#the ending is very dookie and there’s a lot of run-ons but we move !!!

[hubookunaluwawa]

the horrifying realization that someone genuinely knows you

it wasn’t supposed to go this way. it was supposed to be easy. casual. fun. but now, you feel like puking. because the second those forbidden words left his lips while he was buried deep inside of you, after a night of the both of you pretending not to know how the other felt, all hell broke loose in your heart. you were able to keep your composure through the end, but once he cleaned you up and fell asleep, you quickly grabbed your stuff and got the hell out of dodge.

your throat tightens up, and your eyes start to sting as you head for the bus stop. one minute passes. then five, and then ten. and then, as if this night hadn’t been bad enough, droplets of rain began to drizzle from the sky. this bus couldn’t be coming any fucking slower, you think, and you nervously tap the side of your leg, hoping with all your might that he didn’t realize you left, because if he did–

“y/n?”

fuck.

“hey!” you feign innocence as you quickly glance at him, “what’re you doing up?”

“i could ask you the exact same thing,” he returns, his smile masking something foreign… something vulnerable.

“oh, well, yeah, i mean, i have an 8 am class, so i have to head back to my place.” you feel your easygoing facade beginning to crumble as you continue to stare straight ahead at the road. you felt gross, lying to someone you always felt so comfortable around. you just hope he doesn’t realize it before the bus gets here.

“really?”

“yep!”

“i mean, i thought you said you don’t like doing… this…” he motions between the two of you, “the morning before an early class. said it fucks up your internal clock and stuff,” he remarks in a tone that makes it crystal clear he’s not buying a word you say.

you turn to look at him once again, and he’s staring at you with a hooded unwavering gaze that you’d mistake for apathy if you didn’t know him any better. unfortunately, you do know him better: enough to notice that the unfamiliar look in his eyes is blatant fear, as if he thinks you could disappear at any moment. and then, how much he knows you hits you all at once, and you’re left a scared little kid with no idea what to do.

“yeah, i guess i just forgot.” you’d have to be in complete denial to think he couldn’t hear the distinct crack in your voice, fake smile be damned. the two of you stare at each other for what feels like hours until the tears threatening to spill from your eyes make you look away.

“y/n.” but his eyes are still on you.

“mhm?” don’t.

“y/n, please.” only on you.

i can’t.

“i need you to tell me if i just fucked everything up back there.” the desperation in his voice is unmistakable, making you catch your breath. your face falls, and your heart hurts more than you ever thought possible.

“why’d you say it,” you whisper, “why’d you have to go and say it?” and his heart shatters at the brokenness of your voice because it was him who did this shit to you.

“when we started this, we promised it wouldn’t turn into anything. and it was fine when it was just me feeling something, but it won’t work with the both of us–”

“why?” something’s changed. he’s angry. “why won’t it work? why can’t we let it work?”

“because shit like this never does!” you scream, and you can feel everything you’ve been bottling up inside for the past few months escaping your body in one go.

“it never does,” you say with a quiet laugh. “we’d get together, and then you’d get bored with me–”

“i could never get bored with you–”

“–or i’d get bored with you,” you continue while noticing the fleeting look of hurt in his eyes that’s quickly overshadowed by anger, “and then we’d only be with each other out of obligation. we’d be ruining a really good thing just for the chance of something different, so just forget it, because whatever… it is that you feel won’t last,” you say as if it’s the funniest thing in the world while gesturing towards him.

“oh, fuck you.” he laughs, tugging his hair in frustration.

“fuck you!” you retort, delirious from the fact that this conversation is even happening at all.

“no, fuck you for trying to tell me that what i feel isn’t real.”

“okay,” you scoff as you begin to walk away. you don’t know where you headed, but as long as he’s not there, you know it’s where you need to be.

“and fuck you for making me love you! in more ways than just one!”

you freeze for probably the 50th time tonight, and you finally look at him again to see the shine in his eyes as he speaks.

“please don’t disappear when i tell you this,” he practically whispers to you with a once-again fearful look.

and you don’t. you’ve heard your fair share of “i love yous” in your life, and they all meant the same, substanceless, conditional thing. and so, the more you heard it, the less you believed it. you’ve seen relationships–both yours and those of the people you care about–fall apart because people will romantically love those that they don’t even like platonically. so you believed, and continue to believe, that romantic love without a platonic basis is an incredibly common recipe for disaster. you know this, and yet, you don’t think you could run from him right now even if you tried.

