#the clarinet squeaks

[secondclarinet]

instruments ranked by wetness. based on my observations and experiences

french horn. they always spend sooo long on those spit valves

oboe and bassoon because of the reed soaking

clarinet. sooo much water in the keys

sax

every other brass instrument idk

flute. driest wind instrument for sure

all strings and percussion I suppose

[milotonin]

chat

don’t rage quit your instrument just change the mouthpiece

i think the same could be applied to life 🫡

[kylejsugarman]

i was falling back asleep and having a rush of thoughts and one of the last ones was "jesse is 1 clarinet tall" and i was like "oh man thats gonna kill, i should post that when I woke up" and then i woke up with a raging fever

[yisanged]

today at lessons my teacher tried to teach me double tonguing and she was like for some people this takes a long time to learn so don't get too frustrated if you don't get it immediately and i did. it's not perfect i can't do it super fast yet which is like the whole point but i can do it which is slay. i'm just that good at bassoon guys

[humanthatishuman]

THANK YOU FISH you've reminded me I need to practice my clarinet :D

choose a new skill you'd like to practice!

[starry-wren]

why does bad quality music sound so damn good. like you could be recording vocals on your iPhone microphone and screaming and sobbing while someone who hasn’t touched and instrument in their life plays the violin awfully and it will be the best thing ever and I will be in tears.

[stqrsworn]

i can't remember why i have 4 clarinets but what i do know is that none of them can play a C# (please help it has to be me what do i do)

[su-nioj]

The scene when Cartman played the clarinet both entertained and broke me as a clarinet player because the squeaking-

[crazykattisontheinternet]

Sanders sides headcannons

Organized by person/side!!

Patton! 🐾

Patton wants to keep both of his dark babies (Janus and Virgil) happy, so he'll squash his fear of horror movies to bond with them.

Patton hates thunderstorms and is very embarrassed of it (cuz "dads don't get scared") but Virgil shares noise canceling headphones

Patton hates driving because of one thing. His road rage. When he's with other people he can hide it, but, when he's by himself he tends to call people a meanie-face if they cut him off.

Janus 𓆗

Janus can play 5 different instruments! (Piano, Clarinet, Flute, Percussion and Guitar)

If Janus gets to a certain point of embarrassment or if he feels threatened, He rattles.

Janus is a G O D at cooking. He can whip up a 5 star dish that Thomas hasn't even heard of before.

Roman 𓃬

Roman makes Virgil work out with him so they are both very fit, and Patton tries to participate, but he doesn't want to lose his dad squishiness.

Roman sings in the shower.

Remus ଳ

Remus can throw his voice and do a perfect impression of a feminine sounding voice. He loves using them both to cry for help and catch the attention of a very confused Roman.

He has a massive fish tank that he has with little sharks and octopi in it.

Virgil 🕸️

Virgil will absolutely combust if he receives a kiss on the forehead. This has happened once. Patton, being the dad he is, went into Virgil's room to find his goth baby and just found Virgil on his bed, red in the face, squeaking.

When Virgil gets scared, he grabs the nearest person bridal-style in case he needs to escape.

Virgil is a G O D at math. What takes Logan two minutes and a calculator takes Virgil seconds at most.

Virgil will use anyone as a pillow. You have some extra chub on your bones like Patton? Extra cushioning, let me lay on you. Muscular like Roman? A nice sturdy frame that'll provide support, Let me lay on you. You're bulky and beefy like Remus? Like laying on a cloud, let me lay on you. You're skinny and well built like Janus? A perfect combination of all previous body types, let me lay on you!

Logan 𓄿

Logan is deathly scared of needles. Getting vaccines, shots or even seeing a needle will cause the blood to drain from his face.

[pr0cyon-lotor]

Learning with Fuh'fin: Drums?

Fuh'fin scurried over to the main lounging area after a crash. Where he expected to see a fallen crew member groaning in pain after falling from a worrying height (again), instead he found everyone perfectly fine and playing with... drums?

 

Not like any he had seen before. He'd seen other space dwellers have different forms of drums. Some were made out of hide or skin. One type was made using the membrane of a blob creature from an aquatic planet. However, those became illegal after the species almost died out due to production.

