his fingers. Youâre sure you must look like a mess, sweaty and sticky, though the way he looks at you makes you forget everything else. âLogan, Iâmââ you croak, the wind being knocked out of your lungs with each relentless thrust. âI think Iâm gonna come.â
He picks up speed, snapping his hips faster. âIâve got you, let go for me. Iâll take care of you, baby, I swear,â his pace becomes erratic, digging his fingers into the softness of your thighs as the headboard keeps slamming against the wall. Your body obeys him, a shuddering release tearing through you, moaning Loganâs name and gripping him like a vice. âThatâs it, fuck, thatâs it,â he doesnât stop, driving you through your orgasm. His eyes snap to your face, contemplating how wrecked you look. âTell me whereâplease, sweetheart.â
âInside.â
âWhat?â
âI said inside. Come inside me, Logan.â
Heâs not strong enough to deny you such a thing. Logan buries himself to the hilt, groaning your name as his cock twitches and paints your walls with his thick seed. Beside your head, his claws unsheate, tearing into the pillow. He ruts against you, his body trembling and writhing against yours, already apologizing for the pillow incident while pressing his forehead to your shoulder. âSorry, Iâm sorry. That hasnât happened in a while.â
When Logan collapses beside you, he pulls you into his arms, kissing you eagerly. You return the kiss, wincing as you feel a bit of his cum slip out of you, rolling down your thighs. He stares at your glistening cunt without an ounce of remorse, and you close your legs. âThatâs private.â
âIt wasnât very private a minute ago.â
âLogan?â
âTell me, bub.â
âKnock, knock.â
He must truly love you, because he plays along: âWhoâs there?â
âIce cream.â
âIce cream who?â
âIce cream for you all night long.â
âGuess I didnât succeed in fuckinâ the bad jokes out of you,â he teases softly, letting his head fall back on the bed. âBut itâs fine. Iâll just have to keep tryinâ.â
This is the story of how you end up dating a man whoâs two hundred years old. But itâs also the story of how that same man learns to let his guard down and open his heart. So, remember this, kids: the skyâs the limit, especially when it comes to loveâand yes, even when it involves dating mutants.
dividers by: @/cafekitsune thank you!!! :)
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine x you#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett fic#logan howlett smut#logan howlett fanfiction#wolverine fic#wolverine fanfiction#wolverine smut#the wolverine#wolverine x men#x men movies#x men#smut#fluff#fan fiction#fic: give me the first taste#logan x reader#logan xmen#logan x you#james logan howlett#james howlett#x men wolverine#logan wolverine
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The Other Man H.S
Summary:Â Where y/n's husband opens up her marriage and she meets Harry on Tinder...
Warning: Smut, oral (f & m recieving), penetration, dirty talk (degradation & praise), spanking, squirting, I think that's it?
Word count:Â 13.5k+
Author's note: Hellooo long time no see! It feels like forever since I posted anything and I do apologise for that my brain was taking a hiatus apparently but hopefully I can get back into the groove! This probably needs editing but I hope you like it anywayy.
- Find my General Masterlist here -
âSo⊠do you do this a lot?â
âWhat do you mean?â You took a sip of your wine, trying to sate the erratic nerves jumping within the walls of your body. Not even a few drinks before you arrived to your date could save you.Â
âGo on Tinder dates.âÂ
Harry, the man who effortlessly charmed you when your friends encouraged you to swipe right on him seemed as relaxed as ever. He had this calm and sensual aura about him that existed through every little thing he did. His smile, the way he thanked the waitress, the way he greeted you with a kiss on the cheek and guided you to the table with a hand on the small of your back. Everything.Â
It was all a little too charming for your first date back in the game. Part of you even wished it would be a disaster. Then you reminded yourself that there had to be a first date. That you had to reclaim your desirability and get back into the dating scene to find yourself again. It had been three months after all, nearly four since your marriage blew up in your face and everything about your life changed.Â
You felt like you were ready. Or at least willing to give it a crack.
âYou seem a little nervous, thatâs why I ask. I didnât mean to offend you.â Harry spoke up again when you didnât answer right away.Â
âYou didnât offend me,â you assured, blushing at the way you got so caught up in the attraction of him, âbut is it really that obvious?â You shook your head, laughing softly like the idea of actually being on a date was unfathomable. It was. To you anyway; especially given the fact that the man sitting in front of you wasnât your husband. âThis is my first date in⊠a while.â
âItâs not obvious.â Harry laughed softly, running his hand through his hair. âBut itâs okay to be nervous. Iâm nervous too.â
âYou are?â Your eyes widened, âitâs not because Iâm married, is it? Because I put it in my profile and-â
âItâs not because youâre married,â He assured, interrupting your clear panic. He found it quite adorable actually. âItâs because I like you and I think youâre beautiful. I wouldnât be here if I thought otherwise.â
Oh.Â
Harry didnât want to overstep. He had only been chatting with you for a week before meeting in person, but he already liked you, at least from the few bits of information he learnt about you. And you were quite pretty, insanely pretty actually. Harry thought you were attractive from your profile, but seeing you in person only solidified that. It would take some serious differences between you two for him to not want to pursue things.
But this was a first date afterall and he wasnât going to put pressure on something so fresh. You were clear before even meeting him that you werenât looking for anything serious and Harry was happy with that. Whatever the outcome of this date, he at least wanted to make sure you had a good time. Even if it meant you two never saw each other again.
âOh.â You felt your heart hammering in your chest at the compliment. Even his eye contact was making you a jittery mess. Harry made you nervous. Giddy even and you had barely known the man a week. âThank you.â
Carson still complimented you, even still said he loved you, but nothing really felt the same after he wanted to open your marriage. It was like a wrecking ball to your life. Your heart broke instantly and your self esteem took the biggest hit you had ever experienced. Your own fucking husband asking to open your marriage after nearly three years of being married, six of being in a relationship. How were you supposed to take it?
He gave you those same reasons many guys give when they want to open a relationship; that you just didnât fulfill his needs sexually anymore and that he needed more to be satisfied. You tried to explain that youâd be willing to explore his fantasies if he just communicated them, especially since he had been the one leading a very vanilla (but good) sex life since you two got married, but he didnât like that idea.Â
You came to the conclusion there was someone else. Carson denied it and told you he still loved you, but you couldnât ignore the gut feeling that this was all some fucked up coverup to excuse cheating. So you said no. Safe to say that didnât work out because a divorce ultimatum and three months later and you were here, trying to reap the benefits from an open relationship you were too reluctant to explore.Â
Carson of course was happy to follow the rules you two set and be out nearly every damn night with someone, but you could never bring yourself to do it. You were still hung up on the hurt and pure embarassment you felt being forced to open a marriage you thought was happy. In the end you realised that you deserved the pleasure Carson was getting from someone else. You deserve to be desired and taken out on dates. It didnât seem fair that only one person was benefitting.
âYouâre welcome, love.â Harry smiled, âletâs just not put any pressure on it, okay? No expectations or anything. Weâll just get to know each other and see where the night takes us.â
You liked the sound of that. You liked the sound of him calling you âloveâ even more.Â
âOkay,â you nodded, âI like the idea of that.â
âGood.â Harry raised his wine glass in a toast and you couldnât help but feel a little mesmerised by the sight of his ringed fingers wrapped around the glass. Shaking yourself out of it, you raised yours as well. âTo us.â He offered.
âTo us.â
The date with Harry went far better than you ever couldâve expected. He was sweet and charming and all the things that drew you to him via text were even better in person. You two had far more in common than you realised and even the things you didnât only added so much interest to the conversation. He made you laugh harder than you had for months and was the perfect gentleman all night.Â
You two didnât sleep together, not that you went into this date wanting to sleep with him anyway because you werenât really sure what to expect, but you came out of it hoping heâd offer to walk you up to your hotel door and maybe continue walking you right to your bed. Harry didnât do that of course and instead offered you a kiss on your cheek and an invitation for dinner again next week, but that only made you want him more.
Leading up to the date was so overstimulating and so much all at once that you decided to book a room at the hotel in the same complex as your dinner (which he so kindly paid for), just so youâd have time in a clean environment to process your thoughts afterwards.Â
Carson was out with his girlfriend April tonight, as thatâs what she was to him now, so he wouldnât be home anyway. But you didnât want to be getting ready in your own room near the bed you and your husband shared, only to return to it after a date that couldâve been terrible. You wanted something just for you so no matter the outcome and no matter how you felt about it, you had somewhere free from any memories relating to your marriage.
When Harry offered the second date, you told him youâd think about it. He understood, took it like a great guy (the bare minimum, yes, but you were also expecting him to be too good to be true) then waited until you were in the closing doors of the elevator to say goodnight. It didnât take long after you were clean and in the comfort of a fresh Carson-free bed that you texted Harry to let him know how much you enjoyed the date and that you would like to join him for dinner next week.
He was nice and handsome and you had a really good time with him. The thought of seeing him again made you giddy and you wanted to hang onto that feeling.
Harry: Iâm glad it didnât take you too long to think about it. I had a wonderful night. X
You were practically giggling as you read the text, feeling like a little girl dating a cute guy she liked for the very first time. It was exhilarating. Only one date in and you already understood the appeal Carson was talking about, as much as you wanted to disagree with him.
You: Iâm glad. Goodnight Harry x
Harry: Goodnight, love. Sleep well x
//
âSo what did you get up to last night?â Carson asked, âyou have a nice night away?â
âI went on a date, actually.â Your back was facing towards him as you unpacked your overnight bag. Even though you couldnât see him, you could practically feel the surprise radiating off him.
âOh, really? With who?â Carson walked around until he was in your eyeline. He was trying not to act surprised, but you could see it even better with him in front of you that he was. His tone didnât come off judgemental though and if it did youâd have a few things you could throw back at him. He couldnât really say anything when you had remained silent on all his flings and relationships.Â
âHis nameâs Harry. I met him on tinder.â You shrugged, being honest but trying not to appear too excited about the whole thing. Carson didnât need to know you thought about Harry before you went to sleep, or that you spent a good half an hour on the phone with your friends squealing about your date with him.
âThatâs great.â Carsonâs reply seemed genuine and he held that kind smile that you fell in love with. âHow was it? Did he treat you right?â
âIt was really good, actually,â you paused your unpacking and looked at your husband, seeing the kindness in his eyes as he listened attentively to what you were saying. You wished heâd look like that all the time. âHe was the perfect gentleman and weâre going on another date next week.â
âHe mustâve really liked you then,â he teased.Â
Carson was just joking and being quite civil about the entire thing, but you still felt that churning in your stomach. It would never feel normal talking about a date with someone else, even if it was your date instead of his now.Â
âI guess so. It was only one date though.â
âDid you sleep together?â Then came the dreaded question.Â
You both agreed that you had to disclose when you slept with another person and a condom always had to be used. No details had to be shared and it was preferred that there werenât any, but for your own health and safety, you had to share it with each other. It only really mattered when you two were having sex with each other, which, with work and Carsonâs busy schedule with other people, only happened once a month if that on your scheduled weekend together.Â
Opening the marriage seemed to completely eradicate that part of your relationship and while you were unsatisfied, you couldnât really find it in yourself to try and change that. Not with Carson at least.Â
âNo. You know Iâd tell you if we did.â You didnât really want to talk about it anymore, not when this conversation was ruining your once-happy mood.
âI know,â Carson replied softly, moving forward to place his hands on your hips. âI love you, you know that. I hope you find some joy in Harry, or whoever. Whatever makes you happy, y/n. Thatâs all I want for you.â
That felt like the biggest load of shit ever but you chose not to say that.
So you smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck, trying to remember when you used to do it and not feel a sense of dread. âI love you too.â
//
You went on a few dates with Harry. You tried to plan things around when Carson was busy so you wouldnât be stuck at home thinking about what he was doing and that seemed to do the trick because you hadnât thought about him once on any of the dates you had with Harry.Â
Things had progressed to a goodbye kiss then a hello kiss when you decided to be a little brave and greet him with one when he picked you up one Saturday morning. And God Harry just knew how to kiss. Even a peck was delicious. His mouth was so soft and sweet and the way he held your face or your waist while kissing you made your entire body light on fire. The more time you spent with him, the more desperate you were becoming to sleep with him.
But Harry was such a gentleman. You didnât want anything serious and he knew that and yet he hadnât made the first move. Kissing you was as far as he got and when things started to get a little heated when you two said goodbye, it would always end far too prematurely for your liking.Â
In your head, a lot of men just wanted to have sex and most of the time did anything and everything to get there before moving on once their post-nut clarity hit. Thatâs kind of what you expected from Harry. Someone so good-looking and out of your league could find sex easily so you assumed heâd be eager to sleep with you. That was part of the allure, wasnât it? To sleep with a married woman? The nasty, scandalous thrill of being with someone that belonged to someone else.
Yet Harry never treated you like that, in fact, he didnât even bring up your marriage unless you started the conversation. Harry just treated you like someone genuinely interested in getting to know you.Â
âCan I ask you something?âÂ
It was only your third date. This conversation shouldâve come up earlier, maybe even on one of the many text conversations or calls you had, but you were a little caught up in his charm and romance to think about it then and you wanted to see his reaction in person. In the very beginning you werenât even sure if youâd be seeing him again but now that you were up to date three and he just never brought up the fact that you were married⊠well you wanted to know why. He knew your marriage was open but you didnât quite understand why was he okay with it? There had to be a reason, right?Â
âOf course you can.â He leaned back against the chair and tucked his elbow on the edge of the balcony you two were sitting at. It was a picturesque little cafe overlooking a river and it truly felt like you two were on some romantic holiday. The sun was gorgeous even despite the cold breeze and Harry looked effortlessly handsome.Â
âWhy do you⊠I donât know how to put it.â You sat a bit straighter in your chair, fiddling with the rings on your fingers. Your wedding ring. You werenât sure why you still wore it on your dates with Harry, but it was a habit and you were married. âYou never bring up Carson or the fact that Iâm married and I want to know whyâŠâ
âWhy I donât care?â He asked, finishing off your sentence.Â
âYeahâŠâ You nodded, âI guess I just donât get it. Youâre a lot younger than me-â
âIâm 27 and itâs only five years.â He corrected, looking quite amused by your comment. Five years was a big gap when he was younger than you, at least you thought so.Â
âStill.â You pressed, âYouâre young and Iâm married. I just donât understand why youâre choosing to go out with me and not someone else. And the fact that youâre okay with my marriage it just⊠I donât know.â You looked away for a moment, needing to break free from his eye contact so you werenât completely swept up in it. âIâm not sure if Iâd be the same. Iâm not the same and Iâm the one whoâs married.â
âIâve been married beforeâŠâÂ
Well, you certainly didnât expect that.
âWhat?â Your eyes widened and Harry nearly laughed at how shocked you were.
âI was only 20 at the time and it was stupid to say the least but we were happy and in love and marriage seemed like the answer to all our problems.â He smiled at the memory, tracing his finger around the rim of his water glass as he thought back to that time in his life.Â
âAnd it wasnât?â
âNo.â He chuckled, sighing while running a hand through his hair. âMarriage caused more problems than it was worth. Steph and I were broke and both in school. We could barely afford our degrees let alone rent and it just caused so many arguments. Too many arguments. We still loved each other and we made it work but over time⊠the love faded.â Harry shrugged. This felt like too intense of a conversation for breakfast, but you werenât really expecting to find out about a marriage.Â
âWowâŠâ You breathed. âIâm sorry. Um, how long were you two married?â
âThree years. We were just too young and going through too many changes. In the end, we were more like roommates than husband and wife. Didnât have sex for the last six months because we were too busy working and emotionally disconnecting from each other.â He looked out to the water, turning back to finish off his point. âAnyway. What Iâm trying to say is that shit happens. Relationships arenât clear-cut. I can tell youâre not just trying to get some exciting thrill by cheating on your husband so as far as Iâm concerned itâs just you and me.â Harry bumped his foot against yours under the table, smirking ever so slightly. âIf that changes Iâm sure youâll let me know.â
Harry spoke about it in such a respectful way. You imagined it was far messier than he made it out to be, but he didnât blame Steph or attack her character to make himself the good guy in all of it. It was refreshing and mature. Was it bad that him being married before only made him more attractive?
Maybe it was because you now knew that he understood you.Â
âThatâs a very⊠refreshing outlook, Harry.â
âRefreshing?â He chuckled, âNo. Realistic.â He leaned forward and clasped his hands on the table, nudging your foot again. âAnd to answer your other question, the reason Iâm out with you and not âsomebody elseâ is because I like you. I told you that on our very first date and Iâll say it again. I like you. Simple.â
âYou act like things are so easy.â You laughed, blushing at his honesty.Â
âThey can be.â He reached for your hand, threading your fingers together before squeezing. âIt feels easy with you.â
Yeah⊠it did.Â
To make things worse⊠or better? his admission only made you more insatiable for him. Nothing he said was remotely casual, but it had also been a long time since you were dating. Aside from Carson, only one other man had touched you, so you didnât really have a good gauge on navigating new beginnings or sex with a new person. You knew how to please a man but all your skills were honed in on one man.Â
So when Harry offered to host dinner at his house for your next date, your stomach was a mixture of nerves and pure excitement. You hadnât been there before, but with his invitation to stay the night, you didnât really care what his place looked like, just that he had a nice clean bed to fuck you on.Â
You never thought youâd be in this position, but you also never thought youâd be in an open marriage with a man you imagined building a family with. You didnât see that happening now, but what you did see was you enjoying yourself and getting to explore another man for the first time in years.
Harry wouldnât have just invited you to spend the night if he wasnât interested in sleeping with you. He didnât fit into the dump-and-run stereotype you created in your head, but he sure as hell wasnât uninterested in sex. He practically oozed it from his fucking pores.Â
âY/n!â Harry beamed, opening the door with a big charming grin. He looked gorgeous and you were taken aback at just how good-looking he was. He told you to dress casually and while he matched the criteria with a pair of jeans and a loose white button-up, he looked anything but casual.Â
âHi,â you smiled, stepping inside. You barely made it into the doorway before he grabbed your overnight back from your shoulder, slung it on his and then cupped your face to bring you in for a kiss. You gasped a little into his mouth, humming when you relaxed into it and grabbed onto the sides of his mouth to reciprocate.Â
It felt so young kissing like this; languid and passionately right in the open doorway of his house where anyone who drove or walked past could see. But you didnât really care who saw when he was nudging you against the doorway and crowding you with his body. It wasnât an innocent kiss thatâs for sure.Â
His mouth moved expertly against yours, tongue sliding against the seam of your mouth until it was brushing against yours. He grabbed onto your waist, pulling you flush against him until he was consuming every part of you. It was delirious the way he sucked on your tongue and groaned at the taste of your mouth.Â
If this was setting the tone for the evening, you could barely wait.Â
âDid you miss me or something?â You joked, breathing heavily as the kiss broke.Â
He smiled, nodding while running his thumb over your mouth. He dragged his eyes over your body, taking in your nice fitting jeans and top with the most perfect amount of cleavage he could die. You were radiant. âVery much so.âÂ
God.
âCome in, love. Itâs cold out.â Harry stepped out of the way properly this time, closing the door behind you while you looked around his entranceway.Â
âShoes off?â
âIf you donât mind.â
âOf course.âÂ
Harry walked you straight through to his living area. It was a warm, inviting home with soft lighting and lots of texture. He had a musical influence throughout but in the most tasteful way ever. Posters, vinyls and a gorgeous record player front and centre in his living room. His style was envying and you wished Carson would let you do even half the things Harry had done to his house.Â
You could see yourself being very comfortable here.Â
âYour house is gorgeous, Harry.â You complimented, looking around the space in awe.Â
âThank you.â He gushed, setting your bag down on one of his armchairs before walking into the kitchen. âI originally hired an interior designer then ended up picking all her opposite choices. I think I did an okay job.â
âI think so.â You agreed, following him to the island bench. The entire house was fragrant. It was a mixture of some citrusy candle, whatever delicious dish was in the oven and his cologne. It was intoxicating. âUgh and it smells so good in here. What is that?â you practically moaned.
âAlfredo chicken pasta.â Harry mused, grabbing a bottle of red from his wine fridge. âI know you like it. Thought I should try and impress you for our first at home date.â
âSo far itâs working. Just need to wait until itâs in my mouth for the final verdict.â You replied, pressing your hip to the bench while looking at him. âCanât give you a raving review before Iâve tried it, can I?â
If Harry set the tone with the kiss, you set the tone with your words and those flirty eyes of yours. He pressed his tongue into his cheek, nearly audibly moaning at the double entendre. Harry had been holding back on how badly he wanted you since the first date.Â
There was an instant fire between you. Chemistry he had been wanting to act upon for weeks. But he knew this was the first relationship for you since your husband suggested opening your marriage and he didnât want to push things. You two spoke about it extensively after the third date when you wanted to clear the air to figure out what Harry got from this.Â
Harry got pure pleasure. To him it was simple. He enjoyed your company and you seemed genuine in what you told him about your situation, so why wouldnât he pursue things with you?
âYouâre a smart woman.â Harry smirked, pouring the red wine into both wine glasses he had set on the bench before your arrival. âActions speak louder than words, donât they?â The way he looked at you nearly had you sweating.Â
âItâs an age-old saying, after all.â You mused, thanking him once he passed you a glass. âTo us?â
âTo our first night together.â He clinked his glass against yours, eliciting a smile that had you trying to hide how nervous he truly made you feel. It had been a while since you got butterflies in the presence of a man.Â
âNow, tell me all about your day. Mustâve been pretty relaxing if you had so much time to get all pretty for me.â He teased, reaching out to pluck at the hem of your shirt.Â
âYeah right.â You snorted, jumping straight into all the problems you encountered during your work day.Â
Dinner went perfect as it usually did. You both laughed and drank and shared a delicious meal. By the time dessert came, Harry had moved from his chair opposite you to sit right beside you, deciding to play a game with the few mini dishes he made. He didnât really explain why he chose to make multiple options, only that you had to guess what each one is.Â
You werenât really going to stop him from feeding you, were you?Â
âOkay keep your eyes closed.â He prompted, walking over to the table with the long plate housing the mini desserts.Â
âOkay! Okay theyâre closed.â You shuffled in your chair, trying not to sneak a peek even if you wanted to.Â
âKeep them closed.â He warned again, his arm brushing yours as he set the plate onto the table.Â
âThey are.â You defended.Â
âHow many fingers?â Harry sat right next to you, waving two fingers in front of your face.Â
âHarry!â
âOkay.â He laughed. Harry grabbed one of the dessert spoons and took a small chunk from the first dessert before bringing it close to your face. âAny guesses?â
âSmells warm.â You guessed, breathing in the delicious cinnamon-or was it caramel? âCaramel?â
âVery good, Angel.â He praised, unintentionally making your breath hitch. That little bit of praise hit you right in the belly, making a swarm of butterflies flutter all over. âOpen your mouth.â
Shit. If only he was asking you to open your mouth for something else.Â
You did as instructed and widened your mouth, rubbing your palms up and down your thighs. He brought the spoon to your mouth, letting you suck it clean before removing it. âDo you have a guess?â
âMmh.â You hummed softly, savoring the taste of the dessert you had on your first date. âSticky date pudding?â
âAtta girl!â He cheered. âWell done.â
If he praised you one more time⊠god you almost felt pathetic at how turned on you were getting. And over food.Â
âCan I open my eyes now?â You whispered, wanting to look at him.Â
âNope. Next one.â He took a spoon from the next dessert and repeated the same movements, holding it in front of your nose so you could smell it first. âWhat can you smell?â
âCustard maybe? Vanilla?âÂ
âYeah⊠on the right track.â He mused, âopen up.â Then once again he fed you the spoon.Â
âOh thatâs so good.â You practically moaned, feeling his thumb brush against your mouth to wipe away a bit of custard. He sucked his thumb clean of it, watching you enjoy the dessert. Your moans of appreciation were hitting him harder than he thought they would but he just couldnât help himself. You were moaning over something he made. He could only imagine what youâd sound like moaning over his cock or his mouth. âIs it⊠like a custard croissant cake or pudding? Whatever you call it.â
âYou know your desserts. Iâm impressed.â
âWe had it on our second date, Harry.â And thatâs when it clicked. âAre these desserts weâve had on our dates?âÂ
âMaybe. Depends if you can guess the last one. Now open up pretty girl.â At his last instruction you opened your mouth and your eyes at the same time, looking right at him. âHeyy. Thatâs cheating.â He complained, feeding it to you.Â
There was something erotic about the way you sucked that spoon clean, even going as far as plucking it from Harryâs fingers so you could get all the chocolate from it. âI knew it was chocolate pudding before you even fed it to me.â You whispered, looking down at the nicely plated dish. âDid you really make dishes weâve had on our dates?â
âMaybe.â He repeated, scanning his eyes along your side profile. âToo much?â
No. Fuck, you were about ready to jump his bones.Â
âNo.â You shook your head and set the spoon down. âThis is⊠this is really thoughtful. Thank you.â
It was romantic. Everything about this date was romantic.Â
âYouâre welcome.â Harry murmured, eyes flickering down to your mouth. A playful smile emerged on his mouth and you could just tell something was up.Â
âWhat?â You chuckled.Â
âYouâve got something here.â He reached out to cup your face, swiping your mouth clean like he did before. âSee? Mustâve liked the chocolate pudding.âÂ
Before he had a chance to lick it clean himself, you grabbed his hand and brought his thumb to your mouth. His lips parted and his eyes darkened as he watched you wrap your lips around it, sucking on it gently.Â
âItâs goodâŠâ you whispered, eyes fluttering when he cupped your jaw. The heat rising in the room was almost unbearable. Every second felt like an hour, every flick of his eyes between your own and your mouth like a century. The touch of his pinky grazing your neck had you shivering and all you wanted-no, craved was his mouth on yours. You bit your lip, releasing it with a pop before breathing out a soft laugh. âSo are you going to kiss me or-â
You couldnât say another word because Harry had already slid his hand back to thread through your hair and pulled you right in for a kiss. You whimpered as your lips met in a soft kiss. It started gently, but as the seconds went by and your hands ended up in his hair, it was getting hot and heavy.Â
âHarryâŠâ you sighed, breaking when you needed to breathe.Â
âGod I love kissing you.â He murmured, tipping your head back so he could kiss along your jaw towards your neck.Â
âIâŠâ you swallowed thickly while rubbing your hands down his neck towards his shirt buttons. You were desperate to see more of his skin. To feel more of it. âI want you.â
Harry paused, breathing heavily while pulling back to look at you. His lips were already swollen; all pink and yummy looking and his eyes had this dark look in them. It was a look you were sure you had given him countless times. When your heavy kisses got cut short or when you were forced to say goodnight when you really wanted to invite him in. You were sure you were giving it to him now.Â
âI want you. Really fucking bad.â He admitted, reaching to push your hair back from your face. âI just donât want to rush you, baby. I didnât invite you over expecting anything and-shit.â Harryâs eyes widened as you bit the bullet and ripped your shirt off before putting it down on your lap.Â
You were everything he imagined youâd be. No. You were better. Gorgeous in every way and in one of the prettiest bras he had ever seen. You couldâve worn anything though and he still wouldâve thought that. But Jesus. Â
âYouâre not rushing me.â You whispered, âbut I am wearing matching underwear so you can rush that if you want toâŠâ
Harry swooped in again, holding your face in both hands to kiss you. âI want to.â He practically moaned, âbut Iâm not rushing anything with you. Iâve wanted to do this for a long time.â
âGood.â You smiled softly, sliding your palms over his chest before undoing the top button. âGood.â You barely whispered the word before kissing him again.Â
Harry pulled you closer by your hips, nudging your shirt to the ground so your legs thread into each other. He ran his hands over your torso, your waist and your arms while you worked on unbuttoning his shirt. His skin was warm and soft and you were addicted to the feeling of his chest hairs against your hands.Â
He undid your pants, draping the zipper down before making the executive decision to stand up and force you up as well with his hands on your hips. Your pants and top fell to the floor with ease and he was quick to push the dessert plate and cutlery out of the way so he could pick you up and set you on the edge of the table.Â
He was obsessed with how your body felt in his hands and under his lips and he wanted to explore every inch of you. He let his mouth trail along your collarbones and neck, down to the clevage spilling from your bra. You were so soft and sweet, so plush in his hands. Harry never wanted this to end and it had barely started. He hadnât even tasted you yetâŠ
âYouâre so goddamn beautiful, y/n.â Harry breathed, taking a moment to just look at you. He reached in to kiss you gently while massaging your thighs, sliding his fingers so close to the edge of your underwear without brushing them at all. âCan I touch you?âÂ
âYes.â You nodded eagerly, fiddling with the hair at the nape of his neck. That was when you caught sight of the twinking diamond on your ring finger. The reminder that despite all verbal permission given by your husband as per your arrangement, you were still going to sleep with another man while married. âCan I ask a favour, though. Before we⊠do anything?â
âOf course.â He urged, eyes softening. âAnything. What is it?â
His gaze was so soft⊠so endearing. Harry showed more care for what you were saying than your husband did in the months he was off dating other people. Probably for months before that too.Â
You breathed out heavily, heart thumping in your ears as you pulled your ring finger off and played with it in your hands. âWill you put this in your pocket? I donât want it on for this. I just want it to be you and me.â
âIâll keep it safe.â Harry promised, holding his palm flat for you to put the ring on. âEven if you wore it, it would still be you and me, y/n.â He assured, sliding the ring into the tiny pocket at the front of his jeans.Â
âIt wouldnât.â You whispered, smiling softly while reaching forward to kiss him again. âIt is now, though.â
Harry moaned into the kiss, pulling you closer to him so he had better access to you. Then he went back to just touching you. Caressing you. He palmed at your breasts and your thighs and your belly⊠everywhere he could.Â
Carson knew how to make you cum, but Harry didnât and that was almost better. He didnât skip through to the end, to what he knew would work. No, Harry took his sweet time running his hands and his mouth over your body, trying to figure out what you liked best. He wanted to memorise the little jerks or squeezes of your thighs the prettiest soft whimpers if he touched you just so.Â
Harry loved the first time he slept with someone knew. It was a new experience and an entirely new set of likes and dislikes for him to explore. And after you dressed up so nice for him and wore what wouldâve had to be the sexiest lingerie he had ever seen, Harry couldnât have been more excited. He had been waiting for this since the moment he met you face to face.Â
âWhat do you like?â Harry breathed, smoothing his hands over your stomach up towards your breasts. They slipped under the cups of your bra to push it above your nipples so he could pinch them in both hands. âTell me. Please.â He was almost desperate, needing to know how he could please you.
âI like what youâre doing now. I likeâŠâ You swallowed, whimpering ever so slightly when he pinched your right nipple a little harder, âI like when you look at meâŠâ
âWhat else?â Harry murmured, keeping his eyes laced with yours as he dipped down to tug at your nipple with his teeth instead. He soothed the ache with his tongue; all hot and slick. All you could think about was his tongue being somewhere else. Getting head was a rare commodity in your house. Carson was quite decent at it, actually, but it was one of those things where it took forever for you to cum. You both worked demanding jobs so when you got time or needed release, it was usually something quick to get the job done.Â
But god, youâd kill to be eaten out.Â
âFuckâŠâ you gasped, running a hand through his soft hair. While you were nervous about sleeping with a new man, there was one thing marriage life did prepare you for; saying what you wanted. You had no problems telling Harry exactly what you liked. âI like dirty talk too. I like to be praisedâŠâ you had to pause when he sucked on your nipple again, releasing it with a pop that had you shivering when the air hit the wetness left behind by his tongue. âDegraded tooâŠâ
âYeah?â Harry cocked his head, smirking like you just unlocked something evil in him. âAnything you donât like to be called?â
âStupid. I donât like being called a bitch, either.âÂ
âWouldnât dream of it, pretty girl,â Harry assured, tucking his fingers into the waistband of your pretty underwear and sliding them side to side against your skin. Harry wouldâve loved to get you completely bare for him, but there was something so sexy about fucking you while you were wearing the lingerie. You wore it for a reason, it would be a shame to let it lay on the floor for the entire night, especially when you looked so fucking good at it. âTell me more. I want to know what I can do to you.â
âItâs too easy if I give you all the answers, Harry. Iâll tell you if I donât like something.â You teased, sitting up from the table so you could run your palms all over his chest and up to around his neck.
He was just glorious. All tanned and muscular with littered hairs that made him look so much more manly. You could only imagine what his pecs would look like all sweaty while he fucked you. You hoped heâd hover over your head so you could lick at his chest and tug at that sinful cross necklace between your teeth.Â
âCan I tell you what I want to do?â He proposed, hooking one finger on the underside of your underwear this time, moving it towards your mound but not down enough to feel how wet you had grown for him. He was so close to dipping his fingers into your crease. So close to being able to please you.Â
âPleaseâŠâ You breathed, eager and so damn desperate for anything.
âI want to fuck you while youâre wearing this,â he snapped at the fabric, maintaining direct eye contact with you. Oh, Jesus. Between his eye contact and his sultry tone, you were going dizzy at how direct he was being. You loved it. âThen I want to strip you naked and watch you bounce on my cock. Forwards⊠backwards.â He groaned at the thought and grabbed onto your ass, firmly pulling you closer to the edge of the dining table until his lips brushed with yours. You could feel the hard length of his cock press against your pussy, promising you that it would be deep inside you by the end of the night.
âI want to make your ass red so when you go home to your husband, heâll know I fucked you better than he ever could.âÂ
It was another promise, that Harry would indeed fuck you better than Carson ever could.Â
âBut firstâŠâ Harry bucked his hips against yours, keeping his grip on your hips tight so you couldnât wiggle away at his directed grinds over your clit. He kissed you gingerly, watching your eyes haze over as you whimpered softly. Between his cock and his words, your head was spinning. âI need to taste you. Iâve thought about nothing else but having my face between your thighs for weeks now.â
Harry grabbed your hands from behind his neck and pressed them down to the table on either side of your hips, bumping his nose with yours. âDo you like the idea of any of that, darling?â
You nodded eagerly, loving the sound of all of it. âUhuh. All of itâŠâ you inhaled a sharp breath, loving the feeling of his hands moving to knead at your inner thighs, âThere is one thing though. Something I want.â
âTell me.â He murmured, eyes wide and eager. He just couldnât keep his hands off you. He was grabbing your thighs and your hips, craving the warmth of your body.Â
âI want your cock in my mouth. Iâve been thinking about that since our first date.â
Harry smirked and you could feel the way his cock jerked right against you. It was big. You wanted to choke on it.Â
âThat can be arranged.âÂ
He reached in to kiss you again, groaning like a starved man while wrapping his palm around the back of your neck to guide you back down against the table. When you were flat he stood back up and stripped his shirt off fully, leaving him completely shirtless.Â
Then he did something unexpected. With a shit-eating grin on his face he pulled up the chair he kicked away earlier and sat on it, shuffling close to the table like he was getting ready to eat a three-course meal. You were going to make fun of him for it, but you didnât really get a chance when he slung your legs over his shoulder and nuzzled his nose right into the crotch of your underwear.Â
âJesus.â He moaned, eyes fluttering closed. Your jaw went completely slack at what you were witnessing. Never had a man looked so fucking hungry to eat you out. He was practically delirious and all he had done was inhale how sweet you were. Harry was looking forward to having your scent all over him. âYou smell so fucking good, y/n.â He looked up at you again, hooking the very tip of his finger into the crotch of your underwear and sliding it up and down along your crease. âBut do you taste as good as you smell?â
You nearly whined like some pathetic puppy, but you had to keep that inside as you didnât want to appear too eager. Too easy. Truthfully, you were easy though. Harry was able to turn you on easier and quicker than you ever thought. And all over a little dirty talk and a slight obsession with eating you out.Â
âWhy donât you find out?â You hiked yourself up on your elbows, bringing your feet off his shoulders and onto the edge of the table so you were spread wider for him.Â
âOh I will,â he pulled your underwear to the side, breath hitching at the first sight of your bare pussy. âYouâre so gorgeous, y/n. Iâve been looking forward to this for a long⊠long time.â
When his mouth finally grazed your clit, you fell back against the table. You couldnât hold yourself up even if you wanted to, not when he started eating you out like a damn starved animal. Harry moaned like you were the best thing he ever tasted and touched everywhere. He wasnât clit happy or labia happy and he certainly didnât miss-interpret one part of your anatomy for another.
âFuck Harry⊠oh God.â You whined, pulling at his hair with both hands before suddenly letting go because you hadnât asked if you could. You didnât even know if he liked it. âDo you-â You could barely breathe let alone talk. âCan I pull your hair? Is it okay?â
âGod, yes. As hard as you want,â Harry moaned like the idea of his hair being pulled was orgasmic. âDonât stop, y/n. I promise.â He grabbed your hand and guided it back to his hair, giving you a reassuring nod before going back to your clit.Â
Harry knew exactly what he was doing. How to tease, how to take advantage of your entire body to make you feel good. He kissed and nipped over your thighs and used his hands to squeeze your breasts and play with your nipples. It was all so wet and sloppy and you felt like your entire body was on fire.Â
âGod you taste⊠shit-â Harry broke for air, spitting directly over your pussy then spreading it around with two fingers, âyou taste so fucking good, y/n.â He used one of those wet fingers and slid it inside you, pumping it a few times while slurping against your clit again. âNever thought a pussy could be so sweet⊠âm addicted.âÂ
He slid his second finger in easily, fucking you with both digits so good your arousal was echoing around the room. His high ceilings did wonders of making sound travel. Even with all the rugs and soft furnishing, the softest moan sounded so much louder. And you were anything but soft. Your noises were loud and unforgiving and every single one of them was going straight to his cock.
It also meant you heard every groan Harry made. Every single sound of pleasure he was feeling just eating you out. It was possibly one of the sexiest things you had ever experienced. A man with his head buried between your thighs moaning and being so fucking enthusiastic because he gained genuine pleasure out of it. He liked it. Harry ate you out like it was his favourite thing on planet earth.Â
âYou okay? You good?â He checked in on you, looking up at your gaped mouth and thrown-back head. You only moaned in response so Harry reached for your hand and threaded your fingers, squeezing them to get your attention. âHey. Look at me.â He nudged, not happy with your lack of response.
You forced yourself to look down at him, nearly shaking at how intense his eye contact was. His (now) three fingers were still steadily fucking into you, but he had taken a much-needed break from using his mouth to check on you. âGood?â
âYes. So so good. So good.â You nodded eagerly, trying to guide his face back to you with the hand still in his hair. âJust-please. I need it.â
âYou need it?â He grinned, cocking his head ever so slightly. âIs it that good, baby? Do I suck your pretty clit so good that you need it?â
âYes... Oh yes...â
âI need it too.â He admitted, dipping back in to swirl his tongue around his fingers, right where your poor needy hole was dripping with arousal. âYou just taste so fucking good, y/n. Iâd have you on my face every night if I could.â
You seemed to like that idea because he could feel you clench around his fingers, knees bumping into each other so his face was wedged between your thighs. Your underwear were a complete mess too; all soaked and creamy. Harry wanted to wring them with his teeth and suck them dry, but with the real thing pressed right against his nose, he didnât have to.Â
âBet youâd like that, wouldnât you? Letting me eat your cunt every night? Every morning, even? Would you let me wake you up with my head between your thighs? Let me eat you for a midnight snack. Because I would.â Harry moaned as he wedged his mouth over your clit again, kissing and licking at it, spitting at it so it was even wetter. You were practically a sobbing mess above him too and that only encouraged him to say whatever he wanted.
âY/n, Iâd worship you and this pretty pussy.âÂ
He slid his fingers out just long enough to smack them against your clit. It was gentle at first and he quickly soothed the sharp sting with his tongue. But he felt the way you jerked around his head, how your hips lifted off the table to get more.Â
âIs it okay?â He breathed, looking up for an answer. This time, you were already looking right at him. You had been from the moment he left your aching cunt empty and needy because you wanted to see what heâd do. And what a sight. You were sure youâd never forget the image of him smacking your clit then making out with it like a starved man. It was ridiculous.Â
Harry Stylesâ mouth would kill you one day. You knew it would.Â
âMore than okay.â You nodded, bringing your intertwined fingers up to your breast so his large hand would squeeze against your nipple. âDo it again.â
He followed your request quickly and spanked over your pussy again, this time a little harder and with more surface area of his fingers. You gasped out a moan, back lurching off the table as they hit your swollen clit. He quickly soothed the burn with his tongue, this time blowing on your sensitive skin for a moment before languidly tracing swirls over your clit.
âAgain. Harder.â You gurgled out, clenching your fist into his hair when he smacked your clit again. Harder. He slid those three fingers right back into you again, curling and fucking them roughly right against your g-spot. âOh God⊠Harry!â
âOh, youâre such a good little slut letting me spank you like this. Right over your little clit too, hm? Who knew such a pretty girl would like such dirty things.â
The dirty talk⊠you were going to pass out.
âYouâre taking it so well, y/nâ He cooed, pulling his fingers out to spank you again before they returned deep into your pussy. It was dizzying. The way he spanked you then fucked you then spanked you again like some quick endless loop. He was careful not to hit you too many times, but whatever he was doing was making you reach your orgasm faster than any other oral you had received.Â
ââM gonna cum, Harry. Please justâŠâ You pulled his face back to your clit, urging him closer with your hand.
Harry didnât argue and did what you seemed to like the most; those three fingers stroking right against your g-spot, one hand on your breast and his mouth sucking right over your clit. It seemed to do the trick too because not even ten seconds later, you were practically lurching off the table while crying out his name through a squirting orgasm. Your hand cemented him to your pussy so he could happily collect as much of your release right in his mouth.Â
When you started to calm down, Harry softened his movements and pulled his fingers out of you. He licked them clean then pressed soft kisses all over your thighs and mound, even right on either side of your clit.
âYouâre such a good girl, darling. Did so well for me.â Harry praised, squeezing your hand and keeping his eyes on your face as you panted and looked up at the ceiling.Â
âGod that wasâŠâ You swallowed thickly, pushing your sweaty hair from your forehead so you could look down at him.Â
âWhat?â He nudged, smirking while kissing your inner thigh. âGood? Is that the word youâre looking for?â
âYour egoâs too big for your own good.â You laughed softly, sitting up so you could guide his mouth to yours. Harry was still smiling into the kiss until he relaxed into it. Thatâs when it turned heated again. The taste of your pussy and his mouth; your mouth too⊠it was all too much. âBut yeahâŠâ you sighed, âit was good.â
He stood up from his chair so you werenât hunched down to kiss him and the moment you had access to his jeans, you started working on undoing them. Harry hissed into the kiss when you applied pressure to his hard bulge and he had to break free just to breathe at how sensitive he was. His cock felt harder than ever before. He didnât think he had ever been this turned on and sore in his entire life.
This chemistry with you⊠it was otherworldly. Supernatural almost. A compelling pull like his cells were trying to fuse with yours.Â
And you were married. He had to push that thought out of his head because only a few weeks into this and he was already considering asking you to leave your husband.Â
âI need you, baby.â He panted, grabbing your hips tightly as you pushed his jeans and boxers down his thighs to free his cock. âShit-â
You wrapped your hand around his cock while he helped you get them off the rest of the way. You couldnât help but look down between you, needing to see how pretty he was. And pretty he was. Long and decently thick, so heavy in your hand. You knew heâd fill you up so good heâd have you seeing stars. Two fingers were usually enough to prep you for sex, sometimes even one depending on how turned on you were.
You were glad he chose three.
âYour cock is so pretty, Harry.â You complimented, squeezing your palm around him. Your eyes filtered between your working hand and his face, obsessed with how hooded his eyes became just from your hand. âSo big too⊠I need you inside me. âM so empty.â
Harry didnât quite realise when you said you liked dirty talk that you liked it both ways, but he rather enjoyed the filth spilling from your mouth. He found it cute that you could barely string words together when he was pleasuring you, but like this? It was the biggest fucking turn-on.
âBend me over the tableâŠâ You begged softly, nipping at his jaw until you reached the shell of his ear. His cock was oozing precum down over your hand. He liked what you were saying. âPlease. Make me squirt againâŠâ
âCome here.â
Harry pulled you off the table and with a rough hand, spun you around to bend you over the table. You squealed as he spanked your ass without thought, spreading your cheeks wide to spit down over you. He planned to fulfil his promise of fucking you with this lingerie on and now that he was looking at your pretty holes bent over with the tiny string of lace tucked to the side⊠he couldnât have been more excited.
âYouâre just so hot, y/n.â Harry groaned, spanking your other cheek just to watch your ass jiggle. âSo goddamn hot.â
âIâm hotter with a cock in me.âÂ
Your mouth earned you another spank, this time directly over your sensitive cunt. You squealed and jumped in place, but Harry easily soothed the ache with a friendly grind of his cock against your clit. Your knees buckled at the direct stimulation but Harry made sure you kept still by pressing his hand to your lower back.
âI need to get a condom,â he murmured to himself, suddenly remembering the dreaded protection right when his cock was so close to being inside you.Â
âHurry.â You gasped, forehead pressed to the table.Â
âI will. I will.â
Harry fished the condom from his jeans pocket, placed there earlier in the evening in hopes of sleeping with you tonight. It was a just-in-case for something spur of the moment, though he didnât start the night plotting a way to get you in his bed. He was glad now that he put that condom in there just in case, especially when you were waiting for him.Â
Once the condom was on, he was right back in position. A hand on the small of your back and the other guiding the head of his cock to your entrance. Harry didnât wait or tease, he just pressed right into you slowly and deliberately.Â
âShit-â
âOh godddâŠâ
Your curses echoed at the same time, both as desperate as each other. Harry just stretched you so perfectly, on the cusp of too much and the best type of full possible. It helped that you were so damn wet, so turned on that he was easily able to push inside you.Â
âGod, baby. You're so tight.â Harry hissed, reaching forward to press a kiss to the middle of your back. You couldnât even respond to his compliment when your body was still getting accustomed to a new man. A new cock. All you could do was moan and claw at the table, clenching around him. âHey. You okay?â Harry checked, sweeping your hair back so he could see your face.
âUhuh. Just⊠shit.â You whimpered, squeezing around him again. He cursed at how tight you were and collected your hair in a loose hold around his fist.Â
âYâsure?â He mused, pressing a kiss right in between your shoulder blades. âYouâre trembling beneath me, darling.â
âFuck me.â You begged. He was so deep in your belly and it was torturous having him so far inside you and not moving at all. âPlease Harry just-â
He didnât need to be convinced any further. Not with how sweet you sounded and how wet you were around him. You were a fucking dream and that only became more apparent as Harry started thrusting into you. He started with a slow but steady grind, fucking you with hard pressure like he was trying to memorise every inch of your pussy.Â
âGod baby. You feel so good.â Harry moaned, building up the speed with a good grip on your hips. He hooked his thumb into the small lace string of your underwear, pulling it to the side so he could watch his cock disappear into your wet cunt. And you were so wet. Your arousal coating his length and turning creamy the longer he fucked you. It was obscene.Â
Mostly though, he was watching your face. Your cheek pressed to the table, mouth gaped open and eyes screwed shut as you moaned the-fuck the prettiest noises he had ever heard. He had barely shown you his best tricks and you were a mess beneath him. Had your husband really been lacking this entire time? Been leaving you so unsatisfied that a bit of doggy had you unravelling?Â
He couldnât bear the thought of you having to take care of yourself because your husband couldnât do it for you. But maybe that was a good thing. Because then Harry would be there for you. Heâd give you pleasure you had never experienced in your life. Over and over again.Â
Starting with tonight.Â
âFeel good baby?â Harry cooed, spanking your ass with a rough touch.Â
âYeahâÂ
âYeah?â He repeated, spanking you again on the opposite side. Your whine echoed around the room, as did the sound of the dining table squeaking forward against Harryâs nice floorboards. âSay it, baby. Tell me how Iâm doing, hm?â
âSo good. God, you fuck me so good.â You moaned, âplease- go⊠go harder. Harder.â
Harry picked up the pace, reaching to wrap your hair around his fist so he could pull your head back. âMoan for me, y/n. Moan my name.â He demanded right in your ear, spanking you twice on the same cheek.Â
âHarry.â You cried out, feeling him smile in satisfaction at how pretty you took the pain. So he spanked you again and again as you moaned loudly into the air.Â
âThatâs it⊠Good girl. Youâre taking it so wellâŠâ Harry gritted out, spanking your ass roughly while tightening his hand in your hair. You whined at the sting of your scalp, nearly sobbing at how fast and hard he was fucking into you. âSâlike you were made for me, y/n. Just made for my fucking cock.â
He was fucking you so hard, so fucking good that the table kept etching forward and forward. Harry had to keep readjusting his footing and his grip on your hair. He combed his fingers through your hair and wrapped it around his fist, tugging hard when the table slipped forward again.Â
But he was persistent and he wasnât going to let anything stop him from giving you the fucking you deserved.Â
âYâsounds so damn pretty moaning my name, baby. Fucking love how sweet you sound.âÂ
His words elicited a moan; a filthy pretty moan only exaggerated when he tugged your hair harder. âYouâre so big. So good.â You cried, âloveyourcock.â
You were addicted to the way he fucked you, even just the way he felt stretching you out but keeping completely still. It felt like you could almost reach an orgasm just like this with no clit stimulation at all which never happened. Nowadays it was your vibrator or nothing and now here you were one orgasm down and another so damn close.Â
Still, you needed your clit touched and you couldnât really reach it this way.Â
The table etched forward once more and right as he pulled back to thrust into you again, the table slid forward making him slip out completely. He effortlessly slid himself back into you to continue, but when it happened a second then a third time you couldnât help but giggle. Even through the deep pleasure and hazy mind, it was funny.Â
âFuck.â He cursed when his cock bumped against your ass cheek instead of where he actually wanted to be. He tapped it against your clit before grinding there, watching you squirm and let out a choked gasp through your light laugh.Â
âI think we may need to switch rooms.â You giggled, looking over your shoulder at him while panting as you desperately tried to catch your breath. He had let go of your hair for a moment, planning on trying to continue until you suggested moving things elsewhere.
Truth be told, Harry jerked one out before you came. He didnât plan the evening around having sex with you and wouldâve been okay if nothing happened at all, but his cock couldnât control itself around you. Just your presence and your scent could get him hard in no time so he tried to fuck the frustration out before you even got there.
He was glad he did so too because now that he was in the middle of feeling your sweet sweet cunt, he had a lot more stamina going onto his second orgasm. He could have you riding him through two more orgasms before needing to cum himself and fuck did he want to experience you squirting right on his dick.Â
âI think so.â He breathed through a laugh and ran his hand through his hair, âcâmere.â
âMh.â You agreed, standing up on shaky legs and sore hips. Harry grabbed you straight away and helped you turn around to face him. He cupped your face with one hand to guide your mouth to his, deepening it effortlessly while tucking his hands under your thighs so you could jump up and wrap your legs around him.Â
You were slightly shaky in his arms, sensitive as he placed you gently on the floor in front of his bed. He broke the kiss to look at you for a moment, panting heavily while brushing his nose against yours. There was something about the look in his eyes that had you crumbling inside. They were soft and almost loving; so full of yearning and desire that you were almost scared to look back. It was overwhelming.
Harry danced his fingers down your neck and shoulder to your arm where the strap of your bra had fallen. Every touch was making you shiver and only causing that ache between your thighs to grow. You felt empty. Cold without his cock inside you.Â
âTake this off. I want to see you.â Harry murmured, searching your eyes while waiting for you to nod before he kissed you once more and climbed onto his bed. He shuffled backwards until he was against his headboard, legs wide and cock hard and waiting for you to climb back onto him.Â
He never stopped looking at you. Never stopped watching even as he wrapped his own hand around his cock and gave himself a few tugs to the sight of your body becoming bare for him. The prettiest of prettiest lingerie on planet Earth couldnât compare to the sight of a womans naked body. Your bare, naked body. The soft peaks of your breasts and the way they fell naturally without a bra. The dip of your hips and tummy without the confides of lace. It was glorious.Â
Harry could barely contain himself.
âYouâre a vision.â Harry awed, jaw clenching like he was trying to control himself from dragging you onto the bed and pinning you down.Â
âSo are you.â You whispered while crawling towards him on the bed. You let your hands glide up his thighs once you were situated between them, taking the time to look over every inch of his naked body. You were in awe to put it simply and so goddamn attracted to him you were worried sex would never be the same afterwards.Â
Because it wasnât just the pleasure. It was the chemistry. The eye contact. The fact you two had a laugh about him thrusting against your ass cheek instead of inside of you because his table couldnât handle the pressure. The way you could have that laugh just minutes ago and be back to this. The firey eye contact and his trembling thighs underneath your palms.Â
âCan I have a tasteâŠâ You breathed, licking your lips at the sight of his cock up against his stomach. From this angle he looked even bigger than before and knowing he was just inside you⊠fuck. You could barely breathe. âPlease?â
Harry groaned and wrapped his hand loosely around your neck, only applying light pressure right beneath your jaw. âJust a little, y/n. For now the only place I want to come is with you coming around me.âÂ
If only he was bare inside youâŠ
âOkay⊠just a taste, H.â You nodded, pressing harder against his palm. You wrapped your palm around his cock, loving the sight of his jaw clenching at the touch. âCan I take this off?â You asked, rubbing over his head at the condom.Â
âYeah, baby. Take it off.â
Harry was going to lose his fucking mind.Â
You were quick to pull off the condom then wasted no time in dipping down and licking a fat stripe from balls to tip on the underside of him. Harry groaned and collected your hair in his hand so he could see your face. Your eyes fluttered closed at the taste of him and the weight of him on your tongue.Â
He was warm and heavy and you could taste yourself right at the base of his cock where your arousal dripped down. You made sure to clean it all up with your tongue, lapping at it while looking at Harry to watch his reaction. He could barely contain himself and with every lick his hand flexed in your hair like he was trying to control himself.Â
âYou can guide me. I like it when I choke.â You murmured, spitting directly onto his tip before sliding it into your mouth to spread it with your tongue.Â
âGod, youâre going to be the end of me.â He groaned, hand tightening in your hair with purpose. Harry reached for your spare hand, intertwining your fingers while pulling your mouth off him for a moment. You were like jelly in his hands, compliant as he instructed you to squeeze his hand once if you were okay and twice if he was too rough or you needed a break. More than happy with that arrangement, you agreed and squeezed his hand in preparation for him to guide your mouth down.Â
He started to gently maneuver your mouth up and down his length, starting shallow at first before going deeper until he felt the tightness of your throat around him. You choked ever so slightly but squeezed his hand once and enjoyed the feeling of his cock twitch down your throat.Â
âLook at meâŠâ Harry breathed, forcing your eyes on his. âThatâs it⊠fuck.âÂ
The sight had him gasping and moving your mouth over his cock faster. Your pretty little eyes all glistened with tears⊠God the sight was one of the hottest things he had ever seen. And the way you just took his cock without complaint and even moaned when you gagged around him⊠it was like you were made for him.
The feeling of his cock filling your throat was like nothing else. There was just something about choking on a manâs dick that got you all squirmy inside. You had always been a relationship girl and a bit of a âlate bloomerâ according to those who thought losing your virginity in your early 20s was the biggest sin of the century, but that didnât mean you were inexperienced.Â
Your first serious relationship exposed you to things you had always wanted to try. A world of kinks and things you werenât sure youâd like until you tried them, others you were certain youâd hate until you found out you didnât. You always considered yourself lucky to have a guy introduce you to sex and provide an environment where you could not only lose your virginity, but experiment without any shame or constraints.
Funny how you ended up married to your next serious relationship after him to a guy who had no interest in anything remotely more exciting than a spank and a sporadic hair pull. You loved Carson enough to be happy with vanilla but fulfilling sex. It wasnât like it didnât have any passion, because it did, it just didnât have this.
