#the comedian x original female character

[hunterssm00n]

Natural Born Sinner / part 3 /

The Comedian has addictions too, and they include more than just cigars and violence. | Eddie Blake/OC |

part 3 of 3

also on ao3: here

*cw include dubcon smut, obsessive behavior, unhealthy relationships, degradation, stalking, emotional/psychological abuse, misogyny, name-calling, breaking and entering, past abuse, dark themes*

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hunterssm00n © All rights reserved by me. I do not allow this work to be used or adapted in any way without my permission.

What will I say? / What will I do? / Maybe it's fear / That leads your rage / Maybe you're me, and I am you

He lurched both of them forward so she was thrown up onto her knees, pushed her face first into the peach colored tile wall, and she knew it was all over. 

With one surge, she was pushed face first against the tile wall, and there was barely a beat that went by before he pushed himself inside of her. The girth and length of him stretched her and filled her so good; she let out a wild animal sound that she'd never before made in her life. 

It was all over now. 

With that first stroke, all of her resistance had evaporated. It was all him now - he took over everything like he always did. He'd never left her mind. What was the point in even trying to make him? He was right; no matter what, it always ended this way. And when it was this good, what was really so bad about it? 

Her brain was all Eddie, Eddie, EDDIE!

She moaned his name, her body rocking against the wall in time to his steady thrusts, "I hate you,"

His breathe was coming out in hot gusts against the back of her neck, and he groaned when she used her inner muscles to squeeze around him, "I know you do," He didn't even try to argue with her - he always knew the struggles she had in her mind about him. He was, in fact, irresistible, something he prided himself on. "But ya also fuckin' love me." 

In between gasps, she breathed out, "That's a load of shit!" 

Eddie chuckled deeply behind her, "That's a real sexy thing to say right now..." 

"Shut up," she moaned out, her cheek against the tile shower wall. The man behind her reached around to her front to grope at her breasts, and she whimpered at the feel of his hot, calloused hands palming her sensitive flesh. She was close already, though she didn't want to be. That would just mean he'd won, once again. "Eddie..." But God, she couldn't help it. Everything was just so good, so fucking good - it was like trying to stop a train moving at a hundred miles an hour on a dime. 

As if he could read her mind, he rumbled into her hair, "We just fit so damn good, baby; we're perfect fuckin' matchin' puzzle pieces, that's why it feels so damn good all the time, every time, that's why I can't fuckin' stay away from you and you can't fuckin' say no to me - we're two peas in a pod, hun, uh, fuckkk," He said all of this while he was fucking her, her body bouncing against the porcelain edge of the tub. 

The whole time he was babbling just brought her closer and closer to her release that she knew would be one of many this evening. Her fight was steadily receding back to the recesses of her mind as her pleasure mounted and was brought to the forefront of her brain. EddieEddieEddieEDDIE-

"Oh, no," she moaned out, unable to stop herself.

Eddie Blake chuckled into her hair, taking pride and pleasure in her defeat, "Cum for me, 'Chelle,"

She let out another animal noise that she'd never made; one of pure pleasure and defeat as her sweet release exploded; he was right. She couldn't say no to him. Only he could bring her this type of pleasure, give her this kind of high. Only. Him. 

He slowed at her back as she came down from her orgasm, kissing her hair, her neck, her shoulders. She openly shivered at the feel of his scratchy beard on her soft skin, but it was a good feeling. The thought of defying him did nothing for her anymore; it had all been zapped from her mind with that first release. Her body that had once been held rigid against him with defiance was now liquid and compliant. Her limbs contained no further fury to fight at the moment. Maybe tomorrow she would feel different, but now, she didn't care. Right now was all about her and him. 

He had not come yet; he wouldn't for a while, she knew, and he gently turned her around in his arms in the bathtub and pulled her in to kiss him on the lips. "Baby..." She openly accepted his kiss now, the fight gone from her body, satisfaction having turned her bones to liquid and satiating her for that moment. His tongue met with hers and she let out a low moan against his lips, kissing him back lazily. The wet sounds of their lips meeting gave her a tingly feeling in her lower back, and she felt the familiar arousal slowly returning to her core. She didn't want to fight anymore tonight. She wanted to be with him like a lover, to enjoy his company like he was her boyfriend. She didn't want to fight anymore; she just wanted him.

This was it. He'd broken her down once again.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and accepted his embrace, pressing her damp breasts against his equally damp chest. The hair on his chest tickled her nipples and she tried to scoot her lower body closer to his across the bottom of the tub. It was easier said than done; the bath was barely big enough for one person, let alone two people, and one of them being built like a linebacker. Bed. Move to the bed. The thought made her breath quicken and her throat suddenly parched with thirst for him, and she started to rise up out of the bathtub, her hands not letting go of him. He must have misunderstood because he held fast to her waist as she tried to stand up off of her sore knees that she knew would have bruises all over them. "Where you goin'?" came his rasping voice, sounding ferocious, his brown eyes alight with a dangerous fire.

She gulped, her breaths coming heavy with her own arousal, chest heaving, "I- There's more room in the bed," She barely got the words out before he rose up out of the water, holding her body flush against his and pulling her up with him. Apparently she didn't have to tell him twice. When they were both standing and she was flush against him and she realized once again how much he towered over her, how much bigger his body was than hers, the musky smell of him permeating all of her senses. Why did he have to be like this? Why couldn't he be disgusting, not charming, not handsome? It wasn't fair. Maybe a stronger woman could resist him, but she wasn't that woman. She wanted him and there was nothing she could do about it. 

Between her legs ached, and she rose on tiptoes to press her hips against his to try and relieve some of the pressure, hoping his cock would slide between her legs and rub against her soaking wet lips.

"Thought you wanted to go to the bed?" One of his big hands tangled into her hair, pulling her head back to expose her neck, She let out a wordless whine as he licked a hot, wet line up her neck to her earlobe, where she felt his scruffy chin scrape her skin deliciously. "That's okay, we can go there after."

After?

Then he hoisted her up into his strong arms without warning, her thighs on either side of his hips and his hard flesh pressed against her core. Moaning with need as he pressed her back against the wall, she gripped his broad, sinewy shoulders with both hands as he pressed his hard, steel rod into her glossy opening. "Ohh, fuck, doll, you're so fuckin' wet," he groaned as he began thrusting at a steady pace. The pleasure between her legs exploded almost immediately, and her head lolled back against the tile wall, desperate sounds of pleasure winding their way out of her throat. "Fuck yeah, this what you like baby? Is this what you want?" he huffed as his hips bounced against hers with a wet slapping noise. He spread her open so exquisitely, fully filling her to the brim and giving her a sensation of being stretched that was unmatched. No one else could make her feel like this. Yes she did like this, yes this is exactly what she wanted. At this angle he was grinding against her clit, and with a shriek she came again, her walls clenching down on his cock and her nails digging into his shoulder sinew. "Yes baby yes," His hips stuttered against hers, and he gave a final hard thrust as he spilled himself inside of her. "Oohhh fuckkk," He grunted and held them both there for a few minutes, both of them and trying to catch their breath.

And then he said, "Now, what was it you were sayin' about a bed?" 

Michelle looked at him for a moment before she broke out into giggles - giggles like she was a fucking schoolgirl or something. She realized she was probably drunk on his presence; that was what she would chalk it up to. "You're insufferable." She shook her head, but couldn't help the smile on her face. 

"I'll show you insufferable, baby," With that, he hoisted her up into his arms so they were no longer leaning against the wall in the bath, instead he was supporting them on his two legs with her in his arms. He leaned in to kiss her, his tongue lapping at hers as he stepped out of the bathtub with her in his arms, his large hands holding onto her thighs and ass to keep her elevated in his arms. She kissed him back with fervor, not caring about anything else at the moment. She just wanted to enjoy his presence like he was a normal man, and she was a normal woman. She knew it was hypocritical of her to be cursing his name one moment and (screaming it) kissing him the other, but right now she simply did not care. He'd made her come more than once tonight so far, and she knew he was bound to make her come plenty more times this evening. Heaven knew they had a long night ahead of them; she just wanted to relax and enjoy it without feeling guilty or angry at him, or herself. She was just too damn tired to keep up the act tonight. His presence had a way of doing that to her.

She felt a cool, hard surface under her backside, jumping a little at the unexpected contact, and when she opened her eyes she realized he had walked them into the kitchen and had placed her down on the counter top where he'd first cornered her. 

"This is where it should have happened first." 

The hair on the back of her beck rose, and she knew what was going to happen before it even did. "Eddie-" She was cut off by him leaning down and taking a ripe nipple into his mouth, lightly scraping his teeth across the hard bud. Much like before, she leaned her head back with a smack against her cabinets on the wall, a hiss of pleasure escaping through her teeth. She felt his calloused fingers trailing down her hips, over the tops of her thighs to slip between them, coaxing them further open. She anticipated the feel of those fingers on her core before it even happened - she was practically holding her breath in anticipation. At the first swipe of his fingers on her soaked cunt, dripping with their mixed fluids, it was like a zap of electricity that shot through her whole body. Despite him already just having made her come - a few times - every touch of his fingers felt brand new, like she was a virgin all over again, and he was going to he her first lover. Any other lover she'd ever had couldn't hold a candle to this man, and that was a fact. 

She nearly jolted off of the countertop and onto the floor when she felt his lips replace his fingers, and a gasp came from her throat that she couldn't control. One of his hands reached up to fondle a breast while the other held her thigh open so he could better reach his target. He wasn't kidding when he said he was insufferable. He was literally eating her out on top of her kitchen counter. The surface underneath her was going to be disgusting tomorrow morning, covered with a mixture of water, her fluids, his cum and saliva. That thought came and went quickly though, as it was hard to focus on anything other than the immense pleasure she was feeling. 

He sucked her clit into his mouth, hard, and her body jumped like she'd been zapped. She moaned loudly, the combination of his tongue and fingers and scruff of his beard making her so aroused. "Eddie..." 

He rose from his place between her legs, his hands remaining on her hips. He kissed up her body until he got to her lips, and she could taste herself on his tongue, mixed with his own semen. Their mingled fluids were steadily soaking the countertop she was sitting on; she could feel the slick mixture between her thighs and under them. He was vile, but she would have been lying if she said that wasn't attractive to her. From him, at least. She would have never let anyone else do this to her; never let anyone else do half of the things they had done to each other. 

Suddenly he pulled her up off of the counter, her backside sliding easily across the surface from the liquids pooling underneath her. She expected him to pick her up and carry her to the aforementioned bed. She was surprised again when he set her on her feet and turned her around so she was facing the counter and the cabinets, and she realized, at this moment, he wasn't quite done with her here yet. With one big hand on the middle of her back, he pushed her facedown onto the wet surface, her heavy breasts mushing into the puddle of sticky liquid. 

"Tell me you want it," came his lust shredded voice from above and behind her. 

Had she more will to withstand his power, maybe she would have held out further. He was too strong; too good. And he knew he could break her into pieces. Maybe he wouldn't have wanted a stronger woman. Maybe he thought she was perfect just the way she was. Why did that thought sound so right, so good? Especially since it couldn't have been true; Eddie Blake had hundreds of women chasing him at all times. How did he do this to her? Why did he have this effect on her? 

She gulped, but didn't say anything. The words were still caught in her throat, surprisingly enough. Even after all they had done so far, this was the part she was having trouble with. Because he was such a narcissist, he wanted her to tell him exactly how much she wanted him - as though he couldn't see her right here, naked and willing before him, dripping with water and sweat and various other juices. God damn him.

"Please, Eddie, cut the shit and just..." 

He rubbed the tip of his cock against her entrance, already hard again. She highly doubted he was ever soft. He felt so good just brushing against her slit; she thought she would die if he didn't push himself inside of her.

"Just what, baby?" 

She laid her forehead down on the cool surface she was bent over, and growled out, "Just fuck me, goddammit." 

His laughter came from the same place that his voice had, somewhere above and behind her, His big hands grabbed hold of her hips, lining himself up with her entrance. "With pleasure." And then he entered her with one big shove. Immediately he began a rough, fast pace, his hips smacking hard against her backside and making a wet slapping noise of skin on skin in quick succession. One hand stayed on her hip while the other reached up and grabbed the back of her neck to keep her chest down on the countertop. Her chest made wet squeaking noises on the damp surface as her body forcefully rocked with each hard thrust. He wasn't holding back now. 

"Is this what you like, bitch? Huh?" he ground out. This was the real Eddie Blake. Rough, not gentle or loving. A cold bastard. And god she loved it. All she could do was moan his name over and over and over. She felt herself getting closer with every earth shattering thrust. She knew her whole body would be sore tomorrow; knew there would be bruises everywhere. But she also knew it would be worth it. 

"Eddddiiiiieeee," Her voice was jumbled from the forceful pounding her backside was taking by his hips, brutal and uncaring. Justified by his own proclamation in his constant state of self-righteousness. He was owed something by the world, according to him. And this was just him simply taking what he was due. 

Her poor pussy ached, and she couldn't tell how many times she had come around his cock as he'd been pounding into her on her kitchen counter, but from the squelching noises where their bodies met and the rivulets of sticky liquid running down her legs, she knew it had been quite a few times.

"Who's fuckin' pussy is this?" 

"Y- Yours," She sounded drugged, her words slurred. 

"Who's?" The hand that had been on her hip smacked her ass cheek, hard. There would be a mark from that tomorrow, too. 

"Yours, Eddie, it's yours." She felt heat rising once again, and she moaned, her fingers gripping the edges of the countertop she was being rutted against. She was a tough woman, she thought - she shouldn't enjoy being degraded like this. 

"That's what I fuckin' thought." He said this with each hard thrust. That's. What I. Fuckin'. Thought. 

Without warning, her orgasm overtook her, as the main railing into her was practically yelling: "Say my name, baby!" 

"Eddie! Eddie!" she shrieked out, and he gave one last final shove into her with a shout as he came as well, his hot seed filling her womb once again. 

Michelle was completely exhausted. She could hear Eddie behind her sounding none too lively himself as the two of them each tried to catch their breath. After what must have been a few minutes but felt like mere seconds, she felt herself being lifted up off of the countertop. Her legs were so tired and sore she didn't know if she could stand, but somehow she did. Her knees wobbled as the man behind her took her hand and turned her around, then led her towards the bedroom - her bedroom. She was too tired to protest as he opened the door and walked the small expanse of the room until he got to her bed. Lazily, he flopped down onto her mattress, and she couldn't even muster an eyeroll at the self satisfied grin on his lips. Everything was almost a blur at the moment, she was so tired. He pulled her down onto the bed with him, got her pillows situated, got them both snuggled under the covers, and she could feel sleep pulling at her as she laid against his warm skin.

Tonight, she would pretend. But just for tonight, she told herself as she drifted off into slumber. 

"Damn, I missed you, doll." came his voice near her ear, also sleepy with satisfied lust.

She had missed him, too. 

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AN: I do not own the Watchmen franchise or any of it's characters. Michelle is my own OC. I also do not own the song 'Natural Born Sinner' by In This Moment. The above photos are from pinterest, and have links attached to the original posts.

[bethecliche]

best friends l steve harrington x f!original character

summary: it is very difficult to be in love with your best friend and feel jealous every time another boy approached. masking his feelings with arrogance and dating other girls to forget her, steve reached his limit. word count: 3.9k content: female reader (no mention of genitalia), no mention of skin color (but mention of hair color), no use of y/n, non canon

In Steve's mind, he never had a chance for romance. At least not when it came to Nicole.

He had been in the girl's hands for a long time, he would do anything and more for her, everything. This included carrying her backpack with the excuse that she was too weak for the weight or sitting in the backseat of Keith's car because he knew she hated feeling left out of the conversation going on in the front seat. He also offered her his coat every time they went out with the excuse that her health was shit and she could get sick easily, when in reality he just wanted to see her wearing his clothes (and not get sick, of course). Although his attitudes were somewhat affectionate, she didn't seem to notice the signs.

They remained in a flirtatious relationship, always close to each other, even when nothing was happening. Of course he preferred them to be together, but he didn't have the courage to open his heart to another girl only to be rejected again. This dynamic was comfortable for Steve for months, however, he had to admit that lately seeing so many interactions between the blonde and his best friend made his fists clench.

The Incredible Q (short form Incredible Quartet, as they liked to call the group) was extremely functional. Steve and Robin were the unbeatable duo and they were more than happy when they met Keith and Nicole working at Family Video. The girls became close very quickly, while with Steve, he created a love-hate friendship with the blondie. He never interpreted the other pair's friendship as something more. For Steve, Keith and Nicole were like him and his lesbian best friend: it would never happen, they just got along really well.

Despite this, everything has changed in recent weeks. Keith was planning to work as a lifeguard over the summer and invited her to join him, which she agreed to immediately. The two were also always at the counter together, exchanging secret matters. It even got to the point where customers commented that the two were very cute together and made a great couple. He would be a liar if he said he wasn't bothered by it.

Today, in particular, this was clearer. The foursome had agreed to watch a movie at Keith's house and nothing bothered Steve more than the two of them talking during the entire plot being shown on television. They always did this, they always needed to analyze action films and plot their escapes in horror films, as well as incorporating each character's personality to decide whether or not to root for them. For whatever reason, that was not the case of the day. Nic was distant and barely opened her mouth to participate in the conversation. In Steve's mind, she was angry about something and in order not to be talking to her friends, one of them had to have done something and he was shaking his foot nervously thinking about what it could have been.

Nic sat on the floor with her knees drawn up to her chest, frowning as a murder scene played on the television. It seemed to be an important scene for understanding the movie, but Steve wasn't able to watch it, as it meant taking his eyes off the girl and having to focus on something that wasn't her. Could he have done something wrong to upset her? He talked nonsense all day long, he never got tired of being the group's comedian with his unwanted and off-key comments, but she was used to it... wasn't she? Nothing ever made her so angry that she was cold and distant. It was as if she was isolating herself from him on purpose. But why would she do such a thing?

“It's almost nine o'clock, Steve.” Keith said slowly, so distracted by the movie that he didn't bother to look in his friend's direction. “Didn't you need to be with the chosen girl of the night around this time?”

Looking at his wristwatch, Steve stretched his arms and glanced at Nic, trying to see if she was interested in the side conversation and the answer was no, she wasn't. Her eyes were focused exclusively on the television, not moving an inch since the last time he looked at her. For a moment, Steve remained motionless, waiting for someone to do or say something else. Maybe ask him to stay or make a joke, but the friends remained quiet. He sighed and got up from the floor where he was, wiping the back of his pants.

“Yeah, cool. I'm leaving now.” He said. “We’re going to the drive-in, I think I have a chance to make out with her.”

This was supposed to be a joke, something to lighten the mood or at least make Nic smile while rolling her eyes, but all the girl did was continue to be distracted by A Nightmare on Elm Street 2 playing in the back of the room, a new release that Robin snuck in from the video store.