 

Fuh'fin approached, and Vi-Vi finally seemed to notice him. She smiled and waved him over. He picked up his pace and trotted over. He looked up at the navigator.

 

"Do you know about drums?" She asked politely. "Yes, I've seen many from other races, and even the Yimex have their own variant," he answered with a chirp-like sound.

 

Vi-Vi chuckled. "We should order one so you can teach us how to play," she offered, and Fuh'fin's tail wagged in excitement. He always loved it when the crew was willing to learn about his species. He loved telling everyone about his home life.

 

Another bang, and Fuh'fin looked at the strange drums. "What drums are those?" He asked as he watched a crew member strike them with a small stick. Most of the time, Fuh'fin hadn't seen other races use a tool for drums. The Yimex use their tails to strike the surface, so it was interesting.

 

"Marching drums. Ella wanted to show everyone how fast she used to play in high school, and everyone is trying to replicate her," Vi-Vi said while putting a hand on her hip. "I never played percussion. I used to play the clarinet," she laughed mostly to herself.

 

Fuh'fin looked at Vi-Vi, trying to understand everything through context clues before giving up. "Highschool?" was his first question.

 

"Education. Typically higher in the types we have on earth," Vi-Vi explained patiently. Fuh'fin took the information and tried to make sense of it.

 

Education was a newer concept for the Yimex. They never needed it before. They used to be war bound, so there was no use for school, like most races needed it. They had relied on instinct.

 

That has changed recently, but only after Fuh'fin left his mother planet. He never experienced it. The closest thing he had to education was job training.

 

But he quite preferred to learn as he went. He learned how to read multiple languages without a translator, just fine. So the concept of school was still hard for Fuh'fin to wrap his head around, but he understood it in theory.

 

So the word "highschool" was explained. Now, for the other word that confused him, "Marching drums? Like battle drums?" He asked.

 

Vi-Vi hummed in thought, her hand moving to scratch her head, the red of her hair much more faded than it once was. Fuh'fin was told it wasn't an indication of illness but a cosmetic choice. Like berries staining his fur, as he was told. Just a more permanent berry stain.

 

"Sort of," Vi-Vi ended up saying. "Not for war per se. Not anymore, at least. Just a relic of times past," she explained.

 

Fuh'fin thought about it and came up with a comparison. "Oh, like how the Yimex still wear imitation crustacean armor even though we stopped being at war with the crustacean species on our planet?" He said proudly.

 

Vi-Vi hummed. "Sometimes you say some metal stuff, Fuh'fin," she said. Fuh'fin had no idea what that meant, but from her tone and body language, it was a compliment. Also, metal is a strong material, so she was probably calling him strong. And that's always good.

 

"Thank you," he responded with a few subconscious dooks. "You're sweet," Vi-Vi said, and Fuh'fin did know what that meant. He dooked a little louder.

 

"Oh yeah, I meant to ask. What's a clarinet?" He asked after he calmed down. 

 

Vi-Vi chuckled. "An instrument I could never play well. It always squeaked," she said as if admitting to something. It didn't mean much to Fuh'fin since he still had no idea what a clarinet was. He knew that squeaking was bad. He hated the sound of anything that squeaked; it hurt his ears.

 

"Still? What is it?" He asked again with clear confusion. "Hm, maybe I'll show you when we have time," Vi-Vi offered.

 

Fuh'fin was about to agree when the steady beat on the drum changed to an unsteady crash. He turned over and saw that Ella had given her drum to someone else. It was clear the other didn't know how to play as steadily as she did.

 

Fuh'fin scratched his ear; it felt like it was rubbing his head wrong. "I should return to patrolling," he muttered, hoping no one thought he was being rude for running away.

 

Vi-Vi laughed. "I'll tell Hugo to play jazz in the lounge later. I think you'd like it," she said as Fuh'fin trotted away from the awful beat. He wanted to respond, but the urge to leave won out. 

 

Once he escaped, he stopped and realized he had one more question.

 

"What is jazz?" 

