#that's probably a good thing
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i'm stuck in a loop of scroll the first 5 or so posts on my tags page, look at my activity page, close the app. I do that once a day. maybe twice. I don't have the brain power to scroll social media anymore lmao
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inflict
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#yuji itadori#nobara kugisaki#fushiguro megumi#itafushikugi#inside me are two wolves one is dead on the floor bc this took ages and the other one is screaming from the rooftops bc i am so PLEASED#im so . im so happy w this im in love w flat markers and chisel brushes im sorry fr ever being frustrated with the harsh angles#opacity down square chisel....layers upon layers of polygons...#i love u so much the effect is a treat to play with#hard shapes thin lines my beloved i think ive struck a good balance between sharp n smooth vs textured render#idec that these kids took probably 12 hours each#worth every minute worth every second#nobara's hair here alone is some of my best work idec#god i love. making things tht make me happy i know how to draw i love when i make smth tht makes me say wow im good @ my hobby
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
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The Mikes and Vanessas celebrate 10 years of FNAF!
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#michael afton#mike schmidt#fnaf vanny#fnaf vanessa#vanessa afton#vanessa shelly#freddy fazbear#fnaf movie#security breach#fnaf anniversary#HAPPY FNAF anniversary week!!!#I WANTED to draw a lil thing in celebration 🎉#I’ll probably draw more things throughout the week in celebration#no doubt I’ll have more to draw after announcements/games drop#SUPER excited !!#SO OBVIOUSLY Michael and Vanessa are very excited for the anniversary#they still like Freddy’s after all#they need any excuse they can get to have a good time#though Mike and Vanny aren’t as enthusiastic you could say#Mike think they probably shouldn’t celebrate at all#seeing they’ve only had bad things happen to em 💀#and Vanny is just not even arguing just straight up nah#I bet they’ll get more into the spirit as the week goes on tho 🩵💜#it’s been awhile since I’ve last drawn all 4 of them together!!#so felt the most fitting for rn they return the crew ever
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Some flowers for you ❤️
#art#flower art#botanical art#digital art#digital watercolor#this was sooo fun#lowkey really like adobe fresco#probably gonna mess around with watercolors some more#feels nice to get a break from the very rigid flat colors even though I love that effect#and it's good practice for Shapes#also finding a place to put my signature was HELL so I just put it next to the flower I spent the most time on lmao#deb this is your fault btw#I have had an Urge to draw flowers for weeks#have I been procrastinating hawkeye's paper cutout thing because the bow is really complicated? yes.
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I’m sure Dumat being defeated the same year andraste was born means nothing
I’m sure this has nothing to do with the fact that andrastes mother was part of a tribe who helped the grey wardens fight and defeat dumat the same year she was born, meaning that she could have been a fetus affected by the taint in the proximity of a dying arch demon
And the fact that nobody knows which grey warden killed dumat, as seven wardens died from injuries from his death throes, and therefore we cannot actually identify a warden who absorbed his soul, means nothing
And I’m sure it is a complete coincidence that andraste had dreams and visions of the being later referred to as the maker her whole life, and behaved strangely, talking about hearing lost voices and seeing strange auras. That absolutely doesn’t sound like anyone else we know
#dragon age#hi I don’t know if these are hot takes anymore or if I’m actually going insane#this could still work with the maker being mythal#(as in the thing that spoke to andraste. claims unverified)#there’s a theory of an 8th old god struck from record#so there’s still enough old gods to account for mythal being dumat#(the 8th old god is associated with sea monsters so that would be Ghilan’nain if that were the case. which is probably one of the ones we#see escaping)#what doesn’t add up is only two escape but there would be three left if this were the case#unless corypheus’ dragon WAS an arch demon and was razikale or Lusacan (which I believe are most likely dirthamen and elgar’nan)#which seem to be the two candidates for the other escaped evanuris#so things could add up#in terms of mythal learning about the tainted fetus stuff she could have done that observing#but it would make sense for her to learn from practice#I’ve been feeling like there’s a huge piece missing in the deal with her and the evanuris because she talks about being denied justice#and like. solas locked up the evanuris for a good few thousand years. it might not be her idea of perfect justice but surely it would be an#attempt#but what if that’s not the betrayal she’s talking about#what if the betrayal is that solas accidentally locked her in there too#dragon age theory#tagging these so I can find them
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So I was looking at the art folder for Chapter 1, and I found an old CG meant for Chapter 1 Deadly Life that never made it in
#fanganronpa#multifandom crossover#drdv#despairverse#this was meant for the art update#i never implemented it#that's probably a good thing
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my hof was born to be a griffon rider, if they could've given him a griffon at the start of dao the blight would've been over in a week
#ailill mahariel#zevran arainai#dragon age#my ocs#my art#they PURR#by the way#in case you didn't know#just one of the many cruel ironies of his life that he would've made a perfect griffon rider and probably would've been much happier#and more enthusiastic abt the whole grey warden thing if he wasn't ~20 years too early for griffons#this is purely self indulgent content lmao it’s been all oc hours all the time lately BUT i made rly good progress on wyll’s reclass#over the weekend and im rly pleased w how it’s going so hoping to finish that soon :)c
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actually i think sony should take their sweet fucking time with beyond the spiderverse cuz even with the time they took with atsv it wasn't enough for the animators to have proper working conditions. like take ten years i don't fucking care, people can bitch and moan but i would rather know the employees aren't working 8hours a day plus overtime for 7 days a fucking week to get a movie about spiderman done cuz "waah waaaah i wanna see it" people won't shut up and sony demands their film be made for the profit of it all
#like cmon guys let's like. be patient and realistic shall we#there are 919295992@5 things to watch read listen to etc in the mean time#i think you can handle it taking a while. it's probably gonna take like. at least 4-5 years#at LEAST#so buckle up!!!#you want something to be good???#you gotta wait#across the spiderverse#spiderman atsv#spiderverse
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sans undertale would not make i fucked your wife jokes. people want to make jokes about sans fucking asgore's wife but sans the character would NOT do that r you kidding me. you can cut the secondhand embarrassment with a knife every time they're in the same room together, sans likes the guy, i bet he feels genuinely kinda bad for asgore. he'd be like sorry about the dating your ex wife thing. to be fair she's a really cool ex wife. and asgore would be like (rescue shelter dog sigh) She is.
