#the first one he looked like he just woke up i love him
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hesperisms · 1 day ago
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Sylus and reader just started their relationship and she can’t keep up with sylus’s high sex drive
// Relentless Conqueror
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"As for what's been keeping you up at night, well, I'm more than enough..."
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// summary: you finally admitted to Sylus that you had feelings for him, but you had no idea that getting to see his softer side would also show you how much he deserves his title as a Relentless Conqueror...
// content warnings: 18+ (mdni), dominance, established history, pet names, oral sex, vaginal sex, creampie
// a/n: anon, anon, anon, what have you done to me with this ask! Sylus has been rattling around in my brain since this one came in, begging to be unleashed! hope you're pleased <3
likes, reblogs, comments are always appreciated!
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Sylus' large hands wrapped around your body possessively as you stood at the bathroom counter, his left hand snaking upwards under your oversized shirt to cup your breast, rolling, kneading, squeezing tenderly while his right hand splayed out over your stomach, holding you firmly against him, the pads of his long fingers pressing into your soft skin. "I woke up and you weren't there, kitten...I didn't like it." Sylus purred in a husky, newly awake gravel tone that dripped down your neck as he nuzzled his lips against your ear.
You blushed and reached down to rub your hand over the back of his hand on your stomach, melting into his firm chest pressed against your back. Slipping out of bed about twenty minutes beforehand while Sylus softly snored on his stomach, face down in the pillows, white hair a fluffy tumble was the first peace you'd had to yourself in almost two days. You knew that Sylus was an incredibly driven man, you'd seen his file in Hunter HQ that referred to him as The Relentless Conqueror but you had no idea that would also apply to his sex life. In hindsight, coming to know Sylus and falling for him as you had, you were naïve to think it wouldn't.
Sylus was a man of quiet confidence; you knew anything he committed himself to, he committed himself fully and this newly blossoming relationship with you was something he was giving his all. His passion for you was insatiable, an almost otherworldly hunger had roared to life within him once you'd told him that you wanted to be his. Every deep passionate kiss felt like he wanted to suck the air from your lungs and breathe you in, every possessive shield of his broad chest against you felt like he wanted to meld yourself with him.
Sylus had his other half back.
Sylus was whole again.
The rush that came with knowing that you were his again, that missing piece of his existence slotted back into place had surged his libido and he couldn't get enough of you. He already had a higher than normal sex drive, but the rush of that sweet honeymoon phase that had him so very love-drunk on you had turned his dial into overdrive and your body was struggling to keep up with his appetites.
Sylus had spent a lot of time watching you, studying every little expression and your body language intimately in his time re-discovering you, so he picked up on it in the vanity mirror when you winced slightly as he squeezed your breast. He switched things up and stroked the underside gently instead, kissing your neck and murmuring softly to you as he side-eyed your shared reflection. "I'm sorry sweetie, I know you have a sensitive body," he begins. "Have I been too much for you these last couple of days?"
You blushed, cheeks flushing and you smiled, reaching up to cradle his head against your neck, stroking his hair and he closed his eyes contentedly at the touch. "I know you're making the most of our time together before I have to head back to Linkon tomorrow, but I'm already dreading the suspicious looks I'm going to get from my teammates if I have difficulty sitting down comfortably at the conference table on Monday." You admitted to him with a gentle sigh.
"It's a very large conference table..." Sylus murmurs with a serious tone. "Should I schedule a meeting with your boss so that I have a reason to come ravage you on top of it in front of all of them? You won't have to think up an excuse, that way?" He chuckles wickedly, his warm hot breath fanning over your ear as he teases the idea of outing your relationship publicly. You give his cheek a gentle tap in a mock slap and he huffs, turning you around to face him.
Those hawkish crimson eyes of his glitter with a mixture of mischief, adoration and unbridled lust as he stares down at you, brushing the backs of his knuckles over the side of your cheek tenderly. He slides his hands down under your ass and you instinctively wrap your arms up around his neck, pulling his large frame down into a hug and he melts easily under your touch pecking kisses on the crown of your head, sniffing your hair. "Your scent...I want it to belong to me." he growls as he squeezes your backside and you feel a shiver of anticipation run down your spine.
You bite your lip, tilting your chin up to look up at Sylus, matching that hungry gaze of his with curious eyes. "If I promise I'll be gentle, can I have you again, kitten? I can't smell myself on you strong enough yet, I haven't finished marking you as mine." Sylus whispers, fingertips dimpled into the flesh of your ass cheeks possessively. Your breath catches in your throat at his words and despite the worn-in ache between your thighs from a long weekend of his significant girth stretching you out, you feel your heat start to build, desire stirring in your hips.
Sylus notices your bright eyes darken and your breath adjust. He knows he could carry you off to the bedroom right now and you wouldn't stop him, but he needs to hear your consent; his ego needs you to voice your desire for him, to hear that sweet voice of yours give him authority to lose himself in you. You smile at him seductively and look up through your lashes at him, nodding.
"Take me."
A predatory wolfish grin hits his lips at hearing you voice his claim on you and he scoops you up into his arms, striding confidently back into the bedroom with you and laying you down on the silk sheets of his large bed. You slide the oversized shirt off over your head and toss it at him, aiming for his face. With a cocky grin he flicks the tip of his index finger and a tendril of his evol swirls angry black and red, knocking the shirt away from him.
Sylus slides his silk robe off his shoulders, letting it pool at his feet and he stalks towards you on the bed like a big cat striding down its next meal, eyes locked on yours as he climbs between your thighs, brushing the tip of his nose against yours as he holds his weight above you. "Tell me that I'm the only one you want, Sweetie..." he purrs at you with a seductive, needy tone, fingers brushing your hair away from your neck so he can lean down to sink his mouth on your delicate skin, licking and sucking at your rapidly racing pulse, teeth lightly grazing before his tongue laps the pain away. "Tell me that this beautiful body of yours is mine to worship."
You tilt your head back, closing your eyes and letting your lips part slightly, a soft moan escaping you. He doesn't stop his ministrations on your neck, tongue swirling tantalizing patterns across your throat, but you feel the vibration of an impatient moan he lets out in response to yours.
"Do I need to tell you Sylus?" You laugh with a breathy whisper. "Or is my entire body singing it to you every time you touch me enough?"
His lips burn a trail down your throat, over your collarbones and down onto your chest, your nipples already firm and aching to be touched. Sylus wraps his lips around the sensitive bud, tongue lavishing slow wet curls across it, lovingly kissing it. You gasp in pleasure and close your eyes and as you do, he tilts his face up to watch you while he suckles at you. After a couple of minutes his warm wet mouth swaps sides, making sure he's dedicated attention to both your breasts.
"I'm not quite convinced," he hums, vibrations through your nipple on his tongue making you whimper. "I definitely think I need to hear it if I'm going to stay in control of my urges."
Feeling bold, you reach down and snake your fingers through his thick hair, smiling sweetly and scratching his scalp with your nails. "Do all Crows talk this much, or just mine? I believe I was promised worshipping." You say cheekily, crying out in shock and pleasure as his teeth find your nipple and press down gently in response.
Pulling back from your breasts, he releases your nipple with a wet suck and grins up at you, his devilishly handsome features all angles in the soft glow of the bedroom lamps. He lifts himself up on his knees and makes a show of bowing to you, hand pressed to his heart like he's making a solemn vow. "Let me put my lips to better service of My Lady then" he smirks, dropping himself backwards off the edge of the bed to comfortably rest his head on your inner thigh.
His thumbs rub gently down your delicate folds, your juices quickly slicking them and making their movements sound slick and sinful. Sylus' hot breath tickles your wet heat and he murmurs quietly "so wet for me already Kitten and I've barely touched you...maybe your body is trying to tell me something."
"I think the signs might be there if you squint hard enough." You nod in agreement with him, biting your lip with a soft genuine laugh.
Your laughter stokes his fires of passion for you and it takes all his self restraint not to bury his face in your heat intensely. He had promised you he'd be gentle, that he'd take his time with you, ease the aches he had rut into your body over this past few days and while Sylus is always a man of his word, it took everything he had to keep that promise when you looked so perfect beneath him. He could smell the sweet tang of you and it called to him, made him feel like he was home.
Sylus' tongue explored your soaked heat teasingly, gently, featherlight flickers across your aching bud in a cursive language you didn't comprehend. Jolts of raw desire and need coursed through your walls and deep into your abdomen with his deliberate attentions. You moan his name and arch your back and he presses his large hand flat on your belly, encouraging your coiling orgasm to build more intensely. He's setting such a slow and intense pace that time feels like it has slowed down for you both, you feel like he's been lapping at your folds for what must be an hour when he finally introduces his fingers to explore your needy pussy.
Dripping wet under his tongue, your swollen walls offer his long fingers no resistance, drawing him in with needy clenches as his skilled tongue coaxes sighs and moans from your lips and his fingers slide in and out of you. He feels the subtle tremors, the way your walls begin to firm around his fingers and he knows you're so close to unravelling on his tongue, if he just pushes you a little further...
Sylus' deep rumbling moan against your clit makes your nerves explode in pleasure and you buck against his mouth, crying out his name in shuddering shaky breaths as your orgasm cascades in rhythmic clenches of intense pleasure through your body, leaving your thighs trembling with aftershocks and your heart rate pounding like a war drum in your chest.
He pulls away from you and looks up at you, smug satisfaction written across his face as your orgasm drips from his lips and down his chin, glistening. He wipes his mouth on the back of his hand and sucks on it, savoring the taste of you and offers you his slicked fingers to suck on. You take them greedily, tongue lewdly slurping up your own juices and he watches with an intense stare of love for you, cheeks flushed red, eyes glistening and pupils blown out, feeling so accomplished that he caused you to come undone this way.
"I'm so lucky I'm the only one that gets to see you like this, Sweetie."
It comes out huskily, his emotions getting caught in his throat for a moment, manifesting your pleasure so important to him.
He withdraws his fingers from your mouth and leans over to kiss you passionately, lining his aching erection up against your sopping folds. "I'll take it slow, okay?" he promises again, sliding his tip through your slit to coat himself with your juices before easing the head in gently. Your whole body shivers underneath him and you shift your hips, lifting your legs up and wrapping them around his ribcage to grant his girth more access.
Just as he promised, Sylus takes his time, inch by inch slowly slipping into you until you're so full of him that you feel the ache of your tired walls starting to settle and get used to his significant size. You've never been more full, he's so big and his tip presses insistently up against your cervix in a way that's almost painful if he thrusts too hard. He begins to roll his hips down into you, building a soft but intense rhythm, hitting all your most sensitive spots so very deep inside.
He grinds into you, holding his weight just off you so that he's not suffocating you and you moan deeply as you look down between you to see his length plunging in and out of you, his hips keeping a steady pace. His eyes are closed and his mouth hangs open ever so slightly as he chases your shared pleasure. You cup his cheek and brush the pad of your thumb across his lip and he opens his eyes to gaze down at you, shimmering ruby eyes overwhelmed by blown out pupils.
Sylus moans against your lips as he feels you tensing "if you're close just let go, I'm right here with you my dove" and it's enough to send you keening into your second orgasm, your walls rippling and clenching down, meeting the resistance of his hard flesh. His pace doesn't relent as he strokes you through your pleasure, feeling yourself gushing onto the sheets as the lewd sounds of him slapping into your wetness echo in the room.
As his eyes lose focus and his hips start to hitch, you wrap your legs tighter around him, trapping him deep into you and you slide your arms up around his neck, pulling him down so his head is buried in the curve of your jaw. Your ear is full of his hot ragged breaths and his moans and you lean in, purring back in his ear.
"Gooooood boy....you're everything I want Sylus".
His head snaps backwards with a loud, gutteral moan and his eyes widen in shock for at your unexpected praise as he starts to seize inside you, orgasm flooding your walls in scalding bursts as he tries in vain to keep thrusting. Panting heavily, Sylus lowers his weight down onto your hips a little and props himself on his forearms, staring into your eyes, searching you for any discomfort, kissing your lips gently when he doesn't find it.
"That was a dirty trick Y/N," he laughs, kissing you again. "It was a dirty trick and I loved every second of it."
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breedbun · 2 days ago
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loid x male reader idk lol.. with homoerotic tensions between you and loid obviously because it's fun!
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details: male reader, spy x family, m!reader x loid, yor does not have romantic feelings for loid, anya is silently watching all ts unfold. this will NOT be canon. EXTREMELY homoerotic friendship. youre loid's informant, u replace franky xd
warnings: homo obv, amab reader, he/him pronouns, femboy reader (haha i love dresses), yuri thinks you're a girl and tries to pursue you after thinking loid cares for you.
sfw !! ; your "first" encounter with Yor and.. her eccentric brother. not my best work ^_^ NSFW (no plot) coming soon guys calm down
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"When the stars align, I'll see you again one day."
As tensions don't ease between Ostania and Westalis, Loid continues to do his part to ensure the large possibility of war breaking out between the East and the West does not shatter the fragile peace they have at the moment. While Loid may be the best of the best spies, you come in handy for him too, obviously. Living your life as (Y/N, L/N) is pretty simple. You live in the same apartment complex as Loid, you work at a cutesy bakery which you enjoy greatly, and you have a stable side job as an informant for Loid. So, even while you pursue your simplistic and carefree life, you're still doing your part to help keep Ostania and Westalis safe! How you get your information, was top secret, but you did have an ability for thieving and hacking.. and that came in handy.
Whilst Loid had initially asked you to pretend to be his wife for Anya's school interview, you were quite hesitant.. but still accepted! And really, you made.. a perfect wife. Seeing you all dressed up and talking like Loid's wife, and Anya's mother, it honestly woke something up in Loid. But alas, Loid had found a real mother for Anya, and to be honest, you joked about how this was definitely cheating. In an unrelated note, you were happy to provide Loid with information he needed.. as long as he had the dollars to pay for it, hehe.
When the day came for Loid to introduce you as a friend to his new pretend-wife, Yor, you agreed, even if you felt just a little bitter. Your only comfort was that it was just play pretend.
You stepped into your small walk-in wardrobe, examining the arrays of adorable dresses hung up within your shelves. You pick a relatively modest, ruffled one, with pink and red hues, unzipping the back of the dress. Undressing yourself, you step into your dress, and pull it up, zipping the back of your clothing up. Picking a pair of laced socks, and pretty shoes, you chose a pastry leftover in your fridge and packed it up into a paper bag. Once you got your irritatingly hard-to-wear shoes on, you finally left the house and locked your front door with a firm click.
Happily strolling down the hall of you and Loid's apartment complex, you reach the elevator and press the button to the floor above your home. As you arrive in front of Loid's door, you hear.. yelling. Of a man's voice, clearly not Loid's calm voice, because he'd never yell at his family this angrily, honestly. You debate whether or not you should even ring the doorbell at this point.. but your hand knocks on the door before you can come to a conclusion.
The yelling stops momentarily, and Loid opens the door. You offer him a quick smile, looking over his shoulder as you saw.. a strange black-haired man, Yor, and little Anya. Anya loved when you came over, too.
"Great timing, (Y/N). Come, come in," Loid ushers you in, an arm over your shoulders as he guides you to the dinner table.. where there was a strangely strong scent of wine. As you sit down, you glance over at Yor, offering her a warm smile. She smiled back, and it comforted you knowing that Yor was obviously a kindhearted woman. Loid picked a lovely girl to be his pretend-wife. Anyway, the strange black-haired man stares straight at you, squinting as his face seemed flush and his posture screamed of.. 'drunk.' For a moment, it was oddly silent. The only sound was Loid bringing away the plates, and cleaning the table, while Anya toyed with a cute plush llama. Yor held Anya in her arms, letting her sit on her lap, while Yuri.. kept staring.
"...Ah, um. You.. you alright, there?" You ask, taking a sip of the wine Loid had poured for you just a few minutes ago. Yuri stood up from the sofa, groggily approaching you, a hand on the table cloth as he breached your personal space carelessly. Loid placed a hand on Yuri's shoulder, raising an eyebrow as he noticed your discomfort, how you shrunk in your chair and how your nose scrunched ever so slightly. Simply, Loid guides Yuri to sit down in a chair beside you. "Yuri. Maybe you shouldn't go that close to my friend, yes?"
Yuri also raised an eyebrow. He crossed his arms, before struggling to stand up again, pushing his index finger against Loid's chest. "Loid Forger...! Are you... is this.. IS THIS YOUR SISTER?!" Yuri yelled, a snarky grin on his face as he glanced towards you, your face flushing ...out of second-hand embarrassment for this strange man named Yuri. He snickers, moving away from Loid as Yuri places two hands beside you, against the back of your chair, as he leaned in, trapping you against the backrest chair and him. "If you're going to steal m—MY sister, Forger, I will definitely.. steal YOURS!!"
Ah. He's on the floor now.
Loid had immediately pushed Yuri off, as Yor rushed to Yuri's side, seemingly embarrassed of her own brother, you'd assume.. from how similar they looked. Loid glared at Yuri for just a split second, which you caught onto immediately, still shocked as you leaned against the back of your chair. Loid's expression immediately shifts to one of faked apologetic empathy, kneeling down to help Yuri.. and being pushed away by him as well.
"You were invading (Y/N)'s space. I had no choice, but to pull you off. I just didn't expect you to lose your balance, Yuri."
You try your best to include yourself in this incident. You are the supposed 'victim' after all. So, you crouch down, helping Yuri up with Yor, giving him a small shy smile, praying that he doesn't take it in the wrong way. In doing so, he actually accepts your help.
"No, it's alright, Loid! It's fine. He's extremely intoxicated, it seems," you added, chuckling sympathetically (which is not real!) as Yuri stands up with you and Yor's help. You assume Yor is a strong woman, since.. clearly, Yuri doesn't feel as heavy as he looks.. he didn't feel as heavy as a grown man, at least. As such, Loid apologises to Yuri again, laughing as he tries to brush it off. Yuri starts to sound like an old man yelling at a cloud, but everyone tries to calm him down. It's not long before Yuri falls asleep on the couch. Yeah.. it'd be best to let him nap for now, probably?
With a tug of your arm, you look down to see precious Anya... seemingly starstruck by how you dressed.
"...Princess?"
And just before you can respond—
"Oh! Prince!"
Huh? How'd she know that? Not many children realize that you're.. well, a guy. Not with your pretty hair, soft face, and dresses.
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tom-foolery-incorporated · 2 days ago
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How did Shockwave train his human to take his big spike? I just read your Brainstorm x Reader fic (hot as FUCK I loved it) and it got me thinking about how it must've been frustrating at first for Shockwave trying to have sex with his human at his full size. I imagine he mass displaces or changes his spike? I wanna frag shockwave so bad but I also don't know how long I'd survive as a human fleshlight 😭
Could you maybe write something for that? Like Shockwave and his human being sexually frustrated and him accidentally edging himself trying to be gentle with his human? Maybe thighfucking or just the tip. Get creative please! I love your work and the most recent Shockwave x reader got me thinking 🙏💗
I’m sitting here kicking my feet and twirling my hair. Ty for liking my writing!!! It means a lot <3
Anyway…..
Shockwave x Reader, gender neutral AFAB, racially ambiguous, wet dreams, dirty talk, just the tip, reader gets used as a toy, thigh fucking
“Hnn! Shockwave!” Your cute moans echoed throughout your shared habsuite. Such soft flesh dimpled under Shockwave’s servo as he gripped your body.
“You’re doing so well,” Shockwave could hardly contain the steam moving through his vents, his entire frame covered in coolant.
Your juices pooled around the base of his spike. He was so proud of you for finally being able to take him to the base. The head of his spike making a delicious bump in your abdomen as your body tries to mold itself around him. He hoped he could carve your walls into the shape of his spike.
He pulled you up off of his spike, your legs curled up to your hips as you presented your stretched hole to your lover. Shockwave’s servo gripped around your waist tighter in a possessive hold. You gasped feeling him pull himself out to the tip of his spike before lowering you back down to the base with a wet squelch.
“Perfect,” Shockwave whispered. “My perfect pet.”
Shockwave pulled you off him once again before plunging his spike deep in you. He twisted his hips to tease the inside of your cunt with how his spike twitched and moved within you.
RECHARGE CYCLE COMPLETE
Shockwave’s optic blinked online. His processor worked overtime replaying his dream; it was so life like. He could feel your sleeping form curled up next to his helm. The nest of pillows and blankets you had made supporting your sleeping body atop Shockwave’s shoulder plating. He moved his optic down to look at his chasis before gazing at you from the side of his vision.
He knew it was physically impossible for you to take his spike to the base unless he looked into modding his frame. He would consider it but he still wanted to see just how much your body could take. Humans were surprisingly durable and Shockwave wanted to test just how durable your body could be when assaulted with pleasure.
You were so cute, so innocent, sleeping up against your big metal lover. Shockwave could almost forget the countless nights he’d had you stretched out over his digits or stuffed with as many toys as he could fit in you. Seeing how peaceful you were, no one would be any the wiser to how Shockwave had had you screaming his name and squirting by his doing. Shockwave pictures your sleeping face covered in his transfluids. He’d work his spike over you until you woke up to a pink surprise dripping all over you. He knows you’d be a good pet and clean him up. Your soft tongue licking at his spike trying to gobble up as much of his overload as you could.
What have you done to him? The Decepticons’ most feared scientist reduced to a simple pleasure bot for you.
Shockwave absentmindedly rubbed his helm against your sleeping body. What was just a small movement to him was enough of a nudging to wake you up. You groaned while grabbing onto Shockwave’s helm.
“Good morning,” Shockwave greeted raising a servo to stroke at your hair. “Did you have a restful recharge?”
You moved your hands to grab at Shockwave’s servo giving his hand a hug as you peppered kisses along his digit. “Mhm,” you said while rubbing your face against his servo. “Did you?”
Shockwave thought back to his dream. How wonderful it would be to have you spread wide on his spike. So tight he could barely move outside of shallow thrusts.
“I did indeed,” Shockwave replied.
“Have any dreams?” There was a knowing tone to your voice that made Shockwave’s finials twitch.
“I did dream,” Shockwave said curtly.
“Good dreams?”
“Yes.”
You climbed out of your blanket and pillow nest so you could stand on Shockwave’s chasis with your hands on either side of his optic. “Do you want to share with the class?” You teased.
“I believe ‘the class’ already has an idea as to what my dream entailed,” Shockwave ran his servo up your back.
“All I know is that you were venting pretty hard and praising me,” you ran one of your hands along the ridge of Shockwave’s optic.
“My apologies if I disturbed your recharge cycle,” Shockwave let his servo wander to your lower back where his entire hand encompassed your rear and upper thighs as well.
“It was hard not to wake you up,” you murmured with your lips brushing along the ridge of his optic. “I couldn’t help but touch myself hearing you so worked up.”
Shockwave let one of his digits slip between your legs and press up against your heat. “I’m offended you didn’t wake me to join you,” Shockwave teased pressing his finger up against your clothed arousal. You moaned grinding down on his digit. “You work so hard,” you purred pressing kisses along his optic screen. “I wanted you to get a full recharge.”
You slipped your hand down to grab Shockwave’s digit as you humped it. “My big strong scientist always working so hard.”
Shockwave’s engine rumbled at your praise. “Do you wish to know what my dream entailed?” Shockwave relaxed his servo letting you set the pace for how you humped his finger. “Please, Shockwave,” you moaned out.
“I had your human valve spread wide enough to take my spike to my pelvis,” Shockwave explained. “I used you like a spike sleeve.”
Your whole body shivered at the idea. “Mmm, I’d like that,” you murmured feeling a wet stain starting to form inside your underwear. “I want to be stretched out over your cock.”
Shockwave released his modesty plate letting his erect spike spring into the air. “I’m sure you would,” Shockwave said while moving his servo to tug at your pajama pants. “But I’d prefer to not have you injured.”
You whined frantically tugging at your pajama bottoms and underwear only to discard them somewhere to your right. Shockwave couldn’t help his amusement at how needy you had become. Your pubic hair glistening with your slick arousal.
“Your frustration is mutual,” Shockwave held onto your body as he sat up. Your nest falling apart and falling to the berth below.
You looked over your shoulder trying not to drool at how Shockwave’s spike bounced with his movement. “I need you inside me,” you whined as your hand dipped between your folds. Your clit was stiff in arousal as you rubbed it.
“Don’t begin to think that I’m not as desperate to penetrate you,” Shockwave’s chasis rumbled as he spoke. “Your body is very tempting.”
