#that and i need to recuperate because I was burned out pretty bad today but when i came back from getting lost (wandering around) for like

[redwineconversation]

Olympique Lyonnais - St Polten OLPlay Postgame Interviews

I know everyone has a burning question for this postgame interview so let me kill the suspense immediately: no, the PSL I am sipping while doing this translation does not erase how bad the performance was during this game.

Blah blah standard disclaimers apply; @OL Comms Dept it's cold enough in LA that I have to wear a sweater AND a jacket pls help me cover the PSL and heat bill; I hate stans so fucking much you have no idea; y'all know the speech by now.

I wish I could make funny puns but honestly this game was genuinely painful to watch. I was audibly groaning at some of the misplaced passes.

@timothee Piron @coralie Ducher felt like pure shit, so glad I have you back.

OLYMPIQUE LYONNAIS OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEWS

GRIEDGE M'BOCK OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEW

Journalist: Griedge, congratulations on the win. Mission accomplished for Lyon tonight.

M'Bock: Yes, mission accomplished. It was - we wanted the win, it's what we got. Now, we know within the context [of the game] we should do much better. But it was important today to impose ourselves and that's what happened.

Journalist: In terms of what the team presented, what were your impressions, especially having seen the first half from the bench and having come on afterwards?

M'Bock: I think we started the game pretty well. We were able to create some chances, we were able to score. And after that I think we dropped in efficiency. We started to play their game. It was quite physical at times, there was a lot of aggression, a lot of fouls. And we fell into a false rhythm, which put us in difficulty a bit in terms of the style of play. And that's why we didn't play our best, but as I said, the win is the most important thing tonight, and that's what was done.

Journalist: What did Sonia tell you at half time?

M'Bock: Mostly to do things correctly. We know it, as soon as we rush things, then we struggle to create chances, struggled to get in front of goal and create scoring opportunities. And we saw today, we scored two goals, we won, but I think we could have scored more.

Journalist: Do you think there is some tiredness that's starting to show? Because we're at the end of November and the games are one after the after.

M'Bock: Yes, it's possible. We're also in a period where it's cold. We're playing consecutive games, be it in the [French] league or in the Champions League. But that shouldn't be an excuse. We're Olympique Lyonnais, we know what we want to win. So that shouldn't be an excuse. But we can feel that we're playing consecutive games and we know we need some fresh legs. We're going to really analyze this game, get some proper rest, recuperate properly, and then play against Guingamp on Sunday.

Journalist: Fresh legs is synonym with turnover. That's what's been put in place since the start of the season, particularly at the center back position. How do you experience that as players, you, Wendie [Renard], Vanessa [Gilles]?

M'Bock: It's true that we're lucky to be able to rotate, to get playing time as well. I'm coming back from injury, I was out for a while, and to be able to play and not just that, play consecutive games, that's important for me and I am lucky to get that playing time. I think it allows us to give everyone a break, because we have a lot of games between the league, the Champions League, and games with the national teams. That's all things to take into consideration. So it's important to have a deep bench.

Journalist: One last question, it's a bit more personal. It's going to be return to Briton for you with Guingamp and also with the [French] National Team, there's going to be a game at Rennes.

M'Bock: Yes, it's a return to your roots. There's a lot of happiness, a lot of anticipation. That's where I started, it's where I first discovered football. So I am happy to be going back.

Journalist: Thank you, Griedge.

ELLIE CARPENTER OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEW

Journalist: First of all, congratulations on the win. How did you feel about the team's performance tonight?

Carpenter: Thank you. Yes, we're happy with the three points and the win. But for the performance [Carpenter scoffs], we need to do much better next time. But it's three points and le a clean sheet. I think it was hard in the first half with the opponent's [low] block. But I think the second half was much better with our movement and passes and crosses. And, yeah.

Journalist: What did Sonia [Bompastor] ask of you? I heard her say, especially in the first half, to press pretty high on the pitch.

Carpenter: Yes but I think we weren't connecting well. We were too far apart from each other. But I think the second half was better because we were unified, there was a lot of movement on the wings. I think Kadi[diatou Diani] and I were better in the second half.

Journalist: You said you think things went better in the second half. What was Sonia's speech at halftime to improve the team?

Carpenter: Yes, during half time she asked for better, to do much better in the second half. I think we did that, but we missed a lot of goals, a lot of chances. That's a shame. But it's three points, it's a win. But we'll do better next game and we have Guingamp on Sunday and then the international break. So yeah. It's important to have the three points.

Journalist: So the next Champions League game will be against Brann. Brann won 1-0 tonight. An Australian player scored, Larissa Crummer. Do you know her?

Carpenter: Yes, I know her, she plays as a forward. She's a good player. Brann won again, that's good for her, for the team. It'll be a good game, I think. Both teams have six points.

Journalist: You were saying, the next league game is Sunday at Guingamp. For now the team has had a perfect start to the season. What are your objectives between now and the end of the year?

Carpenter: Continue the good start to the season. [switches to English] We're going to keep playing well, and on Sunday it's important that we [switches back to French] get the three points.

Journalist: Thank you, Ellie, and thank you for having spoken in French.

Carpenter: Thank you!

CAMILLE ABILY OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEW

Journalist: It was important for Lyon to impose themselves again tonight.

Abily: Yes of course, in terms of the results it's important even if you look at the content of the game we can't be satisfied. What was most important was the result and to win against St Polten.

Journalist: Honestly, you constantly impress us. It's 11 games, 11 wins, it's a perfect start to the season. However, there's always an immediately comment of "we could have done better." What frustrated you tonight? What was missing according to you in the performances tonight?

Abily: Technical efficiency. It's true that we have a team with a lot of talent, a lot of qualities, and here we lost too many balls which meant we weren't able to get into any rhythm, we didn't put our opponent into a lot of difficulty in any case. Each time we lost too many balls. It's really frustrating especially when you know the quality of this team.

Journalist: We're already at the 11th game of the season. We're at the end of November. Can we say that, at this point in the season, it's a little difficult physically? Can that be an explanation for a less than stellar performance?

Abily: I hope not. I don't think so. To be honest we're lucky to have a deep roster and we try to rotate players and give playing time to everybody, because they deserve it. So our goal is for them to be good physically until December 22 [RIP that goal]. We can't say that a player has played every game this season so far, so for me that's not an excuse as to why we didn't perform well. I think that's going to happen, but in any case we need to get right back to work and I think the players are just as frustrated as I am, having talked to them.

Timothee: That frustration, Camille, it's basically the trade mark of Olympique Lyonnais. It's not enough to just win. We know the objective for the season is not to beat St Polten, it's to go win the trophies in the finals. Does this frustration come from the fact you made such an impression on the first day and the idea was to continue with that momentum?

Abily: Of course it was to continue. To be honest, the opponent had a lot of - we should give them a lot of credit, because they defended well, they played well. But I think we weren't on the same level we were in Prague. I talked about technical ability but also in terms of efficiency. And you said it really well, Timothee, I think the reason why this Lyon team is honestly at the top for all these years, it's because they have those expectations, and we, the staff, have to have those same expectations.

Coralie: We were talking with Timothee about spontaneity. Did you also feel like it was missing when you were watching from the sidelines?

Abily: Yeah, of course. We weren't making a lot of difference from an individual standpoint. So we know when we play against a low block like that, you need those individual qualities, that ability to draw your direct opponent towards you in order to create space. We did it a little bit more in the second half but in the first case in any case it was lacking too much.

Journalist: A word, Camille, on the next [UWCL] game. It will be at home on December 13 against this Norwegian team, Brann. Two wins, six points. They came from Pot 4, maybe the easiest opponent. And yet it could be the "final" in the group.

Abily: Yeah, I've been following their results. They won against Slavia Prague. So it's good, it shows the team is progressing. Generally speaking, Norwegian teams are quite scrappy and talented. I think the trio - I think we should be ahead and the bottom trio is more or less on the same level, because they only won 2-1 against St Polten. But if we win at home it will already be a big step towards getting the first place first of all, because that's the objective.

Journalist: Obviously we know that last year Lyon didn't get that first place, we had that very complicated quarterfinal against Chelsea. The thought must be at the back of your head. There will probably be Barcelona who will finish first of their group, probably Chelsea, maybe Bayern.

Abily: Chelsea had a draw, Romain, you can't forget that. I think Barcelona has an easier group, they will most likely finish first. But it's pretty close in the other groups and just because a team "should" win it doesn't mean they will. We'll have to follow the results closely.

SELMA BACHA OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEW

Journalist: You are at 17 assists in the Champions League. If we look at the top 5 assists in the history of the Champions League, two - sorry, three of your Lyon teammates are ahead of you. There's Dzsenifer Marozsan who is on top with 29 assists. Amel [Majri] and Eugenie [Le Sommer] aren't very far behind with. But more serious, to be decisive with a pass, I imagine those might be part of your priorities.

Bacha: Yeah. But it's my main quality. I know I deliver those magical crosses to my teammates. But beyond that, thank you to my teammates because they're the ones finishing. In any case, if it can help the team, I'm really proud of that.

Journalist: On a more serious note, how do you work on that? Is it something you focus on, are there individual sessions? We've known your left foot for a long time, but is there still room for improvement? What do you need to work on so that it works correctly?

Bacha: No, yeah, it's something I work on daily. I work on it a lot because I want my crosses to be perfect in every game. So I work a lot with the forwards and it pays off in games. So I'm really, really happy.

Journalist: We often talk about Wendie Renard's height and headers. You decided to switch things up tonight with a player who is a little less tall but just as efficient shall we say. [Bacha starts laughing]

Bacha: Yeah, she [Danielle van de Donk] was really well positioned. I looked up and I - I was concentrated, I saw her, and I lobbed it over so she could place a header despite her small size. But it ended up at the back of the net so I'm really happy for her because before the game, we said to each other that she would score and I would provide the assist.

Journalist: Well there you have it, mission accomplished, Selma. But on a more serious note, 11 games, 11 wins, perfect streak in every competition. Are you on track, if not over performing, with the objectives you set for yourselves at the start of the season?

Bacha: Yeah, but when you're a successful club like we are, you have to set those expectations. The club has expectations and you have to meet them. We have magnificent infrastructures. So this year we want to - we want the team to bulldoze over the opponents. For the moment it's working out pretty well, we're pretty efficient even if today we were lacking in our finishing. We're still the same bulldozer.

Timothee: Exactly, Selma, this lack of efficiency which appears sometimes. How do you as a player explain it? Do you know where it comes from? We see sometimes that you can accomplish everything like against Prague, then there's tonight that's not the case. How do you explain that?

Bacha: We're entering a period where we will be playing a lot of consecutive games. We're starting to feel some tiredness. Beyond that, that's not an excuse, it's on us to play simpler, to stay more focused. We're competitors, so in the first half we were really, really frustrated. In the second half it went a little better. Tiredness is creeping in but it's up to us to do better and it starts with Guingamp on Sunday.

Timothee: In any you are joint best scorer - sorry, joint best assist. You join Kadidiatiou Diani on the right, you're on the left. That's a lot of forwards getting amazing service this season.

Bacha: Yeah, that's good. It shows there is a balance between the left side and the right side, so that gives us some variety in our game. If you look at previous years it mostly came from the left, now it's true we found a balance. So it's good. I'm - we need to continue like this.

SONIA BOMPASTOR OLPLAY POSTGAME INTERVIEW

Journalist: Sonia, first of all, congratulations on the win. Overall, what do you and the staff think of the team showed tonight?

Bompastor: In terms of the end results we're satisfied. Second game, second win, six points, top of the group. In terms of the game itself and the objectives we had set for ourselves, we're moderately satisfied. We know that with regards to the team's performance, we can do much better. But we have to give St Polten credit, who came with a strong desire to defend well, and they did that pretty well. Their goalkeeper made a lot of stops especially in the second half. Certainly we lacked efficiency compared to our previous games. But yeah, we're going to continue working and stay focused on the dynamic that's been in place since the start of the season.

Journalist: What was missing in your game plan tonight, compared to what you wanted to put in place?

Bompastor: We had set several objectives for ourselves. I think what was missing the most was technical efficiency. We were missing an enormous amount of passes, uncharacteristic amount for my players and my team. So it was difficult for our combined play, we weren't close enough to each other either to cause St Polten's block any difficulty. So those are things we need to fix, need to look at it together and rectify it for the upcoming games.

Journalist: That's something the players are aware of as well. We had Selma Bacha who said that choosing a standout player tonight would be complicated.

Bompastor: Yeah. I don't think collectively it was our best game of the season. Individually neither. We saw that it is difficult to perform well individually when the team is playing badly as a whole. But that can happen in football. You know that even if we start every game with the desire to do well, it doesn't always work out that way, we don't perform as well. We need to be able to analyze it well. Despite all that it's still a win. We'll take away the information which will make us perform better in the upcoming games. And move on as well, that's important. There's a game coming up really quickly on Sunday against Guingamp.

Journalist: The performance the team had today, could it be linked to tiredness or fatigue? We're coming up to end of November and there are a lot of consecutive games now.

Bompastor: Yes. We're in a period where we're playing every three days so obviously even if I had the chance to rotate a lot of players, on a mental level it requires a lot of energy. All these games, well, it requires a lot of concentration. When you're an athlete at the top level, it requires an enormous energy. So fatigue won't explain everything but it could be one reason as to why we weren't as good as usual.

Journalist: In terms of the overall results though, perfect streak. Two wins in two games in the Champions League, and a game which could prove to be decisive against Brann, your next opponent in the Champions League. Does it come as a surprise to you to have a team who was in Pot 4 to compete with you on the European scene?

Bompastor: No, no. We really studied our opponents. We also knew that tonight's game would be really different in terms of the context and result from the Slavia [Prague] game. We're up against teams who see how efficient we are and so defensively they set themselves up to make it as difficult for us as possible to be efficient. And Brann is definitely a team who will be competing with us at the top of the table, but this is just the second day. So we need to wait, it's much too early to say anything. I've said it since the beginning of the season, we're really focused on ourselves, we have a lot of quality. We know we're capable of doing some really good things. So yeah. We have time, we're going to really analyze this opponent and try and find the solutions to allow us to start well against Brann.

Journalist: One last question regarding the next game which you brought up earlier, away at Guingamp. What are you expecting in Brittany?

Bompastor: [laughs] I mainly remember last year in the league we drew 0-0 over there. So it's really a team who can cause us some difficulty. I'm obviously expecting a really low block, very compact, and probably also have 5 defenders at the back. So those are contexts we've experienced in our latest games. We're expecting that again against Guingamp.

Journalist: Thank you, Sonia.

[the-firebird69]

There are a few people who are unruly out of line and mean and wrong and we are listening who they are and we are going to send for people to come and get them out and soon too in moments

-Daniel is insisting on bothering our son and he says that our son should live like a slave so we're going to get rid of him he's a f****** moron these people are stupid second it was like a slave and boy these the wrong words to use we do stuff to you morons for that and yeah we're going to get you Emily blunt you're a piece of s*** and you're not attractive person at all by the way you're mostly a retard what you see in the malls what you are these guys do it really stupid he knows he's arguing against practically nothing but boy wow you suck you people suck real bad so I'm going to get you and you're going to burn it that's what he's all about Daniel says and yours that you're a stinking fool anybody in his position deserves money you're you're a freaking idiots will and Bill say it all the time you don't pass he wants to do it as slaves we're not going to do it at all I'm going to mess you up and you don't even notice it you don't notice what he's doing he's killing you you're stupid so get lost

-and we are sending people in

-this is really some sort of asinine thing they do but we didn't take advantage of it it sounds like they're going to be harmful we're going to take him out right now we cannot risk it

-we have other things to announce it's a large list and we need ours on board with it all and to pay attention today we have several things happening that are opening huge cans of worms one of them is is going to see the movie planet of the apes some of which has to do with us they want to try and get stuff to carefully hit us silently and not tell anybody and blame chimpanzees and show them trying to do more stuff and we do understand what they're saying they might have the chimpanzees that are real in their midst and we say this somebody did it to you instead of trying to use it it's a good opportunity I said we're the ones you're hiding from I said no or not so yes you are and you're not hiding let me take your stuff out every time and they keep trying so that's what we're up against this guy I'm getting our son anything however you might be tricked into it and forced into it and that is the important part it's not their Free Will doing it or their plan but the empire makes him do it and we do and minorities and it does work and they are destroying themselves too and they pretty much really should.

-there's a lot of things on the docket to do today however there are some really huge things that will affect how the day goes one of them is our son is having some trouble because of sugar from the protein mix is throwing the protein mix away and he's trying to fix it and we foresee a day of trouble coming up so trying to fix it right now

-so we're trying to give an assist and it's working at least he has the stuff with him and we're going to hope for the best

-certain other things happening he didn't get enough rest well he got 8 hours and he said the first three or were deep and we understood that he was out like a light which is really good I'm trying to recuperate and did do some decent food very decent so that's good it is toughier it's tough to recuperate it's tough to get over stupid things but he's trying

-we have a couple more points we are going to war with people who are out of control and there's a bunch and we have to express that it's necessary we're also fighting for our son as you are constantly messing with him here and you really need to leave groups and your diminishing and will post the numbers:

-the Moreland the more lock in Tallahassee are fluctuating from 3 to 5% and then from 5:00 to 3%, and people go in and they don't come out and there is a core that is getting eroded by this function

-there's other groups that are doing it and are depleting themselves and they're actually more lock fighting morlock and it's Trump and he wants to be governor and you can see it and he's going to try and use alligator to hit them and he ends up hitting a lot of bja we're trying to investigate the eye of Horace that's what it's called

-there's a large number of people who are migrating to Tampa is not true that area has about 10% more lock and it goes down to seven or eight percent and then up to 10 and that process is eroding your presence in Florida as is it is with Gainesville and it's about the same number

-Orlando is a bit different there are 10 or 15% in a fluctuates but it's a serious amount of erosion every day it's about 2% of Florida that's lost there today will be 3% or more

-you people are so unfriendly to each other and so nasty and you laugh at our son when he says it that we need you out permanently and we need law enforcement here what's happening up north down to Tampa even Sarasota is that three groups are replacing you that have more common sense at this time right now they have a problem with you because of Saturn and other things and they believe that the tie is slowly breaking and that the comet empire will stand inside and that's it and it's becoming a reality they say from information they're getting and soon it will go dark so they know what time it is and you're in the way so they're moving down to Sarasota which is fluctuating from 15 to 20% of morlock and that's all of them in each case including the pseudo empire they do not have 40% here they're trying to get you to attack the max and you were a little and it made a lot worse

-Miami is a different situation all of the morlock and by the way the numbers above include minority morlock, are getting dissolved they were at large 30% yesterday and now they're 20% and dwindling fast and getting pushed out completely and the clones are too they're part of that number and our son says how in the world are they staying in Tallahassee with 3% and we know how they're all over the world threatening for that job and we expect them to be a 20% by the end of the day or even lower and fort Myers is seeking to 20% right now and by the end of the day 15% or less and it will be felt here these people will start evacuating again and all over Florida it will increase now there's an evacuation on approximately three to four percent out of roughly 15% and it's that way because Southwest Florida is heavily populated by comparison yes it's the first most dense area the second is Orlando no Miami believe it or not and it's going down

-there's other things happening they keep asking her son if he wants to work he keeps saying you're not really fitting the bill they keep saying we know what it is so you can say no you don't and he keeps saying this is what I do or last week and you're putting them in there on purpose to screw around with me and they say that he's saying it out loud what do I do and they say nothing and she's in the right thing but she's understanding that they're cutting their eyes with him and they're getting the hell out and they're going to go die unless their choice she says and she'll have to go with him then she says nobody talks to me that way and then she hears life is very fragile one falling object in your dead meat I don't treat people like you do because I don't feel like getting hurt and she says you're saying things you shouldn't just don't have any say things don't have me say things don't have me say things. So she got in a big fight and you're finding who's having you're finding those who are having him say stuff

-we have a few more things but this is huge

Thor Freya

Olympus

We kind of getting a little head of things and the morelock are demanding it and we're the ones moving in not Max and I'm suicidal and running because of that what's true is we're not going to cut the mustard and these three teams are going to take over but a skeleton cruise going to be here and I don't want to be here

Daniel

It is happening that way the numbers are abysmal and we're shrinking too and these guys are not organized they don't take over in the area like people do so they're not holding it my friend noticed it you need the police you need other stuff like that and it's just not happening and turned into this mess that was in the Midwest I told him what to do and not to do it that way and they did and they didn't listen now we're going to be nobody so I'm trying to build up forces somehow and I need it and my guys need it and other people are not willing to work with me I can't stand it anymore you guys are crap and he needs help and stuff might be who I am and I doubt it you have a problem with me all the time so it sucks so anyways I tried real hard and you my own children won't listen to logic and you don't understand what we're saying it's quite simple if you run off and you fight this it is without anybody with time you will die

Mac daddy

We just see what you're saying in the movie dune it's a nightmare everybody's going every which way in the same building and he wants to avoid that heinous crap that we're doing and we can't seem to stop doing it

Daniel

You have every right to die Daniel but you don't have a right to harm me or harass me or take from me or harass me any of it is how you're dying same with the other idiots and you're too stupid to see it and the Max reposited and now you're going into a spiral which they want to I'll pitiful that you can't tell who it is and why after so many years of hearing it and you putting me in Jeopardy by me saying it I mean real evidence You're pitiful get out go suck an egg

Zues I said that last part and a bunch of the rest of it too Hera

I guess something I probably won't come back or it's going to be rough and he says yeah that's what everybody is saying and I want to sit here and die like my clan and I can see them going and it's gross so go out there I know I f*** somebody up like the empire and I'll try and do it by being them

Daniel

He wants to deus ex machina so he can do that and that's what we're discovering in these weasels and people like you're saying it because they're so damn annoying and don't do anything right on purpose it's also annoying getting you up there is a chore and you're right it's this stuff's over and we got to get you some protection and other people's other people do too will and Bill needed they need it badacs

Macs

Olympus

[nalu4emily]

Sickly Sweet

This little short came about while I was looking for writing prompts. The ones I used for this were "I feel thoroughly disgusting." "We need to get you into a different shirt, you've sweat through that one." and "Is that my shirt? Looks like I'm gonna have to burn it now that you've contaminated it!"

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the NALU fluffiness!

x

She was dying.

Well, not exactly... But damn, did she feel terrible.

She wasn't sure when it'd happened; in the guild? Out on a mission? Who knows?

Whatever sickness this was, it was bad. Her body ached like she'd been beaten with a stick over and over again, and her heart pounded so loudly it felt like it might blow through her rib cage. The throbbing headache that travelled from her face to the back of her neck, that burned her eyes like a really bad hangover, seemed to only get worse if she tried to move. And that wasn't even the start of it.

She lay there, under thick blankets piled high on top of her shivering self in a bid to warm up, or 'sweat it out' as she'd heard others say, but it was no use. Hours she'd laid there feeling too hot and then too cold; too sleepy but too restless to allow herself the rest she so desperately needed.

What she wouldn't give for just a bit of respite? To be able to fall asleep and give her body that extra time to recuperate.

No… the girl knew what she needed, there was only one thing for it, and that was Wendy.

The young mage could heal her in a heartbeat, then she'd be free to go about her day—probably find Natsu, and go on another mission or whatever.

"Lucy?"

Speak of the devil.

"Luce… Whatcha doing under all that? You tryna hide from someone?"

When had he sneaked in? She hadn't heard the window go. Then again, she could hear barely anything under the thumping of her own pulse in her ears.

This was so bothersome. She really didn't have the strength to entertain guests today, let alone one like Natsu. Sleep was her main objective right now.

"Lucy, I-" He gasped suddenly, whipping back the covers without warning, "Whoa-!"

"H-Hey! Give them back!" Trying to shout, her throat simply wouldn't allow the sound to come out. She'd croaked instead, using the tiny amount of strength she had left to yank the duvets back over her form, shuddering from the gust it'd created.

Shocked by just how sickly his partner was, Natsu stared wide eyed for a moment at the heap of shaking blankets in front of him. He'd only popped in to see why she hadn't been to the guild, and now it was all too clear, "Luce, you look awful…"

"G-Gee, thanks Natsu. Maybe it's because I feel awful?" She bit back, feeling irritable as well as everything else now.

Placing his hands on his hips, with eyes never leaving the bed, he listened in to the soft whimpers and grunts escaping her every breath, "Ya know, if you've got a fever, covering yourself like that is only going to make it worse." He knew he was treading a thin line, but he didn't care.

"I-I'm cold…"

"But your body isn't, I can feel the heat from here. You're probably sweating up a storm in there." He wanted to help, really, only Lucy had to let him first, and she could be pretty darn stubborn when she wanted, "And that's not good for anybody that's sick."

He was right, she knew that, but the mere thought of exposing her goose pimpled flesh to the open air made her teeth chatter even harder.

"Come on, Luce, let me help. You wanna feel better right?" Ever so carefully, he hooked his fingers under the blankets again, and slowly eased them upwards, his voice going from muffled to clear as he peeked in on the jittery girl. Meeting no resistance, he continued to peel it back, revealing the blonde that'd huddled in like a foetus to save some of the warmth she'd built up, "You're drenched!"

Opening her dry eyes for the first time since he'd got there, she blearily looked up at him, the concern etched into his face making her feel even more vulnerable, "I… I don't feel well, Natsu."

"I know you don't, Luce. But it's gonna be alright, because I'll look after you." He smiled at her, with that warm, comforting grin she'd seen so many times, and it filled her with reassurance, "Can you sit up? I'm sure laying in a wet bed is no fun…"

It wasn't, now that Lucy thought about it. In fact, it was incredibly uncomfortable and that only made her feel worse. Holding onto her throbbing head, she eased herself up onto her butt, her body feeling weaker than it had done in some time and leant herself against the headboard.

Taking a few sips of the water that Natsu had given her, she let the cool liquid glide down her pin-like throat, soothing it's painful prickle.

"Thanks Natsu." She breathed heavily, "Ugh… I feel thoroughly disgusting..." She wasn't exaggerating either, her body was soaked through, having seeped onto her clothes, keeping her skin damp and unbearably cold.

"We need to get you into a different shirt, you've sweat through that one." The fire mage said, walking over to the dresser, and pulling a random top from it to give to her, "Here, at least it'll be dry."

She took it from him and grimaced, barely believing what she was about to ask of her best friend, "I-I, um… C-Can you help me put it on? I don't have the energy…" Her blush reached the tips of her ears, unable to look at the boy, who, seemed more than willing to assist.

"Sure thing! Only, you can't hit me for looking." A 'Lucy punch' hurt, and this time it wouldn't be his fault.

"I-I won't…" Her eyes never quite meeting his, too shy, too embarrassed by what she'd asked him to do… Drunk Lucy never seemed to have this problem.

Satisfied that he wouldn't be getting a foot to the face, he gently lifted her saturated top above her head, careful to keep his eyes anywhere but her chest. Not that he even got a chance—her hands quickly came up to shield them from his view, and a pang of disappointment hit him straight in the gut.

"I dunno why you're covering yourself. It's not like I ain't seen it before." He murmured, grabbing the clean shirt to pull over her head, "Don't you trust me?"

"O-Of course… I just- I guess it's just a habit." She shrugged, releasing herself to push her arms through the sleeves, his eyes now focused solely on hers, making her heart beat for an entirely different reason this time.

"If you say so." He glanced down, glad to see Lucy in something loose and dry, when he paused, head tilting to the side, "Wait, isn't that-?" Cocking his brow, he marvelled at the shirt sitting so nicely around the blonde's body, smirking up at her with that daring face of his.

"What? What is it?"

"Isn't that my shirt?" He asked, wondering what the hell it was doing folded so neatly in Lucy's drawers—her pyjama drawer to be exact, "Care to explain, Lucy?" Her name drooled off his tongue, his voice laced with tease.

"O-Oh, um… w-well, it kinda… ya know…" Her face grew redder by the second, with his eyes piercing into her very soul.

Busted!

He'd wondered where that'd gone.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to burn it now that you've contaminated it!" He sniggered, earning a very unimpressed glare from the celestial mage.

"That's a big word coming from a guy that leaves his clothes in other people's houses!" She retorted, the corners of her lips raising as they both broke out into laughter.

"Fine, I guess you can keep it…" He said, placing a wet cloth on her forehead to cool her flushed face down.

"Like I was gonna give it back!" She chuckled again, feeling a new warmth seeping into her rattling bones, a warmth that always accompanied the dragon slayer. Pulling the boy up onto the bed, she laid herself down onto his chest and finally sighed in relief, "Thanks, Natsu. You always know how to make me feel… better..."

