#the amount of times i had to google simple words is honestly embarrassing

[lost-in-fandoms]

Part 2 from this post. Here part 1. This is not very happy, I'm sorry.

cw: (sort of) discussion of dub-con of the heat variety, mentions of sexual content.

Hissing+growling

It's late afternoon when Daniel comes out of the bathroom, holding his shirt in his hands and considering if it would be worth it to put it back on again.

Max is asleep now, splayed under the sheets with a small frown on his face, but the room is still permeated by the sweet smell of hormones and the sticky one of slick and cum, and Daniel can tell the heat is not quite over yet. It makes some alpha part of him deeply content, to have their scents intertwined like this and a satisfied omega in his bed, despite all the other mixed feelings turning in his brain at the moment.

He had finally managed to talk to Christian, just before his shower, to inform him and also to ask what the fuck, and the man had confirmed what Daniel had suspected since the night before: this was not one of Max's scheduled heats. It probably was part of the reason why it had hit Max like that, hard and fast, barely giving Daniel any time to get him out of the club and to the hotel without giving their pr people a massive headache.

And now he is left with this: Max naked and spent in his bed, and a very big question mark above the state of their personal and professional relationship.

He's considering slipping back into the sheets, alpha instincts screaming at him to go back to touching his the omega, or maybe texting Michael to have a big freak out about the whole situation, when someone knocks at the door.

He makes it over as quickly as possible, knowing it's probably the food he has ordered for himself and Max, but he still hears Max shift behind him, making a small snuffling sound that makes Daniel smile.

He's still smiling as he drags the little food cart inside, turning into the room, ready to feed his the omega, a good morning on his tongue when Max hisses at him.

It almost happens in slow motion. Daniel turns towards the bed, meeting Max's wide eyes. Max recoils, sitting up so fast Daniel can almost see him getting dizzy. Max's confused expression flickers to fear for a second before shuttering closed. And then he hisses at Daniel.

Daniel instinctively steps back, raising his hands and curling his shoulders inwards, trying to make himself as non-threatening as possible, brain already scrambling to find the reason why Max is upset.

"Max, what..." he can't even finish the question before Max is hissing again, pulling the sheets higher to cover his chest. His hands are shaking.

"Max," Daniel tries again, softer this time, forcing the hurt out of his voice, every alpha part of him screaming to fix this. "Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

Max shakes his head, baring his teeth a little, pressing his back into the headboard harder.

"What did you do to me?" he bites out, voice hoarse. Images from the last twelve hours surge through Daniel's mind, Max opening up so well for him, moaning around his knot, drool on his chin, tears streaming down his cheeks. Max on his hands and knees, back arching under Daniel's hand. Max pulling at Daniel's hair, dragging his face into the crook of his neck, right above his mating gland.

"I didn't do anything, mate," Daniel answers, knowing immediately it's the wrong thing to say when Max hisses again.

"You, you...knotted me!" There's a blush high on Max's cheeks, spreading further as he spits the words, embarrassment and anger mixing in a dangerous cocktail.

"Yes? You were in heat, and you asked..."

"I would not ask!" Max interrupts him, fists closing harder around the sheets, voice growing louder and higher. "You should have left me!"

It's a hit to Daniel's ego, this straight up refusal from Max that he would even want to spend his heat with him, but he decides to save that hurt for later, having bigger problems at hand.

"Max," he says, forcing himself to keep his voice patient and level, "I couldn't have left you like that, you were in pain. And you did ask me."

"Then you should have said no!"

Daniel doesn't understand. He gets it, that Max is confused, probably still a little out of it from his heat, but Daniel had been good to him. He had treated him right. He doesn't understand where all this anger and fear is coming from. He was helping!

"Listen, if you tell me who's your usual heat buddy I will call them for you, okay? So they can help you with the rest of it." It hurts, to even suggest it. No part of his alpha instincts wants him to leave the omega alone, no part of him wants to leave Max like this, but he knows how important it is for omegas to be comfortable during their heats, and if Max isn't comfortable with him anymore, then they'll have to sort this all out another time.

He's expecting Max to relax a little, but he bristles instead, blush deepening.

"Fuck you, I do not have a heat buddy," he spits, crossing his arms. Daniel's traitorous eyes linger a little on the swell of his chest under the sheets, the bulge of his biceps, before he's able to get a hold on himself.

Wait, no heat buddy?

"Max, was this the first..."

Again, Max doesn't let him finish, hissing loud and angry at him. Daniel's brain stumbles, too much sudden confusing information, and he fucks up.

He growls back, irritated.

The reaction is immediate. Max's eyes widen and he slumps, bowing forward until his forehead is almost touching his knees, back of his neck exposed in submission even before Daniel has the chance to start being horrified in himself.

"Shit," he swears, taking a step towards the bed and then stopping when Max flinches. "Max, I didn't mean..."

Max's shoulders are shaking. Daniel feels nauseous.

"Max, I swear, I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry."

He backs away until he's pressed against the wall furthest away, watches as Max slowly straighten his back, pulling the sheet up with him. There's a blankness on his face that wasn't there before. The room smells sour, upset omega scent overpowering everything else.

"I want you to leave, Daniel" Max says, his voice just as flat as his expression.

Daniel doesn't know if his body is supposed to feel like this, if his heart is supposed to be beating this way.

"Max, I'm sorry," he pleads, some part of him acutely aware that if he leaves this room now, they'll never be the same. He'll never be the same.

Max doesn't say anything else, just looks down at his lap, looking small in the dirty sheets, distressed scent like hands around Daniel's throat.

Daniel picks up his phone and wallet, weirdly glad he had gotten dressed again before opening the door so he doesn't have to prolong this strange walk of shame now. He feels disconnected from his own body, everything feeling wrong wrong wrong.

"You should call Christian, let him know when you'll be leaving," is somehow what his voice decides to say, instead of any of the questions and apologies his brain is currently screaming.

He just barely hears Max's first sob over the click of the door locking behind him.

[harmoni-me]

a poly komahinanami + reader request comin' through!: teaching crush reader emotions and how they work, how to interact with people, also stuff like romance, friendships, and having a real family.

thank you! don’t forget to stay hydrated!💙

My oh my, guess who’s back!? And with the longest story I’ve ever written just for you at that! This totaled up to be 17 pages on a Google Docs document, which is absolutely crazy by the way, but I just couldn’t stop writing this! But it’s now done, so I hope you enjoy!

Nagito Komaeda x Hajime Hinata x Chiaki Nanami x Reader Who Wants to Rediscover Emotions!

“Ugh...so not even that, huh…” Chiaki crashed onto a nearby sofa, slamming her face into a plush pillow, catching herself with a comfortable squish. You had just been shown one of those guilt-trip puppy adoption videos to try and kick-start your tear ducts, but it just honestly didn’t work. Though you desperately wanted the tears to flow, or at least have your eyes a little misty, nothing ever came. You couldn’t help it, but you were willing to do anything in order to feel, and know about everything that has to do with fruitful human emotion.

Just a mere few weeks before this moment, you were left with no one, going to a school for the talented and the elite. You did some research about social gestures, wanting to know what to do if someone wanted to talk to you. 

Well, apparently you did something okay, because now you were sitting here with three people who are bumbling around, trying to figure out your emotional and social problems. It was most likely luck that you met these three that wanted to help you out of your own ditch, but you definitely weren't complaining. Not one bit.

You had people by your side, and you felt something warm bloom in your stomach when you realized as such. It was nice, like when you let the sun soak up into the pores of your skin on some sandy shores.    

“Well, It’s not really their fault, you know? They were raised to be the Ultimate Perfectionist, their family must have done some terrible things in order for them to get this way...those bastards…” Hajime sat up against a wall, weaving his fingers into his hazelnut hair.

“Even though you’re simply reserve-course leftovers...you’re not wrong, Hajime. (Y/n) is in quite a predicament, wouldn’t you say?” Nagito laid cross-legged next to Hajime. Hajime just simply rolled his eyes at the white-haired boy's remark about his useless school status.

“Just a theory, but does talent honestly determine status? Wouldn’t it be like comparing someone’s grade’s to their natural IQ? Someone could simply just work harder, Nagito, and it’s that simple, most likely, to get on an Ultimate’s level.” You looked at Nagito, causing him to stiffen just a bit. 

…uh

Was it something you said? 

“Ah, (Y/n), your glaring. Practice softening your eyes a little bit. Giving off a serious look can make people uncomfortable sometimes.” Chiaki pointed out, gesturing to her own eyes, switching between a glare, and back to normal again, as if giving you a quick tutorial.

“Ah, um, sorry about that. I had no such intentions, so please forgive me, Nagito.” You bowed your head in forgiveness, already knowing what that gesture ment from social experience. Nagito just shook his head, causing his hair to sway along rhythmically, chuckling a little while doing so.

“No worries, please scold me whenever you please. I enjoy it.” Nagito let out a beaming laugh, shoulders bouncing at his own comment.

Hajime just clipped his thumb and index finger onto the upper-bridge of his nose, shaking his head to Nagito’s comment. Though, he could never stay mad at him for long… even with all of the degradation talk.

“Ok then, we need to get back to the situation at hand, because I have an idea!” Chiaki spoke out, making everyone in the room turn their head, ready to hear her out. The girl then picked herself up from the couch to stand tall among all of the sitting frames in the room.

“This situation is exactly like finally getting that shiny Pokemon you’ve always wanted, but it’s only level one. So you’ve got to go back and make it fight the smaller guys in order for it to start beating up the bosses.” Chiaki explained. Hajime nodded, apparently understanding exactly what she was talking about. Nagito was just sitting there, a clueless smile painted onto his face, listening with full intention of agreeing anyway.

You...you think you got the gist...but what the hell is a Pokemon?

“(Y/n) is our precious shiny Pokemon, and we need to take them out to experience all of the experiences, in order to gain all of the experience!” Chiaki finally proclaimed, confidently puffing out her chest in pride. Nagito just chuckled, while clapping at Chiaki’s idea, praising her. Hajime tilted his head a bit, seeming to want to know the stickler details.

“So, what’s the best way to go about this?” Hajime stood up from his seated position on the floor, stretching out his arms, sounding out a couple of pops from his tense muscles. Chiaki went silent for a moment, but then quickly jumped up with an idea.

“We divide it into levels, and create our own scenarios to fit within what we want to focus on in each level. For example, level one can be about trying to trigger certain emotions, like happiness. (Y/n) will pass the level when she completes the task provided. This will keep her motivated, and we’ll all have fun! I think.” Chiaki proposed, walking over to your listening form. You were confused, but you were also willing to try anything for you to feel like everyone else.

“So, (Y/n), are you ok with this?” The pale pink haired girl crouched down to your level, head turning, waiting for your approval.

“I’ll do anything to feel again. Of course I’ll do it.” You blatantly said, raising your tone to puppet a sort of happy emotion, though this time, it didn’t really feel as forced as it usually was, which made your heart jump in surprise. Your heart hopping domino-affected to your eyes widening in shock, as well as a jerk of fear in your body. You didn’t really know what you felt, but you wanted to figure it out more than anything in the world at the moment.

“Perfect! So, ah, what do the arcade machines say again...oh! Level 1, Start! Or maybe I’m wrong…” Nagito, stood, looking in your direction, as if signaling to you that everything was going to go great.

LEVEL 1: EMOTION TRIGGERS

You were sitting in a chair, while being surrounded by the three friends of yours. It was kind of how it went just a few minutes ago, with each person trying to show you something that might trigger something in you, but this seemed like it was going to be just a bit more...difficult.

“Well, what we’ve got planned is in order for you to go onto the next level, you need to achieve the following three emotional responses: Happiness, Repugnance, and Sadness. We’ll help you out on trying to trigger them, so don’t worry about it too much, alright?” Chiaki lightly said. You always enjoyed her voice, as well as her understanding personality. It was probably those character traits of hers that caused her to be your friend, most likely.

“Ah, well repugnance should be easy since I’m here, after all! Poor (Y/n) here would probably hurl after staring at scum like me for too long!” Nagito said with a smile dancing on his face, stepping into your vision, standing there for you to scan your eyes upon him. Hajime and Chiaki didn’t really object, but just wanted to see what would happen out of their own curiosity.

You observed him from your seat, as he said to do. The longer you looked at him, the more he just looked even more pretty than you thought he looked in the first place. His body was abnormally slim, making you wonder if he gets a proper amount of nutrition. You also noticed upon observing his features that his face fits perfectly within the four-division rule, which basically proves his face to be perfectly symmetrical. You also got a warm, sort of bubbly feeling when you looked into his eyes. It almost seemed as if they glowed a light, neon green. It was so enchanting...so-

“Pretty.” You said deadenly aloud, making everyone in the room so completely wide-eyed at your words, er, word. It was a surprise to them, to say the least.

“Uh...huh?” Nagito sounded, the tips of his ears darkening in a slight blush, not really knowing what to say.

“Oh, apologies. I was just thinking about your pretty eyes. Oh, yes, sorry. I think your eyes are very nice. Also, did you know that your face fits perfectly into the four-division rule, which is very hard to find naturally. I think modeling agencies would really like your face, though you look underweight...do you eat on a regular basis? If not, I can recommend some meals that are high in protein and low in fat in order for you to gain a healthy amount of weight and-” You rambled about your findings about the man in front of you, causing the darkening hue to spread from Nagito’s ears to his cheeks. A snort of laughter could be heard from Hajime, while Chiaki snickered into her arm, trying to conceal the noise.

“Ah...ahahah..uh, HAJIME, YOU MENTIONED AN IDEA JUST A BIT AGO! WOULD YOU MIND PUTTING IT INTO ACTION FOR US PLEASE!?” Nagito blurted out unexpectedly, making his way over to the “sideline” where the two others resided.

“I don’t remember making any idea, Nag-” Hajime said, just wanting to tease the lucky boy around some more.

“SH-SHUT UP! JUST DO SOMETHING!” Nagito slapped Hajime’s shoulder in embarrassment, causing Hajime to laugh at his successful teasing attempt.

“Okay, okay, I did have one idea I wanted to try. Though, I might need (Y/n) to take off their school sweater. Just for a moment. You can put it back on if you’re uncomfortable without it.” Hajime walked over to your seat, and steadily waited for the removal of your sweater vest.

“Oh, I honestly don’t mind. I trust you, Hajime.” You simply stated, carefully slipping the school sweater vest off of your form, and lazily plopping it down on the ground adjacent to you. Hajime then stepped a bit closer, fiddling with the ends of his shirt a little, a light blush spreading across his cheeks.

“Sorry, but...d-do you mind closing your eyes?” Hajime quickly stuttered out. You nodded, fluttering your eyes shut in obedience.

You felt Hajime’s presence close in on you. Closer and closer his presence got, making you go just a tad ridged, until you felt something.

It was as if feathers started to dance on the dips of your hips, causing you to squirm from the feeling. You weren't sure what was happening at first, but the more the feeling continued, the more you felt as if a gigglish sound was about to burst from your lips.

“Uh, I’m close, but I need more hands. Can someone- Ah, thanks Chiaki…”

It was when the other pair of hands started to skip across your skin that your lungs exploded. A loud, joyous laughter rang through the room, raspy and unused. The hands just kept on going, making your laughing increase even more, to the point where tears pricked at the edges of your eyes, making you open them out of pure instinct.

It was a weird sight, but you weren't surprised; it was what made you laugh out in delight. Hajime and Chiaki were tickling your sides, making your laughter return to your emotional memory. You haven’t heard the sound of your own cries of happiness in such an incredibly long time, that you knew you didn’t recognize it from the decade or so that it had been buried and locked away deep inside you. 

But here you were, laughing with the people you charised the most in that moment.

….

The room was at a standstill. Everyone was extremely overjoyed at your new emotional upbringing of happiness. It was amazing, and almost a miracle on how much you laughed and smiled, making you seem like a totally different person. It was to be celebrated about later, but things weren't nearly finished yet. Two more emotions still needed to be freed from within you, and finding the key to giving your feelings wings was difficult at that.

“I know exactly what will make her cringe!” Chiaki shot up from her thinking position, running to her console that was stuffed into her school bag. She pulled out the glossy pink electronic, powering it on, while simultaneously walking towards you.

“I will force you to watch a sim of Teruteru take a shower and make him woohoo with a ghost, making him have a ghost baby.” Chiaki stuck the screen up to your staring eyes. It was on what seemed like a digital Teruteru in a house, who was walking into the restroom of his abode. Once you saw that the character took off his clothes to bathe, you knew the threat wasn’t a farce like you thought it would be.

You honestly didn’t feel like witnessing something so...unnecessarily eerie and gross at the same time.

“Ew...”

That was all you said, scrunching your nose, and turning your head away from the screen as fast as possible to avoid from seeing such a monstrosity take place.

“Wow, that was...surprisingly simple! Such talent from an ultimate such as yourself, Chiaki!” Nagito praised the girl who willingly soaked it up like a proud child after getting a lollipop of accomplishment from the doctors office. You giggled unconsciously, astonishing yourself from the gesture, but you smiled, knowing that things might just return to how they once were in the past sooner rather than later.

“But, uh, can you actually have a ghost baby in that game?” Nagito questioned, and rightfully so, because you were coincidentally wondering the same exact thing. Chiaki darefuly glared into Nagito’s pale irises, signaling that she was dead serious, honest to God. Wow...must be quite the odd game she must be playing…

….    

“Can’t we just...skip the sad one? We already got the other two down.” Hajime asked, not wanting to see you in a gloomy state, especially since the sight of seeing you so vulnerable might break his heart into two.

“No way, Hajime! Everyone needs to bawl their eyes out at least one time in their life, right? Despair’s tears are needed in order to live a balanced emotional life!” Nagito exclaimed, a slightly crazed look twirling within his eyes, reflecting his love for the subject at hand.

Nagito skipped over to your form, leaning close to your stature. An innocent smile was stitched onto his face, though it was quite obvious that he had completely ulterior motives. He was going to make you complete this level, no matter what he had to do.  

“Just imagine, dear (Y/n), that you were blackmailed into killing me. What would you do?” His voice vibrated deep within your consciousness. It was a strange question, but it didn’t fail to make you feel incredibly uneasy. You looked down into your lap, thinking about your answer, for your response could affect the possible outcome.

“Report the threat to the police.” You simply said, because it was the truth. Putting a situation into more capable hands was the most logical thing to do. Wasn’t it?

“Oh, but it’s blackmail, is it not? You might get killed if you do such a naive thing...let me change the question for you, just to make things easier…” Nagito’s hand drifted to lightly grasp your chin, raising it up to make stern eye contact. His nimble fingers held onto the bottom of your chin, gently squeezing your cheeks inward, puckering your lips.

“How would you kill me?” The darkness in his voice didn’t even try to be hidden, for it scared your heart into beating out of it’s chest even faster than it was before. What kind of question is that? Why would he ask something like this, and to you, especially?

“I don’t want to answer.” was the only thing you could push past your lips, which has started twitching at the thought of the question given. Nagito’s smile downcasted, the disappointment evident on his face. His grip on your face grew tighter, tighter as his nails dug a little into your delicate skin. His hold on your cheeks was like his way of wanting you to spit out every single detail of your answer, wanting to know so desperately how you would murder him. 

You never wanted to answer that question, for you would never think about it in the first place. Nagito was someone you treasured, along with Hajime and Chiaki. The thought of seeing their own blood spill made you want to hurl everything on the floor, with the burning residue of stomach acid sizzling away at your throat.

“Tell me.” Was all he said, with shivering silence following straight after.

“No.” Your voice cracked. This was viewed as a terrible situation to be in. Never in such a long time have you felt this emotionally trapped. You were clueless on what you were feeling, but you knew that you never wanted to feel it again. You wanted to drown it, hoping it dies beneath much better emotions that you’ve resurfaced. But it never went away, only increasing, taking over all of your senses.

“Nagito, I think that’s enou-”

“Shut it.” Nagito sharply turned his head to face Chiaki, who had objectified.

Who was this? Was this the Nagito you’ve always gotten to know?

“You look like the poisoning type, in all honesty. Maybe you would slip it into my drink, or maybe just force it down my throat, none of which are bad choices. Maybe you would stay to watch scum like me convulsing on the floor, vomiting blood and mucus. What a pathetic way to go, wouldn’t it? You would have to live with the burden of my soul hovering over you for the rest of your life, wishing for yourself to be dead as well...What do you think? I bet you can do better than tha-”

“N-NO! P-please stop!” You screamed out, wanting the vivid picture in your mind to burn within a hellscape, never to be seen again. Your form was hiccuping and shrugging in sobs, wanting the images to go away. Nagito was your friend, and the vision of him laying in his own liquids and-

WHAM

“What the hell are you doing, Nagito?” Hajime fist has made contact with Nagito’s face, causing the boy to stumble back from the impact, his hand detaching from your face, leaving little red marks from the indentation of Nagito’s nails grounding themselves into your cheeks.

You started to shiver and shake, your heart so full of disturbance and sadness that you honestly just felt like dying. You wanted to go back to anything, anything that could be better than this feeling, but no matter how hard you tried, everything just kept on elevating. It was like a never ending hustle of feelings reaching over the brim, spilling over while also breaking the vessel.

Chiaki rushed over to your side, hugging you with all of her gentleness and consideration, patting down your hair in the most comforting way she could. Hajime went over and did a similar gesture, holding your hand, while bringing it into himself to embrace it. You don’t really know why he did, but Hajime lightly kissed the knuckles on the top of your hand, then once again bringing it into himself. 

Nagito just stood there, dazed at the sight he was beholding. He really wasn’t sure what he did wrong, because he did what he was supposed to do, right? Yet, the heavy guilt building up within his stomach begged to differ.

He shuffled up lightly to your slightly shaking frame. He then dropped to his knees, a thump sounding from the action. Carefully, he laid his head in your lap, while tenderly placing his arms around your lower body. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry you had to see that…” Nagito pleaded, his mumbling apologies verberated lightly from his mouth. You didn’t know what came over you, but you unsteadily placed your hands in his hair, patting it like you would with a delicate puppy. After a few seconds, you could feel a sudden dampness on your legs, and you could only guess it was Nagito’s down regretful tears. 

“It’s...okay...you were trying to help. I understand, so everything is okay.” Was all you said.

The four of you all gathered in that position for a while, with some people switching around to give you the ultimate care and affection. The rest of the time together was used as a break from your emotional journey, with all of you guys gathering up on the couch to watch as many Star Wars movies you could possibly watch within a certain time frame.

….

LEVEL 2: HUMAN INTERACTION

The four of you were in a restaurant that was one of the most popular places in town. The menu was expansive and expensive, and the desserts were rumored to be on par with one of the best confectionery institutes in the country.

Chiaki had helped you to get dressed for the occasion beforehand, wanting you to learn the basics of dress code and why it’s placed into different areas. You learned that in places that excel in wealth, status, as well as being full of influential people, were usually required of a dress code. Fancy, one could call it, was usually the status quote. Though, if it wasn’t those things, then you could basically wear whatever you wanted to unless stated otherwise. Interesting….

“I’ll be paying the bill today, in case anyone is wondering.” Nagito said, shifting his suit a bit to fix the minor details. His hair was up in what seemed to be a half ponytail, with the rest of his wild hair flowing downwards as per usual.

“Well, yeah, you kinda are the only one that can pay for this kinda thing…” Hajime rang out, checking his watch from underneath his white dress shirt sleeves. You really liked how the shirt fit Hajime, for it accentuated his slightly muscular chest a little more, as well as his smaller waist being hugged by his black dress pants and belt.

Chiaki sat next to you, a pink dress hugging her curves perfectly. Not too tight to a point where it made her uncomfortable, but it still made her figure known, which was a cute, hourglass figure. It was too bad that she hid herself underneath her hoodie most of the time, she honestly deserves to flaunt it more often from your perspective, but you still respected her personal conservatism when it came to her own body.

“So...what do I do now? I know this has to do with my social development. I think. Right?” You questioned, wanting to know what you needed to do in order to improve, and hopefully lead you to be more bearable during social activities.

“We were thinking just simple things for now, like ordering for us, calling over for the check, asking for refills, and that stuff. You’ll have plenty of opportunities to do so, and we’ll correct you on anything when needed.” Chiaki quickly explained, with you nodding along, signaling that you were indeed listening to her. 

“If (Y/n) is going to take our orders and give them to the waiter...then I guess i’ll have to tell you what I would like. A six ounce filet mignon with a caesar salad, please and thank you, dearest.” Nagito carefully listed off his order. You didn't really expect him to be a fan of steak, but you record the information with ease.

“Lobster and a side of soup for me.” Hajime smiled.

“I’ll have the french onion soup then. No side, I’m saving room for dessert!” Chiaki eagerly bounced in her seat, seeming to be quite excited for the treats this establishment would offer.

“Got it, then I’ll order just that, along with my food as well.” You confirmed the list in your head, just to double check, and once the waiter came around for the order, you did what you needed to do with ease. You were getting better, and that made everyone at the table extremely proud of your progression into becoming a better you.

“I want (Y/n) to practice in drama talk, I think that would be funny.” Chiaki commented, giggling at the suggestion. You figured “Drama talk” was just the spreading or finding of interesting rumors. You didn’t know that Chiaki was into that kind of thing, but it was quite humorous all in the same. 

“Hm, interesting. Well, what kind of things have you seen around the school that could fuel into this conversation, (Y/n)?” Hajime asked, resting his head on his propped-up hands.

Interesting….you couldn’t really think of anything right off the bat. You looked back into your memories to see if there was anything that could be of interest...until you found it.

 “I think I saw Kazuichi and Sonia walk into a cafe two days ago.” You attempted to spark something interesting, and apparently it worked, because Chiaki went absolutely feral at your comment.

“No. Way. I don’t believe it, are you sure it was actually them!?” Chiaki hollered, eyes sparkling out of a childlike curiosity. 

“I’m almost positive, there’s only a few people I know that have pink hair, and another with blonde locks that reach to their ankles.” You confirmed, making even Hajime and Nagito’s attention draw into the topic. It seems as if they weren’t really expecting it either. It was funny how both of their eyes blew up all of a sudden, as if you said something completely ridiculous.

“Is it...really that unbelievable?” you asked, genuinely wanting an answer. You kind of were seeing it all along, though it was merely one sided at first, like, really one sided. Eventually you expected them to hook up somewhere in between.

“I don’t really know him very well since we don’t really share the same class but I’ve heard from Chiaki that he can be a bit…” Hajime tried to search for the words, as if he wanted to pick something out of the dictionary that is not as offensive as he wanted it to be.

“Hyperactive with a dash of a perverted young teen.” Nagito finished bluntly. He wasn’t wrong, but you believe that he could be a grown man...sometimes. 

Alright, maybe not as much as what was ideal, but still.

“Oh my god I still can’t believe this is happening…” Chiaki was sitting there, looking like she was a woman in her thirties experiencing her first midlife crisis. You figured you succeeded in the drama department...or maybe you had said too much.

….

The night ended off extremely profitable to your social skills, and to your stomach. You learned correct table mannerisms, as well as waiter manners and gestures from the three of your friends. Not to mention that you have never tasted anything more delightful than the multitude of desserts that Nagito had ordered for the table. Although he wanted to get the whole dessert menu, he knew that the proportions could probably not fit all on the table, so he just got what he believed to be the best five deserts. And let’s just say that you and Chiaki were having a ball with all of them, while Hajime and Nagito were sharing a lava cake with vanilla ice cream, in their own little conversation. 

You and Chiaki felt like you couldn’t walk, and truth be told, you two actually couldn’t. It was so funny that Nagito probably busted a lung, and Hajime chuckled profusely while helping the two of you hobble out of the restaurant with your full bellies.

All of you had an eventful sleepover after that, with all of you falling asleep on each other while watching the Home Alone series. All of you passed out after the first movie, because it was boring compared to the first one. Nothing could ever beat the first one.

Once everyone woke up the next morning, apparently Nagito had prepared another lesson for you, wanted everyone to join and participate, for this one was “Special” compared to the other ones.

You don’t really know how it happened, but now you were stuck on the couch of Nagito’s house, being lectured about a topic you honestly didn’t know that much. Well, other than the movie’s that you’ve watched about it.

LEVEL 3: ROMANCE

“I think we can all agree that (Y/n) here will definitely get asked out dozens of times throughout their lives, wouldn’t you say?” Nagito stated, as if it was an obvious fact that everyone in the world should know.

“I mean, yeah. I really wouldn’t be surprised if she got asked out a few times.” Hajime replied, trying his best to be as nonchalant as possible, though the light blush on his face was quite evident in that moment alone. You never got to see his face as flushed as it was very often. And it was amazingly amusing.

“Therefore, I propose we teach her the swooning basics! Romantic gestures, if you were to frame it that way.” Nagito spread his arms out, as  if he were a ruling king among a giant kingdom. 

You were a bit dumbfounded by the idea, purely because of the fact that Nagito, of all people, came up with this idea. You will admit that you were completely inept when it came to anything close to romance or love, but that doesn’t really mean that you weren’t open to trying to be in a relationship. Though, you don’t really know what to do if that circumstance ever were to pass.