You whined as you leaned back against Shockwave’s servo with your legs spread so he could see how your fingers moved through your slick cunt.
The musk of your pussy hit his olfactory sensors causing a flush of steam to release from his vents. “I would like to propose an idea that may be mutually beneficial.”
“This is exactly where you belong,” Shockwave’s voice sounded desperate as he pulled you along his spike. Your pussy flush against the metal as your legs dangled uselessly. He had his servo wrapped around your torso with your arms pinned to your sides. While you had already cum, your pussy twitching sensitively as Shockwave took what he wanted from you, Shockwave hadn’t.
Your hole fluttered emptily still not satisfied without Shockwave inside of you. “Please!” You begged throwing your head back. You stared up at the underside of Shockwave’s chasis with your eyes half lidded. “Please I can take it! Just fuck me!”
Shockwave growled at your pleading fighting an internal fight with his own desperation and logic. He wanted so desperately to shove his spike as deep as it could go inside of you. He wants to see just how much you can take before you break. Yet every time his logic wins.
Shockwave continues grinding your cunt along his spike leaving a slick trail of your arousal along the metal shaft. His biolights pulsed in agitation so desperate to cum yet not having enough stimulation. “We can attempt penetration today,” Shockwave concluded. He had been training your hole fairly well or so says the display of increasingly large dildos on his shelf he had made for you.
You almost cried out in relief as Shockwave pulled your slick core from his shaft. A string of wet arousal broke as he lifted you away from his spike.
Using his canon arm, he held you against his abdomen as his servo dipped between your legs. Shockwave dipped in two of his digits making you moan out his name. You beautifully took both of his fingers into your greedy hole with a squelch. Shockwave’s spike twitched at the noise. You ran your hands along his canon gripping onto whatever points you could find as he stretched your hole and fucked his fingers into you.
“I would like to set expectations,” Shockwave said while adding another digit into you. “You will not be able to take me to my base. However I will consider any form of penetration a win on our part.”
Shockwave spread his digits making you hiss in both pain and pleasure. Your poor hole was stretched to its limit and yet seemed to still beg for more. He pulled his digits out of your hole slowly so you could feel every inch of his metal fingers. They exited your wet pussy with a slorping noise making you wince in embarrassment and Shockwave’s engine rumble in pleasure.
“You are exceptionally wet,” Shockwave showed you how your slick clung to his fingers like clear slime. “I believe this is as exciting for you as it is for me.” You grabbed Shockwave’s servo guiding his metal hand to your mouth so you could lick your arousal off his fingers. “Good, pet,” Shockwave tilted his optic so he could better see you over his chasis. Pride thrummed within his spark seeing you so well trained as to clean his servo without him asking. Your soft lips sucking along his digits as your tongue peeked out to lick up and around his fingers cleaning your slick off of him.
“Are you ready?” Shockwave dragged the back of his knuckle over your cheek tenderly. You could hardly contain yourself as you spread your legs as wide as they could go. “Please, Shockwave!” You begged holding your folds open with your fingers. “I just want you inside me!”
Shockwave groaned leaking transfluid down his painfully erect spike. He grabbed around your waist teasingly dragging your cunt along his shaft once more before turning you around in his servo so you were facing him. The tip of his spike pulsed against your cunt smearing pink transfluid around your folds. You eagerly reached down to rub at his spike in worship earning a thrust against your pussy.
“If we are unable to initiate penetration, do not feel you are inadequate my pet,” Shockwave assured you. You nodded holding your pussy open in excitement. The tip of his spike kissed at your pulsing hole. He pushed forward gently trying to stuff you full but only ended up gliding his cock through your sopping vulva. “Shockwave,” you whined arching your hips at a better angle. “Behave,” Shockwave tided as he attempted to push into you once more. The very end of his spike hooked onto your hole making you moan out in absolute bliss.
Shockwave’s optic remained trained on the barely an inch of his spike he managed to push into you. He pressed further watching how your face contorted in a mixture of pain and pleasure. Your hole struggled around his girth spasming as your own juices bubbled around his cock.
“Well done,” Shockwave could hardly contain his own moan at the sight. Half of his tip was inside of your tight little hole. Your breathing was frantic as you squirmed in his hold. Your temperature was scorching causing your body to dampen with sweat. “It’s so good!” You moaned out humping the head of his spike. Shockwave’s vents fluttered in bliss as his optic glitched.
“Are you capable of taking more?” Shockwave’s venting was becoming heavy. You were finally here, stretched wide enough to take his spike without any mass displacement or mods. “Please! Please!” You begged your words stringing together in an alphabet soup of praise. “Do not push yourself past your limits,” Shockwave warned before pushing the rest of his cock’s head inside of you.
You felt something inside of you snap as you came from the sensation of being so stretched out alone. Shockwave groaned feeling your walls tighten around him like you were trying to push his massive cock out. He kept your body steady holding his tip firmly in place inside of you. “You are doing wonderfully, pet,” Shockwave moaned giving you an experimental thrust.
You screamed out his name feeling your limbs turn to gelatin from the stimulation. He gave another gentle buck of his hips wanting to hear more of your blissed out noises. Tears strewed down your face as you stared up at Shockwave in disbelief. You had never felt this full your entire life. You were sure he was going to break you and by god did that sound delightful. You hoped Shockwave broke you mind and body only for you to become a sloppy wet toy for him to fuck.
“You take spike exceedingly well,” Shockwave purred pulling you off of the tip of his cock before lowering you once again. You moaned stupidly your brain only able to process the feeling of having your hole so thoroughly stretched beyond its limits. “I am excited to share this information with Soundwave as well.” You became increasingly wetter at the mention of the other bot Shockwave enjoyed sharing you with. “He has requested updates on your training,” Shockwave said satisfied with your fucked out form. “I believe he would enjoy a turn once I am finished.”
You could only nod and drool as Shockwave used your hole as his own personal spike sleeve. Your juices leaking down his spike with a mixture of his transfluids. He could feel his valve clenching in delight at finally feeling that pit within his abdomen that told him he was close. “What is that phrase you use in your human pornography?” Shockwave groaned. “Cumdump?” He pushed forward forcing you to take more of his spike as he released deep within your core. You cried as a spray of squirt erupted from your pussy then dribbled into a pathetic stream. Shockwave kept the head of his spike buried inside of you as he released his overload into your welcoming body. Pink transfluid leaked around his spike dripping out of your fucked out hole and onto his lap.
You sobbed feeling his warm transfluid so deep within you. You rubbed over your abdomen where you felt your womb was. “Beautiful,” Shockwave praised slowly pulling his spike out of you. “You performed far past my expectations.” You shoved your fingers into your stretched hole trying to plug up your cunt to keep any transfluid from leaking out of you. “I see you know your place,” Shockwave lifted you up to his optic as he watched you finger fuck his overload back inside of yourself sloppily. “I will prepare you a bath and a heating pad for your groin. You did very well today, my pet.”
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rainbowcrystal35 · 14 hours ago
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this got me thinking about a Wu x Ras AU so here’s my word vomit about it ( sorry if it doesn’t make sense it isn’t in any order) ( I might add to this future but knowing me I I’m probably not going to )
I’m going to call this AU Ras’s bride AU
Wu has amnesia like Jay but instead of Wu at the administration and having Ras saving Wu like Jay
Wu is there with Ras from the beginning (and what if they also married)
Wu is there with Ras all the time write beside Ras or on his shoulder ( Wu just sitting on Ras’s shoulder like it’s completely normal And Ras carrying Wu like he weighs nothing at all )
Wu’s wearing a outfit that covers everything so nobody can tell who he is and Wu wears it by his own will ( Ras doesn’t care what Wu wears if Wu wants to wear it )
And Wu doesn’t speak to anyone but Ras and Jay , Cinder , jordana so the ninjas or Ras allies have never heard Wu speak when Wu speaks to Ras in front of people Wu whispers in Ras’s ear
When the forbidden five tries to turn on Ras Wu tells his love what the forbidden five or trying to do
Also because of the inherent trust Wu has for the ninjas( explanations about the inherent trust is in “ More about Wu’s amnesia” ) Ras pacifically went after Jay to make Jay into his student before the ninjas got to Jay first
when Ras brought back Jay to Wu everything was normal but after a few days later Ras realized Jay became their son
Ras is confused how he and Wu has 3 children now but isn’t opposed to it so he just goes along with it ( Wu can adopt faster then Ras can realize ) (Wu and Ras Children: Cinder , Jordana , Jay)
Wu is will absolutely destroy the one who possessed Jordana when Wu gets he’s hands on her
When jay loses to Nya in the Tournament of the Sources he doesn’t leave it instead Jay goes to Wu and Ras and apologizes for losing to one of their enemies and before Ras can yell at Jay for losing Jay gets scooping into Wu,s lap ( Wu does the same to Cinder to when he loses to Sora ) when Wu does that Ras just looks at Wu and gets glared at by Wu and Ras just sight at that and went back to watching the tournament
Cinder and Jay doesn’t get corrupted by Rox ( The one who possessed Jordana) like the Wolf Mask Warriors because their right next to Ras or Wu
More about Wu’s amnesia
Wu doesn’t remember anything even his own name and when he woke up he looked very different because before the amnesia he used to change his appearance (by using his oni shapeshifting )to look much older and wiser and to also hide his many many scars (Ras and Wu doesn’t know his master Wu)
Wu wears a outfit that covers everything because he doesn’t like all his many scars because it reminds him that he doesn’t know who he is or how he got his scars 
and when Wu fights the ninjas he tries to not hurt them as little as possible because something in him tells him to trust the ninjas but the ninjas are his husband’s enemy so Wu’s very conflicted and confused about the ninjas ( Ras knows this and doesn’t try to discourage Wu to learn as much as possible about the ninjas allies and the ninjas themselves Ras is also trying to help Wu to figure out his true identity before the merge to so Ras sometimes try's to provoke the ninjas into telling information that can help his lovers research )
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DR S2 but...
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jjkarmy091 · 3 days ago
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Second Best- Jungkook (part 6)
Summary: Being friends with someone who has your heart it’s already hard, let alone when that special someone ends up falling in love with your best friend, the one you think would never make anything to hurt you . Will you be able to ignore it and move on? what will happen when everything gets too much for you to handle?
Genre: Friends to lovers; angst; body insecurities; bullying; friend betrayel;
Pairing: Jungkook x female!reader
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Jungkook woke up around 9:30 am. The first thing he did was check his phone in case he had any notifications from Y/n, but had none. He was seriously getting worried about this lack of response. Had something happened with the person Y/n left with? If that was the case he would never be able to forgive himself. He knew he should have gone after her, he's so stupid. 
He got up, took a quick shower, got dressed, grabbed his keys and left, he couldn’t keep up with this uneasy feeling. Putting his helmet on, he drove to the coffee shop Y/n worked. He knew her shifts very well, and that was the only place he could find her. When he got there, he parked his bike, took a deep breath and got in looking everywhere for her but still no Y/n in sight. 
“Hey there moto boy. What can I get you?” Sana asked. Jungkook looked kinda confused. “I was actually looking for Y/n. Is she on her break?” Sana frowned and looked at him suspiciously. 
“You’re kidding right?” Sana exclamed. “You are always together and talk to each otherall the time when you aren’t. You can’t tell me you didn’t know she took some days off” 
The world fell at Jungkook's feet upon hearing that. Y/n took a few days off and didn't even answered to his texts or deign to call? what the fuck was going on. Jungkook nodded his head, said thank you and left, picking his phone up instantly to call Y/n. “The person you called is not available. Please try again later” 
Fuck. Me
------------ 
Y/n fell in love with that place as soon as she saw it. Everywhere she looked she she felt immense peace and everything seemed so quiet and cozy, everything to make the weight on her shoulders disappear. Upon entering the chalet, they were immediately greeted by a gentleman at the entrance who directed them to the reception.
After checking in and receive the keys, they picked up their luggage and followed the gentlemanto the elevator, who was showing them the way to their "apartment”. Y/n couldn’t believe what her eyes were seeing. Walking in, she’s faced with a very nice living room, with wooden walls and gray furniture. It had shelves with books, among other really cute stuff decorating the place. All very neutral and very light, exactly what she needed. On the coffee table was champagne and a plate with strawberries and chocolate with a small note saying "we hope you enjoy your stay as much as we enjoy your presence. Thanks for choosing us. Have fun" 
From the living room they went to the bedroom to organize their things. When they walked in Y/n was even more astonished. From their bed they had a view of the outside. She always loved snow and being there was filling her heart with so much happiness she wished she could live there forever.
“Where did you find this place and how can you afford it for both of us?!” Y/n exclaimed. Lisa looked at her with a funny look “My dad owns it. A benefit of traveling so much and not seeing his family for so long, not everything can be bad. I used to come here for Christmast and New year. It's crazy during those days and you know me, I love crazy and those were my favourite moments here”
Y/n laughed. Only Lisa could say something like that. 
“So… You know how to ski right?” Lisa asked out of nowhere. “Oh hell no Lisa, no way, not right now, we just got here we should—” Y/n argued back but was soon interrupted by Lisa 
“There's a snow suit in the closet on the right. We have a lot to discover we won't wait until tomorrow. You rest during the night. Come on princess, time is money” Y/n huffed while getting her suit to start putting it on.  How could Lisa have so much energy was something she couldn't understand.
They both got dressed and head out of the chalet. Y/n was amazed by the view, everything was perfect. But it’s not an adventure if something doesn't go right for Y/n. Out of nowhere she lost sight of Lisa, making her panick. She had no idea where she was.
Y/n looked around trying to see her friend but couldn’t identify anyone who would look like her. She started walking around worried about straying too far from where Lisa last saw her. Y/n was so distracted that she didn't even notice anyone coming close to her, ending up colliding with that person, causing her to lose balance and fall. The other person quickly knelt down, stretching out his hand to help her until she heard “Y/n?” 
She looked up, took the stranger's hand and straightened her hair a little, trying to understand where she recognized that voice from, until the stranger took the protective mask off his eyes and saw him.
“Taehyung?”  
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Tags: @esposadomd @joonlover1207 @eegyo @furrywonderlandwolf @minghaosimp @differentrunawayperson @nikkinikj @jksusawife @11thenightwemet11 @jk97bam @11thenightwemet11 @cryingoverpixelsetc @bhonbhon @lostinneocity @almostpurplelady @meowforluv
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seeker-ophelia · 2 days ago
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Mythal, Solas, and Lavellan
So there’s lots of discussion about Mythal and Solas, and we need to talk about it.
I too, at first, was mad that Lavellan wasn’t enough for Solas.
And then I started thinking about it.
Not only was Mythal his mother, his creator, she coaxed him into being. Into changing his spirit and his purpose.
Regret Number 1.
He let her use his knowledge and wisdom to do a terrible thing, to kill (tranquil) the titans, changing a whole race of people at a molecular magical level.
Regret Number 2.
When that choice created the worst power known to Thedas (the blight) he was responsible again. And Mythal asked him to step up and fight against it, and he did. And a lot of people died.
Regret 3.
Mythal DIED. (IMO The gods blighted her because she stood against them for wanting to use the blight but that’s not important here). And Solas blames himself.
From Solas’ perspective, he is her puppy. Her Emerald Knight. Her General. Her Protector. Her Wisdom. Her servant, her SLAVE. He is BOUND TO HER. And he caused her downfall.
And you’re all like, GEAS! GEAS!
But wait.
From HIS perspective.
Rook says something somewhere along the lines of like, by abstainsing from being the good guy (oh wait maybe it was Varric in the fade…)
By choosing to be the villain instead of the hero is he absolving himself of the guilt (regret) that comes from having to have made those choices.
From Solas’ perspective, he is her slave.
LOOK AT HIS BODY LANGUAGE.
He is a worm in the dirt in front of her. He is a scolded child, a puppy with his tail between his legs.
But in the eyes of Mythal, he was always her friend. The one person who had always stood by her. She did not literally entrap him, or bind him. It was all in Solas’ own head.
He refused to take accountability for his actions, only able to survive through the crushing weight of his own guilt by blaming it on servitude to Mythal.
That’s why Rook escaped the prison. Because she faced her own choices, choices with terrible consequences, and accepted them. Took responsibility for them, and promised to do better.
Remember, after the Temple of Mythal…
Solas…
You gave yourself into the service of an ancient elvhen god!
What does that mean exactly?
You are Mythal’s creature now, everything you do whether you know it or not will be for her. *** You have given up a part of yourself.
***THIS WAS NEVER TRUE. IT WAS NOT TRUE FOR FLEMYTHAL & MORRIGAN, NOR WAS IT TRUE FOR ABELAS, NOR WAS IT TRUE FOR SOLAS. HE JUST WANTED TO BELIVE THAT IT WAS.
…I suppose it is better you have the power than Corypheus. Which leads to the next logical question… What will you do with the power of the Well once Corypheus is dead?
The war proved that we can’t go back to the way things were. I’ll try to help this world move forward. **Lavellan is talking about the mage/templar conflict, but Solas is putting her in his own shoes. Solas reached for power he could not control and fucked the whole world up.
You would risk everything you have with the hope that the future is better? What if it isn’t? What if you wake up to find that the future you shaped is worse than what was? **
**This is literally him asking her what she would do in his shoes. He woke up and the world was in chaos OF HIS MAKING. To prevent an evil HE CAUSED from spreading, he orchestrated the downfall of the people he loved and swore to protect.
I’ll take a breath, see where things went wrong, and then try again.
Just like that?
*He is in shock that she can be so cavalier about the guilt that has rocked him for (4?) millennia.
If we don’t keep trying, we’ll never get it right.
*And this is the only thing that calms him down.
You’re right. Thank You.
For what?
You have not been what I expected, Inquisitor, you have… impressed me.
You have offered hope that is one keeps trying, even if the consequences are grave… that someday, things will be better.
Then, of course, he takes this to mean that he needs to try to put The Evanuris in a different prison and take down the veil which isn’t at all what we meant sweetie but that’s okay get up and try again.
This is a classic case of a person in power not understanding the terrible, horrible consequences of unfettered power imbalances. Because Solas was always Friend to Mythal (Im not going into Freudian sex shit with you weirdos right now).
Solas was Mythals FRIEND.
Mythal was Solas’ EVERYTHING.
co·de·pend·en·cy
/ˌkōdəˈpend(ə)nsē/
noun
excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner,
His Mother, General, Creator, Protector, Queen, Goddess.
And he loved her so fiercely with every fiber of his new, physical being.
And he hated it.
And when Lavellan fell for him, and he for her, he was afraid.
Because he would never force a spirit against her purpose, and in his eyes the only way to love is the sick and twisted way he loved Mythal.
But again, from Mythal’s perspective, it wasn’t twisted. Solas was just Solas. And once again the powerful care not for the thoughts and opinions of those beneath them.
And that sin is on Mythal.
And that’s why she comes out and talks to Solas. Both aspects of her. To release him from the bonds that never existed. Be free, friend. You always were, but if you need me to say it I will because I love you.
“I pulled you from the fade and sent you into war. I used your wisdom as a weapon… and it broke you.”
Cole: Is there a way to save more spirits, Solas?
Solas: Not until the Veil is healed. The rifts draw spirits through, and the shock makes demons of them.
Cole: Pushing through makes you be yourself. You can hold onto the you. Being pulled through means you don't have enough you. You become what batters you, bruises your being.
Be free.
“The things that I have done…”
“Are not for you to bear alone, my friend. The many wrongs we did, we did together.”
And he COWERS before her. Shaking and shuddering. FNALLY being absolved of the guilt he’s carried since his inception.
“I release you from my service.”
And he SOBBS. At the RELIEF.
And Lavellan kneels before him (wrong, IMO because they should be equals but its fine)
And he can go back to his original purpose.
Not Pride.
Not Knowledge.
Not even Wisdom.
But Protection.   
“My life force now sustains the veil. With every breath I take, I will protect the innocent from my past failures.”
The Shepherds Wolf. Protecting his flock from those who would do them harm.
And Lavellan promises it won’t be terrible, as long as they’re together.
And maybe Solas can try this different kind of love. A love built on respect, and trust, instead of fear, and obedience.
And he can be his purpose, Protection, and also be a man. And love his vhenan.
Because he is free.
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wordsofelie · 2 days ago
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🏠one goodbye, a million hellos
A Phoenix and Ashes & Don’t you dare run away short story (can be read as a standalone)
Suna x f!reader
Summary: Suna is invited to the wedding of his ex. he goes there with a broken heart and leaves with a loving one.
Content warnings: alcohol consumption, non-explicit bed scene, swearings, timeskip, manga spoilers
Words count: 3.5k
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Suna knew from the moment he woke up that morning, that today was going to be shitty day. First, his alarm didn’t go off—luckily, his lazy cat decided to scratch at the door, waking him up. Bleary-eyed, he noted that the noise outside was way too loud for it to be 6 a.m. That’s when he checked the time. It was 8 a.m.
He launched out of bed and stumbled as his ankle twisted slightly. He barely registered the discomfort because he simply had no time to waste. Then he checked the weather on his phone: a sunny day ahead, or so he thought. However, all he had to do was cross the threshold to realise that he’d checked the forecast for Hiroshima, not Tokyo, and that it was pouring rain in the bigger city.
The way to the gym didn’t help ease his mood. He had to wait for two overcrowded trains to pass before he could squeeze onto the third, only to watch in horror as his wallet tumbled out of his bag and skidded across the station floor. Two teenagers shot him a pitying look and smirked.
His coach made him run ten extra laps of the court as a punishment.
Anyway, it was shaping up to be the shittiest day.
Only two things can possibly redeem it now, Suna hopes: the company of his chubby, grey cat and the arrival of his long-awaited new volleyball shoes.
When he finally reaches his apartment building, he rushes to the mailbox.
Fuck, the shoes aren’t there.
He sighs heavily and sorts through the stack of mostly junk mail. There’s an ad for the new yakiniku restaurant that opened in his neighbour, a fan’s letter (how did they find his address?) and then, at the bottom of the mailbox, a delicate, white envelope with his name inked in familiar handwriting. Suddenly, his chest tightens. Suna feels his lungs closing, as if they can no longer inhale the breath from outside. Because, even if he wishes he could unrecall the way his ex-girlfriend used to write his name, he can’t; and the letter is from her. He doesn’t need to open the letter to know what it is. She wouldn’t use such elegant paper for him—not anymore. So, he knows, even before reading a single word, that it is an invitation to her wedding.
Her wedding to Miya Osamu.
But just in case his hunch was wrong, in case she dumped his former teammate and wants Suna back in her life, he decides to unfold the paper, carefully.
Honda Airi & Miya Osamu are pleased to invite you...
That’s enough for today.
He shoves the letter into his bag, in a harsh move. Yet somehow, he can’t bring himself to crumple or shred it to pieces for it is certainly very precious to Airi.
When he enters his apartment, he mumbles a shy “tadaima”, it’s unusual for him. He never much cared for the ritual of announcing his return, but his mother used to insist on it, so he only does it with her and his younger sister when he visits them. And Airi once complained when he didn’t. He never knew why it mattered so much to her.
“It’s just… I love having someone to say ‘okaeri’ to,” she said.
Only now does Suna understand the warmth of having someone to greet when coming home, or rather, Suna understands the coldness of having no one to go home to. Not even Peko-chan, his cat, bothers to look up at him, it doesn’t seem like that ungrateful bastard is going to come and ask for cuddles anytime soon.
He finds a single lollipop on the kitchen counter and unwraps it, it’s sweet but somehow tonight, it tastes bitter.
The letter stays in his bag for weeks. Airi tries to call him a few times, leaving messages of “hey, I was wondering if you had received a letter?”, and “tell me when you have received the invitation… I’d like to talk with you about it.” Which turned into “everyone received theirs so I don’t know if you moved out or if you’re ignoring me… anyway, please call me back.”
She sounds so worried; it makes him feel bad and so, he calls her back.
Airi seems to be thrilled when she talks about the wedding plans. There’s this spark in her voice that reminds him of everything he once loved about her. For a brief moment, he almost forgets it is supposed to hurt.
She begs him to come because “you’ve always meant a lot to me, and… I still think of you as a close friend. And Osamu’s entire team from high school is coming. It wouldn’t feel right without you there. But I understand if it makes you feel uncomfortable-”
“I’ll come.” He simply replies. Suna has always been a man of few words. He believes he hears a sigh of relief in her voice.