He cuddled close, smiling as she began to drift off, glad he'd been able to make her feel more comfortable at least, "Anytime, Luce!"

Her aches and pains were forgotten, and her shivers began to ease as she let the familiarity of Natsu's comforting presence take her to a place of peace and calm.

Maybe, she didn't need Wendy after all?

Thanks for reading! 

[some-little-infamy]

The Power of Flowers

Flufftober Day 19: Flowers (Read on AO3) 

Eddie sees Buck’s car pull up before he gets the entirely unnecessary ‘I’m here’ text that follows, or hears the steps leading to the door before the knock sounds. They have a standing date night Tuesdays at 6:00 when they’re both off duty, their last shift ending in the early morning hours to give both of them the day to rest and recuperate a bit.

At first, Eddie was afraid that the last thing either of them would want after spending all of their long work hours together would be to spend so many of their non-working hours together, but that hasn’t been the case at all. Definitely a good sign.

As is the bouquet of flowers that greet him when he tells Christopher he’ll be right back and goes to open the door. It’s a beautiful arrangement, the flowers so large they obscure most of Buck’s face as he holds them out for Eddie to take.

“What’s this for?” Eddie asks, his mind already wandering to if he has a vase and where the hell it might be. He can’t remember the last time he had flowers to display that he hadn’t bought for someone.

Buck shrugs. “Just because. Do you like them?”

“I love them,” Eddie admits honestly. And he does - he can’t remember if he ever mentioned it, or if Buck just knows - but Eddie loves colorful arrangements like this.

“You got flowers?” Christopher’s voice sounds from behind him, because no matter how many times Eddie tells him to just wait at the table he never listens, always too eager to come and greet Buck as well. “But flowers are for girls.”

Eddie frowns slightly, because that definitely sounds like the sort of thing a kid hears once at school and just absorbs and repeats. He’s about to say something but Buck beats him to it.

“No way,” Buck says, pulling one of the flowers out of the bundle and tucking it behind Christopher’s ear where it’s way too big and definitely isn’t going to stay for more than a few seconds. “Flowers are definitely for everyone! You can give them to someone who’s having a bad day, or someone you like just to say you’re thinking about them.”

“Or someone you looooooove,” Christopher sing-songs the word, giggling.

“Definitely a person you love,” Buck confirms, crossing over to Eddie to give him a quick kiss.

Eddie, who actually had a pretty good day, feels his heart do a little flutter at the fact that Buck stopped to get him flowers just because he was thinking of him. They’ve been dating for a few months now and he should be used to things like this, but Buck never ceases to surprise him in all the best ways.

“Alright you two, let’s get these in some water then get dinner out of the oven before it burns.”

---

Two weeks later is one of the worst shifts Eddie’s ever worked with the 118. It was one wrong turn after another, mostly things out of their control, but a few personal errors along the way from all of them that he’s sure everyone is beating themselves up over.

Buck included.

“I know we have date night, but I just don’t have it in me today. Not after…” Buck trails off, and while Eddie wishes he wouldn’t isolate himself when he’s upset he knows better than to push it.

“I know,” Eddie says. “It’s fine.” It isn’t really fine, but Buck needs support more than he needs a guilt trip today. “Call if you need anything, or if you change your mind, alright?”

When he picks Christopher up from school the first words out of his son’s mouth are about how excited he is to see Buck later.

“Sorry Chris, Buck isn’t going to make it today,” Eddie says.

Christopher’s face immediately falls. “Why not?”

“He’s just having a bad day and he’s going to rest at home, that’s all,” Eddie explains.

There’s a slight pause before Christopher asks, “Can we stop at the store?”

“For what?”

“To get Buck flowers to make his bad day better,” Christopher says, as if it should be the most obvious thing in the world.

Eddie’s heart melts at the simple sincerity of the desire to bring Buck flowers to cheer him up.

“You know what, that’s a great idea. Of course we can,” Eddie agrees, because how can he not?!

Christopher spends twenty minutes at the store picking the ‘perfect flowers’, and Eddie shoots Buck a quick warning text that they’re going to be swinging by on their way home. When Buck tries to argue Eddie says that Christopher has something for him, which ends any argument then and there.

Buck is about as weak to Christopher’s wishes as Eddie is… probably more so, if he’s being honest.

Eddie helps Christopher out of the car with the flowers, rings Buck’s doorbell, and waits. When Buck answers it any sign of a bad day is gone from his face at the sight of Christopher standing there with a bouquet of flowers.

“Dad said you were having a bad day, so I wanted to bring you these!” Christopher exclaims. “Because I was thinking about you, and I love you,” he tacks on to show he remembers exactly what Buck said the other week about giving flowers.

“That’s really nice of you,” Buck says, taking the flowers from Christopher and spending a few seconds to really look them over and admire them. “I love you too. These really help.”

“C’mon Chris, let’s head home and let Buck rest up-”

“Actually,” Buck says, turning his attention to Eddie. “If you don’t mind waiting a few minutes… maybe I could come with?”

“Are you sure?” Eddie asks, unable to keep the eagerness from his voice even as he gives Buck a chance to change his mind.

“Yeah,” Buck says with a small smile. “I think I could use the company after all. If that’s alright?”

As if there’s any universe in which Eddie will say no to more time with Buck, especially on a day they could both use a little extra comfort.

“Always,” Eddie agrees easily. “Take your time, we’ll be right here.”

[daimonhalos]

Lonely together

Part of Skephalo week! → Day 4 – Immortality

Read on Ao3!

Word Count: 644

Characters: BadBoyHalo, Skeppy

Pairing(s): Skephalo (again, up to interpretation)

Warning(s): Death mention (tell me if I missed any)

Summary: All things come to an end, eventually. When it comes to connections, though, it's harder to let them go; at the same time, when you're presented with an escape route, as dangerous as it could sound, it feels like the perfect solution to barge in.

A/N: Alternatively, how Skeppy and Bad linked their souls together so they could always be friends- Anyway, yes I missed a day because small burn-out, but I'll recuperate don't worry. This one is pretty short in sight of a much bigger work I want to begin today! Hope you like it regardless. ♥

✾

❝ We're never gonna be the same as we've been before.

A city burned down to ashes, memories lost in vain.

It's only gonna make us stronger, as we heal the pain. ❞

Some may have said Aristophanes had been close. Not right, but misguidedly wrong.

Humans and humanoids alike had never been conjoined beings in the ancient times, what Zeus had been said to be wary of to the point of punishment.

The concept had been almost correct, but those beings had been more of an arriving point rather than a starting one. Absolutely abstract, yet still somewhat concrete: it was called soul binding, one would keep the other's soul protected within their own, while the other provided external protection to maintain each other safe.

In a way, the two would share their existence, quite like Aristophanes' androgynous being, while keeping separated bodies.

Bad remembered how much thought he had pressured Skeppy to put into that, before choosing to briskly dive into it; countless were the times in which his immortality had been brought up, occasionally killing the mood in between conversations. There were also the times in which his friend had been concerned about not doing enough in their friendship, constantly being the one kept safe, the one whose life could've flickered out in a moment, as simple as blowing the flame away on a candle.

So, when Skeppy had looked into soul binding, Bad had been cautious. As much as it granted immortality to both that way and would've solved the problem, was he really ready for all the side effects that came with it? All the people he would've eventually lost, again and again. The catastrophes he would have to brush off in the long run.

There was only one thing that had made Skeppy ponder.

« Still … my form can still bear huge amounts of pain and attacks with ease, while your body needs to keep functioning. It's kind of like when you keep something in a chest. If you break the chest, what's inside will fall out, maybe disperse. »

« So … » he had begun, grasping the concept. « You're saying I can still die? »

Bad had nodded. « Not by natural causes, but if your heart stops, you do. » he hesitated, looking to the side. « And … »

« And? »

« Well … since my soul would be attached to your body, if you die, it doesn't return to me. I die too, or simply stop existing, demons work in a complicated way. »

That had kept him at bay; on one hand, they could have sort of been together both in life and death, on the other he would've never let himself live it down if he were to be the cause of Bad's disappearance, not even if Bad himself didn't mind the little detail.

Eventually, his will grew stronger than his fears: if that had meant he would've needed to take care of himself better, he could have welcomed such an upgrade in his life.

When it happened, it seemed like a blur, like something had just shifted to the left and everything that came with it was bit by bit unravelled before Skeppy's eyes. So the two roamed worlds and time, side by side, always in the corner of stories and myths, depicted in the background of the most breathtaking paintings, always present, yet distant, beaming in each other's company first and foremost.

Bad had looked back at his lifetime, at the first few centuries in which he had tried his best not to make one too many attachments, not to hurt way more than he already had the year before the one he was in each time, welcoming loneliness with each person that left him. He fell in the trap each time, though, when kindhearted friends offered their love.

He was somewhere else now, still lost in space and time, looking at his life-long friend play with their umpteenth newly found pet.

Immortal loneliness had never been more fulfilling.

[rjhpandapaws]

A Cup of Something Better

Ch 10: Down to the Wire

This was it, the week that had been two years in the making, his last finals week as a gen ed student. Assuming he passed all his tests, he would be able to take the nurses exam the following Friday. If he passed that he be enrolled into the nursing program for the fall semester. Five tests over three days, not the worst test load that he'd dealt with. The fact that they were between five and eleven at night was a pain in the ass.

He'd asked for the week off from the cafe so he could have more time to study. Some of the time he spent studying was also spent at the cafe, he preferred the idle chatter over the silence of his apartment.

Connor was spending the morning at the cafe again, going over calculus today. He had an Iced Americano that was helping to keep him concentrated. He'd had a few late nights that he was beginning to feel the effects of. His first set of tests was tonight, calculus and art history. Tomorrow was biology and mythology. The day after being his sociology final. Hank thankfully didn't have a final for his class so Connor had a chance to recuperate before his nurses exam.

He finished the problem he was working on and sat back rubbing at his face to try and wake up more. He needed to focus. He took another drink of his coffee and looked around the cafe, it was almost empty. As one would expect at ten in the morning on a Monday. He finished his coffee and figured he could use the break to order another drink. Hopefully he'd be more awake afterward.

He headed for the counter and ordered his usual before heading back to the table. Refueled and somewhat ready to go again, he sat back down and got back to work.

Connor woke up sometime later to North knocking on the table. He looked up to find that it wasn’t North, but Hank, though the red haired she-devil was behind the counter laughing.

“So, uh, North asked me to bring you this.” Hank said after a moment, setting the bigger of the two cups on the table, “she also said that knocking on the table would wake you up.”

“Thanks.” Connor took the cup and yawned, “you can sit down if you want. I’m just studying.”

Hank chuckled as he took a seat, “planning on learning through osmosis? I was lead to believe you had to be awake in order to study properly.”

Connor rolled his eyes as he took a drink from what turned out to be a large cup filled with just espresso shots, “I’ll do whatever works at this point.” He covered a yawn and leaned forward, “how do you like having the week off? Getting any writing done?”

Hank laughed as Connor got back to work on his calculus, “I’ve gotten a couple of chapters into my manuscript and started a couple of short stories.”

Connor took another drink from his cup, “you’re planning to release another collection then?” He yawned, “how is Sumo doing?”

When Connor looked up Hank was looking at him with a concerned expression. HIs brow was furrowed and his sky blue eyes were clouded over with worry. Connor knew that he looked rough but he was pretty sure he wasn’t bad enough to warrant that level of concern.

“Sumo is doing fine.” Hank leaned forward and rested his forearms on the table, “can you answer something for me Connor?”

“Hmm?” Connor sat up from where he had been slouching into his textbook again, “what’s up?”

“How many days has it been since you’ve gotten a full night’s rest?” Hank watched as he took another drink of his ‘coffee’.

“Today is Monday so...” He counted back on his fingers, muttering the days of the week under his breath, “Saturday, I think. Why?”

Hank sighed, and the sound was pure disappointment, something that if it hadn’t been directed at Connor would have impressed him, “Since you’re the one of us going into nursing, I feel like I shouldn’t have to tell you what’s wrong with that Connor. Do me a favor and get some rest. You can’t keep going like this.”

“I sleep two hours before classes. I’ve increased my calorie intake and added more caffeine into the mix as well.” He stumbled over his words as he yawned again, “five hour energy and espresso have been life savers for me.”

“Connor.” Hank groaned, “I was in college too, so I can’t argue with you, but try and get at least get four hours today alright?” He put a hand up when Connor opened his mouth to argue, “I know your nurses exam is important to you Con, but what happens if you burn out before then? You’ll have to wait a whole semester to take it again.”

In theory Connor knew him to be correct, but he had so many tests and he wanted to make sure that he was ready, “I just don’t want to fail Hank, if I can’t pass these then I won’t even be taking the nurses exam.”

Connor could feel tears pooling behind his eyes from the lack of sleep as well as the stress. The nickname made Connor give a watery smile as he rubbed at his face trying to collect himself.

“Hey now, don’t cry.” Hank reached out and squeezed his wrist reassuringly, “I’ve gotten to see you at work Con, you’ve got these tests in the bag. Go home, get some rest.”

Connor let out a wet laugh and wiped his eyes with his free hand. After another reassuring squeeze Hank let go of his wrist and Connor began packing up his things and putting them back in his bag not quite managing to bite back another yawn. He was starting to think no amount of coffee was gonna help this. With everything packed he sat back and rubbed at his face again hoping to wake up a little more.

“Alright.” Connor said before he drank more of his coffee, “time to go home and nap I guess. Sorry you had to wake me.”

Hank chuckled, “Its no problem. Do you need a ride? The weather looks like its going to take a turn for the worse.”

Connor looked out the windows and despite it being early afternoon apparently, the sky was almost black and the wind was howling through the streets, “thanks, but I’ll just get a cab.”

Hank nodded and stood. They walked out together and parted ways at the parking lot with a wave. Connor hailed a cab and checked his phone which had been vibrating consistently since Hank had stood up. There were several new messages in the coffee shop group chat, probably because he had been crying.

The Coffee Crew:

Northern_Lights: Aww, you two are so cute together

Northern_Lights: Why are you crying?

Northern_Lights: Is it his fault? I’ll kick his ass if I have to

Northern_Lights: Holding hands?

Northern_Lights: You’re good then?

Northern_Lights: Connor?

RunawayArkait: North, everything is fine.

SimonSays: Are you sure? We saw you cry

RunawayArkait: I haven’t been sleeping and the stress from finals got to me

RunawayArkait: Hank kind of gave me a pep talk is all

SimonSays: Aww his name is Hank, that’s fitting

Northern_Lights: That had better been all. Or I will fight him.

RunawayArkait: It’s fine North. I’m gonna get some sleep then get to class

Northern_Lights: Sleep well

SimonSays: You got this!

Connor smiled at his phone as he paid and got out of the cab. He walked up to his apartment and set an alarm for a half hour before he needed to leave. He set his backpack by the door and went to change into pyjamas. Connor was still fighting off the embarrassment from having cried in front of Hank, if he needed to sleep anything off it was that. Hank probably found him to be weak and pathetic for having cried ever a few tests. Whatever chance, if he’d even had one, was gone.

He sighed and rubbed at his face again and climbed into bed, double checking that his alarm was on and also at full volume. He plugged his phone in and rolled over falling asleep almost instantly. When his alarm went off he hadn’t moved. The song blared to life yanking Connor violently back into consciousness. He groaned, sat up, and rubbed the sleep from his eyes He turned off the alarm and checked his phone. He had quite a few messages.

The Family Feud:

Sixty-Second-Set: You’ve got this Connor!

UnluckyNine: You’ll be a nurse in no time

RunawayArkait: Thank you

The Coffee Crew:

Northern_Lights: Good luck college boy!

SimonSays: Don’t worry alright? You’re a genius

What.Josh.Does: See you in calculus. Who ever scores the lowest buys drinks on Friday

RunawayArkait: Thanks guys. You’re on Josh.

Made-By_Markus messaged you!

Made-By_Markus: Good luck Connor!

RunawayArkait: Thank you Markus.

Connor dressed in his day clothes again and made a pot of coffee. Travel mug filled, he grabbed his bag and headed for the door. He pulled up his hood as he got to the parking lot since the storm picked up since his nap. He walked toward the road and caught a cab to head to the university. On the ride over he pulled out the notes he had taken for his calculus class and got in some last minute studying.

He arrived early and made his way to the Math and Science building. Josh was waiting at one of the hallway tables and waved Connor over. There were two paper Hand Brewed Hope cups on the table, when Connor took his seat Josh slid one over to him.

“Figured you could use the pick me up.” Connor took a drink of what turned out to be Chai Tea with cinnamon and nutmeg as Josh spoke, “I know finals week is rough on you.”

Connor gave a dry chuckle, “It’s just stressful, and even more than usual this time because of the nurses exam.” He sighed softly, “You had tow tests earlier today. How do you think you did?”

He was distracting himself, but thankfully Josh let him, “Good. I was more confident for my philosophy exam than I was for chemistry, but it is what it is. Once I finish this up I’ll get to move on to student teaching. Which I’m looking forward to.”

Connor smiled, Josh was excited to becoming a teacher. He was going to be missed at the cafe but he would have more fun as a teacher, “You’ll be great at it. Those kids are going to adore you.”

Josh beamed at him and Connor took another drink from his tea, “I’m gonna miss the cafe though.”

“We’re gonna miss you too.” Connor said kindly, “I’m sorry that I can’t join you guys this weekend but I’m going to be getting ready for my nurses exam.”

“It’s alright Connor. We know how much this means to you, so no one is holding it against you.” Josh responded with a gentle smile.

When it came time to, they grabbed their things and headed for class. Josh gave Connor’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze before he headed for his seat at the back of the class.  Connor headed for his as well, letting out a shaky sigh. He had an ‘A’ in this class, he could handle one last test. Probably.

The two hour test block seemed to crawl by. He fell into routine, solving the problems as he went and then checking them over when he had finished. Then, just to be sure, he checked them again. With a half hour left in the test block he grabbed his things, turned in his completed exam, and made his way to building one to study for his art history final. Having found a bench to sit at and go over his notes, he sent a few messages.

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: Calculus is done, just Art History left

RunawayArkait: Just finished calculus

UnluckyNine: Good job! You’ve got this one in the bag too

Sixty-Second-Set: Look at you go!

SimonSays: Bet you nailed it

Northern_Lights: Nicely done, you beat Josh

_

RunawayArkait: Calculus is done

Made-By_Markus: Congratulations Connor!

Connor was smiling as he put his phone away as he put his phone away and began to study, wanting to be as prepared as possible for the final. He packed up when the door to the lecture hall opened. When the class had emptied he took his seat and got ready for his exam.

This two hour block went by a little. Though that was probably because he had the confidence of having finished one already. When he finished this one he could go home and sleep for a couple hours before he got back to studying. This final took him a little longer but he finished it with ten minutes to spare. If he napped in the cab he could spend even more time studying. He probably wouldn’t though, he hated sleeping in cars. He sent messages as he headed out.

The Family Feud: 

RunawayArkait: Done for the night

UnluckyNine: Nice. Now you can get some rest

The Coffee Crew:

Sixty-Second-Set: You’ll be a nurse in no time

_

RunawayArkait: First day of finals is over

What.Josh.Does: Congrats! Meet me at building 27 and I’ll give you a ride home

SimonSays: Three more to go, you’ve got this

Northern_Lights: You’re doing great

@Made-By_Markus

RunawayArkait: Thanks. I’ll be there soon Josh

_

RunawayArkait: One night down, two to go

Made-By_Markus: Don’t forget to get some rest.

Tuesday morning found him back at the cafe, is biology textbook as well as the semester’s notes spread over the table. He’d been at this since about midnight; rotating between biology, mythology, sociology, and subjects that would be covered on the nurses exam. His travel mug still had some coffee in it so he hadn’t bought a drink yet and he also had a couple of five hour energy shots in his bag if needed them. He figured he would, because despite the extra sleep he had gotten yesterday, Connor could still feel exhaustion hanging off of him.

After a couple hours he switched from biology to mythology when his concentration started to wane. When that didn’t work he grabbed a five hour energy bottle and got in line to order. He tossed the bottle between his hands without looking at it, occasionally tossing it straight up only to catch it and start the cycle over again. He had put it back in his university sweatshirt pocket by the time it was his turn to order. He was ordering a drink that North had made up that wasn’t on the menu, so he said it out loud.

“I’ll take a large Due North, Simon.” Connor said around a yawn and Simon looked at him with concern.

“You do know that drink is basically just straight espresso with a couple pumps of chocolate syrup right?” Simon was typing the drink in anyway, “with how much coffee you drink in a day, I’m worried you might vibrate out of existence.” 

“I’ll be fine Simon,” Connor said as he paid for his drink, “I just need a little extra help staying awake today is all.”

“If you’re sure Connor,” Simon said as he handed the cup off to Josh who looked at it with worry.

While he stood in the crowd to wait out his drink he got out his lucky quarter and began to toss it between his hands. He would stop and roll it over is knuckles, toss it straight up, catch it and then start over. On the third pass his drink was called, he pocketed the coin as he walked up to the counter. He thanked Josh and took his drink. When he got back to the table he took the lid off of the cup and added the energy shot, stirring it with the straw so it would mix in. He put the lid on and took a drink when he finished. If the sheer amount of caffeine didn’t keep him awake, the taste probably would.

Connor was surprised that he actually finished the monstrosity that North had created. He’d moved on from mythology to sociology, and despite all of the caffeine pumping through his body, he could still feel himself fading. He knew he couldn’t go up for another coffee so soon after pumping so much espresso into himself, Simon wouldn’t let him. So he would just have to tough it out. He leaned more into his notes, resting his arms on the table.

He woke up to talking, “North, why are you drawing on him?”

“Because, he fell asleep and he knows the rules.” Came North’s reply, and now that Connor was slightly more coherent, he could feel something moving against his face. He opened his eyes with a tired groan and whatever had been on his face was yanked away. North laughed, “Shit.”

“Morning Sunshine.” Hank said with an amused smile as Connor sat up, “how is your studying going? I can see you’re trying that learning by osmosis thing again.”

He gave Hank a tired smile as North laughed, “it seemed to work well enough yesterday.”

“Alright Point Dexter, go wash the dicks off your face. I’ll have another Due North for you when you get back out.” North said as she pulled Connor to his feet.

As Connor made his way to the bathroom to clean his face North retreated back behind the counter. He checked the mirror to find that, yes, North had actually drawn cartoon dicks of various sizes along the left side of his face and a detailed shooting star down the side of his neck, He wet a paper towel and started rubbing at his face, glad that they didn’t use permanent marker to write on the cups.

With all the marker washed off his face and neck Connor went back to the table to find Hank had settled in and gotten to work on his laptop. As promised there was another large Due North beside his sociology notes. He sat down and gave Hank a tired half smile.

“So why was North drawing on your face?” Hank asked as he looked up from his typing, “she said something about rules.”

“Yeah.” Connor laughed rubbing at the back of his neck, “the first time you fall asleep in public is a freebie, after that whoever catches you gets to draw on your face. Either she caught me, or Simon chickened out again.”

“So you fall asleep while out and about pretty often then?” Was Hank’s follow up as he watched Connor get out his biology textbook.

“Sometimes,” he said with a casual shrug, “usually during midterms or finals week when I spend most of my time studying.”

“Your nap yesterday was your freebie then?” Hank’s attention was returning to his work, as was Connor’s.

“Probably, or your timing saved me.” With that the conversation fell away to be replaced with the clicking of a keyboard and the occasional turning pf a page.

It was a few hours later when Hank stood, “I’m gonna go get another drink. Do you want anything?”

Connor looked up from his notes, “A Chai Tea please. Thank you Hank.”

“No problem kid.” He said as he headed for the counter.

Connor put his biology book away and got out what he needed for mythology. He had about two hours until he needed to leave for the university. Time to concentrate on his test subjects. He sat back and stretched, his back popped like a line of fire crackers since this was the first time he had moved in a few hours.

By the time Hank got back with the drinks, Connor was once again absorbed in his work and jumped when a paper cup came into his line of sight. Hank laughed as he sat down.

“Anyone ever tell you that you’ve got tunnel vision Con?” He remarked with a laugh, “I called your name three times before I gave up.”

There was that nickname again and the bubbling warmth that came with it. Connor was fighting not to grin like an idiot when he spoke, “A few times. Sorry though, I wasn’t trying to ignore you.”

Hank chuckled as he got back to work, “I get the same way when I work sometimes too. Don’t worry.”

“After tonight I’ll at least be getting my sleep schedule back,” Connor said as a way of making conversation, “I just have sociology tomorrow and then I can pace myself for the nurses exam.”

“North won’t be able to draw on your face anymore,” Hank laughed, “but honestly, I’m glad you’ll be catching up on your rest.”

“I’m honestly just looking forward to getting back to my normal work schedule.” Hank gaped at him.

“Connor, do you ever take time off?” He asked, worry lining his voice.

“Yeah. When I’m sick, for finals week, and whenever Silas has a performance that’s within travelling distance. Why?” Connor asked with a tilt of his head.

Hank shook his head, “Let me rephrase that. Do you ever take time off for yourself Connor?”

“Well no. But I don’t need to, I’m happy.”

Hank sighed and leaned forward resting his forearms on the table on either side of his laptop, “Connor are you working this weekend?”

“No. I have-”

“Great. You’re gonna meet me here at noon on Saturday. I’m going to bring you to my place and you’re gonna meet Sumo. One day, that’s all I’m asking.” Hank’s tone made it clear that he wasn’t going to be taking no as an answer.

“Alright.” Connor wouldn’t have turned down the offer anyway, not when it came to spending time to Hank.

With that taken care of, they both got back to work. Connor nearly jumped out of his skin when the alarm on his phone went off. From the looks of it, the sound had startled Hank  as well. Connor turned it off quickly and began packing his things.

“Well, that’s my cue,” he said with an awkward laugh, “I’m gonna grab a drink for the road, Want me to get you anything?”

When he looked up, Hank was also getting his things together, “how about you get the drinks Saturday. I’ll join you in line though.”

Connor waited for Hank to finish getting his things together and then they joined the line. Now that he was standing, Connor stretched slightly to alleviate some of the stiffness in his back and let out a satisfied sigh when he finished.

“Do you have plans for the night Hank?” He asked, looking over his shoulder.

“Go home, order take out and pend time with my dog.” He replied, “What about you?”

“Take my finals. Then when I get home check to see if I passed the ones I took yesterday and either order victory or pity pizza.” He responded which got a laugh out of Hank.

“How about this. Since I’m so certain it will be victory pizza, I’ll pay for it.”

“But you don’t have my number,” Connor said turning to face Hank.

“You’ll have to give it to me then, won’t you.” He said with a wink and Connor died. Or maybe he was already dead. Adding that energy shot to the Due North probably killed him and this was just a hallucination.

Hank tapped Connor’s shoulder to get his attention and he took the offered phone. He put his number in and set his contact as Connor :). He handed the phone back and by the time he got to the counter he felt his phone vibrate with a message, he could guess who it was from. Josh gave him a suspicious smile.

“Don’t even start.” Connor muttered, cutting him off, “a medium black coffee please.”

Josh put one hand up in mock surrender and used the other to put in the drink order. Connor paid and headed for the end counter, fighting a smile the whole way.

He checked his phone for new messages, and sure enough there were two from a new number.

3132480705: Hello

3132480705: This is Hank :)

Connor: Hello Hank :)

He added the other to his contact list under Hank <3, because he had a crush and couldn’t help himself. He put his phone back in his sweatshirt pocket as Hank joined the group at the end counter.

“So what tests are you taking tonight,” Hank asked, crossing his arms over his chest in a relaxed manner.

“Biology and then mythology. Tomorrow is sociology.” Connor pulled his phone out to double check his calendar, then put it away again, “then assuming I’ve passed those I’m scheduled to take my nurses exam next Friday.”

“It’s good that you gave yourself a week to study,” he said as Connor went up for his drink, when he came back Connor was wearing a sheepish smile.

“I, uh, didn’t plan it like this. The first testing block was full when I applied.” He waved at Hank as he stepped away, “anyway I’ve got to go. I can, um, text you updates if you want.”

“Sure. Good luck Con.” Hank said as Connor left the cafe.

As soon as he got a cab he texted the group chat which had been suspiciously quiet the whole time he had been with Hank.

The Coffee Crew: 

RunawayArkait: Hank gave me his number!

RunawayArkait: Also! I am meeting Sumo this weekend.

RunawayArkait: So, progress. I think?

