#thats depressing! like sure they may all make it past 25 but then we get to 30 and it just gets less and less.....

[lixbf]

...... how did all of this start with me just wanting to quickly write down how old a few thg characters were during the last ten games. why did my brain decide i need to figure out for myself how old various other tributes and victors were when they died/won. why am i now here multiple hours later looking at an ugly monster of an excel sheet with 50ish characters sorted by birthday with their ages/ages at death as they correspond to each year's hunger games, another sheet of all 75 hunger games with known victors and their lifespans inserted into it because i wanted to see just the victors but also how much time is between some of the named victors, yet another sheet where i wanted to see how the victors' ages at winning compare to see how common i made each winning age but then i also used that sheet to figure out how many victors made it to different ages (which like btw is kinda depressing bc so many of them didnt even make it past 40), and then fucking finally an excel sheet of what i originally wanted to look at aka the ages of a few characters in the last few games except i included way more characters than i originally wanted to and also started at the 60th games instead of the 65th like i wanted to

[elfdyke]

wow thanks! that was a really in depth post about it you make good points! when I played I definitely got the sense that monika had encouraged sayori to kill herself and I didn’t get the sense of any remorse when natsuki or yuri died or got fucked up but I guess u do make some good points there about how she was just trying to make them less desirable rather than kill them. I’m new to the game and the fandom so im not super familiar with everything yet but is there anything in the canon or lore that points away from monika having pushed sayori to commit suicide or is it mostly just fan theories and personal readings? either way thank u so much for answering!

yes i can absolutely find you some info on that!

there's quite a bit of information hidden within the games files, so I'm kind of assuming if you're new to the game, that you might not have seen these things? so ill dive into them too!

I'm gona do this under the cut so i can like, dissect things from the game !

(also i found stuff thats specifically pointing away from her meaning actual harm/death for Both yuri and sayori, jsyk)

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.txt (discovered in game files during act 2)

“All I want is for you to hate them. Why is that so hard.”

not, all i want for them is to die. she doesnt want to kill them. she wants to separate us from them so we are with Her, not them. things spiral out of control, but it was never her intention for things to get this bad. ntm its repeated over and over in this game how badly monika wants to die. she's hanging on by a thread, keeping on only because she wants to be with us, to be in contact with reality. this leads to really unfortunate circumstances but i really strongly believe everything in the text alludes to the fact she did Not want things to get this bad

ACT 3 INTRO:

(im copy pasting a transcript of the monologue here, but this is taken from the very beginning of act 3, which you can see in this video starting at 25:56)

imo this is all the proof needed to show that she really had no intention of ‘killing’ sayori and yuri. things spiraled out of control far beyond what she was capable of handling. 

her goals with making sayori more depressed and yuri more obsessive were, in here words “to just try to make them as unlikable as possible”. she didnt want her friends to brutally die!! she loved them q_q i feel like a lot of people really dont look at this specific part of what she says and take it to heart. its very telling for her character and important for understanding what she does and why she does it

ACT 3 MONOLOGUES:

sayori's hanging (cw: graphic descriptions of suicide)

dialogue of importance:

"I was thinking about Sayori earlier... I still wish I could have handled that whole thing a little more tactfully."

+

"Come to think of it, it was probably less 'changing her mind' and more just her survival instincts kicking in." "So you can't really fault her for that." "It's easier to think that she probably wouldn't have changed her mind anyway, right?" "It's not healthy to think about the things you could have done differently." "So just remember that even though you could have saved her, it's technically not your fault she killed herself." "I may have exacerbated it a little bit, but Sayori was already mentally ill." "Still, though..." "I wonder how things would be if you and I just started dating from the get-go?" "I guess we'd all still be in the clubroom, writing poems and having fun together." "But what's the point when none of it is even real?" "I mean, it's the same ending either way, right?"

ok so whats important here, is monika is essentially using us, the player, as a mirror in act 3? the things she says i believe, very strongly show her sense of uncertainty in her actions, and her fears of what if she could have done something else??

"even though you could have saved her, its technically not your fault she killed herself" reads SO much to me like shes trying to comfort herself with this, she doesnt want it to be her fault. nothings real, sayori's a character in a game. but she wishes so badly they could have just been normal girls living together.

happy end poem

OK SO LIKE. this is actual proof of Why she does everything she does. she's scared if she reaches out and tells us she's trapped in a game, we'll stop playing, we'll kill her. she tinkers with the game, trying to make herself look the best, trying to make us choose her, and nothing works. and this leads to her becoming frustrated and scared, and screwing with the game more and more desperately trying to do anything to save herself.

if you recall, in act 2, she gives you a poem which bluescreen the computer. this was actually an attempt she makes to escape the game q_q she never wanted to kill yuri, she never wanted things to escalate like that. she wanted to get out but she had no idea how to program her way out of the game, resulting in everything crumbling around her, and her friends dying.

my own route

hang on this one genuinely makes me so upset.

it very much relates back to how in the conversation about sayori's suicide, she's still clearly thinking about how things could be Different. shes thinking about how they could be normal. "I may not have needed to take such drastic measures to be with you. Maybe the rest of the club would still be around..." , and then immediately trying to convince herself it doesnt matter, and that she doesnt care.

its so so obvious shes hurting and she misses her friends. the additional "i really dont (miss them)" at the end really shows that shes desperately trying to convince herself that it was worth it, that she did everything she should have, and her friends dont matter. but they clearly do matter to her. she loved them (she couldnt even delete them if u recall)

also another important part about this monologue, a lot of people say she killed the other girls out of jealousy, but this shows thats not true??

"I think I would end up forcing you onto my route anyway." "It has less to do with me not having a route, and more to do with me knowing that nothing is real."

this wasnt because shes 'in love' with us. she wanted to be close to something real, something tangible. she's clinging onto us, the player character, like someone lost at sea with a piece of driftwood, doing everything she can to stay afloat

wine

ok this isnt on the surface level as important as the other ones, but literally look at how she talks about this memory.. she misses them so much and talking about this memory she clearly cherishes brings her so much joy. she doesnt belittle any of them, she doesnt talk down on them, she’s just reliving this memory because it makes her happy 

I HOPE THIS HELPS?? im sure theres a few more things im forgetting, but i did my best to scrabble up everything i could to show how monika’s not an evil mastermind, shes a scared girl who didnt realize what she was doing and when things got too bad, she did her best to fix it, only for it to get worse n worse

edit: oh heres the proof that monika always loved the girls and never actually deleted them

:’)

edit 2: haha.. um ouch

“It’s not right for me to miss things that weren’t even real in the first place.” shes forcing herself to try and ignore her feelings for the other girls

[sketchynebula]

Hi! :D I love your fics! I saw your prompt thing, and I was looking through them and thought 25- “I may have accidentally adopted three cats…”- would be perfect for Patton! (Poor boy is allergic, but he still loves them)

 Spontaneity, One-shot:

taglist: @sos-fandoms @peanut0303 @minekitkate @confinesofpersonalknowledge @that-one-transguy @ffsas-side-account @arandomkoalainaustralia @hissesssss @irrelevantspecimen @hamilin-manuel-miranda @insanityandimperfection @idiotauthor @darkle-elkrad @definentlynotjustanotherlemon @blubblubfish @okaybirdboy @halffictional @fandomsailer @thewinterhunter @stressed-and-quite-depressed @thats-so-crash @bbydreamer @threepeppers @prettyraddawg @imsotrancy2 @pikachu-12 @staarpops @grey-lysander @littlespacefin @softestsanderssides @ailithnight @emeraldfoxface @niatsu-fullbuster @seas-space-and-stardust @msu82 @cadefailure @onehundredphans @thesanderspals @nightmarejasmine @ccws18 @heir-of-the-founders

@syndianites @bbydreamer @introverted-fangirl7 - All you guys asked for this so I’m tagging you! #25 (and #3 for introverted-fangirl7)

Content Warning: Cats, some plant smashing

Pairing: Romantic Logicality

Word count: 1,742

Summary: The last time Patton said that, was the day Logan came back to their apartment only to find out that Patton had impulse-bought a house.

“Don’t… be mad.”

Logan’s mouth pinched, his eyes shifting to his phone before he looked back up to the road in front of him.

“Patton, why would I be mad?” Logan asked carefully, slowly.

The last time Patton said that, was the day Logan came back to their apartment only to find out that Patton had impulse-bought a house.

“I may have accidentally adopted three cats…”

Logan exhaled, his eyes rolling upward before pinching shut.

“We’re not keeping them.” He stated simply, voice firm.

“I don’t know- That’s what you said about the house and we’ve been living in it for four years now,”

Logan only groaned, “You-” He sighed, “We’ll talk about this when I get home, I hope that you still have their papers.” He rubbed at the creases in his forehead, mind running over the expenses and responsibilities of owning not one, but multiple cats.

“Alrighty… I love you.”

Logan’s lips quirked up a little, his hand falling back to the wheel.

“I love you too,” he sighed, shaking his head as he turned on his turn signal.

Spontaneity

Logan entered his house to the familiar sight of his husband setting the table for dinner, but as a shot of white darted under his feet the sudden changes to his life were recalled.

“Was that one of the- felines.” Logan sighed out and Patton nodded sheepishly.

“They were all just in a box on the street! What was I supposed to do!” Patton said and Logan shook his head.

“Take them to a shelter. Though I suppose that can’t be helped now. I assume that means they don’t have any papers?” Logan crouched to look under the couch, two beady eyes glaring back at him as a black kitten huddled itself in the corner.

Patton shrugged, “I suppose not.”

“Well, we can take them to a shelter tomorrow and-,”

“No! C’mon they are just so cute!”

“Patton you’re allergic!”

“Only mildly!”

Logan blew a puff of air out of his nose and stood back up, only for the dart of white to shoot across the room again.

“So there’s a black one under the couch, the white one is dashing about- where’s the third one? Over the phone you said there were three-,”

Patton grimaced.

“I had to lock him in our room, he was being quite the trouble maker. he stared stirring things up with the black kitten, the poor guy’s been huddling under the couch since.” Patton moved to place a plate he was holding on the bar in the kitchen before he reached out and grabbed a bowl of cat food that was sitting off to the side, “I’ve tried offering food, catnip, I’ve tried string. The little guy’s not coming out.”

There was a crash coming from their bedroom and Logan groaned a hand coming up to rub at the creases in his forehead as Patton’s mouth twisted.

“Eh, woopsy?”

Logan, marched to their room cracking the door just open enough to slide in before seeing a yellow and black calico cat lying innocently on the bed.

Logan’s eyes narrowed before flickering around, landing on a broken pot on the ground.

Logan groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose.

One of Patton’s hanging plants, broken, on the ground. Dirt. Everywhere.

“Oh, and you think I’ll believe this wasn’t you?” Logan asked at the innocent looking feline before carefully leaving the room making sure to firmly shut the door as he did.  

“Love, where’s the broom?” Logan asked breathlessly and Patton shouted from the kitchen,

“Should be in the coat closet!”

Logan nodded walking back into the hallway and opening the coat closet before moving back in the room.

The calico cat was still where it was before. It’s ears perked up and body folded into a pillow on their bed.

Logan rolled his eyes, as he swept up the broken pieces of pot.

Logan heard the grating creek of rust metal and he turned to see that the calico cat had somehow jumped up on another pot. It’s hand batting at the hook on the ceiling.

“No no no no! Don’t you-,”

It jumped off at the last second, the pot smashing behind it as it jumped back up on the bed, looking at Logan with Innocent eyes like he hadn’t just watched it smash a pot.

“Alright! That’s it! Out!” Logan opened the door and the cat darted out.

Logan puffed out a sad sigh as he saw that it was the lavender that the cat had smashed, that one was Patton’s pride and joy.

Logan grabbed one of the spare pots from under the bed scooping the plants and as much dirt as he could into the pots before pushing them next to a window. He swept up the rest, immediately washing his hands as thoroughly as possible after the clean up job was done.

Logan exited with the broom, slotting it back into the coat closet before walking back out into the living room.

He was finally able to get a look at the the white, long haired cat, as it was basically sprawled out on it’s back bathing in a sunbeam.

“Logan did you let this one out of our room?” Logan’s head craned around the kitchen door to see Patton tensely letting the calico cat rub against his legs.

“It was making a mess! look it’s doing a normal, non-destructive cat thing, it’s fine.”

Patton’s mouth pinched before he shrugged, “yeah alright, he was really… aggressive before… maybe the poor thing was just spooked.”

“Is it a he?”

Patton nodded, “they’re all he’s, though only the white one already had a name.”

Logan raised an eyebrow, “what do you mean by that?”

“Well he had a red collar on that only had the name ‘Roman’ on it so I just made the assumption that that was the cat’s name.” Patton said, and Logan nodded.

“That’s a reasonable extrapolation, and the other two?”

“No names but the calico one doesn’t seem to respond to being called, he’ll just kind of… come to you when he wants i guess.”

Patton shrugged as Logan quirked an eyebrow at that.

“Isn’t that the general scenario with all cats?”

Patton giggled and Logan smirked.

“I’m almost done with dinner, why don’t you get changed and I’ll set out some food bowls for the cats,”

Logan nodded slightly breathless as he went back to their room.

Spontaneity

Logan sat at the table just as Patton placed the last dish down.

The feeling of weight against his leg had Logan looking down to see Roman rubbing against his leg, purring heavily.

“Awwww he wants attention!” Patton cooed and Logan just rolled his eyes.

“He more than likely wants food off the table- which we will not be giving him,” Patton frowned and Logan almost felt bad until he heard another crash come from the living room.

“Oh my god! I have half a mind to take that one to the shelter right now!” Logan stood up, moving to peer into the living room with Patton right behind him.

Lo and behold another hanging pot was broken on the ground right in front of the couch. Dirt in the carpet and a little splattered on the couch.

“Is the black kitty okay?” Patton asked, concern in his voice as he kneeled to look under the couch, “oh he’s not down here anymore-,” Patton sighed standing, “I’ll get the rug cleaner.” He brushed his hands together to get the dirt off his hands before patting his pants down and turning to walk down the hallway.

Logan shook his head.

There was a creak, and a snap before suddenly a black streak was under his legs making him jump a little.

Logan stumbled backward just as another one of Patton’s hanging pots hit the floor right where he was once standing.

The black cat looped behind his legs hiding, his eyes very intently connected with something just above them. Logan followed his gaze to see the calico cat perched up on the highest shelf looking down at the both of them.