She thanks him one, twice, thrice, Suna pretends it is a pleasure. Which it is (because he made her happy) but also isn’t (because all the regrets he pushed aside for years suddenly resurface).
That evening, he reads the whole invitation. It is so quintessentially her—simple and graceful, the venue will be in the mountains, of course she loves the mountains. The wedding will be held in summer, near her birthday. Every detail seems to fit her perfectly, even the name next to hers, and despite the hurt and regrets, Suna Rintarou has to admit that Miya Osamu is a way better choice than himself for her; he had always been.
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The day comes and Suna feels his stomach hurt when he arrives at the venue. It’s a small gathering, which only makes him more visible when he parks. He glances at the people that are already there, and takes a deep inspiration—yet, even in the calm, he can feel his pulse race. A few seconds after, he hears Atsumu tapping on his window.
“Sunarin, my man!” Atsumu’s grin is wide as ever, and Suna’s response is his usual faint smile.
Atsumu explains everything to him from what’s planned for dinner to where the restrooms are but soon after that, excuses himself to go see his brother who’s almost done getting ready.
To stay close to people who are calm and won’t ask too many questions, Suna makes his way to his senpai, Aran and Kita, and nods through conversations, pretending to be his normal self, quiet and unbothered.
Suna doesn’t remember a lot about what happened after, maybe because he was to focus on trying to make the pain in his chest go away.
But when Airi arrives, he finds her beautiful, but he also admits to himself that his heart doesn’t beat the way it used to. The man realises that it is not her that haunts him, but the regrets and the “what could have been?”. It’s the longing to have someone by his side to cherish. It’s the fact that the only true love story he had experienced ended in tears—because of him—and when he tried to fix the broken glasses, it was too late.
This goodbye will forever hurt.
By the reception, Suna attempts to control his drinking—partly because he is a professional athlete, but mostly because he fears he might say something stupid to Airi, “Could it have been us?”, he nearly asks when he bumps into her at the buffet. But instead, “I’m happy for you,” comes out.
“Thank you, Rin. It means a lot coming from you.” the hurt eases even slightly.
Still the alcohol starts blurring his mind a little bit and he turns, only to find himself spilling his drink on someone.
“Shit,” that someone says.
“Oh-sorry!” he mutters, reaching for a napkin to help.
She says nothing back, and doesn’t even look at him at first, not out of annoyance, Suna concludes, but because her attention is glued to her camera, which took the brunt of the spill (and that thing seems the hell expensive).
After a minute or so, she sighs heavily and mumbles a “thanks gods, it’s still working.” As she raises the camera, she snaps one picture of Suna.
The man raises an eyebrow, genuinely taken aback.
“I need to remember the man who almost made me lose my job.”
She grins. And Suna can finally see her whole face. She’s more radiant than a thousand suns.
“Your job?”
“Yep. Honda-san, I mean, Miya-san now, hired me to be the photograph for tonight. My shop is close to her workplace.” She says, brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear as she extends her hand to introduce herself.
“Mmh, nice to meet you. I’m Suna.”
He’s cold. Suna knows he is, but it’s not like he can do anything about it, that’s just who he has always been. Somehow, she doesn’t seem impressed or upset by it. She simply scratches her chin and frowns.
“Are you here for the bride or the groom… Wait, let me guess. You’re pretty tall and handsome. Volleyball player, right? So, the groom’s side, I’d say.”
Suna doesn’t know how to respond to that because after all, he’s here for both.
“Actually…” He hesitates. “I was in high school with them.”
“Oh, I’m sure you were the mysterious type and cool guy all the girls had a crush on?”
Suna laughs, a short huff through his nose. “I don’t know. Were you the stalking girl who took pictures of her crush?”
“Do you really want to know?”
“Did you take many pictures of me tonight?” He wheedles and crosses his arms.
“Who said I had a crush on you?”
That girl is probably smarter than he would ever be, Suna concludes and just when he’s thinking about what he can argue back, she chimes in.
“But, if you want to know, you’ll have to stop by my shop sometime.”
He’s surprised when his heart skips a beat and finds himself wanting to know more about her. They chat naturally for the next half an hour, like old friends or something close to it. She mentions Momo, her cat, a clingy, high-maintenance furball that couldn’t be more different from his laid-back pet. He shows her a photo of said pet, and she laughs about how nonchalant he looks (“like his owner” she adds). She still thinks the felines would look good together. Suna wonders if they would.
“Well, I just forgot I’m supposed to be working and I saw that dude who looks like an owl doing a backflip on the dancefloor. I think Miya-san wouldn’t want me to miss this.” She leans just an inch so that Suna is close enough now to inhale a fragment of her scent. “Guess I’ll see you around… Mister Cool Guy.”
Before he can say anything, she slips back into the crowd. Suna thinks he catches a slight blush on her ears, he smiles, and it makes his cheeks hurt.
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Two weeks after, Airi calls him.
“Rin, I hate to ask, but I’m in Osaka right now, and the wedding photos are ready. Could you pick them up?”
Suna wonders if she has some sixth sense or if fate is intervening, but either way, he decides to take the chance.
When he arrives at the shop, she’s there, and the man swears he caught her smile widen when she saw him. She’s helping a young girl with some identity photos, telling her jokes, and making funny faces to get a smile from the child. The way she acts with her makes him think that she has that ability of making everyone feel at ease.
“Here for the photos?” she asks and hands him the envelope.
He takes it, but something holds him back from leaving just yet. He’s here to do his ex a favour, but as he heads toward the door, he finds himself turning around.
“What are you doing after this?”
“Nothing,” she answers, almost too quickly.
The middle blocker holds back a teethfull smile, “There’s a new yakiniku place nearby. I’ve been wanting to try it.”
“I close in twenty minutes.” She informs.
“I’ll wait,” he replies, and finally lets a rare smile break through.
The dinner’s great, they talk about everything and nothing at all. He grills the meat, she eats it while telling him about her degrees and her previous experiences working in a rigid company, why she hated it and how her boss was a butthead. Suna notes that her eyes shine when she explains how she finally followed her dreams and became a professional photographer. She asks him about his dream, impressed when she searches for his name on the internet and sees the number of followers on his public profile.
By the time they’re walking back, neither is in a rush to leave the other. Their feet drag slightly, as if it would help delay the moment they part ways.
“Next time, I’ll try the karubi,” she exclaims, nudging him.
“Next time?”
“What? Aren’t you going to take me on another date, Suna Rintarou?” She smirks, bright and clear.
Everything inside him moves and his heart aches. But this time, the feeling soothes him.
And so, he agrees to go out with her again. The dates become regular and slowly, as the days pass, fingers intertwine, soft kisses land at the corner of lips, and “i like you” are whispered under the moon.
With her, it’s never awkward, never forced. And Suna thinks that maybe he isn’t cursed to be loveless after all.
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A few months later, when her apartment lease ends, they move in together. Suna, with his ever-pragmatic mind, decides they know each other well enough to make it work. She’s clumsy, messy, and can sleep till noon—he often returns from his morning run to find her still in bed, though now she tries to get up and wait for him with two steaming cups of tea. She has a tendency to comment on absurd reality shows about people fighting in a villa, and while he doesn’t admit it aloud, Suna finds an odd comfort in her quirks.
At first, her cooking is questionable, bad even, but he finds her watching YouTube tutorials on “How To Meal Prep for Athletes.” Soon, her omurice (that was a bit too burnt in the beginning), packed with olive oil for good fats, protein-rich chicken and eggs, rice for carbs, and fiber-loaded courgettes and red peppers, becomes something he actually looks forward to. Her repertoire of healthy recipes grows, and they fall into a rhythm that makes Suna feels nothing less than at home: he handles the cleaning, and she deftly manages bills and taxes.
On the weekends, they play video games and go on hikes—though never too long ones, because she stops constantly to capture everything. “You already took a picture of that flower,” he points out, and with her innocent smile, she replies, “But the light’s different now.”
She respects his boundaries, never pressures him to do things he dislikes, and doesn’t complain when his responses are short and of few words. She doesn’t make him feel bad when his training runs late. No matter what hour he comes home, she’s waiting—half asleep on the couch, two cats curled in her lap, an almost-empty packet of low-salt and 0% fat crisps by her side. He kneels before her, murmuring “tadaima,” and her eyes squint and then shine as she responds, “okaeri, my love.”
She never misses his games, always making sure to snap the best shots of him. Sometimes, she even sneaks alongside the official photographers, scolding them for not taking enough pictures of Suna.
“What a bunch of idiots…Can’t you see he’s the ace of the game?” (it got her to be kick out of the gym once).
She learns all the rules from volleyball even though she still gets confused with the rotations. One day, from where he stands on the court, Suna hears her protest when the referee whistles for a foul he made (even though it was obvious he touched the net with his chest).
In return, Suna never fails to attend her exhibitions. He strokes her hair and kisses her cheeks when she cries because “no one came” and “I’m a failure.”
He lists every reason why she’s mistaken and how she’s the most talented person in this entire universe. It makes her cry even more, but with happy tears this time. He keeps on believing that her art will be celebrated worldwide someday, but that he’ll remain the first to stand in line when queues of fans will show up to see her masterpieces.
After a hard day, he runs her a bath, (always putting a little bath bomb that smells like roses, her favourite). When he’s away for matches, he brings back mugs from every country. The shelves are now overflowing, and they had to buy a new cabinet, but she still asks him for more.
He discovers what makes her feel good, the spots on her skin that sends shivers down her spine (her upper thigh, the back of her shoulders). He learns what words make her lose her mind, what pace she enjoys most.
When he messes up, she’s never afraid to call him out. “You’re a piece of shit,” she shouts sometimes when she’s pissed at him, and they burst into laughter because they can never be mad at each other for more than fifteen minutes.
During the Paris Olympics, they explore the city for what she calls their “honeymoon” (they’re not married, not even engaged, though Suna wouldn’t mind giving her his last name, or taking hers). She photographs every single croissant they try, and even makes him pose like he’s holding up the Eiffel Tower, much to his dismay. The man grunts but does it anyway (it’s a total fail).
She jumps in his arms when Japan wins against Argentina. He almost stumbles, but happiness overwhelms him at the same time.
He meets Airi’s gaze, who came with Osamu and his parents to cheer for Atsumu. She beams at him, and he smiles back.
(After all, going to that wedding wasn’t quite a bad idea.)
And just like that, a year transforms into two and into three. His career is stable while hers flourishes.
When he turns 30, she shows him a video montage that leaves him flustered. He laughs at her for getting teary-eyed even though she’s the one who made it.
“Where did you get all these pictures of me as a kid?” he grumbles, embarrassed.
“From your mum, of course! She was happy to help.”
“To help humiliate me?” he asks, and she tries to shut him up with a quick, “I love you.” He rolls his eyes but smiles anyway.
For her birthday, he gifts her the camera she’s been dreaming of her entire life. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. Please, keep taking pictures. I love them... and I love you,” he tells. She answers she could die happy.
Her first picture with the new device is, shamelessly, Suna’s “beautiful and too-hot-for-public-decency back muscles.”
“Are you taking nudes of me, darling?” He raises an eyebrow when he catches her in the act.
“But this is my favourite scenery.” She tries to explain with a pout. He lets her snap more pictures.
She heads to New York for a major exhibition where she wins an award for best nature photography. From their shared apartment in Tokyo, Suna congratulates her over the phone.
But the week drags on and her absence is painful. He craves her omurice and the low-salt crisps (which taste suspiciously like cardboard), and even finds himself calling out “tadaima” to no one at all. And it seems like, he’s not the only who feels depressed since both cats have decided to start a hunger strike because apparently what Suna feeds them doesn’t meet their standards (even Peko-chan refused the tuna he gave him.)
He looks at the photo album she made of their travels before bed. Suna is convinced that one day, their shelves will be overflowing not only with mugs but with albums (because they have many years ahead of them, many more moments to share).
He forgets what his life looked like before her, not that it matters anymore, Suna wouldn’t mind erasing every memory from his head to keep exclusively the ones with her.
She finally returns home with the award, and he picks her up from the airport (driving a little too fast and barely stopping at red lights, don’t tell her). When they step in the doorway, Suna grabs her waist and pulls her against him tightly, his face nestles in her neck.
“Rintarou…” she chuckles and grabs his hair—he loves when she does that—“I stink because of the flight, let me take a shower.”
Her cat meows to get her attention.
But Suna wants her all to himself.
“Say tadaima,” he orders, sounding like a child.
She blinks in confusion, then takes his face in her hands, planting a soft kiss on his lips. “Tadaima, my love.”
Suna wants to breathe the words, make it his oxygen. His lungs open, his whole blood is filled with an air he never felt before.
Gosh, she’s everything, he tells himself.
“Okaeri.” He responds.
They take a shower together (until the water runs cold), they order take away (burgers with an extra slice of fries), they watch her stupid reality show (Suna starts to be invested in the drama), he falls asleep on her lap, the cats join him.
That night, Suna dreams that it lasts forever.
(It will.)
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author notes: if you read Phoenix and Ashes and Don’t you dare run away you know that i haven’t depicted suna as the most loving and kind human being, but what i enjoy so much about writing is that we can develop complex characters who evolve, fail, get better or worse, and make them experience life-changing events. so i really loved describing this new version of suna and make him fall in love again.
anyway a lot of talking haha when i just wanted to give sunarin a happy ending <3
i hope you enjoyed reading this and I’m gonna go working on the kageyama fic now 👀
63 notes · View notes
ravenrothstr · 2 days ago
Text
Me and You, and The Spaces In Between
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summary. Y/N takes a long vacation after a heated argument with her boss. With her career hanging by a thread, she escapes to a peaceful getaway, where she unexpectedly meets Jaehyun, unaware of his identity.
genre. idol! au. work! au. fluff
words count. 18.0k
disclaimer. the story is fully fictional. other names mentioned are just for the story and pure imagination, with no bad intentions
tags. @apolloxxivmin
-- ˚˖𓍢ִ໋`🌿:✧˚.📷⋆𖧧 --
Every day, you drift through the same grey office building, slip into your usual seat, a quiet figure lost in the current of bustling lives. Your weight is invisible but suffocating—a relentless pressure that wraps around your chest and pulls your shoulders low. Surrounded by colleagues who hardly notice you, you feel like a ghost, an echo fading in a room with louder voices.
"Good morning, sir", you greeted your boss, Mr Noh.
Unanswered, unnoticed. Like always.
The hierarchy here is an unbreakable chain, with you at the very bottom. You feel it every day, every slight glance past you, every ignored idea, every task passed down without a thought. Numbed by the countless responsibilities that serve everyone else but you.
Each day feels the same as the last, blurring into a cycle that leaves you feeling less alive. Trapped within this silent existence, you wonder if you’ve forgotten how to hope.
"Y/N, meeting", Aeri reminded you.
And once again, it feels like you woke up on the wrong side of the bed when you hear your boss call you in privately to his office.
"We're giving you some time off."
"Pardon?"
You pause, recalling the tense moment with your manager, Mr. Han, when you submitted a proposal under your own name instead of his. The argument had been fierce—no one else in the company had ever been bold enough to stand up to him like that.
--
"You know how this company operates. It’s about hierarchy and respect. This isn’t a game, Y/N. You’re fortunate to even be here. You need to understand your place," Mr. Han said, his tone looking down on you.
Finally, you looked up to meet his gaze.
"Looks like you’re lucky too, Mr. Han. If we were recognizing talent, you’d be beneath me."
--
You were confused. Why would you be receiving time off? Were they suspending you for knowing your worth and finally pointing out the mistakes in the company?
"Y/N, I suggest you take a break for a month or two. We know working in this industry, especially for women, can be challenging, with emotions and all."
Your heart sank. You understood what he meant, even if he avoided the term. You walked back to your desk to pack up your things as your coworkers began to whisper around you. You tried your best to swallow the situation, but you couldn’t help catching Mr Han out of the corner of your eye—perfectly sitting at his desk, leaning back in his chair, unsuspended and free of any disciplinary action.
What a world we live in.
--
As you walk home, your heart begins to shatter. No one ever warned you about being an adult when you were a kid. All the stories summed up life with nice things—love, happiness, hope.
Hope.
Something you haven’t felt in a long time.
The next day feels strangely different as if the world has shifted ever so slightly in the light of dawn. You’ve cried the whole night, the weight of everything finally breaking through the dam you had built within.
As the first rays of sunlight peek through your window, you reach for your laptop. The familiar device now feels like a portal to the past. You pull up old photos as a wave of nostalgia washes over you. They’re snapshots of a time when life felt more colourful, the world more open.
"I was so happy, everything was brighter", you thought to yourself.
You can almost hear the laughter and feel the warmth of those sunlit moments. You remember the promise you once made to yourself: “I’ll capture whatever makes me happy.” It was your goal, your way of finding beauty in the everyday.
As you linger on a particularly beautiful shot, quiet determination begins to bloom in your chest. In that fleeting moment of clarity, you realize what you truly need: to escape, to break free from the chains that have held you down for far too long, and to reclaim the part of yourself that has been lost in the shadows.
--
“Jeju? What’s with the random trip?” Aeri’s voice crackled through the phone as you made the call after arriving at Jeju Airport.
You paused at her response, recalling the dark moments you had faced recently. You longed to tell her how you felt like you were dying inside, but now wasn’t the time.
“Well, it’s a long story,” you replied, trying to keep your tone light, though a hint of weariness slipped through. Aeri hesitated on the other end, sensing something was off.
“Are you okay, Y/N? You sound… different.”
You glanced around the busy airport, considering her concern.
“I’ll talk about it later,” you said finally, trying to sound reassuring. “I just need some time to clear my head.”
Aeri sighed, still worried. “Alright, but take care of yourself, okay? And call me if you need anything. I’ll be here.”
“Thanks, Aeri,” you said softly.
With that, you hung up and slipped your phone back into your bag. As you stepped out of the airport, a sense of relief washed over you. Jeju was beautiful, even under the cloak of night. You couldn’t help but smile, feeling lighter already. This was exactly what you needed—a place far removed from all the chaos.
--
After checking in at your hotel, you were eager to explore, despite the late hour. Spotting a nearby bike rental station, you quickly rented one, excitement bubbling inside you as you anticipated soaking in the atmosphere of Jeju at night.
Pedalling along the quiet streets, the cool night air, and the gentle sound of waves crashing in the distance created a soothing backdrop. The moon casted a silvery light that danced on the water. You felt a surge of freedom as you rode, each pedal pushing you further away from the chaos of your life.
"Please, just let time stop. Just for a moment," you thought as you pedaled, enjoying the peacefulness around you.
But then, as you turned a corner, disaster struck. You didn’t see the other bike until it was too late, and with a loud clunk, you collided, sending both of you off balance. You stumbled to a stop, heart racing, and looked up to see a young man—his surprised expression mirroring your own.
“Oh no, I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, rushing to check if he was alright.
He brushed himself off, standing tall with a sharp glare. His features were striking, and you could sense his annoyance, though he didn’t seem to want to dwell on it. As you both steadied your bikes, you felt the tension in the air.
“I didn’t mean to ruin your ride,” you said, feeling slightly embarrassed. “I’m really sorry. It was an accident.”
He sighed, his frustration still evident, but he seemed to be reining it in.
“Just… be careful next time,” he muttered, adjusting his bike before giving you one last look and riding off into the night.
You stood there, watching him go, your initial embarrassment shifting to frustration. This definitely wasn’t how you had pictured starting your trip. Just when you thought the encounter was over, fate had other plans.
--
The next morning, you wandered down to the hotel’s cozy café for breakfast. The rich aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, mingling with the scent of warm pastries. You settled at a small table near the open terrace, enjoying the view of the sun rising over the horizon.
You began to take out your new film camera, a camera you had once promised yourself you would fill with happy encounters, but that promise had fallen by the wayside as you drowned yourself in work. Struggling to get a grip on how it functioned, you started to look through the settings when a figure walked past your table.
It was him—the guy from last night. He sat down at his own table, and as soon as he caught sight of you, he rolled his eyes dramatically, as if to say not you again. Your stomach twisted slightly, but you decided to ignore him, focusing instead on your camera.
After finishing your meal, you grabbed your camera and stepped outside, eager to immerse yourself in the beauty of Jeju. The streets were alive with colour, and you began to capture the scenes around you—lush greenery, quaint shops, and the stunning coastline.
You wandered through the local market, snapping photos of the bustling vendors and their vibrant displays of fresh produce and handmade goods. Your heart lifted with each click of the shutter, the camera becoming an extension of your desire to find joy in the small things.
As you moved deeper into the market, you caught sight of him again. He was at a stall, inspecting some fruit. You took a deep breath, reminding yourself that you didn’t need to let his presence affect your mood. Instead, you focused on capturing the essence of the market, the lively interactions, and the warmth of the people around you.
But the moment you turned your camera towards the stall he was at, he noticed you. You could see his annoyance as he shot you an incredulous look, clearly irritated that you were taking pictures in the same space. He waved his hand dismissively as if trying to shoo you away.
This time, you couldn’t help but smirk. You weren’t about to let his irritation spoil your experience. You continued to film, zooming in on the vibrant colors and lively atmosphere, reveling in your newfound freedom.
You decided to embrace the moment, letting the world around you inspire you rather than letting him dampen your spirits. It was a new day, and you were determined to make the most of it—no matter who else was in the frame.
With the sun beginning to set, casting a warm golden hue over Jeju, you decided to call it a day. You returned to your hotel room, feeling a sense of fulfilment from capturing the beauty of the island. As you entered the room, the familiar buzz of your phone interrupted your thoughts. It was your mom calling.
“Y/N! Where have you been? You need to come back home!” she scolded, her voice a mix of worry and frustration.
You close your shut eyes for a moment, wishing the situation was just a dream.
“Mom, I’m on vacation. I told you I needed some time away,” you replied, trying to keep your tone steady.
“Time away? This isn’t just a vacation! You’re running from your responsibilities! You think it’s okay to just leave everything behind?” Her words felt like a punch to the gut.
“I’m not running away. I just need a break to think,” you protested, your frustration bubbling over. “I can’t deal with everything right now.”
“You think you can just ignore your responsibilities? Your brother needs support, and you should be helping your family, not gallivanting around Jeju!” she snapped.
You clenched your fists, tears filling up your eyes resulting to you trying to suppress the anger rising within you as you ended the call. Everything felt like a mess now, and you didn’t need any additions to that.
You wanted to cry; you needed to cry.
You began to look around your room, searching for an escape. Grabbing your film camera, you decided to take a walk along the beach.
You gazed out at the vast, dark sea, wishing your life could be as calm as the ocean before you. With each soft crash, you felt your sadness slowly wash away, like footprints disappearing under the water. For a good ten minutes, you stood there, breathing deeply, letting the steady hum of the sea drown out the noise in your mind.
When you finally opened your eyes, the world felt lighter, your heart less heavy. You wiped away the last tears, determined to hide any evidence of your pain. With your camera ready, you prepared to capture this peaceful moment you wanted to hold onto.
But just as you were about to take the shot, you spotted him—the man you had bumped into earlier. You sighed, thinking, of all the places. You weren’t in the mood for another encounter.
“I knew it, you were one of them,” he said.
You tried to ignore him; you had no energy to argue.
“I’m calling the cops on you.”
“Great,” you replied, sarcasm lacing your voice.
--
“She’s a sasaeng,” the man stated, crossing his arms. “She keeps following me around, and I want to file a report.”
You felt a wave of disbelief wash over you. You both found yourselves at the police station, the atmosphere tense and awkward. He stood confidently at the desk, explaining his version of events to the officer, who listened with a raised eyebrow.
“I don’t even know you or your name. Sir, this is ridiculous,” you said.
The officer glanced between the two of you, clearly intrigued by the unfolding drama. But it was hard to believe you didn’t know him; you seemed genuine yet utterly uninterested in Jaehyun, a very famous idol.
“So, you’re saying you don’t know him?”
“Yes! I only bumped into him a few times. How does that make me a stalker?”
Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “Why are you so defensive? You’re the one who keeps showing up wherever I am.”
“I’ll just remind you that we’re on a small island,” you shot back, but the officer interrupted.
“Okay, let’s settle down. Ma’am, can you provide your name and occupation?”
You opened your mouth, ready to say, “I’m an accountant at—” but then it hit you like a cold wave. You weren't an accountant anymore; you had been suspended from your job. The reality of your situation dawned on you, and suddenly, you felt lost.