“Have manners, asshole. The girls are here.” The boy rolled his eyes and Robin continued speaking with a jocular smile. “And if Chloe has a brain, I doubt she'll come up with anything involving you. I'll be impressed if she shows up.”

“Hilarious, Robs.” He pretended to laugh. “Do you need anything before I leave?”

Steve said half-heartedly wanting to stay. Keith raised his finger asking him to be quiet for a minute, paying attention to the exact moment he could pause without disturbing the immersion of the film. After the scene cooled down, he turned to his friend.

“Why would we need anything from you?”

“I don't know, man..” Steve shrugged, a little uncomfortable with his hands in his jeans pocket without looking directly at anyone. “I can bring some water, get more beers, make more popcorn…”

“We're good, Steve. You can enjoy the night your way.” Keith turned his attention to the TV and put his arm around Nicole, who rested her head on his shoulder.

“If you want privacy, just say it. I even give you some of my condoms, if you're going to use them, of course.” As if a demon had possessed his body, Steve began the greatest nonsense he could say with mockery in his voice. What was a joke in his head came out much more offensive than he expected. “Just don't do anything in front of Rob, she could be traumatized.”

“Fuck you, man.” Robin, who was lying on Keith’s bed, threw a pillow at the tall man. “Just get out of here and don't do anything stupid today, you hear?” She took a quick look at her friends sitting on the floor, who chose to ignore Steve in favor of peace. She knew what was wrong with her friend and wanted to make sure Steve didn't make the same mistake with another girl.

“Me?” He placed his hand on his chest, pretending to be offended. “I would never do something like that!”

Once again, he waited to see if anyone —especially Nic— would say anything. Anything. A goodbye or see you later, at least, but when he saw that wasn't going to happen, Steve rolled his eyes and left the house in long strides.

“Are you okay?” Asked Rob, getting out of bed and pausing the film to support her friend. Keith tried to calmly stroke her hair, showing that he was there for her.

The two of them were the only ones in the world who knew her true feelings towards Steve. Keith, as a great friend, noticed that she was enchanted as soon as the boy started working with them. Shortly thereafter, Robin caught her admiring him on her lunch break and connected one dot to the other. She didn't need to admit her feelings out loud, they were very clear and, like fate, her friends tried to protect her from the foolish things Steve did, especially not engaging when it came to the boy's love life, something she didn't like to know at all.

“Nic, how will he know how you feel if you never tell him? It's better than staying like this.”

“Hell, K. As if it were as easy to do as it is to say, don't you think?” The tears began to accumulate more in her eyes and she finally let out her tears in her friend's arms. “This idiot has a different girl drooling over him every day of the week. What can I do? Show up with a ring declaring my crush while he's there sticking his tongue down Saturday's girl's throat? I mean, does he need to show off the way he just did? This drives me crazy.”

“The atmosphere became very tense today, very quickly. Didn't you notice there was something strange? He acted more of a jerk than he usually does.”

“It's getting harder and harder to be around him... I've been thinking about taking a break from Family Video, you know.”

The two looked in shock and started talking over each other about how she shouldn't make that mistake.

“I need to go to the bathroom, like, now, but just wait, we'll have a serious talk about how you can't quit your job because of a boy. Especially for an idiot like our friend!” Rob ruffled the blonde's hair in a friendly way before running out of the room.

Nic nodded and got up from the floor, walking to the bedroom window to get some fresh air. Keith followed, smiling awkwardly, not knowing what to do.

“Hey, Harrington is a fucking idiot who doesn't see what's an inch from his own face.” He murmured, placing his hands on her face to wipe away her tears. She didn't always get to see Keith's loving side, so she took advantage of his friend's affection in his moment of weakness, letting go of his hands to hug him tightly.

“I can't take this anymore, liking him hurts too much. I need to move on before it hurts me more and damages our friendship.” Nic said between sniffles. “I swear, if he-”

“Wow!” Steve's voice echoed in the room and the two friends quickly separated. Nic turned her back so Steve wouldn't see the tears and her red eyes. “You two are fast, huh? I think you should go to the drive-in too, if you're looking for that much privacy… You waited until Rob left the room, didn't you?”

Nic rolled her eyes and went towards the bed, to sit away from the two. How audacious that stupid boy had to ruin the moment between friends.

“Hey, you don't need to be so ashamed, so shy.” He raised his hands in a sign of redemption. “I didn't want to interrupt you.”

“You didn't interrupt a damn thing and you know it. What are you doing here, anyway?” Keith complained.

“Made the girl give up? Five minutes seems to be the new record for how long someone can last being around you.” Murmured Nic. She didn't want him to notice her comment, but she also didn't want to stop speaking her mind.

“I forgot my wallet, hothead.” He went to Keith's nightstand, putting his wallet back in his pocket and while heading back to the door, he stopped in front of Nicole. “And what's your problem today? Are you having PMS? Or did you happen to fail to catch the attention of someone on the football team today?”

“Harrington, seriously, man. You're not being funny today and it's best to keep quiet while we're still cool.” The taller one warned, taking the remote control to play back the movie and distract his best friend.

“No, Keith, I want to know what her problem is. I'm curious to know why she has to treat me like shit all day long.”

"You know what? Enjoy your date, asshole." She grabbed her bag from the corner of the bed and stood up, looking Steve straight in the eyes. "I hope today's STI is different from the ones you may already have."

Steve watched in complete confusion as the girl left, but before he could follow her and continue to insist on the obvious problem, Keith pushed him to the other side of the room. A long, deep and heavy sigh escaped the taller's lips when he had to, once again, pause the movie. His eyes twitched with irritation and his arms crossed his chest in anger.

“I just wanted to watch the fucking movie. Is that too much to ask?” As soon as he finished the sentence, Rob returned to the room asking why Nicole had left suddenly.

“What's her deal?” Steve asked, ignoring their comments.

“‘What's her deal?’ You are really that stupid.” Rob cursed, lying down on the bed again and giving Keith a look that meant it was time to talk.

A few hours after the whole mess, Nic was home wearing her pink pajamas and ankle socks as she headed downstairs for a snack to watch a rerun of The Facts of Life on NBC. Since she hadn't finished the movie with her friends, at least she could end the day feeling like she did something.

A knock on the door made her stop in her tracks. Her parents had gone out for the night, and when she noticed the time, her stomach lurched with anxiety at who might be bothering her around midnight. She hated being alone.

Since the lights were off and she could just pretend not to be home, Nicole debated whether or not she should open the door. Already with her hand on the doorknob, a familiar voice shouted from outside.

“It's me, idiot. Open the door!” Steve shouted.

“What the fuck?” Whispered the confused girl before opening the door wide open.

There was Steve Harrington with his hands in his pockets and his shoulders forward, a little uncomfortable and with a worried look. For the first time in a long time, he looked like he didn't know what to say.

“What are you doing here at this hour? My parents could be here. Do you know how pissed they would be if they saw you knocking on the door late like this?” She shouted.

“Yes, sorry, but that couldn't wait.” Steve nodded asking for permission to enter the house and Nic granted, slamming the door behind him and turning on the lights in the room.

“What couldn't wait? Is Keith okay, Robs?”

He rolled his eyes.

“Yah, nothing has happened to the two of them since the last few hours you saw them. I'm fine too, thanks for asking.” He shook his head, already regretting having said that. “Sorry. I... Nic, I heard something today and I just need to know if it's true.”

Nic frowned at the request and tried to search her mind for a possible answer.

“If it is true? What are you talking about?” The only thing that could have happened since the last time they saw each other was Steve’s date. Anger was already starting to course through her body just thinking about him with another girl and even more so talking about her. Annoyed, Nic pointed her finger in his face. “That preppy said something about me, didn't she? I'm tired of your girlfriends picking on me or Rob.”

“No, Nic, it wasn't like that at all. I didn't even show up for my date with Sophie.”

“Chloe. There are so many that you can't even remember them.” She said the last part very quietly. Steve closed his eyes in annoyance and gestured with his hands for her to stop interrupting.

“Chloe, Sophie, it doesn't matter who it was.” He said with a shrug. “The important thing is that I didn't go. I stayed and talked to Keith and Robin after you left.”

His eyes showed a raw intensity and Nic could feel something different in his posture after he finished his sentence. Steve ran his hands through his hair, a little nervous, but he didn't look away, waiting for his friend's reaction. He did not reveal in her speech what he talked about with their friends, but by his attitude of coming to her house and wanting to question her, it was a little implicit what it was about.

Nic turned away and walked towards the other side of the room, leaning against the top of the fireplace and pretending to be interested in anything other than to keep the subject.

“Okay, you didn't need to come here at midnight to tell me what we do all the time, which is talk. That's it? You can go now.”

Steve got out of his stance and went to the other side of the room, where she was, pulling her by her shoulder so that she faced him.

“Stop this shit, Nic. You know what I talked to them about. It's been months, almost a year... Every day, at work or among friends, we were together and always had this atmosphere between us. We held hands the entire trip to Indianapolis in the fall and you know the looks we exchanged to the sound of Daryl Hall & John Oates. They were singing to us.”

Nicole looked down at the floor.

In early September, on a warm fall day, the Incredible Q took their first and only car trip to another city to enjoy a festival together. The long drive to Indiana's capital brought Steve and Nicole closer, who sat together in the back seat humming Out of Touch, their favorite song, eager to hear it live. As soon as the instrumental started, they jumped at each other, happy to be living that experience. Robs was flirting with a girl she met at the entrance and Keith was fixated on the performance, both too distracted to notice the passionate looks their friends were exchanging. If it weren't for the crowd pushing the two at the end of the song, it was quite possible that they would have kissed there and that the situation today would not have existed in their lives.

“But you and Keith... lately it feels like there's something more there and I don't want to get hurt again, so I shut myself down and act like I did today, like an idiot. Forgive me, please, I will never talk to you like that again.”

“Keith is like a brother to me, it's so obvious. Why on earth would you believe anything other than that? You are always by our side, seeing our relationship which is the same as yours and Robs!” She shook her head in pure confusion. “What has been happening to you recently?”

With long strides, she began to walk away, heading towards the door to ask Steve to leave and let her sleep in peace. The conversation was already making her stressed.

Once again, Steve tugged on her shoulder, although now he didn't let go. She bent forward, so she would be looking into his eyes and showing her sincerity.

“I'm in love with you, Nicole. Extremely in love. I don’t get how you didn’t realize this before. Soon I'm going to start charging you for running around my head all day.” He smiled, hoping to lighten the mood with the playful comment. Nicole, however, didn't move her face. Afraid of losing his attention, he cleared his throat and continued sternly. “After Nancy, I felt like I was losing the girl I like to the other guy once again. But now the pain wasn't going away, I couldn't think about anything other than you. I want you.”

The first time they watched movies together as a group, the work chosen was The Thing. Everyone there had already seen it, except the blonde, who wasn't used to the horror genre. Noticing the girl's fear, Steve covered her eyes every time a scary scene appeared. As soon as she regained her vision, the first thing she saw was the smiling boy looking at her, saying everything was fine.

Since the day she realized she was in love with Steve, since that movie session in '84 at Keith's house, Nicole dreamed of hearing from him that she was also in love. However, in the context they were in, the taste was bitter.

“When you went out with that guy from the team, I freaked out. I thought... I thought you would feel jealous if you saw me with another girl too. I know I'm an idiot and I don't owe you an apology alone. I enlarged a lot of things to look like a lady killer. In my head, for some reason, you would see me as someone experienced. If I wasn't going to be with you, I thought I would eventually move on with another girl, but I can't. The truth is, I don't even want to. So tell me, what they told me… is it true? Do you like me too?”

No response was given at first. She couldn't think of what would be more appropriate to say. Her body trembled the more she stared at Steve, but she also didn't have the courage to look anywhere other than his eyes.

“For months, have we been fooling ourselves about our feelings when the truth is that we could have been together from the beginning, no problem?” She took a step closer to Steve.

She wasn't sure if her heart was pounding or if that sound she heard was coming from the boy. On her face, validation of her confession, with the worried look of what his response might be. Taking a deep breath and gathering courage, Nicole spoke out the three words she had been holding back for so long.

“I like you. Like, a lot.” Her voice was soft and Steve started to smile when he heard the sentence. He was already melting inside when he pressed his forehead to hers. “Do you believe we can work it out?”

The answer they were both looking for came in the form of a kiss. Their first kiss.

The bitter taste of the day became sweet, chocolate to be more specific. Fulfilling a great wish, her hands went to the boy's hair, who smiled at the kiss and moved away.

“It's always been your dream to mess up my hair, hasn't it?” She nodded yes, also smiling. It was a relaxed moment they needed to calm down. “I'll let you do it again, then.”

His hands were initially on her back, cradling her gently in the comfort of his arms, and then went to her face, caressing the teenager's flushed cheeks. She shivered under his touch, feeling her body heat up more and more. She didn't go back to ruffling his hair, she was too distracted by how gently he was slowly kissing her. She was very shy, as if she had never kissed before, afraid of making a "mistake", however, it flowed naturally between the two.

She was feeling so good, enveloped in his presence, in his scent, in his touches as she deepened the kiss. His fingers slid from her face back to her body, specifically her waist, pulling her closer.

“Steve. We're not doing anything wrong, are we? Aren't we going to wake up tomorrow and fight again or are you going to forget everything you said to me out of the blue?” She murmured against his lips.

“We're kissing and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, that’s the only right thing I did all day.” He replied with his eyes closed, whispering back, before returning to the kiss. It was as if he was hypnotized. “I want you to be mine, because I am completely yours.”

They could have a serious and detailed conversation the next day, pointing out all the failures of the past and the promises for the future. The feelings now, however, could no longer wait.

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched this week (#170):

2 with French-Algerian actor Ramzy Bedia:

🍿 Youssef Salem Is Successful is a broad French comedy about a failed Algerian writer, who suddenly becomes famous when his tell-all book about his family wins The Prix Goncourt for literature. I liked the score made up of electronic Berber beats, and the two strong female characters, unorthodox and feisty. 7/10.

/ Female Director

🍿 Pecan pie is a 2003 Michel Gondry short-short, made at the same time as 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind'. Jim Carrey in pajamas drives a bedmobile while singing an Elvis tune.

🍿

2 more by unique Austrian documentarian Nikolaus Geyrhalter:

🍿 Homo Sapiens (2016) is an eerie, wordless and scoreless vision of post-human abandonment. Without explanations and with a static camera, it visits deserted locations around the world years after the people had given up on them. Derelict concert halls, prison cells, bank vaults and train cabins, from Fukushima, and Chernobyl, and the many other disaster areas people have left behind, surrounding them to the elements, letting the birds and the rain and the weeds take over again. It's hypnotic and transcendental.

It's as if Edward Burtynsky and the Koyaanisqatsi guys had sex with Werner Herzog, but decided not to give the new baby any clues. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes. 9/10.

🍿 His 2005 Our daily bread was similar: Without voice over narration or subjectivity, it looks at the insides of giant agriculture factories, massive industrialized farms and high-tech conveyor belt food processing. How do the packages on the supermarket shelves get there? Who picks the tomatoes, the olives, the apples and peaches? Who inseminates the pigs, slaughters the cows, guts the salmons, collects the chickens and the salt in the ginormous mines? Endlessly fascinating. Makes you want to stop eating food.

🍿  

Steve Martin X 6:

🍿 STEVE! (Martin), the new 2-part in-depth documentary about this smart and melancholic comedian-musician. A warm and wonderful run-down through his rich life. He accomplished so much during his extraordinary career, and much of it so well. 9/10.

🍿 My third re-watch of his warm and funny An Evening You Will Forget for the Rest of Your Life again, a riff on friendship. With friend Martin Short (Excellent in his 'Stepbrother to Jesus' number!). Impeccable comic timing. ♻️

🍿 Shopgirl, a wistful love-triangle, based on his novella and script, about class and romance. A lonely woman living in a Silverlake apartment, works at the glove counter of Saks Fifth Avenue. She is being wooed by two different men, an immature slacker and a sophisticated older Martin. Jason Schwartzman is generally unbearable to watch, but here he is an insufferable loser. Eventually, it's too slight, a perverted fantasy of a rich, white, old man. However, it's always nice to find Screenwriting Symmetry 101 touches, f. ex. when Martin kisses Claire Danes for the first time, it happens exactly at 46:00, one hour before the end of the story. 5/10.

🍿"Excuse me. May I go to the bathroom first?..." Another re-watch: Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, an old-fashioned story with 60's sensibilities, which was indeed faithfully re-made of a 1964 Marlon Brando / David Niven vehicle. Mick Jagger and David Bowie were originally supposed to play the Steve Martin and Michael Caine roles. ♻️

🍿 The Absent Minded Waiter short (1977) was his first produced screenplay, directed by his friend and 'Jaws' co-writer Carl Gottlieb.

🍿 All of me, a lame "comedy" that aged poorly. Were the supernatural-themed 1980's nonsense the worst decade for movies? Just terrible. 1/10.

🍿  

2 more by Jean Vigo:

🍿 First watch: L'Atalante, the classic enigma about barge dwellers and incompatible newly-weds and an old skipper who loves cats. I'll need to watch it a second time in order to fully appreciate its beauty. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿 Jean Vigo directed only 4 movies before dying of TB at the age of 29. His Jean Taris, Swimming Champion was an innovative documentary that introduced some poetic avant-garde effects, slow-mo, underwater reverse shots, innovative freeze frames. (Photo Above).

🍿

2 Eastern European classics from 1965:

🍿 The Oscar-winning WW2 drama The Shop on Main Street, still considered one of the best Czechoslovakian films. A dim-witted, henpecked carpenter in the Fascist Slovak State is appointed "Aryan controller" of a Jewish widow's store. With Ida Kamińska as the confused old lady. Another 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿 Operation Y and Shurik's Other Adventures was the highest-grossing Soviet comedy in 1965, with 70 million tickets sold. 3 unrelated episodes of weird slapstick featuring some nerdy student named 'Shurik'. Tom & Jerry meet Richard Lester meet The Three Stooges. 2/10.

🍿

2 thrillers with lovely Paraguayan actress Lali González:

🍿 Rest in peace, a new, engaging Argentinian thriller about a debt-ridden industrialist who leaves his loving family behind in order to escape from a dangerous loan shark. Here Lali González plays a sexy young widow. The fancy Jewish wedding reminded me of a similar one in Damián Szifron's terrific film 'Wild Tales'. The ending was weak. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes. 7/10.

🍿 "Run, Victor, run!" 7 Boxes (2012), my first thriller from Paraguay. Like the Brazilian 'City of God', it describes a world of acute poverty, which made it a tense watch. It tells of a young pushcart boy at the sprawling Asunción market who has to deliver some wooden boxes with unknown content. This Lali González was a cute teenager here. 6/10.