Logan huffed stomping over and grabbing the scruff of the calico cat’s neck. Yanking it upward and holding it away from his body.

He stomped through the hallway,

“Excuse me,” Logan said as he push past Patton, voice not holding the anger he had well as the cat squirmed in his grip. Patton leaned forward letting Logan pass as he got the vacuum and rug cleaner out.

“what happened?” Patton asked a hand coming up to brush a strand of Logan’s hair out of his face.

“I’m locking this little delinquent in the bathroom where it can’t do any more damage,” Patton nodded resuming his work as Logan walked past him. Opening the bathroom door before he placed the cat on the toilet, getting out and closing the door as quickly as possible.

Logan sighed, his hand rubbing at his forehead as he walked back to the living room.

“Go sit at the table I’ll be right there,” Patton said as he vacuumed the dirt. Logan nodded as he walked back to the dining room.

Roman was sitting on one of the dining chairs, front paws up on the table as he was eyeing the chicken.

“Don’t you dare,” Logan said lowly and Roman fluffled his tail out, plopping his paws down and kneading into the chair cushion as he looked at Logan.

Logan’s eyebrow rose as he looked at the other, until a the glint of eyes under the table had him glancing down.

“Why are you- oh, the vacuum.” Logan watched the curled form of the black cat shake as he sat down, keeping an eye on Roman as he did.

“You’re fairly vigilant huh? You saved me from taking a pot to the head.” Logan said, and the kitten purred.

Logan smirked a little.

“You liked that? Vigilant?”

The kitten hesitantly prowled forward before bumping its head against his leg.

“Vigilant huh? Virgil?” The cat jumped up on the seat right behind Logan.

“Never. Do that again… but… thank you” Virgil purred at Logan’s words the warmth and weight of the side of his body pressed between Logan’s back and the back of the chair.

Logan turned his fork over a few times in his hand, his eyes tracing where Roman was curled on the seat across from him.

Maybe two of the cats can stay.

[cwombw]

isn’t life great?

below cut.

void-Yesterday at 11:25 PM

wtf do you even have to say to me

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:26 PM

I just, if youre this upset with riley for doing then we need to talk about this so you understand

void-Yesterday at 11:27 PM

im ALLOWED to be hurt that he thinks i can NEVER be trusted AGAIN for no apparent reasonif you cant recognize that then WOW

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:27 PM

He doesn't think thatHe blocked people he's know for years

void-Yesterday at 11:27 PM

then WHY the MCFUCK did he block me and why are you saying i should just shut up about it and get over iti cared about him damnit i say him as my own fucking childyoure not who i thought you were lmfao

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:28 PM

He's just really scared right now, youre allowed to be upset but try to underastand

void-Yesterday at 11:28 PM

im done tbh?i blocked him back.its what he wants anyway

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:29 PM

if you feel that's what you want. he's just scared and hiding from everything

void-Yesterday at 11:29 PM

and yet hes still in dandys friendchat.

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:30 PM

He left active chats right off the bat and then got scred people would hate him and stoped

void-Yesterday at 11:30 PM

whatever then.too bad star came home im this close to self harmingim  going to talk to her and hope shecan calm me down from a meltdown

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:31 PM

I just, he's literally dying rn, please try to understandAnd please stay safe

void-Yesterday at 11:31 PM

you also need to understand that others are having similar reactions due to his actions just now

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:33 PM

youre having a heart problem? you were so upset you had a heart attack last night? I'm sorry but I dont think this is comperable

void-Yesterday at 11:33 PM

i meant the goddamn breakdown thing

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:34 PM

I'm sorry i misunderstoodHe jsut doesnt want anyone to see him die

void-Yesterday at 11:39 PM

i f he wants to push everybody away and ruin every good friendship he had and also ruin the dnd kin thing, fine. im not going to open my arms to him anymore.i dont hate him.but the wanting nothing to do eith each other thing is mutual now.

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:40 PM

i hope you understand that i stand with him on this. he just doesnt want to hurt people if he actually dies

void-Yesterday at 11:41 PM

if he actually diesso if he doesnt, what. hes gonna be like "heyyy.. fingerguns sorry that i ruined all my friendships, amde people hate me, and made people panic" i dont play ehadgames like that and i refuse to do that with him.plus, idk. iunno. maybe it should be our choice if we want to stick with him even if hes on his death bed?by doing this its hurting more than watching hiom die

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:43 PM

He's in the hospital and they said things arent looking good. he's terrifiyed and I think you should remember hes only 16. he's just scared as any dying kid would be

void-Yesterday at 11:44 PM

.. so wait. let me get this straight . he decided to. block. every single one of his online friends, out of fear of hurting them. but he didnt try to distance himself from his irl ones, even though it should be thje same fear that drove him to block everybody online in the first place.iwhatnothis boils down to paranoia and distrustwhy exactly, does he  let his irl friends care for him but wont let his online ones do the same

ArchaicArcade-Yesterday at 11:45 PM

It;s easier to block people you don't know in personI just, I cant do this. hes a scared kin and that's all there is to it

void-Yesterday at 11:46 PM

okim dropping itfeel free to block mefigure you want nothing to do with me anymore eitherJune 8, 2018

ArchaicArcade-Today at 12:01 AM

no it's just I need a bit

ArchaicArcade-Today at 8:34 AM

I'm sorry to say this but I've know Riley way longer and well, I choose him over you. I feel terrible but I need to side with my best friend here

void-Today at 11:56 AM

there shouldnt even be a side but okay. i had a feeling y'all weren't telling the truth. because i forgot last night but now i remember that he certainly did not block everybody he was friends with online and the chat in gov kin is evident as such, since people there could still message him.

you all have fun lying now. but i want you both to remember that i would have gone above and beyond for the both of you because i trusted you, cared about you, and loved you.thanks for ripping away a part of my life.

--

s/o-Today at 7:48 AM

Fuck meRiley is the rat talking to lou

s/o-Today at 11:01 AM

Let me know if you are okay.

void-Today at 11:59 AM

.....wow.

s/o-Today at 11:59 AM

He shared our entire dm

s/o-Today at 12:00 PM

God me too

void-Today at 12:01 PM

you know i have a feeling all their friends were in on it and he didnt even have a heart attack last night

--

s/o- you know I never had a grudge against you, and I wasn't in a good place either when you were in my life. please leave me out of your mouth and i'll continue leaving you out of mine. Don't dis GAK either, it's a quiet kin family. -Lex's "live in" partner.

s/o- also I'm carful about the ages of the people I talk too, and that "flirting with a minor thing" not sure who that was at all? I'm sure it had something to do with the nonsense in KK. Anyway last message I will send unless you choose to respond. Yesterday at 4:53 AM

agenderdad420/mysterypeaches the minor was jeremie diioscuri and the offending behavior was via discord in a mutuals server that he had created Yesterday at 2:26 PM s/o- Now i know what you are talking about. I was mislead about his age. But I also never flirted with him. I sent him an NSFW meme once and his little friends started making wild accusations of me. And I do feel bad for offending him, but I didn't know he was a minor.

s/o- That is also how I personally got kicked from KK. I kicked Alex from KK the previous night because it was behaving destructively Today at 7:44 AM

agenderdad420/mysterypeaches thats not an accusation thats straight up telling the truth

s/o- Talking about trans stuff? I was literally complaing about tucking. I also really feel stabbed in the back right now. You think you know someone

agenderdad420/mysterypeaches you... knew who? look idk what you deem appropriate to talk to minors about but maybe it differs for us

s/o- i don't think a trans vent between two trans people is inappropriate if he was squicked by that he could've told me lol. not go sharing a private convo with you. (and i'm not blaming you for that)

agenderdad420/mystery peaches i will say that there is often an inherent power dynamic between older and younger members that maybe made him more uncomfortable

s/o- you know i can take the blame if I fucked up. I hope you know that I've changed a ton since KK. and since I your drama with Lex started. All I want is to be a good person and contribute something to my fellow kinnies.\

agenderdad420/mysterypeaches honestly i havent really kept up w either you or alex since that point, but i dont doubt you can take accountability for your actions.

agenderdad420/mysterypeaches i just hope that there is change that goes along w acknowledgement and perhaps there has been

s/o- I don't speak for lex. But i just want peace Today at 9:21 AM

agenderdad420 fair

--

s/o - Today at 7:49 AM Apparently riley is the one talking to the person who made my callout Do you have a problem with me arcade? 

ArchaicArcade - Today at 8:07 AM no 

s/o - Today at 8:16 AM I guess i squicked him with something i said 

ArchaicArcade - Today at 8:17 AM i guess 

s/o - Today at 8:19 AM My brain: hes sick because of you 

s/o - Today at 12:02 PM I know you have your reasons  for what you guys are doing. But I hope Riley knows how deep he cut me. I would've given you both the moon.

--

not only have these people caused me to have a severe anxiety attack, they caused my partner the same, as well as many others who weren’t even a part of this.

they have caused me to feel suicidal and paranoid, to want to self harm

as for agenderdad420/mysterypeaches, they have sent me anon hate before, accused me of being racist for my neopronouns (all while saying they’re not against neopronouns, lol), and blew up at me for dropping them after they told me they didn’t like that i was trying to set boundaries for my borderline behaviors with them, and that i was confiding in them everything that was going on with me at the time (which was heavily toxic and depressing towards me) they have used language against me that is ableist and abuse apologetic in nature and their claims otherwise are blatant lies.

i had previously published the majority of the anon hate before deleting it from my blog after a while due to discomfort of having drama on my blog.

they have taken to stalking me to find out more past drama about me, as well as taking false anecdotes from others who claim my s/o has been inappropriate with minors to the point of grooming them, which is 1000000000000000% untrue and taken greatly out of context and skewed into something that never happened.

talking about trans issues isn’t grooming, sending a nsfw meme to a person who my s/o believed to be an adult isn’t grooming.

these people are pure evil and have been planning this for a long time from what i’ve gathered.

they are dangerous and unpleasant and will apparently stop at nothing to obtain their goal, whatever it actually is. as evident as one of them faked a heart attack and may have faked an entire condition.

update 7/17/2018

after speaking to rileys sister who he abused for a good part of their life, as well as ruined it and made their mom send them to live with their aunt, i’ve since learned that this is serial abusive behavior and he has also physically beat his younger siblings, is a pathological liar, and everything i’ve thus learned about him 100% fits his m/o.

he can try all he wants to pretend that he got better and has improved but all i see if that he got better methods.

faking a heart attack in order to call my gf a pedophile for talking about trans issues is fucking despicable.

another thing i’ve discovered is that he did in fact assault the person who he says assaulted him 

and the fact he freaked out over a poorly written callout like that, no offense to the victim is kinda funny and really telling. if he was innocent then why bother mentioning anything? i dont think that many people saw it.

i’ve also learned that archaicarcade, aka julien/julian (and plenty of other past names) also has a past of fucking people over very quickly into friendships and relationships and changing their name and other information in order to hide their past.

in fact.. riley hangs out with a lot of weird people, including somebody who was brainwashed by their older brother to be transphobic, and julien, whos relationship with the minors he surrounds himself with is suspect at best.

he also keeps company with a jehovah’s witness, which i shouldn’t have to explain how problematic that is.

my current thoughts about this is that riley while not innocent at all may be being groomed by julien is who also grooming others with help from his other adult buddies they all hang with. i have no sympathy for riley though after what occurred, whatsoever.

just 10-20 minutes ago somebody on a sockpuppet from wilson, north carolina sent me hate after checking out this callout post for riley, this is the screenshot i took

i’ve since blocked and reported the sockpuppet, even if this doesnt belong to riley, its clearly from one of his brainwashed supporters. amazing that a month later they still want to start shit. but this? this is pathetic.

look riley and co. i, my gf, my bf, my other bf, and all my friends know the truth. you’re fucking liars and fakes and abusive and groom people. do the universe a favor and go to long term therapy or maybe just never go online ever again with any device, anytime, anywhere, ever. and in fact hole yoruself up in your homes and never speak to anybody ever again because you clearly can’t help yourselves from finding new targets to fuck with.

emotional terrorism at its finest.

[justanotherboyinblue]

65 Questions You Aren’t Used To

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?        nope!

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?       maybe like a 0.3

3. The person you would never want to meet?       any person in any form of the government ever they’re Scary

4. What is your favorite word?      love, for more than just sappy reasons i promise akgjb

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?       cherry

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?      the only time i look in the mirror is when i wash my hands so i don’t really Look In The Mirror. i thought i looked nice, by that my hair was greasy lmao

7. What shirt are you wearing?      dark gray cub cadet

8. What do you label yourself as?     C on f u s ed

9. Bright room or dark room?       dim room

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?       uhhhhhh i had just finished watching. something with mother 

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?         i haven’t really had one? each year has been better than the last

12. Who told you they loved you last?        Alexis, because No❤️️ my mother doesnt count

13. Your worst enemy?        boredom

14. What is your current desktop picture?        a screenshot of my friend Ryver standing on top of a minecraft build with a sign that says massive shmeat because Obviously

15. Do you like someone?       i do! two someones actually but the second most likely won’t go anywhere

16. The last song you listened to?        currently listening to golden by parade of lights

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?         oh i think you know where this is gonna go :D

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?        pick literally anyone in my family

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?          .....there are. probably minors following me so im not gonna answer that

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)        i feel like it’s a cliche to say my eyes, but i really love my hair too

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?          Oh My God I Would Kill Someone To Be Cis. look in the mirror and Cry

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?        not that im aware of

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?          i feel like spiders and the existential dread of global doom isnt unique so,,

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.         alright lemme put you on smn right now, rally’s mother cruncher sandwich, but with a Fresh and not soggy brioche bun, actual campfire sauce, a slice of melted havarti, and you’re in heaven

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?         I Will Put It In Savings And Not Touch It Ever because spending money makes me very anxious and also cry :)

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?       askjbdga like it’s hard, nevada obvi

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?       something mixed and fruity, maybe svedka? the strawberry lemonade because that sounds like it slaps 

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?         if you’re a republican you’re getting fed to the sharks

29. What is your favorite expletive?         i feel like fuck is just so Versatile, but bitch is a close second

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?         a usb with every file i’ve ever saved, including all of my pictures going back four years

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?         oh boy there’s a lot of options here. either a thought i had once that i will Not disclose, or a piece of information i have about father

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!           sounds like me tbh. either norway or switzerland 

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?         Cat Cat Cat Cat Cat- :DDDDDD my cat Trinity that passed two years ago

34. What was your last dream about?       couldn’t tell ya. i meant to write it down but i did Not

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?        the first thing that popped in my head was listener, and yes!

