#the danhausen mask on the side????

[homoeroticgrappling]

LET'S FUCKIN GO???

[aerodaltonimperial]

(@perhapswhoknowsvamp and I have the best slash worst text threads ever. We realized that Danhausen isn't following Jack on IG today and spiraled.)

Danhausen follows Orange Cassidy. Danhausen follows Hook. Danhausen follows most people on the roster, really.

Danhausen does not follow Jack Perry.

++

Actually, he used to. Danhausen follows and unfollows Jack once a week, just so Jack gets the notifications. Since he’s bored and couch-bound currently, he’s upgraded to doing it every half hour like clockwork. He sends bitchy messages at 3 AM and then blocks Jack so he can’t reply.

Hope Jungle Jack gets some sleep. Would be a shame if someone STOLE that from him.

Jack, whose phone dings for the third time that morning: “THIS MOTHERFUCKER”

++

When he’s on the pain meds, he sends more messages. Has Jack checked his brake lines recently? and This picture of you is quite nice and it’s a cockroach wearing a top hat. (Danhausen doodled the hat on the cockroach.) Behind the cockroach is a jungle, and a large bird of prey with red black and white head feathers.

Jack forwards the message to Hook, with the text: WILL YOU PLEASE JUST TELL HIM THAT WE AREN’T DATING AND ALSO THAT WE AREN’T EVEN TAG PARTNERS ANYMORE

Hook replies with sorry the number you have sent this to is no longer in service R.I.P.

++

Hook sends a follow-up text: the hat does look nice on you.

Jack: “They fucking deserve each other.”

++

Darby eventually slides into Danhausen’s DMs. dude could you stop he is profoundly unsexy when he is this stressed out.

Danhausen: whatever he is profoundly unsexy ALL THE TIME. You should get one that looks sexy more often, then. Darby obviously has poor taste. Perhaps he should talk to Hook. The two of you could become best friends with your new jungle infatuation.

Darby: Is that what this is about? Hook?

Danhausen blocks Darby.

++

Jack finds Hook. He hasn’t slept in days. He is mid-mental breakdown. “PLEASE. I can’t even ask him what he wants! He keeps blocking me before I can tell him that you and I are not a thing. Call him, for fuck’s sake.”

Hook: “I don’t got reception.”

Jack: “YOU HAVEN’T EVEN LOOKED AT YOUR PHONE?”

Hook, cupping a hand over his ear: “What? Sorry. You’re breaking up. They must be updating the towers around here. Anyway, I’ll talk to you later.”

After he walks away, Jack stares. “This fucking guy.”

++

Darby drops down from the fucking ceiling. Jack has a heart attack.

Darby, unaffected: “Sounds like things aren’t going any better on Team Chips. Man, these guys are dense.”

Jack: “….what??”

Darby rolls his eyes. “I’m on Team Teeth, you’re on Team Chips. What, did you think we were going to be on the same side? Over my dead body.”

Jack: “….I—”

++

Darby makes a decision. “Actually…” He looks Jack up and down. “Yeah, I take that back. You can be over me any time you’d like. I’d let you top.”

Jack: “...wha—”

Darby: “I’ll call Danhausen the next time he unblocks me and see what I can do. Again. Idiots.” He fucks off down a hallway on a skateboard that seemingly materialized out of thin air.

Jack: “I…I am so tired.”

++

Danhausen ends up blocking half the roster as they try to get him and Hook back together. By the end, he’s only following a handful: OC (who doesn’t give a shit), MJF (who also doesn’t give a shit but for different reasons), and RJ City (who actually did attempt to get them back together but after he got blocked, he stood crying in Danhausen’s front yard until Danhausen unblocked him. He has not brought it up again).

He also still follows Taz. Taz sent him one message last summer: Sorry. He’s an idiot. He’ll come around.

++

Taz has not been cursed since he sent the message.

++

Jack considers checking himself into the psych ward because they’ll take his phone on intake and maybe he’ll be able to sleep. He walks into the lobby and spots an attending nurse wearing a face mask and hovering nearby, shoulders hunched…and arm in a sling.

Jack nearly cries while leaving the building. He just wants to sleep.

++

Jack, texting Hook: HE FOLLOWED ME TO THE PSYCH WARD.

