#teyla's the first one to get one

[sga-owns-my-soul]

I feel like John would give really good hugs. He'd bear hug you, but not so tight that it hurts, just enough that it's soothing. Ronon, however, would hug to kill (cannot breathe when he hugs you. People have learned to hold their breath if they see him coming in to hug)

it's a well known fact in the city that john rarely hugs anyone but a hug from john can and will heal pretty much all of your problems. carson has tried multiple times to convince him to give hugs more often for health reasons. john still refuses.

ronon on the other hand cannot stop hugging anyone and everyone every single opportunity he gets. carson keeps asking him to watch his strength bc at least once a month someone ends up in the infirmary with bruised or even cracked ribs from a Ronon Hug (no one can say no to him tho bc he went 7 years without hugs and no one can bring themselves to deny him the much needed human touch he craves)

[hooded-and-cloaked]

John Sheppard Stargate

He's asexual. I just know it. Here's the thing, he's chronically single, he only flirts with women to keep McKay from getting laid, they could not FORCE sexual tension between him and Weir (and they tried). He sees Teyla in the first episode and comphet grips him for literally one second before she's not remotely interested and he can relax. The only time he makes a move on her is when the wraith stuff is in him making him all horny and weird. He apologizes later for his "out of character" behavior. The picnic with the Ancient woman from season 1 episode 14 is another excellent example of him trying to cockblock McKay and also comphet again. A devastating combo. And I think we can all agree that a cute picnic on the balcony and one kiss is not oozing sexuality. I never said aromantic. Although I do think if he's any bit romantic, it's homoromantic (I am also a McShep truther).

[dr-futbol-blog]

The Lost Boys, Pt. 13

While Sheppard is trying to fight his way to Ronon and Teyla, it is unclear what Ford's plan is or whether he even has one, as they seem to have been heading away from the dart bay. There is an interesting transition from McKay mentioning his different gut feeling to Sheppard reloading his gun, pushing in a new magazine while he is holding the weapon against his body. There is something undeniably phallic about the action and the juxtaposition of the scenes invites us to ask what the feeling in Sheppard's gut is like.

Sheppard: Ford, what's your position? Ford! Ah, damn it!

Sheppard tries contacting Ford again but they are in the middle of a firefight and Ford is unable to answer him and this, not knowing what has befallen Ronon and Teyla, seems to inconvenience Sheppard but is far from incapacitating him. He is on a mission and has been trained to function under extreme pressure. Sheppard is far from desperation or the end of his rope here, doing his Rambo-routine. He uses a flashbang to blind the the wraith drone to get past it, shooting it for good measure as he passes, and seems to be doing well until he is caught by surprise, a drone guard shooting him in the back.

They all fight valiantly but are eventually overcome by the wraith that have the upper hand due to sheer numbers, and all of them are stunned. This gives the episode a ring composition, the beginning matches the end. The difference is that now Kanayo is among the people that are stunned rather than doing the stunning, and McKay and Ford have switched places, Ford stunned along with the team and McKay waiting to hear from them in Ford's cave compound. We also get another gratuitous crotch shot as Sheppard is dragged away by the guards, and this the third time in the episode that he is flat on his back. For what ever reason, the camera seems to linger on his... package.

While they are all rendered unconscious, Sheppard is the last one of them to stir because he is also the only one not taking the enzyme. McKay had said that the wraith enzyme made Ford "almost immune" to the wraith stunners so while all of them had been knocked out, the effects seem to have been shorter in everyone else. He looks almost angelic as he sleeps with his head on Teyla's lap, for a brief moment he looks to be in peace. Yet the cold reality of their situation creeps into his consciousness soon enough.

Teyla: Are you alright? Sheppard: We're in a holding cell? Teyla: Yes. Sheppard: On a hive ship? Teyla: Uh-huh. Sheppard: Well, then, no. I'm not doing so good.

This is the second time in the episode that Sheppard has been rendered unconscious by a wraith stunner, and we may compare the way in which he comes to. Here, he basically wants to know where they are. He asks Teyla to give him a sitrep. When they had first stirred in Ford's cave, his first question had been to make sure that the others were alright ("You guys OK?"), with McKay giving him the answer because it is from McKay that Sheppard wanted to hear the response most of all. It was McKay that Sheppard had first looked at as they came to. It is confirmed by this scene, because when McKay is not here, the well-being of everyone else is not his main concern. His main concern seems to be getting them out.

But this is also the second episode in a row where we have found Sheppard waking up from an unconscious state in a holding cell, and the previous time he had woken up to the sound of McKay's voice. And while he had told McKay "I feel better already" in a sarcastic tone upon hearing that McKay had come to rescue him, the sentiment had been genuine. He had felt instantly better hearing McKay's voice.

Here, he wakes up to the cold reality that McKay is nowhere near, and he volunteers the information that he is not doing so good. It is rare for Sheppard to make such confessions, which is testament to just how not good he is currently doing. Especially when he is out on the field, out on a mission with his men, with people serving under him, Sheppard understands the importance of keeping up morale and leading by example, of projecting the character of a fearless and unflappable leader even if it was not what he was feeling inside. For some reason he seems unable to perform this role currently.

Ford: I can't believe you screwed up! Sheppard: I did what? Ford: You set off the alarm. You ruined the mission. Sheppard: The dart went on auto pilot the second I got close to the hive.

The enzyme had been making Ford paranoid from the very beginning and longer exposure to it has seemed to have done nothing to lessen the impact. The moment Sheppard is up Ford gets in his face, blaming him for everything that had gone wrong. Sheppard is offended by the notion because by taking McKay hostage Ford had completely tied his hands. Everything that he had done, everything that he was doing, was in the interest of getting McKay back to Atlantis safe and sound, and the young soldier's accusation that he would have sabotaged the mission on purpose when he had so carefully tried to do everything he could to ensure their safe return was really starting to turn his gear.

Sheppard: You're lucky I was able to get you out! Ford: Well, why would it do that? Why would it go on auto pilot? Sheppard: That's what jumpers do when they gate to Atlantis. Ford: Well, why didn't you say something?

Sheppard has ample opportunity to throw McKay under the bus here. McKay is not with them, so he could easily blame McKay for what had happened even if he did not truly think it, if only to shift the blame. Certainly McKay had not known that the dart would actually be used to fly into a hive and if he had, he might have been able to do something about the autopilot. He had not thought it necessary and hence had not even attempted to disengage it. It would be so easy for Sheppard to tell Ford that McKay had not had time or opportunity to do anything about it, or that Ford himself had been the reason that McKay had been unable to fix the issue. But that is not what he does. Sheppard does not even think that any of this is even remotely on McKay and even if it was, he would defend McKay against any insinuation that anything that had happened could have been prevented by him. Because McKay is not the guy who opens doors and hacks computers for him. That is not what they are.

Sheppard: Why didn't I say something? Ford: You want me to fail. You want me to look bad! Sheppard: Yeah, that's right, you snot-nosed brat. I put my team's life on the line just to prove you wrong!

Note that now that McKay is not here, he is not in any type of danger that might be triggered by Sheppard's actions toward Ford, he lets him have it. He does not hold back, calling Ford a snot-nosed brat, letting him in on what he really thinks about him and his antics. McKay was the only reason he held his tongue earlier, McKay was the only reason he went along with this plan and now that it seemed like the plan had been a complete and utter bust, he had no reason to hold back.

Ford is was correct in thinking that McKay was Sheppard's motivation for doing "the right thing". Ford's only saving grace here was that Sheppard hated the wraith even more, and there was still a part of Ford that was human. And even though both Sheppard and McKay had tried to tell Ford what a bad plan this was, Ford's question of why he had not said anything is offensive to him because by holding McKay hostage, Ford had forced his hand. And what Sheppard lets slip here at the end is interesting. He thinks that he put his team's lives on the line. He did not do it for Ford but he does seem to feel like that is what he had been forced to do. And he had done this, all of this, for McKay. He had put his team's lives on the line to keep McKay safe. That is what he tells us here. That is what he confesses.

Dex: We've got company. Wraith: Move away. Dex: What do you want? Wraith: The one who flew the ship. Dex: Why don't you start with me? Sheppard: Wait, wait, wait! You want me.