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?        luckily no

37. Have you ever built a snowman?       many!

38. What is the color of your socks?        white and gray

39. What type of music do you like?         oh anything and everything! upbeat with guitar and im sold

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?        sunsets

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?         m i n t

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)        ew

43. Do you have any scars?        yep!

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?        either bookstore owner or interior designer, im not sure yet. maybe work in a kitchen?

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?         i want to be Cis goddammit

46. Are you reliable?        absolutely! if i care for you

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?         do we ever find a family that stays?

48. Do you hold grudges?        oh Absolutely. if you fuck up big enough im never letting that shit go

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?       is it too much to ask for a pegasus

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?          the intricacies of public school boys and their obsession with cold war russia and any world war

51. Are you a good liar?         100%

52. How long could you go without talking?        does out loud to myself count? because i do that a lot. if im depressed or just. tired then a good few days

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?        chin length bob. why did i think that was a good idea. 12 year old me is Quaking 

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?       not cake, but ive done cupcakes

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?       not Well 

56. What do you like on your toast?          butter and cinnamon sugar, or a good cherry jam

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?          gears for inktober day 3 babeyyy

58. What would be you dream car?        any ford f150 or a solid 67 chevy impala

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.        not in a While. i don’t think so???

60. Do you believe in aliens?       i Do

61. Do you often read your horoscope?         never in my life

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?        very fond of m

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?       is this even a Question. dragons obviously

64. What do you think about babies?       disgusting vomit spewing lizards, and thats an insult to lizards

[sending-the-message]

A New meaning to Drink Myself to Death by JamesonKeystrokes

“You got time for a story, friend?”

Why not? I was already drinking alone at noon on Halloween. Feeling sorry for myself, again. I looked over at the man, it was dark in the bar and the hoodie pulled over his head made it impossible to see his face. For I knew he was a regular. I was the stranger here. Not him. I’m getting ahead of myself though.

Three hours earlier I had woken up to my phone ringing.

“You’re on your way… right?” My best friend Matt spoke from the other line of the phone. Not even bothering with the pleasantries.

“Yeah, yeah man, I’m making great time.” I responded, trying to sound like he didn’t just wake me up, causing my unforgiving hangover to kick into hyper drive.

“Nick, you asshole. You’re still sleeping! Come on, dude!” When you knew someone for 20 of the 25 years you were alive, it was hard to lie to them.

I sat up and grabbed the bottle of water on my nightstand, cracking it open and chugging almost the entire thing- drunk me must have been looking out- with a audible exhale. I stood up, giving myself a second for my equilibrium to gain some stability. Matt was waiting for me to respond, patiently.

“I’m up and will be out the door in no time at all.” I responded, walking into the small bathroom in my small apartment right smack in the middle of nowhere northern Maine.

“I already told everyone you’re coming, so you can not bail now, I don’t care how busy you are at work.”

“No, man. I’ll be there I’m actually looking forward to it. It’ll be nice to see everyone. Not looking forward to the drive though.” I had a seven-hour drive ahead of me to make it back to Connecticut.

“It’ll all be worth it, this party is going to be insane. Trust me.”

“See you soon.” Matt hung up and I jumped in the shower, letting the cold water wake me up.

Over a half year ago, my company relocated me to oversee the opening of a new location. It was supposed to be for six months, but there I was eight months and counting later. Stuck in a boring town, in a small apartment, in the middle of the woods with nothing around me but forest. There was a small center of town that consisted of a grocery store, a bar, and a movie theater that closed years ago.

Sadly, the bar was the only other place I had gone when I wasn’t sulking at home. I had made some “friends” at work but none of them invited their boss to hangout if it wasn’t a work event, especially when more ninety percent of them were older than me. Nope, to them I was just some kid who was cool enough to talk to in the office but nothing more than that.

I quickly packed a bag, loaded up my car and started the trek back home. My phone was flooding with texts of friends that were actually excited to see me. I smiled and responded, I was starting to get pumped up now that I was en route… until I hit the dead stop traffic. Not even half way home and I was sitting bumper to bumper. Slowly crawling a mile in just over an hour I decided to get off the next exit and grab some lunch and maybe a beer to kill some time. Hopefully the traffic would let up.

I drove through what looked like a ghost town for twenty minutes until I saw the small shack stuck in the corner of a dirt road. The small red building looked like an old barn that was remodeled into a bar. “The Canteen” had a few cars in the parking lot… and I use that term lightly seeing as it was just a dirt road.

Hey man, dead stop traffic, running behind. Don’t get too wasted before I make it home.

I sent Matt text, he replied that he wouldn’t as I was walking into the bar. It was fairly normal on the inside. A few booths, a pool table in back, a jukebox on the wall that was playing some twangy blues guitar solo from whatever song the patrons had put on and a bar shoved in the center of the barn. There was a bartender standing oddly stiff behind it, already staring at me as soon as I walked in with a wide smile on his old weathered face.

Besides the two of us there was one man sitting at the bar, a few girls in a booth in back and a man playing pool by himself in back. I took a seat at the bar right across from where the tender was standing. He looked over at me, moving just his neck and not his whole body. I quickly decided to just order a beer and leave. I was feeling very uncomfortable.

“What’ll it be?” He asked.

“Just a bottle of beer, whatever’s cold. I’m not picky.”

He shook his head and turned to the fridge in back almost mechanically. He slapped a bottle of Budweiser in front of me and said “on the house.” I looked at him quizzically. This place had to be hurting for money, I didn’t think they could even afford to give away a free beer.

“You sure?”

He just nodded his head and turned around talking to the other man at the bar. They both looked over at me. Like a wolf the man looked over at me and stood up quickly. I stood my ground and didn't book it for the front door... like I had wanted to. The second a wolf could smell fear, you were already dead. He sat down next to me.

“You got time for a story, friend?”

"I really should be going soon." I responded taking my last sip of beer. The man held up two fingers and two shot glasses were filled with whiskey and slid in front of us.

"This one's on me. Now you have to listen, you don't want to be rude." I looked at the alcohol in front of me. He picked up his shot glass and held it in front of me, waiting for me to cheers with him. "Take the shot, friend."

Fuck it. One shot wasn't going to kill me. Plus the man was a little smaller and looked frail. If he wanted to attack me I was almost positive that I could take him. I was no stranger to a fight. Although I hadn't been in a good scrap in years. I cheers him and took the shot. It burned going down.

"You're in the game now, friend." He held up two more fingers and two more shots were slid in front of us.

"No thanks, I have a long drive and really need to take off." I started to stand up and he put his hand on my arm.

I looked down and grimaced. The skin was rotted and decaying, like the man had been dead for years but someone forgot to tell him. I shot out of the chair, pushing his hand from my arm. He took off his hood and his face matched. The skin was rotted and I could actually see his jaw bone on one side. He laughed.

"That... thats one hell of a Halloween costume." I stuttered.

"That won't do you any good here." He gestured to the beer bottled I was clutching in my hand. I hadn't even realized that I grabbed it. "Sit down. Let me tell you my story."

"Fuck this." I turned around to sprint to my car, I hadn't noticed that the bar had been filled behind me. I scanned the room, they all stood, staring at me. Like my new friend, they too were all rotting.

I sat back down, I had absolutely no idea what to do or how to handle this. Defeated, I sat down, took my second shot and waited to hear what the man had to say. He laughed a laugh that sounded like he had smoked a carton of cigarettes a day since he was 12. He sat back down and took his shot. Two more were lined up, I was starting to sense a pattern.

"Name's Jon, Jon Krester. As you can probably see... I am dead, well, maybe dead isn't the word, but I have been here for a long, long time." He held up his glass.

I, seeing as there was a great chance I was about to be murdered, raised mine as well and drank. If I was going to die, may as well be drunk. Wasn't everyday you get drink with a dead man.

"I'm losing my fucking mind, huh? Is this a joke?" I said, this time holding up my fingers ordering two more. Jon drummed on the bar and laughed again.

"I like you! Out of all the others..." he signaled to all the dead men behind me, "you may actually be my favorite."

We took the shots. I had some sort of tolerance but I was hungover and had an empty stomach. I was feeling it.

"See, here's the deal kid. A long time ago, back when I was fully alive, I used to own this here establishment. I didn't much care for the money, I was a collector of stories and trinkets. That was my vice. If a man came through and wanted to drink but had no coin that was alright by me. As long as he had something to offer, weather it be something interesting or even a intriguing story." Another round of shots.

"I don't have much to offer in that department, Jon but I do have money." I said.

"No, no, no, it's far to late for that. At least for me. See one Halloween night, the bar was particularly dead... no pun intended. A man strolled in, a man I had seen before many times, he always brought me in something cool. He leaned over the bar he said to me, 'Jon, what if I told you that you could live on in this bar forever, collecting tales and trinkets until the end of time?' Naturally I needed whatever it was he was offering... I was a stupid man back then." Another round of shots. I was tipsy and on the fine line of being drunk.

"This is unbelievable." I pulled the phone out of my pocket. You guessed it, no service. Jon grabbed the phone and put it on the bar top.

"He reached in his bag and in his hand he held up a golden bottle. In this bottle was a never ending supply of whiskey... a special whiskey. When I drink it, I gain the life of the person drinking with me." He nodded at me, I looked at the shot glass. "Way too late to turn back now. The only way you get to walk out of this bar, friend, is by outdrinking me." He slammed back the shot.

"You've got to be shitting me. Come on, how do I outdrink a dead man? No offense but it seems like you have sort of an unfair advantage." I took my shot, if I was already in the game, I guess I would try and win.

"Have you not been listening? I am not dead. I am immortal... well so far at least." Another shot.

"So, all I have to do is outdrink you, a man who has built up a 200 year tolerance to booze? Welp, good thing I've been in a depressive slump these past 8 months." I laughed and took the shot and ordered another taking it down too.

"That's the spirit! What's your name? We have a long night ahead of us."

"Nick." I took another shot, the more drunk I became, the less fearful I was. Liquid courage.

As the night went on and the shots kept on flowing, Jon continued to tell me about all the men he had bested over the years. I knew I should be terrified I knew I should be begging for my life. However, the more I drank of the whiskey, the less I seemed to care about anything at all. We traded stories about drunken benders and debauchery.

The more I talked to Jon, the more I forgot that he was trying to steal my life and would almost more than likely be the cause of my death. My only saving grace was that I was literally drinking for my life. Somewhere between arm wrestling and that game.... where you stab between each others fingers.... you know what I'm taking about, I had enough. I hopped over the bar, grabbed the bottle of whiskey and started chugging it.

"No! You fucking idiot!" Jon yelled. He jumped over the bar and hit me harder than I had ever been hit in my entire life. Even with a half gallon of whiskey in my system it hurt. I fell to the ground and wiped the blood from my nose. I was slow to recover. "Why did you have to go and do that? I was actually enjoying this." he growled and kicked me in the stomach.

I tried to stand up but a boot came down colliding with my face. I was out cold. I had no idea how long I was asleep for but I awoke to the sound of my phone ringing next to me. I opened my eyes, I was lying on my side, a line of puke in front of me. I stood up rubbing my head. My nose was swollen and there was a cut under my right eye.

The bar was... actually not a bar at all anymore. It was just a big empty barn. My head was spinning and I hunched over and threw up again. Putting the phone to my ear Matt was on the other line.

"How's the traffic, you almost here?"

"What... what fucking time is it?" I asked, more confused than I had ever been in my entire life.

"Are you drunk? You can't be serious... you texted me a fucking hour ago about pulling off for food." He yelled.

"No, I'm... I'm not, I'm on my way I was just zoning out. I'll call you back."

I sprinted out of the barn. The dirt road was just a vacant as it was when I had walked in. My car was the only car in the middle of the road. I got in and turned it on, taking a deep breath. Having no doubt in my mind that what just happened was real. I looked on my passengers seat, there was a bar tab receipt.

"Ya got balls, kid. In the years I have been doing this no one has ever went for the bottle. You win this round but I promise you this... I will see you again. Until next time. Jon."

I looked in my rear view mirror and he was staring right back at me. When I turned around, he was gone. I skidded away from the barn leaving dirt and dust behind. It was going to be one hell of a Halloween night.

[bluetigress2015]

Moving On...

It’s 2017. Im turning 31 in a few weeks. I am not where I thought I would be, honestly.  When I was about 23, friends were talking about where they were going to be in ten years. There were things like, “married with kids” and “my career really taking off” being said. Me? I could not honestly see myself living past the age of 25.  I was heavily ingulfed by my depression. There were times I had tried to down a bottle of sleeping pills. No, I did not want to kill myself. I just didnt want to wake up the next morning to deal with my inner demons all over again. No one knew how hard it was to simply get out of bed in the mornings. Often I shut people out and would sleep and go to work, and repeat. I lived in an area that was so rural and remote it was 20 miles to the next gas station, and another 20 from there to town where the population was about 50 thousand, one grocery store, one movie theater screen, and not much else to do. It was two hours to drive to the big city. And eventually seclussion and depression cost me friends and it put me deeper in my hole. So, I didn’t see myself living past 25. 