Darby: sounds hot

Jack: FUCK WRONG NUMBER

++

Jack, texting Hook: HE FOLLOWED ME TO THE PSYCH WARD.

Hook: sounds hot

++

Hook: wait, who followed you?

Jack: DANHAUSEN

Hook: Oh…

Jack: OH? THAT’S ALL YOU CAN SAY, OH? NOT, WHY WERE YOU GOING TO A PSYCH WARD IN THE FIRST PLACE, JACK?

Hook: Sorry

Jack: You’re a shit friend.

Hook: yeah

Jack: He was pretending to be a god damn nurse in the lobby.

Hook: a nurse?

Jack: Yes.

Hook: what was he wearing?

Jack: I hate you.

++

Jack goes to Home Depot. He just wants to sleep. He breaks into one of the outdoor sheds in the parking lot. It’s cold.

++

There’s no cell reception in the shed.

++

Jack is happy.

[tache-noire]

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED FOR WIP WEDNESDAY....

thank you @thayli-ra!!! (i can't tag you for some reason) tagginggggg @powderflower, @pepsi-maxwell, @dilf-in-peril @cmgirlie and @doctorworm !!! (but no pressure and also sorry if i got confused and tagged the wrong person and you're not a fanfic writer, i have a really bad memory)

I just started writing some hookhausen A/B/O. I already wrote FTR A4A, now it's time for O4O :)

--

Danhausen knows as soon as they pass each other in the hall. Or half-pass, as Danhausen grabs the sleeve of Hook's hoodie and stops him. He's already starting to sweat in there, and while Danhausen's sense of smell is particularly powerful, the strength of Hook's scent is on the verge of becoming dangerous.

"Hook is unwell," he hisses. "Hook should not be here." Danhausen cannot protect Hook, he doesn't say, because they are in public, among coworkers. He doesn't want to imply those things against them, but there would be chaos if it was discovered that they are both omegas. Danhausen doesn't mind much who knows his status, but Hook's classic alpha machismo image is very important to him.

"I'm fine. I can get through my match."

Hook tries to shrug Danhausen off, but he isn't so sure. He's only in the early stages of heat, but skin-to-skin contact with an alpha right now, without suppressants, is dangerous. Chances are, the grappling and struggling for domination will speed up the process. If nothing else, he needs to mask his scent. Danhausen chews on his lip. It's risky to do this here.

"Come with Danhausen."

Hook nods and follows, doesn't give him any trouble. That may be another bad sign, being so quick to obey, or it could just be trust. It's hard to be sure, and better to err on the side of caution and mask his scent as soon as possible. They make their way to a deserted area, to storage room cleared of chairs for tonight. A subtle flick unlocks the door for Danhausen, and it locks again behind them.

Despite his protests, Hook is all too eager to get out of his hoodie, with nothing underneath between the fuzzy wet fabric and his skin. They need to be skin-to-skin. Danhausen's coat and cut up band shirt take a bit more time, enough for Hook to start getting impatient. And he thought it would be a good idea to wrestle like this. He radiates heat-- heat-heat-- when Danhausen finally opens his arms to let Hook cling to him.

[gargrizzled]

You like Borderlands👀👀👀👀👀 I don't know what you ship but any will doooo

Yesss I've yet to play Tales and only played a little of 3 but!! Hello, Mordecai, Axton and Timothy main here, I'm stupid for the weird Mad Max space world ~

Anyway since it's free game here's a few off the top of my head!

Max Caster x MJF

Questionable ethics of Caster's aggressive flirting aside this is... oddly lovely? I hope they don't abandon it, though it seems like they currently are which I think is why they'redoing us a dirty? It tickles my itch of one-sided pining!

Timothy Lawrence x Mad Moxxi

So fun fact this one is quite literally one of 3 whole ships I would confidently say are my OTPs? Across all my fandoms?

I don't know how. I don't know why. Maybe it's the initial one-sided pining - my kryptonite! Maybe it's that delicious girlboss/malewife vibe. Maybe it's 'oh wow she's even cuter without the makeup' - or the 'I didn't even you fool you a little?' 'Not once' - almost like the masks and characters others see them as doesn't matter to them and they could have the opportunity to be themselves around each other if they ever allowed it - HNNNGHH

In honor of certain mutuals (you know who you are) - Hook x Danhausen

I'll be honest, I never got to see much of them? I started watching AEW again at the buildup to DoN 2022, at the tail end of their fued/friendship. But I would LIKE to see more of it. I also admire the dedication and creativity that the little community surrounding this pair seem to have, and have some fics on a watch later. I can dig it with some coercion.

