#the fact that I finished Stars and Stripes just amplifies that excitement

[artem1sc0re]

GUESS WHO PLAYED HUMAN CONDITIONS DLC??? MEEE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥

Only 1 mission tho, im still playing the bad blood DLC☠️

Also my Aiden figure arrived so take this skit/shitpost or whatever u call it

[idga-buck]

use somebody || one

pairing: harry x plus-size!reader

word count: 2,100

warnings: mentions of sex, douchebaggery, and shitty attitudes toward women

summary: a first encounter and you aren’t exactly what harry expected

challenge: @baezen​‘s The Other Guys Writing Challenge

masterlist next

gif: @sebastiansource

A door closed with a heavy slam, sharp click of the lock following shortly after, and Harry’s eyes opened immediately. The king bed was so comfortable, he didn’t bother trying to move at the disturbance. Instead he lay perfectly still, the plush pillow that engulfed his face obscuring the vision of his right eye, glancing around at the clean striped walls and the minimalist art it held. The shower started and shortly after the amplified notes of a song he didn’t know was flowing out from under the bathroom door. He stayed in bed for a few more minutes listening to two voices in harmony, one echoing off the shower tiles and distorting the song slightly. He didn’t mind it. By the time the shower was off and the song changed to another, slightly more familiar to him, Harry had just finished tying his shoes from his perch at the end of the bed. The sheets were wrinkled and curled around nothing like thick linen snakes and he fell backwards into them one more time, waiting and remembering a night of unexpected but not unpleasant sex. It wasn’t his intent to stay all night let alone fall asleep there, but now that he had, he wanted to be a gentleman about it. Say goodbye instead of slipping out under the cover of running water and the radio playing. His friends would be shitting on him for it, but he wasn’t like them. At least not completely. He’d let himself be the sacrificial lamb and he’d let himself fall into bed with a wealthy stranger for the sake of evening out the numbers after all.

When Nikki and Garret had spotted the pair across the bar, Harry was content to let them make fools of themselves alone. He had a drink and another young woman he’d set his sights on. She’d been eye fucking him from across the black lacquered bar, lingering in front of the group, and drawing a finger up the inside of his arm after every drink she served. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Harry thought it might be an act to get more tips out of him, but after she locked eyes with him just before dropping a maraschino cherry between her teeth at a glacial and teasing pace, he decided that hooking up with a bartender would be a very satisfying end to his Saturday night. It just wasn’t in the stars.

Once his friends’ twosome became an unexpected threesome, Harry was called into the line of duty. His services were required to fulfill the men’s fresh fantasies and all it would take was an evening of keeping the “other friend” entertained. He’d looked longingly over the bar at his half sleeved goddess, drawing away from him to go give her flirty attentions to another sap down the way. He stepped away from the bar, drowning his drink and picking up the fresh one she’d delivered before abandoning him before spotting his friends at a rounded booth in the corner, not so discreetly sending SOS texts under the table, all of which he felt vibrating against his thigh. There indeed was a fifth head at the table, turned away from him, but soon he’d be the sixth, so he took another drink. The cashed in IOU propelling him through the bar and Harry told himself if he ever had to move again, he wouldn’t be asking these two idiots. His hand immediately fell on your shoulder and you smiled curiously up at him as he slid in next to you. It was a lovely smile, beautiful eyes. That made things easier. So began the dance.

The door unlocked and opened and Harry rolled his head over the mess of sheets toward the sound when the action was followed by silence. “You’re still here.” It wasn’t a question, but it wasn’t exactly pleasant sounding either.

Harry rose up onto his elbows and stared back at you, already dressed in black pants and a white t-shirt, tight across your chest, with your hair pulled back. “Yeah,” he smiled, scrambling semi conscious of the fact that you were far less excited now than the night before. “I thought we could-“ his defense, cut off by the sound of knocking. You didn’t even blink at him. Just turned and walked toward the door, ushering in a uniformed bellhop pushing a clothed cart. “Yeah… that,” he mumbled as your breakfast was left and you slipped the boy a decent tip, before closing the door behind him.

“Sorry,” you shrugged, pulling a bowl of oatmeal and a handful of blueberries from the array and stepping back toward the sleeping area. You dropped the berries one by one into your mouth and gestured with the other, pulling one finger from the bowl to point at the cart. “Help yourself.”

Harry was reticent, but not in a position to turn free breakfast from a fancy hotel, so he slid off the bed and made his way over to the cart to find something to eat. He watched from the sofa across the large room, plate of food balanced on his knees while you refilled your coffee and went about your morning like he wasn’t even present. It was awkward and jilted and nothing like the night you’d spent together.

He hated being “that guy,” the distraction guy, the suck up to the girl that no one else wanted guy, but you’d made it ridiculously easy. Eager to talk with him, not at all hesitant to touch him or lean in when he touched you, and when Nikki winked across the table, suggesting he drive you back to your place, you kissed his cheek and told him you couldn’t wait, taking care of his drink tab before leading him away. It wasn’t his first choice, but he wasn’t mad about it. The attention seemed so genuine, like you were happy to have someone there just for you too. He understood that completely and without really trying, he fell into the charade. From the outside you two looked like a couple, close talking, lips brushing in the elevator, hands feeling all over kind of couple. His best lines landed every time and you really did have beautiful eyes, he didn’t have to hem and haw over compliments. He knew what he was doing, but it felt better than usual and he had no regrets. Until now.

“Ok,” you announced, dropping your breakfast back onto the pushcart and gathering your phone, keys, and a few other personal items to hide away in a leather bag. The thick leather strap nestled between your breasts and without warning, Harry’s ears grew hot remembering the feeling of his face in the same spot. “I have to go to work, so you-“

“It’s Sunday,” he stated quickly and as if it mattered, but you looked unamused. “Who works on Sunday?” He shrugged, offering a cute little smirk like the ones you were eating up last night.