What Harry managed to provide you on your first night together (a night far from over as well) Carson couldnât give you in six years of being together. You werenât sure you could go back to your old sex life. Not now.Â
âYou look so hot like this.â You gasped, pulling off to breathe while jacking him off with your spare hand. Your other was still intertwined with one his and you had no plans of changing that. âI love having your cock in my mouth, HarryâŠâ you moaned, reaching in to lick his length once more. âFeels so good.â
âJesus.â Harry groaned, tensing his hand in your hair. âYouâre doing so well, y/n. Such a good little cock sucker, arenât you?âÂ
You moaned filthily at his degrade, letting him slide you back down over his cock. Your whole body was on fire. Even with only a little hand holding and hair tugging, you were beyond turned on and empty between your legs. The sight of him was just so beyond sexy, almost too sexy for you to handle.Â
His chest was heaving and glistening with sweat. With every pant or moan his abs would contract and his thighs would tremble on either side of your shoulders. You wanted to see him cum so bad. You wanted to watch his jaw contract and his mouth part as he moaned your name.Â
âYouâre gonna make me cum, y/n.â He warned in this almost whine of a tone. âNeed to cum inside you.âÂ
âI want it in my mouth. Wanna taste you.â You practically pleaded, tapping his tip against your tongue.Â
âYouâre incredibleâŠâ Harry groaned, using his hand on your hair to pull you up towards his mouth. He kissed you hungrily, angling your head in the direction he wanted so he could deepen it. âButâŠâ he panted, breaking just to say that one word before kissing you once more, âI need toâŠâ he nibbled on your lip and grabbed onto the back of your thighs, "⊠feel you around me when I come.âÂ
You whimpered as he dragged you in a straddle and pressed your wet cunt directly over his cock in a slow deliberate grind. Fucking hell. You just wanted to slip him in, to feel him bare inside you until you were full of his cum.Â
But you couldnât. And the fact you were half considering letting it happen on your very first sexual experience out of your marriage was insane. It scared you.Â
âCondom.â You uttered against his mouth, tugging on his hair ever so slightly.Â
âYeah. Yeah.â He breathed, barely able to concentrate when you dragged your mouth along his jaw and neck. Harry reached for his bedside table and grabbed another condom from the top drawer, returning quickly to kiss you again while blindly unwrapping it.Â
But it was like Harry was stuttering. Fumbling to do something as simple as putting a condom on his own cock. He couldnât help it really. Not when your mouth was so sweet and erotic, nibbling at his bottom lip until all he could think about was how to hold his breath indefinitely so he could kiss you forever.Â
And you were growing impatient. The few seconds delay in his movements had you so desperate you leaned back to breathe, took the condom from his hand and rolled it down on his cock in one swift motion.Â
âFuck me, baby.â This time it was Harryâs time to plead. He wound his hand in the hair at the nape of your neck and kissed you again, panting into your open mouth as you guided him to your entrance and dropped down on him once more.Â
His cock felt so much bigger from this angle and he felt deeper too even though he was just fucking you so hard his dining room table couldnât handle the force. Maybe thatâs why you couldnât control the loud whine flooding into his mouth when your clit hit his pubic bone. Or maybe it was because this position was far more intimate than being bent over.Â
âYouâre so big⊠feels bigger like this.â You gasped, lulling your head back while grabbing his shoulders for balance so you could start bouncing on him and getting a good rhythm going.Â
âI knowâŠâ he cooed, squeezing your hips before spanking you quickly. âShow me how much you need it, huh?â Leaning in, Harry ran his mouth along your exposed neck, panting between little bites and licks on your skin, âshow me how good mâcock makes you feel.âÂ
"Love your cock," You whined, already feeling the ache in your thighs as you picked up the speed.
Harry wrapped one arm around you and hugged you tighter while pressing the fingers of his spare hand directly to your clit. And with every bounce, every grind, his fingers stimulated right where you needed it the most. You were already so full with him and now he was giving you the cherry on top so you could finish.
"More... more, please. Need it harder."
"Need it harder?" Harry taunted, hiking his legs up on his feet in a wide position on the bed so he had enough stability to thrust up into you. "Like that?" He chuckled at your cry, squeezing your body in his arm so you stayed exactly where he wanted you.
"Yeah... yeah. Fuck!" you practically sobbed, unable to do anything but grab his hair or shoulders and just take how hard he was fucking into you. His legs were strong and while you were a sobbing, breathless mess above him, Harry wasn't losing momentum at all.
He was sweaty and panting but he never stopped thrusting up into you. At least that's what it felt like. While you gave up and begged for more, Harry was more than happy to take over and give you a fucking you'd never forget.
He thrived being in control. You could tell.
"That's it, y/n. You're taking it so fucking well, y'know that. Just sitting there and taking it like the good little slut you are. My fucking slut..." Harry cooed, dipping down to tug at your nipple. "Got me so fucking close, pretty girl. Just need you to come f'me."
Between his words and lips on your breast... his fingers pressed to your clit and the way his cock was bruising your insides, you couldn't hold on any longer.
âGod, Harry. âM gonna cumâ You cried, trying to warn him of the deep churning in your belly and the trembling in your toes.
"Look at me." He demanded, sliding his hand up into your hair to force your head in his direction. Your eyes fluttered open but despite your vision already hazy, you could clearly see the way his eyes were hooded, pupils wide and hungry. "That's it. Look at me while you cum, baby. Let me see how pretty you look."
Harry pressed his forehead to yours, opened mouths panting and brushed against one another. He watched closely when your mouth gaped wide and your eyes struggled to keep open as your orgasm hit. The way your brows furrowed and your entire body trembled on top of him and he could feel his lap and lower belly become soaked in your release.
It was glorious.
"Good girl." He praised, "Fuck. Fuck!" His words turned to mush when he reached his own orgasm and somehow even pulled you tighter against him so he could feel every inch of your soft skin.
Coming down was all open-mouthed kisses and laboured breaths and this distinct feeling that everything had changed. You two could never go back to casual and you most certainly couldn't look at yourself or your husband the same way ever again.
"I feel bad you only came once." You practically pouted, grabbing another spoonful of pudding to feed it to Harry. "It doesn't really seem fair."
What did seem fair, though, was finishing off the dessert neither of you ate after your intense workout. You were quite enjoying feeding a naked Harry delicious sugary puddings and it just felt morally wrong to leave the dessert sitting there when it was the perfect bridge between round one and two.
"Trust me. I'm more than satisfied." Harry chuckled once swallowing the delicious dessert. He dragged his fingers over your hip, loving how his t-shirt fit your frame. It was so casual and sexy. His clothes had never looked better.
"Well, I hope you're not tired because I'm not and I think I'd like to test your 27-year-old stamina." you shrugged casually, eating the last bite of the sticky date pudding.
"Oh really?" Harry raised his brow and gently took the spoon from your fingers to set them down on the plate. "Two orgasms wasn't enough for you?" He teased, moving the plate out of the way so he could cup your face and gently guide you down onto the bed.
"Mh mh." You shook your head with a smile and clasped your hands around the back of his neck while he adjusted your body to hover over you. "I think at least four..." you curled your leg around his hip and dug your heel right into the pudginess of his bum, "and I wouldn't mind a bit more effort put into making my ass red. You did promise that, didn't you?"
"More effort, huh?" He smirked and grabbed onto the underside of your jaw with a firm grip to pin you to the bed. "You've got no idea what you just started, little girl."
ââââââ ⥠âââââââ ââââââ ⥠âââââââ
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more omegaverse 141
You've been on base nearly six weeks and finally feel like you're setting into a routine. You get yourself up early, training yourself or your squad. You know omegas in active duty still carry a stigma, so you do your work before anyone else is up. No need trying to fight for a stall on the gun range against a bunch of alphas who don't believe you belong, or work in the gym to the whispers you know follow you everywhere. Better to get it done where they don't see.
You try to minimize your footprint on base, staying out of other soldiers' way and wearing scent blockers. You don't need to draw more attention to yourself. You're glad your work speaks for itself, but even that puts a target on your back.
You've already been approached by two alphas wanting to make you their pack omega. Both were clear, though, that they held traditional pack views. One was even ballsy enough to tell you you'd have your first pups within a year of his claiming.
He'd been stupid enough to bring all this up while sparring with you, expecting to prove he was better than you.
He ended up in medical with a broken nose and dislocated shoulder.
Price heard about these run-ins too and knew he needed to approach you differently, so when he sets his tray down a few seats from you at breakfast, you're not instantly wary. He glances at you as he eats, noting the array of fruits and protein on your tray. He appreciated that you ate healthy; it spoke volumes about how you'd play into pack dynamics.
He waits until you're nearly done to clear his throat and get your attention. You were the only two at the table, but that wasn't too uncommon. You knew your squad listened during trainings, but you weren't sure they entirely respected you, and with most of them betas, you understood the stigma that might follow them if they chose to socialize with you outside of trainings.
Price offers his wrist and waits. You look from Price's hand to his face and back before gently picking his hand up and smelling it. The light scent of smoldering embers and dying leaves and that unmistakable scent of alpha hits your nose. He smells like autumn, and you're momentarily disarmed.
"Cap'n John Price," he tells you. "Word 'a yer skill's makin' it's way 'round base." You make a noncommittal noise at that. You can only imagine the stories being told about you among the higher-ranking officers. "Got a proposition fer ya." You watch him, equal parts curious and wary. "Yer skills are just what my task force needs. 'Specially your work with ammunition. My sergeant said ya grouped head shots and center mass shots with three separate weapons."
You shrug. "Never saw the point in just gettin' good with one weapon, sir."
"And that's why 'm here," he says. "Wanna offer you a spot on the 141."
Your eyes widen and your breath catches. "What..." You've heard of task force 141. They're practically legends on base. "Are you... I mean..."
Your brain comes back online as you realize this isn't an alpha trying to breed you, this is a Captain building a strong, specialized group of soldiers, and he wants you to be part of it. There would be no higher complement, and no better way to prove omegas could be just as good in the field as betas and alphas. You quickly pull yourself together.
"That would be...it's an honor, sir. Thank you."
He watches your entire conflict and asks, clarifying, "So tha's a yes?"
"Yes, sir!" you reply enthusiastically.
next
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You Got Me So In Love, I've Never Been This Possessive
Summary: While on a scenic boat trip along the coasts of Malta, you bask in the crystal-clear waters, and laughter with Pedroâs cast and crew. Despite his injured arm keeping him on the boat, Pedro canât keep his eyes off you.
Paring: Pedro Pascal x F!Reader
Warnings: Established Relationship, TOOTH-ROTTING FLUFF, Slight Nudity, Slight Angst, Swearing, Anxiety, Cheesy Dialogue, Romance, Kissing, Real People Fiction, Cameras, Swimming, Bikini, Flirting, Teasing, Cast, Pedro Fell Down The Stairs, ER visit, Hurt-To-Comfort, Mild Spice, Banter, Idk Spanish so the terms might be wrong but I'm trying my best
Word Count: 5K
A/N: GOOD MORNING CHICKENS!!! Yâknow how I said there would be a part two? Yup. Also, I know no one asked, but back in High School, I fell down the stairs⊠A LOT. Like every year for six years. No major bones were broken, only a sprained ankle every time I fell down the stairs, so in a way I guess I was lucky. PSA to always hold the hand railing, and like Pedro said, it can happen to anyone!
Side note: Iâm dyslexic and English isnât my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and/or grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments, and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!
Song: Te Quiero by KISS OF LIFE
â Previous Chapter | Main Masterlist |
PASCAL RESIDENCE, CHILE â AFTERNOONÂ Â
The sun bathed the Pascal family home in a golden glow, the air filled with the scent of freshly baked empanadas and the gentle hum of conversation. You were seated on the patio, your legs tucked under you, watching as Pedro animatedly retold a story from his teenage years. His siblingsâJaviera, Lux, and NicolĂĄsâlistened with rapt attention, their laughter bubbling over when Pedroâs dad chimed in with his version of events, insisting Pedro had exaggerated again. Â
âExaggerated?â Pedro placed a hand on his chest, feigning offense. âI would never! Everything I say is 100% true and scientifically proven.â Â
âScientifically proven to be full of nonsense,â NicolĂĄs teased, earning a round of laughter. Â
You couldnât help but grin, soaking in the easy camaraderie of the family. Pedroâs hand found yours under the table, his fingers lacing with yours in a way that felt like second nature. He glanced at you, his dark eyes soft with a love so deep it made your chest tighten. Â
âTell them,â Pedro said, turning to you with an exaggeratedly serious expression. âTell them Iâm not lying.â Â
You bit back a laugh, tilting your head in mock consideration. âWell⊠the story did sound a bit too good to be true.â Â
âEt tu, mi amor?â he groaned, but the corners of his mouth quirked up in a smile. Â
Javiera, ever the ringleader, stood and declared, âEnough storytelling! Letâs put her to the test. If sheâs going to be part of this family, she needs to learn brisca.â Â
Pedro leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear. âFair warning: Theyâll gang up on you.â Â
âGood thing Iâve got you on my side,â you murmured, a soft blush rising to your cheeks. Â
âIâll always be on your side,â he whispered, pressing a kiss to your temple that sent a shiver down your spine. Â
A FEW HOURS LATERâŠÂ Â
The sun had dipped lower in the sky, casting long shadows across the yard. Pedro had wandered inside to grab more drinks for everyone while you stayed on the patio with Lux, discussing her latest project. Â
The sound of a crash shattered the peaceful air. You froze, the glass in Luxâs hand slipping and shattering on the ground. Â
âPedro!â you gasped, bolting toward the house. Â
Inside, you found him crumpled at the base of the stairs, his face pale and contorted in pain. NicolĂĄs was already at his side, his hands hovering uncertainly as if afraid to make things worse. Â
âCall an ambulance!â you shouted, your voice shaking as you knelt beside Pedro. Â
He looked up at you, his breaths shallow and uneven. âIâm okay, Iâm okay,â he said through gritted teeth, but his wince betrayed him. Â
âYouâre not okay,â you said, your hands trembling as you gently brushed the hair from his forehead. âWhat happened?â Â
âI missed the last step,â he muttered, trying to manage a weak smile. âGuess Iâm not as graceful as I thought.â Â
âPedro, this isnât funny,â you whispered, tears pricking your eyes. Â
Javiera appeared with the phone pressed to her ear, speaking rapidly to the emergency dispatcher. Lux crouched beside you, her face pale as she reached for Pedroâs uninjured hand. Â
âHelpâs on the way,â Javiera assured you, her voice steady despite the panic in her eyes. Â
Minutes felt like hours as you waited for the ambulance. You kept your focus on Pedro, your hand gripping his tightly. âJust breathe, okay? Iâm right here. Youâre going to be fine.â Â
THE ER â EVENING
The antiseptic smell of the hospital hit you as you paced the waiting room, your heart pounding in your chest. Pedro had been whisked away for X-rays, and you felt helpless, the absence of his hand in yours leaving you cold. Â
When the doctor finally emerged, you rushed to meet him, Javiera and NicolĂĄs close behind. Â
âMr. Pascal has a broken arm,â the doctor explained. âItâs a clean break, but heâll need surgery to set the bone properly. Weâre scheduling it for late January.â Â
Relief and worry collided in your chest. âCan I see him?â you asked, your voice small. Â
The doctor nodded, and you followed the nurse to Pedroâs room. He was sitting up in bed, his arm in a temporary sling, his face pale but his smile still intact. Â
âHey, troublemaker,â he said, his voice softer than usual. Â
You crossed the room in a few quick steps, perching on the edge of his bed. âDonât you ever scare me like that again,â you said, your voice breaking as tears spilled over. Â
Pedro reached for your hand with his good arm, his thumb brushing soothing circles over your knuckles. âIâm sorry, mi amor,â he murmured, his eyes glistening. Â
You leaned forward, pressing your forehead to his. âI thought⊠I thought something worse happened. I couldnât breathe until I saw you.â Â
âIâm here,â he whispered, his voice steady despite the pain. âAnd Iâll be fine. Especially with you by my side.â Â
You kissed him gently, pouring every ounce of love and relief into the touch. As his lips moved against yours, you felt the fear begin to fade, replaced by the overwhelming gratitude that he was still here with you. Â
âIâll take care of you,â you promised, pulling back just enough to look into his eyes. âWhatever you need, Iâm here.â Â
Pedro smiled, his gaze tender. âI donât deserve you.â Â
âDonât be ridiculous,â you said, brushing a tear from your cheek. âYou deserve the world.â Â
And in that moment, surrounded by beeping monitors and the sterile walls of the hospital, it felt like nothing else mattered but the two of you.
FORT RICASOLI, MALTA â DAYÂ Â
The sun was high over Fort Ricasoli, the Mediterranean breeze carrying a salty tang as waves crashed against the nearby shore. The reconstructed Roman Colosseum loomed grandly in the fort, its grandeur a perfect backdrop for the epic Gladiator II production. You stepped out of the transport van, sunglasses shielding your eyes from the bright Maltese sun, a bag slung over your shoulder filled with Pedroâs essentialsâmedication, snacks, and a cold water bottle you knew heâd try to avoid drinking unless reminded. Â
As you walked toward the set, Pedro spotted you first, his face lighting up in a way that made your heart ache with affection. He was seated in the shade near the makeup tent, his left arm encased in a royal blue cast that made him look both ridiculous and endearing. Â
âHi,â you called, setting your bag down beside him. âIâm here to be your nurse.â Â
Pedroâs grin widened, his dark eyes softening. âYouâre more than my nurse. Youâre my lifesaver. And I love you so much.â Â
You rolled your eyes playfully, leaning down to press a quick kiss to his forehead. âHowâs the arm?â Â
âItâs humiliating,â he muttered, holding up the cast as if it were a mark of disgrace. âEveryone keeps staring at it. Or laughing. Or both.â Â
âThereâs nothing humiliating about needing help once in a while, my love,â you said gently, brushing a curl from his forehead. âBesides, itâs a great conversation starter.â Â
âOh, yeah. Real smooth. âHi, Iâm Pedro Pascal, and I fell down a flight of stairs like a medieval jester.ââ Â
You smothered a laugh just as Joseph Quinn sauntered by, pausing dramatically to give Pedro an exaggerated salute. âHowâs the mighty warrior today? Still battling gravity, I see.â Â
âGo away,â Pedro groaned, waving his good arm dismissively. Â
âYouâre a walking PSA now,â Fred Hechinger added as he passed. âDonât text and walk down stairs, kids!â Â
Denzel Washington approached next, shaking his head with mock solemnity. âAnd here I thought I was the one whoâd pull a stunt like that.â Â
âTraitors,â Pedro muttered, pulling you closer as if you could shield him from the teasing. Â
Coco, his ever-sassy hair stylist, smirked as she fixed his curls. âJust make sure she doesnât trip over your ego next.â Â
âCoco!â Pedro whined, but his cheeks flushed, his pout making him look boyish and undeniably adorable. Â
Ridley Scott ambled over, his tone a mix of concern and exasperation. âTake it easy, Pedro. Youâre not 25 anymore.â Â
âGee, thanks, Ridley,â Pedro huffed, pulling you against him as if seeking comfort. Â
The day pressed on, the heat making Pedroâs clinginess somehow both unbearable and heart-meltingly sweet. Despite the steady teasing from the cast and crew, he stuck close to you like a second shadow whenever he wasnât on set, his blue cast drawing as much attention as his ever-present pout. Â
During a break, he tugged at your hand, a soft whine slipping from his lips. âGo with me?â Â
You glanced up from the book you were pretending to read. âGo where?â Â
âCraft services,â he said, gesturing toward the shaded area where snacks and cold drinks awaited. âIâm starving, and I need moral support.â Â
âYou literally just had a protein bar,â you teased, but stood anyway, slipping your hand into his. Â
âAs long as you hold my hand,â you added with a smirk, letting him lead the way. Â
His good hand entwined with yours, his thumb brushing lazy circles over your skin as you walked. âYou know Iâm not letting go, right?â Â
âI wouldnât expect anything less.â Â
Reaching the craft services tent, Pedro made a beeline for the iced lemonade, his cast making the process comically awkward. You reached over to help him hold the cup steady as he poured, ignoring the amused glances from the crew around you. Â
âI got it,â he insisted, though his pouty tone betrayed his frustration. Â
âSure you do, Mr. Dexterity,â you teased. âHere, let me.â Â
As you steadied the cup, Paul Mescal appeared beside you, a mischievous grin plastered across his face. âWhatâs it like being Pedroâs personal assistant and cuddle therapist?â Â
Pedro narrowed his eyes, his body shifting slightly as if to shield you from Paulâs teasing. âSheâs an angel,â he declared, his tone defensive. âUnlike all of you degenerates.â Â
Paul laughed, grabbing a handful of chips. âTouchĂ©.â Â
Connie Nielsen joined the growing group, her warm smile softening the teasing atmosphere. âAn angel with the patience of a saint,â she agreed. âHeâs lucky to have you.â Â
You squeezed Pedroâs hand, glancing up at him with a playful glint in your eye. âOh, I know.â Â
Pedro leaned down, his voice low and sweet in your ear. âRemind me to buy you something shiny and expensive later.â Â
âIâll hold you to that,â you whispered back, brushing a kiss to his cheek just as Coco walked by, her ever-present smirk firmly in place. Â
âAre we making out by the lemonade now?â she quipped, adjusting Pedroâs wig as she passed. âJust donât knock over the drink dispenser, Casanova.â Â
Pedro groaned, but you could see the corner of his mouth twitching, betraying his amusement. Â
When Pedro was shooting, you stayed nearby, perched under an umbrella with a bottle of water and a timer set for his next dose of medication. Heâd been restless all morning, constantly checking in between takes to make sure you were still there. Â
The moment the director called cut, Pedro scanned the area until his eyes landed on you. A small smile tugged at his lips as he made a beeline toward you, his costume slightly dusty from the action sequence. Â
âHydrate,â you ordered the moment he reached you, holding out the water bottle. Â
He wrinkled his nose but took it, his good hand struggling to unscrew the cap. You wordlessly reached over to help, earning a sheepish look from him. Â
âYou know,â he said after a long sip, âyouâre bossier than Ridley.â Â
âYou love it,â you countered, wiping the sweat from his brow with a small towel youâd tucked into your bag. Â
Pedroâs lips curved into a soft smile, his gaze lingering on you. âI do,â he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. âA little too much.â Â
Your heart squeezed at the tenderness in his tone, and you reached up to brush a stray curl from his forehead. âGood. Now go back to work. Ridleyâs glaring at us.â Â
He glanced over his shoulder, spotting the director gesturing for him to return. âFine,â he grumbled, but not before pressing a quick kiss to your forehead. Â
As he walked back toward the set, Ridley shook his head, a faint smile on his face. âThat woman of yours has you wrapped around her little finger.â Â
Pedro shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips. âDonât I know it.â Â
THE XARA PALACE RELAIS & CHĂTEAUX, MALTA â EVENING Â
The day had taken its toll on both of you, but by the time you returned to the cozy luxury of the hotel suite, Pedroâs exhaustion only seemed to amplify his need for affection. As soon as the door clicked shut behind you, he flopped dramatically onto the small couch, casting a forlorn look your way. Â
âCome here,â he said, his good arm extended toward you like a lifeline. Â
You chuckled, slipping off your sandals. âI thought you were tired.â Â
âI am,â he replied, his lips twitching into a pout. âBut Iâll sleep better if youâre right here.â Â
Shaking your head fondly, you joined him on the couch, only to be pulled down against his side the moment you were close enough. Â
âItâs too hot for this,â you teased, tryingâand failingâto push against his firm hold. Â
âDonât care,â Pedro murmured, nuzzling into the curve of your neck as if you were the only source of comfort in the world. âYou make everything better.â Â
You sighed softly, your resolve melting as your fingers found their way into his curls. They were still slightly damp from his post-shoot shower, and you gently combed through them, marveling at how they always seemed to spring back into place. Â
âI think thatâs the heatstroke talking,â you quipped, though your voice was warm with affection. Â
âNo,â he said, his voice muffled against your skin. âThatâs the love of my life talking.â Â
Your hand stilled for a moment, the weight of his words settling over you like a gentle wave. You pulled back slightly to look at him, but Pedro didnât let you get far. His warm brown eyes met yours, brimming with sincerity that made your breath catch. Â
âYouâre insufferable,â you said, though the tremor in your voice betrayed how deeply his words had affected you. Â
âAnd youâre perfect,â he countered, his tone so soft and certain it made your heart ache in the best way. Â
Your cheeks warmed, and you leaned down to press a tender kiss to his temple. âYouâre lucky I love you,â you whispered, your lips brushing against his skin. Â
Pedro grinned, his good arm tightening around you as he pulled you even closer. âIâm the luckiest man alive.â Â
For a while, the two of you sat in a comfortable silence, the soft hum of the air conditioning blending with the distant sounds of the Maltese evening outside. Pedroâs breathing began to slow, his head resting heavily against your shoulder as he drifted off. His cast was awkwardly propped up on his chest, and you carefully adjusted a pillow beneath it, not wanting him to wake up sore. Â
As you gazed down at him, his face relaxed and peaceful in sleep, your heart swelled with a familiar acheâone born of overwhelming love. He mightâve been clingy and dramatic, prone to complaints about his cast and the heat, but he was also tender and selfless, with a way of making you feel like the most cherished person in the world. Â
You traced the curve of his jaw with the tips of your fingers, marveling at how even in his sleep, his hold on you never loosened. He was steady and constant in a way that made you feel safe, loved, and utterly at home. Â
He mightâve fallen down the stairs, but it felt like you were the one fallingâdeeper in love with him every single day. Â
Later that night, as the two of you lay tangled together in the king-sized bed, Pedro stirred, his voice groggy but laced with warmth. Â
âAre you still awake?â Â
âBarely,â you murmured, your head resting against his uninjured shoulder. âWhy?â Â
He shifted slightly, his fingers grazing over your arm in lazy circles. âJust wanted to say⊠thank you.â Â
âFor what?â Â
âFor taking care of me. For putting up with me being clingy. For loving me even when Iâm ridiculous,â he said, his voice soft but earnest. Â
You smiled in the darkness, pressing a kiss to his chest. âItâs not putting up with you, Pedro. Itâs just loving you. And itâs the easiest thing Iâve ever done.â Â
His breath hitched, and he leaned down to press a lingering kiss to your forehead. âI donât deserve you,â he whispered, his words carrying the weight of unspoken emotion. Â
âYou deserve everything,â you replied, your voice firm despite the tears prickling at your eyes. Â
Pedroâs arms tightened around you, and in that moment, the world outside the four walls of your suite seemed to fade away. There was only the two of you, tangled together in love and gratitude, the promise of another day together stretching out before you like a gift. Â
And as you drifted off to sleep, cradled in his embrace, you couldnât imagine a place youâd rather be.Â
COASTS OF MALTA â MORNINGÂ Â
The morning sun bathed the harbor in a soft, golden glow as you and Pedro stepped onto the pristine deck of the yacht, greeted by the lively chatter of his castmates and the crew. The day promised adventureâan exploration of Maltaâs dazzling coastlines, including the famed Blue Lagoon, Crystal Lagoon, and the secretive caves on Comino. The air smelled of salt and freedom, and the water, impossibly blue and inviting, stretched out like a gem-laden carpet before you. Â
Pedro lingered close to you, his blue cast slung in a casual sling, though it didnât stop him from giving your hand a light squeeze. He leaned down, his voice low and teasing. Â
"Donât get too excited," he murmured with a grin, his dark eyes gleaming. "Youâll make me look bad."Â Â
You bumped your shoulder into his, rolling your eyes. "I canât help it if Iâm more fun than you."Â Â
"More fun? Or more distracting?" His gaze flicked briefly to the bikini peeking out from your cover-up, his expression bordering on predatory before he quickly masked it with a playful smirk. Â
âBehave, Pascal,â you teased, your cheeks warming under his intense stare. Â
As the boat cruised toward its first stop, the Blue Lagoon, the mood was light and cheerful. Connie and Fred lounged near the bow, animatedly swapping stories with the crew, their laughter carrying over the soft sound of the waves. Coco flitted around like a hummingbird with her camera, capturing candid shots of the lively group. Near the railing, Paul was attempting to teach Denzel a ridiculous dance move, the two of them tripping over their own feet and causing more chaos than rhythm. Â
You stood near Pedro, feeling the sunâs warmth on your skin, the gentle breeze teasing at your cover-up. A playful grin spread across your face as you untied the knot at your waist, sliding the fabric off and tossing it onto a nearby lounge chair. The vibrant bikini beneath was perfectly chosenâbright and bold against your skin, hugging your curves in a way that made you feel confident and beautiful. Â
Pedro, seated comfortably in the shade with his injured arm resting on a cushion, froze mid-sip of his drink. His gaze locked onto you, his eyes darkening as they traced every inch of your form. Appreciation was clear in his expression, but it was the simmering heat in his stare that sent a thrill down your spine. Â
You stretched your arms over your head, feigning oblivion to his attention as you joined Coco and Paul in their antics. The movement made your waist curve just enough to draw a quiet groan from Pedroâs lips, which didnât go unnoticed by Coco. She smirked, leaning down to whisper as she passed him. Â
âSubtle,â she teased, her voice dripping with amusement. Â
Pedro didnât even attempt to hide his grin. His eyes stayed glued to you as he shrugged, unapologetic. âCan you blame me?â Â
Coco snorted. âNot one bit. But maybe cool it unless you want everyone else to notice how thirsty you are.â Â
âLet them,â Pedro muttered, mostly to himself. His tongue darted out to wet his lips as he watched you laugh with Paul, the way your body moved under the bright sun making it nearly impossible for him to look away. Â
When you caught his eye and shot him a playful wink, his good hand flexed against the armrest of his chair, the urge to pull you back to him almost too strong to resist. Â
Later, as you leaned over the edge of the boat, peering down at the water with Paul pointing out fish, Pedroâs voice rumbled low behind you. Â
âYouâre enjoying yourself, arenât you?â Â
You turned to find him standing close, his cast resting awkwardly at his side. âI am. The waterâs beautiful,â you said with a smile, but his eyes werenât on the water. Â
âTheyâre not the only thing,â he murmured, his gaze dropping to the curve of your hips, the dip of your waist. Â
Heat bloomed on your cheeks, but you couldnât help the grin that tugged at your lips. âPedro Pascal,â you teased, stepping closer. âAre you flirting with me on a boat in front of all your castmates?â Â
âFlirting?â He scoffed, his voice rich with amusement. âIâm just admiring. Canât a man admire his girlfriend?â Â
âGirlfriend?â you repeated, arching a brow. Â
He smirked, leaning in just enough for his breath to ghost over your skin. âThe girlfriend,â he corrected, his voice dropping into a tone that sent a shiver racing through you despite the heat. Â
You bit your lip, glancing around at the others, who were too distracted to notice the charged moment. âBehave yourself,â you whispered, though your heart raced at the way his good hand brushed lightly against your hip. Â
He grinned, leaning back with an exaggerated sigh. âIâm trying, but youâre not making it easy, sweetheart.â Â
The way he said it, rough and low, had your stomach doing flips. The teasing sparkle in his eyes told you he knew exactly the effect he was having on youâand he wasnât the least bit sorry about it.
When the boat anchored near the Blue Lagoon, you practically bounced with excitement. âIâm going in!â Â
Pedro chuckled as you grabbed your snorkeling gear, pausing to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. âTry not to miss me too much,â you teased before hopping off the boat with an elegant dive. Â
âNot possible,â he called after you, his voice tinged with laughter. Â
The water was cool and crystal clear, every ripple catching the sunlight like scattered diamonds. You swam alongside Coco and Paul, laughing as he tried to outswim everyone only to splash clumsily when Coco teased him about his lack of grace. Schools of fish darted around you, their silvery bodies glimmering in the lagoonâs shallows, and the thrill of the moment made you forget the world beyond the sparkling blue waters. Â
Pedro watched from the deck, his good hand cradling a drink as his cast rested on his lap. He smiled softly, his heart swelling at the sight of you. You were so effortlessly kind, so radiant, laughing and splashing with his friends as if youâd known them your whole life. Â
âSheâs really something,â Ridley remarked as he joined Pedro at the shaded table. Â
âDonât I know it,â Pedro replied, his voice warm with pride. Â
âSheâs good for you,â Ridley said simply, his tone laced with a rare softness. Â
Pedro glanced at the director, a small smile tugging at his lips. âYeah. Sheâs my soulmate.â Â
Later, you clambered back onto the boat, droplets of water clinging to your skin, sparkling in the sunlight as they traced lazy paths down your arms and legs. Your grin was infectious, the kind of radiant joy that could light up an entire roomâor, in this case, the deck of the boat. Pedroâs eyes were glued to you, as though the rest of the world had faded into the background. Â
âHaving fun?â he asked, his voice tinged with amusement but warm with affection. Â
âThe best,â you replied breathlessly, grabbing a towel and wringing out your hair. âYou shouldâve come in with us. The water is incredible.â Â
He raised his cast dramatically, pulling a mock grimace. âIn case you forgot, Iâm a bit handicapped here.â Â
âOh, poor baby,â you teased, crouching beside him. You leaned in to press a playful kiss to his cheek, your lips lingering just long enough to make him sigh. âNext time, Iâll stay on the boat with you. We can sulk together.â Â
Pedroâs good hand slid to your waist, pulling you closer before you could stand. âDonât you dare,â he murmured, his voice a low rumble in your ear. âWatching you have fun out there is the next best thing to being in the water myself.â Â
You arched a brow, motioning to your bikini with a teasing grin. âYou mean you like the view.â Â
Pedroâs lips curved into a slow, devilish smirk. His mouth brushed your ear as he whispered, âI love the view.â Â
The heat of his words sent a shiver down your spine, making your cheeks flush. You swatted at his chest playfully before standing and tossing the towel over your shoulder. âCareful, Pascal. Youâre not supposed to overheat with that cast on.â Â
The boat anchored near the caves on Comino, the turquoise water shimmering like liquid glass. Pedro waved you off with a mock sternness, insisting you go explore while he stayed behind. Â
âIâll hold down the fort,â he said, settling back into his chair with a small smirk. âDonât get lost in there.â Â
You rolled your eyes, blowing him a kiss before diving into the water with Paul and Fred. The group swam toward the darkened entrance of the caves, their laughter echoing off the limestone walls. Inside, the sunlight filtered through cracks, casting dancing patterns on the rocky surfaces. Â
Pedro, stuck on the boat, didnât seem to mind in the slightest. His gaze followed you like a shadow, lingering on the curve of your body as you moved effortlessly through the water. Every so often, you glanced back at the boat, catching him watching you. He didnât even pretend to look away, his expression soft, adoring, and entirely unguarded. Â
When you returned, dripping wet and exhilarated, you plopped down beside him with a dramatic sigh, leaning your head against his shoulder. Â
âYouâve been staring at me all day,â you teased, your tone light but your heart pounding at the intensity of his attention. Â
Pedro turned his head slightly, brushing his lips against your temple. âCan you blame me?â he murmured. âYouâre the most beautiful thing Iâve ever seen.â Â
The sincerity in his voice made your chest tighten. You tilted your head to meet his gaze, your hand finding his on the armrest. âYouâre laying it on thick today,â you joked, though your voice wavered just slightly. Â
âItâs the truth,â he countered simply, his thumb brushing across your knuckles. Â
Your moment was interrupted by Paulâs exaggerated wolf whistle from across the deck. âGet a room, you two!â Â
Fred chimed in with a loud groan. âSome of us are single and fragile!â Â
You laughed, your head falling back briefly before you turned to Pedro, lowering your voice so only he could hear. âTheyâre just jealous.â Â
âDamn right, they are,â Pedro said, leaning in close. âYouâre all mine.â Â
The possessiveness in his tone was playful but sent your pulse racing nonetheless. Â
Later, as the boat rocked gently in the open waters, you sat on Pedroâs lap, his good arm wrapped securely around your waist. The sun had begun its descent, painting the sky in hues of pink and gold. Â
âPedro,â you said softly, your fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns on his thigh. âCan we stay like this forever?â Â
His eyes softened as he looked down at you, his smile tender. âIâd stay here with you forever if I could,â he replied, his voice filled with quiet certainty. Â
The weight of his words settled over you, grounding you in the moment. You bit your lip, leaning in closer until your noses brushed. âPlease just kiss me already.â Â
Pedro didnât need to be asked twice. His lips captured yours in a kiss that was slow and deliberate, full of unspoken promises and a depth of feeling that took your breath away. His hand splayed across your back, pulling you impossibly closer as the world around you seemed to disappear. Â
When you finally pulled apart, his forehead rested against yours, and he let out a soft laugh. âI think you might be my soulmate,â he said, his voice a mixture of awe and certainty. Â
Your eyes searched his, and for a moment, the noise of the others and the gentle lapping of the waves faded entirely. âI think you might be mine too,â you whispered, sealing the moment with another kiss. Â
Laughter and chatter echoed around you, the boat a hub of joy and togetherness, but for you and Pedro, time seemed to stand still. In his arms, surrounded by the beauty of Malta and the warmth of his love, you knew you were exactly where you were meant to be.
#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x f!reader#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x ofc#pedro pascal fanfic#real people fiction#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal#gladiator 2#pedrito#marcus acacius#general acacius#pedrohub#joel miller x reader#pedro pascal x plus size reader#pedro pascal x reader masterlist#pedro pascal x reader series#marcus acacius x reader
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Messages From Your Forever Person
Pile 1 - Pile 2 - Pile 3
Remember, this is a general reading and it may not resonate for everyone or completely. Tarot is a tool to help guide but you are responsible for your actions and life, you choose your path.
Just a note!: I donât like doing general love readings because I donât feel like they are as personal as, well, personal love readings, but I had the urge to make one. Your forever person can be what you consider your significant other, long-term partner, or future spouse.
Tips!
|Pile 1
Tarot: King of Pentacles, The Fool, Ace of Pentacles, Three of Pentacles, Black Numen, Six of Wands, Knight of Pentacles, Three of Swords, Ace of Swords, The Star, Ten of Cups (Bottom of the Deck:
Oracle: Uplift, Forgiveness, Consistency
You know how the planet Jupiter is the defender of our solar system? How Jupiter pulls asteroids away from Earth and even take the hits itself? Thatâs the energy of this person. As soon as I pulled the cards, I got the feeling of comfort from a strong and stable energy. I must say, this person also has a comforting smile and as soon as you look at them, your nerves will instantly be soothed. They feel like they are standing beside me, hands in pockets, as they watch me write this. They could have a favorite cream cable knit sweater that they like to wear as soon as thereâs a chill in the air.Â
They are very patient and have the mentality of âit doesnât have to be perfect, it just has to be doneâ. You could suffer from anxiety, but I feel this panicked and shaky energy coming from you. I donât know if you used to be yelled at or punished for doing something wrong by a parent or partner, but it feels like you are terrified of doing anything around your forever person at first. And there are cards here that are telling me that you have been hurt in the past. It seems like this could be the first safe and healthy partner youâve had. This could just be the first partner youâve ever had and now you're 20/25+ years old and you donât know what youâre doing, which brings out this anxiety towards this relationship. But your partner here holds a lot of patience and comfort for you! They really love you. Honestly, this is really fucking close to unconditional love (which is rare). They hold no judgement towards how you operate now because of your past, absolutely not. And they want you to know that. Itâs like they have told you this but you continuously donât believe them, which does hurt them a little ngl. The Jupiter reference could be what this was for. They will take the small hurts you do but persistently and consistently show up until you believe in their love for you. And itâs not that you donât know, but there is a voice in your head that makes you doubt often even if there isnât proof of those thoughts.Â
God, pile 1, they love you. They are such a steady energy. They are also very stable in the physical and spiritual realms. They are a very hard worker and would do anything to help your dreams become a reality. Your dreams are their dreams and vice versa. They really just want a peaceful home life with you honestly; they like the simple things. I think a good personality reference would be the husband to the pregnant wife in Kikiâs Delivery Service.Â
They really want me to drive home the message of forgiving yourself, pile 1. Sure, your actions or thoughts do hurt them sometimes, but they donât really want that to be the focus. They want you to be aware that they do but in a way to help you heal. They arenât your past partner, they arenât going to react like your parent, they arenât playing you just because you havenât had a partner. Itâs heartbreaking that you would dare to even compare them to others. Maybe this person hides a lot of their hurt not to upset you and this is a hurdle that they have to work through. Itâs only really coming out towards the end so thatâs why I want to say that.Â
I think this message was to let you know how the beginning part of your relationship will be like. They just want to make you aware of it, maybe so you can comfort the insecurities you have so the beginning wonât be as difficult.
|Pile 2
Tarot: Ten of Swords, Queen of Pentacles, Six of Swords, The Hierophant, Three of Pentacles, King of Cups, Three of Cups, The Sun, King of Pentacles, Seven of Pentacles, The High Priestess, The Moon
Oracle: The Moon (again!), Wept Breath, The Chariot, Vulnerability, Divinity, Sacred
Before I pulled the cards, I heard six months to a year or eight weeks. I donât like to do timing but thatâs what I heard. So if that feels right to you, then take it. Or somewhere between a waning crescent and a waning gibbous moon.
Honestly, they are just happy to be here. I think they were ready to give up on love after so many failed attempts and heartbreak before you came along. And you honestly couldâve sworn off love too but you saw them and was like âI want that one.â This is the black cat, golden retriever pile. Raven and Beast Boy, Maleficent and Diaval, or Roger Rabbit and Jessica Rabbit.Â
The vulnerability oracle strongly comes from your side. It does come from theirs but they admit that they were practically enchanted by you. âThe idea of giving up on love was a stupid idea on their part, sorry your highness, that was my bad.â They just folded and they would happily fall under any love spell you send their way. They are obsessed with you, in the most healthy way possible. They are banging the table with their fist, credit card in hand. Thereâs an energy that you were in the same room with them and kept your eye on them because you were drawn to how âpatheticâ they were. You couldnât help yourself so you gave in. Thereâs also an energy of âof course, youâre the fated one to be with me.â You two end up talking and you could kinda bust their balls a little, tease and be a little sassy, but they keep up with you and âpass your little test.âÂ
I donât think they were necessarily a player in the past but they had quite a few lovers and most of them played your person. They could have the vibe of one just from how cheeky and flirty they are but those thoughts are soon squashed with you seeing how pathetically devoted they are to you. They are just a lover at their core, they like to keep things light and fun, but they also know how to be serious and fix any issue that comes up in the relationship. They would truly do anything for you. This could come from an insecurity of not getting the love they needed from their past partners so they are overcompensating to keep you in love with them. :(Â
Are these the older daughters/siblings that I usually get? There could be something here that they have a pretty put-together family and youâre the first partner that the family actually loves. You could honestly get the love and care that you missed out on with their family.Â
God, I keep seeing your partner looking at you with the biggest heart eyes and they do this all the time, which could make you so flustered. This could be one of the things about them that honestly gets you to melt a little and lower some walls you have up. This feels like a love that you probably didnât get to experience in your teen years but this will span on until you're old and wrinkly. They will carry the âhoneymoon phaseâ through the rest of your lives. You know those videos that people make of their parents being in love and fooling around? Thatâs you two!Â
Thereâs just an overall feeling of excitement coming from them. They could talk about you a lot to their friends and family, but not in a bragging way. They are just so happy with you and thinks youâre the most beautiful person they have ever seen. I heard âA wish I didnât know I was wishing for.â
|Pile 3
Tarot: Two of Cups, King of Swords, The Hermit, The Fool, ? Dreamworld (reconnection), Six of Wands, Two of Wands, Four of Pentacles, Five of Cups, The Chariot (rest, feeling at home)
Oracle: Serenity, Sincerity, Respite, Surrender
If this resonates, this could be a lover you had that had passed away.
For others, this pile is for the ones who believe in lifetimes before the one youâre currently living. Energy is recycled after all. This is the more mystical pile.Â
Your person here has a large energy and could come off as cold and intimidating. They have come to me wearing all black, leather boots, and darker hair. They have very muscular arms and a broad chest, very tall. They could be goth. This couldâve been them in the past life or that is how they show up in this lifetime. They have their head down as they stand beside me and there is an energy of wanting you to know they are here. Their soul does watch over you and guide you but they may stay quiet and donât give you many signs or messages that they are around. But I suppose they came through today to say hi!Â
They are very protective over you and they think youâre a ray of sunshine that graces their life. They arenât one to show many emotions nor really speak them out, but you accept this and know that you are deeply loved. They know you doubt that they even exist or if they are coming or if they love you and so they are very hesitantly showing up through this reading to say that âIâm on my wayâ and âjust sit tight.â They could have a deeper voice. They could give you reassurance if you ask for it, by the way! They want me to specify that so they donât come across as heartless. I think youâre the only one that they truly love with their whole being and they do make it known, but if you need a little verbal reassurance, all you gotta do is ask. They are a cat person.
There is something here that you may have lived in timelines where they never got to exist in, like it has been a long while since you two have been together. I heard, âI waited for the right time.â There couldâve been timelines where your lives probably wouldnât have worked together or it was going to end in tragedy âlike the one I met you in.â So they had to wait. And they watched over you through each timeline. Everytime you didnât get to live a happy lifetime or if your partner of any lifetime didnât treat you right, it would make your person terribly upset and they couldnât do anything about it. They are very upset while they show this to me, angry and frustrated. But this lifetime is the one where you two will finally be together.Â
You could feel like you are meant to be someone, like a little void spot where your soul isâŠand you could be waiting out until you meet this person. You actually couldâve done this for the past three lifetimes (which you probably lived more happily than others). And this couldâve been a lifetime where you planned to do the same thing, but your person is coming in. You will be suspicious but you will probably be very enamoured by them. They are different than others and stand out to you. I think they like to rub your back because I just got the feeling of someone doing that to me. They let you be your bubbly and lively self and actually love that about you. They have complete trust in you. They may be on the more quiet/shy side but you two work together perfectly. You two can rest easy in this lifetime.Â
Dividers: @inklore
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Wants and Needs
Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Joel x Reader
Summary: Bills are high; your dadâs boss wants to help. How you pay him stays between you and himâfor now.
Warnings: 18+. Protected piv. Explicit power imbalance in an exchange of sex for money, so dubcon, technically. Soft dom!Joel. Sex toys. Squirting. Oral (f!receiving). Overstimulation. Daddy kink. Age gap. Praise kink.
Note: Bohananâs is a steakhouse in San Antonio, TX.
Word count: 8.4k
You wanted a car. Joel needed to cum.
It wasnât the arrangement a girl your age shouldâve made, but what could you do? Your dad drank half of your college funds away, and your mom was long gone.
The next best thing was Mr. Miller, your fatherâs boss. Heâd understood better than anyone what money could buy. What it might do. For him, it was pleasure. For you, it was a futureâor what little remained after bills and loans and exorbitantly-priced car repairs bled you dry.
You took the job at the firm on a whim. You didnât want to be a lawyer anymore, though your dad and Joel were. You didnât want to be done with law school, though 3L had already long since ended, and that dreaded so-called âminimum competencyâ test was drawing close on the horizon. In short, you couldnât afford to pay for bar prep.
With Joel, you could.
It was true that tax law paid pretty well, but a part-time job would never really be enough when your family was treading water at all times. Your dad liked to gamble and drink, and your brothers got all of their brains from him.
You got the short end of the stick, plus the receiving end of another. Lucky for you, Joelâs felt pretty good going in.
Today you were somewhere south of Austin. Your truck wouldnât start last week, so youâd agreed to come along on this business trip knowing full well what you planned on asking your boss as soon as you had a moment alone.
âCDP hearing atâŠ9:45.â You checked the itinerary twice.
âAlright.â Joel nodded.
âLunch with Javier, Ezra, and Dave at twelve.â
âMhmm.â
âPhone call with Revenue Officer Acacius at 3:30.â
âFor theâŠ?â
âMartells.â
âOkay.â
âI finished Lucien Floresâ Form 433-F for your review and left notesââ You stopped to tap your finger on a short white pile of papers between you and Joel on the desk, ââin the margins. Still need bank statements from him.â
âLovely.â
Joel eyed the stack at first, but his gaze strayed a little.
âYou should probably plan to talk strategy with my dad before Mayor Garciaâs audit tomorrow, too. Looks like a couple non-cash contributions are being disputed now.â
For a second, your eyes flitted up to him, too. It was brief.
âSure. Whenâs your daddy free?â he said.
You blinked, then scanned the schedule.
âLooks like fiveâŠor six, maybe. Heâs got a consult withââ
âI wasnât talking about your father.â
You looked back up. Joel was smirking, of course. His hand had drifted a comfortable, innocent distance past the papers and across the table, to you. The pair of you happened to be in one of the glass-paneled conference rooms nearest the hotel lobby, so he had to be discreet.
He never let his fingers stray too long on yours in public. Presently, his thumb grazed your knuckles extra slow.
Posing a question, maybe.
You didnât have the time to be tactful now, unfortunately.
âI need $2,700.â
Joel, your boss, your daddy, whatever, had to pause at that. He didnât move his hand immediately, but he did stare harder. Longer. He searched your face for the joke.
â$2,700?â he repeated.
âYes sir,â you answered out of habit, wincing only a little, âMy truck stopped running last week, and itâs justâŠa lot.â
The cost. For Joel, it wasnât even a drop in the bucket, but in your world, it was a make-or-break, fuck-your-whole-budget-for-the-next-six-months kind of bad. Suddenly, your cheeks felt warmer than they did before, and you forced yourself to look away. Peering out across the wide and gently rolling terrain of San Antonio and trying to pretend there was something thrilling to see. Youâd almost forgotten how much you hated asking this.
âI can make the deposit tonightââ Joel started.
âNo,â you interrupted. You wanted to turn but couldnât. You just shook your head and kept staring out there, âNot now, I meanâŠI need to earn it over time, I justâŠâ
You stumbled over the words. It was like your lips, your tongue, and your teeth were all suffering from the same sort of embarrassment pervading the brain, and you couldnât bring your mouth to form the sentences right.
Iâm not asking for a handout. I need to earn the money.
However âearningâ may have been grossly misconstrued in the context, it was a labor all the same. You didnât love it, but you didnât hate him, either. Joel was nice, albeit old enough to be your father, and it didnât seem that he was nearly as predatory or perverse as he couldâve been. Youâd been working for him for two months now, and the idea had been your own when the cash had gotten tight.
Back in April, youâd explained to him, calmly, that you couldnât take the bar exam unless you got some extra money quick. That you wouldnât accept his charity, but youâd pay him back in other ways. Joel had been against it at firstâyou were the daughter of his best friend, after allâbut eventually, his carnal needs won out over his sense, as every other man wouldâve done, you guessed.
At first, youâd started slow, but that hadnât lasted very long. You fucked him regularly now, though never had you asked for an amount of cash this big out of nowhere.
Joel blinked and put a hand on his hip, like he always did when he wasnât sure what to say. The silver in his soft, dark locks shone more in this light. Heâd lost the smirk.
âYouâve doneâŠplenty.â Now sounding sheepish.
You tried to protest again; Joel stopped you.
âI mean it. Hey, look at me,â he said next.
You did, hesitatingly. You turned from the window, and out of instinct, folded your arms over your chest. Joel paced closer to you and then he was watching. Pausing.
Brushing your arm with his and glancing once over your shoulder to make sure no one else was around to see.
He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your temple.
When he pulled away, your skin was practically ablaze.
âMr. Millerââ
âJoel,â he corrected, quiet, âAnd youâve done enough. Let me cover the car just this once, okay? Sweetheart?â
You didnât realize you were pivoting again. That your gut was doing somersaults and your heart was ready to climb up and out of your throat. Your neck was burning.
It wasnât even anger you sensed was simmering under the skin until you turned back to him, and your eyes flashed with ire before the words were even spoken.
âI donât need your pity, Mr. Miller. I said I want to pay.â
âItâs Joel. And I said youâve done enough, soââ
Ire morphed to something more in a blink.
You didnât mean to say it, but you did.
âFine,â you huffed, suddenly exasperated, âIf youâre so fucking opposed to me paying my way for this one simple thing, Iâll get another guy. Forget I asked.â
It was a low blow, for sure. Joel knew how badly youâd wanted this to stay between just you and himâand he would never dream of seeing you âearning your keepâ with anyone else. His expression said as much as soon as heâd heard your words; his whole face hardened at once.
But then youâd turned to leave. You didnât care what he wanted to tell you, and if you did, you certainly werenât brave enough to stick around to hear Joel say it then.
So you left. He had a full, busy day ahead of him anyway.
You woke up wet.
In an effort to avoid your boss, youâd run errands all day. Buried your nose in a sea of Civil Procedure notes as soon as you got a second alone, almost vomited seeing the Erie Doctrine, and went back to your hotel room to try and study there. Once you had, you napped instead.
Now your clothes stuck to your skin; the sheets around you were soaked. You peered over the big white duvet holding your body interred and saw smoke overhead.
Or steam.
Yes, definitely steam. It was drifting from the bathroom, where the door was thrown open. You shifted up to sit.
âTess!â you yelled, âShut the goddamn door, Iâm boiling.â
As a law clerk, you werenât afforded the luxury of a suite to yourself, so you shared it with the other new grads on work trips like these. Tess Servopoulos loved long, hot showers and never closed the fucking door. You groaned.
And, feeling depleted of all energy from your studies and the stress and the steam searing every inch of your skin, you flopped back in the bed. You kicked the covers off your legs. Youâd just lifted a hand to wipe the sweat from your forehead, when an awful, fresh realization dawned.
You glanced at the clockâ3:37.
âFucking hell,â you hissed.
You were supposed to meet your dad at two to get some paperwork signed. You needed to have that filed with the court by four. He was probably engaged somewhere else by now, whether it be a client, a conference, or a couple white lines in the bathroom of a partners-only club downtown, and you wouldnât have a hope of reaching him here. You rubbed your face and groaned again.
Youâd set an alarm for 1:30âyou knew you had.
Where the hell was your phone? Why was it so warm? What if heâd called? Aw fuck, heâs probably blown that thing up to hell and back by now. Maybe he was drunk. He had to be. Where was Tess? Where were your pants?
Youâd made it up to your feet, clumsily, and faced a full-length mirror. Your bottoms were gone. You closed your eyes and screamed inside, remembering why they were.
âGlad youâre getting some use out of this.â
The second you heard it, your lids flew open. You turned.
And, standing in the warm yellow glow of the bathroom lightâholding the culprit, your vibrator, like a prizeâwas Joel. Naked as the day he was born, save for one thin towel around his hips, and grinning. Moisture glistened on his chest and pooled about his feet, and his hair was smooth, tamed, and combed back neatly from his face.
He waved your silicone toy in the air, and immediately, you regretted giving him your room key the other day.
âI thought we agreed youâd wait for meââ
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â
Your voice was thick with sleep. Joelâs own was slow, dulcet, and kind as it always was, even when teasing. When you grit your teeth, he just set the toy aside.
âIâm sorry. Bad timing. I saw yourââ
âNo.â You threw up both hands at once, suddenly out of breath and fucks to give, âYou know what? I donât care. You need to go. I have to be down at the courthouseââ
In twenty minutes. You cut yourself short and hurried off to find shoes. You could wear other pants. Ask another attorney to sign the forms if you couldnât reach your dad. Forget that his boss and yours had just caught you with the vibrator heâd bought you last month and try not to feel too humiliated knowing he knew what youâd been doing. It didnât matterâJoel didnât matter. You slid on a mismatched pair of slacks and set off toward the door.
Then you had to stop. Joel beat you there, quick as ever.
âListen. Hey.â
âWill you stop?!â
You pushed at his big and wet, stupidly broad chest. You felt the small grey hairs on his pecs tickle your palms, and for a second, you thought you heard a chuckle.
âYouâre gonna make me lateââ
âHey, hey,â Joel said again. Of course it sounded fatherly, âI already signed the POA for Morales, hon, youâre good.â
Youâre good.
âYou what?â You stared at him in disbelief. How did he even know you needed Frankieâs power of attorney signed in the first place? You figured your dad wouldâve mentioned it, but still, it wasnât really Joelâs form to sign.
âThe case is mine now,â he clarified, reading that look, âWasnât my first pick, but it is what it is. And your dadââ
Your dad was probably lagging wildly behind on his own caseload, so heâd pushed one off on his friend. Again.