“Wait, are you sure that they’ll even be comfortable with this? This is some intimate stuff we’re talking about.” Chiaki chimed in, proving a point. You have heard about some actions that only lovers do, and you honestly didn’t really want to practice them, based on the descriptions that those actions beheld.

“As long as it’s nothing overboard, I don’t see the harm.” You confirmed, wanting to let everyone know that you’re ready for probably one of your toughest challenges yet. Or not. Who knows?

“Wonderful! Now, where to start...suggestions, anyone?” Nagito looked into the mere three person crowd he had going on, pointing at a Hajime who had raised his hand. When did this suddenly become a classroom scenario?

“Well, we should probably think about what couples do, right? Like, I dunno, holding hands and hugging. Things like that, right?” Hajime indicated, listing off the activities with his fingers.

“Perfect! Well, you know what to do then…” Nagito went over to Hajime, nudging him a little bit towards you. He rolled his eyes in response, seeming to be tired of Nagito’s antics of teasing and prodding.

“I...guess I’ll try…” Hajime murmured, picking himself up from the couch, then plopping himself closer to you. You turned to look into his eyes, which had quickly darted away from your own, a spreading red blooming onto his cheeks.

“Well, I guess I’ll teach you how to, uh, hold hands first.” Hajime stated, nervousness evident in his voice. You could hear Chiaki giggle in amusement from her spot on the couch, along with a chortling Nagito, who was snickering through his toothy smile.

“Usually,” Hajime began, “Couples hold each other's hands like this.” He softly took your hand into his own, intertwining his fingers to fit the spaces inbetween yours like a perfect fit to a puzzle piece. It was cheesy to just think about it, but it honestly felt like it belonged there, and it made your chest begin to feel warm, resembling hot coals within a fireplace.

“People can do this basically whenever, like when they're walking together, laying down with each other, and some people even do it when they, uh, sleep with one another. But either way, it feels nice, doesn’t it?” Hajime inquired, lifting up your tangled-up fingers, smiling kindly. The whole thing was so incredibly comforting and sweet, making you face unconsciously heat up. You’ve only blushed a few times in your life, and half of those times you had no clue you were even blushing, but now, you were pretty damn sure your face was as red as a freshly picked strawberry. 

“‘Oh, yeah. You can also do this, I think this is kinda a common thing too.” Hajime then undid the bond of the two hands, gently putting his own hand underneath yours. With his thumb, he dragged it back and forth across the top of your hand, making your heart leap from the gesture.

“Woah, Hajime, you really know your stuff, don’t you?” Chiaki pestered, giggling herself into even higher spirits. Hajime huffed out in an embarrassed annoyance. Can he just...have this moment for a god forsaken minute?

“Can...can I try?” You suddenly spoke, causing Hajime the look up in attentive stature. He let go of your hand, but still left it pretty close to your dominant one.

“Of course, you’re the student here, after all. So, go ahead.” Hajime then offered his hand, leaving it suspended in the air, waiting for you to reciprocate.

You nervously approved his hand with yours, your heart beating so hard up against the inside of your chest, that you were partially convinced that it was begging for an escape. You then shakily intertwined your fingers, causing Hajime to reciprocate your hold. Your hand was probably clammy from all of your apprehension, but Hajime looked pleased with what you had achieved.

“Look at that, all by yourself, huh? Look at you go.” Hajime chuckled, playfully gripping tighter onto your hand, then started to shake it around lightly, making you laugh a little from the gesture.

It was strange, but you really wanted to know what it was like to hold Nagito and Chiaki’s hands as well...maybe it was just your brain’s curiosity kicking in, or maybe it was the yearning that your heart was reaching out for. You didn’t know, so you let the feeling flourish, letting it be.

….

“And how in the world is Nagito good at anything romantic again?” Hajime exclaimed, making Nagito mock offence from the comment, then wickedly laughed it off. Chiaki shrugged her shoulders, rolling her eyes a bit, wanting her point to be shown through.

“You can’t deny that he’s pretty creative when it comes to names.” Chiaki explained, “He’s probably the most qualified person here if we’re going to teach them about pet names.” She turned her head to the lucky boy in question, who was playing with one of his bottom curls with his index finger, twirling it around, then releasing it in a transfixing way.

“Hm? Oh, well if I could be of some use...then of course I’ll do it for our little sunflower!” Nagito seemed to brighten the room a few levels of hues with merely his speech alone.

“Ok, well I see what you mean now…” Hajime mumbled into Chiaki’s ear, causing her to puff up in pride.

Nagito seated himself next to you, making himself comfortable. He gestured for you to do the same, wanting for you to be relaxed while he did his wordy magic.

“I’m honestly not the best for something like this, with me being a piece of lonely trash and all, but I’ll try to introduce you to some ‘Pet Names’ your future lover might bestow upon you. Better yet, you could use these to give to your lover yourself, which is also a fine option.” Nagito seemed to fully lean his weight onto the couch, closing his eyelids, and sighing out in a relaxed bliss.

“Hmmm...a common one is baby, babydoll, or even the bland bae are all some simple ones. They’re calling you cute, like a giddy child, but personally those are quite the lazy names, in my opinion…” Nagito chuckled.

 So...getting basically called a kid by your lover means that they think you're cute? That confused you...because you didn’t really like the idea of you being compared to a child on the cuteness spectrum. It seemed wrong...but you got why others would enjoy it.

“These one’s I enjoy more, they’re all based on sweet foods, indicating you’re, well, sweet. Or maybe just scrumptious in your own way...Anyway, people can say honey, cupcake, buttercup, and probably a lot more.” His hands started to sway around him, aiding him in his explanation.

You could call someone a sweet-tasting food and they’ll be flustered from the complement? That sounds simple enough.

“Ah, we still have so much more, I could go on forever…” Nagito exhaled, smiling, seeming to be experiencing a lot of inner peace in that moment.

“No, please continue. This is interesting to me, and I’m also learning a lot!” You proclaimed, curious for more. Nagito just snickered, moving on with his long list of names.

“People sometimes like to nickname after animals. The ones that are known to be small or cute, like bunny, bambi, kitten, and my personal favorite, dove. So pretty, is it not? Naming your lover after the bird that represents inner peace, and the bringer of love…”

You nodded and hummed in agreement, even though he couldn’t see you with his eyes closed. The fact that humans named other humans based off of animals for the sake of endearment made sense, but you hoped it didn’t get too extreme, or was used in offensive language... 

“What one’s do you like the most?” You asked, to Nagito’s surprise. He had to stop and think for a moment, as if he was about to prepare himself what he was about to say.

“I’m...picky. I like names that are meaningful, yet roll off the tongue just right. Though, I also want my partner to be comfortable with the name as well. It’s hard to pinpoint a single one but...maybe it would have to be between love, or precious. They’re simple...but for some reason it makes my heart feel warm.” Nagito put his hand to his chest, humming in satisfaction from his own touch.

“Hmmm….I think if I wanted to give you a pet name Nagito, I think it would be…” You sat in thought, furrowing your brows to think of something endearing your can say to the hopeless romantic.

“Ah, now there’s no need for tha-”

“Flower.”

“Huh?” Nagito opened his eyes to look at you, staring into your thoughtful orbs.

“Like a dandelion, because when you blow on it to make a wish, then it comes true. So I think it matches well.” You tried to break down your reasoning, but it just left Nagito more confused, and not to mention more flustered.

“I...don’t really seem to understand really.” Nagito shifted around on the couch as a sort of a nervous tick. It was obvious to even you that the way his eyes flickered around like someone in a frantic state indicated much apprehension.

“It’s because you're the flower that made my wishes come true.” You stated, smiling at the boy who started to radiate steam from his ears, seemingly not able to take anymore of the emotional turmoil.

In the end, Hinata had to lay him down on the couch for a while, while Chiaki pulled out a bag of frozen peas to place on Nagito’s burning cheeks, who was mumbling something along the lines of “I’m so lucky…” like a crazy mantra.

You just watched it all go down, while also using the term “Flower” in sentences out loud, honestly not helping with Nagito’s heart, which was out of control.  

….

“So...I have to teach you how to cuddle, right? Well that’s easy. Boys, get off this couch. It’s cuddle time. ” Chiaki blatantly said, though she did keep that pretty smile on her face at all times. Your knowledge on cuddling was limited, but you did it a couple times as a whole group, so that counts...probably.

“Lay down so we can get started, okay?” Chiaki gently said, laying herself down on the couch, opening her arms to you, inviting you into her seemingly warm embrace. You eminently fell into her arms, your head nuzzling unintentionally into her chest. She giggled at your actions, obviously enjoying herself. 

Hajime and Nagito, not really knowing what to do, just sat down together in a large cushioned recliner, the both of them leaning back into the chair, bodies pressed up against each other. Nagito had grabbed a book beforehand, so he took this time to simply enjoy his novel. Hajime, being curious and bored, kept on bugging Nagito with questions about the book, which Nagito honestly didn’t mind him doing.

“Ok, let’s start with the common stuff, little spoon or big spoon?” Chiaki said, holding up the number two on her fingers to indicate the options that she had just listed. You had no idea what she had just ment. Spoons? Like, soup spoons? Or ice cream spoons? Your mind was rushing with questions, and Chiaki snickered lightly from your inquisitive irises, knowing how perplexed she had made you.

“Sorry, you’re probably confused, so I’ll just show you.” She shifted herself so that she was facing away from you, so that all you could see was her back. She then wiggled closer to you from that angle, so that her spine was pushed up lightly against your chest. You just laid there, rigid in not knowing what to do with your arms, which were tense from Chiaki’s actions. 

“Wrap your arms around me. Don’t be shy, I’ll tell you if you’re doing something wrong.” She said, waiting for your embrace to bestow itself around her.

Humming in agreement, you used your arms to comfortably wrap itself around Chiaki’s dipped waist, instinctively pulling her closer to you. The pink-haired girl had mumbled from the movement, but then stuck up a little thumbs up to you, indicating that you did everything perfectly.

The two of you stayed in that position for a while, getting comfy from each other's radiating warmth. It was something so peaceful, that it filled your heart with an unknown bliss. You wanted to stay like this forever, but you knowing that it had to end eventually made you feel just a bit of disappointment.

“M’kay..les’ do another one.” She finally spoke, sleepiness obvious within her voice, making you smile a bit. She turned over to you, then started to shove your shoulder lightly with her palm.

“Go on your back…I’m gonna lay on you.” She murmured, pushing you down on your back, and shifting her form onto your chest. Her head was snuggled into your neck, while her arm lazily laid on your abdomen. What surprised you about the position is the fact that Chiaki’s leg had tossed itself over to drape over your lower body. It was as if she was just a baby, clingy koala who wanted their nap time to begin already...actually, this was exactly that, Chiaki was definitely a cute, sleepy koala who just wanted to snooze.

“This is the sweetheart’s cradle...you make a good pillow…” Chiaki mumbled into your neck, making the area feel hot from how flustered you were. Yet, it was so incredibly soothing, that you just wanted to just...rest here until the day you died. You weren't even exaggerating either, because if you were to die like this, you definitely would be the happiest person on earth, and definitely the most snug corpse out there by a longshot.

“Can...can the other’s join too?” You managed to mutter, causing Chiaki to slightly stick her head up.

“Mhm...you’re lucky this couch is big…” she answered, then turned her head to the two boys, who were bickering about the protagonist from Nagito’s book.

“(Y/n) wants you guys to join, come on...don’t keep me and them cold and waiting.”

From that point forward, nothing could compare from the warmth of all three of the people that meant the most to you. The warmth of family...the warmth of true friends...and the warmth of love, all sang such a bright song in your heart, helping you to finally find yourself again. The hardened plaster covering your emotional bank had cracked, leaving the feelings to leak free for the first time in a decade.

And with that layer of facade broken by the people you grew to love the most, you couldn't have wanted it any other way. It would always be them to break down your walls. It would always be them that lead you down the path to find the you you’ve always been searching for. And it would always be them that provided you with the love that you’ve missed out on in life. 

[sapphic-sasuke]

Wanna Know a Writer

Tagged by @dualfuel (thank you for tagging me!!)

How many works do you have on AO3?

So far, only two—but I have a lot of WIPs I plan to release.

What is your total word count for AO3?

86,830 words.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Hmm so I’ve written for the MCU once two years ago. I had a Wangxian fic written once that I never finished haha. Also a few Kiribaku oneshots around three years ago. I actually took a break from writing for two years because I lost my passion for it and returned to it last year November. Now, I only write for Naruto. And i guess the tone of my stories have changed a lot too? I used to like focusing more on relationships (not only romantic, just relationships in general). Now I like to focus on the dynamics, character motivations and how the setting influences them.

Do you respond to comments, why/why not?

I do respond to comments, sometimes it takes me a while to reply but I always make sure to respond to comments even if it’s a short comment like “I really love this” or a simple <3. I want to showcase my appreciation for my readers taking the time out of their day to comment on my story. So if someone sends me a really long comment, I’ll send an equally long comment back hahaha I find it fun.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Definitely forgottten melodies. I give the story quite an open ending however it’s implied that Sasuke’s struggles aren’t over yet. It’s mostly the sense of loneliness? He’s truly alone, he’s at the very lowest point in his life but he knows he can’t give up now; so he keeps fighting, keeps trying to bring justice to his family no matter how tired and devastated he feels.

Do you write crossovers?

No but I love to read them. I think crossovers require a certain amount of creativity that I just... don’t possess.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No actually. I know it’s a possibility but I don’t think the hate would demotivate me much as well.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge no. I don’t think my stories are well known enough for that to even happen haha

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, I’d love that though.

Whats your all time favourite ship?

No idea. If you asked me this two years I’d immediately have an answer ready but honestly? I’ve lost most of my interest in ships.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I have loads of fic ideas. Not actual abandoned WIPs. I don’t ever properly start something I think I won’t finish. If I try hard enough, or even if I scrap the idea and start from scratch, I’ll get it finished. Personally, it’s a waste of time, especially when I already have a long project I’m devoting most of my writing time to. And I hate wasting my time since I’m so bad at managing it haha.

What are your writing strengths?

I’m told that my readers enjoy the character’s inner perspective, seeing their thoughts and motivations so clearly. So I think a strength of mine is crafting the inner mind of my character properly. Especially for a character like Sasuke who often internalises his thoughts. My description has also improved a lot recently. Which I’m very proud of because it used to be quite a weakness of mine.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Definitely the pacing. It’s something I’m working on and hoping has improved but pacing was an issue. And also time management. I’m only able to write a lot when I force myself to, it’s very bad. I have no writing schedule.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fics?

It’s okay. I personally would never do it. Sometimes it’s nice to see. But it can also be annoying when there’s no translation even in the notes. Like I’ll have to go on google translate to find out what the character was saying and sometimes google translate is very bad. It’s nothing I’m against though.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Ahahaha this is so embarrassing. I was 12 and I wrote a taehyung x reader fic. Honest to god I don’t even remember the plot of the fic. I just knew it was called “deception” and I thought that was a cool word. It was on wattpad and it got ... like 100 reads so 🔥 I think I remember somebody was analysing my fic and just criticising it heavily saying my plot doesn’t make sense and I remember feeling annoyed like ??? leave me alone I’m just having fun☹️

If you wanna know the first ever fanfiction I read.. I was 10 and it was a sasuke x reader fic on quotev called “tutor me” where sasuke was the popular guy in high school and reader was nerdy and getting bullied. I loved that shit. I remember he used to eat tomatoes raw in that fic. Sasuke is so hardcore.

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

I’m satisfied most with forgotten melodies as looking for forgiveness is a work in progress. I don’t have a favourite. I love them all the same.

[purplepirate123]

Why One or Two Typos Don’t Matter (Much)

Well, today was an embarrassing day to be on the internet.

I’m sure you’ve had those, too – maybe you picked a fight or posted something you shouldn’t have, or misread a tweet and ended up setting a friend off on a tirade when you thought you were making a simple joke.

It happens.

Just like when we were all wondering around The Real World breathing on each other, we have good social days and… not so good social days.

But of course, the problem with the internet is that when you screw up, people can hold it against you FOREVER.

How many times have *certain dumb-ass politicians* tweeted something they shouldn’t have only to delete it for PR reasons, but it ended up not mattering because enough vengeful souls took screenshots of the post and ensured to keep *certain dumb-ass politician’s* failures circling the internet for days if not weeks to come?

As a writer, I can’t help but dream of becoming at least a little famous off my books, but if I did I think I’d have to pull a Sarah J. Maas and get off social media COMPLETELY in order to avoid those lovely foot-and-mouth situations that only look worse the more famous you are.

It’s the smart move, honestly. We’re all human, and we’re all bound to make mistakes – it depends on who we are and what mistakes we’ve made that determine whether or not we can be forgiven.

But I digress. Here’s what happened:

So I’m starting up this whole *freelance editing business*, right? Even though my LAST experience with freelance writing was… well, not a complete disaster, but certainly not something I want to re-live? (I’ll give you the short version: hours/days of work for like $15, if that).

But here’s why I decided to give editing a try: I get to talk to other authors and writers about cool books and stories, and then help those authors and writers make those already cool stories even cooler because I’ve been doing this for nearly 20 years and I’ve learned a thing or two about how to tell a good story.

Sounds a lot more fun than writing scripts for real-estate podcasts that hardly anyone will ever listen to, right?

Yeah. I thought so, too.

One of the things I offer (the first “tier,” if you will) is proof reading. Yes, that means turning the spell-check-o-meter on high and nit-picking sentences (something I loath doing in my own work) and copy/pasting words into Google dictionary to double check their meaning and spelling.

But the hope is that this level of nitting and picking leads to other forms of writing help that I love giving, like working on the actual meat and potatoes of a story in order to improve it overall which, in my most humble opinion, is really what matters.

And to market (which all good little creatives have to do if you even want a CHANCE to survive in our content-saturated world) this new thing, I took to Twitter to advertise these “first tier” editing services; what they entail, how much they cost, etc.

How else are people to know what I’m doing, after all?

And today, like the good little creative millennial I am, I re-tweeted my own tweet in order to boost awareness of this little business I’m trying to make.

Don’t JUDGE me; we’ve all done it, Carol.

Now, I have a little friend group on Twitter who’ve been loyally, loving retweeting and liking these posts in an effort to help give them a boost in Twitter’s savage algorithm, and I’d already commented once on this said tweet to laugh at myself for one mistake I made in the initial tweet: I put the cent sign in the wrong place next to an amount.

Jeez, it’s so weird how we talk about communication on the computer as much as we do. Can we pause and just think about that for a second?

But you know what else I screwed up? You know what else my dyslexic brain and skimming eyes missed?

I’d misspelled the word “grammar.”

Put and “e” where the second “a” should be.

My phone didn’t even pick it up because it’s probably something I do all the time (because let’s be real, phone keyboards and spellcheck < laptop and computer keyboards and spellcheck).

And do ya wanna know how I realized I’d made this mistake? A new follower of mine commented, “I wouldn’t have Rebecca do anything, she checks GRAMMER.”

Petty bitch almost made me cry while I was at my day job.

I admit I tried to play it cool, thanking her for pointing that out when several other people hadn’t, laughing about how this proves my point: no matter how good a writer you might be, it’s still a good idea to have another person NOT inside your head look over your work before you put it out in the world.

Aaaaand then I blocked her and deleted the whole thing. The thread, the comment – all of it.

Aaaaand had a nervous break down.

Because who in the world would want to pay an editor who makes a typo in a tweet advertising their own editing services?

The answer?

People who want/need editors.

Because here’s the funny thing about writing good shit: one or two typos don’t matter.

I see them all the time, even in traditionally published books. For some people it drives them up the wall, but these people are usually editors themselves, or agents or writers or teachers or someone who’s way way way WAY more involved in the book world than the average everyday reader.

I’ll say it again, for you, for me, for those editors and agents and teachers and writers and librarians out there:

A handful of typos scattered throughout a 100k book don’t f*cking matter.

I got all upset (and am still, honestly, a little upset) because this woman made me feel inferior over mistake in a made-up system of communication that we as a society just so happen to all agree to see as Truth.

Reader, I know what you’re thinking: “But if spelling and grammar don’t matter, when what does?”

The answer?

Or, at least, my answer:

The point, the content, the meaning – these are the things that matter in a story.

Now, you can’t submit a manuscript made up solely of little red lines and expect it to get picked up right away, (the exception being if you’re writing a fantasy or science fiction story with a LOT of made up names and places and words, and in which case I recommend that you add those all to your word processor’s dictionary so that YOU don’t accidentally miss-spell the name of your own kingdom or main character on page 2 of the first chapter) so do at least one or two read-throughs to make sure your typos aren’t so frequent as to mess up the flow of the narrative you’re attempting to convey.

But to be honest? One or two little things that your tired eyes miss after you’ve re-read 100, 200, 300 page story for the 18th time?

Yeah.

They don’t matter.

Odds are they’ll get caught and changed by an editor or agent or whoever. But they also might not. No big deal either way.

What matters is that your main character has a solid, believable, emotionally riveting arc.

What matters is that we can smell the smoke on the battlefield, hear the cries of dying men and monsters, feel the heat from the fire raging where the castle once stood.

What matters are the worlds you imagine in galaxies far, far away; how new species and races and cultures question and reflect our own.

What matters is how the first page hooks your reader to the point where they won’t stop turning the rest until they get to the last, and then rush to their phones to see if you’ve announced you’re going to be writing more in the series.

Don’t get me wrong, these are hard things to achieve. Even I can’t promise you your book will have that kind of affect on every person who reads it.

But if you write a solid story, then guess what?

Your chances of that happening improve. Drastically.

~~

So yeah, lady – I miss-spelled “grammar” when trying to sell my editing services. Made me look like a temporary idiot to an imaginary audience.

But do you have a BA from a top Liberal Arts school, 36 credits of a Master’s Degree, three books and a dozen short stories under your belt?

Yeah.

Didn’t think so.

Also, it’s fucking Twitter. Get OVER yourself.

So writers, take comfort: One or two typos in your life, your book, your tweets don’t matter.

But what you’re saying?

How you’re saying it?

That’s gold.

~~

(And if you ARE the type of person who worries about the one or two typos? All the more reason to hire an editor to be your fresh pair of eyes. Because, let’s face it – it helps. My rates are on the Welcome page of this website if you’re interested. )

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #341

“anger, misery, you’ll suffer unto me”

Would you risk your life to save a total stranger? I don't think so. Have you ever trashed your ex’s car after an argument? No, and I never would. Grow up. Have you ever done something because of peer pressure you are ashamed of? I don't believe so, no. Have you ever been embarrassed to introduce your parents to anyone? No. Would you leave a note on a car claiming responsibility if you damaged it? Yeah; guilt would eat me alive otherwise. Have you ever used someone's handicapped parking pass to get a parking spot? Fucking ew, no. Have you ever held back a well-deserved compliment because you were jealous? No. Do you guilt people into giving you what you want? Ugh, no. Would most people consider you better than average looking? Ha, no. For yourself, would you rather have a perfect body or high IQ? Give me the perfect body, living in my horrible one has affected my mental health badly enough. I'm fine with having a moderate IQ. I just want to feel happy in my own skin. Have you ever embarrassed some intentionally in public? Wow, no. Have you ever used a false ID? Also no. Are you embarrassed to tell people your job? I'm embarrassed to tell people I don't HAVE a job. Do you remember the first conversation you had with the person you have feelings for? I don't. I'm sure it was RP-related and not friendly, but I don't remember the exact convo. Have you ever got a D or F on your report card? I want to say no; I think the lowest I ever got was a C. If you had twins, would you give them rhyming names? Ugh, no. I'm sorry if you're into it, but I'm just not. I would want to ensure they knew their uniqueness and individuality was seen. Is there anyone that you wish was IN your life who used to be? There's a large number of those kinds of people. What brings out the worst in you? Probably when I'm building up towards a PTSD meltdown. I get VERY short and snappy and am convinced everyone hates and wants to leave me. My mouth also has NO fucking leash, and I know I can say very mean things that I'll regret later. What do you prefer, Skittles or Starbursts? Skittles. Mike & Ikes or Jolly Ranchers? Jolly Ranchers for sure. What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter? Waffles (with syrup). Don't knock it 'til you try it, I'm telling you. What are some wild animals commonly found where you live? Besides birds obviously, there's squirrels, deer, opossums, raccoons... Have you ever had a lucid dream? I think I've had just one. What's your biggest problem at the moment? Probably my anxiety having stunted my growth in so many areas. Have you ever turned down a job offer? I don't think so, no. What's the longest hospital stay you've had? For what? I think my longest was almost two months for suicidal thoughts. Two months might sound long, but it was like... my third or so psych hospital stay for that same reason. What's something really basic that you're terrible at? Even the most simple math. I don't even know the majority of my elementary multiplication tables. Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute? Yeah. Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? I have one there already, but I plan on getting it covered because it was an impulse tattoo that I feel no connection towards. Have you ever searched for your house on Google Earth? My old house, yeah. Are you a beach, country, or city person? Country. Living in the suburbs has definitely reminded me of that... Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? Typing, by a long shot. I make typos texting too much. Have you ever kissed anybody who had a mustache? Yeah. Who is the last person that you said "I love you" to, besides family members? Sara. When was your first real relationship? Sophomore year of high school to early college. Have you ever cried over an ex? I've cried the entire mass of water on Earth over an ex lmao. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes. Is there something really bad that you’ve done, that only YOU know about? No. Have you ever copied someone else’s homework? I think I have once or twice, but obviously with consent. What’s a hobby you would like to try out? If my legs worked like actual legs and I didn't sweat like an absolute pig, I would like to try out herping, but without actually interacting with the animal like picking it up and scaring the daylights out of it. I'd just be happy enough looking for reptiles, amphibians, and inverts to photograph instead. Does that still even count as herping? What was the last event you attended? My youngest niece's birthday party. How about the last event you organized? I've never organized an event. What’s something you get excited about doing and want to do it right away? Whenever I take nature pictures, I'm immediately keen to get them into Lightroom and do the postproduction. Is there anything you feel you’re better at than anybody else? Definitely not. What’s the biggest insect you’ve ever seen? If you exclude places like the zoo, that would probably be a rhinoceros beetle or something. Oh no, actually some kind of local moth I don't know the name of. They're beautiful big white boiz. How about the biggest spider? I might be mis-remembering, but I believe at a reptile convention I went to with Sara, one of the vendors had a goliath bird eater tarantula in one of the cups. I do know it was some tarantula species for sure, though. Who was the first person to break your heart? My dad. Obviously not romantically, but him just splitting on the family with no proper communication absolutely broke my heart for years. First person to give you flowers or candy on Valentine’s day? I'm sure that would be my parents. If you exclude them 'cuz that's kinda obvious, I believe it was Aaron, my first boyfriend. I'm pretty sure we were together on Valentine's Day, because I remember getting him a giant Hershey's Kiss. First band you obsessed about? I wasn't truly obsessed with any band 'til Ozzy in middle school. Can you do a backflip? No; I've never tried and never will. I was and still am too afraid of breaking my neck. Like I have a MASSIVE fear of paralysis, particularly from the neck down; that fear is actually the biggest one that keeps me from driving, fun fact. Are you an optimist or a pessimist? Of the two, definitely a pessimist, but I at least think I align most with being a realist. What’s the biggest lie you’ve told someone? I'm unsure. Have you ever been hit on by someone of the same sex? Yeah. How many doors are in the room you’re in? Just one. Have you ever been engaged and broke it off? No. Has anyone ever drawn a picture of you? Tyler once drew a picture of him and me. It was cute. That guy still dove in WAY too fast. Have you ever dated a redhead? I haven't, but I love redheads. Natural red hair is just gorgeous. What are your thoughts on facial hair on guys? Historically, I seem to generally like some, but it really depends on the guy's general appearance. I can like none at all or a full beard and mustache, it doesn't really matter to me. Did you go anywhere today? No; my mom is in Florida with her brothers totally cleaning out Grammy's house, so she's not here to take me anywhere. Do you have any nieces or nephews? Oh yikes, I have a lot. I honestly can't count because I've lost track of how many boys and girls Katie has. You have a choice to shoot your father or die, what would you do? Jesus. I'd rather die; some things just aren't worth living after, and I'd have no desire to keep going if I killed my father. Did you ever cry at the end of King Kong? I've never watched it, actually, but I. LOVED. The video game. I haven't played it in years and only faintly remember how it ends, but I don't remember crying. Are you in any amount of pain at the moment? Quite a lot, actually. It's kinda a TMI subject so I won't delve into it, just know I'm hurting like a bitch. What was the last sugary thing you ate? I snacked on some chocolate chips earlier today... which I really shouldn't have done, but I think I had reasonable restraint and didn't totally binge. When was the last time you did something extremely stupid? Who knows, that's not a rare occurrence, it feels like. Have you been to any parties lately? Only my niece's bday party in February. Thankfully it was kept pretty small, given Covid; not that anyone in that family besides my sister gives a flying fuck about precautions, though... Can you touch your pinky to your thumb around your wrist? Ugh, no. Close, but not enough. I still have thin wrists and hands, but yeah, yay for being overweight. If you were to start a charity, what would you call it? I'd hve to put more thought than I'm willing for one survey question. I'd have to decide what KIND of charity I want to start first, which I'm unsure of. Probably something related to animal wellfare and conservation or something similar to the Trevor Project. Maybe LBGTQ+ youth disowned by their families... I dunno. There's so much good I wish I could do. Are you comfortable with your body? Holy fuck no. It's only gotten worse since I started gaining weight again and almost entirely erased all weight loss progress I'd made. What is your recent inside joke? Most recently made? Idk, man. I don't make those often. Would you rather be a human, vampire, or a werewolf? Er, I'm good with being a human. If I was a vampire or werewolf, I wouldn't exactly be very welcomed, I'm sure, and both have seemingly painful traits to cope with. Are you good at giving directions? It is absolutely impossible for me. I have NO sense of direction, like, at all. I don't know highway names, local exits, etc. etc. etc. etc. Why did you last curse? Pain when readjusting myself due to aforementioned issue I'm having. What is your purpose in life? I hope it involves animals and spreading words of peace and an appreciation for art. What is one of your weak points? I'm very, very, very dependent on others. I'm really working on trying to correct that. I can barely do shit on my own as is. Who was the last person you heard snoring? My cat, haha. Would you rather shower by yourself or with another person? 100% by myself. Another person would just get in the way and make me VERY self-conscious of my body, even if it was my romantic partner. Just please leave me alone to hate myself for 10 minutes. :^) What was your last addiction? You could say my current one is John Wolfe, a really funny let's player I've gotten into. Been bingeing some of my favorite games he has playlists of for a few weeks now. You are in a tank full of spiders, what do you do? Well one, I'd like to know what kind they are. Venomous? Harmless? You gotta give me the details. If I don't have any, then I'm admittedly freaking the fuck out, even though I know I should stay very calm when trying to get out. Fear would win, though. If killing yourself meant saving the world, would you? Saving the world from what? But odds are, yeah. I don't cherish my pretty damn mediocre life more than I do the lives of what, 8 billion people? Have you ever stayed up all night just to talk to someone? Yeah. When was the last time you eavesdropped someone? I kinda do that sometimes when Mom's on the phone and I can hear her from my room, and if they're on speaker. Particularly if the subject is me. When was the last time you went to a club? I've never been to one. How have you been sleeping? Poorly. Are you adopted? No, I'm not. Do you like scrapbooking? Not really, no. Do you collect anything valuable? "Valuable to me." <<<< This. Nothing of great monetary worth, though. Have you ever been beaten up? No, thankfully. Do you know anyone with an eating disorder? I don't think so, in my personal life. What was the last thing you killed? An ant. Have you ever used someone for money? I never could, no. When was the last time you went to the zoo? Sigh, it's been many many years. I'm so ready to get my goddamn legs back in shape so I can go again, this time with a REAL camera, too. Last time I went was when I still only had a Kodak EasyShare; I have a professional Canon camera now with much more education on photography too, so I would be in absolute heaven with at least twenty memory cards in need, haha. Maybe next fall... Is there a teacher you hate more than anything? I actually never had a teacher I hated in my entire school career. It really, really is as simple as just being a respectful student. In most cases, I should emphasize, because I do understand some educators just suck. Now I had some teachers I wasn't very fond of, but most certainly none that I hated. Do you own colored eyeliner? No. Do you have manners? I honestly think I'm very mannerly. When was the last time that you had a pet that died? We last had to put my dog Teddy down; he had cancer and was literally withering away. I knew in my very core that even if we didn't bring him to the vet to euthanize him, he would've died naturally in a very short period of time; I doubt he would've survived another night. Now I'd like to move on. What is your favorite medication that you take, and why? The combination of Vraylar and Lamictal is the reason I'm alive. It keeps my bipolarity and depression under control. Do you decorate Mason jars? No, but those are some of my favorite crafts visually. They're very pretty and cute. Can you see the mountains from where you live? Oh hunny, I wish. Did you ever play pranks on April Fool’s Day? As a kid, yeah. I don't anymore. I'm not really even a fan of April Fool's Day as an adult because of how cruel some jokes assholes play are. Which instrument would you play if you could learn to play one? Maybe violin. Do you part your hair on the left side, right side, or in the middle? The left. What are some names you like that start with the first letter of your name? Uhhhh Bianca, Braelynn (look I know it's so stereotypically Southern but it's pretty)... and idk from there, those are the two that come to mind first.

