#that's because he's the ultimate cool introvert icon

[cherrygoesiconic]

❛❛can I offer you a Yamada™ in these trying times?❜❜ (っ＾▿＾)

[justthatwwegirl]

(Idk, I'm always making imagines inspired by Laufey songs)

From The Start

(Grayson Waller x Female Reader)

Summary: Y/N finally tells Grayson about her feelings for him and it goes in a way she didn't expect.

(Warnings: Shitty summary and kinda rushed ending, two idiots in love, some cursing, Liv and Austin being icons.)

Y/N sat on one of the crates, opening her water bottle as she had just finished her match.

Her and Dakota faced against eachother, Y/N coming out on top.

Just right as she was still drinking her water, there came the face she had wanted to see, the person who made her smile and blush till she felt like a high school girl with a crush.

"Y/N/N! Congrats on your match." Grayson had said, walking up to her with some food from catering and a vending machine before giving her a hug that she returned back.

"Thank you." Y/N said quietly. She ate the food very eagerly due to her hunger. Not eating before the show or during.

Her and Grayson had been good friends since their NXT days, Y/N falling for the Australian ever since they met and falling even more in love every day after.

The two had grown very close and cared for each other dearly.

Grayson was more outgoing and very much an extrovert. Y/N liked to keep to herself, didn't like going out and was more of an introvert.

"Hey, do you wanna order takeout when we get back to the hotel?" Grayson asked in his Australian accent, making Y/N go weak.

"Um, sure why not." Y/N said, keeping a cool composure.

Grayson smiled at her, making Y/N smiled back automatically, blushing just a little (or a lot).

Grayson had sat next to her, leaning to rest his head on her shoulder.

Y/N smiled and then leaned her head on his.

Just very friendly things...

"I like your gear." Y/N said making Grayson look down at his gear with a smile.

"T-thank you!" Grayson said in a stuttering mess, making Y/N concerned.

"You okay, Gray?" Y/N asked, using his nickname.

Before Grayson could answer, a familiar voice interrupted.

"Y/N!" Liv had said giving Y/N a big hug that Y/N returned.

"I saw your match and you did absolutely amazing!" Liv said making Y/N jump off the crate and slightly nod.

Liv looked at Grayson and at Y/N before holding her hands up. "Looks like I interrupted some time between you and your boyfriend, sorry!" Liv apologized making Y/N rub her face and making Grayson start smiling.

"I'll see you later, Grayson." Y/N said, looking like a red tomato and waved bye.

Grayson frowned a little but ultimately said bye as well.

"Okay, I didn't even do anything wrong, I said the truth." Liv said and Y/N crossed her arms.

"We're not dating! And as much as I would like that, you know he doesn't feel the same way." Y/N said and Liv looked at her confused.

"Y/N, you can't be serious right now." Liv said and Y/N shrugged her shoulders.

"I am. He doesn't like me back and that's fine. I don't wanna ruin years worth of friendship just because I have a crush on him." Y/N said with a frown.

"Girl. You do realize he feels the same right?" Liv asked, making Y/N shake her head.

"I can give you multiple reasons on why I think so!" Liv said before going on a rant making Y/N listen.

Even though Y/N acted like she wasn't interested. Deep deep down, she hoped Liv's reason were true.

"I hope you know that you talk about this man NONSTOP. Pretty much half of our messages is you talking about how much you love him and want him. Well, I'm here to tell you why you should shoot your shot BECAUSE HE LIKES YOU BACK!" Liv said in a frustrated tone making Y/N jump just a little.

"1, when me and Naomi are on the topic of you guys," "Wait you guys talk about us?" "Not important, anyways." Liv continues. "We both notice how much he listens to you when you talk. Not like how a normal guy listens like this man is INVESTED and he always looks at you with those fucking heart eyes." Liv says making Y/N confused.

"Number 2, who got you matching bracelets for your birthday, AND took you to the mall to go on a shopping spree, not minding how much money you spent?" Liv asked making Y/N look down.

"Gray." Y/N whispered. Liv smiled a she proved even more of her point.

"And who gave you matching bracelets in NXT which you are still wearing today?" Liv asked another question making Y/N scoff.

"Gray." Y/N answered once again, showing her wrist that showed the bracelet.

"You can stop this rant-" "I am not done until you say you will tell him." Liv stated making Y/N groan.

"He gets you food almost every day, he literally carried you everywhere when you injured your leg even though you had crunches, even Triple H thought you guys were dating, and then, this man lets you hold his man just because you're nervous-" "Fine, fine! I'll tell him." Y/N said in defeat making Liv jump and down in excitement.

"Yes! Oh my gosh, FINALLY!" Liv says jumping and down, clapping her hands.

"Alright, Liv, chill." Y/N says while Liv takes some breathes before finally calming down.

"It's that obvious?" Y/N asks, looking at Liv.

"Yes. It is that obvious. He even talks to Austin so much about you to the point where Austin calls you Grayson's girlfriend." Liv says making Y/N blush a little and smile.

"And according to Austin, Grayson doesn't correct him." Y/N looks up at Liv.

"Gosh, if you keep telling me this, I'll die of being too flustered." Y/N said before covering her face as she was blushing and smiling too hard.

"When you're not around, the man complains to Austin 24/7 about how much he missed you."

"STOP-"

-

"You still have that?" Y/N pointed to the little wristband that she made for Grayson years ago.

"Yeah, I wear it everyday and pretty much everywhere." Grayson said, holding the door open for Y/N as they walked into the hotel.

"You didn't notice?" Grayson asked making Y/N shake her head.

"No, I thought you had lost it." Y/N said as they got to the counter, booking their room.

"Imagine if they give us the honeymoon room again." Grayson says, making Y/N let out a laugh.

"That was something." Y/N said, shaking her head in a smile as they went toward the elevator.

They entered the elevator, continuing their conversation.

She always made eye contact with him during conversations even though it made her super nervous. But she loved the way they looked and always smiled at least once during every conversation they had.

She always took his features into deep thought.

Just as they were talking, Y/N had remembered what she promised Liv and immediately groaned, rubbing her face.

"Y/N/N, you okay?" Grayson asked, putting his hand on her shoulder make her relax.

"Um yeah, but I kind of wanted to talk to you about something." Y/N said, facing her fears.

"What is it-" A loud sound had interrupted him, making Y/N and Grayson.

"What just happened?!" Y/N asked in a loud tone, looking around.

"Did the elevator get stuck?!" Grayson asked, also looking around.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now." Y/N said stressed, making her grab Grayson's hand.

Grayson held her hand, squeezing it and making them look at each other.

"It's going to be okay, they'll fix it." Grayson said, trying to calm her down even though he was terrible at it.

"You're right." Y/N said before taking some deep breathes but never letting go of his hand.

The two stood in silence. Still holding one another's hand.

Until Grayson broke the silence.

"What were you going to tell me?" He asked, squeezing her hand again as she looked at him.

"I'm going to try and tell you in the best way I can but you make me super nervous and I just-" Y/N paused.

"I just what?" Grayson asked quietly.

"I like you, more than a friend should." Y/N quickly blurted out.

"I've liked you from the start and the feeling has gotten stronger ever since and I understand if you don't feel the same or if you just wanna be friends I'm really sorry-" While Y/N rushed, before she could finish, she felt those soft lips she had always wanted to kiss against hers.

Y/N kissed him back immediately. Not wanting the moment to end ever.

Until Grayson had to pull away.

"Well, if that doesn't tell you that I feel the same way, I don't know what will." Grayson said in his accent that kept making her go weak.

"I'm still a little... shocked that you feel the same, didn't even realize." Y/N said.

"I thought I was being obvious, I kept dropping hints!" Grayson said making Y/N scrunch her eyebrows in confusion.

"I talk about you so much where Austin has to deal with it everyday. He calls you my girlfriend cause I always talk about you!" Grayson said.

'Well, Liv did tell me that.' Y/N thought.

"Everytime we were away, I always fell asleep on the phone with you and every time I see you, I feel like eyes turn into hearts." Grayson continues making Y/N blush.

"I tried giving you hints but I was too damn awkward." Y/N defended herself.

"You know how shy I am, Gray" Y/N says making Grayson smile and nod.

"I do, and every single time you opened up to me or revealed something about yourself, it gave me more reasons on why I love you." Y/N blushed even more at his statement before giving him a look.

"How long have you felt this way?" Y/N asked him.

"Since we met-" "I could have told you this whole time?!" Y/N shouted.

Grayson laughed and nodded before hugging Y/N.

She hugged back and looked up at him. He looked down at her with their eyes locking and leaned in.

He kissed her with such passion that it made her melt as she kissed him back.

She held onto him as the two continued to kiss but both of them didn't hear anything as they felt like they were in a different world when with one another.

And especially didn't hear the elevator door opening.

"OH MY GOSH!" Liv shouted, making Grayson and Y/N pull away, looking to see Liv and Austin standing next to each other.

"YOU OWE ME 50 BUCKS THEORY!" Liv shouted once again and Austin groaned.

"You guys couldn't have waited one more week?" Austin asked as he pulled a 50 dollar bill from his wallet, giving it to Liv as she danced in a celebration.

"I mean if it wasn't for Liv, I still would be dreaming my fantasies with him away." Y/N said making Grayson start blushing.

Grayson and Y/N stepped out of the elevator while Liv and Austin got in. Everyone said goodbye to eachother while the elevator closed and once again, Y/N and Grayson were alone again.

"Does this make us a couple?" Grayson asked and Y/N nodded her head.

"I hope so. I want to be your girlfriend." Y/N said with another smile as she kissed Grayson again.

"And I want to be your boyfriend." Grayson said, kissing her back while she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Then, we're together, Gray." She whispered and leaned in for another kiss which Grayson immediately obliged too.

The End ♡

[pommpuriinn]

◎`🪴` ❥﹒🍡﹒ılıl﹑ HALMYUNGSOO EP. 152

joohyung’s cute and silly moments during tubatu’s return to halmyungsoo

outfit | makeup | hair | nails

✬ as everyone was talking with Myungsoo, Joohyung stood on the far left along side Soobin just listening to everyone. The camera zoomed in and they captioned ‘the two introverts’

✬ “I almost didn’t realize you Joohyung-ssi.” Myungsoo looked over at Joohyung. “Ah because of my hair and piercings, huh?” Joohyung smiled at Myungsoo, as she fixed her oversized old leather jacket. “You look so cool!” Myungsoo complimented. “She does! Doesn’t she.” Taehyun said while the members nod in agreement.