🍿

3 Temporal Loops:

🍿 Instead of watching my favorite rom-com 'Palm Spring' for the 14th or 15th time, I tried the other acclaimed time-loop story Russian doll, my first anything with Natasha Lyonne. But there was no comparison. The tired NYC hipster atmosphere didn't hold a candle to the sunny flow of Tala and Abe's wedding, and none of the characters were as lovable as Sarah & Nyles. Not even Greta Lee! The first season was hard enough to stay awake through. 2/10.

/ Female Director

🍿 Repeat Performance (1947) is the earliest film featuring the Time Loop Trop. But it works more with the Hollywood concept of 'Destiny', the idea that "If you wish upon a star, all your dreams will become true", no matter how unlikely. However, it's based on a second rate Noir script, made by an unremarkable director, and with uninspiring actors. 3/10.

🍿 12:01 PM came out before 'Groundhog Day', and set up many of the rules for playing 'Time Bounces' from that point forward. An ordinary office Nobody gets stuck but only during the one hour of his lunch break. It was nominated for the 1991 Oscars. 4/10.

🍿

3 shorts by surrealist Kansas City artist Suzan Pitt:

🍿 Asparagus, an avant-garde feminist film, which was shown together with Lynch's Eraserhead. Strangely erotic, psychedelically-fetishist, and politically-ambiguous. A 'Planète sauvage' / R. Crumb sensual nightmare, full of (literal) shit and swallowed phallus symbols.

🍿 Joy Street (1995), a journey of a depressed woman from suicide to a colorful healing.

🍿 Pinball (2013), a drug induced, dissonant, nearly-abstract headache, played fast to the discordant Ballet Mecanique (1952 revision).

/ Female Director

🍿

My second (after 'The Bigamist') directed by film pioneer Ida Lupino, The Hitch-Hiker. It was "the first American mainstream film noir directed by a woman" and, interestingly, portrayed the two men who were taken hostages by a psychotic killer as helpless and emasculated.

/ Female Director

🍿

2 directed by Demetri Martin:

🍿 "Crest Atheist Formula..." Demetri Martin: Demetri Deconstructed, his latest stand up. The first five minutes were weak, but the rest was hilarious and funny.

🍿 Dean, his 2016 directorial debut, a low-key comedy about overcoming loss, was apparently a semi-biographical attempt to deal with the death of his father. Similar Indie vibes to 'People, Places, Things' and many other stories about young Brooklynite illustrators grappling with love, parents, and growing up. His clever drawings (here and elsewhere) are really lovely. 7/10.

🍿

2 Danish Oscar contender shorts:

🍿 This Charming Man won the 2003 Oscar for best shorts. It's a terribly outdated comedy of errors about racism and micro-aggressions and about a Dane who got mistaken for an Pakistani immigrant. 1/10.

🍿 The sentimental On my mind was nominated in 2022 for the Best Live Action Short. I actually forgot that I've seen it before. ♻️

🍿

The Mad Adventures of Rabbi Jacob, my second (and last!) flimsy, nervous comedy with Louis de Funès. When I was 10, I thought he was the funniest man alive, but in hindsight, he's just not. 1/10.

🍿

The Orchard End Murder (1981), a uneasy and unpleasant English story about two weirdos complicit in the senseless murder of an innocent girl on top of a heap of apples. 1/10.

🍿  

(My complete movie list is here)

[gothams-gotchya]

Make A List - Watchmen Fanfiction (The Comedian x Original Female Character)

"Laurie," Dan sighed, he looked uneasily through the thin droplets of rain at the mansion before them. "Explain why we are here again."

"I need to find out more about my father."

"Yeah, but why do we have to go to Josephine Anne Kilts of all people." Laurie placed her hand on Dan's arm, he glanced over at her and she gave him a comforting smile.

"They had known each other since they were kids, mom told me if I want to know about Blake that I need to go to her." Dan inhaled a deep breath, he placed his hands on the wheel of the car and thought for a moment.

"I thought you hated your dad."

"Maybe I hate him for the wrong reasons, I merely want to know more about him." Dan shrugged, but he had exited the car none the less. The mansion was desolate, beautiful white paint settled on the front and brass railing complimented a red brick set of stairs that led up to the mahogany doors. They both hurried under the cover of the balcony above the entrance, running from the hard pouring weather. Laurie hardly had hit the wood with a knuckle when it swung open to reveal the great Venus herself. 

She was a little worse for wear, but still as beautiful as she had been while serving the Watchmen. In her silk black hair there wasn't a single strand of grey, her skin unmarred by heavy wrinkles and sagging skin, her violent blue eyes still as strong as the day that Laurie had first met her. She had aged far better than her mother, than Edward Blake, than Hollis Mason. Her lips hadn't paled from their steak red and her white smile hadn't faded. Her figure was still so sleek and smooth, her legs as strong and built as they had been years ago.

"Laurie, Dan, its good to see you guys again." She was in nothing more than a pair of black underwear and a white baggy tank top that acted partially as a dress. In the other hand she held a glass of scotch, she opened the door further and gestured the two in. They entered with slight hesitation, she slammed the door behind them. The sound echoed through the open area, the dimly lit mansion that was never quite full enough. She led them into the kitchen and sat them at the stools at her miniature alcohol bar. The floors were checker board and the counter tops were grey granite, neither Dan nor Laurie could say they had ever found themselves in such an exquisite place.

"Can I get you guys anything?"

"No, we are fine." Dan immediately replied, Laurie shot him a look and then shook her head.

"Thank you, but no." Josie settled herself on a stool across from them, pouring herself some vodka instead of scotch.

"Isn't mixing drinks a bit dangerous?" Dan commented, she frowned and sipped from the glass. 

"I don't have much to live for, so it isn't dangerous to me." She gazed across the counter at them, patiently waiting for one of them to say why they were there.

"You knew my father? I was wondering if you could tell me more about him. How far you went back? Maybe his childhood?" Josie swished the orange liquid around in her glass, she bit her bottom lip and then rose her stare.

"I knew Edward Blake, I am sorry that he had to die so soon. Sucks that it wasn't me instead."

"Don't say that, everyone is happy he is dead." Dan firmly stated, she chuckled at him. Laurie was a bit shocked that Dan would say that, not because she was happy that her father died but because Josie and him didn't get along well. Hollis Mason and her use to be in a sexual relationship, one that Hollis spoke little of but enough for Dan to know that Josie wasn't the best person to be with.

"I'm not happy, he use to call me every once a week. We would have phone sex, talk about the world, or reminisce on old times." Laurie shifted in her chair, she crowned her hands.

"I want to know everything about him, my mom won't tell."

"Sadly..." Josie took a deep breath. "Your mom doesn't know a lot about him, but he sure as fuck loved the both of you so much." That caught Laurie off guard, she could see the sorrow in Josie's gaze and Dan rolled his eyes.

"He was a pervert, a murderer, he couldn't have loved anyone or anything." Josie suddenly went on the defense and pointed a finger at Dan.

"You are wrong, Nite Owl. He wanted to have a family, have a normal life, he just wasn't played the right cards. I can't say I would defend him for everything that he did that was cruel and violent, but he would die for your mom and you kid." Laurie fiddled with her fingers thoughtfully as Josie took another sip, she gestured at Dan."Why don't you take a look around, Danny boy? I want to talk to the Silk Spectre in private."

"Sure." He halfheartedly agreed and sat up to start his adventure around Josie's pointlessly huge mansion. Josie narrowed her eyes on him until he disappeared down the hall and then abruptly brought her ferocity onto Laurie.

"I loved your father, but with us it was never romantic or intimate. We fucked one another, gave each other company, someone to talk to, we understood each other and that was what made us love each other. With your mom, it was different, it tore him up knowing that she never loved him the same way."

"How do you know this?"

"We talked about it and God forbid I don't remember the day that he had first laid eyes on her."

"Eddie, don't be stupid, come on." Venus hissed at him with a slight tug at his wrist, he just couldn't take his eyes off of that woman. Then again, not many of the men in that room could, but it was different for Eddie. She smiled to herself and slapped him on the shoulder. "There is only one way to a woman's heart, Comedian, you've got to be romantic." She was a couple years older than him, but not too old, Eddie must have liked that. She was obviously stunning, you couldn't say that she wasn't. Edward grinned over his shoulder at Josie, he leaned down to her ear and whispered.

"How do you suppose I go about being romantic, Venus."

"Buy her flowers or something you big brute." She released Eddie's wrist and watched as he walked over to introduce himself. She never had thought she would see the day that Eddie would fall in love, but that was the day he did.

"Eddie had a problem controlling his temper, something he inherited as a kid. When your mother turned him down, he couldn't stop himself and perhaps he got a bit more violent then he should have. But your mother loved that shit. About a week later she had dropped the charges and instead came over to his house to fuck him, I had told them I was going out for the night. I was really just heading over to Mason's place, we use to fuck a lot." "Then you were made and that was what it was, your mother didn't talk to Eddie much after that. He was the one that had sent all of those profane comics to her every month."

"Urg..." Laurie's expression morphed into disgust. "Really?"

"Yeah," Josie laughed. "Really." She confirmed, already knowing that Laurie's mother knew who those pornographic comics were from. 

"He did love your mother and you, I remember him having pictures all over his penthouse of you guys." Laurie didn't want to believe it, but maybe her father did care.

"He was trapped in something he didn't want to be in... something... something..."

Venus sat upright on the bed, she snatched the Comedian's cigar and took a gigantic puff from it, relieving it in his face. He chuckled at her, neither of them had removed their masks yet. It was only one more day before the Keene Act and it was Blake's idea to have endless sex in costume before the day was up. She laughed with him, then plopped down into the pillow of the bed in exhaustion. The comedian sighed, he grabbed the cigar and put it out on the end table. He scooted closer to her and wrapped her in his arms and cuddled. The comedian never cuddled.

"Is this a joke, Ed?"

"No baby, Life is the joke. Is it really trouble that I want to hold my best friend in my arms one last time?" She snuggled further into his hairy grayish chest and inhaled at his scent, devoting it to memory.

"No trouble at all." She muttered back, sleepily. He stared up at the ceiling, finally grasping his mask and throwing it next to the bed with the discarded armor, almost bitterly. He glanced down at her and removed her mask to, his expression as serious as ever. She didn't protest and instead continued to relax in his grasp, body on body, skin on skin. Then she began to realize that she had spent her entire life, wishing that she could have had something like this with a man that she was married to.

"I am gonna miss this." He grumbled into her hair, she squeezed her eyes tightly to keep from crying. She was going to miss being this close to him on a daily basis. "Fifty-seven years, we had it good."

"Yeah, we did have it good."

"Through all my fucking struggles you were there, through all yours I never left you. We could have been a fucking married couple."

"Oh shut up." She elbowed him in the stomach and he growled with a burning aggravation, not just at her attack but at their life. "I know that you wished you had Sally right now." He gripped her tighter, threatening, but she knew he would never hurt her.

"Don't fucking talk about her in our bed."

"Why not? She is all over your fucking room." She giggled, and that was a fact: Silk Spectre was all over Eddie's room. It was silent after that, she wondered if he had put her on the list. They had both constructed their own lists, each carrying names of weight that they had either wronged or had met personally. They wanted to go out in forgiveness and so that list contained the names of everyone that they would ask for forgiveness from. She knew that she had put him on hers, he knew too.

"Edward Blake, I love you so much..." She began shakily, she just listened to the sound of his breathing. "I have loved you since Senior Prom when you had thrown me in the back of your pick up truck and had taken my virginity. I have loved you no matter what you have done and sometimes I dream of being married to you, I dream that you love me too, but I hardly think that will ever happen-"

"Shut up, I love you too baby, don't you ever think otherwise." She sniffled, wiped her tears on his chest hairs. 

"I have killed a lot of people, Edward, and sometimes I wonder if I would do it all again. Even if I know that I would do it ten times over, if only it meant that I would be yours forever. I have no regrets anymore, I have no regrets and it makes me sick sometimes. I love you so much that it doesn't even phase me, the things I have done..." She began to sob. "Forgive me please."

"Shhh..." He closed his eyes and buried into her closer. "You put me on your list, but you haven't done a damn wrong thing to me that I would hate you for. I would never regret having you in my life." She pulled away to look up at him, he forced a slight smile and wiped her tears away. "I really should be forgiving you for going through my porn stash." She couldn't help but snort, she leaned down and nuzzled into him again. "I'm sure you had some good use for that." "Pervert." She said softly, he caressed her shoulder.

"For as damn much as I love Sally, I couldn't think of any other person I would rather spend my life with than you." She blushed at that and pecked his chest, her eyes fluttered open and beside the bed she could vividly see a picture on the nightstand. It was a picture of Eddie and her, decked out in their costumes before the war part of the watchmen. "I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you, I wouldn't have a kid or a smoking hot baby mama if it weren't for you. You have saved my life so many damn times that I can hardly count them on my cold bony fingers." 

"You mean warm fingers." She teased, weaving her slender digits through his thick and bulky ones. "Long and tasty fingers." He cackled, showing her a grin of white teeth, unmistakably handsome as ever no matter how old. He shifted onto his side, so that your faces were inches apart and you were staring into each other's eyes. "This shit isn't romantic it's more than that Baby J, promise me you won't forget that."

"I promise." The next morning she woke up to an absent Edward Blake, a hustler magazine resting where he once was. She opened it to discover a note inside, smiling to herself.

-Went to get Coffee. Come back for one more fuck. You can keep this until then... Ed-

That magazine, as cheesy as it was, was a promise. One she would cash in to Eddie when the time was right. That was the last time that either of them would ever be together. 

"Josephine? Josephine, are you listening?" Josie snapped out of her reverie and widened her grin at the memory of Edward Blake.

"I don't have much time left on earth anymore, Laurie." She blankly said, then finished her glass of Vodka. "I'm leaving."

"Wait, where?"

"This house, I am giving it to you." Josie finally met Laurie's gaze. "Your father had bought it for us before the Vietnam War, he had wanted us to get married and have it all to ourselves. I wouldn't have any use for it now, so I am giving it to Dan and you. The paperwork is already filled out and it's on my bed."

"Where are you going?" This was unexpected, completely and utterly. Laurie imagined all the things that Dan and her could do in a mansion like this.

"Maybe I will stop by your dad's grave first, see him one last time, but other than that I think it's better you don't know." Laurie's mouth shut audibly. "I am sixty-four years old and I have nothing to show for it. Take my house, Laurie. I paid it off with the rest of my money for the next twenty or so years, hopefully that will be useful."

"Why are you doing this?" Josie reached beneath her tank top and she pulled out an old, wrinkled, folded piece of paper from her underwear. She unfolded it, on it was a list of names that Josie and Edward had written together. All of them were crossed out except for one: Laurie Jupiter.

"You are on my list, I just hope you can forgive me. I am the reason your father never went home, the reason he was never there. It's my fault." Laurie didn't say anything as she took the list from Josie, didn't say a word. Dan entered back into the kitchen, he had fully inspected the mansion.

"I will go get dressed and grab my bags." Josie blurted out as she passed Dan, Dan gave Laurie a confused look but she was too focused on the photo that was found within the folded list.

"What was that about? Are we leaving?" Laurie held the photo up. It was a picture of her father and Venus dressed in their costumes, in the background was the mansion that Laurie stood in right at that moment. 

"No. I think we are staying... For a long, long time."

Venus stood in front of Edward Blake's grave, she put down two sets of roses, his hustler magazine, and a black pistol that he had given her. She stuffed her hands into the pockets of her jacket and smiled down at the grave. "I love you, you big brute. See you soon." She then stalked away towards her Harley motorcycle... the one with the big smiley face on the engine and she drove off. 

She went home.

[raisinghellonstarbug]

Stumbled Into Laughter, Stumbled Into You - A James Acaster x Reader Story

Basic plot: The year is 2019, and life has been quite dull for you since working in a job that you hate for the past two years after graduating from university. You used to do stand up comedy at uni, but you’ve been putting off pursuing it due to lack of confidence and motivation. Your best mates decide to encourage you to try a comedy mic night for the first time ever and while there you incidentally run into an old mate of yours, comedian Rhys James. That’s when your life gets turned around as you end up diving into the world of the comedy circuit and becoming close with other famous British comedians. In the midst of it all, you end up meeting a particularly distinctive red headed fellow who might end up being the very thing that brings meaning to your life again.

*

A/N: Hello Acaster fans!

So this was an idea I have had in mind for the last few months and I finally finished the first chapter of my story!

Just so you know, the first chapter does not include James, but be patient as he will appear soon (but maybe not quite as soon as you hope). I do reckon it will be worth the wait for his appearance, or at least I hope the story is still enjoyable! It is a slow burn so if you are an inpatient person, then this story might not be for you ;)

You can read this chapter below or if you prefer, there is also the link to the chapter posted on Ao3 right here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33748507

-

Rating: M

Chapter 1 word length: 2326

Characters: James Acaster (duh), Original Female Characters(s), Original Male Character(s), Rhys James, Ed Gamble, Nish Kumar, Josh Widdicombe

Relationships: James Acaster x Reader/you, Original female character/Original Male character

Story tags: Romantic comedy, domestic fluff, slow burn, fluff and smut, British comedy, eventual relationships

Tagging: @laurabeech @rilannon @jasclearwaters @marklily @queensantiagoofthe99

Chapter 1 - Summer 2019

You were sitting at your desk at your mundane job, practically ready to blow your brains out on the usual, dull Thursday afternoon. It was really warm and stuffy inside the fifteen story office block building situated in Canary Wharf. This was a place you found yourself five days a week, doing the typical 9 to 5 hours. A usual day for a usual person.

Your job wasn’t a particularly riveting one. As an underwriter for an insurance company, some days could get especially boring. You knew how to do the job well, but it was not something you really loved. It involved all kinds of clients and claims in paperwork and it sometimes felt tedious and unfulfilling. But hey, it still paid your share of rent and bills. At least you could say you could manage in the hustle and bustle of the London lifestyle.

It was nearly hometime and you were itching to get home and relax. But before that could happen, there were those last set of insurance cover forms you had to copy to get sent to the HR department. And so you typed away on your laptop, clickety clack, clickety clack… the minutes went by like a chalk on a blackboard, scraping away at a snail’s pace.

You put your full force of concentration on the documents on the screen until it was finally done. A sense of achievement was necessary in these moments despite your lack of enthusiasm. It was in the little victories you reminded yourself. You rubbed the sweat from the July heat off your forehead.

* * *

The last 2 hours eventually passed by and it was soon the rush to get out of the door before you got held up by your colleagues. They were nice enough, but sometimes they could hold you back for half an hour chatting when you just wanted to get home, or your manager might try and get you to stay an hour overtime.

Thankfully you did get out promptly, and as you ran and dashed out of the office building saying brisk goodbyes to coworkers, you managed to make it to the tube with the train just arriving on time. But not without being moderately sweaty and hot though. Bloody stuffy platforms.

