#thanks for letting me revisit this in the activity tab

[chanse-mccrary]

*is cast now*

TOMMY ABSOLUTELY OWNED THAT EPISODE, MAKE HIM CAST PLEASE

[rocorambles]

A Game of Cat and Mouse

Pairing: Iwaizumi x Reader

Genre/Warnings: Cop and Criminal AU (Cop Iwaizumi, Criminal Reader), NSFW, Sex Toys, Degradation, Overstimulation, Bondage

Summary: Bad girls get punished. And criminals who go out of their way to make Iwaizumi’s life hell on a routine basis deserve extra special punishment.

Author’s Note: This is for the NSFW Haikyuu HQ Gifting Event! @multifandhoem I hope you enjoy~ (I really got carried away with the plot in this fic. One day I will learn how to write porn without plot, but for now, please accept my porn with way too much plot.)

Irritating Iwaizumi Hajime might be your favorite activity in the world. There’s just something so satisfying about watching his usually calm and stoic face shatter into an angry feral mess. And maybe, just maybe, something deep in your belly stirs as he growls and snarls at you, something primal in you writhing in excitement as he bares his teeth at you and chases you. 

You’ve lived a life of sins and crimes for as long as you can remember, but hard work has taken you a long way. So really, there isn’t any need for you to continue your petty thieving ways. You’re set for life with the money you’ve accrued from the countless successful exchanges you’ve made. It’s almost obscene just how much people are willing to pay for a few shiny stones or swatches of paint on a canvas. 

And yet you can’t help yourself from revisiting your bad habits of creeping in the shadows, analyzing floor plans, strategizing routes. Only now, your plans are centered around a brooding spiky haired cop with the most beautiful green eyes you’ve ever seen instead of the number of zeros at the end of a number. 

You don’t know exactly what about Iwaizumi resonates so strongly with you. Sure, he’s handsome, but you’ve run into your fair share of handsome officers. You dare say Officer Sawamura could give Iwaizumi a run for his money in the looks department.

Maybe it’s the hints of wildness you see underneath his straight-laced façade. 

Maybe it’s the fire you see blazing behind his reserved countenance.

Whatever it is has you keeping tabs on him, has you concocting plans just sloppy enough for Iwaizumi to get tantalizingly close to you, but put together enough to have you escaping his grasp each and every time. And you cackle at the way his eyes light up when he thinks he has you pinned down, only to furiously scowl at your retreating figure when you taunt him with a flirtatious air kiss and a cheeky “maybe next time, sir”. 

It’s an endless game of cat and mouse, but you don’t think you’ll ever tire of it. And you’re beginning to suspect that even Iwaizumi finds it amusing to a certain degree. 

You had been at a loss for words when the officer had merely trudged into the jewelry store you had been waiting for him in at your last heist, only to casually lean against the wall, folding his arms across his chest as he regarded you holding the store’s most expensive strings of diamonds and pearls in your hands, teasingly holding them up to his face. And you hesitantly lower your arm, unsure what to do as the silence and stillness of the night stretches. 

There’s no growled threats or pointed firearm in your face like there usually would be right about now. And you swear there’s a hint of a smirk on the handsome face across from you as the two of you just stand there, stuck in the strange heady tension filling the air. 

But you almost drop everything you’re holding at Iwaizumi’s next words. 

“If you want my attention that badly, there are better ways of going about it.” 

It’s Iwaizumi’s turn to laugh as your trademark smirk falls off the lower unmasked part of your face and he confidently saunters over to you, strong arms boxing you in against the glass counter, enjoying the rush of power he feels about the tables finally turning as you shyly look anywhere but at him. And something roars triumphantly inside of him when you gasp as he hooks his hand under your chin and forces you to meet him gaze on. 

“I’ve spent the last few months wracking my brain for answers. Why were you suddenly committing so many meaningless robberies? Robberies of stores and items so far beneath your caliber? Was it just coincidence that you were only committing crimes on the routes and nights I was working? Was I just imagining that it seemed like you were actively trying to avoid injuring me every time we clashed? None of it made any sense. But then your stupid flirting started and it made me think that maybe there was some rhyme and reason to your suddenly erratic behavior after all.” 

There’s silence as he lets you register his words and the rattling of jewelry as he plucks the expensive strands out of your hands and carelessly tosses them back in their case. But he softly smiles when you don’t deny his words and make no move to push him away or escape. 

“I believe in new beginnings and fresh starts, so when you’re done with your thieving ways, come find me. I’m curious about the woman under the mask.” 

It’s weeks before you have the courage to even secretly trail after Iwaizumi again after that encounter and even then, you don’t do anything but keep watch over him. 

His words echo in your mind and you don’t have the urge to steal and ring an alarm to beckon him towards you. Not when the greatest treasure of all is just within your grasp whenever you’re ready to summon the will to finally reveal your identity and meet him person to person in broad daylight instead of slithering around each other in the twisted tango of cop and criminal. 

But you aren’t ready yet and you merely keep tabs on him for now, curiosity and protectiveness getting the better of you, and if Iwaizumi notices the moving shadow that seems to follow him wherever he goes, he doesn’t bring attention to it. There’s something comforting, maybe even endearing, about how you’ve become a guardian angel of sorts to him, especially with the increasing body count and grizzly crimes being committed. And although he wishes you were safe and sound, tucked far away from the ricocheting bullets and corpses, his heart warms at the bouquet of lilies he finds on his doorsteps when he stumbles back home, empty and defeated, the weight of his partner’s death from a particularly bloody shootout still fresh on his mind. 

There’s no note, no letter, but he knows. Knows that it could only be you, knows that no one outside of his team or the criminals they had been fighting with could possibly know about the death so soon unless they happened to witness the scene. And that night he sobs himself to sleep, clutching your flowers to his chest, unaware of the way you forlornly stare at him from the roof across the street, heart aching and wishing more than anything that you weren’t such a coward, that you were brave enough to slip inside and comfort him in person. 

But life has a funny way of working, of not caring if you’re ready or not and your lives crash together once more in an unexpected way. 

Iwaizumi is promoted to lead the new task force aimed at squashing down the rising crime syndicates. You’re proud of him, but you can’t quell the anxiety that courses through you as you watch every raid that takes place, wondering if and when the day will come where he’ll be outmaneuvered, keeping your own skills sharp, praying that you’ll never have to use them again, but just in case…

And you thank whoever’s listening that you had kept up with your training as Iwaizumi’s team is ambushed and overpowered one night. Your heart drops and bile rises in your throat as officer after officer crumples to the floor, but you force yourself to calm down, to find an internal steady rhythm as you glide through the shadows, swiftly and secretly making your way towards the man you’ve become so attached to. 

You fight down the panic when you finally reach him, try to still the tremble in your hands as you quickly scan the growing dark red stain spreading across his shirt from his wounds, almost collapsing in relief when you find that they’re all superficial wounds, nothing life threatening or critical. 

The silent scuffle between the two of you is awful and you’re thankful that blood loss and pain have weakened him as you forcefully drag him away, nails gripping tightly into his skin as you roughly lead him to your apartment despite his struggling, despite his desperate desire to go back and help his few remaining teammates. And you’re both fiercely snarling at each other when you’re finally safe inside your apartment, fury raging in both of you as you snap at each other. 

“You should have let me stay and help!”

“So that you could end up dead like the rest of them? You were clearly outpowered and outnumbered!”

“Well you should have just let me die then, instead of helping me escape like a coward.” 

A resounding crack echoes throughout the room and it takes you some time to register the smarting pain in the palm of your hand and the fresh red mark on Iwaizumi’s cheek. But before you can even stutter an apology, a hand is fisting the front of your shirt and lips are crashing against yours in an angry impassioned act and you whimper as you are forced to taste his frustration and gratitude, his losses and gain, his despair and hope. 

And when he disconnects and the two of you gasp for much needed oxygen, you stand in the middle of your apartment, arms wrapped around each other, only the sounds of Iwaizumi’s sobs and your comforting words flitting through the air as he buries his face in the crook of your neck and you rub soothing patterns on his back. 

The rest of the night is a domestic peaceful drawl and you gently lead Iwaizumi to an armchair in your living room before scurrying away to rummage for your first aid kit and returning to kneel between his legs as you clean his injuries, apologizing as he winces at the sting of warm water and soap against his open wounds. There’s a soothing flow as you tend to him and you relax with every swipe of the towel, fingers and hands lingering just a tad longer than they should on his skin. But you stiffen when his uninjured arm raises and calloused fingers lightly trace the bottom of your mask. 

There’s an unspoken question in the way he delicately plays around with the corners of the fabric, but it seems deafening to you as your heart races. Maybe it’s the pure intentions in his eyes or the fact that your walls are weakened in the confines of your apartment, but either way, you don’t pull away, tilting your head up and stilling in silent confirmation. And something flutters in your chest as he gingerly removes your mask, heat rising to your face as green eyes stare at your face in awe for the first time, fingertips tracing every inch and line, mapping every groove reverently. 

It feels like eternity before you resume dipping the towel into the soapy water and treating him. But bandaged and deemed well, Iwaizumi is ushered to your shower and you shove a pile of clean towels and the largest loungewear you have into his hands, fully intent on locking him in the bathroom as you get a grip on yourself. But he has different plans in mind and you’re speechless as he firmly grasps your wrist before you can retreat with your tail between your legs. 

“Stay with me. Please.”

How could you possibly deny those honest eyes? 

Swipes of a soapbar against skin become intimate caresses and before you fully register what’s happening, you’re being pressed against the wall as Iwaizumi plunders your mouth, rough hands roaming all over your body as he fully explores everything you have to offer. You whimper as the hot water is suddenly turned off, the cold air crashing against you, but you let out a content sigh as a hot body wraps you in its embrace, carrying you to the sanctuary of your plush bedding. And all you know before you blissfully pass out is the sound of your wanton moans as you break apart over and over again, on Iwaizumi’s tongue, fingers, and cock, tears and drool cascading down your face as you alternate between begging for more and crying for him to let you rest before you ultimately pass out from the deliriously overwhelming ecstasy.

The sun is barely creeping in, a few slim tendrils slipping past the cracks of your window blinds when his eyes flutter open and something warm spreads in his chest as he slowly turns to observe your still soundly sleeping figure, a small upward quirk of his lips betraying how right it feels to wake up beside your vulnerable state. And although he can’t deny the allure of your body creeping through the night, he thinks that you’re the most beautiful like this, unmasked and body unconsciously seeking his presence and warmth as you curl into his space, your face nuzzling into his chest, head perfectly settled under his chin, the soft glow of sunlight enhancing your natural beauty. 

But he grimaces as his alarm continues to blaringly ring in the background, frowning as he reluctantly separates himself from you and carefully untangles himself from your bed sheets, quietly traipsing out of your room and dialing a number on his phone when he’s out of your earshot.   

Guilt and dread claw at him as the ringtone goes on and on and his throat is dry when he hears the authoritative voice through the speakers. 

“Iwaizumi? Are you okay?!”

Iwaizumi wishes he had a glass of water as he chokes out a polite greeting and he can feel hot tears prick at his eyes as he ceaselessly apologizes. Apologizing for abandoning his men. Apologizing for a failed mission. Apologizing for being such a failure as an officer, as a leader. 