✬ “should to play rock, paper, scissors to see who gets Joohyung?” Yeonjun asked. The staff agreed and both teams sent one person on the left side they sent Beomgyu, while on the right Yeonjun volunteered himself. Ultimately Beomgyu ended up winning on the first try. “Haha, no one takes my Jooie away.” He teased Yeonjun before Yeonjun held his fist up, and sent Beomgyu running away to his team’s side. “It’s settled Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun, and Joohyung against Yeonjun, Kai, Myungsoo.”

✬the game they were going to play was one of Joohyung’s favorite to watch since is guess the lyrics and then they get to dance to the song.

✬ hearing Jungkook’s song Joohyung almost gave the answer away, but luckily Soobin quickly covered her mouth as Taehyun ran to the mic stand. “Joohyung come on!” Taehyun quickly pulled Joohyung out of her chair and she immediately started dancing with Taehyun.

✬once Kai got the right lyrics to smoke everyone got out of their chair and starting dancing to Bada’s choreo. Finally jellies/moas got to see Joohyung do some of the choreo before the camera panned to Kai.

✬ ‘Super Shy’ started playing and Joohyung watched Beomgyu run to the mic stand. “You better get it right dummy!” Joohyung teased him. Beomgyu started singing and doing his cute dance, but of course he forgot one word. “Soobin go save him.” Joohyung gently pushed Soobin off his chair to save the day.

✬as Yeonjun and Beomgyu did their version of twerking to a Jay Park song Joohyung started throwing fake money at him making the staff crack up

✬the staff started playing older songs Joohyung really didn’t have a clue since she doesn’t remember nor listen to older kpop songs, so she really just sat back and watched all the chaos happen.

✬ the second Joohyung heard ‘That That’ she knew Yeonjun was going to go off. Instead of sitting there and watching them she decided to join all of them and fully dance to the song

✬ hearing the Kara song Joohyung knew she had to get the point not only for her team, but for her Soobin pookie. “Move!” She pushed Kai sending him almost to the ground. Joohyung finished the lyrics without a problem, “this one is for you.” She pointed at Soobin before she started dancing. Everyone cheered before they started doing the iconic butt dance.

✬ “this time I won’t push you so let’s do it together.” Joohyung told Kai, as they were the only ones going to the mic. “Ok~” they held each other’s hands skipping to the mic stand. The two ended up singing together earning both teams a point. “Let’s go!” Joohyung hyped them up as they started dancing to ‘Loser Lover’

✬ “Joohyung-ssi is getting out of her shell.” Myungsoo pointed at her. “It’s takes me time to come out.” Joohyung chuckled.

✬ “ok this one is our last one and it goes for two points of you do the choreo.” The staff announced. “It must be a hard one.” Kai said, getting ready. ‘Oh wiheomhan jangnaneul chyeo maehokjeogijiman neol Bujeonghal bakke’ was heard. Joohyung gasped and started running along with all the other members also wanting to get the mic. Poor Myungsoo was so confused and was left behind still thinking about the song. Joohyung snatched the mic from everyone and started singing, “modeun geol samkyeobeoril Black Mamba!” The staff yelled ‘correct!’ and everyone gave Joohyung some room and once the drop came Joohyung did her iconic ‘Black Mamba’ dance. “That’s our noona!” Kai cheered.

✬ “stop moving so much!” Joohyung tried to speak with the straw in her mouth and holding Beomgyu’s head. “You can’t use hands!” Yeonjun yelled, pointing at the two. Joohyung wanted to laugh so she quickly moved the cup off her straw. Joohyung playfully lifted her fist up at Yeonjun to threaten him making him laugh.

✬ next was the game ‘roll the kimbap’ “games like this cause me stress.” Joohyung sighed, knowing how fast the members get so into the game. Immediately the camera zoomed in on Joohyung’s stress faced after Myungsoo got kicked out. After someone suggested on going faster Joohyung let out a panic scream because of how fast they were going. “Ya! You’re out!” They kicked Beomgyu out of the line. “Oh my god, I never gotten this far before.” Joohyung was surprised. “You got this noona~” Kai who was unfortunately out gave a few words of encouragement.

✬ it wasn’t long before Soobin messed up and it was only three left. Joohyung gasped, “am I really in the final three?” Joohyung really felt like a winner already. That feeling didn’t last long because Taehyun and Yeonjun were going to fast and Yeonjun was yelling in her face. “Ya! Stop yelling!” Joohyung gave up. “I was loosing my train of thought.” Joohyung whined making everyone laugh. Beomgyu hugged his pouty face girlfriend trying to make her feel better. “You did good Jooie~”

✬ Yeonjun ended up loosing to Taehyun which got his team the bad kimbap with wasabi. “Here have some of mine.” Joohyung was kind enough to each give Yeonjun and Kai two pieces each of hers.

✬ “I had fun watching everyone and I felt even more comfortable, so thank you so much for having us come on your show let’s meet again. Our new full album the name chapter: freefall is out after two and half years of waiting so please give it lots of love and support. Thank you again~” Joohyung closed them out.

[introvertguide]

15 Badass Movies for a Fun Time at Home or with Friends

There is a buzz in the air as COVID-19 vaccines are rolling out and the hope of having a movie night with friends is again becoming a reality. Watching alone isn’t as fun because I want to talk to somebody about what I have just seen. A full theater does not agree with my introvert nature because somebody screaming or laughing or talking on their phone will ruin it for me. Watching with a fellow cinephile or two is perfect. But what to watch first? People have been stuck inside, so fantasy and alternative worlds have been overly popular. All I do is talk over zoom for a living. I think what I need most right now is a movie about realistic people with realistic skills that go into a situation and just wreck house. I need a badass movie. What is this “badass” movie you might say? Well, here are some basic criteria: 1) There must be a tough lead character who kicks butt while spouting one liners and doesn’t need superhuman powers (high levels of peak skill with speed, aim, or strength is OK if they are plausible in the real world), 2) most of the characters (good and bad) must be likable, admirable or at least memorable, 3) the lead must face and defeat overwhelming odds against them, and 4) extra points for memorable one liners. Also, I am only dealing with human protagonists (sorry Terminator), but slightly superhuman opposition is acceptable. This list is by no means exhaustive, it is just an example of some badass movies. So in no particular order:

1) Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

To start off the list, I want to mention the most well known American badass. Indiana Jones is a smart guy with a gun and a whip. He is rugged and punches guys in the face. He has weaknesses but works through them to get the job done. Harrison Ford was in his early 40s for this role and had this tough-as-nails and seen the world kind of feel while still being young enough to fight hand to hand. Any of the first three films featuring Indiana Jones would work here, but this is the original and it started the fun. Easy to watch. Easy to cheer for. Great movie. You can’t really go wrong with any age or group with this one. 

2) 13 Assassins (2010)

This movie is extremely badass but not for everyone. This is one of the goriest films I have ever seen as 13 warriors kill off a couple of hundred soldiers and the evil leader that they guard. The movie was directed by Japanese extreme horror icon Takashi Miike if that means anything to you (hey made Audition and Ichi the Killer). The movie has gallons of blood, but also an amazing story of redemption and honor. There are tons of scenes of a single warrior taking on dozens of soldiers and managing to overcome. Not for everyone, but still very much a badass movie.

3) The Raid (2011)

This is an Indonesian action thriller with the word action in bold. The film is directed by Gareth Evans and stars Iko Uwais as part of a small police force that tries to take down an old building that houses a drug lord and his violent gang. It has a lot of what I like in badass movies: one-on-one fights between the lead and almost superhuman villains, long well-choreographed scenes, a banging soundtrack, ridiculous weapons, and ridiculous gore. The fight scenes in tight places and the use of the environment for weaponry is amazing and the sound design makes sure you can feel every punch. The lead character should have no chance, but he makes up for it with skill and being a pure badass. This movie is one of the few that I would describe as having non-stop action.

4) Jon Wick (2014)

When did Keanu Reeves become so cool? I grew up with him being part of the Bill and Ted duo. He decides to learn martial arts and play a god-like being in the Matrix movies and then becomes a one man wrecking crew? I guess he is a badass because he does it so well. Keanu plays a retired hitman who is wronged and decides to go back to work for vengeance. He just won’t stop coming and seems to constantly survive out of pure hatred alone. There are 3 films in the series and any one of them will impress. Pure fun too watch.

5) Casino Royale (2006)

When I was asking around, there were many people who thought that James Bond was the ultimate badass. I disagree in that many of the older films show Bond as overconfident with the assistance of many people. In fact, Q is more of a badass in many ways than James Bond. However, when the series was taken back to its roots with the last book that had not been made into a serious film and made darker, it reached badass levels. From the parkour chase to a poisoning to an extreme torture scene, this was not like any James Bond movie before it. Roger Craig plays a much colder lead who gives no quarter, much more like what the greatest secret agent would have to be. Heavy on violence but light on gore, this film is more for all audiences than other films on this list.

6) Desperado (1995)

What makes this movie is not all about Antonio Banderas and Selma Hayek. It is that every other character is memorable and badass as well. The street standoff with Bucho’s men versus El Mariachi, Quino, and Campo is iconic. El Mariachi murders everyone in a bar with precise skill. The rogue assassin Navajas with all the knives played by Danny Trejo. Nothing but extreme shoot outs and fight scenes with a ridiculous variety of guns and explosives. I think what makes this movie so amazing is that all these amazing assassins are incognito and, when they suddenly produce an arsenal out of nowhere, it is always a pleasant surprise. Quino and Campo are amazing when they bring their guitars. 

7) Pulp Fiction (1994)

Truly the role that made Samuel L. Jackson into the ultimate badass. He and his partner Vincent are hitman that keep running into the worst situations. The thing about the film is that everybody is so cool. The characters are cool, the music is cool, the dialogue is cool, hell even the diner featured in the movie is cool. The movie only spans a couple of days (in completely separate segments shown out of order) but packs in 7 distinct situations that are all berserk. From the mind of Quentin Tarantino, this movie is dripping with the best characters traveling through the best story. Highly recommend.

8) Leon: The Professional (1994)

Also known simply as The Professional in the U.S., this film features the debut of Natalie Portman. It is directed by Luc Besson at his best period, right between La Femme Nakita and The Fifth Element. The lead is actually a quiet hitman who reluctantly takes a little 12-year-old girl on as an apprentice to become a paid assassin. Her parents were killed by a corrupt cop and she wants Leon to help her exact revenge. He is an absolute badass and somewhat of a caring surrogate father to the girl. Unlike a lot of the films on this list, the premise is not simply kicking butt in a bad situation. There is serious character growth. Apparently you can be a caring parent and a cold-blooded murderer...and that is badass.