As expected it was still a busy train with plenty of 5pm finishers getting themselves situated on the half crowded carriages, but as it was only 10 past, it wasn't the worst time of day for commuting yet.

You perched yourself on one of the tube’s seats and let your shoulders drop, having held the tension in your body from sitting at a desk all day. You placed your head slightly back, balancing it on the window of the train. You looked up momentarily above you and then lifted your head back up to look at your phone and choose a song to listen to on Spotify through your wireless earphones.

The streams of sound from one of your favourite songs began to play softly in your ears and you smiled, knowing that the song gave you a little bit of wistful joy. You started mouthing the words.

Call it all for nothing, but I'd rather be nothing to you. Than be a part of something, something that I didn’t do (Best to You - Blood Orange).

The words half mean something but not necessarily anything. You began to wonder about being part of something that you’re not.

I just wish I could float away from my unexciting existence… you thought to yourself.

It sometimes occurred to you that you might have wanted something more out of life, but weren’t entirely sure what. It doesn’t make you dreadfully sad, but you know that life for you hasn’t exactly been the best it could be, and that perhaps something was missing. You wish you knew what it was.

You sighed, ignoring the feeling of sorrow wash over you momentarily and propped yourself back up in the uncomfortable seat of the train. You tried to keep yourself awake so that you wouldn’t miss your stop. The music continued through your ears.

* * *

You opened the door of the three bedroom flat that you had been residing in for the last two years with your flatmates and sighed with relief that you had finally reached home. You hurried to get your handbag off your shoulder and your shoes off, placing them on the rack next to the front door and walked through the hallway.

The minute you poked your head through to the lounge, bellowing a faint hello to whoever was around, you were suddenly greeted by one of your best friends and flatmates, Grace.

“Ahh Y/n! You’re home. Thank christ!”

She grabbed you and reached her arms around to embrace you tightly. You were perplexed by this gesture as it was so random and unusual given that Grace lived with you and saw you everyday of the week. You frowned and reluctantly placed your arms around her to return the hug.

As she then let go, she looked at you with urgency in her eyes and shrieked with excitement, “Oh Y/n guess what? It looks like I’m up for a promotion! Can you believe it?”

Now processing the reason for such an embrace, you raised your eyebrows in glee and smiled proudly, gushing back to your best mate who was obviously chuffed by the matter.

“Oh wow Grace, that's fantastic! I mean, finally. It is about bloody time!”

She smiled, “Yes I guess it is. But I mustn't get too excited. I haven’t officially got the promotion yet.”

“Ah but no. I’m not having any of that. You will get that promotion. It is a guarantee. They would be idiots to not give it to you.” Grace rolled her eyes and bit her lip. She reluctantly nodded and agreed.

The smell of food distracted you momentarily from the conversation. It was a particularly appetising smell.

Grace uttered, “Yes that smell is good isn’t it? Theo insisted on cooking us a nice meal for me as a celebration.”

You smiled knowingly, having known about how Grace and Theo had been in relationship limbo ever since you three became close friends at university. You knew they both had feelings for each other but often danced around the subject, completely oblivious to one another’s obvious attraction to the other. You reckoned they had to do something about it one day.

“Thank fuck. I wasn’t prepared to make dinner tonight. I am too tired for that.”

Grace then had her worried face on. She instantly knew, as she knew you too well, but funnily enough never picked up on Theo’s emotions despite constantly wondering about them, that something was wrong.

“Are you ok babe?” she asked with a look of pity that you scornfully resented.

You sighed, half lying, “Yes. I’m fine. Just tired is all.”

You made a beeline for the couch knowing full well that you were going to talk about it whether you liked it or not. You knew that Grace would see right through your dishonesty and insist that you told her the problem.

So you waited until Grace inevitably sat next to you and gave you that sympathy look she always gave you before coming out with the concerns that were floating around your brain.

“OK fine. I know you won’t leave me alone unless I tell you.”

“Ahh, you know me so well…”

“Yes, just as you know me. I’m just- I’m fed up. Work was slow. I don’t really feel like I’m associated with my life. I feel... disconnected, I guess.”

“Do you have any idea why?”

You shrugged and looked down at the floor and then back at Grace smiling sheepishly, “I don’t know. Maybe I’m not- not fulfilled? I just don’t thoroughly enjoy my life right now.”

Grace nodded and put a hand on your leg. You twitched your face in slight discomfort. You hated it when you were given sympathy for something that seemed so miniscule. It wasn’t like you were dying.

It was times like this when you just wanted to curl up in your bed, eat a tub of ice cream and watch your favourite comedy programmes. 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown sprang to mind.

As you sat in momentary silence for a bit, Theo came waltzing through from the kitchen with his silly apron on that had a naked man’s body printed on it, and a spatula in his hand. He smiled at you.

“I thought I heard your voice. I hope meatballs for dinner are good tonight. Not mine of course,” gesturing to the apron as he said it.

You shook your head at Theo’s poor dad joke and stood up to hug him. You realised that you must be really down in the dumps to be hugging Theo. It was his turn to be confused. He looked towards Grace wide eyed.

“She’s had a particularly tough day. But mind you babe, you’ve kinda been like this for weeks now.”

You let go of Theo and turned to Grace, frowning and feeling slightly defensive. You placed a hand on your hip.

“Been like what? I’ve just been a bit fed up, that's all.”

“Yes but it’s not just a bit fed up. You said so yourself you feel disconnected. We’ve been waiting for you to say it.”

You looked to Theo and he nodded gently in agreement.

“Ok… but, nothing is really wrong exactly. My life is fine.”

“Fine, yes. But not amazing. We know it’s getting you down. And the job is the problem.”

“But I’m good at it. And it pays the bills. What else am I supposed to do?”

Grace then looked away from your eyes then, twitching her lip and looking as though she was holding something back. She then sighed and began to admit something you had not been expecting.

“OK look. We know what you can do. Theo and I have figured it out. We can manage money wise. It will be tight, but if you quit your job we should be able to help you out for a little bit.”

Your eyes grew wider than large saucepans. You were totally bewildered and your mouth slightly agape.

“What? Quit my job? Why? What work would I get instead?”

“Well, maybe you won't quit your job yet. Maybe you’re right, that's too hasty. Perhaps what I’m trying to say is-”

Theo then chimed in, “-what Grace is trying to say is…”

You smirked to yourself. How do they not realise that they’re already a couple but without the sex? They’re practically married for christ sake.

“...we reckon that you need to pursue your passion. Perhaps stop wasting your talents in an office job that you hate.”

Grace continued, “yes exactly. We have had an idea in mind. See, we want you to go to this thing… it’s no biggie but well, we’ve already booked it for you.”

Your mind was racing. You couldn’t understand anything that they were saying to you. It was all too much for you to manage.

“Booked what for me? What the hell are you both going on about?”

They both looked at each other with reluctance, pondering the moment and whether to tell you the whole truth. They both shrugged and Grace was then pulling her phone out, this whole conversation beginning to appear as though they had been trying to practice it.

Suddenly Grace’s phone screen was wavering in your face. You moved your head closer to see a photo on the screen. It was a comedy club night poster. Incidentally, it was an open mic night event happening on Saturday night. You began to then put the puzzle pieces together. You folded your arms and frowned heavily.

“What the fuck have you two done now?”

Theo softly spoke, “We… booked you a slot to do that comedy open mic event thing, on Saturday night.”

“Wait. As in to perform? You can’t be serious-”

Grace tried to reassure you and grabbed your arm.

“Look, we know it might seem daunting, but we just wanted to see you happy again. It’s been two years since we graduated and you haven’t performed since then. We thought it might be good to encourage you to perform again. You were always funny to us. And people at uni thought so too. You have the stand up talent, Y/n.”

You could not process anymore. You shook your head in disbelief and placed your head in your hands, rubbing your eyes from sudden exhaustion. You then threw your hands up in exasperation. It was not possible. You could not do that again.

Fucking no way. I can’t be on stage again! It’s too scary. University pub nights are one thing but a comedy club?

You shook your head again and placed your hands on your hips. Grace tried to speak up again seeing the frustration painted across your face. In fact it was anger that your friends chose to do this without your say so.

“Y/n…”

“No. Nope. I’m not doing it. No.”

“But Y/n, we were also going to tell you that Theo is also thinking of doing the same thing! He wants to do his music again. What harm would it be for you to rejuvenate your comedy skills? Surely you can write a quick couple of gags. Nothing strenuous. You have your old material from university, right?”

You had to get out of the room. Nothing that they were saying to you could be fully accepted at that moment.

You then gave them no choice but to let you go with your head in a flurry. They both watched you leave the room, mumbling something along the lines of I’m not really hungry anymore, I’m going to bed. Soon after, you darted across the other end of the hallway, ill-tempered and almost seething, and slammed your bedroom door shut.

[chernobog13]

Having properly chastised Pigsy for being fooled by an illusionary mansion in the middle of nowhere, our heroes continue their trek westward.

The group consists of:

Monkey King, aka Sun Wukong (Chou Lung-cheung).  Journey to the West is ostensibly Tang Monk’s story, but Monkey King is the most popular character.  The first seven chapters of the story tell of Monkey King’s origins, how he gained his great power, and what he did to warrant punishment by Buddha and begin the opportunity to redeem himself by serving Tang Monk.  He possesses a multitude of magical powers, and uses the magical staff Ruyijingu Bang as his primary weapon.

The Cave of Silken Web is actor Chou Lung-cheung’s first outing as Monkey King.  The role was played by actor Yueh Ha in the first two films of the series, The Monkey Goes West and Princess Iron Fan (both released in 1966).  Chou would play Monkey King again in 1968′s The Land of Many Perfumes, the last of this series from Shaw Brothers.

Tang Monk, aka Tang Sanzang or Tripitaka (Ho Fan).  He is the fictionalized version of a real monk, Xunazang, who lived in the 7th century and travelled to central Asia and the Indian sub-continent to obtain Buddhist scriptures to bring back to China.  While a very learned and holy man, he is utterly defenseless against the many demons and monsters that want to devour his flesh to become immortal.  In addition, many female demons and monsters find him very attractive and want to marry him.  Then eat him.  That’s why Monkey King and the others are tasked to assist and protect him during the long, perilous journey.

Actor Ho Fan played Tang Monk in all four films in the series.  Shortly after he left acting to become a successful film director.  Several of his films were classified as Category lll (the equivalent to films rated “X” in the US, or at least a very hard “R”) in Hong Kong.

Pigsy, aka Zhu Bajie (Pang Pang).  Tang Monk’s second disciple, the second most powerful of the group, and arguably the second most popular character from Journey to the West.  Pigsy is the comedy relief.  He is lazy, gluttonous, greedy, and constantly lusting after women.  These traits tend to lead him into trouble, which his companions usually end up getting caught up in as well.  He also ends up bickering with Monkey King a lot.  Pigsy has magical powers, although not as many or as powerful as Monkey King.  Pigsy’s weapon of choice is the nine-tooth iron rake.

Comedian Pang Pang played Pigsy in all four films.  One look at him demonstrates why he was cast in the role, and why he needs minimal make-up appliances to sell his performance.

Sandy, aka Sha Wujing or Friar Sand (Tien Shun).  Sandy was a river monster who attacked Tang Monk’s party as they tried to cross his river.  Monkey King and Pigsy battled Sandy and finally subdued him, at which point he joined the party as Tang Monk’s third disciple.  Sandy is not as powerful as the other disciples, and he is not as colorful a character.  He is polite, obedient, takes good care of Tang Monk, and acts as the peacekeeper when Monkey King and Pigsy start arguing.  Sandy is also the disciple that Tang Monk depends on to help him make difficult decisions.  He is the least developed character of the group (outside of the dragon prince, Yulong, who transforms into the horse that Tang Monk rides), probably because the author enjoyed writing about Monkey King’s and Pigsy’s antics.  Sandy’s weapon is a magical wooden staff, although in most appearances it is depicted as the martial arts weapon known as a monk’s spade.

Actor/director Tien Shun starred as Sandy in all four films.  Just like in the book, Sandy doesn’t get as much screen time as Monkey King or Pigsy, but he is shown to be loyal, dependable, and fiercely protective of Tang Monk.

[mindctrlaltdel]

Random Reviews: Mulholland Drive

This movie is BASIC INSTINCT, written and directed by Salvador Dali.

***

Recently, I watched MULHOLLAND DRIVE for the first time for my friend Shawn Eastridge's podcast, MISSING FRAMES (www.thenerdparty.com/missingframes/episode-103-mulholland-drive).

As I watched this odd, funny, disturbing, interesting flick, I took the following notes. Is it, as some critics say, the BEST FILM OF THE 21ST CENTURY? Here's an inside look at my viewing experience as I mulled over MULHOLLAND DRIVE...

[PRESS PLAY]

I love how the first five minutes is basically a bad late 90's Gap commercial, all swing dancing, no point...

The Mulholland Drive sign is calling to us. The street, Mulholland Drive, is Bali Hai for perverts.

Justin Theroux gets top billing over Naomi Watts??

I gotta admit, I saw one of the movie's original posters and thought "Naomi Watts AND the lady from the first MEN IN BLACK is in this? It's the triumphant return of Linda Fiorentino." When I DIDN'T see her name in the opening credits, I was disappointed. She's NO Linda Fiorentino... for this role, she's even better. AND she's a countess (seriously, look it up). Oh, and Robert Forster shows up for 10 minutes.

Not-Linda Fiorentino has some hustle in her for someone who just survived a horrible head on collision.

I like how the street signs kind of tell us where we are and what kind of world we're in. It's like a surreal, dramatic version of that Californians SNL sketch.

You mean to tell me that the red-headed older woman didn't see not-Linda Fiorentino under her kitchen table? UnbeLIEVable.

Holy crap, the wide-eyed guy in Winky's - he plays Jimmy Barrett, the comedian in MAD MEN... and MAD MEN is an interesting connection here, because everyone talks in this measured, paced deliberate way throughout that series, kind of similar to how the characters usually speak in the David Lynch productions I've seen... When I started watching MAD MEN, I thought the actors were purposely directed to speak that way, so everything to seem more "real" as opposed to that fast-talking, old-Hollywood style that you'd expect to see from outspoken, big idea-types. I imagined that Matt Weiner wanted people to seem - at least to modern audiences - the way people actually were - particularly, the inhabitants of the intelligent and cerebral world of ad men, working behind the scenes, on the fringes of show business. But then Jimmy Barrett, an old-timey comedian ALSO spoke that way. And it just didn't seem authentic to me. Anyway, back to THIS movie...

OH and that dingy woman behind the dumpster! She's like if Captain Howdy moved out West and got all LA on us. Is that Cloris Leachman covered in mud? And the music... for some reason, there's nothing scarier than the sound of an HVAC vent on full blast. (According to this article, www.vulture.com/2014/10/mulholland-drives-evil-hobo-breaks-her-silencio.html,the actress who played Evil Hobo #1 said of her audition process: "I don’t mean to brag, but David Lynch said he was looking for the most incredible face he could find. I actually met him at a Twin Peaks party, and he was like, 'Look at that face!'")

I love the X-Files-style synth strings that play over Naomi Watts (Betty) and gram-gram (Irene) as they walk through the hotel, I mean the airport... Aw, these two old people love Betty. What a different life she's living than that countess who's not Linda Fiorentino who's squatting in that redhead's apartment that Betty's about to move into.

Even then, Naomi had a good American accent. (Although I learned she's technically British but split her time between England and Australia), those Australians are great at spitting out neutral American sounds. But once I learned that Betty is supposed to be Canadian, I was very disappointed. It's not THAT authentic. Where are her "Aboots"? And she didn't put maple syrup on anything in this whole movie.

Oh my God, are Irene and her husband, riding in this towncar, ALSO going to get held up, like not-Linda Fiorentino at the beginning of the movie? Oh okay, they're not. We just followed them for no reason other than to see that they look happier than an old couple in a Cialis commercial. I guess meeting Betty really improved their sex life or something.

Coco - of course she's a fading hollywood starlet... AHHH, Coco is played by Ann Miller - good for her. She's basically that kooky old landlady from SEINFELD, the one who worked with the Three Stooges that Kramer met when he went to LA. Look at all these connections!

"Prize-fighting kangaroo who shits all over the courtyard" - do you think Naomi Watts is going to come out and say, "as an Australian, I was actually offended by this line, but I was scared into silence by that power-hungry monster, David Lynch."

The countess - who now goes by "Rita" - does kind of look like Rita Hayworth. I like the connections to old Hollywood and to noirs and how it's all wrapped together. Rita Hayworth is also a redhead, like Betty's aunt. She's of Spanish descent as well... and the actress playing Rita in this movie is of Mexican descent... Connections, connections.

I love that this casting session is basically run by a deep state shadow organization with a weird waiter in a red blazer... This is how Disney cast WandaVision.

HAHAHAH "That is one of the finest espressos in the world sir!" - this is DEFINITELY how Disney casts their movies. And Justin Theroux is the only man with integrity in this room! Does anyone have any class in this town!? They don't even validate his parking.

This is my favorite movie about making movies since BOWFINGER. And I may not be lying. And somehow less weird than THE ARTIST.

Is everyone gonna start killing each other over Ed's famous black book? This is oddly funny.

"Something bit me bad!" This incredibly long fight scene between the blond guy and secretary... it reminds me of the Uma Thurman/Daryl Hannah trailer fight in KILL BILL VOL. 2 but with less snakes.

These closeups of lingering looks on Rita's cash-filled purse are great... She's pulling wads of cash out of that purse one at a time, like Leslie Nielsen pulling eggs out of that blond lady in AIRPLANE!

I want to know what direction David Lynch gave that braless woman who's following the blond assassin around. It's like she's doing an acting exercise... like you know, when you're told to fill the space... "walk around the room, and clear your head. And now you're walking really fast. And now you're slow. NOW, imagine what it would be like to walk with your nose as the furthest point in front of you. Lead with your nose..." And David Lynch did that and told the braless woman to lead with her chest.

Justin Theroux is basically Robert Downey Jr.'s character from BOWFINGER, except NOW, he's the protagonist.

Betty is loving Rita's amnesia a bit too much. If this were my life, Rita would be the most interesting thing to happen to me too. Hell, if I was from Ontario, getting off at LAX would rock my world.

When Justin Theroux enters his glass-walled home to find his wife with another man, well... Justin Theroux may never star in something like HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN, but I can definitely picture him in YUPPIE WITH A GOLF CLUB.

That slinky theme song playing in Justin Theroux's/Laraine's house is a song that I actually listen to in my tiki, lounge playlist - to give you a hint of my music tastes. What I listen to for fun, Billy Ray Cyrus puts on to drown out his love-making.

By the way, BILLY RAY CYRUS!!! WHAT? Is this how Miley was conceived??? I think yes.