Fast foreward a bit where I found a job that paid well. I was eventually able to move out on my own, as I had been living in my mom’s home when I’d lost a job due to it was not adding up to pay more in gas than what I was making in earnings. I met a man who was amazing. Things were going well. But then there were so many things that went wrong and I let my fear of being alone over take me, and I just let him use me so much, and I changed myself a lot for him, just so I would not loose him from my life. We were off and on with our relationship for seven years. While there were a lot of bad times, there were some amazing times, too. Like, first kisses, mutual geeking out over new movies and comics and music. Romantic over night trips into Los Angeles, and the beach trips, and walking the strip in Vegas together. I even moved to Vegas to be close to him when he had moved. I loved him full hearted and with all my soul. We had a real connection spiritually. To the point where I could feel within myself when something was not right with him even If we were not seeing each other that day and we were on opposite sides of town. Like when he went to the hospital, i felt it in my stomach something was wrong and my mind kept going back to him and the red flags were up. I knew he was hurt before he told me. I believe he loved me. But after seven years, I know now he did not know how to properly love with open honesty.  He used Polyamory as a way to cheat and lie and hide me from others. I could go on about him and what went wrong, but I think thats enough for now.  So, I left him in June, 2017. Its July now, almost August. It’s still fresh. And still hurts as if it just happend today. So what do you do? You move on. Sure, I was down for a couple days after it happened. But I had to pull myself up, put my big girl panties on and get back to life. Bills needed paid and I just got myself my first new car, it was not cheap. I hold pain and almost a level of anger when he comes to mind, but I turn it into fuel to get myself out of bed each day and keep moving. If i stop, my inner demons will see an open door and will push and shove each other to try and get through first. They have been sitting in a box in the corner of my mind for so long, scratching and screaming, pushing and hitting the sides of the box trying to tear their way out. When I wake each day, they stay put and the box stands unbroken. I know this. But then there are times when my dreams haunt me. Dreams that he has returned, and he holds so much anger and hatred towards me for leaving him, and he’s kidnapped me and is speeding down the interstate in the rain telling me he wont let me go alive...  There is never peace in my head too long. But I have to move on. Yes. There is still love for the good times in my heart, for the memories, for the man I thought he was finally turning into in the last year we were together. But All i have to do is remember I am not the only person he has used, nor am I the last...  So, I go out. I get involved with my local BDSM community. I make friends. He had been my 2nd Dom, first DaddyDom. And we had a year with that dynamic and it was great for us. Now I have a part of me I had discovered with him but now I miss, and need fed. I am a middle-little. I am a submissive. I need to serve. I need to be wanted. I need to be played with. To have my body used but on my terms. I need a protector, a lover, a partner, a mate. I coudl not have all of that in him. But maybe by getting out and meeting new people, just maybe I will find my new Daddy who can give me purpose, give me an outlet to serve. Who will help me forget about .. him..  I move on.. 

I wake up, becuase I know my future Daddy would want me to wake each day.  I shower, make the bed, because I know my future Daddy would be proud to see me doing small chores/tasks before the day has even started.  I do the laundry, I get ready for the day, sometimes I make my own lunch to take to work, because I know my future Daddy would want me to make healthier choices for my body.  I go to work, i do my best.  I come home, make dinner, play with my puppy, I work on school or my online shop, because I know it will make my future Daddy proud.  I do what I can for my home and my self, because I want a Daddy who will see what I do now, and sees potential in what He thinks I can be, who wants to help shape me in to a better person. I want to make my future Daddy, whomever he may be, proud to call me HIS. <3

I can not dwell on the pain of the past, on things that did not last. But I can work on me, here and now, and prepare for my future. 

[skiasurveys]

sex sex sex sex.

1. What’s your favorite position and why? i like doggy style a lot because i dont know it just feels really great and its pretty dominating..but i also like missionary but its boring but i like it when i want to feel “romantic”. lmao.

2. How did you lose your virginity? If you’re still a virgin, is there any specific reason?  I lost my virginity at 19. Basically I was preparing to bang my boyfriend ( my current one!) but I was super nervous ( I already had some trauma from the past). I was scared and stuff and so we tried and I was like Idk man im scared. Then later that night we just started to kiss and make out and he asked if I wanted to try again and I said sure so I got naked blah blah, I was sitting on him kissing hm and then bam he fucked me but it felt really awesome and nice, didn’t hurt because he was slow at it and then he fucked me from behind after i got used to it lol. Great times. That was like a year ago!

3. If you could have sex with any porn star or model, who would it be?  i dont know any porn stars and im not attracted to any models either.

4. What’s one thing in particular that makes you want to tear off your lover’s clothes? Sometimes if he looks at me a certain way or if were doing something . Or if he starts touching my thighs and/or kissing my neck 

5. Five turn ons. 1. Strong looking/masculine 2.Taller than me but no taller than 6′3 3. kissing my neck. 4. man handeling me (without being too aggressive).5. showing me off ( Not like “OH LOOK WHAT I HAVE” but being proud you have me. 6. Five turn offs. 1. Being an asshole. 2.Acting like you don’t care about me when youre around others. 3.Racist/sexist/etc 4.Creepy. 5.Hating my friends

7. Have you had any embarrassing sexual experiences?   its so embarrassing.. so I had just finished my period ( OR so i thought) and we started to fuck and it was going well.. after we finished he was like “Um i think you still have your period.” and Im like “what?” and yeah there was blood on his dick and I legit ran and cried in the bathroom like a little bitch LOL. He came after me and said it was fine and that hes done more awkward shit but DUDE...

8. Do you have a fetish? not really. I like calling my boyfriend daddy in the bedroom but i dont like the ddlg fetish at all. 

9. Have you experimented with anyone of the same sex?  no 10. What’s “out of bounds” for you during sex?  Choking, or tying me up, or like bondage stuff. I just have a severe panic attack if that happens and I dont like it and I had trauma so its actually triggering.

11. What’s the best sexual unsolicited advice you can give?  Just dont fuck them if youre not ready. 

12. Hickies - get ‘em or give ‘em? both

13. Do you like giving head? im that weird girl who actually enjoys sucking cock

14. Do you like getting head? yes 

15. What’s one thing you look for in a partner?  loyalty and companionship. 

16. How many partners have you had?  1 and im still with him :)

17. What’s your sexual orientation? Straight

18. If you’re bi/pansexual, what gender do you tend to prefer? n/a

19. Describe the best sex you’ve ever had.  Theres a few. It usually is when he goes hardcore with teasing me and kissing me. One time he was kissing me and teasing me. He ate me out for a bit which was amazing, and the he kissed me from my tummy to my lips, and he fucked me hard but slow and said I love you which was awesome. But i also had one where He was teasing me and doing lots of foreplay and he told me he owned me and that he wanted all of me and then he fucked me so good. especially when he cums inside me. MMMMM.

20. Describe the worst sex you’ve ever had. It wasnt bad but I just have depression and sometimes it hits me when were fucking and  i lost my sex drive and just didnt care and it didnt last that long but i lied i orgasmed so he could finish because i wasnt feeling it lol

21. Have you ever had a funny sexual experience? What was it? i dont know. Im sure. 22. Are you okay with rough sex?  Yess just not too rough ok!

23. How big was the biggest dick you’ve ever seen? Was it in a porn or in real life? well i mean guys in porn always have huge dicks but my boyfriend is the only one Ive had and he is pretty big.

24. Boobs or ass - which is better? ass. 25. Do you prefer sex or masturbation? sex i hate masturbating.

26. Describe how you usually masturbate. ill leave that for your imagination. 

27. Do you like tattoos on a partner or do you like them to have a clean slate, skin wise?  i dont care. either or.

28. How do you feel about daddy dom/little girl roleplaying? some people go a little too far with it. Like for example actually acting like they are 4 years old in public. You can leave it to the bedroom, please.

29. What’s your fantasy?  pay off my student loans.

30. Do you have any sexual regrets? no

31. When did you last have sex? april 1st before Connor moved! He will be back in the end of May or start of June so it will be a while before we have sex again :(

32. When did you last masturbate? last night

33. Have you had anal? yeah. Its ‘ight. 

34. Do you like to spank/be spanked?  i like to be spanked.

35. What do you want done to you right now?  well since  I havent seen my boyfriend in like a month i would love it for him to just push me against a wall. mmm.

36. Are you comfortable with getting tied up? no

37. Did you have sex in high school? nope. No one really liked me back then. I had like 2 boyfriends then and it was shitty then. I met Connor the fall after i graduated. Hilarious.

38. How old were you when you lost your virginity? How long has it been? 19 years old and its been a year now.

39. Do you like teasing or would you rather get straight to the point? teasing.

40. Sexting or phone sex?  ive done both. sexting is fun but phone sex can be pretty hot. I just dont like phone sex..i rather sext tbh

41. Have you had sex in any interesting places? One time we were hanging at our friends place and everyone had gone to bed and Connor was cuddling me on their couch and he said , “ I bet its just bothering you that you cant touch me” and im like whatever idc and then hes like “lets lowkey fuck” so we fucked on their couch while they were sleeping! It was pretty fun but nervous cus if someone walked out. oh god..and then we fucked behind a couch like 3 times while there was a party going on. cool.

42. Are you sexually active?  i guess so. since he moved its hard to say but its only for short time.

43. Have you had car sex? no our car is too small for that. but i want to.

44. Have you ever had sex with anyone else in the location you were at? (i.e., while your sister was in the other room) yes..see above

45. Why aren’t you fucking anyone right now? well the only person i would fuck is in a nother city obvs so thats why.

46. Are you able to have emotionless sex? not rly

47. Does penis size really matter? yes

48. What has been your most memorable experience sexually? theres a lot

49. If male, are you well endowed? n/a

50. If female, what’s your breast size?  34 B cup.

51. Have you ever been the other person? no

52. Have you ever cheated on anyone?  no!

53. Describe an orgasm.  i just felt really weird and shakey but it felt so good.

54. What’s the longest time you’ve had sex for? I dont really keep count.

55. What’s the shortest time you’ve had sex for?  like 5 minutes. -___-

56. If you could change the person you lost your virginity to, would you?  no

57. Have you had any pregnancy scares? Yeah kinda. my one period didnt come once and i was so scared. I bought like 3  sticks.

58. Are you comfortable naked?  kinda. Ive been with Connor for a year now and I still feel awkward naked. lol

59. Are you comfortable sending pictures of yourself to others? depends.

60. What’s your sexual comfort zone like?just dont do rape play.

61. What’s something sexual that you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up liking?  i cant think of anything

62. Do you have any piercings in fun places? (i.e., clit, nipples, dick) no

63. Would you say you’re good in bed?  i think so.

64. How do you get sex tips? internet or i ask him how he wants me to do something. like i ask him if he likes what im doing and he will tell me how he wants it.

65. Have you ever had sex with anyone while they were on their period? Have you ever had sex while on your period?  no except that one time when i thought i was fkn done but i wasnt. kill myself.

66. If you could be the other sex for a day, would you and what would you do first? idk.

67. What’s your favorite part about being the gender you are? I dont know really. I can buy cute drinks without looking dumb?

68. Slow but passionate, or fast, furious, and kinky? slow but passionate. But also depends on the mood or whatever because sometimes i want rough, sometimes i don’t.

69. Have you ever 69’d? Did you enjoy it?  yes but it feels too good to suck him while hes eating me out.

70. Have you ever done drugs and then had sex?  weed

71. Have you ever had sex with someone you’re in love with? yes

72. How are you with BDSM? Would you ever engage in it?  nope.

73. Do you like gagging on cock/having someone gag on your cock? Why?  i love gagging on his cock.

74. When it comes to oral, are you gentle? Do you use your hands too? gentle. i dont want to hurt him but if i do go hard kinda. and yeah i used my hands.

75. Okay, how do you feel about handjobs?  sometimes i do hand jobs but its only when im making him hard. Lol.

76. Have you had any unwanted pain during sex? yeah.

77. What is something that’s not sexual that can turn you on more than anything sexual?  arms? 78. Can your sexual partners be categorized by their zodiac signs? no

79. Have you had sex to music? What’s your favorite sex song? we fucked to Wish you were here by Pink Floyd.

80. What’s something you want to try in bed?  i dont know.

81. Has anyone drew blood from you during sex, whether it was by cutting, biting, or scratching? How did you feel about that? no. if there was blood from biting/scratching/etc i would feel awful.

82. Have you ever fucked someone who was sad? Did it help them emotionally or make it worse? I have fucked him when he was sad and it helped and same for me sometimes it makes me feel way better.

83. Do you like sexual anons? no

84. What’s your ideal round of sex?  i dont know.

85. Do you like the use of whipped cream, handcuffs, chocolate, and cherries?  nope.

86. Have you ever been walked in on or caught?  almost got caught.

87. Have you ever had sex in public? Would you? yes and i would.

88. What’s a good sex joke?  i dont know. 89. Do you like to be called a dirty slut or would you rather be treated like royalty?  i love it when he calls me a slut but theres a time and place during sex when i want to be slutty and then loved LMAO.

90. Are you more submissive or dominant? sub 91. What’s your naughtiest secret? i almost fucked a 33 year old when i was 18.

92. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve encountered sexually?  i cant think of anyting

93. Have you ever “stuck your dick in crazy”? Was there a lesson learned?

94. Do you like playing with balls/having someone play with yours? i like playing with them because he loves it. 

95. What’s the best nonsexual feeling?  feeling safe and loved by them.

96. Do you like feet? ew 97. Do you look at rule 34/hentai? ew....

98. Pick a random question off this survey for yourself. N/A 99. Who’s your ideal sexual partner? MY BOYFRIEND.

100. Do you have a partner right now? Would you like one? have my boyfriend :) 101. Are you accepting “applications” for a partner?  um no

[dong-hyucks]

92 Truths

I was tagged by @btsgroupchat​ ^^

I apologize for not posting your requests several times in a row, but I thought that I would just do this now~

Rules: you gotta answers questions and then tag 20 others (i don’t talk to like anyone riP--)

THE LAST… 1.Drink: Water

2.Phone call: Grandma

3.Text message: ‘My house smells like smoke. My mom may or may not have set the grill on fire.’ to my friend... do i need to explain this one haha

4.Song you listened to: BTOB - Movie

5.Time you cried: Earlier today because I was annoyed and had a headache, which usually makes me cry (im a crybaby lol)

6.Dated someone twice: no lol

7. Been Cheated on: nope ^

8.Kissed someone and regretted it: yes actually ><

9.Lost someone special: two people this year

10.Been depressed: sadly

11.Gotten drunk and thrown up: i mean-- i’m fourteen so, so no i’d hope not

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. Purple [violet / lavender]