Sheppard and Ford's verbal brawl is interrupted by the arrival of the wraith. Ronon, who has been held captive on a hive before and who hates the wraith probably most of any of them (and they all have plenty of hate for the wraith), steps up to them and challenges the the wraith. We see here how protective Ronon is of Sheppard, fully intending to make the wraith go through him to get to Sheppard. And while he may like Teyla well enough, he would definitely help her out and look out for her when needed, it is Sheppard that Ronon is guarding. It is Sheppard that Ronon feels he owes his freedom to.

And let us just underscore this point: Ronon does protect McKay until the very final episode of the show but he is doing it for Sheppard. He is protecting McKay because of his gratitude to Sheppard, because he is trying to repay what he sees as a life-debt to him. This, how fiercely protective Ronon is of Sheppard tells us that he must see how important McKay is to him. Because Sheppard would so gladly throw himself in front of a bullet for McKay, in order to keep Sheppard safe Ronon also has to protect McKay. In Search and Rescue (S05E01), when Sheppard thinks that his actions have led to McKay being killed, Ronon tries to keep him alive by the sheer of power his will. But he is unable to protect Sheppard here as the wraith stun him to get him out of the way, and Sheppard volunteers to go to spare the others.

Something interesting happens then. The wraith had told them that they were looking for the human that had piloted the dart, which is fair enough. They are not used to humans using their technology or attacking their hives, so interrogating the one that had done the unthinkable, had accomplished something that had never even been tried before, makes sense. But the wraith clearly smells Sheppard before being satisfied that this is indeed the person they are looking for.

In the holding cell, all of the others are on the wraith enzyme and Teyla and Ford are both part wraith. All of them should have been more interesting targets for interrogation, especially in light of what Jace had told McKay earlier about the wraith being afraid of Teyla's ability to tap into their psychic network. But something about Sheppard smells different. And out of all the people in the holding cell, Sheppard is the only one with the Ancient gene. That is the thing that makes him different. And if they do have a particular scent to them, we might ask if the pull the Ancients feel toward each other is based on smells, is based on pheromones. We do not know what Sheppard smells like to the wraith but likely to other people with the gene, he has to smell pretty good. People are drawn to him.

Ford: It's alright. There's always a way out. Dex: If he dies, you die.

As they lead Sheppard away he almost turns to look back but then does not, and as per usual, he has no good-byes or final words to impart them with. Ronon's line to Ford here is interesting because it is not only verbal confirmation of how protective he is of Sheppard. Here, we see Ronon tell Ford something that Sheppard had thought earlier on the planet when Ford had given him his gun back. Sheppard had thought it, had tried to communicate it with the look in his eyes, but had been unable to say it out of fear that McKay might end up paying for any wrong move on his part. He had not said it but it is obvious that he thought it here: if he dies, you die.

The episode ends with Sheppard being escorted to what is likely not originally an interrogation area since the wraith likely do not interrogate a whole lot of humans in their hives, but instead is some kind of a holy of holies, a platform where the wraith queen receives audience. What is notable is that the platform is shaped like a vulva, and it is not coincidental because, as discussed previously, the wraith imagery draws a lot from the monstrous feminine and there is symbolism in bringing Sheppard forcibly to his knees on the altar of female sexuality, as he is here.

I will discuss more with the next episode but even further with Epiphany (S02E12) how there are heavy hints of Sheppard having suffered sexual violence at the hands of women in positions of authority in his youth. This theme is never verbalized but it keeps coming up again and again. And where the wraith in general represent the dark and frightening side of female sexuality, it is never more apparent than in the figures of the wraith queens.

Sheppard had watched Colonel Sumner suffer at the hands of one of their queens and he had personally had to make the call to take the life of his superior officer rather than to let him continue suffering at her hands. And now it seemed like the same fate awaited him.

Queen: Kneel!

The queen seems to use her psychic powers to bring Sheppard to his knees, to compel him to submit. And as we end the episode with a cliffhanger, it seems a though Sheppard is unable to resist her in this. We had started the episode with McKay asking Sheppard if he would rather not be on a tropical beach planet with tall blonde women, and he would really, really rather not be anywhere with this tall blonde woman. He really quite misses wasting his time listening to McKay right about now.

So, the name of the episode. It is an obvious reference to Scottish playwright J. M. Barrie's play/novel Peter Pan; or, the Boy Who Wouldn't Grow Up (1904) / Peter and Wendy (1911), where the Lost Boys are Peter's companions in Neverland -- but who are the "lost boys" here? Ford is certainly one of them, as he is explicitly described by Sheppard as MIA in the episode. Ford has also gathered up a group of misfits around him that he calls "wildmen," so all of these boys are probably more or less lost. Then there is the team who are also MIA for most of the episode, officially declared so by Weir at the end. While Teyla is obviously not a boy, this is lampshaded by an exchange Lorne and Weir have when the team first fail their scheduled check-in:

Lorne: Well, you know those guys. Weir: What do I know about those guys?

They are further called guys by Ford and even Sheppard himself several times. In this regard Teyla is also a "lost boy," and having been kidnapped, all the boys are lost. In a sense, all of them are also orphans, even though later on we discover that Sheppard's father had actually been alive the whole time, because Teyla and Ronon have both lost their families to the wraith.

Peter Pan is an orphan boy that never wants to grow up, who loves to fly and who travels with a fairy. Understandably the gay community has embraced this story and it has deep roots within the LGBT+ subculture. Peter Pan -syndrome, arrested development and delayed adulthood is also something that was often associated with gay men, especially back when many social institutions connected to adulthood and maturation, like marriage and adoption, were still out of the reach of non-straight people. Traditionally, the role of Peter Pan was also played by a woman, inserting an undeniable element of queerness into Peter and Wendy's relationship which is naturally only teased, never consummated, on stage. In fact, Barrie claims to have written the role for a woman originally.

If Peter with his love of flying can be associated with Sheppard, then it is easy to connect Wendy with her abusive father to McKay, and for some reason McKay seems to be connected to female roles a lot more often than Sheppard. In fact, when we are finally revealed "the game" they have been playing behind the scenes all these years, McKay's avatar is a blonde woman because that is his internal self-representation, whereas Sheppard's leather daddy is not so much a representation of Sheppard as it is of his desire--and it is ironic that people very often read their strategies in the game as completely opposite to this, as Sheppard self-representing as a gruff bear that is shorter than him and balding, and McKay as being attracted to blonde women just because he says he is even though it is more admiration and appreciation he feels toward them.

The subtext of Peter Pan has been discussed in literature for a long time, and in fact it may have represented the kind of escapism as "the game" did for both McKay and Sheppard:

There are similarities between Wendy and McKay even more than in their abusive fathers. Like McKay, Wendy hesitates at first to fly off to Neverland with Peter but she comes to enjoy her adventures. Ultimately, however, she chooses to go back to her parents and accepts that she has to grow up and we will return to this later, but twice we witness McKay make the choice of going by the socially more acceptable route to his own detriment, and it is left up to the audience whether we see the tragedy in the fact that Peter Pan never wishes to grow up or in the fact that Wendy makes the choice to grow up and is forever shut out of the magical land untouched by death. And like McKay in this episode, Wendy is held hostage by Captain Hook. Let us also note that the most recent adaptation to this episode (the 2003 film) also features what is called a hidden kiss (that is not very hidden at all) that gives Peter the wherewithal to save the day. And it is preceded by Captain Hook telling him, "You die alone and unloved, just like me," which we know is also Sheppard's fear. There are certainly elements of the story of Peter Pan both here and in the next episode that takes place inside the "pirate ship".

The title might also contain a reference to the motion picture The Lost Boys (1987) featuring vampires as an allegory for gay youth, and the film has well-known and rather blatant homoerotic subtext. Everyone from the creators to the actors to the gay director have acknowledged that the film's undertones are very nearly overtones, and the film has served as the awakening of many non-straight teenagers:

As the AIDS epidemic raged on and Ronald Reagan’s conservative moralism further ostracized the “other,” it wasn’t a stretch to read the film’s undead bad boys—with their leather get-ups and embrace of a chosen family—as stand-ins for the gay community in the late ’80s.

This reading is problematic in the same vein as reading Ellia's story as an allegory for homosexuality is problematic in that both the wraith and the vampires are evil. The film takes its name from Peter Pan, the ever-youthful vampires living in the same suspended youth as the lost boys of Neverland. The fact that Michael, the brother that is infected by the vampires is only saved by his refusal to feed is a reflection of Regan-era attitudes toward homosexuality.