You froze in the moment, a flood of emotions swirling inside you. Who were you without your job? Had you tied solely to your work? Did you even know what you liked or disliked anymore?
With a heavy heart, you looked up at the officer, and instead of your title, you simply stated.
“Just write Y/N, unemployed.”
Jaehyun raised an eyebrow, and for the first time, his irritation seemed to fade slightly. Maybe you weren’t really a stalker; you were just here for peace of mind like he was.
You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself to explain your side, but a part of you couldn’t shake the feeling that you were no longer the person you once claimed to be.
The incident ended with the officer clarifying that you were not a stalker, emphasizing that it was simply a misunderstanding. Jaehyun also acknowledged that you genuinely didn’t know who he was.
Ultimately, the officer concluded that both of you should avoid each other to prevent any further distress.
As you both stepped away from the desk, the tension began to dissipate. Outside, the cold evening air brushed against your skin, and an unexpected silence hung between you for a brief moment.
“I didn’t mean to cause any trouble,” Jaehyun said, his tone more conciliatory now. “It’s just… it’s hard to escape from all this sometimes.”
“Tell me about it,” you replied, letting your guard down for the first time.
He exhaled, rubbing his neck. “Look, I’m sorry. My group’s been through a lot, and trusting strangers doesn’t come easy anymore.”
“Your group… NCT?”
His expression softened, pride flickering in his eyes. “Yeah, that’s us.”
You nodded, your gaze lingering. “I get it. Caution makes sense.”
“I’m sorry, too,” you murmured.
His eyes stayed on you, gentler now as the cool night wind tousled your hair, and for a quiet, heart-stopping moment, he just looked at you.
A small smile broke across his face. “No hard feelings.”
--
The night air was calm as you fell into step beside each other, walking back toward the hotel. The silence was surprisingly comfortable, but you couldn't calm down your emotions.
Somewhere in the ease, you felt tears gather in your eyes and Jaehyun was quick to sense it as you turned your head towards the sea to avoid him.
“So…” Jaehyun began, hoping to distract you. “What brings you here, then? To Jeju?”
Quickly, you brushed away the tears on your cheek and looked up at him.
“Just… a short escape,” your voice soft and unsteady. “Work, life… everything started feeling like too much.” He listened intently, his gaze steady, as if inviting you to say more.
“I felt like I was drowning. Coming here was supposed to be my chance to breathe again. And then… well, then you happened,” you added with a faint, self-conscious smile.
A warm chuckle escaped him as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Guess I ruined that, didn’t I?”
“Maybe just a little,” you teased, your smile widening as you caught his gaze. “But I suppose I can forgive you. I must have ruined yours too.”
He shrugged, a playful glint in his eyes. “It’s alright. A night walk by the ocean seems like a pretty good way to make it up.”
You both smiled, the soft night air carrying a quiet understanding between you. A gentle breeze swept over, and he looked up at the stars, his hands in his pockets.
“You know… after so long being on stage and in front of crowds, it’s strange to be away from it all. I don’t think I’ve ever really had a chance to just… breathe. I thought I wanted this break, but now…” His voice drifted off, hesitant, as though he feared where his words might lead.
“But now?” you asked softly, inviting him to continue.
He looked at you, a vulnerability in his gaze you hadn’t seen before. “Now, I’m not even sure who I am without all of that.”
His words hung in the quiet night, and in that moment, you saw Jaehyun not as an idol but as someone searching, just like you. And suddenly, it struck you—you weren’t alone in your own struggles.
“Maybe that’s okay. Life is about figuring it out the next day-”
“After all, this is our first time living.”
His gaze softened as if the simple gesture meant more than either of you were prepared to admit. By the time you reached the hotel, the conversation had lulled into a quiet, companionable silence.
You both moved towards the elevator, standing side by side in silence. As the doors slid open, Jaehyun stepped in first, holding the door for you.
“Thanks,” you murmured, taking a step inside.
After pressing your respective floors, the elevator hummed softly as it ascended. Jaehyun glanced over at you, but you seemed lost in thought.
“Look, about earlier…” he started, unsure of how to continue, but you interrupted.
“I don’t want to make this a big deal. Let’s just keep our distance and enjoy our vacations.”
“Sure,” he replied, a bit reluctantly.
As the elevator came to a stop, the doors opened, and you stepped out, leaving a lingering tension in the air as you both went your separate ways, still unsure of what this unexpected connection meant moving forward.
--
The next morning, Jaehyun strolled down to the hotel dining area for breakfast, feeling a mix of anticipation and apprehension. As he scanned the room, he spotted you at a table in the corner, engrossed in your iPad. You seemed to be in your own world, occasionally glancing up as if lost in thought.
He hesitated for a moment, debating whether to approach you or not. Just then, you looked up and caught his gaze. A flicker of recognition crossed your face, and for a brief moment, it looked like he was about to smile. But then, you quickly stood up, gathering your things.
“Hey, it’s okay. I was just about to leave,” you said, attempting to keep your tone light.
There was an edge of awkwardness in your voice. You didn't want to impose on his space, especially after the previous night's tension.
“Wait, you don’t have to go,” he said, his words felt like they were lost in the air. Jaehyun’s heart sank as he watched you stand up.
"It's okay, I was finished anyway"
“Really, it’s fine,” he insisted, trying to sound convincing, but the sincerity in his voice didn’t seem to reach you.
As you walked away, Jaehyun’s quiet presence lingered in your mind as you stepped away, clutching your phone. Every ring from Mr Han felt like a reminder of all you’d been trying to escape from, of the life you’d left behind for a few days in search of peace. You quickly find a quiet corner where you can take the call.
“Mr. Han, I—” you started, trying to find the right words, but the frustration in your former boss’s voice cut through the line.
“Y/N, you really need to get back to me. The client is waiting!”
Heat rose in your cheeks as you tried to stay calm. “I understand, but I’m not in a position to help right now as I—” The anxiety surged, your breath growing shallow.
You couldn’t finish your sentence. Gripping the wall beside you for support, you closed your eyes, your breathing ragged as you struggled to keep yourself steady. Feeling you could drown from your cold sweats. With shaking hands, you ended the call, unable to continue.
The pressure of everything—the job you’d left, the life you’d momentarily escaped—felt like a weight pressing down. You barely noticed when you turned, and there he was, standing close, his gaze soft and filled with worry.
“Y/N?” Jaehyun’s voice was a quiet thread of concern woven into each syllable. “Are you alright?”
You let out a shaky breath, feeling the weight of everything crash down on you. The distance between you and Jaehyun felt insurmountable, but the urge to lean on him was overwhelming.
“Yes… I’m okay. I’m just trying to find balance,” you said, your voice trembling.
“Y/N, you need more than that,” he insisted.
He guided you to a nearby bench, the quiet warmth of his hand on your shoulder grounding you.
“You don’t have to explain if you don’t want to,” he said softly. “Just… breathe. Let’s sit for a minute".
For a moment, you just sat there, grateful for his quiet support.
“Thank you, Jaehyun,” you murmured, overwhelmed by his kindness.
“I’m just doing what anyone would,” he said softly, studying your face. “Are you okay now? You know, it’s alright to take a break.”
“I wish it were that easy,” you admitted, the frustration heavy in your voice.
Before you could collect your thoughts, your phone buzzed again. Another message from Mr. Han. You glanced at Jaehyun, and he looked at you with sympathy, silently acknowledging the struggle you were facing.
“I don’t think you should answer that,” he said gently.
“It’s just work. I should deal with this,” you said reluctantly, the thought of the conversation ahead making your stomach twist.
Before you took the call, you glanced at Jaehyun, fear flickering in your eyes. He offered you a reassuring smile.
“I'll be here,” he said softly.
With a heavy heart, you stepped back, torn between the connection you craved and the unrelenting demands of your reality.
--
You both walked to a small café along the coast. The atmosphere was quiet and cozy, the gentle hum of soft music wrapping around you like a warm blanket. Jaehyun went to order for both of you, reminding you of the moment he suggested it when you slipped your phone back into your pocket.
“How about we grab some coffee?” he had said, his tone warm and inviting
When he returned to the table with two steaming cups, you took a moment to really look at him. How gentle and kind he was towards you softened your heart. How lucky he loved once to receive such affirmation. His fingers linger on yours as he passes you your drink.
"Thanks", you murmured.
The silences between you are like the soft pattern of rain outside. It was as if the calmness of the café had created a peaceful bubble that allowed both of you to just be. No words were needed, just the quiet company of each other and the warmth of your coffee. After a while, you took a deep breath and broke the silence.
"Jaehyun," you started, your voice soft, your eyes still trained on the rain outside. "I’m sorry. I'm sorry about last night, about this morning-"
He looked at you, but you couldn’t meet his gaze just yet.
"I didn’t mean to cause a scene or make things uncomfortable. I'm just… not handling things well. I was so overwhelmed."
Jaehyun’s brow furrowed slightly, but he remained quiet, waiting for you to continue.
"I guess what I’m trying to say is," you hesitated, finally turning to face him, "I want to repay you for stepping in, for making sure I was okay. You didn’t have to, but you did, and I really appreciate it."
You gestured toward your plate. "So, I’m paying for this. Consider it my way of saying thank you."
"You don’t have to repay me, Y/N. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."
"But I want to," you insisted, your eyes practically pleading. "Let me do this, okay?"
Jaehyun chuckled softly, holding your gaze. "Alright, I won’t argue with free coffee."
Relief washed over you as a smile finally tugged at your lips, and he smiled back, the warmth in his eyes making everything feel lighter, easier.
"Finally," he thought to himself, glad to see your walls slowly coming down.
You and Jaehyun stepped outside the café, and the fresh scent of rain on the pavement lingered in the air. As you linger on the ambience Jaehyun notices you taking out your film camera, but you seem to struggle as you try to adjust the camera.
Jaehyun, noticing his uncertainty, tilted his head with a curious smile. "Need some help with that?"
"Yeah, I’m still getting the hang of it. Do you…?"
Without a word, he stepped closer, gently taking the camera from his hands.
"Here, I’ll show you," he said.
His fingers brushed against yours as you adjusted the settings, and you couldn’t help but feel a small flutter in your chest.
You bring the camera up to eye level as you point it toward a bright red umbrella left forgotten near the edge of a shop.
"How about something that stands out but blends in with the mood of the scene? Like that umbrella there,"
You handed the camera back to you, guiding your hands to the right angle as he stood close behind you. His presence was calming but you couldn't help feeling a tangled in your stomach.
"Focus on that,"
You took a deep breath, following his advice, and snapped the shot. The sound of the shutter felt satisfying, and as you glanced down at the preview, a small sense of accomplishment swelled in you.
"Perfect, you’ve got a good eye for this."
"You should seen my mentor," you teased, your smile widening.
He grinned, stepping back slightly, his eyes lingering on you for a moment before he turned back toward the rainy street.
"Want to take a few more? There’s plenty of stories out here, especially in the rain."
For the rest of the afternoon, the two of you wandered the quiet streets of Jeju, capturing fleeting moments—a woman pulling her scarf tighter against the breeze, raindrops collecting on a parked bicycle, and an old couple sharing an umbrella. Each moment shared between you and Jaehyun felt easy, and natural, like the rhythm of the rain.
--
You both held ice cream cones as you settled on a bench near the shore. The sun peeked through the clouds, casting a soft glow as you savored each delicious bite. Just as you took another lick of your ice cream, the clouds grew dark, and drops of rain began to fall.
“Jaehyun, we need to run!” you exclaimed cheerfully, quickly covering your ice cream with your hands.
In a rush, you both sprinted to a nearby market, trying your best to stay shaded under the roof outside. You could feel his laughter vibrating in the air as you both struggled to keep your ice cream cones from getting drenched.
As you continued to finish your ice cream, savoring the sweet flavor, you turned your gaze back to the shoreline. The ocean's sound was soothing and calming despite the downpour, creating a scene that felt straight out of a movie. Just then, you stole a glance at Jaehyun.
His laughter was infectious, and the way he scrunched up his nose while trying to protect his treat made your heart flutter. It felt like you were falling into a deeper ocean, one filled with warmth and joy.
You pulled out your camera to capture the moment. The raindrops danced on the surface of the water, creating a mesmerizing pattern.
"Just for the memories," you thought.
Jaehyun turned to you, curiosity shining in his eyes.
“So, do you take pictures as a hobby or professionally?” he asked.
“Just a hobby, actually. I don't recall having any photogenic pictures in my album,” you replied, chuckling at the thought. "I just take what makes me happy,"
"But we just spent the day capturing random moments. Regardless, they're still really beautiful to me," he defended, his gaze sincere.
"Well, it was fun for me," you said, your smile widening.
Jaehyun's expression softened, and a bright smile spread across his face, illuminating his features even in the dim light of the rainy day. There was something disarming about the way he smiled, as if the world around you faded into the background, leaving just the two of you in your own little bubble.
His enthusiasm was infectious, and you couldn't help but feel a thrill at the thought of more days like this. For the first time in so long, you found yourself eagerly waiting for the next day. The rain continued to fall around you, but it only added to the magic of the moment, making everything feel fresh and alive.
"Do you think we'll ever meet again? Somewhere not here?" you asked, a hint of vulnerability creeping into your voice.
Jaehyun’s expression shifted, becoming more serious as he stared deeply into the rain.
“I hope so,” he said slowly, turning to face you. “I really wish we could get closer, even after this vacation is over," his gaze unwavering.
His sincerity wrapped around you like a warm embrace, and for a moment, the world outside the small market felt like a distant echo. You could see the longing in his eyes, a reflection of your own feelings. The connection you’d formed felt too precious to let slip away, despite the uncertainty of what lay ahead.
“I would like that too,” you admitted, your heart pounding in your chest.
--
As the days passed, your time together seemed to fly by, each moment filled with laughter and shared secrets. But all too soon, the end of your vacation arrived, and the reality of parting ways settled heavily in the air.
You found yourself standing outside the hotel, your suitcase at your feet, the familiar buzz of the bustling streets around you fading into a dull roar. Jaehyun stood a few feet away, his hands stuffed deep into his pockets, a contemplative expression clouding his features.
“Guess this is it, huh?” he said, attempting to sound light-hearted, but the weight of the moment hung heavily between you.
“Yeah, it feels surreal,” you replied, forcing a smile despite the tightness in your chest.
You had hoped that this moment wouldn’t come, that time would stretch on indefinitely, allowing you to hold on to the connection you had formed. He took a step closer, his eyes searching yours.
“I really enjoyed our time together. It was… different, in a good way. It was nice to be around someone who didn’t see me just as Jaehyun from NCT. You reminded me of what it’s like to just be… myself.””
You nodded, feeling a bittersweet tug at your heart. “I’m glad I met you. And, I’ll always remember this time.”
A silence enveloped you both, filled only by the distant sounds of laughter and traffic. As the moments stretched, you couldn’t help but feel a void beginning to form in your heart. It was a feeling you hadn’t anticipated, one that blossomed from the realization that you had fallen for him during this brief interlude in your lives.
Jaehyun shifted, his gaze dropping to the ground before meeting your eyes again. “Come see me at my concert sometime, let's meet again,” he said, his tone hopeful.
The offer hung in the air between you—simple, yet charged with unspoken meaning. You hesitated, caught between the desire to say yes and the reality of the busy life waiting for you back home.
“I’ll think about it,”
You both lingered in the moment, neither wanting to be the first to say goodbye. Eventually, Jaehyun glanced at his phone, a reminder of his own responsibilities tugging him back.
“Take care of yourself, Y/N,” he said, his voice gentle yet firm, as if he genuinely wanted you to find peace.
“You too, Jaehyun. Don’t lose yourself in all of it,” feeling a surge of protectiveness for him.
With a final smile, you watched as he disappeared into the bustling crowd, your chest heavy yet filled with a strange sense of hope. As you made your way to the airport, you found yourself holding on to the memories of Jeju—of sunlit days, stolen glances, and quiet conversations.
Back in your own world, things quickly resumed their usual pace. Work piled up, Mr. Han’s demands didn’t ease, and the familiar pressures of life weighed on your shoulders. But every so often, you’d catch yourself replaying moments from Jeju: Jaehyun’s smile, the way his laughter echoed along the shore, the quiet understanding that had passed between you.
--
"Ah, that was a super long meeting," you sighed, leaning back in your chair and closing your eyes.
"Tell me about it," Aeri replied from her desk, looking equally drained.
Just then, the secretary approached you, holding a note in her hand. "Y/N, someone left a message asking you to call them back."
You glanced up, confused, and exchanged a quick look with Aeri, hoping for some clue. But she looked just as surprised. Hesitantly, you dialled the number, feeling a surge of anxiety as the call connected.
"Hello?"
"Yes, is this Y/N?"
"Yes, this is Y/N speaking. Can I help you?"
"I'm a staff member from SM Entertainment. Jaehyun requested a direct invitation for you to his concert…" Your heart dropped, and every word became a blur after hearing Jaehyun’s name.
You quickly looked at the calendar. Had it really been months since your trip to Jeju? The staff member kindly repeated the message, explaining that Jaehyun had arranged a ticket and backstage pass for you.
"I'm… sorry, but could I get back to you on this?" you asked, still trying to process the unexpected invitation.
"Of course," they replied. "We'll leave your name on the VIP list. If you decide to come, just let the staff know at the VIP section."
You hung up, your mind racing. You never imagined Jaehyun would follow through on his promise, let alone make it so personal. As you stared at your phone, you couldn’t help but wonder if you were ready to step back into that world—or if you even wanted to.
That evening, you had dinner with Aeri, who was as cheerful and lighthearted as always. Watching her laugh, you couldn’t bring yourself to share your concerns about Jaehyun. Somehow, her happiness felt too precious to disturb. After a moment, you decided to break the silence.
"Hey, Aeri," you began, trying to keep your voice casual. "Do you know NCT?"
"Of course, who doesn’t!" she laughed, and you could feel your nerves creeping up. But then, she added with a casual shrug, "Besides, my boyfriend’s from that group."
Your jaw dropped. "Your boyfriend is an idol?!"
She quickly shushed you, almost flipping over the table to keep you from speaking too loudly. Glancing around the restaurant, she sighed and whispered, "Yes. I didn’t mean to hide it, or that I don’t trust you. It’s just… you know, we’re kind of friends from work, and I didn't want things to get complicated."
You smiled, absorbing the surprise. Somehow, knowing she understood the complexities of dating someone in the public eye made you feel a bit less alone in your own tangled thoughts about Jaehyun’s invitation.
As the days crept closer to the concert, you continued to hold it all in, the uncertainty gnawing at you. On the evening before, you finally took a deep breath and decided to invite Aeri along. You figured her presence might ease the nerves and make it all feel a bit more normal.
"Aeri," you said, and she responded with a distracted "Hm?" without lifting her gaze from her work, so you decided to keep it short.
"I, uh… I got an invite to the NCT concert. Would you want to come with me?"
Aeri’s eyes widened in surprise and excitement, her fingers pausing on the keyboard. "Are you serious? Of course! How did you even score an invite like that?"
“Just… something that came up, you know?” you shrugged, keeping it vague.
“It’s going to be amazing! I can’t believe we’re actually going to see them perform live!”
Her enthusiasm brought a smile to your face, and, for a moment, the tension in your chest eased. With Aeri beside you, maybe facing Jaehyun again wouldn’t feel so daunting after all.
--
The night of the concert arrived, and as you stood outside the venue with Aeri, you could feel your heart racing. The bustling crowd, glowing lights, and excited chatter filled the air with an electric energy. Aeri, practically buzzing beside you, squeezed your arm as you both made your way to the VIP entrance. Her excitement was contagious, and you felt a flicker of it yourself, though nerves twisted in your stomach as you thought of the reason behind your invitation.
Inside, the venue felt even more surreal. The rows of seats stretched out like a sea, and the stage glowed with anticipation as fans filled the room. Your VIP passes led you closer than you’d imagined, right near the front, and as you settled in, you felt Aeri’s hand in yours.
“Can you believe we’re this close?” she whispered, her eyes gleaming. “We’re about to see them, live!”
The lights dimmed, and a hush fell over the crowd, followed by a collective gasp as the stage illuminated, and NCT appeared. The opening beats hit, and the whole arena seemed to come alive as the members took their places, Jaehyun among them. Your eyes drifted to him, a mix of emotions stirring as he sang, danced, and commanded the stage effortlessly. In that moment, he looked entirely different from the man you’d spent time with on Jeju—a star in every sense.
Aeri was in her element, cheering along with the crowd, and you found yourself swept up in her excitement. The concert unfolded like a dream, each song weaving between moments of high energy and softer ballads that made the arena feel intimate. As you watched Jaehyun move across the stage, your mind flickered back to all the memories you’d shared, and a pang of nostalgia washed over you.
“Isn’t this amazing?” Aeri exclaimed during a brief interlude, her face glowing.
You nodded, forcing a smile, but your heart was conflicted. This night was as exhilarating as it was overwhelming, and as Jaehyun’s gaze swept over the audience, you wondered if he’d see you and recognize you in the crowd.
The concert came to a close with an eruption of applause and cheers, the room filled with the lingering energy of excitement. As the lights brightened, Aeri was practically bouncing beside you, her excitement escalating as you both made your way to the backstage entrance.
In the waiting room, NCT members were casually chatting after the high-energy performance. When you and Aeri entered, they greeted you warmly, and Aeri, in particular, seemed over the moon. She introduced herself and excitedly complimented the members, her enthusiasm making them all laugh.
“Hey! Thanks for coming!”, Taeyong greeted.
“Hi, thank you for having us,” you responded, a little overwhelmed by how down-to-earth they were despite their star status.
They were friendly and approachable, making small talk that felt genuine rather than forced. Then, you saw him—Jaehyun, standing at the far end of the room. He hadn’t noticed you at first, busy talking with another member, but when he turned and saw you, his expression softened instantly. His eyes met yours, and he broke into that familiar smile that had haunted your thoughts since Jeju.
“You actually came,” he said, his voice tinged with a hint of disbelief and relief.
“I didn’t think I would, honestly. But here I am”, feeling your nerves flutter. “Thanks for inviting me. It’s… surreal seeing you here.”
“I’m glad you came. Really,” Jaehyun replied, his voice sincere.
“We’re actually heading to an after-party at a club nearby. You both should come! It’ll be fun!”
Aeri’s eyes lit up with enthusiasm. “Oh my gosh, we have to go! It sounds amazing!”
You felt a wave of hesitation wash over you. The idea of a club after the concert seemed exhilarating yet overwhelming.
“I’m not sure,” you said, glancing at Jaehyun, who was watching you with a hopeful expression.
Jaehyun stepped closer, his demeanour reassuring. “You’ll be with us. It’ll be a good time, I promise. Just think of it as a celebration.”
You sighed, weighing the pros and cons. The thought of missing out on an opportunity to bond with Jaehyun and Aeri made your heart sink, but the thought of the club’s atmosphere sent your anxiety into overdrive. Finally, you agree relented.
The moment you stepped inside, a wave of culture shock hit you. The atmosphere was electric, pulsating with music and vibrant lights. It was everything you had imagined but somehow more overwhelming.
"Come, stay close to me", Jaehyun grabbing your hand.
You were glad for a moment, but as all of you made it to the couch women were swooning over Jaehyun. You felt a pang of discomfort watching the attention he received; it was overwhelming for you. You kept close to Aeri, who was revelling in the excitement.
“Look at them! They’re totally obsessed!” she laughed, pointing out the fans who crowded around Jaehyun, capturing every moment on their phones.
Jaehyun, on the other hand, seemed completely unfazed by the attention. He mingled with ease, laughing and chatting while he would glance over at you occasionally.
You couldn’t help but feel lost. The club scene was so much different to your usual surroundings, and you were more aware than ever of the differences between your world and Jaehyun. As the night wore on, you tried to enjoy the night, but every laugh from the crowd felt like a reminder of your insecurities, and the joy you saw on Aeri’s face only made you feel more disconnected.
Jaehyun continued to glance your way, concern flickering across his features as he noticed your discomfort, but you couldn’t shake the feeling overwhelmed, you took a step back, needing a moment to breathe. The pulsating energy of the club felt too much, and you realized you weren’t really enjoying your time at all.
You glanced at Aeri, who was caught up in the moment, and your heart sank. You had hoped this would be a fun adventure, but instead, it was just a reminder of how far you felt from everything that was happening around you.
