#the airport at like 4am and then ill get back to my apartment at after 12am on the return. like i said my time was flexible but wtf lady?

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[taking-over-his-life]

I wanted to be a biker, and my new job gave me a chance Ill never forget

I had just been successful at getting a promotion as a station manager to one of the central logistics hubs. The company had a range of logistics services including parcel delivery by van, specialist delivery by motorbike, and special link to the airport for customs clearance. I was really excited about it as it was only 5 miles from my house, and it was the first opportunity to manage 100 staff that was based at this site.

 My office was on the first floor and had a window that looked out over the main logistics centre, so I could see people coming and going on bikes and in vans.    

 In my first months I spent the time to get to know the management, supervisors and staff, or as many as I could. I spent a bit of time in the staff restaurant with the men and women that work there.

 I took special interest in the motorcycle courier section as I had a general interest in the bikes as well as those who rode them. They were out in all weathers and it showed on their leathers, and faces, well worn and when you got close you could also smell their gear. It took all my will power to keep my hands off them. I watched them in the smoking area in groups, laughing and horsing about with each other. 

 I was stuck up here doing the planning. Damn they seemed so happy so free. I watched as they came in from the rain, and put their drenched leathers over the radiators in the locker room. The smell wafted upstairs upsetting the women in the admin pool. I said I'd sort it, but damn I loved it. 

 I went down so they thought I was dealing. There were two guys in the locker room were in their undies, fuck I nearly came. ‘You ok guys’, I said. ‘Fucking soaking’ one replied, the other kept his head down. ‘Well get dry before you go out’. I said ‘Do we not supply waterproofs’ I said, ‘yes but forgot them’ he said. I walked out with a nose and lung full of that masculine smell. You would often find me down there during the day to get to know the guys.

 After a couple of months it was time for me to check out the night shift.

 There were a number of people I had not met, plus I wanted to see how the shifts worked. I checked in advance, and there was one controller who was at the far side of the complex, two drivers and 1 motorcycle courier who were working that night shift. 

 I arrived at about 1 am, and went straight to my office to do a little bit of work before I introduced myself to those on duty.

 I decided to go in nice and tidy, and wear a suit. After about 30-minutes I went downstairs, and decided to go straight to the control room. There was a guy in it called Dan. He got a bit of a shock that I was there, but I had a good chat with him and asked where the drivers were. 

 Both are out on jobs but they would be back in about 2 or 3 hours. I said I would let him know if I was still here when they got back. I would also let him know when I was leaving. 

 I asked about the courier and he said he would be in the crew room which was under the admin block right at the other side of the complex. There was nothing scheduled for him that night he was just on standby for emergencies.

 I walked over to the crew room. It was about 5-minutes walk from the control room. Dan had to stay in control room to man the phone and the radio so I knew it was only me and the biker on that side of the building

 It will be interesting to meet him. It was about 3 a.m. I had a boner which is normal for me at night, I just somehow had to keep it hidden so a little bit of adjustment and I felt more comfortable.

 It was going to be interesting to see how he reacted when the boss arrived. I was always professional so didn't see it as a major problem for myself 5 minutes conversation and I'll be back upstairs and could have a real good wank.

 I went into to crew room and there was no one there that I could see, so I went around the other side by the kitchen just to see whether he was there there was no one there.  I decided to go out into a corridor and go into the locker room, it's always something I enjoy, as the smell of guys leather boots old clothes damp clothes so erotic. 

 I pushed the door open and to my shock I saw the courier on the bench in between the lockers wearing his off-road boots, leather jeans and a black T-shirt. His Boots were on the back of two seats with his hand on his dick wanking furiously.

 What shocked me is how much he was so into it, he neither heard nor saw me. I stood there getting so excited rubbing my own groin. He opened his eyes and jumped when he saw me. ‘Don't move’ I said really loudly,’keep going you need to release’. 

 He put his hand back on his dick and smiled at me, ‘you want to help’ he said beckoning me over. I did and walked over to him I got down on my knees and moved my head towards his erect dick and swallowed his shaft licking and sucking as I moaned with delight.

 My hands were on his leathered thighs, and I could feel his muscles under the warm leather. His gloved hands came over and pushed my head down so the top of his dick was at the back of my throat, I just moaned with absolute delight.

 I was inbetween his legs tasting his premium smelling his leathers and feeling the warmth of his body through the leather was just incredible.  I looked up at him pulled away from his dick, ‘upstairs’ I said, ‘I'm your new manager’ I said. He gulped and smiled, ‘ok sir’ he said. He stood up and I saw him better, ‘nice’ I said. He grabbed my ass, ‘I'd like a piece of that’. He followed me upstairs and into the admin area. I locked the door.

 That was it. We both let go of every inhibition.  We were all over each other in each others mouths ass nothing was left untouched. He took off his T to reveal a tattooed torso. I licked at those pecs and then enjoyed the days old stink from his pits, licking them clean.