“i’ve never felt what i’ve felt for you with anybody else. i think about you all the time. like, you’re the first thing i think about in the morning and the last thing on my mind every night. and whenever i see you, it feels like what everybody talks about in the movies and the songs, and it’s like the heavens open up and everything makes sense and my world’s brighter because you’re in it. i’m completely and utterly head-over-heels in love with you.”

he just thinks he is, you try to remind yourself, but this shit isn’t real. it’s just infatuation, a burst of attraction, a trick of the mind. it’ll go away eventually–

“but it’s not just infatuation like you always say.” you mentally curse him for being able to read your mind and peel back your layers so easily, but he takes a step closer to you as he speaks.

“because you’re also the one person i feel most comfortable around. i could be having the worst day of my life and seeing you for a few minutes would make it the best, because everything about you makes me happy! everything! i mean your smile and your eyes and the way you giggle at the corniest jokes and the little crinkle you get on your forehead when i say something dumb and… how you make me feel safe enough to talk to you and know you won’t think i’m crazy, and how passionate you get about the things and people you care about: all of it has me completely obsessed with you, and all i know is that i wanna keep making you breakfast in the mornings and holding you close at night and going on late night drives with you and hearing you laugh because your laugh makes me feel like i’m dreaming whenever i hear it and i can’t help but laugh too because i just can’t believe that, out of everybody on this planet, you keep choosing to be here with me and i just… i love you, y/n. and even if this doesn’t last, i wanna be with you for as long as i’m able, because it doesn’t feel like my love for you is ever gonna go away.” 

and he breathes out the final declaration with a confidence that leaves you stunned because holy shit you’re actually starting to believe him. you can’t tell whether the wetness on your face is from the pouring rain or your own tears. maybe it’s both. but all you know is that, now, he’s holding your heart in his hands. and the scariest part is that he’s holding it with as much care as he’d treat his own heart. no, as much care as you want to treat his. and then, he starts to ramble, which you’re sure you’ve never seen him do (in fact, you’re pretty sure this is the most you’ve ever heard him speak).

you can’t stop yourself from looking at his lips, and the space between you grows smaller and smaller until it ceases to exist.

“i mean, it’s like you’re branded on my heart. you have this insane amount of control over me and i’m constantly wanting to be around you and hold you and make you happy because you feel like home to me but in the best way possible and i just want to be that for you too, and if you don’t feel the same way, that’s completely cool, and we could just forget this conversation ever happened, because you’re also my best friend and i don’t wanna lose you, and i–”

your lips taste sweet against his, and your hands cup his cheeks with a delicateness that makes him feel like crying, and he feels happier than he thinks he’s ever felt because he knows what this kiss means.

you take a moment to break apart, the tip of your nose brushing against his as he chases after your lips, and you desperately proclaim, “i’d never get bored of you either. i love you. i love you. you’re all i want.”

the bus you were waiting on passes you both by, and he meets your lips again, sighing into the kiss with relief. and you both make a silent promise, right then and there, to never let each other go again.

[gayenerd]

This is the interview with Adrienne that is teased in that Mankato punk blog I talked about awhile ago.

Green Day frontman's wife remembers Mankato

By Amanda Dyslin

The Free Press

July 01, 2009 04:38 pm

— Adrienne Nesser, living in Mankato in her early 20s, had a long-distance friendship and flirtation with a guy so interested in her, he and his band planned tours around Minnesota just so he could see her.

Green Day wasn’t famous at the time. In Adrienne’s own words, they were just another band she had seen a couple of times in the Cities.

They were both also seeing other people. But there was something pretty powerful that must have connected them over a distance of thousands of miles. There had to be. Otherwise, she never would have agreed to leave her home state of Minnesota to move to California to be with him.

Just weeks later, they were married July 2, 1994, Adrienne was pregnant with the couple’s first of two sons, and Green Day’s album “Dookie” became a household name. All of this seemed to happen over night.

Finding Adrienne and talking to her about all of this was a big part of our Campaign Green Day mission. (See accompanying story for background.) Today, we accomplish that goal as Adrienne talks to us about life in Mankato, including her favorite Pagliai’s pizza toppings, how quickly her life changed when she headed West, and also the big question we’ve been pursuing for weeks: Would Green Day ever come back to Mankato to play a show?