9) Kill Bill (2003)

Being a badass is not exclusive to men and The Bride is a prime example of this. She survives a shot to the head, kills deadly assassins, slaughters a gang, and takes on a crazy school girl bodyguard. She is tougher then any lead I can think of and she has the bad attitude and sense of vengeance that makes for a badass. Combine this with the soundtrack and beautiful cinematography associated with director Quentin Tarantino and you have a beautifully violent movie in which the hits keep coming. Even on this list, the fight scene between the bride and Gogo Yubari is insane. Also note the nod to Bruce Lee with the bright yellow motorcycle suit. Beautifully badass film.

10) Aliens (1986)

In nature, there are few things more dangerous than a mother protecting their young. A mother will fight you to the death and make sure that, at the very least, you won’t be able to go after her kids. Now imagine an alien planet covered with hostile beings created in the mind of James Cameron and Stan Winston and you have a setting made to create a real badass. In the beginning, Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) is just desperate to survive and barely knows how to use a weapon. She meets a little survivor named Newt and then has a real reason to become aggressive. She and a group of marines fight through a station filled with super destructive xenomorph aliens made straight from nightmares to save this kid. The transformation is truly amazing and culminates in a mech suit versus a giant queen alien and it is extremely badass.

11) Army of Darkness (1992)

Far and away the funniest movie on this list, this is the third film stemming from Evil Dead and again stars Bruce Campbell taking on the deadites that were raised by reading from the Necronomicon. The opposition is the undead evil that faces the world which makes the violence very unrealistic. This was early work from Sam Raimi and features a variety of different shots done to the extreme. What really makes this film stand out is how Bruce Campbell is amazing at delivering a one liner. His classic quips have been used as fun Easter eggs in video games like Duke Nukem and World of Warcraft for decades. The quintessential horror comedy and a perfect example of a badass.

12) Die Hard (1988)

Apparently, I am a big fan of single characters that need to work their way through a building of villains using mostly intelligence and the element of surprise. Throw in some one liners and I am all for it. That is exactly what this is with Bruce Willis crawling barefoot around a 40 story building and fighting off a gang of villains. The movie also has Alan Rickman as the main bad guy and he is chewing the scenery. This is a great example of being a badass, but it is too bad that the follow up sequels were so poor. Definitely stick to the original and let the rest pass by.

13) The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly (1966)

An OG of the badass movie genre, this is some of the best of Sergio Leone and the spaghetti western. Instead of one badass, this movie has three different leads that are all amazing. You have the good, Clint Eastwood, who is an amazing shot and a heart of gold under a rough exterior. You have the bad, Lee Van Cleef, playing an conniving assassin that will kill anyone that he doesn’t have a use for. Finally, you have the ugly, Eli Wallach, as a desert rat that will do anything to survive. They all gain information about a gold stash and need to work together to get it, but this creates a vortex of cheating, undercutting, and straight up murder. Clint Eastwood is more of the classic badass with his cigar, hat, and poncho, It is an iconic look on an iconic character in an iconic movie. That is what I call badass.

14) Ong-Bak (2003)

This less of a badass movie and more houses some of the most amazingly badass fight scenes that can only be described as badass. This movie introduced the great Tony Jaa to the western world and showed the high flying nature of Thai boxing and Muay Thai in general. The main character is entered into a street fighting tournament and the moves include a flying double knee drop and a full splits kick. If the whole movie was the tournament, it would be the best movie that ever existed. The variety of opponents makes the fighting even better and the cinematography is top notch. Tony Jaa is truly badass in this film.

15) Dredd (2012)

Not the crappy version with Stallone, this movie is seriously badass. It features Karl Urban who is helmeted for the entire film (as Dredd would be) taking on a 200 story mega slum filled with residents that want to shoot him dead. There is a drug dealer high up in the building and she locks down the entire compound with instructions to kill Dredd, who only has his rookie partner to help. He takes on random resident mobs, groups of gang members, and even a trio of mini guns that have bullets that can rip through walls. He has a smart gun with a bunch of ammo that he uses judiciously to kill everybody. This movie was seriously underrated since it had not been that long since the garbage Judge Dredd came out in 1995. The 2012 is a far superior movie, being much more violent and dark instead of having Rob Schneider as the comedy relief (not badass).

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know there will be a lot of opinions about what makes a badass film and what movies i didn’t add. Feel free to add your own movies or critique my choices. I will stand by my choices, however, and recommend any of these films for a night of cheers and badass action.

[stars-self-ships]

Lucida for the F/O(s) that you find yourself thinking of the most!

stephysalcido requested Lucida!

Lucida (n.) The brightest star in a constellation. What makes your f/o special to you? What about them makes them shine brighter than everyone else?

Ooh, this is a fun one! As I'm sure you can imagine, I hold every single one of my F/Os very close to my heart, and the reasons behind each specific one can very immensely. Now, I could go by Stephanie's suggestion and list the reasons why the F/Os I find myself thinking of the most are special to me...

... but then this post would exceed twenty paragraphs. And that's if I stick to one paragraph per F/O, which definitely wouldn't be the case, especially for some of the more special ones.

So, instead of making this post leagues longer than it probably should be, I've come up with a fun approach in answering this ask: I'll be choosing one (?) F/O from each F/O category (I.E. romantic, platonic and familial) and explaining why each one is special to me! Let's get started, shall we? 💙🤍💙

I think it goes without saying that the romantic F/O that means the most to me would more than likely be Clairen— after all, she is my self-ship blog's icon, so of course I hold her in high regard! Clairen sticks out to me in particular for a variety of reasons, too: when it comes to her Lovers of Aether counterpart, you don't have to look far for proof that she's such a kind and considerate character.

Clairen and I share a lot of traits (Being socially awkward perhaps being the biggest one), and between her playful flirting at one point after class to her calling me cute after successfully unlocking her ending, it's no wonder I fell for her as hard as I did.

Then for her Rivals of Aether counterpart, what sticks out to me the most about her appearance in that continuity is her unending selflessness and bravery. Multiple times all throughout Tales of Aether: Future Imperfect, she is seen putting others before herself, and that's not even getting into how breathtaking she looks. I know for a fact that she would go out of her way to protect me from any harm, and there really isn't a better thought than thinking about being held snugly in Clairen's arms, or holding her in my own... 🖤❤️🖤

In terms of platonic F/Os, I think it boils down to a tie between two regarding which one I think about the most, and those two platonic F/Os are Maypul and Elliana. While I can't remember which, I'm more than certain that either one of them were the first of my many platonic F/Os, and it's actually kind of humorous how different both of them are... at first, that is.

Maypul and Elliana, regarding their personalities, are complete polar opposites. Maypul is very outgoing, wildly optimistic, and is more than caring about those that are close to her. Meanwhile, Elliana is better described as the introvert to Maypul's extrovert, and is personified in Lovers of Aether as an irritable and misunderstood individual that prefers solitude over being in the midst of others she thinks are better than her.

But it should come as no surprise that both Maypul and Elliana are two of my kindest platonic F/Os. I've always seen Elliana as the type of F/O to be a bit discrete about showing any form of affection, but looking past her testy exterior, she holds those who do care about her close to heart, and I am absolutely one of them. With that, I'm sure it's easy to see why I'd think Maypul is the same way, just a lot less reserved in showing her love— just look at her! She's all smiles!

My case in point for why I chose Maypul and Elliana for the platonic F/Os that are the most special to me, though, is this: they stand out from the rest because one is always willing to shower me with affection and validation with open arms, and the other has been a favorite character in the Rivals franchise for me since the very start. Maypul and Elliana are very dear to me.

And lastly, as for which familial F/O is the most special to me... it's another tie! This time, it's between Zetterburn and Claiyen, my older brother and mom respectively. I was REALLY close in giving the 'most special familial F/O' distinction to all seven of my familial F/Os, but more on that in the tags.

I've mentioned this in a post or two beforehand, but I ADORE older sibling F/Os— which might be the reason I have so many— because with them, you can always rest easy in knowing they are there to support you, listen to you, and protect you. And while all of my older sibling F/Os fit that bill, Zetterburn is the most special to me because he didn't even start as a familial F/O.

For a little while, I had Zetterburn listed as a platonic F/O. This was because, at the time, I saw him as more of a 'cool best friend' type of figure... though the more I thought about him, the more I realized just how much I love and look up to him. It's because of that reason (Coupled with the fact that he's SUPER supportive of the player in-universe in Lovers of Aether) that I eventually decided to coin him as my older brother, and eventually his brother, Forsburn. I truly could not be happier knowing that I have the coolest older brother ever.

Claiyen, too, makes me really happy. Up until very recently (Around the time Tales of Aether: Future Imperfect's first issue released), I've since developed a fondness for parental F/Os for the same reasons why I'm so fond of older sibling F/Os, though taken up to eleven. I at first was really nervous in coming out in admitting that I saw Claiyen as my mom (Which was the reason why for a while I had her listed as my 'mother in a found family sense'), but the more she began to show up throughout Tales of Aether and with Stephanie's reassurance, I had the confidence to show my love for Claiyen in due course.

Claiyen is, like, the ultimate mom F/O. She's notably wise, gives impeccable advice, and if the one panel in Future Imperfect where she's hugging Clairen is any indication, is exceedingly softhearted toward her family, and I feel as though she would be just the same with me. Whenever I'm not at my best, I'll sometimes think about being in her care, her gentle fingers running through my hair as she whispers to me that everything is going to be okay, and that thought never fails to lift my mood. I love Claiyen so much... she is just the perfect mom.

... well. This post ended up being a lot longer than I expected it to be, which I whole-heartedly apologize for. I guess that's just a clear indication of how special my F/Os are to me, whether I accounted them in this post or not! 💙🤍💙

[heyitsbugette]

Todobug AU - Headcanons (2)

Pairings:

1.    Marinette Dupain-Cheng / Ladybug x Todoroki Shoto.

2.    Adrien Agreste / Chat Noir x Luka Couffaine/ Viperion

3.    Kagami Tsurugi/Ryuko x Bakugo Katsuki

Masterlist:

Part 1

✦ During his stay in Japan, Chat Noir was the first to jump to become friends with everyone there, so it was not strange for anyone when he took the time to meet Shoto, and surprisingly both immediately connected by having in common the bad relationship with their fathers. Of course, they understand each other perfectly.

✦ Eventually Viperion decided to adopt him symbolically, as with his empathetic and mature personality he managed to become close to him. To such an extent that when he was questioned about his father assuming he would talk about Endeavor, he just raised an eyebrow and shamelessly replied: “Yeah, Viper's a pretty cool hero.” Of course, his response becomes iconic.