And for the wild card... Christian x Diamond Dallas Page (They had a program for like 5 minutes in 2002 and I'm... a lil obsessed atm)

They are HILLARIOUS to me. There's only like, 3 ever segments of them! But their dynamic was gold! Therapist tries to save his doucebag client from going off the deep end, with the power of positivity, smiling, and yoga? They could've kept this going for way longer! There is a single fic of them, and it's one I can't even read?

Well not for long, mark my words

[omegawhiskers]

Dynamite 22/11/23

 The Continental Classic begins!

It’s time for the Continental Classic! AEW have done a pretty bad job at explaining this tournament. Even during the opening, Excalibur is breaking down the rules, but I felt like a student who just walked halfway into class, and the teacher is trying to recap the lesson.

Two things I didn’t think I would see on AEW tonight. Woooo Energy and Jade Cargill. Yep, she was on Dynamite. If you looked at the barricade, she was on the advertisement for the Fight Forever Video Game. The forbidden door has been KNOCKED DOWN!

Swerve Strickland faced Jay Lethal in a pretty good opening match to kick off this tournament. Swerve is over massively with the crowd, and I wouldn’t be surprised if goes turns babyface sooner rather than later. I also love Swerves move, House Call. What a beautiful kick.

MJF and Adam Cole come to the ring. MJF has a cane, which is a nice touch as I would hate to see him skipping around after what he went through. Cole delivers some bad news. His ankle won’t be a 100% for a long while. The Man in the Devil Mask appears on screen and has a distorted voice as they laugh. Samoa Joe comes out to cash in on MJF’s deal. I didn’t know what MJF’s response was to Joe was as it was muted, but he’s reply to Joe was “Blow me.” Joe is about to drop MJF, but Cole calms Joe down and convinces Max to be a man of his word. MJF finally offers a shot for his title, tonight! I don’t know why Max would instantly jump to this, but Joe tells Max that he wants him at 100% at World’s End. Joe also tells Max that he is now his property, and no one will be touching him until the PPV. Will Joe be a victim to the Man in the Devil Mask?

Next up was Hook/Orange Cassidy/Katsuyori Shibata vs. 2.0 and Jake Hager in a match that served to get Danhausen back on TV. Cassidy and friends went over. In a post-match segment, Daddy Magic is frustrated with the result, while Anna Jay feels the focus is not on her. Angelo Parker is doing his thing with Ruby Soho, and Hager is concerned that Danhausen had his purple hat.

In an excellent segment, Christian Cage chastises Luchasaurus for taking the pin at Full Gear. Cage demands that Luchasaurus gets on his knee so he can rename him, Killswitch. There is resistance from the big man, but eventually he does what Cage asks of him. Nick Wayne gets dubbed ‘’The Prodigy’’ Nick Wayne. Wayne’s Mother comes to persuade her son to walk away from Christian’s side. Killswitch has had enough of Christian and gets between him and Wayne’s mom but gets shoved into her which knocks her down. Wayne grabs two chairs for the Conchairto, while Christian orders Killswitch to strike her while she's down. There is much hesitation from Killswtich until Adam Copeland comes down to clear the ring. Wayne ends up on the receiving end of the Conchairto. Killswitch will have a match on Collision, and I’m glad they set this up on Dynamite as I like seeing stories continuing across both shows. I’ll be good to get Luchasaurus back as a face, but I do hope they add some character growth through this storyline.

Jay White picked up the win over Rush by delivering a low blow. That 3 points for White and 3 points for Swerve thus far.  

In an Oscar-like segment, Toni Storm was awarded her AEW Women’s Championship. This was great, and I feel like Storm's character is improving every week. I felt it was a bit rocky a first, but these kinds of segments here work well. The frustrating part tough were the fans chanting ‘’What’’. If you don’t know, doing this chant is disrespectful. All you’re doing to attempting to throw off someone’s game. On Freddie Prince Jr’s podcast he mentioned he’d seen this chant ruin careers from working as a writer for WWE. So just stop.