[ohwereusingourmadeupnames]

Just Crash, It’s Our Time Now 

Pairing: Peter Parker/Tony Stark  Notes: I’m here for all the au’s, y’all. Warnings: there’s a little handjob action, but not much else.  Word Count: ~12k Summary: 

Peter Parker is a med school student with very little time on his hands. He’s set up on a blind date by Nat and it’s fucking awful. Good thing he caught eyes with the cute bartender who’s quick on his feet and steps in when Peter need s it the most. 

Doctor!Peter, Bartender&Teacher!Tony 

There is lots of cuteness & some dodgeball action - hope you enjoy! 

Read it on AO3 here - 

“Hey dude, get the fuck out of the way!”

Peter took a step to the right just in time – the bike rushing by barely missing him. Pulling his AirPod from his ear, he blinked a few times to reorient himself. It was his own fault; he knew listening to his textbook on the way back to his apartment wasn’t the safest option. Especially in a place like New York. Despite being there for almost four years, Peter wasn’t anywhere close to being used to how fast everything moved.

His little hometown in Colorado didn’t have near the amount of people running by him, let alone the pace of the never sleeping city.

The reading expectations in his Clinical Oncology class didn’t seem to be possible – there were 5 chapters to cover before the next cohort meeting in a couple of days. Between his last ever class of medical school and the rotation that went with it, there wasn’t too much time for anything else.

Luckily, Peter’s plan for the rest of the night consisted of sitting on his couch, eating way too much food, and finishing his readings – the time truly bound to be incredibly magical. Regardless – this was the life Peter chose for himself. It was way too late in the game to find himself too bored with it all to actually get to the finish line. He’d put a lot of his life on hold to make sure he succeeded in the goals he set out for himself all that time ago.

There were people his age settling down and having families, enjoying the best time of their lives. Peter tried not to feel jealous, he really did. He loved where his life was headed and couldn’t imagine doing anything else – yet, he wanted other things, too. Simple things like warmth, a person to call his own, hell – a man to share his bed with on a consistent occasion.

Maybe one day.

The rest of the walk went quickly – Peter now on his toes, keeping himself completely in the moment. He escaped tragedy once – the probability of missing it again not nearly as high. His rotation in the ER proved that random accidents and pedestrian collisions were some of the main issues in the city – he treated enough road rash to know. Brushing the thought aside, Peter felt a breath of relief leave his lungs – his apartment finally in sight.

Stopping at the door, Peter keyed in the code to get into his building, grabbed his mail, and trudged up to his fifth-floor apartment. The key sliding into the lock brought a smile to his face and kicking off his shoes when he finally got the door open – that was the best feeling of the day.

Luxury did not last long – less than a minute later, there was a knock on the door. There were only four people in the world who knew the entry code to get into his building – and he wondered briefly which one of them it could be. Sighing, Peter dropped his backpack and shrugged out of his hoodie before even thinking about answering the door. Truthfully, he wanted to retreat into his room to strip out of the scrubs he’d been in for more hours than he cared to admit – but he couldn’t, not when one of his friends was out there waiting for him. Peter pulled the door open and smiled – the flash of Nat’s red hair making his heart feel a little warmer. Suddenly, the knock didn’t seem like such a bad thing after all.

“Nat – how the hell are you?” Peter questioned, his arms opening to pull her into a hug. He gave her a tight squeeze, a sigh leaving his lips. Maybe it had been too long since he last saw people outside the norm – having Nat so close made that pretty easy to see.

“Peter Parker – you’ve been holed up here too long,” Nat exclaimed, her hands gripping his shoulders tightly. “I’m fine by the way, thanks for asking.” Her fingers dug in when she pressed forward to place a kiss to his cheek. “I’m here to force you to be social. Don’t try and argue.”

With wide eyes, Peter watched her brush by him, a mischievous grin on her face. Peter loved the fuck out of Nat – they’d been friends since undergrad at Colorado State. Growing up with someone sealed a sort of bond, he figured. What he didn’t love was her inability to stop fucking around with his personal life. Her many attempts to set him up were always terrible and always ended very badly – especially for him. Regardless, Peter already knew he’d go along with her plans. He always did. Though her taste was goddamn awful, he liked knowing that Nat had his best interest at heart – that she cared about him enough to want to see him happy.

Closing the door, Peter turned and pressed his back against it, a curious look in his eye. “Well, who is it this time? And, honestly, where do you keep getting these guys? Sure, I like older guys – but that doesn’t mean everyone qualifies,” Peter gestured with his hands the entire time he spoke, the habit one he’d never been able to break.

He laughed out right at the slightest hint of red on Nat’s cheeks, her eyes peeking out from under her long dark lashes – chagrin written into her facial expression.

“I swear – every time I think it’s going to be perfect. I think you’re just picky,” Nat answered back, her shoulders shrugging. “I think you’ll actually like this one, though. I met him when I pretended to be a secretary in a law office. When I served the guy I was actually there for, Eli and I got to talking – and he seems right up your alley. Smart, cute – older.” She slapped a hand to his cheek softly – “give it a chance, maybe? For me?”

Peter shook his head, a hand coming to press against his forehead in mock frustration. There were so many unaccounted-for variables in his life – it was difficult to explain that he wasn’t really looking for just anyone. There needed to be a connection and a certain level of understanding right off the bat – he didn’t have time to waste.

May always told him to go with his gut and most of the time, his gut didn’t want anything to do with the dating scene at all. His priorities were so different than most people’s – Peter needed someone to match that with their own uniqueness. How to get that across, though – he hadn’t figured that out. So, he smiled at her, surrender evident in his expression. “I always give it a chance. I’ll do that this time, too.”

The hug he got from her almost made up for the disaster he would eventually find out she was sending him into.

Instead of stepping into the Adidas joggers that were calling his name from the edge of the bed, Peter pulled a pair of jeans on – his body not used to the rigidity of the fabric after camping in scrubs for most of his life lately. He did a couple squats to get them stretched out, then slipped on a blue t-shirt and a jean jacket over that. The little bar she told him to head to looked pretty casual when he Googled the place – so he tried to take in what little comfort he could from the clothes on his body. He took one last look in the mirror before backing out of his room. If he didn’t get his ass in gear, he’d never leave the house. The couch called to him, the pull almost enough to keep him there. The look of disappointment he’d see in Nat’s eyes kept him walking, though – the date couldn’t be that bad.

Life always had a way of proving him wrong, though.

The bar wasn’t too far from his apartment, so he stepped out on foot. The night was really nice – it was closing in on May in New York City, so the temperature was perfect. There weren’t many clouds in the sky, either – the view absolutely stunning. Sucking in a deep breath, Peter told himself to focus on just enjoying the evening and whatever came from it. No use being nervous when there was nothing at stake. That thought brought a grin to his face – there weren’t a lot of things in his life that didn’t come with costly consequences. A little break in that monotony would probably help with the run-down feeling – at least, he hoped that was the case.

Walking into the bar, Peter was surprised to instantly feel comfortable. There were a good number of tables scattered around the space – each one thankfully within a decent distance of the other and not crowded together. The bar was wood, stained a dark brown, the accent of it matching all of the tables and chairs. He smiled at the high-backed chairs butted up to the bar top – he hated the places that didn’t provide proper back support. Peter climbed into one of them at the corner of the bar and knew he might make this a regular place. Comfort was of the utmost importance when the idea of being drunk came to pass – he couldn’t count the amount of times he’d fallen off of chairs in under grad. Being conscious of his terrible drinking habits brought down the embarrassing encounters – he at least looked like he could handle his liquor.

A coaster was placed down in front of him – the fingers he just barely managed to catch a glance at long and covered in ink, the knuckles dusted with the slightest bit of hair. Intrigued, Peter glanced up and instantly felt a blush overtake his cheeks. The bartender was striking – his angular jaw and well-kept facial hair demanded his eyes attention at first glance. Letting his eyes roam, Peter noticed the man’s heterochromia – the brown flecks in whiskey smooth eyes making his breath catch a bit. The man’s dark hair was a little on the longer side, the style of it seemingly unkempt – yet, probably done so on purpose. Peter felt his tongue slip out against his lower lip – the skin there suddenly dry as the desert. Even the elegant brow he quirked in Peter’s direction made him feel a little crazy.

“What can I get you?” Peter heard – his gaze finally trailing away, eyes focusing on the liquor on the shelf behind the gorgeous man. The last time he drank alcohol, it came from a red solo cup that was dipped into a cooler filled with fruit and various high-proof alcohols – he couldn’t remember a single drink to save his life. The man must’ve caught on to that because he spoke again – “do you like Sprite?” Peter couldn’t help but smile at that, his head nodding.

“I do. Anything lime,” Peter finally uttered, his brain slowly but surely starting to catch up to the here and now.

The older man nodded, a determined look on his face. “I’ve got just the thing, then,” he mumbled, a bit of his tongue sticking out as he grabbed a couple of bottles, his hands pouring like it was second nature. The man was slipping a drink before him a couple of minutes later, a fresh lime pressed against the rim of the glass and a couple actually in the drink. “Vodka-Sprite with lime – lots of it,” the words accompanied by a wink. He leaned forward on his arms, the smell of whiskey and cedarwood invading Peter’s senses.

As subtly as he could, Peter drew in a deep breath – the smell even better the more he pulled it in. He wrapped his fingers around the glass and brought it to his lips, Peter’s eyes catching the bartender’s over the rim of the glass. The kick of lime right off the bat made the drink more than tolerable – the nail polish remover taste of the vodka delightfully masked. He took a couple more sips before even thinking to acknowledge the unspoken question. It felt nice to have those eyes on him – so he took in a little bit longer.

“You’re pretty good. You can’t taste the booze in there at all. Thank you, handsome stranger,” Peter said, a saucy grin on his face. It didn’t make a lot of sense, this ruthless flirting – he didn’t partake in it often, if ever at all. Yet, he couldn’t keep the smile off his face or the blush from invading his cheeks – and there wasn’t even the ability to blame the booze. His fingers played with the little stir stick in the drink in hopes of calming himself down, the smile on his face was way too big.

In the way he ducked his head, Peter missed the big grin spread across the man’s face, his eyes twinkling in the low overhead light. “That’s usually the objective. Glad to have been of service, equally gorgeous customer.” The smile on his face that time was hard to miss, and Peter found himself leaning on the bar – desperate to get a little bit closer.

Peter would have been happy to continue flirting with the bartender – his hopes of being stood up increasing by the second. It seemed like he was destined to be thwarted all day long, though – a man about twenty years older than him was looking in his direction. Nat must have shown the guy his picture. Taking one last peek at the gorgeous human behind the bar, Peter collected himself and turned in his seat, a painted-on smile sliding across his cheeks.

“Are you Peter?” his date for the night asked, a hand coming between them. “I’m Eli.”

Peter took the hand offered to him, the palm against his a little sweaty in his grasp. “I am, yeah. Nice to meet you, Eli,” he gave him a brief smile and settled back into his chair. Whiskey barrel eyes caught his, the bartender smirking at him. Rolling his own, Peter stuck out his tongue and tried to focus.

----

It’d been a pretty average day for Tony – the weekend was finally upon them, he’d finished all of his grading for the week, and his shifts at the bar were the best for tips. He assumed the rest of the day would remain as such, too. There weren’t a lot of interesting things happening in his life at the moment – though, he didn’t really mind. Tony was a self-proclaimed opportunist – there wasn’t a lot of seeking out, but he wasn’t opposed to whatever came his way. So far, his robotic adventures and never-ending entertainment at the bar felt like more than enough.

Then, he walked in. For whatever reason, Tony looked up when the door opened – he’d been pretty idle at the bar, anyway. A quick glance was the intention, but what he found there stopped him in his tracks. The guy was young – right in the age range where he could be anywhere between 20 and 30. The jean jacket sitting on his shoulders made his mouth water, the tone of it meshing so well with tawny looks and pale skin. And boy – that skin. Tony figured it went on for miles, never ending amounts of it covering those long limbs. Blinking, Tony got his bearings – the last thing he needed was to be caught out staring at someone.

He felt a little more himself when the guy sat down at the bar, his hands were moving over the counter, the wash rag dragging back and forth over the surface. The key was to never go idle – an idle mind was never good for anyone. When the man spoke, his attractiveness quotient went up a couple of notches, Tony enamored by the pitch of his voice, the way he looked around and took everything in. When the opportunity to show off a little showed itself, Tony snatched it up and set about making one of his personal favorite drinks. He was more of a whiskey straight kind of guy, but where mixed drinks were involved, vodka soda was always a hit.

The roll of satisfaction washing over him brought a smile to his face – Tony couldn’t keep his eyes away while the other took tentative sips, the look on his face never straying from curious. Then, that very voice was calling him a handsome stranger – oh how he wanted to combust right on the spot. Instead, he kept the smile on his face and hoped the look in his eye was unreadable. Not for the first time, Tony felt grateful that direct access into his brain was unavailable. The guy leaning in his direction pushed the thoughts he was trying to hold back into overdrive – his neck flushing just slightly.

The universe always had a way of making things right, though – a man around Tony’s own age walked in and took the seat next to the cutie he hoped to find out more about. Shrugging, he clenched the glass he pulled from further down the bar in his hand. Their eyes met for a brief second; uncertainty evident in the younger man’s eyes. Despite knowing the guy was on a date, Tony felt obligated to keep an eye on him. Everyone needed a wing man, every now and again.

Tony got swept in a wave of people at the other end of the bar, so he only caught small glances of the cute brunette and his date – and the tension he felt from the get-go didn’t seem to be going anywhere. While the older man was leaning closer, the other was pressing into the back of his chair, a grimace on his face. Tilting his head, he caught the man’s eye again – a roll of them evident a second later. A soft chuckle escaped his chest, he got to witness lots of dates gone wrong, but this one seemed to take the cake. Softening his features, Tony tried to display as much empathy as he could – he felt bad for the guy. Though, there was also a part of him that felt a little excited by the failure of it. That greedy, greedy part of him.

There was a pretty decent ebb and flow of people for the next thirty minutes or so – Tony always kept count of the people sitting around his area. He learned early on that keeping ahead of the tide made his job a little easier – anticipation of people’s needs was like a game to him. One he’d gotten pretty good at, he liked to think, anyway. The shatter of a glass pulled him from his thoughts – the guy he’d been catching eyes with all night was off his chair, a sour look on his face. Tony watched closely as the guy mouthed ‘help me’ at him, a pleading look in his eye. Whatever the fuck caused that glass to be dropped, it seemed the guy didn’t want any part of it, anymore.

Thinking on his feet, Tony pulled his phone out, keeping it on the counter out of sight. He quickly typed in the number of the bar, watching with satisfaction as the phone on the other side of the room started to ring. Attempting to stroll that direction casually, Tony shot a look over to the other man, his right eye closing in a quick wink. More than anything, he hoped he could go along with whatever Tony came up with on the spot. Grabbing it, he answered the phone with the typical spiel – “Lefty’s, this is Tony.” He nodded a bit, let it seem like someone was talking – then took the portable over to the brunette.

“I believe this is for you,” Tony said boldly, his hand thrusting the phone at him. There was a curious head tilt in his direction, then the man was taking the phone and pressing it to his ear. Tony held his breath, the thought that maybe he was being a little crazy rushing through him at the last minute. Thankfully, the guy was nodding his head – those gorgeous doe eyes opening wide, the look one Tony thought he might enjoy seeing from above him and below him – all the ways, really. Biting down on the side of his tongue, Tony let the pain force him back to the reality where he currently stood, watching the scene playout.

“Okay, MJ – I’ll be right there.” The guy finally spoke into the phone, a determined look crossing his face. Tony wanted to run his thumb across the little lines that appeared on the brunette’s forehead. His mind rushed with so many thoughts – the anxiety of what he did and what would happen next closing in on him a little. In the many times he’d worked in this bar, Tony never did anything like this. He pretended to be someone’s boyfriend once, but that was for someone he actually knew. This person was a random stranger – a hot one, he had to admit – yet, still a stranger.

He watched him slam down a few bills and make a halfhearted excuse to the guy who was looking at him with a mixture of irritation and empathy – it made Tony want to laugh in his face. Moving around the bar, Tony went to work on getting the glass picked up and by the time he looked up again, the spot the men were sitting was empty. It smarted a little, not getting to flirt a little more, maybe see where it could have gone. Yet, he felt good about it, too. He obviously helped someone out of a tight spot. What more could a person ask for? Laughing at himself, Tony finished his clean up and took his spot back behind the bar.

Not even twenty minutes later, the brunette was back, a soft smile on his face. He took the same place against the bar, his elbows pressing into it. “Hey,” he began, his fingers tapping against those gorgeously rosy cheeks. “Thanks for that. I don’t think I could have made it another minute without busting a glass over his head. You’re too kind. I’m Peter, by the way,” the man – Peter – concluded. He didn’t stick out a hand to shake, or anything like that, he simply leaned against his hands and looked Tony up and down. It would have been unsettling, if he didn’t appreciate the human doing the looking. Try as he might, he couldn’t find it in him to be too goddamn upset about it.

“You’re very welcome. Bartender code, or whatever,” Tony replied, his tone just shy of being smooth. Long fingers ran through his hair, the gentle tug of it somewhat grounding. “Peter. That’s fitting for you. Cute but smart and classy. I’m Tony – rugged and roguish, right?” His mouth started to spread into a smile on its own accord, the stretch of his lips tensile before he even finished speaking.

As if the guy couldn’t get any more attractive, Tony heard him laugh fully for the first time. The sound was elegant, from the pit of Peter’s stomach. His head tilted back a little, the length of his neck on display – the pale skin there begging to be touched, kissed, caressed with barely there pressure. Brown eyes were quickly overtaken by a dilating pupil. He crushed the side of his tongue with his teeth again, Tony struggling to keep his composure. To keep his hands busy, he went about making Peter the same drink as before, his fingers idly brushing lime to the lip of the glass.

“Right – absolutely right. I would also add handsome, but I’m pretty sure I brought that to the table earlier. I also love your hair, the salt and pepper at the temples – A+.” Tony sucked in a breath, his fingers moving to slip into the hair by his ears. A quick tug and he was smirking in the other’s direction, Peter’s eyes still firmly on him.

“It’s natural, too,” Tony avowed, one of his eyebrows quirking to match the grin on his face. “Thanks, though. Your curls aren’t half bad, either.” As he said it, Tony used every ounce of control within him not to reach out and touch – the length would be so easy to run his fingers through. He didn’t have any clue where all these thoughts were coming from – he was usually pretty good at keeping himself and the job separate. Being a teacher, he knew how important it was to keep perspective in the proper position – yet, he liked the guys smile and how his mouth looked making words. What could he do?

Besides, it seemed to be mutual – Peter’s cheeks were a beet red, eyes now squinty from the force of the muscular contraction of his face muscles to continue the beaming smile. Peter took the drink when Tony passed it to him, his lips wrapping around the lip without a second thought. “I usually keep it a little shorter, it’s easier to just roll out of bed and get going. I just – haven’t had time to get it cut. I just might agree with you, though. They do make me look nice.” Peter let his pointer finger trace the lip of the glass while he spoke, the motion just as distracting as the words slipping from beautiful lips.

Taking a look over his shoulder, Tony noticed the bar was on the emptier side. Lucky for him. He pressed both of his hands flat on the counter below him and let some of his weight shift forward – the space between himself and Peter narrowing down ever so slightly. From this angle, Tony could see a few freckles littering the other’s cheeks – the youthfulness of the beauty marks making him look so very young for a second. There seemed to be a direct map of the constellation clusters across the skin – the intrigue of it adding to the attraction.

“What keeps you so busy? Not that I’m not all for roll out of bed and get going. That’s my usual most of the time. I think you would look nice regardless of what you did with your hair,” Tony offered, a hand motioning in the direction of Peter’s face. “You’ve got all of that going on.”

It felt natural – the conversation they were having. Tony wasn’t the most sociable person. He didn’t shy away from it, or anything like that, there were just personal limits. Effort was applied long enough to engage and respond – then, he’d inconspicuously retreat. As the man slinging the drinks, it felt pretty easy to fit into the woodwork when he wanted to. The back and forth Tony felt compelled to have with this guy was already way more than usual – a thing of interest in and of itself.

“I’m in med school. In the process of getting my MD so I can get into oncological research. It’s my last semester, so its been a little hectic.” Just the thought of the man’s commitment made him look stressed, the small black circles under his eyes making a lot more sense now. “And thanks – that’s quite the compliment coming from you.” Peter stopped for a second, his bottom lip between his teeth. “Do you get off soon? I’ve got to buy you a drink or food or something for being an absolute life saver.”

The sound of the door opening had Tony looking over his shoulder, a slight frown forming on his brow when people sat down at the far side of the bar. Glancing down, he noticed there were only 20 minutes until 8 – his whole face lighting up. Things were turning out a lot better than he originally expected. “I’m off in twenty, actually. Let me get those guys over there started on a tab and then I’m all yours,” Tony responded, jittery excitement zapping along his skin – the feeling of it so very foreign and so exquisitely nice.

Tony didn’t move until he saw Peter nod, a matching smile on those delicately pale cheeks. Turning, the older man suddenly desperate to be done with his work, Tony finished up without another thought. When Clint came in to cover the next shift, Tony greeted him briefly and escaped before he could get roped into anything else.

Joining Peter on the other side of the bar, he rested a hand against the man’s chair – catching his attention without scaring the piss out of him.

“Ready whenever you are.”  

----

Sitting in the same seat from before, Peter couldn’t believe the events of the last half an hour. Peter knew the date was doomed about a minute into it when Eli described Nat as his “hot friend”. There wasn’t a chance in hell – they hadn’t even started talking and Peter could already tell more misogynistic comments like that would come from the man’s mouth. There wasn’t any predicting how much worse it got, though. It’d been a long time since he was propositioned so quickly – and frankly, so out of the blue. They went from discussing Peter’s job to Eli wanting to take him home and get into his pants. What type of people was Nat surrounding herself with? And more importantly – why did she think this guy would be good for him?

The dam broke when the man tried to lay his hands on him. Their chairs were pushed close together, so he did the only thing he could think of – he dropped the drink from his fingers and stood up, the resounding smash of the glass breaking reassuring, hopefully a way out. Thankfully, he got the attention of the cute bartender and within a minute, he was back in front of them, a phone in his hand.

For a moment, Peter didn’t understand – his eyebrow quirking. The person he now knew as Tony looked at him, seemingly willing him to just go with the flow. He couldn’t even remember what came out of his mouth, but all of the sudden, he was free – Peter making his excuses and getting the fuck out of there as quickly as he could.

He almost continued his walk home, the adrenaline in his body telling him to keep listening to the flight reflex – the urge to go right there. Yet – it’d be pretty shitty of him if he didn’t at least thank the gorgeous man behind the bar for coming in clutch, so he walked across the street and lounged in the little café there – the view of the bar perfect.

Thankfully, Eli wasn’t stupid enough to wait around and he left about ten minutes later. Despite not being anywhere near him, Peter let out a caught-up breath – his entire chest felt tight since he made his narrow escape. Giving it another couple minutes to make sure the man didn’t return, Peter pulled out his phone and dialed Nat’s number, many not nice things sitting on the tip of his tongue.

When she did pick up, Peter didn’t give her a chance to reply to his nonexistent greeting – he simply barreled ahead and started talking. “You’re officially banned from setting me up. That guy was an absolute douche, Nat! He didn’t even make it a whole hour before he tried to start feeling me up. No more, okay? No more.” Peter stopped then, his chest heaving a little bit. “That shit was awful. If you’re my friend, you won’t do it again.”

“Shit, Pete – I’m so sorry! I didn’t know. He seemed okay. Older the way you enjoy them. I just – well, I’m not very good at this setting up thing.” Nat broke off, a chuckle in the back of her throat sounding across the line. “It won’t happen again, I promise.”

He kept her on the line for a couple more minutes, the conversation gentling before they hung up. She was only trying to help, he understood that. Nat had been trying to help since they first met all that time ago. At least he got her to admit that she was bad at it. And maybe, she’d actually listen to his plea and ease up the meddling. For all it was worth, Peter didn’t feel dissatisfied – a part of him couldn’t understand why she felt so adamant about it to begin with. Either way, he put his foot down and wouldn’t budge. Sparing her feelings wasn’t worth having to deal with shitty people, no matter how much he hated thinking about hurting her in any way at all.

Shaking his head, Peter pocketed his phone and left the café, his feet carrying him back across the street. The bar didn’t look any different, although the place next to his seat from before was blessedly empty. He walked back over to that same spot and leaned against the bar – the bartender’s attention already on him. Hell – most people’s attention was probably on him. The dramatic exit didn’t go unnoticed, Peter felt pretty sure about that. Crowd watching was one of the best parts of being in a bar and he provided some of the night’s entertainment.