✦ But not surprisingly, both Shoto and Ladybug didn't connect at the beginning. To be honest, the french gal didn't know how to deal with someone so serious, she always had been surrounded by people with bubbly personalities in both inside and outside her heroic alter-ego. He instead seemed at times somewhat introverted, someone who, although not aggressive like Kagami, still kept his distance. Shoto didn't see the charm in bonding with someone who was going to leave anyway.

✦ However, they were cordial. It was not until seeing them train Ladybug paid attention to the details of each student along side with the snake hero, both commenting on certain patterns that they noticed in their fights, Ryuko instead did not join the pleasant discussion because as he was always arguing heatedly with Katsuki for some triviality. But those who caught her attention mainly were Momo Yoyorozu and Todoroki Shoto.

✦ In fact, although Adrien used to be very jealous of anyone who dared to gain Ladybug's affection during his past infatuation with her, it was in fact him who introduced his new friend and his lady as soon as he had noticed that she felt a certain interest into speaking to him. He knew that if anyone could soften Shoto it would be Marinette, even his cousin Félix did.

✦ Marinette thought that Momo Yaoyorozu would be the perfect replacement if something were to happen to her to make her unable to fight. She wouldn't hesitate to comment on her idea to Tikki, just to find out her opinion of someone else wielding her. And naturally discuss the idea with the girl just in case of she was willing to.

✦ Endeavor's son on the other hand demonstrated certain techniques that caught her curiosity, and when she came to let him know it was a tremendous shock to him that she asked for his advice. Why would a professional heroine ask for help with her attack techniques?

✦ Soon he would know that each member of Team Miraculous is chosen according to their specialties. Ladybug and Viperion were strategic, intellectual. Ryuko and Chat Noir were the best in terms of strength and lethality. Yes, Ladybug was a great heroine, but she still needed to polish her skills. So they decide to start training together, learning some things from each other, an action that does not go unnoticed by the gossip of the student body.

✦ It was kinda obvious they were having too much fun in Japan. Kagami missed her country, Adrien fell in love with the culture beyond his fanaticism for anime and manga, Marinette was inspired by Japanese fashion and had decided to prepare to create her own inspired line with some native models. Luka was more neutral, not a big fan of big cities, but he found rural areas pleasant to hang out for inspiration.

✦ Adrien would soon discover that Bakugo has talent as a model, it is a pity that they cannot hang out with the U.A. students as civilians, he knew Marinette would have loved for the grumpy blonde to model her designs.

✦ Eventually the team finally meets Endeavor, who showed interest in mentoring the foreign heroes, but still not entirely trusting, keeps his interest hidden as he sets out to investigate them as much as he can. So, It was not so strange to see the miraculous team come to their home from time to time. Little did he know that they did not have the best image of him, with the blond cat being the most defensive.

✦ Ladybug taking out her inner Marinette bakes occasionally with Fuyumi, Shoto joining them most of the time to ruin the mixes awkwardly by accident. Although no one complains, they have a good time tasting the failed mixes and joking around.

 ✦ Chat Noir and Ryuko are not that close to the family, remaining neutral most of the time. Although Viperion makes his distrust of the flame hero clear, letting him know on more than one occasion. For him, his tune is confusing, but ignored It while he quickly becomes Natsuo's friend, teaching him how to play various songs on guitar.

✦ It turned out the spotted heroine had some things in common with the youngest son of the Todoroki clan, however, she soon noticed that he did not experience many situations that other teens his age did, it was like having a second Adrien Agreste at her side. Anyone said he didn't play ultimate mecha strike? Suddenly she taught him how to kick butts in that video game. He never heard of Jagged Stone? Unacceptable. Ladyluck casually gift him the Rock Giant album. Never went to paintball with friends? She would leave him so full of paint that it would take days to get rid of all the ink. The guy never seen The Fresh Prince of Bel Air? It was her job that the boy had some culture and some rest.

✦ Eventually they became close enough to make their own plans without having a third party present with them, despite how annoying it was that her transformation interrupted them in the best parts of the movies they watched together, or when they came out for a coffee and she had to find a hiding place to recharge her miraculous. Eventually he gave her a Kitsune mask as a gift, so she could protect her identity while hanging out together, also wanting the heroine took a souvenir for her to remeber him when she returned to Paris.

✦ But after thinking about it and remembering that her stay would be temporary, he couldn't help but feel saddened about her future return to France. Yes, he knew that every day the miraculous team teleported to fight akumas, he even followed them on missions sometimes along with Midoriya, but it was evident that it would not be the same; the girl was too professional to use her powers for selfish gain. Why would she teleport to see him? He had to get the idea that their friendship would not be the same once she leaves.

✦ The half redhead never expected at all that his dear friend was equally concerned about losing him due to distance. That's how united they had become.

[mythgirlimagines]

Well, my good Anons! Tuesday is here and so is this new talentswap! Introducing Myth, the Former Ultimate Fanfiction Author!

———————————————–

BACKSTORY AND TALENT

Growing up, Myth wasn’t very good at expressing herself via facial expressions or body language. Because of that, Myth didn’t have many friends growing up, besides Wyre. She quickly turned to cartoons and video games to fill the hole left in her heart. One day, Myth’s English teacher advised her to use writing as an outlet for her emotions. By her high school years, Myth has already amassed a large fanbase for her vast amount of fanfiction that touches even the most obscure of fandoms. Although her fanfiction runs the gamut of subject matter, she primarily focuses on romance and shipping, with LGBT dynamics being a major theme in most of her romantic works. She is currently chaperoning this year’s batch of Ultimates and Jr. Ultimates on their journey to Kibo-Con Ultimate. They also happen to make excellent references for her fanfiction.

———————————————–

RELATIONSHIPS

Wyre Anon, Former Ultimate Moral Compass

As hard as it is to believe, this rowdy juvenile delinquent runs one of the strictest disciplinary committees in the country. Wyre would regularly prevent others from picking on Myth, and they remain the best of friends well into their college years. Myth regularly looks up to Wyre for her assertive and expressive attitude, and she reminds Myth of those anime student council president characters mixed with a shonen protagonist.

Anon Scar, Ultimate Idol

As the lead vocalist of the famously-elaborate pop-rock idol group DaTenshi, Scar embraces the whole “Fallen Songstress“ persona that got Scar her fame in the first place. As much as Scar tries to stay true to her persona, her persona regularly cracks to reveal an overly-concerned mom friend. Myth views Scar as this odd combination of a School Idol, a Team Mom and a Chuunibyou, which makes for a weird combination of anime tropes.

Fusion Anon, Ultimate Soldier

Myth has consumed a ton of media about the military and if the media proves true, there is no reason for Fusion to appear as well-adjusted and confident as he carries himself. Fusion regularly tries to convince Myth that he is fine and that the war was all in the past. But Myth is an observant soul, and can tell that Fusion is close to breaking. Myth is, to put it lightly, really concerned for this poor lad. Just what is under his Team Dad facade and his garish camo clothes?

Fusion Anon II, Ultimate Biker Gang Leader

With Fusion II’s sassy and flippant attitude, topped off by her fashion of tall boots, long skirts and popped collars, there is no mistaking Fusion II as the leader of “The Divergence”, one of the largest girl gangs in all of the country. It is also extremely clear to Myth that her cool-headed and sarcastic demeanour is all but a coping mechanism, caused by living in a harsh environment, surrounded by equally harsh individuals. Truly a shining example of both the Sukeban trope and the Deadpan Snarker trope.

Just Anon, Ultimate Affluent Progeny

As the scion of the “Lagomor Corp”, one would expect Janon to be cruel, merciless and hardworking. But while Janon could be described as cruel and merciless, he is definitely not hardworking in the slightest, preferring to shirk his duties in favour of catching some Zs, which was very clearly caused by everything in life just being handed to him on a silver platter. However, Janon has one weakness: adorable fashion icons. That did not go unnoticed by Myth, much to the dismay of the Tsundere magnate.

Sparkle Anon, Former Ultimate Programmer

When Myth was told that an Ultimate Programmer would be chaperoning the Ultimates with her, Myth was expecting an Introverted Shut-In NEET. So imagine Myth’s internal surprise when this aspiring thespian with a volume problem who calls herself “THE SPECTACULAR SPARKLE” claimed to be the Ultimate Programmer. Despite their contrasting personalities, Myth and Sparkle probably are the closest when it comes to their interests. The two girls very quickly bonded over their shared interest in JRPGs, DND and isekai anime.

Egg Anon, Former Ultimate Detective, and Wet Sock Anon, Former Ultimate Martial Artist

As crazy as it may sound, Myth actually forged quite the odd bond with both Egg and Wet Sock, aka. The Freak Twins. Despite their violence-obsessed personalities and their tendency to constantly stick cursed and well, freakish comments into otherwise normal conversation, Myth managed to look past that to find wise and strong individuals, which was helped by Myth’s interest in gory mystery series and martial arts-based anime and video games. In fact, both twins seem to have grown a thing for Myth, because she was the first person they met that could handle the two of them.

Curious Anon, Jr. Ultimate Fashionista

Ever since Curious was in diapers, they have been educated in the art of fashion and cosmetics by their family. Curious has been modeling for a variety of high-class brands. Whether male, female and unisex clothes, Curious managed to make even the most garish and tacky clothes work for them. Despite the completely different domains of their talents, Myth and Curious quickly bonded over their similar polite and stoic demeanours. However, Myth can’t help but sense emptiness in Curious’s eyes every time they do a photo shoot. A Stepford Smiler perhaps?

Anon Nerd, Former Ultimate Gambler

Despite being praised for their poker face in tournaments, off the poker table, Nerd is a short-tempered and callous jerk, who constantly overreacts to otherwise inconsequential slights. Unfortunately for Nerd, he fell for Myth and he fell hard. Myth is no dummy, so with a perfect poker face every time, she manages to constantly torment Nerd with mind games and lewd comments in an effort to get him to confess. Will Nerd use the poker face he perfected since he began the art of gambling, or will Myth’s eternal poker face manage to conquer even the most trained? Truly a Showdown of the Ages.

Eldritch Anon, Ultimate Swimmer

As the underdog of his school’s swim team, Eldritch Anon’s small and frail build belies a streamlined shape and a flawless and speedy technique while in the water. Eldritch also has a paranoid and cowardly demeanour, and can and will dive into random bodies of water to avoid interacting with others. Much to Myth’s dismay, Eldritch seems to be the most scared of her. Eldritch seems to under the belief that Myth isn’t even human, when that simply isn’t the truth. She is just a girl who has trouble expressing herself. Myth wonders what could have gone wrong in Eldritch’s life to make him have such a vehement distrust of other Anons.