Pink paint in a jewelry box! This is much better than the usual throwing-all-his-belongings-out-a-second-story-apartment-window-scene that happens in every other movie.

I wouldn't be THAT excited if I learned MY name was Diane Selwin. BUT the sexxxual tension with the waitress Diane at the diner is palpable!

So, not-Linda Fiorentino has amnesia. How does she know that answering machine is NOT her voice!?

Justin Theroux/Adam Kesher's wife is very aggressive with the large man who's so dedicated to finding Adam Kesher that he keeps calling Adam's name in vain like the secretary in my doctor's office.

I watched this movie in pieces, the first half late at night. The second half the next morning. In between, while sleeping, I had a dream where Betty and Rita were looking over a map and any time one of their hands brushed over another, their hands would turn gold. As if this was a stylistic choice made by the filmmaker directing my dream to show that there's some kind of deeper relationship between these two women. So I've started dreaming in Lynch.

I like how this film is so utterly connected to not only Lynch's subconscious, but the audience's as well. Lynch is TAPPED IN. I don't always love when a film goes all in with a surreal style, because sometimes that's just a cover for something lacking in the storytelling department. But I do feel there's more to it here, in MULHOLLAND DRIVE.

The hooded woman, Louise... I feel like I've run into her on the streets of New York. A Louise will ALWAYS find a way to give you a portent of doom that ruins your day. Friggin’ Louise.

This movie is so moody, you really have to be in the mood to watch it.

There's something magical and prophetic about the cowboy, like he's the seer that the old general sees on the eve of battle... Also, I love how the lead female role in Justin Theroux's movie is his sword of destiny. There's a glitz and gleam and nostalgia to Old Hollywood that naturally gives this movie, set in "modern" Hollywood," a total fantasy vibe.

Hahaha that "You're still here?" scene rehearsal between Betty and Rita is an excellent transition.

James Karen - the real estate guy from POLTERGEIST - is handling casting! "He moved the headshots but he didn't cast the bodies!!"

The casting direction: "Don't play it for real until it gets real." It's interesting how the characters, who work in the "business," seem to control their reality. Betty seems unsure of where the scene is going, then she gets into it. And it really speaks to her conversion from a bright-eyed new arrival to someone who surrenders to the darker impulses of the city.

HEAVY BREATHING.

Ugh friggin' Bob...

I love how Lynnie, the casting director, pulls the rug out from under that scene. There's always a jaded casting person who totally wrecks any good feelings about every audition. It's a thing.

David Lynch uses nostalgia and a latent love for Hollywood to draw the characters (and us) into his world and then subverts our expectations. A lot.

Why is the screen test just a lip-synching contest? ...I think it feeds into the nostalgia element for the movie at large but it seems like a waste of studio resources here. Early-aughties Hollywood spending, amirite?

Rita's reaction to finding the body is played very much like the reaction a character would have in an older film... The horror! The fear! The silent gaping terror while possessed with the inability to scream. I was watching the original KING KONG before this (which is may be a sign from the universe that I had to watch this Naomi Watts vehicle, as she starred in the remake), and specifically remember the scene where the director Carl Denham is coaching Ann Darrow/Fay Wray on how to act in a horror film - "now look up, and you see it, you see it in all its horror. And your jaw drops and you try to scream but you're so frozen in terror that you can't!" - I imagine that's what Lynch is doing to not-Linda Fiorentino off-camera as they filmed this scene.

Uh-oh, Rita is single-white femal'ing Betty now... She doesn't have a personality of her own, so she's going to take Betty's.... And now we're just getting NUDE with each other. This erotic thriller immediately turned from skintillating to Skinemax.

"I'm in love with you" - is Betty just saying that to convince herself? It feels more lusty than real. Betty's so bright-eyed and bushy tailed. Rita is gonna chew her up and spit her out!

I like the shot when they're sleeping together and, as they rest, their faces overlap thanks to the perspective of the framing. How much of the same person are they becoming? Where does one personality start and the other end?

The weird 2am theater. How'd Rita and Betty find this place? I love how this pop-up slam-poetry reading in this opera house is as terrifying to Rita and Betty as finding the dead body.

So Betty starts convulsing in her seat and then the poet disappears in a kind of old-style, cinematic I'm disappearing effect. I dig it.

Wait... is this a mysterious, magical show that just appears in LA, like Hamunaptra, the City of the Dead, that town in THE MUMMY that only shows up at sunrise on the third day or something like that? Or is this just a poorly attended Spanish-language talent show that could only afford to book this theater at 2am on a Thursday?

I love that Betty and Rita are tearing up over Rebekah Del Rio's performance (Rebekah Del Rio is a real person, by the way). Then, Rebekah faints as her voice keeps singing - is NOTHING real? Has Betty totally given into this weird world to the point that she doesn't really know what's authentic and what's fake anymore OR was Betty fake before she got to LA so it was easy for her to get acclimated.

This movie is like THE MATRIX, from the perspective of characters who only took the blue pill and didn't look back.

OOOH, Betty has the box and Rita has the key! But the box is empty except maybe its the Gom Jabbar pain-box from DUNE. Is David Lynch using MULHOLLAND DRIVE as an excuse to make good on his promise to produce a good version of DUNE.

WAIT A SECOND, the cowboy knows the dead girl? Does this even matter?

Now, wait ANOTHER second. Is Betty performing or DREAMING when she's Diane or is something else going one??

What's the BLUE KEY doing there?

"Two Detectives"??? Is she talking about Betty and Rita OR Robert Forster and the pudgy guy? OR someone else entirely - the two guy's from Winky's???

The movie became more interesting the moment the perspective shifted to "Diane" and "Camilla." When that happened, Naomi Watts really amped up her performance... reaching a level of intensity we hadn't seen since Betty's audition... it does take 2 hours to reach that point.... But then, when Betty and Rita are topless on the couch, I couldn't tell who they were supposed to be until Rita/Camilla called her "Diane."

Wait, now Rita's acting?? OH, so Rita was an actress? And Diane wasn't? Or Betty looks exactly like Diane?

The weird shifts in focus. The sad masturbating. This is the most depressing soft-core ever made!

Did Betty get killed and have amnesia too?

They take a shortcut to Eddie's house which looks EXACTLY like where Rita/Camilla was taken at the beginning of the movie by the hitmen in the towncar before that wild accident with those teenagers made her life weirder... OR less weird. You be the judge.

IS this a flashback or the future. Eddie and Camilla are having an affair?

MY MOTHER? COCO - what's real and what isn't????

The jitterbug competition.... Diane/Naomi wanted the lead so bad, Camilla got the part but in Mulholland Drive, Naomi is the star.

Then, Camilla is kissing that other blond actress who Betty watched screen test...

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is just David Lynch telling us that LA is a place for lust and jealousy and no matter what, purity gets ruined.

WHAT, the blond waitress is BETTY? And Diane hires the blond guy, who's officially labeled as a hitman.

Diane is also from Canada...

Are Diane and Betty just different versions of the same people in nearby parallel universes? I certainly HOPE so. This is too much insanity for ONE universe to handle.

The blue key will be found where the blond guy told Diane. Okay, that makes sense. But if this were to mirror real life, the key was in her hand the WHOLE time!

OH, and hobo-Cloris Leachman comes back... AND she's holding the blue box/Gom Jabbar... WHY the hell did those two old people wander out of that paper bag??? Do they represent longstanding guilt? Seems like it. Because they've just crept into Diane's apartment.

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is almost silly to the point of pretentiousness at points - at least with the last word to be uttered on screen - "silencio." That said, it does evoke the HAMLET line: "And the rest is silence," so THAT's poetic.

Sadly, Robert Forster was barely in this movie...

Oh, and Lee Grant played Louise - the old-Hollywood connections keep coming!

I can't believe this movie was intended to be a pilot?

***

Now, some final notes:

On the swapping of characters and relationships in the last 30 minutes -- my first thought was that Betty/Diane and Rita/Camilla look similar and/or they're connected by a parallel universe, and the diner is like the central hub between worlds, and hobo-Cloris Leachman is the gatekeeper between the two worlds... I buy the "dream world" explanation that some critics espouse, that's something I considered myself as I watched. But I'm not sure I believed Betty is Diane's dream version of herself. Also, I think David Lynch has a feeling about how everything fits together, yet I don't know if he's even settled on an explanation for everything. He just trusted his subconscious and he's so confident in his latent abilities, that we trust him to show us everything we need to see and take us everywhere we need to go.

I enjoy how it's a surrealist answer to SUNSET BOULEVARD. I hope in 2050, someone makes "The 405" really tying all these movies and Los Angeles roads together.

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is weird but good. Still, I don't know if, to me, it's more weird than good. It's also funny. But is it funny because it's weird or because it's actually, genuinely funny? Are these questions David Lynch actually wants me to ask or does he make it weird on impulse to cover for the fact that the film is simply just weird and based entirely on impulse? MULHOLLAND DRIVE is almost like a parody of a film noir, made by an inter-dimensional alien life-form who studied a bunch of movies from the 40's through the 90's but doesn't have a full grasp on human behavior, and DESPITE THAT, it's more of an emotional experience than a logical one. It's somewhere in between. It's self-indulgent in a way but also very giving. It's a paradox wrapped in an oxymoron wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a coffee-stained napkin covered in cigarette ash locked in a small, blue box.

***

Summing it up: I don't think there's a world where this movie would get a perfect score from me. Because ultimately, for all it's interesting and exciting moments, it's more of a passion project for David Lynch than a piece of entertainment for the audience, no matter how entertaining it may be. To me, it's a vision board more than it is a complete film. And yet, it IS a complete EXPERIENCE. And there's nothing wrong with that.

All of that said, I know David Lynch doesn't really like to give viewers a clear cut, traditional narrative. So, I had a feeling the mystery was just that, a mystery. Or even moreso, the FEELING of a mystery. It's not about where we're going, it's about the journey to the destination. And while the general atmosphere is moody and evocative and often powerful, MULHOLLAND DRIVE plays more like a 2.5 hour piece of music than a cohesive narrative. Maybe that's the best thing about it.

In the distant future, when our way of speaking has become as archaic as the words of Shakespeare are to us, it's the feeling and emotions and images of movies like MULHOLLAND DRIVE that will still have a timeless impact on the future audiences who view them.

[elanska]

Manhwa recommendation = Miss Not-So Sidekick

ever since reading bakarina, I've longed for lovable hilarious heroine in otome isekai that I can root for. And believe me when we said that it's hard as searching a needle in haystack, as the common problem in comedian = too many self-respect that holds you back and/or worse - demeaning other people for your joke material (you know, like in the family meeting - when your parents/uncle/relative exhausted their conversation material and use you as butt-of-the-joke. God, how I hate those........Ahem, where was I?

Ahem, so yeah, you know how the otome novel/game isekai genre. Girl transmigrated to isekai novel, knows the plot beforehands, and trying to change the outcome of her own pre-determined tragic fate and became OP or growing reverse-harem as result. There's million variation of this, all with varying title length and heroine powaaaa, but I have to tell you how I fell in love with Latte (the heroine in this manhwa)

First, true to the title of this manga, Latte is a sidekick character. She's not prettier than Ibelin (the supposedly female lead in the novel she transmigrated into), is NOT more talented than Ibelin who study serious subjects like arcane glyphs, have ultra beautiful voice, and looks so enchanting while dancing. Latte is just here to entertain us all with her antics while she's trying to have good seat to lean back while watching all of Ibelin x three Male Interest's cutscene and munching popcorn (I'm in the cheese flavor faction, btw).

Second, ARWIN x LATTE!!! damn, this is the reason I love this manhwa to death. Usually in otome game isekai genre, the heroine will heal the male's trauma/problem etc, resulting the male interest's falling for them instead. Not so with Arwin. You may come across people defining their relationship as slow burn, I'll add - 'and how it's interesting to see Arwin's struggle to free himself from his pre-destined male-interest-to-Ibelin route + how we see him grown up from elementary-boy-level of showing affection to the person he likes' on that

This will be long as it is my favourite section, so get ready: In original novel, Arwin is set to be one of male suitor to Ibelin. We don't know how he's supposed to be attracted to Ibelin. She's pretty, but Arwin doesn't even bat an eye on another top-most pretty character (Peridot Garnet), so we suspect that he was set up by Fate/the novel Author to like Ibelin. Ibelin is the perfect heroine - pretty, smart, kind. It's no wonder if anyone fell for her charm. Arwin, however, also (or more accurately we can say, mostly) likes people who are funny and come across Latte.

Have you experienced when you're writing a fic and write a situation and throw a character in, and he refuse to do what you intended to do and do something else because that's how he is? That's Arwin X Latte. One of my joy reading this manhwa is when Latte narrating that we'll see Ibelin x three fishes cutscene soon! and then we sees Arwin deviates into Latte route instead. Because she's more fun. and Arwin likes funny people y'see, it's his character. And amongst all male interests that usually written just to highlight the female lead's good/saintly trait, I find his insistence to go 'my way' is charming. One of particular example I love is where Arwin complaint he's bored of Latte's 'supposedly fun activities but turns out not' (boys who accompanied their gf to watch romance drama = relatable, bro) and make an early exit (boys = oh how I wish I can do that). of course not forgetting to also said that Latte should watch on her own (without him) next time (despite that Latte not inviting him to watch with her actually, he had a habit of attaching himself to her) and if she lonely, she can hug the doll he gifted her (Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww).

the interesting point is, something nearly identical happen on Ibelin X Arwin route, where he also forced to watch a boring play for Ibelin's sake. Which obviously didn't happen on this manhwa because he ditch the show early and chase after our girl, Latte, who surprised and make an internal monologue how Arwin is not supposed to do that, because even though Arwin is a selfish-entertainment seeker, he (supposedly, according to original novel) toned himself down when he's with Ibelin.

Truthfully, I'm not immediately rooting for this pair at first. Y'see, the first time Arwin trying to actively get Latte's atention (all dolled-up for banquet event at the time) is by childishly and selfishly messing her hairdo (Esula worked hard on that, you psychopath (┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻ ). However, he seems to learnt his mistakes (on the same evening, no less) and strive to do the gentler approach. And as chapters by chapters goes by, his continuously effort to woo Latte by being nice to her had win me over.

What interesting next is Ibelin's role for both of them. Latte still believed that Arwin is male interest on Ibelin's love story (and therefore very flabbergasted whenever he expressed he doesn't all interested with Ibelin anymore) while Arwin had to deal with his girlfriend(?) following all-around* and fangirling over a girl he finds boring and seemingly shoving Ibelin's all boring charm points at his face. *except to a super-boring play called 'Tainted with blood redder than roses'. Latte is not into boredom torture. **also, I think I have to make separate post regarding Ibelin-Arwin-Latte triangle relationship as this is getting rambly

Third, I love the side characters. I didn't like the crown prince (looks like narcisst) and Kenneth (hostile to our Latte, grrr) too much (well, they progressively became better after knowing Latte a bit/not too focusing with Ibelin's charm). However, I do love all side characters - Bishot, Esula, Gandalf....errr, Arobrock, even miss finger fly and Iron mentalle appearances (yes I always love phoenix-wright gag-naming). I love the gag references littered all over, particularly actress!Latte and *the genre still not change*

//By the way, am excited with new villain appearance - Peridot Garnet - whom originally had roles of Ibelin's rival and had eyes for Arwin. Considering it's Arwin we're talking about, I think Peridot will strictly doing harassing and bullying the girl (instead of flirting with the boy and inciting the girl's jealousy, breaking them apart, and so on, you know the drill). Well, Latte doesn't aware yet that she had stole Arwin's heart........but anyway, this should be fun thing to watch *munch popcorn*

[funeralbelle]

gillian jacobs, joel mchale, and any other community cast of interest + 👥

SEND ME AN FC + 👥 TO SEE A CHARACTER I’D etc etc

gillian jacobs

I rly love the idea of her in a Pagliacci role!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like her vibes during her depressive episodes in Love really radiate that suicidal clown energy and I would def play her as a small time comedian who tells herself that she’s constantly chasing near-death situations in search for material and not in search for oblivion.

also she’s been in so many raunchy movies that i feel like she could definitely play a nymphomaniac. and this is maybe an unrelated tangent but,,,  you see a lot of promiscuous female characters in the rpc, but i’ve never seen one who’s actually interested in sex..? usually the trend is female characters who feel unloved and use sex as a fill-in or gateway to a sense of intimacy. and this isn’t any shade at, like, nina’s character zelda or yam’s character nikki (especially because i use the same trope with my character genie), but when you combine all of the muses with this characterization together, i feel like we as a community accidentally enforce the idea that women don’t get titillated and just use romance as a bargaining chip for love?? 🤪 

idk maybe it’s just my experience but i always see the love-starved harlot more than any legit horny girls so lets get more of those and lets use gillian jacobs for the roles because thinking about it now i’m pretty sure that even her character on Love has that same characterization. damn

joel mchale

I’m determined!!!!!! to use him for something!!!!! 

my first priority is gwen’s rp americana; originally i thought he would be good for The Professor bt i haven’t had any rly novel ideas to bring to the table for that skeleton yet and i wanna avoid using him in the same career as his Community character. plus i think i’d want to play him in a skeleton that compliments him being like 6′5″ and jacked. hes also rly.. aryan looking… so he could make a perfect Detective if i can get over my hang-ups and play a cop in remotely good faith. but failing that i might end up applying for The Suspect w/ him.

on the flipside, I feel like he’d be rly good for a p.i. character that’s been floating around my head for a long time but whom I haven’t rly had the chance to develop bc I’ve pretty much just been in college rps for the last half a decade. woulda considered this muse for MW if i wasn’t already planning to bring in tom/sal.

that character is a Hunter S Thompson type— tragically optimistic and repeatedly outraged every time mankind disappoints him; constantly trying to believe in the best of people in an industry where he’s dealing with the most depraved individuals. tried to unionize his private investigation firm (love the futility of trying to organize behind the back of the boss of a band of snoops) and wound up getting underhandedly fired so he had to go independent. hardened more in demeanor than heart; numbs the hell of being repeatedly let down with a rock & roll lifestyle that he should’ve outgrown in his thirties. still clinging onto a Gen X obsession with authenticity that obnoxiously makes him roll his eyes at any cashier who smiles and tells him to have a great day. comes across as crass and tactless, desensitized to vulgarity and clumsy when it comes to tenderness despite perpetually yearning for it. compulsively anti-authority to the point of impairing his judgment at times; easily manipulated by anyone who portrays themselves as an underdog. probably comes from a family without a nurturing female presence; could definitely picture him with a businessman younger sibling whom he resents because they’ve “sold out” (read: they’re flourishing financially) while he’s 48 years old and has no sheets on his bed because it’s been a week and he still hasn’t taken them out of the dryer and he keeps passing out on the couch anyway so he’s not really thinking about it.