13. Black

14. Blue [baby / electric]

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… 15.Made new friends: surprisingly yes 16.Fallen out of love: romantically, no 17.Laughed until you cried: there is actually something wrong with my eyes and they water a lot easier than they should so... like everyday 18.Found out someone was talking about you: yeah >< they were insulting me oops-- (psst i can hear you) 19.Met someone who changed you: absolutely 20.Found out who your true friends are: i hope i do 21.Kissed someone on your Facebook list: no?? thats awkward lol GENERAL… 22.How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all 81 of them 23.Do you have any pets: a dog (she’s an adorable shih-tzu/maltese poodle <3) 24.Do you want to change your name: sometimes, since there are like seven annoying people with the same name at school, but i would just be knocking off the ‘n’ so there isn’t really any point 25.What did you do for your last birthday: went to the movies with my friends then hung out at my house (choked on food like twice oops) 26.What time did you wake up: 6:30 AM like always 27.What were you doing at midnight last night: writing 붙잡았어야 해 lyrics in a notebook while watching sensory couple 28.Name something you cannot wait for : my brother’s grad in a few months... i’m actually proud of him but he doesn’t need to know that lol 29.When was the last time you saw your mother: like fifteen minutes ago 30.What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i can’t name just one thing tbh 31.What are you listening to right now: Monsta X - Beautiful w/ the voice playing in the bg 32.Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yup 33.Something that is getting on your nerves: grades? stress? school? peOPLe? 34.Most visited website: tumblr i have no life 35.Elementary: ‘graduated’ last year 36, High School: in my first year atm 37.College: x 38.Hair color: brown w/ blonde streaks (i regret bleaching it so much) 39.Long or short hair: long 40.Do you have a crush on someone: nope 41.What do you like about yourself: getting into kpop three years ago (thx me) 42.Piercings: two on my ears but I kinda want helix/upper lobe piercings 43.Blood type: i honestly don’t know but it might be A idk 44.Nickname: Jade 45.Relationship status: single, as it always will be ^^; 46.Zodiac sign: : aquarius [feb. 18] 47.Pronouns: : she/her 48.Favorite tv show: i love watching ncis 49.Tattoos: none 50.Right or left hand: Right FIRST… 51.Surgery: i was like two and it was for my teeth but i don’t know what exactly 52.Piercing: just my ears 54.Sport: i do volleyball and snowboarding 55.Vacation: vancouver most likely we go there like once/two times a year 56.Pair of trainers: idk 57.Eating: i just had dinner 58.Drinking: water 59.I’m about to: go read 61.Waiting for: nana [jaemin] to come back healthy and well rested 62.Want: chocolate, pain killers, money to buy albums... 63.Get married: in the far, far future if im lucky 64.Career: i want to be an english professor [says the one who is too lazy to capitalize her words] WHICH IS BETTER… 65.Hugs or kisses: hugs~ they’re warm >< 66.Lips or eyes: eyes 67.Shorter or taller: idc about other’s height 68.Older or younger: i still don’t care as long as it’s legal lol 70.Nice arms or nice stomach: : wha? 71.Sensitive or loud: i can be both, so both 72.Hook up or relationship: Relationship 73.Troublemaker or hesitant: both HAVE YOU EVER… 74.Kissed a stranger?: yes, it was weird 75.Drank hard liquor? : foUrTeEn yEarS oLD 76.Lost glasses contact/lenses? : yup... my glasses and they were on my head 77.Turned someone down?: yes... im sorry >< 78.Sex on first date?: uh no?? 79.Broken someone’s heart?: unfortunately :( 80.Had your heart broken?: yup :( 81.Been arrested?: no 82.Cried when someone died?: yes 83.Fallen for a friend?: no DO YOU BELIEVE IN… 84.Yourself?: eh 85.Miracles?: sure 86.Love at first sight?: attraction** at first sight, no 87.Santa Claus?: yAs it’s finland (says the person who has not watched hetalia) 88.Kiss on the first date?: sure?? 89.Angels?: i guess OTHER…. 90.Current best friend’s name: ares + sam 91.Eye color: dark, dark brown 92. Favourite movie: i loved the conjuring

That’s it~ I tag: (idk if any of these people have done it, so i’m sorry if i tagged you if you already have~ these are just mutuals that i/past admins have followed)

@jungwoosnatchedmyweave​, @mile-ruichi​, @baekhyun-hanburger​, @marksmushroomhair​, @koreanscenes​, @armygirl1707​, @the-tiny-2j​, @yoongiismydrug​, @kpopscenariosreactsshipping​, @shitbtsreactionsandtexts​, @swervingkpoptrashcan​, @kpop-text-messages​, @hinarashimawara​, @whatifwearefiction​, @beaniechiminie, @ham001s, and since i don’t have anymore mutuals imma just tag anyone who wants to do this :) just tell me so i can check your blog out~

i dont talk to any of my mutuals (unless im on anon) >< im sorRY YOU FOLLOWED A SOCIALLY AWKWARD PERSONandwiafwahfihw-- i love all of their blogs but idk how to speak ^

bonus:

93. Ultimate bias: LEE DONGHYUCK / DONGHYUK / HAECHAN / BEAUTIFUL BOY OF NCT

[tempestuous-cosplay]

Flower Asks

Alisons: Sexuality?

Demi-romantic poly-pansexual.

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

They Them non-binary 

Amaryllis: Birthday?

July 20!!!!! Gunna be 25

Anemone: Favorite flower?

Can’t choose. But its something blue, purple, or red. I really like Hydrangeas and Narcissus flowers.  

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

Brooklyn 99, Avatar the Last Airbender, MeatEater

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Depends on whats needed. 

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

ah, man, i don’t fuckin know. Probably the line “Change IS nature, dad, the part we can influence. And it all starts when we decide.” from ratatouille 

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Water, milk, then sprite. Unless we talkin booze, tequilla.

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ABSOLUTELY 

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Yup. Would love to have that again one day, but not now. 

Baneberries: Favorite song?

Under My Skin by Jukebox the Ghost at the moment, but consistantly its Pierre by Rynn Weaver. 

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

Better than some but has its issues. 

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

I have 5 closest friends whom i LOVE and talk to with any regularity. 

Begonia: Favorite color?

PURPLE

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

DRAGON

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

I like being awake in the morning bc then it feels like i have so much time to do stuff, but my sleep schedule always shifts to being a night owl.

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

a Kite or a hawk for all that fancy flying.

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A veterinarian, a puppeteer, or the next david attenborough. 

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

I eventually want ONE, just one, of my own when I’m living with a community who will help me raise them. But really, i think too many people are having children who just should not be parents. 

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

Being in love again bc the last times its happened I got traumatized.

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I always used to say i would never get tattoos and now i have one and plans for more. Ain’t gunna stop till im covered.

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?  

I would travel up to my friend @b-oredzoi and spent the day with her. She ain’t got a choice. 

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Single but with some FWB situations goin on.

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

anywhere outside continental US. Im not picky. Top choices Kyoto Japan, the french countryside, p much anywhere in africa.

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

when im tripping on acid or when my friends are hugging me real tight. 

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?  

YEAH, got one on my thigh. 

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?  

YUP, lobes and one cartilage 

California Poppy: Height?  

5′4 and hating every second of it. Wish i was taller. 

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

100%

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?  

skill boxers stolen from an ex-friend and a shirt that im not 100% sure is mine??? but I’ve had it for a year and wear it all the time soooooooooooo. Mine now

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

I used to sleep with the closet light on until i was, like..... 14? 15?

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?  

myyyyy mom prolly.

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

my pal Eli

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

something swoopy and pretty. Or the one thats just emojis. 

Columbine: Are you tired?

always

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

getting top surgery and corona being over. 

Coneflower: Dream job?

philanthropist actor/ director. 

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

ambivert. 

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

We did this with balsom fir. anyway, yes i have been!!

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

depending on who they are, as far as they needed me to. I don’t THINK i would kill anyone, but there are a few people i would willingly die for. 

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

A green and purple dragon named Puff, who i still have. He’s always either in my bed or on a shelf in my room. 

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Cancer

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

Didn’t die. Helped stop my grans house from burning down. 

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

so far its getting my associates degree. Either that or dragging myself out of a horrible depressive, self destructive spiral in 2018-2019, getting the help i needed, and doing better for myself and those around me.

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?  

figure out why and wither resolve it or dump the partner.

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

my dad prolly. 

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

Crafty stuff. and animal trivia. 

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

organizing anything, remembering dates, statistics. 

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

Got okayed for top surgery

got surprise money!

Got a sentimental piece of art from my grandparents (at long last.)

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

p solid. Helped my dad with some yard stuff, made a yummy dinner, saw most of the supplies i need for a new project shipped. 

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

mmmmmmm not really, but im getting there.

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

Graduate, move out, get a good, fulfilling job. Travel some more. 

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

The friends who stuck around

my plushie collection

my tarot collection

my print collections from cons

finally having a queen sized bed

books

my pets (wow, almost forgot about them)

my fursuit making skills

my hair

my gently rising self esteem 

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?  

petting soft things, reading, watching Ghibli movies. 

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

all them love languages bro. Every single one. I tailor my affection to the individual and what love language they receive most.   Mostly, I cook for people.

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

We’ve done this one too!

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Its a nice balmy 72 degrees with a nice breeze. The sun is shinning with some clouds here and there. I go to the zoo with some friends/ a friend and we just share random facts about our favorite animals. we get some cute plushies at the gift shop and then go to a wonderful meal, either greek or korean bbq or Pho and we go back to someones house to watch movies and vibe, sleepy, warm, and content. 

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

read, craft, organize my room, draw, garden, swim.  

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

I dont have a singular “Best friend”. I do have my Inner circle tho!

Laura- we met my freshman year of collage, first day and we click INSTANTLY. She’s my soulmate and I would go to hell and back for her (RIP to Orphius, but im different)

Bly- we met, like, back in 2014/2015 at house parties but didn’t really start getting SUPER close like we are now until, like, 2017/18/19 ish. Really the only person I actively talk to every single day, my mood twin. We share a braincell. 

Syd- we met at, like, Momocon 2014? 2015?? something like that???? bc we roomed together. We started getting close in 2016 by bonding over fursuit stuff. My go to roadtrip partner. I kinda owe my current joy for life to her bc she helped me through my hell time in 2018 but kicking my ass and teaching me how to make fursuits. 

Eli- we met at Dragon-Con through a mutual friend in 2014, but didn’t really get close until may of 2019. Now we’re p much partners in everything but title bc we just don’t have romantic feelings for eachother. We share a therapist and hang out at least 3 times a month.

Shane: We’ve been friends since, like, 2010 but started getting close in 2017 when they helped me get a job. Then we just,,, stuck around. They kick my ass to get out of the house and do stuff, or did before corona 

Sammi : Friends since 2010 when we were in highschool together. Our friendship was super rocky until we were in different schools and smoothed out as we aged and matured. They are the reason i got into conventions  and cosplay as a whole, so they have only themselves to blame for how I am now. 

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Eli and laura. 

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

my inner circle is, like, 6 people, but friends as a whole like.... idk.... 20?

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

“Your gender vibe, is, like, primordial. Its a perfect blend of masculine, feminin and things that are just indescribable.”

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

I hate myself, to be perfectly honest. But Im trying my best to be a good person and a good friend, so I don’t have to like me, as long as the people who matter do. 

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

I love my hair. Also how much better at communication i’ve gotten. 

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself? 

my adhd and the social symptoms of that.  

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

i liked swinging and listening to the sounds of shoes on carpet. Good stim time.

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

I never really had a best friend for more than 2 years. They would always move away, So i don’t really have a solid “best friend as a kid.” Why yes, I do have abandonment issues. 

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

How my last relationship ended. I pulled some STUUUUUUUPID shit and never got to own up to it or hold the other person accountable for the harm they did to me. It was just overall horrible and never got any type of closure. Likely never will. But it be that way sometimes. 

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?  

My grandfather died last week and i feel........ almost nothing bc I honestly really did not like the man. He was horrible to me growing up and horrible to my mother while my grandmother was sick and dying. But he did a number of good things too. But I feel guilty for not mourning him more. 

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

I chose Sawyer bc when I was younger, I was very good at wriggling my way out of work and my mom and aunts would call me “Tom Sawyer”. I also just like Mark Twain and the name Sawyer in general. Feels good

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

In the suberbs of atlanta in a nice house on the Chattahoochee river. I’m actually still living there while I finish school. 

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

Rosey wall paper and gross maroon carpet until 7th grade, when we painted it all blue and put in blue carpet. It was, and is, very VERY blue. Im gunna be painting 2 walls different colors soon.

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?  

Miserable, tbh. A lot of shit happened when i was 16 that left me with a lot of trauma and issues that I didn’t really have the maturity or energy to deal with while in highschool on top of being queer and dealing with that. So it was a lot of fighting with parents, self loathing, and struggling in school. It had its beautiful wonderful moments that I love with all my heart, but for the most part it was just kinda rough. 

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

Georgia born and raised. She tries her best and is a wonderful mother, but we clashed a lot growing up bc she’s fairly neurotic and likes everything to be precise and orderly and perfect and im... ADHD so sometimes close enough is all you’re going to get. Growing up, i couldn’t communicate what was going on with me or happening in my head very well at all, and it caused a lot of tension. 

Onions: Tell about your dad.  

Hes from Bogota colombia and im almost a carbon copy of him. That means our issues with ADHD have a happen of blowing up at eachother. He’s horrible and constructive communication, but overall is sweet and funny and very very clever. My relationships with both of them are p okay nowadays with a few spats here and there that I will deal with when I don’t live with them anymore. 

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

I never met my paternal grandparents. My maternal grandfather died when I was 6 and i hardly remember him.

My maternal step grandfather was.... not a good man but he was interesting and incredibly smart and fairly liberal. So there was that at least. But, to be honest, I hated the guy.

My maternal grandmother was one of my favorite humans in the world. She spent her whole life a highschool science teacher. She was funny, witty, elegant, a fairly talented cook who always encouraged me in everything I tried. Im still dealing with some emotional stuff regarding her passing, but Im just always so glad i got to spend as much time with her as I did. 

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

haha shit. Maybe my 21? A bunch of friends and i went and hung out at a park then got hammered at my house after. 

Peony: What was your first job?

Working at the summer camp i went to as a kid. Debating going back if I ever can. 

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

I want my future partner to be a friend where things just, grew and blossomed. 

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

Emotional? I try to be constructive and communicative about who or what caused it and doing something productive to help deal with it.

Physical, i just ignore it until it goes away. 

Pink: Where is home?

Wherever Im going to sleep that night. 

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

When my ex broke up with me, I would have cut all ties all together instead of try the whole “we can stay friends” bullshit. I would have just “I don’t hate you, but If we aren’t going to be together, I can’t be friends with you until I’ve had some time to heal.”

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

nope

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

I’ve made my fortune and when I say things people listen, but I can also run away to my beautiful little homestead with my queer friends and wife and all our animals and children living together in a wonder queer commune. I get to travel twice a year and i never have to worry about money. 

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

hmmmm. No idea.

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

can’t pick one person.

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

wind chimes probably.

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

oh man, too many to choose. I’ve lived a wonderful life so far. 

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

Too many to choose. THe night I got dumped, my grandmothers funeral, my friends funeral, some others that I don’t wanna talk about due to triggers. bleah

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?  

I want..... soup dumplings. 

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Depends. really intense or personal feelings involving my depression or emotions is almost impossible to talk about. But my feeligns about films and stuff i have 0 issues talking about. 