“Aeri, maybe we should head back? It’s getting pretty wild in here,” you suggested, trying to keep your voice steady amid the noise.
She shook her head, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
“No way! This is amazing! Just leave me for a bit; I want to enjoy this!” Aeri grinned, clearly swept up in the atmosphere.
Frustrated, you scanned the room, searching for someone to help. Just when you were about to give up, you felt a familiar presence behind you. Jaehyun appeared concerned etched across his face as he noticed the distress in yours.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice cutting through the chaos.
“I can't get Aeri to leave, I'm worried about her”
Without a second thought, Jaehyun nodded, taking charge.
“I’ll help. Let’s get her home,” he said decisively. With a reassuring grip, he took your hand, weaving through the throngs of people until you found Aeri, still lost in the music.
“Aeri, it’s time to go home,” he said gently, but there was an authority in his tone that she couldn’t ignore.
As the three of you made your way out of the club, Jaehyun kept a protective arm around you, making sure you felt safe amidst the chaos. Outside, the cool night air hit your skin, a refreshing change from the stifling atmosphere inside.
“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure she gets home safely,” Jaehyun reassured you, pulling out his phone to arrange a ride for Aeri.
His attention to detail and care made your heart swell a little, reminding you how he was to you at Jeju. Once the ride was confirmed, he turned to you, concern still lingering in his gaze.
“Are you okay?”, he asked.
You nodded, feeling grateful for his support. “Thanks for stepping in,” you said softly.
With Aeri safely in the car and waving goodbye, you turned to Jaehyun, feeling the weight of the night lift slightly.
“I’m sorry for dragging you into this mess,” you said, a hint of embarrassment creeping in.
“Hey, it’s not a mess if I’m here. Let’s get you home too, alright?”, he replied, his tone light but sincere.
As you both walked to his car, you felt a flicker of connection rekindling between you. Even in the chaos, there was a comfort in knowing he had your back, and for the first time that night, you felt a sense of calm wash over you.
“So, did you have fun at the club?” he asked, glancing at you with a hint of curiosity.
You paused, considering your response. “Honestly, I prefer to sit back and enjoy quiet moments,” you admitted.
Jaehyun looked surprised but intrigued. “Really? You didn’t enjoy the excitement?”
“It felt overwhelming. I like to unwind in my own way,”
He nodded, contemplating your words. “I get that. But I just thought it would be nice to share that experience with you.”
“I appreciate that,” you said softly, your heart fluttering at the thought of him wanting to include you. “I just… prefer quieter settings.”
“Maybe I can find a balance for both of us,” he suggested with a grin. “How about I invite you to a few more gatherings? Just to see if we can make it work.”
You felt a wave of anxiety wash over you, but you reminded yourself that it couldn’t hurt to try.
"Yeah, sure"
--
Over the next few weeks, you and Aeri joined Jaehyun and his friends on special occasions at the club. The flashing lights, pulsing music, and the lively atmosphere brought a new kind of excitement to your evenings. You enjoyed the laughter, the freedom to dance, and the chance to see Jaehyun in his element. But slowly, the late nights and the constant energy began to wear on you. You felt your enthusiasm dimming with each outing.
Still, every night, when the evening wound down and people started heading home, Jaehyun was there. He would walk you to his car, his hand lightly brushing against your back in a steady, comforting gesture. He’d ask if you were alright, his gaze full of quiet concern, and he’d listen when you tried to explain the small things that felt out of sync. Yet, even with his steady presence, you couldn’t shake the weariness that came from trying to belong in a world that didn’t feel like yours.
One night, as he was driving you home after yet another club outing, you found yourself staring out the window, watching the empty streets rush by. Jaehyun glanced over, sensing your silence.
“You seem… tired,” he said gently, breaking the quiet.
You sighed, nodding. “I am. It’s fun to go out and be with everyone, but… I don’t think this is really me.”
"You don’t have to keep coming just for me, you know,” he said. “I want you to feel comfortable.”
"I know, I really do. I just starting to think if we have another connection rather than these events,"
"Y/N, of course we do. Jeju was everything to me", he firmly defended.
The silence that fell between you both was thick, filled with unspoken words and questions. You stared out the window, your heart aching with the uncertainty, the shared nights that only left you feeling more adrift.
Jaehyun seemed to sense the tension too. Instead of pressing further, he let out a soft sigh and suddenly steered the car toward a small convenience store that glowed against the quiet street.
“Come on,” he said, parking and unbuckling his seatbelt. “Let’s get some ice cream. My treat.”
You glanced over at him, a little surprised but grateful for the change of pace. “Ice cream at midnight? Are we back in Jeju?” you teased lightly, letting a small smile escape.
“Maybe,” he grinned, opening his door. “Or maybe it’s my way of slowing things down—taking us back to something simple.”
The two of you entered the store, the fluorescent lights casting a soft glow over the rows of snacks and drinks. Jaehyun led you to the freezer aisle, opening it with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he considered the options.
“You choose,” he said, stepping aside to let you take your pick.
After a brief moment of indecision, you reached for your favorite flavor, and Jaehyun grabbed one for himself. The store was empty save for the clerk, who gave you both a nod as you paid and made your way back to the car.
Sitting on the table outside, you unwrapped your ice cream in comfortable silence, the cool night air brushing against your skin. The quiet felt soothing, like the ocean breeze back in Jeju.
Jaehyun glanced over before he spoke. “I know things have been… different. And I’m sorry if I didn’t see how you were feeling sooner.”
“It’s okay. I didn’t know how to bring it up,” you admitted, taking a small bite of ice cream.
He nodded, looking down thoughtfully. “I just thought… maybe you’d see a different side of me. That maybe we’d find new memories, even if they weren’t always perfect.”
“We did,” you said softly. “But I think I just wanted a side of you that felt a little closer. More like this.”
Jaehyun’s face softened, a small smile tugging at his lips.
“Let’s keep it simple, then. The way it should be.”
You nodded, feeling a warmth spread through you. And in that quiet moment under the stars, with only the hum of the city around you, you both found a new kind of connection that felt real, like the kind that would last even when the music faded.
--
"So, why don’t you take photos of people?" Jaehyun asked over dinner that evening.
He had invited you to his place, a rare occasion given both of your busy schedules—especially with him working on his solo album. These days, it felt like you hardly saw each other, but recently, he’d been reaching out more.
More than a friend would.
You flipped through the faded photos of Jeju scattered on the table, both of you reminiscing about the quiet beauty captured in each frame.
“Sometimes, the happiness we see in people is just a mask hiding what they’re really feeling,” you explained softly. “I thought I’d rather respect that.”
Jaehyun nodded thoughtfully, his gaze shifting back to you.
“So, are you masking something now?” he asked, a playful glint in his eyes.
“Yes, yes I am,” you replied with a grin.
“Are you going to be honest and tell me?”
“Nope, I’m keeping you guessing.”
“Unbelievable,” he muttered, chuckling as he shook his head.
You looked at his vintage Polaroid camera, an idea forming.
“Alright, how about this?” you proposed. “Let’s take a picture of each other and exchange them. I’ll write my true feelings on your photo, and you’ll do the same on mine. But there’s one rule: we only give the photos back when we’re ready to reveal what we really feel. Deal?”
Jaehyun looked at you, captivated by the idea. He was so absorbed in your words that he took a moment to respond.
“Deal.”
You both took turns photographing each other, trying to hide your shyness by laughing and teasing. When it was Jaehyun’s turn to photograph you, he held up the Polaroid, his gaze warm and intent.
“Alright, turn a little to the left,” he instructed, his voice soft but focused. “Now, smile.”
You followed his direction, feeling a bit silly under his careful watch. The camera clicked, capturing the moment, but he didn’t lower it just yet.
“That’s perfect,” he murmured, a faint smile playing on his lips. “You look… beautiful.”
Your cheeks warmed at his compliment.
“Let me see!” you demanded with a playful grin as the photo developed.
When it was your turn to photograph him, Jaehyun relaxed into the moment, and you couldn’t resist teasing him a bit.
“Tilt your head just a bit,” you instructed. “Now, give me that serious look you do on stage.”
He smirked but complied, trying to keep his expression neutral, though the hint of a smile broke through. You clicked the shutter, capturing the side of him that felt both familiar and new. When the photos finished developing, you handed his picture back to him with a grin.
“Take a look at yours! Before it officially becomes mine,” you teased, your eyes gleaming with amusement. “You look really good. I’m lucky to have this picture.”
Jaehyun’s heart skipped a beat at your words, charmed by your cheerful excitement. He couldn’t help but find you adorable.
You each wrote down your true feelings on the photos, not knowing what the other had written. You both tucked the photos away, holding onto them as though they held something precious.
--
As you step out of the office building, your phone rings. Jaehyun’s name appears on the screen, and despite your exhaustion, a smile lights up your face.
“Hello, Jaehyun.”
“Hey, Y/N. Where are you now?”
“I just finished work—”
“I have something to tell you, and I wanted you to be the first to know,” he interrupts, his tone urgent. You freeze at the sudden seriousness, sensing that something might be wrong.
“Okay… go ahead. I’m listening.”
You can almost picture him on the other end, catching his breath, trying to steady himself before speaking.
“There’s this producer—someone really skilled, who could be a huge help for my new music project. He’s interested in working with me,” Jaehyun says, his excitement barely contained.
“But?” you prompt, sensing there’s more.
“But the catch is… he’s only available tonight, and he wants to meet at a club.”
You feel a twinge of discomfort. In your mind, nothing good ever seems to come from such meetings, but you remind yourself that this is Jaehyun’s career. You’re not fully familiar with the music industry, so you want to hear him out before passing any judgment.
“I wanted you to be the first to know. And… to make sure you’re okay with it,” he adds softly. “I don’t want to do something you wouldn’t like.”
You pause, giving his words careful thought. Of course, you want Jaehyun to succeed and have every opportunity he deserves. But the idea of him going to a club, especially for a meeting, doesn’t sit well with you. Yet, you don’t want to be the one to hold him back.
“Jaehyun, I’m probably the last person you should be asking for… permission. I don’t know enough about your industry to judge.”
“I know,” he replies quickly. “But I just really wanted to share this with you. It means a lot to me.” There’s a vulnerability in his voice that tugs at your heart. “Come with me?”
“No,” you say gently. “This is something you need to handle on your own. I don’t want to be a distraction.”
“You’re never a distraction, Y/N,” he insists. Then, after a pause, he adds, “I’ve heard… things about this producer. That he has a reputation in clubs, especially with… girls. So, please, come with me. I don’t want any misunderstandings between us.”
You sigh, the weight of his request settling over you, knowing he wants you there as his anchor, as the one he trusts most.
After a pause, you finally agree to go with him. Jaehyun breathes a sigh of relief, thanking you over and over. Before you know it, he’s already arranging a driver to pick you up, wanting to make things as easy as possible.
When you arrive at the club, the noise, the flashing lights, and the press of bodies instantly overwhelm you. The crowd is thick, and you feel almost invisible as you enter. To everyone here, you’re just another face in the crowd, a nobody. Your eyes immediately scan the room until they land on Jaehyun, not far from where you are, deep in conversation with the producer.
Not wanting to intrude on his discussion, you make your way to the bar, ordering a drink, hoping it will settle your nerves. As you wait, you can’t help but overhear a few girls nearby, chatting animatedly about Jaehyun. You glance over, noticing their eyes are all trained on him.
“That’s Jaehyun, right? The one talking to the boss?” one of them says, her voice full of admiration.
“Yeah. He’s even more handsome in person,” another girl adds, twirling her hair. “And now that he’s connected? Total package.”
A sinking feeling settles in your chest as you realize these girls are part of the producer’s entourage—or perhaps for his amusement. Their conversation softens as they discuss “getting called in” to meet Jaehyun, clearly viewing him as the next big opportunity.
It doesn’t sit well with you, the way they’re admiring him only because of his rising reputation. They don’t see the Jaehyun you know—the one who spends late nights perfecting lyrics, who pours his heart into every melody. To them, he’s just the latest shiny thing, a stepping stone for their own ambitions.
For a moment, you feel an urge to step in, to somehow defend him, to tell them he’s worth so much more than shallow admiration. But you take a deep breath, reminding yourself that you’re here for him, not to let your insecurities get the best of you.
Finishing his conversation with the producer, Jaehyun glances around and his eyes light up when he spots you. His face breaks into a warm smile that melts away any remaining doubt you had about being here.
“Hey,” he says, his voice soft but full of warmth. “Thanks for coming. Really. It means a lot.”
“Of course,” you reply, smiling back at him. “I’m here for you.”
You both linger in a shared silence, the pounding music and chaos of the club fading into the background as you lock eyes. In this moment, it feels like you’re the only two people in the room.
“So, how did it go?” you finally ask, breaking the silence.
“I think it went well,” he says, unable to hide the pride in his smile. “But I don’t want to get ahead of myself.”
“A little confidence never hurt anyone,” you tease lightly.
Jaehyun laughs, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Maybe. Having you here makes everything better, like… I’m doing something right.”
Your heart felt like it had taken a hit, an arrow striking somewhere deep. You wanted to tell Jaehyun that the whole scene felt wrong from the start, that it made you uneasy. But seeing him genuinely happy, glowing with the promise of new opportunities, softened the edge of your discomfort. Maybe, for him, it was worth it.
Just then, the group of girls who had been watching him earlier made their way over, flashing practiced smiles.
“Hey, Jaehyun, right? We work with the producer,” one of them said, her voice dripping with charm.
Without hesitation, they closed in around him, the leader of the group resting a hand lightly on his arm.
You took a step back, feeling like an outsider in a place you never wanted to be, as Jaehyun exchanged polite words with the girls. But soon, their interactions became more forward—laughter too loud, hands lingering on his shoulder, his back, brushing against him as if they couldn’t resist touching him.
More girls nearby started to notice, whispering excitedly, “Isn’t that Jaehyun? I heard he’s working with the producer now.”
Their voices were filled with admiration and a hungry curiosity—the kind that surfaced only when someone had something others wanted. Slowly, more of them drifted over, until Jaehyun was nearly surrounded, their hands reaching out as if he were some prize. One girl even handed him her phone, asking for his number under the pretense of “future projects.” Jaehyun, always polite, tried to decline without offending her, but the group was insistent, treating him like a trophy.
A knot tightened in your stomach. It hurt more than you wanted to admit, watching them admire him for all the wrong reasons. And he, standing at the center of it all, looked caught off guard but also resigned, as if he’d been here before—surrounded by people who only saw his status.
Watching this unfold tore at you, and before you knew it, you turned and started to walk away from the loud party. The instant Jaehyun noticed, his expression shifted to concern. He excused himself from the throng of girls and quickly made his way over to you.
"Y/N, wait!" he called, gently grabbing your wrist. "What’s wrong? Talk to me."
"Everything, Jaehyun," you replied, voice tight. "You’re at the center of it all, surrounded by people who only see you as a symbol of power and connections. It just feels… wrong."
Jaehyun furrowed his brows, clearly caught off guard.
"I didn’t ask for this, Y/N," he said defensively. "I’m not trying to play some 'manly' role. This is just work—I told you. These girls work with the producer. I can't just push them away."
“Well, if this is part of your work, then maybe you don’t need me around,” you replied, trying to walk away again, but he tightened his grip on your wrist.
“Y/N, you’re being unreasonable now,” he said, frustration seeping into his tone.
You looked up, eyes fierce. “Maybe I am, Jaehyun, but that’s the problem. Men like you get placed on a pedestal, while women who speak out—women like me—get labeled as ‘too much.’ You may not see it, but this whole scene reinforces everything I stand against.”
A flash of offense crossed his face.
“So what am I supposed to do? Stop living my life because you don’t agree with how it looks? I’m not doing anything wrong, Y/N.”
“But you’re not doing anything either,” you replied, disappointment clear in your voice. “I guess this is where we clash, Jaehyun. I can’t accept this part of your life.”
You lowered your gaze, your heart aching with the weight of leaving him, but deep down, you felt he wasn’t fighting for anything real. His voice shook as he processed your words.
“So what now? Are you ending this over something I didn’t even know was an issue?”
“I can’t pretend it doesn’t bother me—just like it bothered you when you thought I was intruding on your privacy.”
Jaehyun looked down, the weight of the situation crashing over him. He seemed crushed, the reality of losing you sinking in.
“Do you… hate me?” he asked softly, his voice laden with sadness.
You felt the ache in his words, but you both needed this moment of honesty.
“Jaehyun, I could never hate you,” you replied, tears brimming in your eyes. “And that’s why this matters so much to me. I’m sorry, Jaehyun, but I have to go.”
You pulled away, leaving him standing there, alone in the crowd, as you walked out into the night. Leaving Jaehyun standing alone in the cold night air. A part of you wished he’d have reached out, tried to hold onto you—but the reality was stark and unyielding. With each step, your tears fell harder, the painful truth settling in: he wasn’t the kind of person who would fight to keep you.
Walking away, you pulled out your phone and dialed Aeri’s number.
“Aeri? Can you pick me up? Please, I can’t stand this anymore,” you choked out, voice thick with emotion.
But as your steps slowed, the realization hit: no one was coming right away. You tried to locate a nearby bus stop or a taxi, but you were unfamiliar with the area, so used to going everywhere with Jaehyun by your side. The weight of it all settled on your shoulders, and just as you were about to lose hope, you accidentally collided with someone.
“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, bowing your head, trying to hide your tear-streaked face.
“Oh, aren’t you Y/N? Are you okay?” you looked up to find Jeno standing before you, a mixture of concern and surprise on his face.
“Are you—” you stammered, wiping your tears with the back of your hand. “Jeno?”
“Yeah, Aeri sent me to pick you up instead. She said you needed it,” he replied, glancing back toward the club before focusing on you again. “What happened?”
You let out a sigh, feeling the familiar knot tighten in your chest. “It’s complicated.”
Jeno’s brows knitted together, a genuine empathy in his expression. But sensing your reluctance, he didn’t press further.
“Come on, let’s get you out of here,” he offered softly. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. Aeri’s worried.”
Grateful for his calm presence, you nodded and followed him to his car, parked under the dim glow of the streetlights.
As he drove, Jeno glanced at you, his tone gentle but thoughtful. “If you need to talk about it… I know a bit about you and Jaehyun.”
You managed a small smile. “Aeri filled you in, huh?”
He nodded, smiling back. “Jaehyun can be… a lot sometimes.”
Looking out the window at the passing lights, you swallowed the lump in your throat. “We fought. Over something that just… doesn’t seem to matter to him.”
Jeno’s expression softened.
“If it matters to you, then it’s worth something. When someone’s in the spotlight like he is, sometimes it takes a while for them to understand the impact of their actions.” He looked at you, a steady reassurance in his eyes.
“Give it time. If he truly cares, he’ll come to see why it’s important to you. You deserve someone who’ll stand by what you believe in.”
“Thanks, Jeno,” you whispered, grateful for his steady support.
--
“Y/N, can you help me with this?” your colleague asked, passing over yet another project folder.
“Sure, just put it aside with the other folders,”
You barely look up as you tried to focus on the spreadsheet in front of you. Each day new assignment seemed to pile higher on your desk. Regardless, you still work like crazy to the point it seems like you wanted the pile of work.
Aeri hovered nearby, her expression laced with concern. “Are you… okay?” she asked gently.
“Yeah, I’m okay. Just getting things done before audit season.”
“That’s it, y/n. It’s not even the audit season yet, you should take it slow. You’ll be worn out before the audit season”
You just scoof her off, saying you’re not the type to get tired easily. But as she walked away, you felt the weight of it all pressing down. Taking a deep breath, you glanced at your phone, but the screen remained empty.
That night, you decided to take a break and invited Aeri over to your apartment for drinks. She arrived with her boyfriend, Jeno, who brought along a few snacks and his usual easygoing smile. The three of you settled around the living room, drinks in hand, with laughter filling the space as the night went on.
You’ve been trying to keep up with Aeri teasing Jeno and revealing funny stories from the office, sipping from your glass and smiling at the right moments, but your mind kept wandering off. At one point, Aeri gave you a knowing look.
“Hey, are you really okay?” she asked, nudging you.
“Yeah, just… you know, work’s been a lot lately. I’m probably just exhausted.”
“I told you, you would run out energy before the audit. You should be more gentle to yourself”,
You looked into the can of beer in your hand, it was empty. Somehow it reminded you how you’ve been feeling lately, despite the tons of work.
“I should have. I thought the load if work would fill up my mind, my time. But now, I don’t feel anything”,
Aeri and Jeno was suprised at your confession. You had always seem to have your life together, she wasn’t expecting you to rant out just like.
“Y/N”, Jeno unsure of how to address the situation. “Hm, are you— hm— drunk? Should we call it a night?”
You chuckled, how miserable you have been trying to maintain the image of indepent woman that now you were unsure do people that you seriously when your not mentally unstable.
“I must be a bit tipsy—“,
“Your waiting for him, aren’t you?”, Aeri interrupted, which took you by suprises. “I can tell by how happy you are with him”
Your eyes slowly turn into glass without you realising as Aeri continue.
“That now, when he left, he took it with him”,
You slowly look at her. Aeri had always been cheerful, lifting up the mood that she might seem immature sometimes. But in the moment, you realise that she must have been masking her pain.
Just like how all of us have been doing.
“Yes, and I’m missing him too much”.
Aeri slowly scotch closer to you, wrapping her arms around you.
“It’s okay, y/n. You don’t need to tough it out for now. There’s nothing wrong about it”, as she whisper to you while embracing you.
Her words cracked something inside you. A tear slid down your cheek before you could stop it. You finally let the tears flow, the concern and understanding in her words made realized she’d noticed everything you thought you’d hidden.
Aeri wraps her arms tighter around you. Just like you, she had her own struggles masked by smiles and laughter, and for the first time, you both let yourselves be vulnerable together, acknowledging the pain you’d all been carrying alone. Jeno placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, saying nothing, letting you both just be.
Unlike you, Jaehyun headed to the club that night, on his way to meet the producer to discuss new ideas for his songs. He had been working with the producer for a few weeks now, and while Jaehyun appreciated the producer's vision and creativity, he was growing impatient with the slow progress. It didn’t help that the producer seemed wrapped up in the nightlife scene, filling his evenings with club activities that left Jaehyun restless, wishing he could focus solely on the music instead.
Just like you, he was starting to feel worn out.
“Hey, Haeun,” Jaehyun greeted a woman who had approached him early on, soon after hearing he’d be collaborating with the producer.
She smiled back, a faint, knowing look in her eyes. After weeks of politely declining advances from the women who had initially surrounded him, the interest had mostly faded. One by one, they’d lost interest, sensing that Jaehyun wasn’t interested in mixing business with pleasure—or perhaps realizing his connection with the producer wasn’t as social as they’d hoped.
“Looking for the producer?” she asked casually.
“Yeah.” Jaehyun ordered a drink, taking a sip as he looked around. “Do you know where he is?”
“Oh, you know him,” she replied, sliding her hand subtly onto his lap. “He’s probably just handling some ‘work’ stuff. He’ll be here in a minute.”
Jaehyun resisted the urge to pull away, the casual touch a reminder of how he’d been drawn into this world—a place he never truly fit into. His mind drifted back to a different kind of night, quieter and far from the flashing lights and unfamiliar faces. And as much as he tried to forget.
His mind drifted to you.
Jaehyun gently removed Haeun's hand from his lap, hoping to diffuse the situation without causing a scene.
"Sorry, Haeun, but I’m just here to talk business." he said, keeping his voice calm,"
Her smile faltered, her expression twisting with embarrassment and irritation. She leaned closer, her voice dropping to a challenging tone.
“Oh, come on, Jaehyun,” she said, her tone laced with annoyance. “You’re really just here to work? Don’t act so above it all.”
When he didn’t respond, she moved in even closer, pressing herself against him as though determined to wear down his resistance. Jaehyun felt his patience thinning; he pushed her gently but firmly aside, realizing that his polite refusals weren’t going to get through to her.
“Look, Haeun,” he said, keeping his voice steady but his tone sharp, “I meant what I said. I’m not interested.”
The flash of anger in her eyes was unmistakable, her pride clearly bruised.
“You think you’re better than everyone here?” she sneered, her voice loud enough to draw a few curious glances from nearby. “Or are you just here to use the producer and then leave, like none of us matter?”
Jaehyun took a deep breath, steadying his frustration. He missed you—missed the clarity and grounding you brought, and for a split second, he felt the sting of how right you’d been about all of this.