âYou canât keep picking up his slack,â you gritted out, âOne of these days itâs gonna bite you both in the ass. You know he shouldnât be forcing these jobs on you.â
âI offered.â
âYou caved.â
âHeâs my best friend, what do you expect me to do?â
âNot let him use you! Heâs making you feel bad for him.â
âAnd what if I did? What if I did pity the bastard?â
You scoffed. Then winced, inwardly.
I donât need your pity, Mr. Miller.
From the look on Joelâs face, he seemed to be remembering the same. He shook his head.
âThatâs notâŠâ he trailed off. He rubbed his jaw with his hand and started to move from the door, deflating some.
His other arm extended to you, wordlessly, and already anticipated what was sure to follow. You swatted him off, then walked to the bed. You considered sitting but didnât. Instead, you crossed your arms like you always did and turned away, facing the window with a cool, flat affect.
By now, Joel knew better than to take that for what it seemed. He crossed the room to you, treading softly.
His voice turned gentle again, like an apology: âHoneyâŠâ
But your gaze was already fixed outside. You frowned.
âDarlinâ,â Joel continued, undeterred, âCome on.â
And you didnât need to see his face to hear the rest: âLook at me, please,â with eyes all comfort and warmth.
âDonât you have a phone call with an R.O. or something?â Briefly, you recalled Acacius and a stream of other items from the checklist youâd covered that morning, and you had to stop yourself then from straying too far. You blinked once, just as Joel was approaching from behind.
âI cancelled,â he said.
You sighed, âMr. MillerâŠâ
You knew he hated doing that.
âJoel,â he pressed. Adding, âSomething came up.â
You wouldnât even ask. You shouldnât care. You felt him standing there, fanning hot breaths across the nape of your neck, and you really couldnât have taken that worse. You visibly tensed, hands balling into fists at your sides, andâhell, he wouldnât quit moving now, would he?âJoel bent down. He hesitated, as if gauging your reaction in time, then descended further. He kissed your shoulder.
You cracked; it never took much from him.
For all your inane, ancillary plays at feigning indifference, one movement of Joelâs mouth and your resolve was lost. You clung to words, weakly, but all the rest fell away.
âWe donâtâŠwant your charity. Me or my dad. Alright?â
âI know.â
Joel kissed your skin again, then pulled at the strap of your blouse. It fell limply away, and his lips reattached.
Exactly when heâd walked you back to the bed, you couldnât be sure. By the third or fourth kiss, your stomach was tight, knees weak, and your eyes drawing closed; it didnât matter to you or to him what had passed before. Your bodies found the bed and blended together.
Tangling, in a way. Tearing blindly at clothes and not saying too much apart from Joelâs soft, sweet words:
âThatâs it.â
âI know.â
âGood girl.â
Good girl when he kissed you. Good girl when he stripped you bare. Good girl when his hands roamed the broad, naked expanse of your body and let your own do the same to him. Good girl when your fingers hooked the outline of the towel and tugged it away, your vision filled with a sight youâd come to like more and more each day.
âThatâs my girl,â Joel murmured. He cradled your head while you gripped his base, ââSâyours, baby. All yours.â
Yours. Mine. You werenât sure you had the sense or self-possession to even know what that meant, especially here. Joel wasnât a boyfriend. He wasnât a lover, at least not in the traditional sense. He wore dark wool suits like your father and worked from dawn until dusk every day, practicing law for longer than youâd been alive. Still, the smile above you was sweet. It coaxed you gently as you slid your hand up and down his length, like he sensed this was more like a lesson for you. Learning experience.
âRemember, spit a little first,â he instructed. Then, to demonstrate this point, he brought his fingers to his mouth and wet them quickly. He slipped his touch down to yours and met your gaze while he joined you there.
He rubbed and slicked himself up and he did it with ease. You followed his lead and watched his face contortâcrowâs feet pinching even tighter at the sides of his eyes as pleasure began to pool in his gut. He looked pretty. Youâd never thought to tell him this, but Joel really had an unparalleled face. It was an old and beautiful thing. For this reason, you couldnât bring yourself to tear your gaze away, maybe to wet your own fingers. Instead, you slipped your hand between your legs, where his hips had come to rest. You worked a slow, light touch against your folds; you were drenched, and it didnât take long for your fingers to be, too. You moved them back to Joelâs cock.
âLike this?â you ventured.
The man answered with a grunt, at first. Then a grin.
âYeah. Yeah,â Joel nodded, quiet but emphatic. Trying not to smile too big as he let your touch take over for his, âJust like that, sweet pea. Get it nice anâ wet for daddy.â
You wanted to whimper at that. Something mustâve flashed in your eyes at the intonation of the last word, and the look mustâve suffused your whole expression, because the next thing you knew, Joel was lowering his body to yours. Petting your hair, letting you rub on his shaft as fast as your soft, lithe hands could manage.
âFeel that, baby? Feel how much daddy missed you?â
You did.
Your brow pinched, and you wanted more of that. More from him: those tender, edifying words of praise being mumbled your way while your touch worked him over. Maybe you couldâve helped it, but then again, in this state, maybe you couldnâtâyou whimpered for him.
Wriggling your hips against the bed to get your warmth pressed flush with his own, and squeezing him tighter:
âIn me, daddy. Please.â
You angled his cock in your trembling grip to plead as much. You knew he liked being the one to push in the first time, so you didnât move too far with that push, but you begged him with your gaze. You felt him tense a bit.
And just when you sensed he might let you have your way, he moved off. Down. Sliding his torso away from your own, to go lower on the bed, and smirking again.
âI think she needs my tongue first, doesnât she?â
You wanted to nod. Instead, you flinched. You crawled away from his hold before it could secure itself firmly on either one of your legs, and you had to snag your bottom lip between your teeth to contain that blossoming need. It almost spilled from your mouth in a moan before Joelâs could reach your lower half. Then you scrambled to sit up
âNo,â you choked out.
This wasnât new. While you shook your head, Joel lifted a brow and stood from the bed. He reached behind him.
The night stand.
You closed your eyes.
âThis isnâtâŠsupposed to be for me.â you sighed.
In a second, Joel was back where he started, and you didnât have to steal a glance through your lids to know what he was holding. Slotting himself gently into place.
âDonât,â he started, sharp, ââsay that. I mean it.â
You knew he meant it, but you also knew better than to accept at face value what he said, moving down on you.
This wasnât part of the deal. Joelâs money was meant to serve his pleasure, not yours. Letting him take you any other way seemed to blur the lines between transaction and affection, and though youâd done this before, it still didnât feel right. You couldnât bear having his focus here.
Evidently, though, he could. Heâd snatched your vibrator from the night table and lowered his torso to your legs, lips twitching the tiniest bit. âOpen up. Let me see her.â
Joel was on his stomach, eyes glowing with intrigue.
âLet me see how much sheâs missed me, baby.â
The grey matter in your brain mightâve trickled through your earsâthe whole thing went to mush at his words. You pushed at his hands, then the top of his head, but clearly, your will was weak. You wanted this. Needed it.
âThatâs a good girl. Let daddy have it,â Joel drawled.
You wanted to cry. Or maybe hide. His index and middle fingers prodded at your folds, pulling them apart, and for a moment, you couldâve sworn youâd stopped breathing. Joel kissed the slope of your mound with a quiet kind of reverence. The salt-and-pepper stubble on his chin brushed your clit, and your back arched reflexively. Then, remembering why youâd come to this arrangement in the first place, you felt a wave of guilt supplant that pleasure.
You clawed at his head and shook your own, weakly.
âNo. W-wanna make you feel good,â you choked out.
Not me.
Not here.
Just let itâ
âFuck,â you keened through your teeth. Joelâs lips made contact with your slick, drooling cunt and, in a second, sucked your nub in between them. He flicked his tongue.
Joel groaned, then pulled away to meet your gaze.
âFeels plenty good fâme,â he assured you in a murmur. Eyes glossy, âSheâs so fuckinâ sweet, honey. So pretty.â
Then, as if to punctuate his point, he slid his tongue down the whole wet mess of your slit, and he moaned. He curled the muscle and invaded your sticky, sensitive, precious warm flesh with vigor and forceâmaybe a little desperationâand you whined at the feeling. Your toes curled tight. It was doubtlessly a sight to see: Joelâs old and weathered head against your young and supple skin, the wiry greys of his chin rubbing your cunt like no manâs his age shouldâve been. He took you gently. Forked his fingers over your folds to hold you open for him and then, over and over and over again, just licking stripes. Squelching noises only seemed to goad him on while he buried his nose and savored your taste without reserve. Your stomach clenched with that pleasure, then swelled.
âThatâs my girlâso good for me,â Joel said, as though reminding you, gently, it was okay to relish the feeling.
Once more, he suckled your clit in his mouth, rubbing the tip of his tongue in a quick back-and-forth motion, and the next sensation hit without a breath of warning.
Your belly twisted again, then flushed with hot pleasure.
âMyâ fuck,â you cried, shuddering with a climax you didnât know was coming. You held his head and whined.
Joelâs tongue didnât stop. Your vision blurred. Whatever reprieve you mightâve hoped to find came in the form of his lips drawing back, momentarily, only to sponge little kisses on your still-pulsing heat. Your body jolted back.
âI câ Iâm done. Iâm done,â you blurted out.
Joel nodded against you. Humming through his kisses:
âI know. Keep going.â
Keep going.
So simple.
Still, you couldnât breathe. Your sight was inundated with stars. You felt Joelâs stubble on your slit again, only this time, the pleasure was tripled. Your legs trembled, and your hands made fists in his hair. Joel kept on kissing.
And kissed again, again, and again, until your fingers in his locks pulled taut to the roots and your hips were bucking up in his face: âToo much, tâoh fuckfuckfuck.â
Then came a buzz. Skirting your legs in a blink, before diving to meet Joelâs mouth on your clit. You shrieked.
âI know, I know,â Joel joined, as though soothing a wound while he maneuvered the vibrator. Lifting his head and then kissing your thigh, âI know. Youâre alright.â
You wanted to sob; you felt ready to burst. You trusted Joelâs judgment but had never been subjected to this sort of pleasure. What if it was more than you could take?
âIâm here.â
Joelâs words were slow to crawl off his tongue, but their intent was clear. You writhed once more, and he was kissing your skin, rubbing your thighs, and taking the toy to your clit with a warm, devoted touch. He wasnât cruel.
He had a glint in his gaze when you met it, like he knew you wouldnât accept this feeling aloneâbut he wanted you to. He wanted the indulgence to be your own and an end in itself. There was care in his touch, tender praise with every caress, and you guessed this was intentional. Joel needed you to know this was more than only his.
You felt more naked than youâd ever been: soaking the sheets with your last release, fresh arousal trickling out, Joelâs spit mixing with your nectar and sweat and pressing you down in the bed. And nudging you, gently.
ââSâokay, baby. Youâre alright. That feels nice, doesnât iââ
âKiss me.â
It came out faster than you could even try and stop it. You werenât sure why you said it. The words were acerbic on your tongueâyou hated ever sounding needyâbut then your mind and your mouth and your worries were all silenced at once when Joel came clambering up for you.
His lips were wet and grinning as he kissed you. He held the vibrator hostage between your legs while his body pressed tight against yours. His movements slowed.
Then, as if heâd crawled in your head and read your mind:
âItâs okay to need me, baby. Itâs okay to want this.â
His hips made that assurance even clearer. Joel reached down and took the vibrator again, increasing the friction between your groin and his while he pressed the buzzing toy to your clit. You whined into his mouth at the feeling.
Your eyes rolled back, and the pleasure soared. This morning, you mightâve bristled at the words heâd just spoken, but here, in this bed, it felt okay. It felt safe.
Joel felt safe, for once, and you werenât sure how to keep that idea from stickingâhow to reconcile the notion of swapping sex for cash with a man for months on end, and then this. Your stomach churned. He held your face and kissed you more, and your clit throbbed and ached. Before you could ponder your thoughts a second longer, a white-hot pleasure washed over, and you came again.
âGood girl,â Joel cooed.
Throbbing even more this time.
âThatâs a sweet girl. Thatâs my baby.â
All but aching with desire. Feeling it double.
âCum for daddy, thatâs it. Keep going.â
Feeling it trickle down your legs.
âSheâs feelinâ real good, huh?â
You could barely breathe.
You whined. Felt something splinter between your thighs and then more of it, more of you and that slick, oozing pleasure and Joelâs groans, overjoyedââMaking a fucking messâa daddy, isnât she? She feel that good?ââand by âthat goodâ you guessed it was more than normal.
This was more warmth than usual. Somewhere in the midst of your own mind-numbing pleasure, youâd let out a spurt, sticky and wet. It now coated the hairs on Joelâs tummy, and while his skin shone, his eyes were brighter. He flitted a look to you, gaze flaring, and slid down. Low.
Back to where he was before. Moving the buzzing pink bullet aside and letting his mouth assume its place.
Of course, you yelped.
âJoel!â
You winced, both from saying his name and feeling so raw. Joel grinned at the sound and suckled your clit.
It was drenched. You and Joel, too, were doused all over and practically gleaming under the rays of late afternoon sun then pouring through the window. For a second, you cast a look outside like you had before, but it was only to brace your body for the bliss at hand. You stared and felt a crude, carnal shockwave seize you head to toe. It traveled fast and made you release, again, or else just continue the same flow as beforeâand this time, into Joelâs waiting mouth. He lapped at you feverishly now.
He squeezed your legs and licked you dry. He worked in merciless circles, like his life might have depended on making you stay at this peak. All the while, you were tearing at his hair. Riding his face as your body fell apart.
That was alright. This pleasure was yours for now, but there was still time yet to make it worth his while, you reasoned in a half-intoxicated state. Your legs vibrated as you started to crawlâlimpâback up in the bed and, numb with elation and a desperate need to please, you stretched your arm toward the night stand. You huffed.
You reached blindly but got it. The box. Weak fingers found the first plastic strip and tore yourself a square. Then, lifting it to Joel, you ignored the last stabs of pleasure between your legs. This was fun, but still his.
âGo on,â you told him, breathless, âFuck me.â
Joel quirked a brow. He took the condom, still panting himself. He brought the latex to his tip out of habit, then:
âYeah? Are you sure?â
âUh-huh.â
Your head was swimming. Somewhere entrenched in the furthest recesses of your brain you could feel it, that dizzying, self-centered pleasure. You pushed it back.
You suffocated it, and you spread your legs wide for him. You let him lay you down and tug the rubber over his cock, then nudge at your hips to situate himself in just the right way. How he liked it. He seemed to be content, and your heart swelled. In this airy, buoyant state, you felt more at ease to speak, sure that heâd understand.
âThis should cover some of it, right?â you panted out.
Joel slowed.
âWhat?â
You sucked your bottom lip between your teeth, eager to keep going. But you steeled yourself, just barely, then.
âSex. Now,â you said, âItâll cover some of my car repairs.â
Instead of nodding like youâd expected, Joel only blinked. Then you opened your mouth to speak again, and his body stopped you cold. He planted a hand beside your head on the pillow and raised his hips; you felt his heat leave with it. You reached for his backside immediately, to try and pull him back into that pre-missionary position heâd held, when Joel brushed you off. His face was hard.
âMoney?â he quipped.
âYeah,â you started, then remembered how you talked outside of the bedroom, when he seemed more serious, âWeâll go again. All week. You can even put it in myââ
Joel balked, like youâd just slapped him across the face.
âNo,â he said, sharp.
âNo,â he repeated, more to himself this second time. Almost as though he couldnât believe what you were suggestingâand making him guilty by association.
Joel clenched your pillow like a vice and shook his head.
âYouâre not getting paid for this,â he finished, and when your gaze penetrated his, confused, he squeezed harder.
âThought you wanted it.â Joel added, almost shamefully.
âI do! I doâŠI justââ you sputtered.
âWhat? Think you need to offer up a week and a half of fucking to make it worth my time? Is that what this is?â
Well, in a way, maybe.
You werenât sure what to say. Former dizzying bliss was dwindling fast, and now you were facing him cold. Sober.
Increasingly irritated, again.
âI just need money, Mr. Millerââ
âItâs Joel, hon,â he bit back, for the fourth time that day. His eyes flared with something more, maybe annoyance, but then he was tempering it just as fast. He ran a hand through his damp grey hair and shook his head, pausing, âItâs Joel. I know you need the money, baby, but itâsââ
âItâs what we agreed,â you protested, âWhat I needââ
âWell itâs not what I want!â Joel barked.
Anger surged again, and this time, evidently, the feeling was harder to keep at bay. He was scarcely able to rein in his features, settling on a grave little scowl instead of a frown, and he sucked in shorter, shallower breaths through his nose. You felt him let your pillow go.
âForget itâthe cash.â Joel grit his teeth even tighter, âForget these payments and the goddamn allowance Iâve had you on. I canât do that anymore. Itâs not right.â
Your heart sank.
You didnât know what to say.
Luckily, Joelâs voice resumed on its own.
âWhatever you want, whatever you need, sweetheartâŠâ
He stopped. Silence followed, then stretched on for one full, terrible minute. In that interim, you could see his chest rise and fall fast. He was trying to slow it down.
âWhatever you need paid off, Iâll do it. Anything. You donât have to touch me again. It was wrong of me to allow that in the first place,â he rejoined, tone cooling.
Sounding guilty, too.
Above you, Joel didnât seem keen on holding your gaze, so he fixed his stare someplace on the headboard instead. Then he moved off your body, slowly.
In spite of the distance he attempted to give, he was still crowding your space. Looming large and bare and weary as youâd ever seen him, knees shuffling back awkwardly through a mass of cotton sheets while his eyes shifted low. Away. The rest of him filled your lungs with a heady cologne scent and your stomach with a thousand tiny bladesâyou were hurt that he wasnât sticking to his end of the bargain. You were mad that he was trying to claim the moral high ground now, after everything youâd done.
Mostly, though, you were just upset that you felt like you were losing someone close. That Joel Miller was more of a confidant, friend, and father figure than your own dad had ever been, and that got all fucked up over money. Your lips pursed, and something stung behind your eyes when you reached for him again. Your throat stung, too.
âThe reason I agreed to do this,â Joel went on, and the ache in your head worsened when he winced from your touch, âwas âcause I didnât want you getting âhelpâ from anyone else. I was selfish. And thatâs not an excuseâŠâ
He started to move off, hand dropping from yours.
ââŠbut itâs the truth. Iâm sorry.â
At length, Joel found your gaze, and the eyes said it all over again: Iâm sorry. You mightâve believed them, too.
But you were you, and you couldnât help but press:
âWhy?â
Your voice was small. Joel was trying to stand from the bed, but you grabbed at his hand again and made him meet your eyes. Confusion was painted across his own.
Kneeling in front of him, curious, you tried to clarify.
âWhyâd it have to be you?â
Judging from Joelâs expression as soon as you did, you got the sense that this question made him feel dumb. He frowned, but he held your stare and answered anyway.
âBecause I wanted you first,â he replied, âBefore all this.â
Your stomach twisted. He did?
You didnât need to ask twice to know what that meant. What heâd said, in words and with a look, was enough. Still, it was always in you to know more, to be sure, so you crept a little closer. You let your hands roam up andâ
âNo,â Joel said, as soon as your fingers reached his side.
Youâd just wanted to feel him, maybe prod him further on what heâd just said through acts that didnât require verbal articulation, but he refused. He backed up in bed.
âThis isnât aboutââ he started, low.
âSex. I know,â you answered for him. Then your touch grazed his thigh, and you were dying to have more. To be told in a way you both knew and understood. To touch, âYou want me to believe you reallyâŠliked me before?â
âMore than you know.â
There was that blunt, open pragmatism in the Joel youâd always known. Perhaps guided by natural inclinations, or else your hand on his leg, drawing higher. Moving closer.
Showing skepticism through your eyes and the hint of a playful, disbelieving smile starting to curl at your lips.
âWhen you met me?â you teased.
Youâd known of Joel for years, and had met him a couple times as a teenager at various firm holiday functions. You probably hadnât exchanged more than ten words altogether before starting law school a few years back.
âHell no,â Joel answered, fast, âWhen you started work.â
His gaze was timid again. It was fixed on his thigh where youâd started to slide your index up the warm, muscled expanse of his skin, and though you could tell he was more than hesitant, you wanted to know. Wanted to feel.
It wasnât so easy convincing a man youâd been working forâand fucking, largely without feelingâto pay bills that you wanted him here and now. But you needed to try.
That maybe, somewhere along the way, youâd come to want him, too. That cash wasnât the only thing at stake.
You crawled between his legs, then straddled his hips.
Your lips smiling still as you did: âHow much?â
Joel blinked back. Dazed.
âWhat do you mââ
âHow much did you like me? When did it start?â
Joel sighed when your heat rubbed his. He tried grabbing ahold of your hips, when you glanced down and saw heâd already discarded the last condom. You couldnât have that if you wanted to continue this talk.
You reached back and grabbed another.
âDarlinâ,â Joel said, strained, âWe shouldnâtâŠâ
âSays who?â
Youâd already worked the rubber halfway down his length when his heavy-lidded gaze locked with yours. You saw lust there, mixed with worry. Curiosity. You kept going.
âSays your dad, if he ever finds out what Iâve done to his little girl,â Joel replied, closing his eyes at the feeling.
You had the latex worked down to the base of him when you smiled. Felt him seize your hips, lids fluttering open to find you in their soft, glossy stare, and you felt better. Like clockwork, you went together and joined, at last. You felt Joel squeeze your backside and groan when you first sank down to take him whole. You shuddered, too.
But you tried to steady your voice as you spoke.
âSemantics, Miller,â you told him, only faltering a little, âThings you are âdoingâ to his little girl. Not just âdone.ââ
There, you had a point. Surely your father would have had some choice words for his business partner and best friend if he knew how far Joelâs cock was currently stuffed inside your tight, wet cunt. It might even piss him off, if he werenât too drunk to receive the news himself.
Joel blinked hard, signaling that he knew this too, and presently watched your body swallow all eight inches at once, after youâd raised yourself up to just the tip and sank back. Your ass fell to his groin with an obscene sort of squelch, and your walls involuntarily clenched. You both let out sounds of pleasure, and held on tighter.
Your hands on his chest for stability, while one of his own held your hip and the other fumbled around for your clit, gliding through the sheen of your arousal on his front. You rocked your hips and felt how much it really wasâhow youâd drenched his whole abdomen with your last release. You smiled at this and stared, pleased with the pretty, sticky display youâd laid bare all over Joelâs belly.
When Joel wasnât watching you ride, he stared there too.
âNot so âlittleâ anymore,â he mused quietly. Then he looked up to find your eyes, seeing them as glazed as his, âAnd I âlikeâ you, hon. Present tense. Not justâŠâliked.ââ
Alright.
âHow much?â
You wanted to say it with some confidence. Nonchalance. Then Joelâs cock nicked a particularly sensitive ridge inside your walls, and that thought was gone as quick as it had come. You gripped the flesh of his upper chest and rolled your hips harder. Let out your breaths in little fractured whimpers while you rode him more. Another sweet feeling twisted low in your gut.
With just a glimpse of that, Joel moved his hand from your heat up past your hips and waist, to squeeze one of your breasts. His fingers were wet. You could feel them, equal parts warmth and wanton yearning as the pads pinched your nipple and gave it a firm tug. He grunted.
Clearly, there was more to it than just the touching and feeling for himâJoelâs eyes drank in the sight of your skin as it glistened with the arousal heâd just smeared. He thumbed at the wet, stiff peak and swallowed. And, just as you were about to adjust the rhythm of your hips bouncing on him, his free hand joined the first and pulled you down. You cried feeling his cock wedge deep; your hands fell to either side of his body when he yanked your face down to his. He fucked up into you from underneath
You squealed, soft, âJoel!â
He kissed your open mouth. Made you lay flat overtop him while he fucked your dripping hole. You whimpered.
âJoelââ Again.
âI like you so much, sweetheart,â he said, in answer to your last question, lips close, âDoes she like me too?â
As if to save him the trouble of a swift reply in words, your body told him instead. You squeezed around his cock, and with another desperate cry, bit his shoulder. He hammered your poor, aching pussy with a groan of his own, and he held your body down to his. Grinning.
Kissing the side of your head while he pounded away. Stroking your hair, âIs that a âyesâ? She like her daddy?â
Drool was bound to slip out of your mouth any second. Your lips were locked in a permanent âoâ while he drilled from under you on the bed. Still, you managed to nod.
âUh-huhâoh, fuck, fuck, da-ddy. Yes, daddy.â
You squeezed your eyes shut as another blistering wave seared your insides. Joel was relentless with his thrusts now, driving himself in and out without stopping or slowing. He mustâve known you were close. He was too, judging by the sounds of his grunts and hushed tone.
âLet daddy take care of her then, baby. All of her. OK?â
His words trickled through your ear as sweet as honey. His cock was less kind, but that was okayâyou liked it.
You loved him here. Taking care of you. Her. Everything.
And, in this half-coherent state of fuckdrunk pleasure, you were tempted to give in to whatever he begged.
It would be so easy. Joel cradled your face in his hand, practically beaming with pride while he fucked you over and over, and your legs were spread, walls were stretched, eyes practically rolling back, and you felt more secure than youâd been in ages. Joel could care for you.
He rubbed his thumb over your cheek and hummed.
âDaddyâs got you,â he said, voice all warm assurance.
Nudging you closer and closer to your peakâand perhaps some other form of surrender. Release.
Submission?
Joel wouldnât be so bad for that.
He could fuck you well and leave you content. Make you forget what it meant to be strapped for cash and saddled with guilt and worry over bills every month. Joel could provide, for now. His eyes said as much; his fingers threaded through your hair and rubbed your scalp. He cupped your face, all fifty-six years in his own looking as handsome as theyâd ever been. He felt good. He felt safe.
You were hot. Your legs trembled and ached.
âIs that something youâd want?â he pressed.
And, still holding Joelâs gaze with a heavy-lidded, fucked out look of your own, you surprised yourself by nodding, slowly. Your body was spent, but the curve on your lips, then his, was sincere; Joel nodded back as he grinned.
âYeah? You mean it, sweetheart?â
He flipped you both over and got on top, never breaking apart. You wound your legs around his back and let him cup your cheeks again, and from this angle, you felt it. You wouldnât try and fight it now; you just kissed him.
Then you came for a third time, walls clenching and squeezing and gushing again, smearing Joelâs front as he fucked you right through it. His groans were a little more subdued than yours, but in their timbre, you could hear his desperation. He emptied himself inside you, in the condom, and kept holding your face all the while.
You felt a low pulse between your legs. Then another. And another. And another. Joelâs hips began to still, his hefty greying belly bumping lightly against your skin while he drained what was left in his balls, and you swore that his bones mightâve creaked from the sheer force of those final thrusts. He seemed exhausted. Somehow, though, the man looked even better in this stateâhaggard and worn as he was, the face above your own was soft. Smiling, faintly, and kissing you constantly.
You couldnât pretend you didnât enjoy it; you were far too tired and fucked out of your mind to protest right now.
Joel trailed a path with his lips from your chin to your ear. He kissed the hinge of your jaw and sank himself deeper.
âMr.ââ But you caught yourself, shortly, ââŠJoel.â
He lifted his head, not apologetic in the least.
âMaybe just one moreââ he started.
âNo,â you finished for him, sharp.
Still smiling, but with your eyes on him in a thinly veiled threat. Joel accepted that and kept his dick where it was.
What followed was gradual but natural enough. A little awkward as you broached that uncharted territory of remaining in the otherâs presence after the deed was done, but Joel didnât seem like he wanted to leave the bed, and you had nowhere else to go until dinner with your dad at eight. There was a moment you wanted to separate your body from Joelâs, if only to slip off to the bathroom by yourself, but the man just held you closer.
âYou think your old man will mind if I joined tonight?â
Here the fuck we go.
âHeâll kill you.â
You pushed hard against his hold without getting so much as an inch of give. Joel had to fight back a chuckle.
âOh, yeah? Why?â
âBecause,â you began in a huff. Wriggling with very little success in his arms, while you were pinned in missionary, âI smell like you. You smell like me. My dadâs a drunk, but he can sniff stuff like that out in a heartbeat. Too risky.â
You punctuated those words with a still more serious look, but before you could nudge at his chest again or say something more, you were forced to swallow a scream. Joelâs grip tightened even more, and he moved to stand up from the bedâwith you still in his arms and impaled on his cock. He started to walk to the bathroom.
âGreat. Showerâs got plenty of room for the two of us.â
âJoel!â
âGlad I donât have to keep reminding you of my name.â
His voice was smug. Your gaze was hard. Joel was still hard himself, amazingly, and you almost groaned when you felt the head of his cock bump somewhere soft and sensitive inside. He toted you into the big, bright room.
âIf not tonight, how âbout tomorrow? Just you and me.â
He would never stop this shit. He reached for the faucet.
âStill too dangerous. You know that,â you chided. Your resolve only wavered a little when you felt the hot water start to pelt at your back. Joel closed the glass door, âBesidesâŠI need to focus on figuring my shit out right now. Work and bills and getting myself a rental car soon.â
Joel paused. He turned, still holding you.
Then, just as swiftly as heâd stepped inside, he carried you right back out of the shower. You whined in protest.
He took you over to the bed and set you down. He left to find his wallet and keys. You mightâve been tempted to voice your displeasure in some other wayânamely, by marching back to the bathroom, locking the door, and bathing aloneâbut before you could speak a word, Joel was back. He looked down at you and held out his fist.
âWhatâsââ
âYour dad and meâll be up to our eyeballs in bullshit working the Garcia audit tomorrowâand I know you donât want him seeing us leave together anywhereâso we can meet at Bohananâs at six. How does that sound?â
You blinked.
âI donâtâŠhave a car.â
Joel opened his hand. Keys dropped out.
In a single glance, you could see they werenât his.
Joel drove a garish Super Duty F-450, not an Audi. The cogs were quick to turn in your head, but clearly not fast enough, because Joel was closing your fingers over the keys before you could breathe so much as a syllable to him. When you did, it came out more like a stutter. Palpably mad but far too rattled to get much out:
âJoel, I-I canâtââ
âIâve been meaning to buy one anywââ
âYouâre insane,â you started to push the keys back, and for some reason, your heart was thudding extra hard as you did. You went on, unblinking, âYou donâtâŠneed to.â
âI want to.â
Joelâs hands were warm when he pressed both of his palms to secure yours between them. He could probably feel the way it shook a little, but he didnât seem to care. His gaze was too busy trying to find, and hold, your own while you swallowed and stared and racked your numb brain for any words of defiance. At length, nothing came.
All you could do was meet that look. In the soft brown irises above, you could see it allâthe need to comfort, and care, and provide where he could, offer better than the hand youâd been dealt and maybe, interspersed with those feelings somewhere, a simpler need in him to give.
For once, you wanted to believe it.
Fun fact: This fic was inspired by true eventsâŒïžđŻ My life đ«đ€Șđ€đ Like reader, my truck is also busted as SHIT and needs $2,700 in repairs!!!! Unlike reader, I will not be sucking and fucking Joel Miller to recoup my losses (not asking for donations, just wanted to give yâall a giggle at my misfortune LOL)
#ENOUGH BULLSHITTING WE NEED MORE GLUCOSE GUARDIAN JOEL ON THE TL NEOWWWWW#đ«”đŒđ#iâm begging yâall to write more for this very particular and off-putting dynamic bc i love it dearly#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller tlou#the last of us fic
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jump then fall (into you) | part 1
banner by the talented @jimilterâ đ
pairing â jungkook x reader
genre â cruise AU, fake dating AU, best friends to lovers AU | fluff, angst, smut
word count â 52k (split into 3 parts | pt 1. 24k)
18+ | warnings â swearing, drinking, sexual content: foreplay, oral m. and f., nipple play, protected sex etc.
summary â bringing Jungkook along as your date to your exâs lavish cruise wedding seemed like a perfect idea at first â all of your family and close friends together, nothing can go wrong⊠then Jungkookâs ex shows up and all of a sudden youâre in a years long relationship with him. You donât mind though, really, how hard can sharing a cabin and pretending to be deeply in love with your best friend really be?
note. i'm backkkkk...?! with a disclaimer too:
Iâve been writing this on and off for pretty much two years so 1. it's not proofread bc i have not got the attention span to do that for 50k+ and I never got to read over what I previously wrote before working on it again so it might be a bit mismatchedâŠ? 2. I canât say Iâm hugely happy with this fic because it wasnât a continuous workflow, it just doesnât match the standards I have for myself but i tried and Iâll do better for the next ones which Iâm excited about ;)
please interact and tell me how you find it! <3 it's been forever and i've missed you all đ„ș
due to tumblr text post limitations, Iâve had to publish in three parts â links for part 2 + 3 can be found at the end.
 â  a part of the seven seas collab hosted by the wonderful yannie @ressjeon đđ„° two years late but I made it :â)
part 1
âGosh, Y/N, itâs a three week trip, youâre not going for a year!âÂ
The frustration in Jungkookâs voice has you whipping around, a pair of Valentinoâs in one hand, Manoloâs in the other. âItâs Alexâs wedding cruise, Jungkook. Everyone and their parents are going to be there, mine included!âÂ
âNot mine!â he huffs, putting the last of your swimsuits into the suitcase open in front of him. You donât blame him for being so frustrated, after all, he has been folding your clothes for the last hour while his single suitcase sits ready to go downstairs in the foyer.Â
âActually in case youâve forgotten,â you start, stepping carefully through the piles of clothes in your massive closet to go towards him, âmy mom has fed and even bathed you once after that time you wet yourself, so technically sheâs as good as yours too.â
âThat was one time, and I barely even remember it so it doesnât count.â
âI do,â you smile, coming to stop in front of him.Â
He sighs, looking down at the stilettos youâre holding. âWeâve been packing for hours already, you shouldâve done this nights ago if it was gonna take this long.â
Now itâs you whoâs sighing. âItâs been an hour not hours, besides weâre almost done now.â
Jungkook arches his brow, folding his arms in front of him. âThen whatâre all your clothes doing on the floor?â
âThey just need to go in one of the suitcases,â you smile. âSee, weâre almost done.â
Unconvinced, Jungkook looks around at the mess but eventually nods. âFine, but you can finish yourself, Iâm going to eatââ
âNo, wait, you canât leave me!â you exclaim, reaching for Jungkook as your eyes go wide as a doe.
Telltale traces of a smile on Jungkookâs features let you know he was expecting this. He looks down at you, a loose curl hanging over his forehead. There was once a time when you were the taller one, but that only lasted a few years before Jungkook got in a good few inches between you.Â
Both of you were just turning six when you first met although it always felt like Jungkook was a little younger to you in the first few years of your friendship, probably because of his naturally introverted nature which he more often steps out of when he feels comfortable to do so. But back then, he was just a wide eyed six year old who hid behind his mother as she came to work on her first day at the estate you call home.Â
Knowing Jungkook was the same age as you and from a single parent household, your mom suggested that he could stay with you instead of his mom needing to hire someone to look after him while she worked. That was probably one of the best things that ever happened to the both of you. Jungkook became a better friend to you than many of those at your private school full of elementary school kids who wished they were ten years older than they were, and as the years went on there was nothing you didnât do together.Â
Naturally, your family got to know Jungkook well and being the little smartass heâs always been, Jungkook impressed your father so much that he helped him to apply for a scholarship position as you moved into high school. Of course Jungkook got in, and though it was only a partial scholarship, your father insisted on paying the rest of his fees which his mother found hard to accept but Jungkook promised your father to pay him back in the future. Fast forward a little more than a decade and Jungkook has paid back all of the fees thanks to being CEO of an affluent software company developed from his love of gaming.Â
He struggles to fight his smile and you can see heâs contemplating going down or not, having to choose between food or you. âWhat do you even need me for?â he asks, taking the smallest step closer, so small you donât even notice.Â
âFashion advice?â you shrug, keeping an iron-like grip on his arms.Â
He narrows his eyes. âYou told me my fashion style is shit.â
âWas,â you correct, sliding your hands up his arms and down his chest with a satisfied smile. âNow is different though, Iâve rubbed off on you.â You glance down at his figure too, checking out his outfit.Â
Jungkook chuckles as he follows your gaze. âWhy would you need my help when you have yourself then, hm?â
Pouting at him, your arms slip around his waist and squeeze him in a hug. âYouâre Mr Muscle, who else is gonna help me carry all this stuff?â
He pouts back sarcastically. âIs princess gonna break a heel if she carries her own suitcase?â
As you shrug, your brows remain furrowed. âMaybe, or a nail,â you say, letting one hand off his waist to show off a fresh manicure. As you wiggle your fingers ahead of him, he breaks into a smile.Â
âYou know you have a bunch of dudes in suits downstairs, just waiting to help you with this stuff. Iâm pretty sure itâs their job.âÂ
âYes, but they donât give me fashion advice like you do,â you respond with a cheeky wink.
Jungkook takes the heels youâre holding off of you. âHereâs some advice â pack light.â He throws the heels behind him somewhere in your closet, earning a frown from you as your eyes follow where they land in the middle of your blown out closet.Â
âFine,â you sigh, looking back up at him. âIâll lose the heels if you promise youâll stay with me now.â
As a small smile grows on his lips, Jungkookâs arms find their way around your waist too. âOnly if you promise youâll make me a sandwich before we go?â His smile grows knowingly as he gives in to your charm â youâve always found itâs easy to encourage Jungkook to go along with whatever you want, he just canât seem to say no to you.Â
âPB and J?â you ask with a smile that matches his.
He nods once, eyes shimmering as he still gazes at you.Â
âOf all the foods you could ask for, itâs always PB and J,â you laugh.
He shrugs, letting go as you move to finish packing. âThereâs nothing else I want.â
Arching a brow, you throw a few pairs of linen pants towards one of the suitcases in your closet. âWe literally have a live-in chef, you know, Frederico, the guy you have a secret handshake with?â
âYes, what of him?â Jungkook says huffing.Â
âAnd you still want PB and J when he can make you anything?â
Jungkook steps towards your suitcase and picks up a pair of pants to roll. âI know that, but I just need some food in me and quick, so the simple option is best.â
Stepping forward, you take the pants off of him and roll them yourself. âIf you would be patient enough to wait a few more minutes then you could have a sandwich thatâll fill you up for longer than half an hour.â
âAnd if you didnât have more clothes than half the country combined then we would probably already be on our way to the airport,â Jungkook responds sassily, cocking his head.
âDonât get smart with me or I wonât make your sandwich,â you sass back.
âIâll just ask Freddie to make it for me and you donât get Mr Muscle.â
Grumbling, you shove the rolled pants back into his hands as he laughs, taking them to place in one of the open suitcases. Not long after, all of your suitcases are packed and in the car, ready to go.Â
The drive to the airport takes a little under an hour and upon arriving, the car takes you straight to the jet. Apparently you did take a little too long packing as your mom so pointedly lets you know after arriving, but luckily for you thereâs a few others missing from the families youâre taking the jet with. With time to kill, Jungkook and you have a few idle chats with the others, most of whom you went to school with so the conversation comes easily but eventually you settle into the seats opposite your parents.Â
âHow was your drive here, darling?â your mom asks while closing her bag after a little skin TLC.Â
âIt was fine,â you answer, pulling out your own bag full of the skincare you deemed necessary to carry for the plane trip.Â
âAnd how did you find it, Jungkook?âÂ
Jungkook shrugs. âIt was good.â
âLovely,â she smiles. âItâs going to be a wonderful trip.â
From beside her, your dad sighs, putting away his tablet. âDo we know how long the flight is to Marbella?â
âOh, honey,â your mom frowns disapprovingly. âDonât be such a grumpy lump before weâre even in the air.â
Jokingly, your father looks at Jungkook and you, and then gives your mom a side eye. âI just had a few important meetings that Chris accidentally scheduled for today so Iâm wondering if I could still make them online.â
Dismissively, your mom waves her hand. âNo work talk, weâre here to enjoy ourselves.â
âAlright, youâre right,â your dad concedes. âMaybe to start we could get a few drinks then, eh?â He raises his brow at Jungkook who approves with a big smile and both of them flag down a flight attendant.Â
Once thereâs a drink in everyoneâs hand, your parents settle into conversation with Jungkook and you.Â
âSo are you excited to see Alex, Y/N?â your father asks.Â
âAbsolutely,â you smile. âThough I think Iâm more excited to see Sophia and Alias, itâs been a long time since Iâve gotten to spend time with them.â
âOh, Jungkook, you must be excited to see Sophia too,â your mom says with a bit of a cheeky smile.
Jungkook chuckles nervously, glancing at you though youâre sporting the same smile as your mother. âI mean, yeah, weâre good friends.â
âWell if you werenât, things would be pretty awkward,â your dad laughs before helping himself to some food he ordered with the drinks.Â
âYeah,â Jungkook mutters, managing a small laugh.
âOh come on, guys,â you laugh, nudging him. âSheâs happy youâre coming too.â
He nods appreciatively before taking a sip of his drink. âItâs her parents Iâm more worried about.â
At this, your mom laughs too. âOh, Leon and Helena love you really, dear, itâs all just for a laugh.â She leans forwards and squeezes his hand with her usual tender smile. âThough if it really bothers you, we could have a word with them, without letting on itâs coming from you of course.â
Smiling, Jungkook shakes his head. âThanks, thatâs really sweet of you but itâs alright, I can take the daggers I get from them,â he chuckles. âAfter all, what I did was pretty awful.â
âYou were sixteen,â you say, patting on the last of your moisturiser.Â
He shrugs. âI know, but sheâs their little princess.â He looks across at you and then glances at your parents. âItâs like someone doing that to you, your parents would be mad.âÂ
At that, your father hums in agreement.
âHeck, Iâd be mad,â Jungkook adds.Â
Looking at him, he shrugs again and smiles. Before you can say anything, he carries on. âSixteen or not, I literally left Sophia on one of the most important nights of her life.â
âYeah, it was pretty awful at the time,â you sigh, remembering the night as clear as day.
Almost ten years ago now, the night of both yours and Sophiaâs entry into society, the debutante ball. For you, the night was a bit of a blur with it being the first night Alex and you made things official in your relationship, sealing it with a first kiss and many more that evening. It was a magical and whimsical night, and although Alex and you didnât last, your love for each other still remains as best friends and you couldnât be happier for him getting married to his dream girl now.Â
For Sophia, the night went a little differently... She'd had a crush on Jungkook for a while since, being Alexâs younger sister, sheâd seen him often with you. After he found out, he asked her to be her escort to the ball. She of course said yes and everything seemed to be going perfectly until the moment Jungkook was supposed to escort her down the stairs but he had completely disappeared. Sophia was left all alone and completely embarrassed, even after Alias, the ever caring older brother, stepped in and acted as her escort. Jungkook still hasnât told you the reason he left so abruptly that night. All you remember is not being able to reach him the whole weekend, even when you tried going to his house he was never home. When you finally saw him, he told you he didnât want to talk about it so you didnât.Â
Of course, everyone else forgot about the incident and even Sophia forgave him after he apologised profusely and endlessly, but Mr and Mrs Cirillo were less forgiving for a while, but after many years itâs just become a joke between them. The fact that heâs invited on the cruise just shows itâs all in the past now.Â
However that doesnât mean Mr and Mrs Cirillo ever pass up an opportunity to remind him of the pastâŠÂ
âItâs lovely to see you, Y/N, dear,â Mrs Cirillo says, bringing you in for a hug.Â
Mr Cirillo stands behind her, taking your hand as soon as his wife lets go. âHow was the flight here?â
âIt was good, I slept for most of it really.â Stepping away, you turn to look at Jungkook as he approaches them with a meek smile.
Mrs Cirillo smiles back, her words carrying a playful lilt. âThere he is, the heartbreaker.â
Jungkook lowers his head at that and you can see his nose scrunching a little. âThatâs me, unfortunately,â he says, stepping into Mrs Cirilloâs arms for a brief hug.Â
When he takes Mr Cirilloâs hand to shake, the older man shows the same playfulness as his wife. âNice to see you again, Jungkook. My favourite and least favourite man on board.âÂ
Jungkook chuckles and Mr Cirillo pulls him in for a hug. âStay out of trouble, yes?âÂ
âOf course,â Jungkook smiles, stepping away to stand next to you as your parents walk out onto the main deck.
Their eyes light up as the old friends all greet each other and you take Jungkookâs hand and slip away together before you get roped into a conversation.Â
âYou alright?â you ask casually as you scan the people all on the deck.
âGood, thanks,â he responds with a gentle squeeze of your hand. He knows that you know how he finds it a little tedious sometimes every time Sophiaâs parents mention the past, but he knows he messed up so he doesnât ever complain about it. In a way, it annoys you when the Cirilloâs always mention it but you know itâs not your place to say anything, especially if Jungkook hasnât said anything.Â
Looking around, you take in many of the familiar faces while scanning the crowds for Alex or one of his siblings. Thereâs no unfamiliar faces on this part of the deck, and seeing all the waiters walking around offering canapĂ©s and drinks, you realise the Cirilloâs mustâve rented out this part of the deck. The excited buzz amongst everyone extends to you as you turn to look out past the balcony towards the sea, stepping towards it and taking Jungkook with you.Â
Taking a deep breath of the fresh sea, enjoying the warmth glowing from the sun as a steady breeze blows. Exhaling, you turn around to Jungkook beaming.Â
It seems like he was already watching you, waiting as though he knows youâre gonna say something now. Seeing you smile, his corner of his lips turn too. âItâs pretty, isnât it?â
âVery,â you nod, turning around to look out again, lowering the sunglasses from your head to stop from squinting.Â
âY/N!â A familiar voice calls your name and you turn around, breaking into the biggest smile when you see Alex approaching, his arms outstretched. âJungkook!âÂ
You meet him halfway, excitedly skipping into his hug. He hugs you tight, releasing a sigh as he lets go and hugs Jungkook. âGosh, itâs been so bloody long, Iâve missed you guys.âÂ
âMissed you more, buddy,â Jungkook smiles, patting Alexâs back before he lets go. âCongrats on the wedding too, weâre well excited to be here for you.â
Alex laughs, flashing his perfect pearly smile. âHonestly, Iâm happier to have you guys here. Half of the people here havenât even spoken to me in years.â He glances around before adding, âyou know how it is.âÂ
âMhm,â you nod, squeezing his arm. âYouâve got us though, weâre here for you every step of the way.âÂ
âThanks,â he responds, taking two drinks from a passing waiter to give to you both. âYou were allowed plus ones though, when do I get to meet them?â He looks across at both of you expectantly, though you see a subtle raise of his brow matched with a small smile that seems to hint he already knows the answer.
âWell, we didnât really get the chance to ask anyone,â Jungkook answers, looking sideways at you. âSo we just thought weâd come with each other.â
âAh.â The smile on Alexâs lips grows. âWhy am I not surprised?â
âBecause you know how busy weâve both been,â you say, shrugging lightly before taking a long sip of your drink.
âHm, thatâs it,â Alex says quietly.Â
âBOO!â Large hands tap your shoulders before the man himself jumps in front of you.Â
âAlias,â you squeal excitedly, returning the hug heâs already given you. Slightly more wild albeit still as focused as his younger brother, Alias is the eldest of the Cirillo siblings and has become more of an older brother to you over the years.
âYou look like youâve grown,â he says, moving back and beaming as he pulls Jungkook in for a hug. âBoth of you.â
âWe literally saw you like a month ago,â Jungkook chuckles.Â
âReally?â Alias raises his brows in surprise. âDamn, you kids grow fast.âÂ
âI could say the same thing about that moustache of yours,â you say.Â
He smiles smugly. âLooks good right?â
Shrugging, you lean against the balcony. âI think you looked better without it.â
Alias frowns, hand coming up to stroke his moustache subconsciously. âReally?â he asks, looking at you in time to see you raising your glass to your lips to hide your smile.Â
âI knew you liked it,â he laughs. âApparently a lot of people do.â
âAh, Alias, no one wants to know,â Alex grimaces at his older brother.
Before Alias can defend himself, Jungkook says, âI do.â Alex and you both look at him and he shrugs. âMight grow mine out.â
Alias laughs, throwing his arm around Jungkookâs shoulder. âCâmon buddy, Iâll tell you all about it.â
As Alias pulls him away, Alex steps to stand next to you and both of you watch them walk away with Alias talking in a hushed tone as though no one else can find out.Â
As you watch them walk away with a fond smile on your face, Alex turns to you. âSo, how have you been?â
Still absentmindedly watching Jungkook and Alias, you hum. âGreat.â
âHowâs work?â
âMm, I actually just secured a deal with Park Motors last week.â
Glancing at Alex, you see his brows raise. âImpressive.â
âYeah, it was a pretty big win for the company and dad was proud of me.âÂ
Alex smiles. âAnd were you proud of yourself?â
As Jungkookâs head disappears from the crowd, you turn to face Alex too, taking another sip of your drink. âI know people think Iâm just riding off my parentâs success, which yeah, itâs true for the most part, but after doing this all myself I was pretty proud.â
âGood,â he grins. âYou should be. You may be one of the most princess-ed girls I know,â he adds with a teasing lilt, âbut youâre also one of the most hard working.â
Laughing, you nudge him lightly. âThanks, I appreciate it.â
âYouâre welcome.â He leans against the balcony too, pulling down his shades as he turns towards the sea where the sun shines down on the horizon. âWhat about things with Jungkook?â
Shrugging, you take a small sip. âHeâs good.â
Alex glances at you from the corner of his eye with the curve of his lips growing. âHm, anything else?â
Levelling his face, you break into a smile. âOh, Alex, youâre never gonna let this go are you?â
He smiles, shaking his head. âNot as long as I see itâs there.âÂ
Straightening your expression a little, you tilt your head. âBut thereâs nothing there.â
âY/N, thereâs everything there,â he says, matching your tone.Â
âAlex, come on,â you say quietly, traces of a smile returning.Â
He shrugs. âI make a perfectly valid point.â
Turning towards the deck again, you sigh. âI donât see it.â
âI do!â Alex almost exclaims excitedly. âAnd I have for the longest time.â Letting out a small laugh, he puts his arm around you and squeezes gently. âHis big doe eyes used to torture me all the time when I was dating you.â
You canât help but laugh at that. Jungkook does have doe eyes but you donât remember seeing them often while dating Alex.Â
âSeriously,â Alex says, fighting his case onwards. âI dated you for what, almost a year I think and Iâve never seen anyone sulk for that long.â
âHe wasnât sulking.â
âListen, Iâm almost a married man now, Y/N, and I can tell you all the looks of loveâŠâ
When you arch a brow quizzically, Alex sighs and continues. âThat boy was sulking for weeks because he hated seeing you with someone else.â
âOh come on, maybe he had a crush in the past but heâs a grown man now and has had plenty of his own romances.â
Now itâs Alex whoâs looking at you with his brow raised. âLike who?â
It takes you a moment to think of a name but a few still come to mind. âRemember Alia, the intern from my dad's company?â you ask rather smugly, although Alexâs reaction shows no surprise.Â
âThe girl who he went out with like five times.â
You shrug. âThat counts for something.
âIt really doesnât,â Alex says matter-of-factly. âAnyway, who else?â
âHmmm⊠ooh, Rachel, that super hot secretary!â
âY/N, that was a one night stand, it literally doesnât count.â
Sighing, you rack your memory for more, and then comes the answer. âValentina.â
Alex almost snorts, prompting you to frown at him.
âWhat?â you question. âThat was a real romance, there were feelings there.â
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Alex almost snorts again. âThe most real thing about that relationship was the Chopard watch Valentina tried to use to bribe Jungkook back to her.â
Wincing, you remember the finer details of that supposedly real romance. You turn back out to face the horizon, pulling your own shades down. âAlright, I guess I see your point.â
Gently pushing his point, Alex carries on. âNot to mention that I was your last serious relationship, which was how many years ago now?â
You simply shrug. âIâm not looking for anyone.â
Alex hums thoughtfully. âOr youâve already âfoundâ your someone.â This earns a glare from you but Alex ignores this. âHeâs practically your boyfriend already!âÂ
âIn what way?!â
âYou do almost everything together!â Alex exclaims back. âI wouldnât be surprised if youâve had sex already!âÂ
âAlex!â Something in your stomach curls unbidden at the thought. âWe havenât had sex!â you whisper hotly, glancing around to make sure no one heard.Â
âSorry,â Alex mumbles, looking over his shoulder too. Luckily thereâs no one nearby, everyone seems too busy engaging in their own excited conversations about the weeks to come.Â
Everything youâre hearing now isnât news to you, you know plenty of people have questioned the relationship between Jungkook and you, and you totally get why, but youâve been friends since such a young age and thatâs perfectly okay. Neither you nor Jungkook have made a move to take things further and maybe thatâs just how things are meant to stay, despite what Alex seems to think.Â
âAlso, what friend agrees to come on a 3 week long cruise for you, knowing full well my father doesnât miss a single opportunity to roast him.âÂ
âHereâs here for you, not me.â
âActually,â Alex raises a finger, âI invited him before you and he said he would meet us in Italy because things were busy with the company. I invited you after him, and the next thing I know is Jungkook is calling me telling me heâll be coming with you from the start.â
As your eyes narrow, you start to think of how that happened. After Alex invited you, you texted Jungkook straight away to ask if heâd come with you as a date to the wedding. As soon as he said yes, you started waffling on about how fun the trip was going to be and it mustâve been after that that Jungkook told Alex heâd come sooner than he previously planned.Â
âWell, any best friend would do that,â you say simply.Â
Alex pushes his lips out, brows raised. âIâm your best friend and I wouldnât do that for you.â
âHey!â You shove him hard but he barely moves.Â
âOh câmon, you wouldnât do it for me either.â Alex looks at you with a smile.Â
âYeah,â you relent. âI probably wouldnât unless you really needed me.â
Just then, you see Jungkook walking towards you, holding a platter of something. He simply beams when you frown at him in confusion.Â
From beside you, Alex raises his glass to his lips. âIâm telling you, the boy is whipped,â he says quietly before taking a sip.Â
Jungkook comes within ears width before you can say anything. âY/N, look,â he holds out the tray heâs holding, âthey have those little cracker things you like with capa, uh, capa-something.â He pushes it closer, gesturing for you to take one while looking pleased with himself.
Looking at the platter, your lips curl mindlessly into a smile. âCaponata,â you say, correcting him gently.Â
Itâs when Jungkook remembers the little things like this that his place in your heart grows and youâre grateful for having him as your best friend.Â
âYeah, thatâs the one,â he smiles. âHere, I got them for you.â
Your brows furrow together as you look down. âThe whole platter?â
âWell, yeah,â he says looking down too. âYou like them and Iâm sure thereâs more going around for everyone else.â
From beside you, Alex starts coughing and youâre more than certain you hear the word âwhippedâ coming out of his mouth. One glance at him proves youâre right as he raises his brows before looking away.Â
Jungkook, not having noticed the word Alex let slip, is eating one of the canapĂ©s before holding one out for you too. Smiling and thanking him, you take it.Â
âGood right?â Jungkook asks, his mouth full as you also eat one whole.Â
âSo good,â you mumble, brows furrowed as you keep eating.Â
Jungkook holds the tray towards Alex. âWant one?âÂ
âIâm good,â he smiles. âIâll leave you two to it though, Iâve still got some guests I need to greet.â His smile seems weary though you donât blame him, sometimes the supposed family friends in your circle donât seem very much like friends. After saying a temporary goodbye, he takes his leave, leaving Jungkook and you to continue devouring the canapĂ©s.Â
For a moment, youâre both quiet, save the sounds of pleasure from eating, then Jungkook speaks. âSophiaâs not coming with us by the way.â
Eyes wide, you turn to look at him. âWhat?!â you question, mouth half full.Â
Jungkook takes one glance at you and chuckles. His thumb comes up and wipes something close to your lips. âSheâs joining us later, from Nice.â
âOh.â Your lips turn into a pout. âWho am I gonna hang out with?âÂ
âYou-bo-me,â Jungkook says with his mouthful again. Â
âNo,â you sigh. âI donât got you. As soon as Alias is about, you and him turn into Tweedledum and Tweedledee.â
A small laugh escapes Jungkook's lips and you frown at him.