The biggest struggle in using McHale for this character is that he’s a little too fratty and it’s hard to picture him as this chainsmoking gonzo. but i try to play fcs against type and i feel like he always gets cast as characters who are wealthy/charming/two-faced/detached/nihilistic, and this is definitely as far away from that as i can get. maybe ill do a deep dive into his filmography and find something where he wasnt playing a white collar hunk or douchebag. idk…,,we’ll see. maybe ill use a completely different fc for that character and use mchale for one of the americana skeletons instead?? idk i havent gotten that far yet but i cant stop making gifs of him i’m having so much fun i want to use him so bad idk

one last option is like… ever since those reddit stories got popular, ive always wanted to play a search-and-rescue officer for a national park? and i feel like he almost has forest ranger vibes in the later seasons of community when he has the beard. i dont know where i would play this character but to be fair i have literally no clue where i would play a private investigator either so it’s. yeah

donald glover

i played him back when i used to write in rly wild and campy/comedic supernatural/genre plots!! the original conceit of that character was a law school dropout who swindled an eldritch demon out of his almighty powers, but had such low motivation in life and such a one-track mind that he never thought to use it for any kind of world domination, and instead tried to use it to win back and impress her by giving himself a promotion to manager of the bowling alley he worked at, or make her life without him seem subconsciously bleaker by doing innocuous bullshit like making her breakfast cereal have less marshmallows in it than usual. i don’t know if i would revisit him, but if i did it might be fun to have him have a jackass genie type of relationship with another character in a 1x1, or drop the supernatural aspect entirely and reimagine him as a burnout who suddenly inherited a huge amount of money, only for it to gradually be revealed that it came from some shady means, or something. i don’t know. fucking love his tag on my blog though

alison brie

I think one of the reasons I resent Annie Edison so much is because you can tell Dan Harmon was too obsessed with her to let her be the butt of any jokes or make her look bad in any way, and so even though Alison Brie is an extremely charming and funny actress, she never got to portray any really human or interesting flaws, because all of Annie’s negative traits were just the kind of corny weaknesses you list in a job interview (she’s just too driven!!! a perfectionist to a fault!!~~) and I think that by season 3 she became the thing every viewer was worried Britta would be in the pilot (boring moral compass of a carrot dangling in front of the male protagonist to motivate his character growth). And it just feels like a waste of an actress who could easily find humor in an uglier character and make them sympathetic. So I genuinely want to do something like that with her, like make her a former activist who completely sold out her morals for a gig as a commentator on a corporate news outlet or working on softening PR for some Raytheon or Lockheed Martin type of company. I also love villains with her mousy-petite-big-blue-eyed disney-faced look who are more perniciously manipulative and unsuspecting, so I’d love to do that. 

on an unrelated note: she looks sm like natalia dyer and especially after she got really skinny circa 2016, she would be a rly good timeskip cast for the older, strung-out version of my character max? 

wld definitely gif brie in Sleeping With Other People & How to Be Single & Community s5 + s6 if sage and i ever went through with that timekip plot or if i ever found a place to play a conniving daffodil.

[scarletwidowaf]

The Silver Eidolon

Natasha Romanoff x original female character

Warnings: none

Part 1/?

Note: Okay for starts, i obviously owns non of the characters except for one (raven), and i obv knows its not really accurate, since i dont know when exactly mcu natasha joined shileld etc, so thats too.

I really hope you'll like it, as you all know i am a scarletwidow shipper BUT i had this idea for a while now and I thought giving it chance wont hurt. Let me know what you think !

Part 1: The Silver Eidolon

2010

Natasha wasn't sure how she ended up in an abandoned town in the middle of a nowhere looking for god know's what that fury sent her to get. least the assassin was alone, as much as she liked her partner she needed some space and both agreed to split and go look into different sides of the abandoned town so they could clear more area.

it wasn't a long time since she changed a path, left the kgb and joined shield and somehow found herself in this mission with the guy who originally recruited her into s.h.i.e.l.d, a smartass with a bow and arrows.

The red head assassin wasn't really sure what to expect but she was ready to face almost anything, from serial killers to a science project that went wrong. At least that what she was trained to do.

"Hey stranger"

Natasha heard, the assassin was ready to attack yet didn't, instead she stared back at a girl with the grey eyes and a contagious smirk.

The girl was beautiful, her skin was pale, like she wasn't exposed to sun in a while, and her hair silverd, with matching stormy eyes. The top of her long hair was stuck under big goggles and a dark brown pilots leather jacket covered a black t-shirt.

Two riffles and a sword were fixed on her upper back and a smaller gun on her hip.

The girl's legs were tangled from the top of the roof while a playful smirk played on her lips.

Natasha eyed the girl in front of her,

Her gun already aimed, finding the girl as an easy target.

Even with a gun aimed to her head the girl still hasn't dropped the annoying smirk and Natasha was ready to pull the goddamn trigger.

"At least we know that Im not invisible. It happens sometimes" she said like its a normal thing to experience before she stood up, dusted her black pants and fixed the goggles on her head.

The assassin looked at her with raised eyebrow. That kid was weird.

"Oh, i can see you"

Natasha chose to adress the girl's statement. The stranger laughed, a pure laugh that made Natasha hide a small smile behind her well known poker face.

"In that case you're just being rude i guess" the girl stated

"you could've at least say 'hey' back" she said and dropped her smirk, a cute pout replace it.

The agent stood a few feet from the building, eyeing the stranger that seemed like a mix between a pilot, a goth and apparently, a comedian- or maybe a maniac, natasha wasn't sure.

"Who do you work for?" Natasha ignored the girl's comment.

"Who do i work for?" The girl repeated the question.

"I don't think I'm supposed to answer that" she said and smirked again,

the girl jumped from the roof and moments later stood a few matters away from natasha.

"Im raven" the weird pilot said

"What are you doing here, raven?" Natasha said, Her gun still aimed at the stranger.

"I was sent to keep an eye on you"

she sounded bored

"Why?"

Natasha was starting to get tired of the girl, she was starting to get on her nerves.

"I dont know why"

Natasha was done with this girl.

"By who?"

She repeated her original question.

"Men" the girl simply said

The assassin narrowed her eyes

"Are you going to tell me who his men are?" Natasha asked, her voice dangerously low

"So many questions and you didn't even introduce yourself" the girl complained

"If you want to know so many things about me itll better involve a glass of whine, I prefer red" she cheekily said, Natasha raised her eyebrow at the girl, a bit amused by her yet prepared to attack if needed to.

"Anyway, you- and your friend- should go now" the girl casually said

"They knows you're here and you're about to be surrounded by many soldiers and if im not wrong, and im not, no mattar how talented you are you're not prepared for it" she finished.

Natasha was about to say something to the girl but got cut off by the alarm which only confirmed what raven said.

"We need to go, now" she said into her earpiece

"Yeah, i think we've got company" clint said back, sounded breathless.

"Go on, leave. and don't miss me too much, i bet we'll meet again" the girl assured natasha with a smirk and Natasha glared.

"Wouldn't count on it"

----------------------------------------------------

2025

Waking up with a big headache didn't feel like a new experience for raven,

When she woke up in the hospital bed connected to different tubes she was mostly confused.

How she got there and who the hell put her there.

The last thing she remembered was a shock and the cold, maybe ice? But that was it.

She had a feeling it wasn't the first time she was in this situation yet she had no idea how she got there and why.

If she was being totally honest she didn't remember much.

"You're up" she heard and looked up to meet warm brown eyes.

The man sat next to her, half of his long hair was pulled back into a small bun while the other part rested on this shoulders.

He was a handsome looking man and he seemed rather concerned with the grey haired girl.

Raven felt like she's supposed to know who this guy is, yet no mattar how hard she tried she couldn't.

"Where am i?"

She asked, her voice was sore.

The man smiled sadly at her

"A safe place"

He reassured her, he seemed sincere.

"What was the last thing you remember?"

He asked and she looked away from him

"Not much" she admitted

He nodded, he didn't push the subject any further and raven was grateful for that.

"Do you remember your name?"

"Im raven, i think"

She said and he smiled

"Hey raven, im bucky"

------------------------------------------------

[hunterssm00n]

Natural Born Sinner

The Comedian has addictions too, and they include more than just cigars and violence. | Eddie Blake/OC |

part 1 of 3

also on ao3: here

*cw include dubcon smut, obsessive behavior, unhealthy relationships, degradation, stalking, emotional/psychological abuse, misogyny, name-calling, breaking and entering, past abuse, dark themes*

౨ৎ

hunterssm00n © All rights reserved by me. I do not allow this work to be used or adapted in any way without my permission.

He lifted up Himself and said unto them "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her."

The day had crawled by, and the commute home had crawled even more. All she wanted after a long work week was to be holed up in her apartment with a book, something hot to drink and a warm bubble bath. Maybe that's what she would do tonight - she thought of this as she exited the bus at the stop on the corner. She waved at the driver as she walked down the stairs through the open doors, and he'd crooned at her to have a nice weekend, Michelle.

It was still raining, like it had been the whole day - lately, that seemed to be the only thing Mother Nature wanted to do. Maybe she was sad, Michelle pondered as she crossed the first of three blocks that would lead to her apartment. She didn't have her umbrella with her - it sat idly next to her swivel chair in her cubicle at work, probably still damp from this morning. That was okay though, she didn't mind the rain. And it wasn't like she'd be seeing anyone else tonight anyways. This rain would no doubt frizz her hair in some ungodly way. If it wasn't so damn cold outside - mid October in the city was not at all it was cracked up to be - she probably would have even considered jumping in the puddles. But she didn't. She probably would've ruined her heels, which would've been a big upset.

As she neared her apartment complex entrance, she reached into her pocket to fish around for her front door key. Tiptoeing up the steps to the door in her black high heels, she noted that the lock had been broken. Hmm, no use for the key then. Swinging her long black hair over one shoulder, she simply pushed the door open and stepped inside, attempting to close it behind her to the best of her ability. This was not uncommon - happened all the time. She thought nothing of it as she unzipped her coat, shaking it off during her trek up the stairs to her tiny apartment. Rounding the corner to the right, she did, however, think it was odd that her door was open.

This meant one of two things. Someone was robbing her place, or he was there.

"Shit," she stated. Her unladylike mouth tended to get her in trouble more often than not, but she knew that if he was actually in her apartment then he would be very amused by it. Slowly, she crossed the short span of floor to her front door. She noted that the lock was not broken, the door was merely propped open. Even slower, she reached out and pushed the door open, waiting to see what awaited her inside of her apartment.

Nothing.

Nothing out of the ordinary. Her apartment was the same as it always was; a little messy, smelled a bit like the candle she'd accidentally left burning all last night. No lights on, so she couldn't be sure someone wasn't hiding in the shadows. However, she was sure that he wasn't there, because if he was, he wouldn't be hiding from her. He'd probably be sitting right in her favorite chair in front of the TV, smoking a cigar, one ankle propped up on his knee as he waited for her to come home.

In fact, the only difference she noted was the faint trace of that cigar smoke in the air. The further she walked in, turning on lights as she went, the more she could smell it. She glanced back at the door warily, eyes roving for anything that could have been out of the ordinary. Had he been here? She didn't smoke, so it wasn't a normal smell that was prevalent in her space... Unless he showed up, of course. Then the smell overtook everything. However, no one was there, she concluded. She'd gone through every room, turned on every light, and there was no other trace of anyone having been there. If he had been here, he was gone now. 

Michelle allowed herself to relax for the first time since she got home, sure that she was alone in here. She went over to her front door and made sure it was locked - maybe she'd not locked it properly when she left for work in the morning. Doubt clouded her mind at that thought - she always made sure the door was locked completely when she left her place. Don't worry, there's no one here. She let that thought settle in her mind, trying to let it comfort her. Maybe she was just imagining the smell in the air as well; maybe the thought of him was playing tricks on her like a ghost.

After unloading herself - taking her coat off and hanging her purse up on the coat rack, toeing her shoes off - she immediately went into the bathroom to start drawing herself a bath. That was her goal for this evening: absolute relaxation.

Once the water had run warm and filled up the tub, she added a lavender smelling liquid soap to it and stripped off her clothes, eager to jump into the nice smelling concoction. She pinned up her long hair, thinking how sad it was that she was excited to sit here and soak for the remainder of the evening. But, she needed to majorly de-stress, and this was the best way to do it.

She stepped into the soapy water, sinking down into it with a sigh. Leaning her head back against the porcelain edge of the tub, she closed her eyes for the first time all day.

Not even a minute had passed when she heard a noise from outside her front door. Footsteps, heavy ones. She opened one eye, listening hard. It was probably someone passing by to get to another apartment. From her bathroom she had a direct view to the entrance to her apartment. Since she lived alone, she never bothered closing the bathroom door. She noted a shadow underneath the door from the hallway that wasn't moving - somebody was definitely outside her door, hovering there.

Michelle had seen enough movies to know that she was no way in hell going to call out. That was a sure-fire way to get murdered. She waited in the tub to see if they would leave. The shadow shifted once, followed by a metal clanking noise. It took her a moment to realize that whomever it was was attempting to pick the lock. Now the panic started to set in. Did they know someone was in here? Did they care?

She thought of the smell of the cigar smoke from earlier. Was he outside the door right now, picking the lock? She rose up from out of the water, the soapy suds dribbling down her naked body. She reached for the towel hanging on the rack bolted to the wall next to the tub, wrapping it around herself while stepping out of the water. The clanking from the front door continued, and she quickly cut through the door that led to the bathroom, heading for the kitchen. Her thought was on the giant breadknife that lay dormant in her kitchen cabinet - if she could get to that at least she'd have something.

Halfway there, her door swung open, and instead of freezing in her tracks she took off in a run towards the dark kitchen to her left. She heard the door slam and footsteps thunder towards her just as she slipped into the kitchen. Quick as lightning, she yanked the drawer open and grabbed the massive breadknife, whipping around to point it towards her assailant just as they were about to grab her.

Much to her (non) surprise, he stood behind her. The Comedian himself, Edward Blake. He gave a huff of amusement at the sight of her holding the knife, pointed right at him. "Baby, if I knew this was gonna be the welcoming committee, I woulda come a helluva lot sooner," He winked at her with one of his grins that could put city lights to shame. His problem was that he was handsome, and he knew it. Many a woman had fallen for that smile, those eyes that could stare right through you; he was the very definition of tall, dark and handsome. The devil in disguise. Many a woman, including her.

The difference here was that while she'd fallen for that charm, she wasn't stupid enough to believe him and put up with his shit. She knew the kind of man he was, which was why she tried to avoid him at all costs.

It was a lot harder to avoid him, though, when he did things like this - this wasn't the first time he'd broken into her apartment, unannounced. It just had been a while; a few months. The last time she'd seen him was about three weeks ago (not that long), and it hadn't been in her apartment. Then, he'd visited her at work... after hours, and hadn't let her leave until he'd gotten what he'd wanted.

Still standing with a tense posture, she did lower the knife, but didn't put it down on the counter, "Eddie, you're not supposed to be here."

"Says who?" He eyed her up and down, noting how she was still dripping wet from leaping out of her warm bath at the speed of light. There was a puddle pooling on the cracked kitchen floor by her feet - the rapidly cooling water was now touching her toes as the slope of the floor caused the liquid to roll towards her bare feet.

She could not deny, though she knew how wrong this was, that she felt a twinge of excitement upon seeing him. And she knew how wrong it was, completely and wholly. She always wished Eddie was a better man - if he had been, she could honestly say she would have had no problem with this. Hell, she probably would've gotten down on one knee and proposed to him.

"Says me," Now she did put the knife down on the counter behind her, crossing her arms at him, "I told you not to come here."

"Yeah," he sighed, taking his heavy swaggering steps towards her, one hand reaching up to stroke the scruff on his chin, "But we both know you didn't mean it."

She made herself stand her ground as he came near - it took all of her strength to keep her feet planted on the ground. "I did mean it, and I mean it right now when I say: Get out." He stopped uncomfortably close to her - she could feel the heat radiating off of his large body, smell the musk coming from him as he towered over her. There was tension in the air as he looked down at her, pondering her statement with a smirk. His eyes were dark and smoldering beneath the mask covering them; the mask did nothing to diminish their devious intensity. "You can't push me around."

He chuckled, like this was funny. "Sure I can," He grabbed onto her damp, bare shoulders and pushed her back against the counter. Her lower back hit it firmly enough to startle her. If this was any other situation with him - if he was actually a good man, she could have stood to play this game with him. But she couldn't do this because it was him. He had to go now.

"Eddie," There was an edge to her voice, but it didn't come out as harsh as she wanted it to, "Don't," She pushed her hands against his chest, which was protected by the hard bullet proof vest that he wore with the rest of his costume. Her push, which was rather flimsy, she noted with annoyance, did nothing to him. She chalked it up to her being nervous - she knew what was going to happen, and she knew there was a point where she was going to stop protesting.

"Honey, I'm not gonna hurt'cha," He nuzzled his face into her hair, cradling her now so that her head was under his chin, her lips inches from his throat. She wanted to bite the skin of his neck, wanted to kiss it, lick it, tear into it with her teeth. She wouldn't let herself unwind from this rigid posture - she feared that if she did, the motions would all come back full force, and she would lost herself to this lust that he brought out of her.

"I just missed ya is all," Big, warm hands cradled her jaw, trying to lift her face so she would look at him, "C'mon baby girl,"

God, that voice was her undoing. Deep, hot drawl that poured out of him like molasses. She could feel the vibration of his chest against her hands, rumbling with each word he spoke. Oh, hell. She tried to keep her face away from his, but those calloused palms could be so strong yet so gentle at the same time. He managed to lift her face, tilting her head back with skill. She turned her cheek as he leaned in for a kiss, his scruffy beard grazing her cheek as did his lips. Undeterred, his mouth continued to kiss down to the crook of her neck, and she felt his tongue lap at droplets of water that still clung to her bare skin.

She balled her hands into fists against the hard covering on his chest, resisting the urge to wrap her arms around his waist. He kissed a warm trail down to her shoulder, having to lean down the farther he went. As if he'd been thinking that at the same time as she, he suddenly gripped his hands onto her towel clothed waist and hoisted her up to sit on the countertop behind her. This swift motion caused the top of her towel to unravel from her chest, leaving her exposed to the chilly air. Her nipples hardened in the coolness, and his administrations were not helping as he stood between her legs and trapped her there, hands stroking her thighs and mouth working all over her neck and shoulders. She did let out a moan, a quiet one that escaped her throat, when he knelt down so his mouth could reach her exposed breasts. The heat between her legs was molten with desire, burning hot with want that she knew wasn't going to go away. She banged her head back against the cabinet on the wall behind her when he tugged on a nipple with his teeth. She didn't even realize her hands were in his hair until he hissed at a particularly hard pull, and she tilted her head to look down at him.