Free Press: Tell me a little bit about your college experience at Minnesota State University. Were you a studier? A partier? On the student senate?

Adrienne Armstrong: I was a transfer student to MSU. I was at the U of M for a few semesters, then Minneapolis Community College. I was dating my then boyfriend who lived in Mankato, so it seemed a good place to go to finish my degree.

I loved school, especially when I was in the more focused classes of my degree. And I was definitely a partier. I found it easy to balance both. I loved the What’s Up, and for the life of me can’t remember the name of the bar across from Pagliai’s that I absolutely loved. (Square Deal?)

I graduated in 1993, but I had turned in a paper after one of my classes ended, and the professor never posted the grade. I had to call the school to argue the fact. They finally sent my degree in 1996.

FP: Why sociology? What interested you about the subject and what career did you have in mind?

AA: I have always loved the dynamics of social groups, clicks and society classes. It’s what triggered my interest in social justice and being an activist. I really didn’t have any career in mind while going through college. Occasionally, I would think of getting a credential to teach, but it was always a fleeting idea.

FP: You seemed to have a ton of jobs while you were here. Your Mankato friends have listed Pier 1 Imports, the Piercing Pagonda, Pagliai’s and The Jungle among them. Am I missing any? Any favorites?

AA: I really only had a few jobs in Mankato. It was hard for me to find a job because I had dreadlocks and dressed kinda funky. So the first place that took a chance on me was The Jungle and the bowling alley. It was a trip. I really liked working there, and the bowlers warmed up to me.

I worked at Pagliai’s all through college, and that was super fun. I worked with lots of my friends and the pizza was awesome. I worked at Pier 1 after I graduated. I was a manager there. I loved that job. I was hired at the very beginning; we put the store together from the ground up. The people I worked with were fun, and I loved running the store. I remember unloading a truck full of merchandise with 70 below windchills. The whole town was shut down. Good times!

FP: Do you have any favorite moments in Mankato? Any night or event or time that really stands out for you when you think about your college years?

AA: My entire experience of living in Mankato was fantastic. I loved living there. It was a small town with such a heart. Camping in our friends T-PEE, the festivals in Sibley Park, tubing in the storm drains, biking, which seemed, at the time, the biggest hill to campus, and the really cool friends/people I hung out with.

FP: I read you met Billie Joe in 1990 at a show in Minneapolis. Had you heard his music before that show? How famous would you say Green Day was at the time?

AA: I met Green Day for the first time at a house party in Dinkytown. A friend of mine invited me to a party on the Fourth of July. So I went with my boyfriend at the time to check out the bands.

I saw a couple songs, then we left to watch fireworks. The next day they played The Varsity. I ended up going to that show, too. My friend, Erica, introduced me to the guys that day. I wouldn’t say they were famous.

I mean, I went to a lot of shows ... saw a lot of bands. They were just another band. This was the first time they played Minnesota.

FP: Was it difficult having a relationship long-distance when Billie Joe was on tour after you’d first met?

AA: Billie Joe and I were friends first. And never tried to be exclusive. I was in a dwindling relationship that was off and on. And I know he dated many other girls. We grew over time. After I graduated from college, I finalized the break-up with my longtime boyfriend and was single for almost a year. During that time, I saw Billie Joe a few times, but it wasn’t until I moved out to California that things solidified pretty quickly.

FP: I couldn’t get anyone to clear this up for me: Was it because of you that Green Day started coming to Mankato and playing shows? Or was Mankato a part of their early touring locations?

AA: Umm ... probably. : )

He booked a mini tour that started in Sioux Falls, S.D., and then came through Mankato, Minneapolis, to Beloit, Wis. So yes, to see me. Very Romantic ... .

FP: Talking to people around here now, it seems like the band was playing shows everywhere here in town: garages, basements and that show on a farm near St. Peter. Was it really like that? Or was it just a few shows that just sort of popped up when they happened to be here?

AA: Green Day always played anywhere, any time. So when they were in town as a band they would play garages, basements, street corners and even that farm on top of spools. Billie Joe came to Mankato a few times on his own for visits as well.

FP: Did you have any idea in the early days of your relationship that Green Day was going to hit the big time?