Throughout the exchange with Tony, Peter felt more and more glad that he didn’t just skip out. Not only was the older man extremely good-looking, he came with a biting wit and interesting conversational style. It felt like the ultimate tease, waiting to hear what the guy was going to say next. The flirting came naturally, too. For whatever reason, there was an innate feeling of trust alive and well in Peter’s chest – the man’s actions speaking so loudly to the part of him that was so selective and choosy. It took a particular type of person to simply help a stranger – to provide aid for no other reason other than the fact that someone was in need.

Peter recognized that trait within himself, too – that similarity between them probably the most important one he could think of. Which is why he let himself invite Tony out and why he felt comfortable enough to actually see where the night could lead him. He watched with an unfamiliar feeling in his chest and a soft smile on his face – Tony worked diligently and efficiently. The man was good with the customers, too. He had a natural charm that Peter wanted to learn more about – wanted to see how it felt to be used in his direction.

So lost in his thoughts, the older man’s words had him jumping, a sharp blush hitting his cheeks almost instantly. Looking sheepish, Peter slid a hand through his hair, a small smile slipping across his lips. “I’m ready right now. I hope you don’t mind walking – the place I’m thinking is right around the corner,” Peter got himself back together quickly, his composure something he’d been working on since being around patients. People needed a poker face from someone delivering shitty news to them – someone had to give them hope.

Shaking the thought away, Peter felt his smile grow wider – Tony was leading them out of the bar without another word.

A little more relaxed, Peter took a second to notice the air outside, the temperature moderate, less stuffy than the enclosure of the bar packed full of people. He took a deep breath, his eyes slipping shut for a second. The sound of Tony’s voice wasn’t surprising this time, the warm tone of it slipping over him pleasant, comforting. “I’m glad to be out of there, the late Friday night gig is too crazy,” Tony spoke softly but clear, like he was used to talking in front of people – the confidence in his presentation present, out in the open.

He smiled in response and started walking, Tony moving to join him, keeping up effortlessly.

Boldly, Peter grabbed Tony’s elbow at the end of the sidewalk, the man trying to continue walking straight when they needed to turn. “I’m taking you somewhere, remember?” Peter questioned, his voice on the right side of teasing.

Tony didn’t answer, he simply nodded and followed his lead, absolutely no resistance in the arm still settled in Peter’s grip. It took more effort than it should have to drop Tony’s arm – but he kept up the contact in their closeness, each step caused the older man’s shoulder to brush against his own.

“So, is bartending your full-time gig? You’ve got excellent taste in your drink suggestions – but something tells me there’s more to you.” They’d been walking for a minute or two in silence, the lack of conversation surprisingly comfortable despite not really knowing one another. The start of the conversation wasn’t forced, Peter was just curious – interested in finding out more about his handsome hero.

The longer they walked, the more it seemed like Tony was leaning into him, so Peter let it happen – his fingers brushed against Tony’s whenever he could reach them. Neither gave into the temptation to hold hands – the tease of not knowing, of the journey of finding out more – that was the game at the moment. Peter bit his bottom lip, his head turning ever so slightly. It wouldn’t do to give away just how enamored he was, not yet, anyway.

“It’s not. I actually teach high school physics. Over at Midtown Science and Tech. I’ve got a Master’s in Mechatronics Engineering, so I use it building robots with my students and talking about gas laws and thermodynamics. It’s great,” Tony didn’t sound like he was joking, either – his eyes were vivid, the brightness in them genuine.

Peter would have never pegged the guy as a teacher, but now that he knew – it made sense. The immediate way he rushed in to help, to provide support – that’s what teachers did, every day, for all the students they came into contact with. If it weren’t for the eyes watching his every move and the rather hungry look Tony couldn’t seem to hide – he might have questioned the man’s interest. He couldn’t, though – coffee-colored eyes trailed over him like they wanted to undress him one article of clothing by the next. The gaze was intense and sent little shocks of excitement all around.

“My initial thought did not stray anywhere near teacher. I can see it, though. I bet you’re the teacher that everyone likes, too. You’re teaching thermodynamics, so you’re dealing with smart kids. I’d go so far as to say that you’re the nerdy hot teacher everyone’s lusting after.” Peter blushed at that, the thought of his younger self walking into his own AP Physics class to see Tony standing there – he would have crushed on him for sure. He could honestly say he might be there already, anyway. Tony’s snort in response had him blushing harder, his face so warm from the flush of blood pressing against his cheeks.

“I try not to think about it, Pete. Makes the job a little easier, you know?”

And he did know – perfectly well. There’d been just as many legal and ethics classes throughout his med school journey to understand that concept intimately. Better for him, anyway. He wanted Tony’s attention on him. With each second that past, the want for it only increased – that thought substantial in and of itself.

It took a couple more minutes to end up outside Del Mar’s – his favorite bodega in the city. Rotations at the hospital didn’t pay well, and for a few months during his first year navigating the inability to carry more than one job, Peter had to be very, very smart about his money. It didn’t take a genius to understand that good food at a cheap price couldn’t be beat – so he kept Del Mar’s on his always list and went there as often as his wallet allowed him. By that point, the owner knew who he was, how he liked his sandwich, and would usually slip him a discount. Besides – it was one of the best meals in this part of Queen’s.

Tony spoke up when he saw the sign, a look of recognition on his face. “I love Del Mar’s. The number four with extra pickles got me through finals week last semester.” His face was pulled into a light grin, the man’s arm already extending to open the door, holding it for Peter. “Nice choice. I’ll gladly take this as a thank you meal,” Tony shot him a wink, the look making Peter’s head swim slightly. How the hell did someone make that look so good?

----

The coincidence of being led to one of his favorite bodegas wasn’t missed – Tony didn’t really know what to do with it, but he noticed. He also noticed how much they touched throughout the walk from the bar. Tony wasn’t very good about being inconspicuous unless he was trying to, and he certainly wasn’t trying to in this instance. The fact that Peter reciprocated, pushed himself into Tony’s space – that spoke volumes, too. Watching him walk through the door, Tony also knew how much he wanted to get to know Peter – in all the ways that were possible.

It didn’t take them long to get situated with their sandwiches, Mr. Del Mar recognized them both and set his son to making their food. Peter’s added “can you squish down the bread?” made Tony turn his head, a laugh leaving his lips.

“Squish down the bread? Only you,” Tony mumbled, the words probably not even loud enough for the other man to hear him. It felt good, though – the easy camaraderie between them just as nice as the sight of the beautiful man before him. He felt an elbow in his side and a head leaning in close, like he was trying to whisper in Tony’s ear.

“Don’t knock it before you try it.” Peter hummed, the gust of his breath sending an army of gooseflesh rushing along his skin.

Tony worked hard to hold the groan that threatened to escape him down – Del Mar surely didn’t need to hear anything like that coming from his mouth. When their sandwiches were ready, Tony made a hasty retreat – Peter thankfully following behind him. The night air broke up the last of the noise and the ability to breath made his head a little clearer. What a fucking rush.

“Do you trust me?” Peter asked, his head tilted in question. His grip on the sandwich bag made Tony happy that they were dangling from his hand, not clenched in the other’s fist. Without thought, Tony knew the answer.

“Yeah, I do, actually. What did you have in mind?” Tony asked, his senses on alert and running on overdrive from all the conflicting things coursing through him.

Peter didn’t verbally answer, instead, he turned around and started to walk down the sidewalk again. The unpredictability of the arresting man only increased his interest and he followed along – no worries or cares in the world. They didn’t walk for very long, Peter stopped them in front of a building fire escape, a roguish grin on his face. Tony’s eyes were glued to the flash of skin that appeared when Peter jumped to grab the folded-up ladder – the movement smooth, like Peter was an athlete in another life.

They climbed the stairs quickly, the stability of them surprisingly sturdy. Peter kept their sandwiches out to the side the entire time, the care he was taking with them so, so endearing. Tony could picture that same care being applied to Peter’s patients and immediately knew the man would be a good doctor – no other details needed. When they eventually settled on the roof – Tony let out a low whistle, the view of the night’s sky a little weakening. He couldn’t remember the last time he looked up and saw such clarity. “Pete, this view is ridiculous,” Tony gasped out, the awe evident in his voice.

Peter nodded, his eyes alight – mile long legs carried him until the younger man plopped down against the raised edge, his back pressing against it. “I know – it’s probably my favorite in the city. A couple of years ago, I was still living with a roommate. One that liked to have loud sex pretty much all the time. I don’t think he ever went to class. Anyway – I was studying for an Immunology final and couldn’t focus, so I came for a sandwich. On my wanderings while eating, I noticed the stairs were down on the fire escape, so I sort of just – climbed them. When I got up here, I felt the first sense of peace since coming to the city. I come up here all the time now,” Peter finished with a shrug, his hands already fumbling with the bag.

Tony plopped himself down next to the other and relaxed back, the view even better from this angle. He took the sandwich when Peter handed it to him, his soft smile growing a little bit. Their fingers brushed in the hand off, the delicate brush of skin to skin so fucking powerful. Sucking in a breath, he fiddled with the paper covering his sandwich to distract himself for a second. “It’s nice – being so close to the sky. The clarity up here makes the world look a little different. Thanks for sharing it,” Tony finally murmured, his shoulder shifting until it pressed against Peter’s side briefly.

The man’s blush was the only answer he got.

They made idle chatter while they ate, Tony talking about his latest robotics project – the group of kids on the team some of his best yet. Peter listened so adamantly, his head nodding every now and again while he chomped down on his flattened sandwich. In turn, Peter told Tony more about med school, about how he hoped to find a lab that would let him get lost in groundbreaking research. It was fascinating, to watch someone so empowered talk about their desires. Tony found himself hanging on every word, his sandwich long gone by the time they resurfaced from the conversation.

There weren’t a lot of times when Tony felt like he was standing near someone who could keep up with him. It wasn’t cocky, either – he understood how his brain worked and knew there were few people like him roaming the world. And without trying, he walked into someone exactly like him. Peter wanted to use his brain for good – he wanted to help people. There was something to be said for a person like that. Regardless of the man’s bad luck with his date earlier in the evening, Tony couldn’t deny how happy it made him – the way everything worked out.

They chatted for a little while longer, neither man in any hurry to be anywhere or part from the other. It was Peter’s “I should probably head home,” that brought Tony out of the daze he’d been in since sitting down next to the younger man. Glancing at his watch, he noticed that it was approaching midnight. The last few hours flew by – it didn’t seem nearly as late as it actually was. It took him a minute to nod, Tony wanting to soak up this moment just a little longer. Tony got up and dusted his hands and jeans off before holding a hand down for Peter to grab.

Long arms wrapped around his shoulders, the tug of Tony’s grip pulling Peter from the ground and up onto his feet. He thought for a second that he made Peter lose his balance – but then the arms around him tightened and the other’s face was pressing into the length of his neck. Tony let his own arms embrace Peter around the waist, his grip tightening to bring their bodies closer together. A soft nose brushed against his collar bone and under his chin – the touch innocent and tender. His arms squeezed on their own accord, the hold on Peter getting a little cozier.

The next thing Tony knew, lips were caressing his cheek, the barely there kiss fleeting and absolutely perfect. “Thanks for tonight, Tony.”

Tony pressed the side of his head against Peter’s and kept him there, the clutch of his arms the only thing he could think of to response with. There wasn’t anything to say. He helped because he could – there weren’t any other motives. The end result, well – that was just a happy accident. Turning his head, Tony slipped his nose into Peter’s hair, lips glancing against his head.

They parted ways at the bottom of the stairs, Peter grabbing Tony’s phone from his hand before he could even think to ask for his number. Later, when he finally let himself look, he grinned at the new name in his contacts – ‘Peter Parker’. It had a nice ring to it and totally fit the man attached to it. He sent off a quick text to make sure the younger man had his number and went about his way – the walk home one of the most peaceful ones he’d experienced in a long time.

Things stayed pretty casual between them for a while after that. It felt easy to simply chat about things that happened throughout the day – Peter did a good job describing the nicer parts of his job and strayed away from the heavier stuff. There were sometimes descriptions of co-worker drama, or the stupidity of professors waiting for him when Tony got a chance to take a look at his phone.

The rest of the day always went a little quicker when he got to have a couple exchanges with the man, his own stories about failing students and the many times one of his student’s grandmother passed away in attempts to get out of assignments. The uncomplicated way Tony could just be with Peter kept him from being bored and feeling an iota of loneliness.

They occasional met for low key dates, Peter’s schedule was so hectic, they usually ended up in one of their apartments eating take out and watching whatever they found interesting on Hulu. Tony helped Peter study on the night’s when the other was too exhausted to do much of anything – and they necked on the couch like teenagers when the doctor in training had more energy to spare or had the next day off.

It felt good to be restrained – getting to know Peter made the anticipation for the physical shit to come thrum with life, each little detail like a small secret to add to the growing list Tony kept in the back of his mind. In forty years of life, Tony hadn’t ever had a relationship like this – one that took the time to grow and evolve, to actually be nurtured before shit became too complicated.

So, it made sense – how uncomplicated their first encounter turned out to be. A little while into things, Peter introduced him to one of his hobbies. There weren’t many things Peter devoted his time to, so Tony was excited to hear all about the dodgeball team the younger man put together with a few of his coworkers. The invite to his game later that weekend was immediately accepted – Tony couldn’t wait to see Peter in action. In their time together, Tony wasn’t any closer to understanding the mystery of one Peter Parker – and he liked it that way.

The most surprising thing about it ended up being just how much Tony liked the sight of Peter in a cut off blue shirt with a Rambo style headband tied around his head. The muscles of his arms were trim, a little on the thin side, though the definition of each muscle was absolutely there. The black-out under his eyes brought a new dimension to the look – Tony suddenly so very taken by the whole situation. A twitch in his pants told him just how taken he really was, the jeans he was excited to wear suddenly a lot tighter – a lot more uncomfortable.

The feeling didn’t ease, either. Peter played dodgeball the same way he did everything – knowledgably, intensely, and with his tongue peeking out of the corner of his mouth. Every time he threw the ball, the muscles in Pete’s arms tensed, the definition becoming even more refined. The celebratory high fives and fist pumps took home the gold, though – Tony never wanted to lose the image of pure excitement on Peter’s face. He hoped that it might come in handy a little later on.

Tony forgot about the heat for a little while – the man so into the game, he didn’t know how loud he was cheering until the person next to him shot a look. Smirking, Tony shot out of his seat the next time Peter got someone out, his hands clapping together loudly. “Way to go, Petey!” Tony exclaimed, his eyes trained on the lady next to him.

It got a little better when Peter’s eyes caught his from across the court, a small smile on his face. In the end, Peter’s team ended up winning and Tony pissed that lady off a whole lot more than he initially set out to – which he wasn’t all that mad about.

The energized Peter that slammed into his arms a little while later was something new. There was sweat still clinging to his brow and a little bit of the black-out still smudged under his eyes – that much was recognizable. The simmering look that sat right at the surface, that was something Tony didn’t recognize. It became rather clear what it was, though – Peter’s lips caressing his in the next moment directive enough. Tony thrust his hands into the other’s sweaty locks and pulled him closer, his head tilting ever so slightly to fix the angle, to deepen the kiss.

A round of cheers was the only thing that brought them out of the passionate embrace. Tony looked over Peter’s shoulder to see the rest of the team approaching them. Peter rested his head on Tony’s chest, the huff of a sigh evidenced in the warm gust of air leaking through his shirt to grace his skin. Peter turned and introduced him to everyone, the collective welcoming him with open arms. They’d been keeping things on the low, just to have some time enjoying the thing between them while it was still just that – between them. It felt good, though – to be acknowledge by Peter as someone important to him.

All bets were off the second they walked into Tony’s apartment, however. Peter ripped off his shirt without a second thought – his arms pulling Tony in until their lips were on each other, the other’s tongue insistent, searching – yearning for Tony. Overwhelmed for a second, Tony focused on the lips on his first. He returned the kiss with equal measure. His hands joined the party next, desperate palms finally getting to press against smooth skin, the feel of it so goddamn soft. A moan ripped from Tony’s throat, effectively breaking the kiss. Peter didn’t miss a beat, he tugged at the hem of Tony’s shirt until the offensive article of clothing was on the floor, joining his own.

Tony couldn’t stand the distance between them and closed it, his being eager to be sealed at the lips with Peter again. He let his hands wrap around the man’s lower back, hands slipping under the damp waistband of Peter’s shorts – fingertips brushing against the round globes of flesh there. Tony pushed his hands as far as they could go, eager palms filling with the fullness of Peter’s cheeks. Their lips stayed busy, the hum of approval on his lips enough to know the other didn’t mind his wandering hands.

They made it as far as the couch before Tony got impatient and pushed Peter down onto it. His hands worked to take off shoes, socks, and shorts – the man on the couch cushions now encased in only his spandex boxer briefs, the black a solid contrast to the pale flesh underneath. Tony made quick work of his own get up until he was as equally undressed as Peter.

A palm pressed down on the bulge in his underwear, the damp spot causing his eyes to slam shut – the bite of his teeth in his bottom lip stopping a moan from shooting from his lips. Looking up, Tony had to catch his breath – Peter followed suit, his hand gripped himself over top of the fabric keeping him clothed. This time, the moan fell straight from his lips – their eyes connecting as the sound radiated around the otherwise quiet room.

Taking that leap, Tony kicked out of his underwear before joining Peter on the couch, his eager fingers already working to pull the sexy black fabric from the younger man’s skin. As he pulled them down, Tony pressed his fingertips into muscled thigs, across ticklish knees, and down over hairy shins – the soft fur on top of Peter’s feet brushing his skin tantalizingly. Now naked, Tony took his time to stare down at the beautiful body spread out before him – the lengthy limbs covered in unmarred skin, his cock nestled in the v of his thighs, the flesh thick and the head already glistening with want.

“Fucking finally,” Peter gasped out when Tony pressed in and gave them the first taste of fully naked flesh on flesh. Tony tucked his head into the gap of Peter’s neck – his chuckle quickly turning into a moan vibrated into the skin. Peter’s impatience reared its head, the younger man’s hips pressing against him – the fluid he so steadily leaked smearing on Tony’s cock, his pubes, even the skin of his stomach.

Tony pressed a swift kiss to Peter’s neck, his hips dropping and finally pressing their lengths together. “Fuck,” Tony babbled, his head moving until he could see Peter, their eyes catching, gaze hot. “I’m not going to last long,” he admitted, the feeling of heat creeping from his toes, up his legs, and into the middle of his core was persistent – it’d been a long time since someone this beautiful graced his bed. And it felt like forever since he’d been wanting Peter. The touch of his skin made him feel crazy – absolutely out of his head.

Desperate to distract himself, Tony sealed his lips over Peter’s, the kiss hard and oh so sloppy.

“Touch me, please. I want your hands on me – on us. Please, baby. Please – “ Peter panted out, his head turning to the side to catch some air. The usually pale skin was covered in a flush – the blood rushing in all different directions making his skin a rosy color and completely covered in sweat. It was beautiful – Peter was beautiful, in all the ways – all the personifications of it, too.

Unwilling to anything other than comply, Tony wiggled his hand down between their chests, fingers wrapping around the both of them – their lengths clenched in his grip in the most perfect of ways. The slippery nature of Peter’s slick made the pass of his hand over the sensitive skin of both their cocks deliciously sweet – the glide smooth, hypnotic. The combined keens and whimpers leaving both men’s lips played as the soundtrack of their coupling – Peter’s repeated ‘yes, yes, yes’ just about enough to push Tony over the edge right then and there.

The shooting wave of heat increased when Peter added his pumping hips to the mix. Tony’s hand was already stroking them with quick wrist movements, his wrist turning a little bit the closer he got to the tip – the drips of glorious precum from both their cocks a steady lubricant and delectably succulent. “I’m close, I’m close,” Peter babbled, his hand slipping between them to join Tony’s in the tight squeeze around their cocks.

The tangling of their fingers increased the pressure and the subtle lift of Peter’s hips was too much – too fucking delectable to hang onto any longer.

“Oh, god – Tony!” Peter shouted first – his cum striping both their stomachs, each pulse of it warm – succulent.

Tony bit into his lip, the pain mixing perfectly with the pleasure – the combination enough to barrel the orgasm right out of him. “Pete, baby… fuck – “ Tony added to the mess lingering between them, the stickiness on his hands and chest pulling a shudder from him. The lingering aftereffects of his orgasm blanked out everything but the rise and fall of Pete’s chest against his own.

----

The very next morning, Peter woke to the press of lips against the side of his head and a hand tangling in his curls, the touch light. “I’ve got to get to work, Pete. There’s a key on the counter by the coffee machine. Lock up when you leave – and keep it. See you later,” Tony’s voice was light, the man’s obvious attempt at not waking Peter up for good. He was thankful – the pull of his heavy eyes was already trying to tug him back under.

Reaching up, Peter grabbed Tony’s cheeks and pulled him down until they were kissing. His lips felt a little raw from the night before, the burn from Tony’s mustache and goatee luscious – the right side of painfully delectable. When he pulled back, Peter let their noses brush for a second, the gesture intimate. He felt a little more tied to the other man now – the physicality between them enough to cement a lot of things. It felt odd, to have waited so long. Yet, the outcome felt better than any other sexual experience he ever shared with someone. And they hadn’t even fucked yet.

“I’ll see you later. Have a good day at work, Mr. Stark.” Peter chuckled at the look of surprise on Tony’s face. Then, he smirked, Tony’s hand coming up to brush against the hair on his chin. Peter saw that gesture enough to know that was Tony’s thinking pose. Grinning, Peter used a sleepy hand to gesture him out the door. “Go, go. Don’t be late for class.”

Peter felt another kiss pressed to his head, then the smell of Tony’s cologne retreated – the thought dissatisfying for about a second. Snuggling back into the pillow, he quickly forgot about any sort of disappointment he might have felt trying to bubble up.

A couple hours later, Peter woke up to his phone buzzing on the nightstand. He grabbed it, his sleepy eyes checking out the screen. Seeing Tony’s name had him waking up a little more thoroughly, the sleepiness drifting away as he swiped his thumb across the screen to answer the call. “Tony – everything okay? Free period isn’t until after lunch, right?” Peter spoke worriedly, his body now completely upright – the cobwebs of sleep now completely gone.

“Hey, Pete. Sorry to wake you up, baby. I left my file folder on the kitchen table and I have a test next period – which the copies of are in that folder. Would it be possible for you to bring it to me? I wouldn’t ask, but if I postpone this test, we’ll be a whole week behind – we’re too close to AP exams for that.” Tony’s tone of voice didn’t broker any arguments – Peter knew he wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Grinning at the thought, he started to climb out of bed.

“It would be possible. How much time do I have? I can just leave for my rounds when I’m finished,” Peter replied, his feet hitting the cold floor for the first time that day – a sigh leaving his lips at the feeling.

He could hear some rustling, then a door opening and shutting. “My next class is in an hour. I’ve got robotics doing a write up today. I’ll owe you, Pete.” Tony’s voice dropped an octave with that last bit – Peter imagining that the man’s eyebrows rose and fell with the words, too.

Knowing he could be showered and ready in less than half an hour, Peter stood up and made his way to the front room. If he was going to take the damn thing, he needed to make sure he knew what it was. The folder was easy to spot – the bulkiness of it a Tonyism, the lack of organization stupidly endearing. “Blue folder, right?”

“Blue folder. Pete, you’re the best. Thank you.” Tony sounded sincere, like Peter was really doing him a solid. He had to admit, being appreciated for the little things wasn’t the worst. The whole being in a relationship wasn’t the worst, either, if he were being honest with himself.

He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth before answering, the need to damper his smile there – despite the fact that it was quickly becoming difficult to do so. “It’s the least I can do. I’ll shoot you a text and let you know when I get to Midtown. Go back and keep your kids in order.” Tony chuckled on the other side of the phone and Peter joined him, the action making him feel light – floaty.

Kicking himself into gear, Peter stripped off the sleep pants he borrowed from Tony and stepped into the shower – this stall much bigger than the one in his tiny apartment. He indulged a little, washing his skin and hair with Tony’s body wash and shampoo – smelling like him for the rest of the day sounded pretty nice. Especially during rotations, one sniff and the soothing reminder of Tony and the comfort he brought would make it all better.

It felt nice to luxuriate in the first sleep over moment, too. Every breath that picked up the distinct Tony Stark scent would be a reminder of their time together, of the way Tony pulled pleasure from him like it was what he’d been made to do.

A little bit of forethought meant Peter had an extra pair of scrubs in the backpack he brought with him to the game the day before – so he slipped them on, the light blue pair one of his favorite sets. Letting his hair dry a little, Peter put a piece of bread in Tony’s high-tech toaster and ate it sitting on the counter – the fancy strawberry jelly in the fridge some of the best he’d ever had. Licking his fingers, Peter cleaned up after himself and finished getting ready.

His heart pounded double time for the first couple seconds after picking up the house key. It was solid black and matched with Tony’s sleek aesthetic – and it fit perfectly on his carabiner, the sight of it making his breath hitch. No matter how sleepy Peter was that morning, he understood the immensity of the gesture. Tony was letting him into his life in a more permanent manner. Though they’d been inseparable for a few months now, they never talked about it. He should have known Tony would find a subtle way to get his point across.

After forcing himself to pocket the key, Peter grabbed the file folder, pressing it into his backpack with the rest of his study material. He took another look around the room, a warm feeling washing over him – though he’d been here more than a few times, it felt a little different now. He’d probably never be able to look at the couch without thinking about the way Tony stroked him off, the way he came so hard because of the man. Wetting his lips, Peter backed out of the room and exited the house, his shiny key fitting into the lock easily.

Midtown was only a ten-minute walk from Tony’s house – the very adult decision to live close was beneficial and cut down on the amount of effort Peter needed to put forth to get there. Lots of time, he told himself – lots of time. There weren’t too many people out at this time of the morning, so he got to be a little leisurely about it. His entire body felt buoyant, lighter than air – and he knew it was because of Tony and the way things were slowly starting to knit together for them. He was about to walk into the man’s school for fucks sake!

Pulling out his phone, Peter sent off a quick text.

Peter Parker [10:40AM]: I’m here – what’s next?

Tony Stark [10:42AM]: You need to check in at the office. Stacy at the front desk knows to look out for you. She’ll direct you back to my classroom. Tony Stark [10:42AM]: Thanks again, Pete.

Smiling, Peter walking in through the front doors and right into the office, the place thankfully not a complicated maze. Stacy was a nice older woman who wore bright red lipstick and smiled widely. She looked at him for a couple extra seconds when he handed over his ID – a knowing sort of glimmer in her eyes. For the first time, Peter thought that maybe Tony did not have anyone bring him things like this – especially a younger person like himself. He just smiled and let her give him directions to the science hall – she told him that Tony’s door would be recognizable.

And it was – it so was. There was a 2D robot plastered to the door, the cutout surrounded by science quotes and a cute handmade Stark Industries sign – the man telling Peter that his robotics team deemed themselves that during one of their competitions a few years ago. He knocked on the door lightly, his head peeking through the window for a second – his eyes widening when he noticed a whole lot of eyes looking over at him. Tony caught his eye and smiled – the look grateful and excited and happy all at once.

Peter took a step back when Tony opened the door and stepped out – the anti-slam mechanism on the door making it shut slowly. Tony’s arm wrapped around him and tugged him into a one arm hug – his lips pressing against Peter’s cheek. “Thanks for coming. I was so wrapped up in you and us and how fucking happy I am that I totally forgot. You’re a lifesaver.” Tony’s smile was soft, his eyes a bit gooey – his happiness radiating.

He slipped one of the straps off his shoulders and brought the backpack around, his fingers working the zippers easily. “I’m liking the sound of that. And I’m happy to help. I like being able to see where you work. Mr. Stark has a new meaning for me now,” Peter replied coyly. Handing over the folder, Tony let his fingers linger on Peter’s skin for a moment, the two sharing a look – the soft smile on Pete’s lips reflected right back at him.

A noise had Peter looking up – his eyes widening when he saw a couple of the students from the front row pressed up against the door, watching their interaction. “I think we’ve got an audience,” Peter whispered, his hand coming to the side of his mouth to make it look a little sneakier. He felt Tony’s snort against his cheek, the gust of air warm.

“Sneaky shits can’t mind their own business.” Tony murmured back, his free hand reaching up to rest on the soft skin of Peter’s cheek. “You and I will be the gossip of the school for the next few weeks, so we might as well give them something to talk about.” Peter got what he meant about a second before Tony’s lips touched his own – his eyes slipping shut at the touch, regardless. The kiss was soft and chaste, barely there – yet one of the best they’d shared yet.

“I’ll see you tonight?” Tony asked pulling back, his hands once again in his own space – the toasty warmth on Peter’s skin the only reminder of the touch being there.

Peter nodded, his hand reaching out to brush along Tony’s lip – the slightest bit of shiny spit lingering there. “I’ll see you tonight. I’ll be done with my shift around 8.” He shouldered his backpack, preparing himself to leave. “Text me when you’re done for the day.” Peter shot him a wink and took another step back – the distance between them just enough for Tony to break from the haze of their connection and step back into the classroom.

He was about to walk away when he heard a voice through the wall – “Mr. Stark, was that your boyfriend?”

His stomach clenched; ears peeled to hear the response.