"Not that I don't enjoy the fight you put up, but," Those large hands fumbled with untying the rest of the towel and getting it off of her, "I don't know why y'even bother when you know you're just gonna wind up on your back begging me Eddie, Eddie please-"

With a glare and a surge of energy, she shoved at his chest with her feet, pushing him back away from her. He landed on his back with a massive thud that shook her entire kitchen, pots and pans rattling in their cabinets and under the stove. Jumping down from the counter top, she clutched at the towel in her hands, bringing it up to cover her chest once more. She reached back and snatched the knife up off the counter, pointing it at him as he started to sit back up with a growl.

"No," she stated firmly, swallowing down as much of the arousal as she could. Eddie sat up a little off the floor, leaning on his elbows as he watched her brandish the knife at him. "You need to go. Don't make me say it a third time."

"Awww, 'Chelle," He smiled at her like he thought she was cute, that megawatt grin lighting up the dark kitchen, "Put that damn thing away, honey, only person you're gonna hurt is yourself."

She took a step closer, jaw clenched (as well as her thighs), "You know damn well I know how to use this - I'm not fucking around, Eddie, I want you to-"He lunged up at her suddenly, and she let out a shriek as she jumped back, still holding the knife steadily out in front of her as he leapt to his feet. "Jesus Christ!" One hand clutching her towel closed over her chest, her hand that held the knife trembled ever so slightly as she kept it pointed at him, "Just stop it already, would you please?!" She knew he was trying to scare her, and damn it, it worked. He had that look in his eyes he got when he was about to do something bad - that sick light in his dark iris's that meant he was more than willing to take her even with the knife still clutched between her fingers.

Instead of acting upon whatever he'd been thinking about doing, he relaxed his posture and reached a hand up to smooth his hair out of his face. He sighed, "Believe it or not sweetheart, I'm not here for a fight. I miss you - I wanted to see you." The words sounded foreign, awkward coming from him. The Comedian rarely got sentimental, rarely got serious unless he was pissed off. She almost felt uncomfortable hearing him say them, as much as he himself was saying them.

She swallowed thickly again at his low voice as it crawled over her flesh like a warm breath of air. She didn't let herself loosen her grip on the knife. "You broke into my apartment - into my building."

"Okay," He held up one large hand, palm facing out towards her, "That was broke when I got here - your fuckin' landlord is a piece of shit, wouldn't know how to fortify a building to save his damn life. Then I had to rush on up here and make sure you were okay, but you weren't home. So, yeah, then I picked your lock." He shrugged, like it wasn't a big deal. "And I wouldn't have to break in if you didn't keep changing the damn locks."

She stared at him in outrage, "I never gave you a key!"

"You left a spare lying out on the fucking coffee table - what else were ya gonna do with it?"

"I wasn't gonna give it to you! Not everything is yours!"

"'Course it ain't," There was that grin again. God, he was going to be the death of her. "That's why when you want something, y'gotta take it."

Instead of arguing with him further, she shook her head, "You're fucking insufferable."

"And you love me for it," He winked at her, taking a step closer, not caring about the potential danger of the knife she held. She raised it at him in warning - she would not be swayed by his charm. Looking down at the blade like how one would look at a flower, the man before her tilted his head to one side before his eyes once again rose to meet hers. Then, "Were you takin' a bath before I came in?" The tone of his inquiry was general curiosity laced with suggestiveness - which meant that she should not answer this question. She didn't give him any indication that she'd heard him, but that didn't seem to deter him from his goal... Whatever it was at the moment. "Well hell, doll, don't let me stop ya! You know what, I've got a great idea: Why don't I join you? I'm feelin' real dirty right now..."

She narrowed her eyes at him, but he was already turning and heading towards her bathroom - her very tiny bathroom that could barely fit one person, let alone the both of them. He himself was the size of two and a half people - tall and broad, and his costume just added to his bulk. Still clutching the knife, she followed him, stepping carefully over the trail of costume he was leaving behind. She had half a mind to pick up all the pieces and throw it all out the window, but she didn't want to give him a reason to be walking around naked in her apartment. At least if everything was here, she could maybe chuck it all out in the hallway and shove him out with it. Maybe. Her heart stopped when she saw his pants lying in the doorway to the bathroom, and she gulped despite herself. "Eddie..." she warned, knowing the sight that would await her when she rounded the corner - she steeled herself for what she would see.

The sight before her she was sure would be the death of her, if nothing else he did quite did the trick. The Comedian was laying in her bathtub, which was not big enough for him, and he was naked. He scrubbed at the black paint around his eyes with the soapy water - he didn't seem to mind the girly scent. Everything was off - his clothes, his gloves, his mask. There were no weapons in sight, so unless they were submerged under the water with the rest of him, they were lying dormant on the floor with the rest of his costume. He cupped his large hands in the water to gather some, and poured it over his head, smoothing back his damp hair. God Almighty. He had to leave now before he caused her to do something she would regret.

"C'mon, 'Chelle, I need help gettin' my back. You know there's that one spot I can't ever reach,"

"No, what you need to do is go, just please, go."

"Please, please, please, so Goddamn polite," He plucked her purple loofah off of the hook it had been hanging on suctioned to the side of the shower. "You're even polite when my tongue is in your pussy." He chuckled at the thought, squeezing her loofah between his hands so the soap suds spilled over his fingers, "'Oh Eddie, please, oh unnh please...'"

She tried her best to ignore what his words did to her. She didn't know what to do - he wasn't going to leave and her resistance was fading. Her conscience was even whispering Just give him what he wants, what you want, and he'll go. But every time she did, it was harder to let him go.

She knew she wasn't the only one this whole situation was hard on.

Her lack of words caused him to look over in her direction, dark eyes trailing up her towel clothed body before meeting her own. He seemed to sense her conflict (which wasn't difficult given their past), and he stood up out of the water.

She'd been right about the whole 'no clothes' part. That was for certain.

Her mouth watered at the sight of him, much like the water that cascaded down his naked body as he stood there. She didn't stop her eyes from roaming; she couldn't. He extended a hand out to her, one long leg lifting over the edge of the porcelain to step out of the claw foot tub. Water dripped off his body onto the floor mat beneath him, and it wasn't long before he stood right in front of her once more. Her eyes were on his chest - where her eye level pointed directly since he was so tall. She focused on the hard muscle beneath the skin, a protective layer of fat covering the muscle - he was dense and warm, the kind of body that you wanted to cuddle up to; the kind of chest that you wanted to fall asleep on. She didn't want to look in his eyes; instead she focused on the dark hair on his chest that the water droplets clung to, the hair that traveled down and down and down - No, she wasn't going to look there, either.

"Where'd all that fire go?" he murmured, his voice low and sensual. It was said so quietly that she wasn't even sure if he was talking to her or of if he was commenting to himself. She felt his fingertips graze the backs of her hands, then close around her clenched fists, including the one still holding the giant breadknife. From there his hands stroked a line all the way up to her elbows where he lifted her limbs and placed them around his neck. It was so much harder not to look at him now - she had to keep her head tilted downwards. "'Chelle," She closed her eyes to keep from looking up into his. His hands were on her face then, gently but firmly tilting her head back. She knew what was coming, and she knew once she hit that certain point she wouldn't want to say no, wouldn't want to tell him to leave.

When she felt his lips touch hers, she knew that point had come. There was no going back now.

౨ৎ

AN: I do not own the Watchmen franchise or any of it's characters. Michelle is my own OC. I also do not own the song 'Natural Born Sinner' by In This Moment. The above pictures are from pinterest, there's links attached that go back to the original posts.

part two

[himbohunnicutt]

Suspend your Disbelief in Revolution - Gwilym Lee x Original Female Character - Chapter 1

A/N: Hello! This is the first chapter of my Russian Revolution AU Gwilym Lee fic, niche I know. Please enjoy!

MASTERLIST

FIC ON AO3

Grand Duchess Ekaterina Nikolaevna of Russia ran down the halls of the Winter Palace, chased by her sisters. It was 11th July 1916, her 24th birthday. Her mother, Alexandra Feodorovna, still babied her, but her sisters, Olga, Tatiana, Maria, and Anastasia, treated her like an adult. She was always glad of their company as a result. Their little brother, Tsarevich Alexei shouted down after them, unable to run with them.

Ekaterina had always been the odd one out of the Tsar’s 6 children. She was the oldest, born two years after her father, the-then Grand Duke Nicholas and now Tsar Nicholas II, and her mother, Princess Alix of Hesse, had married. She was the golden child, the first girl. Once her sisters had started coming along, the pressure on her mother to produce a son and heir had increased tenfold with each daughter. By the time Anastasia was born, 9 years after Ekaterina, Alexandra (as Alix was known in Russia) was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Thankfully, little Alexei had arrived 3 years later and was suitably babied by both his parents. Alexandra babied all the children. Ekaterina hadn’t minded until she’d turned 18 and potential marriages had been arranged. She’d been unofficially engaged to Crown Prince Alexander of Serbia at the age of 19, but had turned him down when he got down on one knee and asked her. She didn’t love him, so why should she marry him, she’d argued to her father and his ministers the next day as the Crown Prince went back to Serbia with his tail between his legs.

Ekaterina had always believed in love. It was the one thing she truly believed in. She believed in God, of course, this is 1916 and she’s royalty, she has to, but love is the only thing that has properly captured her. She read copious amounts of romance novels and dreamed of finding somebody utterly perfect for her.That was the main reason she snuck out of the Palace so often. How would she meet the love of her life if she spent all of that life cooped up in Palaces and Castles away from the outside world?

She ducked behind a pillar as her sisters ran past, and quickly found her way to one of the secret passages shown to her by the servants. The passage led her directly to the outside world, to St Petersburg. She ducked out of the passage and into the summer air, jumping in the carriage that always took her into the city. Ekaterina thought her father might have an idea considering she always took a Palace carriage, but he hadn’t said anything and she was sure he would if he knew. She promised the driver that she’d be back in a few hours, and she made her way into St Petersburg. It had been renamed Petrograd nearly 2 years previously, but nobody in high society acknowledged it. It was, and always would be, St Petersburg to them. This time, though, she had permission from her mother. She’d been begging for a new dress for her birthday party and she’d been given permission to go alone. The only reason she’d snuck out was so her sisters didn’t join her.

She returned to the palace within a few hours with a cream embroidered dress in her possession. The boutique had been all too happy to fit it to her then and there, they couldn’t believe that a Grand Duchess had come in on her own.When she descended the grand staircase of the Winter Palace wearing it a few hours later to a huge crowd of foreign royalty, diplomats, politicians, aristocracy, and friends, she took the air out of the room with her beauty. She had always been considered the most beautiful of the Tsar’s daughters, but this moment sealed the deal. Her sisters, in matching white dresses, ran from the crowd to meet her, and the five of them almost paraded through the rooms, showing themselves off.

Ekaterina spent most of the party hiding in a corner, lest she be dragged into another dance by a diplomat or aristocrat three times her age. She felt somebody stand next to her, and she dreaded what she might see until she looked over.The man she locked eyes with wasn’t a lecherous diplomat. He was young, handsome, and offering her another glass of champagne.

“Thank you” she said quietly, only just loud enough to be heard over the noise of the room.

“You’re welcome” he replied, speaking Russian perfectly but with an accent.

“I’m Ekaterina”

“I gathered as much, Your Imperial Highness. I’m Gwilym”

“Gw-Gwilym?” She asked, faltering on the unusual name.

“That’s right. It’s Welsh. I’m British.” He explained. Ekaterina was surprised. She hardly ever met British people in Russia, especially since the war started.

“Why aren’t you fighting?” She asked. A young man like him should be in the Army or Navy.

“Eyesight.” He replied, pulling a pair of glasses from his pocket. 

“Did you hear about the latest developments on the Western Front, Your Imperial Highness”

“No, I don’t get any news of the war unless it directly affects me, and it’s Ekaterina” She said, turning to face him more. She really took in his face for the first time. Gentle, noble, handsome.

“I feel like I might get shot if I call you Ekaterina”

“Only if you do it in front of my father” Ekaterina joked, nodding in the direction of the Tsar, who was holding court with his ministers.

“Imposing fellow” Gwilym whispered as he watched the most powerful man in Eastern Europe make an awful joke, and receive a response befitting the world’s greatest comedian.

“Not particularly, he’s very gentle once you get to know him” Ekaterina replied, matching his volume. They watched him for a while, kissing socialites on the cheek as he marched through the room to be adored.

“I doubt that’ll happen” Gwilym mused.

“Why?” Ekaterina asked. To her, he seemed like a nice man that her father might like.

“I’m a Communist, Ekaterina. The sworn enemy of the Imperial family” Gwilym admitted, whispering in her ear.

“How are you in here, talking to me, then?” She replied, pulling back to look at him, stunned.

“I blagged my way in. I had to see what the fuss was about” He smirked, looking deep into her eyes.

“Fuss about what?” She asked. Gwilym was starting to see the innocence often attributed to the Grand Duchesses of Russia.

“You”

“Me?”

“Well it is your birthday” He explained.

“I know, I know, but I’m nothing special” She replied, looking down at herself disparagingly.

“I beg to differ” Gwilym replied, offering her his arm so they could dance.

[happypastelponies]

My Little Pony crossovers and collabs that I want to see happen- Part 1

(In no particular order)

Fashion

My Little Pony x Minori– this person is a revolutionary model who reinvented “Shironuri” (painted in white) street fashion in Harajuku, Japan. She has been featured in Vogue and has an international following. Moore often than not, her artistic outfits consist of soft and flowing pastels, which would work quite nicely with MLP’s image and pastel ponies. Ideally, the pony I would like to see utilized in this collaboration would be Rarity, who is also a fashionista and well versed in the art of style, but also Fluttershy, who has had her moment in the spotlight with modeling, but is also quite knowledgeable about sewing as well. Perhaps also to be considered is Celestia, as her color scheme would work nicely with the Shuronuri theme and iconic styles of Minori, who best utilizes the fashion; along with a possible dusting-off and reappearance of the g3 original character, Kimono in the style of g4 (or g5)- for obvious reasons.

My Little Pony x Moi-même-Moitié– this gothic lolita fashion brand is iconic in Japan, and was created by the visual kei gothic metal band, Malice Mizer/ Moi Dix Mois’ leader and guitarist, Mana. While the image of this brand doesn’t necessarily mesh with a bright and pastel little ponies, there are a few darker-themed lines of this popular toy brand that could work nicely with it; case in point, the Ponymania collection. While they seemed more like a mishmash of visual kei rock, gothic lolita, and sweet lolita all rolled into one, a second attempt at this Ponymania theme, in collaboration with Mana’s fashion brand, with Ponies such as Moonlight Raven, Rarity, Twilight Sparkle, Princess Luna, and Inky Rose would be perfect for this.

Music/ Vocals

My Little Pony x Yoshiki– a Japanese musician, songwriter, composer, record producer, and co-founder of the heavy metal visual kei band, X Japan. This guy is pretty major, as he was requested by the Japanese government to compose and perform a song for the Emperor’s coronation, has a radio station named after him, collabed with American comic book legends like Stan Lee and Todd McFarlane (as well as a guest of honor at Stan Lee’s Comikaze Expo), along with music legends like KISS, designed theme songs for the Golden Globe Awards, played a concert in Madiison Square Garden, has a hologram of himself, and so many more monumental achievements. As to why I think MLP should collab with him, he is a phenomenal musician and songwriter. If he were to work with Daniel Ingram or just standalone, I suspect that future songs for any reboot series for MLP would be equally exquisite.

Animation and Story Direction

My Little Pony x Hayao Miyazaki– One of Japan’s highly respected and most prominent film directors/ producer/screenwriter/ animator/ author, manga artist/ co-founder of studio Ghibli who is responsible for a laundry list of amazing animated films like Spirited Away (which won an Acadamy Award for best Animated Film (making it the only hand drawn animated film and non-English-language animated film to win that award), and was the highest-grossing animated film in Japanese history, and overtook Titanic, at the time, as highest-grossing film worldwide). A collab with this man would be refreshing, as like MLP, many of his works are characterized by themes such as environmentalism (humanity’s relationship with nature and technology), pacifism (the difficulty of maintaining a pacifist ethic in a violent world), feminism, love, and family. In addition, The protagonists of his films are often strong girls or young women. Miyazaki has described his female characters as “brave, self-sufficient girls that don’t think twice about fighting for what they believe in with all their heart”, stating that they may “need a friend, or a supporter, but never a saviour” and that “any woman is just as capable of being a hero as any man” For a show about ponies that promote love and friendship, a collab with a person such as this seems ideal.

Anime (Animation)/ Manga

My Little Pony x Cardcaptor Sakura– this is a crossover that I’ve expressed a desire to see made possible before. Read it in my blog here: https://happypastelponies.tumblr.com/post/170326310843/why-mlp-fim-should-crossover-with-cardcaptor

My Little Pony x Care Bears– this is a crossover that I’ve expressed a desire to see made possible before. Read it in my blog here: https://happypastelponies.tumblr.com/post/171670025613/are-my-little-pony-care-bears-related-theory

My Little Pony x Star Darlings– This would be an ideal collab to make a reality in order to promote Hasbro’s IP: Namely, through the production and promotion line of a g1 (perhaps anniversary related) spinoff that would allow them to finally produce a group of long-time prototype ponies called the “celestial ponies”/ “Fancy Swirl” ponies, especially since there has been a bit of hype amid the Gen 1 community of pony collectors, which they’ve been trying to get noticed and made by a company called Bridge Direct/ Basic Fun. With their celestial theme, they would pair and play nicely with the Disney Star Darling franchise in collaboration, whose characters are based off the 12 astrological symbols and live in a setting called Starland, in the celestial skies.

Voice Acting & Series Appearances

My Little Pony x Wanda Sykes– An American voice actor, comedian, and writer. This is one person who has quite a distinctive voice and plays in a number of comedic roles, such as “Granny Sloth” in “Ice Age”, “Stella the Skunk” in “Over the Hedge”, and “Barb Baran” in “The New Adventures of Old Christine”. She was also named one of the top 25 funniest people in America by Entertainment Weekly. There’s no doubt her memorable voice acting could bring a fresh dose of comedic relief on MLP, especially in union with Pinkie Pie.

My Little Pony x Whoopi Goldberg– An American actress, comedian, author, and tv host. She is one of the few people to have won an Oscar, a Grammy, Emmy, and Tony Award. Her voice is also iconic, and she has had many roles in films and series such as “Star Trek- the Next Generation”, “How Stella Got Her Groove Back”, “The Color Purple”, and “Sister Act”; while also VA’ing a character, “Shenzi the Hyena” in “The Lion King”. Due to her comedic and Voice acting background, she could also bring a hint of comedy and acting talents to the MLP series.

Other:

Moon Dreamers x Star Darlings– While not necessarily a My Little Pony related crossover, it is one with another one of Hasbro’s Intellectual Properties, “Moon Dreamers”. This would provide a good opportunity for Hasbro to dust off one of its older IP’s and revitalize a long dead toyline from the 80’s.