What.Josh.Does: You have his number and you’re meeting his dog. Yet you’re still questioning if you made progress

Northern_Lights: Go get your man!

SimonSays: Be safe please

RunawayArkait: I mean, Saturday is more of a hostage situation

RunawayArkait: I don’t take enough time for myself apparently

Northern_Lights: Oh. So you’ll listen to him on that!

Northern_Lights: What does that make us?

RunawayArkait: Friends who I love dearly

What.Josh.Does: Well either way, congrats

SimonSays: Don’t forget to tell your brothers

RunawayArkait: Thanks

-

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: Guess what?

Sixty-Second-Set: Your finals were cancelled!

UnluckyNine: You passed your exams?

RunawayArkait: Close, but no

RunawayArkait: Hank gave me his number

UnluckyNine: Nice

Sixty-Second-Set: It’s about fucking time

Sixty-Second-Set: If I had to hear you shine about him one more time I was going to pose as you and get it myself

RunawayArkait: Silas!

UnluckyNine: Just be glad it didn’t come to that

Connor rolled his eyes as the cab pulled up to the university. It shouldn’t surprise him that Silas would threaten him with something that extreme, in Silas’s opinion the more dramatic the even the better. Connor was glad it hadn’t needed to come to that, he knew Silas had meant it. He paid for the cab and made his way to building 27 for the last time this week.

He made his way to the second floor and took a seat at one of the hall tables. He took out his biology notes to go over them again before it was time for the test. He had half an hour, he wouldn’t get through everything but it was better than nothing. Science was a bit like math in that following a predetermined procedure would lead to one of a few results.

The half hour passed quickly since he was preoccupied, when students began leaving the lecture hall he began packing up his things. Just like his two previous finals, he didn’t feel like he was ready. He knew his grades by themselves were good enough to get him into the program, but the tests also came with a passing margin and he didn’t want to rely on his grades alone.

HIs  father had raised him and his brothers under the belief that it wouldn’t matter how hard they worked toward their goals since there would always be someone out there that could do it better. He had meant for it to encourage them to go to school and help with the business, but Connor had taken it to mean that he needed to be the one working the hardest to get where he wanted in life. Silas had done similarly albeit in a very different way, and Richard had worked to make himself as close to invisible as possible.

He was waiting outside the classroom for the last of the students to leave when his phone vibrated and pulled him from his thoughts. He pulled it out of his hoodie to put it on silent and saw a message from Hank. He had time, so he opened it.

Hank <3: You’ve got this kid

Connor: Thanks :)

Connor smiled and put his phone away. The room was finally empty and the professor allowed them to come in. He took his usual seat and took a moment to mentally prepare. He got drawn into the test into the test and what he needed of the two hour block flew by. He finished with fifteen minutes left after having gone over his answer just to be sure. He texted Hank first as he left the classroom.

Connor: One more then I’m done for the night

Hank <3: You’ll do great, don’t worry

Connor: :)

He waited until he was in building 1 to message everyone else. He sat in the second floor study area and took a break from his notes.

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: Just mythology left

UnluckyNine: That should be easy

Sixty-Second-Set: Hopefully there aren’t any essay questions.

-

The Coffee Crew:

RunawayArkait: Last test for the night is mythology

SimonSays: You’ll be able to get some decent sleep tonight

What.Josh.Does: Good Luck

Northern_Lights: God I hated that class

He spent the hour before his mythology final studying for it. Working his way through all of the lecture and reading notes he had taken during the semester. This particular professor didn’t believe in midterms so the final covered everything they had gone over during the semester. It annoyed Connor slightly, he would rather take two smaller tests than one massive one. They had been told that there would be at least ten questions from each era of mythology they had covered. it was a daunting undertaking and Connor didn’t think he was ready for it. Not that it mattered much, considering as he didn’t have a choice, but the sheer size of the test made his looming anxiety seem heavier. If he didn’t finish in time he would fail automatically and could kiss his shot at the nurses exam goodbye.

Connor did his best to shake those thoughts from his head as he go this things together. Maybe if he got there as the first exam was finishing he could get an early start. He grabbed his bag and made his way to the classroom waiting across the hall for the other exam to let out. He got his quarter out again to calm his nerves. He went through the same motions as the cafe. Rolling the coin over his knuckles before tossing it in the air and catching it. He did all of this without looking. On the fifth toss the door opened and Connor caught his coin putting it away. He waited for a gap in the students so he could enter the classroom. The professor wouldn’t let him start early, but he did gain extra time to study as he waited on his classmates. He hoped it would help him get through the test faster to have some of the information fresh in his mind.

When the exam was handed out Connor silently cursed Silas and came to understand why North had hated the class so much. More than half of the test was made up of short answer or essay questions. This was going to take forever. With a sigh that was just as much annoyed as it was anxious Connor started on the exam. He finished with a little over five minutes left in the test period. He was one of the last students in the room. He turned in the exam and left quickly, letting out a relieved sigh once he was back in the hall.

Connor: Done for the night and about to head home

Hank <3: How are you feeling?

Connor: Stressed and relieved

Connor: Happy that this is almost over

Hank <3: Take a break tonight. Alright?

Hank <3: Try and unwind

Connor: That sounds like a good plan

Connor: When I get home I’ll let you know if you owe me a pizza :p

Hank <3: Cheeky bastard

Connor: That shouldn’t be news to you

Hank <3: Its not ;)

Connor smiled at the conversation and opened discord as he got in the cab. He tapped his apartment address into the terminal before he messaged his brothers.

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: Silas you jinxed me

RunawayArkait: More than half the test was short answer or essay questions

Sixty-Second-Set: Oops. But you finished didn’t you?

UnluckyNine: Obviously. Congrats by the way

Sixty-Second-Set: Then everything is fine

RunawayArkait: Anyway, I’m gonna be offline for the night

Sixty-Second-Set: Enjoy talking with Hank

UnluckyNine: Don’t do anything Silas wouldn’t do

RunawayArkait: That leaves me a lot of options

RunawayArkait: Also I hate you both

-

The Coffee Crew:

RunawayArkait: Done for the night

RunawayArkait: We can compare test scores tomorrow Josh. I’m going to be offline tonight

SimonSays: Tell Hank hello

RunawayArkait: Why is everyone assuming that!

Northern_Lights: Are we wrong

RunawayArkait: Well no

What.Josh.Does: Alright. Tomorrow then. Have a good night Connor

RunawayArkait: Thanks

He opened Canvas in his phone’s web browser to check if the exams from yesterday had been graded. They had been and he had passed them both. He had gotten 100% on his calculus exam and a 95% on his art history exam. Both above the cut off. It was definitely going to be victory pizza. Then he was going to unwind with a glass of wine and a bubble bath. He’d use what was left of his night to catch up on his sleep.

The cab pulled up to his apartment complex, he paid and got out to head up to his unit. Once he was inside and had put his backpack away and sent Hank a screen shot of his test results.

Connor: So, victory pizza?

Hank <3: Victory pizza. You got any place you usually order from

Connor: Nope. You can pick

Connor: Medium with cheese and mushrooms please

Hank <3: I really should have known that your pizza order was going to be fucking weird

Hank <3: I need your complex name and your apartment number

Connor: Ridgewood Apartments building B5 apartment 205-B

Hank <3: Alright. It’ll be there in an hour

Connor: You’re the best

Hank <3: You only say that because I bought you pizza

Connor: And coffee ;)

Hank <3: You’re the worst

Connor: I try my best

He put his phone on full volume and walked into the kitchen and got out a stemless wine glass as well as the bottle of white wine Silas had bough him the last time he came over. He poured himself half a glass and put the bottle away. With the glass in hand he made his way back to the living room sat back on the couch and kicked his socked feet up onto the coffee table. He turned on the tv and turned it to the true crime channel, quickly getting absorbed in what was on. An hour or so later when there was a knock at his door Connor just about jumped out of his skin. He collected himself and answered the door. He took the pizza and tanked the delivery person before heading back to the living room. He opened the box and set it on the coffee table beside his wine glass. He took a picture and sent it to Hank.

Connor: The right way to celebrate finals (almost) being over

He received a picture in return. It was of Hank’s coffee table, there was a half full whiskey glass and Chinese take out. Sumo was sprawled out in the background.

Hank <3: You’ve got the right idea Con

Connor: Glad we can agree

He moved to the floor in the space between the couch and the coffee table so he could use it as a dining table. He had a couple slices of pizza and finished his first glass of wine before he put the left overs away. He poured another glass of wine and made his way to the bathroom. He started the bath added bubbles and let the water run as he went to his room to get pyjamas. He texted Hank again before he got into the bath.

Connor: Now for the best part of the night. Relaxing with a glass of wine.

Hank <3: I’m more of a whiskey guy myself, but that sounds like a good plan.

Connor let out a content sigh as he sank into the water and relaxed into the warmth. He played music from his phone and stayed in the water until it went cold. He rinsed off and got ready for bed and texted Hank as he plugged his phone in for the night.

Connor: Good night Hank

Hank <3: Sleep well Connor

Hank <3: We wouldn’t want North drawing on you again :)

Connor: No we would not

The next day he didn’t wake up until around noon, his body deciding to try and make up for all of his lost sleep in one go. He got up and got ready, taking what he would no longer need out of his backpack and heading for the cafe. Deciding to walk since it was nice out. While he was waiting to cross at a crosswalk he sent the screenshot of his test results to Josh.

What.Josh.Does: Nice! I got a 97%

What.Josh.Does: I’ll cover your first drink as promised

RunawayArkait: You’re the best

What.Josh.Does: You’re only saying that because I’m buying you a coffee

RunawayArkait: See you soon

He tucked his phone away and crossed the street and continued on his way to the cafe, He put his bag at his usual table and went to stand in line. Connor hadn’t been in line long when Hank’s voice sounded from behind him.

“Late start today Con?” Hank asked, the nickname he had given Connor rolled off his tongue like they had known each other for years. The dopey grin it caused to curl over Connor’s lips made him glad that Hank was behind him, “you’re usually passed out at your table by now.”

“That’s only happened like twice this week,” Connor argued, it was weak but it was all he had.

“Connor, its Wednesday,” Hank continued, “two out of three days this week you’ve been asleep at the table. A two-thirds average isn’t that great when you’re on the third day.”

“I don’t think I’ll be doing that today considering as I didn’t wake up until like noon.”

“So you finally made up for your lost sleep.”

“Apparently.” Connor said as he stepped up to the counter, “a large Iced Americano please.”

Josh put the order in and Connor walked to the end counter to wait. He was tempted to pull out his coin but the cafe was pretty busy today and the sound tended to annoy people. So he settled for signing the alphabet in reverse. This would be his last test for the semester, he’d had plenty of time to prepare and yet his anxiety was still eating at him. He finished one cycle of the alphabet and started over.

“So what are you doing with your hand?” Hank asked, scaring the life out of Connor who had retreated into his own thoughts.

“Signing the alphabet backwards.” Connor replied once he had collected himself.

“Why?”

“I need something to keep my hands busy when I’m anxious and I don’t want to annoy anyone with my quarter.”

“Test anxiety? Is that why you’ve been studying so hard?’

“Yeah. I want to do everything in my power to make sure I pass my exams.” His drink was called and he went up to the counter to grab it. He pointed to the table where his bag was and when Hank nodded Connor made his way over.

Connor took his seat and got out his sociology textbook and notes. By the time he had gotten his stuff out Hank was taking his usual seat across the table. He got out his laptop and they both got to work. They passed the time in busy pleasant silence until Hank asked him a question.

“So what do you do with your quarter that annoys people?” Hank asked as he looked up from his work.

“This.” He said as he pulled out the coin rolling it over his knuckles then flicking it up in the air, catching it in his other hand and then showed it off with a ‘tada’ motion.

“That’s a pretty neat trick.” Hank said with a half smile, “but i can see why you wouldn’t want to d it in a crowded place.”

“It annoys some people so I try to avoid doing it if I can.” He said, returning his attention to his notes.

The conversation fell away after that. Hank was the first to leave today, Sumo had a doctors appointment. They said their goodbyes and Connor got back to work. A few hours later when he was on his way to the university he sent Hank a text.

Connor: Last one. Wish me luck

Hank <3: You’ve got this Con, luck or no luck

Hank <3: But good luck

Connor: Thanks Hank. You’re the best

Hank <3: I try to be

Connor was smiling at his phone like a love struck idiot and it took all of his strength not to send a heart back. He didn’t want to make Hank uncomfortable. They were only friends and most friends didn’t do that. He set his phone in his lap and used his hands to cover his blush and matching dopey grin. He knew he had it bad. Going back over the texts, some of them sounded like flirting. Connor took a deep breath trying to collect himself, he needed to focus on his final for the time being.

He was somewhat back to himself when he got to the university. Once this test was done he had four days of what amounted to free time. Thursday, Friday, and Sunday were days he was going to use to study for his nurses exam and Saturday he was going to meet Sumo. Monday it was back to work as usual and then that Friday he was taking his nurses exam. Then it was back to business as usual until the fall semester started, He got out and made his way to building 1 for the last time this semester.

He made his way to the classroom as the previous class left. There wouldn’t be any last minute studying this time. He took his phone out of his pocket to double check that it was on silent then put it away. When the last of the students filed out Connor entered the class and took his usual seat.

Once it started, the testing block seemed to fly by. He finished with half an hour left. Surprisingly this test was the one he felt the most confidence for. When he got in a cab, he messaged Hank first.

Connor: I’m done!

Connor: My finals are finished!

Hank <3: Congratulations! For the next two weeks you’re free

Connor: I’m going home and taking a fucking nap

Hank <3: It’s well earned

Hank <3: Sleep well Con

-

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: I’m done

UnluckyNine: Congratulations

Sixty-Second-Set: Time to celebrate

RunawayArkait: Time to take a nap

UnluckyNine: That works too

Sixty-Second-Set: Boring

-

The Coffee Crew:

RunawayArkait: I’m free

SimonSays: Nice

What.Josh.Does: Good for you

Northern_Lights: Party time!

RunawayArkait: Sorry to disappoint, but I’ll be taking a nap

Northern_Lights: That’s boring

Connor rolled his eyes as he closed discord going back to his conversation with Hank.

Connor: Apparently I’m boring for wanting to sleep off my finals

Hank <3: They’re your tests. You get to pick how you celebrate

Connor: Exactly. So I’m going to make up for lost sleep

Hank <3: Sounds like a good plan to me

Connor: Thanks

The cab arrived at his apartment and he paid and got out. Exhaustion weighed down on him as he made his way up to his unit. He’d reheat a couple slices of pizza for dinner and then head to bed. He fumbled with his keys for a moment before getting his door unlocked

Once he was inside he dropped his bag by the door and kicked his shoes off. In the morning the mess would probably bother him, but he was tired now so that was future Connor’s problem. He opened the fridge and grabbed two slices of pizza and put them on a paper towel then in the microwave. Tonight was a lazy night. He changed into pyjamas and came back into the kitchen when the microwave went off. For the sake of convenience he ate over the kitchen sink. He rushed through his nightly routine, Before he climbed into bed he pugged in his phone and messaged Hank one last time.

Connor: Good night Hank

Hank <3: Sleep well Connor

Thursday found him awake around eleven. Unlike yesterday there was no sleep hangover, for the first time in a long time he felt well rested. He spent the first part of the day cleaning his apartment and doing laundry. Giving his brain a break from the bookwork, which felt pretty nice.

Around three o’clock he made his way to the cafe. He stood in line and looked around. He found Hank at their usual table, he was absorbed in his work and had earbuds in. Since he had the time, he messaged him to see if he wanted anything.

Connor: I’m in line. Would you like anything

He scanned the menu deciding on a chai tea rather than coffee since he felt well rested for once. He looked down when his phone vibrated.

Hank <3: Fist of all, you scared the ever loving fuck outta 

Hank <3: My usual with two shots please

Connor: Got it :)

Connor: And sorry. I just thought I’d ask since I was up here

When it was his turn he noticed one of the new trainees, Echo, he believed, working the register while North worked the bar. He smiled at the blue haired woman, “Could I get a medium Chai Tea with cinnamon and nutmeg as well as a Vanilla Latte with two shots of espresso.”

She seemed to struggle with the first drink and North came to her aid, staying to help with the second and writing on the cups to make things easier. Connor always spoke his orders to the new hires since knowing how to sign wasn’t a requirement and he didn’t want to assume they knew it.  Shifts were designed so that at least one person who knew Sign Language was there. Once the drinks were up, he headed for the table.

He sat across from Hank in his usual seat and slid the cup across the table while Hank took out his earbuds, “so manuscript today or short stories?”

“Manuscript surprisingly enough.” Hank said before drinking from his latte and letting out a content hum, “what about you? What book are you rubbing your nose against today?”

“Today I’m going over the notes and study guide Markus gave me to make flashcards to go over on my breaks since I go back to work on Monday,” Connor said as he got out what he would need. Typed out notes, a hand written study guide, a stack of one thousand notecards, and a pencil pouch with that said ‘always look on the bright side’ on the front.

Hank gave an amused chuckle and shook his head, “I still think you should go over the definition of the word break Con.”

Connor drank from his chai tea to cover the involuntary grin that the nickname caused, “I’m taking an ‘actual’ day off on Saturday. Remember?”

Hank rolled his eyes but seemed to accept Connor’s flimsy argument. They lapsed into a companionable silence. Connor was working on his flashcards and Hank was working on his manuscript. Occasionally Connor would catch himself staring at Hank, but would look away before he got caught and forced himself get back to work. Until his luck ran out and Hank met his eyes cracking a smile that lead Connor to believe he hadn’t been nearly as stealthy as he had thought.

“See something you like Connor?” Hank joked, and it had to be a joke. Despite the way some of their messages read there was no way Hank would ever flirt with him. Connor turned into a tomato anyway.

“I was, um, I was just staring off into space...” he trailed off never having been all that great of a liar. He wanted the ground to open up and swallow them whole.

Hank didn’t look like he believed Connor but he didn’t comment on it. They went back to their easy silence until Hank had to leave.

“Sumo is getting groomed tomorrow, so I’m not gonna make it to the cafe,” Hank sounded almost upset that he was going to miss a day. Like he looked forward to these days too.

“That’s alright,” Connor said with a slight shrug, “we’ll see each other on Saturday.”

“See you Saturday then,” Hank responded with a half smile as he turned to leave.

Connor watched him go before getting back to his notecards. It took him a few hours and a couple cups of coffee to get them finished, and once he was done he headed home. He would probably stay home tomorrow too. Take a day to himself and mentally prepare for meeting Sumo and what that would bring.

He finished off the pizza and did the rest of his laundry. With his apartment mostly clean and his laundry done, Connor decided to call it a night. Once again messaging Hank before falling asleep.

Connor: Good night Hank

Hank <3: Night Connor

Hank <3: Don’t work too hard tomorrow

Connor: No promises, but I’ll try my best

He spent most of Friday morning fretting over what to wear. Eventually deciding on a black short sleeve button down that was patterned with gradient grey roses, black jeans and grey converse. It wasn’t a date, but looking nice couldn’t hurt anything. He hung the outfit on his closet door and paced into his living room debating on if it would be better to message his brothers or his friends. Richard hadn’t dated anyone before so seeking him out for romantic advise probably wouldn’t be the wisest. Silas preferred a friends with benefits arrangement over dating so he wouldn’t be any help. North would just make fun of him. That left Josh, Simon, and Markus. Simon and Markus were dating so that would probably be the best bet.

RunawayArkait has started a group chat with Made-By_Markus and SimonSays!

RunawayArkait: I need help

RunawayArkait: What does one do on a not-date visit to their crush’s house to meet their dog

SimonSays: Send their kind and supportive friends pictures of said dog. Obviously

SimonSays: Keep a level head, but pay enough attention to see if he is flirting back

RunawayArkait: Flirting back? That implies that I flirt with him. Which I don’t!

Made-By_Markus: But you do. I’ve heard all about it from Simon

RunawayArkait: Rude!

Made-By_Markus: As cliche as it sounds, just be yourself

SimonSays: Relax. Like you said, it’s not a date

RunawayArkait: Thanks I guess

Made-By_Markus: Anytime. Also Simon, I’m in the lobby

SimonSays: Alright. I’ll be down soon

RunawayArkait: And that’s my cue to leave. Enjoy your date!

Made-By_Markus: Thanks

Connor groaned at the lack of help. Figuring he was stressing too much over something that was decidedly not a date, he decided to spend the rest of his Friday curled up on the couch catching up on all of the true crime shows he had missed on his study binge.

He woke up at eight in the morning on Saturday. He took his time getting ready and once he was satisfied with his appearance he left for the cafe at around eleven-thirty. He decided to walk so he could work off some of the anxiety that was thrumming beneath his skin. He debated cancelling several times, but eventually decided that he deserved to meet a new dog after having worked so hard to pass all of his finals. If it so happened that he was reading too far into this, which was incredibly likely, he would have at least gotten to see a new dog. He would be able to add a Saint Bernard to his mug which he would have to edit and then reorder. He won either way.

Connor arrived to find Hank waiting outside the cafe with one of the biggest and most fluffy dogs he had ever seen. Sumo sat neatly beside Hank looking to be very well trained, which was probably pretty helpful considering the dog’s size. He took a picture of Sumo with is phone before greeting Hank.

“You’re here early.” Connor said in way of a greeting and Hank turned to him with a smile.

“So are you Con,” he said, lifting his free hand in a lazy wave, “but that’s more expected of you than me.”

Connor laughed, “Yeah.”

Hank changed the subject, “So I didn’t find a no pets sign but I just wanted to check if Sumo would be allowed inside.”

“Unfortunately no. We do have a service animal policy tough.” Connor kept himself from gesturing at the door with his free hand by reaching it out toward Sumo so the large dog could sniff at it, “I can go inside and get the drinks then meet you back out here, since I’m covering drinks today anyway. Your usual?”

“Sounds good to me,” Hank said with a thankful smile. “I’ll let you know if we head back to the car.”

“Thanks/” Connor said as he headed inside.

The line was thankfully short and it didn’t take long to place their order. An iced Americano for Connor and a Vanilla Latte with two shots of espresso for Hank. When he exited the cafe, both Hank and Sumo were at the bench.

“Ready?” Hank asked as he got up, Sumo obediently following suit.

“Yup.” He handed the latte off as they walked to the car and Sumo happily snuffled at his free hand as they went.

When they got to the car Connor opened the back door on the passenger side so Hank could get Sumo in. With that taken care of, Connor got in on the passenger side, only to have Sumo lean forward and lick a stripe up his face when he turned to look in the back seat. Hank laughed at the sight.

“Hello to you too Sumo.” Connor said, using his jacket sleeve to wipe the drool off of his face then reaching back to pet him, “its nice to meet you.”

“What kind of dog do you think you’re gonna get once you graduate?” Hank asked as he pulled out of the parking lot and began the drive to his house.

“Either an Australian Shepherd or a Golden Retriever,” Connor replied, “small enough to keep in an apartment but big enough to socially be considered a dog. I hope to be able to put them through search and rescue as well as service training.”

“Why am I not surprised you have all of this planned out.” Hank shook his head with a fond smile.

“I like being organized.”

“I can tell.”

Connor rolled his eyes, “What made you decide on a Saint Bernard?”

“I picked him up from a shelter a few years back.” He paused for a moment, seeming to consider his words, “my fiance and I had split and I didn’t want to be alone in the house. Took about a month to realize i was going to need a bigger yard and then we moved. Whoever had him first had already trained him which has made things a lot easier.” He looked in the rearview mirror at Sumo for a moment, “the big lug even knows a couple of hand signs.”

Hank had a fiance at one point, a few years back apparently. Connor wanted to ask about it, but the rapid change in topic made it clear that Hank didn’t want to, “Really? What commands does he know the signs for?”

“I’ll show you when we get to the house, how about that?” Hank suggested.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

As it turned out, Sumo knew the signs for sit, stay, laydown, and roll over. Connor spent the next few hours teaching him the sign commands for speak, play dead, shake hands, and high five. It didn’t go well, which was fine because hank seemed to get a kick out of it. Once he gave up and settled beside Hank on the couch they ordered take out and talked enjoying each other’s company. It was a few hours later, when they were getting ready to leave that Hank asked him a favor.

“So I kind of had an ulterior motive for asking you over today,” Hank started with a tentative smile. “There’s a writers’ conference next weekend, I was wondering if you would mind stopping by to check on Sumo while I’m away since he seems to like you.”

“Of course I wouldn’t mind,” Connor said as he headed for the door. “He’s well behaved and a sweetheart.”

“Thank you so much.” Hank sounded genuinely relieved. He opened the front door and called over his shoulder to Sumo, “I’ll be back soon. Be good while I take Connor home.”

“I’ll see you next weekend,” Connor called to the dog as he left.

The ride to Connor’s apartment was filled with idle chatter, broken up occasionally by Connor giving Hank directions. It was nice, and his anxiety over today seemed distant and unnecessary. Today had been easy and comfortable. They arrived at his complex about twenty minutes later and Connor wasn’t ready to be done yet.

“Uh, today was nice,” Connor said eloquently. He was pretty sure he couldn’t have been more awkward if he tried.

“Yeah, it was,” Hank said seeming just as nervous, “um, if you want to come by again just let me know I guess.”

“Yeah. Uh, thanks then.” Hank unlocked the door as Connor reached for the handle, “I’ll um, I’ll watch Sumo whenever you need me to.”

“Thanks Con,” he said as Connor opened the door and got out, “have a good night.”

“You too Hank.” Connor gave him a slight wave before he shut the car door and went inside the complex. He had been so awkward. Hank definitely know now and he was probably uncomfortable.

Connor let out a frustrated groan once he was in his apartment. He made himself a cup of tea to help wind down before bed. The best thing he could do would be to act like nothing had changed and maybe they could still be friends. He sighed and finished his tea and got ready for bed. He texted Hank as usual before calling it a night.

Connor: Thanks for today Hank. It was a lot of fun

Connor: Good night

Hank <3: I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. Sleep well Con

Connor smiled at his phone before setting it aside and falling asleep. As long as he could keep his feeling tucked away, things would be fine. 

Sunday went by in a blur of studying and self pity. He answered messages as they came, trying to make it seem like things were normal. Like he hadn’t potentially fucked everything up. He was thankful he had today to wallow because come tomorrow he had to be a functioning human being. When he was getting ready for bed, he checked the messages from Hank like he hadn’t been avoiding him all day.

Hank <3: Are you coming to the cafe today?

Hank <3: Is everything alright?

Hank <3: Connor?

Connor: Sorry

Connor: My exhaustion from the week came back with a vengeance

Connor: I didn’t mean to worry you

Hank <3: It’s alright

Hank <3: I’m just glad to see that you’re okay

Connor: I’m going to call it a night

Hank <3: Sleep well

Connor: Thank you

Guilt clung to Connor as he drifted off making his sleep uneasy and restless. He didn’t mean to make Hank worry he just hadn’t known how to face him. When morning rolled around he was exhausted. He went through his morning routine on autopilot. He made coffee and poured it into his travel mug before walking to work. He was almost late, but made up for it by working part of the lunch rush. He didn’t see Hank before he clocked out for the day. He walked back home and took some time to himself before studying. 

The rest of the week went similarly. His texts to Hank throughout the day and before bed became the parts of his routine he looked forward to the most. he had Friday off so he could take his nurses exam. Connor didn’t feel like he would be ready, but this was all the time he was going to get. He would deal with it come Friday.

He woke up early on Friday and spent his morning studying. He left for the university around two and messaged Hank first when he got in the cab.

Connor: On my way to the exam

Hank <3: Good luck

Hank <3: Let me know how it goes

Connor: Will do :)

-

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: Time for the exam

Sixty-Second-Set: You’ve got this

UnluckyNine; You’re more than ready

-

The Coffee Crew

RunawayArkait: Exam day

Northern_Lights: Bet you’ll be in the top half of the class

Echo-Over-The-Water: Good luck Connor!

SimonSays: You’ll do great

What.Josh.Does: Here comes the cafe’s second nursing student

Connor put his [hone on silent and spent the rest of the cab ride going over his notecards. Markus had given him a general idea of what the test would cover, though the specific questions were changed every testing period. The test was a mix of essay, short answer, and multiple choice questions. They would have three hours to finish. Connor wasn’t exactly confident that he would pass, but he was fairly certain he would finish before the testing period ended. The results would be posted on Monday and he would have time to register for the recommended classes and buy books after that. Not to mention a whole weekend with Sumo to help with his worry.

