#thank you to the local cat cafe for introducing me to vegan spray whipped cream

[innytoes]

“I would love to lick whipped cream off your body, but I’m afraid I’m lactose intolerant.” for Reggie/Willie

His plan was simple. Willie had given him the key to his place. Not even in a 'for emergencies or to water my plants when I'm away' kind of way. In a 'stop by any time because I love you and I love being with you' kind of way. An 'I cleared out a drawer for you' kind of way. A 'you have your own toothbrush here' kind of way.

So his plan was simple. He was going to sneak into Willie's place right before Reggie knew he'd be home, and surprise him with the sexiest thing he could think of. Well, the sexiest thing he could think of that wasn't Star Wars related.

He heard the door open, heard Willie pause in the doorway. The trail of rose petals was maybe a bit much, but he hadn't known how else to lure Willie to the bedroom in a way that was sexy and not 'is there a burglar in my house'. "Reggie?" Willie called.

"In here," he called back, in what he hoped was a sexy voice. It was kind of hard not to move, but he was determined to make this work and not mess up the sheets before Willie was even in the room. He listened for Willie's footsteps, lifting his head a little and grinning at him in the doorway of his bedroom.

"Oh," Willie said, looking surprised and a little flustered. There were candles all around (well, there were those little candle-shaped lights, since Reggie knew himself, and he didn't think Burning Your Boyfriend's Building Down was particularly sexy), rose petals leading to the bed. And on the bed, there Reggie was, naked and covered in whipped cream.

Super sexy. Amazing surprise. Knocked it out of the park. He was the Best Boyfriend.

He grinned at Willie when he came over and knelt next to the bed. "Surprise," he said. He'd left his face free of whipped cream, even though the urge to draw on a moustache was pretty high. Willie beamed and kissed him, stroking his hair.

"Babe," Willie said, a smile in his voice. "I would love to lick whipped cream off your body, but I'm afraid I'm lactose intolerant."

Oh. Oh no. Willie leaned down again, trying to kiss away the disappointed look on his face. "I'm sorry," Reggie said. "I thought it would be a fun surprise."

"You naked in my bed is always a fun surprise," Willie said. "Stay here, okay? I'm gonna get a towel or something to wipe this off, and then we're going to take a very steamy shower together, and then I'm going to lick you all over."

Okay, so maybe Willie was the Best Boyfriend, because that sounded amazing. He loved showers, especially showers with Willie. "I'm going to make it up to you," he promised.

"You have nothing to make up for, Sunflower," Willie said, kissing him again. "I'm sorry I ruined your big surprise."

-

A week later. He was a genius. He was the Best Boyfriend Ever. He was going to make this work, dammit.

Willie came in, laughing at the rose petals once again leading to the bedroom from his front door. He followed them much quicker this time, eager to see what Reggie had planned, and then... stopped in the doorway, frowning.

"Babe, we've had this conversation," he said, confused. "Did you forget?"

"Bedside table," Reggie said, grinning.

"Is it Lactaid? Because those don't always work one hundred per cent and I don't want to interrupt our fun with... oh." He inspected the can of whipped cream.

"It's vegan," Reggie said, beaming.

"You," Willie said, bending down to kiss him. "Are the best boyfriend ever."