#i do think he would keep things polite but distant in the early days post pacifist because tori doesn't want anything to do with him#but after some time passes and they became tentative friends he probably like. asks him to manage the grill at the cookout together#gifts him a HUGE sized pair of socks right back for that other time#cracks some jokes. like they seemed to be on pretty good terms in the game#undertale#sans#asgore#soriel
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yuuji smiling and sukuna making a face like That did u really think i wouldn't do a panel redraw
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#ryoumen sukuna#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#jjk 264#yuuji#sukuna#god sukuna's face is so priceless he rly does look like a cat at the vet#AND I MISSED HAPPY YUUJI i would read a compilation of every panel of smiling yuuji in a heartbeat#i also missed pink sukuna :') no context n u can almost pretend we r back in the good old days#anyway i debated adding text 2 this because to me it looks like Let's Take Ibuprofen Together#and since thats Sukuna's Thing (tm) i feel like theres a joke 2 b made there with yuuji saying it 2 him#but i decided against it smtimes simple is best#ok my hand is actually showing signs of overuse im done fr the day i PROMIS E FHFJSFJJ#it's just the meat of the palm pinky side and not the wrist so thats a good sign#ill probably b better tmr . no rest fr the wicked stay strong girl
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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"
like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.
"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."
... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.
and i'd still keep writing.
i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.
i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley
"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"
and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.
it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.
you create because you're greedy.
#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME#there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing#and the writing is what i need to be doing#writeblr#this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to#edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol#i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!!#my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means#i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her)#hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong#i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet.#i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse#i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!!#i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO#i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness#and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it#im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us#i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer#and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art.#i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work#even if it means being miserable#but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.
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Related to my previous post: it's amazing how the setting of Muir's novels contrasts with the depth of character writing focused on queer WOC. Bc it doesn't matter how woke and diverse John Gaius' Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Catholicism is from the audience's first glance at the dramatis personæ, the Nine Houses are still a fascist theocracy cracking liveable planets like walnuts & making sure not a single denizen of the colonies has a moment of peace, and it was built by a man who grew up in the 21st century and whose female (citation needed) partner he killed, ate & put in the fridge. Women are still assigned value by their physical appearance (like the twins), their treatment still hinges on their gender expression (compare treatments of Gideon's body vs Harrow's), they still aren't taken seriously at work (like Mercy), interclass marriage (necrocav couple Abigail & Magnus) is scorned, reproductive rights and healthcare in general are abysmal (Fourth, Sixth, Seventh, Ninth for different reasons). "Does the narrative respect women" and "Do the characters in the story respect women" are two completely different questions with sometimes completely different answers
#probably not saying anything original here#good thing that being trite is not a crime#the locked tomb#tamsyn muir#tlt meta#literature#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#nona the ninth
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ENG PLAYERS I BESEECH YOU
I have been informed that you guys are getting part 4 of episode 7 tomorrow, which means we are FINALLY going to get the official romanization of Revaan's name, somebody please tell me because I need to know what it is.
like, yes, it's probably just Revan/Levan, but look, I'm sitting here with my finger over the button of all these Laverne and Shirley jokes and just waiting for the opportunity to deploy them --
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 5 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 5 spoilers#(not me realizing that meleanor doesn't actually appear non-silhouetted until part 5 so uhhhhh. whoops.)#(i know a bunch of you read the spoiler-tagged stuff though so i'm putting my life in your hands)#revan would be the funniest one i think because it's just raven but with the vowels switched and i'd be over here going WHAT COULD IT MEAN#anyway i'm here to give the people what they crave and it's obviously references to 70s american sitcoms that spun off of happy days#mork and grimdy. i-is that anything.#the problem of course is now that i might have to actually come up with a bunch of laverne and shirley jokes#when i haven't...actually watched it in a million years#(my personal pool of media i consumed growing up is a good 60% made up of random things i found to watch at 3 am because of insomnia)#(this probably explains a lot about me) (the opinions about zorro adaptations anyway)#hold on let me marathon all eight seasons and -- wait i'm just now finding out there was also an animated series#in which they joined the army and their sergeant was a literal cartoon pig but also they went to space and fought giant gorillas?#but how does boo boo kitty factor into this
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y’know, there are times were I see a post on tumblr and i realize that i am absolutely not a part of the majority of tumblrites.
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his handprint may be burned into your skin but it's still the gentlest touch you've ever received.
#smth smth destiel#cas was always so gentle with dean#he knew of dean's pain and wanted to ease it!!#he wanted to be a good thing in dean's life!!#when he pulled him from hell it wasn't truly pulling#he cradled dean like he was the most precious thing in the world#and honestly he probably WAS the most precious thing in the world to cas#even as early as then#to quote 'when castiel first laid a hand on you in hell he was lost'#god they make me insane#dean winchester#castiel#destiel#supernatural#does this count as fanfic even if it's one sentence#a poem perhaps#idk it's something that i wrote so i'll take it
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