 Off came his boots and socks. My head went straight into the boots pulling his foot stink into my nose and lungs. It was hypnotic, the socks were unbelievable, male hormone leather and foot smell. I decided to pull off his leather jeans. He was wearing thermals underneath. It wasn’t long before I had them off him and against my nose. He followed quickly by stripping me naked,after that it was body against body.

 He was lying on the sofa legs apart when I decided to stand over him and lower my ass onto that huge dick. He held my waist and guided me on. In seconds he was in me. Pushing hard as I bobbed up and down. I knew he was close due to the breathing and clenched my ass muscles, he came floods in side me, grunting and moaning

 I collapsed on top of him and cuddled in. He did the same. 

After 10 mins or so he got up and went to sit at my desk.  ‘Feels good’ he said, ‘how do I look?’

 I smiled at him picked up my briefs, and threw them at him. ‘You need to dress the part,’ I said. I walked over to him put my hand on his balls and said ‘but first let's get this off you’.

 I went to his dick and removed his cock ring, putting it on my own dick and balls, then the silver neck chain over his head and onto mine then his rings. 

 ‘Better dress the part’ he said.  He rushed to pull my briefs over his dick and balls, then the vest. I passed him my shirt trousers, socks, shoes and jacket, and watched him as he dressed. He was so excited.

 ‘How do you feel ‘I said, as he rubbed himself all over,’ just perfect’ he said with a smile on his face. ‘I’m the boss now and I need a biker’s dick in my ass. I want to take it over my desk’.

 I was taken aback but an offer like that can’t be refused. I moved toward him dick erect. I said ‘I’m a biker’, he said ‘put your gear on first’.

 I didn't need to be told twice and so his thermals went on my legs over my butt and encased my dick. The socks were next followed by the leather jeans. I zipped them up, felt them I was so damn horny. Then the trail boots filthy from wear went on went both my feet and got buckled up.

There was only his BO stenched black T which I pulled over my head. I was the biker now.

 ‘So boss’ I said ‘get you ass over here’. He stood up came round the desk and started to kiss me. I spun him around put my hands around his waist and undid his belt, unzipped him and let his pants fall down. I pulled down his briefs and undid my leather jeans manoeuvred my dick through the thermals pushed him face first down onto his desk. His ass was in the air. I slowly pushed my dick head against it and slowly and gradually moved in up to the hilt. I started to pull in and out then faster becoming more violent.

 He moaned in ecstasy. I was so hot I could smell his scent mingling with mine from the T shirt, and suddenly I just burst and cum flowed into his guts as I totally emptied my load. I dropped on top of him. Held him, and pulled out.

 He was just elated as was I. He pulled up the trousers and sat at my desk. 

‘Fucking incredible man I could enjoy this office, being the boss’, he said.,  ‘go get your jacket, helmet, gloves and reflective from the locker room biker man, then come back up and service your boss’ he said.  ‘They are on the bench’.

 ‘Yes boss’ I said, which excited him. I went down to the locker room, loving the feel of his jeans and boots.

 The rest of his gear was there. I pulled on his fleece which stunk of sweat, then the leather jacket. Zipped myself in and attached it to the jeans.  Fuck it felt good. His hi vis tabard and radio were next, and then I pulled his helmet over my head, and then started to pull, on the gloves. 

 Suddenly the door burst open.  I jumped, ‘Where the fuck have you been Dave’ Dan the controller shouted, ‘get the fuck on that bike Dave, I have an urgent pick up’. He gave me a ticket. ‘Get a fucking move on he screamed’.

 I had no choice I grabbed my gloves and headed out to the bike. He believed I was Dave. 

 The keys were in it. I started it up, entered the details into the sat nav pulled on the gloves and rode off

 It was about 4am, freezing cold and the rain was belting down. Ages since it rode a bike but his gear felt so warm and soft on my skin. I rode for 30mins feeling more erotic, and more at home in his gear. I walked in as a courier and picked up a parcel the guy gave me. He gave me an address for delivery. I put it in the satnav and headed off for the delivery. Before I did it I called into control to let Dan know.

 Before I set off, I got a call from the real Dave. ‘Where the fuck are you’ he said. I explained. ‘What do I do’ he said ‘people will arrive in a couple of hours.’ He was shit scared.  ‘Go to my place .car keys in top drawn it’s the BMW outside. I gave him my address. I was due to be off for a few days.

 It was 530 when it delivered the parcel. I was soaked, but it was so damn sexual and the smell from his gear incredible. The leathers were so tight on me must be the rain I thought.