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

Laura

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

idk, like 7 hours?

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

School

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

im.... technically self employed/ unemployed. I want a job tho. 

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

My killstar hoodie. 

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.  

Disaster gay.

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

A tarot deck

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

Corona virus. and money. 

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

The entire Heros Of Olymus series The lightning thief and Sea of monsters The trials of Apollo The last unicorn.

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

ideally living with friends and one year away from graduation.

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

*sweats* yea

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

im a witch

[2tsrwzsba-blog]

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[nh0betsm-blog]

Can I get a company car as a Farmers Insurance Co. Agent?

Can I get a company car as a Farmers Insurance Co. Agent?

So im becoming a Farmers Insurance Agent. I d like to know if I can get a company car to commute to and from work and if possible for private use? I currently do not have a car but I am a licensed driver. My office will be 30 miles away, one way only so 60 miles each day. I currently have no money to purchase a new car and I ve no work experience either. I m not sure if Farmers offers company cars but I d believe they do. Any advice? Thanks in advance.

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurance4hquotes.xyz

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[through-war-and-at-peace]

— 1. Who was the last person you held hands with? My Partner 2. Are you outgoing or shy? Little bit of both  3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my cat my partner and my best friend also LP 4. Are you easy to get along with? Yes? 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? Yes  6. What kind of people are you attracted to? pretty much anyone that is a human being 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Yes 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Pretty much always Michio Kaku 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? nahhhh  10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My roomie 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “Yeahhh that’s great!” 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? “Oh shit” Nat Lefkoff “The high” Kelela “bitches broken hearts” Billie eilish “unfucktheworld” Angel Olsen “mama said” cat clyde 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? yes but only if they’re good at it  14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? ehhh not really more like law of attraction serendipity if thats the same thing then sure? 15. What good thing happened this summer? I started therapy  16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Always  17. Do you think there is life on other planets? mhmmm ohhh yeaah 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Sadly, no... 19. Do you like bubble baths? LOVE bubble baths  20. Do you like your neighbors? don’t know them but sure  21. What are you bad habits? anything that falls under the category of my addiction 22. Where would you like to travel? Dream destination is Thai land or Switzerland  23. Do you have trust issues? mmm yeah I guess I do kinda  24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Eating.. or picking my cat up and hugging him  25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Pretty much the lot of it  26. What do you do when you wake up? snooze my alarm and try like hell to sleep more but it never works  27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? nahhh 28. Who are you most comfortable around? Does my cat count? 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Yes  30. Do you ever want to get married? Yes  31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? yes it is finally.. tho I wanna chop it all off again 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Blake Lively Ryan Reynolds  33. Spell your name with your chin. assahjnlerdyhuj   :)  34. Do you play sports? What sports? lol no... does yoga count? 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? hands down TV please take it away now  36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? nope I’m pretty much extremely forward 37. What do you say during awkward silences? Welp this is awkward  38. Describe your dream girl/guy? I pretty much like everyone so....  39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? tattoo shops :) 40. What do you want to do after high school? I long since been out of HS and I guess travel? 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? honestly yes but certainly beware of being taken advantage of which is something I fall into all too often  42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? that I’m either concentrating.. or I’m fucking PISSED off and need to just be left the fuck alone and sit in my head  43. Do you smile at strangers? very awkwardly yes  44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? I know the ocean should be explored more but fucking SPAAAAACE  45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? the basic need to survive and pay for my existence otherwise I rarely can scrape my meat sack of a body out of my bed yay depression  46. What are you paranoid about? failing.. isn’t everyone? 47. Have you ever been high? on pretty much anything you could think of.. yeah 48. Have you ever been drunk? ohhhh yes I have been many moods of intoxicated  49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Nope 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Black  51. Ever wished you were someone else? ohh fuck yeah all the time don’t we all have Instagram 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? talking myself out of things because I’m afraid to fail  53. Favourite makeup brand? Thrive causemetics  54. Favourite store? Target  55. Favourite blog? My besties blog :) 56. Favourite colour? Green or yellow  57. Favourite food? Vegan sushi or burritos or pizzzzza bc I am trash  58. Last thing you ate? a hersheys kiss  59. First thing you ate this morning? a hersheys kiss... lol  60. Ever won a competition? For what? lol a dance competition when I was 19 at a house party  61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? suspended many many many times.. mainly insubordination... or never showing up to class or being mega late to class  62. Been arrested? For what? yes. shoplifting/dui/possession/possession of paraphernalia/underage drinking/truancy   63. Ever been in love? yes :) 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? I was living in Georgia I was 4 or 5 years old and my neighborhood friend was chasing me and chasing me and chasing me and I ran around the corner of our apartment complex and was hiding against the wall and he showed up behind me and tapped me on the shoulder and said “wait wait I have a secret to tell you” and then proceeded to kiss me on my lips and I of course responded “ewwwwwwwww” 65. Are you hungry right now? FUCKING STARVING  66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? my real friends or on tumblr so.. yes? 67. Facebook or Twitter? I like reading tweets more than fb statuses buuut I browse FB more 68. Twitter or Tumblr? TUMBLR  69. Are you watching tv right now? nahh 70. Names of your bestfriends? Max :) Julie annnd Stanley  71. Craving something? What? success in my new job... and sushi also a fucking back massage 72. What colour are your towels? yellow and grey  72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3  73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? if my fat cat counts then yes  74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? none other than my cats  75. Favourite animal? Obviously my cat... but I’d have to say a Manta Ray  76. What colour is your underwear? tye dye  77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate 4 eva  78. Favourite ice cream flavour? I’m boring I like chocolate and peanut butter only for sweets ever  79. What colour shirt are you wearing? black  80. What colour pants? currently wearing my work scrubs so navy blue  81. Favourite tv show? Adventure time  82. Favourite movie? What dreams may come is my go to fav.. but I think that might change soon.. also fav christmas movie is a year without a santa claus and I hate christmas  83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Is this even a real question? Is there a mean girls 2?  84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Mean girls  85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Kevin G  86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? fuckin Marlin of course  87. First person you talked to today? virtually?.. my girlfriend... in person?.. my boss  88. Last person you talked to today? Days not over but also my girlfriend  89. Name a person you hate? Donald Trump  90. Name a person you love? my niece  91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Pretty much always donald trump 92. In a fight with someone? nope? 93. How many sweatpants do you have? 3  94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? like at least 5? 95. Last movie you watched? Suspiria  96. Favourite actress? ooof I’m awful at names of people and honestly don’t care for pop culture sorry  97. Favourite actor? see above  98. Do you tan a lot? what is sunlight?  99. Have any pets? 3 cats 2 snakes 1 leopard gecko  100. How are you feeling? hungry  101. Do you type fast? on a computer yes.. texting.. nah  102. Do you regret anything from your past? I struggle with this because I am happy where I’m at in my life and if it wasn’t for all of those shitty mistakes I’ve made I wouldn’t be here right now appreciating my existence.. but also yes I do regret a lot of actions and decisions i’ve made and how I’ve treated a lot of people but you live and you learn I guess and I’ve learned to appreciate all of those things  103. Can you spell well? Incredibly well  104. Do you miss anyone from your past? My parents  105. Ever been to a bonfire party? So many and they are some of my favorite kind of parties more parties should be held outside  106. Ever broken someone’s heart? unfortunately yes.. but this is a part of growth for everyone in life  107. Have you ever been on a horse? yes :)  108. What should you be doing? probably my job but I’m sucked into tumblr per usual  109. Is something irritating you right now? my annoying need to be perfect at mostly everything and also i’m irritated with how hungry I am  110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? uhhhh I don’t think so? I’ve never really understood someone saying that.. I mean there are things about loving someone or not being able to love someone in a certain way that can be painful sooo if that’s what it means then yes  111. Do you have trust issues? I feel like  I was already asked this question sooo yes? 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? My partner  113. What was your childhood nickname? peanut or jellybean ash AJ  114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes  115. Do you play the Wii? nahh  116. Are you listening to music right now? Yaaa  117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? nahh I’m a vegetarian  118. Do you like Chinese food? ehhhh I like fried rice? but I like thai food  119. Favourite book? I guess that would have to be my yoga book “finding balance” only because its the book I most frequent otherwise I like far too many to have a favorite life changing book would be “You are a badass” 120. Are you afraid of the dark? I am if I sense some bad energy in that darkness but nah not usually  121. Are you mean? I always inform everyone upon meeting me that I am indeed an asshole but everyone always insists that that information is false.... but yeah I’m super mean  122. Is cheating ever okay? I have cheated in my relationships and no its never okay  123. Can you keep white shoes clean? nooope I like earth too much  124. Do you believe in love at first sight? nahh 125. Do you believe in true love? ehhh?  126. Are you currently bored? EXTREMELY  127. What makes you happy? Books.. photographing things... music.. my cat.. being with my friends.. eating foooood.. meditating... exercising  128. Would you change your name? totally.. just have no idea to what  129. What your zodiac sign? Aries.. can ya tell?  130. Do you like subway? Honestly... no  131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? hug em  132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my roomiee stop asking me 133. Favourite lyrics right now? hmm idk?  Lost on you by LP I guess?  134. Can you count to one million? probably?  135. Dumbest lie you ever told? I mean pretty much all of them have been dumb so I have no idea?  136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? open  137. How tall are you? 5 5 ? 5 6? no idea  138. Curly or Straight hair? wavvvvvvvyyyy 139. Brunette or Blonde? Jet black  140. Summer or Winter? Spring  141. Night or Day? Night  142. Favourite month? September  143. Are you a vegetarian? Yes  144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? ooooof.. white chocolate  145. Tea or Coffee? Espresso  146. Was today a good day? mediocre but can still find appreciation for it  147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers  148. What’s your favourite quote? If by favorite you mean favorite(s) then...

"My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style"  

"Once upon a time there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. And they grew next to each other. And every day the straight tree would look at the crooked tree and he would say, 'You're crooked. You've always been crooked and you'll continue to be crooked. But look at me! Look at me!' said the straight tree. He said, 'I'm tall and I'm straight.' And then one day the lumberjacks came into the forest and looked around, and the manager in charge said, 'Cut all the straight trees.' And that crooked tree is still there to this day, growing strong and growing strange." Kneller

149. Do you believe in ghosts? Nope  150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? 

“ With each breath may we take refuge in the living truth alone, released from coarse arrogance and subtle pride.”

(via itsgracesdrunkmametown)

[ethelbertpaul444-blog]

Mindful sex: could it put an end to unhappiness in bed?

