#the ensnaring of mairon aulëndil

[ladysternchen]

All of Arda is autistic- Mairon

His whole being convulsed with the laughter of the others, the noise going through and through, hurting his hearing, boring into him like a chisel, the narrow kind he used for delicate work. “There, my brethren, we have a… what shall we call it?”  Aulë’s voice was full of that hateful laughter as he held up something Mairon did not even want to try and name. In his opinion, mistakes were things to be hidden, not ever talked about, lest of all shown to others. He hated mistakes. Bad enough that Yavanna with her stupid plants and animals filled all Arda with things that were by nature imperfect, prone to mistakes, that grew and developed all over the place, following no rule. He hated it. And he hated it even more here in the smithy, the only place where Mairon had, until now, been safe from those nuisances, where he could control the substance of Arda, make it perfect. Also, the fact that it had been Aulë himself who had made this mistake made Mairon deeply uneasy, embarrassed. The Master was never supposed to make mistakes, if he was fallible, so were they all. And all the other Maiar were actually laughing…

All of a sudden, Mairon felt as if he were suffocating, and he left the others in a haste, trying to calm himself, to fight down the panic that started to well up in him. It had happened. The imperfect had entered their domain. Now all would fall apart… and then, suddenly, he heard a voice in his head. “You seem scared, little Maia? What happened to you?” “My Lord Melkor…” he said, uncertain what he should do, whether he should bow to him or not. He knew the Valar called Melkor dangerous, but then, weren’t they themselves? Had they not just proven that they would allow all their hard work come to nothing because they were just too lax? And before he knew it, he poured his heart out to the Vala, feeling already more at home with him than he had ever felt with Aulë, a feeling that deepened with every compassionate word of understanding Melkor uttered.

(note here: this is NOT supposed to be an excuse for Sauron’s later deeds, nor a POV that makes him the victim. Autism doesn’t make you an arsehole any more than it saves you from being one, but it does make you more susceptible to certain lures, especially if those lures promise safety)