 I reported to control. I was off at 6 so they told me to go home. I was exhausted

 It was two hours to my place. I was soaked the weather was worse. I wondered where he lived. I rang he answered 

 ‘I'm fucking soaked and freezing’ I said in a gruffer voice than normal, must be the cold. , ‘welcome to my life man’ he replied. ‘I’m in old street, where do u live I cant ride 2 hours in this rain’ I said, he replied. ‘Your ten mins away’ ‘Thank heavens, I’ll go to your place and come over to tomorrow’   ‘ok’ he said, he sounded different. 

 ‘Have u been drinking’ I shouted, ‘yep nice place here’ he said’ just be careful in my place’ I retorted ‘Great body’ he said, ‘what’ I responded, I didn’t know what he meant.  I felt the rain coming through on my chest, and my beard was rubbing on my helmet. Beard? I just put the thought away and headed to his place.

  I parked the bike and headed upstairs to the flat. I found the keys in an outside pocket of the soaked leather jacket. I got inside and started to undress. Helmet. Came off my head, I pulled the gloves off finger by finger, as they stuck to me. Totally sodden. The, soaked, jacket, was unzipped, and fell down my shoulders. Then the damp stinking fleece came away from my chest, then my BO covered t-shirt, I was naked on top and cold. I rushed to remove the boots, full of water; my feet were freezing, then my thermals and socks. I left them all n a pile in the hallway and headed to the bedroom. I saw the bed through the darkness and just jumped in.

 ‘Your fucking freezing’, came a shout from a woman. ‘Fuck’ I said. I pulled the duvet over my head and my ring caught in my hair, hair?  I curled up and she came over and wrapped herself around me. ‘Poor bugger’ she said ‘let's warm you up’. I was terrified she would notice I wasn’t Dave, but I felt best to just stay there and be quiet.  I felt her breasts against my back. Fucking hell, what is going to happen when she sees me and realises I'm not Dave. 

 It felt so good as she as she cuddled in. I went to sleep. The next minute, which must have been hours later, as it was daylight, she was sitting on the bed looking at me with a hot drink. I was shocked she accepted me. I took the drink and as I looked at my hands they were different tattooed, ‘fucking hell’ I said to myself. I put down the drink and walked naked to a mirror. I was shocked I was him it was his face his body. I felt his longer hair his beard, he was a hard biker. I could see the tats on my arms and chest, I was him, My dick started to harden as I felt myself. I liked it.

 ‘How, why’. I was stunned. She came and wrapped herself around me. ‘You still as gorgeous’ she said as she pulled me to the bed, pushed me down, and undressed.

 She was on me in seconds working my dick which responded. I felt her breasts and soon I turned her over and was fucking her for dear life.

 This new body responded to her touch feel and smell like nothing I've ever felt it was so erotic.

 I spent the rest of the day sleeping knowing that I had to get myself over to my own house that evening. The more time I spent in this body as Dave the more I liked it and I decided that maybe keeping it for a few extra days wouldn't harm anyone and will allow him a little bit of luxury in my place.

 She dropped off all of my leathers and so I took the opportunity of putting the same on and telling her I was going out for a ride.

 ‘Can I come’ she said. ‘yes babe’ I replied. I was starting to talk like him. Out came a cig and I started to smoke as I pulled on all my gear.  she disappeared to get ready and when she came out she was dressed head-to-toe in tight black leather with stilettos heels. I couldn't believe it she I couldn't believe it she was incredible. I grabbed her around the waist as we walked down to the bike. I was heading out into the country speeding all the way eventually stopping at a small coffee bar next to some Woods.

 We had something to eat and drink all the time she's rubbing her leg on mine under the table I felt it was time we took a walk the wooded area.

 When we got in there she started kiss me. I was a lot taller than her. So I lifted her up my placing my arms under her legs and pulling her upwards against the tree. She was now level with my face. I took my hand and unzipped her leather jeans which had its zip from back to front

 I was kissing her I gradually unzipped my leather jeans my erect dick pushing in her direction till I found her hole. I pounded her against the tree and she enjoyed every second moaning with Delight.

 I came deep inside of her we lay down on the ground and chatted she said that I seemed different. I asked ‘was good or bad?’ ‘very good ‘she said. after that we walked back to the bike and headed back to the flat

 I received a call from Dave. He told me how much you was enjoying his new richer life and would I be prepared to stay in his place for a little longer.

  I immediately said yes as I was quite enjoying the change he started to laugh

 I came to realise that the change was created by exchanging clothes and getting the sweat of the other person on me. I wondered if he had ever done this before. He told me it was a regular event between himself and his girlfriend. I was shocked, he had been her? He told me how erotic it was and how much she liked it. It was only his body that could do it.

  I couldn't believe what I just heard.  That night I asked her if she wanted to change and she said yes.  She loved to have a dick to fuck with again and so she began to gradually undress and I did the same.

 I took out a joint and had a beer in my hand as I sat and watched the show. She slowly and sensually started to undress. The bedroom was dimly lit and she was high. She sat on the floor in front of me and lifted one leg. Resting her stiletto boot on my knee. I moved forward and found the zip near her vagina and started to slowly pull it down to the sole of her boot, he leg slipped out. My nose immediately went into the boot.