AA: I really didn’t think of it. I just knew that I loved the band and their music. They were so fun to watch live. ... But it wasn’t in my thoughts at all what their future held. I remember being with a friend in Minneapolis, and we were watching MTV, and their “Basket Case” video came on. It freaked us out. We were like “Oh My God, how crazy!! They are on TV!”

FP: A few people who knew you said your decision to move out West to marry Billie Joe happened quickly. It was like one minute you were here and then you were gone. Was that how you remember it, too? Were you scared?

AA: Billie Joe had asked me to move out to California and give us a try. I was Totally scared. But super excited. It was a new adventure, and I was ready. I had a big garage sale — sold as much as I could, including my favorite blue creepers, packed a mini U-Haul and drove out with my 15-year-old brother and my friend, Holly, who was already making the trip. I figured I’d give it the summer and see what happened.

FP: It seems as if shortly after you were married “Green Day” and “Dookie” became household names. What was that time like for you? Was it strange to suddenly be living the life of a celebrity? Is it still strange?

AA: I was out two weeks and Billie Joe asked me to marry him. It was crazy. But it was a crazy time for us — and I said yes. It was a whirlwind. I was pregnant, and his band was everywhere. It was completely overwhelming. We were just trying to navigate it all — it was a bumpy ride for sure. It took years for us to find our footing. ... But sometimes I think it was all those trials that made us stronger and brought us to where we are today.

FP: What’s your life like now?

AA: It feels pretty normal for me now. I am a mother of two amazing kids. So I am busy with school, sports and all their activities. And Billie Joe’s life keeps us busy. It’s never boring ... that’s for sure.

FP: What are your roles at Atomic Garden and Adeline Records? Does that keep you pretty busy?

AA: My friend and I are partners in Atomic Garden. She’s a very good friend who is amazing and patient. I work as much as I can when I am in town, and we do all the buying together. We have an incredible manager who does most of the day-to-day stuff. She allows us to live our lives and still have such a beautiful store. I don’t do anything with Adeline Records anymore. I worked the label for years when it first started. But I have moved on. : )

FP: Do you still keep in contact with anyone from the Mankato area?

AA: I keep in touch with a few people. But sadly lost touch with a lot of them.

FP: And now for the $65,000 question. What do you think our chances are of getting Green Day to come back to Mankato to play a show some time? Are small markets like ours pretty much out of the question at this point?

AA: I would love to imagine Green Day playing Mankato again. I don’t think it’s out of the question. They still play small clubs and stuff. They are still the same in that way — they will play anywhere. It’s more just the logistics of it all.

FP: How about you? Could we get you to come back some time? How about a big party catered by Pagliai’s?

AA: I would LOVE to get back to Mankato for a visit. So let’s keep in touch and make this happen! It’s been too long since I had a Pagliai’s pizza with onion, green olive and extra sauce. Cheryl Rueda made me the BEST pizzas!!!!!

Copyright � 1999-2008 cnhi, inc.

Photos

Adrienne Armstrong lives in California and co-owns Atomic Garden, an eco-friendly clothing store, with a friend.

[windup-dragoon]

I vomited words out. There had been a clear decision of where I was going with this, then I lost it and found it again at the end???? Idk. PLEASE EXCUSE MY INABILITY TO WRITE ACTION. IT’S AWFUL AND CRINGE PLEASE I KNOW. But thanks @vestaloflight​ for the drabble prompt! It also has to do with Kirishimi’s backstory a bit. Isho and Az’hala are both OC’s of mine that I rarely talk about. Isho having been my retainer that I fell in love with. He’s a big gruff boi who idolizes Tataru for her money keeping skills. Az’hala is a ninja cat boi who’s pretty goofy. Lowkey ship him with Yugiri kek BUT THAT’S A DIFFERENT STORY. 

Anyway, here’s today’s dookie story. 

【Ｓｈａｔｔｅｒｅｄ　Ｍｅｍｏｒｉｅｓ】

Hien x Kirishimi 

Word Count:  3,341 (IT’S ACCURATE THIS TIME) 

Daydreams occupied his mind that afternoon, taunting and beckoning him to cast all else aside. Fantasies of her clouded his green eyes, her laugh a melody that only he could hear. If he were careful, as he diligently tried to be, the scent of vanilla and cinnamon, the scent of her, still held traces over his robes. Who knew such common aroma’s could spark such a state of entrancement? 