Dream Anon, Ultimate Lucky Student

Acting like someone straight out of a sports anime, no matter how many times her luck puts her into trouble, Dream always manages to get out of them with her head held up high. She might not be the Ultimate Volleyball Player like she wanted, but she always tries to stay positive, regardless of her title. Myth can’t help but feel as though at least part of Dream’s optimism is merely a facade to combat her feelings of inferiority to the other Ultimates, who got in with actual skill. That definitely would explain her Passionate Sports Girl personality, along with her hardworking attitude to the point of overexerting herself.  

Iris Anon, Jr. Ultimate Baseball Player

The other passionate sports fanatic on the Kibo-Con roster, Iris is well-known by baseball fanatics for her fast and hard swings that earn her baseball team, “The Comets” their unparalleled winstreak, as well as her adorkable and optimistic personality when off the diamond. Because of her social butterfly personality, Iris tries her best to interact with and understand Myth, or at least, the Myth beneath the constant poker face. Myth can’t help but applaud Iris for trying to look past her robotic face and mannerisms and learn more about her. 

Purple Anon, Ultimate Clairvoyant

Having been raised by a traditional family skilled in the art of fortune telling, Purple is by far the most skilled of her family, with a 66% percent accuracy rate to her fortunes. Purple, similar to Myth, is a massive wallflower, regularly cowering behind larger Anons. When Purple actually manages to open her mouth, her prose and vocabulary is about as purple as her hair.  Luckily, Myth is well-versed enough in the language-arts to actually understand what Purple is trying to say to others. Because of that, Myth kind of functions like Purple’s personal translator, simplifying her vocabulary for the less-intelligent Anons.

This Talentswap series centers around a stoic wallflower managing to become the Anon’s personal therapist. She came her for inspiration and references, and returned with a better understanding of her fellow chaperones and chaperonees.

———————————-———————

APPEARANCE

FicAuthor!Myth wears swirly opaque glasses to hide her eyebags earned from several sleepless nights. She wears her short dyed-purple hair into two short pigtails. She holds the pigtails in place with a pink scrunchie for the left and a blue scrunchie for the right. She wears a black hooded-jacket over a pink t-shirt, and has a matching pink backpack slung over her shoulders. She wears black sweatpants with a purple stripe on the opposite sides of each leg and purple sneakers. On her head, she wears a black beret that matches her jacket and sweatpants. On both the backpack and beret are pins from an assortment of fandoms.  ——————————————————

PERSONALITY

One of the major differences between FicAuthor!Myth and Romantic!Myth lies in her emotional range. While FicAuthor!Myth is fine-tuned when it comes to other people’s emotions, she isn’t very good at identifying or expressing her own emotions, whether through facial expressions, body language or tone of voice. FicAuthor!Myth’s face and vocal range is stuck in a constant monotone. The only way that FicAuthor!Myth can truly express her current emotions is quite obvious; via writing fanfiction that correspond to her current emotional state. However, beneath the monotony of her face and voice, FicAuthor!Myth is almost exactly like Romantic!Myth in personality; being kind, supportive and at times, a massive tease.  —-—————————————————

What do you think of FicAuthor!Myth, as both a talent and a series idea? I’d like to encourage other Anons to comment here with their opinions on it!

-Fusion Anon

—

Writing for my emotions is so accurate you don’t even know-

Anyway, love this version of me a lot!

[najatheangel]

hi, love !! i requested a selca ship from you once and i absolutely loved it !! may i request a written ship this time, please? groups would be nct 127, nct dream, and got7 <333

i’m an extroverted introvert. i’m naturally pretty outgoing and social but i also love being by myself and need alone time to recharge. i’m often mistaken as an extrovert in real life because i’m usually the one approaching people first and initiating or planning hang-outs for my friend groups. i’m pretty cheerful, light-hearted, easy-going, and non-judgemental. i strive for balance in life and i generally dislike conflict although i don’t hesitate to deal with it if necessary. i prefer focusing on the present moment rather than dwelling on the past or trying to forecast the future. for this reason, i can easily detach myself from certain people and situations (for better or for worse lmao). i’m a natural caretaker and i prefer to nurture people in more practical ways like being helpful or giving advice, but i don’t mind just being there for other people although a part of me always wishes i could do more. i may be more of a caretaker with my friends but being the youngest in my family, i do lowkey want to be doted on in private. i romanticize being organized and all but i’m really not :’) i TRY though. i’m also dangerously clumsy; i try and want to become more graceful but my coordination says no :)) i do feel things very deeply but i rarely show that. i prefer to deal with my emotions internally and by myself and then express them later in a more measured, rational, and calm way. i’m very independent and freedom of expression is very important to me and i believe everyone should have a right to that. i adore and appreciate all forms of art, especially written words; i love reading and writing. i just love literature. i also really enjoy aesthetically-pleasing things; i love taking aesthetic photos of nature or even people. self-care is also very important to me; i workout regularly, try to eat healthy, and meditate. i also have an immense love for learning and while a lot of topics interest me, i especially love history. i just find it so fascinating and i love it so much that it makes my heart skip a beat sometimes like i get too excited lmao. my mbti is isfp but i’ve also gotten i/enfp and esfp before (years ago lmao 😂)

i think that’s it !! thank you so much <333 i hope you’re well. have a wonderful day/night hehe

Hii faye, I’m happy I got to read more about you you seem like your life is full of joy and balance. The long wait is finally over, here goes your ship☺️🧚‍♂️

From NCT 127, I ship you with...Doyoung

Positive Side: Very beautiful love story from start to finish. During resonance promotions he remembered seeing you in the virtual fansign and even though your conversation was only 2 min, he was in lovestruck mode. He wanted to know more about you as a person and he was willing to try anything and do anything to find you. He found you with your group of friends at his favorite coffee shop and noticed how happy you were helping your friends study for their exams and stood out amongst the group yet at the same time wanted some quiet time alone. It took him a lot of courage, but he bumped into you in line and took his chance to confess and ask you out on the spot. It didn’t take long for you to say yes and the rest was history. Your both very natural when it comes to taking care of people around you which is a very good trait to have, because your both capable of providing to each other’s needs. Those simple acts of love such as feeding each other, helping each other through a problem and supporting each other’s achievements are what you both cherish the most. This man is your main model of study when it comes to taking photos so he won’t mind posing for you or even taking pictures together and changing it as his Home Screen on his phone. No worries about slipping on trying to eat healthy because this man is Gordan Ramsey 2.0 and he will help you keep your workout and diet plan together while you help him with your amazing literature skills how to compose better songs for the group.

Negative Side: Not every relationship is perfectly balanced. You both handle conflict in the same way. You obviously express your moods through your expressions if something is not sitting right with you, but then later would prefer to have a private conversation about the problem with that person. In the beginning when you first started dating, Doyoung wanted to have your back in almost any tough situation you were facing, but thre were times that you didn’t want him to fight your battles all the time to save the trouble. For example, if someone based horribly on your writing, Doyoung would defend you and have your back 100% in the most calm and family friendly way possible. It’s not that you don’t want his support in every situation, it’s just you’d prefer him to let you manage on your own and not add more stress into his life by barging in to your problems.

But...: Doyoung knows that he has to take it down a notch and let you face those haters on your own and barge in if needed. He love when you have his back on things, even with silly debates and fights against the members over who didn’t clean the laundry. Whenever he starts seeing you becoming vulnerable with him, he feels very special and is not afraid to help you heal through your experience. Even though sometimes it’ll seem like your both babying each other and snooping up in each other’s business, it’s better to release your emotions better than hiding it.

faye, get your man plsss...😳😳

From NCT Dream, I ship you with...Jaemin

Positive Side: The ultimate k-drama couple. First of all, your both ambiverts in all your friend groups meaning some days you want to stay behind the scenes other days you both tend to become the star of the show. Very fast you two would develop a friendship and from that point, he already made his mind of making you his one and only. He’s like the mom of Nct Dream taking care of his family, so when he notices how cheerful and light hearted you can be around your family and friends he just melts into a puddle gushing over how adorable you can be. The killer for him is how clumsy you can be. Dropping pans of cookies you just baked or falling in the ice rink when your skating together it just makes him want to protect you and keep you by his side more and more. Jaemin also appreciates your creativity and wants to brag about it to the whole world how talented you are. He’ll always ask you if he can be the first one to read your stories which makes him feel like you hold a special place in heart. He’s also a photographer himself and would be your camera man for when you need photos of yourself or pretty nature images for your Pinterest board. Of course most of the time he would want like 100+ pictures of you and him saved in his phone. Overall your the angel that he’s been waiting for all his life and would do anything to make you stay.

Negative Side: Knowing how charming this beautiful man can be, sometimes his flirting can get out of control. I know it’s just for fan service for the fans to eat up from, but sometimes it can sting a little. Once he was doing a collab stage with a rookie girl group member and they seemed to be pretty playful on stage. It didn’t bother you at first because you understand that this is Jaemin’s job, but it was all until she started to flirt with him and slide her arm on him which started to tick you off. You were pouting from the outside, but on the inside you wanted to go off so you kept your cool until you got home. Of course he tried to cuddle with you and kiss you, but you weren’t having it. He tried to even talk to you in his cute baby tone, but you ended up slamming the door on him and went straight to bed. “It was just a performance princess, nothing more nothing less.” “Try telling that to dispatch when they see you holding hands with that girl.”

But...: Jaemin is aware now that you have feelings to and don’t want to cause all these misunderstandings or else it’ll affect his relationship with you. He knocks softly on your door and carries you out of bed with the sweetest apology proposal with homemade breakfast, balloons with your name in big letters with a heart next to it and a big teddy bear that says I love you. The gesture almost put you to tears and decided that arguing with him over a performance with another woman is pointless to break up over. You give him the biggest smile and give him the tightest hug. “So does that mean you forgive me?” Puckers his lips out cutely begging for a kiss. “Hmmm, sure. Your punishment for now is no kisses for today.” You stuff his mouth with bacon and run off to the living room teasing him. “Ahh I guess I did deserve that huh. At least let me cuddle with you, I didn’t get to do that last night.” Opens his arms running after you in the dorms.

I wanted to ship you with Jeno too, but Jaemin just fit the picture.