 I did the same with the second one putting it to the side. She stood up in front of me as she turned around and asked me to untie the Basque. I did, it fell to the floor.

 My dick was just raging; I stood up and rubbed myself against her. ‘It will soon be yours Dave she said, ‘all yours’ you can then be fucked so hard. She rubbed her leathered hands over her huge ass and crotch. Smiling at me. ‘you want’ yes yes’ I said.

 ‘unzip me’ she said. I put my hand up to her neck and started to pull the zipper down on the one piece. Right down to her privates. I pushed the leather over her shoulders and unzipped the small zips at her wrists and pulled it off her arms it dropped open near her ass. She was wearing a leather bra, which was filled with her ample breasts.

 She sat on the bed, as I pulled the one piece past her ass and off her legs, I knew id be in it soon, and I was as hard as iron seeping precum.

She undid her stockings and rolled them down her legs throwing them as me. I caught them, then the suspender belt came off and now the leather knickers. ‘These are yours now’ she said. I lit any another joint, and keep drinking. ‘I want to be fucked in your body ‘I screamed.

 ‘Get you gear off man, its mine now’ she said ‘OK OK and I hurried to strip down naked. She smacked my dick and said ‘Ill be using that soon’,

 ‘help me off with my bra she said’. I undid the clasp and she pulled the leather bra off. Sit on the bed she said, and from behind me she put my arms through the bra, it rested on my chest too small for me but soon my chest began to change, it got smaller in girth and started to produce women’s breasts, that started to fill the bra. The nipples were so damn sensitive and I moaned as she fastened the clasp.

  She picked up her knickers and passed them to me and I put my leg through them and pull them up over my massive dick. It started to disappear and I became thinner as the knickers started to fall into place on my body. I was in an other world. She stood behind me and put the suspender belt on me, my hips changed to fit them. She then moved to the floor and put a stocking on my left foot which immediately reshaped itself and rolled them up attaching them to the belt. I couldn’t move or do anything it was like a permanent orgasm. She then did the other leg, and I could see I was now becoming her.

 She passed me her one-piece leather she had been wearing it was very tight on her and showed her ass. I put my legs into the leather and pushed my left leg down and it went in really easy because of the nylons.

 I could feel myself getting thinner and smaller and more curvaceous she came up behind me to help me to pull up the leather one piece so it was over my shoulders and I slid my new arms into it.  I then pulled the zip all the way up from my new vagina up past my new huge tits and up to my neck

 she then placed the Basque around my waist and started to lace it so it pulled my waist in making my ass look bigger it felt so so good. the rest was down to me as she was dressing in my gear.  I picked up this stilettos and with the right one I pushed my new foot into it and pulled it right way up to my waist I got hold of the zip and pulled it up.  I did exactly the same with the other leg.

 I picked up her leather jacket and gloves and pulled them on. Was this real, I felt all over my new body, the tight leather, inside was incredible the feelings.  

 I walked over to the mirror and I saw her reflection, not Dave’s I had changed places so what Dave had said was true. I sat down somewhat shocked enjoying the new experience and watching her dress as me and gradually her looks her body her size all changed she was now the new Dave.

 She (or he) wanted to go out on the bike again, this time to be in control to go to the same place and follow through with the same fuck session this afternoon, but she would be in control and I would be the one against the tree.

 I was more than happy to oblige, I wanted to know how it felt.  I followed him down to the bike, the new tight leathers rubbing my sensitive skin. Mt breasts we just so erotic as they moved in the bra and the leather knickers just slid backward and forward with my precum. I sat on the back for the first time and placed my arms around his waist. it was so sensual as I rested my breasts on his back

 What an incredible experience when we got there, he helped me off the bike holding my ass as we went into the woods. It wasn’t easy walking in stilettos so he held me close, This body was reacting. When we got to the tree, he gently rested me against it, kissing me as he rubbed my breasts. I had my leathered hand on his leather dick and gradually unzipped him and pulled it out. I licked his precum from my leather glove as we kissed.  His hands went in-between my legs and held my thighs lifting me off the ground so my vagina was opposite his erect dick, I pulled down my zip and pulled out my new breasts and then pushed the zip right down so it was opened right to my ass.

 the next minute his huge dick found the target, I was in ecstasy waiting for an experience no man has ever had. He started to push and his head slid into me, My head went backwards in ecstasy as he pushed it right up to the hilt. After that he was backward and forward in and out till he shots loads inside of me and I orgasmed.  my first female orgasm.

 The whole experience was incredible; I understand why these two do this regularly. No way was I going to give this up.

We rode home, stripped off, returned to ourselves and got absolutely drunk and drugged.