“Yeah, it was. Now stop gawking over how cute he is and let’s get back to thermodynamic equilibrium.”

Grinning, Peter hoped this floaty feeling of being so in love would never leave.  

[nocvil]

*            ‐            ․            ↺            𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙍𝙊𝘿𝙐𝘾𝙄𝙉𝙂 . . .  ｓｏｏ ｂｏｇｕｍ . hitman        .        caretaker        .        the heel        .        a masked hell        .

❝   my love     ,     my love     ,     my love     ,     won't you stay a while     ?   ❞

possible tw’s below: parental death mention, illness mentions, murder for hire mentions, and uh m,,, i think that’s it rlly. just warning ok.

GENERAL INFO

full name: soo bogum ( 수 보검 ). nickname(s): bo, sweetie pie to his mother (: gender & pronouns: cismale, he/him. sexual & romantic orientation: aromantic, demisexual. age & dob: twenty-five, november 8th, 19-- birthplace/hometown: seoul, sk. parents/siblings: only child, deceased father, living mother. pet(s): absolutely not LOL. astrological sign: scorpio. >:-) dominant hand: both! handwriting style: mostly writes in very slanted cursive. i feel like when you see things like royal documents signed or very important letters written back in the day with that vintage cursive ... that would be bogum. language(s) known/spoken: spanish, english, korean. religion: LOL. ok. current living arrangements: a two-bedroom, two bath apartment complex with his older, npc mother. it is pretty spacious given they both have their own room, a kitchen, dining space, their own bathrooms, and a patio. bo has the money if you kno what i mean ... (: occupation/major: hitman.

PHYSICAL

picture reference: uhh... this? this look rlly gives off bogum vibes so (: blood type: type O. nationality: korean. skin tone/color: lighter tanned. birthmarks & scars: heheh wouldn’t u like to kno ??? height: five-foot ten inches. 5′10″. build: pretty average, more on the lean/athletic side though. hair color: red. hair length: uhm ,, look at reference photo? eye color: brown. diet: uhm ... bo has a pretty average diet probably. he would eat just about anything, not very picky. i think he probably has his favorites when it comes to chips and candy but he doesn’t have a special diet. exercise & level of fitness: LOOOL. let me not make a bad joke here ): how’s their posture ( or lack thereof )?: bogum probably has really good posture! i think standing tall with a straight back probably adds to his uh... authoritative look?  typical style of dress: ( from his stats page ) dresses a bit old school, vintage?, almost plain. likes wearing tucked in and cuffed shirts, rolled up pants, boots, baseball caps, at least three rings on one hand, gold bracelets. the following outfits aren’t specific to him but they are probably kinda similar. it’s hard to rlly find exact examples ): (  1  /  2  /  3  /  4  ) body modifications: none, surprisingly. probably pierced ears that he never puts earrings in. that’s really it though. he would prob like a tattoos but wouldn’t do it for the sake of his career ( because tattoos are distinguishing features ).

MANNERISMS

how does your muse walk?: def with a bit of power in his step. very protective when he is with his mother. mostly, he would walk like he calculates every single step he takes. how does your muse talk?: HAHA i just talked about this with myungok’s mun ,, he would talk very plain and probably without a lot of emotion. this would make things that are usually out of pocket probably sound kinda weird.  what accent/dialect does your muse talk with?: he is from seoul and according to google, they speak with a gyeonggi dialect there (: how would you describe the tone of their voice? are they loud or quiet?: QUIET... shh... if you speak too loud you won’t hear bogum speaking with such monotoned you could probably fall asleep. bogum asmr when?  what does their laugh sound like?: bogum? LAUGHING? i feel like bogum chuckles. so he would have like a short, quiet laugh. how does your muse typically smell?: either like smoke from a cigarette or like his mom’s perfume. what kind of air do they carry?: well jinae’s mun said he would have a dark and heavy presence and honestly that rlly fits the bill. do they have a(ny) catchphrase(s)?: time to die. what are their nervous ticks?: um.. not sure. probably knuckle cracking and finger tapping.

PSYCHOLOGY

what makes your muse happiest?: his mommy! seeing his mom thrive and gain her confidence back, even momentarily, makes him so happy. what upsets them the most?: ugh. listen. i talked abt this with some of y’all but the thought that if he ever got exposed or arrested ... how everyone in his life, including his mother, would just abandon him ... CRIES. was this supposed to be a general question? does your muse have any quirks?: i think his tendency to just be way too lax in certain situations would be his infamous quirk. what are their hobbies? how frequent do/can they do them?: bogum is definitely a simple man. he would totally like puzzles, word searches, watching the news, scrapbooking ( YES, SCRAPBOOKING ), taking walks, shopping with his mom, writing, idk, he doesn’t do anything OD or over the top. shrug. do they have any guilty pleasures?: is your muse an extrovert or an introvert? neither?: 10000% introverted otl. do they have high or low self-esteem? what about confidence?: uhm... bogum probably has an average amount of confidence/self-esteem. he’s a realist, definitely. if he look ugly he look ugly. if he look good he look good. ‘nuff said. are they easily stressed and how do they normally respond to it?: stressed? bogum could be in the midst of a bank robbery and be sitting there like ok, y’all done yet? what is your muses worst fear?: his mother finding out about his job. what is your muses biggest dream?: to either escape his job for good or to be able to heal his mother of all her injuries and illnesses. but of course, neither of those will ever happen! is your muse a morning person or a night dragon?: a night dragon? ok. anyway he is probably both. i can see bogum getting like four hours of sleep and waking up like (: let’s fuckin go! how intelligent is your muse? do they acknowledge it?: OH BOGUM has street smarts but definitely probably not book smarts. at least, not a great amount of book smarts. how can he be a hitman if he’s DUMM?! describe their sense of humor: LMAO. the real question is how can someone as funny as ME play someone as BORING as bogum?

RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES

are they currently in any sexual or romantic relationships?: HELL NO. luuuul. what is their experience with relationships?: to really think about it, bo probably had feelings for people here and there and most likely dated short term in high school but after he moved and began doing that he kind of lost all his effort to pursue romance. how does your muse view the idea of friends with benefits? have they ever had one? would they ever?: another hell naw to that sis. how important is sex to your muse?: not important at all. bogum could care less. what are their biggest turn on and turn offs?: see above pls. does your muse find it easy to make friends?: i say yes, only because most of his friends are through his mother. how important is friendship to them?: veRY IMPORTANT if bogum didn’t have the friends he has today, he probably would be a lot more sad and maybe more than just a hitman ): quantity or quality of friends?: quality! how important is family?: VERY IMPORTANT AGAIN bogum would give his life for his mother and to have his father back. are they close to their family? why or why not ?: YES. obviously asdfasdf everyone probably knows why. although bogum is now the one who runs the house, he still really values his mother because she ultimately has nobody but him in the end if she gets worse. his parents were always really good to him and when his father died, he knew that he and his mother had to stick together through it. he also knew that that he had to step up to provide for his mother because of her injuries and dementia. she is his life, really.

FAVORITES

activity: haha. you really wanna kno?... he likes word searches a lot. animal: idk. probably like. idk.  beverage: mmmm some piping hot tea. book: - color: is red cliche to say? designer: - food:  flower:  water lilies, pansies, lilies, peonies, idk, he would love all kinds of flowers. gem: i googled these. if he had a favorite it would be garnet, smoked topaz, and morion. holiday: christmas! his mother’s favorite too, probably. mode of transportation: walking, usually. movie: -  musical artist: oh boy, uhm,, i bet bogum likes indie kpop. like dean, suran, hyukoh, but i dont rlly know a lot to give you more details. quote / saying: - scenery: hm. probably night time in the living room, mom is put to bed already, he’s watching a rerun episode of a crime drama on television and thinking about how it’s so unrealistic. he’s got a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other though he puts it out halfway through because he loses interest. (: scent: i think he’d like the smell of cleaning products, flower scents ( bc it would remind him of his mom ), and metal (: obviously. weather: cloudy or rainy weather. anything that let’s him stay inside for the day. vacation destination: UM. i bet bogum would like to travel out of country to places like europe.

ATTITUDES

greatest dream: to finally have a peaceful life with his mother by his side, healthy or not. he wants to stop being a hitman, really, but it’s kind of like an addiction, plus he’s good at it, and it brings in the bacon. greatest fear: being caught and leaving his mother by herself -- it would be like the ultimate let down since he doesn’t trust anyone with her. most at east when: pls see scenery in section above. least as ease when: out in public by himself. he doesn’t have his mom as his cover. worst possible thing that could happen: PLS SEE GREATEST FEAR. ajdfkjasdfskf biggest achievement: moving to seoul safely with his mom! biggest regret: falling back into the crime life. most embarrassing moment: idk i feel like bogum isn’t embarrassing. he’s too ,, plain. biggest secret: LMAO well ... i think we all know. top priorities: keeping his mom safe, alive, healthy, and her bills paid for. also keeping himself undercover for the most part and making sure neither him or his mother are overwhelmed.

EXTRA TIDBITS

001. bogum is an unhealthy smoker but a social drinker. he never smokes around his mother though.

002. whenever bogum’s mother is around, he is on his own best behavior. he always does his best to be nice and keep up an image of her sweet son although by himself he can be different.

003. so far the only person who knows about his job is sangwoo because he sort of saw him in the act during his first hit. the two joke about it but bogum would take him out in a heartbeat if he spills.

004. i think it’s funny because i always pictured bogum as that person would give the shirt off of his back for you if you were in trouble. but he also wouldn’t hesitate to threaten to make you disappear.

005. his mom doesn’t know how he gets the money to pay for everything but bogum has her believing he “has his ways” and to “just trust him” although she asks about it every now and then.

006. though he stays inside a lot, some of the places you might see bogum outside of his apartment, are grocery stores close to his place, bars around town, museums, little cafes picking up things for his mother, dawon’s flower shop, and very occasionally places where there are a lot of drug activity.

007. here is smth: bogum is a hitman because his father was killed in a hit!

008. despite his mom questioning where he earns his money, his family has always been pretty well off but that was because of his father. so now that his father isn’t alive, it’s kind of ... fishy.

009. lmao probably your very typical scorpio minus the s*xual stuff.

010. my brain stopped working.

AESTHETICS

a card hand full of royals. empty, dark hospital hallways. dirty hands under black leather gloves. an empty, lonely wheelchair. old black and white photographs. an ashtray full of half smoked cigarettes. ripped up diary pages. rolled up fifty dollar bills. two expensive rings on each finger. responding “k” to a paragraph long text message. tri-folded letters written in the upmost calligraphy. roman numeral clocks.

[firebirdsdaughter]

Alright...

... A wee bit more rested, and w/ a better quality video, we are back at it! XD

In no order:

Okay... Seems the Wozes aren’t switching off... Which is vaguely disappointing. I wanted to some day see them fight over the recap.

THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY A FAMILY MOMENT. Sworz is scolding Heure, and he even straight up is like ‘Are you listening to me?’ like a frustrated dad, oh my god. XD

So... What did Mirror¡Shinji just hang out in there mirror world and didn’t get effected by the time alteration, or... What. Not complaining, just curious,

Ah. So this, too, is Decade’s fault.

That look Sworz gave his son there was somewhere between proud and suspicious.

Oooo, infinite mirror trick!

Really? We’re really just gonna... Skip Geiz coming home? Really? *cries in exasperated, friendship-obsessed language*

Well, the boys are still working together well--even if this fight isn’t going great.

I love the parts of these three hanging out discussing things. I just live the Zi-Ot3, okay?

They’re having a sit down to discuss all the multiple timelines and goals of everyone involved, using chess pieces. This is adorable.

Awww. Sougo’s asking what future they want. I think he’s been playing it down, but is genuinely kinda bothered by the ‘Geiz is still gonna kill you’ thing. Partially bc he really wants to think that he can not become Puma Zi-O, rather than the only option being to kill him.

Oh my god, that cute little smile.

Geiz.exe has stopped working. God, Sougo, I get why you’re asking, but you know Geiz is bad at feelings! You’re gonna break him!

I think that also just showed very well that whatever Shiro Woz has said, Geiz is still just getting more conflicted. That was the face of someone who has no idea what they want anymore.

Tsukuyomi to the rescue! She’s well-acquainted w/ Geiz’s problems w/ interpersonal relations.

Aw, look at the babies investigating!

Oooo, editor man looks good!

This is so ‘amateur investigators’ and I LOVE IT.

Geiz ensuring the other two cover their mouths and noses before coming in (also him just using the collar XD). Even if it’s tiny, I love protective Geiz.

Yay! Shinji lives! It’s okay, dude. It’ll be okay. Having watched the ep once I get why you’re upset, but I promise it’s okay.

Also, Ren, come get Shinji. He’s gonna get himself killed again. Does he still owe you money in this timeline?

So here’s my question. Was Shinji actually trying to kill himself bc he thought it might stop his mirror self, or did it just look like that bc he was trying to cover up all reflective surfaces and accidentally trapped himself?

They’re all sitting here. I love this. I love the Zi-Ot3. I LOVE THEM.

Geiz is one of those people where, if punching it doesn’t work, he just punches harder.

I feel like this is a perfect example of his personality and fighting style though. Just, like. Go for it. Just tank right on. Like, oh, this guy reflects attacks? Simplest way to deal with that is just sacrifice myself.

Sougo is like ‘I don’t think that’s a good idea’ and thinking it’s theoretical, but Tsukuyomi literally standing w/ this face like ‘no, Sougo, you don’t understand just yet, he absolutely will do this.’

Sougo’s goofy geometry pyjamas. That is all.

Junichiro does the only acceptable movement for describing Woz’s appearance w/ hand motions.

Why is Sougo shocked by this thing? HE SAW IT LAST EPISODE!

I get that Sougo’s distracted, but does have to walk in the middle of the path and where is everyone?

Sougo can’t think and talk to Kuro Woz at the same time. I will admit, dealing w/ Kuro Woz is a bit much, so...

I LOVE THIS SCENE. Kuro Woz is being Kuro Woz, and Sougo just walks away. YES. Force the asshole to walk after you! Do it!

Also pretty sure he’s bullying Kuro Woz again, and I love it.

My first guess is that the reason the Zi-O II Watch wouldn’t activate was that Sougo was doubting himself? Or something like that?

If you are a Woz, you have no sense of personal space.

Elbow him in the stomach, Sougo!

Kuro Woz is... Really not getting it that Sougo’s not interested in that, is he?

Tsukuyomi expressing concern, very valid concern.

Okay, here’s the thing. Even if he’s not saying ‘only I can do it’ exactly, he’s still very much not suggesting Sougo do it. Like, at all. When he actually tries it, he does it. He knows perfectly well he could die doing it. And if he dies, then Tsukuyomi’s on her own trying to prevent Puma Zi-O (Shiro Woz does not count). And besides, if Sougo dies doing it, that’d be sure to prevent Puma Zi-O, right? But even if it’s not explicitly stated, he’s making an active decision to risk his own life rather than Sougo’s. Have I mentioned I love protective Geiz, even lowkey protective Geiz? Bc I DO.

This is like, another reason why I see him as the ‘protector’ sort of point of the triangle that is the Zi-Ot3. That’s just who he is. He’s the tank, the guardian. Even if he’s not quite noticing it right now, he’s absolutely shifting into being willing to die to protect the other two.

Also, it’s kinda another show that, no matter what else happened, he doesn’t really want Shiro Woz’s future, either. Bc he can’t be the ‘saviour’ or anything if he’s dead from this, ya know?

Tsukuyomi’s like ‘I knew it, you bloody idiot!’ and also pointing out that Sougo was against the idea which causes Geiz to have feelings for a moment bc he’s actually touched Sougo doesn’t want him to die, but also CONFLICTED. XD

I love how both Geiz and Sougo have come to the conclusion that if either one of them stand still in one place for a certain amount of time, either Shiro or Kuro Woz respectively will be somewhere in the vicinity and they can just yell. ^^

Also, I love how he seems to almost always have Tsukuyomi w/ him when he talks to him. It’s like he’s decided he needs a chaperone or something. Reasons vary from funny to sad.

So I guess Geiz is asking what Shiro Woz’s future is like. Apparently... It’s the same? So... No new inventions or anything? I dunno, I find this answer suspicious.

Okay. ‘It’s as if time has stopped.’ This line ratchets the suspicious factor up. It seems simple and sensical enough for the online translator to be right about it, so I’m just gonna take this as what the line basically means for now. But... Remember how a lot of the symbolism in this series has been about ‘restarting clocks’ and stuff like that? In the Build arc, Junichiro had that speech bout how you can only restart your own clock, which Sougo reiterated when meeting Heure. Just this past arc, Hiromu’s father’s watch started moving again at the end. Therefore, I hypothesis that ‘time has stopped’ is not actually a good thing and there is something else going on here.

WHO IS GOOGLES? Seriously, was he Geiz’s brother, his friend... Is that even a guy, I can’t really tell, I shouldn’t be assuming... It’s nice to see their dead body again, I guess, but I need more information here, Toei!

That was not the face of a person I trust. Admittedly, at this point, anyone w/ Woz’s face doesn’t have the face of a person I trust.

Okay, not you in real life, Keisuke, you’re a sweetheart.

See, this makes me think we’re not meant to trust Shiro Woz even more. Geiz only seriously tried to kill Sougo when he knew only about the crimes Sougo committed as Puma Zi-O and nothing about him in the present, when he perceived Sougo as moving toward that path, and when he thought he had no choice (Kasshin showing I think made hims start to wonder if it was even possible, but he got some hope again when Sougo was willing to actually give up and had to be pushed back into it etc.). Shinji, however, is not, whether now or in the future, an active or willing participant in these incidents. It’s like a Yummy, twisting innate wishes out of shape. He’s terrified and upset, and may even have been trying to kill himself to make it stop (not sure though bc this is a kids’ show). When Geiz actually considered things, saw Sougo as the person he was at that moment rather than just as Puma Zi-O, he balked at going through with it. Shiro Woz knows perfectly well this guy is innocent. But he doesn’t hesitate at all. Big red flag. Did any of that make sense? I don’t think that made sense.

Also get away from Shinji you bastard. Ren!

I literally spent this whole episode yelling for Ren to come help Shinji.

No, wait. I’m sorry. Ron.

I mean, I guess Geiz, who looks kinda like how I’d imagine a baby Ron might look, is protecting him, so there’s that.

Ron! Come help Shinji! Ron? RON!

Okay, so... Ryuga was an actual thing in Ryuki? I’m so sorry, it’s been so long since I watched Ryuki.

Heure is absolutely getting revenge on Shiro Woz for the car incident and you know what.... Valid.

Honestly... It’s nice to see someone beat Shiro Woz up a bit for once.

Rider Kick interruptus. All the little hiragana digitise out of existence when Sougo pulls him out of it, that’s a nice effect.

Also I feel like that was slowed down, but I dunno. How fast do you move in a Rider Kick?

Dramatic friendship moments in suit for you viewing experience! XD

I love this, though. These two, I feel like are gonna have a sort of dynamic ‘don’t you dare die on me I’m the only one allowed to kill you’ on Geiz’s side and ‘I’m the king and I didn’t give you leave to die’  on Sougo’s side. XD Like, not necessarily exactly that, I’m being silly w/ the wording, but you get the point. I hope.

Anyway, Sougo is upset that Geiz was risking his life like that, which results in more feelings.

I feel like it might be an important distinction that he uses the Zi-O II Ride Watch not purely in order to gain power and become king or whatever, but in order to save people--most specifically, at the particular moment, a rather self-destructive warrior-type friend. Though the preview does indicate it comes a little late... DX

Geiz is embarrassed. I mean, like I said earlier, there’s a level of this that’s basically him making a choice to risk his own life rather than Sougo's... Or even Shiro Woz (I woulda made Shiro Woz do it).

Sougo is like ‘nope, nope, nope, that’s enough of that.’

So Geiz recognises the Watch? Maybe. He wasn’t there when Kuro Woz dropped it off. Tsukuyomi was, though. Did she not know it? Hm.

I managed to pause it when it looks like Geiz is looking at the camera like he’s on the Office bc Sougo’s power up isn’t working. XD

Also, oh my god. Sougo gets pulled into the mirror world, and Geiz’s immediate response is to rush over and try to follow him/pull him out while yelling (well, yelling ‘Zi-O’ we’re not quite to regular name status yet) worriedly. I LOVE THEM.

I’m assuming everything is backwards, but I couldn’t read kanji in the first place so...

Did Okuno drop his voice an octave for Mirror¡Sougo?

Sougo is initially surprised to see another version of himself, then worries that it’s him from three days in the future again.

Mirror¡Sougo is doing this weird head tilt and it’s so hilarious I just... Can’t.

Sougo makes the unfortunate discovery that not all other versions of you that appear are your friend. I’m sorry, sweetie.

Wow, Mirror¡Sougo just straight punched him.

Okay, I know we all saw it in the preview, but... Mirror¡Sougo does this, like... Really weird walk/motion, and... It just. Has to be seen. I’m serious. HE’S FREAKING WINKING.

Sougo is confused.

Okay, I know this is serious, but it literally looks like he pulled the mirror Ride Watch out of his hair.

Mirror Driver has very weird, distorted voice.

Also WHY IS HE HUNCHING LIKE THAT NO SWEETIE THAT’S BAD FOR YOUR SHOULDERS!

Preview: I saw a translation that said ‘I’ll cut the future’ but the online thing here says ‘create’? Personally, I’d prefer create, but it’s probably ‘cut.’ In other news... If they make a mention that defeating Another Ryuga might be the way to get Sougo out of the mirror world, that would raise Geiz’s ‘sacrifice myself to defeat it’ thing to also being sacrificing himself to save Sougo. And. I love it. ^^ XD <3

Anyway, that’s all for now. Digital macaroons for anyone who read all that. And if you don’t like macaroons... Caramels! Digital caramels.

I’m slightly worried about the little ‘what’s your future like’ convo bc it might indicate Shiro Woz is getting his claw sin between my kids, but pretty much everything else was great. Geiz doesn’t seem to even consider suggesting Sougo try the plan, and Sougo’s genuinely upset when Geiz tries to do it, and at the end, Geiz is upset when Sougo disappears into the mirror world. Tsukuyomi tries to mediate, and do so quite well, is the one who clearly is well-aware that Geiz will absolutely go through w/ the sacrificing himself plan and that he needs dissuading. Looks like she’s unable to stop him next eek, though... And, finally the Zi-Ot3 are investigating together again, and frankly, I just LOVE IT.

How about I subject everyone to my new favourite picture again? (It’s not technically spoilers now, there was a version in the preview for next week)

If you could all the ‘XD’s in this post... You get another hardy handshake.

[goldenscript]

for the requests, i really like the idea of a fluffy freelance web designer idea - title would be something like "the cryptography of your heart" (oh god that was greasy nvm) with namjoon?

pairing: kim namjoon | readergenre: slice of life au / tooth-rotting fluffy fluff, youtuber x freelance web designer word count: 1,529 author’s note: the title isn’t stupid at all!!!! i think it’s lovely

How to tell someone I like them, the Google browser reads.

Cluttered around the stark white screen are the search results consisting of endless results for tutorials, articles, and even Pinterest boards about how to go about the perfect confession. While some are witty, tempting even, there are others that actually elicit an abrupt strangled sound from the researcher.

“What do I do?”

“Just tell her,” Jimin tells him dumbfoundedly. The younger man’s expression matches his tone, looking at Namjoon as if this was simply ordering a caramel macchiato from the coffee shop down the street. As if casually telling his client that he likes them and wants to date them and hold their hand and kiss their cheek and take them to his favorite bookstores and listen to their music recommendations and their childhood stories and—! (Well, you get the picture.) But from Jimin’s tone, it is as though telling Y/N is easy. As if it weren’t enough that you were severely out of his league as it is.

In response, he simply frowns.

“What?”

“It’s not that simple…” Namjoon sighs, already knowing what the conversation that will ensue engails afterwards. He decides he would rather nip it in the bud now than listen to the incredulous accusations later. “And before you ask me how it isn’t that simple, then you gotta understand that I’ve never told anyone that I liked them before.”

Jimin blinks, tilting his head to the side. It is the first he has heard of this sort of thing from Namjoon, but then again relationship talk just hasn’t been the hot topic between the two of them. Jimin knows that Namjoon isn’t keen on leaving his apartment unless it’s for coffee and his job, sometimes if he’s forced out by him or Jungkook (on the days that Jungkook isn’t tempted to sit in and tinker with film editing software, of course). It’s strange to consider though.

When Jimin really thinks about Kim Namjoon and his dating life, it hits him how nonexistent it is. He realizes the great deal of lacking that he never once considered, and a sympathetic look glosses over his cherub-like features before contorting in confusion.

“What do you mean you’ve never confessed to anyone before?”

It’s the dreaded question. One that Namjoon feels the anxiety prickle on his nerves as he glances back at the screen, taking mental notes of the successes and failures that have come with confessing to a crush. That is why. He has heard the horror stories, watched them unfold in adolescence, and dreaded suffering from the same fate.

He is no brave man, you know. Laying his heart out on the line is a hefty deed that makes his stomach queasy and his heart the exact replica of mush. Instead of going into any elaborate detail, not that there is a huge amount to talk about in the first place, he simply shakes his head.

“I just haven’t.”

“…Like not even once though?” Jimin tries once more, wanting to comprehend this statement. Surely, Namjoon had done this at least once.

“Really, I haven’t,” he repeats, looking a little more distraught. He is so new to the idea of romantic love that it’s actually kind of debilitating. And he knows he likes you a whole fuckton. When he thinks about going over to a café to work on your website with you, he can’t help but feel butterflies flutter in his stomach. When he hears about your day, he wants to keep hearing you talk. And god, when you ask him about his and about what he likes and dislikes, it’s… different. In the best way possible. “It never occurred to me that I should. At least until now.”

“You really like Y/N that much?” Jimin muses, eyes flickering to Namjoon’s second screen where your website is pulled up.

Namjoon nods, “A fuckton.”

“She’s supposed to double-check your code before it goes up right?”

Namjoon nods slowly, trying to comprehend. Of course, he’s quick to answer, “I mean she has another comp-sci friend to check it for her though.”

“But she’d still look it over too, right?”

“Yeah, she can be pretty anal about that stuff.”

Jimin giggles, earning a glare from Namjoon as he asks, “So, what are you getting at, pervert?”

“I’m not a pervert!” Jimin pouts, though Namjoon can tell he’s still trying to stop his quivering lip. “But why don’t you just confess to her in the code?”

Namjoon’s jaw drops, “You’re shitting me right? That’s so cheesy…”

“Well, do you have anything better? Can you go up to her and actually her to her face that you like her?”

“Well… no.”

“Then? What else do you have to lose?”

Namjoon considers Jimin’s words as carefully as problem sets from Professor Lim, knowing that despite all his certainties, some attempts are still a hit-or-miss. He knows that whatever happens, happens. He either takes that leap of faith or stays by the ledge, wondering what-if.

His gaze flickers up to the second monitor right then.

He sees your smile etched in between the little symbols, the memories of conversations spent just deciding on a color theme, and a hope that maybe you saw something in him through all that time too.

And with that, he comes to a decision.

“Might as well just leap. It might hurt less.”

/

“Check your code.”

You blink at Yoongi, almost alarmed at the sudden drawl of his voice. As soon as you got the green light from Namjoon, you had Yoongi come over to look it over for one more final look and you’re not sure how to feel about the blond’s curving lips. “What? Why?”

His brief amusement melts away as soon as he clicks his tongue at you.

“It’s a rule of thumb to always check your code, dipshit.”

“You say this like I was the one who created it. I hired someone to do it, y’know. And, I’m having you check it. For free. Like the good friend that you are.”

He rolls his eyes, “Yeah, well, still. Check it.”

“Is there something I should know about?” you ask, wondering if somehow Namjoon made a mistake. Is that why he made you pay less than the estimated amount? You frown at the thought, wondering if maybe he was having an off day the last time you both finalized the code. Though if you’re being quite honest you do know you’re going to miss meeting up with him.

“Er… well, I’ll let you be the judge of that—it’s definitely something you needa check out though.”

You even receive a shake of the head, a deflection that doesn’t go unnoticed, earning your long-time friend a small glare before you change tabs from YouTube to your website’s url. It piques your interest knowing that maybe this might be another reason to see that adorable chestnut-haired man again.

“Alright, fine.”

You scroll to the lines where Yoongi instructs you in the Python program.

‘’’

Hi Y/N. I’m sure you won’t overlook this message, and I’ll understand completely if you decide to delete out or if you never talk to me again, but that last day we spent together I wanted to tell you a lot of things. I wanted to know more about you. Not just from your videos, but from you. The real behind-the-scenes. I think about it a lot. I think about you a lot. Um… God. This is my first time so have a little mercy, okay? I like you. A lot.I’d like to take you out for an espresso. Wait. You hate those. What about brunch at  flâneur? I hear it’s great. I honestly don’t how this works, really, so if this goes completely wrong, please put all blame on Park Jimin, a dance major at Seoul University. Anyway…. um, good luck! (God, please tell me if I just fucked up my first confession, ever, because I could take all the pointers I can get.)