The film acknowledges non-normative sexualities but inserts a curative element into the story, at the heart of which is a kind of moral panic over those uncontrollable urges of gay youth. And yet the aesthetic of Ford's wildmen borrows heavily from the film, his ragtag team of misfits clad in leather and grime. It is fitting also in the sense that Ford's men have been transformed by an enzyme extracted from the space vampires, and while it is never textually acknowledged, the boost that the enzyme gives them actually ultimately comes from the people consumed by the wraith. It is human life essence, years of another's life, that they have become addicted to. In a sense, the lost boys are also all the people that have been culled by the wraith.

However, the titles most often seem to reference both Sheppard and McKay, the two of them in particular. They are the actual lost boys here, trying to find their way back to each other but unable to get there. By the end of the episode we see explicitly what has been true for them for a while now--circumstances conspire to keep them separated, away from each other. Without McKay, Sheppard is lost. And with Sheppard gone, McKay loses himself. Without each other they are both lost.

And in this regard, there is another potential reference that I find interesting. In 1985, during the height of the AIDS epidemic Michael Lassell wrote an award-winning collection of poetry called Poems for Lost and Un-Lost Boys. Among the poems is one entitled How to Watch Your Brother Die that is about something that we have seen the show dance around: how difficult it is to grieve a lover when the world does not acknowledge your relationship.

Watch the tears well up in his eyes. Say, “I’m sorry. I don’t know what it means to be the lover of another man.” Hear him say, “It's just like a wife, only the commitment is deeper because the odds against you are so much greater.” Say nothing, but take his hand like a brother’s. [...] Call your wife on the telephone. Tell her, “He hasn’t much time. I’ll be home soon.” Before you hang up say, “How could anyone’s commitment be deeper than a husband and a wife?” Hear her say, “Please. I don’t want to know all the details.” When he slips into an irrevocable coma, hold his lover in your arms while he sobs, no longer strong. Wonder how much longer you will be able to be strong. Feel how it feels to hold a man in your arms whose arms are used to holding men. Offer God anything to bring your brother back. Know you have nothing God could possibly want.

Likely their intention was just to make a Peter Pan reference, that is by far the easiest interpretation of the title. But while our boys may have been lost at this time, they were trying to find their way back to each other, to become unlost. These poems may explain why Sheppard and McKay make the kind of choices they do, again and again. The commitment is deeper because the odds against them are so much greater. Theirs is the bond that is deeper than words.

[chaos-monkeyy]

Alrighty here's an SGA team-poly-ship WIP that I got a decent start on 3 years ago, but which I know I'm never going to write more for. Little bit of explicit content below the cut!

John/Teyla/Ronon/Rodney, sleeping together and Sleeping Together

Working title: Group

Teyla snored. She insisted she didn’t, but she did. 

Rodney was all elbows, and didn’t stop talking and muttering to himself even when he was fast asleep.

Ronon, a little surprisingly, was the worst blanket-thief John had ever met. He was also, less surprisingly, an incurable cuddler. 

And John himself… Well, John honestly wasn’t sure what his ‘thing’ was— but for all the snoring and elbow-jabs and sleepy overheating bear hugs, he’d never in his life slept so well as he did with the three of them. 

It had all started by accident. On a long away-mission, travelling by foot with the locals to a remote temple of healing that sounded distinctly promising on the Ancient technology front, John’s team had wound up sharing a single large tent every night. Apparently communal sleeping was the norm for that particular society, and Teyla had quietly but sternly warned him that their guides would almost certainly look on them with suspicion if they refused to share. Maybe even refuse to lead them to the temple after all; and something on the planet screwed with the jumper sensors and flight controls too much to try and fly there themselves. 

So, they’d very graciously accepted their shared sleeping tent for the approximately week-long journey there and back. 

It hadn’t been so bad; a little awkward at first, maybe, but the nights were uncomfortably cold and the extra body heat was far from unwelcome. Plus, it wasn’t like John wasn’t used to bunking down in shared barracks anyway. 

The part he’d been much less used to was finding himself in the middle of what amounted to a cuddle pile the next morning. But by the time they got back to the village near the stargate, even waking up in a cozy tangle of limbs had started feeling almost… normal. So normal, in fact, that once they did get back to Atlantis, John hadn’t been able to sleep properly without them anymore. 

As it turned out, the feeling was mutual, and… well, one thing eventually led to another. 

…

Ronon somehow always managed to wake up first. 

John didn’t particularly mind. Especially not on mornings like this one, where he gradually slipped awake to the feeling of a familiar body moving against him and the slow, luxurious recollection that it was their day off and nobody had to get up yet. 

Or, get out of bed, more accurately. Seemed some people were definitely getting something up already. 

John hummed quietly, shifting sleepily as Ronon’s mouth found his neck, lips soft and wet and smiling against his skin. He could feel the light graze of Ronon’s teeth and the scratchy tickle of his beard as he meandered a slow trail down John’s exposed neck to his bare shoulder, one large, warm hand sliding up John’s leg under the sheets and over his hip. 

He could also feel Ronon’s erection, already hard and full, rutting lazily against him from behind while Ronon kept mouthing at him and running that hand teasingly over his stomach, squeezing his hip; just barely brushing past the base of John’s filling cock and away again until John was squirming slowly in place and panting softly for breath. In front of him, Teyla blinked awake, a smile spreading over her face as she watched Ronon pushing the covers down and continuing his lazy trail down John’s body.

[dedkake]

SGA Fanworks Only Holiday Gift Exchange 2023

A day you won’t forget by scifi_dancer | g, 2.4k, rodney / john

The prompt I used describes it well: "Nothing goes right - until it does."

A Little Christmas Chaos by WonkyElk | t, 3k, rodney / john

The Cheer Committee nodded in solemn and united agreement. In principle, of course, they agreed that ‘absolutely hosed’ was not the ideal state for a large proportion of the expedition to be in, at any one time, Christmas or not; but that didn’t stop them feeling that the punch could do with being just a smidgen merrier. For morale purposes. Which was why each of them, separately, decided to add just the tiniest amount of extra cheer to the punch.

Big enough to miss by Mas_Pebbles_Sharp | t, 3.9k, rodney / john

Missing scenes/coda to The Daedalus Variations: Rodney's injury from alien weapon fire is worse than they at first realised

Elizabeth’s Pet Demon by Tazmy | g, 2.8k, gen

A mini demon ransacks Elizabeth’s quarters. Somehow, it’s cute. It shouldn’t be. It should be wrong, maybe even disturbing.

Finding Limits by halestrom | g, 3.6k, gen

The only thing John could focus on was getting back to Atlantis, getting a team and finding Rodney before Ford's men did anything. Getting back to Atlantis and finding out that Rodney had rescued himself wasn't a surprise, but sitting and watching his still body as Carson tried to figure out what to do was hard. Not just for John, but for all of AR-1.

First Embrace by Cyber_Witch85 | m, 2.8k, carson / evan, rodney / john, evan / john

John Sheppard and Evan Lorne rescue Rodney and Carson from a wraith lair. Carson and Evan explore the beginnings of their relationship as John and Rodney sleep.

Golden Slumbers by cassiope25 | g, 3.8k, rodney / john, team

“You should put more trust in me,” Ronon told her gently. "There's nothing a former runner can't take on.” Ronon is there to care for his team, and they care for him in turn.

Hand in Hand by mific | e, 4.7k, rodney / john

"Yes, yes, we're the talk of the town," Rodney said, eyeing them narrowly. "Run along now and if you're ever on Cambara don't agree to do the damn welcome ritual." "And if you do," Sheppard panted, "don't come last."

His Rodney by Jade | g, 1.5k, gen

It’s not always easy to remember who he is.

I Can Do Anything Better Than You! by Goddess47 | t, 3k, rodney / john

John, the traitor, had lured him to this so-called 'social event' organized by some self-appointed group of Expedition members. There had been a promise of chocolate cake and John had hinted at the possibility of mutual orgasms at the end of the night.

i waited ‘til i saw the sun by LogicGunn | t, 1k, steven / elizabeth

Elizabeth remembers.