All this time the real Dave was texting me. I ignored it. He was wondering where I was. Fuck him; I’m not going back to what I was. I’m Dave and I’m not changing back.

[x-samdrew-x]

Day One: Manchester, UK to Faro, Portugal.

After a very very very early start to the day (4am wake up call and a 7am flight), we relaxed on a fairly smooth flight to Faro airport in Portugal. We then arrived at Faro and was picked up by our transfer to be driven privately to our 4 star hotel in Quarteira. As our room was not ready when we arrived, we decided to go for a stroll along the beach, which was a few yards from our hotel.  For lunch, we stopped off at a cute little beach cafe, struggling to understand the menu and acting a little shy (maybe a bit more than a little for Sammy, haha), we sat down and ordered food from the English menu. Sammy had a mushroom omelette served with chips and a homemade apple juice (which tasted and looked more like banana...). Andrew had a cheese and ham omelette  also served with chips, with a homemade orange juice (which was actually orange...)  As time went on (all of 15 minutes of arriving in Quarteira, including sitting down to eat) Sammy had caught the sun... a lot. Or maybe maybe thats just an understatement. Her arm and shoulder was completely red, like a tomato... Andrew’s neck was nowhere near as bad as Sammy.  After lunch, it was time to see the room we were staying in for 3 nights. First impressions we got.. the hotel lobby was very glamorous. Staff was friendly and helpful, We used the lift to our floor. We opened our room door, and saw 2 twin beds, not a double like we booked, so instead of annoying anyone, we make do by pushing them together. We looked in the bathroom, couldn't find the bath/shower at first but we found it in a very peculiar place, almost hidden from sight. Bad design!! We got changed into something a little more suited to the hot weather, and went out for another walk with our cameras, taking photos of the scenery along the way. We suddenly got caught up in the local festival all over the streets, we stood and watched in amazement with smiles on our faces, as people, all ages, dressed up in colourful and crazy outfits parading the road, throwing the sweets at the children (but adults took most of them, hahaha). After festival parade calmed down, we walked along the Portuguese sands taking photos of the beach and the sea and each other (whether we allowed in or not..) We let the sea run into our barefooted toes. We decided to sit on some rocks watching the waves flow back and forth in a peaceful motion. It had been such a long and busy day being very relaxing and soaking up the sun in the process (quite literally for Sammy) we decided to grab a drink from the beach cafe as we were very thirsty but not hungry yet. The beach cafe was literally on the beach, a few feet away from the tide which we watched while taking a sip from our very refreshingly cold beverages (just trying to be posh - that’s ‘drinks’ for those who aren't posh.. hahaha!) :)  When a few hours had passed, we fell tired and felt it was best to grab something to eat and get an early night. Due to tiredness, we both found it difficult to decided from a variety of nice restaurants along the promenade. After much debate, we decided to go to a place that seemed very popular - a italian style restaurant. Sammy had a extremely spicy pepperoni pizza - a bit too spicy for Sammy (again an understatement). Andrew had a peculiar pizza which contained cheese, pepperoni and.... fried eggs - Yes, Eggs!!! (no surprise there that he goes for something....different. We left the restaurant feeling full and shattered but also disappointed with our food as is was something neither of us had expected. We went back to the hotel, gaining some well needed fresh air to calm down from our unusual foods. During the night, Andrew was subject to severe vomiting, which we put down to either food poisoning or travel sickness or even both. Understandably, Sammy was very worried. as she had never seem him this ill before.. :( :( The rug at the bottom of the bed was covered in Andrews sick and smelt vile, which even made Sammy feel sick. We rang reception asking them to clean it up at 7:30 am, in which they said they would come up at 8 am which was the time they started, however we had to ring up a few times more, complaining, and eventually a hotel cleaner came to our room to clean it up and replace the rug (after 10 am!!!! 2 and a half hours later!!)  Once it was cleaner, it smelt a lot better, but of course Andrew was still feeling ill, and we decided to rest a while longer before trying to enjoy the day.  Andrew: Surprisingly warm, and picturesque beach. Felt like I was in a different world, so peaceful, if only I had felt 10 times better than I did that night. Overall, quite impressed with the surroundings and scenery, I just wish I could say that about the the staff for not cleaning up at the time they said they would. I deeply regret having the fried egg pizza at the Italian style restaurant on the promenade as I wonder if it would be a different outcome if we hadn't gone to that restaurant. I feel sorry for Sammy for ruining the rest of the day as I feel like it was my felt through picking that pizza.  Sammy: Such a lovely day (apart from the early wake up call of course). Leaving Manchester in the pouring rain and arriving in Portugal in the hot sunny weather. Lunch was amazing, especially Apple (Nahh, I mean banana..) juice. hahaha!! Didn't particularly enjoy being turned into a tomato after the first 15 minutes, but I guess thats the difference in climate for you. Overall I was awestruck by the peaceful surroundings and the beautiful views. I just wish we weren't as tired as we were that evening so we could have enjoyed our food a lot better and relaxed more at night, but I guess thats what travel does to you. I am very sorry for how Andrew was feeling after those awful pizzas, and gave him loads and loads of hugs and kisses to comfort him.  