‘’’

A smile curves on your lips when you look at Yoongi, who only snickers at you.

“I told you so, dipshit.”

/

A ding emits from his nightstand.

Namjoon has to hold his breath, wondering if maybe it was another message from Jimin asking if you talked him about what he left for you in the code. He admits it was pretty lame and stupid, but was there really another way? Could he really face you without being tongue-tied and pink in the cheeks? His visages contort in embarrassment at the thought, releasing a deep sigh before unlocking the phone without a second thought.

[11:34 AM] y/n interesting final touches on the code. I have to say I accept. I think flâneur is perfect. how does today at 2 sound?

[11:34 AM] y/n btw, no pointers or pointed fingers needed. it was pretty perfect already

He grins to himself, unable to contain his cries of joy or the flopping of his limbs. The sun is bright and the day is so fucking beautiful.

He tells you that it’s perfect and that he can’t wait.

The leap isn’t so bad after all.

[maxxfields]

With a Twist

Max had googled probably a dozen different times ideas for dates. All of them seemed cringy and pathetic, but he knew that he had to do something different than his usual bullshit with Gabby. He didn’t want to just take her out to fancy shows or fancy meals cause even though she deserved that, it was shallow. It was something he had done for all the women he had tried to sleep with before, back when he didn’t really know them and just wanted to impress them. But now he knew the girl he was sleeping with, and exactly how to impress her. Knowing her made the whole act of dating somehow easier and worse at the same time. He was in unknown territory now, wanting to actually try to plan a date. Hince the embarrassing amount of googling he had done.

Finally it was Friday, the day he had told her to free her schedule for. She wasn’t expecting much and he knew it, normally they had just hung out at either’s places, eat, drank, and vent about their busy weeks. Now that she was in the field and since he worked in news, their hours sometimes missed each other and so it was hard to see each other. Sure they communicated through texts and short calls through the week, but he did miss spending actual time with her. Both of them did try to make sure one night a week they cleared their schedule to do something together. Even if they were so tired from their work weeks that it was just sitting around in each other’s company. But tonight he wanted to try, and try he did.

“So where are we going?” She asked as they sat in his car heading out of her complex. Both were dressed in something simple, she had asked dress code earlier. He knew that telling her something casual had thrown her off already, considering his normal date ideas. “You really don’t know what surprise means do you?” he said rolling his eyes. Their mocking hadn’t stopped at all when they started dating, only changed. She sat in her chair and huffed at him while he cracked a smile. Eventually they got to where they were going and she started laughing. 

“I never thought you would want to do this?”

“I don’t. But I assumed this would be something you would want to do.” He shrugged, and continued with a more hushed voice, “Maybe it’ll be assuming.”

The couple got into the building, and signed in for their reservation. Hearing the word reservation earned him a chuckle and cocked eyebrow in his direction. But they sat down at their stations next to each other and were offered their first glass of wine.

“I did a lot of googling of these places. This is the only one that included unlimited wine.”

“Have I ever told you I love you?”

He laughed again at her and in a moment of rarity, reached over and grabbed her hand before bringing it to his lips and kissing it. They weren’t big on affection, especially in public. But there were moments where his cold, dead heart became warm because of something she did and he would act on it. 

Tonight they were being instructed how to paint a sunset, while servers made sure their wine glasses were never empty. Halfway through Gabby had become very giggling, and he was blushing in her direction regularly. She looked like she was having the time of her life and it honestly made everything worth it. In his head, he decided later he was going to break down the moments of his life that lead him to being the sap he was today.

When the class was done, and the wine had been drank he finally looked at both of their works side by side. The man hadn’t drank much, being too much of a perfectionist and starred at his painting. Sure it looked identical to the one the instructor had done, but it lacked all the emotion that art was suppose to have. But hey, he wasn’t an artist. When he looked over at her, it was a mess. But the most beautiful thing he had seen. Her colors were everywhere in a way that made the sunset look so much more than it the instructors. And she just sat there smiling at it. He went to grab hers and she slapped his hand away, “Hey that’s mine!” 

“Yes, and I am hanging it in MY kitchen.” 

“No you aren’t! I worked hard on that its going in MY kitchen.” 

“Yea well I technically paid for it so its going in mine!” “

“Well if we are going based off who bought something, then I’m taking back that bottle of whiskey I got you for your birthday.”

This shut the man up and he huffed out the word fine. She giggled at him and their banter before standing up and kissing his cheek.

“Thank you Maxipad, this was a lot of fun.”

He smiled down at the girl he was in love with, “You’re welcome. Let’s go home and hang your picture up.”

[thelegaciesbuilt-blog]

This is for task number 1 on thelegacieshqs. This task was designed to find out the best time for your writing is and just learn more about your writing style. These tasks aren’t manditory unless it says so in the description of the task but it is always fun to do them when you have a moment. One can go back and redo some tasks as well (the writing prompts) as many times as they want for any of the characters they want. 

what’s a grammar rule you find yourself breaking or ignoring a lot? A lot of them!  I tend to ignore ain't (ain’t isn’t a word) a lot, starting a sentence with because is another one I forget often.

are there any languages besides english in which you think you could comfortably roleplay? Only know English but I really wish I could write in Italian and speak it because it is beautiful and a  family member knew it but that died with them. English is comfortable and only language I know so sadly I am unable to write in another

how often do you reach for a synonym dictionary when writing? how about mentally? I often reach for it because my brain seems ti forget basic words (Day before yesterday, I couldn’t spell decide right and it looked wrong to me even when it was spelled right). I am always looking to improve my writing

how often do you need to translate your own or the other’s writing with a dictionary or google when writing and reading replies? Often enough and sadly sometimes it is my own writing that needs to be googlged. I use google for words that I am blanking on.

do you listen to music while you write? Yes! I listen to a lot of 1. sexual music 2. rap (that I can’t understand at all) 3. country music 4. pop music. If I am not listening to music, I am listening to my tv (But that turns out to be a bad idea in the end because I get distracted more than music does).

do you have ideal writing circumstances when you can do a lot of drafts or tackle really long ones very easily? Writing laying in my bed (If my hips hurt too much to sit up which sadly that has been happening a lot lately) with my dog curled up at my feet or side. Long replies (four paragraphs and above) can be really easy for me at times and I do prefer them to short ones but they also end up sometimes being the ones to stay in my drafts a lot time because if i have no muse for it, it isn’t getting done (On my indie)

are you a morning, day, evening, or night writer? night writer! I tend to get a lot of inspiration right when I settle down to go to bed and then I end up spending an hour longer tackling drafts until my head hurts. I do write replies at all times of the day!

how does tiredness affect your writing? If my vision is blurring and I can’t think a solid sentence ahead of time, the reply becomes sloppy and I am embarrassed to post it but I normally do just to get it out of my drafts. But on the flip side? Sometimes I write the best writing that I love when I am so tired that I just can't think straight for more than a minute.

have you ever written a serious reply intoxicated? No. I can honestly say I haven’t 

how much do you proof-read as you are writing vs. proof-read at the end? Sometimes I don’t proof-read at all? If I am in a hurry there is none at all but I tend to do a little bit of both any other time.

when you are writing a reply, how much ahead in the thread do you plan? Sometimes I plan ten steps ahead for my character other times I stay in the moment. Emotional replies, I want to stay in the moment to stay natural.

is there ever been a time when you’ve had to drop a roleplaying partner because you’ve found their writing style exhausting? I have done it a few times in the indie world. If I am putting in more effort than my partner (One liners to a reply we started that was three paragraphs) or something, I tend to drop but in groups, I stick with it because it is the right thing to do. You join a group to be active with all members and not just some.

does writing roleplay things in public spaces make you uncomfortable? I don’t really rp out and about. I am at someone’s house or my own when I do it.

what do you do after you see a person has replied? do you read it immediately, or do you wait for it to show up on the dash? do you like it, draft it immediately, etc? I will draft it immediately and then read it (generally)

how often do you need to change the icon in your reply while or after writing the reply? Once or twice in some replies, not often but I do spend a lot of time looking for the ‘right’ icon/gif for my replies

do you first get in the “zone” when writing, or do you start writing and “enter” it that way? I tend to enter the zone when I write and not just be in it when I start.

what is your biggest obstacle to writing every day, if time doesn’t count? Muse in general? If I don’t have muse for drafts, chances are I don’t rp that day. If I am lacking muse for one thread I was looking forward to getting, I spend a while sulking. I also have to say pain (Physical) can keep me offline for a while and that is an obstacle for sure.

how many drafts is a paralysing amount? I have had 30 some replies (Do Believe I had that now on my indie) and that is an amount that has me looking at the number and just freezing up. It gets that way when 1. I don’t say no to an idea that I dislike and would have no muse for 2. I don’t know when to close a thread 3. I have no three. This isn’t in a rp group that this happens though. 

if you are writing a wrong reply that’s not working out, do you save what you have to be continued at another date, or do you scrap it and rewrite? I have done both. I have a talent for writing half a reply, saving and coming back to it and scrapping the whole thing a day later. 

does making icons give or take away energy to write? what about other graphics? Making icons can give me so much muse or none at all. Making gifs does the same thing

longest reply you’ve ever writen on mobile? I have never written an rp reply on mobile before!

what’s your thought process when you format? any unspoken rules you follow? For me, it is always italic the thoughts of my character (so generally when you see italic it is the thoughts going through their mind). I don’t like to do overly formatted text. I have tried for like two replies and couldn’t do it plus I want my text to be readable so just simple small text and a few bolded words if I feel it is needed and italic thoughts is my thing.

[perfectnewgadgets]

You probably don’t need a 4,000-word review to tell you that the Galaxy S9+ is a good phone. Now that everyone’s got all of the Note 7 jokes mostly out of their system, we can mostly agree that Samsung makes good phones. The S8 was great, and the S9 builds on that success in a number of ways.

The new phone is mostly an evolution of its predecessor. There was no great back-to-the-drawing-board moment in its creation. This is not Samsung’s answer to the iPhone X (and really, the Note line already fills that role in a number of ways). It’s true the company may be a victim of its own hype.

The “Phone Reimagined” signs that greeted us ahead of launch in Barcelona were suitably hyperbolic, but for better or worse, that’s the hype cycle we’re living in these days. Samsung claimed to have reinvented the phone this time last year when it showed off the S8’s Infinity Display.

The fact of the matter is that the S9 finds the electronics giant mostly refining things on its flagship. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the phone’s design language. I have the S8+ and S9+ sitting side by side on my desk as I write this, and I’d defy you to tell me which is which without turning over the phones. If you squint, you can see that the bezels are a fraction of a millimeter smaller on the new phone.

Flip them over and you get a better idea of what you’re working with. There are two camera lenses now, aligned in a vertical configuration — and the fingerprint reader has moved down below. The company is continuing to tweak its imaging system and responding to user feedback over little complaints from the last gen. People kept putting their finger on the camera as they fumbled to wake up their phone, so Samsung fixed it.

In spite of what Samsung may tell you, the S9 isn’t a reimagining of anything. It’s a refinement of the leading Android handset. There’s not enough here to compel most S8 owners to upgrade, but if you’re due for a refresh, Samsung’s handset is still the one to beat.

Beyond Infinity

If I was a lazier writer, I’d recommend you read the design section of my S8 review so we could all just skip ahead to the new bits. Still, I’ll try to keep this bit pretty short, because we’ve got a lot of camera to talk about in the paragraphs ahead. The long and short of it is that before the iPhone X, there was the Infinity Display.

It didn’t quite do away with the bezel as we know it, but the design, combined with Samsung’s longtime love of curved glass, brought us right up to the edge. Samsung openly mocked the iPhone X’s notch once again at last week’s unveil. It wasn’t subtle, but then, Samsung rarely is. Apple may have had the last week at MWC when practically every other company happily embraced a notch-filled future.

Until phone companies come up with a better solution to the phone and front-facing camera conundrum (I keep saying “ban selfies,” but no one ever listens to me), it’s either going to be a notch or bezel. Samsung’s dug its heels into the latter, shaving an almost imperceptible amount off its predecessor’s. Perhaps it’s the ultimate sign post of the state of the mobile industry that the world’s largest companies are battling over that reaming few millimeters.

Samsung’s other big Apple mocking moment was a jab at the headphone jack. The iPhone ditched it and never looked back. Perhaps it’s stubbornness that’s kept it on Samsung’s flagships, as many other companies have gone Apple’s route. When I spoke to ZTE ahead of MWC, a rep for the company admitted that the end of the jack is all but an inevitability at this point. But honestly, can you blame Samsung for holding on? After several generations of openly mocking Apple, giving in would be a bit embarrassing.

Of course, that kind of about-face shouldn’t get in the way of moving forward. Remember when Steve Jobs said “no one is going to buy a big phone?” Or heck, when Google made fun of the end of the headphone jack a generation before dropping it? But carrying the S9+ around for the past week reminds me that I still miss the option.

I bought a cheap pair of wired headphones for the plane ride home. There’s still something to be said for the simple plug and play capability there. Bluetooth headphones have come a long way in the past couple of years, but dealing with battery issues and the uncertainty of pairing is still a headache. Sometimes you just want to plug in a pair of wired headphones and be done with it.

The back of the phone is glass once again. Because that’s all the rage, and also, it’s a lot easier on wireless charging. Samsung gave us a black one to go with our S8+ plus. The new purple is pretty eye-catching, but beggars can’t be choosers, I guess. And besides, even with Gorilla Glass, I’m going to strongly advice that you think about picking up a case for that $720/$840 phone.

That said, Samsung has made some improvements to the phone’s overall durability. This isn’t the CAT phone, sure, but every little bit helps. The company has reportedly swapped the old aluminum for a stronger variety and made the phone sightly thicker and heavier in the process. But honestly, as with the bezels, you’re really not going to notice the difference.

Camera-ready

[Left: Galaxy S9+, Right: iPhone 8 Plus]

The nice thing about getting the review unit in Barcelona is that I was going to be taking a lot of pictures anyway. The downside is that I became that annoying American tourist who takes smartphone shots of all his meals. I know, I know. But it was for work, I swear.

The reimagined part of the whole “camera, reimagined” bit is improved low-light shooting — a topic that has quickly become the next big battlefield for smartphone makers. And good for them, really. The inability to take half-decent photos in less than ideal settings is a big sticking point for a lot of these companies. Honestly, what percentage of smartphone shots do you take in perfect lighting? A huge percentage of these are snapped in places like bars and restaurants.

For this latest trick, the company actually borrowed from, of all places, its latest flip phone. But since the W2018 is like $2,000 and only available in Asia, you’re going to have to settle for the company’s new variable aperture on the S9. The dual aperture flips between  f/1.5 / f/2.4 — what that means, in the simplest terms, is that it’s able to let more light into the lens in a dark setting. The aperture physically opens up to accomplish this. In fact, if you take a close look at the camera, you can see that change take place.

Shortly after Samsung announced the technology, Sony made mention that it was working a new super-low-light technology. Of course, it will be a while before that comes to the company’s phones — and even longer until it arrives on phones people actually buy. Meantime, the S9 represents a solid upgrade from a phone industry that’s largely neglected low-light shooting.

We happened to have an iPhone 8 Plus and Pixel 2 at our disposal and did some low-light shooting in bars around Barcelona last week (again, research). The Samsung S9+’s results are impressive. It’s not quite night and day — but it’s close. The S9 lets in considerably more light and is capable of taking decent pictures in settings that utterly stumped the competition.

Scrolling back through the photos taken last week it’s hard to tell which were snapped in a dim bar — though, in some cases, the white balance does seem a bit off. Even so, the improved camera goes a long a way toward reducing the noise you get in the same setting on most phones. If this means fewer people will be firing up their camera flash in bars, I think we all can agree that this is a win-win.

The other big physical improvement on the camera side was borrowed from another one of Samsung’s phones: the Note 8. One of the key differences between the S9 and S9+ that justifies that $140 price gulf is the inclusion of a second telephoto lens in addition to the standard wide-angle. As with that handset, zoom in enough and it switches over to the second lens.

The difference between digital and optical zoom is huge, and this will go a long way toward improving the quality on those tight shots. That’s probably not enough to warrant the upgrade to the S9+ alone, but it goes a long way toward giving the Galaxy one of the best imaging experiences in all of smartphones. There’s a reason the handset just topped DxOMark’s camera ratings.

Is creepy an emotion?

The camera’s most practical improvements are on the hardware side. But the software upgrades bring a lot more proverbial flash. Take AR Emojis. Given how much the S9 looks like its predecessor, it’s easy to see why the company has leaned so heavily on the new feature in its messaging. That said, I’m not entirely sure that’s the best idea. AR Emojis are creepy. I said it before, and I’ll say it again. It’s the first thing I thought when I saw them, and after spending a week with the phone, my opinions haven’t changed.

Samsung got knocked a bit here for cribbing the feature from Apple. The Animoji comparisons were inevitable. And, indeed, all phone makers “borrow” from one another. Welcome to consumer electronics. Of course, Samsung’s put its own unique spin on the feature, and therein lies the creepiness. Take a selfie, and the company builds a customized emoji, using 100 facial data points.

From there, you customize the hair, clothing and add glasses if you wear them. The selections are still pretty limited on that front, but I’d expect Samsung will add more as it goes along. Once you’re all good and saved, the system automically generates nearly 20 animated GIFs representing various Anime-style emotional states, intended to be shared over social media. I don’t see myself ever using them un-ironically, but then I’ve come to accept when I’m not the target demographic for a thing.

It’s kind of like Nintendo’s Mii — if they suddenly decided to be less cute and set up shop smack in the middle of the uncanny valley. It’s an admirable idea, using the company’s camera technology to create something more customized than the 16 Apple currently offers. But for one thing, the scans don’t offer enough distinction from person to person. And for another, I’m not sure machines can be relied upon to combine real-world 3D imagery and cartoons into something not creepy. Listen, we’ve all seen Blade Runner here. Robots are creepy.

There are other default emojis — a rabbit, a cat and a weird box-headed monster thingy. None match Apple’s offerings for general adorableness, but I wouldn’t worry too much for Samsung. The company scored a major coup by striking a deal with Disney, in spite of the company’s longtime alliance (and board member swapping) with Apple.

Along with the Star Wars AR it brought to the Pixel 2, Disney seems to be trying hard not to play favorites. That will ultimately mean great things for AR Emoji adoption, assuming, of course, that they’re implemented in a less creepy way than its current offering. I’ve got faith in Disney’s tight grip on intellectual property — they’ll likely look good, which will ultimately mean users will continue to engage with the tech after the purchase of the phone.

There’s no date on arrival, but the offering will include Mickey and Minnie, along with some Pixar names. The Incredibles flashed on the screen — no surprise, given that a sequel is due out in July. It’s a nice marketing play for Disney, leveraging the flagship from the world’s largest phone maker.

Hopefully the company won’t regret it too much when online videos with the company’s iconic mouse saying truly filthy things surface on social media immediately after launch. I’m not saying I’m looking forward to it, I’m just saying that I’ve learned to expect the absolute worst from my fellow humans.

Taking it slow

Sony took another not so subtle dig at its press conference, noting that it had Super Slow Motion on its phones a year before Samsung. But again, the key differentiator here is the fact that people actually, you know, buy Samsung phones. As such, this is the first time a lot of people are going to get their hands on the technology.

During a briefing, Samsung compared the tech to The Matrix’s “bullet time.” This is not that, of course. For one thing, it’s just the one camera. But it is, in fact, very neat. Honestly, it’s the most fun I had testing the phone out over the past week. Like any good new camera toy, it makes you hyper aware of your surroundings as you look for little things in life that might look cool, slowed down.

The new tech is a pretty radical update over Samsung’s earlier slow motion, bumping it from 240 to 960 frames per second. That’s 32 times slower than regular footage and four times slower than standard slow motion. You’ll invariably find yourself shooting all sorts of weird mundanity you wouldn’t think to video in a million years at regular speed: water pouring into a glass, pigeons on the street. It’s a good way to instantly look like a weirdo to strangers, but screw ’em, it’s for science.

By default, the feature sports a small square in the middle that automatically fires up Super Slow Motion when it detects action. Results will vary in that bit, depending on a number of factors, including how far away the action is. It’s nice to have the setting to fall back on, so you can keep the phone steady with two hands, but more often than not, I found myself just doing it manually.

Once shot, the phone packages the video nicely, creating three separate looping GIFs and adding royalty free music to the main video. Honestly, though, they all end up looking super moody and I just want to add that “Mad World” cover from Donnie Dark to really complete the package.

The fact that light flickers at certain frequency only adds to the effect. Shooting in Heathrow proved next to impossible under the oppressive airport lights. Low light, on the other hand, was a non-starter. The feature requires a lot of light to work properly, so don’t expect to go shooting any Super Slow Motion in restaurants or bars.

A few other features are worth calling out here. Food Mode offers some nice beauty shots of your lunch. I’m generally happy how these turned out, though some of my co-workers found them to be a bit oversaturated. Auto-focus speed has improved, as promised, and stickers are a fun augmented reality addition to the offering.

Hi Bixby

Samsung’s been on something of an AI shopping spree over the past couple of years. Even so, the company’s smart assistant has had a tough time playing catch up to Alexa, Siri and the rest. Even so, Bixby stumbled pretty hard out of the gate. Samsung needed to deliver a compelling reason to choose its offering over Android’s default, Google Assistant. Instead, Bixby was half-baked when it arrived on the S8.

The company’s made some key in-roads since then, including, most notably, the eventual arrival of voice functionality. Certainly Bixby has some grand ambitions, fueled by acquisitions like Viv. But that kind of thing doesn’t amount to a whole lot if your assistant isn’t suited to day-to-day activities.

On that front, Bixby’s still got a lot of growing to do. We sat in a circle at our Airbnb in Barcelona, asking a spate of questions to Bixby, Siri, Assistant and Cortana (TechCrunch knows how to party), and Bixby had trouble competing. In general, those other assistants are better suited to answer simple questions.

I also found myself flipping Bixby’s voice recognition to its highest sensitivity. As the company notes, the more sensitive you make it, the more likely it is to get triggered accidentally, but I found that was the best way to ensure a response.

Of course, Bixby’s much more tightly integrated into the daily Galaxy experience. A right swipe on the home page will bring up the Bixby landing page, which aggregates all sorts of content from the phone, including social media messages, health stats and local offerings from Maps. Of course, this also can be accessed via the devoted Bixby button, which is back for some reason.

The stream’s not particularly useful in and of itself. It’s really not too dissimilar from any number of content aggregation streams countless manufacturers have built into Android in an attempt to differentiate themselves from the competition. It is, however, a handy way of keeping track all of the various third-party apps you’ve integrated into the service. Also, Samsung has thankfully finally unified all of its myriad smart home offerings into a single, easy to use Smart Things app, similar to Apple’s Home offering.

Where the assistant does manage to stand out from the competition (save, in some cases, for Google) is with Bixby Vision. The feature isn’t really fully integrated into Bixby — in fact, it seems more like a branding opportunity than anything for the company. But name aside, it’s a really cool feature with a broad range of applications.

Text was the one I was most looking forward to, wandering the streets of Catalonia. When it’s working perfectly, the phone harnesses Google’s smarts to create an augmented reality translation that lays over real-world text. Really, really neat. The system works with 54 input languages and 150 output.

Live translation is spotty. It understandably takes a bit of time, as it has to send and receive information from the cloud. The text overlays also look a bit like a ransom note, but beggars can’t be choosers for a feature like this. I found the feature to be more miss than hit in augmented reality mode, so ultimately I ended up using the phone to convert signage into text and translate it that way. It’s a longer route, but ultimately a lot more helpful.

The Not Hot Dog-esque Food feature is impressive, as well, identifying food stuffs and giving you a rough approximation that you can add to the Samsung Health app. Like translation, it’s similar to something Google offers up in Lens. There’s also a Makeup feature that overlays eye shadows and lipsticks from companies like Sephora to see what you look like in a new shade.

Both are extremely impressive showcases for technology, but ultimately feel more novel than useful.

Screen time

The S9’s display is the same resolution as its predecessor — a Quad HD 2,960 x 1,440. That works out to 570 PPI on the 5.8-inch S9 and 529 PPI on the 6.2-inch S9+. Attempting to top that resolution is a fool’s errand, but the company that also supplies displays to its chief competition happily made some tweaks to the screen’s color accuracy. The OLED recently took DisplayMate’s top honors, and rightfully so. It’s lovely.

The speakers have been souped up, as well — a welcome addition, given that the feature so often gets short shrift from phone makers. The volume gets much louder, and when you flip the phone into landscape mode, the earpiece doubles as a stereo speaker. Of course, the same disclaimer that you get on all phone speakers is needed here: It’s fine for watching YouTube videos, but you’re going to want some headphones if you plan to listen for any extended period of time.

Thankfully, Samsung’s acquisition of Harman means the phone ships with a pair of AKG earbuds with silicone tips that are way, way more comfortable than Apple’s default pair. And yes, no adapter required.

The phone includes all of its predecessor’s various biometric unlocking options, but adds Intelligent Scan to the mix. The feature combines iris and face scanning into one, defaulting to the best option based on light level. It starts with your face and moves to the eyeballs if the lighting sucks.

It works a lot better than relying on iris alone, but as has been noted, it’s not secure enough to tie to things like mobile payment. And if you’re really concerned with the potential for other people to get into your phone, I’d recommend other methods.

Here in the States, you’ll be getting the Qualcomm Snapdragon 845 — a feature that’s likely behind the company’s decision to announce the phone at Mobile World Congress last week, in order to stay ahead of the competition. Both models ship with 64GB of storage, augmentable via a microSD chip (up to a whopping 400GB). The S9 sports 4GB of RAM and the S9+ bumps that up by 2GB, which should be more than enough power for most users.

Samsung continues to be cautious on the battery front after flying too close to the sun, once upon a time. The S9 sports a 3,000mAh unit, while the S9+’s is 3,500. Not the largest around, but I was able to effectively get nearly two days of use on a single charge for the S9+.

Re-imagineering

As ever, Samsung’s additions are some combination of genuinely useful and some “why not” features. The S9’s got enough small but meaningful tweaks to keep the device at the top of the Android heap, and perhaps best of all, Samsung’s managed to price it at $720/$840 — not cheap by any stretch of the imagination, but considerably less expensive than the iPhone X’s $1,000 price tag.

Bixby still needs a lot of love and those AR Emojis are, to borrow a phrase from my people in Northern California, “hella creepy.” But all of those new software additions are nothing if not ambitious and point to a company trying out some genuinely interesting stuff in spaces like augmented reality. They’re not all hits, but they’re never not interesting.

As far as upgrading from the S8 — unless you’ve found yourself in some sort of Brewster’s Millions-style scenario where you suddenly have to part with a lot of cash with comedic consequences, I’m going to say hold off on that one. For everyone else ready to upgrade to a shiny new Android handset, however, the S9 maintains Samsung’s spot at the top of the heap.

First published on Source

Samsung Galaxy S9+ review – TechCrunch You probably don’t need a 4,000-word review to tell you that the Galaxy S9+ is a good phone.

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HUGE Mistakes I Made My First Year Blogging

This post contains affiliate links. This means I receive a small commission (at no extra cost to you) if you purchase using them. Please read my Disclaimer Policy for more information.

Are you feeling frustrated, tired, confused with tech overwhelm, and getting absolutely nowhere? I’ve been exactly where you are right now. That is how I spent my first year of blogging. Yelling at the computer, googling problems that no one else seemed to be experiencing, and feeling completely lost.

Are you struggling to come up with content? Or do you find yourself creating great pieces of content that you KNOW someone would benefit from, but your words are falling on deaf ears? Been there too.

Blogging is simple, yet complicated. You hear about all these people who are making thousands of dollars per month blogging and getting millions subscribers, yet no one seems to want to share HOW they’ve made their success.

That’s what I thought too until I found Create and Go with Alex Nerney and Lauren McManus.

After completing their course, relaunching my blog, and finally getting traffic on Pinterest, I found out EXACTLY what I was doing wrong on The Enchanted Aunt.

To prevent you from making the same mistakes that I did my first year blogging, I thought it would be helpful to share with you exactly what I did wrong. Stop what you’re doing now and read through this massive list of mistakes. Create a successful blog and build something from nothing by learning what NOT to do.

Here are the HUGE mistakes I made my first year blogging.

1.) I went with a free theme

Everyone wants something for nothing right? I did too. I wasn’t ready to take blogging seriously at first. Actually, I wanted to take it seriously but at the lowest possible cost. 

What cost does that sound like? FREE!

What was the outcome? Frustration!

Here’s the thing about free themes. They’re great if you want to blog for as a hobby, but they’re not a good idea if you want to create a blog that’s fully customizable and that operates with the greatest amount of ease.

Say I just gave you a house, no holds barred. This is your house to raise your family in, rest your head at night, and to do with it as you please. Sounds great, right? A house for free?

What’s the catch? It was built 80 years ago, the appliances aren’t up to code and could catch fire at any time, and the taxes haven’t be paid on it in the last 10 years.

That’s an extreme example of what it’s like to operate your blog with a free theme. Unless you know how to code and fix problems to get things up to speed with current technology, free isn’t always the way to go. Rather than solving your problem, it leads to more headaches.