But he quickly shuts up at the sharp tone that pierces his ear as Sawamura barks his name and he waits and waits, holding his breath, preparing to give up his badge, only to splutter in surprise at the warm relieved chuckle echoing across the speaker. 

“I’m glad you’re at least well enough to give me a headache with your wallowing. Good men died and we’re going to feel their loss for a long time. I won’t deny that. But no one blames you, Iwaizumi. You’re a good man, a great officer, and an even better leader. Rest up, grieve, mourn. Do whatever you need to do for the next few days. And when you’re ready, I expect to see you in my office so we can strategize about how we’re going to honor our fallen teammates by giving these criminals hell.”

He barely has time to stammer a “yes, sir” before the line clicks shut and the tears finally roll down his face as he clutches his phone in his hands, bittersweet gratefulness and sorrow blending together. And as his cries come to an end, a determined glint flickers in his eyes as he wipes the last of the salty trails away, the resolve of a man seeking vengeance forming inside of him. 

But that could wait until he was back in the swirl and chaos of the precinct. For now, he has other loose ends to tie and he quietly walks back to your room, smiling at the sight of your still slumbering figure nestled in your blankets as he makes his way towards you, intent on slipping back underneath the covers besides you. But he lets out a muffled pained curse as his foot knocks over a box besides your bed, the crash of objects dispersing across the wood floor rattling you awake, and you blearily blink your eyes open only to stare in shock and horror as Iwaizumi curiously holds up a set of black bondage restraints and a jeweled butt plug from among the scattered items, before sending an amused look and a quirked brow your way.    

If you were drowsy before, you’re wide awake now as you lunge out of bed, throwing yourself at Iwaizumi as you frantically try to regain possession of some of your most intimate belongings, pouting when he holds the items out of reach, a mischievous grin on his face as he looks down at you. 

“Are you familiar with the stoplight system?”

You pause your futile jumping as you try and bat your toys out of his hands, balking at the underlying meaning in his question, waiting for him to just laugh it off and move on. But when all he does is bring a warm hand to gently cup your face, his thumb brushing against your cheekbone as he patiently gazes at you, letting you make the final decision, you melt and lean into his touch, shyly nodding your head as you blissfully sigh at the way it feels so right for him to be touching you. 

“Words, princess. I’m not going to be gentle. Not after all the teasing and headaches you’ve caused me. So I need to be sure you’re ok with this, that it’s what you want.” 

Brief descriptions of red, yellow, and green are barely out of your mouth before you’re suddenly being forcefully shoved onto the bed, body instinctively flailing in self-defense as you try to register what’s happening while binds are roughly being wrapped around your wrists and ankles. But you mewl in arousal as Iwaizumi’s weight settles on top of you, his hard chest pressing you against the bed as he dexterously ties you up until you’re in a spread-eagled position underneath him, unable to move even an inch. And your breath hitches at the hungry look he pins you down with as he sits back and enjoys the view of your trussed up body on complete display for him. 

But you grow impatient as the minutes drag by and Iwaizumi gives you an unimpressed look as you begin to fight against your restraints, whining for him to get on with it already. And he shuts you up with a punishing pinch to your inner thigh that has you yelping before getting up from the bed and perusing your box of toys. 

You crane your neck in every way as you try to get a sneak peek of what he has in store for you, but Iwaizumi puts that idea to a screeching halt as he slips a blindfold around your head and all you know is darkness and anticipation. Despite the way you try to intently listen for any warning, you squeal in surprise when a hot wet mouth latches onto one of your nipples, fingers tweaking the other and your entire world narrows down to your two perky buds, the lewd wet sounds of sucking filling your ears. Mouth and hands alternate and you can’t keep up with the fluctuating patterns, your breath coming out in pants, your pussy beginning to glisten with arousal, and you sigh in relief when the assault stops, glad to have a moment of reprieve, only to wail when the intense pressure of nipple clamps sears through you, the cold weight of the chain connecting the two clamps piercing your senses as it settles onto your skin. 

Pain and pleasure echo through your mind so loudly that you don’t sense Iwaizumi moving until fingers suddenly slip inside your dripping pussy and your back arches, the nipple clamp chain jingling with the movement and a rush of humiliation courses through you when Iwaizumi chuckles, commenting on how wet you are already. 

“I was going to prep you a bit more, but looks like this cock hungry hole is more than ready.” 

You’re practically salivating as something hard nudges against your entrance, already delirious just from the prospect of being filled with Iwaizumi’s cock once again, but enthusiasm turns to confusion which turns to pleasured shock as your rabbit vibrator is shoved inside of you and immediately set to its highest setting, your clit and walls stimulated so sharply, so suddenly. 

It’s so good, but it’s not enough, it’s too much, it’s not what you want. 

“Haji-Hajime, please. Want to cum on your cock. Don’t want a toy! Too much. At least turn it down. Haji-AHHHH!” 

You scream as you’re forced to an orgasm, body convulsing, jaw going slack, and you wait for the toy to be removed, wait for the settings to be lowered, only for dread and disbelief to fill you as a sticky thick substance is being inserted into your puckered hole, a lubed finger slowly entering you, taking its time to explore and spread your tight hole as the vibrator continues to ravage your pussy and clit at full intensity. And drool begins to seep from the corners of your mouth as you tumble headfirst into overstimulation as a plug replaces the fingers inside of your ass, nestling inside of you as you come to terms with the overwhelming feeling of being double stuffed. 

“Ha-Hajime please please please. Too much. I can’t-”

The plug inside of you is teasingly pulled just enough for you to feel the stretch of your hole, only to be shoved inside you once again and words are too hard to think of as the vibrator is thrust in and out of you, the slick sounds of your gushing cunt embarrassingly loud even above your whimpers. 

“Maybe I should make you cum for every robbery you ever committed. Maybe then you’ll actually behave and be a law-abiding citizen. Would you like that? Being too fucked out to even think about breaking the law?”

“No! Please! I’m sorry. I’ll be good. I swear. Just please let me rest.” 

“Sorry, princess. Bad girls need to be punished.” 

A strangled sob escapes you as the vibrator is pushed even deeper inside of you, the smaller tip grinding even further into your clit and your cries are swallowed as Iwaizumi settles besides you, affectionately capturing your lips with his as he watches you break apart once again, smirking as your body and face try to draw closer to him, seeking comfort and relief as overwhelming pleasure drowns you. 

But he doesn’t stop. Not even when your begging and pleading turns into incoherent babbles and wanton noises. Not even when you’re too tired to even move, your body only twitching here and there from overstimulation, completely slack and mindless as pleasure melts your brain into mush. 

Only when the vibrator finally runs out of batteries hours later, the mechanical whirring coming to an end, does he finally relieve you of the object and you dazedly stare at him as he removes your tear-stained blindfold, slumping in relief that it’s finally over, wanting nothing more than to curl up in Iwaizumi’s arms and sleep for a long, long time. 

But he has other plans for the two of you and even in your exhausted state, your eyes fling wide open and you weakly whimper as he positions himself in between your legs, guiding his cock to your spent hole and easily slipping inside before caging you with his arms.

Your eyes roll back at the sudden intrusion and despite how wrecked you are, how used you feel, arousal once again begins to coil up inside of you as your walls accommodate the new object. 

All you can think about is the cock inside of you. All you can think about is the way it fills and stretches you. All you can think about is the way it drags against your sensitive walls as Iwaizumi begins to piston his hips in a brutal steady rhythm. 

The room is a cacophony of Iwaizumi’s grunts, your broken moans, the sound of skin slapping against skin and you can feel yourself losing to the pleasure as the now all too familiar knot in your stomach tightens once again, your body tensing and pulling taut against your restraints as something builds up inside of you. 

Iwaizumi isn’t doing much better, so pent up from watching you beautifully fall apart over and over again in front of him, so close to the real thing as he hovers above you, memorizing the blissed out look on your face, mentally recording every gorgeous sound that slips past your lips, and this time it’s all because of him. 

He increases his pace, groaning as your walls tighten around him as if they don’t ever want him to leave them empty, something feral inside of him howling as your mouth opens in a silent scream as you crash one last time, your body shaking and trembling, your cunt spasming around him as he spills long thick stripes inside of you. 

When there’s nothing left to give, every last drop of his essence deep within you, your body boneless and limp beneath him, he gently lays on top of you, burying his face in the space besides yours, murmuring praises and words of affirmation as he blankets your body with his. 

And when you finally come back to him, eyes looking a little more clear, voice regaining your sassy tone as you demand that he undo your restraints, he’s more than happy to oblige, carefully releasing you, rubbing every sore limb, letting you use him as your personal body pillow as you throw your arms and legs around him and bury your face into his chest, almost instantly falling into a deep exhausted slumber in the safety of his presence. 

There will be proper, much needed conversations and discussions when the two of you are both awake, sitting across each other with steaming mugs of coffee placed in front of you, hesitantly yet hopefully probing for answers. What are the two of you? What does the future hold for both of you? 

But for now, Iwaizumi lets his eyes shut, lets himself be lulled by the rhythmic rise and fall of your chest as he holds you close to him, protectively curling around you as sleep embraces him.

[jacaranda-bloom]

FIC WRITER QUESTIONS

Thank you to the lovely @allwaswell16 @runaway-train-works @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed @uhoh-but-yeah-alright and @evilovesyou for tagging me to answer some questions about my writing.

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

47

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

901,445 (Hoping to hit the Magic Million by the end of the year!)

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

1 (One Direction)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

When Tomorrow Comes 1155

The Baby Whisperer 950

Love, Ever After 898

Harry Poppins 856

Play Me A Memory 760

More under the cut…

5) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh gosh. Uhm. I don’t really write angsty endings? All my fics have Happy Endings and most have epilogues to round them out and tie them up in a bow. Perhaps I’d say If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow) purely because (spoiler ahead) the epilogue is written 100 years into the future so they’ve both passed.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Interestingly, I would actually say the answer is the same as above, If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow). The epilogue is so uplifting and I cry happy tears every time I re-read it. It’s written from the POV of their granddaughter and you get to see the world they had a hand in changing for the better through her eyes, so you get a sense of how impactful their lives were on the rest of society. Oof, tearing up right now just thinking about it.

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Yeah, I have actually. I really enjoy doing new takes on an existing universes, although they aren’t always the easiest thing to pull off tbh. I’m not sure which I would say is the craziest, but the hardest to write was definitely The Peter Pan/Hook AU.

Harry Poppins - Loosely based on the book/movie Mary Poppins, but without any magical aspects.

Playing To Win - Set in the Big Brother house.

The Pirate and The Piper - A Peter Pan/Hook AU which I took a lot of liberties with.

In The Still Of The Night - My Dirty Dancing AU.

A Hungry Heart - This is a Great British Bake Off AU that is due out in September for the Cliche Fic Fest!

8) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Whoa Nelly. Yeah, I do. All the time. Every fic actually. There’s only one, Exposed, the only fic I’ve published that’s not rated Explicit and doesn’t have smut. But, to be fair, the challenge was to write exactly 666 words and I still managed to get the implication in there. Plus, Louis was naked and Harry was applying body paint for the majority of the story, so like, I think I can get a free pass on that one - I tried!

