#that makes it feel a million tines qorse and like itll never change constatly | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

hadtochangeuserbecauseimparanoid · 2 years ago

Text

Me: I feel like no one but babe understands the hell I go through mentally

Also me 5 minutes later after he reeneters the room to essentially ignore me because I guess my distress is too much or something: nope no one understands whatsoever at all

#like i swear when i cant medicate with shweed i have horrible emotional flashbacks and my brain hates me and tells me im worthless qnd a #burden and i try to calm down but i literally cant my mind moves too fast qnd before i know it im literally sobbing over nothing #and most of the time i rememebr he just genuinely has no idea how to help me when im like this like neither do ir but right now it really #feels like he just is so tired of me crying and struggling he doesnt wanna deal with it #and theb it just feeds ibto this feeling of being q burden and worthless even more and more and more and i LITERALLY CANT bring myself dow #bc my braibs chemicals are absolutely freaking out qnd theres no fucking switch for that other than things to alter those chemicals #and ubtil i feel even q crumb or seratonin creep its way in when i hate myself and everything do i start to feel like hm maybe life is wort #living now i can calm down hut otherwise not only is our situation shit in every aspect but i have to have an illness #that makes it feel a million tines qorse and like itll never change constatly #that tells me i will never ever result to shit because i cant 3ven manage my own tears or my own mind how can i manage a job and check qnd #a life and bills qbd #qnd i juat feel useless and im tured im so so so tired of my brain torturing itself

0 notes