[nblahova]

Three Days

21.03.2020

I’m sitting in the kitchen of my grandparents' old apartment. I’m alone, and will, with no exception, stay alone for the next 14 days. I’m wearing my flowery kimono, listening to jazz, drinking Turkish coffee. My brain is full of the happenings of past days. The worst three days of my life.

On 17th March I was still in Amsterdam, the city that’s been home of mine for past 6,5 years. I decided to pause my part-time job and to stay at home as much as possible. My health condition puts me in risk group and I assumed taking distance from everyone is the most responsible, not just for myself but for the others too. I planned on waiting it through at home, and i felt safe, felt good. I thought how exciting it is to be told to take it slow, to read, watch movies, hopefully start planning and making work for my upcoming solo show in June.

I’ve questioned my position in Amsterdam in past months, especially after I graduated. I’ve never been very nationalistic in sense of thinking that my home country is the best place for me. However, after finishing art school I slowly started to play with the idea of moving back - I missed the nature, I missed the real grown food in our countryside home, I thought artists maybe have it a little lighter and easier over there. Over past months I’ve been switching between “I need to go back”, “I’m scared to go back” and “I cannot let myself go back”. Oh, how irrelevant those thoughts and feelings are now! No one would have thought we all appear in strange times like these.

I’ve been subletting a house from a girl, who went on Erasmus to Prague. On 17th March she called me saying her studies have been cancelled and she has to return back to The Netherlands. She packed her bags and went back home the following day. At this point the pressure from my family was real strong - they wanted me back in Slovakia no matter what - and the chances to return were already limited. We made a quick decision to pack my stuff in the boxes (after 6 weeks of living there), pack my suitcases and book the very last flight to Vienna. I was lucky to get the very last seat on that plane, knowing that the airport would shut down the same day at midnight. I cried and cried, thinking how unfair and unfortunate it is, how nothing worse can happen to me. Leaving my life behind (in boxes), leaving my love, my friends. I cried as my boyfriend dropped me off at Amsterdam airport, I cried in the departure hall. I spent an hour waiting in line to get my suitcase checked in. People were nervous, there was an obvious fear in the hall. Almost like the one I remember from those times of terrorist attacks. I could sense everyone feeling vulnerable, unsafe.

When I finally got to check in desk, the lady behind cheerfully congratulated me on being able to take the last plane ever. We laughed about my suitcase being just 22.9kg, and how I managed to pack my life for unknown future within the allowed limit. Just after I handed her my passport she looked at the computer screen and went “Hopla. New update.” It must have been around 12:40 around that time. Apparently, just minutes before someone has decided to allow only Austrian citizens on this plane. None of this was mentioned on any websites around that time (I kept thoroughly checking Amsterdam Schiphol airport website, Vienna Schwechat airport website, KLM airline website). I was rejected. Explaining how Vienna airport is actually where all Slovaks fly, how close it is to our borders and how every other country surrounding Slovakia is shut down was of no use. I was not allowed to board this plane. I took all my belongings, went outside and just cried. People laughed at me for wearing a mask, people took distance not understanding why this young woman, with latex gloves on, cries so hard.

Normally I work well in emergency situations, but this time I felt caged. I didn’t know what to do, I couldn’t name what I wanted. I thought that maybe going back to Slovakia isn’t so bad, now that I’ve been rejected.

To make it a little more clear for the ones who don’t know - probably one of the worst fears of us young Slovaks is being banned from travelling. The past is still too present of how our parents and grandparents have been locked down in one country for decades. We were raised thinking this cannot happen to us, ever again. We were encouraged to move, to value it, to enjoy it, to really use the freedom they never had. Slovakia might be politically unstable, but one thing we try to protect is the freedom of movement, of speech, of act. We cannot let ourselves go backwards in this one.

But this fight is of a different kind. It’s a war led by a virus. It doesn’t care about the politics, nor about the borders or passports. At the same time, the measurements most of the countries took are political for many. Not being able to get back to my homecountry is something I would have never ever imagined. Not being able to work out one little hole in the system, where I could let myself through. Being too alone to deal with this, with noone being able to help me.