In terms of what type of smut, I guess it varies depending on the story. I tend not to push the boat out too far, but I do dabble in BDSM in quite a few of my fics. A recurring theme in the comments I receive is that my smut scenes are well constructed and detailed, without being too tedious or drawn out, which is lovely feedback to get because they can be challenging to write.

9) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Absolutely. Every single one.

10) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not often, people are usually so kind, but there have been a couple.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah, quite a lot, particularly on Wattpad, all with my full consent. That said, I’m thinking of stopping this because it’s getting a bit out of hand and I’ve been feeling uncomfortable about it recently for various reasons that I won’t bore you with here. 

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope! I don’t think it’s really my thing tbh. I get very in my head about writing and struggle even to brainstorm or share too much until I’m well into a story.

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

Of the 47 fics I’ve written, there are 45 Larry, 1 Narry, and 1 Louis/Dermot O’Leary (I think mine is still the only fic with this ship hahahaa), so that’s probably a good indication of my fave writing ship.

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I have one lonely WIP sitting on AO3 from 2018. I keep promising myself I’ll finish it and it’s on my schedule every year, then I get distracted by other fics/fests and it gets pushed back. Plus, it needs a complete rewrite because my style has developed so much since I started it, so it’ll be a big job. Based on that, I think that the fic, in its current form, won’t ever be finished as the rewrite will completely wipe out what it was, although the underlying plot will still be there.

16) What are your writing strengths?

World building (or so I’m often told). I write very visually and people often say they can imagine the scene exactly, or that it’s like a movie, or that they think it’s actually a real place I’m describing, when most of the time it absolutely isn’t, it’s just something I’ve created in my weird brain.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue (although my lovely beta disagrees) and telling rather than showing. They’re both things I’m actively working on.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’ve never really considered it. It’s not something I’d shy away from necessarily, but it’s just never come up.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

One Direction. First and only.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Wow. This is really tough because it changes over time. I find that once I’ve finished a fic I don’t want to revisit it for a few months because I’m kind of over it. But I find comfort in them after a while, like I get to go back to that happy place and immerse myself in that world and the characters again, similar to catching up with an old friend. It’s familiar. I think I also like different stories for different reasons and I’m drawn to various ones depending on my mood. My top 3 (although, ask me next week and the list will probably be completely different!) would probably be:

1. If You’re Out There (I’ll Find You Somehow). Written for the hybrid fic fest (a fest I created just for this fic lol). It’s not everyone’s cup of tea due to the hybrid aspect, but it’s one of the stories I feel is the most rounded from a character development perspective and the world building was pretty epic, if I can be so bold as to throw that out there myself!

2. No Going Back. One of my Big Bangs from 2020. I adore the way their relationship develops in this fic and the setting (as remote lighthouse keepers) was such a lot of fun to write. Plus I got to collaborate with an amazing artist who created an entire website as an accompanying travel blog which was truly wonderful.

3. From The Heart. This is a series I wrote for wordplay back in 2019. I had no idea that what I was doing was so unusual and so meta by having Louis essentially write for the equivalent of wordplay in the fic. It was such an fun way to share my writing process and challenges I encounter (exactly how many synonyms tabs do I have open at any one time?!) and I thoroughly enjoyed the outcome (although getting there was definitely a struggle).

~

This was really fun and thanks to anyone who made it this far! Writing brings me so much joy and is a wonderful outlet for all the imaginings in my head, so I appreciate everyone who supports me and joins me on that journey.

~

I’m pretty late with this and I’m not sure who has already done it but I’ll tag @fallinglikethis @homosociallyyours @lululawrence @reminiscingintherain and @beau-soleil-louis if they’d like to do this and haven’t already.

[tickotaku]

Head cannons for Chuuya, Fyodor, and Tetcho in a relationship with an S/O.

Hello Anon! Thank you for waiting! This is my first time really writing and posting head-cannons, so they may not be exceptional. I ended making it pretty gender-neutral, and it doesn’t really have an intentional structure. Regardless, I hope you enjoy them! 

I’ve been sitting on the idea of writing on Tumblr for a while, so any feedback (positive or negative) is greatly appreciated. If you liked something or thought I could have done something differently. Even pointing out grammatical or punctuation errors can help me grow as a writer. (And I definitely have room to grow) Anyway, if you have any thoughts or tips at all, leave a comment or let me know somehow. 

Now that that’s said, enjoy! (Warning; Possible manga spoilers(?))

Chuuya Nakahara:

It takes a while for Chuuya to even consider being in a romantic relationship.

      He has a lot of responsibilities as it is, and having an S/O may damage his reputation and make him look soft.

      However, once he falls in love, he couldn’t care less about reputation. He can still be a ruthless mafioso while protecting his lover.

      If his S/o confesses first, he’d be stunned for a minute. Once he’s processed the info, he’ll be sweet as heck about accepting their feelings.

      If Chuuya confesses first, it’ll be like a grand proposal. We’re talking roses, music in the background, and a romantic poem.

     Chuuya will protect his S/O no matter what and make sure they feel loved.

      He’ll try not to go overboard with presents, but to him, his lover deserves the world. He’ll frequently leave notes of encouragement, baked treats, and little things. Holidays or occasions however, will have extravagant gifts. Jewelry, limited edition merchandise from their favorite series, a private island, etc. etc. He’s filthy rich, why not?

      If his S/O isn’t already in the mafia, it’s going to stay that way. He wants then in as little danger as possible. He knows they can take care of themselves, but he is not taking any chances.

    He loves pet names.

     If he gets flustered, he’ll push his hat down on his lovers head so the brim covers their eyes. Once he recovers he won’t shut up about how cute they look in his hat.

      Call him short, just try. It doesn’t matter how tall his S/O is. If they joke about his height, next thing they know, they’ll be on the ground under him with him smirking down at them.

      And then he’ll kiss them as revenge.

     His kisses are often quick pecs, but once he can get a break and slow down, they’re long, soft, and loving.

      If his S/O is ever stressed or overwhelmed, he’ll sit them down on the couch and just hold them.

     Once he gets them to open up about whatever they’re feeling, he’ll just rub their back and listen. Once they’re done, he’ll encourage them and try to offer solutions.

     Late night rides on his motorcycle can be the perfect stress reliever. He’ll zoom and jump to see if he can get his S/O to laugh to squeak. Bonus points if they grip his waist.

      He rarely smokes once he’s in a relationship. He prefers spending time with his lover to calm him down.

     He can be a bit hot-headed during an argument, but if he goes too far, he stops immediately. Even if he still thinks he’s right, they’re more important. He’ll revisit the topic later once both sides are calmer.

   He loves dancing with his S/O under the stars. He’ll activate his ability and hold his lover close as they dance among the stars.

Fyodor Dostoevsky:

   Falling in love wasn’t exactly something Fyodor had planned on ever doing.

    Even once he enters a relationship, that’s not exactly how he sees it. He was simply intrigued and wanted them, so he went after what he wanted.

     He’s not exactly an honest boyfriend, but he tries not to outright lie to his S/O. That doesn’t mean he won’t, he just usually tries to change the topic or twist the truth.

     He doesn’t really try to hide who he is from his S/O, but he won’t give them much say in what he does anyway.

     He keeps a few tabs on his S/O, but other than that, he lets them do as they please. As long as he gets to be around them and know what they’re doing.

    He won’t ask them to get involved in his work, but if they show interest, he’ll give them mini missions to take care of.

    He enjoys playing games with his lover, especially cards.  He’s always amused at how determined they are to win, only to be utterly defeated. On occasion, he’ll let them win just to see their eyes shine as they gloat about their “victory”

     If he’s in a bad mood, he’ll tend to push his lover away. Although, he won’t stop them if they hug him or want to spend time with him. Because he actually appreciates it

      He’ll pretend that he forgot his S/O’s birthday. He keeps a completely straight face as he sees them look over at him repeatedly out of the corner of his eye. He eventually pulls some clever trick to reveal a present, and soaks in the way his lover goes from gloom to delight over something he sees as a trivial thing.

      But he loves them, and that’s not trivial to him. Although he rarely says it right out.

      He rarely kisses his lover, but it’s all made up for when he does. Because it’s the only time he really shows any kind of vulnerability, and they’re so genuine it’s more telling of his love than any words could convey.  

     Fyodor may not actually say “I love you” until he and his lover have been together for a long time, but if his S/O really listens, the message gets through.

Tetchō Suehiro:

   Tetcho is a bit odd so there may be a few bumps here and there when it comes to a relationship at first.

   Early on, he doesn’t really treat his S/O much different than he treats anyone else.

   He’s takes his job seriously and can seem cold and distant due to his generally stoic nature.

   But a bit of communication can do wonders.

  Once he gets a firm grasp the concept of “dating”, he’ll grow to be more affectionate.

   PDA doesn’t really bother him, and as long as his S/O has no complaints, he’ll be as affectionate as he wants in public.

    He likes to hold his lover’s hand and keep them close to him.

  He’ll often stop and just study his S/O

   How they walk or smile, the little tells they have, any nervous habits, Tetcho could just sit and watch them for hours. He’s not trying to be creepy, he just loves everything about them.

   The first time he kisses his S/O is sudden and casual.

He thinks they look so adorable and feels so grateful that they’re with him, so he leans over and kisses them gently.

   His S/O may be shocked, but he just continues on as if nothing happened.

   He’s very blunt and straight forward, so he doesn’t lie to his S/O.

It can be strange how he speaks his mind without hesitation. But if he thinks his S/O looks good in something, or if he randomly remembers how much he loves them, he’ll say it right then with no context.

   He takes things very seriously, so sometimes his S/O will have to be careful what they wish for. He does listen though, so if they’re just honest with him and try to get things across, he’ll get it.

   If they’re talking, he’s listening.

Although he may stop to train or exercise, he’s still listening.

   Speaking of exercise, he will in fact, use his S/O as a lifting weight. So long as they aren’t freaked out by it.

If his lover is lounging somewhere, he’ll just pick them up.

   He’s always touched by how his S/O worries about him every month when his surgery comes around.

   But he assures them its fine and will always let them know when it’s over so they can relax.

   He may try to convince his lover to eat similar-colored foods, but if they don’t want to he doesn’t mind.

   He’ll try not to gross them out with his food, but he still likes his food how he likes it.

[bennymillerthots]

I sent that anon this morning and let me say you did NOT disappoint!! Thank you for indulging me and my desperate need for Benny Miller content

For those just tuning in, here’s the original ask about Benny being with a big girl, including my addition about him shutting down a bodyshamer. Now for the extended look into him and his girl being insecure about her body.

First things first, health is more than just a number on a scale and MMA fighter Benny is well aware of this. I’m picturing a scenario where he accidentally overhears you make a comment on a girl’s night zoom call and ADHD brain kicks in. When you wrap up your call you find him at his computer and he tells you it's “something for his training program”. What really happens, is that when you make a self-deprecating comment later that week/the next week Ben is prepared - he was up that entire night making this spreadsheet.