Anna Jay, Skye Blue, and Ruby Soho worked an entertaining match. The shenanigans revolved around Parker and Soho flirting. This would cost Soho the match as Blue pinned Jay for the victory. It was entertaining to watch Daddy Match and Paige argue with each other as they were trying to keep their team mates apart. I would like this to continue if it remains entertaining like tonight.

Our final and best match was Jon Moxley vs. Mark Briscoe. I really like how Briscoe moves in the ring. His outside neckbreaker looked sick. Moxley got the win. I do hope we see Briscoe is some sort of title match in the near future.

This was a really good show. The wrestling was strong. I was a bit disappointed that we didn't get Adam Page, Julia Hart, Young Bucks or Kenny Omega, but we always have Collision, and it's not like there was any lack of stories on this episode.

[eldesperadont]

god imagine if Danhausen would be fucked up evilhausen again, in a Kishin Liger kinda way

for those who dont know, retired masked wrestling legend Jushin Thunder Liger had an evil murderous persona that would only show up in very rare situations (so rare that in his 30+ year long wrestling career Kishin would only show up on 4 occasions), the last time being cause of Suzuki Minoru, who wanted to fight that side of Jushin before the latter retired - if you are interested, Kishins whole story is explained here in this NJPW article

bonus: Kishin nearly murdering Suzuki.

[mjfass]

6 wrestlers you'd love to have an old school, stereotypical teenage sleepover with? I'm talkin painting each other's nails, gossiping about all the hot folk at school, wearing matching fuzzy pajamas, all the fun stuff! Doesn't have to be just gals either, men are allowed to have fun too ;)

That’s so cute! Okay, okay:

1- Becky Lynch: I think she is the type of person would want to get you drunk, make call pranks, play truth and dare, etc. Also, make everyone dance and sing karaoke.

2- Adam Page: Okay but he would totally want to gossip and spill the tea about many things. Also, it would be so cute seeing his cow print fuzzy pajama. And would tell the funniest stories about everyone.

3- CM Punk: When everyone is drunk and tired, his Uncle Phill side would show up and would want to give everyone advices and talk about our feelings and everything. I would love this.

4- Danhausen: I don’t even need to explain this. The perfect person for a sleepover

5- Carmella: Alright but she would ask the spicy questions during truth and dare, also would put facials mask on everyone

6- R-Truth: He would want to sign karaoke the entire night and dance with everyone. Also, him and Danhausen? Wow.

[mayhemproduces]

As The Fiend sets his lantern on the apron, Riley hangs out on the apron, cautiously watching he paces around the outside. Riley's history with the Fallen spans years, dueling with Abigail and her minions seemingly everywhere she goes, but nothing compared to her match with the Fiend back in the semifinals of the Chaos Cup. But tonight, on the road to Sardonyx, she's been tasked with trying The Fiend, again...

The Fiend pushes off of the turnbuckles as the bell tolls - and he's instantly knocked back into them by a running dropkick! Riley pins him there with a quick onslaught of kicks to the chest, brutalizing The Fiend's chest as she unloads with these strikes. Realistically, these might feel like nothing more than taps to the impenetrable Fiend, but Riley gives her all behind it. Only seven days removed from her most grueling battle yet, narrowly surviving the War Chamber, it's questionable how much she might actually have left in the tank, but she looks to have all the energy in the world now as she sprints back to her corner, picking up steam as she sprints back to Bray, nailing him with a second running dropkick! She turns back, setting up a third dropkick, but she's cut off at the halfway point, and gets turned inside out with a MASSIVE clothesline! Riley completes the circle, landing hard on her own face, as the Fiend rips the control of this match right out from under her!