âIâm sorry,â he laughs again, placing the mostly empty tray down on a nearby table. âLook,â he takes your hands and squeezes them, âI promise Iâll stay with you, we can just hang out with Alias too.â
âYeah, I know,â you say looking up at him. âItâs fine though, you can hang out with whoever you want. You donât have to stay with me.â
Jungkook hides an amused smile. âIâll stay with you, we canât have our princess being alone,â he chuckles again, letting go of your hands to squeeze your cheeks.Â
âMm, my makeup,â you mumble, prying his fingers off your cheeks. âAnd you can stay with me if you really want to,â you shrug, hiding your smug expression.Â
Jungkook scoffs, laughing as you put your sunglasses back on. âI changed my mind.â
âHey!â you exclaim, and before you get another word out, Jungkook is laughing, wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you in.
âIâm joking, now letâs go say hi to the Morganâs, theyâve been looking this way since Alex was here.â
âTheyâre probably just judging us,â you grumble.Â
Jungkook smiles, turning you around and walking with you. âMore reason to say hello.â
Most of the first day is spent the same way, greeting some families who you like and some who you donât but at least you get to do it with a glass of champagne and Jungkook by your side. By the early evening, everyone is settling into their cabins and exploring the cruise ship which feels more like a palace.Â
Itâs well past midnight when Jungkook is walking you to your cabin which unfortunately is on another level to yours â Alex mentioned he couldnât get your cabins closer since Jungkook was supposed to be joining later.
âI am so ready to knockout,â you yawn, pulling out the keycard.
âMake sure you donât forget to take your makeup off,â Jungkook says as a gentle reminder.
Turning around at the threshold of your door, you look at him as he leans against the wall opposite. âI wonât, and you donât forget to shower, you still stink of chlorine.â
Jungkook chuckles quietly, careful not to disturb any of the neighbouring cabins who are most likely asleep. Alias and him decided it would be fun to cannonball into the deck pool during prohibited hours and subsequently ended up running away from some of the cruise crew and you just happened to be with them even though you refused to jump in because itâs breaking the rules.
âIâm making you join us next time,â he says.
âThatâs never gonna happen.â
Smiling slightly, Jungkook tilts his head. âThat sounds like a challenge.â
Laughing, you step out of your room towards him. âI wouldnât try, Jeon.â Raising your hand, you pinch his nose. âYouâll just fail.â
âOr,â Jungkook raises his brows, taking your hand into his, âit could be one of the best nights you spend here, plus running away is fun,â he grins.Â
âYou call that fun?â you laugh.Â
âTell me it wasn't.â
You shrug. âI have fun whenever I'm with you anyway.âÂ
Jungkook smiles, and so do you. Itâs not hard to be honest around him, it never has been. Thatâs probably why youâve been best friends for so long. âSo all the time?â he says.Â
âAll the time,â you repeat, laughing.Â
Lips still holding a gentle smile, Jungkook looks down at you and for a second you wait for him to say something but he doesn't say anything. Instead, he releases a small sigh and pulls you into a hug.Â
You feel your body relax in his embrace, the weariness of todayâs jet lag and socialising and cheeky antics slowly melting away as you breathe in the comforting smell of his cologne. Even though itâs tainted with chlorine, his arms around you seem to make it worth putting up with.Â
His hands slide up your back, patting you softly. âIâll see you in the morning, hm.â
âJust donât wake me up before noon,â you mumble.
He laughs, pulling away. âBreakfast ends at 11.â
Groaning, you step towards your door again. âI wish Freddie was with us.â
Chuckling quietly, he starts to make his way towards his cabin. âGood night, Y/N.â
âNight,â you wave, seeing him disappear from view as the door closes. You almost collapse onto your bed but manage to trudge to the bathroom to wash off your makeup and get into your pyjamas before finally sinking into bed and falling asleep.
Knock knock knock
Knock knock.
âY/N?"
Knock knock knock. âY/N!â
Grumbling, you pull your pillow over your head.
Thereâs a few more impatient knocks before you hear Jungkook. âCome on, or Iâm going down without you.â
âGo,â you groan, tossing in bed. âIâll eat later.â
Then you hear a series of whining outside the door. âIt's already almost 11, it's embarrassing going by myself you have to come with me, please.â
With one final groan, you force yourself out of bed and open the door. âI said not before noon, Koo.â
âPlease,â he says, lips forming an effortless pout. âIâm hungry.â
Well you canât say no now. Sighing, you step aside for him to come in. âGive me twenty minutes.â
Jungkook slumps onto your bed, already dressed casually in a white tee and black shorts. âYou have ten.â
With Jungkook rushing you, you meet halfway and manage to get ready in 15 minutes instead. It seems the Cirilloâs spared no expense and managed to keep an entire upper deck private for all of the meals served on sea days. Thereâs a breakfast buffet laid out inside but before you can even grab yourself a plate, you see your mom frowning at you from her seat outside. She raises her brows and points to her wrist, her not so subtle way of reminding you youâre late.
With a big smile, you mouth sorry and she just laughs to herself, shaking her head.Â
âY/N,â Jungkook calls your name. You look over at him and heâs already standing behind a few people up for seconds, waiting his turn. Walking over, you take a plate and glance down at the table ahead of you.Â
âThis looks good,â you think out loud.Â
âIt does, doesnât it?â Jungkook says, glancing around. He frowns at something, moving his head to get a better look.Â
âWhat? Whatâs wroâ?â
His eyes widen and suddenly heâs crouching enough to remove the inches difference between you, hands gripping your arms. âHide me.â
âWhat?âÂ
âHide me,â he repeats, the insistence in his voice clearer than before.Â
Putting your plate down, you push his shoulders lower. âI am,â you whisper harshly. âBut why?â you say, glancing around.Â
âNo, donât look,â Jungkook says, his tone becoming something like a whine. âSheâll come over if she sees you.â
âWho?â
Jungkook groans, eyes closing. âWhy is she here?â
Ignoring his request not to look, you turn around and scan the room, looking for any familiar faces while your mind goes through a mental list of names of people who could make Jungkook want to hide before a whole breakfast buffet. Just as your name arrives at a potential suspect, the woman herself comes into your view.
âOh.âÂ
Tall, glamorous and even graceful, Valentina Forero struts her preppy, perfect figure, dressed head to toe in designer and a handbag so small youâre sure not even her phone can fit in there.Â
Immediately, you look away from her and down at Jungkook. Heâs already looking up at you with a weary expression. Your lips form an apologetic smile and he sighs, a string of curse words coming out from his mouth in the form of a hushed whisper while he stays pressed against your side trying to hide himself from view.
Of all the things that could possibly go wrong, this has to be the single worst thing.
Valentina is Jungkookâs ex friend with benefits of almost a year. They met shortly after college at your grad party and they started off as casual and eventually there were some feelings involved but they never really bloomed.Â
When Jungkook tried to end things after some months, Valentina had a lot to say and for some reason just didnât want to let him go even though she wasnât looking for something real.Â
You donât blame her, Jungkook attracts people like a magnet, but their relationship was a little more on the toxic side with some jealousy and so many stupid arguments no doubt stemming from the feelings that budded but never grew. It was better for both of them to call it quits, so they never made things official but to call Valentina anything less than an ex would be an injustice to some of the things they went through.
Stealing a glance at her again, you watch for a few seconds as she makes her way through the families, greeting each one with a bright smile.
As she moves, Jungkook moves too, trying to stay hidden from her view behind you. His head presses against your arm, cheek almost against your left boob.
âUm, Jungkook,â you say, smiling. âI get youâre trying to hide but uh, I donât think this is a good lookâŠâ
âWhat?â he says, still distracted as he glances towards where Valentina is.
âWeâre standing at a breakfast bar on a family cruise and your face is pretty close to my boobs.â
He looks up at you, eyes widening when he realises. âOh, sorry.â He stands straight, turning to face the bar instead.Â
âItâs cool,â you answer, picking up your plate again and nudging him to move forward. ââIâm sure weâve given the Collins something to talk about for today.â Turning to your right at the eyes ogling you, you smile plastically at Mr and Mrs Collins.
âSorry,â Jungkook mutters again absentmindedly as he slowly fills his plate.
âJungkook,â you say, nudging him again as you fill your own. âItâs gonna be fine, thereâs so many people here Iâm sure you wonât see each other that much, and even if you do, you have me.â Youâre already beaming when he looks at you, and his own eyes crease in the corners and he smiles too. âThanks. I guess youâre right but please donât ever let me be alone with her.â
âI wonât,â you laugh. âAlthough once she knows youâre here, Iâm sure sheâll try to hookup with you at least once.â
âI hope not,â Jungkook sighs. âSheâs not a bad girl but I just donât wanna go back there, yâknow?â
âMhm, I know,â you say, turning towards the table your parents are seated at. âBut what I donât know is how weâre gonna get to sit without her seeing you.â You nod in the direction of your parents.
Jungkook glances around. âLetâs go sit with Alex and Thalia,â he says, nodding in the opposite direction.
Stealthily, the two of you make your way out onto the deck and approach Alex and his fiancee unseen.
âOh, Y/N,â Thalia beams, leaning in for a hug as soon as she sees you. âYou look beautiful.âÂ
You snort. âI woke up half an hour ago, I definitely look awful.â
âAbsolutely not,â Thalia says with a gracious wave of her hand before Jungkook gets up to greet her too. âYou both look lovely and I'm so happy youâre here!â
âOf course,â you say, smiling at both her and Alex. âWeâre even happier to be here and so excited for you.â
âThank you, angel,â she winks.
âJungkook, are you okay?â Alex asks quietly, frowning as he watches Jungkook carefully. Glancing to your right, you also notice Jungkook is hunched over his food.
âYouâre just drawing more attention to yourself like that,â you let him know before turning back to Alex. âValentina is here,â you say with a small raise of your brow and both Alex and Thalia immediately let out a little âahâ.
Thalia winces apologetically when she glances back at Jungkook. âI do believe that may be on me. My mother is in the same club as her mother so it seems an invitation was deemed non-negotiable, unfortunately,â she adds, placing subtle emphasis on the last word.
Jungkook shakes his head. âDonât worry about it, I was gonna end up seeing her again eventually at some point.â
Alex coughs, his expression changing. âI do believe that time is coming sooner than you want though.â
Jungkook frowns but you understand what Alex means, as does Thalia as you both look up just in time to see Valentina a few feet away, approaching your table.
With a smile thatâs far too innocent for her, she stands at the edge of the table closest to Jungkook. âWell, hello there.â
Alex, being the sweetheart he is, is the first to respond to her greeting, and without surprise, Thalia follows quickly. âThank you for coming,â Alex says as he gives her a quick hug.
âThank you for having me.â Valentina steps to the side to greet Thalia too. âAnd congratulations, Iâm so happy for both of you!â
âThank you,â Thalia says with a genuine smile. As she takes her seat, you get up to greet her too.Â
âItâs nice to see you again, Val,â you say as you meet her in a brief hug, although you canât say you mean it but you hold no animosity towards her.Â
âYou too, Y/N,â she winks.Â
Before she even releases you, Jungkook is getting up and already avoiding eye contact with her. âHey,â he says, just as she leans towards him too.Â
âHello, Jungkook.â When she gives him a hug, itâs a little longer than your own but Jungkook doesnât push away despite his expression looking like he wants to.Â
Alex, Thalia and you have to fight to keep your smiles contained.
âGosh, itâs been so long, hasnât it?â Valentina says as she steps back and takes a seat.Â
âI guess,â Jungkook says, showing little expression as he sits back down and resumes eating his breakfast.Â
âOh, come on, itâs been almost two years.â She gives him a knowing expression before flicking her hair behind her shoulder with a flamboyant flair thatâs signature for Valentina. âIâm sure you missed me.â She leans her elbows on the table. âI know Iâve missed you.â
Seeing Jungkookâs constipated expression, you step in to help him out. âWe all missed you, Valentina,â you smile. âItâs impossible not to.â Thatâs not a lie either, although she was a big personality to deal with sometimes, she still knew how to have fun and was great to talk to.Â
âThank you, Y/N,â she says, returning your smile before turning her attention back to Jungkook. âYou still look as good as you always have too, Kookie.â She leans forward and squeezes his bicep, maybe one too many times. âYouâre still going to the gym I see.â
Jungkook stiffens next to you, meanwhile, your eyes are fixated on her hand on his arm. In a gesture of support, you discreetly slip your hand behind his elbow.Â
Sitting across from you, your friends both notice this. Then, the cogs in the brilliant mind of Alexander Cirillo turn and he comes up with what can only be a genius idea. Perhaps it's all the romance heâs been experiencing recently with his own fiancee, but Alex is convinced that this can only have one outcome, the only possible outcome â the one thatâs been written in the stars since Jungkook and you met so many years ago, heâs sure of it.
Beaming, Alex looks at Valentina. âDonât they look so good together?â
She pauses then frowns. âTogether?â
Your own expression matches Valentinaâs as you glance at Alex too.Â
âYes, together,â he repeats as a fact, smiling at Jungkook and you before looking at Valentina.
âYouâve heard, no? Jungkook and Y/N are together.â
From next to you, Jungkook swallows hard and your hand subconsciously tightens around his arm. Both of you are staring at Alex and he just gives you a subtle raise of his brow.Â
âOh, my,â Valentina smiles, and although thereâs some kind of genuinity to it, thereâs more you can see but havenât got the mental capacity to try to decipher right now when youâre still trying to figure out what Alex is doing.
 âI shouldâve known this was gonna happen, you always were inseparable,â she says with somewhat of an eye roll.Â
Jungkook laughs awkwardly, but heâs not stupid and he knows Alex isnât either. This is one surefire way he can keep Valentina and any of her advances away from him for the next three weeks. All he has to do is pretend to be dating you⊠how hard can that be?
âYeah, I guess it was meant to be,â he says, sounding a little stilted.Â
Youâre still sitting a little dumbfounded but Thalia also gives you an expression that tells you to improvise better. The most you can manage is a meek smile.Â
Jungkook responds almost as awkwardly, putting his arm around you which makes Alex laugh.
âOh, donât be so coy,â he says, sneaking in a wink to you as Valentinaâs eyes remain locked on you both. âItâs been almost what? Eight months?â
âUh, yeah, almost,â you answer, suddenly feeling shy with the way Jungkookâs hand is gripping your waist.Â
Itâs not like heâs never had his hand on your waist before â his face was all up in your boobs only fifteen minutes ago â but the feeling remains. It makes your cheeks go warm, your heart races a little faster and your fingers go fuzzy.Â
Youâre sure itâs showing on your face but Valentina doesnât seem to notice, or if she does, she must think itâs down to you finding this awkward.Â
âWell, congratulations to you too then,â she says, wearing a smile that doesnât actually seem anything less than genuine, but youâre aware thereâs more to her words.
âThank you,â Jungkook and you say in unison.Â
Valentina nods, taking it as her cue to leave. âIâll see you all around, and except for the engaged couple who get a pass, letâs keep the pda to a minimum please,â she adds airily, words directed to Jungkook and you as she saunters off.Â
âCanât promise anything with these two,â Alex calls out after her.
When he looks back at you, heâs grinning like the Cheshire Cat. Thalia purses her lips in a smile that resembles a child trying not to laugh while theyâre getting told off.Â
Turning to them, you burst. âWhat the hell was that?â you say hotly, seeming more flustered than anything else.Â
Alex shrugs. âSorry, it was the best thing I could think of.âÂ
âIt could be worse,â Thalia adds with a smile thatâs supposed to be apologetic but the gleam in her eyes tells you sheâs finding this just as amusing as her fiancĂ©.Â
Then, Jungkook shifts from beside you and only now do you realise youâre still holding his arm. âWell,â he says, briefly glancing down as you let go, âI guess weâre dating now.â
With a small raise of your brows, you shrug lightly and try not to show any signs of how flustered youâre feeling. âI guess so.â
When you meet his gaze, for a second you go still and think of what it means, how might you be expected to act with Jungkook â but really, it doesnât seem that much different from how you already are now. Except of course, if you ever had to indulge in any public displays of affection, cheek kisses, lingering hugs, maybe even a peck on the lipsâŠÂ Â
The thought of it all sets loose a swirl of butterflies in your stomach and only then do you realise that your gaze is still locked on Jungkook, and he too, is still staring at you.Â
With those butterflies still swarming, you abruptly break away from his gaze and notice the tips of his ears are turning pink. You wonder if heâs thinking the same as you right now.Â
âSee, already believable.â
Alexâs voice interrupts your thoughts and when you turn to flare at him, heâs got a smug smirk on his face.Â
âYouâre supposed to be smart,â you say with a sigh, pushing down the butterflies that it almost seems like Alex knows all about. âCouldnât have come up with something smarter?â
âThis is smart,â Alex says with a hint of sass.
âHow?â you sass back.Â
Leaning back, he puts his arm around Thalia as his smirk grows into a smile. âYouâll see, just give it some time,â he sighs, punctuating his sentence with a wink.Â
The end of the first night in Cartagena is celebrated with a formal dinner at a private venue with the most beautiful view of the coast.Â
The Cirilloâs had a special menu created of authentic foods from the town and the dishes were nothing less than exquisite. So much so that Alias and you are both slumped on a hammock on the balcony with bellies full and happy. A few of the guests walk past and side eye you both, probably because Alias has ungraciously undone the top button of his suit pants but it doesnât bother either of you.Â
âProbably shouldnât have eaten so much,â you mumble, looking up at the night sky.
âWeâve still got dessert,â Alias sighs, patting his belly.Â
âWell sitting there isnât going to help,â Jungkookâs voice says from behind you.Â
Turning your head, you smile when you see Jungkook with two dessert plates in his hand. He comes and sits next to you, handing one to each of you.
Alias still manages to devour his serving in silence, but you take a little longer to eat, wondering if Valentina might be somewhere near now that Jungkook is here; youâre certain sheâll be keeping a closer eye on you both so you ought to be making a conscious effort to act more like a couple but youâre not really sure what else to do. Jungkook bringing you dessert seems couple-ish enough, even though itâs what you would do on a usual night anyway.
The three of you fall into a comfortable silence and you give Alias the rest of your dessert to finish as you collapse into the hammock again. As you do so, you feel Jungkookâs hand brush against yours and immediately you glance down at your hands, noticing how your arms and thighs are touching too. Again, itâs nothing unusual for you, but you start to wonder why it feels a little different now youâve noticed it.
âDonât look now,â he says, voice barely a murmur, âbut sheâs watching us.â
When you hum quietly in acknowledgement, his fingers brush the back of yours tentatively again and for some reason unrelated to the wind thatâs blowing, you feel your skin prickling. Releasing a small breath, Jungkook curls his hand, fingers slipping between yours. The pads of your fingers press against him and you return your focus to the night sky above rather than the weird way your heart is beating now.
From your other side, Alias lets out a satisfied sigh before sitting back beside you. âSo,â he says without missing a beat, âwhatâs up between you guys?â
âHm?â You look at him with a small frown.
âYou heard me,â he repeats with the signature boyish grin that he and his brother share. Itâs enough to let you know that he knows.
âWeâre, uh, together,â Jungkook answers.
Alias snorts. âYou gotta sound more convincing than that, Jungkook.â
âIâd like to see you pretend to date someone,â you say, nudging his side.
Shifting to face you, Alias raises a brow. âThatâs easy, watch and learn, lover boy.â He leans closer, arm moving across your chest to touch some hair behind your ears.
You get his point â Alias is close enough to lean in and kiss you if he wanted to, and the small action seems intimate enough since youâre almost laying down with him beside you.
His hand gently traces down your cheek and you giggle, finding it funny as he keeps glancing at Jungkook who shoves him back before he goes any further.
âAlright, I get it,â Jungkook says, somehow shifting even closer to you.
When you glance at him, you canât help but giggle at his expression. He looks a little annoyed, and although you donât think it, anyone else might think heâs crossed the fine line to jealous â Alias certainly does.Â
âAlright, I know, hands off your girlfriend,â he says, raising his hands in surrender.Â
Rolling his eyes, Jungkook mutters, âYeah, whatever.â
Alias just chuckles, leaning back and resting his palm behind his head but unlucky for him, his moment of rest is short lived.Â
âOh for goodness sake Alias!â The hushed whisper of Mrs Cirillo has all of your heads turning. She appears out of nowhere beside the hammock, a look of shock and horror on her face. âIs there a reason youâre basking in the sunset with your trousers half undone?âÂ
âActually,â Alias says unbothered, holding up a finger, âonly the zipper is undone, so by the length of the trousers, mother, theyâre nowhere near half undone.âÂ
Frustrated, she glances around. âPeople must be thinking all sorts.â She looks at Jungkook and you who smile awkwardly, sitting up straight as you hope not to get scolded.Â
Mrs Cirillo is no stranger when it comes to teaching etiquette and given the many years of friendship between your families, sheâs definitely not a stranger to teaching you a few things, and over the years, Jungkook too.Â
She sighs when she looks at you. âDarling, you look beautiful. Jungkook, you too, please teach my son a thing or two.â She sighs again impatiently and Alias grumbles next to you as he does up his zipper. âNow, when youâve made yourself decent, please come with me, your father wants you to meet someone,â she says, not waiting for a response.
Alias groans. âWho? I thought I had met them all.â
âNot this one,â Mrs Cirillo replies airily as sheâs still walking away. âHeâs just joined us tonight.â
Like the dutiful son he is, Alias gets up and follows his mother, though not without groaning about it some more.
Jungkook and you watch him go, but just like Alias, your moment of rest is short lived.
âUm, Y/NâŠâ Jungkookâs voice sounds apprehensive and when you look at him, his expression seems the same. Heâs stretching his neck and looking out towards the opposite direction of the balcony towards the main hall. âIs that⊠Valentina, with your parents?â
Standing up to get a better look, you realise that Jungkook is right. Valentina is mid-way greeting your parents, your mom leaning in to give her a hug.Â
Looking down at Jungkook, you both realise at the same time â your parents donât know about the two of you.Â
Jungkook doesnât wait for you to say anything and instead â with zero regard for the high heels on your feet â he grabs your hand and rushes you towards them.
âOw, wait, Jungkook, slow down!â
âCanât,â he says, although you feel his pace slow down a little. âSheâs gonna say something, of course she is.â
Jungkook isnât wrong and the look on your parents face as youâre less than a few feet away from them tells you that Valentina has just said it. Your dad looks confused and your mom is frowning, her head tilting in the way it does when sheâs not sure she believes something.
âMom!âÂ
She turns her head to the sound of your voice, as does Valentina and your father.
âDad,â you smile, catching your breath as Jungkook and you stop in front of them.Â
Jungkook chuckles awkwardly next to you and you feel his hand go around your waist. âSorry to, uh, interruptâŠâ he purposely avoids Valentinaâs gaze. âWe just, uh,â he glances at you, âwe had a question.âÂ
âWell, so do we,â your dad starts, looking at you with the same confused expression. âWhatââ
âThe dresses for the couple dance!â you blurt, knowing exactly what your father was about to ask. It would totally blow your cover if it seemed like your parents didnât know about Jungkook so you need to come up with something fast. âWe need to know the colours of the dresses for the coupleâs dance, for the wedding.â
If your dad looked confused before, he looks almost dumbfounded now. âA coupleâs dance?â
âY/N, what couple dance?â your mom asks somewhat impatiently and youâre certain she wants to ask the same question your dad was about to, which is most likely about Jungkook and you.
âThe one for the wedding,â Jungkook answers for you. âAll the couples are doing a dance after Alex and Thalia, you know? At the wedding.â He squeezes your waist gently and you chuckle.
âExactly,â you say, taking your mom's hand discreetly. âSince Jungkook and I are dancing together, well, he needs to know the colour of my dress and Iâve forgotten.â You say it with no hesitation but with the way youâre squeezing her hand repeatedly, your mom still seems confused.
She glances at Valentina who is now staring at Jungkookâs hand right around your waist, before glancing back at you.Â
Taking advantage of Valentinaâs momentary lapse in attention, you give her a subtle raise of your brow and hope that mother-daughter telepathy is a real thing.Â
âA coupleâs dance?â your father asks again. âHoney, I didnât know about this,â he says to your mom.Â
âWell, yes, I suppose I forgot to tell you,â she says, squeezing your hand back and you let out a grateful sigh of relief, as does Jungkook.Â
âY/N, your dress is periwinkle blue for the party,â she says to you before looking at Jungkook. You can see the apprehension in her expression though itâs only noticeable to you. âJungkook, sweetheart, Iâll make sure your suit is matching with Y/Nâs of course.â
âThank you,â he nods, lips pursed.Â
Together, you glance at Valentina who already seems bored.Â
âWell, Iâll come find you later, Mrs L/N,â she says, already turning to step away.Â
Your mom says a quick goodbye before Jungkook and you are left alone with her and your dad.Â
âIs there a reason I didnât know about this couple's dance?â
Letting out a small laugh, Jungkook pats your dad's shoulder. âSorry, we made that up, there isnât a coupleâs dance.â
âThere isnât?â
âNo, there isnât,â your mom answers, her brow raises as she looks between Jungkook and you. âBut what I would like to know is why we just had to lie and why on earth is Valentina congratulating your father and I about you two and your relationship?â
âItâs because of me,â Jungkook answers immediately which prompts a look of surprise from your parents. âI just wanted an easy way to keep away from Valentina and saying Iâm with Y/N was the best way for me to do it.â He lowers his head looking a bit ashamed.Â
âWell it was actually Alex who said it first,â you say, stepping forward. âHe pretty much roped us into it with Valentina right there, we were clueless.â You take Jungkookâs arm and smile at your parents. âItâs just a little white lie and honestly as long as Jungkook and I are okay with it, then itâs harmless.â
âAnd you are okay with it?â your dad asks.Â
âSure.â
Your mother frowns, the apprehension still not having left her expression. âAnd Jungkook⊠youâre okay with it too?â
Jungkook nods. âVery okay with it.â
âAlright then, but just be wary.â Your mom glances between you both. She opens her mouth as if to say more but shakes her head instead. âWho else knows?â
âAlex, Thalia, Alias, and now you both.â
âHm, if you want to keep it a secret then I would keep it to that. The more people who know the more likely it is to come out.â
âYes, I agree,â your dad says, frowning as he thinks. âAlthough I do think it would make sense to tell Leon and Helena.â
Your mom agrees with him. âI suppose it does but itâs up to you both.â
âAre you sure?â you ask, brows raising. Itâs not unusual for your parents to share something with the Cirilloâs, but when itâs something like this, a lie, you donât imagine your parents telling them.
Jungkook shuffles awkwardly. âUh, theyâre coming over now.â
Your mom looks up, smiling as they come over. âYes, Y/N, after all itâs not really such a big lie. Jungkook and you do everything together anyway, how much more different can this be?â
âRight,â you nod, confused by the sentiment those words make you feel â perhaps Alex isnât so wrong, maybe you do do everything with Jungkook. It must be giving the wrong idea to peopleâŠÂ
Though that doesnât matter now since you need to seem like youâre dating him.Â
âJust who I was looking for,â Mrs Cirillo beams as she approaches, but instead of looking at your mom, sheâs looking at you.
âMe?â you ask, surprised.Â
âYes.â She looks at Jungkook too. âAnd you.â
Jungkook shares the same expression as you. âMe?â
âOh, yes, and donât act so shy either of you.â Her smile seems rather cheeky, as does Mr Cirilloâs who stands beside her. âWhatâs this I hear about you two dating now, hm?â
âOh.â Smiling hesitantly, you prepare yourself to tell them the truth as well. This feels a bit different though because you can see the excitement in Mrs Cirilloâs face, even in Mr Cirillo.Â
âI mean itâs about time,â Mr Cirillo says with a deep chuckle, looking at your parents to agree.Â
Jungkook looks rather pained as he looks between them both. âWho told you?â
âAlias, of course,â Mrs Cirillo says. âHe said youâve been keeping it a secret for some time though I donât see why, this is wonderful news!âÂ
She waves her hand with the statement and with it, a part of you suddenly feels like youâre being let down by yourself. Itâs odd to see them so happy for Jungkook and you, only for it not to be real.Â
You donât blame them though â youâve only been pretending to date Jungkook for a day but youâre already starting to see Alexâs point a little bit more. Having Jungkook by your side just feels right.Â
Come to think of it, if anyone else asked you to pretend to be their girlfriend for a few weeks, youâd definitely say no. It would be hard to act so close with someone not only emotionally but physically, whereas thinking of the way Jungkook was so close to your side just a little while ago on the hammock, fingers curled around yours, you feel yourself coil at even the thought of being with anyone else.Â
Thatâs not unusual though, right? The only reason you canât imagine it with anyone else is because Jungkook is your best friend. Heâs the guy youâre most comfortable around and so you feel safe with him. Thoughts pausing, your gaze drifts to him as you briefly zone out from whatever joke Mrs Cirillo is making.Â
Jungkook still looks on hesitantly and the way his bottom lip moves, you can tell heâs waiting to say something. As soon as he sees his chance and quickly gets a word in. âOh, well, actually, Mrs Cirillo, itâs not really real.â
She looks towards him and frowns a little. âWhat do you mean?â Thereâs disappointment in her tone that you (for some unknown reason) can relate to.
âItâs more of a make believe relationship, if thatâs one way to put it,â your dad answers albeit looking confused himself.Â
Mr Cirillo appears to be on the same brainwave as your dad as he looks confused too. âThatâs absurd. I believe it very much.â
âYes, yes,â Mrs Cirillo says, nodding. âWho wouldnât?â
Pushing aside your own confused feelings, you help clear up this mess. âWhat weâre trying to say is that itâs not a real relationship.â You glance at Jungkook who looks at you and nods. âWeâre just pretending to date.â
âOh.â Their expressions fall, small frowns replacing the excitement in their eyes.Â
âWhy would you do that?â Mr Cirillo asks.Â
âMy ex is on the cruise,â Jungkook answers. âYou probably remember her, Valentina?âÂ
Thereâs a few seconds of quiet until Mr Cirillo finds the name familiar. âAh, yes, tall girl, Forero if Iâm not mistaken?â
Jungkook nods, lips pursed.Â
âSo sheâs the reason youâre doing this?â Mrs Cirillo gestures between Jungkook and you.Â
Jungkook nods again.Â
She sighs quietly. âHonestly, it all seems a bit fuddy duddy, Valentina is harmless. Thereâs better ways to keep someone away, Jungkook, wouldnât it be better to just ask her to stay away from you?â
âThat might come across as more rude than this,â you say with a shrug. âAlso, we ought to mention that this was all Alexâs idea.â
âAlex?!â Mrs Cirillo exclaims. âDid he even ask you first?â
âNope,â you shake your head with a smile having absolutely no qualms throwing your best friend under the bus.Â
âOh, why didnât you say so sooner?â Mrs Cirillo turns and reaches for her husband's hand. âLeon, I do believe that boy is getting almost as troublesome as his older brother.â
Mr Cirillo laughs. âOh, itâs just a little fun, besides, having Jungkook and Y/N pretending to play house canât be all that bad.â He turns to Jungkook and you and winks.
You return his cheek with a smile. âItâs actually easier than it looks.â
âIâm sure it is,â he quips with a quick raise of his brow. His smirk seems telling but you donât think anything of it at the moment as you feel Jungkookâs hand on your arm.
âJust donât tell anyone please,â he says, chuckling nervously.
âOf course not,â Mrs Cirillo says. âI think Alex may have been onto something anyway.â She glances towards your mom and they share a smile. âLetâs get something to drink, hm?â
Your mom laughs, taking her arm. âYes, please, I need one.â
Together, they walk off and to you it looks like theyâre high schoolers sharing secrets again â youâre sure theyâre going to have lots to talk about again today.Â
Mr Cirillo chuckles as they go off. âThree guesses what theyâre talking about,â he says quietly to your dad who shares a smile with his friend before they both turn to Jungkook and you.
âWell, I think Iâm going to go and look for more dessert,â you say, slowly taking a step back to excuse yourself and Jungkook.Â
âYeah, Iâm gonna do that too,â Jungkook says, nodding his head at your dad and Mr Cirillo.
âOf course, Iâll see you later on,â your dad smiles. His eyes fall to where Jungkookâs hand is holding your arm and his smile grows just a little wider but before you can think anything of it, Mr Cirillo makes a comment.
âThatâs a nice suit youâre wearing, Jungkook.â He nods, looking visibly impressed.
âThanks.â
Mr Cirillo continues. âI remember when you would wear your suits from those high street stores with the cheap labels but look at you now, kid.â
Pausing in your slow retreat, you blink. Youâve known Mr Cirillo all your life so you know that the comment really holds no ill intent, and also bearing in mind the fact that you know just how much he has come to admire Jungkook and cares for him as much as he does for you, but that doesnât mean itâs okay for Mr Cirillo to make a comment like that.
Jungkook only smiles, though he doesnât need to say anything for anyone to see that the backhanded compliment isnât appreciated. He continues to step away but now youâre rooted firmly in the spot.
âWell with a personality like his and far more brains than most people combined, Jungkook has never needed material to make him look good, wouldnât you agree, Mr Cirillo?â Your expression is friendly enough but your tone? Not so much.
He smiles awkwardly, immediately having understood his mistake. âDoes that mean the opposite for myself?â he asks lightly.
âOh, Iâve never thought so,â you say, smiling plastically. âThose words came from your own mouth.â
Mr Cirillo laughs. âYouâre a sharp one, Y/N. That's why I like you a lot.â
âLikewise, Leon,â you wink, reaching for Jungkookâs arm. âNow weâll be off.â
Mr Cirillo still chuckles and you catch your dad smiling at you as you walk away with Jungkook.
âDid you just call him ugly?â Jungkook asks with a small laugh once you're out of earshot.Â
âI didnât call him anything,â you shrug.
He laughs again, coming to a stop with you near the dessert table where you both browse the selection. âYou know I couldâve answered myself though,â he says after a moment.Â
Taking your pick, you turn to him with a small pout. Itâs not the first time someone has made a comment about Jungkook that has annoyed you more than him, and you know that Jungkook prefers to pick and choose his battles wisely, unlike you always feeling as though you have to say something.Â
âI know, sorry,â you wince a little. âForce of habit.â
âItâs okay,â he smiles, taking a bowl of Eton mess.Â
Together, you start walking towards the same hammock you were previously sitting at.
âI actually think itâs kinda cute,â he adds.
Your brows raise inquisitively. âHaving me as your knight in shining armour?â
He shrugs, taking a spoonful into his mouth as you both sit down. âMore like my princess with her many privileges.â His lips curl into a smile as he says it.
Laughing, you lean back comfortably into the hammock. âWell, of course, Mr Cirillo wouldnât dare say anything to me.â
âAnd no one else other than you would insult Mr Cirillo to his face.â
Holding up your fork, you laugh again. âI only implied, thereâs a difference.â
Jungkook hums, leaning back next to you. He takes a big spoonful into his mouth, eating this slowly while you steal some of his. Swallowing, he sits up a little beside you. âYou know, you donât have to do this if you donât want to.â
Looking up at him, you frown. âDo what?â
âPretend to date me.â
âWhy wouldnât I want to?â
He shrugs. âIf it makes you uncomfortable, or even if you just donât want to.â
âI donât mind,â you say, sitting up with him.
He doesnât say anything for a few seconds, watching your expression for any signs of a lie. âYou sure?â
âIâm sure,â you repeat.
With those words, Jungkook seems to relax. âOkay.â Faint traces of a smile appear on his face as he leans back.Â
âThe soap here smells amazing,â Thalia says, bringing her hands to her nose to sniff again a few times after drying them.Â
Tossing your used hand towel in the hamper, you take a sniff too. âMm, it does. I smell coconut.â
âAnd yuzu,â Thalia says, still inhaling the smell.Â
Laughing, you pull her hands away from her nose as you walk out of the washroom together.Â
The corridor is dimly lit as you walk back towards the restaurant but youâre very impressed by the interior, the burgundy and golden interior of this part of the venue complimenting each other well, especially with the many plants lining the corridors.Â
âWhereâs Alex?â you ask.
âSomewhere around here,â Thalia answers. âHonestly I lost him an hour ago after he went to check out the golf course here.â
âThereâs a golf course here?â you ask, surprised. Though really you donât know why youâre surprised, walking to the bathroom was a mission on its own, this place is huge.Â
âYeah they have everything, tennis courts, basketball, thereâs even a riding school.â
At that, your ears perk up. âAre the horses available to hire?â
Thalia turns to you with a smile. âYou wanna go for a canter?â
âCan we?â You ask, eyes lighting up too. âOh, itâs been so long since Iâve been riding.â
âWeâll have to ask but Iâm sure my dad could sort something out for us. Although we have booked a resort for when we get to Barcelona and later on in Malta too. Theyâre renowned for their riding instructors.â
Laughing, you walk around the next corner together. âHow have you booked resorts while weâre on a cruise? I bet Mrs Cirillo had something to do with it,â you add, knowing that she always has to have everything and the best of it for her kids.
Thalia nods with a smile. âMy mom and yeah, Helena. Theyâve been planning this for a year, of course thereâs going to be something for everyone.âÂ
âStrippers?â you ask, brows raising.
âExcept that.â
âHm, fair,â you say, frowning as you walk around another corner. âAnyway, I donât really care for the instructors but itâll have to be Barcelona. I just wanna ride, itâs been so long since I last went.â
Thalia agrees. âSure, Iâll ask my dad, Iâm pretty sure heâs already friends with the owner of the one in Barcelona so it should be easy.â
âGreat,â you smile, excited by the thought, though your smile turns into a frown as you realise youâre walking by the same door you just walked out of a little while ago.Â
At the same time, Thalia slows down. âAre we lost?â she asks.
Looking up at the womenâs washroom sign, your frown deepens. âYeah, I think weâve just gone in a circle.â You look up and down the corridor, taking a few steps in the opposite direction from which you just came to follow a different path. âMaybe we should try going left from here instead?â
âThere really should be a clearer exit,â Thalia huffs. âMy feet hurt.â
Laughing, you glance back at her. âI donât think anyone was taking into account the fact that people might be walking in 6-inch heels down these corridorsâ oh.â Mid-sentence, you bump into someone as youâre walking around the next corner. âSorry,â you say, looking up at the guy as you feel steady hands on your arms to stop you from stumbling.Â
âIâm so sorry,â he says at the same time, looking down.
Oh.Â
His brows knit together before a smile breaks out on his face. âY/N?â
âLawrence!â A smile appears on your face embarrassingly fast. âHi!â
He chuckles softly, taking a step back and taking his hands with him. You donât know whether to appreciate the sweetness or be sad theyâre gone.
Lawrence Goldman is one of the most beautiful men youâve ever laid eyes on with a personality to match, and he was your high school crush for years. He was everyoneâs crush to be honest, but even in uni, you never were able to stop swooning over him, but thatâs all itâs ever been, a crush. For some reason, you could never let yourself take it further despite him showing interest a few times.Â
âItâs been so long, my gosh, how are you?â he asks, eyes skimming your figure. âYou look absolutely amazing,â he adds without a second thought.
âHey again,â Thalia says, appearing beside you.
Lawrence gives her a smile, his attention quickly returning to you.
âIâm great,â you beam, âhow are you? Iâm surprised to see you, I thought you were working in Singapore?â
âI am,â he nods before looking at Thalia. âWell I was, but there was no way I was gonna miss this oneâs wedding.â
Thalia laughs, putting her arm around him briefly. âLove you for it, Goldie.â
Lawrence rolls his eyes at the nickname and you smile. Thalia and Lawrence attended the same prep school before reuniting in college, and itâs through Lawrence that Thalia was introduced to Alex and the rest of you â your world is apparently a very small world so Lawrence being here really shouldnât be a surprise to you, but with everything else going on, you may have forgotten about Lawrence.Â
âIâve only just joined because I had a meeting I couldnât miss yesterday,â he adds, eyes skimming down your figure once more while he thinks youâre still smiling at Thalia but you definitely donât miss it.Â
âAh, I see.â You canât help it when you mirror his actions, noting how the top two buttons of his shirt are undone, giving a peak of the chain heâs always worn since he Longbottom-ed â he clearly knows the effect it has. âSo youâre joining us for the rest of the cruise?â When your eyes meet his again, his lips curl into a smirk.Â
âYes,â he nods. âIâll be here.â
Noticing Thalia glancing between you both, you realise you ought to stop whatever weirdness is going on right now before she thinks thereâs something between you, not that she wonât ask you herself anyway.Â
âWell thatâs great,â you smile, taking a step closer to Thaliaâs side.
âMhm, Iâm looking forward to spending time with you,â he says.
Your response is on the top of your tongue â âso am Iâ â and you intend to say it with a flutter of your lashes, but before you can say anything, Thalia answers for you.Â
âWe all are,â she grins, hand winding around your waist where she squeezes with a light force when she says the next words. âIncluding Jungkook and Alex.â
For a second youâre confused but the mention of Jungkook sparks your memory and you remember everything thatâs happened in the past few days.
Jungkook and you are dating â you realise now why Thalia interjected and she was right to do so, otherwise you mightâve made a silly mess by opening yourself up to flirting with Lawrence.Â
âOh, yes,â you answer, perking up. âJungkook will definitely be happy to see you Iâm sure, itâs been a while since we all met last.â
âYeah?â Lawrence casually responds.Â
âOf course,â Thalia says with a wiggle of her brows. âY/N is his girlfriend, she would know of course.â
As you smile dutifully, you catch the confusion briefly show on Lawrenceâs face before he quickly disguises it as surprise. âYou and Jungkook?â he says, lips turning into a smile. Itâs the kind of smile that could mean many things.Â
âYep,â you nod, lips pursed in a smile.Â
Something resembling a sigh leaves him. âYou guys will have to catch me up on that for sure,â he says.
âThereâll be lots to catch you up on,â Thalia grins, âbut right now, can we figure out how to get out of here?â
Lawrence chuckles, stepping to the side. âOf course, I know the way.â He gestures towards the left, waiting for you and Thalia to pass.Â
As you fall into stride with Thalia on one side and Lawrence on the other side, you canât help but feel some kind of disappointment at Lawrenceâs reaction, though what did you expect?Â
Of course heâs not going to say or do anything differently, and as long as youâve agreed to be Jungkookâs girlfriend, you shouldnât want him to react any differently. Youâre lucky Thalia stepped in when she did or you mightâve completely forgotten youâre supposed to be in a relationship with someone else and wouldâve ended up blowing the story for Jungkook entirely.Â
âAh, here we are!â Thalia skips forward out into the late evening night.
The view on the balcony now is even more beautiful with fairy lights adorning the trees along its perimeter. Everyone you recognise seems to be congregating towards one area as itâs almost time to leave to board the cruise ship again.Â
âOh there you are.â Jungkook appears from the middle of the crowd, not seeming to have noticed Lawrence whoâs more closely following Thalia. âWeâre leaving soon, here.â He hands you your purse you left with him a while earlier.Â
âThanks,â you answer, taking it and checking you havenât left anything else. âSorry, we got a bit lost inside.â
âMhm, thatâs fine, I was just about to come look for you anyway,â Jungkook says, looking at Thalia and only then does he notice Lawrence. The lines expressing concern in his face deepen into confusion.
Seeing this change, Lawrence smiles. âHey mate.â
In a split second Jungkookâs confused frown changes to a smile. âLawrence!â Reaching forward, the two share a pleasant exchange.Â
âItâs been a while, howâve you been?â
âNot bad, yourself?â
Jungkook nods. âIâve been alright.â
âBetter than alright from what I hear,â Lawrence says, brow raising as he glances in your direction.Â
Jungkookâs gaze follows and you smile with a little shrug, subtly nodding at Jungkook.
âAh.â Jungkook chuckles, taking a step towards your side. âWell, yeah, better than alright,â he confirms with a very believable smile.Â
Lawrence laughs, looking between you. From behind him, you catch Thalia standing beside Alex as they watch the interaction play out.Â
âI think itâs amazing,â Lawrence says, patting Jungkookâs arm. âYou two are great together.â
âYouâve only just seen us again,â you say with a smile.Â
âHm, Iâve seen it for years,â Lawrence replies with a nod of his head and a small sigh as he looks at you. Heâs still smiling but when you look at him, the brightness in his eyes has faded. âTrust me,â he says quieter than before, âI was always watching.â
Pursing your lips, you smile but you still feel self conscious as his gaze on you doesnât budge. âThat sounds a little stalker-ish, Lawrence,â you chuckle.Â
Laughing, he shrugs. âMightâve been. I always was a bit of a recluse.â
âI wouldnât say you were a recluse.â
He arches his brow, lips morphing into a cocky smile. âThen what would you say I was?â
Mirroring his expression, you scoff. âWhat dâyou want me to say, huh? Tall, handsome and mysterious?â
âTook the words right from my mouth,â he says smugly.Â
âHa,â you laugh. Despite it being somewhat true, you respond to say otherwise. âYou wish.â
Lawrence smiles. âAh, I guess those words are reserved for this one, huh?â He nods towards Jungkook.Â
âHmâŠâ you look towards Jungkook who smiles with his lips pursed. Itâs not his usual full smile and behind it there seems to be a reservation that tells you heâs being more quiet than usual. Nudging him gently, you beam when he meets your eyes. âNah, Iâve got better words for this one.â
He nods and chuckles quietly but only briefly.Â
You wonder whatâs caused the shift in his mood since he seemed so bright only a moment ago when greeting Lawrence.Â
âOh, youâll have to tell me all about it, Iâm interested to hear how things happened between you,â Lawrence says.
Humming quietly, you nod as your attention remains on Jungkook. âSome other time, I think we need to get moving now,â you say, nodding towards the crowd of moving guests ahead of you.Â
âAh, yes,â he answers, turning to look behind him. âIâll see you around though, yeah?â He places his hand on your arm.Â
You donât pay much attention to it but feel Jungkook pull on your hand gently.Â
âYeah man, weâll see you around,â he says, reaching to pat Lawrenceâs arm.Â
Lawrence nods, throwing you a smile before he turns and joins the rest of your party.Â
As he walks away, Jungkook turns to you. âShall we go too?â
You nod, allowing him to lead the way, hand still in yours. Thereâs a hum of conversation around you as everyone makes their way back towards the cars to take you to the port, but youâre grateful no one interrupts the two of you as you walk alone, a little behind the rest.Â
âYou okay?â you ask after a quiet moment.Â
Jungkook answers almost right away. âYeah. You?â
âMhm.â You watch him as he kicks some of the sand beneath his feet with every step. âYou sure though?â
He turns to look at you, a smile on his lips though his brows furrow a little in the middle. âYeah, why?â
âJust,â you shrug. âI thought you seemed a bit quiet back there with Lawrence.â
Jungkook turns away and shrugs. âIâm all good, no reason not to be.âÂ
Itâs not exactly convincing to you, but you take his word for it. If itâs something he wants to tell you, heâll tell you in his own time if he wants to. Or, itâs actually just nothing and youâre overthinking this for no reason. After all, there is no explanation that you can think of for Jungkook to be upset with Lawrence, especially when he was so happy to see him just now. Yes, youâre just overthinking it.Â
âY/N, Jungkook, please be on time for breakfast tomorrow and not an hour late like last time,â your mother scolds airily as she waves her hand behind her.Â
âYes, mom,â you smile as she turns into her cabin.Â
âWill do,â Jungkook nods, raising a hand to say good night to your parents.Â
Once their door is closed, Jungkook continues to walk with you towards your cabin.Â
âYou better wake up earlier this time,â you yawn, pulling out your key card.Â
Jungkook scoffs, coming to a stop next to your door. âMe?!â He rests his hand against the door frame, leaning closer. âYouâre the one who was still sleeping when I came down.â
Smiling, you shake your head. âYou have no proof.â
He matches your smile, cocking his head. âAlright, Iâm recording you tomorrow morning, donât get mad at me when I get your bed head and dried dribble face on camera.â
âHey,â you pout, leaning against the door frame. âI donât dribble.â
Jungkook shrugs, smiling. âTomorrow Iâll have proof.â
You narrow your eyes at him, internally vowing to wake up early so you can be ready before he comes to you. âThereâs noââ
âOh, Jungkook, Y/N!âÂ
The sickeningly sweet cotton candy voice has your smile faltering. Jungkook winces, his face hidden from Valentina as she approaches from behind you.Â
Slowly, you turn around to face her.
âWell isnât this just perfect,â she beams, coming to stop beside you both. âWeâre neighbours here!âÂ
Chuckling, you nod your head. âThat really is perfect.âÂ
Valentine smiles again, glancing between the two of you before shrugging. âWell,â she sighs, opening her purse to look for her key card. âDonât mind me, I was just grabbing a few things. You two enjoy your night.â She waves airily but doesnât move.Â
âMhm, you too,â you nod.Â
As she pulls out her key card, sheâs just about to walk away before she pauses to focus on Jungkook and a delicate frown appears on her face.Â
Glancing at him, youâre not surprised to see sheâs frowning. Jungkook hasnât said a word and he looks rather pained right now.
âJungkook, are you okay?â She tilts her head. âYou look a littleâŠâ She steps closer, frown deepening as she moves until all of a sudden she stops. âOh.â Her eyes widen, an apologetic pout appearing on her face. âI see, was I interrupting something?â She asks, pointing between you both.Â
For a second youâre confused â yes, she interrupted your conversation with Jungkook and she knows that already â but then you remember that youâre supposed to be in a romantic relationship with Jungkook, and the expression on Valentina's face tells you she thinks sheâs interrupted something else.Â
Jungkook is obviously just as confused. âHuh?â
âYouâre both going to bed now, are you not?â
He frowns. âUh, yeahâŠâ
âYes, I thought so. Apologies thenâŠâ She glances down towards Jungkookâs crotch as the words that follow imply it â âoh, sorry, I mustâve put that fire out.â
A strangled noise escapes Jungkookâs throat and he looks relatively mortified. âWhat?â no!â He takes a step closer to your side while you somehow pull him closer to your side protectively in an attempt to hide him from her.Â
Valentina doesnât respond to the expressions on neither of your faces and only sighs disappointedly, flipping her hair behind her shoulder. âI remember there was a time when I was the one to ignite the fire in your loins.â
The same strangled noise comes from Jungkook and you have to stop from bursting out into laughter.Â
âVal,â Jungkook says, âwere you not going somewhere?â
âOh, yes.â She perks up, smiling brightly again. âWell you two lovebirds go ahead.âÂ
Just when you expect her to walk away, she doesnât. In fact she stands there waiting for Jungkook and you to go into what she thinks is your shared cabin.Â
âWe will,â Jungkook says with the fakest smile youâve seen on him.
Valentina only nods, still waiting.
Jungkook is about to say something again but you know thereâs no point. Unlocking your door, you pull him into your room with you. âBye, Val.â
âGood night,â you hear her respond as the door closes shut.Â
Turning around to face Jungkook, you look at him with an expression crossed between shock and amusement. âOh my God, how did you ever date her?!â
Jungkook groans, collapsing face down onto the end of your bed. âI swear she isnât that bad, sheâs doing it on purpose,â he says, muffled into the sheets.
Humming, you sit at the end of your bed beside him. âI guess so.â You lie down so youâre level with him.
Lying beside him, itâs quiet for a moment as you replay the exchange in your head. âSo, she mustâve really been something if she was igniting the fire in your loins.â You canât help but snort after saying it and Jungkook laughs beside you too, head still buried.Â
Now that Valentina isnât here, you allow yourself to laugh at it and youâre glad Jungkook does too. By the time youâre done laughing at it, youâre wiping away tears.
Lifting his head, he shakes his head. âThis isnât gonna be easy,â he says.Â
âYeah, she really doesnât make it easy,â you respond quietly.Â
Both of you fall silent for a moment again, listening carefully to see if you can hear her footsteps.Â
âI canât hear her anymore,â Jungkook says.
âMe neither.â You turn to look at him.Â
He props himself up on his elbows. âSo what now?â
âWell, we could wait till she goes away and then you sneak out,â you think aloud. âBut how are we gonna do that every night?â
Jungkook nods, understanding. âSo I should just stay?â
âIâm cool with it if you are,â you shrug.
For a moment, Jungkook doesnât say anything, then he looks at you with a soft frown creasing his forehead. âAre you sure?â
âTotally sure,â you nod, rolling onto your side to lean on your elbow. âBesides, itâs not like weâve made things easy for ourselves,â you add with a laugh.Â
The lines seem to have disappeared from Jungkookâs face but when your eyes search for some kind of clue to his feelings, you find something you canât decipher hiding behind the brown of his eyes.Â
He smiles, releasing a soft breath as he does so, and only now do you realise how close your face is to his.Â
âPromise me youâll tell me if you feel uncomfortable?â he says.Â
Nodding, you lift your pinky finger.Â
He raises his own hand and closes his own pinky finger around yours.Â
âI will,â you promise him.
His smile grows and oddly, you feel your heart do a little flutter in your chest as a warm feeling spreads through you. Youâre suddenly reminded of how you felt earlier on in the evening as you lay on the balcony with Jungkook⊠has he always made you feel this way? Before you can let yourself think about it, Jungkook is leaping off the bed and with him, the feeling disappears.Â
âSo, I donât plan on having your mum tell me off tomorrow morning so Iâm going to sleep.â He turns to look at you, placing his hand on his hips. âSlight problem though, my clothes are in my cabin.âÂ
âThen go get them, duh,â you answer.
âWhat if Valentina is still outside?â he says, pointing to the door. âItâs only been a few minutes, I wouldnât be surprised if sheâs trying to eavesdrop on us right now.â
âHmmâŠâ you canât deny he has a point. âWell I guess,â you say, dropping your voice to a whisper, âyou wonât know until you try.â
âAlright,â Jungkook sighs, grabbing his phone from the bed.Â
You follow him to the door and youâre actually almost surprised when he opens it to reveal no one is there. Jungkook turns to look at you sporting a similar expression on his face and shrugs before stepping out.Â
âI guess that makes things easier for usââ
Youâre interrupted mid-sentence as Jungkook immediately turns back into the room with a slightly panicked expression, barging into you.Â
âJungkook!â Losing your balance, you feel yourself falling backwards with Jungkook stumbling forward. Your ass hits the floor first and you just manage to bring your arms behind you in time but your head still hits the carpeted floor behind you, and Jungkook who seems to fall in slow motion with you, eventually lands on top of you.Â
âOh Iâm sorry,â he mumbles, pushing himself up onto his forearms.
âThat really hurt,â you groan, squirming on the floor. Youâre grateful the floor is carpeted but both your head and ass still hurt.Â
Jungkook looks down at you with concern replacing any previous features. âWhere?âÂ
Rubbing the back of your head, you frown at him. âEverywhere. Whyâd you turn back?â
âSheâs right there!â Jungkook suddenly whispers instead. âShe was practically having sex against the wall with some guy.â
Still recovering from your fall, you look at him confused. âWhat?â
Jungkook grimaces. âShe was outside her room with some guy.â
âBut we just saw her!â you respond in a hushed whisper.Â
âI know! He mustâve been close by and they were making out like their lives depended onââÂ
âWell, this is interesting.â
Rolling your eyes at the sound of her voice, you let your head drop back onto the floor while Jungkook scrambles to move off of you. Moving beside you, he reveals Valentina standing at the door, her lipstick smudged and her hair a bit messier than it was a little while earlier.
She narrows her eyes, placing her hands on her hips. âForeplay on the floor is new to me, and leaving the door openâŠâ She looks directly at Jungkook. âI didnât know you were into voyeurism.â
Jungkook visibly freaks out, getting up and pulling you with him. âNo, gosh, it was an accident.â
Valentina frowns. âI donât judge, Jungkook,â she says matter-of-factly.
âI wouldnât care if you did,â he replies almost exasperatedly. âBut this was just an accident, we fell over.â
âHm, okay,â she says with a shrug as she glances at the bed.Â
You know she doesnât believe him but really thereâs nothing else you can say to make her think otherwise. Besides, you donât really care what she thinks while your head still hurts.Â
âWell, anyway, Iâve got to go.â She looks back at you with a smirk. âHow about we both do our best to keep it down tonight, hm?â she winks before turning and fluttering her fingers. âTa-ta angels, see you in the morning!â
As soon as sheâs disappeared from view, you go shut the door behind her, leaning against the wood.Â
âOkay, she is so doing it on purpose.â
âI know,â Jungkook agrees almost immediately. âI donât get why though.â
âI know why,â you say, raising your brows. âShe probably still isnât over you.â
Jungkook shakes his head. âIf anything, sheâs just not used to people moving on from her. Her exes were always all over her when we were together.â
âSo she expects you to go crawling back to her?â
âPretty much,â he shrugs. âSheâs really not helping herself though. Maybe I should talk to her, tell her to just give me spaceâŠâ He looks at you, raising his brow in question.