If the two of you are in a group he will wait until later, but if/when you are alone he very seriously asks “what specifically you do not like and how is it impacting your goals”. You think the number on the scale is too high? Benny’s going to make you dig deeper into it (maybe right then, maybe it’s a conversation you agree to revisit after thinking by yourself) beyond just “society says this is the ideal”. If you want to change something he will support you - but he is going to ensure the focus is on the health impact, not the number on the scale.

You decide you want to feel stronger/more empowered in your body? Or improve your blood pressure/heart rate/cardiovascular health? Ben’s volunteering to build you a workout plan or help you find a trainer that you vibe with, AND he makes sure you visit your doctor to understand where you are at currently and what the ideal goal would be. You may be surprised to find you are closer than you thought, before you even begin the new regimen.

Not feeling *glamorous* during your special time with Benny? Congrats, you are presented with the tab in the google spreadsheet of different activities that increase flexibility, coordination, etc. and social media accounts of big girls within the respective community. Ben’s already a fan of yoga (I saw this HC’d somewhere, if someone sends it I’ll link it) and after looking through a few insta pages, you find yourself joining him and William at yoga. Personally I think the boys would prefer the Bikram practice due to its structure and intensity (yes I know the founder is terrible, find you a studio like mine that has tried to cut those ties).

Moral of the story is Benny’s going to say he loves you as you are, and if you want to do something for your body it should be focused on making it serve you better. He’s quick to quote or send this tiktok to anybody who tries to talk shit. Subsequently you see this tiktok and recruit William to teach it to you. The next time Benny’s tipsy/drunk you put your new skill to use and he’s screaming “THAT’S MY GIRL” from your shoulders.

[rwby-redux]

Deconstruction

Worldbuilding: Semblances II

Last time in Part I, we analyzed the failings of Semblances from a meta perspective. Now we’re going to look at them within the context of the actual show. Before we begin, let’s revisit that list of basic traits that are universally shared by Semblances.

A Semblance draws upon Aura as its source of power. When this fuel is depleted, a person can no longer use their Semblance, and must wait for their Aura to regenerate before it can be used again.

The specific ability or nature of one’s Semblance is alleged to be an expression of the user’s personality/character/soul.

Overuse of a Semblance can adversely affect a person and cause physical side effects, such as fatigue, headaches, or fainting.

Semblances can interact with Dust in such a way that their skills are augmented, resulting in the temporary acquisition of new subskills or secondary characteristics.

Through training and regular usage, Semblances can gradually become stronger or more advanced.

The intensity of certain emotions, such as stress, panic, despair, or rage, can cause a person to subconsciously activate their Semblance.

This refresher will be important as we go more in-depth. At the very least, it’ll save you the hassle of having to jump back and forth between tabs.

Limitations of Semblances

Recall point one. If your first instinct is to say, surely having a limited amount of Aura is a good limitation for Semblances, then you’d be forgiven for thinking that. In theory, it makes sense: a power based on a finite energy source does seem like a pretty significant drawback. My main issue with this being a credible limitation for Semblances is that we, the audience, have no way to gauge Aura depletion over time. And by extension, neither do our characters. In the first three Volumes, students used specialized monitors (usually on their scrolls) to keep tabs on Aura over the course of a sparring match. Not only do I like this because it’s a clever visual aid for relaying information to the audience, but also because it conveys clear worldbuilding information: characters don’t seem to have a way of innately sensing when their Aura is low. This idea seems to be reinforced again in V7.E3 - “Ace Operatives.” In the opening scene, Clover reminds RWBY and JN_R that their scrolls have been upgraded with Atlas tech, and they shouldn’t forget to use them. That line of dialogue is accompanied by Blake consulting her scroll for her teammates’ Aura levels. To my knowledge, there’s nothing in the canon that suggests characters can sense or feel when their Aura level drops, or how far away it is from depletion.

Having to rely on scrolls to monitor their Aura would be an excellent limitation to impose on an otherwise limitless superpower. Not only would it require the characters to constantly monitor their Aura, but it could introduce realistic problems. Like what would happen if a character’s scroll was lost, or destroyed, or its batteries died? How would that affect the character’s behavior in regards to Aura-related tasks? Great idea, right?

Now here comes the kicker: we don’t see any evidence of this in the show. When Team RNJR was traveling through Anima, none of them discussed having to find a village to recharge their scrolls. It’s not as if the trees have outlets that they can conveniently plug their scrolls into. Similarly, none of the characters from Volume 3 onward consult their scroll during fights to see where their Aura levels are at. You don’t see characters changing fighting styles midway through a fight in order to conserve what little Aura they have left. You don’t see characters minimizing the use of their Semblance in favor of more efficient tactics.

That’s why limited Aura doesn’t seem like a believable limitation for Semblances—not for a lack of possibility, but for a lack of execution. If characters made more of a fuss about it on-screen, I could buy it. But apart from one or two throw-away lines, characters don’t seem to pay attention to how Aura depletion affects Semblance usage, and by extension, they don’t adjust or change their tactics during combat to compensate for it.

Bear in mind that this discussion has only touched upon general limitations. We haven’t even addressed Semblance-specific limitations yet. Can Marcus Black only steal one Semblance at a time? Can Sun only make a certain number of clones at once? If Yang doesn’t eventually release the energy that she’s stored up, does it backfire on her? Is Pyrrha limited to only one type of magnetism, like ferromagnetism, or can she use more than one type? If Robyn uses her Semblance on someone who’s stating an incorrect fact, but they believe that fact to be true, then does it indicate that the person is lying? Does Hazel’s Semblance allow him to bypass/negate his Aura’s healing factor in order to stab Dust into his body?

And on and on it goes. A combination of vague or poorly-established mechanics for Semblances, coupled with the wide variety of Semblances, makes it impossible to predict what could be a hindrance for our characters down the road. This in turn creates a lack of stakes—how can we, the audience, be invested in the dangers that the cast faces, when we don’t know if those dangers are credible in the first place?

Active versus Passive Semblances

Usually when a character reveals information, it’s meant to answer questions, not create more of them. Such was the case when Qrow revealed his Semblance to Team RNJR for the first time—he brings misfortune, or rather, causes people (and objects in the nearby vicinity) to be blighted by bad luck via the manipulation of probability. Qrow is our introduction to passive Semblances, a term which, if I’m being honest, I’m not even entirely sure is canon. Someone’ll need to correct me on that, but for now “passive Semblance” will do. Because we have precious little information on the topic, I’m going to be relying on direct quotes.

Qrow: My Semblance isn't like most—it's not exactly something I do. It's always there, whether I like it or not. I bring misfortune. [1]

This passage tells us two different things: (1) passive Semblances are always active, and (2) passive Semblances can’t be controlled.

You can already see the problems with introducing a new concept this late in the game, because this new information clashes with what (few) previously-established rules we already have: Do passive Semblances require Aura? If Qrow’s Aura is depleted, will his Semblance continue to run, or will it become unusable like everyone else’s?

This ambiguity becomes even more frustrating when we acquire more information a little over a year later:

“It's not necessarily constantly running, it's more that it randomly spikes to cause unfortunate situations. If he chooses to amplify it in a fight, then yes, it does cost him.” [2]

Now we’re being told that that his Semblance isn’t “always there,” that Qrow can control it to an extent, and that his Semblance only depletes his Aura when he chooses to amplify it. Here we have an example of the character in the show being directly contradicted by one of the show’s creators. This implies that either they didn’t do a good enough job explaining passive Semblances the first time around, or they changed things after the episode aired. It isn’t just a he said/she said issue, either—Semblances requiring Aura is one of RWBY’s core mechanics for its pseudo-magic system, and by having a character whose Semblance breaks that cardinal rule, it makes the writing more difficult to believe or trust in terms of what’s canon versus what’s a retcon; what’s a subplot versus what’s a plothole. It doesn’t help when we get even more contradictory information from later episodes:

Qrow: I wouldn’t thank me. My Semblance brings misfortune. Sometimes I can’t keep it under control. [3]

I’m sorry, I thought we just established that Qrow can only amplify his Semblance. Now you’re telling us that he can partially suppress it too? Either he can’t control it at all, he can amplify it, or he can sometimes suppress its effects. Make up your damn mind.

The effects of his Semblance can be as minor as a coffee spill or as dire as a collapsing building… [4]

No! Stop it! Knocking over a Starbucks latte is not the same thing as demolishing a fucking building.

How is Qrow’s Semblance able to do something as insanely energy-demanding as toppling infrastructure without expending any Aura? How does his Semblance locate or prioritize variables in the environment to exploit/sabotage? Like, if there’s a mouse hanging out near some sort of Dust-powered generator in the building, does his Semblance send out subliminal messaging that convinces the mouse to chew through an electrical wire and cause the generator to explode?

Look, I refuse to believe that spilling a cup of coffee is somehow equal to setting off a stick of TNT or taking a wrecking ball to the side of a skyscraper. It doesn’t make any sense, which means that you have to provide a proper explanation for how it works. Because otherwise you’re going to be left with an audience that assumes Qrow’s Semblance is powered by (a) plot convenience, or (b) rats.

This—all of this, right here—is my issue with passive Semblances. (And don’t even get me started on Clover’s.)

Semblance Discovery, Auratic Plasticity

Did you notice the fancy scientific-sounding term in the heading?

Ooh. Auratic plasticity. That sounds official. You’re probably wondering where that term came from. A scene from Volume 5 you haven’t re-watched in a while (not that I can blame you). A World of Remnant episode, perhaps? Maybe it’s from one of the comics, or the director’s commentary on a DVD, or even an AMA on Reddit?

To answer your question: it didn’t come from any of those. Auratic plasticity is a term I coined exclusively for the Redux. Specifically, for talking about what goes behind discovering a person’s Semblance, and what factors are at play when that Semblance takes on its unique form.

Before we can talk about Auratic plasticity, however, we need to talk about all the ways someone discovers their Semblance. It can vary wildly from person to person. For some, their Semblance unlocks randomly while doing everyday run-of-the-mill things. As alluded to by Taiyang in V4.E9 - “Two Steps Forward, Two Steps Back,” Yang’s Semblance activated while she was getting a haircut. For others, it can be the byproduct of training, extreme stress, or an otherwise fatal encounter. [5] In rare instances, Semblances can be hereditary, thus removing any ambiguity of what that person’s Semblance will be when it first activates.

The reason why I bring any of this up is because RWBY’s official stance is that Semblances “generally reflect the wielder’s personality.” [6] If Semblances were generally tied to the personality of the wielder, then it would fail to account for the correlation between the circumstance that triggered the Semblance to manifest, and the resulting Semblance expression.

Let me give you a few examples.

Adaptive Semblance: Nora’s Semblance was unlocked when she was struck by lightning. Consider the fact that her Semblance allows her to absorb electricity without taking any damage from the electric current. Rather than her Semblance being tied to her personality, Nora’s is likely a case of an adaptive Semblance—as in, her circumstances required a very specific Semblance in order to survive the 10,000 amperes running through her body. Instead of her soul generating a Semblance tied to her personality, it prioritized generating a Semblance that would help her survive an immediate and life-threatening scenario.