The plane I was supposed be on departed and I was back again in my, now former, house. I called the Slovak embassy, where they suggested to sign up for repatriation. The word I have learnt just a few days ago. And yes, it’s as serious as it sounds. Slovak government has arranged transportation of Slovaks who wish to get back. (The estimated amount of Slovaks abroad is around 250 000, of barely 6mil. citizens). I was told to register and wait for a confirmation email. In this case, they wouldn’t confirm everyone. They would prioritise people based on their age, health state, and reason why they are abroad and why they need to return. I was approved within 2 hours. The bus would leave the next day, filled with other citizens, most likely also the infected ones. We would have to sign a document, where we declare that we will suffer (the actual English translation of the word they used) though obligatory quarantine in a place set up by government. There we would spend next 14 days, waiting to be tested and if proven negative, we would be allowed to go home to continue the self-isolation. These places are in different cities around the country, empty buildings or hotels, hosting 3-5 people in one room, banned from leaving the room at all. For people of risk group like me this would mean almost no chance to avoid getting infected too. At this point I had only two choices - to stay in Amsterdam, to be potentially homeless, for sure jobless, not knowing when and how this all ends, and therefore financially unprepared - or to go back to Slovakia and take the risk of getting very ill.

I was lucky enough to get in contact with one Slovak, who has been rejected to board that plane too. This was a pure coincidence of my mother calling their neighbours, who’s friends have a son studying in Amsterdam. We spoke on the phone and feared the transport as well as the obligatory quarantine. But there wasn’t any other way.

Almost by the time I made peace with getting ill, something has happened. Czech government has allowed Slovak citizens to transit through their country. Up until then there was a ban for all international citizens, including Slovaks (which again, something we would have never thought, after being Czechoslovakia for so long). We booked an early morning plane to Prague and waited. My boxes were packed, stored in the attic of my former house, my suitcase filled with my much needed medicine for upcoming 6-12 months.

I got to the airport at 4am, being let through check in at around 5am. First victory. Us Slovaks waited nervously at the gate, not knowing whether they let us through. When the plane started to board, I was stopped because my passport wasn’t Czech. At this point I was ready to go through dead bodies (Slovak saying). I showed them my declaration of just transiting through Czech republic. They probably didn’t have time to check the new updates and let me through. The plane was full in the back, however empty in front. Just a few people sat there, with approximate distance of 3m from each other. I believe these were either infected, or just waiting for the results. We were told not to move to empty seats in any case.

The plane landed. We got out and as the Schengen zone is closed now, had to be checked at security. (Again, unimaginable thing for us Slovaks in our former home country). Two of us were let through, me and the guy weren’t. We were handed a paper that said “No tourists, no internationals.” No matter what out history is, on paper we are internationals now. They took out passports, the declarations and we waited again. They let us go after 15 minutes, stating strictly how we need to exit the country as soon as possible. We had booked a car, but as Czechia is locked down, all car rentals were closed. We were lucky enough that the company we have chosen had one extra car to be moved to Slovakia. We got this car and drove away. Usually it’s about 3,5h drive from Prague to Bratislava. Roads were full of international trucks, who mostly drove both on left and right lane, blocking us from passing. Before we reached Czech-Slovak borders we got stuck in about 25km traffic - one lane, filled with truck drivers who have probably been there for hours already. Rudely we drove past them and reached the borders. Police stopped us. We told them we’re Slovaks and need to get back home. They escorted us towards Slovak border. Then Slovak police stopped us. We didn’t leave the car, but been tested for body temperature. We had to give out our personal information including our ID number, phone number and the address where we will stay next 14 days. We were told not to leave the house, not even to take the garbage out. The police joked about three boys being in one quarantine together and me alone and separate, and how more enjoyable it would be for them to have a woman around. I had to bite my tongue, but this was not a situation to fight sexism. They let us through.

Boys drove me to this apartment where my father already waited, wearing gloves and a face mask. We couldn’t hug or touch, but I could see how relieved he was to have me back. My family has prepared the apartment for me, filled with food and sweet little messages and pictures laying around. I put on jazz music and went for a cigarette on my balcony. Spring equinox, 21 degrees outside. My only touch with outside will be this balcony for upcoming 14 days, but I couldn’t feel happier and safer in that very moment. I made it.

I’m shaky writing this down. The trauma I have from past days will be hard to get over. My worst nightmares happened all in just two short days.

When being rejected from the plane (and not knowing that this would get even worse) someone who heard about my story called me “an adult woman that should be able to deal with this on her own”. That is a mind of someone privileged enough to say such thing. Someone that has never appeared in this situation where their rights and freedoms were taken away. And I pray for them to never ever experience this.

Hopefully this virus will change something in people’s mind, finally understanding the struggles many face daily - immigrants, people living in war zones, people being discriminated based on their nationality or ethnicity. When someone as privileged as me can end up like this - how about the one’s that have been limited way before this virus took over? I’m angry remembering all these people in Amsterdam laughing at me two weeks ago when I said the situation is serious. The ones laughing at me for wearing a mask, those organising corona parties or brunching in city centre every day instead of home-office working. The ones that said this is just a flu and it cannot hit us, white Western people. Because nothing can touch us, right? Oh, and please forbid if our economy gets affected. Our comfort and luxury.