The Fiend removes his jacket as he circles the ring, head tilted as he listens to the reactions of the crowd. Riley's yet to even get up, barely even stirring, before The Fiend straddles her, landing brutal forearms, pummeling his much smaller opponent. The Fiend only stands to loom over her, a predator stalking before he yanks Riley up, and stumbles her with a throat thrust. With Riley pinned on the ropes, The Fiend lands a headbutt and continues to stalk as Riley staggers around the ring they wind up on the other side before Ray grabs her neck, tossing Riley to the ropes, and chopping her back down with a BRUTAL crossbody. Riley's in a dangerous world of hurt, and seeks reprieve outside of the ring. Bray slides down, legs dangling outside the ring as he leans against the ropes. Just like Abigail's dismantling of Danhausen, the crowd has turned to an almost eerie quiet, outside of the few people intrigued by this sort of violent beatdown. Bray puts his head in his hands, looking between the crowd and his opponent, before pulling himself under the bottom rope to grab her hair again, and bounces Riley's face off the ring post. Riley hasn't been given the chance to get back up, and The Fiend squashes her on the venue floor with a jumping senton!

Bray rolls her back inside, but slides back in much more slowly, taking the time to look out at the crowd before going back on the offensive, punishing Riley with repetitive stomps on her upper body. He moves to bring her up, but Riley sneaks in a few shots, trying to fight back against The Fiend, but a pair of hard knees to the temple knocks the fight right out of her, before Bray lifts her up, and drives her into the mat with a nasty Uranage! Bray's tongue sticks out of the mask as he lifts Riley up, her limp body dangling in a front facelock, Bray's body being the only thing holding her up. Seeing Riley in this state of perril, the match already lost at this point, draws a negative reaction out of the crowd, one that The Fiend almost seems to enjoy. But his joy is short lived, before he disposes of Riley across the ring, launching her with a suplex toss. Bray throws himself hard enough that he falls on his back, even seeming to do so voluntarily, cackling as he does, before snapping back to his feet and seizing Riley's neck. He twists it in an uncomfortable angle, before snapping it to the other side, cracking Riley's neck!

Bray's hands come together as he laughs, delighted over nearly ripping Riley's head off, but his laughter is one of a twisted, disturbed creature, as The Fiend rips at the cheeks of the mask, his hair, before he dives out of the ring after Riley, staggering her with a throat thrust. Riley stumbled back, leaning against the steps for support, and The Fiend charges her - but Riley slides under, kicking The Fiend's right leg out from under him! Riley rips out his foundation, and Bray's head smacks off the steps! For the first time since the opening bell The Fiend is stunned, and Riley seizes her opening, sliding inside the ring to bounce off the ropes, barreling into the Fiend with a suicide dive - but she's caught! Bray holds her in the clutch, trying to plant Riley with Sister Abigail, but Riley swivels out, and shoves Bray into the ring post! Bray's stunned, and Riley climbs up on the apron, running across it, and takes him down with a meteora! Riley's far too used to being the smaller person in the match, and knows when dealing with someone like The Fiend - although there's few who are like The Fiend - she'll have to go high risk, and goes even higher, climbing up to the ring post, where she flips off, taking The Fiend down with a moonsault! Riley gets high risk and high reward, finally taking down The Fiend, but at what cost to her own well being?

The life of a pro wrestler is a non-stop, chaotic roller coaster that doesn't stop for anyone, but Riley may be feeling the effects of that better than anyone. Still donning the scrapes and bandages a week later, Riley spends a considerable amount of time on the floor, barely pulling herself up before The Fiend's fully recovered, and getting them back inside the ring. As expected, Bray's on his feet already, and Riley nails him with a jumping bicycle knee strike, spinning Bray around, and following up with the poison rana, dropping Bray on his dome. Delivering the move almost looks like it hurts Riley to do so, taking some time to roll out her knee before moving towards the ropes - when The Fiend sits up! Riley hasn't even had the time to follow through with her plan, but Bray's already shrugged it off, and Riley has to scramble. Going to the corner and bouncing off the middle rope, towards the other side of the corner to land on the top rope, now facing The Fiend, and she tosses him with a springboard hurricanrana! Riley kips up, turning to hit the ropes, as The Fiend sits back up! Riley's already anatitipcated it, and bounces off the ropes, nailing The Fiend square in the head with a bicycle knee strike! She redirects to the left, bouncing off those ropes, to hit a second knee strike! As The Fiend rolls to his hands and knees, Riley redirects a third time, clobbering Bray in the head of the skull with a THIRD consecutive bicycle knee strike! Riley falls back to the turnbuckles, leaning against them as The Fiend sits BACK up! She measures him up, and runs the ropes, blasting him with a penalty kick! But The Fiend doesn't go down, and Riley hits another penalty kick, and another, lighting Bray's chest up with these fast strikes, before nailing him with a buzzsaw to the temple! The kick puts him down… but not for long! The Fiend sits right back up, and laughs in Riley's face! She turns red, practically steaming from the ears as frustration takes over, and she lays into The Fiend, trying to cave in his chest with every single kick, but The Fiend stays up, twisting as his body's sound with each kick, and Riley lets out an energized scream before hitting a second buzzsaw, nailing one to each side of the head! Riley grabs his wrist off the mat, puts her foot on his upper torso, and relentlessly stomps on his chest! Riley smells blood in the water, as she gives up on the stomps to run the ropes - but even after ALL of that, The Fiend is UP!