Innate Semblance: Ruby’s Semblance was discovered one day while training. If we’re to assume that there weren’t any dangerous circumstances factoring into that training session, it’s likely that her soul generated a Semblance that was in fact tied to an aspect of her personality. In this case, her superspeed is a projection of her enthusiasm and hyperactive zeal, and her tendency to prioritize others’ wellbeing over her own, trying to figuratively (and in this case, literally) reach them before they’re harmed.

Hereditary Semblance: Weiss and Winter, and (presumably) Whitley, Willow, and Nicholas all share the glyph-based Semblance unique to the Schnee lineage. The confirmation of their Semblance being explicitly hereditary contradicts the idea that Semblances are an expression of one’s personality. If we go by that logic, it implies that—what, their personalities are all the same? They have no individuality? I’m sorry, but that’s just dumb.

This is why Semblance discovery is important, and why the canon should have paid more attention to developing it. There’s pretty compelling evidence for a person’s Semblance being tied to multiple factors apart from their “personality.” I know that I’m digressing here a bit, but the main reason why I bring up this correlation isn’t just because it clarifies inconsistencies with the canon. It also presents an opportunity to enrich the lore of the show.

In the Redux, Auratic plasticity is the ability of the soul to generate a Semblance based on either an immutable personality trait (innate), a scenario-specific survival method (adaptive), or a “genetic” trait that’s repeatedly selected for due to its inherent fitness (inherited). These three categories are determined by a value called hierarchical prioritization—basically, it’s the soul’s ability to decide what Semblance-trigger gets precedence. I’ll get into more detail when I start the Amendment, but it felt important to clarify my intentions early, so I could justify writing 700 words on why Semblance discovery is important.

Adverse Effects of Using Semblances

Unlike Limitations, which focuses on what a Semblance can or can’t do, Adverse Effects deals with the negative repercussions/consequences of using a Semblance.

Or in RWBY’s case, a lack thereof.

(For the moment, let’s set aside the magic/not magic discourse and acknowledge that yes, in the traditional sense, Aura, Semblances, and Dust are part of RWBY’s magic system, the same way bending is part of A:TLA’s.)

When designing a magic system, you’ve got to balance it. Otherwise, the system contains powers that are vaguely-defined, OP, and bereft of any costs.

One way to implement a system of checks and balances is by giving that system a cost for using it. In RWBY’s case, the only “cost” experienced by characters is physical fatigue whenever they overextend themselves. But in the grand scheme of things it’s not really a detrimental consequence, in part because of how infrequently exhaustion is viewed as a legitimate threat. Seriously. When was the last time you saw the main cast fail because they overdid it while using their Semblances? It just doesn’t happen.

One way you could implement a cost is by tying Semblance usage to a physical demand. According an article by Julia Belluz, Winter Olympic athletes consume anywhere between 1,300 - 2,500 and 4,000 - 7,000 calories on average per day.

It wouldn’t be that much of a stretch to apply this to RWBY. Given the high-intensity acrobatics the characters perform on the regular, it would make sense that strenuous physical activity, coupled with Semblance usage, would create costs in the form of caloric needs. Maybe that’s an issue Team RNJR needs to deal with while backpacking across Anima. Is food a top priority for them? Do they have to restrict Semblance usage when running low on rations? Does the group ever have to hunt or forage for food to meet the energy demands of fighting Grimm?

Not only does this balance out Semblances, but it opens the door for potential worldbuilding. Is “Huntsman” ever used as a euphemism for “glutton”? Do all-you-can-eat buffets ban Huntsmen from their establishments? Do Huntsmen have a reputation for being less picky about food options? In places that use trade-and-barter systems, are Huntsmen willing to accept food as payment instead of lien?

I think that’s more or less everything I wanted to say about Semblances. I have a few unrelated nitpicks, but I can save those for another time. This post is already longer than I intended it to be.

-

[1] Volume 4, Episode 8: “A Much Needed Talk.”

[2] Shawcross, Kerry. “CRWBY AMA.” Reddit interview. February 12, 2018. [https://www.reddit.com/r/RWBY/comments/7x3w4s/crwby_ama_w_miles_luna_kerry_shawcross_and_paula/du5bpdm/?context=3]

[3] Volume 7, Episode 3: “Ace Operatives.”

[4] Wallace, Daniel. The World of RWBY: The Official Companion. VIZ Media LLC, 2019, page 94.

[5] Volume 5, Episode 4: “Lighting the Fire.”

[6] Wallace, Daniel. The World of RWBY: The Official Companion. VIZ Media LLC, 2019, page 39.

[organizedlikeus-blog]

51 Great Ways to Be a Successful Parent When You Have a Demanding Career

What’s the use of success if you do not have time to enjoy it with the people who matter to you the most?

Does it really matter?

You are too busy at work that you rarely find time to be with your family at home. Does that make you a bad parent? Maybe not, but close.

Creating a balance between being a parent, having a successful career and a thriving social life is a very delicate affair among many millennials. One of the factors usually takes precedence. Sadly, career always seems to be the winner.

And it is totally understandable- one has to put food on the table and enjoy the beautiful little things life has to offer.

But what happens when you still want to raise a healthy and happy family while still advancing in your career?

The further you advance career-wise, the less time you have to spend at home or with your children and beloved ones. Those in business have it a little bit easier because they can be able to schedule time to be with their families easily.

But picture this: You have a good, solid education, started your career from the bottom and now things have panned out for you. You earn a good income, you have lovely children and you have a supportive spouse. What are you lacking?

If your spouse stays at home to take care of your children, you may have had it easier than most, but you still need to do your bit on connecting with your children.

What’s the use of success if you do not have time to enjoy it with the people who matter to you the most?

It’s hard juggling career and parenthood for the millennial. You want to enjoy the best of both worlds. You want to witness your baby taking the first baby steps, growing a tooth, calling you mama, or papa, learning how to speak and such sweet little matters. You want to do all this and still try to keep yourself organized at home.

“The period between 18 months and 3 years is a critical period in the growth and development of a child and parents should be present, If possible, to create that lasting bond with their kids.”- Dr. Sears

You want to be there for your teenage daughter or son, to guide them through the treacherous adolescent and teenage years. You want to see them grow into responsible citizens by having a hands-on approach.

How do you do that without losing the chance to keep bringing the bacon home?

No worries, we have curated a list of proposed activities and action points you can undertake to ensure that as a parent, you do not lose the connection with your children and still be able to grow in your career so that you can have a well-balanced, all- rounded and fulfilled life.

50 + 1 great ways on how to be a successful parent despite having a hectic career

Get involved in your children’s activities

It doesn’t matter whether it is a 2 minutes, 5 minutes or 30 minutes’ affair. Whenever you get the chance, get involved in what your kids are doing. It could be a silly game of legos, building blocks, a simple game of ‘catch’, coloring or whatever they fancy- be there. Engage them, encourage them and try to have fun while doing it. It may seem silly to you (of course it is) but it means the world to them.

Share meals with your family

Whenever possible, be present to share a meal with your family. This could form a perfect bonding moment where you take the opportunity to learn stuff about them. Have a family meal routine. For instance, you can teach your kids to conduct a thanks giving prayer before meals. This creates some sense of purpose and responsibility in them.

Send postcards whenever you are out of state or country

I know technology is the easiest way to reach out to connect with your kids at this age, and we shall get to that. However, nothing beats an old-school fashioned way such as sending a postcard whenever you are out of the state or country. 20 years later, they might not remember the calls you made, but they will relish the postcards you sent to them.

Text and use video calls whenever possible

For kids who are able to comprehend SMS, it would be a good way to communicate. You will be surprised at the rate which teenagers text. It makes them feel that you have some sense of connection with them and their world. However, do not try to be funny, or learn their lingo on text as that may backfire really bad. It is practically impossible to keep up with all the ever-changing slang, abbreviations, emoji and whatnot. You can also FaceTime or skype when you are away from them as this gives some semblance of real connection. Do not befriend them on Facebook, but if you wish to ignore this, do so at your own risk.

Plan special times and moments

Special times and moments mean different things to different people. Find something unique that you could share with your child and have fun at it.

Include your kids in your daily schedule

As you make plans on how you will conquer the world that day, be sure to include your kids in your schedule. You might not get the chance to see them but something might come up and you may find some free time. Use that time to connect with them in some way.

Grab a snack together

Now and then, find some few minutes to escape from your workplace and grab a bite with your son or daughter. Just makes sure this does not happen too often- unless the snacks are organic 

Bring your kid to the workplace

Some workplaces are so cool in that they allow their employees to take their kids to the workplace. If your company allows this, take them there. Let them know what you do, and in some situations, how you do it. Introduce them to some of your colleagues. They might get intrigued.

Drop and pick them from school

You can schedule your mornings in such a way that you are able to drop your kids to school in the morning yourself, and maybe pick them from school later in the evening.  Do not leave this role to a nanny if you can help it. This stamps your presence and role in life and you can be able to have a chat during the drive.

Go shopping with them

Next time you visit a mall, allow your kids to do some supervised shopping. Give them a list, push the tray and let them pick the products as you stroll alongside. This gives them some sense of responsibility and great pride in knowing you trust them enough to pick groceries for the homestead.

Be present on birthdays and other important occasions in their lives

You can’t miss their birthday. Enough said there.

In school, try to attend their soccer practice, their drama presentations, auditions and whatnot. The support goes a long way in building their confidence.

If you happen to miss their birthday for some reason, make it up to them soon.

Say ‘I love you’ consistently and mean it

They will love you right back. Maybe.

Say “I am sorry” and mean it

Sometimes you need to say sorry to your kids if you make a mistake. Learn how to do that and mean it. This will help them learn to own up to their own mistakes in the future.

Let them fail now and then

Do not spoil or pamper your kids too much. Let them learn by themselves sometimes. If they fail at something, revisit that thing and point out the mistakes made. Then let them try again. They will learn to be strong and independent.

Engage them in debates and intelligent conversations

Every now and then, engage them in intelligent debates. Let them know that you respect their opinion even if the topic is beyond their scope or realm of comprehension. You can ask them a question like;

“Billy, what do you think Trump should do about South Korea threatening to bomb us?”

You might get some very interesting responses and if they have no idea what you are talking about, school them. They will think you are a hero.

Take them on a road trip & play games at home

You do not have to transverse the whole country for that. Just drive for a few hours around slowly and enjoy their chatter as you explain to them facts about places you go like a tour guide. Play with them some games in the backyard.

Be their role model

Your kids look up to you for guidance on practically all matters. Do not disappoint them. Try to guide them in the right way and you will be their role models. If you cannot fit into the role model picture, be content with being their parent. However, do not let them think you are perfect. Just let them think you are a kick-ass dad or mom!

Buy them gifts and congratulate them when they do something good

Let the kids learn that good work is rewarded by giving them reasonable gifts when they do something good. For instance, when they get that A in school, take them to see a special movie, or buy them that video game they have been yearning for months.

Do not spoil your kids with gifts to compensate for your absence

We just said its a good idea to buy your kids gifts. However, do not spoil them. This is a form of bribe that will not work out well in the end. They will come to associate you with material things and when you do not give them what they want, they might turn into spoiled brats. Just apologize to them and explain to them why you could not be with them at some point.