[the-last-thread-of-my-sanity]

Okay here’s a textpost no one asked for about what instrument I think each of the 104th cadets would play in a concert band or orchestra with little to no explanation. I’ve been listening to a lot of concert and classical pieces lately and the brain rot got to me.

Eren- Trombone. He’s piss poor at the slides at first and he keeps hitting people in the head with it if you sit in the row in front of him.

Mikasa- First Chair Violin. Don’t try and get into the practice room, she already booked it.

Armin- Guitar/Bass. He either barely gets to play or he’s the focus of the piece. The only one who knows how to set up an amp or a microphone.

Jean- Saxophone. He feels himself a little too much when he has a solo.

Connie- Drums/Percussion. Thought he got assigned his instrument because he can’t sit still. Discovers swing rhythms in jazz and is actually quite good.

Sasha-Clarinet. Gets yelled at and kicked out when she ruins the piece with too many squeaks. Once tried to play with food in her mouth.

Historia-Harp. She’s the pretty one. Brings people to tears with how graceful she looks when she plays.

Ymir-Cello. Likes that she can manspread while she plays. Will elbow you if you sit next to her, mostly on purpose.

Marco- Flute. Not much explanation needed I feel like.

Annie- Piano. She practices almost as much as Mikasa. Prefers classical. Don’t ask her to be an accompanist, she doesn’t care enough about you to help out.

Bertholdt- French Horn. Will ask you where we are in the music when he inevitably zones out.

Reiner- Tuba. Always gets asked to move chairs onstage before the concert and shows off how many he can carry.

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

What’s everyone’s musical abilities like?

Bwaaaah I know I've answered something like this before, but i'm sure it was a while ago, and thus probably on the other blog, and I don't feel like searching for it, and I'm sure my thoughts have changed....so! NEW THOUGHTS

(I know they're under influence of tea here but I've not only absorbed this into my psyche BUT it also supports my propaganda of Cole being left-handed ANYWAY–)

Kai: Can't actually play any kind of instrument, until taking up guitar lessons from Jay. Is also an insane singer when he really tries. (...I think I also gave him the saxophone in the past but I can't REMEMBER)

Jay: Has been noted to play electric guitar (not JUST under tea influence, y'all know he can shred as Superstar Rockin' Jay), but can't really play anything beyond that, though he has tried.

Cole: Dude, his dad is a musician and a producer; there's very few main instruments he can't play. His main go-tos are piano (as already seen), bass, acoustic guitar, and the drums, but his favorite thing is to DJ and make his own mixes when inspired. Can also play violin fluently, but hates the violin snksksnkn

Zane: I can see him playing keyboard, saxophone, clarinet, a little flute, and violin; just depends on if he's a classical mood or an experimental one. It's very easy for him to learn though due to Being Robot~

Nya: Has attempted every instrument she could get her hands on, but wound up taking to the drums (courtesy of Olivia)

Lloyd: Can't currently play an instrument, but as he now in band class, he'd better pick something! *cough* it's gonna be the flute in honor of his uncle *cough* Can also sing, but prefers to be backing vocals as opposed to the main event.

Jesse: Cannot play an instrument at all, but as demonstrated, can sing his little heart out when motivated (to the point that Cole manages to talk him into a recording a song or two with him heeheeee)

Olivia: DRUMMER (and a bit of bassist and singer when the mood strikes)

Antonia: Cannot play an instrument whatsoever; had to squeak by with the recorder when she was forced to take a music class

Harumi: Her uncle "encourages" her to learn an instrument to round out her skillset. She picks the harp.

Miranda: Can "play" the trumpet. ...just not well. Her real strength lies in utilizing a synthesizer.

Pixal: Can technically play any instrument, but is very....mechanical with her approach. She has been told her harmonica-playing is a favorite of others, however. (Zane has it recorded in the event that ninja find themselves in jail...which happens a lot?!?)

Skylor: She can play a ukelele, timpani drum, and steel drums!!

Sunni: She plays a mean clarinet!!! Was also in choir class with Jesse, so she's got a nice soprano voice on her too!