“I’m here for my music,” he replied, his tone measured and cool. “If you don’t get that, it’s best you leave me alone.”
Without another glance, Jaehyun turned and made his way out of the club, distancing himself from her and the crowd. He could feel the weight of their stares trailing behind him, but he kept his gaze forward. The entire encounter had left him feeling hollow, revealing the shallow undercurrents he’d ignored for too long.
Outside, under the quiet stretch of the night sky, Jaehyun searched for solace in the calm after the chaos. He pulled out his phone, his thumb hesitating over your contact. He wanted to call you, to hear your voice and find comfort in the familiarity he’d pushed away. For a long moment, he debated it, the thought lingering like a lifeline in the silence.
But his pride held him back. He’d already felt it bruised enough tonight, and the painful reminder of the distance he’d let grow between you weighed heavy on his heart—a reminder of what he’d lost and what he might never get back.
--
Jaehyun wandered to a street bar near his place, settling into a quiet corner with a bottle and a glass. The night air was thick with the hum of city life, a familiar background to his quiet unraveling. He glanced at his phone, fingers hovering over a message he’d hesitated to send for too long.
With a steadying breath, he finally typed to the producer:
I don’t think this is working out. I’ll need to step back from our project.
He hit send, feeling the release like a drop off a tightrope, his resolve firm. He poured himself another drink, the burn of the alcohol both grounding and numbing.
His hands went through his hair. In the moments of disp, his mind went too much on you. Thinking how much he need your warmth from the silence.
He lifted his head from the glass just as he noticed a familiar face across the bar, one that brought an instant sense of nostalgia.
“Jaehyun?” The voice was warm and surprised, and when he looked up, he was met with the wide grin of an old high school friend, Minseok.
“oh— minseok ah!”, they both of them reach out for a handshake as they bump their chest together.
“what are your doing here alone?”
“just trying to drain day the day. how about you?”,
“why are you doing it alone? you should drink it some, let’s drink together”,
They bith laughed as Minseok sat down with Jaehyun. They quickly catch up and laughing over shared memories. The comfort of familiarity soothed some of Jaehyun's earlier bitterness, and as the drinks flowed.
“So what are you up to now? The last time we talked, you were in SNU doing music”, Jaehyun asked.
“Well,” Minseok replied with a small smile, “I’ve started producing now. If you’re looking for someone to work with, I’d be honored to work with you.”
Jaehyun’s eyes widened. “You’re producing now?”
“Yeah, Ive been producing for quite some time now”,
Eventually, Jaehyun shared what had been weighing on him—the fallout with the producer, the frustrations of the past few weeks, and how he felt he was losing himself in the industry.
Minseok nodded, sympathy in his gaze.
“I get it. It happens you know? Sometimes, people even forget why they’re doing what they love in the first place.”
Jaehyun sighed, swirling his drink.
“Yeah, I just didn’t expect it to feel this empty”.
“Well, come to my studio” Minseok replied with pouring into his glass, “maybe I can help.”
“Well, come to my studio,” Minseok replied, pouring another drink. “Maybe I can help.”
A spark of hope flickered in Jaehyun's chest, something he hadn't felt in ages—something he had lost in the sterile demands of his previous producer.
“I’d actually like that… a lot.”
--
The next few weeks passed in a blur. Jaehyun threw himself into his music, each day dissolving into the next as he filled the empty hours with endless melodies and late-night recording sessions. Minseok’s studio became his second home, its walls absorbing every failed attempt, every breakthrough, and every quiet moment of doubt.
One evening, Jaehyun headed to the company building for a round of final checks on his solo album. His body was tired, but his mind was relentlessly driven. As he walked past the studios, he nearly bumped into Jeno, who looked like he was the last one out after practice. Jaehyun’s face lit up, grateful for the unexpected company and a break from his own thoughts.
"Hyung!" Jeno greeted with a wide grin, pulling him into a quick hug. "Are you here working on your solo album?"
"Yeah," Jaehyun replied with a tired smile. "Just wrapping things up, trying to balance it with the group’s schedule."
Jeno chuckled, nodding knowingly.
"Sounds like you’re living in the studio these days."
"Yeah… but my friend's been helping a lot."
"That’s good. You could use the support."
Jaehyun hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck. Finally, he broke the silence.
"Hey, Jeno… have you seen Y/N around lately?"
Here’s an enhanced and corrected version:
There was no hiding the fact that Jeno was the one who took you home that night. When news broke of him being spotted with a woman in his car, rumours quickly started to swirl. Although SM Entertainment promptly cleared things up, stating that Jeno was simply helping out a friend, the speculation had already spread far and wide.
Jeno’s expression softened. He knew this question would come sooner or later.
"We hung out a few nights ago," he said, choosing his words carefully. "She’s… well, she’s been busy with work. The overtime's wearing her down a bit."
"That's good to know", Jaehyun's shoulders relaxed slightly, but there was a flicker of something else—regret, maybe.
Thoughts of you had crept into his mind more than he wanted to admit, but he still felt the weight of their last encounter at the club. The harsh words exchanged, her disappointment in him—it all lingered, making it hard to reach out.
"She's changed a bit," Jeno continued, his tone gentle. "But she's still Y/N… maybe just a little more guarded."
Jaehyun looked away, clenching his jaw. He hadn’t reached out, and not for lack of wanting to. After the fight, he couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe she didn’t want to see him anymore, that maybe he’d crossed a line that couldn’t be erased.
"Hyung, you should reach out to her. I think she’s waiting for you, even if she wouldn’t say it."
Jaehyun’s chest tightened, a surge of longing mixed with uncertainty. The thought of her waiting gave him a sliver of hope, but the memory of her disappointment held him back.
“Maybe…” Jaehyun murmured, half to himself.
But he knew he’d have to decide soon—before the silence between them became a wall neither could cross.
Jaehyun’s thoughts churned as he walked back to his car, Jeno’s words echoing in his mind: "I think she’s waiting for you." He replayed the last fight in his head—the hurt in your eyes, the way you turned and walked away, and the silence that had followed ever since. Every part of him wanted to see you, but his pride and guilt had held him back. Still, the hope that you might be waiting was enough to push him forward.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he decided he couldn’t go another day without seeing you.
Exhausted from another late night at the office, you stepped out into the chilly evening air, adjusting your bag on your shoulder. Fatigue clung to you, making every step feel heavier. All you wanted was to go home and collapse into bed.
But as you descended the office steps, a familiar figure caught your eye—Jaehyun.
The sight of him only reignited the simmering anger you'd been trying to bury since your last argument. Without a second glance, you walked right past him, clutching your bag tightly. He blinked, briefly thrown off, before quickly following you, trying to keep pace.
"Y/N… can we talk?" he called, his voice almost pleading.
"We have nothing to talk about, Jaehyun," you replied, your gaze fixed straight ahead.
"Please… I need you to listen to me," he insisted, desperation edging into his tone.
"I already got your message, Jaehyun."
He frowned, confusion flashing across his face.
"What message, Y/N? I never even reached out to you yet."
"Exactly," you shot back, bitterness lacing your words. You stopped abruptly, finally turning to look at him, eyes cold. "No reply is a reply, don’t you get it?"
He fell silent, visibly taken aback by the weight of your words. You could see the hurt flicker across his face, but you refused to let it soften your resolve.
"Since when did you start seeing silence as a bad sign for us?" he murmured, searching your face. "We’ve shared so many moments in silence… yet I always felt connected to you. I thought you understood that."
You shook your head, feeling the frustration bubble over. "This is different, Jaehyun. You don’t understand—"
"Then make me understand!" he interrupted, his voice rising with urgency. "Let me in, Y/N. I know I should’ve reached out, and I'm trying to make up for it now. I was caught up with my schedule, the solo album, everything… but that’s not an excuse."
He took a shaky breath, his shoulders sagging.
"I'm just… shocked that my silence hurt you this much. I got so used to feeling your love, even in quiet moments, that I took it for granted. I thought you knew how much you mean to me without me having to say it."
You stood there, caught between shock and confusion, unsure whether to feel angry or softened by his words. He looked down, his gaze falling to the ground, as if ashamed.
"Jaehyun," you started slowly, "I think… I think I’m a bit lost, too."
He squeezed his eyes shut for a brief moment, before looking back up at you, a flicker of vulnerability in his gaze.
"I like you, Y/N. I really do. And the thought of living without you… I don’t think I can do it anymore."
The raw honesty in his words left you speechless, your emotions tangled in a knot you couldn’t quite unravel. Your mind and heart seemed to be waging a silent war, each pulling you in a different direction.
"Jaehyun," you finally whispered, barely able to find your voice. "I… I can't give you an answer right now."
He nodded slowly.
"I understand. And that's okay. Really. You can keep living your life, just as you are. But… if you ever find your way back to me along the way, I'll be here, waiting."
The two of you held each other's gaze, a shared softness settling over the tension. For a moment, it felt like the world had quieted around you, leaving just the fragile connection lingering between you. After a beat, he spoke again, his voice gentle.
"Let's have dinner together. I can’t bear seeing you like this. Let me at least make sure you’re okay tonight."
You hesitated, but the sincerity in his eyes made it hard to refuse.
A short while later, you found yourselves seated at a quiet, tucked-away street bar. The dim lighting cast a soft, golden glow over the tables, creating a small bubble of warmth around you both. As you sat across from him, waiting for your food, an awkward silence settled between you.
“Thank you,” he finally said, breaking the silence. “For agreeing to this. I know things have been… complicated.”
“It’s just dinner, Jaehyun,” you murmured, but even as you said it, you both knew it was more than that.
“I know. But it’s been a while since we’ve done this—just sat together. I missed it.”, you stared at him, disbelief crossing your face.
"So, what made you finally reach out to me?"
The question seemed to catch him off guard. He shifted, his fingers tracing patterns on the table, clearly thrown by your directness. But you held his gaze, waiting, wanting nothing but the truth. Finally, he exhaled, as if releasing a breath he’d been holding for too long.
"Jeno told me about you," he admitted, his voice low.
Your eyes narrowed slightly, a mix of curiosity and surprise tugging at you. "What did he say?"
"He told me how you’ve been working late, how you've become more reserved, and… how you were hurting. And I knew I couldn’t just sit by and let that happen—not when I’m part of the reason."
His words hung heavy in the air, raw and unfiltered. For the first time, you saw a flicker of vulnerability in him, a glimpse of the struggle he’d been hiding beneath the image he showed to the world. You took a slow, deep breath, feeling a pang in your chest as you watched him.
"At first, I questioned everything you said during the argument, and I let my ego get in the way. I didn’t want to admit that maybe… maybe I was the one who let things get this far. I thought… maybe you’d be better off without me."
The honesty in his voice chipped away at something inside you, softening the wall you'd built around your heart, brick by brick. After a quiet moment, he spoke up again, even softer.
“I’ve missed you, Y/N. More than I realized, honestly.”
The sincerity in his eyes held you there, and for a brief moment, the walls you’d built around yourself began to soften. Just then, the waiter arrived with your drinks, placing them carefully on the table before slipping away. You took a small sip, feeling the warmth of the drink calm some of the tension lingering between you.
"Jaehyun," you began softly, choosing your words carefully. "I really like you. I like you a lot, maybe even more than I should," you confessed, and you saw his eyes light up, a flicker of hope sparking within him. But you quickly continued, grounding him.
"But I can't just jump into your arms because of that. Not when there's still a part of you—something in you—that I’m struggling to accept."
Jaehyun listened intently, his gaze unwavering, absorbing every word with an intensity that made your heart ache. He nodded, acknowledging the weight of what you were saying.
"I need time," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "Time to think this through carefully, to be sure that I can handle everything that comes with loving you."
He took a deep breath, his expression softening with understanding. "I respect that. Take all the time you need. Just… let me show you that I can be better, that I can be someone worth waiting for."
The sincerity in his promise warmed something deep within you, a small glimmer of hope settling in your chest.
"Let's do that".
--
After that night, Jaehyun took your words to heart. He didn’t push or demand more than you were ready to give; instead, he let his actions do the talking. He slowly made his presence a comforting constant in your life. Despite the walls you’d built around your heart, you felt them weakening.
He started with the small things. He’d text you after your long workdays, asking how you were holding up or sharing a lighthearted story to lift your spirits. Occasionally, he’d wait for you outside your office building after a hectic day, bringing you to a nearby café or restaurant, where you’d chat about work, life, and everything in between over the meal. He’d simply sit and listen, his attention fully focused on you, as though you were the center of his world. In those moments, you felt truly loved.
But then came the grander gestures—the ones that truly took you by surprise and reminded you just how serious he was about making up for lost time.
On one of his overseas trips, he sent you a carefully wrapped package. Inside was a small, hand-carved music box with a delicate melody that played when you turned the handle. Alongside it was a note in his familiar handwriting.
“For when I can’t be there in person, I hope this brings you a bit of comfort. - Jaehyun”
The small gift warmed your heart, and you could almost picture him browsing through shops, trying to find something that would mean something to you. As the days passed, you found yourself reaching for the music box on nights when you missed him more than you wanted to admit.
One evening, he invited you out to dinner, insisting it was just a casual meal. But when you arrived, you realized he’d gone out of his way to reserve a table at a restaurant you’d mentioned in passing, one you’d wanted to visit for ages. The thoughtfulness behind each gesture made it clear—he was listening, paying attention to the details you sometimes didn’t even remember sharing.
After dinner, the night felt lighter, as though a fragile peace had settled between you. As you both walked out of the restaurant, Jaehyun glanced at you, his expression hopeful but cautious.
“Would you… like to come over?” he asked softly. “I could show you some of the tracks from the album.”
“Sure,” you replied with a gentle smile.
He led you to his place, a quiet but cozy apartment just like how you remember it was. As you entered his place, you immediately noticed the shelves lined with LPs which was new since the last time you visit, each one carefully organized. Jaehyun led you to the collection, his face lighting up as he pulled a few records out to show you.
"These are some of my favorites," he explained, flipping through the collection with an easy familiarity. He held up his own LP, his album, with a hint of pride and vulnerability in his eyes.
"Have you heard my album?" he asked, his tone soft, almost uncertain.
You shook your head. “Not like this for sure. I was… waiting for the right moment, I guess.”
You hesitated, glancing at the LP in his hands. “Honestly… I think I was a little scared to listen deeply,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jaehyun’s brows furrowed, a look of gentle curiosity on his face.
“Scared? Why?”
You sighed, searching for the right words.
“I was afraid I’d hear… parts of you that you’d given to someone else. Your songs comes from a place of real emotion. The way you write, the way you sing—I could tell.” You sighed, searching for the right words. “I didn’t know if I was ready to face how much you loved someone else.”
For a moment, silence filled the space between you, broken only by the soft hum of the record player. Jaehyun looked at you, his expression shifting from surprise to something tender and understanding. He gently placed the LP onto the player, setting the needle down carefully.
“Then let me share it with you now. These songs… it’s a part of my journey, but it doesn’t define where my heart is now,” he said with his gaze soft on you.
He gestured for you to sit on the couch, and you settled in beside him, a comfortable closeness forming as you listened. The gentle strains of his voice surrounded you, and in that moment, you felt the walls between you begin to melt away. With each track, you could feel his heart and effort poured into the music—every beat, every melody felt like a glimpse into parts of him he’d never fully shared before. You found yourself leaning in, absorbed by the rawness in each song.
“How does it feel?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, as if not to disrupt the music or the moment.
“Feels like I should have listened to it sooner,” forming a smile at your face as you turned to him.
A quiet joy softened his face, and he settled back into the couch, content. The music continued to flow around you both. As the last notes faded, you slowly got up from the couch. Moving over to the record player, you reached down to adjust the LP, prepared to reset it for another play.
Just as you turned around, ready to ask if he wanted to listen again. But when you turned, you found him leaning back against the cushions, his eyes closed, his breathing slow and steady—fast asleep.
A faint smile tugged at the corners of your lips. For all the intensity and energy he had shared with you tonight, he looked peaceful now, almost childlike, as though he’d finally allowed himself to rest. You walked over quietly, taking a seat next to him, your gaze lingering on his sleeping face.
“He must be really tired”, you thought.
In the silence, you found yourself tracing the memories of every little thing he’d done. His thoughtfulness, his attentiveness—it all added up to something deeper, a love that went beyond words. Each one making it harder for you to keep your walls up.
After a while, you entered a room quietly to reach for a blanket, the dim light casting soft shadows over everything. As you looked around, your eyes landed on a small picture frame on the bedside table. The photo was faced down, but on the back, in Jaehyun's familiar handwriting.
Love.
Curiosity tingled in your chest, and with a hesitant hand, you reached out and flipped the photo over. Your breath caught when you saw the image—a Polaroid of you, taken at the day you promised to tell your feelings when you held in his. You remembered the day, the laughter, the way he’d been looking at you just before he snapped the picture. It was one of those moments you didn’t think he’d remember, yet here it was, tucked close to where he rested.
You carefully draped the blanket over him, tucking it around his shoulders. But as you leaned forward, Jaehyun stirred, his eyes fluttering open, a bit disoriented as he took in his surroundings.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to fall asleep—” he mumbled, his voice laced with sleep, eyes blinking up at you.
You remained silent, your emotions laid bare by the tears that still clung to your lashes. His gaze softened as he noticed them, his brow furrowing in quiet concern.
“Are you… okay?” he asked gently, his hand lifting to brushing your arm to comfort.
You closed your eyes briefly, gathering the courage to voice what had been lingering in your mind. When you finally looked at him, your voice was barely a whisper.
“Can I… can I kiss you?”
For a moment, silence filled the room, his expression shifting from surprise to something deeper, something almost vulnerable. He leaned in closer, giving you the answer, the distance between you dissolving until your lips met in a soft, tender kiss—one that seemed to carry everything unsaid between you both.
As you pulled away, he looked at you, his gaze searching.
“What happened?”, his voice barely audible, as if afraid to break the fragile moment between you.
Without a word, you reached into your pocket and pulled out the polaroid you had found in his room. Jaehyun’s eyes widened slightly, his breath catching as he realized what you’d found. He opened his mouth to say something, but no words came. Instead, he looked at you with a vulnerability he rarely showed, his gaze filled with emotions he had kept hidden.
“You kept this,” you whispered, your voice wavering as you traced the edges of the photo. “All this time… you kept this.”
He nodded, a small, almost shy smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
“I couldn’t let it go,” he admitted softly, fingers brushing over the polaroid. “It reminded me of what I couldn’t say out loud.”
Tears pricked your eyes again, but this time, they were mixed with the warmth of understanding, the realization of how deeply he felt, even if he hadn’t always known how to show it.
Reaching into your bag, you pulled out a polaroid—a picture of Jaehyun. You held it in your hand, feeling its familiar weight. On the back, in your handwriting, was the word Love, mirroring the same word on his photo of you.
Finally, you handed it to him, and Jaehyun’s eyes softened as he realized you had kept this silent connection close. Then, without warning, he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a tight embrace. You could feel the steady beat of his heart against your own, his warmth surrounding you like a shield.
“I love you,” he whispered into your hair, his voice filled with a quiet conviction. “I’m sorry it took me so long to tell you, to show you.”
The words you had longed to hear settled into the quiet spaces of your heart, filling the emptiness you hadn’t even realized was there.
“I love you too, Jaehyun,” you murmured back, feeling the weight of your shared confessions settle between you like a promise.
With a soft smile, he pulled you closer. His arms hold you securely as you rest against his chest. The room was filled with a comforting silence, broken only by the steady rhythm of his breathing. Gradually, your eyes grew heavy, the exhaustion of the night and the emotional weight finally catching up with you.
With one last glance at each other, you let yourselves drift off, content and safe in each other's arms. For the first time, neither of you felt the need to say anything more—everything had already been said in the way you held each other, two hearts finally at rest.
--
Two years later, you both found yourselves on a long-awaited vacation in Japan, a trip you’d talked about countless times. After Jaehyun’s military service, you were grateful for the time he had before diving back into his schedule. And for you, ever since the break you took during your suspension, you’ve improved tremendously at work. Recognizing the benefit of rest, your company has even begun encouraging employees to take breaks now and then.
Now, riding the train through a breathtaking winter landscape, you both watched in awe as snow blanketed the world outside, each flake catching the soft, wintry light. The quiet rhythm of the tracks provided the perfect backdrop, bringing a sense of peace to all the hard work that had led you here.
You leaned closer to the window, mesmerized by the beauty—the trees dusted with snow, rooftops transformed into sugar-coated sculptures, the whole world cloaked in a serene white glow. It felt like a scene from a dream.
Jaehyun, watching you with a soft smile, felt warmth rise in his chest as he took in your wonderstruck expression. Suddenly, drawn to the moment, he leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to your cheek. You turned, a little startled, only to find him inches away, his gaze warm and steady.
“That was a surprise,” you laughed, cheeks warming as he smiled back, his eyes shining.
The train eventually stopped at a small station, and Jaehyun led you toward a quaint post office nearby. He’d planned this little detour—this spot was known for its “love letter” tradition, where visitors could write and send letters to each other that would arrive years later. Jaehyun handed you a pen and paper, a mischievous glint in his eyes, as he nodded toward a desk set up in the corner.
“Let’s write something for each other,” Jaehyun suggested, he handed you a pen and a fresh sheet of paper, gesturing toward a small desk in the corner.
“Okay, no peeking, alright?” you teased.
Jaehyun smiled, a playful glint flashing across his face. He nodded, giving you space as you sat down at the desk. The pen in your hand felt heavier than it should have as if the words you were about to write were more than just ink on paper.
Both of you wrote in silence, the soft scratch of pens filling the room. You tried to focus on your words, but your mind kept returning to Jaehyun. There was so much you wanted to say, so much you hadn’t yet admitted. But for now, this letter would be the way you could say it without speaking.
When you finished, you folded the paper carefully, sealing your thoughts inside. You watched as Jaehyun did the same. He didn’t look at you, but there was something about the way he held his letter that made your heart race.
He looked up, his eyes meeting yours. The playful energy between you had shifted, replaced by something deeper, something more serious. Without a word, Jaehyun reached out, taking your letter from your hands before handing you his.
"You look serious," you remarked, a soft hint of curiosity in your voice.
For a moment, you stared at the letter in your hands, uncertain, feeling the weight of the moment settle around you. Jaehyun’s voice broke the silence, softer than before, yet filled with an unmistakable certainty.
“I think we both know this is more than just a letter,” he said, his gaze unwavering.
You hesitated for a moment, then gently unfolded the paper. To your surprise, it wasn't the long, elaborate love letter you had expected from him, but a simple, heartfelt message. As you read the words carefully, a deep emotion stirred within you, each sentence carrying more weight than the last, settling in your chest like a promise you never thought you'd receive.
"Y/N, let me love you forever. Marry me"
Your heart stopped as you looked up at him, eyes wide with disbelief. There he was, the man who’d become everything to you, standing before you with all of his heart laid bare in front of you.
Jaehyun slowly took your hand, his other hand still holding his own letter, his voice barely a whisper. “Will you marry me?”
For a moment, the world seemed to stand still. The air around you felt thick with the weight of his words, his quiet question hanging between you like the most fragile thing in the universe. Your heart pounded in your chest, too fast to comprehend, too full to contain.
You stared at him, your breath catching in your throat as you looked into his eyes—those eyes that had been with you through everything, the eyes that had seen you at your best and your worst. And now, they were waiting for you to answer, waiting for you to take that leap with him.
“Yes,” you whispered, your voice trembling with emotion. “Yes, Jaehyun. I’ll marry you.”
The words felt like they had been waiting a lifetime to escape your lips, and the moment they did, a wave of warmth and relief washed over you both. Jaehyun’s face lit up with an overwhelming joy, his eyes sparkling, as though a burden he didn’t even realize he’d been carrying had finally been lifted.
Without a word, he pulled you into his arms, holding you close, his embrace tightening as if to make sure you were real, that this was really happening. You felt the steady beat of his heart against yours, and for the first time, everything felt perfectly aligned, as though the world had conspired to bring you both to this very moment.
Jaehyun pulled back just enough to look at you, his hand cupping your cheek tenderly. His voice, soft and full of emotion, slipped from his lips. “I love you. I’ll love you forever, Y/N.”
And as he kissed you, gently and full of promise, you knew that this was only the beginning of the beautiful life you would share together.