He took his time on the exam, and then more time to go back over and correct some of his answers. He turned in the exam with fifteen minutes left in the period. He ordered a cab and messaged Hank, knowing that the other was on a flight and he wouldn’t get a reply.

Connor: Finished my exam and I’m feeling pretty good about it

Connor: I’ll swing by in a couple hours to check on Sumo and send pictures

-

The Family Feud:

RunawayArkait: It’s done

UnluckyNine: Congrats

Sixty-Second-Set: Look at you go Mr. Nurse

-

The Coffee Crew:

RunawayArkait: Finished!

RunawayArkait: I’m gonna be gone for the weekend

SimonSays: Give Sumo lots of love for us!

Echo-Over-The-Water: Congratulations!

Northern_Lights: You did it

What.Josh.Does: Enjoy your weekend

When he got to his apartment he set his bag on the couch and set an alarm on his phone for three hours from now and laid down for a nap. When he woke up he would pack for his weekend with Sumo.

[rezdogsyonder]

Changing

Pairing: Peter Parker x Tall!Reader

Summary: Peter has found his soulmate but does she feel the same? Basically a soulmate au but different

Warnings: kidnapping, drugging,

A/N: Peter is aged up. Also I changed his powers just a tiny bit just one thing and the rest is the same.

This peice is unfinished and it will remain unfinished because I’m leaving tumblr and will not be returning. If you wish to continue this you may.

*********

Fuck. Not right now. Not today.

That’s all you can think as you’re nearly late for your first day as an photographer. It isn’t the first place you wanted to work for but you need the money. Well probably not a “real” photographer. You’re not hired for the job on a regular basis, but for their front page photos of Spider-Man. It’s cool, Spider-Man won’t let anybody else take his photos.

Well, it’s not really your first day but it’s the first day that Jameson is actually considering you as his official Spider-Man photographer. Before you usually would email him asking if he needed more photos and now he is finally now telling you that you’re going to be the official photographer for the weekly Spider-Man pieces.

You have started a blog for the hero and hopefully it will gain traction and maybe you’ll get to make an income from it. But for now you have to sell your photos to the Daily Bugle.

The rent is due Friday and you get a check from the gas station you work at that day, it won’t be enough to cover it though. But with a check after each batch of photos you provide will put you way over the green this pay day.

You’re rushing about your medium sized 1 room apartment. This place was a gem, the only reason this place was as cheap as a studio is because a billboard was directly across from the extremely large windows. Lighting up your entire apartment. It didn’t bother you much, it saved on electricity from never having to turn on the lights and all you needed was blackout curtains in your room.

You are not changing shirts but you squeeze into a pair of black pants. The grey boyfriend cardigan getting tucked in the back, but it doesn’t deter you from running to the bathroom and vigorously brushing your teeth. You’ll have to forgo the entire makeup routine but you have time for foundation and mascara.

Rushing back into your bedroom you pull a pair of socks from the top drawer of your dresser and look at your alarm clock. 9:42. 18minutes till you’re late. Well you know in Jameson’s eyes you are already late but he screams at you no matter what.

Your second shoe is tied, you got your purse and it has your wallet, phone, and keys already. You run out of your room and in the hallway of the complex. Fuck, locking these doors seems to be the longest part of leaving. 3 locks, self installed with the extra long screws. Never needed this much security before but some blind asshole next door seems to always be getting into fights. Like what the fuck, how hard is it to not fight someone, and then he leads them here.

Once the doors are locked and you’re out of the building you look at your phone. 9:44. 16 minutes to go around 2 miles. Well broadway cuts across, so probably less, but anyways you gotta run it. Now you’re not the most fit person, but you are able to push yourself more than what others would think you’d be able to.

Dodging people and avoiding running into the road, you make it to the first turn. Basically a straight shot now, but it seems as though people are wanting to be in your way today. You would love a bike right about now. Though you’d have a really high chance of getting hit by a car. But it’s right about the same risk since you are not stopping at the do not walk signs.

One car almost did hit you, but it braked in time but not without you slapping the hood as you went by. Not on purpose but from loss of balance. Well you probably would have slapped it anyways. Your face burns from the run, and the heat, it is the end of summer but it is still pretty hot out.

Oh god, this is awful, you’re just a more than halfway and you nearly ran into an old man and his wife outside of m&m world.

“Sorry!” You shout back but it’s not very loud and sounds winded. You won’t stop though.

Just a couple more turns. Just two more turns. Just one more. You keep telling yourself that you’re almost there, legs straining the muscles from the over exertion.

You get into the building and run to the elevator. You know you probably look unprofessional right about now but you don’t care. You just need to catch your breath.

You press the right floor and dig through your purse. The small mirror being a lifesaver as of recently, since being late is seeming to become a common ovccurance. You pat your forehead with the sleeve of your cardigan. You don’t look too bad, but not the best. You check the time, 9:58. Not bad, you’ll be just 1 minute early. The elevator ride giving you just enough time to breath properly.

The elevator doors open to the busy floor, and you go over to Jameson’s assistant, not even reaching her desk before she points her pen behind her to his office.

“L/N!” He immediately shouts, “Where are those photos?” He is still looking out the window behind his desk.

“Right here sir,” you pull the envelope out of your purse holding it out for him to take it. Which he does, ripping the lip of the envelope and begins examining your photos.”

“850. Tell Betty on your way out.” He plops you’re photos on his desk.

“850? That’s not my rate, there are 12 photos there.”

“These just aren’t worth your usual rate. 850.” He argues back, you’ve seen this before, had you been any smaller or even sitting he would have put his hands on his desk and leaned towards you to seem intimidating, but right now he looks like a child with his hands balled at his side.

“65 per photo or I go to The Post.” You won’t back down. That’s nearly a thousand, and you don’t want to let it go, even if it is less than 200 more than what he offered but you need it.

He stares at you, he’s turning red now in the ears. You collect your photos calling his bluff.

“Fine,” he grumbles, he presses a button on the small speaker on his desk, “Betty, write out a check for L/N for 975.” He released the button and you put the photos down. “Get out of here, she’ll call when we have another piece.”

“You’re a peach,” you smiled as you back out of his office. “Hey Betty, how’re you doing this week?”

“Just fine, but his wife wants me to control his anger as soon as his meds are sorted. Not looking forward to that.” She finishes filling out the check on her computor, and with one last click that is so familiar to you now, you know she printed it.

“Jesus, I do not want to be here for that.” You step back four steps to the printer and rip off the receipt at the bottom that she needs to keep and hand it to her. “Good luck, because you will need it. Thanks, see you next week!” You wave bye as the doors close.

Letting out a sigh of relief, and tucking your check into your wallet. You’re glad you won’t have to worry anymore. With this check you’ll have four or five hundred more than you’ll need for rent, meaning you won’t have to scrape by for grocerys.

You better hurry though, you have an hour till your next shift at the gas station and you still need a shower.

**********

The hours are going by slowly, with few customers to keep you distracted. Just 4 more hours and you get to call it a night. It has already been 6 hours since you clocked in and there had only been a handful of customers, making the day uncharacteristically slow.

Your phone begins vibrating on the small fridge below the counter, the shift managers name on the display screen. Seeing as there’s no customers you think it is fine to answer.

“Hello? Debby?” You greet subconciously.

“Y/N I have some bad news.” She pauses, “the person who is supposed to relieve you is refusing to come in. She quit.”

“What am I supposed to do? I’ve been here since 11:30, I don’t think it’s allowed for me to work past 1. Wasn’t her shift supposed to last till 8?”

“Yes I know but you are legally allowed to work till 4:30, and that is when I’ll take over because I cannot find another person to cover her shift. It’s only alright because I’m switching your shift tomorrow with Alex and you’ll have the day off to recuperate. Then it’s your usual day off the next so I think that’s enough time to get back to normal.”

“So I’m leaving at 4:30?” Disbelief evident in your voice.

“Yes, I’m sorry, I would get there now but John doesn’t come home until late tonight because he took the graveyard shift at his job and I can’t leave J.C. alone.”

“Yeah I understand, family comes first.”

“Thank you, you’re the best. See ya later.”

“Yeah, see you.”

You put down your phone and mentally prepare yourself for another 11 hours.

**********

Three red bulls, and a seasonal pumpkin spice coffee from the dispenser and it was almost midnight.

Many more customers has came in after the call, the universe seemingly wanting to tire you out further. Then it began slowing down again after 9. The time you were supposed to be going home if Patricia didn’t fucking refuse to come in.

It was about that time that a young man came in, wearing a dark suit but without the blazer. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Light brown hair and pale skin, he looked breathtaking. He quickly rounds to the back grabbing three of the big bottles of water.

“Just these for me...” he trails off as he sniffs, then he looks up and makes eye contact with you.

You two are staring at each other for a few seconds, his stare becoming unbearable and you look away.

“Ok sir... that’ll be 5.97.” You still feel his gaze. Refusing to look up, you bag his things. You hear his card slide through the machine.

“Thank you sir, have a nice night.”

“Yeah... you too.” And with that he was gone. Leaving you to think about this stranger for the rest of your shift.

**********

As promised, Debbie came at 4:30. You left to walk home. It was nice living basically across the street from your work. A short walk, but you still felt a sense of unease.

Looking all around you, you don’t spot any suspicious people. Not even one heading in the same direction as you. You let out a small sigh as you cross the road. But it does nothing to calm your nerves.

You’re trying not to seem panicked as you try to get through the door to your building but it might be obvious with how you’re shaking.

Past the door you let go if your breath that you didn’t know you were holding. Finally able to calm down. You walked to apartment, using the elevator instead of the stairs.

Once at your door your heart beat seems to have gone back to normal, but before you even put your key in the door you feel the hairs at the back of your neck stand up. You don’t know what it is, maybe it’s just a chill.

Unlocking all the locks you go inside, greeted by the bright pink fluorescent lights. You shut the door behind you and drop your bag on the floor. Too tired to care. Moving to go into your room, knowing that you’re not going to change into pajamas either.

Well probably take of the pants. Yeah, jeans are never comfy.

Shoes kicked off, pants off, bra off with some difficulty from your long sleeves, blankets pulled back and you’re ready for bed. You’re getting in when you hear a creek in the living room, but you don’t see anyone so it’s maybe the upstairs neighbours.

You turn around once more to lay down and you feel a pinprick at your neck. You slump over and you feel hands at your shoulders, picking you up in their arms.

Eyes won’t open, and you are quickly losing consciousness.

“Shh, you’re safe with me.”

*********

Your head is pounding, that’s what wakes you up. You still feel groggy and it makes your eyelids feel incredibly heavy. You want to sleep for more but your eyes keep fighting to open.

Once they do you are met with a room that is not your own. Everything is white, except the headboard which is a light grey, matching the bedside table. You look around, about 6 feet from the foot of the bad is a back door and there’s a bathroom to the left of the bed with the door wide open.

You run to the closed door, you grasp the handle but you get a head rush and are unable to turn the handle for a good 5 seconds. It’s no use though, the door was locked, and it doesn’t seem like a regular lock. It seems more advanced, it’s a regular handle but it’s warm, and doesn’t have any keyhole. It’s also not as big as a hotel handle, like the ones with the scanners. Irrelevant, but your mind is running a million miles an hour and you’re trying really hard to not panic.

You realize that you aren’t wearing your pants but a pair of sweats were at the edge of the king bed. You quickly pull them on. Your kidnapper has already seen your ass, but it’s a little bit comforting. Your bladder is full and it is more apparent now than a couple minutes ago.

They aren’t here yet, better be quick. You half jog into the bathroom it has a large sink and a nice looking shower, but you don’t want to use it due to there being no lock on the bathroom door and the shower door is glass. Not even one of those blurred glass doors, it is crystal clear.

You had already peed and we’re washing your hands when you hear a small beep and the locks opening. You’re drying your hands when you hear a knock at the door. You don’t answer.

Another knock, you stared at the door, a low sigh is heard and the door swings open.

It was the man from last night, except now he was covering his eyes with his hand.

“I swear I’m not looking but please come out right now.”

“... alright.” You’re voice is a little rough and just above a whisper.

“Thank you.” He turned around leaving the door open and you follow.

“Come with me.” he waves his hand over the lock and the beep is heard again.

He leads you through the door into a long hallway, when he turned to the left so did you. There’s no point in running when he would catch you in less than 2 seconds.

You pass by 4 doors, one on your left and three on your right. The fifth door on the right you entered and it was an office.

“Sit.” And you did, he sat behind the large desk and leaned forward with his elbows on it. “I need to tell you something that would be hard to hear. Hell, hard to believe, but just know that everything I’m telling you is true.”

You nodded when he paused and looked at you. You felt so out of place and uncomfortable. Heart beating so fast and hard, it feels as though it’s bursting out of your chest. Your hands slightly shaking and feet tapping where you sat on the edge of this obviously expensive chair.

“I’m going to be frank with you alright? You are my soulmate.”

You freeze, “wait... what?” You didnt believe it, he was right. He’s crazy. Soulmates were a rare thing in this world. How would he know? He only knew you for 5 seconds so why does he know? Why would he take you?

“We are soulmates. I felt it when I first met eyes with you, I know that you did too. I took you here because, to put it simply, you would be safe. There are many people after me and if they learned of your existsence they would find you and use you against me.”

“H-how do I know your not lying?” You stare at the lines in the wood of his desk, refusing to look up. When you look him in the eyes you feel the same pull that you did back at the gas station. You hear rustling and you glance up for just a second, then you look back when you realize it’s just his arm that he wants you to look at.

He begins rolling his sleeves like the way you saw last night. Or was it even still the next day? You don’t know. Not seeing any clock or any windows since you were at your home.

Beautiful lines are spread across his forearm and you realize it wasn’t there before. “Can you look at your arm?” His voice is gentle, like he’s trying to be comforting.

You stare at his arm as you pull your sleeve up, then you look down at a blank arm. You pull up your other sleeve just as roughly and see the same tattoo that he has. You touch it gently as though it’ll smear if you are as rough as you were two seconds ago.

“Mine showed up a little after I stepped out of that store. I guess you didn’t notice yours.” You rub at yours and it won’t come off, and the skin isn’t raised as though you have a regular tattoo.

“What does this mean?”

“This means that you are now mine.” You feel tears welling in your eyes.

“So I can’t go home?”

“No, and some things are going to change.” You look at him wide eyed, fearful for the changes that he has in mind.

“So I’m sure you have heard of the powered people of New York, and I am telling you that I am one of them. Not only that, but I am a member of the avengers.” He pauses, you feel his eyes on you and you can only assume he is trying to gauge your reaction. “But I didn’t achieve my abilities through government testing or anything of the sort. I was bit by a mutant spider and I gained the spiders abilities.”

“You’re... Spider-Man?”

“That’s right. Now that you’re here, I will have to give you the same abilities I have so that we will be on equal grounds.”

“How are you going to do that?” You look up at his face.

“I will bite you of course.”

[dvp95]

quiet on widow’s peak (8)

pairing: dan howell/phil lester, pj liguori/sophie newton/chris kendall rating: teen & up tags: paranormal investigator, mystery, online friendship, slow burn, strangers to lovers, nonbinary character, trans character, background poly, phil does some buzzfeed unsolved shit and dan is a fan word count: 3.3k (this chapter), 26.5k (total) summary: Phil’s got a list of paranormal experiences a mile long that he likes to share with the world. Abandoned buildings, cemeteries, and ghost stories have always called his name, and a particular fan of his has a really, really good ghost story.

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

It's a very long night. The quiet in the space between Phil and Chris where three people should be sleeping peacefully is making Phil's nerves feel stretched thin, like he can't settle. The wheel of worst case scenarios is off its axis completely; there is just one thing, one scenario, blaring in Phil's mind like an air raid siren.

What if they don't wake up? What if they're stuck like this, eyes wide and bodies stiff like boards? Phil never got the rest of that sleep paralysis story from Dan. He has no idea how it ended.

He's not usually afraid anymore, not about things that he deals with regularly in his line of work, but this is shaking him in a way few things ever have. He feels clammy, and he laments how his palm must feel against Dan's warm forehead.

“How long has it been?” Phil asks, his voice creaking like the floorboards.

“Few hours,” says Chris. There's no mask in place, just wariness and worry and a little bit of anger. Phil hopes that isn't directed at him - technically, he didn't even invite Chris or Sophie up here. It's probably a good thing that they are here, though, because he'd be so certain that he'd reached a breaking point of sanity if he were alone up here with a catatonic PJ. Instead, the tension between them is kickstarting Phil's anxiety over and over, revving it up like an engine that won't start.

It's not long after that exchange that PJ gasps, sitting up and scrabbling at his chest like he's trying to get something off of it. Phil could almost cry with relief.

Chris crawls over and takes PJ's hands in his, resting their foreheads together and attempting a shaky smile. It's so intimate that Phil has to look away, rove his gaze over Dan's pretty face and wait for them to wake, too.

“Fuck,” PJ is saying, his voice so shaky that Phil can almost feel it. “Fuck, fuck, that was - Chris, we can't stay here.”

“Shh, we'll leave soon,” Chris promises. “You okay?”

“Obviously I'm not fucking okay, am I?”

“No need to be a dick about it,” Chris says sharply. Now Phil really doesn't want to be present for this. “What the hell happened? You looked - you looked so frozen, Peej, it was awful.”

Another loud gasp, this one softer. Phil listens to Sophie try to get lungfuls of air and Chris torn between arguing with PJ and checking that she's okay. He trails his fingers down the side of Dan's face and presses them to their pulse point, because he's paranoid like that.

Dan's hand comes up to engulf Phil's, holding tight as they squeeze their eyes shut and turn their face into the floor.

“Hey,” Phil murmurs, turning his hand over so he can properly grip Dan's hand. “Hey, you alright in there? Not gonna throw up on me or anything, are you?”

Dan laughs weakly. “No. Fuck, that... that sucked.”

“Were you awake?” Phil asks, resisting the urge to keep running his fingers through Dan's hair now that they're conscious. They roll onto their back, holding Phil's hand to their chest, and take deep breaths.

“I was,” they say, quiet.

That sounds horrible. Phil has never experienced regular sleep paralysis, let alone one instigated by ghost stories and shared with practical strangers, but he's looked into it a little bit. He glances up to see how Sophie and PJ are handling things. They're murmuring amongst themselves while Chris starts to pack up their things, a furrow between his brows.

“Let's get out of here,” says Phil. He squeezes Dan's hand and Dan squeezes back, their chest heaving like they can't get enough air. “You guys okay to move yet?”

“Yeah,” Dan breathes. They sit up slowly, still gripping Phil’s hand. Phil gets both of them to their feet with only minor stumbling, steadying Dan with his hands on their waist. Dan doesn’t even seem to notice, let alone mind. “Fuck. Jesus. My head hurts so fucking bad, Phil.”

“Shh, I know,” Phil says, trying to emulate the tone his mum uses when he’s feeling poorly. Dan inhales shakily and leans into his touch like maybe it’s helping. Phil resists the urge to push their curls off their forehead again. “Let’s go.”

--

They’re piling things back into PJ’s car - after using the door to get out this time, because there’s no way Chris can manage getting three people out of the window, and Phil would drop someone - when Phil realises that Dan is just sort of standing on the pavement with their arms wrapped around themself again, chewing their lip.

“Hey,” says Phil. “Do you work today?”

Dan jolts like they’re surprised to be addressed. They have to think about it for a moment, but then they shake their head.

Before Phil can be the one to offer, PJ gestures at his car. “You’re coming with us, then. We’re gonna recuperate and compare experiences and all that junk.” He pauses. “Well, first, I want a nap. Are you okay to drive, Chris?”

“I can drive,” says Phil. PJ doesn’t dignify that with a response.

“I’m fine to drive,” Chris says, his voice still grim and a bit more genuine than Phil is used to hearing. He takes the keys from PJ, squeezing his hand in the same motion.

Sophie crawls into the backseat and puts her head between her knees. Phil can’t tell if she’s feeling sick still or if she’s napping in the most uncomfortable way possible, but he decides not to bother her. He watches Chris help PJ into the front seat and doesn’t bother protesting that Dan ought to sit in the front when their legs are the longest.

“You okay, love?” Chris asks Sophie. She gives him a thumbs up without raising her head.

Phil looks around for Dan, who hasn’t moved any closer to the car. They look hesitant and so young, suddenly, on the dark Rusholme street. Dawn hasn’t even broken yet. There’s no way in hell that Phil is leaving them here.

“Get in the car, Dan,” Phil says, quiet. “We can take you home if you don’t want to come back to mine, but I need you to get in.”

After another moment where Dan’s teeth dig into their lower lip, they finally nod and come forward. Phil holds the door open and waits for them to get in, messenger bag slung into their lap and knees comically high from how tall they are in the somewhat cramped backseat. Sophie is so small, but that doesn’t stop Phil’s thigh from pressing completely against Dan’s once he settles himself in as well.

They don’t even know each other, really, so Phil expects Dan to be put off by it. Instead, they sigh and lean a bit further into Phil’s space. By the time Chris has gotten them out of the city proper, their head is resting on Phil’s shoulder and their eyes are closed.

Phil can’t imagine that his bony shoulder is very comfortable, but considering Sophie’s snoring a bit in her ball of limbs and PJ has contorted into a weird position with his mouth wide open, maybe any pillow at all will do. Chris meets Phil’s eyes in the rearview and Phil grimaces at him. This is almost as concerning as the hours of waiting, as much as Phil tries to logic away the anxiety swirling inside him. Of course they’re tired - Phil is tired, too, and the bags under Chris’ eyes are even more prominent than usual.

He can’t help the worry, though. The same worry he’s been fighting all night: what if they don’t wake up?

Careful not to jostle Dan, Phil reaches down to press the tips of his fingers against the pulse point in their wrist. Just to make himself feel a bit better about it.

--

The weak sun has started to rise by the time they all clamber out of PJ’s car, and Phil is grateful for that. His dad, at least, should be awake in case the house is locked tight. His friends don’t look any less tired, but Chris has a mask back in place like it never wavered. Phil tries to do that, too, just in case his anxiety is burrowing through his skin and making his parents worry. He sees Dan looking around in vague bewilderment and makes a mental note to tell them where they’ve been kidnapped to.

Luckily, the doorknob turns when Phil tries it. He holds it open and lets everyone file in. Part of him wants to look them all over for signs of wear and tear and possible possession, but most of him just wants a shield between himself and his parents’ disappointed faces.

Sure enough, his dad comes out of the kitchen as they’re all taking off their shoes, his arms crossed over his chest.

“Morning, sir,” Chris says, the charm in his voice alarmingly good considering Phil knows he’s freaking out at least a little bit.

“Good morning, Christopher,” Phil’s dad says. His expression doesn’t change when he looks over the group, but Phil knows in his gut that he’s noticing Dan’s shirt-dress and makeup. He has no idea what his dad thinks about it. He also realises, to some degree of detached surprise, that he doesn’t particularly care. “You’ve multiplied.”

Dan flushes. It seems like they don’t know what to say, but Chris is on the ball.

“Just adopted a stray,” he laughs quietly. He takes Sophie by the wrist and pulls her gently along, past Phil’s dad. “Been up all night, though, Nige, so I hope you don’t mind us copping a snooze.”

“By all means,” Phil’s dad says, this time with a small smile that Phil is pretty sure everybody else thinks is genuine.

PJ follows with a sheepish little wave and Dan hesitates, clearly unsure what they should do now. Phil smiles at them and hopes it looks more sincere than his dad’s does. “Just go upstairs,” he murmurs, gesturing at his friends’ backs. “You can sleep in my room at the end of the hall - or with Chris in the guest, if you’d like.”

He doesn’t mention that he’s pretty sure Chris won’t be in the guest room, because he has enough to explain to his father already.

“Okay,” says Dan, quiet. They bite their lip and duck their head as they pass Phil’s dad.

As soon as the entry is empty of Phil’s little gaggle of awkward adults, the silence feels so much worse. Phil bends over to untie his boots and try to settle his heart, which isn’t at all working normally.

There’s a very pointed pause where they both wait for the other to say something first, but Phil breaks first. He always does.

“Look, we’re fine,” he starts.

“You don’t seem fine, Philip,” his dad says, and oh, god, if the full name is getting pulled out this early then he’s in for quite the talking-to. “You all look like you’ve been on some kind of drug binge, stumbling ‘round like that. I knew you would be trespassing last night and you already know I wasn’t very happy with that, but I figured you’d at least come home all pleased with yourself.”

“We had a bit of a scare is all,” says Phil. He kicks off his shoes and stands up. His stomach is rolling with that familiar stress of letting the people down who love him most, but it’s backed by the steel stubbornness he inherited from them. “It’s my job, dad.”

“Is it,” his dad says, flatly.

Phil sighs and hangs his jacket up on the coat hook that his friends had smartly bypassed to get to safety. “Yes. It is. I make decent money doing this, you know that.”

“I do.” Great, now his dad has resorted to short, dry responses. It’s designed to get Phil to start rambling, trying to fill that godawful pressurizing silence, and sometimes that works. Phil has had this conversation so many times that he knows there isn’t anything new he or his dad could say to each other on the topic, though, and he’s so tired and so worried that he just shrugs.

“So, there you have it,” says Phil. “May I be excused?”

When his dad sighs, Phil has the thought that it sounds just like Martyn. Irritated but still that unbreakable affection underneath it, that solid bedrock that Phil relies on. Even when he and his family don’t see eye to eye on things, there’s never any doubt in that love.

“Get some rest, Phil,” his dad says, quiet and on that edge of disappointment that Phil tries so hard to avoid.

Phil nods and shoves his hands in his pockets so he doesn’t reach out for a hug on his way to the stairs. The last thing he needs right now is to have a complete breakdown in his dad’s arms. If anything is going to get his parents to start actively campaigning for him to leave Brighton instead of just hinting at it every few months, it would be that.

Neither of them really love what he does. They love him, and always will, but they’re nervous about the laws that Phil breaks and the supernatural things that Phil actively invites into his life. He wonders if it would be easier or more difficult if they were skeptics.

Phil is so lost in thought that he forgets someone is waiting in his room until he closes the door behind him.

“Oh,” he says, blinking.

“Sorry,” Dan says immediately. They’re sitting on the edge of Phil’s old bed with muscles so tense that it looks like they’re about to jump up and run at the first sign of trouble. “I just - I don’t know, I feel so stupid, I just didn’t want to be alone, and -”

“It’s okay,” Phil tells them, holding up his hands like he’s trying to calm a scared animal. “I don’t want to be alone, either. That was pretty fucking scary.”

The stiff position of Dan’s shoulders relax forward and they nod, picking at a loose thread in their flannel. “Yeah it, uh. Kind of was.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“I don’t know,” says Dan.

“Do you want to borrow something to sleep in?”

Dan blinks up at Phil, looking more surprised than Phil thinks is warranted. He’s been an alright host, all things considered, and he isn’t about to make Dan sleep in jeans and a face full of product. “Um. Okay.”

“We’re about the same size,” Phil says, well aware that he’s rambling to fill the silence in a way he didn’t let himself be baited into downstairs. He grabs his bag from the corner he’d kicked it into earlier and grabs a couple of t-shirts, a pair of joggers, and his bright flannel pyjama pants. He always overpacks when he plans to be spending a night or two in allegedly haunted places, because he’s had the unfortunate experience of getting mud on his clothes in a leaky basement and then just having to live with that.

He tosses the options to Dan and tells them to choose as he searches for a notebook. He wants to get his experience down on paper before he sleeps and the sharp edges of it start to fade.

“Bathroom’s next door,” he thinks to say as he digs. “Mum probably has some makeup, er, wipes? In the medicine cabinet.”

“Thank you,” Dan says softly.

Their footsteps are quiet and so is the door that closes behind them. Phil finds something to scrawl in and tries to ignore the way his fingers are shaking.

He manages to get everything on paper, from the feeling of hundreds of eyes to the bathroom lights flickering to how awful it was to watch his friends stare, unseeing, into the middle distance for hours on end.

Phil doesn't completely believe in ghosts, not the way his parents or PJ do, but this… yeah, he's going to give this one to the Manchester students.

Dan still hasn't come back when Phil puts the notebook away, so he changes at lightspeed into his ugly flannel pants and spends a few minutes considering whether or not he should move his pillow to the wall side of the bed or leave it where it is. He's overthinking this, he knows he is. He shares bed space with his friends often enough that this isn't a totally foreign thing for him, but Dan is such a new friend - with unreasonably pretty eyes and unreasonably big hands - that it's making Phil's stomach flutter with nerves.

He's finally given up on the whole thinking thing and gotten into bed when the door opens and Dan tiptoes in with a bundle of clothes under their arm.