I’ll keep you warm by puddlejumperpilot | g, 2k, rodney / john

The sky was darkening and fluffy snowflakes were falling from the sky as Teyla gave her speech, but John was distracted by Rodney shivering violently next to him. John swore under his breath and took off the outer layer of his jacket, wrapping it around Rodney’s shoulders. “You’re from Canada, aren’t you supposed to be immune to the cold?” He hissed under his breath. Rodney shot him a glare. “You know I get cold easily!” He replied in a whisper. “I also know that you do this every year. I’m beginning to think you just like wearing my jacket. You’re lucky I expected this, otherwise I’d just let you freeze!”

Just Peachy by melagan | t, 1.7k, rodney / john

John and Rodney are married and living on Atlantis. They have a rare day off together, but things aren't working out the way Rodney planned.

Lighter Than Air by spurious | g, 2.6k, rodney / john

Visiting a trading partner, the team participate in a winter solstice ritual that's more effective than it might seem.

Like A Shot To The Shoulder (And Other Adventures on MXR-338) by audioletter | g, 2.8k, gen

As far as welcomes go, being shot in the shoulder was not what John considered polite.

Solace by A_Storm_of_Roses | e, 7.2k, teyla / elizabeth

Elizabeth wakes with the hangover of the century and a throbbing elbow. She can’t remember how she got here, or where here even is, though it feels hard and rocky and smells like burning metal. Elizabeth and Teyla take a very long walk, and discover each other.

the snow has drifted high by dedkake | t, 1.7k, rodney / john

Rodney and John watch the New Year's fireworks together, just like they always do.

Wraith Rodney by carsonsweebabyturtles (Erindors) | fanart

This is my Holiday gift for Cassiope25. I kind of gambled at making him a Wraith but I hope you like it anyways 💜

You can’t pin joy like a moth by QueenIshtar | t, 3.7k, john / elizabeth, carson / rodney

Elizabeth knows that you can't pin joy like a moth. It's too fleeting. Joy is the soft fluttering of wings you notice only in the still, silent moments. It's your heartbeat rushing, racing when you laugh; when you feel alive. Joy is not a complete, tangible thing.

[parhelios]

part two of the stargate atlantis animorphs au where john sheppard used to be tobias! this will hopefully get turned into a full fic at some point but i like telling ppl about my fic ideas its fun

an important part of this au is that at least once on atlantis people have started reminiscing about favorite foods on earth they miss and when john was asked what he missed the most, he just blinks and says "burgers" and everyone gives him shit about his basic ass answer but little do they know the real answer is fresh mouse

part one here

he never really realized just how much he missed truly flying on his own wings until he did it for the first time in too many years, circling over the spires of atlantis and relishing the feeling of thermals under his spread wings. he can’t help but chuckle as on the way to rodney’s lab later in the day, he spots some of the biologists in their lab losing their minds. he does make a note to be a little less conspicuous though. john makes another note to let chaya know that if she ever needs anything, he’s her man, for the rest of time. he’s never been more grateful for anything.

(meanwhile, rodney and less so elizabeth, have been tinhatting about john since kolya's invasion of atlantis. john was weird enough they decided they needed to investigate him more and found that large swaths of his childhood and teen years are redacted to hell and back. they can't even figure out when he was born, exactly. it's WEIRD, and the fact that not even weir has clearance makes it all the more disturbing. rodney tries his best to find an unredacted version--surely it must be somewhere in the files sent on the atlantis expedition, in case of emergency--but not even that works. the thing is, by this point, john is their friend, and though they are definitely concerned and more than a little weirded out, they trust him. they trust that if it becomes necessary, he'll trust them too.)

missions go for the most part as normal, but whenever john can get the free time, he spends it flying. eventually, ar-1 gets sent out on a recon mission to a new gate location, a supposedly uninhabited planet which they believe might serve as a potential alpha site for atlantis in case of wraith incursion

as they begin their expedition, the group moves through the brush, ears and eyes sharp for any darts or wraith patrols. they walk for some time, having chosen to head in the direction of what looks to be a plume of smoke in the sky--perhaps a sign of civilization? certainly an anomaly worth checking out. when they reach the source of it, all four come to the same conclusion. a ship has crashed here. small fires still burn in the trees and brush at the edge of the clearing from its crash landing, but for the most part it looks only superficially damaged. however, not one of them save john recognize the design, and john keeps his mouth shut.

it is an andalite blade ship, and john wonders wildly about what it could be doing so far from home as he leads rodney, teyla, and ronon towards the entrance. he's able to keep his reaction to himself pretty easily, years of having to think about his face and his words coming in very handy for deception. rodney and the rest recognize it as being like nothing they've ever seen before--an egg-like pod with a tail curving above it, ending in a sharp point facing the front of the ship, two small, stubby wings curving off of the side. rodney starts to lose it with excitement at another spacefaring race which they have not encountered before, and john has to keep his mouth shut. after the war with the yeerks, the andalites and the humans had come up with a plan to deal with the yeerks, which none of the animorphs had been privvy to, except that once they were dealt with, the andalites would return to their part of the galaxy under seerow's kindness (their prime directive) and not contact the humans again. they took ax, the one andalite who had joined the animorphs and fought alongside them for the whole war, and they took the morphing cube, and they'd said that earth could keep the animorphs and any remaining technology left behind by the andalites or yeerks on earth. what they were doing here, he had no answers for, and he knew that rodney would be inevitably disappointed when he learned that they were all major assholes who wanted nothing to do with earth and had avoided aiding them until the eleventh hour.

when they get inside, john notes no signs of the pilot, and tunes out rodney's excitement at the pilot's chair clearly designed for a quadraped, and heads straight for the console, to try and find out all he can while the team is distracted examining the ship itself. his knowledge of andalite is ingrained, still sitting in the back of his mind from when elfangor gave him his knowledge. from what he can tell, this was an experimental blade ship designed for long-range travel through z-space, featuring a prototype andalite hyperdrive, which apparently worked a little too well. after poking around some, the team determines they should get as much data as they can for themselves from the ship and head back to the gate to pass the info on to weir and return with a bigger science team to study the ship itself. john makes a private note to hold a briefing. this requires a bit of an update in clearance for everyone involved.

of course, the best laid plans of mice and men gang aft agley, and as they leave the ship they are promptly ambushed and captured by a wraith patrol.

while the rest are thrown in a cell, john is taken to the wraith queen, who interrogates him on the crashed ship and though he protests ignorance, she decides to drain him until he breaks. she seems to believe it is some new trick by the atlanteans, but john catches something she likely did not mean to slip to him. she references a prisoner, and from what little she reveals, it sounds like the andalite pilot. john refuses to give up any information to her, and so the queen decides, drained as he is, that he is best used as an example for the rest of his friends, to... encourage them to cooperate. she drains him practically to the point of death, and has him dragged back to the cell, throwing him to the dirty floor at the feet of his friends.

he can feel himself dying, as he lays in the cell, every bone screaming as his team surrounds him, and he feels tears dripping onto his face, which he knows without looking is withered and aged from the feeding. and john knows in that moment that there is one way that this will go, unless he changes. he mumbles out an apology, tells them not to worry about him, and not to freak out. and then he begins the change.

for those unaware, morphing is a process which tends to be extremely unpleasant to watch, unless the morpher is an estreen who can control the process of the morph. john is very much not an estreen, despite his deep familiarity with being a hawk, and he knows exactly what this looks like as the shift megins and he takes in the horror on the faces of rodney, teyla, and ronon. he’d seen people shift birds, and the first time he'd done it, he'd watched himself in a mirror, out of pure curiosity.

the eyes went first, turning big and yellow. you could hear the crunch and grind of bones as they shrunk and molded into each other, the mass folding into z-space and condensing as his fingers merged and feet split, limbs and body shrinking into itself. feathers began to burst from the skin, starting as strange mottled patterns on the skin before lifting themselves up. the corners of his mouth stretched up as the bones of his face shifted and the skin receded over his elongating beak, leaving yellow keratin behind.

the morph felt the same as always, but alongside the grinding of bones and the odd crushing feeling that always came with a smaller morph, john could feel the strength returning to his body the closer he got to hawk-shape. as the morph finishes, he reaches out with thought-speak to the others, trying to get them to stop freaking out as he wriggles free of his shirt and vest, ruffling his wings.

rodney immediately goes "I FUCKING KNEW IT-okay not the bird thing i did not see that one coming but SOMETHING was going on--" but john's thought-speak very quickly shuts him up, and he takes the initiative of rodney's dropped jaw to come up with a quick plan and hop out of the cell through one of the holes in the wraith netting. the wraith probably think he’s dead already, and john is happy to keep it that way—he’s got an escape to make.