âYou could, but I reckon sheâll just act innocent and pretend she has no clue what youâre talking about.â
âTrue,â Jungkook sighs.
âLook, itâs fine,â you say, walking over to the drawer. âItâs just Val, nothing we havenât dealt with before.â Throwing a set of satin pyjamas on the bed, you turn around to face him again. âBesides, Iâm tired now, my head hurts and Iâd like to sleep.â
The frown on Jungkookâs face doesnât disappear. âIt still hurts?â he asks, coming over to you.Â
âYeah, you knocked me over pretty hard, my ass hurts too,â you pout.
Jungkook chuckles, hands coming to rest on your shoulders and he squeezes gently. âWant me to massage it?â he jokes.
âOoh, good idea. Letâs leave the door open too,â you laugh.
Jungkook smiles, still giving you a shoulder massage and you feel yourself letting go slowly.Â
âMm,â you hum softly, head relaxing. Jungkook steps closer and you let your forehead rest against his chest.
You donât realise as Jungkookâs hands stop working and gently make their way around your waist, holding you up as you get lost in the warmth of his embrace.
âShould we go to bed before you fall asleep here?â Jungkook says after a moment.Â
Pulling away from him, you smile with tired eyes. âDibs on the bathroom first.â
Jungkook obliges and sits down on your bed while you go first. When itâs his turn, he goes quickly since he has the most minimal night time routine, one of which youâve always been envious of.Â
Youâre just finishing brushing your hair when heâs coming out.
âWhat time is it?â he asks, stepping out as he dries his face.Â
âAlmost two,â you respond, getting up to walk over to your pyjamas on the bed.Â
Jungkook turns around without being told, facing the opposite direction. âDâyou think I could go get my clothes from upstairs now?â
You pull on your pyjama bottoms. âProbably not. I donât think I have anything that would fit you either.â
âWhat do I do then?â Jungkook asks, his confused tone making you laugh.
âDonât act like you donât sleep naked half the time, Jeon.â
âWell when Iâm alone, yeah. I donât wanna make you uncomfortable,â he says.
âIâm not, donât worry.â You clamber into bed, pulling the sheets up to your shoulders as you get comfortable. âJust get into bed.â
Still facing away from you, Jungkook shrugs before pulling off his top. You donât realise youâre staring at him strip until he starts pulling down his pants.
Abruptly, you pull the covers up even higher so you canât see him. You hear him shuffling and then he stops but you canât feel him getting into bed.
âReally?â he says. âMy abs offend you that much?â
You canât help but laugh, still keeping your eyes closed as you move the sheets down but place your hand in front of your eyes instead. âActually, they make for pretty good eye candy.â
Jungkook gasps scandalously, still shuffling about the room. âHave you been checking me out, Y/N?â
Cocking your head, you smile. âNow what kind of best friend would I be if I didnât appreciate you and your God given looks, hm?â
âA terrible one.â
âExactly.â
âSo why are you covering your eyes?â he asks, his voice growing louder as you feel the covers move beside you.Â
âBecause thereâs another friend of yours that I donât think I should be seeing as your best friend,â you say, ignoring the way you feel your cheeks go warm when you say it, and especially the way Jungkookâs deep chuckle sounds as you notice the bed dip beside you.
âHeâs covered,â he says quietly.
âNot enough.â
Jungkook laughs again and this time you can feel his body beside yours. âThat friend is hidden safe and sound, Y/N. You can look now.â
Peeking your eyes open slowly, you see Jungkook right beside you in bed. Heâs sitting up, smiling down at you with his abs eye level to you. Youâve seen Jungkook topless before plenty of times, but being this close and being in bed with him is new to you. Youâre sure itâs the reason you feel your heart rate rising.Â
âGood,â you say, turning away. âNow hide the eye candy please. Itâs bedtime, Iâve brushed my teeth and Iâm not trying to get a cavity.â
Jungkook laughs, sliding down further into the bed to cover himself up to his shoulders.Â
âTheyâre that sweet, huh?â
âIâd be disappointed if they werenât, all that time in the gym would just be a waste.â
âNow thatâs true,â Jungkook says with a smile, shifting in the bed so heâs more comfortable.
You hum quietly, staying still as Jungkook moves. Only once heâs found his comfortable position, then you do the same, turning onto your belly facing him.Â
Jungkook happens to be facing you too and he smiles sleepily as his eyes close. âGood night, Y/N.â
Your eyes remain open for a few seconds as you look at him a little longer. âMhm, night Koo,â you whisper, smiling even though he canât see you.Â
He looks pretty when he sleeps. You take in every one of his features, unaware that there is still a smile on your face as you do so.
Catching you unaware, Jungkook winks an eye open. âWhatâre you looking at, hm?â he asks softly with a teasing lilt to his voice.Â
You feel flustered, eyes going wide. âThereâs something on your face,â you say quickly, brushing nothing off of his face. âEyelash or something,â you mutter, subconsciously shifting away from him a little since the close proximity definitely isnât helping.Â
âUh-huh,â he nods, hiding a smile.Â
Youâre not sure what it is about his smile that makes your heart skip a beat and your senses go fuzzy like theyâve done so more than once now because of Jungkook. Itâs odd, heâs not doing anything different, yet you feel different. Mentally, you officially dub this The Jungkook Effect.Â
Thereâs not much you can say to defend yourself so you press your eyes shut and fight back a smile yourself. âWell, anyway, good night.â
âYou sure you wanna sleep?â Jungkook teases.Â
âOh shut up,â you say with a laugh, you pull one of the pillows out from behind your head and place it in the small space between your torsos.Â
Jungkook lifts his own head off his pillow and looks down at it with an amused smile. âIs this really necessary?â
Lifting your own head and resting on your palm, you arch your brow at him. âIâve read enough books to know what happens when two people who arenât dating share a bed.â
Jungkook mirrors your expression and dares to move an inch closer. âAnd whatâs that?â
Smiling like the little know it all you are, you answer, âThey wake up in the morning with someoneâs cute ass, which would be mine in this case, conveniently pushed up against someoneâs dick.â
Jungkook clicks his tongue and the smirk on his lips is clear as day. âAh, which would be mine,â he says, briefly looking down. His lips look wet when he says it and for some reason you find yourself wanting this conversation to continue on the same wavelength it is right now⊠but itâs also at this moment you realise youâre lying in bed and practically flirting with your best friend.
âExactly,â you say, letting out a small breath as you fall back into your pillow, looking up to the ceiling.
Pursing his lips, Jungkook hides a smile. âWell I guess we definitely donât want that to happen.â
You stifle a laugh as you lightly whack him with the pillow between you before putting it back in its place. âShut it, Jeon.âÂ
He chuckles, falling back into his pillow. âJust kidding,â he murmurs, sliding further beneath the covers and getting comfortable. âGood night, Y/N.â
With a tired smile, you hum. âGood night, Koo.â
The stops at St Tropez and Nice both pass as quickly as the first few cities in Spain and before you know it, youâve visited all the cities scheduled for France too. The stop in Barcelona has been your favourite so far though â the resort the Diamindisâ booked for the families on the cruise most definitely did not disappoint and the riding you got to do was just a big bonus, especially watching Alias struggling with his mare.Â
The whole Jungkook situation has been pretty easy to navigate too. Now that the important people in your life know itâs not real, it makes it easier and Jungkook and you only need to behave as you normally do so youâre both happy. On top of that, youâve noted that you havenât had any more experiences with the Jungkook effect, though youâre not sure you can say that pleases you.Â
Itâs also been a while since youâve hung out with Lawrence. He seemed to stay close in the first few days but you figured it must be his parents encouraging him to socialise with some of the other families since heâs not at home much. This became true enough when you saw him stuck at a table in some fancy restaurant in Nice with the Maddisonâs.Â
Although you did hope to get to spend some more time with Lawrence, at least for old times sake, you canât say you care much, especially since Sophia has finally joined you.Â
âWhy donât we go to the pool?â you say, raising your brows at Sophia. Itâs almost midnight but youâre still lounging on a quieter deck with Jungkook and Alias. Since itâs a sea day tomorrow, you donât need to be up early and it seems like itâll be more fun than the last time now that Sophia is here too.
She perks up at that, turning towards you. âItâs closed right?â
âYep, but that just makes it better,â you smile, ignoring Jungkook and Alias scoffing at your change in opinion â last time you were adamant that you should be following the rules.Â
âOkay, letâs do it.â She looks at Jungkook and Alias. âYou guys joining us?â
âSure,â Alias hops up. âItâll be fun to see Y/N break the rules,â he grins at you.
Sassing him, you get up too. âThis time Iâm pushing you in.â
âIâd like to see you try.â Alias tenses, flexing his biceps. âIâm 73 kilos of this,â he nods.
Itâs no secret that Alias has an impressive figure, but unwilling to cave, you just roll your eyes and playfully swat his arm. âWhatever.â
âAlright, letâs meet at the top deck pool in ten minutes?â Jungkook says hopping up from the lounge.Â
âMake that fifteen,â Sophia says. âI donât know where I put all my swimsuits.â
Agreeing, you all head towards the upper decks, only splitting up to go towards your respective corridors to your cabins. Sophia and Alias go right towards the corridor where their family cabins are situated, while Jungkook and you still need to walk a little further to get back to your shared cabin.
Surprisingly, itâs been easy to share a cabin with Jungkook. Most days you come back from whatever activity you had that day and knock out easily since youâre so tired. On top of that, your pillow idea seems to be working perfectly and you havenât experienced any awkward or uncomfortable moments. There have, however, been a few times youâve mistaken the pillow for Jungkook and in the split second it takes you to realise itâs only the pillow, you can swear your heart skips a beat and your pulse races. The disappointment that follows is something you canât seem to explain to yourself.Â
âSo Sophia comes and all of a sudden youâre Little Miss Daredevil, huh?â Jungkook says, as you walk together.Â
You glance at him and note how handsome he looks today. After spending some time in the sea while in Nice, his dark locks are curled and framing his face perfectly. He walks with his hands in his short pockets and the linen material of his shirt blows in the evening air giving the occasional glimpse of his lean figure. It occurs to you that this is going to be coming off in a short while when you go to the poolâ
Oop. You pause your thoughts, realising that the little flutter you just felt down south was definitely due to picturing your best friend topless. A part of you feels guilty wondering if Jungkook would be embarrassed, but you also know that Jungkook knows what you think of his physique. You pretty much said it all the other night and heâs caught you looking plenty of times before that, even making jokes about it when you did.
âShe brings out that side of me,â you sigh, smiling as you descend the steps that lead towards your corridor.
âAlias and I arenât good enough for you, huh?â
âDonât take it personally,â you joke, and Jungkook just laughs quietly so he doesnât wake up anyone as you walk past some cabins.Â
Once back at your own, you quickly change into a bathing suit and throw on a hoodie and shorts so in case any staff see you, they donât suspect youâre planning on going to the pool.
Alias is already waiting at the top deck and you can also see heâs brought some drinks along with him. Heâs chosen not to cover up and is revealing his washboard abs for the whole world to see, and letâs not forget those killer thighs of his.Â
âBeat you here,â he says without even thinking.
âWho was counting?â Jungkook says, bumping shoulders with him on purpose.Â
âI was,â Alias responds, and quickly the two resort to their childish antics as Jungkook pulls him into a headlock. You choose to sit and watch, dipping your toes in the pool as you throw your hoodie to the side.Â
âGuys, shut up, we can hear you from a mile away,â you hear Sophiaâs voice from behind you as she climbs the steps to your deck.Â
Jungkook and Alias stop mid-wrestle and you get up to pull your shorts off.Â
âHuh?â Alias frowns, pulling himself free from Jungkook. âWe?â
Once Sophia is standing on the deck, you see someone else coming up behind her.Â
Lawrence.Â
Sophia steps to the side as he steps up. âYeah, we,â she repeats.Â
âHey guys,â Lawrence says with a harmless smile, glancing across at you all.
âHey,â you smile back.
âOh, hey man,â Alias waves.Â
Jungkook smiles too with a nod of his head.Â
âI saw Lawrence on the way so I thought Iâd ask him to join us,â Sophia explains as she too pulls off an oversized hoodie.Â
âI hope thatâs alright,â Lawrence chuckles awkwardly.
âThe more the merrier,â Alias says with a shrug. âSo,â he looks at you, âwho are we pushing in first?â
âYou,â you smile.Â
Alias spreads his arms, inviting you. âIâd love to see you try, babe.â
Glancing to his right, you subtly raise your brow at Jungkook who smiles back at you. In a split second, Alias is being lifted from the ground and tossed into the pool.Â
Sophia and you jump into the pool right after, surfacing close to Alias.
âI thought we were friends,â he laughs at Jungkook splashing water towards him. âGosh, I forgot how whipped you are.âÂ
Jungkook just laughs and shrugs. âSorry, man,â is all he says.
âYou getting in?â Sophia asks Lawrence as she joins you next to the pool, dipping your toes first.Â
He nods. âI guess.â He glances around looking at the empty surroundings. This top deck is pretty big considering itâs wholly private.
âWhat?â Alias holds out his arms. âWeâre not good enough for you?â he jokes.Â
âOf course you are,â Lawrence says before he shrugs, lips curving into a smile. âI just think with all this space, we could do something more.â
âOh.â Sophia raises her brows, intrigued. âLike what?â
She speaks for all of you as you all look at him.
âI risk sounding like a five year old,â he says with a small laugh, âbut how about hide and seek.â He looks around again. âWeâre on a ship, weâve got plenty of hiding spaces.â
The rest of you glance at each other and itâs clear that youâre all in agreement.
Alias jumps out of the pool. âAlright, but itâs hide and seek chase.â He grabs a towel and dries himself off. âIâm it first,â he adds with a devilish smile.
âEven better,â Lawrence says, pleased that everyone is on board. âAre we splitting up or staying together?â
âIâll go with Y/N,â Jungkook says, approaching your side as you get up from the side of the pool. The air is chilly to your wet skin but you quickly warm up as Jungkook helps you pat dry.
âIâll stay with Lawrence,â Sophia says, walking over to his side.
âAlright letâs stick to the top two decks when hiding, but if Iâm chasing you, we can go anywhere,â Alias says, pulling on a linen tee.
âWhereâs the base?â you ask, covering yourself up too.Â
âHere?â Sophia proposes.
âOr only inside the pool,â Jungkook adds to the suggestion with a shrug.
Lawrence nods in agreement, as do the rest of you.
âAlright,â Alias smirks. âReady?â He doesnât wait for an answer before starting to count down, âone hundred, ninety nine, ninety eightâŠâ
The rest of you bolt immediately knowing that 100 seconds with Alias will only be 50, if that.
Sophia doesnât even wait for Lawrenceâs confirmation before running in the direction she came from but he follows her anyway.
With a tight hold on your hand, Jungkook pulls you in the opposite direction, already running faster than you can keep up with.Â
âSlow down,â you laugh, squeezing his hand.
âCâmon,â he says without turning back and without slowing down. âWe gotta get away first, heâs only gonna count to ten.â
Just as you suspected, even with the distance thatâs been put between you already, you can hear Alias yell out for you all to hear.
âReady or not, here I come.â
Youâre just grateful thereâs no cabins near here.Â
It feels like youâre running for a mile, starting outside before Jungkook takes you through a door and down multiple corridors and even two smaller staircases you had no idea existed. Heâs slower now which comes and a relief to you, but youâre still panting from all the sprinting.
âKoo, where the hell are we going?â you ask, tugging on his hand to make him stop.minutes, you find yourself on a part of the ship youâve never been to before.
âYouâre lost, arenât you?â you say, not really caring about being lost because youâre just glad Jungkook stopped running.
âNo, Iâve been here before.â Judging by the way heâs walking, it does seem like he knows where heâs going. âWeâre near our cabin.âÂ
âReally?â You look around, frowning at your surroundings. âI donât recognise it.â
âYep,â Jungkook takes your hand as he taps his pass on a door to go down a corridor which you still donât recognise but from the smell, seems to be near the kitchen.Â
âWait, JungkookâŠâ you pause, looking back at a small sign above where Jungkook tapped his card. Staff only. âHow?â you ask in bewilderment.
Jungkook just pulls you forward with a smug look on his face âAlias gave it to me. He got one for himself and Alex too.â
Of course he did. âHeâs trying to get us kicked off, I swear.â
âItâs just for a little fun,â Jungkook grins. âBesides, this way, we can win the game.â
âYeah, except Alias can get in here too then.â
Coming to a split in the corridor, Jungkook stops. âOh yeah,â he mumbles. âWell,Â
âHey!â
Jungkook and you both turn on the spot to the sound of a voice from ahead of you. Itâs a member of staff, the same one from the night Alias and Jungkook jumped in the pool. He seemed pretty mad at the time and seeing his expression now as he starts walking towards you, he seems the same. You donât blame him, he was chasing you guys for the better part of ten minutes.
âRun?â Jungkook whispers, his fingers clasping yours tightly.
âRun,â you nod.
Before you know it, your legs are moving as Jungkook leads you down the closest corridor.
âHey! Stop!âÂ
You almost feel bad about running away, but at the same time, you know that the guy is only trying to stop you to feed whatever power trip heâs on, so you keep running as fast as you can to try to keep up with Jungkook.
âDo you know where youâre going?â you huff, looking over your shoulder.
The guy is right behind you.Â
âNo,â Jungkook laughs, slowing down as he sees a corridor to his right.Â
âKeep going,â you laugh too, pulling him down the corridor before the guy can catch up.Â
âOi, I said stop!â he yells.
âWhat dâyou think, Y/N?â Jungkook asks, though he shows no sign of stopping. âShould we listen to him?â
âNever,â you respond, glancing back again. He seems to be slowing down but you donât stop yet. This time, you take the lead and go down a smaller corridor which you realise leads to a staircase.
âUp,â Jungkook ushers you, letting you go first. Luckily it;s a short one and Jungkook comes up close behind you.
âLeft or right?â you ask, glancing down the corridor. The left leads to a door which heads outside, the right leads to a door which seems to hide a dimly lit corridor.
Jungkook takes your hand again, going left. As he pushes the door open, you hear the guy is still coming close behind you. âStop,â he yells.
Youâre honestly surprised heâs still chasing you but youâre also tired now and really just want to stop. âKoo, I think I have asthma,â you breathe out, feeling your steps slow down.
Jungkoook chuckles, looking back at you. âY/N, weâve been through this before, you donât have asthma.â
You would pout because you know heâs righ and you still want to stop but you also donât want that guy to catch up to you.Â
Still, Jungkook glances around while jogging as though heâs looking for something. âAh, there!â
Youâre too tired to ask what, only letting Jungkook lead you across the deck to a door which takes you back inside. As you enter, you see the staff still coming behind you. Gosh, heâs bothered. After only a few yards, Jungkook uses the staff pass to open a door on your right. Inside is a small room with a few shelves lining the walls and one big one in the middle; itâs full of rescue equipment.
âWhat the hell, Koo?â you laugh, letting him take you inside as he closes the door quickly.Â
He takes you to hide behind the biggest shelf in the middle of the room. With your back pressed against it, he stands close in front of you so he can still see the door.
When you look up at him, you see a massive grin on his face and that mischievous gleam in his eyes that you love.
âYouâre crazy,â you murmur, restraining a laugh.
âShh,â he whispers, placing his hand beside your head as he takes the smallest step closer, one thatâs enough for you to feel the warmth of his breathing as his chest rises and falls so close to you.Â
The sensation makes you fall quiet anyway and youâre sure that even if you did speak, no one from outside would be able to hear you, but youâre rather enjoying the feeling of having him this close to you. The smell of his perfume â your favourite â fills you with every heavy inhale as you catch your breath too, and suddenly, you find this feeling familiar.
That damned Jungkook effect.Â
Since youâre stuck here hiding for a few moments, you can do nothing but just embrace it as it comes. Apparently youâre embracing it a little too much as you donât realise your eyes close and your head slowly moves closer to his chest. It just feels so good being this close to him â feeling his warmth, smelling him⊠his body is so close to yours, you wonder what would happen if you just took another step forward andâ
âYou okay there?â Jungkookâs voice comes out low with a humorous lilt.
ââHm?â Your eyes go wide as you realise your head was resting on his chest. âSorry,â you mumble, suddenly feeling your cheeks go warm. âIâm tired, itâs late.â
âMhm, thatâs okay.â
Looking up, you see the mischievous gleam in his eyes has changed to something playful.Â
âYou can use me as a pillow anytime,â he adds with a wink.
Scoffing, you poke him in the chest. âWell I gotta put these pecs to use somehow.â
He laughs quietly before poking his head out to the side. âCome on, I think heâs gone and weâve got a game to get back to.â
You follow him to the door and find the corridor empty, thankfully. âAlias has probably already found the other guys.â
âThat would make us the winners.â
âMm, Iâm pretty sure weâre supposed to get back to base first.â
âOh, yeah.â Jungkook pauses, looking around. âWhere is the base from here?â
âUmâŠâ Stopping beside him, you look around too. Itâs hard to tell when itâs dark but thereâs some parts of the deck which look familiar to you. âI think we keep going forward.â
âActually, I think weâve passed the way up.â
âWhat?â you frown, looking up confused.Â
âWell the pool was at one of the top decks and thereâs one way up which we missed, no?â
âI donât think so.â
Jungkook looks down at you, his brows raised. âReally?â
âReally,â you say, taking his hand to tug him along, except he doesnât move. When you look back at him, you see heâs got his brows raised with a smile, one that only spells a challenge.Â
âOh, câmon, Koo,â you sigh.Â
He shrugs before swinging your hand. âLetâs see who gets there first then,â he says in a sing-songy voice.
âFine,â you shrug, already turning away from him. âJust be careful Alias doesnât get you on your way.â
âIâll be fine, just look out for yourself,â he responds as he already starts skipping back the other way.Â
Shaking your head, you turn back to look at your surroundings. Youâre sure thereâs a small staircase somewhere near here that youâre supposed to go up which should be close to the pool. Itâs when youâre glancing around now that you realise itâs actually quite scary being alone on an empty deck late at night with no company but the sea.
Taking a few steps back, you look down the way you came to see if Jungkook might still be there but of course heâs not â heâs probably running to make sure he gets back before you.
Sighing, you continue down the path that seems familiar to you, only to hear a small bang from somewhere in front of you. Immediately, youâre relieved to see Lawrence coming around the corner ahead of you.
He smiles when he sees you. âHey,â he says, voice hushed.Â
âHey,â you answer, looking behind him. âWas that bang you?â
He looks back, confused for a split second before he nods. âOh, yeah, I just jumped down the last few steps when I was coming down.â
âRight. Whereâs Alias and Sophia?â
âWell Alias tried to get me just a little while ago but I lost him,â he says, looking proud of himself before he frowns. âWhereâs Jungkook?â
âWe split up,â you answer with a smug smile. âHe thinks the base is back this way.â You point in the direction that he went in. âBut I know itâs this way.â You point in the opposite direction.
Lawrence chuckles, looking at you somewhat endearingly though it goes unnoticed by you. âUh, Y/N, itâs the other way.â
âHuh?â you frown, looking back. âReally?âÂ
âYep,â he nods, hiding an amused smile. âI can show you the way if you like?â
Sighing in defeat, you agree to go with him. âItâs not like I have any chances of beating him now.â
âAh,â Lawrence sighs as he falls into stride beside you. âStill got the competitive streak I see?â
âMe?â you laugh quietly, glancing at him.
âMhm, you,â he says matter-of-factly, still sporting a smile.
Looking at him now, you note how relaxed and care-free he seems. Youâre not sure whether itâs because his usually swept back hair is now falling freely, or if itâs because of the glow on his face from the light sheen of sweat from the humidity of the evening air. Itâs nice to see him like this, even the smile is a difference â growing up he always seemed so mysterious and quiet which no doubt had to do with the pressure he faced as an only child and a big family name to live up to.Â
âWell, itâs good you remember. I wonât be losing today either,â you say with a playful nudge.
âOh, donât worry,â he laughs. âIf we bump into Alias, Iâm ditching you fast.â
âI hope so, youâre dead weight to me.â
âHey!â He nudges you back as he still laughs, loosely running his hand through his hair.
âMm, remember when we were kids?â you say, suddenly reminiscing. âWe used to do this stuff all the time.â
Lawrence nods. âI do,â he says with a smile. âThere was one Christmas, we all went up to that chalet in⊠oh, where was it?â he frowns, looking at you. âCourchevel?â
âHmâŠâ You shake your head as it rings a bell. âI donât think so, there was only one year we celebrated Christmas abroad all together and it wasnât in France.â
âSwitzerland?â
âYes!â You say, pointing your finger at him as you suddenly remember the finer details of the trip. âAt St Moritz, we had that massive suite at Kempinski.â
âThat's the one,â Lawrence says with a smile matching yours. âDâyou remember those nights we would always want to go out but our parents never let us? So we used to run around hiding from them.â
âMhm,â you nod. âI remember Leon and Helena would get so mad, even I was scared of them but their own kids never even cared.â
âMy parents got mad too but we still did it every night,â Lawrence laughs, his walk slowing down as the two of you approach the bow. âI wonder how he were so brave,â he continues, âI bet it was Aliasâs idea, all the fun stuff was always his idea.â
âMm, actually, I think it was yours,â you say, tilting your head towards him.Â
âReally?â Lawrence questions, brow raised as he walks closer to the ledge overlooking the tranquil evening sea though you canât actually see much besides a distant glittering coastline.Â
âMhm, really,â you nod, coming to stand beside him.
Lawrence turns so heâs facing you, a thoughtful expression on his face but his lips are still curved in a smile as they have been this whole time. âIâm surprised you remember.â
You shrug. âI remember a lot of things.â
Lawrence opens his mouth as though to say something before closing it.Â
âWhat?â you ask, turning to face him too.Â
He shakes his head. âI was about to ask something but itâs probably gonna sound stupid.â
âStupid questions are my favourite to answer,â you say with a smile.Â
He arches a brow, his smile changing to something more timid. âDâyou remember a lot about me or just everything in general?â
You laugh, not having expected that. Lawrence isnât really the conceited type so you donât think itâs coming from a place of vanity, and the shy hesitancy he says it with almost makes him seem cute â like he wants you to say him.
âBoth I guess,â you answer honestly.Â
He laughs too, one that reminds you of the days you spent daydreaming about him. It feels almost nostalgic, certainly not the same. If this was a few years ago you mightâve gotten butterflies from just hearing that laugh but now you only feel happy to see him letting his guard down and smiling which is a rare occurrence with him.
âAre you surprised?â you ask.
âWell, yeah,â he says, still with a shyness. âI thought I just went unnoticed in school.â
âUnnoticed? You were without a doubt one of the most popular guys in school.â
He shrugs. âNever felt like it.â
You scoff in amusement. âYeah, because imagine being the one to receive almost 100 cards on Valentineâs Day every year, not to mention the endless notes in your lockers.â
âAh,â Lawrence laughs softly. âOkay I see your point.â He glances towards you. âNever got one from you though.â
âI was too shy,â you say, trying to hide the truth a little with a tone of sarcasm.Â
âProbably wouldâve said yes if it was from you,â he says with a playful smirk.
âThanks for telling me this late,â you laugh. âBut waitâŠâ You look at him in amusement, having just processed some of what heâs said. âSo youâre telling me you had no idea that I had a crush on you in school?!â
Confusion is the first and only emotion you manage to catch on Lawrenceâs face, the rest passing in a second. âI had no idea!â he says, half laughing while still in what can only be surprise. âYou liked me?â He looks at you and you notice a tinge of pink colouring his cheeks.
âFor a long time,â you laugh. âThough I donât know why, you never paid me much attention until college.â
Lawrence doesnât skip a beat when answering. âI had to! Iâm two years older than you, any attention I wanted to give you throughout school mightâve just caused problems and I didnât want that for you.â
âWell, how thoughtful of you to not want me to be the subject of stupid rumours, meanwhile I was left to pine over you,â you say somewhat sarcastically but still humourful. âIf only I knew that you were being so considerateâŠâ only now do you realise exactly what it is that Lawrence has just said⊠âHang on.â You pause, brows creasing as you turn to look at him. âYou what?â
Lawrence suddenly hesitates, timidly. âI had a thing for you,â he mumbles after a few seconds.
âYou did?â
âMhm, for a while. Itâs always been there⊠still is.â
Your head is reeling⊠you couldâve had Lawrence. You still could have Lawrence â heâs telling you as much â butâŠ
âWhy didnât you ever say anything?â you ask softly, still dumbfounded.
âI wanted to,â he admits with a small smile, just about managing to look at you now. âYour first year of college, but you seemed so carefree and I didnât wanna be the older guy tying you down. Even though itâs just one year, everyone has fun in first year so I wanted you to have that too.â He purses his lips before releasing a small breath as he looks away.Â
âI wouldnât have cared about that,â you say quietly with a laugh.Â
To your relief, Lawrence laughs too, albeit awkwardly. âReally?â
âYeah,â you shrug.
âWell, for what itâs worth, I tried again in my last year, your third.â He glances at you before shrugging. âI donât think you cared for it though.â
Itâs easy to remember what heâs talking about now â thereâs no way you wouldnât remember all the times Lawrence tried to shoot his shot with you, especially because you could never figure out why you denied it to him and yourself.
Lawrence continues in your moment of silence. âI always thought it was because of Jungkook.â
All the thoughts come to a standstill in your mindâŠÂ
âNow I know I was right,â Lawrence says with a wistful smile.Â
Is this your answer? The reason you never wanted to pursue Lawrence even after having a crush on him for so long â because of Jungkook?Â
Itâs even crazier to you that right now, it doesnât seem so bizarre.Â
Jungkook has always felt right. Maybe you do care about him in more ways than you realised, maybe everything Lawrence is saying is true, and maybe everything Alex has been saying for months now is true. Thereâs obviously a reason youâve started to feel differently around him, not to mention youâre always finding any and every excuse to be with him.
Lawrence continues, unaware of the thoughts unravelling in your head. âI just wish Iâd had the courage to say something sooner, but itâs my fault.â He takes a step closer and the feeling of his hand brushing yours draws you back into this moment.Â
Looking up, you meet his gaze to see soft eyes and furrowed brows.Â
âNow itâs all out there though,â he says in a voice quiet enough to be a whisper, âI have to knowâŠâÂ
His eyes search yours and he hesitates for a brief moment before you feel his fingers lace between yours. âIt is too late, right?â
note. please interact with all parts and share your thoughts with me! <3 part 2 here
#jjk#jungkook x reader#jungkook bts#jungkook fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jeon jungkook#bts fanfic#jungkook best friends to lovers#bts fic#jungkook x you#jungkook fluff#jungkook oneshot
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janey's dad | c.h./the ghoul | part 01
â„ pairing | cooper howard/the ghoul x f!reader â„ word count | 3.7k â„ warning(s) | đ smut; age gap, hair pulling, teasing, making out, mutual pining, lipstick kink, stockings, frottage, porn w/ feelings, porn w/ plot, mild angst w/ happy ending, divorced!coop, babysitter!reader, pre-war/bomb â„ summary | âWe really, uh, shouldnât - oh fuck, you look --â â„ notes | i'm so sorry this is later than it should be. i am unfortunately a corporate slave and this fic just did not want to cooperate đ« there are a lot more things planned and this fic is turning into a bit of a beast (20+ pages and counting rip lmao) so i've decided to split it into two parts to make it more manageable for myself mostly un-beta'd atm a special thanks to @corinthianism for all her lovely help â€ïž!!
feel free to send in thots, questions, requests! | masterlist
Divorce is hard, but being a divorcé is downright hellish.
One of the ugliest things in the world, if Cooper Howard has any say. At least when he was a Marine, they told him where to point his gun, where to aim; nameless threats vanishing with a quick squeeze of the trigger.
Here, these âenemiesâ arenât enemies â not really.
Itâd be easier if they were.
Worse still, they have names he holds as dearly as his own. Thereâs Barb, whip smart and always so clever. Then Janey, the light of his life and so sweet his teeth ache.
Once upon a time, life was sweeter than apple pie on Sundays.
Then came the separation.
Afterwards, he finds it hard to look at whatâs left of his family without losing breath like a horse kick to the chest. Their absence rips open a hole inside him ten miles wide, its edges jagged and wrong.
And when he canât take the silence anymore, fingers of malt liquor help dull the ache, though itâll never be enough to mend whatâs broken.
See, warâs something he understands.
But these domestic battlefields where he sits across from his ex-wife while lawyers barter this weekend and that holiday?
How he struggles to meet his daughterâs eye every time she asks if heâs coming home?
When Barb keeps the house and the money while he keeps the scrapbooks and the dog?
He doesnât â can't â refuses to comprehend.
Because in what world can you reconcile looking down the barrel of a smoking gun only to find the woman you love staring back, finger on the trigger? Left out to hang as Vault-Tec orchestrates his downfall.
The true depth of their involvement is unknown, but itâs no coincidence his bank accounts dried up faster than the Mojave in June. The ink still wet when the media snapped up the story of his failed marriage.
Thus, his reputation (rather whatâs left of it) unraveled faster than a spool of thread.
Knocked on his ass and kept there by a boot heel crushing his windpipe. Whose? He hasnât got a fucking clue.
But whoever they are, theyâre making sure he stays a washed up nobody who struggles to land a call back, much less pay his monthly alimony on time.
See what we can do? You were Americaâs favorite gunslinger - now look at you. Mind your place.
Hell, millions used to scream his name.
Nowadays people whisper it behind their hands like a dirty secret, âOh, did you hear? Cooper HowardâŠâ as they dissect pieces of his life into bite-sized Beforeâs and Afterâs. âHah! Serves him right. Yâknow, I never liked him much.â
While he grits his teeth and swallows his bitterness with a smile, he hates how he canât protect Janey from snide reporters and nosy strangers. Juggling actor-father-divorcĂ© with fumbling hands.
Itâs only been six months; a heartbeat, a lifetime, and already heâs scraped thin like butter over too much bread.
Somethingâs gotta give.
After all, heâs only one man.
But just when it's bleakest, the clouds part.
A young woman moves in next door, the first bright thing thatâs come his way in a long, long while.
At first, he kept his distance.
Exchanged vague helloâs and how-are-youâs. Then Janey took a shine; always so friendly and eager to talk about her latest books.
Any reservations he mightâve had died when he saw how enamored you are with her.
Only made sense that over time small pleasantries turned into playdates. Then those playdates turned into sleepovers.
Before long, youâre watching her when a gig runs late.
Rustling up grub and tucking her into bed more often than not these days. And when he slinks in through the door, knees aching and stripped to the bone, there you are with a shy smile and a warm meal.
So what if he takes himself in hand after you leave, stroking his cock to the thought of you down on your knees in that pretty little sundress?
Imagines the wide stretch of your ruby lips as you swallow him down, lipstick smeared an awful mess?
Cums hard to the fantasy of your teary eyes and hiccupy breaths as you choke?
What you donât know canât hurt you.
After all, heâs a gentleman... he promises to keep his hands to himself.
âAll right, Sugar Bomb, itâs bedtime.â
Bundled in navy bedding up to her nose, Janeyâs wide brown eyes peer up at you from beneath a riot of frizzy curls. Roosevelt, her ever faithful companion, plasters himself to her side. The tip of his tail swishes once, twice before falling limp.
âAh, câmon guys. Donât look at me like that.â You sigh with a fond shake of the head, hip popping out to rest against the doorframe. âI donât make the rules, I just follow âem.â
A muffled response sounds from the lump of little girl, âNmfhm.â
Squinting, you dip your head and tap the side of your ear, "Pardon?"
âMnhfmmmm.â
âYeâeah⊠Didnât catch that, Mumbler.â
Janey tugs down the blanket, her mouth pursed in a moue of displeasure. âI said,â she crosses her arms with a huff, ânot until Dad gets home.â
Shit.
âMâsorry, baby. Heâs still gonna be a while.â Walking across the room, you stop beside the bed and motion your hand back and forth. âScooch over.â
Gangly limbs fumble as Janey wiggles into the middle of the mattress, her feet tangling in the blankets. Roosevelt takes a toe to the nose during the transition, but flops across her knees all the same.
Together they settle with a bounce of springs.
In the open space, you slide in.
The bed sinks under your weight, a plume of rich cologne tickling your nose; mint-spiced citrus. Cooper. Your stomach swoops, and your heart trips.
âI didnât see him at breakfast â or lunch!â A pout tugs at her mouth. âNot even dinner. I gotta go home tomorrow. So when am I gonna see him?â
âOh, bug.â You sigh, propping yourself up on your elbow. âYour dadâs been real busy at work. And I know thatâs been hard for you, but I promise to make sure heâs here for breakfast tomorrow.â
âDâyou mean it?â Her cold nose digs into your skin. âMe and Roosevelt miss him so much.â
Cuddled into your chest, Janey tosses an arm around your back. Her fuzzy head rests in the crook of your arm, springy curls tickling your skin.
You squeeze her tight and trace your fingertips over her forehead.
âI can do you one better,â you say, bopping the tip of her nose just to hear her giggle - a soft sound that sits warm and gooey in your chest. âI pinkie-promise.â
Her finger loops around yours, so small and fragile.
âIâll even make pancakes. Howâs that sound for a promise?â
âOh, yes, please! I think Dad will like that,â a wide yawn cuts her off mid-sentence. âHeâs sad, but he always smiles when you make food.â
Janeyâs words â unexpected as they are sudden â cut so deep it steals the breath from your lungs. You flounder, your heart a throbbing bruise in your chest.
â... Then pancakes it is.â
As if nothing happened at all, she asks, âDo I have to go to bed now?â
âAfraid so, little miss.â Your responding chuckle sounds stilted even to your own ears. âJust you wait. When you wake up, Dadâll be home.â
âFiâine, but I want extra pancakes.â Janey pauses, considers you with narrow eyes, then adds, âWith syrup!â
âWhatever you want,â you say with an indulgent smile. âNow... time to sleep. Itâs really past your bedtime.â
She gives you one last squeeze then lets you tuck her in nice and tight, blankets pulled up to her chin. You drop a kiss on her forehead while Roosevelt re-settles on the pillow beside her after a quick scratch behind the ears.Â
Everything in order, you turn to go only for a little hand to stop you.
âYes?â you reply, glancing at her from over your shoulder.
â... can you put on one of Dad's movies?â
The tremble in her voice - like sheâs about to get scolded - breaks your heart clean down the middle. Stitching on a soft smile, you nod and walk to the darkened TV set in the room's corner.
After fiddling with the nobs, static flashes to life.
âThe Man from Deadhorse okay?â
The holotape sliding into the track swallows the sound of her tiny âYeah.â Starting up with a whirl of machinery, the second-hand Radiation King flickers to life in black-and-white.
A vast plain and bright sky stretches across the screen.
Then Sugarfoot creeps into frame with the one and only Cooper Howard sitting astride the noble steed. The sheriffâs badge on his chest glints in the sun.
âThank you,â she mumbles, already half-way to sleep.
âAnything for you, baby. Sleep tight.â
Flicking off the lights, you leave the door cracked. Walk away pretending like hearing her whisper goodnight to the TV doesnât lance through you like lightning.
The desire to whisk her into your arms and soothe all of her ails is almost impossible to ignore.
Somehow, you distract yourself by wiping up the table, then by fixing a plate of dinner for whenever Cooper rolls in. Though all the while, how brokenhearted Janey sounded sits in the back of your mind like a leaden weight.
When Cooper stumbles into the living room, itâs half past midnight.
Youâd gotten up to greet him, curled as you were in an armchair reading, when something about the stern line of his mouth gave you pause.
Where the usual lighthearted greetings lingered, a pensive stillness trembled to life.
Tension crackles through the air; a held breath of agitation. By the faraway gaze and defeated slump of his broad shoulders, itâs plain to see the night didnât go as intended. And no matter how much you long to soothe, you canât.
After all, heâs not yours to touch.
Instead, you offer a sympathetic smile and ask, âRough night, huh?â
Cooper ignores the prompt, squeezing past with a brief touch to your elbow as he makes a beeline for the dry bar. The heat of his body is there and gone in a flash, his cologne teasing your senses. He says, âThought youâd be asleep by now.â
Your heart flutters in your throat. âAh,â you lick your lips, âwell, I was going to finish my chapter first.â
Humming, he turns his back to you and fiddles with high balls and decanters. The tink of crystal glassware fills the air as he speculates which alcohol goes best with his mood.Â
âThanks again for watching Janey.â He nods in approval and fixes his whiskey neat. âI donât know what weâd do without you.â
âOh, itâs no trouble, Mr. Howard.â You shrug. âSheâs a sweetheart.â
He shoots you a dry look from over his shoulder, stirring the dark amber of his drink with a forefinger. When he sucks his skin clean with a soft pop - a flash of a pink tongue taunting, teasing - your stomach swoops.
God, I wonder what else his mouth can do.
Flustered, you clear your throat and stare at a spot on the wall.
âHow many times do I gotta tell you to call me Coop?â he says, digging through some drawers until he finds what heâs searching for: a lighter. âIt must be a million and one by now.â
Flint sparks as flames jump, eating away at the end of a cigarette. Cooper inhales in short little puffs, pulling on the filter. His cheeks hollow, the shadows enhancing the cut of his jaw before the tip catches alight.
âWell,â he exhales, his gaze catching yours through a plume of smoke as he turns, brow raised. âAnything to say for yourself?â
âOld habits die hard, I guess,â you chuckle.
The corner of his mouth lifts in a lopsided smirk. âIâll drink to that.â He knocks back the last finger of whiskey before refilling with gin.
Springs groan in protest when he drops to the couch, settling in with an outstretched arm and wide spread thighs.
âItâs been a long fucking day,â he rasps.
Gulping, you try to ignore the space at his feet.
The stirrings of desire provoked by the urge to sink to your knees and fill it with your body, to ease tension from those shoulders with your hands, your mouth, your cunt â if heâd let you.
âYou heading home?â Nursing the fresh drink, he swallows a mouthful, only to hiss low through his teeth at the chemical burn. His throat bobs, framed by the open collar of his shirt. âWhew! Goddamn, thatâs strong.â
âNo, I can stay for a while.â A bird on a wire, you perch on the cushion beside him. âGot nothing else planned for tonight, anyhow.â
Cooper snorts. âI doubt that very much. A sweet young thing like you,â he motions towards you with his glass, âIâm sure youâve got plenty of fellas calling, especially on a Friday night. Donât waste your time with me.â
âThatâs not why I--â you stop yourself short.
Save for the bustling LA avenue right outside the complex, the apartment itself is stone silent for several heartbeats. Words hover on the back of your tongue, catching in the bend of your throat molasses thick.
Meanwhile, Cooper continues to swirl the alcohol in his glass.
Maybe in a different life, you wouldnât hesitate to express yourself.
But here â with him â you shouldnât.
Christ sake, heâs a grieving divorcĂ©, you chastise yourself. The last thing he needs is me trying to lay one on him.
When you speak, his name glides off your lips for the first time, clementine sweet, â... Cooper, Iâm not wasting my time. I enjoy spending it with Janey - and you.â
âWell,â he husks, hooded eyes dragging down your visage in a slow once-over, âyouâre the first one in a long while to feel that way, sweetheart.â
Dripping like honey whiskey from Cooperâs lips, the simple phrase burns its way down-down-down until it blooms like liquid fire in your belly. Warms you all the way to your toes as your heart pounds against your ribcage.
âI mean it.â Your knuckles twist in the pleats of your sundress, bolts of blue fabric bunched around your knees. âEverything I do is because I want to.â
The flash of red nails plucking at the sheer nylon of your stockings snaps up his attention, his gaze snagging - staying as he chases the curve of your exposed leg, hungry.
He wets his lips, and tenses his jaw when he spots how the soft fat of your thigh dimples in because of your garter. âThatâs awful sweet of you to say.â
You tremble beneath the intensity of his attention.
Greedy.
Little kisses of awareness spark bright along the path his eyes carve like the caress of shy fingertips.
However, before youâre able to confront him about his interest, the heat leaches from his expression, grows mute and cold like a muzzled dog.Â
Readjusting the waistband of his slacks with a tug, he says, âI know you got better things to do than keep an old man company.â
Irritation sparks. âCooper--â
âIf this is about paying you for tonight,â his lips quirk into a sheepish smile, âI wonât be able to yet.â He scrubs a hand through the stubble peppered along his jaw. âThe gig tonight didnât⊠Well, it doesnât matter.â
âNo, thatâs not what I --â
He plows on, âAnyway, the one Iâve got tomorrow should be enough. How about I stop by around seven oâclock? Iâll treat you to dinner as an apology.â
Frustration bubbles beneath the surface of your skin, antagonism thrumming through your veins. Your hands shake almost as much as your voice. âCooper!â
âI⊠uh, yes?â He blinks.
Your brows furrow. âYou donât get it,â you say. âI mean, you truly donât know?â
âIâm afraid thereâs a lot I donât get. Youâre gonna have to be more particular.â
Maybe not said in so many words (or at all) but actions speak far louder.
Otherwise, why else would you spend most of your time in his apartment, fill every spare moment with Janey, and reserve evenings for his company?
Hell, you even cook and clean!
Almost scream your interest from the rooftops, and itâs obvious to everyone but him, it seems.
Here you are thinking he was preserving your dignity whenever he ignored a passing comment or lingering touch when, in fact, heâd been oblivious to their existence to begin with.
How a man can be so obtuse when youâre throwing yourself at him is beyond you.
If he wasnât so captivatingâŠ
âAre you kidding me,â you ask, mindful of your tone, âhow could you not know?â You throw your hands in the air. âIâve been â for months!â
âWell, I donât have a goddamn clue what youâre talking about, sweetheart,â he snarks, setting his glass on the table. âCare to enlighten me?â
Fine. If thatâs how he wants to play, letâs play.
When he moves to take another drag from his cigarette, you strike, fingers locking around his wrist mid-lift. And although his glassy eyes narrow, he keeps his hand still.
Waiting to see what you'll do.
Tucking your knee under you for balance, you bend forward and watch his face from beneath your lashes. When your lips wrap around the filter, a dark hunger bleeds into his expression, his pulse a steady thud against the pad of your thumb.
Inhaling, the cherry lights up, a flashbang in the dim overhead light.
Cooperâs breath hitches, and then youâre pulling away with a lungful of smoke; the taste of ash heavy on your tongue.
He tracks your movements with greed, gaze flicking for the briefest of moments past your chin before refocusing on the ring of red lipstick staining white paper.
âIf you wanted one,â he chokes, gripping the back of the couch with white knuckles, âall you had to do was ask.â
With a coquettish grin, you exhale to the side and stare at him with hooded eyes. âIs that so?â Plucking the cigarette out of his limp hold, you stub it out in the ashtray. âWhat if I wanted to ask for something else, Mr. Howard?â
The next moment finds you deposited in his lap, his hands shooting out to grab at your waist only to freeze before they make contact.
âWoah! I--â
âTell me something.â
Your lips caress the shell of his ear, sharing breath - sharing space as you plaster yourself to his front, arms looped over his shoulders. He jolts, body trembling with restraint.
âWould you give me what I wanted if I said please?â
The distance between you snaps taut with anticipation. âC-Coop,â he stutters. âCall me Coop.â
You hum. âWell, Coop, would you?â
âThat depends almost entirely on what youâre asking for, sweetheart.â
Red nails skate along the back of his neck, play in the downy soft hair of his nape just to feel him shiver. And then youâre leaning back with your hands braced on his knees, your legs falling open in invitation.
The hem of your dress bunches around your waist, exposing the soft cotton of your underwear, and the darkened patch of slick soaking through.
âI think you know exactly what I want,â you purr. âBecause you want it too. Donât you?â
He bites down on a strangled moan when your hips arch forward, rocking the soft plush of your ass against the heavy weight of his thickening cock. The zipper digs into your skin as he tents the front of his slacks.
Mouth dropping open, his tongue flicks out to wet his lips - a slick circle of temptation that makes you clench. âI, uh, I donâtâŠâ
Reaching between your splayed thighs, you hook a finger beneath your panties and pull the fabric aside. He jerks forward, exhaling hard at the flash of your soaked cunt and twitching clit.
âCâmon, be honest.â
With a sigh, you gather your arousal on the tips of your fingers.
Cooperâs gaze is a heavy weight pinning you in place as you pretend itâs him dragging his knuckles over the top of your mond. Him dragging calloused fingers up along sticky folds to play with your sensitive clit, ripping soft little mewls from your lips.
âCanât you see what you do to me, Coop?â you say, pulling your hand away to show the webs of slick stretching between your fingers. âIâm so wet. Please, Iâve wanted you for so longâŠâ
His hips rock against your ass in an aborted thrust. âShit - shit!â Eyes slamming shut, he grits his teeth and digs his fingers into your sides hard enough to bruise. âWe really, uh, shouldnât - oh fuck, you look --â
âWhy not?â Your hand brushes over his groin. âI can feel how hard you are.â
âIt isnât right, thatâs why.â He stutters, stumbles over his words, âBesides, JaneyâŠâ
âI can be quiet,â you say, lips trembling. âI promise.â
âGoddamnit, you canât say things like that and expect me not to --â Cutting himself off, strong fingers seize your chin and tilt until youâre met with Cooperâs severe expression, his scorching gaze. âYou need to tell me now: are you sure this is what you want?â
Thereâs no hesitation, âYes.â
In what world would you refuse?
The words barely pass your lips before Cooperâs bowing his dark head, mouth ravenous as it captures yours in a slick glide of bruising lips and hungry tongues.
He steals your breath, licks into your mouth and traces along the sensitive inside of your lip.
Pulse jump starting, your toes curl over the edge of the cushion and your thighs squeeze the barrel of his chest, kneecaps digging into his ribs.
âOh,â a moan punches itself out of your throat - a breathy little thing swallowed up by his lips. âThatâs--â
Anticipation swells, simmers between you like a band before it snaps. A strong forearm locks around your waist, tugging you into the cradle of his chest until youâre plastered from stem to stern.
Too hungry for tenderness as his free hand slips up to cup the back of your head, fingers catching in the briar of your hair and tugging at the roots.
You claw at his shoulders while sparks of pain ricochet down your neck, sufficing into a prickly flush that heats your blood. âHnn, Cooper,â you gasp.
He murmurs your name through languid flicks of his tongue and sharp little nips of skin that leave your mouth tender and swollen. When he pulls away to survey his handiwork, his eyes are dark. Fathomless.
"I never thought I'd get the chance to kiss you like this," he says, wicking his thumb over the pillow of your bottom lip. "You taste as good as I imagined."
Dragging your nails across his scalp, you plead, âNo more teasing - I can't take it.â
"Well," he grunts, fingers twisting up in your dress, âIf thatâs how you feel, then you better put those hips to good use and work for it, sweetheart."
part 2 dropping soon
#cooper howard x reader#cooper howard x you#the ghoul x you#the ghoul x reader#cooper howard smut#cooper howard#the ghoul#the ghoul smut
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âlike the grass wants to grow, i want to run anywhere that you go.â
summary. 'a tiny butterfly flapping its wings today may lead to a devastating hurricane weeks from now.' or alternatively, it takes six lifetimes for you to find each other.
pairings. poly!marauders+lily x reader.
word count. 8.9k (i tried to keep it short. i really did T-T)
tags. hurt/comfort, fluff, angst, happy ending. reincarnated/regressor!reader. no specific gender described. not proofread, we die like lucerys velaryon.
cws. brief depictions of death and war, themes of mental health and trauma.
note: lmaoao, as per the poll, here is the time-traveler!reader fic! i didn't cry during the angsty parts so it's probably not that bad.
YOU WAKE UP to a familiar weathered stone ceiling, owls softly hooting beyond the curtained windows, sunken in the mattress of a canopy bed with low snoring on either side of you. Thereâs a wilting candle on your nightstand, alongside an unfastened leather journalâa whiff of spilt ink under your nose. In your limp embrace, is a plush capybara with a turtle attached to its head. The quilt blanket is entangled between your thighs, the early morning breeze flurrying past the exposed stretch of your belly where your oversized granny-square jumper has ridden up.
Itâs only then, when you try curling your fingers and wiggling your toes, that you realize that your body feels as though it had been hit by a shrinking charm.Â
You sit upright instantly, heart skipping a beat from fright.
No.
You canât have.
You reach for your brass handheld mirror, tucked away in the bedside drawers.Â
There is no way you are this unlucky.
Yet staring back at you, is your eleven-year-old self.
Naturally, you end up screaming in frustrationâstartling the robins idle on the windowsills and all but waking the entirety of the Gryffindor castle. Prefects burst inside the dormitory, wand at the ready and crust in their eyes, in search of a threat only to find you on the verge of hyperventilating.
Bloody hell.Â
Not again!Â
Merlin, Morgana and Arthurâyou are not going through puberty a sixth time.
âOh, fuck me,â you mumble defeatedly as you fall back onto the patchwork pillows. Your roommates are gawping at you in horror, the sound of heavy footfalls echoing in the halls outside.Â
Months ago, you had heard about the gruesome passing of Dorcas Meadowesâyou werenât necessarily close friends with the girl, despite being sorted in the same House, but you would grieve where grief is due.Â
YOUR FIRST LIFE came to an abrupt end at the age of nineteen, in a quaint coffeehouse where the owner knew your name and the baristas wore a sunlit grin everyday. That day, no one had expected for Death Eaters to wreak havoc in Diagon Alleyâit could have been anticipated, if only the Ministry was competent during the onset of the war. But with the extensive list of Muggleborn and half-blood casualties after that incident, Ministry officials had no choice but to restrict certain areas and propose the âlesser-breedsâ go into hiding for their safety. This alluded to many families; most condemned to be blood-traitors.Â
(There had been fleeting whispers of her dying at the wand of Voldemort himself.)Â
Then, youâd woken up in the four walls of your dormitory. The sensation of being ever-so cruelly struck by the killing curse burning in your chestâa scorching fire, yet bitterly cold all the same. You had sobbed wretchedly, curled up in a shuddering ball of tears until your roommates had called for the prefects. It got worse when they tried to console youâyou felt everything still. The panicked cries and screams of the wounded ceaselessly echoing in your head. You remembered the shards of glass sinking into your skin as you dove for cover, Unforgivables apathetically hurled in every direction.Â
It was not until Madam Pomfrey administered a Calming Draught and an elixir for dreamless sleep that you finally went out like a light extinguished.
Your second life was relatively longerâyou had spent it under the supervision of mind healers at St. Mungoâs, after all. For the next thirty years, youâd been confined to a ward on the fourth floor. (Later, you would share this space with a couple who went by the names of Alice and Frank Longbottom.) Regardless of the bleak walls, it was not so bad. The quilts were warm and the assigned matron, Madam Strout, was kind and fussed over you regularly. While the healers had done everything they could, you continued to struggle with discerning what appeared to be your âfirst life.â (Which one was your true reality? The first? Or the second?) Eventually, all the poking and prodding wore you down. Your fingertips had bruised and brittled. You could not look over your shoulder in fear of finding a Death Eater staring back at you. Night terrors plagued your dreams.Â
(Your parents who had always embraced you with loving armsâthey could not look you in the eyes now.)Â
Memories bled into newer memories as the days went by. You haunted the corridors with a plagued stare, quickly becoming a woeful canard amongst the residents of the hospital. âThe hysteric fortune teller,â they called you. You who spoke of wars and rebellion at the age of twelveâbut whose words nobody cared for when Voldemort began rising to power. You whoâd gone mad and overwrought. In the end, you believed everyone else.Â
(See? It must have been all in your headâa wayward spell that unfortunately damaged your memories.)
Youâre unsure of how you died, but perhaps, you were never even alive in the first place. There was only so much Draught of Peace you could take before you inevitably became a soulless, sleep-walking husk of a person.