“Oh,” they say, stopping in their tracks, and Phil almost laughs at the reaction mirroring his own when he came in. “Sorry, I didn't expect you to still be up. Er, I ran into your mum. She's really nice.”

Phil groans. He should have expected his mum to be prowling around to corner his friends. “God, sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, she’s lovely,” says Dan. They look around the room, a bit awkward, before setting their clothes on top of the dresser. “Your room is nice.”

“It’s not really mine anymore,” Phil says, doing his level best to keep the bitterness out of his voice. He knows it isn’t the healthiest thing, to be so bothered by the beige carpet and white walls and neutral furnishings, but he can’t help himself. He’s never been comfortable with big changes.

He looks at Dan while Dan is distracted by a family photo on the wall. Their bare face looks so young that, if Phil didn’t already know how old they were, he’d think they were in sixth form or something. Phil’s clothes fit them well, just a bit tighter around the shoulders and stomach than they are on him. They look - cute, is the thing, and Phil stamps down on his sleep-deprived crushing nonsense.

“Coming to bed?” Phil asks, immediately making a face. The phrasing is accidental but, really, more Freudian than he cares to admit.

Dan laughs, so maybe it’s okay.

They dimple and climb over him instead of asking him to move, which has Phil holding his breath. They smell like mint and spice and Phil’s own laundry detergent and as they flop onto their back, their arm overlaps with Phil’s a bit. The bed isn’t small, and even though they’re both quite large humans, Phil is pretty sure they don’t have to be touching.

“You okay?” Dan asks, quiet. Phil doesn’t turn to look at them, because he doesn’t trust himself to have those hypnotizing brown eyes so close while they’re horizontal.

“I will be,” Phil tells the ceiling. “Are you?”

“Kinda. Is it always like that?”

Phil huffs a laugh and lets his pinky and ring fingers curl around Dan’s hand, doing his best to ignore the way his heart races at the action. “It’s never like that,” he murmurs. “That was terrifying and I’m going to have nightmares and, also, the video is going to be buckwild.”

“I forgot we were even filming one,” Dan laughs. “Is that weird?”

“This whole thing is a little weird, Dan,” says Phil. He feels his lips curving up and he lets go of Dan’s hand to take his glasses off. “Do you want the light off?”

It takes a moment, but Dan does respond with a soft, sheepish, “No. Do you mind?”

“I don’t mind,” Phil says honestly. He curls up on his side and tries to even out his breathing. His anxiety and crush and sleep deprivation are all coordinating to make his mind race, but he’s so very, very tired. He feels Dan’s warmth, just behind him, and that helps. After only a little inner turmoil, Phil is able to fall asleep.

[plumeriafairy14]

Oni!Hanzo/Undead!McCree

Just something fun I thought about while on the way to work today. I really love the new Undead Skin so I thought, hey, might as well make a romance story about it! 

- Set in the early 1900s in a small town in the middle of nowhere.

- The town was ruled by a corrupt mayor who pockets the taxes and shit like that.

- The sheriff was a righteous man named Jesse McCree.

- Jesse McCree, while patrolling one night, meets an odd creature. He introduces himself as Hanzo, a demon from the far east who has traveled in search of redemption for murdering his whole clan after they made him murder his own brother.

- The two develop a friendship over drinks and moon watching. Hanzo tells McCree of his travels and McCree tells him about his dreams of seeing this backwater town flourish.

- The fall in love.

- They bond over comfort. Hanzo opens up about his sin and why he was cursed while McCree opens up about how he used to be an outlaw in his youth and how it still haunts him even after he decided to turn over a new leaf.

- One night, Hanzo tells him that he must leave to travel north for a personal quest. They part ways in the night with a tender kiss holding the promise of Hanzo returning to McCree once his business in the north was done.

- The mayor of the town does sleazy business with some outlaws and bandits. But McCree finds out about it and the mayor frames him for a crime he did not commit and sentences him to be hanged.

- McCree pleads his innocence but it falls into deaf ears. The people he knew he could trust, the very law that he considers his creed, all turned their backs at him. He was filled with anger and bitter disappointment.

- His last words before he was hung were: “Y’all ‘gon regret this.” 

- The platform underneath his feet swings open and the rope snaps, breaking his neck and suffocating him. 

- Hanzo returns a few days later and finds McCree’s rotting corpse strewn up on a tree. There was a sign nailed on the trunk which said; “Outlaw.”

- The shock render Hanzo motionless as he stared up at his executed lover. McCree’s body was left out to rot because the town did not even given him a proper burial. Instead, he was left out to hang like a morbid decoration; a warning. His left hand was even cut off and nailed on the tree to display the Deadlock tattoo McCree took care to hide.

- Hanzo stood there motionless for a whole day until some of the townspeople noticed. An angry mob formed to kill the demon guarding the sheriff’s corpse, believing that McCree’s death has cursed the town. 

- Surrounded, Hanzo moves and he slowly turns to them, his eyes flaring in anger. Hanzo eliminates the whole town in his furious rage, wiping it off the map.

- After he had calmed down, he took the moment to mourn McCree. He cuts his body down from the tree, cleans the corpse and makes a salve to preserve McCree’s body as best as he could. 

- Now alone in his grief, he cries for the first time in centuries. He swore that he will bring him back no matter what the cost.

- Wrapping the body, Hanzo carries the load and dutifully travels back to the north of the country where the days were short and the nights were long and the snows were bitter in the winter to speak with The Witch that lived there.

- The Witch agrees to revive McCree but in return, Hanzo must render a full century of servitude to her. He is free to do what he wished but once the Witch summons him, he must obey or she will take back the life she infused in McCree.

- Hanzo swallows his pride which had been patted down after centuries of solitude.. He had suffered long enough, what is another century? Besides, having McCree by his side will make it bearable.

- The Witch revives McCree as a creature that is the living dead. But he isn’t himself. He was monstrous, craving for flesh. He lunges at Hanzo and bites him but stumbles back with an anguish scream after Hanzo’s demonic blood burns him like acid. Turns out he can’t eat Hanzo, lol. (oh thank god)

- The Witch tells him to speak with the Undertaker, a man named Gabriel Reyes, to ask for a freshly buried body that no one will miss. Gabriel gives him the body and Hanzo feeds it to McCree who devours it. After days of recuperating, McCree returns to himself. He remembers his past and what happened to him except for some lapses in his memory as a side effect of the Witch’s spell.

- THE UNDEAD/DEMON HUSBANDS ARE REUNITED AND THEY’RE BOTH THE WITCH’S HENCHMEN (Since McCree volunteered for a century too)

- Hanzo loves McCree even if he smells a little...weird. They love to kiss and cuddle. It’s a good contrast since Hanzo’s body temperature is fucking hot and McCree’s is freezing so they balance each other out. 

- McCree: “If my heart was still beatin’, you know it’d beat for ‘ya, darlin’.” Hanzo: “Do not sway me with flowery words, Jesse.” (is secretly tsundere)

- Thankfully, Angela’s rez magic is so good that McCree doesn’t rot and fall apart. 

- They live as happy as vigilantes with dark pasts could be. Hanzo is still seeking redemption and McCree has some major issues with injustice so they kill bad people and McCree gets free food. The Witch supplies him with glamor potions to help pass him up as human and hide the funky smell (lol). Hanzo doesn’t need it since he can glam himself to look human with his demon powers.

That’s pretty much it. What do you thin? I have zero time and motivation to write a whole fic about it but please feel free to play around a bit with it, just please give credit! 

[symbrock-darling]

Hiya! I’ve read your drabbles and short little fics and I loved them! I was wondering if you could write a Drabble about Eddie and Venom meet the Avengers, or if not, could you point me in the direction of fics like that? Thanks!!

I couldn’t think of a better time to share this fic @mydoggoesnom requested so long ago than now, now that Avengers: Endgame’s trailer has finally dropped (finally). I didn’t tackle Eddie and Venom meeting all of the Avengers, but I thought Eddie might do well if he met another San Fran local. Enjoy!

Rating: T

Word Count: ~1700

Title: See You Around

Eddie was enjoying a beer at the bar after a very, very long day tracking down leads, uncovering a corrupt official and then having to deal with his enhanced bodyguard – a guy who’d done everything he could to be a pain in the ass and generally give both he and Venom a run for their money. They’d won and after turning them into the authorities, it was well into the evening. Venom was dozing at the back of Eddie’s mind as he drank, and seemed wildly content to recuperate while Eddie watched the news.

As always these days, the news was filled with villains and heroes and anything anyone could scrounge up about the Avengers. But in San Francisco, he was interested to find that not only had they made the news since someone managed to catch a small clip of them as they’d streaked away in a black, glossy blur, but also that they hadn’t been the only ones active today either. Turned out Ant-Man had been busy too. The reports were unclear about what exactly had happened, but there he was, big as a house. And here Eddie thought he and Venom lacked subtlety.

A dark-haired man groaned in relief as he settled beside Eddie in the only seat left in the bar, and he watched the guy smile and flag down the bartender. A moment later a beer appeared before him, and the look of utter delight that crossed his face matched the one Eddie had given not too long ago.

“Long day at the office?”

“The worst,” the stranger said dramatically before he paused and amended, “Well, maybe not the worst. But it was long, let me tell you.”

“I hear you, pal. I had a long one myself. I’m Eddie.”

“Scott." 

Scott glanced up at the news where it had just cycled back to the Ant-Man story. He smirked and nodded at it. "Crazy huh?”

“Yeah, news is pretty insane these days,” Eddie agreed. “Avengers, size-changing men, superpowers, aliens. What’s next?”

“You want to know what I heard today? About what he was fighting?” Scott said, nodding toward the TV where Ant-Man was still the center of attention. Scott leaned closer. “Shape-changer. That thing could turn into practically anything. There?” Scott waggled a finger at the screen where helicopter footage caught Ant-Man stumbling back from something impossible to see from the angle. “It turned into an elephant. An elephant!”

“Eh, that’s nothing. That guy,” Eddie uncurled his index finger where it was wrapped around his bottle to point at the TV which had cycled back to Venom. “Dealt with a firestarter today.” Eddie mimicked the way the firestarter had produced flames from his hands earlier, complete with sound effects. “Fire everywhere.”

“Ugh, fire’s the worst, especially here in California. If firestarters want to play somewhere, the least they could do is have the decency to go somewhere that’s not going to burn everything? It’s not like Ant-Man and whoever that is on the screen are carrying around tons of water.” Scott made a contemplative face. “Can that guy do that?”

“What? Him? Venom?” Eddie laughed at the thought. “No, I don’t think so. Just super strength. Durability. Tentacles. At least, that’s what I hear.”

Scott’s eyes widened and he leaned toward Eddie, voice dropping. “That’s Venom? And tentacles? That thing’s a genuine tentacle monster?” He covered his mouth and the amused, horrified smile growing there. “Things really are crazy these days, aren’t they?”

Eddie opened his mouth, thought better of it, then said, “Maybe they’re more like tendrils?”

“Maybe. Seems like semantics though,” Scott said with a chuckle before he took a sip of his beer. “Wonder what it’s like to be that guy? Tentacles, dear lord.”

“I hear they’re pretty useful,” Eddie replied casually. “I mean, in comparison to Ant-Man who’s always stumbling around because of his size and everything, can’t be too bad. Venom’s versatile and fast.”

Scott waved a hand. “It’s only because of Ant-man’s size that he’s so slow. Can you imagine being that big? That’s a lot of mass to move around. Not to mention there’re buildings and people – man, so many people, they’re like, everywhere. Must be tough for him.”

"They’re always in the way,” Eddie added with a chuckle of his own. “Even when they’re told to leave. At least, that’s how it seems when I watch the news.”

“Right?” A wide smile crossed Scott’s lips. “But, I mean, come on. It’s not like Ant-Man’s not trying. It’s hard – it looks hard, I mean – being that size. Better when he’s smaller. Like, honestly.”

“Ant-Man can get smaller?” Eddie paused, listening to himself. “Guess that’s why he’s called Ant-Man.”

“Yeah, and he’s way faster. And stronger.”

“Can’t be stronger than Venom,” Eddie couldn’t help but say with a grin. “You have to see that guy. He’s intense.”

Scott made a face. “Seems kind of wild to me. From what I’ve heard, there are even rumors that he eats people. Can you believe that?”

Eddie made a face and smiled while he sipped the last of his beer. Yes, he could, in fact, believe it.

“Who knows?” Eddie said instead. “And if it is true, no one’s perfect. He only eats bad guys, from what I hear. Like, really bad guys. I mean with Ant-Man I’ve heard the civil damages alone are stacking, especially since he learned how to get big.”

Scott sniffed. “Didn’t learn anything. And like I said earlier, being big’s hard – got to be hard, I mean. And draining. And it’s not like he’s had a lot of special training or lots of money or anything like that. Maybe he’s just, I don’t know, an average joe making it all up as he’s going, doing the best he can? Bet Venom can’t say anything like that. Bet he’s got money out the wazoo.”

“Wouldn’t surprise me if he was just as average,” Eddie sighed, wishing he had money out the wazoo. “Just some Joe too. Can’t all be Starks, you know?”

“Or Pyms,” Scott added drawing from his bottle again. “I’m glad you get it, Eddie. No one else I know really just gets it. Well, except for my daughter.”

“That’s sweet,” Eddie said.

Scott smiled. “Yeah, it is.”

“You know what I think?” said the guy on the other side of Eddie, and they both glanced the eavesdropper’s way. “I think they’re both idiots. They make more of a mess trying to save people than actually doing any real good. Sure, someone’s alive, but can you think of all the money it’s going to take to rebuild everything they destroy afterward? Because I can, and let me tell you, it’s not cheap. They should think before they act.”

After the day Eddie had had and all the people they’d saved – who admittedly had been terrified by them, but also relieved and thankful – the last thing he wanted to do was listen to this guy.

“So, these heroes should just let people die?” he asked.

“Money’s more important than saving lives?” Scott added, a hard look in his eyes. “Those guys are putting their lives on the line to keep people safe.”

“That’s what the police are for,” the naysayer said. “They should just leave it to the professionals.”

“And if the professionals can’t get there in time?” Eddie reasoned, trying to control his anger as he thought about Drake. “What if the professionals aren’t able to get through the red tape and actually do something about it?”

“I’m not saying there aren’t problems with the system,” the guy said. “Just that we shouldn’t have vigilantes breaking everything and deciding what’s right, then leaving before they can be held accountable.”

“Tell that to the people they save,” both he and Scott said at the same time. They eyed each other, but Eddie looked back when the guy harrumphed, grabbed his drink and moved to the other end of the bar where another spot had opened up.

“What an asshole,” Scott said.

“No kidding,” Eddie said. “Let him put on a suit and see what he does.”

“Right?”

They both laughed, but in the wake of the exchange something nudged at Eddie’s mind, and suddenly he couldn’t help but look – really look – at Scott. He looked tired, but then most people here did so it didn’t mean that much. What was interesting however were the bruise marks on his hands and palms. The purple smear just visible under the collar of his shirt on his shoulder. A place the Ant-Man on the screen had fallen on when he’d been shoved to the ground.

Now that there was a pause in the conversation, he noticed that Scott was looking at him too, eyes subtly searching. The reporter in Eddie wondered just how right his growing suspicions were, even as Scott’s brow pinched slightly too.

Eddie, Venom said, breaking through his thoughts, the alien’s voice thick and tired as if he’d just risen out of his doze. Are you done? You said one beer, and it’s been two. Let’s go home. We need to sleep.

Uh, right. Yeah, Eddie said telepathically before he gave his head a tiny shake. They had been here a while, and he had promised his symbiote that he wouldn’t be long. And maybe, this once, he wouldn’t let his inner reporter out. Let’s go, then.

Venom curled within him, radiating contentment at the news that they were finally going home. After flagging down the bartender and settling up, he stood.

“Well, it’s been fun, Scott, but I’ve got someone who wants me home. You know how it is.” Eddie patted Scott’s shoulder as he passed by. “See you around.”

“See you around.”

Scott lifted his beer and smiled before returning his attention back to the news where his lips curled ever so slightly at the sight of Ant-Man on the screen. Despite what Eddie might suspect, there was no point in digging.

And so he walked out of the bar and resolved that if they as Venom ever did run into Ant-Man one day, he’d invite him out for another beer.

[magioftheseas]

Welcome Home

Summary: The remnants are given the opportunity to help future foundation in secret, and Hinata is throwing himself into a lot of exhausting and time-consuming missions, lasting a few months at best. Komaeda is still considered too unstable to accompany him, so they can only contact each other about once a week via phone, but they make do with it. After an especially exhausting week he is given some free time for a good job, and as an extra surprise he finds that Komaeda is waiting for him.

Rating: E

Warnings: It’s smut. Top!Hinata. Vanilla smut, but smut nonetheless. They decide to forgo condoms. That’s not safe.

Notes: This is a commission for @freakysandra1995 and the summary is the prompt they gave me. Good setup! Hopefully the payoff is also good. Lol. Okay that’s a pretty lame joke and I’m very sorry. Please enjoy! I hope you like it! If you’re in the mood for fluffy smut, maybe check this fic out? :3

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

“So how are things? Do you feel accomplished now that you’re done with your latest mission?”

“Hnnnnnnnnnnngh.”

“Oh, dear,” Komaeda giggles lightly and breathily. “Sounds like you really need that break, Hinata-kun. Last time you at least managed a few syllables.”

“...yeah.” He can only sigh, pinching at the bridge of his nose as he rubbed away his throbbing headache. “It was beyond fucking ridiculous, Nagito. The project was plagued with bad luck that almost rivaled yours. I don’t know who or what was cursed but between the bad weather, the flimsy materials, people getting sick, and a million things needing to get done... I feel like my head’s about to burst so that Kamukura Izuru can crawl out to escape the madness.”

And at that, his head stung so bad like something was scratching through the lobes of his brain from the inside.

“Uuuuurgh...!”

“Aah.” Komaeda sounded sympathetic, at least. “That must’ve been rough. Oh, I experienced quite horrible bad luck today too!”

Hinata blinked at that, leaning towards the phone, closer to the lilt of his lover’s laughter. “Yeah?”

“A seagull stole my breakfast! Twice! I had to chase it for what felt like miles! What a wretched bird!”

Hinata snorted.

“That’s not bad luck, that’s your own fault. I told you not to feed the seagulls on the island, but you kept doing it. Now whenever they see you with food, they’re gonna think it’s for them.”

He doesn’t have to see Komaeda to know he’s pouting with the way he grumbles on the other line. Despite that, he does perk at the words that he had only been able to decipher because he paid such close attention even now.

“...it’s definitely bad luck.”

“It’s trained animal behavior,” Hinata said.

“It’s definitely bad luck, Hinata-kun!”

“Geez, don’t argue.”

“It’s the truth! If you don’t believe me, fine.” Komaeda huffed. “But, I might not share my good luck with you afterwards. It’s so cruel of you to doubt your insecure lover. I thought you said I should have more faith in myself?”

“I... Of course you should.” Dammit, Nagito, those are some dirty fucking tactics, but...

He couldn’t help but smile, even with a wince.

“You absolutely should have more faith in yourself. My Nagito’s not just incredibly smart, he’s got great intuition.” Hinata sighed almost wistfully. “So smart. So handsome. Just how did I get so lucky?”

“Stop that; I’m supposed to be mad at you!”

“Please don’t be mad,” he pleaded, even as his smile grew. “I’m sorry, Nagito! You were right and I was wrong, it was definitely bad luck, please forgive your imperfect love—!”

And then Komaeda hung up on him. Sudden enough to make him flinch, smile dropping and pain still buzzing in his skull. Hinata pulls away from the phone, blinking, staring at the CALL END flashing on the screen before it shuts off.

Unsurprisingly, his headache flares up. And then, a text.

“Drink water!”

Hinata exhaled but pushed himself up anyway to go do just that.

It was going to be another long and lonely night.

--

With as much as he complained, things really weren’t that difficult. With Kamukura’s talents, he could complete any task efficiently no matter how much the universe among other things pushed back. Truth be told, he was grateful for things to be progressing like this.

The more he got done for the Future Foundation, the better things got for everyone. The world and their lives were being rebuilt. That, above all else, was more than enough reason to keep pushing through.

It was just—lonely.

He barely spoke with Naegi’s group anymore. He barely spoke with his friends, considering they were all also busy either with recovery or rebuilding. And Komaeda—god, he missed Komaeda.

Komaeda may have wished him off with a smile, may have smiled even when told that he was too risky to accompany his own boyfriend, but things were so lonely without him in particular.

The tasks weren’t difficult. The people weren’t difficult, even as they sometimes appraised him with uncertainty and the occasional suspicion. Given how secretive his presence was supposed to be, Hinata couldn’t exactly make friends. Truth be told, he didn’t much mind that.

But not having Komaeda, who drooled on him while he slept and one time burned soup when trying to surprise him with breakfast in bed—it was...rough.

So many people looked at his Nagito and saw a ticking time bomb. For several months, Komaeda Nagito helped keep him grounded. Komaeda Nagito had taunted him, tormented him, and then had taken his hand with a steadying squeeze and a calming smile.

Without the help of that person, he knows that he would’ve lost himself in those months.

And that person had been deemed to big a risk to be with him.

Sometimes, life really was unfair. But they still made things work. They talked every week, they laughed, sometimes, they’d chat until someone fell asleep. Things weren’t the best, but they weren’t unpleasant, either.

Still, Hinata missed him. He missed him a lot.

So much so that he was certain no one could comprehend the extent of it.

--

There were still things to do. Damage control, check-ins, test runs, protocol, procedures, check, discuss, check, inquires, check, and oh, the weather was going to be bad again.

A fire catches in the district over. For a hot minute, Hinata wants his district to burn, too.

It’s put out quickly, so the damage done is minimal. But damage is still a setback.

More hours wasted.

But eventually, it gets done. Hinata accepts the news mutely and vacantly.

He’s not sure what face he’s making, but whatever it is, it makes his superiors grimace and then—

“You should take some time off before your next mission. Take this time to recuperate. We’ll contact you later.”

The smile Hinata gave might’ve terrified them. But like hell he could care.

--

The district he stays in is unsurprisingly isolated from others. There are other staff members who live in the houses nearby, but otherwise, the so-called neighborhood is largely empty. And it’s comparatively low quality compared to other housing areas for actual Future Foundation members.

There’s no point in complaining. He should be grateful he’s even here.

He’s told himself this constantly, droning it in Kamukura Izuru’s dull, unconvincing tone. He can’t even convince himself that Komaeda would say these things. Komaeda would definitely turn his nose up at a place like this.

Hinata sighed as he fished out his usual key, attached to a keychain with a tiny, tacky metal skull. And then, he froze, hearing some rustling.

...someone’s in the house.

Someone with very familiar steps and a very familiar hum.

Hinata almost knocks the door off its hinges trying to get inside.

“Nagito?!”

“Welcome home, dear!” Komaeda turns to him with a beam, duster in hand, apron tied around his waist, handkerchief tied around his neck. He waves with a few mechanical whirls of his robotic hand. “I was hoping to get the cleaning done before you arrived, but...! You’re here earlier than I expected! Is that good luck or bad luck?”

“G... Guh...”

A million tasks he can organize with this warped brain of his and it’s in this moment where the clumsy thing has started to short-circuit.

Because it’s Komaeda. Komaeda who he hasn’t seen in a while, who’s in this house that he’s used to being hollow and lonely.

Komaeda, whose smile widens while his head tilts.

“Hmm? Which is it, Hinata-kun?”

Hinata practically lurches forward, uncaring of the dirt as his arms wrapped around Nagito tightly and securely, squeezing just enough to make sure it wasn’t a dream.

“Good luck,” he gasps out. “It’s definitely...definitely good luck.”

“Aah, is that so?” With a laugh, Komaeda embraces him in return. “Well, then I’m very glad to see you.”

“Me too,” Hinata breathed, running his fingers through his hair and inhaling the scent of dust and dried flowers. “God, I—I’m home.”

--

Komaeda makes him tea and finishes up the cleaning. He refuses Hinata’s help, and that’s just as well. Just watching Komaeda clean is something Hinata accepts greedily after not seeing him for so long.

Too long.

He’s still so pale. But he’s put on some weight. Thank god. I was worried about his appetite.

“...they finally let you leave the island?”

“Not for very long,” Komaeda said, sighing. “Less than a week. Truth be told, I thought I’d barely get to see you with how busy you can be, so there realistically wouldn’t be much gained from going, but...” He shrugged. “I wanted to see you. Things back on the islands are so—boring. Uneventful. And you were what largely made things bearable.”

“I see...” Hinata rubbed at his nape. “Well, you’re in luck. I got a break, so—I think I’ll be able to spend all that time with you.”

“Did people die?” Komaeda’s eyes were considerably wide.

“...No.”

But they had gotten injured. Hinata helped treat some of them.

Let’s not think about that.

“...I really had missed you, Nagito.”

Komaeda smiles broadly, eyes sparkling.

“And I you.”

He finishes cleaning, humming as he does, and Hinata gets up.

“I should make us dinner,” he said. “Nagito, you’ve eaten lunch, right?”

“You don’t waste time, do you?” Komaeda asked good-naturedly. “I ate rations on the way here.”

“That’s not much. I’ll cook up something more than that.”

Komaeda giggles into his hand.

“Just don’t push yourself.”

--

With their weekly phone calls, there wasn’t much to talk about over dinner. Despite that, the two of them talked easily as they always had. Komaeda would laugh at Hinata’s more sardonic remarks and Hinata watched and listened intently as Komaeda prattled on about the books he’s been reading.

It’s not just once that he thinks about how much he missed seeing Komaeda’s face like this, especially with how Komaeda talks enthusiastically with his hands, how his eyes are alit, how those white curls bounced with how he either nodded or shook his head furiously. How Komaeda blushes radiantly when Hinata chuckles at him, and then how he puffs his cheeks like a blowfish which just makes Hinata laugh more at how adorable he looks.

Ah. His breath catches briefly when Komaeda does get truly flustered, fiddling with his fingers, red blossoming to his ears.

It’s been too long.

He watches intently as Komaeda washes their dishes, and his gaze sweeps downwards. Komaeda’s nape, his slim back, slimmer waist, the swelling curvature of his rump and thighs.

Hinata inhales sharply.

The back of his knees, his calves—

I really, really missed him.

“Ah, Hinata-kun?” Somehow, he’s already gotten up. Somehow, he’s already taking Komaeda’s wrist, and right now, he’s pressing kisses along his fingers and knuckles. Komaeda’s cheeks glow pink, and then, he laughs. “You don’t waste time, do you?”

Komaeda is practically pinned to the counter as Hinata kisses him deeply, fingers stroking his jaw and threading through his hair.

“That’s okay,” Komaeda murmurs, letting out a soft gasp as Hinata kisses down his jaw, his neck, nibbling at the sensitive skin. Komaeda melts into his touch with a sigh. “I’ve...definitely fingered myself on the way here in anticipation of seeing you after so long...”

Fuck.

He hoists Komaeda up and quickly carries him off without another word. Komaeda clings and giggles all the while, whispering sweet nothings into his ear and causing his steps to quicken.

--

“How’s your hand? It seems to be whirling alright.”

“It’s good enough to jerk you off, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“I-I’m not...!” He bit his tongue and then shoved him back onto the bed, crawling over him and tugging at his own shirt collar. “Geez, you’re just too much.”

Komaeda gives him a coy look as he lies there. Ivory lashes flutter at him, and Komaeda reaches up to deftly undo Hinata’s buttons with his mechanical hand. When his shirt open, Komaeda pressed his hands against that bare chest, squeezing and running his fingers down the contours. Hinata shivered at that; Komaeda’s eyelashes lowered.

“You’re even more built than before with all the work they have you do...” Komaeda purred, squeezing his hips. “That said, you are taking care of your dietary needs right? Hydrating yourself properly? Maybe performing certain acts of stress relief?”

Hinata takes his wrists and pins him down.

“Is that what you think this is, Nagito?”

Komaeda smiles up at him serenely.

“Who knows?”

“I’d like to know.”

Komaeda laughs, squirming playfully as Hinata undresses him. He tries to kiss him a few times as a distraction, which works, but only briefly as Hinata discards all articles of clothing swiftly and unceremoniously off his person.

“So impatient...!” Komaeda stops however, entranced as Hinata strips himself next, tossing his shirt aside and tugging down his pants and underwear. Komaeda swallows. “I... Oh... Wow...”

