#thank you for feeding my akademiya zandik brainrot 🐺 anon much needed i will be dreaming abt this tonight

[fatuismooches]

Helloowww! How you doing? I hope the things are going well 🤗

Childe was the reason why i got into genshin and he will always be my #1. However, ever since Sumeru, Dottore has been CLAWING his throne and oh man, things are tight here. At this point, i must admit that these two are my favorites yet Dottie has been taking up the spotlight for some time. I have yet another scenario for him!

⚠️SPOILERS FOR ACT 2 FONTAINE AQ⚠️

Neuvillette has confirmed that Childe will have to spend some time in Fortress of Meropide, Fontaine's jail, until the full truth is revealed. I heard we should get the Fortress up for exploration in 4.1, so i really hope we go and visit the boy! However....... What if it was Dottore in his place?

It's difficult to imagine how things would play out if he stood trial in Opera Epiclese (forgive me, i have 2 braincells left and the only information they can process is how wholesome Harbingers + Tsaritsa family is, there is no more space left to discuss the progress of court trial). So let's take a more "comfortable" setting for scenario. Young Dottie, Akademiya days, youthful Reader as his assistant and a slightly fucked up experiment....... Just slightly. A minor slip up here and there, and whoops, the entire Akademiya knows. Sages are not happy but the circumstances are not yet clear, so Zandik is stuffed into jail cell until Matra decides his fate.

Reader doesn't sleep on things. Their bestie roommate has been isolated from the rest of the world and stuffed into some dirty dungeon Celestia knows where under the city. Unacceptable! So they pack their things up and head for a visit.

Zandik is genuinely surprised to see a Matra soldier approach the bars of his cell and tell him he has a visitor. All of a sudden, his one and only assistant appears from behind their backs, with the most charming smile he's ever seen (and this smile in particular gives him an impression that the things are a little fishy here...).

Reader is not allowed to enter the cell and the guard remains close, making sure the regulations of jail are followed thoroughly. Zandik and his assistant, despite the bars separating them, speak to one another like close friends. Reader has brought a whole basket of treats for him! A whole loaf of bread, Zaytun peaches, a glass of Padisarah pudding and even a box of bite-sized samosas. Young future-Harbinger scolds the Reader that they waste their time and energy by cooking so much food and bothering to bring it all for him. Jail provides enough food for survival, even if its tasteless (Reader knows that Zandik is really happy even if he appears to be angry, his blush-tainted cheeks can't lie 🤭)

All of a sudden, the guard nearby yawns and... falls to the ground?! And the Reader doesn't even flinch??? and keeps smilling like nothing happened??? And all of the sudden they grab the loaf of bread, tier it in half and pull the lock pick from inside??? And start to pick the lock on his cell's door???

Zandik has never been this confused.

Reader explains that they sprinkled some hallucinogenic mushroom powder in guard's coffee while fella was busy with some documents but effects ended up knocking him out. Works either way, so it doesn't matter! Matra did investigate the basket Reader brought along and even their clothing, but found nothing suspicious, so they managed to invade the jail with ease. Zandik is quite impressed that his assistant went through all the trouble to get him out of this hole and makes a mental note to thank them later.

Now it's time for the 2nd part of the plan: escaping the jail and deciding further course of action. Matra will surely track them down again if they stay in Sumeru, so it's about time to pack what's most important.

(This is super messy but i tried my best 😂 I will leave it with cliffhanger because oh boi this ask is hella long already whoopsie 😅)

- 🐺

HI 🐺 ANON!! I'm doing fine, what about you? ❤️ And I'm with you there, Childe was originally my favorite character too, i was SO obsessed with him 😭 Unfortunately his place has been toppled and Dottore and Scara have took his spot 💔 I hope you can be stronger than me 🐺 anon 😭🙏 !!

I too hope we can visit Childe. I really hope he isn't dropped of screentime 😭 At least Arlie will fill that void. And if Dottore ever appeared to stand trial... it would be all a part of his plan. He wouldn't be unnerved or worried in the slightest lol, not even taking it seriously while everyone else is fighting for their lives. He's always 20 steps ahead of everyone 🤷‍♀️ You two would be clowning everyone in the courtroom tbh 🤭

Anyway... I find this scenario so funny because it probably DID happen... considering what happened with Sohreh and all *cough cough* bro was probably locked up for a bit eventually. Did he care? No, not really. Just annoyed that he has to waste time in this cell when he could be doing far more useful things. Did you care? Yes, because it was boring without him. So of course you have a backup plan made specially for just-in-case situations like this! You couldn't leave your beloved down there... he totally missed you, right? (He does think it's rather boring down here... but missing you? How preposterous! He's lying to himself.)

I can just imagine the "wtf is actually wrong with you" look the Matra gave you when you appeared with a whole meal for someone like fucking ZANDIK. If you don't have a reputation of your own, you're probably getting questioned if you're being coerced into doing this 💀 The guards are just more confused because Zandik starts scolding you the second he sees you... are you alright? How does this relationship even work in the first place... (They don't think his red cheeks are from blushing... instead of irritation) BRO my favorite part is reader hiding a lock pick in the bread so it wouldn't be found during a body check... the way i would have never thought of that 😭 They are truly worthy of being the one and only Dottore's assistant!

He really didn't expect to have gotten out of here so quickly, sure, he probably could have gotten out of here himself eventually, or just waited to be released. Zandik supposes he underestimated your capabilities a bit... but he won't do that again in the future. Though you'll still be hard-pressed to squeeze a 'thank you' out of this guy, he's still very... you know. But he does appreciate it! There are not many people willing to break the law for him. Lastly... the moral of the story is that underestimating the lover of Il Dottore will land you a fate worse than what you think.