Before Riley can react, she's grabbed by the throat, and The Fiend tosses her into the corner. Riley's able to land on the middle rope, looking to take advantage, but The Fiend gets the HURT glove in her mouth! The Mandible Claw is locked in with Riley on the top rope! Like this, Bray won't get the submission victory, but the hold is sure to do some damage for however long it's locked in for. It already has Riley teetering to the side, almost falling off the turnbuckle - when instead, she locks in a hanging armbar over the top rope! Bray's forced to release the Claw, and now finds himself in a sticky situation!

Unless she wants to lose by DQ, Riley has to let go, doing so at the referee's count of four. The Fiend stumbled back inside the ring, holding his arm, while Riley swiveled onto her feet, holding onto the top rope. She jumps up, springboarding into The Fiend - but she's caught in the air! The Fiend dumps her on her head with Sister Abigail!

That alone is enough to spell lights out, but, just like their first match, this match is about much more than the outcome. Riley's due a second date with Sardonyx, Fatales title on the line, on the biggest show in MPW history. Riley lost at the first PPV, being handed another loss would crush her. Going 0-1 against The Fallen two weeks away from that - and taking a considerable amount of damage in doing so - could be the punch to the ego that causes her to lose it all. The Fiend may be an abominable monster, but he has to know that, and wants to toy with her. Crawling on his palms, almost floating across the mat to lean over her, roughly grasping her chin as his soulless eyes bore into hers, glaring into her very soul. The powers of this creature are still questionable, expanding as they grow, but having the darkness touch your very essence… we've seen it time and time again as it changes people. Most don't leave an encounter with The Fiend the same way they came in, but Riley may be the exception, as she spits right in the eyes of The Fiend! He stumbled back, not expecting the spit, and Riley gets the chance to put some distance between them! She charges, but gets caught again, as the Fiend spins her around like a Black Hole Slam, but drives her to the mat with the Mandible Claw locked in! Riley writhes, struggling against the large hand quickly choking her out, Riley fading fast… seconds pass as the fight leaves her body, and Riley's completely out cold!

"Here is your winner, The Fiend Bray Wyatt!"

The lights go out, and when they come back on, there's a spotlight on the top of the ramp, the Fiend cackling over his shoulder as Sardonyx is now where he once was. She lifts Riley up as The Fiend disappears again.... When Sardonyx is blasted by a Killshot! BLADE kicks Sardonyx straight in the face, knocking her out of the ring!

BLADE heads out after her, steel chair in hand and cracks it against Sardonyx's back, dropping her to her knees, where BLADE lands the chair on the back a second time! BLADE tosses the chair aside, looking to hurt Sardonyx herself, when she notices Riley, somehow, flying after her, looking for a tornado DDT, and BLADE catches her! She holds Riley up, getting her arms around Riley's midsection, and throws her overhead with a belly to belly suplex!

BLADE scowls as she looks around at the bodies at her feet, spotting the Fatales title and yanking it away, while also screaming for a microphone. She turns around to blast Sardonyx with the belt, knocking her out, as the microphone is passed to her.

"Heyman, you know as well as I do that I deserve to challenge for this title. Sardonyx's win was a fluke, and your pathetic little champion is a hollow shell, parading around pretending to be something she's not. So do yourself and the rest of this company a favor. Make it a triple threat, and at Darkness Falls, you'll finally have a Fatales Champion you all can be proud of you, because unlike these losers, I am a natural born athlete. I was born to be a champion, and I'll prove to the whole world why I'm the Chosen One...

So, do it, Paul, or else..."