Heat pools in Hinata’s cheeks from embarrassment and satisfaction. Despite that, he’s quick to ogle Komaeda just as much in return.

He’s still so pale. So lithe.

“You need more sunlight, Nagito,” he murmurs, squeezing a thigh. It’s full and plush, and Komaeda meets his flickering stare with a small smile.

Komaeda leans in, and whispers into his ear, “I plan on it, Hinata-kun.”

Hinata’s blush darkens, but he snorts. “That’s a pretty lame comeback. I’m not the same thing as sunlight.”

Komaeda puffed his cheeks and flicks his nose.

“No sense of romance!” he exclaimed. “Namesake aside, you really are like the sun, you know.”

Arms loop around his neck and pull him close.

“Blinding and warm, it’s because of you that I’m even alive...”

Soft smoothed lips briefly met his own. Aah, Komaeda put on lip balm. Generic brand. Lemon flavored.

“You make the world brighter, clearer, and everything just revolves around you,” Komaeda chuckles, nipping at his lower lip. “Warm, secure, safe... Radiance... Sometimes a bit fiery... Yep. It’s a really fitting family name you have.” Thin fingers brush through the spikes on the back of his neck, the tips cold enough to evoke a light shiver. “Hinata Hajime. I really do love that name of yours.”

He’s said as much before, and it’s no less flustering to hear again.

“Y-Yours is pretty good too, Nagito. Nagito.” Despite that, his racing heart wouldn’t calm at all. “Ah, Nn... Nagito...”

Komaeda kisses him firmly, tongue flickering against him, and pulled away with a wet smack between their lips. With those milky gray-green eyes twinkling up at him as Komaeda’s lashes fluttered, Hinata heard his own heartbeat like the pounding of a drum.

He leans in, and kisses Komaeda’s forehead. Then, his cheek. His ear. His jaw. His neck. His shoulder. His sternum.

Komaeda’s cold to the touch, and he stiffens under his roaming hands.

“So warm,” he bites out, wheezing as he does. He shudders as Hinata plays with his nipples. “A-Ah...!”

“You’re just too sensitive,” Hinata mumbled. He flicks at them, watching with a darkening gaze as the buds swelled and hardened. Rosy against fair white, he can’t help but lean in to nip and tease the buds with his tongue and teeth.

Komaeda immediately squirms, gasping before mewling as Hinata sucks. When he pulls away, a grin twists at his lips.

“Look,” he says fondly and adoringly. “You’re hard down here, too.”

Komaeda sticks out his lower lip.

“That’s expectable,” he retorted. “You should’ve known that would happen.”

“Yeah, I did. But it’s still nice to see.” Hinata nuzzled his cheek. “Seeing you turned on is really gratifying, Nagito.”

“Why?” Komaeda asked quietly. “Because it’s good for the ego?”

...Hm.

Hinata’s fingers wrap around the base of his cock and begin to stroke upwards. Already, the head is beading with clear fluid. Komaeda inhales, exhales, rosy cheeks darkening.

“That’s part of it,” he admits, taking in that face, meeting those glimmering, needy gray-greens. “But mostly... I just like that I can make you feel good like this.”

Komaeda moans at his ministrations. It’s so erotic that it’s unbearable.

Unbearable. No. I should use a different word. Unendurable, maybe?

“H-Hinata-kun...!”

“It’s been too long,” he found himself saying, blinking at him and twisting his wrist, jerking off his lover in complete earnest. “Waiting until the moment I could see you again, until I could have you in my arms and in my bed again—it was almost unendurable.”

Komaeda keens, and then musters out, “F-For me it was agonizing...! So agonizing...!”

Aah, agonizing. Yes, that’s a better word. It had been painful. So, so, so painful. If not for your voice, I definitely would’ve fallen apart, Nagito. You kept me together. You saved me, time and time again. I love you, I love you, I—

Komaeda comes with a cry, cock spurting thick, warm, white ropes of cum that splattered onto his arm, hand, and across that pale, flat stomach. Hinata blinks, flushed as he swallows and then loosens his grip so that he can pull his hand away.

Komaeda pants, but he also watches intently as Hinata licks the cum off his own skin.

Bitter, Hinata thinks. Nagito needs to drink less soda and more water.

Komaeda laughs cheerfully, even as he’s still taking those deep gulping breaths.

“I forgot just how intense things get with you. Or maybe I was just really wound up in anticipation!” He snickers, high-pitched and breathy. “I might end up dying here at this rate. Wouldn’t that be the greatest pleasure at all?”

“No.” Hinata’s hand presses into the spot beside his head; Hinata’s mismatched stare bores into him. “Not at all. You shouldn’t even say that jokingly, Nagito.”

Komaeda’s smile twitches, but he relaxes.

“Yeah, I shouldn’t,” he sighs, reaching out and tenderly touching his lover’s cheek. Even this bit of contact was practically brimming with warmth. “But... Having to leave you is going to be so agonizing that I might as well be dying.”

Hinata takes his hand and squeezes in return before kissing his wrist.

“I guess that means we should make the most of our time together!” Komaeda exclaims brightly, beaming up at him. “I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to just spending our every waking moment in intimacy, Hinata-kun! Or, shouldn’t I say...” He pulls his hand away to tap him on the nose. “Ha, ji, me?”

Hinata shudders on the spot. Komaeda’s grin is smug at the fact.

“...Hajime,” he whispers sensually, pushing himself up and gazing up at him with those glowing, enchanting mossy greens under thick ivory lashes. “Hajime, let me return the favor.”

Hinata swallowed, and then, he flips them over without another word with Komaeda on top and seeming a bit taken aback from the suddenness of it.

“I don’t want you to hurt your neck,” Hinata said simply, even as he nervously averts his gaze. “So it’d be easier like this, right, Nagito?”

Komaeda blinks a few times and then he nods with a smile.

“Yes, that’s right.”

With that, he leans down, taking Hinata’s cock in hand and then into his mouth. After that, Hinata let his mind go blank as the sensations washed over him. His hips rock on instinct as Komaeda sucks, and a low groan escapes his lips.

“Fuck, Nagito...” He shivers at a clever flick of tongue, and then, without warning, Komaeda takes him in deeper—“F-Fuck, Nagito!”

It really had been too long. God, it had been way too fucking long. And, yet, Komaeda still deep-throated him like it was nothing.

“Nagito,” he slurs, reaching out to thread his fingers through Komaeda’s hair, hissing softly as Komaeda blinked innocent eyes back at him while continuing to messily suck him off. Hinata cracked a smile at the endearing sight of Komaeda drooling around him, wiping away a stream of saliva from Komaeda’s cheek with his thumb. Hinata ended up shuddering when Komaeda scraped his teeth against him in response. “Nagito, fuck...!”

“Mmm...” Komaeda pulls off him with a wet pop, licking his swelling lips. “You don’t need to say anything. Just relax, Hajime. I’ll take care of you.” He smiles brightly and pumps his cock, swiping off precum to suck it off his thumb. “I’ll take care of this, too.”

Fuck. Nagito.

He wasn’t in any position to argue.

Hinata lays back and relaxes best he can under the circumstances. Despite his effort, he can feel all too keenly where Komaeda’s touching him from his cock to his thigh being squeezed by the robotic hand. He sucks in his breath.

Komaeda takes him back into his mouth, surrounding him in warm, wet heat.

Fuck.

There’s not much else to do except enjoy it. As if there’d be any other choice, and as if he’d want to do anything else at that moment besides maybe pet Komaeda’s hair and coo over him, reiterate over and over again how much he adored him and loved him and how sexy he was how beautiful and perfect and wonderful and how much he loved him—

“H-Hah...!”

Yeah, there’s no way he could get all of that out without embarrassing himself horribly in the process. He was already tired, he just wanted to lay back and relax and let his mind go blank.

It really does feel so good. Nagito... Nagito, Nagito, Nagito...

“Nagito,” he murmured and his hips jerk. “N-Nagito...! Nagito, fuck, I might just...!”

Komaeda’s throat clamped around him. Komaeda’s clever fingers pressed into his perineum.

Hinata didn’t have a prayer as he came hard.

He blanked out for the first moment of absolute bliss he’s had in months.

When he came back to, Komaeda had already swallowed most of it, sucking remnants off his fingers.

“You’re still so quiet when you come,” he said. “Why is that?”

“I-I...” Hinata nearly bit his tongue as he shuddered, his thighs quivering a bit as he pushed himself up. “I dunno... That’s just...how I’m like, I guess. Sorry. I can call your name out if you want.”

“That would be nice, but your shaky gasping is cute, too.” Komaeda gives a cheerful smile. “Hinata-kun, you really are so cute. I love you.”

In an instant, Hinata pulls him into a deep kiss. He tastes himself on Komaeda’s tongue. It’s unsurprisingly bitter mixed with the usual sweet taste of his lover. He doesn’t mind it too much, especially with how Komaeda softly kisses him back.

“Mm...” When they part, Komaeda makes an adorable ‘pwah’ sound. “Nagito, I love you too. So, so much.”

Komaeda’s cheeks are rosy, his eyes alit as he beams. His giggle is even brighter as Hinata kisses along his jaw, down his neck, his shoulder.

“Hey... Hey, hey, hey...” Komaeda’s arms wrap around him; Komaeda hums softly into his ear. “Will that be all for now? I suppose we do have the time for more, later. Still I can’t help but feel a little disappoint—ah! Don’t bite!”

“Sorry,” Hinata muttered lowly and insincerely, kissing the teeth marks left behind on his pectoral. “Are you really good for more, Nagito?”

“I could probably go another round, maybe even two,” Komaeda said. “I’ve been taking steps to improve my stamina while you were gone, Hinata-kun! In fact, I have faith that I won’t even faint in the middle this time!”

Hinata gave him a look.

“I definitely won’t faint!” Komaeda exclaimed firmly. “After all, if I faint, I waste the precious time we have together! That would just be despairing!”

Despite his nose wrinkling, a smile tugged at the corner of Hinata’s lips. “You sure you don’t want me acting as your nurse, Nagito?”

“I’m pretty sure,” Komaeda replied, shaking his head. “As much as I enjoy spending time together, I’d feel like a burden if you had to take care of me like that again. You need to relax, Hinata-kun.”

“You’re not a burden,” he said more seriously. “So don’t say that, Nagito.”

“...you need to relax, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda repeated instead, cupping his cheek. “So I shouldn’t cause you any trouble while I’m here. That’s the opposite of what I want.”

Hinata nuzzled back into his hand, kissing his palm before tugging him into his lap. His fingers trail down Komaeda’s back, running over the ridges of his spine.

“You’re so warm, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda says and presses even closer against him. “Just like the sun.”

“My Nagito is like home,” Hinata said in return, earning a deep blush in response.

“I... It’s the same for me.” Komaeda nodded firmly. “Definitely. Geez. Hinata Hajime is dangerous. Not to be underestimated! You’ll be the death of me one of these days... I don’t want that, because I want to live with you...or something like that.”

“I want that too,” Hinata replied, eyes fond and adoring as he lays Komaeda on the bed, Komaeda’s arms still looped around his neck. “I’ll rush to make it so that we can stay together for as long as we can, Nagito.”

“Just don’t overwork yourself trying to do that, Hinata-kun,” Komaeda said. “I would be really upset with you if you did. And you don’t want to be scolded, right?”

“Mm... Guess not.”

But if it’s you, I don’t mind. If anything, I might just need it. That said, I shouldn’t trouble you too much, huh? You’ve had so much to worry about already, Nagito.

“Did you, uh, bring any condoms, Nagito?” Hinata asks, flustered. “I have lubricant, but not...that...”

“Yeah, I brought some packets,” Komaeda said with such enviable ease. And then, that cheerful smile. “But for this encounter, I wanted to go without. Is that okay?”

Hinata swallowed at that, flustering even more.

“It’s going to be messier, yes,” Komaeda went on, loosening his arms so that he could lay more comfortably beneath him, hair splayed beautifully across the pillow. “But there’s such satisfaction that can come from it, too. So just this once, at least? Please, Hajime?”

He really had Hinata wrapped around his little finger.

“...haah...”

Hinata pulls away briefly to retrieve the bottle he had stashed away in the bedside drawer for convenience. There was just enough in it, thankfully, though he would probably end up using the rest of the bottle for this. Which was fine. He had other bottles.

He slicks up his fingers first, for prosperity’s sake. Komaeda sucks in his breath as he presses those fingers to his entrance.

“You don’t have to prepare me,” he mumbles, almost sheepishly. “As I said, I prepared myself plenty, H... Hajime...”

“Yeah, but I want to feel that out for myself,” Hinata said and pushed in the first finger. Komaeda groans. “Oh, but you were right. You’re pretty prepared. You got here before I did. Were you fingering yourself, then...?”

“M... Maybe a little...” Komaeda squirms as his finger curls. “Aha...! It was in anticipation...! Impatient as I am, even I know my own meager touch could never compare to yours...”

It’s been so long since I’ve gotten to enjoy this heat...

Hinata adds another finger, thrusting them in more earnestly and earning a sharp gasp.

“Yeah... I feel the same way. Masturbating is just a means to an end for me. A way to relieve stress. But...” His eyes rake down Komaeda’s panting figure. That preciously flushed face, those morning dew eyes, that slender physique, those plush, quivering thighs, those greedy insides swallowing up his fingers—“Nagito’s body...is so much more than that.”

My Nagito is like home.

With that, he pulled his fingers out, already impatient.

He’s already prepared himself. And if I push it, he’s not going to last very long once my cock’s actually inside. With that in mind—

With that in mind, he positioned himself, taking in a deep breath as he was close.

“...Nagito...” He pushes inside, and their whole connected bodies shudder as he sinks into mind-numbing, constricting heat. “Oh, Nagito...”

“H-Hajime...!” Komaeda’s own fingers dig into his back. He might actually have marks after all this. And that, too, is a really satisfying thought, especially as Komaeda pants. “Hajime... Hajime...”

Komaeda is already drooling, eyes glimmering and swirling from the sensations. Hinata kissed him briefly and deeply.

My Nagito is like home. If it wasn’t for you...

“Hajime... Hajime... Please... Please start moving...”

“Okay... If you’re sure...”

If it wasn’t for you...

Hinata groans as he begins to rock his hips. Slowly, carefully, he had to be gentle. The heat and Komaeda’s legs squeezing around his waist made it hard to think, but, the more he looked down at Komaeda’s needy face, the surer he was that he had to be careful for this person’s sake above all else.

If it wasn’t for you, I would’ve lost myself a long-ass time ago. Aggravating, infuriating, troubling... You, who pushed me harder than anyone else... And yet had the most calming smile all the while.

“I love you,” he murmured as he angled his thrusts to get Komaeda crying out as he writhed. Despite that, Hinata kept his voice low and firm. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Even though you caused so much trouble, caused me a lot of grief, I’ll never not appreciate the time you waited for me to wake up.

“H-Hajime...” Komaeda practically sobs from pleasure, shakily cupping his cheek. “Hajime, Hajime, I... I love you too...”

Komaeda’s palm skids along his jaw, and his fingers brush against surgical scars. Even in this moment, there was an indescribable sensation from that, from how carefully Komaeda’s fingertips traced those scars. Almost desperately, Hinata takes his hand, entwines their fingers, and squeezes as he kisses his wrist.

Just from that, he can feel how Komaeda’s pulse jumps, how Komaeda squeezes tighter around him.

“You’re so cute,” he sighs adoringly, kissing his cheek as their skin smacks together, and Komaeda keens. Hinata kisses his neck, humming as he nuzzles him, never pausing in his thrusts as he peppers kisses along his skin. “Nagito, Nagito, Nagito...”

Komaeda groaned, shuddering and then—“Hajime, I-I need...! I...! I...!”

Good... So good.

Especially like this. Needy, desperate, writhing and wanton, mewling as his nails dig into Hinata’s shoulders, and pulling him in closer and closer, his hard cock between their stomachs. Komaeda was close, without a doubt. It would just take one good thrust against his prostate.

“My Nagito,” he murmurs. “You want to come, right? I want to. I want to fill you up, because it’s only fair when you’ve completely filled my thoughts.”

“I... I-It’s not,” Komaeda gasps. “Hajime... Hajime fills my thoughts, too, so if you fill my body, too, our relationship will be...c-completely unbalanced...”

“Aah, really?” Hinata chuckles at that, and then his voice lowered. “Should I pull out, then?”

“Don’t you fucking dare!” It’s practically a screech. Komaeda’s lower lip is quivering, those tear-torn eyes glittering with frustration and delirium. “If... If you do that, I’ll never forgive you, Hajime.”

“No?” Hinata rolls his hips, grunting with amusement and arousal. “Very well, I’ll just come inside of you, then. Isn’t that what you want, darling?”

Komaeda shudders, arching, gasping out, and—“Hajime... Hajime...!”

“Come for me, Nagito,” he murmured into Komaeda’s sensitive ear. “You really are so beautiful at the peak of pleasure. Just the thought...!”

Fuck, I’m close, too. So close. So fucking close, but I want... I want...

“Hajime... Hajime...”

Komaeda’s arms wrap around him tightly. He sniffles, blinking those tearful eyes up at him.

“Hajime... P-Please...!”

Fuck.

Hinata holds onto him tightly and quickly as he comes. Just as before, he barely makes a sound, just tightening his grip on his lover’s body as said body milked his cock. He feels all too keenly his lover’s responding orgasm, rippling through his lithe form, cum splattering between their stomachs as Komaeda sobs out his name. It’s a perfect, perfect moment.

Hinata buries his face into the other’s neck and just breathes.

Nagito.

“Hajime...” Komaeda inhales sharply and Hinata rolls off him so that he can breathe more easily. Komaeda ends up wheezing as he laughs. “That was...intense...just as expected...!”

Komaeda reaches out and entwines their fingers.

“I’m excited for more, ehe...”

Hinata kissed his forehead and then tugged him forward, scooping him up into his arms.

“C’mon. Let’s get you cleaned off, Nagito.”

“Yay!”

--

Komaeda hums as Hinata rinses him off with the spray, fiddling with his toes and purring as Hinata scrubbed his back. And then giggling as Hinata lathers his hair.

“You’re going to end up getting soap in your mouth, Nagito.”

“Ehehe!” And then Komaeda nearly gagged on soap.

Hinata rolls his eyes fondly and rinses him off once more. He takes this time to admire his lover’s slender neck—thinks so himself about how he should leave a constellation of love marks on the delicate juncture between neck and shoulder and perhaps all along his chest as well. Notably around those pretty pink nipples of his.

So many marks that even after Komaeda leaves, his body will be tingling.

It’s a satisfying though, albeit one tinged with bittersweet melancholy at the thought of Komaeda leaving. When they haven’t seen each other in so long already.

...no time is enough time.

“Ah, Hajime?”

Komaeda perks up as Hinata sets the spray aside to wrap his arms around Komaeda’s shoulders, embrace pulling him close and holding on tight.

“...Hinata-kun?” Komaeda switches to his family name and that only has his grip tighten. “Did you have a flash, or...?”

“No... No, nothing like that.” Hinata shook his head, kissing Komaeda’s nape softly with a sad smile. “I’m just...really glad that you’re here. That I can hold you again just like this. You have no idea just how lonely it’s been without you, Nagito.”

“Well...” Komaeda snorts, patting his arm with his mechanic hand. “I can at least imagine, I think.”

“Ah, yeah... You were lonely too, weren’t you?” The thought hurt somehow more than the thought that Komaeda would have to leave him again. “I... Sorry. I’m sorry, Nagito.”

“For what?” Komaeda asked cheerfully. “You’re not doing anything wrong, so I’m a little confused.”

“...because...” Hinata sighed. “When we first got together, I promised you that you wouldn’t be alone anymore, right? But, now...”

“I’m not alone as long as Hajime loves me.” Komaeda shifts so that he can kiss Hinata’s cheek. “So don’t worry. I get lonely without you, yes, but I’m not alone. That’s different. If I died, you would mourn me and carry me in your heart, right?”

“O-Of course! Still! Don’t say stuff like that! I don’t—!”

“I don’t want me to die either, because I also want to stay with you, Hinata-kun. As I’ve said before.”

Hinata flinched, blinking at him helplessly.

“...Nagito...”

Komaeda blinks back at him so innocuously that Hinata relaxes in spite of himself, even as the pangs in his chest continue on as a dull ache. Komaeda strokes his cheek, alleviating them a little more, and Komaeda kisses him.

It’s a chaste, comfort kiss. Warm and soft. Tender and loving.

Hinata deepens it into something more in his desperation. Komaeda allows it, sighing as Hinata’s tongue rubs up against his own, as Hinata’s hands run down his back and squeeze his rump.

“...I’m not alone as long as you love me, but...” Komaeda trails off, flushing. “I still don’t like being separated from you. So can we be one again, Hajime?”

Hinata swallowed.

“...yeah. Just one more round, though, okay? Let’s not overdo it on the first night.”

Komaeda chuckles warmly. His thigh rubbed up against Hinata’s hip.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

--

Komaeda is sufficiently exhausted once Hinata lays him down in bed. Not so exhausted, however, that he doesn’t immediately cuddle up to him once he’s slipped under the covers as well.

Hinata smiles warmly, drawing Komaeda in close. He sighs as Komaeda’s arms wrap around his midsection and as Komaeda makes himself comfortable. Their bodies still fit together after all this time. Komaeda is practically atop him, cheek pressed against his chest and heartbeat.

Komaeda is light and warm.

Everything feels as it should be.

Komaeda yawns inelegantly, and Hinata strokes his hair, lulling him to sleep.

“...welcome home, Nagito.”

“I’m hooome,” Komaeda drones drowsily, slurring. Hinata chuckles, ruffling his hair with the utmost fondness.

“I love you. So much.”

“Love...you...too... Haji...moo...”

Just like that, Komaeda was out like a light, dozing and drooling. It’s definitely a little gross, but he allows it because it’s him. And, honestly, he’s too cute to stir.

Too cute. Too precious. And people still think you’re too dangerous. They’re wrong about you.

“I promise, Nagito,” he whispered. “After I’m done with all this... We’re going to be together forever. But for now...”

For now...

Hinata himself yawns.

I should get sleep. I want—to wake up early in the morning and make Nagito breakfast. Something other than toast. More than toast. For sure.

With that, he sleeps, holding his lover close.

[huntertales]

Part Three: When You're Older, You'll Understand. (Episode Mashup 6.13/6.14)

Episode Summary: When the reader falls sick with the flu, Bobby offers to look after her until she recovers, leaving the Winchester brothers to work a case together without her in five years. While she recuperates, the reader spends some quality time with Bobby as the boys find themselves having to face a problem from their past. Sam starts to remember his time being soulless during a case and a familiar face unexpectedly comes back in Dean’s life. Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader  Word Count: 5,719.

Previous Part | Supernatural Rewrite Masterlist

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

The question was meant for the younger Winchester, but for the first time in the past three days, you could answer that you were on the track of getting there. You were sitting up right on the couch with your legs crossed and laptop propped open. In one hand you had a still steaming hot cup of tea to soothe your still aching sore throat and a cell phone in the other. Your fever had reduced late last night when you woke up for the first time after sleeping for seven solid straight hours. One of the good things about being sick was that you were getting more rest than you had since you started hunting. Downside, the past seventy-two hours were a blur. It came with the high fever you had been battling and the cough medicine you had been taking.

The older Winchester updated you on how things were proceeding while you were gone. He had good news, and bad news. You decided to be lead with the good news first. The good news was that the case the boys had taken by an anonymous tip was solved. And they found out who lead them there. That’s when the bad news came in. The entire set up was a trap for Sam. It seemed that you and him had worked a case back in the day while he was soulless and you were still hunting without Dean. But that wasn’t the worst of it. While Sam insisted on working the case to fix what he didn’t while soulless, he got a taste of the past that you had tried to prevent.

Sam’s good deed lead him with terrible consequences. He took a trip down memory lane filled with flashbacks of his time when he was soulless. The more he worked on the case, the more he started to remember. What was the most worrisome part of it all was right before they were about to leave, Sam blacked out for a few minutes before coming back around. In the true Winchester fashion, Sam said that he felt perfectly fine. All though he admitted much as to being exhausted—the equivalent of being hit by a planet. But he thought he was healthy enough to go on hunting like nothing was wrong. You and Dean were a bit more skeptical.

“I said, I’m fine.” Sam lied for the third time since being asked the question about his well being. You rolled your eyes in annoyance from how stubborn he could be. You brought the cup to your lips and take a drink. Not liking he attention on himself, Sam decided to change the conversation back to you. “What about you? I called you last night. But you sounded pretty out of it.”

“You did? Oh, you did.” You mumbled underneath your breath. You moved the phone away from your ear to check the list of recents calls you had gotten. And there was Sam’s name. He called you last night around seven. “Huh. And yeah, I guess I was. Fever and cough medicine sure as hell make a weird combo.”

"So, I'm guessing you don't remember the conversation we had last night?" Sam asked.  

You furrowed your brow from his question. You honestly didn’t remember the conversation you supposedly had with Sam last night. Everything was a blur. The hunt that you took with him while he was still soulless was a bit of a better one in your memory. It was a few months into hunting with the Campbells and Dean was a distant memory you were trying to hide from yourself. You and Sam were finally comfortable in the messy, unhealthy friends with benefits set up you made. The younger Winchester still got plenty around with the ladies. But when you wanted a little fun with him, no matter the time or the place, he was at your beck and call.

You could feel your cheeks beginning to burn as your stomach suddenly felt nauseated. Maybe it was because of the mucus dripping somewhere other than your nose. Maybe it was due to the terrifying thought that you let something slip when you were out of your mind. You knew you became an open book when you got a little too drunk. Having a fever and the strong medicine that you were taking made you feel like the entire time you were awake was like one long trip you didn’t know was a dream or reality. You decided to proceed with caution.

“No, I don’t.” You admitted. “Did I say anything stupid?”

"I don't know. Most of the things that came out of your mouth were mostly gibberish. I only called to see of you could help.” Sam said. You found yourself letting out a sigh of relief from what you heard. All though it posed the question if he was really telling the truth, or if he was being polite. If you had blurted out the truth, Sam didn't seem to let the silence linger into awkward territories. "How are you feeling today? You sound better."

"Wish I could say that I was. My fever is down, thank God. It's been driving me insane. I mean, the dreams I’ve been having over the past few days…” You said. You trailed off for a moment to take another sip of your drink, the warmth soothing your sore throat. Your dreams were filled all sorts of things that almost felt real. Of things that you shuddered at the thought of when your mind replayed them again. Dean asked them what it was about. “It’s nothing serious. They’ll pass. I just don't think I'll be running any marathons for the rest of the week. Since you two barely survived without me, how do you feel about taking another job?"

"Depends." Dean said. "What do you got for us?"

"Your favorite." You said. You moved the cursor over to the article that caught your attention a few minutes right before the boys called you. "Janitor murdered in a college lab last night. Doors were locked. Nobody else got in or out of the building."

“Great.” Sam said, seeming on board with the idea of staying busy. “Where to?”

“Paterson, New Jersey. I’ll send you the link so you can take a look for yourself.” You said. You were about to do just that, but you found yourself starting to chuckle when you began to realize where they were going. “Oh, hey. Maybe you two will get a Snooki sighting.”

You quietly chuckled to yourself about the pop culture phenomenon that had been surrounding the state lately and the group of people who made it famous. Dean got a kick out of it himself when you heard him scoff while they were still on speaker with you. Sam, however, being gone for over a year and a half, still had a lot of catching up to do. "What's a Snooki?"

"That is a good question." You mumbled underneath your breath.

+ + +

The drive from Rhode Island to New Jersey took no time at all. You sent the link to the article to Sam a few minutes after you ended the call. While you continued your hibernation on Bobby's couch in the library, the boys settled themselves into a motel and checked out the crime scene at the college. A simple sweep of the room with the EMF reader blamed a spirit to be at fault for this murder. But that wasn’t the weirdest part of it all. Dean had gotten a phone call from a name he hadn’t seen in what felt like months—Lisa Braden.

The woman he least heard from after he was cursed with a truth spell and she was forced to tell him everything about how she truly felt about him. She wanted her distance from him, and that’s what he gave her. Why she was calling after all this time sent warning flags off in his head as he started to think of the worst possible scenario. Dean had been cautious during their relationship, and the real villain was dead. It was left Dean wondering why—after all this time—she wanted to talk to him.