From Got7, I ship you with...Jinyoung

Positive Side: The iconic couple in the music industry. You were Jinyoung’s secret girlfriend that no one knew about of course except for the got7 brothers. Your both very flirty yet friendly towards each other which makes everyone wish they had your kind of relationship. Not to mention your visuals together are insane. You both share you knowledge of literature and read on topics that are beneficial amongst yourselfs. Just like you, he’s willing to research on the latest news that’s going on in the world and later have a intellectual discussion on the topic. I can imagine him reaching out for your help on practicing his lines for his movies/dramas and would even try to reenact kiss scenes with you. With him being the gentleman he is, he naturally wants to save you from your clumsy moments. When your tripping on the carpets, forgetting your umbrella on a rainy day or even have hair in front of your face, he’ll become your fixer upper and provide your needs. He doesn’t mind lending you his umbrella, sliding your hair behind your ears and catching you from falling he’s happy to be your anpaman. He’s so understanding of how much you cherish your privacy because he’s not a clingy person himself, but every once in a while he would love to hold hands with you, pat the top of your head and let you know through words how much he adored you.

Negative Side: In the beginning, it was a challenge to have Jinyoung fall in love with you because as I mentioned earlier, he doesn’t seem like a person who would fall in love easily. He first thought of you as his innocent sister that he wants to protect from all harm and would scare away guys that would try to date you. He’s also very savage when it comes to expressing his love to you so it might come out cold, but that’s not his intentions. For example, if you blow his a kiss, he would act like he’s disgusted and flick it away. He actually loves you blowing kisses at him and would want you to keep doing it. He express his love in a different way even though it might not be the best through his actions.

But...: This man is a living poet and very talented in the arts. Once he realized how much he loved you and wanted to make you his girlfriend, he returned your feelings through a song he written, produced and sung along with his members. He even made a music video about it sharing all the pictures you took of you two together with your permission of course and expressed through his song how happy he was to have you apart of his crazy life and that your the only girl on his life that only made him feel this way. It was your favorite gift from him ever since you made it official.

Out of everyone, I ship you with...Doyoung

@starrdustville I know this was super long, but I hope this somewhat made your day/night. Thanks so much for your patience love yaa.✨💗

[benjaming1205]

Not So Berry Mobile Edition

Have you done the Not So Berry Challenge in The Sims 4? Do you want more? Are you broke and only play The Sims Mobile? Well I hope your up to take up the originally by @lilsimsie . A challenge converted from The Sims 4 to The Sims Mobile!

Introducing The Not So Berry Challenge Mobile Edition! A ten generation legacy with a focus on bright colours and new experience.

1. All heir must be female.

2. Each heir must represent the colour and a theme of the generation (i.e. hair, makeup, clothing), but brightly colored skin is not necessary (these aren’t actually berry Sims, that’s the joke). Of course, this is optional but a big portion of the fun.

3. One room has to be dedicated to the heir and need to be decorated based on their colour and theme. (a bedroom is the most practical)

4. Each of the heir’s name has to be almost similar to the colour that they are representing (i.e. the colour is rose, therefore the name can be Rosie) and the last name can only be Berry.

5. Each time you start a new heir, it has to be fresh out of the box. Your heir can’t be a townie or a child and they can’t get the Good Upbringing Trait.

6. The colors of the spouses don’t matter as they aren’t part of the challenge. Unless otherwise stated you can do whatever you please with them.

7. Every generation is supposed to complete all tasks that they’re given of the heir unless explicitly stated otherwise.

8. You need most of the traits. The trait level doesn’t matter. You’ll get to choose two traits but the other two are fixed.

9. If you play this challenge and want to share it with us, go ahead and post with #NotSoBerryMobile so we can see!

Generation One: Mint (Intelligence Boho)

You’re a odd scientist. One day you wish d to open an art gallery but not only that but also to release your own single but your mother forbids you from pursuing your dream as it will not last. For now you just love sharing your creation with other so even, you even decided to have a one night special to showcase your work.

Traits: Musical, Creative

Career/Hobby: Lab Science

Task:

• Complete the Lab Science Career Story

• Complete Art Aficionados TWICE

• Complete Soundtrack of Soul Story TWICE

• Make the heir of the generation to host a studio party ONCE

Generation Two: Rose (Legal Seducer)

You work at a very justifying place, the Civic Centre but you love to head out of town and meet every guy you know. Then bringing back home to have a hot and steamy time. The room is never clean and filled with cameras and studio lights? That’s sounds fishy. While seducing other people around town you came across a friend that you never seen for quite some time. You realise that friend was into you and seduce the person back at home only realising that you were pregnant with the person’s baby.

Traits: Alluring, Evil

Career: Law

Hobby: Internet Icon

Tasks:

• Complete the Hand-Knit Justice Story

• Complete the Authentically Iconic Story

• Complete the Tainted Love Story TWICE

• Complete the Secret Crush Story TWICE

• Complete A Missed Connection Story ONCE

• MAKE at least one child with the person from A Secret Crush Story

Generation Three: Yellow (The Astronaut’s Baby Factory)

Growing up you never had a close relationship with anyone since you have a disease called Babytouchositis (Baby-touch-o-site-tis) which is when you touch anyone you would instantly get pregnant. You were quarantined this whole time and spent the majority of your time alone in your room obsessing over space. You just really love space. You’ll do whatever it takes to get to Sixam no matter the cost even if you had to meet people and get pregnant.

Traits: Ambitious, Athletic

Career: Rocket Science

Tasks:

• Complete the Rocket Science Story

• Reach Chapter 3 with 7 other Sims

• MAKE at least 7 babies with different “daddies”

• Name the baby after the colours of the rainbow and dress them up according to the colour they’re given

Generation Four: Sliver (The Dazzling Introvert)

You are a very trendy person and your always up in your taste. But in your free time you like to relax and meditate. The kids (from the prev generation) is worried about you all by yourself. They want to reunite you with one of your high school friends. After the work the kids have done you have been reunited with your friend. You and your friend had a great time together and was wondering if they could be more then friends. You then adopt two kids and make them as your own

Traits: Stylist (If you don’t have it choose Creative), Active

Career: Fashion Designer OR Hair Stylist

Hobby: Yoga

Tasks

• Complete the Trending Now Story OR ASOS Fashion Forecast Story OR A Cut Above Story

• Complete the Yay for Vinyavas! Story

• Complete the Better Late then Never Story until Chapter 5 SEVEN TIMES (possible with the 7 kids from the prev generation)

• Complete More then Friends with Benefits Story ONCE

Generation Five: Chocolate (E-Girl Writer)

You are very sad person and you friends with some sad people too. You are extremely close to them. Your friend soon have a significant other and you need to find one before your friends start to tease you. You got a job to become a barista and shockingly enough your co-worker asked you out. Your co-worker is the total opposite of you but you let him into your life hoping to change yourself. He/She don’t want to change you and feel just right for him/her. Soon you two begin to settle down and started a family and making sure you’re always there for your kids making sure they will not become sad like you did. You soon begin to document your amazingly-sad life with your husband/wife, your kids and the support of your friends

Traits: Artisan, Mean

Career: Barista

Hobby: Writing

Tasks

• Complete The Way of Latte Story

• Complete the Tales from the Script Story

• Complete the Misery Loves Company THREE times

• Complete The Fixer-Upper Story with your co-worker (unless it’s an elder, if so, you’re free to choose any TOWNIES)

• Get married to your co-worker

• Have TWO babies with your co-worker

• Get both kids’ Good Upbringing Trait to a THREE star

Generation Six: Orange (Perfect Everything)

Just because of your mom (from the previous generation) your life is tied with a ribbon. Just like your typical American family. A loving significant other, two amazing kids, an excellent job and you friends who always comes over to spill some tea. But you heart sank knowing that your husband has been cheating on you with one of your friends and your friends are spilling tea about you! But you ignore those facts and made sure you kids become kind and caring people.

Traits: Good, Competitive

Career: Business

• The heir can be a FEMALE child from the previous generation

• Complete the Like Nobody’s Business Story

• Complete the Frenemies Story THREE times

• Complete the Soulmates Story ONCE

• Get married to your significant other

• Have TWO babies with your significant other

• Make your significant other cheat on you

• Get both kids’ Good Upbringing Trait to a THREE star

Generation Seven: Pink (Life of the Party)

You were a mega party-goer in your younger days, attending hundreds of parties hosted by your friends and family. And now, you're doing it again, except with more fun and more... steaming hot. You have always wanted to become the most amazing host of a party, which made you The party-giver in multiple events in your house. But you needed more space, more fun and more crazy and music, and the key to that: A DJ. But something was missing... You needed a partner in this music industry to help host the ultimate party. And when you found the right person for the job, you go on the journey for hosting the party everyone will remember...

Traits: Party Animal, Outgoing

Career: DJ

• Complete the Remixology Story

• Attend Level 10 Parties SIX times in a row

• Make the heir of this generation host a Concert Party TWICE

• Complete the More then Friends with Benefits Story ONCE

• Get married to your significant other

Generation Eight: Green (Life Saver)

Your hands work like magic! Anything you touch will save the person physically, mentally and spiritually. Your works creates a big buzz both good and bad. Mostly bad, you will soon begin to have a lot of rivals coming to your door step. Could you handle the pressure?

Traits: Generous, Attuned

Career: Medical OR Surgeon OR Wellness Guru

• Complete the Something in the Water OR The Mystery Cure OR The Mysterious Benefactor Story

• Complete BFF Forever Story THREE times

• Complete the Old Rivals Story FOUR time

Generation Nine: Gold (Danger in the Building)

You are hot-headed person. Your temper can go at out of any building you’re in. If things don’t go your way expect everyone to evacuate the building IMMEDIATELY! Everyone is afraid of you, including your own significant other. At the end, you guys didn’t ended up getting married. You guys also avoided doing anything physical together that you decide to adopt a boy instead. But whenever your angry you cool down by plucking the strings on a guitar. You temper didn’t just appear out of nowhere. When you were young, you’ve always wanted to be a boy but society didn’t agree that’s why you adopted a boy. So that you can feel it through him.