“I do,” you said impatiently, looking at him like he an idiot. “I literally just said that.”

Oh shit. “Did I do something wrong?” Harry asked, feeling incredibly awkward. Again. You’d been so responsive to… everything the night before. He could still hear the sighs and gasps while he took you on the bed that you hadn’t even glanced at this morning. Did you regret it? You weren’t too drunk, you seemed really into him. He was almost expecting to be held hostage by your body pressed tight against his, unable to slip out until after promising to see you again. Clearly that wasn’t the case. “Last night, we-“

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong. You did what you were told.” Huh? You looked around the room and groaned. “Fine, look, I won’t be back until really late, so… hang out for a little while longer if you need to. Order food to the room, whatever. Don’t order porn, I don’t want that shit on the statement,” your list was reasonable and Harry watched as you stuffed some of your belongings into the closet safe and tested the handle after hearing the metallic trill of the lock engaging. That’s smart. “There’s a pool, obviously. Just slide the key,” you dropped your spare on to the coffee table in front of him, “under the door when you leave or take it to the front desk.” When he didn’t respond, you leaned over, placing your face in front of his. Not to kiss him though. Apparently that time had passed. “Sound good?”

Harry was a little shell shocked, but he nodded. “You have a phone charger?” He held up his little black flip phone and you shook your head.

“Not for that,” you were already walking toward the door. “Call down and have them check lost and found. People leave them behind all the time.” He was prepared to watch you leave without another glance or a proper send off, feeling very weird about the whole exchange, but you stopped half way out the door and popped your head back in. “You’re cute. I had fun.” And before he could say thank you, you were gone. Yeah, you too.

--

“Wait- Where are you?”

“The Roosevelt,” Harry said again, pulling back the curtains to look down at the pool. It was bigger than he expected and was genuinely considering taking you up on the offer to stay a while. You wouldn’t be back until late, you’d said and while he didn’t know what constituted late in your world, he assumed he wouldn’t have to endure another awkward encounter as long as he left before it got dark.

Nikki was swearing excitedly through the phone and in just over an hour, had perched himself proudly on a lounge chair by the pool. Harry swam up the edge, chin resting over his folded hands while two girls smiled and waved. He returned a similar half gesture before Nikki started berating him for not taking full advantage of his surroundings.

“You win,” Nikki conceded, nodding at a pool boy who’d just delivered a fresh round of drinks for them and for an older woman in a gold bikini across the water. He pursed his lips and held up his own cocktail when she looked over, seemingly pleased to find some young Calvin Klein model type as her admirer.

“Was the bag a fake?” Harry asked, drying his hair and face before dropping into a chair next to his buddy’s. That's how Nikki chose his girls. Based on their potential. Or how desperate they looked. Depending on his mood and where he was financially. Usually without a dime in his bank account, he settled for the wealthy and the lonely and milked it for all it was worth.

“Nah, gift from a friend of her father’s,” Nikki leaned back, unperturbed by the implication.

“Gross,” Harry shook his head and looked around the pool, suddenly hyper aware of his surroundings. In Nikki’s eyes, he’d won. He’d gone home with the right girl, financially speaking, but that hadn’t been on his mind last night. It still wasn’t. Unlike Nikki, he had an apartment. He had a job. He wasn’t on top of the world by any means and there were still nights he had to prioritize, which meant staying home with a package of Ramen and his DVD collection instead of going out, but all Harry wanted from a girl was to want him too. It shouldn’t be that hard to find and yet… he had a list of unfortunate hook ups that ended in either a fight where he couldn’t defend himself or the girl getting annoyed with his lack of ambition. It was LA. If you weren’t rising you were falling behind. At least that’s how it felt most of the time.

“I’m gonna shower and head out,” Harry waited expectantly for his friend to stand with him. When he was left standing alone, he turned to leave.

“Bring back that key before you go,” Nikki called out. “I might need it.”

“No way in hell,” Harry responded, kicking the lounge his friend was dozing off on. “Ask to use hers,” he nodded toward the cougar shooting predatory glances at them from over the rim of her bright Midori sour.

Nikki didn’t even have to think about it, abandoning the drink and left over food on the table next to Harry to dive into the pool, stay under while he crossed over to where she was seated, and pop up dramatically, shaking his hair out before stalking over to her. Harry rolled his eyes and grabbed the attention of an attendant, pointing out the mess left behind and mentioned that his friend likely wouldn’t be back. Thanking them with a low high five, Harry walked out of the pool and back up to your room to change back into the fresh clothes Nikki had brought for him. As he slid the extra key card across the desk at check in, he paused and asked if they had a phone number on file for the room. His request was denied and he wasn’t surprised. When Jay Z and Beyoncé are throwing after parties somewhere, the staff’s discretion is required. Always. If he’d been thinking about it, he would have left his number somewhere in the room for you.

Harry thanked the woman behind the desk and walked off without arguing, not surprised that his attempt to reach out was denied, just unexpectedly disappointed.

A/N: Idk what to say here lol. Had an idea, felt very cheesy like a rom com and a little out of character for someone like Bucky, which is why despite the blog name and the character that introduced me to the Seabass fandom, my first posted story isn’t about him. Spread is... not great, but Harry was a delight and struck me as both the perfect side character for the Ashton shit show and also somewhat out of place in that world. He’s a sensitive frog dad and deserves love too. Even if he’s tool adjacent. Plus I have this compulsion to write things that other people aren’t writing so this feels very on brand. 

Don’t know if anyone will read this, but I’m writing it anyways. PEACE.