The woman who told the truth about how hard she tried to understand who he was. How much she tried to do everything to get him to balance both worlds. She was right about stepping away.  Dean thought it was best to ignore her calls. Whatever sort of loneliness she might be having would pass. She would find someone better than him. The both of them would pretend like what happened a year or so go didn’t happen. Sometimes it was better to forget the past then open it up like a wound that healed into a scar. But in order for the past to turn into a scar, you needed to face it head on and resolve the issue.

Dean didn't know how Lisa's life was going without him, he wanted to think that it was flourishing without him in it to screw it up. Lisa was a strong, smart woman. But she couldn't fit into the lifestyle that he lead with. Dean didn't let practically anyone in. And much as he had thought his relationship with you was unhealthy, he would agree...and disagree. He wouldn't admit it to her straight in the face, but he was happier than he had been in a long time. He was happy with Lisa, too. Being with Lisa was like living through a movie. It was fun and exciting, he got to do things that he never could before. But, in the back of his mind, he knew it would eventually end.

And while it did end on a sour note, Dean was content with how things turned out after being hit with that truth spell. It turned out to be a cursing...and a blessing. He finally got the truth out of you about how you really felt about him, and he found out what was wrong with his brother. Things were ever so slightly looking up for him. His life wasn't perfect. His brother was being a stubborn pain in the ass, he had unfinished business that needed solving. He thought his love life from a past relationship wouldn't be one of them. Much as Dean tried to ignore Lisa, after her third attempt at calling him, he bit the bullet and answered the phone.

The voice he heard on the other end when he answered wasn't Lisa's like he suspected. It wasn't even female. Who had been calling him for the past few days was her son, Ben. Dean was a bit taken back at why the kid would be calling him, especially with what he did to the poor kid the last time that he saw him. Ben was persistent on getting Dean back home. Because it seemed his mother had been in a state of depression. She wouldn’t leave her room half the time, she wouldn’t talk to her son about anything. Lisa wasn’t herself lately. Ben thought that Dean could come in and save the day. And much as the older Winchester tried to say no, Sam pushed him to settle his past. They would have to face it eventually.

So, that’s what Dean was doing. He left his little brother to solve the case and headed to Michigan to face a past that he thought would be buried forever, or, at least, for a little bit longer. He spent all day and night driving to the Braden household to see if he could try and knock some sense into the woman. What he didn't understand that why, all of a sudden, she was feeling depressed. Was she missing him? He highly doubted that. She dodged a bullet with him. She was too good for him. Not that she was better than you.

The both of you were perfect in his eyes—smart, beautiful, stubborn and had qualities that he chesheried. You and Lisa were almost the same type of person, but, yet, you were complete polar opposites of one another. And the only real thing that was different from Lisa’s relationship to his with you, he loved you. In Lisa's words, your relationship was messed up, unhealthy, and you were going to do nothing but make him miserable. If that was the case, so be it.

He sustained a lot of rainy and miserable days. At some points it felt like the rain was never going to end, he was going to drown in the sorrows that flooded his mind. But there were times when the raining would stop, sometimes the clouds moved, shining some light. Even if it was only a little bit. And there were days when the rain cleared up and he was blessed with the sun. You were that sun, and when it shined, you made all those rainy days seem like they would never come back. Lisa was like an umbrella. She protected him and sheltered him when the storms were the roughest they had ever been. Lisa did all that she could for him, but when the sun came, she knew it was time to be put away.

Dean knew it was his time to return the favor to Lisa in her time of need. He swallowed down all of his fears and pushed the doorbell several times to the home that he once thought was going to be his forever. He stopped after the fifth time and waited for someone to answer the door. It was a minute until he saw the front door handle twist, revealing a face that wasn’t Ben. It was Lisa, she answered the door with a bright smile on her face and dressed for a night on the town. When she realized who it really was, her smile faded, changing into a look of almost disbelief at who had the audacity to be standing on her front porch after all this time.

“Dean,” She spoke his name like it was poisonous venom. “What are you doing here?”

"Well, you look absolutely fine." Dean said. Lisa furrowed her brow from what he said and began wondering what exactly his motive was for being here. He let out a sigh when he realized what was going on here. Ben sure was a sneaky kid. "We've been Parent Trap'd. Ben sent out a 911.”

“Why would he do that?” Lisa asked.

Dean examined Lisa's black dress and earrings that looked expensive, to how her hair was perfectly styled in an updo that she wasn't spending a night in to watch TV. She was in the middle of getting ready when he interrupted her. "You're going on a date, huh?"

Lisa thought about the question for a moment before it was her turn to sigh, in annoyance from what her son did. She opened up the door wider and invited her unwelcome guest on in. Dean followed his familiar way down the path to the kitchen, gladly taking a cold beer from Lisa before she grabbed a green cardigan to cover up. He took a seat on one of the stools he once sat at with Ben while Lisa cooked them breakfast. It felt like a lifetime ago.

Lisa began to slowly pace around the living room, the same way she did when Ben was nearly on the edge of failing science. It was things that you dealt with as a parent. Now she was nervously pacing because it was her past knocking. And neither one of them wanted to answer it.

“So, who’s the guy?” Dean decided to satisfy his curiosity and attempt to break the silence. Lisa  turned around to face him, wondering if he was going to be a dick about it. She repeated his question with an almost sarcastic tone of voice. Dean raised his brow, wanting to show her that he wanted things to go civil. She decided to answer his question.

“His name’s Matt.” Lisa answered his question. “He’s a doctor.”

"Oh, Dr. Matt." Dean mumbled. He tried not to let his feeling show as he nodded his head slowly before looking down at his beer. His remark wasn't meant to be malicious. But, for some reason, it came off that way. "How respectable."

"How long was it until you and Y/N got back together?" Lisa questioned the man. She wanted it to be a rhetorical question that was said to spite him, but from the look on his face, she knew instantly that the both of you were an item again. She shook her head and rolled her eyes.  "I don't wanna do this with you, Dean. I don't want things to be like this. But it is. I called you six times, Dean."

“And I almost called you back about a hundred.” Dean admitted. Lisa’s lips stretched into a tight smile from hearing his confession. She turned around her spot, her back now to him. “Lis, Ben called me. I dropped everything and ran. If you want to know if I still care—”

“Doesn’t help me.” Lisa said, quickly turning around to face him again.

"You ended things with me. And for good reason. Give me the cold shoulder, tell me I’m a dick. I don’t care. Just don't walk on eggshells around me." Dean said. He knew how she got when she wanted to get something off her chest. All though she let everything out on the phone, there had to be something else from how she was acting. “What do you want from me?”

“I’m not asking for anything.“ Lisa said with a matter-of-fact voice.

“Well, then ask for something,” Dean demanded. “‘cause you’re sure acting like it!”

A tense silence fell between the both of them from how Dean raised his voice. The both of them turned their gaze away from one another when they heard footsteps quietly approaching down the hall. Ben, the culprit who lied just to get them in the same room, wasn't going to stick around for very long. He stopped in his tracks when his mother and Dean caught him.

“Go to your room!”

Ben stopped dead in his tracks when he felt two pairs of eyes on him. His mother gave him a warning look as Dean acted like it was another day, but when he realized he was just a guest, the man gave the kid a smile. Ben didn't say a word. He listened to the command and headed up to his bedroom. Lisa let out a sigh from what her son was trying to do. It was all for the right reasons, but he was still too young to understand there was more to this situation than what she told him.

It had always been just the two of them since he was born. Until that fateful day when Dean knocked on their front door and changed their lives forever. Ben got a taste of having a father figure in his life, Lisa had someone in her life that felt right. The Braden family thought things were perfect, that this feeling would last forever. But nothing good ever does.

Lisa took the empty stool next to Dean's, deciding to finally answer his question with a bit of truth she didn't realize until it was too late. "You know, I can't ask you for something. I know what I want…I wanted it before you knocked on my door. Ever since Y/N left a letter in my mailbox asking me to look out for you, back when all that crazy stuff was happening, I tried not to think much about it. I thought if things were meant to be, it would. When you showed up...I thought it was a sign. I gave it my all. For her. For Ben. And for that year we all were together, I don’t know about you, but it was the happiest time in my life.”

Dean thought that Lisa had admitted all of her buried truth back when he had the cursed spell, but it seemed she was harboring it longer. Time doesn't always heal wounds. Sometimes they make it worse. "When Y/N showed up after all that time, I was upset. I said all those things to you because I was angry. And, I'll be honest, I was jealous. Because she has something I can't, not how you live. My phone rings, someone knocks on my door, tiny chance it's you. I think you want to try again. But I know hell would freeze over before that happens. Big chance, it's Sam or Y/N, calling to tell me you're dead.”

Dean wasn't good with relationships. He never had been. He was more the kind of guy who loved 'em at night and left them in the morning, never to be heard from again. Lisa was one of them who had showed him a weekend he never forgot. It took him to have his head on the chopping block from a demon deal to fetch her name and see if the spark was still there. It also was the same reason why he let his personal feelings for you come up to the surface. Dean had a special connection to you and Lisa. He softly spoke the name of the woman who he had up and left after she gave him everything, Lisa shook her head.

“Don’t apologize, or anything. I know, Dean. I know you love her, she loves you. And I’m sorry for what I said. It was just how I felt at the time. And I’m trying to get better. And I have been. I get to this place where I’m okay...and then you show up at our door. You keep doing that. Every time I think I’m never gonna see you again.” Lisa said. She waited for him to get up and leave, but he sat there, almost like a deer in headlights. “I’m trying to get over you. What are you trying to do? What do you want from us, Dean? Because whatever it is, me and Ben can’t give it.”

Dean, yet again, didn't know what to say. He didn't want to apologize for his feelings for you, but he couldn't say the time that he had with Lisa was a waste. Lisa pushed herself up to her feet and circled around to the kitchen. She opened up a drawer and pulled out an envelope. She outstretched her arm, signaling for Dean to take it. All she said was that she needed this out of her house before she made her way upstairs to finish getting ready. Dean stared at the name written on the front of the envelope, and who’s handwriting it belonged to. He was tempted to read it, but not here. Dean decided to speak to someone else before he left.

Ben was upstairs in his room like Dean suspected, sitting on the edge of his bed playing his video games that consumed most of his life. It was nice to know that some things didn't change. Dean made his way into the room, acting casual for this conversation to go smoothly. He peeked over slightly to see what game Ben was playing.

“Well, that’s ridiculous,” Dean said, trying to start a conversation with him. “Plants could never kill a zombie.”

“You think I’m gonna say I’m sorry?” Ben asked.

“Why would I think that, because you lied to get me here?” Dean wondered. Ben still thought his idea of an emergency was correct. The older Winchester knew the kid was sorely mistaken. “A date’s not an emergency, Ben.”

“It is if it’s the third one.” Ben said. He was just a kid, but he was at the age where he thought he knew everything. “I watch TV, I know what that means.”

Dean let out a sigh from what the poor kid was going through. He really didn't understand what was going on, all he wanted was for things to be the way they were. Dean walked over and sat at the edge of the bed next to him. "Well, your mom's a grownup...she gets to go out."

“Why won’t you come home? Can’t you just say ‘I’m sorry’ and then come back?” Ben asked. He thought that two words were going to fix a situation that was already bad enough as it was. Dean apologized for what he couldn’t do. “Can’t or won’t?”

“Both.” Dean answered.

“So you hate Mom now?” Ben questioned the man, trying to figure out the true motive. Dean looked at the kid with surprise at what he was trying to get at. “So it’s me? Whatever I did, I’m sorry.”

“Listen to me. You didn’t do anything. You understand that?” Dean said. He spoke in a firm tone, wanting to convey the message that everything which was unfolding wasn’t the kid’s fault. He was still a kid. Nothing on TV to explain what was going on. “Look, one day you’ll get this, when you’re older.”

“Don’t talk to me like I’m six.” Bean said.

“Okay, fine. It’s like this then. Just because you love someone, doesn’t mean you should stick around and screw up their life.” Dean said. If the poor kid wanted the truth, so be it. Dean would rather leave here with Lisa and Ben hating his guts than wishing for something that was never going to happen again. “So I can’t be here.”

“You think something will follow you home?” Ben asked, wondering if it was all about their wellbeing. Dean felt his jaw tighten at what the real reason was.

“No. No, I don’t. But I think my job turns me into somebody that can’t sit at your dinner table.” Dean said. “And if I stayed, you’d end up just like me.”

Ben shook his head, “Why do you say it like you’re so bad?”

“Trust me. I’m not someone you wanna aim to be.” Dean said. Ben tried to put his opinion in on the matter, but it wouldn’t change the way things had to be. “I’m sorry, Ben. You see, this was you got a shot at living whatever life you want. You know, pick one. Pick five. Because with me, there’s just the one road.”

“You’re a liar, Dean.” Ben suddenly said. Dean furrowed his brow when the kid became hostile towards him. “You say family’s so important. But what do you call people who care for you, who love you even when you’re a dick?”

“You got me. Family is important. But mine gets hurt all the time. If I stick around, I don’t know what will happen.” Dean said. He tried his hardest to try and explain. “And my family’s a little different from yours. They’re all sorts of messed up.”

“Then why are you leaving? Why are you going back to them if they’re so messed up?” Ben was throwing question after question at Dean before he could answer them. He had every right to be upset, but the kid hit a place where he knew nothing about. “I heard Mom when she was on the phone with you. It's that Y/N woman, isn't it? She said that you two love each other. But if she loves you so much, why does she make your life so miserable? Why couldn’t you just let her stay dead?  Hell, it would be better for everyone if she dropped dead now. For good.”

"Hey! Don't you ever speak about someone like that." Dean found himself snapping at Ben. It was mostly because for how he was talking about you, but he reminded himself that Ben was still a kid. "It's disrespectful."

"Why? It’s the truth. I read 'Pet Sematary.' When Louis brought Church and Gage back from the dead, they weren't the same. They were freaks." Ben said, almost hissing out the last word he said. Dean blinked, wondering how a kid like him could suddenly be so...angry. "Sometimes dead is better. And if Y/N was dead, maybe you could stay.”

"Maybe you're right. If Y/N was still gone...I'd be here. But she's alive. So is my brother. And they need me. Just as much as your mom needs you. Because she loves you. She wants to protect you, she wants you to find someone special. And trust me when I say this," Dean let out a sigh. "When you're older, you’ll understand. You’ll find someone special...and before you know it, you’re head over heels. You’ll do anything for them, and you’ll do just about everything to make sure they're safe. And you keep going back to them because they make you happy."

“We didn’t make you happy?” Ben asked.

“You do. But, I can’t make you happy. Not the way you and your mom deserve.” Dean admitted the awful truth nobody his age should hear. He felt like he was doing more harm than good.  “The two of you deserve a life that I can’t give you. I’m sorry.”

+ + +

Dear Lisa,

You might not know me, but I know you. We have a friend in common, his name is Dean Winchester. (And I realize as I write this out about how creepy this sounds. Let me explain myself.) My name is Y/N Y/L/N, I’m his girlfriend. Or…by the time you’re reading this, his ex. I know it’s weird. Why would I be leaving you a letter and telling you this information? Because you and I have something else in common. I think you know Dean is a special man. He doesn’t let many people in, especially not women. Both  of us have made an impact on his life for the better. I’ll be honest, when I first heard about you, I was a bit jealous from the way that he spoke about you. But after getting to know you, I realized what was so great about you. You have something that I could never give him. And that’s a happy life.

When he first met Ben, he was instantly taken back to see how much he could he see himself in  your son. You have a great kid, Lisa. He’s sweet, smart and a lot like Dean. And if I have learned anything in life, it’s that family isn’t about blood. It can be with anyone if you let them into your life. I hope you will do that if Dean knocks on your door.

I wish I could tell you more about myself. But I don’t have much time. I’ve known Dean since I was literally born. (And yes, I’m using the terminology right. He’s been at my side since I was a baby. Him and I have been through thick and thin. All though, I know my time’s up. Hopefully it will be your turn to share the rest of your life with him in blissful happiness with Ben. Maybe even have a child together. I don’t know. Just treat him right.

In the next upcoming days the news will be filled with disastrous things that will scare you, but don’t worry. You and your son are going to be okay. Including Dean. I have a few friends that I am going to make some arrangements with so that, worst case scenario, all of you will be happy. And most importantly, safe. I wish I could have met you again in different circumstances, but this will have to do. I wish you the best for you and your son.

Your friend, Y/N Y/L/N.

P.S. Please take good care of Dean.

It was the letter that started all of this. It was the reason why Lisa opened up her front door to him, why you had ran away all that time ago. Because you thought you were doing what was right. And it might have been at the time. Dean was a broken man after he witness you and his brother vanish from his sight. He didn’t know where to turn. You had lead him down a path that you thought was going to end with happily ever after. But then you came back and changed everything. For better, for worse. The truth was a bitter pill to swallow. This was for the best.

Dean was on his way back to New Jersey when he decided to pull his phone out of his jacket pocket. He dialed a number and waited it to ring a few times before they picked up. His lips stretched into a faint smile when he heard your raspy, groggy voice. "Hello?"

“Hey, sweetheart.” Dean greeted you. He looked down at the time to see that it was getting late. It was probably well into the night when he decided to call. “Did I wake you?”

“It’s fine. I was just dozing. I’ve had enough sleep to last me a lifetime. Frankly, it’s boring.” You said. You moved the phone away for a moment so you could get comfortable. When you put the phone back to your ear, you were still silent for a few seconds longer. He felt his heart skip a beat when he heard your voice come out in a soft, sweet tone that he loved. "I miss you, Dean."

“I miss you, too.” Dean said. He forgot for a moment about the conversation with Lisa, and what Ben said about you. All he wanted to do was focus on the sound of your voice. He suddenly ached to be right next to you. "Sam's a lousy hunter. I need my Nancy Drew back. Now, tell me, how’s crashing at Bobby’s been?”

"Kind of fun, actually. Did you know he has a thing for Tori Spelling? It's so…”

Dean didn't say a single world during the conversation with you. He put the phone on speaker and placed it up on the dashboard. The entire way to the New Jersey state line he listened to you ramble on about your time with Bobby, to all the TV you had been watching over the past week. His entire day had been thunderstorms and constant rain, but just like that, from the sound of your voice, he could see the sun peeking through.

[Next Part]

Rewrite Taglist:

@deansquirreljerkwinchester @lotsofspnshitposts @everything-i-tried-was-taken @starswirlblitz @albot-e @supernaturalismydrug @we-are-band-sexuals @angiewinchestercas @kaylinfayezink @owhatshername1@kgbrenner @kartuziprincessofhorrors @cleo-is-my-doggy @eeyore1988@dakota-dream  @lilylovelyxo@timetravelingginger @flaurityxoxokokooxox @holahellohialoha  @quicksilver123456  @natashacamillaus @nadanidea @falloutofmymemez @lexi-anastasia @kaylinfayezink @deanwnchstr @albot-eh @yelloweyedwriter @rashinyx2002 @e-quanimity @shellybeans @icantfindacreativeurl @becs-bunker @oreosatmidnight @bands-and-shietz  @fabulousmustachesonapolarbear @clarewinchester

Message me if you would like to be added!

[ezrisdax-archive]

a new standard

It takes a while for Michael to get used to Tilly. That's not necessarily a bad thing. (also here on ao3)

~~

Tilly- Syliva, or Syl if that’s what you want to call me as Tilly had insisted Michael call her – waved at her when she arrived in the mess hall.

 “Michael!” Tilly voice was far too loud and bright given the hour of the day and some of the other officers shot her confused or dirty looks but she didn’t seem to notice. “Over here.”

 Michael sighed to herself, getting her food and making her way to the table where Tilly sat. She supposed it was better than sitting alone, at least Tilly no longer viewed her as ‘the mutineer’. Now she seemed to be actively trying to include Michael to make up for her previous behaviour.

 “Did you sleep okay? I mean I slept okay, but then I know I might have been snoring and that might have been annoying and-”

 “Tilly.” Michael cut off another rambling bout. “I slept fine.”

 “Oh.” Tilly broke out in to another smile. “That’s good then. Do you know what you’re working on today, you’re coming back to the science lab right?”

 “That’s what I’ve been ordered to.” Michael agreed, taking a sip from her tea.

 “Do you like it there?” It seemed like no matter how short Michael’s answers were Tilly was determined to bring her in to the conversation.

 “I enjoy looking at scientific advancement.” Michael admitted. “I’m curious to know what’s out there.”

 “I thought that you were raised by Vulcans?” Tilly tilted her head and scrunched up her nose a little, it was almost cute. Michael hid a small smile by taking another sip of her tea at that. “I mean I know Vulcans love science but aren’t you not supposed to enjoy stuff? Oh no.” Tilly flushed suddenly, “That was insensitive, oh this is why I’m never going to be a first contact mission.” Tilly bemoaned, dropping her head.

 “It’s fine.” Michael assured her though secretly she thought Tilly might be right and not suited for a first contact mission. Her throat felt tight as she continued. “Captain Georgiou encouraged me to embrace some human aspects of exploration.” She didn’t mention that she was only really expressing it now in the wake of Philippa’s death.

 “You really admired her.” Tilly said quietly, fiddling idly with her fork. “I’m sorry.”

 Michael swallowed hard, “Thank you.” She replied quietly in kind. Tilly squirmed in the ensuing silence but didn’t say anything else, leaving Michael to her thoughts.

 ~~

 “You’re still here.” Tilly said somewhere behind Michael, sliding up beside her.

 “Since you’ve found me here, then logically yes I am.” Michael responded, not moving her gaze away from her screen.

 “C’mon.” Tilly yawned widely and Michael glanced at her from the corner of her eye. Her hair was back down in it’s many curls instead of up in a bun like usual and she was dressed in her pajamas.

 “Did you walk through the hallway like that?” Michael asked furrowing her brow and turning to face Tilly.

 Tilly glanced down and then her eyes widened. “Oh no. Oh no I did. Do you think anyone saw me?” She was beat red though the blue light cast by the screen turned her more purple. “I just woke up and you weren’t there and I got worried.” She glanced back at the door, biting her lip in worry and Michael could tell she was thinking if she ran into anyone while in the corridors.

 Michael shut down her screen and reached out to touch Tilly’s arm to get her attention. “Come on, I know a way back that shouldn’t have anybody around.” She’d learned it because she could tell she was making people uncomfortable and even the glares got tiring after a while.

 Tilly grabbed at her wrist as Michael led the way and babbled on about how she was glad that Michael knew where she was going and her vision at night was so poor. Michael mostly tuned it out, leading them back to their shared room.

 Once they were in she made move to go back out but Tilly stopped her with her hold still on Michael’s wrist. “You’re not going back are you?”

 “I still have work to do.” Michael said and tried to gently remove her wrist. She didn’t actually want to hurt Tilly after all.

 “You need some sleep.” Tilly said and raised her head stubbornly which only lasted for a second before she met Michael’s eyes. “Please?”

 Michael held in her sigh and nodded. “Very well.” She’d see if she could sneak out when Tilly was asleep again.

 Tilly beamed at her and let go of her wrist and Michael suddenly felt cold but knew logically it was just because of the sudden absence of warmth where it had been. She rubbed at her wrist anyway.

 “You know Michael I’m glad you’re my roommate.” Tilly said between another yawn as she slipped back under her covers. “It was pretty lonely in here.”

 Michael hesitated for a second. “I was…lonely as well.” She had been. It hurt to say but with the ostracization from the rest of it reminded her of her years on Vulcan never being accepted by her peers. On the Shenzhou Philippa had always been there as her friend and mentor. Discovery felt empty in that way.

 “Well now you’ve got me.” Tilly said and there wasn’t a hint of doubt in her voice. “Night Michael.” The lights overhead turned off at Tilly’s command and Michael laid on her bed, thinking.

 “Good night Tilly.” She said after a few minutes when she was sure that Tilly was still asleep anyway. It wasn’t Vulcan of her to admit her loneliness but it sure felt human.

 She took a deep breath, purging all emotions from her mind as she’d been taught as a child. The warm assurance that Tilly was there however remained. The snoring from the other side of the room helped with that.

 ~~

 The tricorder was long since broken and Michael’s right arm was burning with whatever acid had dripped on to it. Tilly was pressed against her other side with Michael’s left arm slung over her shoulder and was rambling on about how much trouble they were in.

 Michael wished, not for the first time, that she was a Vulcan so she could help calm Tilly down.

 “Breathe.” She murmured in Tilly’s ear instead and Tilly sucked in a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

 “Okay. Okay. What do we do?” Tilly still sounded worried but at least not as panicked as before.

 “We need to contact the others. We’ll have to set up a distress beacon. I can walk you through it.” With her right arm out of use currently she couldn’t do it.

 Tilly helped her get seated on a piece of rubble on the planet they’d landed on. They’d answered a distress beacon of their own only to find it was a trap for some kind of alien gladiatorial arena where they forced species to fight each other.

 Michael had bested whatever species had hurt her arm with it’s poison and Tilly had been quick to blow a hole in the arena with chemicals she found around them and gotten them out but they were still in trouble wandering the world aimlessly and no idea where their crewmates were.

 Tilly listened as Michael instructed her, every second it hurt to talk more and more and she had feeling the poison was spreading. She wanted to shut her eyes and just succumb to sleep to not feel the pain but she knew she had to stay awake.

 “You don’t look so good.” Tilly said once the beacon was set up and she’d rushed to Michael’s side again. “This isn’t good.” She had pushed up Michael’s sleeve and the poison was indeed running up her arm now. “It hurts doesn’t it?” She didn’t let Michael answer. “That’s a stupid question of course it does. I’m sorry I asked it. Is there…anything I can do?” Her eyes looked wet as she looked at Michael, close to tears.

 Michael gritted her teeth before she answered to steel herself from the pain. “We just have to wait until we’re answered.”

 Tilly hovered over her, fluttering between her and the beacon and looking more desperate as the minutes ticked by.

 Michael licked her lips, “Tilly-” She paused, “Syliva.”

 Tilly’s head shot up at her first name, her mouth dropped open in surprise.

 “If I don’t make it-” Michael began.

 “You’re going to!” Tilly blurted out before she could continue. “You’re going to and, and, I’ll bring you plomeek soup! And read you Alice in Wonderland while you’re stuck in medbay and um.” Tilly stopped, her shoulders falling. “You can’t die.”

 Michael laughed quietly, more a huff under her breath than anything else at the idea of Tilly annoying the other patients in medbay as she’d constantly visit Michael. She’d constantly be there and Michael knew it.

 Before she could answer though a ship’s light felt over them, wind whipping around them as the ship landed.

 “Looks like you’ll have to.” Michael said drily and Tilly wiped at her eyes to get rid of the tears though it did no good. She helped Michael get up and to the ship, staying right next to her the whole ride back even as medical poked at her.

 ~~

 True to her word Tilly was there every second she could be and they’d eventually kicked Michael out to recuperate in their room instead. She was off the duty roster for one week and it was making her feel twitchy but Tilly came back after the shift with padds of data for her to look at and stories of what they’d done that day.

 She sat on Michael’s bed, right next to Michael. The first time she’d done it Michael had shifted even closer to the wall and been somewhat annoyed. Now she pressed right against Tilly as they looked over the data.

 She was still scrolling through it as Tilly fell asleep on her bed and Michael knew she should wake her so Tilly could move to her own and not have to worry about possible rashes but a few minutes couldn’t hurt.

 Her right hand still hung at her side as she scrolled with her left and her fingers brushed by Tilly’s own, taking in the comforting warmth.

 ~~

 At some point they’d moved to Tilly’s bed over the course of the weeks so that when Tilly inevitably fell asleep all Michael would have to do was move over to her own. She usually still ended up staying there for a little while longer.

 Some nights Tilly’s head would drop on to her shoulder and Michael would stiffen for a second before allowing it.

She knew logically this wasn’t just what friends would do and she was staring too long at Tilly these days, noting the shape of her lips as she smiled and the flush in her cheeks as she laughed. Perhaps at some point something would come of it, she’d noticed Tilly staring more as well.

 If it did, she thought with her fingers entwined with Tilly’s as they’d gotten somewhere between the afternoon, she didn’t think she’d mind it at all.

[9beautyfashion]

Best Pre-shave gel with aloe vera to protect your sensitive skin

Best Pre-Shave Gel - To stay hygienic we need to take care of our body internally as well as externally. For internal care, we do many things such as good eating habits, exercises, etc. But to maintain external hygiene we sometimes lose our focus and we do not do anything. One such example is shaving the unwanted hairs from our body which can be anywhere. For some people, it's still a taboo to even talk about shaving. But today this article's main focus will be around shaving of unwanted hairs along with the proper care of the skin.