Traits: Evil, Competitive

Hobby: Guitar

• Complete the Six-String Fling Story

• Complete the Tainted Love Story ONCE with a Male Sim

• Complete the Arch-Nemesis Story FOUR time

• Adopt a boy with the Male Sim

• Get the kid’s Good Upbringing Trait to TWO stars

Generation Ten: Blue (High Taste, Secret Life)

You are the Toast of the Town! A luxurious house (in this case a room), friend who never back stabbed you, and may other find taste.... in food. You also been seeing someone. The person seems cute. But even with your exquisite life you also been working at the cafe. For your friends may wonder why you are a barista when you own such a majestic house (room) but one of them spotted you going down an elevator in very suspicious clothings. It’s best to keep this secret away, especially from your crush’s baby

Traits: Foodie, Sly

Career: Secret Agent

Hobby: Cooking

• Complete the Top Secret Story

• Complete the Now We’re Cooking Story

• Complete any friendship story THREE times

• Complete the Secret Crush Story ONCE

• Have a baby with your secret crush

• Make the heir of the generation host a Foodie Party ONCE

More optional generations will be coming soon! I’m open to feedback. I’d like to thank you for my friend, Owen for helping out writing some of the generation’s story. I would like to thank everyone’s support too! Without it, I don’t think I wouldn’t be able to make it without you! Hope to see your Not So Berry!

[seriousfic]

So Spider-Man: Homecoming strikes me as largely a... ummmm... unholy aberration? In that it’s a comic book adaptation that largely isn’t based on the comic book, it’s based on John Hughes movies from the eighties. And then at the same time, it’s modernized and updated and diversified because it can’t be old and outdated like the Dikto comics (although Ultimate Spider-Man was largely the same), but then all that modernization and updating is based on... the eighties.

1. Diversity

I suppose we might as well start with the elephant in the room. In the lead-up to Homecoming being released, there were a ton of articles backpatting Marvel (or backpatting themselves, rather) over how much of the cast was non-white. Not that you’d know it from looking at the poster, of course.

I just have problems. One, the diversity itself. I see it as mainly Marvel trying to placate the fans who wanted Miles Morales, a little like a dad who forgot his kid’s birthday so at the gas station he got a Sandlot DVD or whatever. “No, you’re not Spider-Man, but you CAN be... Ned Leeds! Don’t ya wanna be Ned Leeds, negroes?” Like, does that really matter that much? Are there black people dancing in the streets because Liz Allan is biracial? Is it really that big a deal that Spider-Man’s sidekicks and/or love interests are minorities, when that was also the case in Captain America, Iron Man, Guardians of the Galaxy, Ant-Man, etc. And all of them did it without this racebending that was apparently so necessary. 

It also bugs me that Marvel justifies it by going “well, we’re just reflecting the real world diversity in New York! hashtag stay woke!” Yeah, they’re just reflecting the real world. Like in Captain America, when they reflected the reality of the segregated army of the 1940s.

Or how they reflected that all of the Norse gods were, y’know, kinda Norse.

It’s not that it’s such a bad argument, it’s just that I see it argued in bad faith a lot. When it suits their needs, people on the Left argue “hey, it’s realistic, you have to do X!” (see the Dunkirk “controversy”) Then when it doesn’t suit their needs, they argue “hey, there are dragons or aliens or whatever, it doesn’t need to be realistic! We can say that in 1966, the US army was all lesbian schoolgirls! Who cares?”

Just pick a position and stick to it. Also, maybe that diversity should carry over to the bad guys as well. Remember the head of a Middle Eastern terrorist organization, according to Marvel?

Or the head of a Far East cult?

Anyway, all this limp-wristed apologizing for Peter Parker being Spider-Man instead of Miles Morales comes off as especially galling when he’s getting his own movie. No other legacy character is getting that good a deal. There aren’t two Batman movies coming out, one with Dick Grayson and one with Bruce Wayne. And yet, Peter Parker’s movie still has to suffer and even incorporate a bunch of Miles Morales’s canon for no real reason. If you’re going to make a Peter Parker movie, make a Peter Parker movie, not this half-assed “oh, it’s Peter, but don’t worry, Miles is on his way, sorry, sorry, sorry!”

2. Flash

I don’t buy the Flash Thompson update at all. Like, is that really how bullying works now? The popular, cool nerd picking on the unpopular, lame nerd? It’s like, they’re both on the academic decathlon team. Flash is picking on Peter because he’s a better mathlete than him. Imagine Flash Thompson as a football player, and Peter is another football player who’s better at it than him, and somehow Flash is at the top of the social hierarchy and Peter’s at the bottom. Does that make any sense?

Of course, if they were really going to update Peter’s bullying, it would seem like they would at least mention cyberbullying, instead of just making Peter’s ‘tormentor’ a guy who makes passive-aggressive comments that Peter doesn’t even seem to notice. I feel like the irony of Peter being far stronger than Flash, but obviously unable to haul off and sock him one, plus the irony of Flash being a fan of Spider-Man but disliking Peter, is way stronger than whatever they’re trying to accomplish by giving him an ‘intellectual rival.’

Also, is making Peter’s nemesis a rich prick really that much more original than his nemesis being a jerk jock? REALLY?

3. MJ

I would argue their rendition of ‘MJ’ is way less faithful than the outright loathed Deadpool in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Wolverine, you get at least a couple of scenes where Ryan Reynolds is playing Wade Wilson, he’s making jokes, he has two katanas... he turns into an abomination, but he spends several scenes not as an abomination.

Michelle... they adapted a famously dancing party girl and all they had her talk about was how she hates parties. She’s literally the exact opposite of Mary Jane. Even the watered down MJs in the Raimi movies, Ultimate comics, and SMLMJ were still popular, positive characters. 

Michelle, again, exact opposite. I have no idea why people are cool with this except that either they’re fetishizing, like, any black people at all--Chris Tucker could come in and scream “HELP ME, SPIDER-MAN, I GOT THESE CRIMINALS ALL OVER ME!” and they’d go yay, representation matters--or they hate Mary Jane in the first place and wouldn’t care if Marvel turned her into Norman Osborn’s chief assassin and baby-killer.

In which case, it seems you should complain a little just on principle. Isn’t any character entitled to a little better treatment than this? Especially a famous female character that has a lot of fans who she means something to? If you’re going to make this character a socially awkward nerd, why not at least name her after Gwen Stacy or Debra Whitman, who are at least something like that in canon? Even if you’re just a Gwen Stacy fan, do you want the waters muddied so that now a (nominally) completely different character has traits adopted from your fave? Do you like it when female characters are treated as completely interchangeable?

4. Ned

The last of the new kids/updates/whatever the fuck is Ned, and fuck him. Fuck him in his stupid Ganke face yes I said it. I guess we’re going to ignore the hypocrisy of Ganke being the most faithfully adapted character in a Spider-Man movie, but Marvel casting an actor of a different ethnicity, so they give the character the name of another character of yet another ethnicity to cover, because everything is stupid and sucks all the time now.

BUT ANYWAY, all this just so Peter can have “a guy on a computer”? He already has Karen, which is enough of a fucking departure already, and the movie even points out how cliched a guy on a computer is! Smallville did it, Birds of Prey did it, Arrow does it, The Flash does it, Supergirl does it--does Spider-Man really have to crib notes from those fucking pikers?

The bigger problem, though, is this.

5. Secret identity

I understand Marvel deciding Peter can’t just have an internal monologue, they need to give him a character to talk to so the audience can know how he’s feeling. The Amazing Spider-Mans did that with Gwen and, at least theoretically, I’m fine with that.

My issue is that Marvel took Peter, one of their most introverted and neurotic characters, and let his entire supporting cast know he’s Spider-Man!

Seriously. Let’s check who in the cast knows he’s Spider-Man by the end of the movie.

1. Ganke/Ned

2. Tony Stark

3. Happy Hogan

4. (presumably) Pepper Potts

5. Michelle suspects/could know (so should that be half?)

5.5. Aunt May

6. The Vulture

7. Karen

So... essentially everyone but fucking Flash. One or two of these would be fine, but he can fucking take everyone who knows out to a buffet and have a roundtable discussion on what to do about the Scorpion. What about him being a loner? What’s the point of a secret identity if everyone who matters knows? What about him having to figure stuff out on his own? 

6. Rich uncle

So let me ask you something. Aunt May gets really sick--in fact, her being chronically ill would be a good way to replicate the comics’ elderly May instead of May being the bread-winner in a family that seems comfortably middle class, cough cough--what does Peter do? Does he go to the Daily Bugle and beg Jameson for an assignment? Is he tempted to rob a bank or just take some money from a crook he’s busted? How does he pay for this?

Well, in this canon, obviously he just asks Tony to write him a check.

It’s so odd, because you’d think the idea of Peter Parker as being financially unstable and constantly struggling with money troubles would be more relevant than ever these days. Yet, by making him Tony’s fucking surrogate motherfucking son, that aspect is totally neutered. Why does this Peter need to work at the Bugle at all? Why should he do anything except ask Stark--the guy who buys masterpieces he’s never even heard of on a lark--for money and then goof off?

In the comics, at least initially, Peter is constantly being Spider-Man not only to fight injustice, but also because the photographs he takes of himself fighting supervillains is the only way he has to make a living and support his aunt. Homecoming, May can support herself, he has Tony as the world’s biggest safety net, so the Spider-Man thing seems less a responsibility and more like a fun hobby he does for shits and giggles.

I’m not saying Spider-Man should be Batman, angsting and brooding over being a superhero, but shouldn’t there be some mixed feelings and conflict over it? 

And, for a character who iconically has to repair his own costume with a sewing kit, does it not seem really inappropriate for him to now be wearing a Harrier jet? They try to adapt the part in Civil War where he rejects the Iron Spider suit, but since the Iron Spider suit is here the classic costume we all want to see him in, now he rejects an even more advanced powered armor suit, while keeping the still very advanced powered armor suit that is somehow supposed to be down-home and authentic.

(I guess no one pointed out that the entire Tony-Peter relationship throughout Civil War ended with Peter realizing what an anus Tony was and rejecting him.)

6a. Rich spotlight-stealing uncle

By the way, this totally takes the emphasis off Peter as a genius in his own right (which is, remember, the reason he’s supposed to have this deep bond with Tony in the first place). Who cares if Peter invented webbing and webshooters if that’s only 1% of what his suit can do and everything else is this stupendous stuff Tony Stark came up with? You might as well go whole-hog and say that Peter was just doing parkour before and Tony invented everything. Peter isn’t even the one to hack into his own suit, he needs Gankned for that. 

7. Rich SUPERHERO uncle

Also, we’ve established that this Spider-Man isn’t qualified to fight supervillains and is expected to call for back-up whenever he runs into one, unless he’s just stupidly prideful (which is, y’know, irresponsible--not very Spidery). For the plot to work, thus we get this dumb conflict where Tony and Hogan apparently ignore Peter’s ass, only for them to ‘heartwarmingly’ reveal that they really have listened and paid attention to his missives. They just, you know, never actually tell him that or really anything (doesn’t Tony seem like the kind of guy who would at least text Peter? Probably a lot? He seems to love hanging out with the Avengers and chatting about superhero stuff otherwise...)