-- ˚˖𓍢ִ໋`🌿:✧˚.📷⋆𖧧 --
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lost-in-fandoms · 3 days ago
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Hello. Dick piercing anon here. Still obsessed weeks later. This has changed me. I think about it over and over again. Thank you everyone for these impure thoughts.
Also:
The diamond sits nice and sparkly in his dick. It's the first time he's wearing it and it makes him feel pretty in a weird way. It's so delicate, a flash of light caught in the mirror. He hopes Max loves the way it looks on him. Daniel loves how it looks on him. But he loves even more that it's something Max bought for him because he thinks Daniel is the best thing on Earth after racing.
Daniel pulls up his underwear and then his suit (the green one because it makes him look good and it makes Max look at him with hungry podium eyes). It's his first time in the paddock after his retirement and he's a bit nervous but he promised Max he would be there. It's Max's birthday and he wants to make Max happy.
(He always wants to make Max happy, it's the thing. It's insane how he feels about him, loving Max is like racing again, flying on the straight, not thinking about braking until the last moment. )
Max wins.
And he has a birthday party after. Daniel goes with him and they dance, a bit drunk, and Max is handsy because winning makes him feel horny and Daniel in a suit makes him hot in a lot of ways.
(Max can't stop touching Daniel. He doesn't stop in the party, he doesn't stop in the elevator, he doesn't stop when they're in their room).
'Hey, champion', says Daniel, his words smashed against Max's cheek, full of kisses and love-yous. 'I have something for you. Let me- Let me show you, baby.'
And Max whines a little because he doesn't want to stop touching Daniel but he goes down on the bed and stares at Daniel's hand, unbuckling his own belt, and then-
The underwear goes down and Max's brain stops working because there it is.
So little, so pretty. A beautiful spark on Daniel's dick. Just for him. Just for him. Just for him. Max's on his knees just a second later, his hands finding their place on Daniel's hips.
'Daniel, please', says Max.
Daniel's fingers on his hair, pulling just a bit.
'Yeah, baby', Daniel's voice trembling a little.
Max kisses the diamond, kisses his dick. Closes his eyes before sucking the head on his mouth. Daniel's fingers pull a little bit more.
'Max', his voice rough. 'Maxmaxmax'
(Maybe, he thinks, just lost in the sensation of Max's mouth on him, maybe I should buy a diamond ring for him).
anon this was one of the first things i saw when i woke up and im still screaming in my head
this is incredible I'm obsessed with YOU
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figurantedefilme · 3 days ago
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marry me — sam winchester.
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pairing: sam winchester x gn!reader
summary: you woke up and decided that you should marry sam as soon as you could.
cw: just fluff, very cliché, no use of s/n, established relationship, brief mention of canon-typical violence, thoughts about marriage, hugs, kisses, use of nicknames by sam and reader (honey, darling, baby, my love), small appearance by dean, poorly edited.
a/n: okay, this was VERY short, i'm still learning how to write this kind of stuff, i'm not very creative, but i needed to write this to take a weight off my shoulders, i loved so much this shit with sammy ;(( sorry if there are any grammar mistakes, english isn't my first language!! enjoy ;)
(ps: im reposting this because i moved blogs!!)
— send me an request!! <3
It was a day like any other after a long hunt. You woke up, Sam was sleeping peacefully next to you in the shared room. You looked at the time on the clock; it was 7am.
Sam was half hugging you, one of his big arms under your back, another hand on your waist, one of his legs folded between yours, the sunlight coming through the gaps in the curtain, illuminating his face in such an incredible way, and you could see a small smile on his face, he really was at peace. You loved it when he slept so well like that, no nightmares, no worries transmitted on his face, just the peace of a good night's sleep.
You thought a lot about it, about how much you wanted to wake up every day with Sam by your side, like, have a life with him, maybe even retire from hunting, get married, a house further away from the city, or even live in the bunker, it didn't matter, you just wanted to be with him until the end of your lives, be his forever, and have him for yourself too.
Sam started to wake up, a big smile on his face when he saw you there beside him. "Good morning, honey." he said in that sleepy voice. "Marry me." You said simply, admiring your boyfriend's beauty, having barely woken up.
"What did you say, darling?" He turned to the side, propping himself up on his elbow to look into your eyes. "I said marry me, my love." You smiled what was probably the biggest smile of your entire life, then leaned in and kissed Sam on the nose.
"Wait," he sat down on the bed, and you followed his action, sitting in front of him. "What's wrong?" You saw how the expression on his face changed, something like surprise, with a hint of confusion. "Are you serious, baby?" He said, taking your hands and looking deep into your soul, he really wanted to know that.
"I've never said anything so serious in my life, Samuel," you replied, clasping your hands around his.
"Oh, of course I want to marry you, in fact, just wait here." He let go of her hands and turned to get out of bed, and went towards the dresser in the room, opened one of the drawers, and from the bottom, took out a red velvet box. "I've been planning this for a while, I wanted to wait until we had a day off and I could take you out to dinner and do it in a more romantic way."
He knelt in front of the bed, opened the little box, and reached out to take yours, you sat on the edge of the bed, almost crying and held his hand. "Do you want to marry me too?" He smiled big, and you simply started to cry. "Oh my god, yes yes, please, yes."
"I should be the one asking you please, you are the most important person in my life, and I would do anything to protect you from all this shit we keep fighting, just to have you for myself forever, my love." He took off the ring and put it on your finger, kissing your hand. He stood up and hugged you, wiping your tears.
"Oh, I love you so much." You said, and began to shower his face with kisses.
"What's that noise here? Who's crying?" Dean appeared at the door, wearing his robe with a cup of coffee in one hand.
"I did it, Dean." Sam said looking at his brother, he held his wrist and pointed his hand so Dean could see the ring.
"Uh, finally, Sammy, I'm so happy for you." He said with a smile that quickly faded. "But can you stop making so much noise? It's only 7am, thanks." Then he turned and closed the door.
"Typical Dean," you said, laughing.
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hford0311 · 2 days ago
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In my silence I adored you
*Avenger's Tower Fanfic*
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader
Hey girl, what-cha doing down there? Dancing alone while I live right above you; I can hear your music playing; I can feel your body swaying
It didn't take a super soldier to hear the music that came out of your apartment. However, the one above you did understand the lyrics, not like most of the others that lived in the tower. He didn't mind it, sometimes, it became a soothing thing when the nightmares woke him up. The vibrations of the music and lyrics gave him was a micro-confirmation that he was no longer in the Soviet Union. No longer trapped under any ice.
"Okay, but how come you can't go one day without it?" Sam asked about your music during breakfast. You shrugged, "I have my space. It mostly stays in my space. Just like Redwing." Bucky snickered. Sam slightly aggressively turned towards his best friend-enemy man. "You live above her! What are your thoughts?" Bucky was slightly started by the question. "I-I don't mind it." You stuck your tongue out at Sam, putting your dishes in sink, and walked away. "You said you only like forties music." Sam accused as soon as you were out of ear shot. Bucky avoided eye contact before he cleared his throat, "I have to train with Steve."
One floor below me, you don't even know me, I love you
When that and a combination of other things didn't work, keep falling back into night terrors, Bucky would sit in front of his glass windows, curtains pulled back. At first, his eyes would wander the city lights. Eventually, his eyes would shift down below and see your shadow swaying and dancing to the music that was nearly never ending. It was a constant, consistency made reality easier to believe in. You were starting to become that in Bucky's word, even though you never would've known. He never mentioned it.
If you look out your window tonight, pulling the string with the note that's attached to my heart; Read how many times I saw you, how in my silence I adored you.
Sure, Bucky and you met occasionally during missions and Avengers' (aka Tony Stark's) parties. However, neither of you ever got beyond glances, brief introductions, and the incredibly rare argument-- sorry polite conversation-- that Steve, Sam, or Nat would drag the pair of you into. Both of you would roll your eyes at the dragger and their "opponent." Plus, the pair of you would almost always be against whatever Sam was arguing. Bucky appreciated the team effort from you. You were also a bit of a history buff which sometimes led to his ears pricking up to some type of familiarity that he could confidently nod along with or it would help him connect the dots with events that didn't include the Winter Soldier.
It took one of these little rantings of knowledge you had, Steve and Sam saw the captivated look that Bucky distantly gave you. They both also knew it wasn't just the words coming out of your mouth that Bucky was interested in, either. The pair of men shared an look. They knew their mission.
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"Alright boys, it's been fun." You said getting up, heading towards your apartment. "Don't have too much fun without me." You waved as you hit the stairs.
The duo of men encircled Bucky. "You have a problem." Same stated as if it was obvious and something much worse than actuality. "Sam-" Steve tried to soften the blow. "No, he is in love with that girl and he hasn't said more than five words to her." Sam insisted. Bucky gave them both a confused stare. "Y/n, Buck, we can tell." Steve cleared up. Bucky's face went to complete denial. "No, I don't."
"Those eyes you gave her earlier tell a different story, Buck." Steve softly argued. Bucky groaned and put his hands in his face. "So what if I do? She's living a happy life...why.....why should I enter it more just to ruin it?" Sam and Steve gave each other soft looks. However, both of them were not going to give up that easily. "You're different now. You've said it yourself, you're not the Winter Soldier anymore." Sam stated. "Even if that's true...who said that she's going to....want me back." Doubt filled Bucky's entire body and mind. The pair of men were not going to change his mind in one night.
Only in my dreams did that wall between us come apart
Another night, Bucky added to looking down at your shadow. He wanted to go down and dance with you. Over seventy years ago, Bucky wouldn't waste another second to do. He would've swept you off your feet, literally. He would hold you close during the slower songs, inhaling your scent. Softly kissing your forehead, cheeks, lips... Bucky heavily sighed out loud, walking away from the window.
Oh my darlin', knock three times on the ceiling if you want me; twice on the pipe if the answer is no.
Sam and Steve showed up at your door. You gave them both a confused. "Come in...stop lurking at my door." You responded, letting them in. "So, how long have you liked Bucky?" Sam got straight to the point. You scoffed and slouched in one of your chairs. "Who said-" "Y/n, you never mentioned your knowledge about your so-called fascination with the 1930s before your first mission with him." Steve confronted you. You shrugged, "A girl can learn new things." Sam rolled his eyes. "They're both impossible, Steve." You sat up a little. "What do you mean by both of us?" For the third time that night, Sam and Steve shared a smirk and an idea.
Oh my sweetness *knock, knock, knock* means you'll meet me in the hallway; twice on the pipe *clang, clang* means you ain't gonna show*
You hummed the song you left playing in your room as you approached Bucky's door. You took a deep breath before knocked with the beat that Bucky could perfectly hear from your apartment below. He hesitantly answered. Then saw you, a small smile etched across his face. "It means that I want you, and that I want to meet you in the hallway-- granted next time it'll be on the ceiling but-" Your breath of words was stopped short by Bucky pulling you into his apartment.
~~ Sam looked at Steve, stifling a laugh, "There isn't really a pipe for her to say no to."
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homesick4la · 9 hours ago
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pushing it down and praying (part one) — hamzah
contains: a little cheating..smoking, some nsfw content but nothing crazy
summary: after half a year of no contact, you run into your ex at a party.
a/n: kinda got this idea from the lizzy mcalpine song bc i am obsessed with it. so listen if you haven’t lol. also i decided to split the fic but it’s only gonna be two parts!
it’d officially been six months since you and your ex boyfriend went no contact.
the first few months were hell for you.
of course, you went through the stereotypical phase of eating ice cream and crying to rom-coms directly after your break up. but that short-lived phase gradually shifted into one that was much more melancholic once the two of you decided to go no contact.
everyday that you woke up, you were engulfed by an emotional numbness. a dull pain that served as a constant reminder of your grief.
you were grieving what the relationship was and what it could’ve been.
you had always envisioned your future with hamzah in it which is why the lack of communication between the two of you left you absolutely soulless.
you had never experienced such an intense love before him. everything was picture perfect in the beginning. it was even better than the movies.
but after three years, the miscommunication between you to became destructive.
things that should have been minor disagreements escalated into full blown arguments. you’d yell over each other, ignoring each other’s feelings and growing overwhelmingly defensive.
eventually, it became exhausting. you were both so angry all the time and too stressed with work or school to address it properly.
ultimately, you two mutually decided to call it quits. additionally, you later agreed that going no contact would be the best option for both of you.
now, half a year later, you were finally trying to move on.
after reading an endless amount of self-help books, you learned that after experiencing every stage of relationship grief (which you had), you theoretically should be ready to search for love again.
despite your reluctance, your best friends had forced you to join all the dating apps- urging you to hook up with someone new to get your mind off your ex.
it took days of swiping left on men that were literally the epitome of a walking red flag for you to finally find a man suitable enough to go on a date with.
his name was matthew. he recently graduated from college and instantly started a 9-5 working in finance. he spent his free time hiking. he had a golden retriever.
he was kind. he was stable. but he wasn’t hamzah.
you two had gone on a few dates. you had even hooked up after a couple of them.
as guilty as it made you, each hook up was spent closing your eyes- imagining hamzah on top of you. that it wasn’t matthew deep inside of you but it was hamzah; the one that knew your body like the back of his hand and knew just how to please you every time.
you were giving your all to this “moving on” stage but you simply weren’t satisfied.
that being said, when matthew had asked you to attend an old friend’s party with him on your last date, you politely agreed.
now here you were, shuffling through a crowd of sweaty bodies with a man that barely knew you guiding you by your waist.
“how do you know the host again?” you ask, nearly yelling over the music that was blasting through numerous speakers.
“he’s a friend from my hometown, remember? from ottawa?”
“right, right. i remember now.” you look up at him. you did not remember.
you two make your way into the kitchen. he pours shots of vodka into red solo cups and hands one to you.
you feel the familiar burn of alcohol stinging your throat as you down the shot.
“you look gorgeous tonight by the way. forgot to tell you earlier.” he tells you, running his hand up and down your waist.
hamzah would’ve told you earlier. he would’ve been kissing up and down your neck before you even finished your makeup while getting ready. reiterating how beautiful you are each time his lips left your skin.
fuck. there you go again. comparing everything matthew said or did to hamzah.
he’s not in your life anymore, you think to yourself. it’s time to get over him.
“thank you.” you answer matthew, mustering up a smile.
“you ready to go meet my friends?”
“yeah, let’s go! i’m excited to meet them.” you were lying straight through your teeth. but you continued to put on this enthusiastic act simply because he was nice.
he leads you to the main room where you meet a couple of his hometown friends. one named kyle. another named josh.
they were essentially carbon copies of matthew. frat bros that grew up and became finance guys.
you quietly listen as the boys catch up on one another’s lives.
until something, someone, catches your eye.
hamzah. he was across the large room with his back faced toward you. but it had to be him.
you could recognize the shape of his shoulders and you knew that those dark curls stuffed under a camo hat could only belong to him.
you stomach drops. somehow, you had never ran into him since the breakup.
the sight of him mixed with the alcohol made you sick to your stomach.
“hey”, you tap on matthew’s shoulder. “i’m gonna go find a bathroom real quick.” you explain.
“okay, just come find me when you’re done.” he replies before resuming his conversation with his friends.
you turn around, walking in the direction of a long hallway that you knew must have a bathroom.
you turn the doorknob of the first door you find and miraculously, it is a bathroom.
you clutch onto the counter, letting out a sharp exhale.
one of your hands grips to your stomach while you continue taking deep breaths.
in for 4. hold for 7. out for 8. you repeat.
a breathing technique that hamzah had taught you.
you hear the doorknob rattle. before you can say anything, the door is being launched open.
“oh shit! sorry!”, you hear a familiar voice as the door is being pulled closed again. “wait- y/n?”
the voice belonged to mandy. hamzah’s bestfriend’s girlfriend. you forgot that her and martin were from ottawa. they must’ve known the host of the party.
she steps inside, shutting the door behind her.
“are you okay? what’re you doing here? i haven’t seen you in so long.” she pulls you into a hug.
“yeah i’m here with some guy i’ve been seeing. but i saw hamzah and just needed to take a sec.” you explain during your embrace.
she pulls away, looking in your eyes.
“did he see you?”
“no, he was facing the other direction.”
“oh okay”, she nods and looks down.
“yeah. i haven’t seen him since we ended things so, it gave me a bit of panic attack.” you chuckle awkwardly.
“i’m sorry, y/n. break ups suck.” she pauses, “when i went through my first break up, i saw my ex at an amusement park about a month after. and i got so upset, i threw up in front of one of those stupid basketball games where you can win a big teddy bear.”
you laugh at her story, “seriously?”
“yes! it was so bad, the worker ended up giving me one of those huge bears out of pity!” she exclaims.
once your laughter dies down, mandy breaks the silence once again.
“he still talks about you, you know. every once in a while.”
every once in a while. you had thought of him every single day.
“every once in a while?”
“yeah. seems like most of the time it’s too hard for him to talk about. but sometimes, he can’t help himself.”
maybe he did think of you as often as you did.
“anyway”, she continues, “whose this new guy?”
she smirks teasingly.
“ugh. mandy, he’s so boring! but he’s so nice! he’s just- he’s nothing like hamzah. i don’t know- he’s really sweet, it’s just not, exciting? i guess?”
she nods. “well, if you want my advice..i say you shouldn’t stay with someone just because they’re nice to you. a lot of people are nice. only a few people will make you feel ‘sparks’ or whatever.”
you nod understandingly.
god you missed talking to her.
“i gotta get back to martin but if you want to talk to hamzah, he went out on the balcony. and let’s not have to run into each other at a random party to catch up again, ‘kay? text me.”
“okay.” you hug her tightly, “we’ll go for coffee soon.”
she smiles before exiting the bathroom.
you look into the mirror, trying to decide if going out on the balcony is a good idea.
“fuck it.” you whisper to yourself.
you didn’t know when you’d ever get the opportunity to speak to hamzah again. you had to go out on that balcony.
you walk out of the bathroom, sneaking past matthew who was still deep in conversation.
turning the corner past the main room, you find the sliding glass door to the balcony.
there he is. alone. sat on the small balcony, lighting a joint that hangs between his lips.
with his camo hat he wore a pair of dark wash jeans and white t-shirt.
you take a deep breath before reaching to slide open the door.
his head instantly whips towards you, his eyes widening a bit.
“hi.” you break the silence. you feel awkward. what are you supposed to say to someone you’ve been completely heartbroken over for the last six months?
“hey.” his eyes soften as he speaks.
“i, um- ran into mandy. she told me you were out here.” you explain to him.
he nods slowly. “come sit.” he pats the space on the floor next to him.
you do as he says. plopping onto the ground and pulling your knees to your chest.
he takes a drag from the joint between his fingers before pulling it out and handing it over to you. you two had shared a joint countless times during your relationship, making the action feel natural.
you bring the joint to your lips, sucking on it for a few seconds before blowing out the smoke and handing it back to him.
“how’ve you been?” he asks.
his voice was calm. you wondered how he could act so nonchalant in this situation.
“i’ve been okay. school’s been stressful.” you say, trying to avoid ranting about the emotional turmoil you’ve experienced since you two separated. “how about you?”
“good. just working a lot. martin and i upload multiple times a week now and run the merch ourselves so it’s been busy, but it’s fun.” his face lights up as he talks about it. he’d always been passionate about his career.
“that’s great, hamzah. i still remember when you had him up on that cracked screen just to have him on the pod.” you laugh.
“oh god, it was a shit show trying to get that thing to run properly.” he chuckles at the memory.
it falls silent for a moment.
“you still gonna become a journalist?” he asks, cocking his head to the side while looking at you.
“that’s the plan, yeah.” you answer.
“good. you were always good with words.”
“yeah?” you smile.
“of course, it’s why i was always calling you smarty pants.”
you chuckle at the nickname you’d forgotten about.
“i thought you were calling me that because of my attitude.” since childhood, you were teased for being bit of a know it all.
“i mean- yeah that was part of it.” he laughs, “but it was mostly because of that big brain of yours.”he taps his pointer finger to your temple.
“well, i don’t feel very smart these days.” you admit. “my grades have been slipping.”
“seriously? how come?”
“just had a rough last couple months.” you try to remain vague.
“your new guy not keeping you happy?”
your eyes widen. how did he know about matthew?
“did you see me with him inside?”
“yeah. i was about to walk into the kitchen when i saw you two together.”
you exhale deeply. “oh, uh. sorry about that.”
“answer my question, y/n.” his voice was low, serious.
“what?” your voice tinged with confusion.
“are you happy?”
you think for moment. you could lie, tell him you’re happy, let him believe that you’ve moved on. but everything in you wants to be honest with him.
“i’m trying to be.” you respond quietly before taking the joint from his hands and up to your mouth once again.
his eyes were glued to you as pushed the smoke from your mouth, like he was studying your face.
“that guy’s not right for you.” he shook his head as he spoke.
“hamzah, you don’t know him.” you’re not sure why you feel the need to defend matthew but you do.
“i can see what kind of guy he is—the kind that can’t even begin to grasp the complexity to you.” he explains.
“you’re high, hamzah. and ur jumping to conclusions.”, you shift your position on the ground, “based on looks, might i add. didn’t they teach you not to do that in elementary school? the whole don’t judge a book by its cover thing? did you tune that part out?” you say as you stand from your spot. it pained you how well hamzah could read people- how accurate his description of matthew was.
“baby all this rambling makes it seem like you’re avoiding the truth—that he’s not good enough for you. and you’re not happy. i mean has he even noticed how long you’ve been gone?”
you forgot how stubborn this man could be.
you let out a defeated sigh. “it’s none of your business, really. and you’re right, i’ve been gone too long. i should get back to him.”
you steal the joint from his hand and take one last drag before you start to walk back towards the sliding glass door. you hear hamzah rise to his feet behind you.
“y/n, wait.”
you turn around, facing towards him again. “yeah?”
“i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have said that.” he apologizes.
“s’okay.”, you shrug your shoulders. “it was nice running into you.”
he nods agreeably.
you turn back around, beginning to accept that this was it. your last few seconds with him before you were back to no contact.
your hand reaches the sliding glass door, about to pull the door open when you hear hamzah’s voice once again.
“y/n, don’t go.”
don’t go.
“what?” you question, furrow your eyebrows.
he takes slow steps toward you, ditching his joint by throwing the remains of it to the floor.
he keeps walking towards you until you’re just a foot apart. he grabs your hand, pulling you to him and shifting your bodies so your lower back rested the black metal railing of the balcony as he stood directly in front of you.
his face was inches from yours. you could so easily lift your head and kiss him.
“come back to my apartment with me.” he whispered.
“why would i do that?” you replied, feeling the pace of your breath quicken due to the close proximity.
“because you miss me.” the corner of his mouth upturned into a cocky smirk. “and i miss you.”
you were speechless. all you could do was stare into his eyes, trying to decipher whether or not those words had actually just left his mouth.
you swallow harshly before speaking, “i’m here with someone else, hamzah. i’m going home with him.”
you try to stand your ground, but god you wanted to give in.
he scrunches his nose and shakes his head as he places his hands on the metal railing behind you, trapping you between his arms.
“but he doesn’t know you like i do.”
before you can respond, you feel his fingers brush your hair away from the side of your neck.
he places his hands on waist as his head falls to your neck, his plump lips hovering above your skin. your head instinctively leans to the side, giving him full access.
“does he know how much you like being kissed right here?” he whispers softly, feeling his lips move on your skin as he speaks.
he presses his lips to place where your neck and shoulder meet, remembering how much this spot had an effect on you.
you shut your eyes in utter satisfaction. you hated how much of an effect he had on you.
you bring your hands to his neck, then weaving your fingers through his curls as he continues kissing, sucking, and nipping at the sweet spots on your neck.
his hands float down, gripping onto your hips- another minuscule touch that he knew drove you crazy.
with his hands on your hips, he pulls your bodies closer. suddenly, the thought of matthew has completely vanished. you’re completely caught up in hamzah, and it felt so good- indulging in his recognizable scent and familiar touch.
you let out a soft moan as his hand falls to your ass, grabbing it shamelessly.