Mindfulness has been used to treat depression and encourage healthy eating. Now, with huge numbers of men and women reporting sexual dissatisfaction, it is being applied to our relationships So there you are, in bed with your partner, having perfectly pleasant if serviceable sex, when your mind starts to wander: what was it you meant to put on your shopping list? Why didnt your boss reply to your email? Dont forget its bin day tomorrow. Many of us feel disconnected during sex some or most of the time. At the more extreme end, sexual dysfunction erectile problems, vaginal pain, zero libido can severely hamper our quality of life and our relationships. In many cases, there could be a relatively simple, if not easily achieved, fix: mindfulness. In essence, mindfulness involves paying attention to what is happening in the present moment and noticing, without judgment, your thoughts and feelings. It can reconnect us with our bodies stopping us spending so much time in our heads and reduce stress. It has been used by the NHS as a treatment for recurrent depression and popular books and apps have made it part of many peoples everyday lives. After mindful eating, drinking, parenting and working, mindful lovemaking is starting to be recognised more widely as a way to improve ones sex life. (Earlier this year, the couples therapist Diana Richardson gave a TEDx talk on mindfulness in sex, which has been viewed 170,000 times on YouTube.) A survey published in June by Public Health England found that 49% of 25- to 34-year-old women complained of a lack of sexual enjoyment; across all ages, 42% of women were dissatisfied. The most recent National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles, published in 2013, found that people in Britain were having less sex than they once did, with low sexual function affecting about 15% of men and 30% of women. Difficulty achieving orgasm was reported by 16% of women, while 15% of men suffered premature ejaculation and 13% experienced erectile dysfunction. Problems with sexual response were common, affecting 42% of men and 51% of women who reported one or more problems in the last year. Watch Diana Richardsons TEDx talk on mindfulness in sex. At the time, the researchers said modern life could be affecting our sex drives. People are worried about their jobs, worried about money. They are not in the mood for sex, said Cath Mercer from University College London. But we also think modern technologies are behind the trend, too. People have tablets and smartphones and they are taking them into the bedroom, using Twitter and Facebook, answering emails. Mindfulness is one of the tools that can help people focus in a world full of distractions. Kate Moyle, a psychosexual and couples therapist, says mindfulness is a recognised part of therapeutic work, even if it has not always been given that name. When people have sexual problems, a lot of the time its anxiety-related and theyre not really in their bodies, or in the moment. Mindfulness brings them back into the moment. When people say theyve had the best sex and you ask them what they were thinking about, they cant tell you, because they werent thinking about anything, they were just enjoying the moment. Thats mindfulness. Moyle says the techniques involve encouraging people to focus on their sensations, explore their senses, hone in on what is happening in their body and how theyre experiencing it. A simple exercise Moyle recommends is getting in touch with the senses in the shower listen to the noise, the sensation of the water on your skin, notice any smells, see what the water tastes like, look around you. Youre really encouraging people to try to stay in their bodies, rather than be in their heads. Its about refocusing their attention on what they can feel right now. Ammanda Major, the head of clinical practice at the relationship support organisation Relate, says mindful sex is about focusing in the moment on whats going on for you and making sure all the extraneous things get left behind. For example, if youre being touched by your partner, its really focusing on those sensations. People may find themselves very distracted during sex, so this is a way of bringing themselves into their body and being totally aware of themselves in that moment. It is now part of the standard advice and support Relate offers to clients, she says. It can feel clunky to start with, but with practice people realise theyre able to engage in mindfulness without realising theyre doing it. In short, it becomes a way of life. Other than focusing on sensations, people can bring into sex an awareness of how nice your partner feels, or how nice they smell, or the sound of their voice something that will bring you right back into the moment. When you have thoughts that distract you, one of the key issues is not to blame yourself, but just to acknowledge it and cast them adrift. Kate Moyle recommends getting in touch with the senses in the shower listen to the noise, the sensation of the water on your skin … Illustration: Joel Burden/Guardian At the Jane Wadsworth sexual function clinic at St Marys hospital in London, mindfulness is used in almost all sexual problems, says David Goldmeier, a clinical lead and consultant in sexual medicine. These approaches have been used in sex therapy since the 50s, but they were not known as mindfulness at the time. The American researchers William Masters and Virginia Johnson used a technique called sensate focus, emphasising the exploration of physical sensations rather than focusing on the goal of orgasm. A mindful approach can help men with erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. If you have a man who has an erection problem and is stressed by it, a lot of his mind [during sex] will be worrying: Have I got an erection or not? says Goldmeier. It is also used to help men and women who find it hard to orgasm or have low desire, as well as in sexual problems relating to abuse. In our clinic, we see an awful lot of people with historical sexual abuse and [mindfulness is] a foundation for the trauma therapy they have. It is useful in sexual problems that are based in large part on past sexual abuse, he says. Lori Brotto, one of the leading researchers in this area, agrees. In her book Better Sex Through Mindfulness, she wrote of a study she published in 2012, which noted that teaching sexual abuse survivors to mindfully pay attention to the present moment, to notice their genital sensations and to observe thoughts simply as events of the mind, led to marked reductions in their levels of distress during sex. Brotto is a professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia and the executive director of the Womens Health Research Institute in Canada. Having started sex research during her graduate degree, she began studying mindfulness in 2002. Mindfulness-based treatments had been used effectively for people with suicidal tendencies these ancient techniques started to be used widely in western medicine in the 70s and Brotto realised they could also be helpful for addressing the sexual concerns of women who had survived cancer. What struck me was … how the patients I was seeing with suicidal tendencies, who would talk about feeling disconnected from themselves and having a real lack of awareness of their internal sensations, were very similar to the women with sexual concerns, she says. At that time, I thought: If mindfulness could be an effective way of staying in the present and helping them manage these out-of-control behaviours, I wonder if it could also be a tool to help women reconnect with their sexual selves and improve their sexual functioning. Sexual problems can be caused by a huge range of factors. Depression and stress can be triggers, as can the side-effects of antidepressants. Over time, these side-effects can become a psychological factor, as people worry that they are no longer sexually responsive. Problems can also be caused by physical conditions such as vaginal pain, or inhibitions and shame about sexual desire, particularly for some women and people in same-sex relationships. Survivors of sexual abuse, who learned to dissociate during an assault, can also experience distressing sexual problems in a later consensual and otherwise happy relationship. Mindfulness is such a simple practice, but it really addresses many of the reasons why people have sexual concerns, says Brotto. At its most basic, she explains, mindfulness is defined as present-moment nonjudgmental awareness. Each of those three components are critical for healthy sexual function. For a lot of women who report low desire, lack of response and low arousal in particular, all three of those domains are problematic. Being present is critical. Then there is the nonjudgmental part countless studies have shown that people who have sexual difficulties tend also to have very negative and catastrophic thoughts: If I dont respond, my partner will leave me, or: If I dont have an adequate level of desire, Im broken. Mindfulness and paying attention nonjudgmentally is about evoking compassion for yourself. Body image issues come up consistently, she says. Women will often say they prefer to have the lights off, or theyll redirect their partners hands away from the areas of their body theyre not happy with, or they may be worrying that a partner is perceiving their body in a negative way. All of those things serve to remove them from the present moment. William Masters and Virginia Johnson. Photograph: Alamy As for awareness, Brotto says, lots of data shows us that women, more so than men, tend to be somewhat disconnected from whats happening in their bodies. Her experiments have shown that women can experience physical arousal, such as increased blood flow to their vagina, but it barely registers mentally. There may be a strong physiological response, [but] theres no awareness in their mind of that response. We know that healthy sexual response requires the integration of the brain and body, so when the mind is elsewhere whether its distracted or consumed with catastrophic thoughts all of that serves to interrupt that really important feedback loop. It can be the same for some men, she says, but there tends to be more concordance between the bodys arousal and the minds arousal. When men have a physical response, theyre also much more likely to have a mental sexual arousal response. While working with a group or a sex therapist can be helpful for people with sexual concerns, others can teach themselves mindfulness techniques using books or any number of apps. In her book, Brotto says mindfulness practice can be as simple as focusing on your breath. An exercise she uses involves focusing on a raisin (this is a well-established practice and there are many tutorials online). First, scrutinise it its shape, size, smell, feel, its ridges and valleys then put it to your lips and notice your anticipation and salivary response; finally, bite into it and observe, in detail, the taste and texture. This can teach us to focus on sensations and the moment, rather than mindlessly eating a handful of raisins. The same sort of attention can be applied to sex. In Brottos eight-week group programme, people practice mindfulness techniques for 30 minutes each day, followed by a maintenance plan of between 10 and 15 minutes a day. For someone doing it on their own, she recommends starting with 10 minutes a day and trying to include a few 30-minute sessions. The benefit of a longer practice is you get to deal with things such as boredom and frustration, and physical discomfort in the body, all of which you want to be able to work through, she says. A body scan is one of our favourites within the sexuality realm that involves closing your eyes and really tuning in to the different sensations in different parts of your body and not trying to change anything, just observing. If people can start to do that in their life generally, on a regular basis, they strengthen that mindfulness muscle and start to become more aware generally and they can take that newfound awareness into their sexuality. When we have better sex, we tend to want more of it, so it becomes a satisfying circle. Desire is not a fixed level that each one of us has, but rather is adaptive and responsive to our situation, says Brotto. When sex is not satisfying, it makes sense that the brain adjusts itself and creates less [desire]. Mindful sex does not have to be an intense, time-consuming session. It can be very everyday; it doesnt have to be a different type of sex, says Moyle. You might have sex the same way, in the same position, but youre in a different headspace, so youre experiencing it differently. People can think: Im not into mindfulness, or: Its a bit spiritual and Im not, but it doesnt have to be that. It can just be really straightforward focusing your attention and fully experiencing sensations. Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/aug/28/mindful-sex-could-it-put-an-end-to-unhappiness-in-bed http://dailybuzznetwork.com/index.php/2018/10/06/mindful-sex-could-it-put-an-end-to-unhappiness-in-bed/

[fadingpersoncollectorstuff-blog]

Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

"Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolutions.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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What's Toronto cheap auto insurance/Broker?

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Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.

What % of my budget should health insurance be?

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Proof of insurance in Texas?

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I was recently pulled over by a police officer and written a $239 ticket for going 60mph in a 35mph school zone. The DMV just sent me a notice that I have received six points on my license and instructed me to attend an eight hour driver's improvement class. I'm seventeen. How much should I expect my insurance costs to rise?

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A few weeks ago my car was rear ended and has minor frame damage from the collision. The insurance adjustor's checked it out and offered me $700 to fix the paint on the bumper, repair the bumper support and 2 hours on a frame rack. Details about my car: The passenger rear taillight is pushed in about a centimeter - the quarter panel now sticks out a tad and is crumpled in the wheelwell - my passenger framerail has a warp in it from the accident. Now they are claiming that my car was in a previous accident because of filler paint or something in the trunk. They claim that because I have a hole cut into my frame rail that the car was previously pulled and that's where the damage came from. I drove the car for 4 years, I think I'd know if my taillight was pushed in and my quarter panel was sticking out. They told me to take it to an auto body to have it looked at and they would contact them on a final settlement - BUT I feel the car is unsafe to drive. I do not want to drive a car with previous frame damage (fixed). Would I be able to take the money and buy a different car without the body shop doing work on it?""

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Hi I'm 20 years old and i want to know what is the age limit medical insurance covers? I hardly use it and now that i need it to have an eye check, I don't know if it will cover me... I reside in California. Thank You!""

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Why is my car insurance so expensive?

I am trying to figure out why my car insurance costs so much, and I am having problems getting a straight answer from any insurance company. In the last 5 years I have 0 speeding tickets, no dui's, and 1 not at fault accident. I am a 26 year old male with full coverage on an 07 Cobalt ls, so not even a sports car. The absolute cheapest insurance I could find is just shy of 350$ a month. Most companies wouldn't even cover me, and none of them would tell me why. So if anyone has any ideas of what could be causing this I would really appreciate it.""

Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.

""Will my insurance rates go up if I got a ticket for driving in the HOV lane on I-95 in Broward County, FL?""

I was just pulled over for driving in the HOV lane on I-95 and got a ticket for $165 (kinda steep in my opinion, but the cop said he wasn't giving me a ticket for speeding). The cop said that I won't get points on my record and I verified that with the Florida Department of Motor Vehicle's web-site. I know I'm guilty so I'll just pay the ticket. Will my insurance rates go up if I do that? Should I plead no contest and go to traffic school? I'd still have to pay for my traffic ticket if I did that, but if going that route would stop my insurance rates from going up then it will financially worth it in the long run.""

Can i get a better insurance for my car?

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Insurance question for my car?

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I have called for quotes.. to many auto insurance companies. But since this my first time purchase I am confused, Can someone break down the features of a policy, what am i to have, what is reccomended. thanks , any details will help.""

Who regulates auto insurance in CA?

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I just got into a car accident and whats going to happen if i dont have insurance for that car?

Okay so on Monday, I was parked on one side of the street and because of street cleaning I uturned across the street into two other cars that were parked and some lady backed up trying to park in thee space that i was in. she did not look back i guess. It's clearly her fault but the thing is that that car does not have insurance. My other 3 cars are insured just that one is not because my brother gave it to me to sell. I am wondering what is going to happen because she reported to insurance. Wiill i get in trouble? ( I'm under 18) Do i get money from her insurance company? Will I have to pay for her damages even though it was 100% her fault? and what do i do now? Her insurance agent called me but i called back and cannot get a hold of her. Thanks for the help""

What makes insurance rates for coupes higher than sedans?

What makes insurance rates for coupes higher than sedans?

How do traffic tickets affect insurance premiums?

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How much will my car insurance cost?

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Is my Car Insurance Valid?

If i use my Aunty name (dose not live with me and lives one mile away from my home) as the Main Driver and my name as the second driver on our car insurance policy (as it saves me some money and even i will be the main driver) will my insurance is valid? Please help me. If it is not, please tell me how can i save money by using her name as she is an experienced driver. Many thanks.""

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I'm 18. I work two jobs unfortunately with no insurance or benefits! How can I get health insurance? I live in Wi.

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I am living with my boyfriend for a year can I go on his health insurance

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I'm a newer driver and have never owned a car. I'm looking into buying one and I want to know about the average insurance costs. I've been told that SUVs have higher insurance costs. I'm looking into a 03 Ford Escape, is that considered an SUV? Also, how much is the average cost difference (of insurance!) if I was comparing it to a car such as a 03 Pontiac grand am? I realize this might be a dumb question and probably varies a lot, but a general answer is all I'm asking for!""

Car accident but no car insurance?

I was just in a car accident in which I was not at fault and the other driver was ticketed. I live in Florida and while my car was insured with PIP coverage under my fathers name. I was exempt from the coverage. I had to go to the hospital to get CT scans of my brain and neck area as well as multiple xrays. The other driver did have insurance and I wanted to know even though I had no insurance, when the drivers' insurance company gives me the compensating cash amount would I be able to use the hospital bills as part of the compensating amount? I know the reason you have car insurance is to cover any medical injury in an accident but I unfortunately didn't have the means. any info would be greatly appreciated!""

How much will insurance go up for a 17 yr old female with 6 months driving experience in an accident?

Accident was her fault. She rear ended a truck. The truck wasnt hurt at all but the car was totaled pretty much. Ticket was failure to reduce speed to avoid an accident. What is a rough estimate of how much insurance will go up for her?

If im on my parents insurance when i buy my motorcycle do i have to pay for insurance?

I have to save for it and its hard to get a job in Jacksonville if your a teen so how much the insurance cost and do I need it if I do have to buy it or can I just buy the motorcycle and go its the Honda cbr250r its the only in my price range for now

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How much a month will insurance be on a 2003 Nissan 350z with a 19 year old driver, (2 yrs exp)?""

Getting Car insurance after DUI?

I live in Toronto - anyone have any experience with this? It was over 6 years ago - any companies to recommend?

Turning 17 thinking of buying a car (Insurance Cover) [UK]?

Im going to turn 17 soon and thinking of buying a car and really want a BMW. I know I cannot get it because the insurance will be ridiculously high or simply will not insure me so I was wondering if I get a really rubbish car (1 litre or something) and get it Fully Comprehensive this should give me cheap insurance and the privilege to drive another car (so I heard) like my dads BMW and I want to know if this is possible for me and any background information about this will be appreciated!

Which car insurance companies insure electric cars?

My insurance company will not insure electric cars. Which will?

Cheap car insurance for young male drivers?

where is the best place to get cheap car insurance for a young male driver??

Pregnant and no insurance?

Im 16, And im pregnant. My father doesn't qualify for insurance. and cant afford for insurance. I Live in California what do i do?""

What is the coverage characteristics of disability insurance?

What is the coverage characteristics of disability insurance?

Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.

Can I get long term disability insurance and social security?

Long term disability insurance from the company I work for. If I get that,can I apply for ss?""

2006 Dodge Charger R/T insurance?

I'm 19 years old, and I am very interested into buying a 2006 Dodge Charger R/T. 5.7L V8. I'm a responsible driver with a flawless driving history and have taken (and passed) a driver's education course. The thing I'm concerned about though is the insurance for the vehicle. What makes a car (in itself) have high insurance? Is it based on the performance and power alone, or do other factors come into play such as the size and number of doors? Would a V8 Charger in particular have ridiculously high insurance compared to a more sporty car such as a V8 Mustang of the same year? Well, you probably understand what I'm trying to ask. Someone please enlighten me, thanks. I appreciate it =)""

Luxury cars with low insurance rates?

I was wondering what types of luxury cars would have the lowest insurance rates? I would prefer either a sedan or coupe. So in the category of luxury sedan/coupe, what would be the lowest insurance rate? I don't care about the price of the car itself, I just want one that doesn't have me paying a bunch every month, non-stop. My definition of low is around the neighborhood of $60, preferably lower obviously. If there is no such thing, then please tell me the closest to it. Thank you in advance.""

Is it cheaper on insurance to have 2 people on the title?

I don't have a very good driving record, and when I had insurance under my name on my old car, I was paying almost as much as the monthly car payments. The bank I received the loan from told me that I had to have insurance under my name on the car. I'm looking to get a new car, and I know that the insurance alone would cost me a lot. If I put someone else's name (such as my father) on the title, along with mine, would I be able to get insurance under his name?""

How to get cheap car insurance?

i want to know that how to get cheap first car insurance in u.k?