He had long since said his goodbyes to her that morning, leaving only after stealing half a dozen kisses or more. But oh, his heart yearned for more. Hours, minutes, even seconds longer in the rosy glow of the rising sun. Time he would have spent memorizing every inch of her skin. From the silvery silk of scars that decorated her flesh, to the petal soft curves she hid away beneath layers of armor and cloth. The sensation of her lips against his, sharing a single breath a thousand times over again. 

But duty had demanded their attention. His were stately by nature while hers had brought her out to the Ruby Sea. Word had it that visitors awaited her arrival, in desperate shape for the aid of the Scions. Hien could only begin to imagine what that would entail. 

Considering her loyalty to the Scions had given him enough strength to endure his own tasks for the day, drab as they may have been in comparison. Yet even while his guests spoke freely before him, chatting among themselves, he found himself once again at the mercy of her fleeting visage just beneath closed eyes. 

–

“Whaddya ‘suppose they want?” Inquired the sandy haired miqo’te, Az’hala, all but skipping in pace with his companions. 

Ahead of him, as if leading the small collection of scions to war, marched the ever stoic Isho, an auri raen with flamboyantly pink hair and diamondesque scales. Not even a step behind Isho, nearly at his shoulders in height, was Kirishimi, one of several Warriors of Light. 

“Who knows?” Kirishimi remarked, flashing Az’hala a grin over her shoulder. “Maybe someone needs help fishin’?” She teased. 

“Doubtful.” Rumbled Isho in response, his fellows frowning immediately. “They requested Kirishimi personally.” 

“Yeah…About that?” Az’hala squeaked, prancing up to Isho and peering up at the towering man. “How did they even know she was here? Mistress Tataru? Lil’ Alphinaud? Alisaie, perhaps?” 

Kiri leaned forward in her strides, enough to catch a glimpse of her companion across Isho’s broad chest. “I’ve been wonderin’ that myself. Tataru and Alphinaud usually let us know about visitors. This time I hadn’t heard a peep.” 

None of her companions had. Instead, word had been given to Isho who had been in Kugane on business. A member of the confederate pirates had passed along the message that visitors had arrived for her. Reluctant as he was to play errand boy Isho knew exactly where to find the snow haired woman. In the arms of a certain prince. 

“T-They must have seen ya’ passin’ through!” Az’hala tried to sound convincing, but sky blue eyes revealed that not even he could pass it off as mere coincidence.  

Ankle deep in sea water, trekking their way along the shores of Bekko, Isho gave pause. Where the ruby seas met land of the isle, two stood in wait for their arrival. Just as the pirate had made mention. Flanked on his sides, Kiri and Az’hala stopped short. 

Neither party seemed eager to greet the other. Clouds overhead had begun to gather, Heaven-on-high a mere silhouette in the distance. Kirishimi could smell it on the breeze, just as Eyriwolk had taught her many years ago; a storm was approaching. 

Although tension in her shoulders and an itch in her hand told her to draw her lance, Kirishimi ignored her intuition to offer a small smile to the figures in red cloaks. Ascians? Unlikely. But who else was known for being so dramatic in fashion? 

“Greetings!” Kiri attempted her best impersonation of Alphinaud. She felt unpleasant and stiff in doing so. “Am I to presume you are Lani and Edea? Lookin’ for The Scions?” Kirishimi gestured vaguely at her company. Az’hala gave a meek wave, peeking out from the shadow of Isho’s lumbering form. Isho made a low guttural noise. Ever the eloquent one. 

Droplets began to prick at Kirishimi’s face and splattered across her darkened dragoon armor, icy beads of rain getting caught in her lashes. What started as a sprinkle soon became an onslaught. The waves of the Ruby Sea churning, gurgling, and lashing against the shore. 

“Aye! You must be the Warrior of Light, yes?” The taller of the two moved forward and cast aside her hood. “‘Bout time I was granted an audience with ya’.” 

The trio stood frozen, air caught in their throats at sight of the womans features. Blue piercing eyes, locks of quick silver cropped at her jawline, tan skin with the faintest trace of light freckles dusting her cheekbones. If not for the pronounced nose and high arched brows of a Roegadyn, she could have easily been Kirishimi’s doppelganger. 

“W-What? Am I seein’ things, Isho?” Az’hala promptly rubbed his eyes as if rain had diluted his vision. 