You woke up in the Gryffindor tower once moreâthis time, youâre careful enough to smother your cries.  Â
If you flinched every time Marlene McKinnon coarsely bellowed Dorcasâs name in the middle of the school hallways, or if you averted your gaze at the sight of Alice Fortescue and Frank Longbottomâs intertwined handsâit was nobodyâs business but your own. In this life, you kept your head down, breezing through your homework and examsâalthough you had seen no purpose in it, at this point. Each morning that you woke up, you wondered if this was a favor from the Gods, or a relentless hell so meticulously-crafted for you. Â
(But what sins had you committed for them to spit on you as they had done? Surely, you would be granted peace after two deaths.)
You could not tell your family, nor could you ask anyone else in Hogwarts if they remembered fragments of their past livesâfor the last time you had done that, you were met with vindictive laughter and cruel gazes.Â
(At that moment, you had understood Xenophilius Lovegood a little bit more. You never knew how many sought to trample on the wallflowers of the castle.)Â
And so, youâd kept your head down until the end of your time in the castle. You stayed away from Diagon Alley and surrounding areas, and you willed yourself to perfect the art of apparatingâa skill you wished that you had learned earlier.Â
On the first of November 1981, witches and wizards had come to celebrate the fall of Lord Voldemortâwhich ultimately meant the death of James and Lily Potter. (You could not come to their funeral the first time around, seeing as you were chained to your hospital mattress that day, inebriated on the third dreamless sleep potion administered to you.)Â
Under the eyes of St. Jerome, you laid bouquets of white roses and dahlias on their tombstones.Â
âWherever your souls are now, I hope you find each other and unearth peace,â you whispered to the two names engraved on the slate, hands clasped together as you rested on the grass. The winds had been cold and biting, a testament to the looming winter that would sweep away the tears on their graves. Like Dorcas Meadows, you did not interact much with James and Lilyâbut more than anyone, you knew how death was no easy enemy to conquer.
(You hoped their orphaned son would live a life that would not take him too early.)
A few months later, you met your demise to a werewolf named Fenrir Greyback.Â
As you bled out on the grassfields, you wished for Death to come and take you faster.
When you awakened, it was in the same bed and the same dusty ceiling.Â
There was nothing you could do but go back to sleep this time around.
After dying pathetically for a third time, a stubborn part of you wanted to fight backâso you did.Â
Unlike your previous lives, you joined the Dueling Club, supervised by Professor Flitwick himself. Your wand work was clumsy and you stumbled on your incantations. You could not lift your wand without remembering a coffee shop laid to ruin and wreckage or the hardened gaze of Greyback as he sank his teeth into your neck. The times were merciless, your dance with Death even moreâbut you would not die helplessly again.Â
As you lay in your bed, muscles aching from dueling practice, you had realized one thing.Â
You did not want to stain your hands with the blood of anotherâhaving grown tired of the Reaper and his antics. If the Gods would not let you rest, then you would not let them take anyone else.Â
After all, you had the stubbornness of a Gryffindor lion.Â
For the next six years or so, you devoured your textbooks on charms and healing spells, refining your spellwork until your tongue grew numb and your wrists became sore. When the time came, you followed James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Lily Evans, and many more, in joining the Order of the Phoenix. (Perhaps you should have realized earlier that you all were just wide-eyed children on both sides, forced to partake in a war that should have never been yours to fight.)Â
The First Wizarding War transfigured the years into a blur of mourning, surviving, and fighting in alleys now-bloodied. Even the sun hid behind the clouds, for brothers began turning on one another. You could only find solace in the fact you had kept Dorcas away from Voldemortâs clutches, volunteering to go in her stead during incursions, and Marlene McKinnon alive for another day to see her family.
But for how long could you cheat fate?Â
Hours before your death, you found yourself in a forest clearing. The campsite was filled with witches and wizards afflicted with severe hexes and cursesâa few of Dumbledoreâs best fighters screaming in agony from the Cruciatus.Â
There you found Remus Lupin, bruised and worse for wear, attempting to wrap a bandage around his shoulders in an empty tent.Â
âYou look like youâve seen better days,â you said in a soft greeting, stepping inside the tent with a forced smile, your collection of potions and jars of herbal pastes jostling in your leather satchel.Â
Remus chuckled tiredly. âHavenât we all?âÂ
You gently pried the bandage from his trembling hands and maneuvering yourself at his back. You stifled the urge to cry at the sight of his scarsâso violently red against his pallid skin. Compared to your previous lives, you had developed a friendship with Remus and his group of bold maraudersâa camaraderie as true as it could be in dire times. (And if providence had been kinder, you could have dared to want more than just friendship.) You poured drops of Dittany onto his shallower wounds, murmuring empty words of comfort as he flinched and hissed.
âItâs Peter,â he rasped, abruptly holding onto your wrist as you turned to leave. âHeâs been missing for hours. Please. I donât know what Iâd. . . what Iâd do if. . . if. . .â
You squeezed his hand. âIâll find him, Remus. Donât worry.â
True to your word, you had found Peter at sundown deep within the forest. There was an unsettling quietude that hung in the air as you trudged to his side. He was kneeling on the muddy ground, head hanging low. Itâs only then that you noticed the body laying still in his arms. Violent chills slithered down your spine as you recognized the woman in his embrace.Â
âMary!â you cried out, hurrying to them as fast as you could.Â
âWhat happened?â you asked frantically, hands in a desperate search for a pulse. When you were met with no answer, you pressed again more heatedly. âPeter! Look at me!â You gripped his chin, heart hammering in your chest. âYou have to tell me what happened! I canât. . . I canât help her if I donât know what hit her.â Droplets of tears fell from your eyes down to Maryâs pale cheeks. âI canât. . . I needâplease. . .â
Bloodshot eyes stared back at you. âI. . . I didnât want to do it.â
âWhat?â
âIâm sorry,â he croaked, burying his head into the crook of Maryâs neck. âI was so, so scared.â
âPeter, what are you talking about?â You grimaced impatiently when Peter lifted his gazeâbut he was not looking at you, rather behind you.
The answer to your question was a killing curse to the back.
An unseen rustle in the bushes that you should have paid attention to, a cloaked figure darker than any shadow; a Death Eater thatâd come to ensnare you in a perfectly-laid trap.Â
(Damn it!)
(Damn it all to Hell!)
You awoke to the sound of your screaming and your limbs thrashing in the bed youâve grown to despise. There was nary a remorse in your body as your roommates wailed at the sight of your nails drawing blood from your arms. Later that morning, the common room would be filled with talks of your faraway gaze and your scratched-up flesh.Â
You could not take it anymore.
In your fifth life, you had sought peaceâor rather, the most beautiful mockery of it.Â
You decided to give up your magic to chase a semblance of normalcy. No more wands, no more moving portraits, no more jinxes and pranks, no more owls and wizard robes. Most of all, no more war. (âBut it did not work like thatâ, Death laughed.) In this life, you wanted what was denied of you in the previous ones.
A family.
A happy ending.
Bitterly enough, the Gods saw fit to give you only one of the two.Â
You married a Muggle, to your parentsâ dismay. He was nice and compassionateâa distant contrast to the ongoing turmoil of the wizarding world. But you could not bring yourself to feel guilt. You had been stripped of everything, which included the privilege to die and lay your soul to rest in perpetuity.Â
(Who were you, if not a dead man walking?)
Over the years, you would have three children with your husbandâthree beautiful children born from love, in a world that would not actively seek to take them from you. You raised them all to adulthood, hoping they would not fault you for finding relief at the lack of magic in their veins. Their names were Kinsley, Piper, and Averyâand you had adored every inch of them, from their striking eyes to the tips of their stubby fingers.Â
On your deathbed, you were surrounded by your grandchildren and your great-grandchildren. An image you held close to your heart as your vision began to deteriorate.Â
Just this once, you prayed to all that would hear.Â
Let me die surrounded by my family.
At the age of ninety-one, you drew your final breath.
And when you opened your eyes, you were back in Hogwarts for the sixth time.
TO SIRIUS BLACK, you are a curious little wallflower, albeit a withering oneâyou who blend among the crowd, with a sad gaze in your eyes and the fretful twisting of your fingers. He doesnât know why heâs particularly drawn to youâbut perhaps he understands, more than anyone, the hesitance of taking up space in fear of punishment for one wrong move. But you look so lost, meandering along the corridors like the ghosts of the castleâbut even the spirits seem more alive and colorful than you.Â
âWhat is it that they have taken from you?â Sirius wants to ask.Â
(What judgment has fate placed upon you soâfor you to cry each morning?)Â
There is a raging urge in his veins to reach over and wipe your tears away, but what can he do as a stranger, if not watch powerlessly as you fade into the background?Â
His fingers feel like they might fall off if they do not entwine with yours. He wants to offer up his shoulders to carry the burdens that weigh down on a creature as lovely as you.Â
There are times when he and the other Gryffindors catch you crying at the long tables of the Great Hall.Â
âO-Oh, was I?â Your reply is quiet. Resigned. Sirius has never felt his heart break more than in that moment. You move to weakly swipe at your tears. âSorry, I didnât mean to. . .âÂ
âItâs alright, really,â Lily says, her voice strained, the words lodged in her throat. Under the table, she seeks Jamesâs hand for comfort. (How can someone appear to be so lonely and defeated?) âWe all have those days.â
âYes.â You blink away the fresh tears pricking at your eyes, mindlessly pulling at the threads of your woven bandages, a weary chuckle falling from the cracked skin of your lips. âExcept, it seems the days never end for me.â Â
Lily stays silent.Â
Sirius shares a look with Remus from across the table, an unspoken question hanging between the animagus and the werewolf.
How do their voices call out to the one who so faithfully believes that the world has abandoned them?
But Sirius Black is determined and unyieldingâwhat good of a prankster would he be if he could not bring a smile upon your beautiful face?Â
He gets his chance during Transfiguration class, when McGonagall instructs the class to pair-up for an activity in turning miniature statues into birds. Predictably, you donât move a muscle, staring ever-so intently at the sights beyond the classroom windows that you donât notice the professor observing you worriedlyâher lips tightly pressed and her eyes wrinkled with concern. Sirius slams his buttocks onto the wooden chair next to you; the sound of chair legs screeching bounces off the cobblestone walls.
âHullo, partner.â Sirius grins as he offers you an enthusiastic wave, his dark curls floundering with his energy. He feels the gazes of his best mates boring into his back, but decides to ignore it for nowâRemus can live without him for one class. In his mindâa perfectly-reasonable logic for an eleven-year-old, mind youâhe figures that you would find class more entertaining if you had the right company. And, Sirius is wonderful company.Â
You stare at him with furrowed brows and Sirius wishes nothing more than to bring fire to your eyes. âPartner?â you repeat, a tinge of confusion in your voiceâa deafening cadence to his ears, as for once, it is not desolation that laces your words.Â
âPartner,â Sirius affirms with a nod of his head, barely paying heed to McGonagallâs directions at the front of the roomâbut noting the mention of a prize for the pair who would successfully cast the spell for longer than ten minutes. He takes your silence for uncertainty, and replies with a light-hearted scoffâfinding the pout on your lips adorable. âIâll have you know Iâm a bloody master at Transfiguration. Not even James could match me in this classâokay, maybe he could, but thatâs not important, is it? Point is, with me at your side, Minnie will have no choice but to give us a hundred points!âÂ
From the frown on your lips, Sirius gathers that youâre unimpressed by himâa first, but not a total setback.Â
He seizes the small box of porcelain figurines before you can blink, a wry smile on his face as he wrangles a boastful laugh from his throat. âReady to have your mind blown? Iâve been practicing this spell since last night. Thereâs no way Iâm getting this wrong.âÂ
âOh, Iâm Sirius Black, by the wayâat your service.â He holds out his hand for you to shake, wondering what your palm would feel like in his. Cold? Warm to touch? Or, perhaps, a perfect fitâjust as Lilyâs hand feels laced with his?
He doesnât find the answer to his question. Instead, you draw your wand from your robe pocket, and point the tip of the wood at the earthenware at Siriusâs grasp.Â
âAvifors,â you recite delicatelyâsuch a flawless incantation that Sirius hears Merlin himself weeping in the depths of his grave.Â
The figurine grows feathers and a beakâSirius and the rest of the students can only watch as the weebill flutters its wings and soars through the roof.Â
Heâs stupefied. Breathless, one might say. But not because of your little trickârather, the growing smile on your lips as you watch the bird fly across the room. Your eyes flicker with mischief, and like a man on the edge of a cliffâwhat is Sirius Black to do, but fall?Â
THE END OF YOUR first-year at Hogwarts draws near, and so does the springtimeâa coveted season for lily flowers to bloom. The April winds find you out by the lake edge, swinging your legs idly on a marble stone bench where the cypress vines grow along the cracks. Songbirds fly overhead as the daylight glistens on the surface of the Black Lake, a beech tree in the near distance, butterflies dancing past the gnarled trunk. Pollen floats like dust in a cupboard under a staircase. Ducklings waddle after their mother as riverine rabbits scurry on into the tall, purple nettles. On days like this, you find it easier to settle into your new lifeâbut, perhaps, you have your friends to thank for that.Â
Yet, as you find yourself wanting to reach out to their outstretched hands, flashes of children with your hair, your eyes, cheekbones whittled to resemble your own, haunt you. Their pure and gentle temperaments, painfully akin to their fatherâs. You mourn them every day. Their names are forever inscribed in the locket of your soul. (You did not find it fairâyou who live again, and they who disappear forever. An existence that would cease to beâall because you fear what awaits you in this life. Why must it be you who should walk this land with a body scarred by wounds no one else can see? Why must it be you who mourns the loss of your family, your friends, and all your loved onesâeveryone murdered by the Gods who spit on the five graves with your name written on it? Why? Why?)
Do you dare to live a life without them? Is it fair to deprive them of a chance of being a family while you waste away on the Isles? You may have lived multiple lifetimes, but not once have you been given the answers you seek.Â
You will not find happiness without them; it is as you deserve.Â
(For why else would Death torment you so if you are seen as innocent in their eyes?)
âHow did I know Iâd find you here?â A sing-song voice emerges from the trees, and youâve no need to turn your headâthe sound of Lilyâs bright cadence is one youâre familiar with. But, somehow, youâve grown fond of her voice, more acquainted with her smile and laugh than youâve ever been in the last five lives. (You have to wonder if this friendship is one youâre permitted to enjoy.) Her grin is blinding, more so than the afternoon sun behind her. Lilyâs wavy hair falls over her shoulder as she plops down on the empty space beside you. âWe didnât see you at lunch today,â she says, looking ahead, the warmth of her hand inching closer to your own. âI figured you didnât want a bunch of whiffy boys around.â
Then, she looks around, searching for any prying ears, a stream of giggles falling from her lips. âAlthough, I must warn youâtheir pockets are loaded with food stolen from the hall, saying theyâd give it to you when you returned to the tower. But I think Minnie caught onto them.â She chortles, a fond gaze in her eyes.Â
You hum in thought, a smile unknowingly pulling at your lips. âThank you, Lily. Itâs sweet of you to come and find me.âÂ
She harrumphs light-heartedly, snootily lifting up her nose. âDonât get too used to it. Weâre only just best friends, after all.â
A silence encompasses the two of you, sitting under the shade, pink fingers shyly intertwined. Lily allows the minutes to flow by like a breeze on the waters, until she stares at you with thick emotions flickering in her emerald eyes. She nibbles on her bottom lip, long lashes kissing her eyelids. âAre. . . Are you alright? Is it one of those days again?â
You grin at her question, impishly nudging her legs with yours. Itâs a gesture you deeply appreciateâbefriending you and growing closer to you in ways you imagine are never in your cards. But Lily is only eleven, and you will not act upon your selfishness. (But, maybeâjust maybeâyou are allowed to relish in their company until you are called once again to your deathbed. In the next life, they might not know your name as they do now, and the revelation frightens you immensely.)
âIâm okay,â you say, a gnawing lie that sounds unconvincing to even your own ears. You stare at the flock of swans diving in the lake. âI was just missing a few friends back home.â You remember the toddlers that you used to call your ownâtheir spittled possessiveness toward anyone who dared to snatch your attention away from them. âI donât know if they would be happy with me going off on my own adventure,â you say, sparing Lily a knowing look. âThey areâermâMuggles.âÂ
âOh.â Lily nods, mulling over your words. âTuney. . . my sister. She sort of resents me ever since I left for Hogwarts. We live a world apart, and it barely helps that she ignores me during the holidays.â She sighs, averting her gaze elsewhere, a grimace pulling at her mouth. âSometimes I wonder if all of this was never meant for me. That I was just a fluke. Why do I have magic and not her? Any day now, I expect for McGonagall to come and ask me to pack my bags and head straight home.âÂ
âBut,â says Lily, her eyes resolute and her fire unwavering, âuntil that day comes, I will enjoy every bit of this world as I can. Tuney will just have to deal with that.â She offers you a mellow smileâa likeness to a kind husband that you had once in a past lifetime. âBesides, I think those who truly love us will understand the paths we must take. Even if it means parting ways for a long time. Your friends will not blame you; theyâll want you to live truly and freely.âÂ
Her words sink deep into your bones, and you canât help but let out a hearty laugh. You simper at the confused tilt of her head. âWise words, Lily Marie Evans. Are you sure youâre only twelve?âÂ
Lily beams. âMum likes to tune into the Sunday motivational-talk channels.â
(âThe ones we love never really leave us, do they?â Sirius Black will tell you one day, when youâve bared to him the truth of your lives, and he looks at you no differently than he has beforeâwith all the adoration and fondness of his heart.)
Later, before you and Lily make your way back to the castle, you pick three flowers among the chicory weeds. She stays behind as you kneel by the riverside. For the children you have loved, and will continue to love for eternity. Droplets of tears fall onto the water, joining the floating blue petals. âIâm sorry that I cannot find you as you are,â you whisper, a heavy weight lifting from your shoulders. âBut I hope that we meet again in this life, whichever names you may take.âÂ
(After all, what love is stronger than one that perseveres across endless lifetimes?)
You carry them in your heartâletting cherished memories remain as such. Otherwise, youâll be chasing what can never be again. It would be an injustice to their names to try and replicate a shallow imitation of them. They deserve more than thatâto be treated like a pawn in Deathâs game. They were alive and you will honor them befittingly.
You bid them goodbye and allow the tethers of their soul to untangle from your grasp.Â
It is the most difficult farewellâand yet, the easiest act of mercy you have ever carried out.
âTHE FLAP OF a butterflyâs wings can evoke a hurricane in the next world over.âÂ
This is a phrase youâve come to be familiar with over the span of your numerous lives. It has never been truer than the moment you step outside the infirmary to find a group of mismatched Gryffindors waiting for you in the halls. Their heads snap in attention at the sound of your footfalls. In an instant, youâre crowded with their questions and worriesâbut you find it endearing, the way your friends fuss over you. Itâs certainly a welcome change from a past spent by your lonesome in the castle. (You only wonder what makes this life so different from the rest? Why is everything changing without you noticing? What will be taken from you for this deviation in time?)Â
âHow did it go?â James asks, now seventeen and captain of the Quidditch team, wavy tendrils of brown hair swooping over his round glasses. The broad of his chest fills out his red and yellow jumper, crocheted by Lily over the yule breakâthe five of you, including Peter, Marlene, Mary, and Dorcas, have matching sweaters as well.Â
Except, you like to tease them with a jest that Lily made yours with the most loveâas no one else had the pattern of a capybara with an apple on its head.Â
âWell enough,â you answer, patting his shoulder with a tired smile that reaches your eyesâfor how could one not cheer up in the face of James Fleamont Potter? That would be saying the skies do not brighten in the company of the sun.Â
By incontestable decree of Poppy Pomfrey, the headstrong matron of the castle, you are required to meet with a mediwitch from St. Mungoâs twice a week, since the start of your fifth-year. Healer Robbins floos to Hogwarts on Wednesdays and Saturdays to check up on your health, physically and mentally. Of course, you donât divulge anything about your time-traveling dilemmas, lest you end up confined to a hospital ward again for the rest of your years. But you do end up addressingâalbeit, begrudginglyâthe dried tear stains on your pillowcase every morning, your wayward habit of purposefully missing meals, or your tendency to withdraw yourself from your peers on certain daysâwhich coincidentally happen to be the anniversary dates of your deaths. (If no one would grieve for you, then youâd do it alone.)Â
Whoâd have thought that healing would be much more tortuous than hurting in the quietude of your room?
But one thing is for certainâthis is a suffering you will endure with greed and hunger.Â
For todayâs session, Healer Robbins suggests you proactively live in the present moreâwhich is easier said than done.Â
âAlthough, she did tell me to stop slouching all the time,â you inform James, scrunching your nose in feigned offense, to which he replies with a hearty chuckle, pulling you into his embrace for a side hug. You burrow your nose in his scent of oakmoss and orris root, a lingering touch of broom polish as wellâyou feel the warmth of his hand splayed out on your back, and hide your grin into his chest.Â
âWell, someone had to tell you,â says Regulus Black with a scoff, arms crossed over his chest, yet no genuine heat in his trenchant eyes. He looks pleased that you return unharmed from your meeting with Healer Robbins. Funnily enough, youâve no doubt that the famed Black temper would emerge should you utter so much as a single word against the mediwitch. (You like her, though. Some days, Robbins lovingly spiels about her clumsy-footed wifeâand in return, you talk about your sad feelings. Eurgh. Talk about a fair exchange.)
Among the many divergences in this life, one of them is the unforeseen friendship you have forged with Regulus Arcturus Black. But that story begins with Xenophilius Lovegood, when you stumble upon him in the Forbidden Forest chasing after a family of bowtruckles with a fervid expression and a journal in one hand. You protect him from foul-mouthed Ravenclaws, and he allows you to tag along in his woodland escapadesâincluding a lifelong access to the kitchens beyond curfew. His lack of regard for personal safety is both endearing and maddening, you realize early on. One stormy night, you chase Xenophilius into the forestâhe is barefoot, following the Mooncalf hoofprints, as you spit out strings of expletives and mouthfuls of rain. That is where you find Regulus, groaning in pain and carrying a burden that is much too heavy for a fifteen-year-old.Â
Then, a year later, they decide to give you a heart-attack when you discover that Pandora and Xenophilius have taken Regulus under their wingâfiguratively and literally. And, most of all, romantically.
Youâre more speechless than Sirius had been when you catch him one fateful evening.
(âDonât do it, Sirius Black,â you greet, startling the ebony-haired boy as you step out from the shadows. The common room is silent, save for the crackling embers in the fireplace. You stare at the sixteen-year-old with a vehement resolve, your hands curled into fists. If there is one fixed event you had to live through over and over again, it is the news of Severus Snape being nearly mauled to death by a creature so feared and gruesome. You will not let it happen in this life. His eyes flicker with shame amongst a sea of gray, and he knows that you know about his abhorrent idea of a âprank.âÂ
You sigh, taking another step forward, hand coming to rest on his tense shoulder. âLet it go, Sirius. Itâs not worth it. Bringing someone to harm is never worth it. If he dies, his blood will be on your handsâand you donât want that, trust me. Be kind to him, Siriusâand even kinder to your brother. The two of you are all each other has.â
âNot true,â Sirius whispers back, almost afraid, his fingers tracing the curve of your cheeks. âI have you, Prongs, Lily, and Rem.â
âAnd Remus is exactly who we should be with right now,â you reply with a harsh glare. âNot in the common rooms trying to one-up Snape because of some childish rivalry.â With a long sigh and a shake of your head, you push back the dark curls from his face. âThe times are cruel, Sirius. We must hold onto what we can.â
His forehead will fall onto your shoulder, and your shirt will be soaked with his tears, but you realize that you will hold him, and all those whoâve captured your heart, until Death himself pries you away from their embrace.)Â
But, it all pales in comparison to the horror in Siriusâs eyes when you point at Regulus and Peter, as you utter with absolute conviction, âThey are my dearest friends.â
While Peter may have been a traitor in another life, a murderer with blood and guilt staining his handsâhe is only a skittish boy in this one. A timid student who hides behind the shadows of his friends. You will not let him go down that path again. The Peter Pettigrew you currently know is a mousy little thing, pun intended, who sneaks in a pouch of sugared jelly worms in the library for you and him to enjoy whilst copying off each otherâs Arithmancy homeworkâyou two automatically get perfect marks, seeing as youâve went through school multiple lifetimes already. Truthfully, when you see him tongue-tied before Mary Macdonald, you canât envision anything else than a lifeless body and a man apologizing for his sins. But it is hardly fair to condemn Peter for the sins of a life he has not livedâand will never live through, if you have anything to say about.Â
A lion protects their pride, and that is what you shall do. Even if it tears you apart in the process. (Healer Robbins wonât be so pleased about that, though.)Â
But, perhaps, the most unexpected surprise youâve received this year isâshockinglyânot the news of Dorcas and Marlene dating, and neither is Alice and Frankâs relationship as you have already known that since your first life. It is James, Remus, Lily, and Sirius announcing to the world, with a poorly-written poem for a gnome to recite on Valentineâs Dayâcourtesy of James Potter himselfâthat the four of them are in love. In all five lives, that has never happened. Not even Lucius Malfoy can call into question the genuineness of their devotion to one anotherâand he will not dare to do so in your presence, otherwise heâd find himself at the mercy of you and Narcissa Black.
The four of them are happy as one, and you would die to ensure they stay together until the end of their time. Dark lords be damned.Â
An even bigger shock comes when their affection for each other unspokenly extends to you. Not in a manner that equals their rambunctious gesturesâbecause the Marauders donât do anything half-arsed. (And if they fall in love, they fall without fear.) But in a way that is quiet yet intense, ever-so mindful of your wallsâwith an intention to break them down slowly and only with your utmost permission. They leave you confused with each day that passes. (You fear that they think you pitiful for having not found a significant other.)
(For months now, your heart is set aflutter just by the sound of their voicesâif they look at you as a token charity case, it would tear you apart.)Â
Forehead kisses, hand-holding in the corridors, late nights in the kitchenâtipsy on gillywater and the scathe of each otherâs touch. Picnics by the lake, bodies intertwined where no one knows where they begin or end. Ventures in the library where not a soul is paying attention to the passages of their textbooksâhushed giggles turning into unrestrained laughter until Madam Pince rounds the corner and has you all thrown out. (How long has it been since you felt so free?) Itâs the little things, like your fingers brushing against theirs as you walk side-by-side, or the soft glint in their eyes as they stare at you from across the roomâas though you are a jewel to behold.Â
It is one thing to know that you are living a life after lifeâbut it is another thing entirely to feel alive when they are nearby.Â
You are alive when Remus relaxes on the carpeted floor of the Gryffindor tower, and as you lay on the velvet couch, he draws protection runes on your palm with his finger. When he thinks youâre asleep, he presses a kiss to the back of your hand. When the nights are unbearably long and you find a safe haven in his embrace, and he in yours.
You are alive when James cages you in a bear hug after an intense Quidditch match against Slytherin, limp tendrils of hair clinging to his sweat-soaked skin, pressing a series of fervent kisses to the side of your head until his voice is louder than the cries of victory coming from the cheering stands.Â
(âLay back down, James Fleamont Potter,â you command tersely as you push him onto the infirmary bed. You narrow your eyes at the bandages wrapped around his arms and neck, as though itâd personally wronged you. âDonât even think about getting up,â you quickly add when you notice his droopy eyes staring at the doorsâwhere Sirius, Remus, and Peter have gone off for a night of mischief. With an exaggerated sigh, James will roll his eyes before pulling you into the bed with him.)Â
You are alive when Lily scours the Great Hall in the mornings, hair fussed from sleep and her face bare, and when her eyes finally land on youânone misses the way she lights up blindingly, as if she were a poppy flower emerging from the forest floors and all her petals are curling towards the sun. She bounds over to you with a smile that draws everyone in the room to her. And your heart will have no choice but to swell three times its size when Lily falls asleep mid-meal, snoring with her neck bent and a spoon dangling from her mouth.Â
You are alive when Sirius dashes across the room to claim you as his Potions partner. Heâll spend the rest of the class with a triumphant grin on his faceâsitting on a rickety chair as he lazily admires the view of your backside. And may the Gods help the poor soul who dares to question your work.Â
(âSee that lovely creature over there?â Sirius will say with a dangerous lilt to his voice, pointing to you whoâs quite busy squabbling with Severus and Barty Jr. over frog legs. âThey will be the greatest apothecary to ever walk the wizarding worldâso watch your tongue, mate.â)Â
They are your limbs, the blood in your veinsâthe ache in your heart. The fires of your soul. And when they are near, you are finally whole. (Healer Robbins certainly wonât like that, eitherâbut this is a thought you shall selfishly keep for yourself.)Â
That is why you had come to a decision at the beginning of the year.
âI need to tell you all something,â you say, breaking out of your stupor and finally meeting everyoneâs eyes. You meet Siriusâs gaze from where he leans against the wall, his attention on youâand only you. You reckon he notices the way youâre fidgeting nervously with your fingers, gnawing on your lip as you suck in a deep breath. Itâs similar to the way he acted when he first told the group about his intentions to run away from his mother. Healer Robbins told you earlier to not dwell on the pastâitâs only a thing that time-travelers do, she had said. You suppose thereâs no better way to exercise honesty than to tell your loved ones about the secret you have been keeping for the last five lifetimes. You just hope they wonât look at you differently when all is said and done.Â
Marleneâs gaze worriedly flickers from you and to the infirmary doors. âHas the mediwitch said something?âÂ
You shake your head. âThereâs something you should know about me.â
Like a badly-written joke, a pack of lions, a snake, and a badger follows you into an empty classroom. They watch with furrowed brows as you cast a silencing charm over the room. You feel the weight of their curiosity as you take a seat in the center, drumming your nails on your lap as everyone moves to do the same. Remus wordlessly takes the seat next to you, as though being by your side is a natural phenomenonâlike the shores never straying from the sand. He gives your hand a gentle squeeze and you return his kindness with a weary smile. You look at the protective circle thatâs somehow formed around you. Marlene, Dorcas, Mary, Xenophilius, Regulus, Lily and the Marauders. (Since when did you gain a family like this in such a short time?)Â
âWhere do I even begin?â you ask with a shuddery breath. âIt might get a bit intense. . . and sad, and I wouldnât want to overwhelm you. So itâs okay if you arenât prepared to take this all in yet. Iâd understand.âÂ
âWhat one of us goes through, we all go through together,â Dorcas vows with her head high. âItâs not the first time weâve done this, love,â she says, looking at everyone else in the room. âWeâre here for you. Always have been. Itâs what friends are for, arenât they? You taught us that. Let us return the favor now.âÂ
You laugh wetly, eyes crinkling with gratitude. âI suppose youâre right.âÂ
There is no time like the present.
And if all goes awry, you probably might just jump out of a window and reset everything. (You wouldnât, really. This life is precious to you more than anything in the world.)
You close your eyes and draw air into your lungs.
No time like the present.
âWhen I first died, I was only nineteen.â Despite the pinched expressions and soft gasps, you force the words out. You have to. Otherwise, the tale of your lives will be buried with you forever. This is the first time you have ever said the words aloud. Itâs both exhilarating and terrifying. âDeath Eaters came to Diagon Alley. It all happened so fast, next thing I knew the killing curse was cast straight at me.âÂ
Regulus flinches, and you offer him an apologetic grimace.Â
âBut that wasnât the end,â you continue amidst their horrified wide-eyesâfeeling Remus tighten his hold on your hand. You chuckle bitterly. âIf it had been, maybe it all wouldâve hurt less. When I woke up, I was back in the Gryffindor tower.âÂ
âWhat?â Lily frowns as a shadow is cast over her eyes. âBut how?âÂ
âI wish I knew,â you reply with a lodge in your throat, eyes thick with incoming tears. âI really wish I knew. But I woke up back in Hogwarts. I was alive again. Somehow, someway, I was alive. But I was dying.â You shut your eyes, head craning to the ceilings as you swallow back a sob. âHave you felt what itâs like to be burnt alive? Thatâs what the killing curse is like. And I feel it everyday. When I told the nurses this, I was sent straight to St. Mungoâs. They could not heal what was not found in my body. They called me mad. And there was nothing I could do but believe them. It was like that until I died on an infirmary bed, leather straps around my wrists and legs, forbidden to leave the ward and feel even the sunlight on my face. I was deemed a threat to the others and myself.âÂ
Lily beats you to the punch and cries into her handsâthe harrowing sound torn from her throat. Mary, with her own stream of tears, pulls Lily into a hug.Â
âI-I told you it was ugly,â you say timidly, averting your gaze out of remorse. âWe can stop here if youâd like.â
âWeâre staying,â says Lily with a guttural edge to her words, eyes quickly growing red.Â
âThen, in my third life, I died by a. . . Greybackâit was Greyback who killed me.â You intertwine your fingers with Remusâs, whoâs gone ashen from the reveal. âItâs alright.â
âThe bloody hell do you mean itâs alright?â James bellows, running a hand through his hair as he tears himself from his seat, chest heaving up and down. âNone of this is alright! How could you say that? We. . .We should tell Dumbledore or somethingâor anyone! This shouldnât have happened to youâitâs just too cruel. . .âÂ
âI know,â you acquiesce with a low hang of your head. âI know.â
Sirius exhales jaggedly. âWas that the last of it? Of your. . . your deaths?â
âNo.â You stare at him with regret. âIn my fourth life, I died in a Death Eater ambush.âÂ
Xenophilius looks like he might faint any second.Â
âBut in my fifth life, I met some people in the Muggle world,â you explain, remembering kind eyes and wide smiles, a family made in a home far away from magic and wars. âI loved them dearly. When I thought I was being punished by Gods, they gave me peace. They taught me unconditional love and I. . .â You let the tears drip onto your skirt. âI might never find them again, but Iâll never forget them for as long as I live. It was the only death given to me without pain.â
You watch as Lilyâs doe-eyes flicker with realization. Three flowers in a watery grave.Â
âAnd here I am now. The end,â you say, forcing a crooked grin as you brush the dust off your school robes.Â
No one moves a muscle for the next few minutes.Â
You freeze in fear.Â
(Have you upset them? Do they see only a talking corpse now?)
The room is suffocatingly quiet and you canât bear to see the pity or judgment in their eyesâso you run out of the room as though Death himself was hot on your heels.Â
They are right behind youâof course, they are. (Where a part of their soul goes, they will follow.)
âAre you angry?â You quietly ask, wrapping your arms around your waistâafraid to turn around and face them. âI would not blame you if you are.âÂ
âNo, not mad. Never.â Lily falls into place by your side, hovering but never stepping past your erected borders. âMaybe at the circumstances. Itâs all so unfair. Iâm. . . Weâre just upset that you had to live through that all alone. To die over and over. I canât imagine how much it must have hurt each time.âÂ
You nod, swallowing the urge to crumble on the floor. âThen youâll understand why. . . why you and Iâall of usâI canât be with you.â
Remus frowns, stepping forward to reach out to you. âWhat?âÂ
âDonât make this any harder than this has to be, please,â you beg, voice hoarse and hands trembling.Â
âWhat the hell are you talking about?â Sirius presses further, a bitter acid to his words. He looks frightened, almostâguilt instantly pools in your stomach. Â
âDonât you see? Everything is changing!â You exclaim, grateful that youâve chosen the abandoned corridors of the castle where no one dares to venture on a sunny day. âI canât protect you if I donât know whatâs to happen next! Iâd rather die again than let any of you get hurt.â
âThen donât!â shouts James, veins straining against his neck, tears of his own glistening within his hazel eyes. âI would rather die than pretend none of what I feelâwhat we feelâfor you isnât real.âÂ
âYou donât know what youâre saying, James,â you retort with a sharp scoff. âIâve no need for a relationship thatâs borne from pity or charity.âÂ
âPity?â Lily echoes incredulously. âYou think Iâve confused love for pity? Is that how low you think of us? After all that weâve been through?â
âAre you stupid?â Sirius bites back.Â
âExcuse me?â you shriek. âMust I spell it out for you? Iâm trying to protect you! I am cursed!â
âNot anymore than I am!â Remus bellows with his fists tightly clenched, his canines laid bare and his cheeks lit ablaze. âIf youâre cursed, I must be damned. Why canât you allow yourself the same grace that youâve given us?âÂ
You wilt. âI canât do it, Remus. I just canât. If I die again, and everything resetsâdonât you know how much it will kill me if we start as strangers again?âÂ
Remus encases you in his warmth, an embrace that promises to keep you safe from all harm. (What good of a monster would he be if he canât rip apart your fears for you?) âThen we will find you in that life. And every life after that. Weâll use a pensieve, or anything at allâjust so we donât forget.â
You melt in his arms, bathing in his scent of caraway and bergamot. You feel Remus placing a kiss on the crown of your head. âAll these things I know. All these lives Iâve lived through. What if I ruin everything in this life?âÂ
âThen do it,â Lily provokes stubbornly.Â
âRuin me,â James pleads raspinglyâa falter in his steps as though heâd get on his knees and beg in an instant just for you to stay with them. âRuin me as much as youâd like. You would be the most beautiful devastation of my life.âÂ
And so, you choose them.Â
For there was never any other option from the start.
YOU WAKE UP in the dead of the night, sunken in a mattress that is one too small for five people to fit in, leafy vines and fairy lights wrapped around the posters of the bed. Sometime during the night, Lily had thieved the wool blanket for herself. You rest in between her and Sirius, their snores echoing into your ears as the grasshoppers chirp outside. The potted plants will swing from the ceiling as the evening breeze passes by. (Youâll scold James in the morning for leaving the windows open again.) By your feet, is a fat Tabby cat with one eye named Tuna. (Full name: Tuna Belly.) There are moving pictures on the flower-plastered wall, a testament to the life you shareâand the life you have fought hard for. Ruffled pillows are strewn across the carpeted floor. Parchments and notes lay askew on the desk table across the roomâRemusâs jittery preparation for his first day next week as Hogwartsâs newest professor.Â
Remus will catch you wide awake and tuck you into his chest, murmuring, âRest now. Weâve got an early morning tomorrow for Wormyâs wedding.âÂ
Youâll hum and relinquish your thoughts for the night, holding onto James hand over Remusâs belly. âI love you,â youâll whisper.Â
Remus will say it back without hesitationâand you know the others feel exactly the same.Â
Minutes later, the door will creak open and a tiny shadow will come crawling into the bed, knocking into everyoneâs knees and stomach. Itâs a little Harry whoâs three years old now. He curls under your neck and you will hold him with all the love that six lifetimes can offer and more.Â
When you close your eyes, it is a comforting darkness that envelopes you.
(Somewhere in a castle beyond valleys and lakes, locked away in the dusty shelves of Dumbledoreâs cupboards, sits a broken Time-Turner that finally stops ticking.)
a/n: i wrote the last 2k words like a woman posessed! LMAO. i have to be at training in 2 hours and i haven't prepared yet. tell me what you thought aaaaa!!!! and yes, your sixth life is your last life so u die happily and in peace mwah mwah. might continue this universe with drabbles, idk. if u spot any mistakes.. ignore it for a bit LMAO, i'll proofread this soon.
#sunny's hp fics#poly!marauders x reader#poly!marauders fluff#poly!marauders imagine#poly!marauders#poly!marauders x you#poly!marauders angst#hp fluff#hp imagine#james potter x reader#marauders imagine#marauders x reader#remus lupin x reader#lily evans x reader#hp angst#sirius black x reader#marauders x y/n#marauders fanfiction#x reader#x reader angst
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LIAR, LIAR!
PAIRING â kim mingyu x fem!reader
â AND THE DANCE FLOOR IS FILLING UP WITH BLOOD, BUT OH LORD, YOUâVE NEVER BEEN SO IN LOVE! â
WORD COUNT â 17k
SYNOPSIS â in a dramatic turn of events, a rich businessman is found dead in his lavish estate, and the authorities believe it was no accident. as the detectives dig deeper, they ultimately end up with two key suspects: you, the businessmanâs very own daughter, and your sworn enemy, kim mingyu. as the time progresses, tensions rise and secrets spill â and the truth has the power to either bring you closer together or tear you apart.
TAGS â murder mystery, rich rivals to partners in crime to lovers, whole lotta plot, explicit sexual content, somewhat graphic depictions of death, everyone and everything is dysfunctionalâą, mentions of suicide, unrealistic circumstances, moral compass is nowhere to be found, angst, medium long hair!gyu bc self-indulgence, tsundere-ish reader again guys sorry i love her so bad, mentions of parental neglect, this ended up so long help
âȘ verydeadly - wolves (kanye west cover),, low - dancing and blood,, vessel - red sex,, florence + the machine - mermaids,, zayn - bordersz,, mikky ekko - who are you, really?,, q - alone,, danna paola - tenemos que hablar,, blue foundation - eyes on fire (4 ave version),, summer camp - i want you
NOTE â one of my favorite episodes of going seventeen remains bad clue 2020, i loved mingyuâs role in it and i could totally see him portraying darker/morally grey characters and rock tf out of it so. i wrote this solely based on that idea. the music recs above are also really nice to get into the vibe! enjoyyyy :D
[ ONE ] â§Ë · .â â
[ JUMP TO PART TWO ]
i. ASK ME THE TRUTH AND IâLL TELL YOU A LIE
the interrogation room is unnecessarily bright, the noise of the water dispenser in the corner and the flickering led light above you running through your ears. the chair youâre seated on is uncomfortable, though itâs nothing compared to the tension you feel as the man in front of you treats you like youâre guilty of something.
âon september 2nd, around six oâclock, your father reportedly got unwell, so he left his office early, choosing to do the rest of his paperwork at home. according to the information we got from the gps tracker in his car, he went straight home, took no detours. he arrived at your family estate thirty minutes later. then at eight oâclock, the police receives a call from you, saying your father hung himself.â
you stare at the the inspector â whose name you did not bother remembering â before waving with your hand. âiâm aware. iâve heard the recap of events many times at this point. this isnât the first time iâm being interrogated, surprisingly enough.â
with a puzzled look, he raises his brow at you. âyou donât think you should be a suspect?â
âno, i donât.â
âat the time of the incident, you were home, as well as two members of the staff. since the staff were on their dinner break and you were apparently in your room, itâs hard to say what exactly happened, since there were no witnesses.â
âdo you mind me asking why you think itâs murder and not just a suicide?â
heâs intrigued by the way you discuss the topic so casually. âyour father was an important man. wouldnât you want to know who killed him if that were the case?â
âsure. iâd thank them.â you smile at him, the hatred for your father shining through. âbelieve me, inspector â my father was a miserable man who surrounded himself with miserable people. i wasnât there by choice.â
âdid he treat you badly, then?â he continues, trying to pry any information out of you.
all you can do is sigh. âi was his daughter in blood and name only. nothing more.â
with your demeanor softening into something sadder, the inspectorâs tone changes into something different. âaside from you, and the staff, of course, we do have another suspect who we think could have something to do with your fatherâs death.â
that sparks your interest. âwho?â
the inspector grabs his small pile of documents to pull a printed photo out of it, putting it before you. you visibly frown, because the person on the photo is someone youâre unfortunately awfully familiar with.
âkim mingyu is a suspect? seriously?â you ask, completely in shock. ironically, heâs the last person youâd suspect in a scenario like the one you currently find yourself in.
âwhat can you tell me about him?â
leaning back in your chair, you list a few things. âheâs a year younger than me. we went to the same high school, same university, have some of the same friends. though all of that is relatively common in our social circle.â
âanything else?â
keeping the insults to yourself for now, you press your lips together. âour parents are good friends. well, were, now that my fatherâs gone. mingyu and i hate eachother to the bone, though.â
âany particular reason why?â
âiâm not sure where it started⊠thereâs just something off about him. itâs always been there. heâsâbeyond arrogant. always showing off his looks, his wealth, his charm, his intelligence. everything. he insults me, i insult him. we simply donât get along, never have. nothing you havenât seen before, iâm sure.â
the inspector raises his brow. âi think you may have left something out.â
âsuch as?â
his hand moves into the blue folder sitting on the table, taking another photo out of it, holding it up before you. âyour father was often spotted with him. at events, business meetings â you name it. matter of fact, your father seemed to be accompanied by kim mingyu more than anyone else. which is interesting, considering you are his only child.â
your gaze turns sour, voice softer yet more hateful than before. âdonât tell me this is the reason iâm a suspect.â
âletâs just say it doesnât make you look good.â
âyou really believe i murdered my own father in cold blood because he cared more about kim mingyu than he ever did about me? thatâs pathetic and ridiculous.â
âyou wouldnât be the first. itâs a plausible story.â
scoffing at the accusation, you shake your head. âweâre done here. the moment you have an actual lead, iâll talk, but not like this. iâm still here grieving and youâre accusing me of being the culprit.â you get up in anger, taking your bag with you before slamming the door shut, not bothering to listen to what the man is trying to tell you to make you stay.
this whole shit-train started two weeks ago. your father was found dead in your childhood home, hung by a rope around his neck. instead of calling it a death by suicide, the police apparently have enough reason to suspect it was a homicide.
youâve been questioned several times in the past few weeks, but thereâs been a gradual shift in the behavior of the inspector and his handimen â theyâre treating you like a suspect now.
which you are, for whatever reason. they have yet to come up with any actual evidence.
your contact in the police force mentioned to you that youâre not just any suspect â youâre one of the two main suspects.
and that is unsettling, especially when you discovered who else is.
as you go down the hall, you suddenly lock eyes with kim mingyu himself, whoâs leaning against the wall with his hands in the pockets of his trousers. a few strands of hair hover by his cheeks, framing his strong features.
âwhat the fuck are you doing here?â you ask in a rather hostile manner, the scowl on your face deepening.
his lips part before he starts explaining. âthey wanted to talk to me. again.â
âhavenât you heard the rumors, gyu?â you mockingly use the nickname, taking a step closer to him, âtheyâre saying thereâs a possibility you killed him.â
your arch-nemesis looks back at you with a furrowed brow. âthatâs ridiculous.â
âis it? you were always with him⊠itâs perhaps the only thing that makes sense in all of this.â
he seems offended youâd even insinuate something like that. âitâs really the other way around, though. youâre the one who hated him. i had nothing against the man.â
itâs true that you and your father didnât exactly get along, especially the past few years, to put it lightly. you always considered him to be greedy, cold and unforgiving, and you certainly didnât cry the moment they told you he had passed away.
âno, we all know how much you liked him,â you hardly make an effort to hide your disdain, âbut they must not believe that, considering youâre just as much of a suspect as i am.â
he clenches his jaw. âiâm not guilty.â
âneither am i.â you state. like always, thereâs a tangible coldness to your voice, which he finds soothing, for whatever reason.
itâs quiet for a moment as youâre both unsure of what to say next, a rarity between you.
a few years ago, your father mentioned you and mingyu could make a good pair.
you proceeded to laugh in his face.
mingyu is a constant reminder of what you could be, and thatâs the last thing you need in your life.
âif i find out youâre somehow involved in thisââ
instead of immediately refuting the statement, he narrows his eyes at you. âthen what?â
you realize you need to be careful with your words here â you canât throw around threats to kill people as the top suspect in a murder investigation. âiâll make sure you pay for it. they might buy your little golden-boy act, but i sure as shit donât. i never have.â
a smirk subtly tugs at his lips as he leans more down, eyes flicking lower before they meet yours again. âiâd be careful with my words if i were you,â he firmly tells you, his lashes fluttering, âthereâs always someone watching.â
only now do you take notice of how close youâre standing to him, and you look behind you, seeing the inspector that just interrogated you observing you and mingyu from a distance.
so you push yourself away from him, giving him a last glare before walking away.
mingyu only moves from his spot once youâre gone from his field of view, greeting the inspector with a kind smile.
ii. THE HATRED WE BEAR
you find yourself staring at your fatherâs tombstone with a numb face and the wind breezing through your hair. your makeup is slightly smudged under your eyes from the tears you shed just an hour before, while you were giving the public a final speech regarding his passing.
the funeral was long â too long.
at a certain point, once the whole thing was done and everyone left, you decided to take a quiet moment for yourself in the graveyard to let everything sink in.
you made the mistake of thinking youâd left alone.
a voice youâre too familiar with speaks up behind you. âiâm sorry for your loss.â
of course itâs kim mingyu out of all people whoâs still here, sneaking up on you.
you donât have the energy to make a snarky comment this time. âiâd ask why youâre still here, but itâs a question i already know the answer to.â
he still offers you his answer. âiâm here to check up on you.â
well, that takes you by surprise. âwhy?â
âyou lost the one parent you had left. i donât want you to be alone.â
something about that sentence fuels a sudden anger in you. heâs got some fucking nerve, saying that to you. âmaybe you shouldâve considered that a couple years ago. you know, before you decided to become my dadâs little protege.â
even as a little girl, your bond with your father was a shitty one. your mother passed when you were young, so you barely have any memories left of her.
in an attempt to win his love and affection, you always did everything your father asked of you, yet your efforts were hardly acknowledged. you found him to be a harsh and cruel man, but surely with you being his daughter, his only child, he mustâve cared for you. or so you always told yourself.
something about your yearning for his approval and support changed for the worse when mingyuâs mother became a prominent business partner to your father, about nine years ago. it made him spend more time with the kim family, and you have no idea how or why it happened, but mingyu became like a son for him.
you saw how well your dad treated him, and you cried for a long, long time as you compared it to his neglect towards you. for every pat on mingyuâs back, you got scolded for not being good enough. whenever he got praised, you got discarded. itâs no miracle that you came to be the way that you are. detached, perceptive, appearing to be just as unfeeling as the man who raised you.
you hated your father. with all your heart.
but you grew to hate kim mingyu more.
so to hear him say that he doesnât want you to be alone â that takes the goddamn cake.
he lowers his head at your words. âit wasnât like that.â
âright. of course it wasnât.â your voice is painfully spiteful.
âi wouldnât have done it if i knew it was at your expense. iâm sorry.â
heâs trying to be nice to you, not understanding yet that itâs actually doing more damage, making you angrier. âthe last thing i want is your fucking pity.â
âthen what do you want?â
ânothing you can give me.â itâs a subtle final warning coming from you, because youâre actually about to explode at him. âjust leave me be.â
âplease, just... i wanna help you.â
like a ticking time bomb, you suddenly hit your limit. finally, you turn around, facing him, and itâs only then that he truly sees how upset you are, like a storm suddenly changing its direction, and heâs in the way.
âhelp me? youâd help me by getting the fuck out of my face. you wanna know what i want, mingyu? i want to know what in godâs name everyone loves so much about you, what it is that made my father shut me out completely and replace me with you. he gave you more love than he ever gave me. just looking at you makes me sick. what the fuck did he see in you that he didnât see in me?â you ask, unable to stop yourself from pouring your emotions out to the guy in front of you. âwhy did he hate me so much? even in death, he favors you over me. he left you... everything. a final âfuck youâ to his own child. and for what? for you?â
the fact that you got word from your fatherâs lawyer that your father chose to leave everything he had to mingyu instead of you was like the straw that broke the camelâs back.
throughout your life, you always did what was expected of you. you were the perfect daughter.
and for what?
the fact that your father grew to hate you and love this asshole so much that he left you not a single penny to your name â that is your tipping point.
and mingyu just wordlessly allows you to continue ranting, almost as if he deserves it.
âwhat the fuck is so special about you, huh? because i donât get it. sure, youâve got a nice face and youâre a smart guy, but i donât believe you actually give a shit about others. i bet you came here today to rub my dadâs inheritance in my face â you fucking pretentious douchebag.â
âiâm sorry. i never meantââ he stumbles, nearly falling over as he backs away while you keep stepping forward, feeling surprisingly small in front of you, in spite of his tall frame.
âi donât give a shit if this is what you intended to happen or not! iâm all alone.â you show your sadness right between the anger and hostility, vulnerable in front of him. âno family like everyone else, no money, no house, nothing. abandoned by the one person i had left.â
he looks at you as if youâve just slapped him across the face. heâs never even shown you a hint of vulnerability â nor have you for that matter â so why is he showing it now?
youâre too deep into your breakdown to think rationally about it. âyou took literally everything that i had. and iâll never forgive you for that.â
âplease, let meâlet me fix it.â he chokes out, as overwhelmed by your strong emotions as you are yourself.
the harshness of your words makes him feel like heâs crumbling in your presence. âtalk to me like you care about me one more goddamn time, and iâll make you regret ever meeting me in the first place.â
in all the years that youâve known him, you donât think youâve ever seen him flinch â you doubt any of your words have ever hurt him.
until this moment, it seems. but why is he even hurt? you donât care about him and he doesnât care about you. itâs always been that way, and you have a hard time believing itâll ever change.
the moment you walk away from him with a sharp pain in your chest, pushing him to the side by his shoulder, heâs left behind in a shocked and bewildered state, neither of you aware that a pair of curious eyes witnessed the whole exchange.
iii. ULTERIOR MOTIVES
âthe full inheritance of your father has been transferred over to you.â
the cup of tea you were raising stills with your hand. your eyes narrow at your lawyer as youâre seated in the garden of your fatherâs estate. âwhatâhow? why? it wasnât passed down to me.â
âno, but the person it was passed down to can always make the decision to pass it on. and he did â surprisingly with no strings attached,â he tells you, putting the document from the notary in front of you, âi had it all double-checked. everythingâs there, the documents signed by kim mingyu himself.â
just hearing the name makes you grimace, putting you off your tea. âand thereâs absolutely nothing he wants from me?â
ânothing was mentioned, no. he did, however, leave you a note.â
âwhat does it say?â
your lawyer raises his brow as he reads it, handing it to you instead of reading it out loud, which makes you give him a puzzled look before casting your eyes downwards to the piece of paper.
tomorrow, 4:30, my apartment. all you have to do is sign the papers. i look forward to the day youâll make me regret meeting you.
âthat asshole.â you mutter to yourself, not loud enough for your lawyer to hear it, but heâs certainly got an idea of how you feel about the whole situation.
âyou do, of course, always have the option to reject the inheritance, but i would highly recommend not to. frankly, in all of my years of experience in this field, iâve never felt a bigger need to encourage a client to take a deal.â
once youâve picked up the documents and skimmed over the words, you look back at him. âand if i did accept it, it wouldnât contain any possible implications for me in the long term?â
ânone. it is... fairly remarkable heâs willing to give you the full inheritance for nothing in return, even if he and his family are known for their wealth. but it wouldnât be a significant loss for him, considering the capital he already has to his name.â the man explains, not needing to spell it out for you.
you put down your cup. âknowing him, iâm not so sure he doesnât want anything. i suppose iâll have to talk to him about it myself, tomorrow.â
your lawyer highly encourages you to do so, leaving you to spend the rest of the day wondering what he could possibly want from you.
and so the following day, at 4:30 sharp, you step into his apartment â penthouse is the more fitting term. youâll admit, though, that heâs got style.
itâs dead silent in his place, save for the metronome in the background and the slow brew of his coffee machine. heâs wearing a white long-sleeved shirt with black trousers as he approaches you. âglad you could make it. coffee?â
âwhy are you willing to give me the inheritance?â you ask directly, not feeling up for the unnecessary chitchat. youâve always hated small talk. âif it was just a set-up, iâm leaving.â
he doesnât seem to be even the slightest bit surprised by your forwardness. âiâm willing to give it to you because a) i donât need it, and b) i donât want it. i think itâs ridiculous your dad set up his will like this.â
âwell, that makes two of us.â you fake a polite smile, clearly very sarcastically, putting your hand on your hip. âyou asked me to come sign the papers, but i have yet to see them.â
mingyu smiles a little at you. of course youâd skip straight to business â you never were a girl of many words. he walks over to a cupboard and takes a sealed folder with the documents out of a drawer, handing it to you.
when you attempt to take the folder from him, he swiftly retracts his hand like the asshole he is. âitâs not completely free, though.â
you pinch the bridge of your nose. âof course. i shouldâve known better than to believe you were willing to do something out of the kindness of your own heart.â
he just keeps going as if he didnât hear you, very much used to the little quips you throw at him by now. âdonât worry, i think you can manage this very small task for me.â
âjust tell me what you want alreadyââ
âmy familyâs hosting a gala next week, on friday. iâd like you to be my date.â
youâre baffled. this is what he wants in return for the inheritance worth millions of dollars? to have you on his arm for a single night?
oh, hell no. youâre not falling for it.