[lightthewaybackhome]

This is one of those episodes that isn't itself overly sad or hard, but it feels sad and hard when you know where Atlantis and the team are headed. When you know that when Elizabeth says she might have to resign in protest to not being listened too, she doesn't know how short a time she has on Atlantis.

It's hard in the first half because Atlantis is fractured between the military and the civilians. This is hard because on Atlantis, they've all been working together, and now they disagree, and they're not listening to each other.

But! I love that things click for Sheppard when he's telling Ronon and Teyla about the Fantastic Four, that they're a team and they'll figure it out. At that moment, he goes to find Rodney and the immediately figure it out. Atlantis needs both the military and the civilian team members but they have to work together.

I love Ellis because he grows. He starts out a bit pig-headed, but honestly I get that. He was given a mission, not given wiggle room. But I love that he comes back an apologizes and humbles himself to make things right with Elizabeth.

I love Rodney reminding Ellis it's not his call. I love Sheppard-could-have-been-in-Mensa figuring it out. And for some reason, I love Sheppard's face when he's concentrating on flying Atlantis. He seems calm but determined and focused.

Then of course the whole thing ends with disaster.

Oh, and Lorne! I watched an SG-1 episode the other day from Season 10 and it also had Lorne in it! So nice to see him.

[go-to-autistic-crypt1d]

I'm re-watching SGA again and omfg the first episode when weir and daniel are talking, "Atlantis" "I think we can go there" CHILLS

(Gonna be updating this like live tweeting because I can and I will)

-(@autistic-crypt1d)

Updates:

- Ok so straight up did not remember there was no intro for the first few episodes. Also, John and Teyla's first interactions are sooooo awkward, I always forget that. DAMN the plot is so good right off the bat though. The city rising from the ocean??? BEAUTIFUL, MORE CHILLS, GORGEOUS.

- the color scheme and lighting for the wraith ships is soooooo different in the beginning WOW. The blue and grey, complete lack of other colors aside from a slight yellowish light. So drastically different from the heavy yellow and green fleshyness it becomes later on.

- FORD, AHH 💛

- I've always wondered if the red haired wraith was intentionally not following the black or white hair scheme or if that was a pilot thing where they hadn't thought that far yet. (If anyone knows please lmk)

- DAMN the wraith are so fucking cool. I'm 1000% going to make a whole seperate post ranting about them, but I just have to say they introduce them SO WELL. They're intimidating, mysterious, powerful, and not to mention SO UNIQUE. GAAAAAH!!

- "We are merely the caretakers for the ones who sleep" CHILLS. FUCKING CHILLS DUDE. All the lifsigns appearing and the pods lighting up??? BRUH

- Ok Teyla and John's first head bonk, ADORABLE. I love that they do that and that's their thing ya know? Like it's her people's thing but the only expedition member she does it with is John as far as I can remember.

- Episode 3, THE INTRO ARRIVES AND IT IS BEAUTIFUL

- gotta say, the personal forefield thing is a lil inconsistent, like the coffee can't touch his body in the slightest but he can grip the cup? Could be that they're expecting the viewer to assume the forcefield is creating a gap between his hand and the cup and just left out the sound and green flash, but idk

- Jinto (Ginto? I'm not sure how it's spelled) is such a fun character, I wish he was featured with the other ethosians after the move from Atlantis :/

- I love how Sheppard, Teyla, and Rodney all start to really become a team already in ep 3 with the shadow creature. All 3 not knowing eachother really at all, but after everything on the wraith ship and now with this creature threatening everyone on atlantis, they come together and we see their strengths as individuals and their ability to work together using them. Plus getting to see Rodney really step up and be selfless really gives you a new view on him after his appearances on SG-1.

- idk if it was intentional, but Ford being in the infirmary and not with the other 3 could be some serious foreshadowing for later. I mean him not being there while the majority if the team forms really does not set him up for success being the fourth. Don't get me wrong, I adore Ford, I just also think that Ronan fits the team better and provides a better dynamic.

- I kinda love how there's no discussion shown about Teyla joining the team, she's just on the next mission with them. After the 3rd episode it just makes sense ya know?

- iratus (aratus?) bug, then eventually John literally gets infected and starts turning into a wraith cuz of the retro virus? Bro cannot catch a break

- gotta say, the audio balancing in this show is not my favorite, I always have to crank it up by like 10 when it's all talking and then am immediately auditorally flashbanged when the action starts 😂

- I know it's all serious and shit but Rodney and Ford getting tossed around the back of the jumper is fucking hilarious, especially knowing that they themselves are throwing themselves around

- UGH KAVANAGH

- "don't talk to me about screwed!" Teyla's face at Rodney, PRICELESS. Like, do you not see the man paralyzed with the bug on his neck sapping his life force? Stfu

- omfg I never noticed before but when they're running up the dirt hill from the wraith in John's flashback of the bug attachment, Teyla grabs his arm to get up the hill because the sand is constantly crumbling 😂

- Weir putting Kavanagh in his place, PEAK.

- "you're telling me he can't go through the gate while that thing is on him?" "Then we must do something NOW" THE DRAMA, I LOVE IT, THE MUSIC AS BECKETT EXPLAINS THE PLAN, UGH, SO GOOD

- man even though everyone was fine you can see on Halling's face how the fact that Weird didn't allow the ceremony to happen affected him. Like, would it have sucked for the rest of the people on the ship to be told to prepare to die? Yes, but Teyla might have felt comforted by it, we don't get to find out. Really foreshadows all the conflict that occure between the cultures because of their differences later on and how the expedition's culture is always the one that gets its way. The Athosian's really get the short end of the stick in their relationship with the expedition members for like, the entire show :/

- OOF and it only gets worse with Ep 5 when they think there's a spy and only after basically accusing every Athosian of maybe colluding with the wraith (literally the biggest insult you could ever say to an Athosian or really anyone in the pegasus galaxy), do they find out about the necklace. Not to mention the tension when Bates accused Teyla and all that goes down I mean, YIKES.

- ANYWAY

- I will never get over the fact that they fucking TAZED a wraith dude 😂

- ok so they've captured their first wraith, but I always wondered why they never bothered to try and capture another iratus bug. I mean, they already theorized in its first appearance that they're some sort of prehistoric ancestor to the wraith and they're easier to contain and handle than a whole ass wraith so why no let study it? I think they do later when the whole inoculation thing happens but I guess idk why they wouldn't take the opportunity to study something like that off the bat. Even just to study the regenerative abilities.

- bro episode 6 makes me so sad every time, the ancients really just decided to tell them to off themselves in order to get to their version of heaven instead of something asking the lines of maybe, idk, don't have too many kids or something?? Don't stray outside the field?? Anything else??? I'm sure the ancients had some sort of birth control, maybe share that tech??

- is it just me or does Keras 1000% have a crush on Sheppard? (Who could blame him tbh) I mean, the smile he gives him at the end???

- brooooo not the Hoffan drug event 😭 it's so sad dude, the desperate attempt to save themselves only for it to kill a huge chunk of their people and lead to them fleeing their planet as the wraith attempt to wipe them out.

- ya know, they keep that wraith in the brig for a while and there's no bathroom in there, do wraith even need to use the bathroom since they only feed on life force? If they eat regular food does that mean they have to use the bathroom?

- ok ep 8, underground, absolutely one of the most infuriating episodes imo. The Genii are great antagonists, but god damn are they infuriating about ittttt. Tyrus getting himself killed in the wraith ship and Teyla getting blamed for it??? Don't even get me started on Kolya and Sora dude.

- ya know, I find it interesting how they differentiate scientists and military personnel in the field initially. It changes at some point but right now the scientists are in the tan color while military are in the dark navy. They obviously have the color coding back at atlantis with the color blocking, but the field stuff changes and I think that's interesting.

- the cocooning thing the wraith do to save victims for a later feeding is such a horrific and unique thing to add to them as a species and enemy. Like, that's so cool in such an awful way, they really nailed making the wraith scary dude.

- man it's so weird to see this version of the wraith ships, they're so much more techy than fleshy

- ok so ep 9 "Home", always confused me for one reason, Simon and Elizabeth. They mention him like once after his first appearance I think with absolutely zero follow up. He's such a weird like Checkovs gun fuck up (I think I'm using that right, he's like the opposite of "if you mention a gun it should eventually go off"). His relationship with Weir is never flushed out further and it's all so weird.