“Afraid not.” The woman answered without a moments hesitation. “If you’d like, we have no business with the lot of ya’. The ever popular champion of Eorzea will suffice.” Howling wind and roaring waves tore at the woman’s cloak as she spoke. She reached up, a fox grin plastered on her lips, and let loose the fabric that tore at her neck. Armor trimmed with fur and fashioned with an angled cut skirt had been hidden beneath the discarded garment, along with an ax that hugged her back. It was more a cleaver than an ax but nearly as large as she. 

Isho responded quickly. His sword and shield promptly drawn at the mere sight of such a monstrosity of a weapon. Kiri slowly reached for the lance at her back. 

“Az’hala,” The dragoon spoke in a clipped tone, low even against the crashing storm that drifted closer. “Go.” 

– 

Hien was nearing his limit with this meeting. How many times could this very topic be addressed? Trade had been sparse immediately following Doma’s liberation, but it had long since been handled. Their markets had begun to flourish even! But, given all that his people had gone through in his absence, he could only imagine the lingering fear that plagued their minds. The ‘what if’s. What if it happened again? What if supplies ran low? What if trade stopped? 

Just as his lips parted in answer to the posed question, the doors to his meeting room were thrown wide. Yugiri presented herself, kneeling and bowing her head with some urgency behind her actions. 

“Lord Hien, forgive my intrusion, but trouble is brewing at the Ruby Sea.” 

The Ruby Sea? Had the pirates started acting up? He could hear his comrades murmur curiously to themselves. None in his company seemed worried by the news, but Hien found his stomach suddenly in knots. His mouth went dry, throat tightening as his jaw tensed. 

“Pray, excuse me my friends. I will see to this matter immediately. We will continue our discussion at a later time.” It was maddening to the prince. Forcing himself to remain calm and collected in that moment. Instead of letting his body spirit him away in a heartbeat out the door and all the way to the Ruby Sea. Where Kirishimi had gone. No, despite the overwhelming distress he felt, he reserved himself and begged apology. 

He was at Yugiri’s heels as they left. The Doman Enclave seemed quiet outside his meeting hall, peaceful even against the pounding of his heart in his ears. 

“Az’hala returned in a panic,” The ebony haired shinobi explained. With a gesture she pointed out Az’hala leaning against the nearest wall, pitched over as if sick. 

“K-Kiri… Oi, I’m gonna heave…” Az’hala breathed, choking on the emergency that riddled his voice. “Some batty lady is threatenin’ Kiri. Isho…” A pant interrupted him. He gulped, ears twitching. “Isho stayed with her….” 

Hien tilted his head with a cocked brow. “You left her?” He hadn’t known Az’hala very long. All he had known was that he had studied under Yugiri for a time during her stay in Eorzea. He hadn’t quite mastered the ways of the shinobi as Yugiri had, evident by his weak stomach for running, but Kirishimi had placed faith in him time and time again. So then why would he abandon his comrade? 

Az’hala’s tail gave a sharp flick of annoyance. “She told me-” That same snapping, twitching tail suddenly went stock-still while a convulsion ripped through the young mans body. Stomach content and saliva splattered the stone of the Enclave. 

“I believe she may be in trouble.” Yugiri continued, turning away from Az’hala’s disaster. “Or that she may have reason to believe as much. Mayhap she was asking Az’hala to bring assistance?” 

“We lack information.” Admitted the prince with a sigh. Ignoring the gurgling sounds behind him, Hien nodded, a flame suddenly igniting in his mossy eyes. “Let us see for ourselves what is transpiring.” 

– 

Lightning shot overhead, thunder drumming only a few short malms from the isle. Rain pelted bare flesh, running like watercolor in brushstrokes of crimson down the crest of her cheek and along her left arm. Pieces of shattered metal had embedded themselves in the sand, soon to be washed away by the tide. Her armor was all but shredded thanks to Lani and her cleaving ax. 

Yalms away she could hear the familiar twinkling sounds of magic being spent. The other visitor, yet clad in her cloak, landed spell after dizzying spell upon Isho and his raised shield. Each successful hit mimicked a war drum that rang in her ears. 

“Sweets, you do not have the luxury to watch yer friend.” 