âwhy? you wanna publicly humiliate me or something?â you question, a deep frown settled in your forehead.
he huffs, annoyed that youâd think that low of him. âi know weâve always hated eachother, but, maybe, during a hard time⊠it would be nice to have one relaxed night. and yeah, i wouldnât mind doing that with a pretty girl to keep me company. what do you say? deal?â
not once in all the years youâve known him has he ever called you pretty.
âfine. but donât think about pulling any stunts.â
âwouldnât dare.â his smile sits somewhere beween teasing and serious when he finally hands you the papers.
you sit down and briefly scan the documents, not signing them right away to have them checked by your lawyer first. âif everything in this is according to the plan, youâll have them signed by tomorrow morning.â
âokay. see you friday.â he winks at you, escorting you to his front door, a subtle grin on his face that gives off the impression heâs planning something, and you can only imagine what it might be.
there is one good thing about having to spend time in his family home, though â and thatâs to search his rooms to find anything that might implicate him having something to do with your fatherâs murder.
since thereâs still a culprit to be named.
with your own agenda in mind, you walk out of his apartment, searching for the name of your stylist in your contacts.
youâre going to need a dress, after all.
iv. A PROPOSAL
with a stern look on your face, you look at the entrance of the gala from the tinted window of your car. itâs all bright lights and colorful decorations, candles, flowers â the kim family is well known for their luxurious and memorable parties. youâve attended plenty of them. while you and mingyu may not get along, his sister and mother are genuine sweethearts, some of the kindest and most welcoming people you know.
if only you could say the same for the asshole youâre about to spend the evening with.
after checking your makeup in the pocket-sized mirror for a final time, your driver opens your door so you can step out of the car, which leaves you on your own in front of the stairs.
mingyu originally mentioned he wanted to pick you up at your home like the gentleman he very much claims to be, but you very quickly shut the idea down and told him youâd just meet him at his familyâs mansion.
so here you are.
attending a gala only a month after your fatherâs funeral must seem like an⊠interesting choice, to say the least. the people you come across express their condolences and ask if youâre doing well â you wonder if the sentiment is real or not â and you tell them youâre here because it serves well as a distraction.
youâve become an excellent liar over the years.
as youâre standing at the top of the stairs, leaning on the railing, you observe the people on the dance floor below. those who arenât dancing are chattering, the noises of clinking glasses and laughter filling your ears.
most of the time, youâre able to somewhat enjoy this life. but the truth is that it can be as exhausting as it is glamorous.
but with your last living parent gone, you do feel a sense of freedom, even if it is lonely at times.
not like you didnât feel lonely when he was still alive.
you didnât love him or care for your father. you cared for the hope that someday he would change. that he would show you he did care for you, even a little bit.
but that day never came.
he was primarily an investor, so at least you havenât been burdened with having to take over a business or anything like it. having no siblings either, you feel like you should take this opportunity to start fresh; focus on building your own career and use your fatherâs money for things heâd never approve of.
suddenly, you spot your date in the midst of the crowd, breaking you out of your train of thoughts. his half-long hair looks pretty on him, you have to admit, the few strands in front of his face paired with the tailored, navy suit giving him the appearance of a model.
heâs currently talking to an older woman who clearly seems to adore him, the smile he puts up making her give him a gentle, loving squeeze on his upper arms. like always, no one is able to read the bitterness you feel as your face remains neutral.
growing up in your restricted social circle of the countryâs wealthiest families, your group of peers wasnât extremely big. you all went to the same primary school, same private high school. mingyu was always one of if not the most popular kid at school. an effortless ace at every fucking thing. everyone loved him, be it your peers or their parents.
you wouldnât say you werenât popular. quite the opposite, actually. your best friend was the queen bee of the school, as she was always striving to be the best in everything. top of the class, highest achievements, a true perfectionist at heart. bold, definitely a bit judgemental and classist too, but once sheâs your friend, sheâs the sweetest girl in the world. she did like to dabble in some drama with others if it came onto her path.
and you were the opposite. you preferred to steer clear of any drama, much preferring to watch it unfold from the sidelines â as you usually just didnât care enough to interfere with it â and you were never quite as talkative as your best friend.
the sentences leaving your mouth are always quick, direct, sharp and without stutter. youâre masterful at small talk, even though you hate it. you know how to play people like a fiddle. your father made you use your manipulation skills to good use rather frequently.
many consider you cold and calculated.
which is true, of course. but you still have a heart, even if it barely beats.
the outburst you gave mingyu after your fatherâs funeral mustâve come as a shock to him. no one has ever seen you in such a vulnerable and weak state, and out of all the people who couldâve seen it, it naturally had to be him â and that makes you uncomfortable.
once heâs finished his conversation, he looks in front of him, then up at the balcony â and he locks eyes with you.
you give him a look of acknowledgment, but thatâs it. he doesnât seem to mind, though, still shining as brightly as ever, making his way up the stairs as fast as he can. âiâm sorry i wasnât at the entrance to greet you, i didnât think youâd be here so soon.â
âitâs fine.â
he glances up and down, admiring the dress you chose. âyou look gorgeous.â
the deeply dark green dress with its boat neckline, long and fitted sleeves and intricate gold embroidery makes you look elegant. with the dress itself already being quite the statement piece, you chose to pair it with dainty earrings, your hair half-up and curled.
âthank you.â you donât bother saying anything about his appearance. he must be used to it at this point.
âcan i get you something to drink?â
you test the waters by throwing in a joke. âwhat, planning on poisoning me?â
his eyes flicker for a moment, stricken by something you canât quite place, which makes you blink at him. his flirtatious and charming self returns within a mere second, and he proceeds to snicker at your joke. âi could, but whereâd be the fun in that?â
rolling your eyes at him, you take his arm once heâs offered it, keeping in mind youâre doing this for the inheritance.
the time goes by quicker than expected. he introduces you to some of the people heâs close with, tells you stories youâve never heard before, even asks you about yours.
a few of his friends come by as well, surprised to see you by mingyuâs side. most people your age here know that you and him have never quite gotten along, to put it lightly.
when they subtly ask about it, mingyu tells them he insisted you came to distract yourself from the death of your father, and that you could probably use a party.
it raises more question marks as to what his motive is for asking you to be here tonight. what is he gaining from this? he hasnât humiliated you yet. if anything, heâs only spoken of you highly, save for the little snark he keeps between the two of you.
itâs strange. really strange.
after a while, once all the guests have been drinking a bit, you decide to set your own plan in motion. this might be your only chance to snoop around here, as you doubt youâll find yourself in here again anytime soon.
youâre literally invited in his home â youâd be a fool not to check his room.
unfortunately, just as you try to disappear from the crowd, mingyu extends his hand to you. âdance with me?â
just as youâre about to refuse him, you remember that this is the one night you have to be nice to him, all so he can give you the inheritance that was meant to be yours in the first place.
with a small sigh, you slide your hand in his, at which he grins triumphantly.
before you know it, youâre in the middle of the room together, and he has his one hand on your lower back, the other hand intertwined with yours. heâs smooth with his moves, you have to admit.
the question has already left your mouth when you process it. âwhy am i here? iâm sure thereâs a reason i needed to be your date tonight.â
mingyu cocks his head at you. âi think youâve had to endure a lot the past couple weeks. the incident, the interrogations, the press, the shit with the inheritance â iâm impressed you havenât lost your mind yet.â
âhow do you know i havenât?â you ask, and he twirls you around, his hands feeling like theyâre burning on your skin. âwasnât my breakdown after the funeral enough to prove you otherwise?â
âwell, looking back, i shouldâve probably left you alone in that moment. but i did think about what you said, and you can correct me if iâm wrong, but i feel like your father and our ties to him were what made us hate eachother so much. now that heâs gone, maybe we can⊠i donât know. tolerate one another.â
you make sure to hide your confusion from him. does he really not see it? sure, the main reason youâve always despised mingyu was because of his relationship with your father, but you werenât exactly best friends before that either.
even putting it like that would still make it the understatement of the year.
if he actually pictures the two of you becoming friends, though, heâs lost it.
unsure of what to tell him, you give him a shitty excuse to escape the conversation. âiâm just gonna use the ladiesâ room, if you donât mind.â you let mingyu know, and he nods at you in acknowledgement, caught off guard by you leaving so suddenly.
so you walk off, the voices of the people and the music in the hall fading into the background as you trail off.
now that youâre alone, you can finally go check his room.
itâs harder to navigate the mansion than you thought. hallways that all look similar, god knows how many rooms â you hope you wonât get lost here.
one of your best friends is good friends with mingyuâs sister, and so she knows the place like the back of her hand. when you asked her for the layout of the place, she did think it strange, but you told her she had nothing to worry about.
mingyuâs bedroom and study are supposedly on the third floor of the east wing, and the party takes place in the west wing.
so thatâs just fucking great.
your best friend did warn you that he most often keeps his doors locked whenever visitors are present, so to ensure you could get in, you snatched the key from his pocket when he was dancing with you earlier.
it almost makes you chuckle when you think about how easy it was.
when youâve finally arrived at what seems to be the door to mingyuâs room, you double-check the environment around you to see whether anyoneâs following you, and when it appears to be safe, you shove the key into the lock, twisting it.
you exhale when realizing itâs the right key.
entering the room, you quickly shut it behind you, taking in the sight.
itâs raining outside, which you take notice of through the large windows. several paintings adorn the walls â you didnât know he was a lover of art â as well as some photos of him with his family.
the room is surprisingly tidy, his clothes all neatly folded on the wooden planks in his closet and the drawers underneath. the few books he has sitting on top of the cupboard are gathering dust â you suppose he doesnât like to read all that much.
of course he doesnât.
his king-sized bed seems soft and comfortable, and the room smells of the cologne and perfume he always wears.
you blink a few times, realizing youâre dwelling too much on details that are not a priority right now.
which is enough to snap you awake, a rush of adrenaline moving through your veins as you look for anything interesting. files, documents, notebooks â anything.
you find his agenda in a drawer of his desk. with slightly trembling fingers, you move the pages back to the date of your fatherâs death, as well as the days before that.
as youâre caught up with doing so, you momentarily forget the first rule of breaking into a forbidden space: never turn your back to a door when you should be watching it.
âyou know, iâm starting to think you agreeing to be my date came with ulterior motives on your side.â you suddenly hear mingyuâs voice behind you, at which you turn around, looking a bit too guilty for comfort.
your voice almost gets caught up in your throat, but you keep your composure. âif it makes you feel any better, i didnât plan this.â
âitâs alright.â he responds, closing the door behind him smoothly, as if he doesnât want you to see it. âyou still think i had something to do with your fatherâs death, donât you?â
âiâm not sure. i donât see why you would, now that youâve given me the inheritance. what other motive could you have?â
all mingyu does is clench his jaw at the rhetorical question. then he snaps out of it, his eyes trailing to the desk youâre currently leaning on. he takes a few steps closer to you, and you raise a brow, waiting in anticipation what heâll do.
his face is suddenly very close to yours, and youâre almost convinced heâs leaning in to touch you when he reaches for the drawer behind you instead. âwell, as a matter of fact, i did have something to show you.â
that surprises you.
âyour father always carried a little red notebook with him. itâs the only part of the inheritance i didnât give you, solely because i wanted to show you myself. thereâs a few strange scribblings in it, with locations and numbers, and look at thisââ he opens it up in front of you, pointing at the paper with his index finger, âapparently he felt like he was being followed just days before he died. maybe the police is right and he did get murdered.â
âyeah, i already figured he probably pissed off the wrong guy.â when he looks at you hopefully, you shrug. âwhat?â
âwe should check it out, right? find out who killed him.â
you immediately shake your head at his suggestion. âno.â
mingyuâs whole body language changes, genuine confusion overtaking his features. âwhat do you mean, no?â
âhe was caught up in all kinds of shit, things i never wanted to be a part of. thatâs no different now that heâs six feet under.â
âare you not the slightest bit curious who killed him?â
âfrankly, no, iâm not. iâd say whoever is guilty did me a favor.â
despite your valid point, he persists. âokay, then how about this â what if this person would come after you for whatever reason? donât you want to know who youâre dealing with?â
you narrow your eyes at him. âwhy do you care so much, mingyu? iâm sure this is something you could manage on your own.â
the sudden question surprises him, so he shrugs. âmaybe iâm not sure why. but i do. and you know i did care for him.â
âwhy donât you just let the police handle it?â
âbecause they donât know this world â and we have access to places, people they wouldnât even know where to find or how to deal with. have you talked to the detectives? theyâre amateurs.â he answers, pausing before taking a step closer to you. âheâs dead either way, doing a small bit of research might be interesting. who knows what you might find.â
âand you wanna do this with me of all people because...?â
he rolls his eyes at the question. âyou were the only other person directly affected by it. câmon, am i really so bad that you canât even deal with me for a little while?â
the fact that you just give him a deadpan stare tells him all he needs to know.
it makes you bite your lip. you donât feel like doing this at all, certainly not with mingyu of all people, but he appears to be ready to do this with or without you.
besides, you do feel up for a little adventure.
âfine, iâll bite. hypothetically, what if i were interested in finding out who killed him?â
the young man in front of you tilts his head. âthen iâd suggest we work together and do some digging.â
pursing your lips, you watch his pleased expression when he notices youâre actually considering it. âwhy do i feel like iâm gonna regret this?â
âmaybe you will. maybe you wonât. we can go right back to hating eachother after this, but for now, weâll be partners. deal?â
your eyes linger on the hand heâs stretched out to you, and even as youâre hesitant to take it, he doesnât take his eyes off you.
with a sigh, you shake his hand. âokay. deal.â
v. PARTNERS IN CRIME
âfor someone so organized, he sure as hell has a lot of unnecessary shit lying around here.â mingyu mutters, searching through the drawers of the cupboard.
you scoff in agreement. âtell me about it.â
the two of you are rummaging through your fatherâs study in your home in an attempt to find anything interesting as to what he mightâve been up to the past few years.
so far, youâve had zero luck with it.
you already figured thereâd probably be nothing of interest here, but mingyu insisted, said it would be stupid not to. so here you are.
âyou know, iâm pretty sure my dad wouldnât be as stupid as to just leave traces of his criminal affiliations lying around in his study.â
mingyu shrugs while simultaneously looking into a drawer. âyou never know.â
âhe was an asshole, but he was a smart one.â you mumble to yourself as you go through the little notebook mingyu just handed you a few minutes ago.
he watches you with curiosity. âcan i ask you something?â
without looking up at him, you give him a rather direct response. âiâm sure youâll ask me regardless of my answer to that question.â
ever so indifferent, he thinks. if anything, one thing about you he is actually fond of is your unfiltered attitude. more people should be like that. âyou said youâd never forgive me for what i did to you."
hearing those words makes you look up at him. youâre surprised heâs taking an approach this straightforward with you. âi know what i said.â
âis there nothing i can do to at least make things more civil between us?â
god, youâre sick of him already.
instead of outright telling him you hate him more than anyone else you know, you cross your arms over your chest and fire a question right back at him. âwhy do you want things to be different between us? donât tell me youâre losing sleep over it, now.â
mingyu pauses a moment before he answers you. âi thought about the things you said, when you were upset with me, and i realized iâve made your life harder without having intended to do so. and yeah, i am losing sleep over it.â
while he does appear earnest, you donât exactly trust him, so all you do is shrug your shoulders.
he wants to say something right when his phone rings. once he picks up, you figure it must be something business-related, judging by the tone of his voice and formal language.
an apology directed at you leaves his mouth as soon as heâs hit the red button on his screen. âiâm sorry. an important business meeting was moved and i promised my mom iâd be there.â
youâve met mingyuâs mother a few times, at events. sheâs the ceo of a very prominent hotel business. many of the highest ranked hotels around the world are under her care, and she clearly knows what sheâs doing, since her business has been thriving for many years at this point. you remember it was her who took over as ceo after mingyuâs father passed in a car accident when he was younger.
âthen you better get going.â you tell him, your face not pulling a single muscle. you hope he didnât think you were going to ask him to stay.
he nods at your words, taking the jacket with his initials embroidered in the tag and slinging it over his arm. âyeah. iâll call you.â he says, going out the doorway, yet your voice makes him halt in his tracks.
âmingyu.â you say his name to him, an unfamiliar feeling on your tongue, and he turns to look back at you.
he awaits your words, catching the subtle warning in your eyes as you refer back to the question of his you had yet to answer.
âwe may be working together now â call us associates, or even partners in crime â but once this is over, weâll go right back to strangers. letâs just keep this⊠somewhat professional.â
you find he can be surprisingly hard to read from time to time, for a guy who wears his heart on his sleeve. after blankly staring at you for a few seconds, processing the words, he just offers you a little smile and a gentle response. âokay.â
and he walks off, only leaving you more intrigued than before.
for two days, itâs complete radio silence from mingyu. all he asked you over text was if youâd been able to find anything in the study, to which you replied with a simple no. he didnât say anything else.
you sincerely thought this whole investigation of yours wasnât actually gonna lead to anything, that it was useless â until now.
itâs eleven oâclock, dark outside, the metronome ticking in the background of your living room as your eyes are glued to the screen of your laptop.
you just got a notification from the bank that someone made a significant withdrawal from one of your fatherâs bank accounts, one that still needs to be signed over to your name.
question is, who the fuck has access to your fatherâs bank account besides you?
no one. supposedly.
staring at mingyuâs contact in your phone, you twist your lips, unsure of whether to call him about this or not.
going against your gut, you press on his phone number and wait for him to answer the call.
nothing.
for good measure, you call him a second time. same result.
then it hits you. you spoke to wonwoo last night â he mentioned something about him and mingyu going out together this evening.
wonwoo, thankfully, does pick up his phone. âhey. whatâs up?â
âhey. are you with mingyu right now?â
âyeah, why?â
âwhere are you?â
âuhââ he stutters out an address in the middle of the city, clearly confused by the urgency in your voice. âwhatâs going on? what do you need mingyu for?â
âwell, itâs hard to explain. anyway, iâm coming over.â
âheâs kind ofââ
you quickly interrupt him by hanging up. taking your wallet and car keys, you head out. the address wonwooâs given you is located in the club scene downtown, and you make it there in no-time with the navigation on your phone.
parking your car across the block, you get out and check your phone, heading to wherever wonwoo and mingyu currently are. you usually tend to go for the clubs at the other side of the city, as the vibe feels a little different here, but youâve been around the neighborhood a couple times, so itâs not entirely unfamiliar to you.
when you arrive at the club, you catch the sight of your friend leaning against the stone wall outside.
jeon wonwoo, all handsome in his expensive jacket and sleek shoes, looks surprised when he notices you of all people coming up to him, even though you told him you were coming. his voice is soft when he greets you. âhey. you gonna tell me what exactly youâre doing here?â
shrugging your shoulders, you put your hands in the pockets of your black coat. âyou said you were here with mingyu. i gotta talk to him.â
âright now?â
taking note of his baffled reaction, you tilt your head to the side. âyes, right now. i donât care if heâs occupied.â
wonwoo brings a cigarette to his lips, pushing the pair of dark-rimmed glasses higher up his nose. âwhatâs going on with you and him, anyway? i thought you hated each other.â
âwe still do.â
âwell, somethingâs changed.â
âbelieve me, wonwoo, i donât like him any more than he likes me.â
all he does is narrow his dark eyes at you.
just when you want to open the backdoor to the club, wonwoo stops you. âyou do know what kind of establishment this place is, right?â
frowning at him, you open the door just the slightest bit to check whatever heâs getting at, and once you catch sight of the pink and red lights, sensual music and metal poles attached to the ceiling, you momentarily close the door again.
right. this must be one of those clubs that are hidden from the prying eyes of non-customers, to give the illusion thereâs nothing going on behind these walls, giving the rich clients some privacy in their activities.
you roll your eyes. âwhen you said you were going to the club, i didnât think you meant a strip club.â
âi was about to tell you when you hung up on me.â
âso why are you out here and not in there with him?â
âbecause i wanted to smoke and he felt like heading into a more secluded space. with company, no doubt.â
oh, this is gonna be fun. since kim mingyu pretty much ruined your life, the very least you can do in return is ruin his night. you briefly chuckle to yourself. âalright. well, have fun smoking.â
âyouâre still going in?â he calls after you, and all you can do is scoff.
âyou think i care whether kim mingyuâs gonna have a good time or not?â
âforget i asked.â he responds, the hint of a smile tugging at his facial features. âiâll wait here âtil you get back.â
you shoot him a knowing smirk before stepping into the club. remaining in the background, you scan the area to see if thereâs a glimpse of him somewhere.
at the other side of the bar, a man seems to be on watch in front of a separate hallway, so you figure thatâs where the jackpot is.
not bothering to look back at the bartender, whose gaze trails after you, you head over to where you need to be, which is where youâre stopped in your path, as expected.
âthese are occupied private rooms, maâam.â a bouncer tells you.
âlook, sir, iâŠâ you begin, coming up with some bullshit excuse to get past him, âiâm pretty sure i saw my boyfriend just go in here with a dancer. all i want is a confirmation, iâm not looking to start drama.â
before the man can respond, you wordlessly hold up a small stack of hundred dollar bills between your index and middle finger, waiting for him to take the bribe.
works like a charm wherever you go.
his demeanor changes once he sees the money. âwhatâs he look like?â
âtall, dark medium-long hair, brown eyes, pretty handsome â though thatâs probably subjective.â you shrug, adding a little fake smile to it. you can get far in life with a little charm and money.
the few generic features seem to be enough for the bouncer to know who youâre talking about. he takes the money from your hand, pointing his finger at one of the more secluded rooms in the back.
âgo for room number six.â he says, stepping to the side so you can pass him.
thanking him, you head into the back, the heels of your ankle boots clicking against the floor.
the rooms have their matching numbers on neon signs above them. your eyes curiously take in everything they see, but all rooms grant the people in them privacy with the use of frosted glass.
once youâve made it to the room with the number six on the sign, you take a breath while your hand rests on the handle.
you enter the room soundlessly. the broad space is dimly lit with its soft lights, a mixture of yellow, pink and red almost convincing you that this place is a mere fever dream.
mingyu is seated on the velvet red couch, his legs spread with a girl in skimpy lingerie dancing between them.
yet his eyes are on you.
with his head tilted down, he looks up at you from beneath his lowered brows, peering right past the bare hips of the girl as if sheâs not dancing in front of him at all.
you catch a hint of intrigue in his features. he reaches inside his pocket to hand a small stack of money to the dancer in the exact same way you did with the bouncer only a minute before, and the girl leaves you to your privacy.
âhello to you, too.â he says, not bothering to move a single muscle as he remains on the soft couch.
ânext time, answer your damn phone.â you scold him, staring him down with the coldest glare you can muster, and mingyuâs not sure why, but he relishes in it. it doesnât happen often that someone treats him like this.
âi was occupied.â he casually answers, his hand running through his dark locks.
âwell, not anymore.â you grin, handing him your phone to show the photo of the bank transcripts. âapparently, my dead father just took fifty grand out of his account.â
mingyu furrows his brows at the screen. âwhere?â
âall the way at the other side of the city. question is, who else has access to his account, aside from me?â
âwe should go and check the footage.â he says, shrugging his shoulders, and he finally gets up, towering over you again. âi know someone whoâs with the municipal authorities, iâll make the call.â
âright now?â you ask, referring to how deep into the night it is, at which he raises his brow.
âyes, right now. this is the best clue weâve come across so far. donât you agree?â
âi do. i just thought you cared more about, yâknow, being occupied.â you emphasise the last words with a waving hand, gesturing to the girl that was previously dancing on him, and his flirtatious nature comes right back to him as if it never left.
âwhy? wanna give me a show before we leave?â he smirks, getting closer, hoping to get some kind of reaction out of you, to see whatâs lurking underneath your closed-off persona.
fine. both of you can play this game, you think to yourself. âwhat, are the girls here not enough to get you off?â
âis that a yes?â
âwhy would you want a lap dance from a girl you canât stand? i may not like you, mingyu, but i didnât think youâd stoop so low to go after any woman with a pulse.â
âi feel flattered,â he smiles, eyes trailing down to your exposed collarbones, finding it ridiculously hot in here, âand i donât particularly like you, either, but we both know youâre gorgeous. besides, iâve seen you dance at chanâs club. you looked good.â
his honesty almost stuns you in your place. you didnât think he held that kind of physical attraction towards you, yet it makes you feel good â because you think heâs fucking hot, too.
such a shame that heâs an asshole.
but still, thereâs no time to dwell on his words. you have a reputation to uphold and a murder to solve, after all.
so you lean in, whispering your decision. âin your dreams.â
jesus, mingyu thinks, do you even remotely know how much sex appeal you have? it makes him beyond impulsive. âdid you know studies have shown that sleeping with someone you canât stand is arguably the best thing ever?â
you sarcastically reply to him with the exact same tone. âdid you know youâd be so much more bearable if you just kept your mouth shut?â
âwhat? itâs part of my charm.â is all he says in return, snickering a little over your response, and you merely roll your eyes.
âweâve got a different idea of charm, then.â
âokay, fair enough.â he shrugs, still maintaining the minimal distance between your bodies. âso what do you find charming? iâm dying to know, really.â
âi like men who donât feel the need to pay for a womanâs touch.â the reply comes fast and sharp as a blade. âi hope you pay them generously, since they have to put up with you out of all people.â
âshe didnât touch me, though. itâs a strip club, not a brothel.â
âhow noble of you.â you humorlessly chuckle at him, attitude turning more playful.
âmhm.â mingyu nods his head, the rest of his words sounding lower and suave. âtell me more. câmon, iâm curious. i gotta know my partnerâs preferences, right?â
the look you give your current partner is something. you decide to indulge him this once, face inching closer to his, just to keep things interesting. âi want someone who wonât hold me back. someone who will accept me for who i am â uninhibited.â
thereâs something you canât quite place flashing behind his eyes. itâs close to intrigue, but more intense, and you donât think youâve ever seen it in anyone elseâs eyes before.
âgood to know.â he breathes out, as if your words stole his breath, and you come to the realization that maybe, thereâs more to kim mingyu than you thought.
now that he seems to be pretty much speechless, you raise your shoulders. âso, are we heading out or should i tell the dancer to come back in?â
he stutters out a reply, and you find it funny how his attitude is constantly going back and forth between a flustered mess and the most confident guy in the room.
once youâve returned to the backdoor where you got in, you see wonwoo is still outside, his cigarette put out on the ashtray beside him.
âyou leaving?â wonwoo asks, waiting for either of you to answer.
âyeah. duty calls.â mingyu replies while putting his jacket on.
for what itâs worth, wonwoo is actually a dear friend of yours, and one of the few people you show physical affection to, so you give him a kiss on the cheek before walking off. âcatch you later, okay?â
he nods, catching mingyu curiously watching the exchange, and when you walk off with him, wonwoo notices him put his hand on your lower back, which you proceed to swat away.
a mere twenty minutes later, you and mingyu are seated in your car in an empty parking lot, looking at a screen displaying street security footage of the bank where the withdrawal was made earlier tonight.
mingyuâs friend seungkwan, who works for the authorities, sent you the footage, and as youâre looking it over, heâs on the phone explaining his observations. âhe was wearing a mask and a cap, so we couldnât recognize him. the car he drove has a license plate that doesnât match, so likely stolen. he drove from a nearby parking garage to the bank, withdrew the cash, got back in the car and then parked it right here, about six blocks further, in the business district.â
the building the car is parked across is one youâd recognize any time of day. itâs where your fatherâs main office is â or was â one of the places he never allowed you to get into, or anyone for that matter. it was the only place where he got the peace and quiet he wanted.
you turn your head to glance at mingyu, giving him a knowing look. âthatâs where my fatherâs main office is.â
âyou think the guyâs gonna try to break in?â
âif he got his hands on the passcodes and proceeds to wait before the building he always worked in, then yeah, i do.â
you nod in agreement, because he makes a fair point. mingyu looks at the worried expression on your face and decides youâve gathered enough information now.
he thanks seungkwan and tells him bye before hanging up, then turning his focus to you. âwhoever that guy is, if heâs planning on breaking in, we gotta beat him to it.â
âyou wanna break into an office on the seventh floor located in a building that neither of us are allowed into? they wonât even let us pass the front desk. i know because iâve tried.â
he shakes his head. âtrust me â weâll find a way in. iâve got an idea, but itâs not gonna be easy.â
vi. WEâRE NOT SO DIFFERENT, YOU AND I
the following days are spent analyzing and memorizing blueprints, tracking the people entering and exiting the building and checking security in the hope of finding some kind of loophole in the system.
trying to get in through the front door is too risky, so youâve opted for the roof instead, because thereâs several buildings so closeby that you can get into either of the buildings next to it and reach it from there. youâll get in with a classic heist movie tactic you pray works in real life as well.
ventilation shafts.
so now, youâre both in dark and practical clothing to attempt breaking in. because your plan is mediocre at best.
as you watch from the rooftop of a currently unoccupied office building nearby with a binocular, you face-palm yourself the moment you notice the security set-up is different than anticipated with the blueprints, meaning the ventilation shafts are most likely not accessible. âwell, fuck.â
âwhatâs wrong?â
you hand the binocular to mingyu, and he mimics your previous actions, huffing in annoyance when he sees it too. âshit. what do we do now?â
ânothing.â
âwhat?â
âour plan was already risky enough, but now that we pretty much donât even have a way in, weâd be stupid to try. we only have a fifteen-minute window before a security guard comes up the roof again.â
âthatâs plenty.â
âit would be, for like â a swat team. weâre amateurs. at this, anyway.â
âspeak for yourself.â
âoh, iâm sorry, have you done anything remotely on this scale before?â
âwell⊠no.â
pinching the bridge of your nose, you roll your eyes to yourself. âwe shouldâve brought wonwoo.â
mingyu is quick to respond with a sarcastic comment. âand tell him what, exactly? âhey, we need your help breaking into one of the best-guarded buildings in the city so we can snoop around and try to find a clue leading to a killerâ?â
âwell, i donât know if youâve noticed, gyu, but we quite literally have no other options.â
âwe could always try the front door. youâre still his daughter, they might let you in.â
âi really hope that wasnât an actual suggestion, because if it was, it would highly diminish the idea i have of your intelligence.â
âis this your way of telling me you think iâm smart?â
âwell, currently, i think youâre being an idiot, so no.â you retort, stealing the binocular out of his hand again. âgod, iâm starting to respect criminals. this shit is difficult to navigate around.â
mingyu chuckles as he adjusts the black baseball cap on his head. âthere has to be another way. maybe we couldââ
ââget in through an open window.â you interrupt, handing the device over to him. âyou see the glass window in the roof of his office? it looks like itâs ajar.â
once he sees it too, he tilts his head. âitâs almost too easy. itâd have to open manually, otherwise weâre screwed.â
you can only shrug. âitâs only a modern interior on the inside, the building itself is older, so the odds might be on our side. besides, itâs worth a shot, right?â
âcanât argue with that.â he agrees, checking the other buildings around to figure out the best approach.
you watch him as heâs distracted. heâs fully going for the whole partners-in-crime thing youâve got going on with him, yet a part of you is still unsure what his motives might be.
but for now, youâll just focus on the task at hand.
every fifteen minutes, a security guard comes up to the roof, checks everything, stays for a minute or two and leaves again. youâve been keeping track of it. as soon as the one currently on duty closes the door to the staircase behind him, heading back down, you both start a silent timer on your watches, getting to work.
one thing you discover doing said task is that jumping from roof to roof is really not as easy as they make it seem in the movies. if anything, itâs pretty scary, even if they are relatively close to eachother.
the jump from the last building to the one you need to be on top of has the biggest gap, and mingyu takes a solid leap, landing ever so gracefully.
you shuffle your feet for a moment, making the mistake of looking down. mingyu notices your hesitation and tries to encourage you the best he can. âit looks scary, but itâs a relatively easy jump. i swear. thatâs gotta mean something coming from a person with a fear of heights.â
clenching your fists, you try to steady your breathing. âdonât you lie to me, kim.â
thereâs something strangely charming about you using his last name whenever youâre scolding him. âcâmon. iâve always thought you were fearless. youâre not gonna diminish the idea i have of you, right?â
curse him for using your words against you like that.
clenching your fists, you bite your lip, the worst case scenario going through your head over and over.
âjust go back a couple steps. steady your breathing, and then you run. okay?â
you donât respond to his words but do as he says anyways. the jump isnât even that far, youâre just afraid of tripping.
but you wonât go out embarrassing yourself in front of kim mingyu. your pride is too strong for that.
so you take a deep breath and make a run for it, jumping over the gap and landing on top of the other roof, far away from the edge. mingyu laughs triumphantly. âgood job.â
âthanks.â you smile as he helps you up to your feet, and you dust off your jacket, proud of yourself for going through with it.
the two of you walk over to the glass window, and you kneel down, inspecting the lock. thank fuck â itâs so simple that all you have to do is click it open. youâre guessing they probably thought the security walking around was enough.
with your hands covered in gloves, you wiggle them through the gap and crack it open, after which mingyu takes the lead. he lets himself drop into the office silently, looking up at you as a gesture for you to follow him.
you attempt to do the same as him, but you figure he must have strong arm muscles, because youâre barely able to hold yourself up the way he can. he notices your struggle and moves to stand underneath you.
âjust let go. iâll catch you.â
âare you sure?â
he nods, his arms up as if heâs waiting for you to jump right into them. âyeah, yeah. i got you.â
not entirely convinced, you try to drop onto the floor in a way you can still hold yourself up, but mingyu proves himself true to his word when he catches you as easily as drawing his next breath. he looks you in the eye while he has you in his arms, his senses feeling heightened as your clothed skin touches with his.
then you tap on his shoulder, and he lets go of you.
the office is bigger than anticipated. the moonlight from outside is bright enough for you to not need a flashlight, so thatâs beneficial.
mingyu is awfully quick on his feet for someone as tall and bulky as him. heâs quiet in every step he takes, which is useful in a situation like this.
while he begins to look through a bunch of drawers, you open cabinet after cabinet, going through some documents that donât really contain anything interesting.
you turn to look at the desk and the painting on the wall behind it. itâs nothing spectacular â your father never had much of an appreciation for art, so you find it strange heâd even have it up here.
out of sheer curiosity, you try to check if thereâs a secret stash behind the painting like in those crime movies.
you have to refrain from laughing when your eyes fall onto the safe in the wall. âhey. gyu.â
he turns around, his entire demeanor changing when he sees what youâve found. âyouâre kidding.â
the safe has a surprisingly easy system. it has four dials, so you need a code with four numbers to get access to whateverâs inside. you change the dials to your birth year for fun, but naturally, it doesnât work. hell, mingyuâs birth year might have a better shot.
while you try out every combination you can think of, mingyu gets the little notebook out of his pocket â the one that was part of your fatherâs inheritance. he flips to one of the last pages. âtry 9-3-6-8.â
going with his suggestion, you rotate the dials until they have the right numbers, and you hear a click. blinking a few times, you turn the small crank wheel beside the dials and open the safe.
thereâs not much inside in terms of quantity, but the things that are in there are no joke.
two gold ingots, a stack of files and a loaded handgun with a silencer attached to it.
âwhat the fuck was he up to?â mingyu asks rhetorically, inspecting the pistol with care, and you shrug, grabbing the files to put them into the bag you took with you.
âi donât know, but we should hurry up. we can look at whatever all this is later. clockâs ticking.â
he figures you make a good point, so you hold out your bag, and he puts all of the safeâs contents into it.
youâre both scared to death when you suddenly hear voices coming from the other side of the door. you immediately zip up your bag and close the safe back up, putting the painting right back in front of it.
footsteps come approaching your direction, and you realize you donât have enough time to get back out of the office without being caught red-handed, so youâll have to find a place to hide.
just as youâre about to go sit underneath the desk, mingyu doesnât hesitate to grab you by your hand and pull you against his body, both of you hiding in the small gap between the bookcase and the wall, which is right next to the door.
you almost jump in your place when the door is opened by a security guard, and mingyu puts his hand over your mouth to make sure the guard doesnât hear you.
thankfully, youâre hidden right behind the door now that itâs opened, but your heart is fucking pounding as your chest is pressed against mingyuâs, and all you can focus on is him.
heâs suffocatingly close to you.
the situation forces you to look at him so closely â like never before. your attention trails down from his dark eyes to the litte mole on the bottom of his nose, the shape of his lips, and the glimpse you catch of the silver chain adorning his collarbones.
itâs the first time you see how big of a man he is. heâs been working out a lot in the past few years, with considerable results â standing this close to him highlights the contrast between his frame and yours.
the footsteps leave the office not long after, and the door closes. youâre finally able to breathe properly when he releases his palm from your mouth, and you inhale and exhale deeply.
âyou alright?â
âyeah. that was just â scary.â you respond, cracking a little smile.
he nods, neither of you really moving in your places yet. âyou can let go of me, yâknow.â mingyu whispers, sounding entirely unconvincing, and you frown before looking to your hand thatâs apparently been clutching his jacket this whole time.
âoh, yeah. sorry.â
âitâs okay.â he assures you, pointing to the ceiling. âwe should probably head back.â
you agree and sling the bag over your shoulders, on your back. he gets onto the desk first so he can climb out the same window you used to get in, and once heâs gotten up the roof again, he extends his hand to you so he can pull you up.
it doesnât go smoothly. heâs a little clumsy, but he manages, so you take a breather once youâve made it out of the office with him. you close the window in the exact position it was before you opened it, and you make it to the safety of the rooftop where you started just twenty minutes ago.
as you quickly go down the stairs of the abandoned building to reach the ground floor, he laughs triumphantly. âholy fucking shit. i canât believe we actually pulled that off.â
you smile at him with adrenaline still rushing through you, heart still pounding in your chest when you realize what you just did.
and honestly, you donât think youâve ever felt that⊠alive.
a mere fifteen minutes later, youâre seated in a half-empty diner with him. heâs across from you in the booth, elbows on the table as he fiddles with his fingers.
while he looks around the place, you take the files you found in the safe out of your bag so you can look them over.
as your eyes fall onto the first page, you frown.
mingyu notices your gaze. âwhatâs wrong?â
you switch to the other file folders before scoffing to yourself, realization hitting you. âyou gotta be fucking kidding me. theyâre tabs he kept on the people around him. the staff at home, his driver... even me. and you. well, looks like he didnât trust you completely.â
before he can even reply to the subtle dig, you slide the folder with his name on it across the table, and he opens it up, noticing a huge chunk of information on him neatly stashed away in separate documents. thereâs even candids there that mustâve been made by a private investigator.
âi knew he was paranoid, but this takes the cake.â you mutter, and you throw the folders back into your bag, and mingyu hands you his so you can take it as well.
âwell, this sucks.â he sighs. âthose files arenât of much use, so now weâre back to square one.â
you tilt your head. âthatâs not entirely true. we might be able to check where the gun came from, or whose name itâs registered under.â
mingyu hums, lifting the cup to his mouth, whispering a compliment, not really expecting for you to hear it. âsmart girl.â
with your bag zipped up and everything off the table again, itâs quiet between you and mingyu for a moment.
âgod, iâm starving.â he says as you wait for your food to arrive, and where heâs slightly fidgeting in his place, you sit completely still, looking at him with a frown. once he catches your gaze, he raises a brow at you. âwhat?â
âdo you do this often?â
âeating in a cheap diner?â
âtrespassing. breaking in. illegal activities. whatever you wanna call it.â
he shrugs. âoccasionally. keeps life interesting, yâknow?â
the casualness in his attitude makes you scoff. âsure.â
âyou donât agree?â
âi didnât say that.â
âno, but then again, you donât really say much at all.â he says bluntly. he doesnât mean it as an offensive statement in the slightest, but it wouldâve probably sounded better if worded differently.
for a moment, he thinks his impulsivity mustâve upset you, seeing as you remain silent for a moment.
then you laugh at him. the sound is completely new to him, yet strangely soothing to his ears.
âyouâre bold, iâll give you that.â you snicker before taking a sip of your coke. âbut i assume you donât have an issue with people who are on the quieter side, since youâre besties with wonwoo and all.â
mingyu mimics your facial expressions. âyeah, i prefer being around quieter people more. but i didnâtâit came out wrong. i meant, you donât really, like... show who you are. if that makes sense. even back when we were in high school, you were like a mystery. you still are, to me.â
âis this what this whole partnering-up thing is about? you wanting to unravel the mystery about me? because if it is, iâll give you credit for the creativity.â
mingyu tilts his head. âwell, itâs a little more nuanced than that.â
âif you wanted to get to know me, why didnât you try years ago?â
âhave you met you?â
you roll your eyes. he smirks at you, enjoying your company quite a lot, anticipating whatever it is youâll say in response.
âyou wanna know something, mingyu?â
âyeah.â
âyouâre telling me iâm the mysterious one, but iâd say thatâs you.â
his playfulness falters a bit, and he shows his confusion instead. âme?â
âmhm. youâre popular, good-looking, charming, all of that â and i think youâve got layers to yourself that no one even knows about. characteristics no one would ever dare imagine when they think of you.â
his breath hitches in his throat. âwhy do you think that?â
twisting your lips into a pout, you put your drink back down on the table. âwouldnât be any fun if i outright told you, would it?â
mingyu narrows his eyes at you. you just shrug, as if to tell him heâll figure it out, if heâs smart enough.
and he welcomes the challenge.
âokay.â he smiles, biting his lip when he leans back in his seat. âbut, hypothetically â what if youâre wrong about me? what if i donât have those layers youâre talking about?â
you eye him up and down, remaining quiet with your arms crossed over your chest. youâve always had that attitude. like you know more than everyone else, as if youâre the smartest person in the room. usually, you are. and yet youâre never smug about it, unless someone challenges you to be â youâre always calm, cool, collected. stoic. the fact that wonwoo of all people called you an ice princess years ago says enough.
âiâd be sorely disappointed.â
âso you have high expectations of me?â
âin a way, perhaps. though youâll have to work a little harder to impress me.â
âtonight wasnât enough?â
âit was a start. we still loathe eachother, remember?â
âright. iâll keep that in mind for next time.â
sure, you and kim mingyu hate one another, but he still makes you smile the most anyone has in ages, and you make him feel more alive than anyone else has.
vii. FRIENDS CLOSE, ENEMIES CLOSER
âiâve got bad news.â you say, tapping your nails on the coffee table in your living room as you have mingyu on speaker.
âokay. do tell.â
âthe gun isnât registered, so we pretty much only have the files as evidence.â
âyeah. i doubt your father put those files together himself, since they seem like the work of a professional. we might be smart to seek out the private investigator who gave him the intel.â
you know he hears you sigh at the other end of the line, and your response hardly sound convincing. âyeah, i guess.â
âwhatâs wrong?â
itâs quiet for a moment. you speak up with a tension rumbling in your chest. âmaybe we should just quit, gyu. i donât feel like what weâre doing is actually going anywhere. we still donât have a proper lead.â
then itâs his turn to remain silent, and you swear you can hear his breath shudder. âweâll get there. it just... takes some time.â
âyou sound a little too sure of that.â
âi just think itâd be a waste to not continue after the stunt we pulled last week.â
âwhatâre we gonna be doing next? breaking into the national bank?â
âsomething tells me youâd find that exciting.â
well, shit. have you become so transparent that kim mingyu of all people can tell the truth about you?
âmaybe i would.â you grumble like a child admitting defeat.
the sound of his laughter echoes through the phone. it subconsciously brings a small smile to your face.
âlook, i have a meeting âtil five. i can come by after to brainstorm about things, pick up some food on the way. are you free tonight?â
âyeah. text me when youâre on the way here.â
âyes, maâam.â he jests, saying heâs got to go before hanging up. it leaves you to stare at your phone for a minute. a past version of yourself would never believe it if you said mingyu would ever get close to you in the way he has over the past two months. itâs been a strange time. itâs come to the point youâre pretty sure you donât even hate him as much as you used to.
maybe you donât even hate him at all anymore. maybe.
but something about admitting that to yourself feels scary, so you put your thoughts elsewhere while secretly looking forward to having him come over again.
itâs a quarter past five when he sends you a message, letting you know heâs picked up the food and on the way to your house, and a mere twenty minutes later, you and him are seated in the lounge on the first floor as he tells you about his day â all while shoving a dumpling into his mouth.
what interrupts you, however, is the noise of your doorbell. mingyu frowns instantly, and you mimic his expression, because you werenât expecting any more company. âwhoâs that?â
âno idea.â you shrug, so you get up from your seat, jogging down the stairs with mingyu following you, simultaneously chewing the food in his mouth.
checking the screen beside the door thatâs connected to the doorbell, you notice a familiar face standing outside.
âisnât he the main detective on the investigation?â mingyu asks rhetorically, his body language changing to something more stiff. âwhat is he doing here?â
âgood question. i certainly didnât invite him, but the guy at the front gate probably told him i was home. fuck â you have to hide.â
âhide? why?â
because the detective thinks you still hate mingyu, so seeing him here would make your story hardly plausible. âbecause he canât see you, obviously. get upstairs and stay there. iâll distract him.âÂ
âare you sure?â
âyeah, so go!â you push him back with your hands on his chest, and he seems hesitant to leave you by yourself, but he eventually jogs up the stairs again to get out of sight.
the inspector smiles only as a formality. you do the same. you havenât spoken to him since you indirectly accused him of being an asshole, a while before your fatherâs funeral.
âgood evening. i hope i havenât come at a bad time. may i come in?â
âi have to take a business call soon, actually, so another time would beââ
âi wonât be long. i assume youâd like to have an update on the investigation?â
well, fuck. heâs got you there, so youâre forced to let him in, but you donât let him wonder and gesture for him to sit down in the living room, on the couch. you move to take the seat directly across from him to ensure his focus is on you, instead of on the huge staircase behind him.
âam i still at the top of your list?â you ask. when the man tries to find the right words to respond, you scoff, filling in the blanks. of course you still are. âbut you have no evidence.âÂ
âitâs not about evidence â moreso the lack thereof. iâm stuck with two people who each have a solid motive, an alibi thatâs far from foolproof, and an important tie to the victim. you cannot deny that.âÂ
âis this another interrogation? because this is all off-record.â
ânot an interrogation. i was just wondering something â back when i spoke to you last, before your fatherâs funeral, i asked what you could tell me about kim mingyu, your fatherâs former associate.â hearing him say his name makes you anxious, yet you pull every possible muscle to hide it. âyou spoke of him as if he were the devil himself. you clearly hated him, perhaps more than you hated your father.â
âand?â
he pulls something from the inside of his jacket, and you discover theyâre a few candids, photos taken of you with mingyu while out in the city. well, thatâs just fucking great. youâre gonna have to make use of your top-notch acting skills here.
âiâm sure you wouldnât mind me asking why youâre suddenly seeing someone you claim to hate as much as you do.â
the blankness of your face dissolves as you adapt a more playful and sassy persona. âyou came all the way to my home for this? a few photos?â
âa few photos of my two main suspects together for a reason i cannot think of, yes.â
âyou canât think of a single thing? really? no offense, but i was under the impression you were at least a little clever.â
the man stares at you as if heâs trying to solve a puzzle. that can only mean one thing â heâs falling for your act.
what an idiot.
you lean forward in your place, the dry smile remaining on your face. âi fucked him. several times, actually.â
he narrows his eyes at your statement. âi thought you told me you hated him.â
âoh, i do. but a good hate-fuck is the best way to release some frustration. you should try it sometime.â the sound of your voice is monotonous as you utter the words in one go.
âiâll keep it in mind.â he sarcastically responds with a fake smile, and you copy his body language, pleased to see youâve made him somewhat uncomfortable.
he clearly wants to change the subject, but you donât feel like continuing this conversation any longer. âif youâll excuse me, i really have more pressing matters, so i trust you can see yourself out.â
the inspector huffs a bit, but he knows better than to overstay his welcome. he wordlessly allows you to let you walk him to the door before turning around. âi hope you know who youâre dealing with. not everyone is who they say they are.â
leaving you confused, he looks at you a moment, proceeding to walk out your front door, after which you close it. did he know more than he was willing to let on? what a strange visit.
when you finally decide to turn around, you see mingyu standing in the middle of the stairs, looking a little baffled, at which you roll your eyes.
âwhy would you tell him that?â
âwould you have preferred it if i told him the truth?â
âwould that be so bad?â
you scoff, passing him on the staircase. âsee, this is what i mean when i say youâre not as smart as you think you are.â
mingyu follows you back up to the lounge. âiâm just saying â maybe itâd make us look less suspicious.â
âitâd do the opposite, gyu. trust me.â
âokay. fine. but out of all the things you couldâve said, why that?â
âwell, it made him uncomfortable, making it easier to get him to leave early. and, well⊠you know what you look like.â
the last sentence really grabs his attention.
âwhat i look like?â he repeats, knowing damn well what youâre getting at, but heâs eager to hear you spell it out for him.
âwell, youâre somewhat good-looking. itâs one of your few strong points, actually.â
âso you think iâm hot?â
âdidnât quite say that.â
âno, but you implied it.â
ânot really. you may be conventionally handsome, gyu, but attraction is a whole different thing.â
âoh, câmon. admit it. iâm willing to, soâŠâ
âdo i need to remind you i said weâd keep things professional? which you agreed to.â
âgod, youâre so tough.â
âpart of my charm. maybe thatâs why you like me so much.â
âi never said i liked you.â
âno, you didnât have to.â you scoff, laughing at him, and mingyu feels the corners of his lips curling up â because youâre right.
then, as you plop down on the seats in the lounge again, you sigh as you look at the papers scattered across the table.
âyou know, itâs been weeks, and we still havenât got the slightest clue whoâs the killer,â you frown, fingers resting on your collarbone, âand if iâm being honest, i doubt we ever will.â
mingyu briefly narrows his eyes at you, proceeding to take his laptop out of his bag. you watch curiously when he silently types away at his keyboard, then turning the device around and clicking on the play button.
suddenly you hear your own voice, and the words â you said those during the interrogations. how the hell did he get his hands on those recordings?
he seems to be able to read your mind. âiâve got a contact in the force. he sent me the sorted files of everyone who was interrogated. we should probably listen to them, right? after all, we know more about the situation than the detectives.â
blinking a few times, you shrug and nod in agreement, so he increases the volume and presses the button again.
the following two and a half hours are spent listening to the recordings and taking notes of important things. youâre only halfway through them, but doing this the whole time really sucks you dry of energy.
at a certain point, you press the pause button and get up from your seat, moving to the liquor cabinet a few meters away. âyou like a good whiskey, right?â
âyeah. howâd you know?â
âi observe and listen. that, and i heard you say it to wonwoo one time.â
he chuckles at your words, watching you take the bottle with two glasses and set it down on the table.
once youâve poured the liquid into the glass, he takes what you offer him and down it in one go, after which you give him a judgemental stare. âseriously?â
âsorry. had a rough day.â
your gaze softens, and you pour him a second glass as he holds it out. âwhy?â
âi just⊠havenât been feeling great lately. not really sure why.â
well, thatâs interesting. âyour conscience eating away at you?â
his eyes widen an uncharacteristical amount, and your face is blank for a few moments until you crack a smile. he laughs it off, squeezing his hands together, which you take notice of.
âguess you could say that. no, i donât know. my sisterâs been stressed and she wonât tell me why, which is odd âcause she always comes to me â and my motherâs been overworking herself, and iâm worried for her.â
pursing your lips together, you cast your eyes down for a moment.
for some reason, you feel a sense of repulsiveness whenever mingyu speaks of his family like that. as if itâs a reminder of what you didnât have.
but you donât show it.
âsounds tough.â you reply, not intending to sound distant â you just find it difficult to know what to say.
what you fail to recognize is that mingyu sees it. he sees your struggle and the emotions you think are so deeply hidden underneath the surface. they actually are, to be honest, but heâs come to know you and with that the way you hold yourself. and heâs suddenly able to read you better.
youâre made of sharp edges only â broken glass on all sides.
he takes another sip of his drink. you down yours in one go.
âcan i ask you something?â
âsure.â
mingyuâs eyes curiously follow your every move, the alcohol in his system making him bolder. âhow are you holding up?â
âme? âm fine. why do you ask?â
âi think mostly âcause iâve asked you a lot of questions, but not that one.â
the words make you silent for a moment, and you let out a knowing sigh when you realize what heâs getting at. âi told you i was glad he died, gyu.â
âi know. but even if you are, you can still find it difficult to deal with.â
you inhale and exhale slowly, leaning back against the wall for a moment, staring into nothing. âiâm not sad that heâs gone. i never will be. but thereâs things i wanted to ask him.â
when you donât continue, he asks you to. âwhat things?â
âthings about my youth, my mother⊠hell, maybe even about you.â you shrug, chuckling for a brief moment, but the sound is gone as soon as it came. âbut i think, mostly, iâd ask if he saw himself in me.â
mingyu is intrigued by your answer. âwhy would you wanna know that?â
you shrug, your tiredness contributing to you opening up. âbecause maybe iâd hear the answer i want to hear, and not the one i currently have. my worst nightmare has always been to turn into him.â
âyou wonât be like him.â he tries to tell you, but you shake your head.
âi already am. i hated him to the bone, and yet i act like him, sound like him, handle things like him â because he taught me everything i know. at the end of the day, i am my fatherâs daughter. thereâs no changing that.â
âyouâre not a bad person. he was.â
âhow would you know? he was nice to you. stand-offish, probably, but nice.â
âyou donât think i had an idea of what kind of person he was? i cared for him, but i knew he could be harsh. i caught some bits and pieces when he⊠yelled at you after our high school graduation.â
you have an almost visceral reaction as he mentions the incident. your father had yelled at you after the graduation, because the best student of your class got a prize on the big podium, and it wasnât you. and that as a result made your father angry, because being in the top five wasnât enough â because it shouldâve been you.
it was always supposed to be you.
âwhy did you even want to be around him at all? if you knew how much of an asshole he was all this time.â
mingyu stares at the wall for a few seconds when he thinks about it. âhe came into my life when i needed it the most. but looking back, i feel guilty. i shouldnât have cared for someone like that.â
âlike what?â
âsomeone that cruel. he didnât deserve to be loved or cared for, not in any way.â
âcan only good people be loved?â you ask in return, and he seems positively surprised at your question.
âyouâd find love for a bad person?â
âmingyu.â you say his name in a brief chuckle, and it steals his breath away. âdo you think you have that much of a choice over who we love? we donât. thatâs what makes it so complicated.â
he seems to grow increasingly stressed with each thing you say, much to your surprise. âbut would you want to love someone like that?â
looking away from him for a moment, you think his words over. âif that person was good to me, and had the same values⊠yeah, i would. trust me, the few people i care about are no saints, and yet iâd go to hell and back for them.â
âam i on that list too?â
you meet his eyes, and his expression is so beautifully genuine, full of raw emotion youâve never seen him show before. itâs then that it finally hits you â kim mingyu actually cares about you.
the worst thing is that you just might care about him, too.
so you gently smile at him with a light shrug of your shoulders. âmaybe.â
he reciprocates it, his brown eyes blown wide as he gazes at you. âiâm glad. youâre on my list too, yâknow.â
âam i?â you tease, and he nods cheerfully, happy to have verbalized his appreciation for you. âwell, i didnât really see it coming, thatâs for sure.â
your words bring mingyuâs thoughts back to the death of your father, the rift you accused him of causing between the two of you. a wave of guilt comes flooding in once more.
âlook, i⊠i know you may not believe me, but i genuinely feel sorry for what happened. for taking something from you. despite the things i saw and heard, i really was too stupid to see that your dad treated you as badly as he did.â
staring him right in the eye, you donât fail to catch the earnestness in them. âitâs alright. youâre not half as much to blame as iâve tried to make myself believe you were.â
the words intrigue him. âhow come?â
swallowing the lump in your throat, you press your lips together. âbecause he didnât care about me. he never did. maybe he was different before my mother died, maybe he wasnât. i wouldnât know.â
mingyu tries to hold his ground as he watches you get emotional. he remains quiet in his spot next to you.