Keep your updated on their progress in school

There is no point in paying for your kids’ tuition in an expensive school if you are not able to monitor if they are getting value for your money. Keep tabs on their performance, both academically and socially. You can call the school now and then to spy on what the kids are going.

Do not be harsh in punishment

Learn how to punish your kids according to the mistake committed. Do not be too harsh and do not be too easy on them. If you are too harsh, they will form a wall of fear around them and isolate you from their world. If you are too easy, it may encourage them to keep making stupid mistakes. Even kids conduct a simple cost-benefit analysis. If they feel that the punishment will not be as harsh, they will be tempted to commit the mistake deliberately as they stand to gain more.

Teach them about money

One thing I wish my dad taught me when I was young was money. This is an important topic that will shape their financial well-being in the future. Teach your kids how to save what you give them as pocket money. Then later, teach them how to invest the little they save and how to enjoy profits. They should learn that money doesn’t grow on trees.

Bring them up to be responsible citizens

Do not bring up mean children. Teach them how to be responsible. It all starts in the house. Let them clear the table after a meal, let them make their beds, arrange their toys and such activities. Occasionally, engage in charitable events in the society with them.

Learn how to detect changes in your child’s behavior

Children’s behavior changes constantly depending on many factors. Most changes are natural, related to their growth patterns. However, abrupt changes in behavior need to be noted. For instance, children being moody all of a sudden, throwing things around, talking trash and such weird behavior. The changes could be hiding something big, maybe something happening in school or the neighborhood. Detect these behaviors and address them before they escalate into something ugly.

RELATED: What to do when your kids become rebellious and how to change that effectively

Love your children unconditionally

Enough said.

Praise your kids in public but reprimand them privately

Do not scorn your kids in public, particularly in front of their peers. It lowers their self-esteem. When they excel in something or do something good, praise them publicly.

Do not compare your kids with others

Your neighbor’s kids may seem perfect, better mannered, better composed and destined for greater success than your kids. Do not be a fool to make the mistake of comparing your kids with others. Each child is unique in their own right. This is what makes the world a beautiful place. Each parent brings their kids up in their own style. Encourage your kids to be the best they can be, in their own capacity and not under the society’s expectations.

Let your kids see you as their safe haven

Protect your kids. Let them know you got their back at all times. They will appreciate you for that and be able to venture out of their comfort zones in pursuit of excellence.

Teach by example

You want your kids to take the trash out habitually? Start by doing it yourself. You want your kids to read a book at home, start by reading a book yourself. The point is, do not impose rules on them. Let them see you do what you want them to do and they will gladly follow your guideline.

Help them improve their social status

Encourage your kids to be social with their peers. Let them visit their neighbors now and then and let the neighbor’s kids come to your house to visit. Some of the longest and most fulfilling relationships and friendships in the world were formed during this stage.

Provide for them.

Food. Clothing. Shelter. Remember those basic needs?

Identify, nurture and support their talent

If Justin Bieber’s parents did not support him and his talent, he probably would never have become the sensation he grew to be. Kids have different talents. They cannot all be famous movie or music stars. Some could be the next Picasso or the next president. Learn to identify these talents and support them as they try to explore them.

Do not raise your child to seek approval of the society

This point has been touched a bit here. As a parent and a human being, learn to live your own life, by your own rules, not those of the society. If you try to please everyone in the society, you will fail terribly. Teach your kids to also live by their own standards so that they can live a more fulfilling life. Of course, you have to find some balance and point of interest between you and the society but you get the point.

Show your kids how to get along with their siblings and family

Family could be rough and tough. Siblings are mean, annoying and selfish sometimes (most times actually). But that is what makes it a family. As a parent, it's your role to teach your kids to get along with each other. Teach them how to take care of each other, how to love each other and how to support one another. After all, they are not going to wake up and disappear into thin air someday. They are family.

Be their parent, before you become their friend

Do not struggle too much to be friends with your kids that you forget how to be their parent. Start by being a parent first, then work your way to friendship. If friendship doesn’t work in the end, you can fall back into the parent role.

Allow them to question your actions now and then

Let your kids ask you questions concerning some of your actions or stand on certain matters. Explain to them clearly why you did what you did or took the specific stand you took. They will learn how to reason and defend their actions.

Secure their future

You have the money and the resources to cushion your children and assure they have a great future. It’s the role of the parent to educate their kids. If you can afford it, set up a trust, or an education policy for them. They will be able to live life without doubts and reach their full potential.

Take care of their health matters

Get a health insurance policy for your kids. It will also make you rest easy with the knowledge that their health matters are well taken care of. Nothing disheartens a parent than the thought of having a sick kid and having no capacity to do anything.

Encourage them to express how they feel

Let the kids tell you about how they feel on a variety of matters. It is important to them when they know that you seek and value their opinion on different issues.

“The most important thing you can do is to make sure your child’s world is conducive to exploration”

– Craig T. Ramey, Ph.D., director of the Georgetown University Center on Health.

Take good care of yourself

How do you expect to take care of your kids when you cannot take care of yourself? Up your game, dress nicely, eat healthier, live a healthier life and you just might enjoy being a parent to your kids and friends to others.

Display affection to your partner in front of your children

It may seem gross to them but go right ahead, kiss your partner in front of them. This public display of affection offers them great assurance that all is well and there’s a lot of love to go around in the house.

Talk less, listen More

Let your kids do all the talking. Just do the listening and prompting, and act like their opinion and jibberish is all that matters to you in this world. It might not make sense to you, but it does to them.

Avoid using phones or electronics during dinner time

There’s this annoying habit of people eating whilst engrossed in their phones, ipads or newspapers. Make the dinner time a tech-free time. No receiving phone calls, no making calls, just a good old-fashioned family dinner where healthy conversations can be had before everyone gets back to tech world.

Develop a strict family culture

Have a culture that everyone has to observe. For instance, tech-free dinner times, strict times for sleeping, making beds when kids wake up, being polite to strangers, taking dirty dishes to the sink among others. Each kid will grow up with a sense of responsibility.

Read with them/for them

Find time to read with your kids before they sleep. Let them read out loud and correct them when they err. Do not be fast to correct frequently though. Let them know they are doing just great. Read to them books that interest them. Occasionally, sit with them as they watch cartoons on TV.

Monitor their online activities

It might seem intrusive to their privacy, but it’s worth it. There are all manners and sorts of abuse and bullying online these days. There is no need to let your children become victims of something you can control. Place limitations and filters on what they can watch online.

Be the boss in the homestead

Children need to look up to someone who has some semblance of authority. Be that person. Let them come to you when they have issues, grievances or concerns because they believe that you will resolve them perfectly and fairly. Be firm with your judgments and punishments but be fair as well.

Do not quarrel in front of your children

Parents quarrel all the time- we are human beings after all. However, try to avoid quarreling in front of your kids as this may have negative implications for their future.

Learn about what your kids love and surprise them now and them

Surprise your kids with stuff they love now and then. This brings them closer to you and keeps them in anticipation of the next surprise.

It’s Ok to fail sometimes

Do not be too hard on yourself. And do not beat yourself too much when things do not seem to go the way you expect with your kids. Fail, learn and try again.

+1

ACT NOW!

Now you know different ways to be relevant in the lives of your kids despite having a hectic career. The next step (and most important one) is to put these figments of wisdom into real action. Enjoy your career and enjoy being a great parent.

TODAY.

[majornelson]

October 2019 Xbox Update Delivers New Family Settings Features, Wish List Notifications, And More

October is here and we know many gamers are already spending quality time with their favorite horror games (we won’t judge if you turn the brightness up). But never fear, we’re here to share lots of new features and improvements with the October 2019 Xbox One Update, which begins rolling out to everyone today. This month’s update unveils new Family Settings options to balance your family’s screen time, Wish List notifications, improvements to the Mixer viewing experience on Xbox One, the ability to refer Xbox Game Pass titles to friends, and even more improvements based on your feedback. Read on for a breakdown on each new feature and update.

App and game limits for Family Settings

With the October 2019 Xbox Update, we’re taking additional steps to improve our existing family settings that work across Xbox One and Windows devices. We’re giving parents more control over what their children see and interact with on the devices in your home, which is part of our commitment to make gaming a fun, inclusive, and safe experience for everyone. For us, that means offering tools that provide choice so families can create the right balance of screen time in their lives.

*With the new app and game limits feature, we introduce two new key elements to screen time:Parents can now set how much time their children spend within specific apps or games in addition to the total time spent on a device. Parents have the added option to set limits at the app or game level, enabling you to be more specific with how your kids are spending their time with technology.

*The app and game limits you set will apply across Windows devices and Xbox One. We want to provide families the convenience of setting this up once, and letting it carry over across your child’s devices. This means one hour of a specific game or app per day is one hour of that game or app – no trying to sneak in extra screen time by switching from one device to another.

Check out today’s Family Settings announcement for a full overview.

Wish List notifications

We’re excited to see everyone enjoying the Wish List feature on the Microsoft Store! The October 2019 Xbox Update enhances this feature with notifications to alert you when an item in your Wish List has a price discount. The new Wish List notifications will make sure you never miss a great deal on games you want. Check out and update your current Wish List here.

Mixer viewing improvements

Mixer is integrating even further into the Xbox One experience with the October update. We’ve built a full Mixer viewing experience right into the dashboard with a focus on speed and simplicity. Viewers will no longer have to navigate to a separate app to enjoy Mixer streams, so getting to the content you want to watch has never been easier! Simply click the stream you’d like to watch to seamlessly start watching.

Recommend an Xbox Game Pass title

Games are more fun when shared with friends. Xbox Game Pass for Console has a curated library of over 100 high-quality games, so you may find a gem that you want to share with your friends. You can now recommend a game from Xbox Game Pass for Console directly to your friend via a message or to your whole community via your activity feed or share to a club. Your friends will be able to easily get to the page for the games you recommend and can start downloading right away if they are an Xbox Game Pass member.

Recent Players improvements

Thanks to your feedback, we’ve made significant improvements to the Recent Players experience, making the service more reliable and allowing you to connect with the gamers you play with instantly. We understand the popularity of this feature and know it can be especially helpful with large-scale multiplayer games. You can now more quickly and easily engage with your Recent Players, whether you are sending a message, inviting players to a party, or adding them to your Friends List.

Under-the-hood game update improvements

Players can jump into their favorite games even faster with the October update. We’ve added improvements to automatic game updates, significantly reducing when you encounter the “update required” screen when launching a title.

Events app

Later this month, you may notice the Events app installed on your console. With Events, we will be introducing new ways for gamers to discover and be reminded of events happening within your favorite Xbox games or gaming communities such as a start of a new season or in-game holiday events. We’ll have more to share soon about how we plan to evolve this feature, so stay tuned for future announcements.

More flexible Capture Settings and Capture & Share experiment

The “Allow game captures” setting now has multiple options, giving you more control over your game capture experience. Previously, game capture could either be enabled or disabled in Settings, with certain games automatically recording memorable moments when this feature was enabled. With the October update, you may now select between “Captures by me,” “Captures by me or games,” or “Don’t capture” settings, providing you more choice over how you build your highlight reel.