Harleigh: TAMBOURINE

[tg-headcanons]

Two thoughts:

Does the ccg use dogs to sniff out ghouls? If they do, i almost imagine they would develope a specific, ghoul hunting breed - one with an excellent sense of smell but, unlike most hunting dogs, with no instinct to bite or attack their prey but rather to just find, follow, surround and hold in place (a bit like a rhodesian ridgeback, perhaps.) After all, the dog trying to attack the ghoul would absolutely not end well at all for the dog

And

I imagine some instruments must be more grating on ghoul ears then others - i.e. a piano, for example, will generally sound nice as long as it's in tune and so i imagine ghouls wouldn't have much of an averse reaction to that instrument, even if its a beginner playing. But say, for example, you have a beginner clarinet whose instrument squeaks and shrieks like a cat that just got its tail shredded — i cant imagine that would pair terribly well with their hearing

GHOUL HUNTING DOGS GHOUL HUNTING DOGS (IVE NEVER CONSIDERED THIS BEFORE BUT MY DOG DAYCARE EMPLOYEE ASS IS GOING WILD)

The practice of using dogs to search for ghouls is a very old one, but despite falling out of practice around the 1960s due to breed health problems and more effective methods being discovered, some of them are still around like other breeds no longer used for their original purpose

Arracht hounds are an old breed that split off from Bloodhounds. They were meant to track and hunt, but some had a behavioral quirk of howling and snarling at their prey rather than attacking, alerting humans of their location but quick to scare off animals and a liability to hunts. They were mostly deemed useless bloodhounds, until a small community in rural Ireland during the Middle Ages had one of their bloodhounds do this alert display at a seemingly normal human who was later discovered to be the monster preying on their village

The breed started to be cultivated for ghoul detection. They eventually ended up as tall, long legged and wrinkly animals bred to shriek and follow their marks, and trained to seek the smell of ghouls. Before the invention of better methods, these dogs were revolutionary and often the best detection system anyone could get. They were trained to stay out of a ghoul’s grasp to keep making as much noise as possible for as long as possible until humans could show up, and their wrinkly, loose skin made it easy for them to escape, better to lose a handful of skin than be killed

This obviously wasn’t a perfect system. A lot of those dogs, even the best bred and trained, didn’t survive their encounters. Others would find false positives and cause their attending humans to attack and kill other humans. Still, back then, an imperfect alarm was better than nothing. Many places in Europe became very dangerous for ghouls, and as those dogs spread through the world it only got worse for them

Eventually the dogs fell out of use. With better methods such as rc testing discovered they were no longer the most reliable source, and both human rights organizations citing the amount of innocent humans they got killed and animal rights groups citing how many of the dogs get killed, there was less and less reason to keep them on. The final straw was just how bad the breed got. Over time the breed developed issues the same as any other, but this one had a tendency to lose hearing and eyesight early and get neurotic and dangerous when working around ghouls for too long, so most ghoul extermination organizations retired the Arracht Hounds

Most of them are now housepets, some are trying to retrain them into guard or hunting dogs, and a few rural ghoul hunting organizations still use them, but for the most part they don’t work anymore. Every once and awhile there’s a headline of a ghoul getting caught when a family’s Arracht hound went wild over an inconspicuous neighbor, but that’s as far as it goes. People in cities are advised against getting them. They shriek very loud and maybe it’s all false positives, but you really don’t want to know just how many ghoul are around you

And as for the instruments: the ghoul hatred of squeaky clarinets and trumpets is visceral. They will actively avoid middle schools and music shops where kids are learning to play them

[geodethecrow]

*cymbal crash*

YOU'RE LISTENING TO

*clarinet squeak*

102.7

*piano slide*

BAND ROOM RADIO

*off key saxophone plays careless whisper*

WHERE WE PLAY NOTHING BUT TUNINGS, TWIDDLES, AND GENERAL BAND KID CHAOS

*trombone car noise*

THIS IS NOT YOUR BAND DIRECTOR'S STATION

*Radioactive by Imagine Dragons starts playing*

[majesty-perfectgrey]

my bass clarinet is edging me :(

It's squeaking instead of playing the right notes