- something I really like about the episode is how right off the bat there's hints that something is wrong after they believed they dialed earth. Like, when Weir comes through the gate into the SGC she's alone, but in the briefing room suddenly McKay is with her. Of course things only get more confusing from there once we see Sheppard there etc etc.

- can we all agree they did Teyla so damn dirty with her hair rn

- ep 10 THE STORM OMFG. I am SO excited for this episode dude let's goooooooo

- THE DRAMAAAA, god the scene is set so perfectly, the coming storm, the danger, the empty city, GAH such a good setting for what's to come

- the fucking bacon convo between the two guards PFFFFT, I love it so much dude

- Rodney slickly leaning on the intercom to alert Sheppard is just so good. I love those two SO MUCH dude. Those two can do fuckin anythinggggg.

- Sheppard yelling at Kolya over the walkie in the wind with the waves crashing, god he's such a badass and everyone fucking KNOWS ITTTT

- I FORGOT IT WAS A 2 PARTER. I'm even more excited about The Eye, shit is about to get REAL.

- Rodney standing between Kolya with the gun and Elizabeth, I love that man dude.

- "Oh would you look at this?! That is just never gonna be useful again!" - Rodney McKay, being dramatic as per usual and I love it

- John sheppard literally in the rafters waiting for the Genni FOOLS who thought they could take him. Bro really saw those life signs disappear and whimpered "report...". He knew true feat that day.

- McKay's sign "REALLY REALLY DANGEROUS, DO NOT TOUCH.". Sheppard 👀... imma touch it

- the way weir grabs Kolya as he presses Rodney against the railing, heavily contemplating throwing him over. She couldn't possibly stop him, but the way she tries and runs to grab him after he's released, so wholesome dude.

- "are you telling me to shut up again?" "Again."

- "turn. around." "You turn around" "what?" "Well if I have to turn around, you should turn around." Sassiest mf alive.

- Bro the final grounding station being sperated and everyone all at once realizing there is only one place to go, the control room. Everyone in the same place, the culmination of the entire ordeal. Have I mentioned how fucking AWESOME the sound track is for this show??? Because DAMN.

- ok Sora pisses me off, but the hallway scene with her and Teyla where she comes at her. Dude the emotion and reckless abandon she has confronting her, it's so good. Plus Tesla's entire lack of fear, she knows she can take this girl down in a heartbeat and she will if she has to, but she doesn't and god that's so badass.

- "you said this would work!" "I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE NOTICED BUT I'M AN EXTREMELY AREOGANT MAN WHO BELIEVES ALL HIS PLANS WILL WORK"

- "I'm not aiming at her" fucking shoots the dude dead on, SUCH A BADASS DUDE.

- the lightning through the halls, the apocalyptic size wave heading for the city, AHHHH (wave is a lil janky looking but still dope)

- "nice work Rodney" "did you ever doubt me?" "Yes, several times"

- man the ancient weapons platform satellite was introduced a lot sooner than I thought! Now I'm sad because I remember that part.

- this episode (12) is both awesome and like, depressing af. Seeing Sheppard go one on one with this wraith who's been trapped on a planet alone thinking only of eating and escaping is so intense. Not to mention the wraith that's just eaten the two scientists he was supposed to protect. I also absolutely love Ridney wanting to go out and help Sheppard despite his background as a scientist and general phobia of... everything combat related. Also can I just say that this episode is HELLA FORESHADOWING (intentional or not) for S5 E19 - Vegas??

- oh hey, it's the bugs from that one SG-1 episode with Cadet Hayley.

- bro Sheppard realizing there could still be a Wraith on board

- the fact that this Wraith was also one who was actively part of the war with the ancients and his last interaction was that of combat, bro is out for bloooood

- watching Sheppard shake tf outta the bandage trying to unravel it only to still slap it on on top of the strap at first. How are we supposed to believe this mf actually tied that onto himself XD (jk John is amazing he can do anything obviously)

- almost blows himself up 2 seconds later

- there's gonna be a post where I talk about the wraith extensively but I have to say that I just love how multidimensional they are. Like the ones without masks aren't just soldiers or mindless drones for their queen, they're smart. Like this wraith is just boping away in the controls of the lantian ship, activating the forecfield, figuring out how to use a human gun. It's horrifying in such a cool way! A monster that gives even adults nightmares that is smart dude, that's so dope.

- I don't think people talk about Rodney witnessing Dr. Gall's death in this episode. I mean that's gotta have fucked him up dude. You can see it in his face afterwards. Then he has to go from that to confronting a wraith that's trying to kill Sheppard and he does. No hesitation he goes out there and opens fire dude.

- ooooo episode 13, the death by fear shit

- I love seeing Rodney in a leadership position. Is he an ass? Yes, but he is genuinely a fantastic leader. I don't think he should run Atlantis or anything, but he's fantastic in a second in command type deal and I love seeing it.

- dude Peterson is THE WORST dude. He's 10000% the mf in a zombie movie who hides a bite. Like I get you're scared but you're endangering literally everyone else.

- seeing the city quarenteen on its own once Peterson gets out of the damaged sensor area is so cool. I know it's all coding and stuff but man do they have a fantastic way of making the city feel alive.

- I don't understand how the red hazmat suits Sheppard and Teyla put on do anything. They're not sealed, like the hood is just kinda slapped on there. Carson's teams suits look sealed but theirs? Idk I wouldn't trust that

- ugh I really do not.like episode 14 y'all. There is literally zero chemistry between the ancient lady and John, it is so forced it's PAINFUL. Also another prime example of how the ancients are massively pompous self important dickheads that caused almost every single massive problem we see in stargate istg. Wraith? Their fault, replicators? Their fault and thus the annihilation of the asgard, their fault. Anubis? ALSO THEIR FAULT. Also probably like a lot more that we don't even know about cuz those fuckers have been meddling with the universe for a long ass time before getting wiped out.

- bro Sheppard believing this random ass person over RODNEY, will never not piss me off. This man has been there for you no matter what and you're not even gonna give him the benefit of the doubt that something is up with this complete stranger??? HE'S ABSLUTELY RIGHT ABOUT HER TOO OFC.

- the way Rodney starts walking towards Sheppard as he runs off to get a jumper. He wanted to go with him so bad 😭

- ok there's gonna be a rant in another post about the ancients rn, I'll put the link here

- "ah, that's what I thought, freezer burn." ABSKDJSKA RODNEY

- 1 x 15 is a pretty meh episode to me overall, but "that's not what happened, not the first time" and the whole flooding scene are pretty damn awesome

- the way I would immediately cry if I got there and realized we were fucking underwater dude, hell no. Then when the flooding started??? I'd have a heart attack before I drowned.

- Rodney staying behind, working until the end, duuuuude 😭

- the fact that Weir chooses the jar Sheppard gave her for her birthday to put her ashes in...

- ep 16 man, the one off insinuation of romance with McKay and the archeologist woman is so weird first of all. Sheppard seems to be the only one who agrees with that (jealous?)

- the other woman with them who rats em out to Kolya, UGH. DUDE.

- Sheppard not wanting to let McKay go alone with Kolya, so cute

- bro poor Carson being tasked to dog fight a damn wraith dart 😭 he's a nervous wreck in the best of days dude

- my question is, how does no one notice the piece that's hiding the last stone in the map? It's clearly a slot, like, come on now.

- Sheppard and Rodney getting side tracked about the Mensa thing, TWICE 😂

- they way Rodney looks to Sheppard after hearing the news of the wraith dark and loss of a jumper and crew. Teyla doesn't, no one else, we're shown Rodney looking to him.

- ok ep 17 is the whole preparing for the hive ships thing, this is leading up to 2 of my absolute favorite episodes (siege 1 and 2)

- they finally fixed Teyla's hair!

- duuuuude, seeing the hive ships for the first time, not to mention the cruisers with them, WOAH. The sheer size and quantity of them.

- watching Ford's video tape knowing what's about to happen in Siege pt 2... ouch.

- Carson losing it trying to tell his mom he misses her 😭 I love that man

- Teyla and Sheppard clashing over their ideals due to their background is so good. I love that they show their different viewpoints, never really pushing for one being right or wrong. Then for them to both have to sit and watch the culling happen before their eyes, a mutual, horrible feeling of helplessness.