Kiri had barely turned back to Lani and react. The cleaving blade of hers bit deep against the metal shaft of her lance, the vibration of impact making her arms numb. She ground her teeth, the balls of her feet nearly buried in the wet sand as she stood against the force of the vertical swing. 

“Exhausted yet, Warrior? You look an awful mess in this rain.” Lani mused with something of a laugh. 

“I’ve seen you before…” Growled Kirishimi in response. 

“Ever look in the mirror?” The axe lifted, the grinding stopping for a brief moment. Thunder roared as the blade crashed down a second time, then a third. With each impact Kiri could feel her lance splintering. It would break clean in half at any given moment. “I know all about you! Kirishimi Yasuragi, a famed Warrior of Light! You won the hearts of those in Eorzea, even Ishgard and their silly lil’ dragons! Now a champion of Doma as well, from what I hear. Greedy lil’ shite, aren’t’cha?” 

“What do you want?!” Each ring of axe against lance had the dragoon flinching. If her own weapon didn’t break soon, her injured arm would. Already she could feel the ache setting in. 

Posed with such a question had Lani halt her assault. “I want yer end. Yer story should have ended that day.” Blue eyes were suddenly distant. Recalling a memory. A vision that Kiri would be subjected to. 

Like the dull ache of a migraine she felt its approach. Kiri squeezed shut her eyes, begging Hydaelyn to take back this cursed blessing. It washed over her in a heartbeat. One minute she was on the shores of the Ruby Sea, the next, standing in a field of tall, dried grass. 

A literal sea of pale yellow surrounded two children, a hushed breeze rolling through the grass like ocean waves. The smaller of the two had stooped low to the ground, rivers of tears turning dirt to mud on her cheeks. Her elder stood cross armed, glaring down at her. 

But the Echo faded just as abruptly as it had begun. Kirishimi looked up from her lowered position before Lani, kneeling to better take another hit from her ax. The scene was familiar. To Lani perhaps it was poetic. To Kirishimi, who felt only a hollow ache in the pit of her heart for the small weeping child, it was a tragedy. What had Lani done to that girl crying in the fields? 

“Don’t you dare look at me with those damnable eyes! You freak! Bloody monster!!” Lani screamed out to the storm, ax over her head. In one swoop she brought it down; a hammer to a nail. 

Sparks showered the sand, fizzling out in the clapping waves of the sea around her. Kiri, who had braced for impact, blinked mismatched eyes. She half expected her lance to be in two, as well as herself. But yet here she remained in tact. Time itself felt as if it had stopped. The pounding of her heart, nearly feral with the drive to survive, only echoed with exhaustion. 

Kirishimi cocked her head upright, expecting to see Lani looming over her, ready to decimate. But instead she was greeted with a familiar sight. One that roused a tired smile to her bloodied lips. Yellow and black fabric.

“Hien!” 

– 

Aye. The prince himself, his blade keeping Lani’s ax at bay in a burst of sparks and hissing metal. With a slick twist of his wrist the katana threw aside the woman’s ax, it’s heft dragging in the sands at her feet. 

“Are you well enough to stand?” Hien’s voice, normally soft and cheerful, was low and short. Anger ripped his vocals. It took his whole being to keep from snarling at the ax wielding woman. He had only seen Kirishimi defeated once during his time with her. In the arms of another, being spirited away to far away lands. He swore it would be the last time she suffered so. 

Kirishimi did not reply however. Instead, granted this small opening against Lani, the dragoon took to the sky. Her lance was sure to break but this fighting needed to end. She was desperate for answers. Why Lani and Edea felt compelled to single her out, to attack so unannounced but with such determination. Answers that only Lani could give her. 

“Kirishimi!” The voice of the au ra called against drumming thunder. 

In a blink of an eye, with her target in sight, Kirishimi no longer felt the pin prick sensation of rain pelting her skin. Instead her body suddenly chilled, encased in layers of ice. Sizzling magic rolled from each newly formed layer of ice. Kirishimi need not turn her eyes to know where the magic had originated from. Edea had turned her focus from Isho long enough to stop the Dragoon. 

Like a wingless bird, she plummeted. 

Shards of ice sparkled like diamonds around her as she crashed to the sand. Her vision blurred, a burning white sensation filling her mind as bones snapped from the height and force of the fall. 

“Kiri!” Hien pitched himself forward, his feet moving before he could realize what had happened. 