In addition to the above, some people may also see an experimental update we are making to improve the Capture & Share experience. For now, we’re rolling out an improved “Capture & Share” tab for a limited portion of the Xbox One audience to gauge interest and collect feedback. We’re eager to hear their feedback before we share more.

The renamed “Capture & Share” Guide tab aims to improve usability by elevating your three capture options, “Record what happened,” “Start recording,” and “Capture screenshot,” to the top of the screen as well as allowing you to quickly revisit your last capture. When you’re ready to share, the following “Share to” menu has also been updated to focus more on what you want to do with your content – quickly and easily share it with your friends, the world via Twitter or your Xbox Activity Feed, or save it in your collection for safekeeping.

These updates are possible because of the Xbox Insiders who have helped shape these features, so big thanks to all participants for their valuable input. If you’d like to help shape the future of Xbox and provide feedback on early features, download the Xbox Insider Hub app on your Xbox One or Windows 10 PC today. You can also visit the Xbox Insider Blog here for the latest release notes, or join the Xbox Insiders subreddit to submit feedback and join the discussion.

We’re always working to improve your gaming experience on Xbox One and will have more announcements in store before the year is done. Stay tuned for more information and enjoy the October update!

via Xbox Live's Major Nelson https://ift.tt/2ATuGvN

[erhiem]

Feather muthaland, Bibimutha’s songs play as if she is rebuilding her confidence in real time.

Photo Illustration by Renee Klahr, Aamna Ijaz/NPR; Courtesy of Muthaboard

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Photo Illustration by Renee Klahr, Aamna Ijaz/NPR; Courtesy of Muthaboard

Feather muthaland, Bibimutha’s songs play as if she is rebuilding her confidence in real time.

Photo Illustration by Renee Klahr, Aamna Ijaz/NPR; Courtesy of Muthaboard

NPR Music Turning the Tables A project envisioned to challenge sexist and exclusionary conversations about musical greatness. So far we’ve focused on reversing traditional, patriarchal best-of-lists and popular music history. But this time, it’s personal. For 2021, we’re digging into our own relationships to record the records we love, asking: How do we know as listeners when a piece of music is important to us? How can we break free from institutional pressures on our tastes in keeping with the lessons of history? What exactly does it mean to create a personal canon? Essays in this series will explore our unique relationship with our favorite albums, from unmatched classics by major stars to sub-cultural gamechangers and personal revelations. Because the way some music holds a central place in our lives is not just a reflection of how we develop our tastes, but of how we approach the world.

In April, two days after my partner got his second COVID-19 vaccination dose, a friend sent us an invitation to celebrate his birthday at a bar. “I’m not sure,” I said, citing CDC guidelines to wait at least two weeks before socializing. But I had another idea. While some dreamed of nail salon appointments as a return to normalcy, and others fled to Airbnbs on the outskirts, I suggested making a noise on the phone once again with the crew, three Geminis and Taurus.

Our first time together was in 2019, which we regarded as a rite of passage, playing Kendrick Lamar good kid, maed city (an epic, if not prestige update for the specific soundtrack) as our visions began to blur. More than anything, I noticed how the psychedelic influences calmed the ticking urgency I felt on a daily basis in order to make productive use of my time. That kind of urgency became too much to bear last year: With the world still in a pandemic holding pattern, I was also eyeing my 35th birthday in June, and I needed to answer questions from family incessantly. Didn’t feel closer – to where my career was headed, or whether I would have children, and if so – than it was ten years ago. Naturally, I didn’t tell this to my friend.

While I certainly yearned for pre-pandemic normalcy, or perhaps a time where my age was not nearly as consequential, I was also inspired by muthaland, Chattanooga, Tenn., the first album of 2020 by rapper Bibimutha. muthaland Helping me take myself out of this pressure to live up to everyone’s expectations. The album begins by promising a good time; In the opening skit, a game show contestant swallows an acid tab to enter Bibimutha’s world. This realm of her imagination ends up as a tangle of feelings and thoughts, where not a single factor – not her career or single motherhood – completely defines who she is.

I first heard about Bibimutha in 2016. Not long before artists like art rocker Björk embraced her. Even in this crowded music landscape, it’s hard to forget an artist who names their debut EP after an iconic makeup palette, or whose moniker dates back to their mid-20s as having two sets of twins. The latter is considered a badge of honor. Early singles like “Rules” and “Rose” were the talk of a smoky-eyed relationship that could make women completely in agreement (“I’m not going to waste my waist, my thighs, my time, and all my energy/effort. Can *** * which just not for me”). The ambitious concepts he had in mind for his debut album also looked promising. his first thought, prosperity gospel, as a result of her love-hate relationship with televangelist pastor Joel Osteen (“He can sell any f****** thing and you’ll just spend your money,” she once said). Later, she stated that she planned to call the album Christine; It would be inspired by a relative who killed men who either betrayed her or abused her.

Yet I didn’t really connect with Bibimutha until we were both at the peak of our frustrations with our careers. In July 2020, Atlanta’s NPR affiliate WABE dropped under the map, a Southern hip-hop podcast that I co-host, just as overall podcast listenership began to return to pre-pandemic levels. and until muthaland Arriving last August, BbyMutha was completely disillusioned with the music industry. “After this album I’m never doing it again,” she said. This rap retirement announcement ended prematurely, although at the time, listeners mourned the lost potential. In muthalandLong after that tab swallowed one of the most indulgent rap fantasies of all time, BbyMutha is a next-gen LA chat with wordplay inspired by Gucci Mane, a rare woman who navigates traps and orders sex from across the gender spectrum. But Bibimutha also emphasizes in “Holographic” that the journey is a “rave with roaches” swirling around her house. At the height of her musical talent, she could still find a place where she falls short.

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As the oldest of my cousins, I spent most of my life in Maryland oriented around achievement and success, setting a good example. After graduating during the 2008 recession, the older I’ve gotten, the harder it felt to be, shortly thereafter separated from my first and only 9-to-5 to pursue a culture journalism career. moved to Atlanta for what seemed frivolous or self-indulgent before this “Essential workers” became part of our lexicon. (“My mom actually ran away from the Vietnam War when she was 16, so I could see” My Block: Atlanta For work, I’m not a s***,” i once joked.) I attributed my lack of hustle to this fear of failure which only intensified over the years. and before muthaland, I looked for music that helped me wrestle with or push through those feelings. open mike eagle dark comedy Soundtracked my uncomfortable entry into the gig economy after college. I still turn to trap jeezy songs Let’s get on this: Thug Inspiration 101 Or DouBoys Cashout’s “started out as an activist” for a momentary boost.

In the spring of 2019, I learned that this persistently worrying and ensuing fatigue had a name: generalized anxiety disorder. (I’ve kept it a secret from my family; my uncle once said that Asians “take too much pride in going to therapy,” as statistics following the Atlanta-area spa shooting would show.) As I tracked my sleep and panic attacks in one notebook after another, I learned that perfectionism—my once default answer to job interviews—is, “What’s your biggest weakness?” – not really to be seen in a positive light at all. Still, my mother’s way of asking “How are you?” Keeps “Are you busy?” and “Are you making money?” And I still answer “yes” every time. It has taken me almost all the time in the past two years to accept that self-awareness is still a work in progress.

Last December, my therapist gave me an exercise regimen that I still use today. In a moment of crisis, I write down the first negative thought that comes to mind (“I always make the wrong decisions,” “My career is coming back,” “Christmas is ruined”). Then I write through a reality check, as if interviewing myself: Are all these ideas true? Or is there evidence that this situation is not as dire as I had feared?

I recognize this train of thought muthaland. Songs like “Roaches Don’t Die” become anthemic because when Bibimutha brags and boasts, it’s like “You don’t f*** with who’s who with who’s government stamp and wic, huh?” Like what happens between songs. When she looks in the mirror and longs for the confident woman she once was (“I miss that b**** sometimes”) she descends on a personal statement in the face of “heavy metal”. “They see the truth when they see me / They see they aunt and they mom and grandma, gee,” she raps. “They look in a mirror, it ain’t clear / I’m afraid of everything being b*****.” At the end of “Scam Likely”, Bibimutha mocks the pseudo-awakening, drag race-savvy listeners who insist on having her as a role model (“And she makes me feel so empowered that ****** is empowered – and i up“). I get her reasoning: Role models seem impenetrable. Bibimutha’s songs sound like she’s rebuilding her confidence in real time.

During my last visit, my therapist told me to work on my definition and measures of success. I still don’t have concrete answers that translate into neat life goals, though maybe that’s an answer in itself. muthaland Teaching me to lower expectations that may read as plausible but ultimately prove untenable. Its themes confirm how I felt after my first 2019 visit, which is that scientists should revisit the psychological properties of hallucinations, even after decades of government-imposed stigma. Bibimutha’s lyrics demonstrate that motherhood, as it would be, cannot replace a sense of self. Neither would career ambitions, for that matter: muthalandThe most obvious nod to any kind of rap pantheon is “outro (skit 5).” Game show hosts thanks “sponsors” Boosie, Webby, and Diamond and Princess from Crime Mob — and then in 19 seconds, it’s over. muthaland otherwise completely untouched by discussion about Rap’s Mount RushmoreHow sales and clout factor into greatness. In how its soul-searching slowly unfolds during its hour-long runtime, the album is teaching me that position is not everything, but timing is.

In the flurry of excessive social activity between getting vaccinated and preparing myself for the Delta version, here’s what I’ll remember most:

The post-vaccination journey that finally took place on a Sunday in May. By 6 p.m. the effect was gone, though my partner reading the tarot gave to our friend, the second Gemini, didn’t wrap up until close to midnight.

The first time I heard BbyMutha’s “GoGo Yubari,” a harsh indictment against her baby daddy and the nature of how she became a baby mama: “Another violent story, another self-esteem destroyed.” BbyMutha released it in June, one of several loose and unreleased EPs from this year. muthaland. (Thank god she didn’t actually retire.)

Finally, a passing comment from a friend ahead of her 35th birthday this month. The keyword was “milestone”, with this weighted expectation we had already achieved, suggesting that all this was not enough. “I’m always here to talk about it,” I said, and I meant it. After the past year of working as a stand-in confidant of BbyMutha, I feel ashamed personally, or a shame at all.

christina lee is a music and culture writer living in Atlanta. She co-hosts the podcast under the map.

The post BbyMutha’s ‘Muthaland’ Is Teaching Me That Status Isn’t Everything : NPR appeared first on Spicy Celebrity News.

[sualkmedeiors]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/modernb2bmarketing/~3/lz1SSBWRvGY/7-social-media-tips-for-small-business-success.html

[darkammarketing]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from http://bit.ly/2F5QWGN via IFTTT via Blogger http://bit.ly/2sjj40Z

[archiebwoollard]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8217493 https://blog.marketo.com/2019/01/7-social-media-tips-for-small-business-success.html

[maxslogic25]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8217493 https://blog.marketo.com/2019/01/7-social-media-tips-for-small-business-success.html

[zacdhaenkeau]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8217493 https://blog.marketo.com/2019/01/7-social-media-tips-for-small-business-success.html

[racheltgibsau]

7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success

The biggest failures small businesses encounter in social media come from not knowing who their customers are, who they’re competing against, which channels to target, and how to engage their audience. Most are unaware of native analytics available in all major social networks and don’t know how to integrate their online and offline marketing activities or how to automate their social scheduling.