- "you didn't say anything that would require security clearance did you?" "Security clearance?" 😂

- Rodney's entire video tape

- Dr. Weir's recordings to inform the families of deceased expedition members 😭

- UGH, KAVANAGH.

- The final snippets of video ahhhhhhhhhh

- SAM

- bro ep 18 is STRESSFUL AF. The revelation about the source of Tesla's powers, the conflict with her and Bates, finding out there's been a god damn WRAITH in the city THE ENTIRE TIME since the dart showed up.

- I know it's a really short scene, but Teyla and Sheppard sparring is still a favorite. It just shows once again how much they truly view eachother as equals, far too often are female teammates viewed as less, weaker, in need of protection. Not these two though, they don't hold back with eachother, they know that the other can take it and they continue to push eachother to be better. I love them so much. Not to mention how much they value the thoughts and opinions of the other.

- Rodney and Teyla running into eachother at Dr. Heightmeyer's office and him immediately making up a ridiculous excuse is so so Rodney.

- Ford making fun of Rodney making a tiny dick joke about him only to be SHUT TF DOWN by Sheppard is so funny

- Teyla being confronted with a fact she's been running from her whole life is so heartbreaking. She's connected to the Wraith, the species who has terrorized and killed her people and countless others throughout the galaxy for thousands and thousands of years.

- getting pretty much confirmation that the wraith created the damn wraith, angerrrrrr

- ok rq, Weir just said that according to the data from the lab, Wraith don't seem to be able to read the minds of humans even though they have a telepathic network, but they can on some level. We saw it in episode 2 when Colonel Sumner is being interrogated by the Wraith. Not only did she kinda read his mind, but she got so inside his head she was able to force him to kneel just using her mind! Maybe this is just cuz she's a queen (it's mentioned in that underwater power rig episode queens are significantly more powerful mentally than other wraith.), but still, it is entirely within their ability to read and influence human minds on some level. Even without the experimental stuff done to Teyla's ancestors.

- what's with everyone getting sedated in these shows

- UGH. BATES MY GUY STOOOOOP.

- I totally get that the Ancients are basically gods to the people of the pegasus galaxy, but Halling expecting the people of Atlantis to risk letting the Wraith get to the Milkyway out of faith? Faith that people who abandoned their galaxy over 10,000 years ago leaving the inhabitants alone to be repeatedly harvested and tormented by creatures they created? After all of that, all the horrors he's seen, the people he's lost and he wants them to risk letting it happen to a whole other galaxy because the Ancients might have a plan??? BRO.

- R "Oh yeah. Yeah that's permanent back damage." Peter "Sorry, I assumed it would come on more slowly." R "Well you assumed with my life." (He's so sassy I love it)

- I love the satellite trio so much, I wish we could've gotten more before... sadness. Also, how TF did Miller snap the pencil that easily???

- PETER NOOOOOO 😭 the way that they say they'll see eachother after the fight is so devastating dude, they're saying it for eachother but they both know he's not making it out of there alive and it breaks. my. heart.

- god, watching the first wraith ship be destroyed, everyone filled with joy and hope that maybe, just maybe they can win this fight. Then the wraith ships start to turn and Peter can't get the satellite back online and they all know exactly what's about to happen. Rodney tries to come back for him anyway but it's too late, it was always going to be too late but it doesn't make watching the satellite be destroyed any less devastating. Not only have they lost the satellite, their only hope, but their friend was on board when it happened and that, that is what kills their hope in that moment.

- new colonel guy irritated the fuck outta me right off the bat. Bro thinks after reading their message and mission reports that he has ANY idea what they're up against and it's bonkers.

- AHHH, the way Sheppard stands with Weir against the Colonel guy cutting her out, I love that man.

- I've been pausing this episode like a billion times because I have so much to write about it, help.

- the fact that Sheppard warns them they should keep some of the proximity warheads in reserve and he doesn't listen... AUGH. He is sooooo gonna regret that later.

- Carson and Rodney bickering will never stop being hilarious

- even tied up, blindfolded, and alone in a Genii facility, Elizabeth stands her ground like a damn badass.

- "yeah well we're building nuclear bombs here, staying awake is a prerequisite." "Snappy." PFFFFT

- poor Rodney man, dude already doesn't sleep enough, but now he's been awake for days already and still running around being the only reason any of these plans have a chance in hell. He needs a nap and a snack asap.

- "So long Rodney" you could write this off as Rodney being the person who happened to be in the room when he decided to man the jumper manually, but I think we all know that's not the case. He's run off in silence without so much of a word to anyone more times than I can count, but Rodney, he has to say goodbye, even if it's a crappy one.

- "You let Sheppard fly that jumper?" God he is so heart broken in this moment, he never had the chance to stop him but Elizabeth, she has the opportunity and she didn't. I don't think he ever could've truly forgiven her for that if he'd died.

- GOD DAMN I FORGOT THIS WAS A 3 PARTER.

- Rodney dropping the clip PFFFFFT

- Ford... his storyline makes me so sad, especially in this episode. The character we love so dearly, this boy who has seen war and conflict and violence and is still so full of joy and love loses himself before our very eyes. Before the eyes of his friends and there's nothing they can do to stop it.

- THE MUSHROOM CLOUD GOD DAMN

- "why are you whispering?" "I dont know, just seemed like the right thing to do."

- god the siege episodes are so good, if you wanna hear about my ramblings in more detail I'll link that post once it's made here.

- this is getting long af so each season will have it's own post

Season 2

[salchat]

I went to Basingstoke Comic Con last Friday with my son Gregory - following a break in my chemo schedule due to emergency surgery resulting in fewer inside bits and an ileostomy. I'd thought I wouldn't be able to go - and it wasn’t easy, but I did it anyway.

Here’s what happened:

First I had my photo with Rachel Luttrell who was lovely and liked my feltie Teyla:

Then my son took the role of photographer for me in my Impala cosplay with Baby herself (or one of them)!

Then there were some strange clashes in the schedule - Stargate Q and A sessions when the Stargate guests were supposed to be signing autographs, so we weren’t sure who was going to turn up or how to be in two places at once.  But in the end, it worked to our advantage, because nobody else was sure either, and so when Joe and Rachel came along, there was hardly anyone else there so we got more time and more conversation than we would have.

Joe remembered me from the Wales Comic Con in 2021, which I definitely wasn’t expecting and he said he still had the little book of drawings I gave him there!  (It was a ridiculously stuffed little book - I’d gone way overboard.)  He took a photo of my art and put it on his Instagram!

Then we went to Rachel’s table and she was really nice and liked my art and gave me her phone to put my Instagram name in.  There was no one else at Joe’s table at that point so he was wandering about behind her and it was lovely just to see them interact as friends!

We managed to get Gary Jones next, who was really funny.  I told him it was my son’s first Comic Con and he shook Gregory’s hand.  But then he said, ‘No, that’s no good,’ and got up, came around the table and proceeded to give Gregs a lesson in firm handshakes.  It was hilarious!

I’d wanted to draw all the guests but just didn’t have time, with all the chemo and being in hospital shenanigans, so had to use the photos provided, which were nice, if not the same.

Next, after some hanging around and listening to the Q and As (which were all really good and Michael Shanks just kept spinning on his stool and being really silly) we got Paul McGillion and Rainbow Sun Francks.  They were both really lovely and nice to Gregory and, again, there were no queues so we had plenty of time!

Then we hit a bit of a hurdle because the day (and my energy) was running out and it didn’t look like Ben Browder or Michael Shanks were coming back.  Michael had a private Meet and Greet going on but Gregs really wanted to meet him, in particular because he wanted to introduce his homemade Goa’uld.

But then somehow we ended up in an impromptu session in the hotel bar - just a handful of con-goers with Ben and Paul and Rainbow! And Paul came up to me and told me how much he liked my art, because a friend had brought one of my pictures to be signed and pointed me out! And then I got to sit down opposite Ben and have a little chat and he signed my art.

But we still hadn't got Michael Shanks. So I pestered various organisers until I found one who knew what to do. And she got us in on the end of his Meet and Greet and then when the meet-and-greeters had gone we had a little private session where he, predictably, attacked himself with Gregory's Goa'uld and then signed my art and then before he went (blush - hides behind hands) I got a kiss on the cheek! 🥰

So, a memorable day! And then we had the fun of trekking home from Basingstoke, through London, on costume, me in my Impala outfit and Gregs as my little Gate-mission-ready military escort. We should just dress like that all the time...