With Moon Dreamers, they are insanely similar to a more recent IP made by Disney, called “Star Darlings”. One IP’s characters works with dreams, while the other series’ characters works with wishes, and correct me if I’m wrong here, but those are both really identical professions. Especially where Disney is concerned, apparently. The lyrics of a classic song “when you wish upon a star” has verses that say the following: “A Dream is a wish your heart makes when you’re fast asleep”. The only difference is that while Moon Dreamers work in the world of slumber to grant kids their wishes/ dreams, Star Darlings work in the waking world to do the same. And Hasbro is no stranger to collaborating with Disney.

[raisinghellonstarbug]

Stumbled Into Laughter, Stumbled Into You Ch.2 - A James Acaster x Reader story

Basic plot: The year is 2019, and life has been quite dull for you since working in a job that you hate for the past two years after graduating from university. You used to do stand up comedy at uni, but you’ve been putting off pursuing it due to lack of confidence and motivation. Your best mates decide to encourage you to try a comedy mic night for the first time ever and while there you incidentally run into an old mate of yours, comedian Rhys James. That’s when your life gets turned around as you end up diving into the world of the comedy circuit and becoming close with other famous British comedians. In the midst of it all, you end up meeting a particularly distinctive red headed fellow who might end up being the very thing that brings meaning to your life again.

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A/N: Hi guys, apologies for the month delay! I hope you can forgive me. I'm like quite a few ao3 fanfic writers I guess. These things take time but I also like to make sure the writing is decent. I really appreciate those who have already given such enthusiasm to the story and have written lovely comments, it really does mean a lot.

Anyway life has been busy and so that's also why there has been a delay. Sooo I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint!

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The next chapter of the story is available on Archive of our Own if you prefer to read it there, otherwise scroll down further to read the latest full chapter below...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33748507/chapters/85854727

Rating: M

Characters: James Acaster (duh), Original Female Characters(s), Original Male Character(s), Rhys James, Ed Gamble, Nish Kumar, Josh Widdicombe

Relationships: James Acaster x Reader/you (female reader or gender ambigious if you prefer), Original female character/Original Male character

Story tags: Romantic comedy, domestic fluff, slow burn, fluff and smut, British comedy, eventual relationships

Chapter 2 word count: 2847

Chapter summary: You are ready to get home and tell your flatmates that you can't go through with performing on stage. Somehow it doesn't quite turn out that way.

It was Friday now and you still weren’t sure how to process last night. It amazed you how your friends had felt compelled to go behind your back like that and make such a hasty decision for you. Especially as you weren’t entirely prepared for it.

A part of you did wonder whether you had been a bit childish in your behaviour last night… and this morning. You knew grumping and pretending to ignore your best friends while leaving the house was probably a stupid way to handle the situation; but you didn’t feel very apologetic and stood by it.

But maybe they were trying to do a good thing for me. They meant well. They always do.

You sighed and took a sip of your tea while staring blankly at your laptop, knowing that you had work to get on with that wasn’t going to get finished if you just kept pondering about other things that would only distract you.

Nevertheless, you looked around the office, seeing your colleagues working hard at the desks, answering phone calls, and you couldn’t help but think about what the fuck am I doing here?

Maybe you would have the confidence to quit one day but today wasn’t that day.

You decided that this wasn’t the time to be spontaneous and go ahead with your best mates’ well intentioned plan. You would simply tell them that you politely decline and that you aren’t prepared to do the comedy gig this time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You got home just the same as you did yesterday - a clockwork routine.

And oddly enough it was more or less the same shit as yesterday. Grace came hurtling to your attention to blurt out something or other. You felt yourself preparing to roll your eyes as you weren’t up for the conversation that was probably about to happen.

Standing in the hallway with your jacket and shoes still on, your best mate hadn’t even given you the chance to settle down this time.

“So? Are you talking to us now?”

You sighed, and while feeling somewhat defeated by the heavy day, you put away your stuff in their rightful place. You turned back around to your best friend’s face, an expression of hope and uncertainty spread across it. Her eyebrows were raised in a manner that expected a response.

“Well - yes, I suppose so,” you grumbled while shrugging your shoulders.

Grace had her hands out in a gesture that you knew was likely to be followed with a speech of some kind, her face exhaling. She took a deep breath.

“Look. I’m sorry about yesterday. Perhaps me and Theo weren’t exactly thinking of what you might have wanted, but at the same time we can see you everyday coming home, seeing the look on your face. And we - we couldn’t see you looking like that anymore. We - I just want you to be happy. That’s all.”

You stared at your friend with a look of despondency. You weren’t really sure what to say. You nodded and mumbled, “Okay, I appreciate that.”

Theo then came out of the kitchen with his comfy jim jams on. He looked like he had just gotten out of bed. Maybe this was so. He had a glass of water in his hand and proceeded to try and give it to you gingerly. He gave you a timid smile. You gave him a slither of a smile with a hint of squinted eyes.

You took the glass and pointed at it, “What, have you poisoned this or something?”

Grace snorted and had her arms folded. Theo just stared at you with an inability to respond to such an accusation, except with a notion to speak but with stuttered whimpers coming out instead. Grace put her hand on Theo’s shoulder and shushed him. Even after all these years he still struggles to understand my sarcasm?

“Is this the sort of quick wit that we might expect from your stand up routine?” Grace retorted.

“Not exactly. More er - a whimsical observation.”

Grace smiled and gave you that look that you would probably give a lost puppy, and questioned, “Can’t you see that you’re destined for more than what you’ve got?”

“That’s sweet of you to say babe but I can’t do it. I really can’t.”

“But my dear yes, yes you can. Please - at least consider it! I mean hell, I’m up for a promotion at work as you know, and Theo really is going to start playing music again. He’s even working out a potential band with a couple of friends. You know he’s been between jobs anyway.”

You frowned with a snort and twitched your lips, “Wait. Theo has more than us two as friends?”

Ooo shit, was that a low blow even for me?

Theo scoffed and placed a hand on his hips, “I happen… to have… contacts in places.”

You scoffed harder, “Oh OK Theo. Sure. You have contacts. And I have a fairy godmother who grants my every wish!”

Theo winced a little and he almost looked upset. You were about to respond but you were cut off.

Grace chimed in again sarcastically, “Well - surely the fairy godmother has given you everything you want out of life then?” She then put her hands on her hips and a firm tone replaced the joking one, “Don’t pick on us because your life isn’t how you planned it.”

You pursed your lips together, arms folded and stared down at the floor. You felt yourself almost pouting like a child being told off.

“Ok fair enough - I’m sorry. I just. I can’t do this comedy gig guys. Please accept that I have to say no. You should understand why I can’t. It’s too hard. I don’t think I can handle the pressure.”

Theo and then Grace glimpsed at each other with a tug of a smug expression across both of their lips.

Theo asked, “Would a potential wager be of interest if you decided to do it?”

You pondered this for a moment and frowned, “And what exactly would I need to sign with my blood?”

Grace rolled her eyes and smirked, “Nothing that strenuous. Just… let’s say, a nice offer of perhaps a weekend away to the beach might sweeten the pot?”

“Are you saying we’ll go to the beach if I do this comedy gig?” Theo and Grace nodded in unison.

You contemplated this and thought for a moment if this was worth it for a weekend away.

But could I deal with the humiliation? Could I handle being heckled or booed off the stage? It’s not exactly like it went all that well the last time...

You huffed heavily and gritted your teeth, residing with a simple shrug of your shoulders. Amering

“Well look, if and I do mean if I decide to do this, then you guys are going to be there to support me right? I mean you can understand that I’m doing this against my will. I don’t really want to do this.”

That was seemingly a half lie. You did want to, but you were petrified.

Grace sarcastically quipped, “Oh sure, we’re totally holding a gun to your head.”

You were still standing in the hallway with your best mates looking at you wistfully, almost pleading with their eyes for you to agree to their demands. You rolled your eyes and huffed. You resignedly gave in.

“So. Which weekend would we go to the beach then?”

A gleeful smile was beginning to form on Grace’s lips.

“Does that mean you’ll do it?”

You scoffed, “Don’t hold your breath too hard-”

Grace yelped in excitement and wrapped her arms around you. You eventually fell into it with graciousness. Theo then has his arms wrapped around the both of you. You huffed slightly and then frowned, starting to squirm after you felt the gesture go on for too long. You felt them both release you.

Suddenly, your throat felt a bit hoarse, almost closing up. What you had just agreed to was now settling in your brain and you weren’t sure that it was a good idea after all.

“Oh, but guys… I’m terrified! What if I’m fucking awful?!”

Grace shushed you and placed a hand on your shoulder. She shook her head.

“You will be fine. It’s your first gig in a while. You can’t expect to be amazing straight away. But then - I’m your biggest fan so I might be a little biased,” she winked.

Theo agreed, “We both are. But that’s okay. At least you’ll have two people who will laugh at your jokes.”

You couldn’t help but let a grin escape from your lips and you shook your head in the despair that was your meddlesome but endearing friends.

Oh fuck, your brain freaked once more.

Can I really put myself through this again?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was Saturday now and you had pretty much spent almost all of the previous night figuring out old jokes that could still work and writing new ones. You knew it wouldn’t need to be a long set of gags. Just a handful of observational anecdotes and a few quick-witted punchlines. Thank fuck it’s only a 10 minute section at most.

You were unsure if you knew what anecdotes would work. I mean, you had your familiarities of the London communities, what might make them chuckle and what would be good to avoid to start off with. There might be a fair share of men so you were weary that being a woman was not always easy when it came to comedy. Somehow you had to figure out how to be as relatable as possible due to being an unknown entertainer.

You took a deep breath while looking at yourself in the mirror while finishing up the touches of light makeup and took one more glance at your face and the outfit you decided to wear. You chose a classy maroon coloured jumpsuit with nude stilettos. You wore hoop earrings and a nice necklace to match.

Just as you were about to head out of the door, Grace came in almost disruptably and looked straight down at what you were wearing.

She smiled and nodded approvingly, “Yes - I approve. You look gorgeous my dear.”

“Cheers my dear! I hope it won’t be too busy tonight.”

“It will be fine. You’ll be fine. Remember - we will be with you there.”

Grace gestured for you to take more deep breaths like you had practiced with her before. It felt silly but absolutely necessary. She then grabbed your hand and you both scattered to head out the door together with Theo following close behind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was time and you felt your legs shaking. As you stood behind the curtains backstage, you had your friends in the very front of the crowd as a matter of reassurance. It wasn’t a huge venue, perhaps around sixty people at most would have been there. You kept taking further deep breaths, waiting for your name to be announced by the host.

You then heard a few laughs that were being directed to the comedy act before you. It was weird to hear someone else performing but not being able to concentrate on a single word they said while you were panicking in the back.

You wished you could concentrate on something else, but no matter what, you couldn’t shake the fact that you were about to be up there, and if the guy before you was really funny, then how the hell were you supposed to follow through after that?

You shook your head to will away those thoughts of disbelief. It wasn’t going to help to compare yourself to the guy before you or to put yourself down. And so instead you stood up, took one last deep inhale and exhale, and held your head up high with a smile across your face as you knew any minute you would have to walk out and pretend you weren’t nervous as all hell.

As the comedian before you said his thanks and waved the audience goodbye, the host of the show then took over the mic and bellowed in a deep voice, “thank you everyone, that was Jamali Maddix! Let’s give him another round of applause!”

You frowned as though you recognised that name from somewhere else. Maybe he is a well known comedian. Perhaps a local one. But it was far from what you needed to think about right now. Stupid brain. You politely clap along with everyone else as though you had been listening. You felt almost guilty that you hadn’t but it was too late to worry about it now. It was now your turn.

“Ok folks, so thankfully that isn’t the end of the night! We also have two more comedians for you to enjoy, and the next one is new, so give her some pity laughs so she doesn’t go home crying too hard. Give it up, for Y/N!”

You took your steps leisurely onto the stage, pulling a face as a reaction to the host and retorting, “Don’t worry guys, I already cry at home alone at night. It won’t have anything to do with the shitshow that is about to ensue!” A couple of hearty chuckles and laughs filled the room.

“And it went all downhill from there…” you spoke further with a whimsically hard stare at the audience. You saw Grace and Theo sitting at the front past the harsh overhead light. You swore you caught a glimpse of Grace rolling her eyes, but they chuckled just the same.

You spoke with a deadpan expression and voice - “So hello and good evening. I’m Y/n as already introduced. And well, I don’t really know what I’m doing here really. I guess this was better than throwing up after a few pints and a kebab-’ a pause for laughter.

‘...although I suppose you probably thought I would be at home drinking wine and eating chocolate, because apparently that’s what women are always doing.” A couple of guffaws and slight jeering reactions, coupled with some laughter.

You didn’t know what to do with your body. You wondered if you were using your arms and your facial expressions enough to further enunciate your points, but by the time you went on to say your next few jokes, you had managed to forget what you thought you should be doing and just go with the flow.

5 minutes in...

“My dad is a simple fellow. I don’t suppose anyone else has noticed how most dads will laugh? There are two different ways in my experience. Either they’re laughing softly, that little chuckle at something that they either feel weirded out by, or that secret envy for the other person who said the joke. ‘Oh shit, I wish I had said that…’ and while thinking about it, holding back laughter because they wish they had come with it first.”

You further continue: “But the other one, the more distinct laugh… is the one where they could be heard for miles. A roaring, obnoxious cackle that you could imagine how a 1950’s jazz singer would laugh. The forty cigars that he smoked that day curdling in his throat, you know just adding extra gruff to it. It’s that boisterous chortling that can be heard from somewhere in Asia or something. There is no inbetween. It’s funny because my dad pretty much wishes he were a 1950’s jazz singer…”

As you finished the punchline of the joke you then felt yourself return back to the room. It was like you lost yourself on stage and just told the jokes to get them done and over with so you wouldn’t have to concentrate too much on the crowd. You made eye contact with some people but couldn’t be sure with who. You saw them laughing but didn’t focus on the sound…

You were just glad that the ten minutes were up and you actually had stood on stage again.

The next time won’t feel as daunting. Will there be a next time?

You no longer feel dread that you were there in front of all these people. You were then finishing off and saying your thanks. You smiled wide and appreciated those that enjoyed your performance. It seemed that you had done alright. You were just grateful you got some people to laugh. A round of applause was given to you and you waved.

Now you could step off the stage and feel normal again. But despite this, a sense of glee overwhelmed you. You couldn’t deny that you enjoyed being up there again after all this time. You couldn’t help but compare this evening to your day job. And you swore at yourself when you realised that you had to admit that there was no comparison to this and your boring office work.

You had to knowingly admit defeat to Grace and Theo. They knew you better than you did yourself.

You knew that you would have to quit your day job as soon as possible.

----

[rockyzbm39643-blog]

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[chanxyeollie]

more questions!1!

lmao tagged by my fave @stan-the-best-stan-monsta-x,,, u know one day i’m gonna tag u in SOMETHING

Rules: Answer 20 questions and tag 20 followers you’d like to get to know better. 1. Name: Aluri 2. Nicknames: well people have just picked apart Aluri into Ali, Luri, Lu, etc., so any of those i guess? 3. Zodiac sign: capricorn but fyi i am not the hardworking type so maybe that’s all a lie 4. Height: 164cm/5″4 i believe? 5. Orientation: straight 6. Nationality: British 7. Favourite fruit: um.....i don’t...have one? is it weird if i say lemon? 8. Favourite season: spring or autumn 9. Favourite book: Clockwork Princess by Cassandra Clare even though i sob without fail every time i read the ending. 10. Favourite flower: uhh... orchids are nice 11. Favourite scent: the cinnamon bun incense we have downstairs! 12. Favourite colour: black/pink 13. Favourite animal: wolf (chogiwaaaa) 14. Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: can i cheat and say half coffee, half hot chocolate? 15. Cat or dog: cats because as i’ve said i can’t betray my cat lady reputation 16. Favourite fictional character: Sita bc she’s a badass 17. Number of blankets you sleep with: ideally as many as possible but as of now two 18. Dream trip: i want to go back to NYC but this time without a strict time limitation. i just wanna explore, man! 19. Blog created: o fuck like 2014 or something??? yeah i think so because originally this was a sims blog (lol) and TS4 wasn’t released yet. 20. Number of followers: 121 - thx to all u porn-bot blogs doing ur part to both up my follow count and horrify me every time i wonder who u are

Second tag:

Nickname: here’s a different one: in my last year of high school it was ‘mom’ because of who i am as a person Gender: Female Star Sign: Capricorn Height: 5″4 - btw for the longest time i thought i was 5″7 which remains untrue Time Right Now: 10:41 pm (this is queued so i guarantee it will not be this actual time when it comes out) Last Thing I Googled: lenny face LMAO aka this guy  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Favorite Bands: ah here let me refer to my trusty list;;; bts, topp dogg, exo, bigbang, seventeen, SHINee, Monsta X and non kpop: 5SOS, PVRIS, Marianas Trench Favorite Solo Artist: shit who do i listen to um Ailee and alternatively Lady Gaga lol Song Stuck In Your Head: i’m listening to music right now so that’s occupying my head instead right now but earlier it was Adore U - Seventeen Last Movie I Watched: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Last TV Show I Watched: lol Produce 101 When Did You Create Your Blog: 2014 What Kind of Stuff Do You Post: hmmm pretty much kpop stuff with some tiny bits of fashion/meme worthy posts sprinkled in When Did Your Blog Reach its Peak: um well this post got the most notes?? so i guess we’ll say then, i gained like 2 followers in that time wow amazing - but listen i love that post and i still laugh when i see it Do You Have Any Other Blogs: um yes but they’re unimportant and mostly placeholders Do You Get Asks Regularly: once in a blue moon Why Did You Chose Your URL: (lmao Réka bb i love yours) well my last one was a teen wolf one which i no longer post about so i just wanted a name that had someone i liked in it and thus chanxyeollie was born, but it was very close between that and ffschanyeol fun fact Following: 470 Posts: 4605 - my likes are more than three times the amount and i have!!! ONE THOUSAND!!! things saved to my drafts no joke its a problem Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff Pokemon Team: yikes i don’t remember which one i picked tbh Favorite Colors: black and pink Average Hours of Sleep: between 7-9, i use sleepyti.me to get the best amount of sleep lol Lucky Numbers: 16. that’s it. Favorite Characters: Sita, Will Herondale, Captain America, Quicksilver off the top of my head lol What Are You Wearing Right Now: a ~free~ university t-shirt, sweatpants, polar bear socks How Many Blankets Do You Sleep With: 2 or more because otherwise the night creatures will eat me Dream Job: something entertainment related, idk i think it would maybe fun to be a comedian or something Dream Trip: NYC hellooooo for the 6438946th time i have no one to tag D: so like ANYONE AT ALL PLEASE help a sister out lol