I know Tony is supposed to be that stupid, even after ten movies where the theme is “Tony learns not to be that stupid,” but does that really sound like something Hogan and especially Pepper would go along with?

It’s contrived enough in the first place that we’d end up in a situation where Peter is trying to call Iron Man in on this supervillain hoedown going on right now, but they won’t take his calls, so what happens in the sequel? Peter runs into the Lizard, he calls the Avengers, they say “sorry, kid--we’re all busy”? I’m not ungenerous, I’ll accept that in most solo movies, Thor or Captain America won’t call in the cavalry, but with Spider-Man, isn’t it just child endangerment to say “yeah, we know we’re supposed to help you, but it’s your solo movie, we’re not springing for ScarJo and Hulk’s FX team, we’re already giving Sony fifty percent”?

Maybe when they were ripping off Supergirl’s ‘guy at the computer,’ they should’ve realized how bad it looks when Superman is out there somewhere protecting the world, but won’t help out Supergirl no matter how bad it gets, because either she or he is an idiot.

8. The Vulture

I guess everyone likes the idea of a sympathetic, Walter White Marvel supervillain they didn’t notice the movie doesn’t actually do that? In the very first scene (before the studio logos, even!), he seems like a decent enough guy, but one time-skip later and he’s the Vulture, without seeming the least bit conflicted or remorseful about his actions. (We also immediately see him in costume, and it seems like they should’ve saved that until his first attack on Spider-Man.)

He talks a good game about how oppressed he is, but really, he seems to just do typical supervillain shit like killing his underlings for failing him, only then he literally says “whoops, I meant to use the NOT killing him raygun!” Ambiguity! Who gives a shit?

I, too, like the idea of a supervillain who starts off maybe not that bad and then becomes more desperate and dangerous as Spidey closes in on him, but really, Vulture is just another supervillain with a doomsday plan, only it takes him until the end for him to finally say “yeah, let’s go ahead with the doomsday plan!”

9. There is going to be Iron Man in your Iron Man/Spider-Man team-up movie, right?

I know a lot of people were worried about Iron Man dominating what is, after all, a Spider-Man movie, but I feel somewhat the opposite. If you’re going to have trailers ending in big money shots of Spider-Man and Iron Man running around side by side (shots that weren’t ever in the movie but were filmed just for the trailer) and posters with giant Iron Man front and center.

(This is actually three posters joined together and it’s depicting a scene that doesn’t even happen a little!)

It kinda seems like Iron Man should be important to the plot. Like Black Widow in Winter Soldier. That was a Captain America movie, clearly, but Widow had a big part to play. Homecoming, it seems more like Tony Stark cameos, only that makes it into all the trailers and posters. Why is there not a scene of Spider-Man and Iron Man fighting together? Or even of the Vulture hacking Iron Man and forcing him to fight Spider-Man? Or some development of this Vulture/Iron Man feud that’s alluded to, but then pretty much has nothing to do with anything (tell me, how would the movie be different if, say, Danny Rand had founded Damage Control instead of Stark?).

I’m just saying, if we’re going to have this character in the movie at all, why not use him to the fullest, or somewhere near the fullest? Kinda seems like the most important thing Tony does in this is get back together with Pepper so we can tie up that dangling plot thread from Civil War. 

10. The Shocker

Okay, I know this is pedantic, but it bugs me. So they have the Shocker in this as Vulture’s henchman. That’s fine--Shocker was never going to be anything other than the Scarecrow to other people’s Ra’s al Ghul. But why did they have to handle him in such an awkward way?

First, what happened to his costume? I remember there were behind-the-scenes pictures of it that looked perfectly serviceable.

Even the old video games did a ‘grounded, realistic’ take that looked halfway decent.

The toy looked fine too.

Then in the actual movie...

Oh... he’s that guy with the yellow sleeves holding a laser gun. Wait, two guys. Great.

Fucking Whiplash is dressed to the nines in comparison. What happened?

Then there’s this sequence of events. So in the movie, the OG Shocker is Montana Bryce, played by Logan Marshall-Green. (He really has nothing to do with the Shocker except in Spectacular Spider-Man, where it made sense because the Enforcers were already established characters, so they basically handed the character the tech and said presto, the Shocker.)

(Hence my theory that they’re not so much are adapting the comics than they are the comics’ Wikipedia pages. Well, that and fucking John Hughes movies, because instead of the covers or iconic panels, that’s what they pay homage to.)

Anyway, he fails Vulture, Vulture says “you’ve failed me for the last time” and kills him, then says that Herman Schultz (Shocker I in the comics) is now the Shocker. Herman Schultz--which sounds like something a black teenager would get on his fake ID in a Wayans Bros movie--is played by Bokeem Woodbine, who also seems way too intimidating and competent for the character.

But I guess he’s the official Shocker now and the whole Montana thing was just to show how ruthless the Vulture, except that they walked it back because he’s really sympathetic and honorable, except, except...

I can understand wanting a black supervillain for their Sinister Six movie and it would actually be fitting to the canonical, hard-luck Herman Schultz to end up being killed off and replaced by a more capable character. Y’know, unlike the time von Strucker got defeated in the opening scene then killed off-screen.

The point is, if they’d just switched it so that Logan Marshall-Green (or a more comedic actor) was playing Herman Schultz and Bokeem Woodbine was playing, I don’t know, John Cena/Shocker II, it would fit a hundred times better. But they just didn’t care. 

11. “My friends call me MJ” is stupid and I hate it and I hate you

I shouldn’t have to explain that making a character the exact opposite of any shred of prior characterization she’s had, then ‘revealing’ she really is the character she’s purposely been given no resemblance to is stupid Mystery Box bullshit. It’s like if the next Star Trek movie had a character named “the Sarge” with round ears who constantly guzzled beer and got emotional and said that logic sucked, then at the end, he said “well, my real name is Spock” and then the producer had to go online to say that he’s not the Spock but he is a Spock and him having pointed ears is something only racists care about and anyway he’s a new take on the character, get off our backs!

It’s not even a twist! It’s just giving the audience incorrect information, then declaring that incorrect information is suddenly correct.

But okay! I guess nothing means anything anymore and life is pointless. So let’s say that you have an audience who has never read a Spider-Man comic in their lives. (We’ll call them the target audience.) In fact, they’ve never even heard of Spider-Man. Not Green Goblin, not Doctor Octopus. They didn’t see the Sam Raimi movies or the Marc Webb movies or any of the cartoons. As far as they’re concerned, Spider-Man didn’t exist before he showed up in Civil War (which was very confusing for them, because they didn’t explain his powers or his origin or why he was living with his hot aunt instead of his parents or anything at all).

But this audience watches the movie Spider-Man: Homecoming and takes this character Michelle at face value. At the end, she says “My friends call me MJ.”

Well... so what? That doesn’t change anything for the audience. It doesn’t affect the plot. It’s the equivalent of having Verbal Kint, at the end of The Usual Suspects, reveal that he has a limp and a canker sore. 

Of course we, the prospective audience, do know that Michelle is Peter’s love interest, because she was the top-billed female lead and did all the press with Tom Holland and is the only woman who’s not a Parker family member on the poster. Oh, and because MJ is historically a big Peter Parker love interest. Except we literally don’t know or care anything about her personality or appearance or backstory or relationships with different characters other than that. But for the audience member who knows nothing else about MJ except that she fucks Peter Parker, this is a big deal. Unless in the sequel, they decide not to have her as the love interest after all.

Are you getting my point here? It’s not even a good twist. A good twist would be if the Liz Allan character were referred to as MJ, then at the end it was revealed that it stood for Marion Juliet or whatever, and that she had never been Mary Jane. Or if Zendeya (why doesn’t she have a fucking last name? You’re 20, no 20-year-old has ever been iconic, get over yourself, you’re not goddamn Cher) had said “my friends call me Harriet Osborn,” that at least would’ve been something definitive, because we would’ve known Norman is coming and he’s related to this girl.

But just... this bitch may or may not be their take on Mary Jane and she may or may not get with Peter and that may or may not come to anything... who the hell cares? It’s like a negative twist. Everyone saw it coming and it makes the story less interesting now that it’s been revealed. It’s like if the first episode of How I Met Your Mother ended with Saget saying “oh, I end up with Robin, spoiler alert.” Okay, why are we watching the fucking show now? Either you lied and that information is even more pointless than it already is or you’re going to fuck Cobie Smolders and the whole thing is a foregone conclusion. 

12. Lights! Camera! Action?

The action scenes are all short and unsatisfying, especially given that they’re using the Vulture, yet their prequeletic decision not to let Spider-Man actually web-swing (because he hasn’t earned it yet, dontchaknow) means that they don’t let them have any real memorable aerial duels. I guess so much for the entire reason to use that character.

They have all the ingredients for it to work--numerous henchmen armed with high-tech weaponry, an inexperienced (and borderline incompetent) Spider-Man, yet he pretty much just steam-rolls through everyone by virtue of his Amazing Technicolor Spidey-Suit. It makes you think that’s all that’s keeping him from being completely invulnerable is his own ineptitude and failure to properly utilize his suit. 

It’s like they knew they couldn’t pull off a better action scene than the train sequence in Spider-Man 2, so instead of at least trying to do so--like taking advantage of modern technology to give us a big Vulture fight among the skyscrapers, or giving us the Iron Man/Spider-Man team-up that was the whole point of this movie--they just turned the action scenes into open mic night. Oh, look, Spider-Man’s getting hit with golf balls! And he’s recreating Ferris Bueller jumping on a trampoline from 31-year-old movie Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, all very relevant and modern and updated and today’s youth! Hey, audience, we’re not taking this seriously, so why should you? Just give it a soft pass, c’mon, dontcha like Spider-Man?

I just think that, when you have this smug “we’re going to do it RIGHT” attitude of naming your movie ‘Homecoming’ and (deservedly) throwing the ASM movies under the bus, aren’t you obliged to actually follow through and do Spider-Man right instead of this bastardized hybrid of John Hughes, white Miles Morales, teen movie cliches, political correctness, Tony Stark branding, and all this other crap that has jack all to do with Peter Parker? Because they had the perfect opportunity, with the decoy Liz Allan love interest and setting multiple movies in high school, to actually do a very faithful adaptation of the comics, of Spider-Man’s supporting cast... even just having Mary Jane cameo in a few scenes, being this quipping fun-lover but not yet a love interest, would’ve done so much to make this feel like Spider-Man instead of an Iron Man spin-off. Which is what it is.