Where can I get the best Auto Insurance Quotes?

My semi-annual auto insurance renewal is coming up. I've shopped before and I think I'm already getting a damn good rate, but still I'd like to try to get an even better rate. I've tried both Geico and Progressive, and both quoted me over $200 higher per year than I already pay. Any other good suggestions? This would be for coverage in California.""

How can I get the best and competitive online insurance quotes?

How can I get the best and competitive online insurance quotes?

Buying a car but don't have insurance?

I'm in the process of getting my first car in my name on my own insurance.. How do I go about doing that? I can't get the insurance without knowing exactly what car I am getting, but my understanding is that I can't drive the car off the dealers lot until I have insurance in order to drive it home? What to do? Thanks, Chris""

Rough Insurance Quotes (Guesses welcome)?

I am first in line for several used cars I'm considering. The only thing I'm worried about are insurance rates. I'm only 19 and I've had my license for less than 6 months. I will be signed on with my parents, and they are with Geico. The three cars I'm considering are a 2000 Ford Mustang, a 2004 Honda Civic and a 2001 Kia Rio. How much would you guess it would cost me a month/year to insure?""

USAA vs Navy Fed for banking & car insurance?

i actually have a few questions. Being new in the Marine Corps, im trying to find the best deals. So far ive heard that USAA and Navy Fed are the best for both banking (loans, general banking), and also car insurance. So which one is better in your opinion? Have you dealt with both or know the ups and downs of both? Should i go to USAA/Navy Fed for both, or do a mix of the two for my needs?""

What size engine should i get for cheap insurance?

It will be my first car, and i don't really want to be paying allot on insurance, but want a nice nippy little motor. So what size is cheap for insurance but not too small to be really really slow lol.""

Car insurance for 16 year old?

I am 16. Live in Miami, Florida. Drive a Toyota Corolla 1992. I want the insurance that I'll only be paying to cover the repairs of the other car if i get into an accident and not mine. About how much do you think the insurance will cost me? Oh and I plan to pay for the full year in one full payment and not monthly.""

A good nursing school in the Philippines?

I have been waiting to get in the nursing program in California for a year and half and losing hope already. Some of my friends finished the nursing program in the Philippines and are ...show more

USAA insurance rates from traffic ticket?

I received a traffic ticket for following too closely and was clocked at 17mph going through town. The car in front of me had pulled away from the stoplight and was clearly not interested in speeding up, so I had to speed up some to signal into the adjoining lane to pass him. This was during rush hour, so traffic was pretty heavy. The cop pulled me over and cited me for following too closely which carries a $115 fine. He asked me why I thought he pulled me over, and I honestly had no idea what I did wrong. Unfortunately, he would not concede to a simple warning and cited me anyway. I also received a ticket about 11 months ago for not coming to a complete stop at a stop sign before turning. USAA did not increase my rates from this ticket, but I am concerned that they might increase my rates if they find out about the latest ticket. Should I plead not guilty and have a trial date set to fight this, or just pay the fine and pray that USAA doesn't pick it up? Does anyone else have experience with two minor traffic violations within one year and USAA auto rates?""

Changing car insurance beneficiaries during a divorce?

IS IT TRUE THAT MY SOON-TO-BE EX HUSBAND CAN'T CHANGE OUR CAR INSURANCE POLICY UNTIL OUR DIVORCE IS FINAL??? I NEED HELP WITH THIS... IT SAYS THAT HE CANT MAKE ANY CHANGES TO IT IN THE SUMMONS THAT WAS GIVEN TO HIM BUT I WANT TO KNOW HOW LNG UNTIL HE CAN CHANGE IT BECAUSE HE IS TRYING TO CHANGE IT NOW

Can I sue Insurance company for not insuring my husband as agreed on the phone?

I didn't receive the policy and my husband drove unknowingly uninsured as a named driver. The police stopped him and took the car. Could I claim breach of contract? How much compensation would I get? What kind of solicitors should I contact - no win no fee type preferably....

Will I have to switch my car insurance if I buy a new or used car from a dealer?

My current car is just costing far too much money in repairs for it to be worth it to keep piling money into. I'm a college student, so money isn't exactly plentiful, but its looking right now like I just need a new car, period. I have a decent job, and I could probably afford a car payment of around $200 a month just fine, however I am very concerned about any hidden cost with insurance. My dad told me that if I buy a car from a dealer, then I will have to switch my insurance to full coverage (I'm currently just on my dads insurance, and I only have to pay about $50 a month) but he says that if I get a new or used car from a dealer, I will have to change my insurance coverage and it will cost me more around 150-200 a month in insurance. And if you pair that with a car payment, I simply couldn't afford it and still be able to make rent and whatnot. So I came here to see if he is correct in this. I know there will be taxes, dealer fees, registration costs etc. but Its the insurance part of it that might make it impossible. Also, do I have to have my credit established for a certain amount of time before I can buy a car? I tried to avoid credit cards for as long as I could, so now Im still kind of new in the whole credit game.... Anyways, thank you for taking the time to read my question and hopefully answer it!! It is much appreciated!!""

How much is the insurance for a 1980-1992 FERRARI MONDIAL?

how much is isurance every year for a 1980-1992 FERRARI MONDIAL for a 16 year old in California using 21st century auto insurance. PS onlyh liablity insurance

Car insurance for 18 year old male?

Hi I live in Windsor ON. And I need car insurance I have a 96' Ford Escort 4 door lx. Everywhere I have called has given me very high rates. Please help :)

Whats the cheapest car insurance company in Missouri?

I am 20 and attend college. I never needed a car before but now that I have to start driving, I have to get my driver's license. I have my permit and a car but since I need legal tags and insurance to take the driving test. I have to get insurance before I can get tags. So I wanted to know whats the best insurance company for me, where prices won't be outrageous??? Thanks for the help: )""

What car insurance do you have?

Im trying to find one that's cheaper I recently have 21st Century. What's the name of your car insurance and do you like it?

Does anyone have a Pontiac G6 GTP?? i need to know how much car insurance are on the them?? please let me know

Does anyone have a Pontiac G6 GTP?? i need to know how much car insurance are on the them?? please let me know

I have have 14 points on my license i need a cheap insurance?

some companys have a limit on points

Whats the cheapest car insurance company in Missouri?

I am 20 and attend college. I never needed a car before but now that I have to start driving, I have to get my driver's license. I have my permit and a car but since I need legal tags and insurance to take the driving test. I have to get insurance before I can get tags. So I wanted to know whats the best insurance company for me, where prices won't be outrageous??? Thanks for the help: )""

About how much of your base pay do you spend every month? (US Military).?

I am just curious. I will go into the US Army as an E2. (So I will be making $1568.7). How much do you spend on car, insurance, phones and internet? (I do not drink.)""

Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/do-i-need-licenseregistration-motorized-bicycle-50cc-gas-clements/"

[themoneybuff-blog]

A brief history of U.S. homeownership

During the month of May at Get Rich Slowly, were going to turn our attention to home and garden topics. To start, I want to take a brief look at the history of the U.S. housing market. Some folks might find this dry. I think its fascinating. Private land ownership is baked into the U.S. culture and Constitution. Its part of the material plenty we expect from the American Dream. For most Americans, homeownership implies success and freedom and wealth. But for a long time, homeownership was the exception rather than the rule. Only farmers were likely to own land and a house during the countrys early days. With the coming of the Industrial Revolution, homeownership became more common for urban dwellers. Still, less than half of all Americans owned their homes until the late 1940s. Heres how U.S. homeownership rates of changed over the past 128 years according to the U.S. Census Bureau and the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis:

The current U.S. homeownership rate as of January 2018 is 64.2%. Im sure you could write a doctoral thesis on the reasons for the growth of homeownership over time. Im not going to do that. After several hours of research into the history of mortgages and the real-estate industry, I feel like we can summarize everything in a few paragraphs. This article which is information-only will serve as background for future Get Rich Slowly discussions about homeownership. In the Beginning During the 1800s, most folks had no way to own a house. They didnt have the lump sum required to make the purchase, and banks wouldnt lend money for average people to buy homes. Mortgages didnt become common until the U.S. banking system was stabilized following the National Bank Acts of the 1860s. After this reform, banks began to experiment with lending money for homes, and by the 1890s, mortgages were popular across the U.S although not precisely as we know them today. A typical mortgage in the early 1900s might have a term of five years and require a 50% down payment. Plus, they were usually structured with interest-only monthly payments and a balloon payment for the entire principal at the end of the term. Borrowers could (and did) renegotiate their loans every year. Compare this to modern mortgages, which usually have 30-year terms and require a down payment of only five to twenty percent. (I bought my first home in 1993 with a down payment of less than one percent!)

These early mortgages worked fine until the Great Depression. When that crisis hit, banks had no money to lend and the average borrower had no cash either. As a result, potential homeowners couldnt afford to buy, and many existing homeowners defaulted. (At one point during the 1930s, nearly 10% of all homes were in foreclosure!) Note: This article originally appeared at Money Boss in April 2016. Ive updated text-based stats through 2018, but graphics-based data is two years old. However, nothing material has changed in the past 24 months. Bubbles and Booms To stabilize the housing market, the U.S. government created the Home Owners Loan Corporation in 1933, the Federal Housing Administration in 1934, and the Federal National Mortgage Association (now Fannie Mae) in 1938. These institutions helped to arrest the housing crash and, eventually, spur homeownership to new heights. But it was the G.I. Bill of 1944, which provided subsidized mortgages for World War II veterans, that changed the face of the housing industry and the American economy. From encyclopedia.com: The GI Bills mortgage subsidies led to an escalated demand for housing and the development of suburbs. One-fifth of all single-family homes built in the 20 years following World War II were financed with help from the GI Bills loan guarantee program, symbolizing the emergence of a new middle class. As homebuying became more common (and more complicated), real-estate brokers helped sellers find buyers for their homes. The National Association of Real Estate Boards adopted the term Realtor in 1916. As the housing market boomed during the 1940s and 1950s, so did the real-estate profession. By 1950, for the first time in American history, more than half of all Americans owned their homes. As demand for housing increased, so did prices. For 25 years, Yale economics professor Robert Shiller has tracked U.S. home prices. He monitors current prices, yes, but hes also researched historical prices. Hes gathered all of this info into a spreadsheet, which he updates regularly and makes freely available on his website. This graph of Shillers data (through January 2016) shows how housing prices have changed over time:

Shillers index is inflation-adjusted and based on sale prices of existing homes (not new construction). It uses 1890 as an arbitrary benchmark, which is assigned a value of 100. (To me, 110 looks like baseline normal. Maybe 1890 was a down year?) As you can see, home prices bounced around until the mid 1910s, at which point they dropped sharply. This decline was due largely to new mass-production techniques, which lowered the cost of building a home. (For thirty years, you could order your home from Sears!) Prices didnt recover until the conclusion of World War II and the coming of the G.I. Bill. From the 1950s until the mid-1990s, home prices hovered around 110 on the Shiller scale. For the past twenty years, the U.S. housing market has been a wild ride. We experienced an enormous bubble (and its aftermath) during the late 2000s. It looks very much like were at the front end of another bubble today. As of December 2017, home prices were at about 170 on the Shiller scale. What caused the housing bubble during the last decade? And whats feeding the current buying frenzy? Thats a great question, and its open to debate. Some folks blame loose lending standards. Some blame a lack of government oversight. Some blame real-estate speculators. Some blame the American propensity for consumption. Some blame cheerleading from the real-estate industry. Me? I think its a little of everything.

Bigger Everything! Naturally, increased home prices and increased ownership rates brought increased mortgages. During the past fifty years, long-term mortgages with large balances became more common until now theyre the standard. Between 1949 and the turn of the twenty-first century, mortgage debt relative to total income of the average household rose from 20% to 73%, and from 15% to 41% relative to total household assets. One reason mortgage sizes have increased is that housing sizes have increased. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the median size for a new home built in 1973 was 1525 square feet. By 2016, that number had jumped to 2422 square feet. In those forty years, kitchen sizes have doubled, ceilings have risen more than a foot, and bedrooms have grown by more than 50 square feet. But home sizes are ballooning even as households are shrinking! The average household had 2.9 people in 1973. In 2016, the average household had 2.5 people. Lets run the numbers: Forty years ago, we had 526 square feet of living space per person; today, we have 969 square feet of living space per person. To me, this seems crazy. Why do we need such huge houses? Whats the point? And do homeowners truly consider the costs when they choose to buy big? A larger home doesnt just carry a larger purchase price. It costs more to maintain. It costs more to light, to heat, and to furnish. For too many people, big homes are the destroyer of dreams. (Im not joking. I truly believe this.) Full disclosure: In the past, Ive been guilty of pursuing home-size inflation myself, although I eventually came to see the error of my ways. My first house (purchased in 1993) had 1383 square feet. My second house (purchased in 2004) had 1814 square feet. That was peak bigness for me. The condo I sold last year had 1547 square feet. And the house we moved into last July has 1235 square feet. I think about 1000 square feet is ideal, but Kim likes having the extra room. Im not saying you should live in a shack. Nor am I suggesting everyone should own a tiny home. But I believe its important to be logical when it comes to housing. Remember that size comes with a price. If you need the space, buy it. If you dont, youre better off saving your money for something else. The Bottom Line Housing is by far the largest expense in the typical budget. According to the U.S. governments 2016 Consumer Expenditure Survey, the average American family spends $1573.83 on housing and related expenses every month. Thats more than they spend on food, clothing, healthcare, and entertainment combined! Here at Get Rich Slowly, Im adamant that one of the best ways if not the best way to improve your cash flow is by cutting your costs on housing. Remember, your goal is to manage your financial life as if you were managing a business. If you were looking to balance the budget at a company you owned, you wouldnt do it by trying to trim the small expenses. No, youd tackle your biggest expenses first. If you reduce your labor costs by 5%, for instance, you might be able to save $50,000 per year. But saving 5% on office supplies would probably only save you $50 per year. The same principle applies in your personal life. If the typical American household cut their grocery budget by 5%, theyd save only $200 per year. If they cut housing by 5%? Well, theyd save $900 per year. So why do so many people put so much effort into clipping coupons while continuing to shell out for more home then they can afford (or need)? Good question. In the weeks ahead, Im going to explore different pieces of the housing equation. When does it make sense to rent? When does it make sense to buy? Is it better to prepay your mortgage or to keep it forever? How can you determine how much home you can afford? If you have a specific question about housing and money, please let me know! https://www.getrichslowly.org/homeownership/