You won’t find much support on how to customize them because no one wants to work for free. Trust me, I looked.

The solution?

I ditched my free theme. After reading about different themes and asking other bloggers, I decided to go with Divi from Elegant Themes. It was the one that was the most popular because of how easy it was to use. I was told it’s very customizable and that you don’t need to know coding. They weren’t wrong. That’s exactly what it is.

Not only is it extremely easy to use, but it also comes with a lot of support from it’s developers. Support is exactly what I needed in the beginning.

2.) I tried learning how to blog from Google

Google is great for getting answers to very specific questions. However, what I wanted was broader. Asking google how to start a blog gave me the very basics on how to blog like creating a domain, setting up hosting, and picking a platform to create the blog on. That’s not what I needed because I already had all of that. What I needed was a teacher to show me how to create a decent looking blog and get people to read it.

There’s a lot that goes into building a blog and so Google wasn’t giving me what I needed this time. I’d find one helpful article which then led me to google other things and so on and so on. Around and around I went looking for answers. It wasn’t the best approach.

3.) I turned to Udemy for mentors

Since Google wasn’t cutting it, I took another cheap approach by buying a $30 course on Udemy for how to start a blog.

It sounded great since they were offering the course at such a low discount, but the results didn’t yield the same effect. I will say that I did learn from the instructor on the basics of the backend of blogging. However, a lot of his information was outdated.

The trouble with buying deeply discounted courses and turning to YouTube and Google is that the information isn’t necessarily up to date. Also, though I had an instructor walking me through the steps, there wasn’t a place where I could raise my hand and ask a question about something that he just went over.

Dare I say I got what I paid for?

4.) I used Facebook for traffic

This is where everyone gets all of their information from nowadays right? So since I got just enough information from Google and Udemy that I could start blogging, I did just that.

I’d write a post, post it on Facebook, and it would be seen by maybe 4 people. If I didn’t post it at a time when people were most active, it wouldn’t show up in anyone’s feed. Also, it’s a one and done situation. Since Facebook isn’t a search engine, people weren’t looking for the content I was creating.

The other option was to take out ads. However, there’s a lot that goes into that and I knew I’d be wasting my money if I just set a budget and entered my credit card number. So that option was off the table too.

Facebook is not the best place to share content because of how the algorithm is set up. Sure, it’s a good idea to share your content with friends and family. Don’t stop doing that! However, even today, of the 2,000+ (and growing) visitors I get each month, 44 were sent there because of Facebook.

The Solution?

Where do I get nearly all of my traffic from? Pinterest. I used the system laid out in the Pinterest Traffic Avalanche course from Create and Go. They taught me the basics of Pinterest SEO, and I applied their methods to my blog and got results! The BEST thing about their course is it’s UPDATED constantly to reflect the new changes in the algorithms.

5.) I was soooo slow

There was very little content on my blog during the first year. I struggled to find the time to sit down and write. On top of that, once I did create a schedule for myself, I’d overthink everything and got nowhere. I was averaging one post per month. It was taking me that long just to think of, create, and edit content.

Don’t be me. If you want to get results, throw perfection out the window and just start writing. The only way you’re going to find your voice is if you start using it.

There are plenty of free tools like Grammarly or Yoast that’ll help you with spotting typos and offering insight into the readability ease. It’s possible to make mistakes even with these tools, but that’s okay. If can always go back and correct your errors. You’re human. It happens.

6.) I had 0 confidence in myself

Since I had been blogging for a few months and wasn’t seeing results, I was deflated. I didn’t think that anyone cared about what I had to say.

Also, I was embarrassed by the look of my blog. Do you want people to come to your house when it looks like you haven’t lifted a finger to maintain it? That’s how I felt about my blog. My free theme was preventing me from having a clean layout. It was scattered and ugly.

7.) I made it about ME instead of about my audience

I honestly didn’t know why people blogged in the first place. My original thoughts were that it was an online journal for people to cry into. I was wrong.

Tons of people told me to start blogging because I wanted to launch an online product. So I started out by just telling stories about my life as an Aunt because that was my only expertise. However, no one cared about my stories. Like most people, they wanted to know HOW to do something. They wanted to know how to achieve the same results. I was missing my mark.

People read blogs because they’re looking for help. They want to learn from others that are in the same spot as them. If you know a lot about a topic, you could become an expert in that field just from your blog.

8.) I didn’t invest in a course

I did buy the $30 Udemy course, but I don’t think it really counts. I’m not saying that because of the price. However, I am saying it because of how thin the material in it was. It was the bare bones of what you needed to know about blogging. I had something, but I didn’t know how to use it.

I also relied a lot on YouTube, which I love but it was the Swiss cheese of blogging tips. There’s a lot of hole in the content out there.

9.) I didn’t trust anyone’s advice

I kept trying new things that I was hearing from other people on YouTube and from reading other people’s blogs on blogging, but it was a lot of fluff. No one was being flat out honest about results. No one took screenshots of their success. There were just too many scam artists out there to really trust anything. It led me not to trust.

However, I found Alex and Lauren’s YouTube Channel about a year into blogging and that’s when I started making real changes. They earned my trust through their transparency. The information that they put out there spoke to me. I found that I could learn from the people that were actually in my spot at one point. That’s why I ultimately invested in their Six figure blogging course.

10.) I didn’t use Pinterest the way it’s intended.

After I had watched a few of Alex’s YouTube videos on Pinterset I thought that I knew all there was to know about Pinterest. Boy, was I wrong.

I didn’t know about the importance of SEO on Pinterest, what group boards were, or why it was so important to continually create and share other people’s content.

I was getting some readers from Pinterest. In fact, nearly all of them came from there, but it was only 1-10 per day. There’s a lot that goes into building a following. You can read my view of Pinterest Traffic Avalanche to learn more.

11.) I compared myself to EVERYONE

Since I was learning from others, I was comparing myself to others. Don’t do that.

It’s important to remember that everyone starts at the bottom and knows nothing, but eventually you find your way. Comparing your results to a veteran blogger won’t lead to success. You’ll start to get frustrated that you’re not already where they are 1 week into blogging.

12. I didn’t treat it like a business

A business needs to be tended to. It needs to be worked out continuously in order to get ahead. Success doesn’t happen overnight. And if it does, it’s because hard work was put into which lead to that turning point. You can’t publish one post, insert one affiliate link, and think you’ll see any results.

You have to shift your mindset and treat your blog like it’s a living thing in order for it to grow and prosper. You have experiment with different content, wait for results, analyze your efforts, and make adjustments accordingly. Hardly anyone gets it right the first time.

Even though I know now that the choices that I was making were mistakes, I still learned a lot in the process. Yes, I could have saved myself a lot of time and energy if I had just invested in a course earlier, but I realize that the knowledge that I acquired from my mistakes will help someone else.

If you fall into any of the following categories:

Want to start a blog but don’t know what to blog about

Want to start a blog but don’t have any technical experience

Have already started blogging, but are struggling with traffic

Have traffic, but are looking to build a greater audience

Have a great blog, good traffic, but aren’t sure how to monetize

Have a successful blog, but don’t know how to create and sell your own products

You should invest in one of the many courses from Create and Go.

With the help of Lauren and Alex, I have successfully rebuilt and relaunched my blog, started gaining significant traffic, viewership and subscribers, made affiliate sales, and now I’m onto relaunching my own product with them.

I realize that I could have gotten to where I am now faster had I invested in the beginning, but hopefully, my mistakes will help you build, launch, and monetize your blog faster and with greater ease.

I am now an affiliate for them not because I earn a small commission (at NO extra cost to you), but because they have truly helped me. Much like you, I was struggling to move forward and spread my messages, but after completing their courses, I have grown tremendously in a very short period of time.

Please feel free to reach out to me if there are any additional questions. about my experience with Create and Go.

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Survey #291

“clothes trailing from the backdoor, to the bedroom, and i don’t even know your name.”

What was the last health scare you had? So I got blood tests done recently to check multiple things, and I got pretty nervous when my doctor stood beside me going through the numbers and what they meant. I was afraid she was going to tell me I had diabetes (runs in the fam, and my diet hadn't been great) or something, but I was fine. What is your favorite food to cook? Something in the microwave lmao. Do you listen to bluegrass music? Ew. What was the last novel you read about? Well it' s part of a series so it'd be hard to explain briefly... but dragons. That'll do ig, lol. If there is a tree right outside your window, what kind is it? There's a small one. Idk what it is. What is your favorite filling for a piece of chocolate? Caramel. What is your favorite thing to draw? If you take a look at my work history... I apparently love drawing meerkats screaming for one reason or another lmao. Do you like abstract art? Not very much. There are of course exceptions to this, but it's definitely not my favorite and sometimes doesn't even feel like "art" to me. Would you ever want to be a painter? No. My Painting course in school taught me it's too damn stressful, the idea of messing up. Even though it's technically fixable. There's just a lot about painting I don't like. I'd much rather draw and color traditionally. What is your passion? Some of my biggest consists of gay rights (or really just equal rights as a whole), meerkats, pacifism, photography, just art in general, stuff like that. I feel things very deeply, so there's really a lot. What fascinates you? NATURE!!!!!!! SO MUCH ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Do you have art on your walls? In my room, I have three of my meerkat projects on the wall with my meerkat collection, and my Pyramid Head/Halo of the Sun overlap drawing is with my Silent Hill stuff. What kind of collection would you like to start? I have a decent amount of stuff, but I really would love to pump up my SH collection. It has SO much merch that I would die for, stuff is just mad expensive. If I was to start a new collection, bitch I need Markiplier stuff so bad, I'm too awkward to ask for that shit for holidays 'n stuff. ;;_;; Do you enjoy the sound of birds chirping? I sure do. If you had the money, would you travel the world? I feel like I'd go to less locations than most people you could ask this question, but I'd definitely go places, yeah. If you could travel the world, which country would you want to go to first? South Africa. Make my meerkat dreams come true. :') Do you get drunk? I haven't before, and I don't actually aim to when I drink (which is very rare) and I'm apparently no lightweight, so I doubt I ever will. Don't feel like I'm missing out, honestly. Do you get high? Nah. Have you ever used a prescription medication to get high? No. Does sunlight make you happier? Guys. This is science. I used to hate the sun so much, but it's good for you. Open your windows on a clear day; your body will thank you. It takes getting used to, but please, don't coop yourself up in the dark. Do you live a boring life? My life is excruciatingly boring. Like not to sound depressing, but half the time I wish I wasn't even alive because I'm so bored lmao. Have you ever gotten soap in your mouth for cursing? Do you think that’s right to do to kids who curse? No, but it's been threatened upon me. I don't support it, no, but then again I don't believe in traditional "profanity." My hypothetical four-year-old could say "that fucking hurt" in our own household, and just a simple word indicating (s)he was really in pain wouldn't faze me for a blink. I do believe out of respect though, that you should educate your children when "profanity" isn't allowed, like in school and such. You don't shove potentially toxic shit into your kid's mouth to teach them something. What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start watching horror movies with lots of gore? This definitely depends on the child. Are they spooked easily? How mature are they? Do they understand what's not to be replicated? It would vary with the film, too. Do you have any wind chimes outside your house? How many? No, but I'd love to. Wind chimes are great. Do you have a flat stomach? Would you ever wear a belly shirt to show it off? I hate my stomach more than I do any other part of my body, so guess. Would you ever get a sleeve or a half sleeve on your arm (we’re talking about tattoos)? omfg hell YES Do you think your biological parents love each other? They're long-divorced and Dad's been remarried for a long time while Mom only has negative shit to say about him, so like... What's one movie you’re dying to see but haven’t had the chance to see yet? *Dying* to, I don't know if one exists. Birds of Prey probably tops my want-to-see list, though. Harley moving past Joker? Girl you fuckin go ilu. What’s the biggest promise someone’s ever made to you? Did they keep it? To never leave me because of my illnesses. Nope, he sure didn't. Does thunder & storms scare you? Nah, not usually. It's funny, I was TERRIFIED of them as a kid, especially if I wasn't with my mom, but now I find them beautiful and sometimes even relaxing. Now, wind, I fucking hate wind. I associate bad winds with tornadoes, so fuck outta here w/ that. Google, Bing, or Yahoo? Google. Do you sing in front of people? NO. Who are you the most uncomfortable around? Groups of older men. Are your parents overprotective? No. A recent creation that you’re proud of? I took family pictures for a repeat client recently, and I'm really happy with how some came out. Who’s your favorite comedian? Living, I'm unsure. It was John Pinette. What makes you squeamish? Vomit and fecal matter top the list. Do you have any online friends that you wanna keep, but not meet? Maybe a couple that I don't know too well? Should cloning ever be allowed to happen? No. I see a lot of potential problems with that should it become a serious thing. Who would you live with if you got kicked out tomorrow? Probably my dad. What’s a pet your parents never let you have when you were a kid? A snake. I was eventually allowed though obviously, and now Mom loves Venus, though she won't hold her. Who do you wish you could change, if anyone? It's not my job to change anyone else. You have to want to change. Has your house ever been broken into? No, but my childhood home almost was by a gang. My older sister and her best friend were home alone at the time. Thank fuck they didn't get in, but they left a gang flag on our porch. Would you consider yourself a good flirt? I have no idea. What color do you wear most often? You mean to tell me black isn't the only primary color in people's wardrobes? Do you like your hair? Disregarding the fact it gets oily way too fast, yes. Have you ever driven while under the influence? No, I would absolutely never. Did you enjoy your last kiss? Yeah. Would you ever take boudoir photos for a significant other? (or have you?) Considering I literally love boudoir, I would if I didn't hate the fuck outta my body and would be too embarrassed to ever do it. What is your biggest guilty pleasure? Maybe makeup guru channels lmaooo. What is a movie that you thought you would hate but actually ending up enjoying? I'm unsure. I don't really go into watching a movie I think I'll hate, especially when I watch so few movies to begin with. Do you like where you live? I'm not a fan of the suburbs, but it's a better place than where we were. Are you a jealous person? I'm learning that apparently I might be, at least sometimes. Is there anyone you want to fix things with? There are a few. Last time you walked further than a block? I couldn't tell you. I walk a few feet (that's not an exaggeration) and am in pain because of the muscle atrophy in my legs. Is it easy for you to accept loss? NO. NUH-UH. NOPE. Do you get dessert normally while out to eat? No. Who was your first kiss? Jason, my first "real" boyfriend. Have you ever found a stray dog & found its owners? Not that I recall. Would you ever tell your mom about the things you’ve done sexually? Not everything, no. When was the last time you told someone you love them? Last night. Who was the last person you talked to last night in person before bed? Ma. When was the last time that you were genuinely happy? Good damn question. Have you ever dyed your hair? Plenty of times. Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person you kissed? Yeah. When was the last time you changed in front of someone? I don't know; when you hate your body enough, you'll do a lot to avoid that. Last person you kissed, have you cried in front of them? Yes. Ever dated someone who was gorgeous but they had a conceited personality? No. A conceited asshole is the last kind of person I'm dating. Would you prefer a kiss on the cheek or neck? Well I mean what's the vibe lmao Do you like to cuddle? Yeah, if we're a close couple and it's not too hot. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating on you? Nah. Could you ever be friends with the person who hurt you most in life? I wish we could, but even if he was willing, I don't think "friendship" is possible between us. What is something “cheesy” that you own? Ha, I have this feminine-looking "she believed she could so she did" wall decor thing... I can't remember if I bought it or if it was gifted. What is something that gets your creative juices flowing? MUSIC!!! What drink are you most likely to order at a bar? Some kind of margarita. What is the most interesting class that you took in high school or college? Mythology, I guess? When was the last time that you’ve ever played Spin the Bottle? I never have to begin with. If you were an adult film star or a stripper, what would your stage name be? I can't even try to entertain this question. Even if I WANTED to be one, I would never be hired. I couldn't seriously think of a name. Have you ever wanted to be a cheerleader? No, not even when I was one as a kid lmao. Have you ever been dumped? What was the reason for it? Yeah. The first one, he couldn't handle my depression anymore. With my last partner, we kinda had a mutual agreement that to save us from potential later heartbreak, we needed to work more on ourselves right now. What was the last R-rated movie you watched? Hm. Idk. Have you ever asked someone out? Yes. Have you ever had lice? No. What is the most childish thing that you still do? I mean, with RP, you could argue that I still "play pretend." Have you ever watched a movie you knew you shouldn’t? As a kid, I'm pretty sure I was not supposed to see whatever Scary Movie film it was when I did, aha. Have you ever wanted to try LARP (Live Action Role-Play)? Nah. I'm awkward enough explaining I just write it. If you could go back in time and erase one thing you said or did, what would it be? The "thanks for sending me to the hospital" message to Jason. Has your boyfriend or girlfriend ever embarrassed you? Jason did before, if we're counting past partners. Have you ever thought about cheating on your partner? I never thought of that in any relationship, no. Have you ever been caught checking someone out? Not to my recollection. Not that I even do that much. Have you ever cried because you missed your parents so much? Oh, absofuckinglutely as a little kid. I had BAD separation anxiety from my mom. Have you ever posted something on social media that you regret? OH BOY HAVE I!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever ding dong ditched someone? No. Which is worst: Snakes, scorpions, or spiders? I adore snakes. Some spiders scare me, especially if they catch me by surprise. Scorpions aren't native here, so I've actually never come across one, so I'd probably be more curious than frightened. Is there an attic and/or a basement in your house? An attic, yeah. Have you ever been bitten by a tick? Has anyone not? Well, I suppose this depends on your environment. Playing outside in the country as a kid a lot, and especially walking through tall grass to reach fishing spots with Dad, I've had lots. I'm terrified of parasites so those were never fun times. What color is your mom’s car? White. Have you ever had a bird or a squirrel in your house? No. How high off the ground is your bed? The average, ig. What is the cutest breed of dog? That's such a hard question, but I think I tend to lean towards pugs, though I don't support breeding them or any other type that is a medical catastrophe. What is something other people say you’re good at but you think you’re not? Holding a conversation. I call BS. What does your bedside lamp look like? It's a creamy color with a floral design. It was already here at the house when we moved in. Do you like your neighbors? I don't know them. Does your room need to be cleaned? I need to finish decorating it... and dust the dresser. What was the last bug you saw? Ugh, a fucking ant. This house has had an ant problem before, and now they're showing up in my room here and there. Do you place any value in gender roles? Literally zero. Are your platonic relationships just as valuable as romantic or family ones? Well, I suppose it would depend on the person. How strong is that platonic relationship? Are you in love? Do you want to be? I don't think *in* love anymore, no; I reasoned myself out of that. I think most people WANT to be in the name of companionship, and being a pretty hopeless romantic, your wild guess would probably be right. Would you be happy with a life without romance? I'd live. Are you religious? Do you think your religion is ‘correct’? No. If you aren’t religious, do you wish you were? Why? Nope. Religion only ever brought me confusion, pain, and frustration. Are your choices fated or of your own free will? I am very much a believer in free will and that you sculpt your own fate. Was your childhood happy? For the most part. What are you missing from your life? Excitement. Would you fight for your country? Do you feel a sense of loyalty to your nation? No. And if my country did something fucked up, I wouldn't stand with the masses just because I live here. What’s the latest YouTube channel you’ve discovered and binge-watched? Snake Discovery, like, hardcore. Does it snow where you live? Every now and then, but it's super rare for the snow to stick, and it's maybe even rarer that we get a good or fun amount. Do you think your hair looks better long or short? UGGGGHHHHHH I AM SO MUCH HAPPIER W/ SHORT HAIR. Do you enjoy editing photos on your phone? Not really on my phone, no. I don't have good image quality on my phone, so editing tends to make it worse. What’s your favorite thing to do on your phone? Play Pokemon GO if I'm actually in a place with spawns. Which season do you wish would last longer? Sigh, autumn. At least here, the colorful phase is pretty short. It's like... green leaves one day, a beautiful display for a week, then the trees are bare. It's still my favorite season, though. Do you have neat handwriting? Yeah. Did you dream of becoming famous as a kid? Nah. Do you get on Facebook every day? Pretty much. What was your favorite girl group when you were growing up? Spice Girls, duh. Would you ever consider naming a child after a family member? No. I've got nothing against people who do, but I've just never seen the appeal of it at all. I would want my hypothetical child to have their completely own identity.

[ralphmorgan-blog1]

The Complete Guide to Facebook Privacy

Facebook has never been particularly good at prioritizing your privacy. Your data powers its business, after all. But recent revelations that a firm called Cambridge Analytica harvested the personal information of 50 million unwitting Facebook users in 2015 has created new sense of urgency for those hoping for some modicum of control over their online life. If you ever needed a wake-up call, this is it.

The good news: Despite the repeated, public privacy lapses, Facebook does offer a fairly robust set of tools to control who knows what about you—both on the platform and around the web. The bad news: Facebook doesn't always make those settings easy to find, and they may not all offer the level of protection you want.

Fear not! Below, we'll walk you through the steps you need to take to keep advertisers, third-party apps, strangers, and Facebook itself at bay. And if after all that you still feel overly exposed? We'll show you how to walk away entirely.

Keep Apps in Check

Over the years you've used Facebook, you've probably given various apps permission to tap into its data trove. And why not? At the time it's a simple enough request, a way to share photos more easily, or find friends across the app diaspora.

In doing so, though, you're granting developers deep insight into your Facebook profile. And until Facebook tightened up permissions in 2015, you were also potentially letting them see information about your friends, as well; Cambridge Analytica scored all that data not from a hack, but because the developer of a legitimate quiz app passed it to them.

So! Time to audit which apps you've let creep on your Facebook account, and give the boot to any that don't have a very good reason for being there. That's most of them.

On a desktop—you can do this on mobile as well, but it's more streamlined on a computer—head to the downward-facing arrow in the upper-right corner of your screen, and click Privacy. (You're going to spend a lot of time here today.) Now go to Apps, and gaze upon what your wanton permissions-granting hath wrought.

On this page, you can see a list of apps with access to your Facebook profile information.

OK, so maybe it's not that bad. Or maybe it is! I have friends who discovered well over a dozen apps lurking within the Logged in with Facebook pane; I only have four, but that's because I did some spring cleaning recently. Either way, you can see not only what apps are there, but how much info they're privy to. For instance: I haven't used IFTTT in years, but for some reason it has access to my Friend list, my timeline, my work history, and my birthday.

To revoke any of those permissions, go over and click the pencil. To scrap the app altogether, hit the X. You'll get a pop-up asking if you're sure. Yes, you're sure. Click Remove to make it official.

An important note here: Those developers still have whatever data about you that they've collected up to this point. You have to contact them directly to ask them to delete it, and they're under no obligation to do so. To at least make the attempt, find the app on Facebook and send them a message. If they ask for your User ID, you can find that back on the Apps page by clicking on the app in question and scrolling all the way down.

It feels like you should be done now, but you're not. From that same Apps page, go down just a smidge further to Apps, Websites, and Plugins. If you don't want Facebook bleeding into any other part of your online experience—that's games, user profiles, apps, you name it—then click Disable Platform. This could have unintended consequences, especially if you've used Facebook to login to other sites! Only one way to find out, though.

And then scroll down just one more teensy bit to Apps Others Use, where you'll see about a dozen bits of information about you, like your birthday, or if you're online, that your friends might unwittingly be sharing with apps and websites. Uncheck anything you don't want out there in the world, which is honestly probably all of it.

OK, now you're done. With apps. There's still a lot left, though.

Bad Ads

Back to the Settings panel! This time head to Ads, which you'll find right below Apps. (The fact that neither of these falls under Security or Privacy should tell you all you need to know about Facebook's disposition here.)

Just to be clear, Facebook—along with Google, and tons of faceless ad networks—tracks your every move online, even if you don't have an account. That's the internet we're stuck with for now, and no amount of settings tweaks can fix it. What you can do, though, is take a modicum of control over what Facebook does with that information.

That pair of shoes that haunts your News Feed, even though you already bought a similar pair? Exorcise them by turning off Ads based on my use of websites and apps.

"Online interest-based ads" are advertisements that rely on access to your browsing activity.

Also say no to Ads on apps and websites off the Facebook companies, which covers all the non-Facebook parts internet where the company serves up ads—which is pretty much everywhere. Then head straight down the line to Ads with your social actions, which you should only leave on in the event you want to share with the world that you accidentally clicked Like on that sponsored post from a furniture company that probably exists only on a server in Luxembourg.

And for some fun insight into what Facebook thinks you're into, click on Your Interests. There you'll find the categories that Facebook uses to tailor ads to your Liking. You can clear out any that bother you by clicking the X in the upper-righthand corner when you hover over, but mostly it's a fun lesson in how digital advertisers distill your essence. You'll also likely find at least one surprise; Facebook thinks I'm into IndyCar, which honestly, maybe, if I'd only give it a chance.

Please remember that none of this will in any way change the number of ads you see on Facebook or around the web. For that, you'll need an ad blocker.

Friends Focus

After a decade on Facebook, you've likely picked up friends along the way you no longer recognize—not just their profile picture, their name and context. Who are all these people? Why are they Liking my baby pics? Why aren't they liking my baby pics?

To get a handle on who can see which of your posts, it's finally time to head to Settings then Privacy.

Start with Who can see my posts, then click on Who can see my future posts to manage your defaults. You've got options! You can go full-on public and share with the world, or limit your circle by geography, employers, schools, groups, you name it. Whatever you pick will be your default from here on out.

Whatever you pick, immediately go to Limit the audience for posts you've shared with friends of friends or public? to make that choice retroactive. In other words, if you had a public account until now, changing your settings won't automatically make your past posts private. You have to get in a few extra clicks for that.

Not everyone you know needs to see everything you do.

Skip ahead down to How People Find and Contact You, since that's thankfully pretty straightforward. Tweak all the settings to your liking. The main note here: Don't share your email or phone number unless you absolutely have to, and if you do, keep the circle as small as possible. (If you do have to share one or the other with Facebook for account purposes, you can hide them by going to your profile page, clicking Contact and Basic Info, then Edit when you mouse over the email field. From there, click on the downward arrow with two silhouettes to customize who can see it, including no one but you.)

And while we're almost done with this part, first we have to talk about tagging. If people want to tag you on Facebook, there's not much you can do about it. Sorry! But you can at least stop those embarrassing pics from showing up in your timeline. Enable the option to Review posts you're tagged in before the post appears on your timeline so you can clear anything out that you'd rather not see there.

Then, head to Timeline and Tagging in the left-hand menu. There you can limit who can post to your timeline, who can see which posts, who can see what you're tagged in, and so on. Your tolerance here will vary depending on how active a Facebook user you are and how obnoxious your friends can be, but at the very least it's helpful for setting custom audiences that exclude people—your boss, maybe, or an ex—you definitely don't want taking an active role in your Facebook experience.

To test out those changes, head to Review what other people see on your timeline, where you can see what your account looks like through the eyes of a set of people or a specific friend.

One last thing: You'll see a Face Recognition option in the left-hand menu pane as well. It has some genuine uses, like letting you know if someone is using a photo of you in their account for trolling or impersonation. But if you're fundamentally more creeped out by Facebook's algorithms hunting for your face than by potential human jerks, go ahead and switch it off.

What About Russians?

While it still sounds like the subplot to a lesser Die Hard installment, dozens of Russian propagandists really did infiltrate Facebook a few years ago. Did you follow or like one of their accounts? Find out for sure here, assuming Facebook doesn't once again upwardly revise the number. And then find a way to get that link in front of your aunt. You know which one I mean.

Is Facebook Listening To Everything I Say?

By this point, it's a trope: You have a casual conversation about umbrellas with your roommate—as one does—and a few hours later, umbrella ads flood your News Feed. Surely this means Facebook's using your smartphone's mic to eavesdrop, right?

Well, no, sorry! As we've explained here and others have investigated elsewhere, Facebook's not actually hijacking your microphone. For starters, it would be wildly impractical not only to sort through all that data, but to figure out which words meant anything.

Besides, worrying about Facebook eavesdropping distracts from the far more concerning fact that it doesn't have to. The things you and your friends do online, and where you do them, and when, and how, and from what locations, all form more than enough of a profile to inform ads that feel like Facebook isn't just listening in on your conversations, but on your private thoughts. So, please do feel better about the mic thing, but much, much worse about the state of internet tracking, targeting, and advertising at large.

Going Nuclear

If even scrolling through all of these settings tweaks has left you exhausted, much less actually implementing them, you do have a more efficient option: pulling the plug altogether.

Before you do this: First, do recognize that this won't solve all of your online ad woes. You'll still be tracked, targeted, and so on across the web, both by Facebook and other ad networks. They'll all have that much less info to work with, though! So that's something.

And second, if you do decide to go through with it, think about downloading your account first. There's no reason to lose all those photos and statuses and such. To preserve those memories offline, head to Settings > General Account Settings > Download a copy of your Facebook data and click Start my archive. Facebook will email you with a download link when it's ready, which you should pounce on since it'll expire eventually.

OK all set? Here we go. Head back to Settings again, where you'll start in General. Click on Manage Account, scroll past the grim "what happens to my social media presence when I die" bits, and click Deactivate my account. You'll need to enter your password here, look at photos of friends who will "miss" you, take a quick survey about why you're bailing, and then click Deactivate one more time.