Things to keep in mind before shaving

In shaving (which can be anywhere) the initial and main aim is to prepare the skin. Moreover to soften your hair for a perfect and smooth shave. There are many mistakes which we might do knowingly or unknowingly. Some of the are a selection of a bad razor or an unsuitable razor. In addition, shaving pattern i.e, against the grain, not preparing the skin for a shave, etc also contribute. For a good shave, first of all, we need to set up a simple routine. Now the next part on which we are more focused is the preparation of the hairs. Below are a few points regarding the same. The best time to shave is just after a shower with hot water. The hot water will soften the hairs and will make them ready for the shave.The choice of a razor is also important which can be figured according to your skin type. Please note that the number of blades is not going to help you in any way, so pick your razor carefully.The next main point is the selection of a preshave gel. It is always advised to use a good preshave gel which will soften the hairs and prepare the skin for a shave.

What is Aloe Vera?

Before starting I would like to say that pre-shave gel, must include aloe vera and why they should include aloe vera, Let us discuss  some benefits of aloe vera: Aloe vera is a cactus-like plant regarded for its recuperation and medicinal properties. Its stems store water, developing a clear, gel-like substance inside the leaves, which includes vitamins, antioxidants, minerals, and amino acids. The gel from aloe has been used throughout statistics to treat a variety of pores and skin conditions, which include burns, frostbite, psoriasis. Aloe Vera is different as it not simplest contains all the vitamins and antioxidants your skin desires, but it could also be used as a spot treatment for acne.  Usually, spot remedies are known to dry out your skin, however, Aloe Vera is truly recognized for being extraordinarily hydrating and can also be used uncooked as a moisturizer within the proper form. Other blessings of using Aloe Vera on your pores and skin encompass anti-aging, boosting cell turnover, and of course, soothing and recovery burns or redness. Basically, this stuff is the remedy for all skin concerns.

Which is better? Shaving Cream or Gel?

Here we are discussing the best pre-shave gel for a perfect and smooth shave. First of all the main reason to use a preshave gel is because it helps in the following two ways which are listed below.          1. It prepares the hairs for a shave.          2. It also prepares the skin for a shave as well as aftershave which is reducing razor burns and provide a layer of antiseptic. Now one question which may arise in everyone's mind that why can't we use shaving cream, well there are many points which we can consider here. First of all its not facial hair which we are shaving. We all know that the facial skin and hairs are always exposed so they are not similar to hairs on the body as well as private parts. Thus we can not use any alcohol-based shaving cream and foam to shave the private parts and underarms. Doing so may lead to irritated skin with lots of razor burns. And secondly, the movement of the razor on the face of men is totally different. Thus we can conclude it from here that shaving gel is the best alternative for women.

Best Pre-shave Gel

As we know that the shaving gel is composed of mainly water and oil which on the application on the skin forms a layer that helps in a smooth movement of the razor. And the leftover excess of oil will act as an antiseptic on razor cuts. One of the best products available on amazon is Gillette Satin Care Sensitive Skin Pre Shave Gel with Aloe Vera. The product comes in a massive metal can with an easy to use nozzle, I am no longer sure if it's also available in a smaller journey pleasant size. Coming to the shave gel it comes out as a blue-colored gel in the beginning upon spreading it straight away turns to thick white creamy foam. It produces very rich foam, and a very small amount is required. We need to be cautious while doling out the product with a mild hand, as now and again the pump dispenses a little extra than required. It has a moderate floral perfume to it which lingers for some time which I find pretty pleasing. It creates a thick layer onto the skin which efficaciously prevents any nicks and cuts while shaving. The instructions claim to apply it over wet skin. However, it performs better over dry or simply slightly damp pores. Also, it gives better control for a more in-depth shave as well. It no longer aggravates my sensitive skin at all. Also, it efficiently prevents all dryness and slight inflammation on my pores and skin after shaving.

Benefits of Aloe Vera on Skin

1.      It locks the moisture by creating a protective barrier on the skin which helps in keeping the skin moisturized aftershave. 2.      The cooling effect of aloe vera on the skin helps in reducing the razor burns. 3.      The antiseptic and healing property of aloe vera helps in the healing of any unfortunate razor cuts. 4.      Aloe vera gel is able to get absorbed 4 times quicker than water. Thus it reaches some of the deepest tissues under the skin. Moreover, it provides the nutrients there. Do I suggest Gillette Satin Care Sensitive Skin Shave Gel with Aloe Vera? As I stated before I love this product and it's a must-have for me. I propose it to everyone seeking out a very good shave gel, specifically for those with sensitive skin. Read the full article

[allyinthekeyofx]

Blurring the lines 2/5

Chapter one here

CHAPTER TWO

Mulder is watching me. Even without looking up I can feel his eyes on me. Can feel the confusion that radiates from him in waves, swirling and eddying around the office space we share and even though I have removed myself to the farthest corner I can – an area that Mulder once referred to as being mine – I know that far away is currently not far enough to escape his scrutiny. Because he knows, just as he knew when I was trying desperately to hide my gradual decline from him when I was in the grip of my cancer, that this is my hiding place, partially separated from each other by a flimsy partition of wood and glass and which offers us a physical barrier, offers us space to breathe. But it didn’t prevent him scrutinising me back then, searching for the slightest sign that I was struggling more than I was prepared to admit and it isn’t preventing him scrutinising me now.

We are both confined to desk duty, more for Mulders benefit than mine because although he swiftly divested himself of the sling that was meant to support his injured shoulder, he is in no shape to be out in the field. The wound had been ragged; stitched together just barely at Mulders absolute refusal to entertain any suggestions of grafts and surgery and lengthy recuperation. It would heal, he had insisted, if he scarred he scarred. So he had escaped surgery by a whisker, promising to keep the sling on and his arm elevated for at least a week. His good intentions lasted a scant two days. I didn’t waste my breath arguing against his decision. Over the years I have learned to keep my own counsel – to know which battles are worth fighting regarding his cavalier attitude toward his own health and wellbeing.

The days have dragged monotonously for both of us I think and while initially Mulder tried to draw me out of myself, after a while he gave up and became as silent as I have been. Because I can’t bring myself to speak to him – at least not on a personal level and while I politely respond to his work-related queries, he is left with absolutely no doubt that anything else is currently off limits. So instead he just watches me, the silence that stretches between us punctuated only by the occasional rustling of paper, of the muted crack of a shell casing that he has manipulated between his teeth to release the tiny prize within. It’s a sound that, over the years I have come to regard as being uniquely his and I can’t count the amount of times I have awoken in the darkness of yet another anonymous motel room, heart pounding in panic from whichever monster has visited my dreams, to hear the sound of my partner cracking sunflower seeds between his teeth. How often I have felt safe and protected by the knowledge that he is just a few feet away from me; that should I call out to him he would be by my side in seconds, swiftly analysing just what I need from him whether it be by touch or by words he would find a way to affirm that I am okay.

To my intense embarrassment my eyes suddenly start to burn and I feel my throat begin to close as the words blur on the report I have been attempting to concentrate my attention on for the past hour or so and not for the first time I realise I am close to unravelling right there in front of him.

For exactly what reason I feel like this I am less sure. But as the days have passed since that moment the world celebrated I have become more and more morose, a feeling that is ridiculous in the extreme given that I am reacting this way because of a stupid unguarded moment from both of us. A kiss. Just a kiss for Gods sake. A kiss that neither he nor I have even attempted to acknowledge; him because I suspect for him it was a sweet but insignificant moment in our lives and me because I am afraid of him telling me that is exactly what it was. And he would say all the right things to me, try to make light of his actions and totally fail to notice me dying inside right there in front of him. So instead I have said nothing and concentrated instead on just trying to get through each day with a man who seems to be content to sit and suffocate me with his unspoken concern.

And suddenly I just can’t take it anymore, I can’t remain in that office for even a second longer without screaming at him, without striking out at him for breaking the rules and blurring the lines and making me feel like the world has ended. Because he is my world and I have been content to love him from within the confines of the walls I have worked so hard to build around myself. Walls, which now threaten to come tumbling down. The pressure that has been building is just suddenly too much and I just can’t do it anymore. Any of it.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Mulder become rigid in his posture as I stumble to my feet, pushing the chair back and wincing at the grating sound of metal against tile.

“Scully?”

His voice is soft, questioning; the underlying concern only barely contained beneath the surface. But I don’t look at him. I can’t.

Instead I grab my heavy winter coat from where it hangs still slightly damp from the morning snowfall I got caught in on my way to work, not bothering to waste time in shrugging it on before I head for the door.

“I don’t feel well Mulder. I’m going home.”

A part of me desperately hopes he will follow me, grasp a hold of my arm and force me to acknowledge him.

But he doesn’t. A glance behind me as I exit the office sees him as though frozen in time, brow furrowed; mouth slightly agape at my sudden departure and it’s only when I am sure that I am alone, when the elevator doors slide shut, do I allow the first tear to fall.

XXXXXXXXX

I finally arrive home just before 11:30 and I’m actually surprised how easy it was to find a cab on the slush covered streets that was available for hire. The weather was set to turn bad later in the day and was in part at least, the reason I had opted not to drive in to work that morning although if I’m honest I was also aware that snow covered roads coupled with my current emotionally confused state was an accident waiting to happen. My cell phone had rung insistently every five minutes or so and eventually, as it’s strident tones filled the warm interior of the cab for the third time and I saw the driver huff in silent annoyance I simply removed it from my pocket and switched it off, feeling just a tiny pang of guilt as Mulders name disappeared and the screen went blank.

I was unsurprised therefore to find, when I entered my apartment, that the small red light on my answering machine was blinking accusingly at me and although my first instinct was to just ignore it while I got changed in to more comfortable attire, by the time I exited my bedroom dressed in worn blue jeans and soft cream cable knit sweater, the guilt at ignoring Mulder had begun to prickle at me in a singularly uncomfortable way. He had left four messages, which by Mulders standards was pretty tame although I could detect a subtle increase in urgency by the time the fourth one began to play; his voice pitched slightly higher, the cadence of his words a little more rapid.

ummm Scully it’s me again...I guess you aren’t home yet but when you get this message.....ah shit forget it. Stay where you are okay?....I’m coming over to you...

I don’t listen to the rest of the message even though I know there is more, because I suddenly feel trapped, panicked even. Because it’s one thing to remain detached from him in a work environment but something altogether different when we are on our home turf; and I don’t want this, I don’t want this to become blown up in to something it isn’t. I just need time alone to get things straight in my head; time alone away from him.

So I do the only thing that makes sense to me amid the confusion that is raging within me– I seek to escape – grabbling my warm parka with the fur-lined hood before stuffing my feet in to my winter boots I exit the apartment before I can change my mind.

XXXXXX

I’m not sure how long I have sat here, just sat here amidst the snow covered shrubs and bushes that have been softened and melded together by the snow that fell briefly but heavily this morning and while the pristine whiteness in the city has already been rendered a dirty grey slushy mess by the DC traffic, here it is virtually untouched – a sparkling white canvas which is breathtaking in its simplicity. This part of the park is slightly off the beaten track, set back from the runner’s routes with a couple of benches that afford an unobstructed view of the lake that is now magically transformed in to a solid sheet of gleaming ice, weak sunshine bouncing off it in almost blinding intensity to reflect back on the untouched virginal snow that blankets the area around it’s edges. And it’s so peaceful here; the snow has insulated this small oasis from the sounds of traffic, of people, of life. Even the birds are silent, no doubt huddled together with fluffed feathers to capture and keep the warm air against their small bodies in the midst of a DC winter. And that thought makes me aware that I am beginning to feel cold despite the down filling in my jacket, and even though it is long enough to reach mid thigh, the cold metal of the bench beneath me isn’t the ideal surface to spend any length of time on at this time of year and a chill is starting to work its way up my back. The logical part of me knows that at some point I will have to return to my apartment and with that knowledge comes a realisation that Mulder will be there, and while he probably won’t presume to let himself in with his key, he will camp outside the door for as long as it takes for me to arrive back. Seven years in his company has taught me many things regarding his character and the man has the stubbornness of a mule with regards to keeping his word. And if he has decided to come check on me, I would find him still sitting there waiting for me hours later. He’s done it before. Today will be no different.

But I don’t know how I can even begin to confide in him the way I am feeling right now, knowing that despite my earlier anger he has no idea what he has done to garner such an extreme reaction from me.

Just a kiss Dana. It was just a kiss. Nothing more and nothing less. And maybe if I keep telling myself that I might even start to believe it.

Yeah. Right.

I swipe angrily at my nose, trying to persuade myself that the sudden urge to sniff is only about the cold and not about the tears that have once again filmed my vision, gathering unbidden and blurring the scene in front of me; and I hate this. This is not me. This is not who I am. Or at least it’s not who I used to be. So I blink quickly, my vision clearing as I feel wetness once again on my face, the tears instantly growing cold in the frigid air, and concentrate instead on the lone swan that is swiping at the soft snow with its long orange beak in an attempt to find a morsel of food to satisfy its hunger.

Bread. I should have brought bread.

And suddenly I tense as a slight weight drops on to my shoulder, an unseen presence behind me whose voice is as familiar to me as my own and infinitely more precious, his hand squeezing my shoulder gently as he speaks softly.

“Did you know swans mate for life Scully? That even though they know that they will be alone if one dies, they still take a chance on each other? That the chance of happiness is worth the potential heartbreak it might bring?”

And then he is right there in front of me, pulling me gently to my feet and resting his gloved hand against my cheek, rotating his thumb to make small circles against my skin. I can smell the leather, warm and fragrant, mingling with the scent of him.

“I suspect” he drops a kiss on my forehead, breathing in to my hair “That we could learn a few things from them” before tipping my head so he can look at me properly.

His expression is intense, his eyes dark green and fathomless, hard to read for most people but not for me.

“Don’t you think?”

Continued chapter 3

[readbookywooks]

17 Blindsided. That's how I feel when Haymitch tells me in the hospital. I fly down the steps to Command, mind racing a mile a minute, and burst right into a war meeting. "What do you mean, I'm not going to the Capitol? I have to go! I'm the Mockingjay!" I say. Coin barely looks up from her screen. "And as the Mockingjay, your primary goal of unifying the districts against the Capitol has been achieved. Don't worry - if it goes well, we'll fly you in for the surrender." The surrender? "That'll be too late! I'll miss all the fighting. You need me - I'm the best shot you've got!" I shout. I don't usually brag about this, but it's got to be at least close to true. "Gale's going." "Gale has shown up for training every day unless occupied with other approved duties. We feel confident he can manage himself in the field," says Coin. "How many training sessions do you estimate you've attended?" None. That's how many. "Well, sometimes I was hunting. And...I trained with Beetee down in Special Weaponry." "It's not the same, Katniss," says Boggs. "We all know you're smart and brave and a good shot. But we need soldiers in the field. You don't know the first thing about executing orders, and you're not exactly at your physical peak." "That didn't bother you when I was in Eight. Or Two, for that matter," I counter. "You weren't originally authorized for combat in either case," says Plutarch, shooting me a look that signals I'm about to reveal too much. No, the bomber battle in 8 and my intervention in 2 were spontaneous, rash, and definitely unauthorized. "And both resulted in your injury," Boggs reminds me. Suddenly, I see myself through his eyes. A smallish seventeen-year-old girl who can't quite catch her breath since her ribs haven't fully healed. Disheveled. Undisciplined. Recuperating. Not a soldier, but someone who needs to be looked after. "But I have to go," I say. "Why?" asks Coin. I can't very well say it's so I can carry out my own personal vendetta against Snow. Or that the idea of remaining here in 13 with the latest version of Peeta while Gale goes off to fight is unbearable. But I have no shortage of reasons to want to fight in the Capitol. "Because of Twelve. Because they destroyed my district." The president thinks about this a moment. Considers me. "Well, you have three weeks. It's not long, but you can begin training. If the Assignment Board deems you fit, possibly your case will be reviewed." That's it. That's the most I can hope for. I guess it's my own fault. I did blow off my schedule every single day unless something suited me. It didn't seem like much of a priority, jogging around a field with a gun with so many other things going on. And now I'm paying for my negligence. Back in the hospital, I find Johanna in the same circumstance and spitting mad. I tell her about what Coin said. "Maybe you can train, too." "Fine. I'll train. But I'm going to the stinking Capitol if I have to kill a crew and fly there myself," says Johanna. "Probably best not to bring that up in training," I say. "But it's nice to know I'll have a ride." Johanna grins, and I feel a slight but significant shift in our relationship. I don't know that we're actually friends, but possibly the wordallies would be accurate. That's good. I'm going to need an ally. The next morning, when we report for training at 7:30, reality slaps me in the face. We've been funneled into a class of relative beginners, fourteen- or fifteen-year-olds, which seems a little insulting until it's obvious that they're in far better condition than we are. Gale and the other people already chosen to go to the Capitol are in a different, accelerated phase of training. After we stretch - which hurts - there's a couple of hours of strengthening exercises - which hurt - and a five-mile run - which kills. Even with Johanna's motivational insults driving me on, I have to drop out after a mile. "It's my ribs," I explain to the trainer, a no-nonsense middle-aged woman we're supposed to address as Soldier York. "They're still bruised." "Well, I'll tell you, Soldier Everdeen, those are going to take at least another month to heal up on their own," she says. I shake my head. "I don't have a month." She looks me up and down. "The doctors haven't offered you any treatment?" "Is there a treatment?" I ask. "They said they had to mend naturally." "That's what they say. But they could speed up the process if I recommend it. I warn you, though, it isn't any fun," she tells me. "Please. I've got to get to the Capitol," I say. Soldier York doesn't question this. She scribbles something on a pad and sends me directly back to the hospital. I hesitate. I don't want to miss any more training. "I'll be back for the afternoon session," I promise. She just purses her lips. Twenty-four needle jabs to my rib cage later, I'm flattened out on my hospital bed, gritting my teeth to keep from begging them to bring back my morphling drip. It's been by my bed so I can take a hit as needed. I haven't used it lately, but I kept it for Johanna's sake. Today they tested my blood to make sure it was clean of the painkiller, as the mixture of the two drugs - the morphling and whatever's set my ribs on fire - has dangerous side effects. They made it clear I would have a difficult couple of days. But I told them to go ahead. It's a bad night in our room. Sleep's out of the question. I think I can actually smell the ring of flesh around my chest burning, and Johanna's fighting off withdrawal symptoms. Early on, when I apologize about cutting off her morphling supply, she waves it off, saying it had to happen anyway. But by three in the morning, I'm the target of every colorful bit of profanity District 7 has to offer. At dawn, she drags me out of bed, determined to get to training. "I don't think I can do it," I confess. "You can do it. We both can. We're victors, remember? We're the ones who can survive anything they throw at us," she snarls at me. She's a sick greenish color, shaking like a leaf. I get dressed. We must be victors to make it through the morning. I think I'm going to lose Johanna when we realize it's pouring outside. Her face turns ashen and she seems to have ceased breathing. "It's just water. It won't kill us," I say. She clenches her jaw and stomps out into the mud. Rain drenches us as we work our bodies and then slog around the running course. I bail after a mile again, and I have to resist the temptation to take off my shirt so the cold water can sizzle off my ribs. I force down my field lunch of soggy fish and beet stew. Johanna gets halfway through her bowl before it comes back up. In the afternoon, we learn to assemble our guns. I manage it, but Johanna can't hold her hands steady enough to fit the parts together. When York's back is turned, I help her out. Even though the rain continues, the afternoon's an improvement because we're on the shooting range. At last, something I'm good at. It takes some adjusting from a bow to a gun, but by the end of the day, I've got the best score in my class. We're just inside the hospital doors when Johanna declares, "This has to stop. Us living in the hospital. Everyone views us as patients." It's not a problem for me. I can move into our family compartment, but Johanna's never been assigned one. When she tries to get discharged from the hospital, they won't agree to let her live alone, even if she comes in for daily talks with the head doctor. I think they may have put two and two together about the morphling and this only adds to their view that she's unstable. "She won't be alone. I'm going to room with her," I announce. There's some dissent, but Haymitch takes our part, and by bedtime, we have a compartment across from Prim and my mother, who agrees to keep an eye on us. After I take a shower, and Johanna sort of wipes herself down with a damp cloth, she makes a cursory inspection of the place. When she opens the drawer that holds my few possessions, she shuts it quickly. "Sorry." I think how there's nothing in Johanna's drawer but her government-issued clothes. That she doesn't have one thing in the world to call her own. "It's okay. You can look at my stuff if you want." Johanna unlatches my locket, studying the pictures of Gale, Prim, and my mother. She opens the silver parachute and pulls out the spile and slips it onto her pinkie. "Makes me thirsty just looking at it." Then she finds the pearl Peeta gave me. "Is this - ?" "Yeah," I say. "Made it through somehow." I don't want to talk about Peeta. One of the best things about training is, it keeps me from thinking of him. "Haymitch says he's getting better," she says. "Maybe. But he's changed," I say. "So have you. So have I. And Finnick and Haymitch and Beetee. Don't get me started on Annie Cresta. The arena messed us all up pretty good, don't you think? Or do you still feel like the girl who volunteered for your sister?" she asks me. "No," I answer. "That's the one thing I think my head doctor might be right about. There's no going back. So we might as well get on with things." She neatly returns my keepsakes to the drawer and climbs into the bed across from me just as the lights go out. "You're not afraid I'll kill you tonight?" "Like I couldn't take you," I answer. Then we laugh, since both our bodies are so wrecked, it will be a miracle if we can get up the next day. But we do. Each morning, we do. And by the end of the week, my ribs feel almost like new, and Johanna can assemble her rifle without help. Soldier York gives the pair of us an approving nod as we knock off for the day. "Fine job, Soldiers." When we move out of hearing, Johanna mutters, "I think winning the Games was easier." But the look on her face says she's pleased. In fact, we're almost in good spirits when we go to the dining hall, where Gale's waiting to eat with me. Receiving a giant serving of beef stew doesn't hurt my mood either. "First shipments of food arrived this morning," Greasy Sae tells me. "That's real beef, from District Ten. Not any of your wild dog." "Don't remember you turning it down," Gale tosses back. We join a group that includes Delly, Annie, and Finnick. It's something to see Finnick's transformation since his marriage. His earlier incarnations - the decadent Capitol heartthrob I met before the Quell, the enigmatic ally in the arena, the broken young man who tried to help me hold it together - these have been replaced by someone who radiates life. Finnick's real charms of self-effacing humor and an easygoing nature are on display for the first time. He never lets go of Annie's hand. Not when they walk, not when they eat. I doubt he ever plans to. She's lost in some daze of happiness. There are still moments when you can tell something slips in her brain and another world blinds her to us. But a few words from Finnick call her back. Delly, who I've known since I was little but never gave much thought to, has grown in my estimation. She was told what Peeta said to me that night after the wedding, but she's not a gossip. Haymitch says she's the best defender I have when Peeta goes off on some kind of tear about me. Always taking my side, blaming his negative perceptions on the Capitol's torture. She has more influence on him than any of the others do, because he really does know her. Anyway, even if she's sugarcoating my good points, I appreciate it. Frankly, I could use a little sugarcoating. I'm starving and the stew is so delicious - beef, potatoes, turnips, and onions in a thick gravy - that I have to force myself to slow down. All around the dining hall, you can feel the rejuvenating effect that a good meal can bring on. The way it can make people kinder, funnier, more optimistic, and remind them it's not a mistake to go on living. It's better than any medicine. So I try to make it last and join in the conversation. Sop up the gravy on my bread and nibble on it as I listen to Finnick telling some ridiculous story about a sea turtle swimming off with his hat. Laugh before I realize he's standing there. Directly across the table, behind the empty seat next to Johanna. Watching me. I choke momentarily as the gravy bread sticks in my throat. "Peeta!" says Delly. "It's so nice to see you out...and about." Two large guards stand behind him. He holds his tray awkwardly, balanced on his fingertips since his wrists are shackled with a short chain between them. "What's with the fancy bracelets?" asks Johanna. "I'm not quite trustworthy yet," says Peeta. "I can't even sit here without your permission." He indicates the guards with his head. "Sure he can sit here. We're old friends," says Johanna, patting the space beside her. The guards nod and Peeta takes a seat. "Peeta and I had adjoining cells in the Capitol. We're very familiar with each other's screams." Annie, who's on Johanna's other side, does that thing where she covers her ears and exits reality. Finnick shoots Johanna an angry look as his arm encircles Annie. "What? My head doctor says I'm not supposed to censor my thoughts. It's part of my therapy," replies Johanna. The life has gone out of our little party. Finnick murmurs things to Annie until she slowly removes her hands. Then there's a long silence while people pretend to eat. "Annie," says Delly brightly, "did you know it was Peeta who decorated your wedding cake? Back home, his family ran the bakery and he did all the icing." Annie cautiously looks across Johanna. "Thank you, Peeta. It was beautiful." "My pleasure, Annie," says Peeta, and I hear that old note of gentleness in his voice that I thought was gone forever. Not that it's directed at me. But still. "If we're going to fit in that walk, we better go," Finnick tells her. He arranges both of their trays so he can carry them in one hand while holding tightly to her with the other. "Good seeing you, Peeta." "You be nice to her, Finnick. Or I might try and take her away from you." It could be a joke, if the tone wasn't so cold. Everything it conveys is wrong. The open distrust of Finnick, the implication that Peeta has his eye on Annie, that Annie could desert Finnick, that I do not even exist. "Oh, Peeta," says Finnick lightly. "Don't make me sorry I restarted your heart." He leads Annie away after giving me a concerned glance. When they're gone, Delly says in a reproachful voice, "He did save your life, Peeta. More than once." "For her." He gives me a brief nod. "For the rebellion. Not for me. I don't owe him anything." I shouldn't rise to the bait, but I do. "Maybe not. But Mags is dead and you're still here. That should count for something." "Yeah, a lot of things should count for something that don't seem to, Katniss. I've got some memories I can't make sense of, and I don't think the Capitol touched them. A lot of nights on the train, for instance," he says. Again the implications. That more happened on the train than did. That what did happen - those nights I only kept my sanity because his arms were around me - no longer matters. Everything a lie, everything a way of misusing him. Peeta makes a little gesture with his spoon, connecting Gale and me. "So, are you two officially a couple now, or are they still dragging out the star-crossed lover thing?" "Still dragging," says Johanna. Spasms cause Peeta's hands to tighten into fists, then splay out in a bizarre fashion. Is it all he can do to keep them from my neck? I can feel the tension in Gale's muscles next to me, fear an altercation. But Gale simply says, "I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself." "What's that?" asks Peeta. "You," Gale answers. "You'll have to be a little more specific," says Peeta. "What about me?" "That they've replaced you with the evil-mutt version of yourself," says Johanna. Gale finishes his milk. "You done?" he asks me. I rise and we cross to drop off our trays. At the door, an old man stops me because I'm still clutching the rest of my gravy bread in my hand. Something in my expression, or maybe the fact that I've made no attempt to conceal it, makes him go easy on me. He lets me stuff the bread in my mouth and move on. Gale and I are almost to my compartment when he speaks again. "I didn't expect that." "I told you he hated me," I say. "It's the way he hates you. It's so...familiar. I used to feel like that," he admits. "When I'd watch you kissing him on the screen. Only I knew I wasn't being entirely fair. He can't see that." We reach my door. "Maybe he just sees me as I really am. I have to get some sleep." Gale catches my arm before I can disappear. "So that's what you're thinking now?" I shrug. "Katniss, as your oldest friend, believe me when I say he's not seeing you as you really are." He kisses my cheek and goes. I sit on my bed, trying to stuff information from my Military Tactics books into my head while memories of my nights with Peeta on the train distract me. After about twenty minutes, Johanna comes in and throws herself across the foot of my bed. "You missed the best part. Delly lost her temper at Peeta over how he treated you. She got very squeaky. It was like someone stabbing a mouse with a fork repeatedly. The whole dining hall was riveted." "What'd Peeta do?" I ask. "He started arguing with himself like he was two people. The guards had to take him away. On the good side, no one seemed to notice I finished his stew." Johanna rubs her hand over her protruding belly. I look at the layer of grime under her fingernails. Wonder if the people in 7 ever bathe. We spend a couple of hours quizzing each other on military terms. I visit my mother and Prim for a while. When I'm back in my compartment, showered, staring into the darkness, I finally ask, "Johanna, could you really hear him screaming?" "That was part of it," she says. "Like the jabberjays in the arena. Only it was real. And it didn't stop after an hour. Tick, tock." "Tick, tock," I whisper back. Roses. Wolf mutts. Tributes. Frosted dolphins. Friends. Mockingjays. Stylists. Me. Everything screams in my dreams tonight.