In this blog, I will show you seven important social media marketing tips that every small business should know before embarking on its social media journey.

Tip #1: Know Your Competition

Remember that having competitors who target the same people is great because you can always check what worked for them and what didn’t, and use this knowledge to adjust your own strategy.

My advice is to start with the big fish. These guys are doing something right to get the kind of follower count and engagement they have, so why not learn from them? There are a few ways of doing this.

Use Facebook’s Pages to identify your best-performing competitors and compare their activity, engagement, and audience growth to your own. You can see exactly what content they’re posting, how often, and at what time of day they’re posting. Remember to not only look at follower count but total engagement: it will tell you how their followers are interacting with the content. Brands with high engagement rates are typically the ones to watch.

Not entirely sure who your competitors are? That’s ok. There are tools out there that can help you find the competitors you might not have been aware of. For example, with SEMrush’s Competitive Positioning Map all you need to do is to enter your URL, and the tool will automatically compile data showing you your top competitors, how much traffic they’re getting and the keywords they’re ranking for:

Pay special attention to the bubbles located above you and to your right. They represent the competitors whose total traffic exceeds yours and who are ranking for more keywords than you are.

This report will give you a good idea of who has a strong online presence, and who is investing heavily in marketing. Brands investing in marketing and getting plenty of traffic typically have strong social presences, so they’ll be good ones to check out.

If you need more advanced social media competitive analytics, tools like Rival IQ, SproutSocial, Klear, or SEMrush can provide them. They will help you track your competitors’ social pages to see how their posts perform, how much engagement they receive, which hashtags they use, and what special offers and competitions they’re running on social.

Note: Never skip the competitive analysis part if you’re just starting out.  Your competition has tried-and-tested recipes of what works and what doesn’t. Use them to your advantage.

Tip #2: Pick the Right Channel to Target

There are a lot of social media channels out there, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be on all of them.

If you are starting your social media journey from scratch, it’s advisable that you pull together a survey and ask your customers which social media channels they prefer or use the most.

If you’re already active on social media channels, check their efficiency. Compare the size of your audience across different channels, your engagement, and engagement rate metrics. For example, the overview report in Social Media Tracker shown below will give you an idea of which channels are worth putting effort into:

Another way to pick the right target channel is to analyze your competitors’ activity. Check which channels they put their energies into, and start targeting them too: your chances of getting noticed by the relevant audience will double.

Bonus Tip: Be ruthless in getting rid of some of your accounts and prioritize your social media marketing capabilities. Not ready to make videos? Skip YouTube. Don’t have time for blog writing? Leave it for now and concentrate on one or two channels. 

Tip #3: Simplify Content Creation

Creating social media content does take time, but not as much when you have the right tools at hand.

For example, Inoreader will help you find relevant content and keep up with your favorite information sources. The tool allows you to save web pages for viewing later, and subscribe to social feeds (even with the free version you can subscribe to as many sources as you like).

Photos and videos you take on your phone can be easily processed with tools like Canvas and VSCO right from your mobile device. Tools like Buffer, Sprout Social, or SEMrush Poster will help you with scheduling and posting your content across different social networks.

Social media managers are always at risk of making small errors, and social media can be merciless if you make a mistake. Use tools like Grammarly to keep your brand’s reputation intact.

To find hashtags, use RiteTag—it is an absolute must-have for any social media manager. The tool gives you tag suggestions for images or text on any site or social network. All it takes is a right click on the image or text.

Key Takeaway: have you ever heard about the 80/20 rule or Pareto principle? Apply this rule to the time you invest in social media. Plan 80% of content in advance, and spend the other 20% on live conversations with an audience.

Tip #4: Automate Your Posting

If you don’t make an effort to automate your posting routine, you will never have the time to focus on the essential things that can truly help your business.

If you manage several social networks at once, consider tools like Hootsuite and Social Media Poster. Instead of switching between multiple tabs to post your content in each individual network, you will be able to schedule content for all your social profiles from one tab and create a personalized posting schedule. You’ll have multiple scheduling options as well, whether you want your post to go live immediately, schedule it for later or create a draft and revisit it later:

Tip #5: Interact with Your Audience on Social 

There are two sides to this.

The first one is about monitoring your online mentions across the web and responding to them. The other is about not forgetting to respond to your followers’ messages on social. Both are crucial if you want your business to succeed. So how do you manage both?

People will talk about your brand across the web. And they will either be happy with your brand and want to say thank you, or they’ll be disappointed. You have to respond to both types of mentions, be it a positive review or a total diss.

Social media monitoring tools such as Mention.com, SEMrush Brand Monitoring, or Brand24.com allow you to track and categorize your online mentions, find influencers, and identify new promotional opportunities.

If you have more than one social account, I’d definitely recommend trying Buffer Reply. It helps you keep all your social conversations in one team inbox and respond to them right from the tool’s interface. Another great thing about Buffer Reply is that it provides you with sufficient data about the person you’re talking to, allowing you and your team to create personalized responses.

Keep in Mind: Your customers may contact you directly, or they may leave a review online. Either way, they want and need to be heard. Make communication with your audience, whether online or offline, your key priority.

Tip #6:  Engage your Audience Constantly

Test different content formats. Try videos, live streaming, and quizzes. Take pictures of your product, customers with your product, competitors with your product, and cats with your product. Try jokes, memes, and funny statements—experiment with the potential of humor. Don’t forget to set an engagement metric for all the content you post. Otherwise, how will you know what works and what doesn’t?

You can easily entertain your audience with thematic and occasion-based campaigns. These could be campaigns built around holidays and events such as an upcoming game release or a TV series premiere. They usually require minimum investment and effort on your part. Because the interest in the event is already there, all you need to do is use it to attract people’s attention to your product.

Remember:  Test, experiment with, and measure different types of content. See how your audience reacts and then test it all over again. Social media marketing is all about experimenting and innovating.

Tip #7: Integrate the Online and the Offline

Surely you must have thought about running special offers and competitions for your customers! Make an effort to promote your special offers and sales through social media channels. All it takes to integrate online and offline marketing is the right hashtag. Tools like Hashtagify and Ritetag will not only help you brainstorm new hashtags to use but also show you the popularity and potential reach and impact of specific terms and phrases:

Remember to create a branded hashtag for your product and an additional hashtag for your marketing activities.

The same goes for offline events. Organizing a charity ball or an email marketing panel? Be sure to create a location hashtag to help you connect with local audiences. Examples: #wintergardenfarmersmarket, #dallasfood, #phillysports. Keep in mind that hashtags are everchanging.

Remember: Promoting offline events online is an essential step to a successful marketing strategy. Integrate your online and offline marketing with the right hashtags.

Do you have more tips for small businesses wishing to improve their presence and reputation on social media channels? Let me know in the comments below!

The post 7 Social Media Tips for Small Business Success appeared first on Marketo Marketing Blog - Best Practices and Thought Leadership.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8217493 https://blog.marketo.com/2019/01/7-social-media-tips-for-small-business-success.html

[stupendousbouquetfuryposts-blog]

Closing post-- the “Tumblr Essay”

The idea for this tumblr came in part as an "inspiration" portion to the research i was already doing on the history of healthcare activism by people of color in New York, using the framing of resistance to the Medical-Industrial Complex to inform my lens. I was drawn to the legacy of the Young Lords, the radical Latinx group that held "community health" at the center of their work, most prominently in their takeover of Lincoln Hospital. I also drew from my own knowledge and experience working in harm reduction facilities, teaching sex ed workshops to young POC, and my deep fascination with the AIDS epidemic to explore how grassroots activism often sits at the heart of healthcare interventions concerning marginalized groups. I was equally pushed by my disillusionment at the pre-medical track that I did for 3 years of undergrad, finally pushed out when I realized that the stressful and pressure-cooker STEM environment were not grounds for training a healer. Finally, I was inspired by my collaboration with my friend Janine on a final project for an Ethnic Studies class at Columbia University in Spring 2017, where we used the "teach-in" format as a way of radical knowledge distribution, and included community feedback on health needs directly into the content of our workshop material. 

The workshop material can be found in the second tab of this page, called “Fuck the MIC: Teach In.”

Revisiting my previous "scholarship" with the workshop content, teaching materials, and my anger at the lack of collaboration between traditional STEM fields and social theory within The Academy, I was left thinking extensively about the role of my own friends in community healing. Friends, acquaintances, this network of QTPOC working against all odds to survive at Columbia and 2017 generally, inspired the kind of reflection on what it means to "resist" in this contemporary era, and more importantly, what it could possibly look like to "heal." I realized that the places I went to for the answers to my questions were seldom found on a syllabus or in a journal, but in queer social spaces, namely Twitter, text conversations, late-night "roundtables" accompanied by libations, check-ins during dining hall run-ins, and intimacies between partners. Though automatic pathologization of these people I hold dear would be in contradiction with the spirit of resisting the Medical-Industrial Complex, I know through conversations and interactions that we all deal with "illness" (both mental and physical) intimately, it runs deep within the network. This should come as no surprise, as both “queer” and “trans” have historically been synonymous with disease, and the way structural inequalities play out on marginalized bodies, as public health disciplines are starting to acknowledge. And so, needing to look no further than those around me, I embarked on the journey of chronicling both of those things in tandem, activism history and queer relating, in hopes of making some "sense" out of it. By writing/narrating through illness, or using “Memory as Method” you/we/I can attempt to take ownership of it, to at the very least hold it near and not let it remain an abstraction, so that you/we/I might try to work through it, might to try to heal it. 

The result is this tumblr project which I am calling a "tumblr essay," with use of images, text snippets, poems, theory quotes, photos, and recycled internet images to try (or perhaps fail) to illustrate what "healing" looks like for communities that for all intents and purposes are supposed to remain "sick." Unlike a traditional essay, it reads backwards to forward, starting at the coda and finishing at the introduction. The hashtags are strategically chosen so that clicking on one, for example, “me” would show an illustrative snippet of the posts on the page, perhaps an essay onto itself. I try to nod to my friends and loved ones who have taught me way more about radical care, radical healing, and radical resistance than any classroom I have ever been in. 

Columbia knows it has a mental health issue, it is clear in the communications, in the required trainings, in the sterile template emails it sends out when a student takes their life. They also claim to "care" about us, providing us with a list of "resources" and a list of offices that should, in theory, have an answer for any problem we might face. But I can tell you that-- that shit isn't working, at least not holistically. The real care work, especially for QTPOC, comes directly and almost exclusively from each other. We are limping, stumbling, sometimes failing, and sometimes even triumphing, through racial, medical, academic, and other structures that do not accommodate us. We are (and have been) trying. 

Thank you my wife Janine and my partner Alixx for contributing their thoughts and creative work to my “essay.” 

As I have just attempted to cover the “why,” I plan to continue expanding the workshop material for my spring project, attempting to take (often forgotten) histories of resistance to oppressive healthcare institutions/policies/businesses, compile them, and share them to push our understandings of “healing” and “care” within marginalized communities.