There are several steps to deleting your account. Be sure to complete all of them.

Please note that you have not yet actually deleted your account! You've just put it in hibernation, in case you ever decide to come back. For full-on deletion—which means if you do decide to go back you'll have to start from scratch—head to this link right here. That'll put you just a password entry and a CAPTCHA away from freedom. There's a delay of a few days though, and if you sign back on in the interim, Facebook will go ahead and cancel that deletion request. So stick to your guns, don't log in, and maybe delete the Facebook app from your phone just in case.

And that's it! You're clear, at least until Facebook changes its privacy options once again. Whether you decide to stay or leave, the important thing is to take as much control over how your data gets used as possible. Sometimes that's still not a lot—but it's something.

That's What Friends Are For

A recap of the week a hurricane flattened Facebook

Cambridge Analytica's targeting efforts probably didn't work, but Facebook should be embarrassed anyway

If you want to be done with Facebook altogether, remember that it owns Instagram too

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Media Attacks Trump Golfing with Lies about Trump's Golf Count

Media Attacks Trump Golfing with Lies about Trump's Golf Count

TrumpGolfCount.com Reported That The Cost To Taxpayers To Use of Air Force One by Trump to Go Golfing Was Off By $60 Million Dollars

The Washington Post' Philip Bump, Previously wrote Air Force One cost $200,000 to operate per hour, but for his Trump story he lied and claimed it was $514,000. When Bluepillsheep.com stumbled across a tweet claiming the President Trump Golfing was costing American taxpayers $92 million dollars to use Air Force One to fly him to NJ and Florida to play Golf, we knew we needed to start an investigation. Many may ask why I spent three, four, five days researching Trump Golfing? My answer is simple. I believe in being honest and nothing gets me more upset than seeing lies and the use of manipulation in order to Hurt President Trump and by extension America. Additionally, we then discovered the dishonesty of the Washington Post and the blatant lies told by their journalist Philip Bump. The bottom line is nothing gets me more upset than reading what the TrumpGolfCount website owner/creator Sophie Germain wrote on her about me page about the cost of Trump Golfing Basically, I'm a data junkie. Probably like you, I am concerned about the erosion of truth that is currently plaguing U.S. politics, and I am kind of unhealthily obsessed with calling out hypocrisy wherever I see it. When someone writes something that omits facts in exchange for lies, then that makes all honest journalist and websites look bad. I have written many times about CNN Briant Stelter for the fact that he does the exact same thing.   Real Facts Not Fiction Ms. Germain claims that she set out to create a website that would be factual, yet entertaining. Well, It is entertaining because I had a great time figuring out how many lies could be packed into a site only a few pages in total.  It was also hilarious reading the numerous times Ms. Germaine announced how honest and factual she was. With all her "I am so honest"  and her fight against the "Erosion of Truth." I had to look up and wonder. Was she heaven sent? After an hour of research, I knew I was looking in the wrong direction if I wanted to know where she came from. When I went to the site originally the front page claimed That Trump Golfing was costing American Taxpayers:

TRUMP GOLF COUNT: 81

Cost to Taxpayer: At least $92,xxx,xxx But, after a few hours of research, and then going back to their site, all of a sudden it now it read:

TRUMP GOLF COUNT: 82*

Cost to Taxpayer: At least $42,465,519** The site dropped $50 million dollars from the total? The site has been up for around 8-months.  But just moments after BluePillSheep.com contacted Ms. Germain to inform her that we would be undertaking this investigation, did they discover a $60 $50 Million Dollar accounting error? On the front page of Trump Golf Count Ms. Germaine wrote **Wait a minute! Why is the cost lower now? Delusion Dingbat Eagle-eyed visitors returning to the TrumpGolfCount website will probably notice that there has been a dramatic drop in the "Cost to taxpayers" estimate displayed on the front page (from $92 million to $42 million). This is especially embarrassing, since the higher cost had been shared widely online, and even quoted by the mainstream media. Ugh. Admitting you're wrong is not fun! Of course, she made no mention of us, as expected. But it's quite a leap of faith to believe that, after 8-months online it just so happens mere moments after we talked to Ms. Germain to inform her about our investigation, that an "Eagle-eyed visitor" pops up to tell  TrumpGolfCount.com their numbers were off by $60 $50 Million Dollars. Ms. Germain added: In the end, the most important thing will always be to keep the facts "real". I'm grateful to have had this opportunity to demonstrate that when I am wrong, you can count on me to admit it. I appreciate all your kind feedback about TrumpGolfCount and will continue to track and report honestly. Incredibly, Ms. Germain actually believes she deserved credit for keeping it "real." I would have laughed if it wasn't for the fact that she is so pathetically dishonest.   Sophia Germain Made My Case For Me Ms. Germain made my argument for me as to why I just spent three, four, five days researching her disingenuous site. She wrote the Main Street Media (MSM) quoted her site as source material. What a disgrace. God only knows how many people in the world now believe these lies. Worse is her reaction "Ugh." How about being ethically honest and writing "To all the visitors to this site, I'm terribly sorry, we made an egregious error. We also wish to apologize to President Trump for the misinformation created in news reports based on our faulty reporting." It is amazing to me that website could write thousands of words disparaging President Trump, but thirty is far too many when these sites are wrong.    Facts are NOT Assumptions According to Ms. Germain, she attributed the $60 $50 million Dollar accounting error was due to Melania and Baron being in New York and how the  Government allocated the money. She wrote: Originally, Congress had allocated $60 million per year for these costs. I, foolishly making the assumption that the money would all go to Florida and New Jersey for golf-related costs, included $60 million per year in the site's cost estimates. In Ms. Germain's explanation, there is a link that brings you to a Business Insider article. In the second paragraph this is what the author wrote: About $60 million will be allocated to the US Secret Service, which requested the additional funds for expenses that include costs for Trump's security detail and protecting Trump Tower in New York City, according to a New York Times report that cited the legislation. I am dismayed by not only this sites incompetence but also by Ms. Germain's reading comprehension and arithmetic skills. TrumpGolfCount states "Just the Facts, the Real Facts." With such a bold tagline, it begs the questions: The original amount listed was $92 Million Dollars, then it was changed to $42 Million... Why then did TrumpGolfCount  only removed $50 out of the $60 Million Dollar error they discovered? How in the world did Ms. Germain assume the full $60 $50 Million Dollars would ALL go toward Trump's golf-related costs? Does Ms. Germain know that "Facts" are not assumptions? Why did it take so long for Ms. Germain to discover this error? It's quite obvious.... You're reading why. The truth is Sophia Germain originally made the error because it fits so beautifully into the narrative of her website.   This was no mistake, this was a blatant act of deception and dishonesty to further her agenda and to make money off of her lies. How do I know? Just keep reading.   Who Cares? TrumpGolfCount revolves around one number and one number only. You would assume it's the number of times President Trump Golfs but you would be mistaken. The most important number of Trump Golf Count is $514,000. This $514,000 thousand Dollar figure is what Ms. Germain considers the cost for each hour Air Force One is flying. Ms. Germain uses this number to achieve her eye-popping $92 Million $42 Million Dollar Taxpayer cost.  While TrumpGolfCount  will of course, counter with "it's the number of times Trump golfed because it shows he's lazy." The number of rounds Trump Golf's affects no one. Some people will assume Trump is more interested in Golf than running the country, but as we saw earlier what happens when you assume something. Since Donald Trump has been President: The Stock market is at an all-time record high. For the first time in history, the stock market had 70 single day record highs recorded in one year Unemployment is at a 17-year low Consumer confidence is at a 17-year high While President Obama was the first President not to have a 3% GDP year,  in any of his eight years. Trump first three quarters all over 3% and the 1st quarter of 2018 may reach 4%. Christmas sales reached $600 Billion dollars, another NEW all-timerecord. Despite the media making you believe otherwise, 95% of working Americans will be getting a tax reduction. With these types of results from Trump's MAGAnomics, most American's will be lining up to drive Trump to the Golf course. If TrumpGolfCount  headline read "Trump golfed 42 times" with Trump's economic numbers, I seriously doubt anyone would care. Now, a website claiming Trump has spent $92 Million $42 Million Dollars of taxpayer money to fly to New Jersey or Florida to play golf... Well, that gets peoples attention, because that is our money.   $514,000 a Day On the TrumpGolfCount website, they listed the cost to fly Air Force One as $514,000? So where did they get this number? On their FAQ page Ms. Germain explained how: How do you calculate the cost reported on your main page? Our total estimated cost currently includes three components: Cost of flights to Mar a Lago and Bedminster, New Jersey, using Philip Bump's estimate of $514,000 per hour of flight time. After doing three, four, five days of research (Five days more than TrumpGolfCount has ever done) we know exactly how honest this site is.  Hint: Not very!  We also discovered just how concerned Sophia Germain and TrumpGolfCount are about the erosion of truth. Hint: Not very!  On the websites Message from Sophia" page Ms. Germain wrote : Even my own mother asked me "Sophie, why are you doing this?" Well, my primary mission is to get these numbers right! Did anyone tell Sophia Germain it's not right to lie to your mom? Because if her primary mission was to get the numbers right, then she has failed miserably. Air Force One Per Hour Cost If you were starting TrumpGolfCount and needed specific information, such as "How can I find out when Trump Golfs?" Nearly everyone would start by doing a search on Google or Bing.  Of course, one of those questions that you would certainly ask is "How much does it cost to fly Air Force One per hour?" We didn't even need to read through hundreds of pages to discover the answer. Nearly every single search result that appeared listed the cost either in the title or in its excerpt. Keep in mind: Sophia Germain said her whole reason for starting the site was because "I am concerned about the erosion of truth." TrumpGolfCount's "Truth" is  that Air Force One's cost per hour is $514,000 Thousand Dollars Here are the first five results from Google. Please note we custom dated the search to end 3/1/2017, you'll understand in a moment. It costs about $200000 an hour to operate Air Force One — here's why ... www.businessinsider.com/air-force-one-travel-costs-president-trump-2017-2 Mar 1, 2017 - It costs about $200,000 an hour to operate Air Force One — here's why it's so expensive. Over the past couple of weeks, the exorbitant... Under Obama, Air Force One cost per hour jumps 27% to $228,288 www.washingtonexaminer.com/under...air-force-one-cost-per-hour-jumps.../2544831 Feb 28, 2014 - Judicial Watch told Secrets that the sky-high jet travel costs for the first family's 2012-2013 Christmas vacation in Hawaii, their beach vacation on Martha's Vineyard last summer and President Obama's brief trip to California in August totalled $7,396,531.20. The Air Force said it costs $228,288 an hour to fly Air Force One, ... Air Force One is a heck of an expensive perk — for taxpayers - The ... https://www.washingtonpost.com/.../air-force-one-is-a-heck-of-an-expensive-perk-for... Jul 5, 2016 - Because we are talking about Air Force One. Trips on the president's plane cost about $200,000 an hour, according to CNN, although the primary passenger gets his rides comped. Trump Says Air Force One Costs Are “Out of Control.” By How Much ... fortune.com › Leadership › air force one Dec 10, 2016 - Air Force One Cost Per Hour. Flying like the president doesn't come cheap. Operating expenses total $206,337 for every hour the president's plane is in the air. The average domestic round-trip airline fare in the U.S. is $361, according to the Bureau of Transportation Statistics. This means more than 571 plane tickets could ... Does It Cost Taxpayers $200,000 per Hour for President Obama to ... https://www.snopes.com/taxpayers-air-force-one/ Claim: It costs American taxpayers roughly $200,000 an hour every time President Obama travels in Air Force One to campaign for Hillary Clinton. See Example( s ) Fact check by Snopes.com: MIXTURE The next 12 pages of search results were remarkably similar. We went through the first 120 search results and the cost ranged from around $177,000 to $228,000. The majority listed the cost to fly Air Force One per hour at either $200,000 or $206,000. It is hard to pin down exact numbers because rarely does the Air Force release this information. You would need to use the Freedom of Information Act to compel the Air Force to send you the exact costs. But just doing ONE Google search, you'll know a safe answer would be $206,000 per hour. BluePillSheep.com was able to get our hands on a Judicial Watch FOIA Air Force Document. The official letter stated that the true cost to fly Trump to Florida on Air Force One was $142,380 per Hour.

The complete letter and also additional Air Force letters and records stated the flight costs of Air Force one can be found at the end of this story. There is an additional letter pegging the cost at $228,000 per hour, but that one was from an Obama 2012 trip to Hawaii, which had different needs and of course, costs. The $142,380 cost is from 2017 and is one of Trumps flight to Mar-a-largo. I may be wrong but isn't $142,380 a far cry from the supposed truthful number of $514,000 that TrumpGolfCount uses?   The Lie of $514,000 Please note We will be doing a follow-up story on this Philip Bump story that will be published Jan 2, 2018. We will go into greater detail about How Philip Bump and the Washington Post's created this fictional story. I doubt we would have to spend much time on the "Why" they did it. For this story, we are just focusing on TrumpGolfCount's use of the $518,000 thousand Dollar amount and where they obtained it. Ms. Germaine in creating TrumpGolfCount wrote: *Cost estimates for Trump's travel to Mar a Lago and Bedminster are from The Washington Post.  "Cost of flights to Mar a Lago and Bedminster, New Jersey, using Philip Bump's estimate of $514,000 per hour of flight time" The link points back to a Washington Post article entitled How much is Donald Trump’s travel and protection costing, anyway? penned by Philip Bump. In that article Bump wrote: If we assume, just for the sake of an estimate, that the full cost of the 2013 trip can be allocated by hour of overall flight time — since the trips themselves were about the same length, one weekend, and since air support costs ate up most of the bill — we get an estimate of about $514,000 an hour. ($3.6 million divided by 3½ hours to and from Chicago and four hours to and from Palm Beach).   A five-hour trip to Palm Beach, then, would be about $2 million — $514,000 times four hours.  Philip Bump Lied We have just shown you that on March 17, 2017, Philip Bump writing about Air Force One's cost per hour wrote "we get an estimate of about $514,000 an hour. So how can Philip Bump justify claiming Air Force One cost was $514,000, when on July 5, 2016, the same Philip Bump wrote another Washington Post story entitled Air Force One is a heck of an expensive perk — for taxpayers. In that story Philip Bump wrote this: Because we are talking about Air Force One. Trips on the president's plane cost about $200,000 an hour, according to CNN, although the primary passenger gets his rides comped. Not only did Philip Bump @pbump write that Air Force One cost per hour was $200,00, he used multiple sources in his article that reconfirmed that the figure he quoted was 'in the ballpark.'  Below are the links from his story: CNBC: "Air Force One costs $206,337 an hour to operate." CNN: "Cost is per hour for Air Force One is $200,000 Thousand." New York Times: "Expenses are not limited to Air Force One, which costs $179,750 an hour..." for “ Politico: "The cost of flying Air Force One is more than $200,000 per flying hour" Washington Post: an additional WaPo story stating "Air Force One, which costs an estimated $200,000 an hour to fly" Additionally, Philip Bump showed he is well aware of the capabilities of Air Force One when on Dec  6, 2016, he wrote another article for the Washington Post entitled So which is better: Donald Trump’s plane or Air Force One? In that story, Bump does a comparison of Air Force One to Trump Force One. So why did Philip Bump in 2016 write $200,000 but then in 2017 claim it to be $514,000?  That answer is crystal clear. In 2016 Obama was our President and in March of 2017 Trump was .   January 2nd We will go into greater detail how Bump was able to achieve his unethical $514,000 cost figure on our upcoming Jan 2nd article. For now, we will just provide our readers with a broad overview of how Bump manipulated the numbers in order to achieve his $514,000 lie. Bump relied on a 2016 General Accounting Office (GAO) Report detailing the cost of a 2013 Obama trip to Palm Beach. Here is how that 2016 report came into existence. In 2013 Obama took a weekend golf trip to Palm Beach, Florida, with a side trip to Chicago. Judicial Watch along with Left-Wing watchdog groups concerned about the mounting costs of Obama's trips, started asking Congress for some answers. Sen. John Barrasso, a Wyoming Republican, asked the Government Accountability Office to probe the Obama trip. The GOA report was finally completed in the fall of 2016 and released. Politico, CBS and later CNN all used this 2016 report, stating that the Obama trip cost $3 Million Dollars. Bump used the GAO report's  bottom line number of $3.6 million for Obama's 2013 trip to Palm Beach. Then taking the $3.6 million he divided it by the 3½ hours to and from Chicago and the four hours to and from Palm Beach and Wallah, Bump has his magical, Unicorn shooting a rainbow out its ass figure of $514k.   Facts Really Do Suck

The fact is the GOA did a horrible job in creating and then presenting this report to Congress.  The major problem was figuring out the additional support needed due to the fact that Obama made a side trip to Chicago for a few hours. This little side trip meant additional planes were uses, equipment relocated, and additional men and logistical support were needed to safeguard the President. On the map located to the right, you can get a sense of how much movement actually took place when Obama made his little side trip. On any normal trip to Palm Beach Florida, you would see a map with a few point 'A' to point 'B'  lines indicating a typical Air Force One flight  to and from Washington DC and Palm Beach, Florida The 2013 Obama trip was nothing of the sort and now made that point 'A' to point 'B' map seem more like it was showing various weather patterns of the eastern United States. All this movement of men and equipment dramatically increased the cost and it is for this very reason, the author of that GAO report, Brian Lepore, said: "... that figure shouldn't be applied to Trump's travel."   Lepore  also said: "It's hard to substitute one trip for another, even if the destination is the same," Whether Bump was aware of the GAO report before or after his article was published matters little. Bump had no need to use a report from an Obama trip made in 2013. In fact, Bump did not need to do any research on Air Force One's cost per hour at all. Bump presumably did research for his 2016 Obama story. Additionally Bump not only had his research (If he did any) but also the six other sources he previously used in his 2016 articles.  All of those reports clearly indicated that the cost was in the range of $200,000 per hour. Instead, of using all that research at hand, Bump spent an unknown number of hours manipulating, and creatively spinning the costs reported in the GAO report. Why?  He needed a "wow" number so he could lie about President Trump. I never graduated 11th grade, I never took a single journalism class, and I am, without-a-doubt a grammar Nazi's worst nightmare. With that said, I consider myself more of a journalist than Philip Bump could ever be.  No amount of parchment he has received from various institutions of learning could ever supersede Philip Bump's blatant lack of journalistic integrity. Sophia Germain An Incompetent Fool or Something far worse. While I am sure TrumpGolfCount will claim, they are innocent, because the $514k number was pulled from Bump's Washington Post article, so he is to blame for the error. While technically this is true, the fact that Sophia Germain did little to no actual fact checking, along with the $60 Million Dollar ooops. Proves whatever amounts she is trying to claim as Factual, cannot be, nor should it ever be trusted. It also does little to let her escape her utter failure to do even the most basic journalistic research.  She could not have dismissed out of hand 18 pages worth of Google results pegging the Air Force One cost in the neighborhood of $200,000 Thousand Dollars. She could not have ignored the GAO warning not to use the Obama 2013 trip numbers for any of President Trumps Air Force One trips to Mar a Lago. Ms. Germain failed to use even one of a dozen different ways that we have found in the past five days that debunk's Philip Bump's story. Hell, she could have used Philip Bump 2016 Obama story to debunked his own 2017 story.   As Ben Shapiro is fond of saying "Facts don't care about your feelings." Ms. Germain wrote: Each person is entitled to his or her own opinion, but it is the firm belief of the creators of trumpgolfcount.com that the President does very little work and plays quite a bit of golf when visiting his golf clubs. Unfortunately, Ms. Germain steadfastly claimed that TrumpGolfCount does not deal with opinions, this site is "Just the Facts, the Real Facts" Since when does "My firm Belief" count as a fact? As Trey Gowdy said Facts are neither Republican nor Democrat, they are simply facts. As the evidence has shown, Ms. Germain wouldn't know a fact if it kicked her in her ass. Ms. Germain states "it is the firm belief of the creators of trumpgolfcount.com that the President does very little work and plays quite a bit of golf when visiting his golf clubs." Really? How would you know? Ms. Germain stated, "there is generally no way to tell if he is out on the links at any given time." So let me get this straight. TrumpGolfCount knows all about Trump's work ethic, but is clueless as to WHEN he golfs? We have a comment section below it would be interesting if she can list what facts lead her to have such a "firm belief" that Trump is lazy? She can also answer these questions: What does Trump do every day inside the White House? What time did Trump go to sleep? When did Trump wake up? Ms. Germain and TrumpGolfCount are so clueless they can't even tell you what Trump's favorite color is? At this point can anyone believe Sophie Germain and TrumpGolfCount.com cares about Facts? Being honest? Or fighting against the "Erosion of Truth?"   Trump Golfing Count Hypocrisy It is kind of amazing that we went to the Trump Golf Count Facebook page and wrote ONE post. That post said we will be exposing their lies  today. We also added one tidbit of evidence to back up our claim. It seems a site that attacks Trump cannot handle the truth being told about themselves... Because they deleted my post. For the record, I have no problem with Obama playing golf. But we will expose  Democrats and websites such as TrumpGolfCount whenever they lie or ignore facts because it does not conform to their agenda. We will go after anyone who uses lies to attack President Trump. Democrats, Liberals or anyone else are entitled to their opinion, but they're not entitled to make up their own FACTS The  TrumpGolfCount site rightfully points out Trump's, August 2016 complaint about Obama "I'm going to be working for you. I'm not going to have time to go play golf." We absolutely agree with criticizing President Trump's hypocrisy in that tweet. But while many are right to do so, looking from the outside in, no one could ever conceive of what it is like to be President of The United States. So I give Trump a pass because he may not have known the pressures or the grind of being President. I also gave Obama a pass when he did the same exact thing... but what he did was far worse because it didn't involve Golf, it involved suffering Americans. Again I let Obama go because he may not have been aware of what Bush had to live with every day. We are only addressing this here because of this site using Trump's Obama Golf Tweet.  AGAIN! I never bothered with this story, because as with Trump's Golf tweet, Obama may not have fully comprehended what a President deals with. With that said I will address it now to be a counter balance the TrumpGolfCount attack on President Trump. Do As I Say, Not As I Do Days after Katrina devastated Louisiana, Mississippi and other surrounding states, then Senator Obama had plenty to say about President Bush. Campaigning for president (Like Trump), he slammed Bush for flying Air Force One over the the devastated area. "We can talk about what happened for two days in 2005 and we should. We can talk about levees that couldn't hold, a FEMA that seemed not just incompetent but paralyzed and powerless, about a president who only saw the people from the window of an airplane instead of down here on the ground." https://youtu.be/9X0lEbi2LHU The only thing I can tell Former President Obama is... At Least Former President George Bush went there. It did not matter being a thousand of feet up, at least he saw the devastation with his own eyes. In 2016 when Louisiana experienced historic flooding, Obama was taking a 16-day vacation at Martha's Vineyard. The Red Cross has called it the worst storm to hit the U.S. since Superstorm Sandy. When all was said and done, 13 people were killed, 150,000 homes and businesses were damaged,  and more than 100,000 had applied for assistance from the Federal Emergency Management Agency. Three days after the devastation occurred, Obama was made to look foolish by then-candidate Donald Trump. While Obama was busy working on the back nine at Martha's Vineyard, Trump along with Mike Pence toured the devastated area and handing out supplies and consoling the victims. Worse for Obama not only did he refuse to cut short his golfing vacation , he also had issued no public or written statements about the crisis, which has now been dubbed the Great Louisiana Flood of 2016. A few days later Obama shamefully showed up. If you were looking for answers as to why Hillary Clinton lost the election. One could very well be this moment in time. Hillary issued a statement promising she will only visit the area "at a time when the presence of a political campaign will not disrupt the response." The fake news media nodded in agreement and never called her out for lying because she NEVER went to visit the victims. A Man Of Honor Despite Obama attacking him about Katrina, when Obama did the same thing a reporter set Former President Bush up by asking him about Obama's golfing. Instead of taking the bail, a man with honor and class answered. “You know, I see our president criticized for playing golf. I don’t – I think he ought to play golf,” Bush says in the interview. “Because I know what it’s like to be in the bubble. And I know the pressures of the job. And to be able to get outside and play golf with some of your pals is important for the president. It does give you an outlet.”   An Omission of Facts TrumpGolfCount loves comparing Obama to Trump, but they conveniently forget to mention a few details that would have destroyed their narrative. I think the most important fact is where America was during each President's first year in office. in 2008 America was a mess, between Bush and a Democratic-run House and Senate we were in the middle of the great recession. So it's not hard to imagine the reason why Obama did not have time to golf. In his first four years, Obama only averaged 24 rounds per year. After his re-election in 2012, the number of rounds Obama played jumped to an average of 47 rounds per year. Some other facts that were left out. In a  Golf Channel Report, Obama golfed a total of 333 times over his eight years. Presidents Woodrow Wilson was estimated to have played 1,200 rounds of Golf in his 8-years. Dwight Eisenhower was estimated to have played 800 rounds, in his eight-years in office. According to The Golf Channel avid golfers which Obama and Trump are likely considered plays 56 rounds a year, a number Obama matched in 2014. Nicknamed "The duffer in chief" Obama played 81 rounds of golf and had attended 75 political fund-raisers in the 628 days after his 2012 re-election, according to an analysis of his schedule that the  New York Post found. The problem for President Obama is not that he played... But when he played. We already talked about Obama's worst golfing gaffe. That was when he shamed by Trump to visit the Louisiana Flood victims. Another example was America witnessing President Obama hitting off the tees at Martha's Vineyard golf course only moments after addressing the nation on the horrific beheading of American journalist James Foley. Even Obama admitted, a month later,  that he messed up because it was not a good time to go golfing. Another Oops moment happened after Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 was shot down by Russia-backed separatists. In the following three days Obama got a round of golf in and attended two fund-raisers in Manhattan. Going to Call Trump Lazy?  Better Bring More Than a Feeling Of Proof We at BluePillSheep have never, will never criticize President Obama for golfing, or picking the NCAA basketball brackets live on ESPN, or any other similar activity. There are two very important reasons why. We MUST then hold Trump to the exact same standards. Every single president goes absolutely gray for one specific reason. 24/7/365/1459 and maybe 2,918.  That is how many hours and days the President of the United States is feeling the unimaginable pressure of having to care and protect a nation of 325 million people. I find it stunningly asinine when so many people, both Democrat and Republican charge any President as being "Lazy," when they themselves could not come close to handling just one day of what he must deal with.  Being President does NOT mean you get chained to a desk for four years. The oath he takes does not say: I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States,  I will never leave my office, I will not play with my children, I will never sleep, I will never take a moment off from doing the job I was elected to and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States. What About Vacations? Do vacations count? If not why? Don't they cost taxpayer money? According to a government watchdog group, the total cost of the Obamas’ vacations and travel stands at $105,662,975.27. The organization calculated the number through a series of Freedom of Information Act requests. The figure includes: The Obama family vacation to Martha’s Vineyard in August 2016 that cost taxpayers $2,684,271.36 Obama’s trip to LA in October 2016 for two campaign fundraisers and an appearance on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” that cost taxpayers $195,855 Michelle Obama’s infamous trip to Morocco that cost taxpayers $244,218.01 How much the Secret Service spent during the Obamas’ final vacation in Hawaii, which cost taxpayers $1,862,230.74 Also if we use the 514k number that TrumpGolfCount uses for Trump. Obama's 333 rounds of golf would equate to...

$171 Million Dollars

  The American Taxpayer Is a Cheap Ungrateful Boss TrumpGolfCount 's whole site revolves around the $514,000 per hour price tag that Trump Golfing was costing us, the taxpayers.  We proved those numbers were all made up lies. One of the very reason's I never claim any President "lazy" or judge their work habits,  is this.  The President is running the largest corporation in the world and for that, he receives a measly $400,000. Americas Top Five CEO Salaries for 2016 based on salary, these do not include items such as stock options, pay packages, benefits. Marc Lore, Walmart U.S. E-commerce CEO: $236 Million. Tim Cook, Apple: $150,036,907 John Weinberg, Evercore: $123,991,055 Sundar Pichai, Google: $106,502,419 Elon Musk Tesla: $99,744,920

Beyond the salary, can you imagine having tens of millions of people ridicule you, make fun of you, create disparaging memes, comments about you? Then add in millions of people making fun of your family? Many claimed Trump is having sex with his daughter. Michelle Obama is really transgender and Obama is gay? WTF? As an added bonus you get thousands of reporters, journalists, and television media hounding your every movement, analyzing every single word. Just the other day CNN had someone hiding in a bush just to get a shot of Trump Golfing. For eight years Obama has been ridiculed and subjected to a vast amount of hate, and love.  But what he was subjected to was nothing compared to Trump. President Trump has not even been in office for one-year and the Democrats want to jail him, call him Nazi, label him an Anti-Semite despite his daughter and grandchildren being Jewish.  For what?  A $400,000 Dollar salary, which by the way he gives to charity. I will close with this If Sophia Germain is so filled with hate about President Trump playing Golf that she needs to lie about it. She not only needs a new hobby but maybe she needs to get a life as well.  

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