“She even has the prince of Doma at her beck and call.” Scoffed the woman, heaving her giant ax to its rightful place on her back. “What a disgrace.” 

Isho had reached the Warrior of Lights side well before Hien could, causing the prince to take pause and listen to the woman mock his dragoon. He half turned toward her, brows furrowed and eyes ablaze. 

Lani barked with laughter at the sight. “Don’t give me that pathetic look! If I were a betting woman, I’d wager you haven’t a clue who you invite into your bed at night. Kirishimi? The Warrior of Light? Champion? Kilika? My, she has an awful lot of names. Wonder which is truly hers. Which do you see when you look at her? All I see is a rabid animal that needs to be put down.” 

Anger burned the samurai’s heart. A flame that raced through his veins and clouded his mind. 

“… If you won’t permit me to slay her now, then yer just standin’ in my way.” 

It happened in a blink of an eye. Hien had prided himself in fast reflexes, even his talent for the sword came almost naturally to him. But in that mere heartbeat of a moment, all he could manage was his blade against Lani’s withdrawing arm. Her arm which had buried a knife in his abdomen. 

How had she moved in such ways? Like lightning on her feet she struck without remorse. An arch of blood fell from her arm where his blade caught flesh but little more. A paper cut compared to the knife hilt deep in his gut. She had even broken through his chest piece. The carapace of a beetle broken beneath the force of a heel. Blood blossomed in the white fur of his robes and welled in his hand. 

Lani, nursing her now sliced wrist, scowled at the dazed prince. “You can keep that for now. I’ll be back for it another time.” 

His vision blurred. The rain blotted out the fleeting visage of this warrior woman. He could feel his lungs fill with salty air. A slow, exhausting task that left him feeling numb. Who was that woman? His knees buckled beneath him, his body crumpling into the sand. Why did she look like Kirishimi? Faintly he could still hear her voice. The day dream that plagued him and visited his deepest dreams. She called him now, a song that was drowning in the pouring rain and sloshing tide. 

“Hien! By the Twelve, Hien!” 

“Kirishimi, stop moving!” 

“No! Lemme go, Isho! Hien!!” 

“You’ll puncture your gods-dammed lung, you fool woman!” 

“HIEN!” 

Hands, shaking and frail, cupped his cheeks. For a moment he felt warmth, the blood of hers smearing like paint beneath her fingertips. Through hooded, bleary eyes he could make her out against the rolling grays of the stormy sky. Crimson painted her lips and coated her cheeks. But all he could focus on was the color of her eyes. Red like fire, blue like ice. Oh and that intoxicating aroma. 

“…Vanilla and cinnamon.” 

“Hien! Please, you have’ta stay awake! Listen to me, talk to me, tell me a stupid story! Anythin’ at all!! I swear, I’ll have everyone in Doma call you Shun if you don’t keep yer eyes open!!” 

At this, the prince groaned, coughing on rain. A slight smile on his lips. “How… embarrassing that would be…” His eyes fluttered with exhaustion, though he longed to keep admiring the woman hovering over him. “All will be well…” 

Kirishimi’s voice hitched with a hiccup, a shudder racking her body. “Well?! It is not well! You are not okay, Hien! We need to get you out of here!! Isho!! Can you carry-” 

“Shh…” With what little energy was left to him, Hien raised a hand and waved it off. “Let me… Let me just enjoy this beautiful goddess the kami have blessed me with. If only a moment?” 

“Do either of you have any idea how poorly this will reflect on The Scions?” Isho interjected, busy directing a sudden swarm of pirates and shinobi. “We practically murdered a prince.” 

“Isho!” Kirishimi snarled. She lowered her head, lightly touching her forehead to Hien’s. “Hien, hang on… I’m beggin’ you.” 

“Mmm…. Only if the goddess commands it of the prince.” Try as he might to will his eyes open, he found himself too tired to manage. Again his eyes fluttered, briefly catching a glimpse of Kirishimi’s burdened expression. Tears and blood leaving streaks across her cheeks. 

“Of course I command you to stay. Remain in the world of mortals with me.” She hiccuped a response, playing into this silly idea of his. 

But her words brought a smile to his lips. Small, but warm. She loved when he smiled. “I will remain at your side always… My moon and stars.” 

Somewhere behind Kirishimi he could hear Isho snort in disgust. “You sound as foolish as Magnai. Both of you.”