“hamzah, hamzah— i can’t, we can’t do this.” you say breathlessly, using your hand to tap on his chest.
hamzah steps back, his breath unsteady as watches you carefully, his gaze lingering on your lips. for a moment, you think he isn’t going to say anything— that he was just going to turn around and walk away.
but then he leans, his voice low “meet me outside in five.” his tone carrying both a question and a promise.
you feel a rush of nerves as he walks away, opening the sliding glass door and slipping back into the crowd.
you stay out there for a moment, catching your breath.
you shouldn’t go. you know you shouldn’t.
but you couldn’t stop thinking about the way he looked at you.
a/n: yuppppp part two coming very very soon and it’s gonna pick up right where this leaves off. sorry if this is long and boring, tbh i just needed something to distract myself from everything going on lol…k bye muah
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journey-to-the-attic · 20 hours ago
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So we know that Lucifer gets really sweet and affectionate with IK when he's drunk, but what about the others?
a good question!! not sure if you meant just the other brothers or the side characters as well, but i did them all to be safe
as covered, lucifer gets steadily more affectionate the more he drinks, but this is more a knock-on effect from the fact that alcohol makes him more honest; put him near someone he doesn't like and he will tear them to shreds
mammon gets loud and cheerful, but also has frequent mood swings, so he'll go from "YEAHHHH I LOVE YOU KIDDO" to "euughhghgjhff kid i don't deserve you :((((" in a matter of minutes. if there's music he'll drag ik to dance with him, but this usually involves mammon just picking her up and going crazy by himself
levi at first becomes more outgoing and confident, but once drunk enough he'll ask ik like ten times over if she's mad at him, and cry even when she says no. he also has to be watched because if he gets out of the house he will cause some kind of incident
satan (similarly to the demon-nip chapter) gets really giggly and finds everything ik says the funniest thing ever, and also suddenly decides keeping ik amused is his one goal, so he'll do nearly anything if he thinks ik will laugh at it
asmo gets very affectionate and energetic first, then sappy, and finally sad, and there is no changing this cycle. lots of spontaneous hugs, and sometimes it ends up like that one "came home drunk and got really excited to see my cat" post, where the cat has lipstick marks on its fur and looks incredibly frazzled
beel also gets very sappy, but he prefers to sit and and gaze around at everyone in a sort of adoring haze; he will, however, continuously attempt to feed ik throughout the night, and get sad if she refuses too much
belphie just goes straight to sleep once drunk enough. however, he can be woken up drunk, and when this happens he'll latch onto whoever woke him up and goes back to sleep - so ik just ends up being used as a teddy bear
diavolo gets so very loud and happy. he'll start making speeches and toasts to and about everyone, and if allowed to look at ik for too long he starts tearing up about how small she is and how human children are just so sweet
barbatos very rarely gets drunk, and even when he does it's VERY hard to tell. the only real signs: an uptick in the rate at which he addresses ik as "my dear", an unusually absent look in his eyes, and missing the cup when he goes to pour
simeon loses about 50% of his motor functions and just sort of stumbles around giggling giddily. when he spots ik he cheers like a kid and then starts pinching her cheeks and ruffling her hair like a grandmother
solomon gets really frowny and thoughtful, but as soon as he's interrupted and allowed to start speaking it becomes clear that he's very boyish like this - joshes around and roughhouses with ik like a 12yo older brother, but gets really mad if someone joins in and goes what he perceives as too far
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snzunii · 2 days ago
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goodnight n go ( ran h. ) — part two.
it's really bad that you get along so well.
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tags. romance, angst, betrayal, hurt/comfort, established relationship, explicit sexual content, bonten!ran, detective!reader, canon-typical violence, crimes and criminals, drugs, smoking, drinking, illegal activities, EIGHTEEN PLUS ONLY.
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“Baby. Wake up.” you stirred in your sleep, trying to pull the blanket over your head just so you couldn't hear your boyfriend, whispering in your ear to get the fuck up. “YN.”
“Leave me alone, Ran.” you mumbled, getting anything that you could reach just to cover your face but he’s one step ahead of you, there's nothing left for you to cover your head with. “Fuck.”
You heard him laugh, you felt the bed sink as he sat beside you. “Breakfast’s ready. Come on.”
But you didn't want to stand up. You just want to stay in bed and rot with him. Is that so bad? You haven't had the chance to see and be with each other this long, is it so bad to have one day for the two of you? 
It isn't, right?
“Can we just stay in? We don't have to go to work today, right?”
You weren't that serious—okay, maybe you are. But you didn't think that Ran would lay down beside you and go along with what shenanigans you wanted to do today, “Okay.”
“What, okay?”
“Let’s stay in today.” 
“Really? Aren't you like, needed for work because, I don't know, your boss is a pain in the ass?” you asked him with a wide smile, you looked at him and you saw his pretty eyes looking at you—you suddenly felt conscious, you just woke up, you haven't even brushed your teeth yet.
But he’s still looking at you like you’re the most beautiful woman in the world. 
“Yeah. But that’s a problem for tomorrow.” he smirked, leaning in to kiss you but you pulled away and that made him frown, “What?”
You covered your mouth with your hand, “Bad breath.” you said with a muffled voice.
“The fuck I care, kiss me.” he says and pulls your hand away, you giggled and let him press his lips gently into yours—he bites your lip, and you close your eyes, draping your arm over his neck, pulling him close to you.
You both pulled away, gasping for air. “Yeah, you should brush your teeth.”
“Ran!”
“Kidding.”
You rolled your eyes at him and he just laughed at you, “You’re such a brat.”
“But you love me.” you said, closing your eyes again.
“Hmm. You’re going to sleep again?” you feel his arm slipping under your head, making it your pillow, “Don't you wanna eat first?”
“Too sleepy.” you murmured, “Wake me up in five minutes, ‘kay?”
You didn't hear him answer but  it’s not long until you hear him say your name again.
“YN.”
You open your eyes, and there you are in front of him—with a gun in his hand. How the fuck did you get here?
“Ran.”
Ran held your wrist, pulling you away from the watching eyes. He knows they're not going to do anything—and they know that Ran’s not going to let you go that easily.
Even though you’re his girlfriend, Ran is in too deep in this shit—yeah, they think he’s stupid for having a detective girlfriend—but they know he wouldn't turn that easily, maybe.
You compromised their location, you found them. You could’ve called for back up the moment you saw the guy that you arrested back then, but all that you were thinking of was Ran. You could just easily point your gun to any of them but you didn't do any of that.
They know you wouldn't do that to Ran. They don't know you that much, but the look in your eyes was enough for them to know that you wouldn't just give him up—even if it’s the right thing to do.
You didn't pull away or protest—you didn't push him away, there were no arguments as he pulled you into the other room, with no other people, just the two of you. “YN—”
Instead of you speaking, your palms met his face over and over. “Fuck you. Fuck you, fuck you—”
“Stop.” he says, holding both your wrists. “Stop, YN.”
“Why the fuck would you do this to me? How could you?” your voice was small and shaky, your tears falling continuously, “Why the fuck would you keep something like this from me? You know how hard I worked, you know all of it, then you…?”
You look at him, and you see that he’s Ran… but he’s different. He’s like a stranger, a stranger with a familiar face. A stranger that you touch, you hold, you confide in—that you know—a stranger you love.
Ran couldn't find the words that he wanted to say. He hid this from you because he was selfish—he wanted to keep you, he wanted to be close to you.
If he could live this double life forever just to keep you, then he probably would. 
He was different when he was with you, but that doesn't change the fact that he’s a horrible person who’s done a lot of horrible things, right? That’s how you see him now. “I wanted to protect you—”
“Protect me?” you laughed bitterly, “You really think that you keeping all of this from is protecting me? No, you're lying to me! Deceiving me, you were there every night! Listening to me struggle and you’re one of them?! Why, Ran? Why—”
“Because!” he slammed his hand on the table, “Because I fucking love you! I know it’s bullshit, I’m a fucking horrible person! How the fuck am I capable of love? But I do! I do love you and it’s so frustrating hiding all of this from you!”
You ignored what he said. Because if you did choose to acknowledge all that, you would’ve easily run into his arms—turn your back on your morals and just go with him wherever.
You’re too stupid and heartbroken to think straight that all you wanted to do was to touch him. You wanted him to hold you in his arms and tell you all the things he’s said before, that he’s there… that you’ve got nothing to worry about as long as you’re with him.
You can feel your chest closing in on you, it’s like you’re being suffocated to death that you needed to get out. “I need to leave.”
“You can't do that.” he said, holding your wrist when you were about to walk out the door. You tried to swat his hand away but he kept his hold on you, well, you really can't leave this place—it’s not that easy.
And maybe, he was afraid that if he let you leave—if he let you walk out that door, you’d be gone forever. 
From him… from his life. 
“Let me go!” you yelled, trying to wriggle out of his touch, but he pulled you into the couch, “The fuck—”
“I can't let you do that!” he shouted back, “Do you think you could just walk out of here? Do you think they wouldn't fucking kill you the moment you step out of this building?”
“Okay.” you said quietly, almost a whisper but enough for him to hear you, “Can you just please… let go of my hand.”
Ran sat in front of you, on his knees. “YN. Listen to me.”
“What?” your voice cracks, your tears still falling at the side of your eyes, you try to look at him, but every time you do, you feel like sobbing—so you look away. 
“I love you.” he whispered, “I love you.” 
That was all he could say because that is the truth. The only thing in his life that he didn't lie about to you.
You finally look at him, he smiles at you like he didn't do anything wrong—like with just one smile from him, everything will be okay.
And it’s not. Nothing’s ever going to make this okay.
“I love you, YN.” he cups your cheek and you don't pull away, his thumb brushing away the tears streaming down your face. His touch was familiar, it was comforting—just how it was before. “Please, don't leave. Just stay, hm? Stay.”
You have never seen him so… desperate, that he might just die if you didn't give in. But he had to try, if losing his dignity was the only way for you to stay then he would.
But it was a big thing. It’s a big selfish thing to overlook all the things that he had done, and you don't know if you could live with yourself with all of this.
But, it’s Ran. How could you do this to him? How could you leave him?
It’s Ran, for fuck’s sake. It’s Ran, you love him. You’d do everything for him. You’d jump off a cliff for him. 
It’s him, you were going to build a family with him. He was there for you, the only one there when you were basically empty. When you had nothing, he was the only one there. So… how?
How could you even think about this?
It’s Ran. 
There’s no question about that. 
Fuck, YN. Think.
Think.
“YN—” you cut him off by pressing your lips into him, you drape your arm over his neck to pull him close. 
You tug on his tie and deepens the kiss because fuck it. You both pull away to breathe, he presses his forehead against yours, you close your eyes and just try to feel him.
Just try to forget all the things that were happening. 
His lips find yours again, but this time he was kissing you so hungrily, his teeth tugging on your bottom lip as if he was craving you for a very long time, your fingers unbuttoning his suit—you feel the cushion on your back as he towers over you.
His kisses travel down your neck, his hands unbuttoning—no, more like ripping your blouse, favorite blouse, open and pulling your pants down—ridding you of your clothes, you bite back a moan when his hands squeeze the swell of your clothed tits. 
“Let me hear you.” he groaned, you can feel the vibrations on your skin, it’s as if you feel the nerve impulses all throughout your body. “Fuck, please.”
“Please, baby.” here you are legs sprawled open, under him but he’s the one pleading you, was he always this desperate for you?
His hands sets your panties aside, his fingers finding your swollen clit, drawing circles, trying to get just one fucking noise from you.
Finally, you gasp, your fingers gripping his hair as he pushes his fingers in and out of your cunt. Fuck, yes he was always this desperate.
Always so desperate to make you moan his name, always desperate to see your finger-fucked out face—he’s the only one who could make you like this, what makes you think that he would ever let go of you?
Why would he ever let go of you when you're so beautiful and helpless under him? Getting fucked ruthlessly, your legs hanging on his shoulder as he pump his cock in and out of your pussy?
“R-Ran, fuck! Please, slow down—ah!”  you were a fucking mess, sobbing—mumbling all the right words that should come out of your mouth when he’s hitting all the right, sensitive spot inside you. 
But it seems so hard to hear all your pleas when his hips slams into you like this, both your skin slapping, your wet pussy squelching when his dick slams inside you—it was too good, too good for him to stop, too fucking good to listen to you plead him to slow down, not when he can feel your cunt sucking him in.
You weren't sure anymore where you are, all you could see was your boyfriend’s face, fucking the life out of you.
Every grunt he was making passes through your ears and travels throughout your body. It was too much, you were exhausted—too exhausted to be in the right mind. Too tired to think if this is even right, if you should be even getting fucked right now.
You were already mumbling incoherent words when he switch your positions out, you were all on fours holding on the cushion while he fucks you raw from the back, he leans forward, squeezes your tits and pushes you against his chest.
“...too much, baby, slow down.” you whimpered, if only you could see the look on his face, “Ran, baby, please.”
“Tell me you’re mine.” he grunts, his voice hoarse—his breath was warm against your skin, “You're not going to leave, are you? ‘S too good, right?”
“‘m not, baby.” you gasp, your stomach churning as you feel his thrusts slow down, so agonizingly slow that you feel like he’s fucking with you, “‘m not going to leave. I love you.”
“Fuck!” he slammed his cock deeper, holding both your hips as he fucks you harder and harder, “Fuck, fuck—say that again. Say you fucking love me.”
“I love you,” you breathlessly say, “I fucking love you.”
You were just there sitting in silence—you, only wearing his coat, hands intertwined as you lean your head on his shoulder.
No one was speaking, you were bathing in the solace of just being there—together. It’s as if nothing happened, it’s as if you’re not going to make a big decision that’s going to affect your lives together.
Ran was the first one to speak, “Did you mean it?”
“Mean what?” you answer mindlessly.
“You said,” he paused, “You’re not going to leave, did you mean it?”
You don't answer him because you don't know. You have no idea if you mean it or not, all you know is you just wanted to stay here for a moment and not think about anything.
He squeezes your hand, his thumb caressing your skin, he holds on to you tight as if he’s going to lose you and holding on to you was the only way for you not to slip away. 
“He’s my brother. The one with the long hair, similar color to mine.”
“I figured.” you whispered, “He looks a lot like you.”
“Yeah?” you hummed. “I guess.”
“Are we going to stay here forever?” you asked, “I’m hungry. I was going to cook dinner but…”
“You, cooking?” you heard him chuckle, “You sure about that?”
You immediately looked at him with a glare, “Excuse me?”
Your gaze softened when you saw that annoying smile on his face, just like that, it’s like everything was normal. It’s like you were on the bubble again, just the two of you—him teasing you, you being a brat but succumbs to him, and smiles back at him anyway.
But then you remember all the things that he lied about, all the things that you found out and all the things that you are about to find out. 
“I love you.” he says. “I love you so much that I don't know what I’m going to do if I lose you… am I? Losing you?”
“I don't know,” your voice was small, almost silent just like the room that surrounds you, “Would you let me go? Would you let yourself lose me?”
The silence settled once again. He looks into your eyes, and if you looked closely you could almost see the vulnerability inside. 
He’s Ran Haitani, he’s feared by some people. Even you figured that out. But when it comes to you, he’s not afraid to look stupid—he’s not afraid to beg you not to leave him.
You leaned your forehead against his, closing your eyes as you felt the ache in your chest. If it’s only that simple, if only you could say yes that easily.
You took a shaky breath as you felt your tears once again, “How do we do this, Ran? How do I love you like this?”
Ran doesn't know either. How could you love him when he’s this? But he’s too selfish to let you go, he’s too caught up in this mess that he holds on to you because you’re the only thing in his life that makes sense.
“Do you want to leave?”
“Leave?”
“We’ll leave. We’ll run away, me and you.” 
Hearing him say those words just added to the pain you were feeling. He’s ready to risk it all for you. But this is wrong. “Why are you making it so hard for me to love you?” 
Leaving isn't the solution, because one way or another, they're going to find you and that would probably end with the two of you dying. But if that’s what it takes to keep you, then he would gladly leave.
You can see the pain in his eyes, in those eyes that hold so much adoration for you. He pulls you in, your head leaning on his chest. You close your eyes as you listen to his heart beat, it was once again comforting, but it shouldn't be. It shouldn't.
 “Then just let me love you enough for the both of us, hm?”
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pseudophan · 4 hours ago
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Since you're the go-to phannie dream blog in my mind, here's my dream log from last night:
I had a really lovely dream last night where dan and phil were for some reason hosting a giant pool party that was like the size of a tit show and they were doing it multiple times. At the start they joked about how people liked to theorize about the phouse’s structure and how they saw some people saying that they had a pool in their basement because of this event, and dan did his jokey shout about how they have other things to pay for and how they would not have hosted us in their totally fake pool in their basement to protect the phouse’s address. He left us very unclear about whether or not they actually had a pool in their basement and pool hill grew exponentially because it had been a somewhat niche topic that mostly came up in phanfic before. At each pool event, they had a group of people that were invited into a smaller pool with them while the rest of the fans partied in the giant, theatre sized pool in the background. Yet somehow it was not at all overwhelming sound or people wise, it felt strangely intimate. I was super shocked that I was invited to the small pool this time, and I felt a bit of imposter syndrome with it. We started with everyone kinda standing in a circle around dan and phil and then we broke off depending on who we wanted to talk to. But pretty much everyone went to talk with dan? I was very sad and went with just a few people to hang out with phil while there was a relatively giant circle around dan, but he looked like he was having a good time. Dan was mostly standing around in the center with his cohort and phil and me and a little kid named charlie (or something cute with a c) wandered around him like we were in a lazy river. It was strange because there was no water resistance and it didn’t feel like we were in the water at all, but we were. We had a very nice chat about nothing really of substance, but I felt like I was talking to a friend. Charlie eventually wandered off, he was around 6 so it made sense that he was bored, and phil went to go and sit on the sidelines with a towel. I was intimidated by the group around dan so I went and collected the mini chocolate bars that were floating around, occasionally bumping into charlie. I have no idea who his parents were – was he their kid or just a kid who happened to be unsupervised? It was very unclear. I got a handful of chocolate and went to phil to show off what I had found. He seemed excited that I had found a good amount, but sad that there was one that had been opened at the bottom of the pool-waste of a good chocolate he said. I sat next to him and we compared chocolate. They were all fancy branded chocolate but with special flavors that had funny icons and names. He said that his favorite was the disco chocolate with a unicorn on it and it was like a cookies and cream type thing. He bit into it with gusto as I opened my first wrapper. Not sure what the flavor was, but it had a chestnut horse on the front and it looked to have some sort of nut on the inside. It was bizarre how the seemingly normal paper wrapper had protected it from all water, pool smell, etc. It seemed like they had never been in the pool. Some girl who wasn’t in pool attire came up and said that it wasn’t fair that I was hoarding phil, which I thought was strange because I had left him alone for a while when I was collecting chocolate and no one went up to him but I said I was happy to give her some time alone with him, but then she huffed and went over to dan (who was, mind you, in the pool and she just went straight in with her fancy emo attire without seeming to care if it got wet). Phil brushed her off and we sat in a comfortable silence watching dan entertain in the pool. I woke up feeling very parasocially nourished. 
-golden-phig
this is how detailed my dreams were when i was on zoloft, goddamn
the idea of a dan and phil pool party is hysterical can i just say, especially one where they split up to talk to people the entire time i think they might die. can you imagine the discourse if everyone only wanted to talk to dan 😭 i got stressed just reading that
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gladoswantscake · 3 days ago
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Just a Scratch - Goro Majima x Reader
Summary: This wasn't the first time he came home in the middle of the night beaten up.
Warnings: Minor spoilers from Kiwami 1
Available on AO3
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The outside of Kamurocho's bright neon city lights shined warmly through your bedroom curtains as you slept. Tonight was quiet. Too quiet and lonely. Tonight was one of those nights when you couldn't fall asleep. You roll over to stare at the empty spot on the other side of the bed; desolated and cold. It lacked your lover. Nighttime was when you longed for him the most. You only ever get to see him when he leaves for work and when he comes home at night. Going many hours each day without seeing him makes you yearn for his presence. A good day is when Majima comes home to you.
Of course, being a patriarch has more responsibilities and also requires him to attend to more important matters. He'd be lucky if he was able to come home before dusk. But that was rare.
You roll back over to your side to glance at the clock. Almost midnight. You'd only been in bed for nearly two hours and not a feeling of drowsiness hit you. At least he'll be home anytime now. You make an attempt to try to sleep.
Not even ten minutes in and the sound of three loud knocks erupts you from your sleep. The noise startles you as you sit up quickly, feeling your heart pacing rapidly. The continuous loud knocking begins to strike a nerve in you.
"Alright... Alright..." You shout as you sluggishly get out of bed.
You drag yourself to the front door, rubbing your face as you unlock the deadbolt and the knob. Upon opening the door stood Majima; beaten and bruised up.
What shocked you even more was his new attire: A dirty pink bodycon dress with torn fish net stockings, tousled blond wig, and press-on nails. The makeup was surprisingly well-kept on his face despite how badly wounded the rest of his body was.
You then remembered this morning before he left, he spoke to you about an idea he had in mind to lure Kiryu: If there was one thing that many men loved, it was women.
But you didn't expect Majima to come home dressed as a hostess.
"Sorry if I woke ya up. I lost my key."
You took no time to pulling him into your home. "What the hell happened to you this time?"
Majima follows you from behind, removing and tossing the pink high heels onto the floor at the front door in the process. A sly grin appears on his face. "I uh, got my butt beat again by Kiryu-chan." He follows you into the bathroom.
Ever since Kiryu got out of prison, Majima has been coming up with weird ideas.
Majima sits on the seat of the toilet. He watches as you dig through the cabinet searching for your medical supplies. It felt like a ritual to patch him up every time he came home injured. He never complained once about it. He secretly enjoyed being doctored up by you. Physical touch was a love language of his.
You set out bandages, rubbing alcohol, and pads on the sink then leaving in search for a bath towel in the bedroom.
"I thought Goromi would have been the perfect hostess to make him swoon." He removes the messy blond wig. "Almost had him too!"
"Maybe he's not into buff women." You shout from outside of your bedroom.
As Majima waits for your return, he begins to undress himself. The tight fabric of the dress was making it impossible for his fingertips to reach the zipper. Even trying to pull the dress downward didn't budge. "What a goddamn pain." He grumbles. "Who the hell makes these dresses where ya can't even get out of?!"
You quickly return to him, unzipping the dress for him revealing. Large bruises already forming on his bare back.
"Thank you, doll." He sighs in relief.
"This has to be the most uncomfortable thing I've ever worn." He removes the pink thong before wrapping a towel around his waist. "Do ya think pink looks good on me?" He jokes.
"I think it accentuates your figure." You glance up at him. A faint bruise was starting to appear on his jaw and a few scrapes scattered amongst his face.
"I'm sorry your idea didn't go as planned." You remove his eyepatch before getting started. Your hands cups both sides of his cheeks to examine the damage. You then reach for the gauze wipe then the alcohol. After lightly dousing the wipe, you cautiously dab his face.
"Ah, don't be sorry. I had fun." He winces at the feeling of the alcohol wipe stinging his cheek. "You should'ave seen Kiryu blushin'." He chuckles softly.
"So Goromi, huh?"
Majima laughs to himself. "Oh yeah. Now that you reminded me. I gotta a great story to tell ya."
----------------------
After disposing the used gauze and band aids, you return to him to observe his beaten face. The condition was slight better than it was prior.
"I'm worried for you."
"How so?"
"I'm worried that one of these nights you won't come home."
"Aw Y/N-chan..." His voice trails. His hands roam up your waist. "Don't be havin' those thoughts, besides it feels like I only took a scratch." He gives you a reassuring smile.
"I get that you enjoy fighting, but there's only so many times you can do it before something bad happens to you."
Majima sighs. His hands move to your wrists, taking them in his hands. "Darlin' I've told you many times I can't quit. It ain't no easy job. Hell, I've been a yakuza my whole life and I'm still kicking."
Majima was extremely defensive when it came to you preaching concern about his brawling habits. There was no way he was backing down something that he enjoyed doing. But with what you said was true. All the times he got into conflict, the thought of him ending up dead never crossed his mind. He had gotten an earful from you when he came home from the hospital a couple of weeks ago when one of his subordinate's accidently stabbed him. He could see why an incident like that concerned you for his safety.
"I may have some cuts and bruises, but I'm still here. I ain't goin' nowhere. I promise."
"Promise?"
He pulls you into his lap. "As long as come home to see my Y/N-chan." His lips peck yours, leaving a faint lipstick stain on your lips.
Your hand runs through his messy undercut. "I'll be waiting for you in bed."
"You're not gonna join me?" He whines. "I haven't seen my Y/N-chan all day."
You took your time contemplating the idea.
"At least let me return you the favor." He purrs. "I gotta show how much I appreciate all that you've done for me."
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