âcan i tell you something?â your voice is hesitant and almost inaudible, like a child whoâs trying to tell their parent they did something wrong.
when he silently nods, you continue.
âyou wanted to know why i hated you, right? well, i...â you pause in an attempt to find the right words, âi felt invisible to my father. like i didnât matter â i was treated like nothing more than a tool to improve his businesses. but you... he treated you like a son. like a person. and i spent years trying to figure out what i did wrong and you did right, and i just... i didnât get it. i still donât. but whatever it was, i was jealous that you had it and i didnât. and everyone loved you and praised you, be it our friends or their parents. everyone in our social circle. from my point of view, no one had ever uttered a single bad word about you, and then when my father began to take a liking towards you as well... i just hated you. you were my perfect scapegoat.â
the guilt on his face is clear as day. when he parts his lips, you already know he wants to apologize again, but you shake your head, speaking up first.
because you donât hate him anymore.
âmingyu, there was nothing for you to take away from me to begin with. long before you were even present in his life, he didnât care for me either.â with the corners of your lips turned down, you continue. âi did everything he asked. perfect grades, perfect manners, perfect social life. but he didnât care. itâs not often i say people have no heart, but he just⊠he just didnât have one. for his job, perhaps, for his business partners â but not for anyone outside of his work. i just didnât think that would go for his own child, too.â
you reach for your forehead, trying to take his attention away from your face, running your hand through your hair while blinking your tears away. why are you telling him all this?
but it just feels so good to finally get it all out.
âyou did the best you could.â he tells you, and you nod with watery eyes.
âi did. and somehow, none of it mattered.â
when the first heavy sob leaves you, you try to hold it back, not wanting him to see you break down.
he doesnât let you. he moves to sit next to you and takes you into his arms, and for the first time in however long, you let yourself break. the tears are your acknowledgement of the pain it has caused you over the years, the damage that will never quite heal and always follow you wherever you go.
youâre not sure why youâre falling apart this easily. you hardly ever cry anymore, perhaps a few times a year, and you usually feel strong enough to hold it all back when youâre in front of others, but this time â this time, you just canât.
âitâs alright, sweetheart. itâs okay. youâre alright. heâs gone now.â he whispers into your ear as comfort. âbut youâre not alone. not anymore.â
his heart shatters when he internally makes the comparison between the loving family he grew up in and the lonely, broken family you could hardly call home.
âwhy wasnât i enough? why didnât he like me?â you mutter to yourself, having lost control as you cry into mingyuâs neck, clinging onto his body as your chest aches.
âbecause he couldnât. he didnât have it in him to care for anyone. that says more about him than it does about you.â he responds, gently stroking your hair, even pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
and for the first time in a long time, you feel⊠cared for. like you truly matter to someone.
something that feels scary, perhaps even strange, but good.
mingyuâs big arms cage you into his hold, a comforting feeling. to be honest, you wish you could stay with him like this for the whole night. maybe even longer than that.
he rubs your back, feeling the pain in your chest as if it were his own. heâd take all of it if he could. you were damaged in a way that no one deserves, and seeing how much it still affects you and most likely will in the long term, that tears him apart.
the heavy ache in your chest subsides, yet you still cling onto him. you feel the most at ease youâve ever been with anyone.
âthank you.â you mumble, giving him a tight hug with you wrapping your arms around him âtill heâs almost suffocating. âi needed that.â
âanytime.â
you eventually finally come down from your breakdown, body slightly twitching as the last tears silently roll down your cheeks.
with your head in his lap, you lay on your side, closing your eyes for a while as the pain in your chest slowly subsides. heâs still rubbing at your clothed skin, and youâre curious if heâs aware it does wonders for calming you down.
âiâm sorry for yelling at you, gyu. after the funeral.â you speak up, voice still raspy. âi was wrong about you.â
mingyu feels his throat tighten up. âitâs okay. i was wrong about you, too. we have more in common than i initially thought we did.â
you wipe your tears away and move to sit upright, finally feeling confident enough to look him in the eye again. âlike what?â
both of you are tired. everything thatâs happened the past weeks has definitely been causing some sleepless nights for both of you, and with all the alcohol and emotions running high, youâre both feeling a tad drowsy.
he runs a hand through his dark locks. âthis part of society â i think itâs exhausting, a lot of the time. full of noise, small talk thatâs supposed to hide how cold half these people are, social pressure, all of that. but here, at home, itâs quiet. maybe a little too quiet. the thing is, i have my friends and family that i care about more than anyone else, but i still feel⊠hollow. like iâm missing something.â
you nod at him. âyou can be surrounded by people and still feel lonely.â
âyeah.â he sighs. âdo you feel it too?â
âwell, i may not have a family, but i have my friends. and they mean so much to me, and i can talk to them if i need to, but⊠yeah. i feel it too.â
he wonders if you feel the same connection that heâs feeling right now. heâs drawn to you like a damn magnet.
mingyu already knows heâs a goner when he gently puts his hand on your cheek. he feels electrified by your presence, your voice, even the way you look at him.
he needs you.
âmaybe we can be lonely together.â
his words are enough for your breath to hitch in your throat. you doubt youâve ever wanted to have someone as much as you do now.
and so you cross a line you never thought you would and press your lips to his, desperately needing his touch.
the kiss is harsh but slow, as if youâre aching to taste eachother. his hand makes its way to the back of your head, the other on your back to pull you closer to him.
his heart might as well be lurching out of his chest. god, he feels that excitement and nervousness as if he were his teenage self sharing a first kiss with his crush â yet whatever feeling is clouding his mind is something darker and deeper, something that transcends what he can describe with words.
he kisses you like his life depends on it. once youâve both pulled back to get some air, looking the other straight in the eye, itâs like youâre silently admitting that the relationship you share is more than just being partners.
itâs something that comes alarmingly close to love.
the moment is harshly interrupted when his phone rings. he blinks a few times before rolling his eyes at the timing, as heâs still half on top of you.
you can do nothing but wait underneath him as he takes the call, and when he closes his eyes and releases a sigh, you know itâs not positive.
âalright, thank you.â he says before hanging up, turning his focus to you. âthe alarm at my apartment in the city was triggered. i gotta check it out, iâm sorry.â
âitâs fine.â you mutter out, suddenly unsure of how to talk to him now that youâve crossed the line that you have.
but mingyu is much more straightforward. his gaze is warm and intense as it finds your eyes, and he wants nothing more than to stay here with you. so he shows you that.
just when your lips are about to touch again, he smirks, gently holding your chin. âiâll be back for this.â
with those words, he catches his breath and gets up from the couch, after which he jogs down the stairs, and half a minute later, you hear the front doors open and close.
the sound allows you to release the breath youâve been holding.
what the fuck have you gotten yourself into?
thank you for reading. let me know if you enjoyed it x
READ PART TWO HERE
Âź SANAKIRAS â do not repost, remake or copy my work in any way whatsoever. translations are not allowed.
#kim mingyu x reader#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#svthub#mingyu x reader#seventeen smut#seventeen fanfic#svt smut#seventeen imagine#svt imagine#kim mingyu ff#kim mingyu angst#svt fic#svt angst#svt fanfic#svt imagines
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hello yes i am Seeing i am Looking and i am Envying how succinctly you sum up what took paragraphs for my loquacious ass to get around to
kaz and wylan are very much foils, and while much has been said about their similarities and how their stories parallel each other, itâs also worth noting that while kaz gives up his rietveld identity to survive in the barrel, wylan clings to what makes him wylan throughout his time in the barrel. when kaz loses everything, he throws away goodness and honesty; when wylan loses everything, he clings to goodness and honesty because itâs all he has left. they have fundamentally different backgrounds which obviously influence their choices and outlooks on life, but itâs interesting nonetheless!
#i don't really follow people i just check their shit manually so i'm just seeing this and !!!#i also enjoyed what you said in the tags of that one foil post and it made me Remember a Thing which i have elaborated on elsewhere#on another note mentioning class really has me Thinking.#there are lots of factors but class definitely informs their choices especially bc the national religion is so tied to class and wealth#for Kaz money is protection because when they lost what little they had he was exposed to serious harm#making as much as possible through illegal means is part of how kaz protected himself#meanwhile wylan had access to money growing up but it did not protect him from physical or emotional harm in his early life#and his father's station and wealth and piety were part of the reason he mistreated his son in the first place#so as kaz puts it wylan takes the luxury of turning his back on luxury#they're going in opposite directions for safety kaz moves toward wealth and wylan tries to distance himself#wylan made money to survive rather than to protect himself does that make sense?? it wouldn't protect him from his father trying to kill hi#he also just spent longer in an enviro where people could [literally] afford to be gentle and kind so he was like ok imma keep doing that#also where is the religious trauma leigh. i know he has it have you ever heard his father where is it#wylan got to spend his childhood off the streets but he also never got to go on the streets that boy was locked inside his house#maybe this will turn into a coherent thought one day#anyway. huh where am i i'm scared#i blacked out and when i woke up there were paragraphs of class analysis about a rich boy in a ya novel in the tags someone come pick me up#six of crows#soc#tgt#kaz brekker#wylan van eck#soc meta#reblog#fine it's related#bfwp
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kiss your best friend | diasomnia
kiss your best friend and see how they react!
parts. one , two , three , four , five , six , seven
characters. malleus, lilia, sebek, silver
content. gender neutral reader as usual, mentions of murder by lilia's cooking, someone faints lol
note. finally last part after ten years /j
malleus
goes absolutely silent but his surprise is definitely there -> eyes widen, brows raise on a miniscule scale. you'd think the guy would be all lowkey about his joy but five seconds later and there are comical sparkles surrounding his face.
I mean. you had to formally confirm that you two were friends before, and you had off-handedly linked his name and best friend in the same sentence a few months later (he was bursting for like a week.) and now all that?
thrown away, nu-uh. you two are NOT friends no more, he doesnât have a single care in the world. he's throwing the friends label off a cliff with his foot and skipping off with joy cause you just got upgraded to the next ruler of briar valley wink wonk.
or perhaps you'd like being referred to as his consort? he can always make the people refer to you as both.
if you're wondering why he's so silent all of a sudden; malleus: already thinking of how he'd decorate the castle when you move in with him. maybe... he can break down the wall to link your two bedrooms togetherâwait no he'd very much like to share the same room instead..
"child of man, do you prefer violet or green?"
"uh... green...?"
"excellent choice, you have my gratitude."
the thing you should be asking is 'why' because it's either the main color theme of your wedding or the gem he'd engrave on your ring (he's very happy it's green though, since it'd be a constant reminder of him.. oh he knows! he should get his a color of your eyes tooâ)
someone stop him.
lilia
spiderman kisses spiderman kisses spiderman kisses spiderman kisses
more knowledgeable than malleus about the level up of relationships so he doesn't jump from best friends to newlyweds immediately. actually he doesn't even need a label, if you're going around kissing him he's just gonna act like you two are a married couple without a confirmation on your status'
"darling, could you hand me the sugar?"
"lilia, I hope you know that you're supposed to use salt for the sauce not sugar." <- *passes the right bottle*
ignoring lilia's attempts on lives he acts pretty normal.
ahem, besides the fact that your first kiss on him has made him come to the conclusion that he can now incorporate kisses in your daily routine since you've already done it, so apparently that means he can too.
kiss him once, he kisses you thrice I guess. it's either the occasional jumpscare from the ceiling since he felt like reminding you of his love through a pack or the times you blink and feel a sensation against your lips without seeing anything cause his affection can be silent as it is loud you suppose.
pov student you were speaking to who definitely saw that but you didn't midst your blink: đšâ
"lilia are we dating."
"i suppose it would make us more official like you humans like, so of course~"
he just accepts it without any complaints, just announce you're spouses and he'll accept that too probably.
#chill
silver
if we have spiderman kisses surely we can have the sleeping beauty kiss?
sleeping beauty kisses sleeping beauty kisses sleeping beauty kisses sleeping beauty kisses
I reckon he would be a pretty light sleeper though the quantity of his sleep is more often than not so even though he accidentally passes out a lot he's really easy to wake. trained to be vigilant and all, courtesy of his murderous father (well, murderous through food?)
he knows the weight of certain things. a blanket draped over him, the feeling of something squirming on his shoulderâa squirrel, most likely. something on his head, a bird or some other critter. but this?
a light press on his lips, gone as quickly as it came. that, he isn't sure of. the animals don't tend to linger around his face so the unknown origin of it has curiosity opening his eyes.
and boy, he is trying to find every reason to not believe that you didn't peck him.
perhaps they touched it? he furrows his brows lightly, attempting hard at trying to avoid your gaze because he feels guilty at his first assumption, you're his best friend! you wouldn't do such a thing..
"did you touch my lips?"
"nah, is it fine that I kissed you?"
"..."
"..."
*passes out*
is he dreaming?
sebek
in what scenario will sebek even let you near him? hmmm.. I suppose being 'best friends' (he calls you self proclaimed, and that you guys aren't that close but still rages over someone and hits them with an essay why you're so much better than their insults) makes you more tolerable around to be closer.
totally not the fact that he might have a crush on you, which can't be right cause he can't be capable of having feelings for a *gasp* human!
scandalous. he knows.
raises a brow when you do anything but be discrete with your intentions of shuffling closer but he doesn't really double back, okay. he's getting a little concerned now when you continue getting closer, he takes a step back not because you're near or anything but this behavior is... just strange.
you're in his face already and before he can question (loudly) what in the seven's name you're doing before you just casually peck him on the lips?
WHAT IN TARNATION!
stiffens up immediately, his face looks like it's holding in a yell. maybe that's why it's getting so red? he's just standing there with shoulders so tense he looks like he's trying to seem big.
"..." WHAT JUST HAPPENED. DID THIS HUMAN JUST.. NO, WE ARE MERELY BEST FRIENDSâare we even friends.. NO! THIS IS THE MOST INAPPROPRIATE ACT TO COMMIT. THIS HUMAN NEEDS TO KNOW BOUNDARIES. I mean he enjoyed that and allâI mean what..
"why are you so quiet."
if only you knew.
#ă
€ââĄâ . . signed !#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland imagines#twisted wonderland scenarios#twisted wonderland headcanons#twst fluff#malleus draconia x reader#malleus x reader#lilia vanrouge x reader#lilia x reader#silver x reader#twst silver x reader#sebek zigvolt x reader#sebek x reader#x gn reader
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Am I Okay?
~Am I Okay? Megan Moroney~
Author's Note: Requested! I rewrote this like six times and I don't really vibe with it but I hope yall enjoy it! Am I posting this at midnight yes do I care a little bit but oh well Summary: Y/N and Luke fall in love Warnings: smut! smut! smut! MDNI!! swearing Word Count: 9,059 Luke Hughes x fm!reader
It was still dark outside but it usually was when she first got to work. The early morning shift was her favorite to work. Opening the coffee shop at six in the morning alone was her favorite part of the day. The sunrise always managed to shine through the windows. The pink and blue hues were breathtaking.Â
It was usually quiet in the mornings, for the first hour and a half she would see maybe eight customers total. After eight in the morning, she would see thirty customers in an hour. But the first two hours she would be alone and she preferred it that way.Â
The eight customers that would come in at that time were all the same, always on the walk towards their jobs. Specifically one guy who would always walk in few minutes after they opened. He showed up nearly every day that he was in town, always got a basic coffee he could probably make in his apartment but the fifteen dollar tip was enough to not question it.Â
The playlist she put on was catered to her own music taste, her co-worker that usually shows up at eight changes it to the usuall coffee shop eroma.Â
She poured the espresso shots into the iced plastic cup in front of her. She finished her latte with whole milk and carmel syrup. The small set of chims near the door rang and she spun around to see her regular Jack walking inside. His head covered in a black beanie and his usual long black coat.Â
âGood morning Jack,â she said with a soft smile on her lips. He grinned widely as he glanced behind him before he walked up to the register.Â
âMorning, Y/N,â he said as he looked up towards the menu pretending to search for something else to order. He always got the same drink.Â
âThe usual?â she asked as she started tapping on the Ipad. The chims went off as another man walked into the shop. She lifted her gaze and her heart jumped into her throat.
âYeah and whatever my little brother is gonna get,â Jack expressed, looking behind him to see his little brother entering the shop.Â
She met his eyes, they were tired as it was not for the weak to be out on the town this early. His lips curled upward as he met her gaze. His curly hair was hidden by a backwards hat. He walked up towards the counter and it was getting harder and harder to breathe for her.Â
âLukey, this is Y/N,â Jack said, pulling her attention back towards him. Swallowing hard, she realized that she needed to breathe because she was not sure if she was actually doing it or not. Luke nodded as he pressed his lips together as he looked up towards the menu.
Y/N scanned his features, he was tall and the soft smile on his lips was intoxicating. It was too early in the morning for her to feel dizzy. Her gaze looked down towards the Ipad, trying not to stare at him too long.
âDo you have anything thatâs not coffee?â Luke asked shyly. Jack chuckled while rolling his eyes, he crossed his arms over his chest.Â
She fought off a smirk forming to her lips, she glanced behind her towards the menu. âWe have hot chocolate,â she mumbled. Lukeâs smile widened. He squinted his eyes for a moment.
âI guess Iâll take a hot chocolate,â he said as he dragged his hand across his chin. Jack rolled his eyes as he handed Y/N his card. She finished putting in their orders and she completed the order. She spun the Ipad for the tip screen as she walked away from it to start making their drinks.
âFucking, really?â Jack teased as he shoved Luke away. Luke chuckled as he shook his head.Â
âI donât drink coffee, asshole,â Luke muttered as they both stood awkwardly in the center of the shop. Y/N smiled to herself as she began to pour the coffee into the to go cup. After another minute Jackâs coffee was done and so was Lukeâs hot chocolate.Â
She placed the cups onto the counter, âHow long are you visiting Jack?â she asked softly as she looked up and met Lukeâs gaze. Lukeâs cheeks flushed red as he glanced towards Jack.
âHeâs playing his first game with the Devils in a few days,â Jack said proudly. Her eyes widened as she met Jackâs gaze for a moment before she looked back towards Luke.
âThatâs awesome, I forget this hockey thing is a family thing,â she let out shortly as she tried to find the words. The boys chuckled, Luke brought his hot chocolate towards his lips and took a small sip.
âYou should watch it,â Jack teased as he patted his hand against Lukeâs shoulder. Luke turned his head and met her gaze, he smiled softly as he dropped his gaze towards the floor.
âIâll think about it,â she mumbled as she watched the pair leave the coffee shop. Spinning around, she leaned against the counter, widening her eyes. âOh my god,â she muttered barely above a whisper.
~~~
She returned to her on-campus apartment after shift. Her twin brother and roommate Ashton was sitting on the couch with his computer in his lap. Glancing towards her, he didnât say anything beside waving towards her. He leaned forward mouthing something he was reading.
She pulled her coat from her frame and hung it near the front door. Stepping further into the apartment, Ashton glanced towards her. He took note of the smile on her face. It was always hit or miss on her mood after coming home from work. But she never had a smile on her face paired with silence. Usually she steps into the apartment and starts talking instantly.
There was a soft hum falling from her lips as she headed towards her bedroom. Ashton placed his computer beside him as he followed towards her suspiciously. She stood in her room humming a song as she was collecting a new outfit to change into after her shower. Ashton stood in the doorway watching her.Â
âWhatâs wrong with you?â he asked. Turning around, she jumped.
âDamn, Ash, you canât just sneak up to someone like that,â she said while shaking her head. Raising her hands up she took a hold of her hair and pulled it from the updo she had.
âWhy are you smiling like that?â he pressed as he continued to scan her features. She shook her head as she fought off a grin. âYouâre face is doing something weird,â he pointed his finger towards her face. She smacked his hand away from her face as she let out a chuckle. She took in a deep breath as she rolled her eyes. His eyes widened as his mouth fell open, âOh,â he let out knowingly.
âOh, what?â she asked while crossing her arms over her chest, the grin still toying to her lips.
He nodded as he started walking backwards slowly, âNo, I get it,â he said omniously.
âWhat?â she let out, a chuckle leaving her throat.
âDid you meet someone interesting today?â Ashton teased as he was still stepping backwards.
âPlease leave,â she said as she giggled. Ashton threw his head back leaving as he headed down the hall towards the living room. Y/N shut the door as she turned around taking in a shaky breath.Â
She pulled her phone from her pocket to look up his Instagram, if it was public what was the harm in that? Jack followed her on Instagram, which was not entirely strange as she has her own social media presence. She was a popular Tiktoker that had a decent following on Instagram too. So his fans did not find it weird that he was following her.Â
She opened Lukeâs Instagram and smiled towards the most recent photo set. It was his goodbye to UMich, she smiled to herself as she continued to look through the photo set.
~~~
A few days later, she was sitting in the living room with her brother and his friends watching the Devils game. Usually, she would only sit in if the game was a playoff game. Her brother was more into football until he met his college friends. They all would come over to watch the games. Which was nearly every night.
She sat on the floor, a blanket practically submerging her frame. Her brother and his four friends were tipsy and the game hadnât even started yet. Despite it being a Tuesday, they felt that it was important for them to drink.Â
Ashton knew that Jack was a regular at Y/Nâs job and he always teased her about him. But she always brushed it off because she didnât see him like that. But Luke on the other hand, she has not stopped thinking about him since she met him the other morning.
âY/N, any reason youâre joining us tonight?â Ashton teased as he pulled the blanket from her head. She huffed as she took a hold of it and covered her head again.
âGot nothing better to do,â she mumbled.
âYou sure itâs got nothing to do with-â
âAshton,â she scolded as she smacked his shoulder. The boys erupted in ooooohs and she sunk deeper into the blanket.Â
âWhat about that regular of yours?â Ashton further teased as he stood up from the floor to avoid getting hit again. The boys started yelling again as the first period was starting for the Devils.
âAsh, let it go!â she let out while laughing.Â
âJack Hughes is a regular at her coffee shop,â he let out as he ran away towards the kitchen, for protection.Â
âShut the fuck up!â Ashtonâs best friend Logan said loudly. The boys all cheered as if a goal was just scored.
Y/N planted her face into her hands, her face flushing. She lifted her head towards the screen to see the broadcast showing Luke on the bench. She dropped her gaze back into her hands.Â
âIf I tell you, will you leave it alone?â she said as her face was still in her hands. They all cheer loudly together. Ashton jogged back towards the couch and sat on the floor beside his sister. She took in a deep breath as she tilted her head back. âI met Luke Hughes, thatâs all,â she let out barely above a whisper. They erupted in oooohs again and she sunk her head into her hands. âThatâs all, I swear!â she mumbled against her hands.
âI fucking knew it,â Ashton said as tapped his hand against her shoulder.
âCan we just watch the game?â she questioned pointing towards the screen, just at the point when Luke appeared on the screen. They all started laughing.
âThis is going to be fun,â Ashton teased.
~~~
She did not see Luke or Jack for several months after that. It was playoffs and Luke most likely went back to Michigan since he was not eligible to play. The last playoff run, Jack didnât come into the coffee shop once. It was probably because he was sleeping in to get as much rest as possible.
But she was in a new school year, with the same hours. She would work from six in the morning to noon and have afternoon classes after that. She was always busy but it was better than over thinking.Â
For the first time in months, the chims went off and she spun around to see Jack and Luke trailing behind him. She clenched her jaw to avoid showing a wide toothy grin. A little crush was not going to get in the way of her favorite regular. Jack was always super kind and an amazing way to start the day. She refused to let her little crush on his little brother change that.
Until he smiled a sleepy grin towards her. Suddenly her plan backfired and she grinned towards them.
âWelcome back boys,â she muttered while walking towards the register. Forcing her gaze towards Jack, she saw a smirk on his lips. Ignoring it, she started typing in Jackâs usual.Â
âHow have you you been?â Jack asked crossing his arms over his chest. She lifted her gaze, not really used to being asked that question.
âIâve been good, I worked doubles all summer so Iâm happy to be back on my normal schedule,â she explained glancing towards Luke. He hasnât wavered his gaze from the moment he stepped into the shop. Jack nodded while glancing towards Luke, he rolled his eyes playfully.
âYou gonna order or just stare at her?â Jack teased as he punched Lukeâs arm. Luke chuckled as he rubbed the spot Jack hit. She pursed her lips forward as she met Lukeâs gaze for the third time in a matter of two minutes.
âRight, yeah, Iâll take a-â he trailed off as his eyes scanned the menu, âLemonade,â he mumbled. Jack rolled his eyes while pulling out his wallet.Â
She grinned as she typed it into the Ipad before she spun it towards Jack, a new pay system was put into place over the summer.
âSo, is this a new thing? Youâre here for good?â she asked as she started pouring Jackâs coffee.Â
âHopefully, got to make it through training camp and pre-season,â Luke explained while crossing his arms over his chest.Â
âHe will,â Jack offered as he continued to nudge and lightly shove Luke. She thought it was for the best to ignore them and stay in her bubble. She set aside Jackâs drink before she started to pour out Lukeâs lemonade.
âThatâs good, Iâll keep an eye on the games,â she expressed as she added a lid to the lemonade.Â
She took a hold of the drinks and spun around to hand the drinks towards the boys. She handed Jack his drink first, since it was burning her hand. Jack smiled gratefully towards her as he immediately brought it towards his mouth. Meeting Lukeâs gaze she handed him the drink, their fingertips brushed against each otherâs skin for a moment. Pressing her lips together, she quickly brought her hands towards herself.
âMaybe you should come to one of them,â Luke offered, it was obvious the words fell out of his mouth faster than he intended. Maybe the words left his mouth when he didnât want them to. Jack brought the drink towards his lips, glancing towards Luke for a moment before looking back towards Y/N.Â
âYeah, Iâd like that,â she mumbled as she met his gaze. Their eyes remained connected for a few seconds before Jack let out a long drawn out breath.
âThis is the part where you give her your number,â Jack mumbled before stepping away from them, chuckling. Luke clenched his jaw as he fought the grin forming to his lips. His cheeks pinked up as he shook his head slightly.Â
âI was getting there,â he let out while laughing. He glanced behind him to see Jack wandering towards the door. She let out a giggle as she pulled her phone from her pocket.Â
âSeriously, Y/N, he hasnât stopped asking about you,â
âJack,â he let out while he took a hold of her phone to type his number into her phone. She smiled towards Luke as he handed her phone back towards her. She quickly typed a simply hi before she slipped it back into her pocket. âIâll see you,â he muttered before he stumbled away towards Jack. He shoved him out of the door.
âYouâre a real dick, you know that?â she heard Luke say as they both left the shop at the same time.
She spun around, leaning against the counter and shut her eyes. Raising her hand up, she delicately tapped her skin against her cheek to feel heat practically radiating from her skin. âOh my god,â she mumbled.
It didnât take long for the shop to get busy after the boys left. In the middle of a rush, her work best friend, Tommy, jogged inside. Usually, it was busy when Tommy got there but not nearly a line out the door busy. He always blamed it on the back to school students in dire need of a coffee.
âGirl, how are you alive?â Tommy said as he took a plastic cup and read the ingredients before he started making the drink.
âIâm running on pure adrenaline,â she expressed as she began to steam some milk.Â
âOh itâs Semptember, let me guess-â he mumbled. She swated his hand as she began to finish the drink, âOh definitely the pretty boys,â he let out teasingly.Â
âLater,â she mumbled with a giggle leaving her lips.
After thirty minutes the line finally died down and there was no one waiting on a drink. The shop was full to the brim of people with laptops and enjoying a drink. She was cleaning the counters while Tommy was also cleaning a few of the machines. It was a disaster.
Tommy brought his iced coffee towards his lips as he leaned against the counter, slowly wiping it. She fought the grin forming to her lips as she stared towards the coffee grounds spilled in front of her.
âOkay fine,â she muttered as she lifted her gaze to meet Tommyâs. She pulled her phone from her back pocket and held it up to show the unread message from Luke. He leaned towards it and read it. Widening his eyes, his mouth fell open.
âNo way,â he let out. She spun the phone back towards herself to read the hey he replied with. She grinned as she shut the screen off.Â
She went into detail about what happened, excruciating details about how he looked at her, how his cheeks flushed red. Tommy was obsessed with it because every shift he would walk in and expect her to have some information about it but she had none. She was a little miserable about not seeing him.
It was a little embarrassing how often they were chatting and a customer was waiting, but the little five minute encounter was on replay until she left. She texted with him a few times throughout the morning but she could only do so much while she was working.
~~~
Tonight she was going to the game with Ashton and Tommy. It was the first preseason game in October. Since Luke did not play a home game during September, and she only wanted to go to see him.Â
Every morning that Jack and Luke were in town they would stop inside the coffee shop. Luke would stick around for a while waiting for the next set of customers to come in. Jack would get his coffee and leave. She would spent an hour trying to convince him to try a sip of her coffee but he would still refuse. Her mornings felt lonely without him but he always kept her entertained when he was there.Â
Her brother was driving the three of them towards the arena, dealing with awful traffic the whole way there. She was annoyed that he wanted to leave two hours before puck drop but apparently he was right. It was awful when Ashton was right because he never let her live it down.Â
âI cannot believe we are going to this game because of you,â Ashton said while he watched the light turn green, except they didnât move. âYou better let me meet the guy at least,â he begged quietly.Â
She rolled her eyes as she glanced towards Tommy for a moment before she looked out of the window watching the rain hit the window. âMaybe,â she mumbled. Her phone vibrated in her pocket. Pulling it out she saw a text from Luke saying, Stick around after the game, I wanna see you. Nico will stick around too so your brother can meet him. She lifted her gaze glancing towards her brother before she quickly typed an excited reply.
It took nearly another hour before they were parked in the arena. Luke was able to get them lower bowl seats on center ice. He didnât want them close to the glass, felt like too much pressure; even if it was just preseason.
The seats were starting to get full by the time they arrived, the game was starting soon. They found their seats and Ashton was starting to fan girl. âDo you think we can sit here during the regular season? This is awesome,â Ashton let out as he was adjusting the Hischer jersey on his frame. Tommy sat down, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth.Â
She sat in the middle of them, awkwardly glancing around the arena. Sheâs been to a few games when she was a kid but now it felt completely different. Especially since she was told to stay after the game and heâll meet up with her after. He even offered that her brother and Tommy could stick around too. She didnât tell them that. She wanted it to be a surprise for Ashton, Tommy could care less. He was just along for the ride.
The team emerged onto the ice and puck drop started. Even for a preseason game the fans were ecstatic for the whole night. Suddenly it became obvious that she was obsessed with the game. It helped that she had someone to search for the whole night.
Her brother would explain the game to her and Tommy but they were still confused. Tommy was just enjoying the snacks the whole time. Ashton was screaming for every goal, high fiving every person around them. The entire game she was following Lukeâs movements because he was the reason she was there afterall.Â
After the game, both Ashton and Tommy stood up to get ready to leave but she remained seated. Ashton looked down and furrowed his eyebrows. âGet your ass up, letâs go,â Ashton said while waving his hands. She shook her head while staring ahead, a grin toying to her lips. âCome on, dude, Iâm tired,â he whined.
âToo tired to meet the captain?â she teased. His mouth fell open as he immediately sat back down. Tommy chuckled as he sat back down, bringing his seltzer towards his lips.
âDo I get to meet Luke?â Tommy asked as he leaned towards her, raising his eyebrows. She nodded.Â
Luke texted her letting her know that he was having someone come and grab them. It took another ten minutes before a security guard walked towards them asking to see her ID. She showed it to him and he guided them towards the lower level to meet up with the boys.Â
The entire walk down towards the parking garage where the players exited the locker room to, Ashton was talking about how he was going to introduce himself to Nico. Y/N had to calm him down multiple times on their journey down there.
Luke, Jack, and Nico were waiting outside the door. They were all wearing matching t-shirts and shorts while laughing. Luke was the first one to look towards the three of them walking towards them. He smiled widely and led the charge towards them. He walked up to her and hugged her instantly. Her entire body erupted in flames as he engulfed her in a hug. Jack punched his hand against Nicoâs arm as he was teasing Luke behind his back.Â
âUm- Luke, this is my brother Ashton and my friend Tommy,â she said as Luke reluctantly pulled away from her. Luke reached his hand out towards Ashton first. Ashton shyly took a hold of it, all of his talk about what he was going to say to them disappeared. Luke shook his hand before he shifted his gaze towards Tommy, holding out his hand for him.
Tommy furrowed his eyebrows as he scanned Lukeâs features before he shook his hand. Jack jumped in front of Luke to introduce himself to Ashton and Tommy with Nico.
âAshton, nice to meet you man,â Y/N over heard Nico say as Luke took a hold of her hand and guided her way from the group for a moment. Lifting her gaze she met his eye and smiled softly.
âDid you enjoy the game?â he asked softly as he scanned her features. His cheeks were flushed red as he was pressing his lips together. She nodded while looking into his eyes.
âIt was fun, thank you for letting me bring them,â she mumbled as she glanced towards Ashton and Tommy. Tommy was talking with Jack, laughing as they spoke. Ashton was still fangirling with Nico, taking a selfie as they looked over to them.
âOf course,â he mumbled.
~~~
It had been a month since they started dating back at the end of October. Luke was returning home from a roadtrip and she was over the moon. She was tired of waiting for him to call on FaceTime and fall asleep minutes later, she needed to see him.Â
She was starting to fall for him deeply, something she didnât want to do. Sheâs been afraid of falling in love for years but something about Luke made it easy. He was on his way over to her apartment and she was awaiting him.
Ashton walked out of his bedroom and smiled towards her as he walked towards the kitchen, âIâm ordering a pizza, will your boyfriend want any?â he asked.
âYes please,â she sing-songed.Â
âOkay, so Iâll order three pizzas,â he said teasingly. She rolled her eyes. He chuckled as he pulled his phone towards his ear and started to make the order. He opened the fridge and stared inside as he waited for it to ring.Â
It took another fifteen minutes before there was a loud knock on the door. Ashton stood up from the stool he was sitting in near the kitchen. He wandered towards the door, with some specific intentions. She could tell by the dramatics he did while pulling the door open.Â
Lukeâs eyes widened when he saw Ashton instead of Y/N but he forced a smile on his face while he stepped inside.Â
âHey man,â
âOrdered a pizza,â Ashton said as he looked Luke up and down as Luke stepped inside.
She jumped up from the couch and walked towards him, watching his grin go from fearful to genuine in a matter of a second. Luke reached his hand around her waist, pulling her towards him.
âCome on,â she whispered as she guided him towards her bedroom. Ashton stood in the room, staring suspiciously. They walked down the hallway, âSorry,â she mumbled towards him. He chuckled softly as they stepped into her room together. She shut the door behind him as she met his gaze.Â
âMissed you,â he mumbled as he took a hold of her waist. A wide toothy grin formed to her lips as she took small steps behind her towards her bed. Her legs hit the mattress before she turned around and laid down. Luke looked down towards her, grinning before he climbed over her to lay beside her. âI heard there was pizza on the way?â he asked as he laid facing her.Â
Turning her gaze, she met his eye before she leaned towards him, delicately kissing him.
âIâve missed you too,â she muttered against his lips. A hum fell from his lips while he took a hold of her cheek. Rubbing his thumb across her skin, he watched her eyes shut slowly. Luke leaned towards her, pressing his lips against hers. Waiting for her to part her lips to give him access.
Parting her lips, he slipped his tongue into hers as she glided her fingers through his hair. Climbing on top of her, he rested his hands on either side of her head.Â
After a few seconds, there was a loud knock against her door. Luke pulled away, interlocking his fingers as he leaned on his elbow to prop himself up.
âWhat,â she let out, Ashton pushed the door open, leaning against the door frame.Â
He stared towards them for a few long awkward seconds before he let out slowly, âLuke Hughes,â
Chuckling softly, âAshton Y/L/N,â he said as he fought a grin forming to his lips.
âYou travel a lot for work, donât yeah?â Ashton started as he crossed his arms over his chest.
Dropping his head, he let out another laugh, âYes I do.â
âYou behaving?â Ashton said while raising his eyebrows.
âAshton,â she scolded.Â
âSerious question, Y/N. You must have a lot of groupies being a Hughes boy,â he let out taking a step into the room.
âAshton, youâve got nothing to worry about,â he let out as he shifted his gaze towards her. She met his gaze, suddenly self conscious of what Ashton was talking about.
âDonât you have a pizza to go pick up?â she mumbled while looking towards Ashton wide eyed. Ashton met her gaze and scanned her features for a moment before he squinted his eyes suspiciously.Â
âDonât fuck this up and make me hate the Devils, alright?â he let out before he left the room, shutting hte door in the process.Â
Luke looked towards her as she let out a nervous laugh, she shoved her face into her pillow. He chuckled as he took a hold of her waist, trying to make her lift her gaze to meet his eye. âYou know, I mean that right? Nothing to worry about, I literally live in that hotel bed sleeping most of the time Iâm gone,âÂ
She lifted her gaze and looked into his eye and nodded. âYeah,â she mumbled as he took a hold of her cheek, running his thumb across her skin.Â
âYeah?â he let out, somewhat teasingly.Â
âYeah,â she whispered. He smirked before he leaned towards her kissing her delicately. He leaned his forehead against hers for a second, âI mean you do have a lot of groupies,â she teased.Â
âYeah, but youâre my favorite,â he muttered, fighting a smirk forming to his lips. Her mouth fell open as her eyes widened. Pulling away, a chuckle fell from her lips. Luke took a hold of the small of her back, pulling her back towards him. He shook his head slightly before leaning towards her devouring her lips.
âI am not a groupie,â she muttered as she climbed onto his lap. His hands started gliding up and down the backs of her thighs. She continued to kiss him urgently. He hummed against her lips as she tilted her head back, scanning his features.
âStill my favorite,â he muttered as he slowly opened his eyes. She squinted her eyes as she fought the smirk toying on her lips. His hands climbed higher and higher up her frame.
She slowly climbed off of his frame, a pout falling on his lips as she wandered towards the door. She twisted the lock before she walked towards him. He bit his bottom lip as he scanned her features.
âWhat are you thinking?â he asked her as propped himself up on his elbows. She shook her head slightly as she slowly climbed onto his lap again. He rested his hands onto her hips. He rubbed his hands delicately against the fabric of her shirt.
âIâm thinking-â she trailed off before she leaned down and kissed him.Â
Loud bangs hit against her door again, âPizzaâs here!â Ashton shouted through the door. She sat up staring down towards Luke, a huff leaving his lips.Â
âI thought he ordered it for pickup,â she muttered as she climbed off of his lap, he chuckled. Falling onto her back, a pout fell to her lips.
âItâs alright, my love,â he let out as he slowly stood up from the bed. Waiting for her to follow him, she still laid in protest. Holding out his hand towards her, she reluctantly took a hold of it.
~~~
The following morning, Tommy showed up at the same time as the new trainee Brianna. Today was her second shift with Tommy and Y/N. Tommy adored Brianna while Y/N was still warming up to her. It was always overstimulating for her to train someone and Tommy knew that first hand. Which is why he was taking point on the process.Â
âYou are so tense today, I thought Luke came over last night,â Tommy teased as he nudged his elbow against her arm. She rolled her eyes playfully while she vigorously cleaned the machine in front of her. âOh damn, what happened?âÂ
âWe didnât-â she trialed off as she let out a huff of air.Â
âStill?â he let out loudly. She turned around, glaring towards him. He chuckled as he glanced towards Brianna. It was obvious she was listening in. âBrianna, if youâre going to be working with us, youâll need to get in on this,â he said, pulling her towards the conversation.
âTom,â Y/N scolded while laughing. âShe doesnât need to know about my sex life,â
âWhat else do we talk about when weâre here?!â he let out while laughing. âHer and her boyfriend havenât had sex yet,â he let out.
âOh my god,â she mumbled while she covered her face with her hands. Briannaâs eyes lit up as she glanced towards Y/N.
âTheyâve been together for a month and nothing,â he said while leaning towards Brianna.
âOkay, Tommy when was the last time you had sex?â she deflected while chuckling.
âLast night, thank you,â he let out confidently. Both Brianna and Y/N eyes widened as their mouths fell open. âBut weâre not talking about me, weâre talking about Y/N. What is taking you so long?â he teased.Â
âBrianna, my boyfriend and I live with our brothers. And they love interrupting us before we get a chance to get anywhere,â she explained.
âWell, is there a Devils game this weekend?â Tommy asked.Â
âFriday,âÂ
âOkay so see if Luke can get them tickets and then youâll have an empty apartment,â Tommy said confidently. Y/N squinted her eyes as she stared toward him.
âReally think about that Tom,â she said while fighting a laugh rising in her throat. The chimes rang and they shifted their gaze towards the door. Jack led the charge like he always does with Luke trailing behind him. Brianna stared towards them, her mouth agape.
Y/N smiled widely as she met Lukeâs gaze. âHi, she muttered as she continued to look into his eyes. Brianna shifted her gaze towards Tommy, looking for assistance.Â
âOh!â Tommy let out while laughing, he shook his head as he started making Jackâs coffee. âY/N, take your fifteen,â Tommy expressed. She nodded.
âWhat are you guys doing here?â she asked as she pointed towards the empty table at the corner of the shop. He nodded as he followed towards her it. They sat down together, he pulled the chair towards him. Resting his hand onto the inside of her thigh as he pulled her closer to him.
âWeâve got a game at three,â he let out. Her eyes widened as she took a hold of his arm.
âOh my god, thatâs right, I forgot Iâm sorry,â she mumbled. He shook his head as he pursed his lips forward.
âItâs okay, Jack needed caffeine, he couldnât nap,â he explained. She nodded as she scanned his features. âHis girlfriend is back in town, so heâll be staying there tonight,â he mumbled, meeting her gaze. She hummed as she met his gaze suspiciously.
âEmpty apartment?â she asked teasingly. He nodded.
âThank god,â she muttered before she leaned towards him, pecking his lips. He chuckled as he glanced towards Jack who was walking towards them.
âHate to interrupt but we gotta head out Lukey,â Jack muttered as he pursed his lips forward.
âYeah, Iâll be out in a second,â he said. Jack nodded as he walked out towards the exit. âWill you be at the game?â he questioned. She nodded.Â
âAsh will drop me off and Iâm meeting up with Reanne,â she explained. He smiled before he pecked her lips.
âIâll see you after then,â he let out while raising his eyebrows as he walked away towards the door. She leaned back into her chair staring towards the door watching them leave.
Brianna still stood dumbfounded at the center of the register. Her gaze shifted towards Y/N, who was walking back towards the counter. âI know way too much about-â she started before she shook her head.Â
Tommy barked out a laugh before he patted his hand against her back, âThe timing of that was insane,â he choked out.
~~~
The game ended with a win for the Devils, the first win in three games. Throughout the game, her mind was racing with the idea of what their plan was for later that night. Sheâs not used to having pressure on having sex with a partner. Usually, it came up naturally or it happened before they even got together. Something about Luke and how he made her feel, she wanted their first time to be perfect.
But now she was just nervous, almost like it was her first time ever. She sat in Lukeâs car as he was pulling out of the parking garage, not once bringing up their previously discussed plans. She didnât know if he wasnât up for it or didnât want to put any pressure on her.Â
âEveryone going good with the other girls?â he asked as they stopped at a red light directly out of the arena. Tilting his head to the side, he met her gaze. She nodded.
âTheyâve been super welcoming,â she expressed.
He smiled widely as he reached his hand over, taking a hold of her hand, âGood, Iâm glad,â he muttered as he rubbed his thumb across her skin. âAre you hungry?â he asked. She nodded, shifting her gaze towards the traffic in front of her. Furrowing his eyebrows, he took in a sharp breath before pulled his phone from hsi cup holder. He pulled up his Doordash app and handed towards her. Traffic was still taking forever.
âYouâre the best,â she mumbled as she happily took a hold of it and started scrolling through the options. He chuckled as he started driving ahead.Â
The drive took another twenty minutes before they stepped into Lukeâs apartment complex and the food she ordered for them was waiting for them to arrive. He happily took a hold of the food and guided her towards the elevator to lead them up to his apartment. He stood with the take out container in his hands, side eyeing her every soft often.
Squinting her eyes, she turned and looked over towards him suspiciously. âWhy is your face doing that?â she asked while laughing. He pursed his lips forward as his cheeks turned bright red.Â
âNothing,â he muttered as the elevator doors opened to his floor. He stepped out first, holding out his hand towards her. She giggled as she took a hold of it and let him guide her towards his apartment. He stepped up towards the door and unlocked it, pushing inside.Â
They stepped inside, surprised to see the light on. To their surprise, Jack and his girlfriend were sitting on the couch watching a movie. âLukey, hey!â Jack said happily as he perked up. Luke clenched his jaw as he rested their take out food on the counter. He protectively wrapped his arm around her waist.Â
âHey, thought you guys were going to her place tonight,â Luke asked flatly. Y/N pressed her lips together as she started to take their chinese food out of the bag.Â
âWe changed our minds, traffic wouldâve been too bad heading to her place,â he explained as he sat up slightly. Luke nodded silently as he took a hold of the containers and the plastic silverware before he tiled his head to the side. Y/N nodded as she followed him towards his bedroom. He opened the door allowing her to step inside.Â
She climbed onto the bed, crossing her legs, she rested the container in front of her. Luke twisted the lock before he followed her in pursuit. Luke let out a groan as he flipped open his container.Â
âI swear,â he muttered before he ripped open his silverware. Y/N chuckled while rolling her eyes.Â
âAt least heâll be occupied,â she teased. He chuckled as he tilted his head back.
âYeah hopefully,â he said while laughing.Â
He pulled up Greyâs Anatomy, the tv show that they watch together. Heâs never seen and it and itâs her favorite to watch his reactions to the episodes. They were still only on season two.
They sat silently while they ate and watched the show together, glancing towards one another every so often. His cheeks were flushed red. She could tell their minds were busy but she didnât mind. She loved just being with him.Â
âQuestion,â he asked while tapping his hand against her thigh. She shifted her gaze towards him, her heart pounding out of her chest. âAre you sure youâre okay?â
âBecause youâve got this-â he trailed off as he pointed towards the pout on her lips. Her lips curled upward into a smile. âThereâs my girl,â he mumbled, a smirk on his lips.Â
âIâm sorry,â she whined through her smile, âI am just nervous,â she muttered before she brought a bite of food to her mouth.
âNervous?â he asked as he scanned her frame. His eyes widened as realization sunk in. âWhy?â he asked as he jammed his fork into his food. A smirk toyed to his lips.Â
She swallowed her food before pursing her lips forward, âI just feel pressured to make this happen,â she explained motioning between them. He furrowed his eyebrows as he placed his food beside him. He scooted towards her.
âFrom me?â his voice got quiet.
âNo,â she let out instantly, a chuckle falling from her lips. âFrom me mostly an-and Tommy but mostly me. I never really cared this much before, feels weird,â she let out, avoiding his gaze.Â
He smirked as he tilted his head to the side, trying to meet her gaze. âW-Why do you care so much?â he asked barely above a whisper. She pouted as she tilted her head back. His eyes widened as he fought a grin forming to his lips.Â
âStop looking at me like that,â she whined.
âItâll happen when it happens,â he said softly. She rolled her eyes playfully.
âYouâre such a dork,â she whispered. He grinned widely.
~~~
His hand was wrapped around her waist tightly, gripping her to his side as they waited for the elevator doors open. His hand started bunching the fabric of her dress in his hands. A giggle fell from her lips as the doors opened, he rested his hands on both of her hips as he guided her out of the elevator. âLuke,â she let out barely above a whisper.Â
He brushed her hair away from her neck, pressing his lips against her skin for a moment as she began to unlock the door to her apartment. He continued to kiss the skin against her shoulder as she giggled. âLuke.â He pulled away, still resting his hands onto her waist.Â
She pushed the apartment open and he excitedly pushed them inside. The door shut behind them as he excitedly pushed her against the door. Her eyes widened as she took in a deep breath. Her lips curled upward into a wide grin.
At some point, her heels were kicked off of her feet. She doesnât remember when or how but she didnât care.
âIâm so glad Ash is out of town,â she mumbled, looking into his eyes. He took a hold of her waist as he scanned her features.Â
âOh me too,â he mumbled before he took a hold of her neck as pulled her towards him, kissing her urgently. She hummed against his lips as she took a hold of the suit jacket covering his frame and pulled him closer. He glided his hands down her frame, he took a hold of her thighs as she jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist.Â
Her body erupted into flames as his hands gripped her thighs tightly as he guided her towards her room. Still holding her up, he took a hold of the door and pushed it open. He delicately lowered her body onto her bed, she smiled up towards him as she scooted higher up on the bed.Â
He bit his bottom lip as he pulled the suit jacket away from his frame, tossing it to the floor. He brought his hands up and unbuttoned the first button before he climbed on top of her. He instantly connected their lips again as she took a hold of the buttons on his shirt, trying to unbutton them.Â
âMy dress,â she mumbled against his lips.Â
âIs very hot,â he muttered as he started trailing his lips along her jawline, down towards her neck.
âNo,â she said while giggling, she took a hold of his cheeks, forcing his gaze on hers. His eyes widened as he grinned slightly. âI mean, can you help me take it off?â she asked softly. He nodded instantly.Â
Slowly leaning back, she followed in pursuit. Their eyes remained connected the whole time. She slowly climbed off of the bed, standing in front of him. Taking a small step, she faced away from him. Her hair was laid across her back, slowly she took a hold of it and pulled it across her shoulder.Â
Luke raised his hand up and delicately took a hold of the zipper. Slowly, he glided it down to expose her skin. His fingers were hesitantly gliding along her skin. He took a hold of the straps to push the dress from her body. Her body were covered in goosebumps as took a hold of her waist, slowly turning her around to face him. Her body was still covered by her black lace underwear.
His fingertips glided along the fabric over her underwear. Biting her bottom lip, she took a hold of his shoulders. Her hands glided along the fabric as she met his eye, âYour turn,â she whispered. His eyes lit up as he scanned her frame.
âMy turn?â he questioned softly. She hummed as she reached towards the buttons for him. He leaned back on his hands as she leaned towards him, slowly unbuttoning the shirt from his frame. The blush on the apples of his cheeks reddened as his gaze lowered on her frame. The last button popped open, revealing his body. She watched as his ab muscles tensed as the cold air hit his skin.Â
He sat up slightly, pulling the shirt from his frame; he threw it to the floor. Standing up, he looked down towards her. Pressing his lips together, he began to undo his pants. She fought the smirk toying to her lips. Gliding the pants off of his frame, he kicked them away.Â
He smirked as he leaned down and wrapped his arms around her waist. Lifting her up and tossing her down on the bed, she giggled as her back hit the mattress. He climbed on top of her, chuckling before he began to kiss her lips urgently only for a moment. His lips began to trail from her jaw towards her neck.
He slowly began to suck against her skin, biting before soothing the skin with his tongue. Her fingertips started tugging his curls as he continued to trail his lips and his hands down her frame. Tilting her head back, she took in a sudden breath. After a few seconds, âOh my god,â she let out breathlessly.Â
Smirking against her collarbone, he lifted his gaze to meet her eye. Nodding she arched her back and with one hand he took the clasp of her bra and slipped it from her frame. Swallowing hard his eyes lit up as he took in the way she looked. Leaning towards her, he pressed his lips against hers sensually.Â
Softly, he pulled her bottom lip into his mouth sucking in slowly before he pulled away.Â
âYouâre so beautiful,â he mumbled as he scanned her features. A soft smile formed to her swollen lips before she leaned towards him kissing him. His hands began to roam her frame, massaging her skin.Â
She was starting to get more light headed the longer his hands roamed her frame. He looped her lacy underwear with his finger as he slowly started to slide it from her legs. He slipped it to the floor before he took a hold of her thighs. Pulling her towards the edge of the bed. âLu-â she let out as she giggled.
âYeah?â he let out with a teasing smirk as he delicately took a hold of her legs to part them. Looking towards her she nodded as she gripped the sheet beside her as her body tingled with excitement. His gaze lingered on her center as he softly grazed his fingertips across her skin.Â
âYouâre such a tease,â She breathed out.
âOh am I?â he muttered as he climbed up towards her, hovering over her. Looking deeply into her eyes, she nodded as she took a hold of his cheek. Glidng her thumb across his cheek, âI think you just gotta be patient,â he let out slowly. Her eyebrows raised as she pursed her lips forward.Â
âPatient? Iâve been patient for months,â she teased back. He chuckled before he leaned towards her kissing her urgently for a moment.Â
âThen youâre good for a little longer,â he mumbled against her lips.Â
Tilting her head back, she groaned quietly. He leaned towards her devouring her lips, pulling her bottom lip into his mouth again.Â
Several minutes went by before Luke pulled his lips away from hers. He slowly lowered on her frame trailing wet kisses down her frame.Â
Dragging his tongue as his lips got lower and lower on her frame. He took a soft hold of thighs as he slowly parted them, a smirk toyed to his lips.Â
He took his thumb and softly began to rub his thumb against her clit. She took a sudden breath as her grip tightened against the bed sheets. He loved watching her squirm under his touch. A hushed moan left her lips.
 He smiled towards her as he took a hold of her thighs as leaned towards her center urgently.Â
âOh, fuck,â she muttered as her body was overwhelmed with heat as his tongue flicked against her clit.Â
He gripped her thighs as he continued, holding her in place. His tongue continued to suck on her clit as his fingers delved into her center.Â
âOh my god-oh fuck-â her voice started to get louder.
He could feel her thighs start to clench under his touch. He pulled away from her, climbing up her frame, trailing wet kisses up her body. âSuch a tease,â she mumbled as he hummed against her skin.Â
âSo impatient,â he let out before he pressed his lips against hers for a moment.Â
âPlease, I need you,â she muttered as she looked into his eyes.Â
He pressed his lips against hers sloppily for another second before he stood up from her to slip his boxers from his frame. Her eyes widened as smirked towards him.Â
He took a hold of his cock and slowly ran his hand up and down it a few times before he took a hold of her thigh. He further parted her legs, aligning himself with her center. He glanced towards her.Â
Hw pushed inside of her, a low grunt leaving his lips.Â
Slowly, thrusted inside of her a few times before he climbed on top of her. A breathy moan left her lips as he hiked her thigh up slowly as he continued to thrust into her. âFuck,â he mumbled against her lips.
Her breathing was heavy as her hands glided through his curls, tugging them.Â
âSo good baby,â he mumbled against her lips before he started to leave wet kisses against her neck as moans left both of their lips as they were both chasing their climax. âFuck, baby,âÂ
Her entire body tightened as she tilted her head back, a moan left her body as she fingertips dug into his back. He soon followed in pursuit, meeting his own climax. He grunted as he gripped her thigh tightly as they both started breathing heavily. It was as if everything was right in the world at that moment.
Just them, this close and completely falling in love.
He peppered kisses against her skin as he slowly pulled away from her. He laid onto his back as she rolled onto her side to face him.Â
Glancing towards her, he bit his bottom lip as he fought a grin forming to his lips. He reached over towards her, pulling her towards him to lay onto his chest. Resting her head onto his chest, âWow,â she mumbled. He chuckled as he leaned down and pressed his lips against her head.
âSo beautiful,â he mumbled as he glided his hand through her hair.
~~~
The following day, she couldnât wipe the smile off of her face. The entire morning while she was at work, her entire body was oozing with joy. There was no one in the shop when Tommy showed up. Spinning around, she smiled towards him as he walked inside. He furrowed his eyebrows harshly as he walked towards the counter.Â
Y/N slid over the iced coffee she made for him. He pursed his lips forward as he took a hold of the drink. He sipped it for a second before he walked behind the counter.Â
âWhat is wrong with your face?â he asked as he scanned her features. Her eyes widened as she shook her head slightly. âOh my god!â he expressed. She shook her head as she fought a grin forming to her lips.Â
âStop-â
âYou have that glow,â he said teasingly. âYou had se-â
âRemember when I begged you to stop asking about my sex life while at work?â she let out with a grin on her lips.
âOh but youâre the one with-â
âOkay, fine-we did and it was amazing,â she whispered. Tommy threw his hands in the air.
âHallelujah!â Tommy shouted as he wrapped his arms around her.Â
âDonât be weird,â she let out while laughing.
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