I know much and many will be affected by this. Some will loose their jobs, become poor. Some will die. There’s no way to joke about this anymore. It’s too late. We have to develop new way of being, of discipline, we have to start working together, for ourselves and everyone else. To follow maybe strict rules given by governments, to simplify our way of living and consuming. The change is needed. I wish for the best to all of us, for strong health and for being able to overcome these days, weeks, possibly months. We’re in this together.

NB

[steveramsdale]

8.7 The ‘Before I go Home’ Blog

8.7 The ‘Before I go Home’ Blog

As you read this, I will be heading home! I am going to see Mairi and Freddie! I might be in the air, in Istanbul, in Manchester, in Ben’s car or home. But before that, I’ll blog you about the week. Yes, I just used ‘blog’ as the main verb in my sentence.

I spent much of Saturday working on the van myself, getting everything ready for my first camping trip. I needed some curtains if I was going to be able to sleep. I had a plan to us the reflective material that is used to keep cars cool when parked in the sunshine. I had bought a roll of this. I had brought magnetic tape and ‘window suckers’ back with me. I was ready to go. Over about two hours, I got some curtains made. I am not the most talented maker of things but the ‘curtains’ kind of fit. After the jobs, including putting the driver’s seat belt back in, I had to do some cleaning. By midday I had done and was ready for the off - my First Trip. The plan was to go back to NBU, where Mairi and I used to live, and park on a friend/colleague’s drive. This would be safe and convenient, a good place to see how this van life would work out. The neighbours were very interested. Some had not seen the van before. Some had not seen it since the work had been done, so I had lots of visitors. There is now a puppy that has been adopted by everyone. It also came to see me and is very friendly and cute. I did not see кошка.

Overall, the camping trip was very successful. I was able to make hot drinks and prepare tea and breakfast. The issues for our drive home will be storage and toileting. We need solutions! There was one very interesting consequence of sleeping in the van. I slept later than ever! For a long time now, I have taken to waking up early, very early. Most mornings, at home and here, on weekdays and at weekends, I wake up at around 4am. More often that not, it is between 3:45 and 4:15. On Sunday morning, when I woke up, it was 6:30. I have no explanation for this. The bed is very comfortable. The curtains stop people seeing in but do not keep out the light. So, I don’t know….. There was one uninvited guest - who buzzed around my ear and bit my face - a mosquito.

I had one other job to do on Saturday. Amazingly, I got lost on the way home (driving) I don’t know how I ended up at the station.

On Sunday, I went for diesel and a drive. Apart from our ill-fated ‘trip’ to Kazakhstan, I have only done short, purposeful, journeys around the city, so I decided that I should give the engine a bit of a run. If I do break down, I would like it to be not too far from home and my mechanic.

The hot water’s off! I was aware that this happens in the flats when the pipes are cleaned, or maintenance is done - the hot water is sent to the apartment blocks from a central point. This week and into next week, it is my turn.

On Wednesday, for the first time, my whole class was together! One boy has had a problem with his leg and so has missed about four weeks of the term. He came back and everyone else was present, too. It lasted for two days!

Cat in school! When I arrived at school on Wednesday morning, a cat came tearing out of the building, perhaps hearing me arrive. I don’t know if it had been in all night or was just having a look around.

On Thursday evening, the new British Ambassador hosted his “welcome to Uzbekistan’ evening. It was strange to go the the Residence and for the previous family not to be there. We had got to know them well and it is ‘their’ house!

We have a small football pitch as part of our playground. Each break time, one staff member is the ‘referee. I do this regularly. One day this week, two boys were playing as a team against about eight other boys. At one point, they got a throw-in. One had the ball, the other was putting his hand up, indicating that he wanted the ball throw to him. I wondered, and indeed asked, ‘Who else is he going to throw it to?’.

This week, on Thursday, in fact, I started wearing proper socks again. By which I mean I have stopped wearing trainer socks. Yes, the weather is slightly on the turn.

I have also been part of a viral video – sort of, well a few people have seen it. I was walking through the park I have previously mentioned – eco-park – and ahead I could see two young women talking to a young man. One of the women did the splits in the middle of the path, then they were talking. The man walked away as I reached where they were. The ‘do the splits’ girl then started talking to me and I saw that the other one was filming on her phone. She seemed to be asking if I could do the splits. I reported that, in fact, I could not. She showed me how to do but this demonstration did not grant me the ability to do it/them. I think they realised I was not a local and asked where I was from. After a very brief chat, I continued with my walk home. I thought that the video they were making would be online somewhere but that I would never see it. The next day, at school, a couple of students in the sixth form were keen to tell me that I was famous and proceeded to show me the video which one of them had seen in Instagram! It’s a strange world!

And that’s it. I’m typing this on Friday evening as I am soon going to head to the airport for a night of flying. I’ll be home by mid-day Saturday. So, choose when to read. See you next time.