I hope you liked my little Con Diary, @massharp1971 and @colonelshepparrrrd and anyone else who's interested!

Thanks to @hermscat for getting me an extra key card for her hotel room so I could flake out when needed and for transporting us to the station!

[aintgonnatakethis]

9 people you want to know better tag game

Thank you @bagheerita for the tag! ❤️️ Template is at the bottom below the cut.

Three ships: Young/Telford/Rush from SGU. I won't, but I could include other combinations of them and totally cheat this question - these three are the characters that just click with you, that will stick with you for your entire life.

John/Scorpius from Farscape. Me as a wide-eyed 7 year old watching a torturer clad in a leather suit come on screen: 😮😮😮

Sheppard/Todd from SGA. It's not always monsterfucking with them, but when it is... Oh boy! 👀

First ship: Third Doctor/Delgado Master from classic Doctor Who. My mum was involved in the convention scene back then so I grew up surrounded by it and we had a massive wall of every story that had been released on DVD. I hope they all made the move with us. I remember being a young kid and her bringing down a boxset with the faces of the first 7 Doctors; I'd point to one of them and she'd pick us an episode of theirs for us to watch. (Simpler times but not really)

Last song: Currently listening to Hell As Well by We Three, a band I found through @frostysfrenzy. My best songs playlist has 140 songs if you want to know my music taste without being overwhelmed.

Last movie: The Road. I saw a meme that had been made for it on here and remembered it being an excellent book, so gave it a shot. It was better in book form unfortunately. I remember it was the first time I'd seen the sentence structure of 'this happened and this happened and this happened' outside of "bad" or "childish" writing. How it was used to successfully show someone's declining mental and physical state has stuck with me.

Currently watching: Rewatching Being Human (US version) and Firefly. Trying not to let unpleasant people being involved (Mark Pellegrino and Joss Whedon respectively) ruin things I've long-term loved. So I'll engage as long as I'm not providing them financial/social/political influence to harm others. Yes, I am looking at people who still pay for Harry Potter merch.

Currently reading: Here, have a google drive full of SG1 and SGA books. I can't remember which blog linked it originally, but I'm on book 6 of the SGA Legacy series, which is basically the plot of season 6 if they'd been renewed. (Though I do side-eye some things in there, like Sheppard instantly getting together with Teyla and there being a hint to Keller being abusive in her relationship with Rodney. I don't think they would have done the former on TV as even though Teyla isn't military she's still under Sheppard's command so it would reflect poorly on the real life US military - which is the only reason O'Neill and Carter didn't get together properly, if I'm remembering right? The latter... I've seen too much of Keller bashing in fandom. I don't need it in my "official" content too.)

Currently eating: I just finished some garlic and chilly chicken drumsticks and rice. I've been eating good since my boyfriend got into cooking. 😁

Currently craving: Hmm... I think I'm good. Full of food and an extra of my ADHD meds because I'm running on night-mode currently, meaning I'd be going to bed around 6-7am except I need a doctor's appointment so I'm gonna have to stay up and tough it out. Took it at 11pm so should have worn off enough for me to sleep after my appointment. (While the able-to-focus effect only last 8 hours, the you-will-stay-awake part persists for 12. 🙄)

Tagging: @frostysfrenzy @autism-purgatory @froggy-pposto @paeliae-occasionally @the-golden-comet

@dream-i-die @gioiaalbanoart @wyked-ao3 @worlds-tallest-fairy @chaniis-atlantis

Template:

Three ships: 

First ship:

Last song: 

Last movie: 

Currently watching: 

Currently reading: 

Currently eating: 

Currently craving:

[autistic-crypt1d]

My favorite SGA episodes:

S1 E10 & 11 - The Storm & The Eye

Bro this episode is so cool I cannot even begin to describe it anyway other than AJSNDJSKSKFJ. First of all THE DRAMA, I mean, the way they set the scenery up for these episodes is so good. The coming storm, the wind picking up, the crashing waves, empty city. The bacon conversation between the 2 guards right before the Genii come in is hilarious and I love it. The fact that Sheppard is left as the sole person who can retake Atlantis and save Rodney and Elizabeth is so intense. The way Rodney and him work so seamlessly even while entirely separated is just beautiful, I mean, he immediately knows he somehow has to warn Sheppard of what they're after. The way he slickly leans on the intercom knowing Sheppard will take care of it, AHHH. Not only is every single scene of Sheppard running around sabotaging shit and taking out the Genii who come after him absolutely enthralling, but the emotion he displays when Kolya tells him he's killed Elizabeth, the rage. I cannot get over him yelling over the walkie, completely ignoring the torrential amounts of rain and wind bombarding him. He is a badass and everyone knows it.

I'm just constantly in love with the moments where we're shown just how brave and selfless Rodney is capable of being, how he really is inside. I mean, dude stands between Kolya with his gun, a man he knows will kill, and Elizabeth, AHHH. Not to mention, he's always hilarious even in these situations I mean, "Oh would you look at this?! That is just never gonna be useful again!" (And Sheppard knowing that he was absolutely gonna whine about that). Rodney is a drama queen through and through but I love him.

I also thoroughly love the fact that Rodney put up that danger sign and Sheppard is just like "yup, that'll work".

Rodney's arrogance in the face of danger is always so entertaining, but what I love more is how his team members are always the ones trying desperately to get the person like 2 seconds away form murdering him, not to. Like the way Elizabeth, this tiny woman, grabs onto Kolya as he's about to throw McKay off the platform while he's continuing to sass him is so funny. Then it's immediately wholesome as she runs over to him after he's released.

Teyla, Carson (poor Carson), and Ford all meet up with Sheppard just in time for the last grounding rod to be separated and everyone on Atlantis realizing there's only one place to go and everyone, both sides are going to be there, THE INTENSITY DUDE.

I'm not a fan of Sora, but I have to say, the hallway scene when she confronts Teyla, WOW. I mean the intensity of emotion she displays, the blind anger??? That combined with the fact that Teyla doesn't blink an eye once. She knows she can take her down if she has to, but she doesn't and that is what is so badass. Her priority getting Carson to safety, she has nothing to prove to Sora.

And finally, the gate scene where the Genii evacuate and only Kolya is left standing in front of the portal, Dr. Weir held as a human shield. Kolya makes one fatal mistake, thinking that John Sheppard would miss. He takes him out (temporarily unfortunately), releasing Elizabeth, Teyla and Carson get to safety, and Rodney fuckin McKay saves the day in spectacular fashion as always. A beautiful, absolutely thrilling set of episodes.

S1 E19 & 20 / S2 E1 - Siege pt. 1, 2 & 3

Part one is heartbreaking, I mean we start off so hopeful with the discovery of the satellite. They've done the recon, they know what's coming and when and the satellite is in the perfect position and best of all, the wraith think it's still broken. Everything is coming together, right up until the point Peter gets stuck on the station, there's no time left and they all know it. Even in the way they say they'll see eachother afterwards, they know that's not true. Peter knows he is about to die and he goes to work anyway and he takes out a hive ship. This is a moment of pure joy and hope for everyone, they actually destroyed a hive ship. There's hope again, hope that they can actually win this fight, but it's short lived. The satellite malfunctions, the circuits overloaded and it can't fire again. Rodney tries to come back for him but it's too late, the hive ships know that he's there. It was always going to be too late but that doesn't ease the devastation of watching the satellite be destroyed. It doesn't ease the loss of their friend. Rodney relays this information to Atlantis and the loss of the satellite is devastating, but finding out Peter was aboard, that is what killed their hope. Not to mention that while all of this is happening, back on Atlantis Bates has been attacked and people suspect Teyla due to an earlier altercation. We find out that there's a Wraith in the city and he's been there since the dart incident episodes ago doing god knows what. They're about to be in an all out war and the enemy is already inside. The interrogation provides nothing, as we know of wraith, they fear nothing. Never in the history of this show do we see a wraith beg for their life, no, they smile. They smile because they have no doubt in their minds they will be avenged, that the people who killed them will be fed upon by their brethren soon enough.

Part 2 is in one word, intense. The hive ships are still on the way, slower, but none the less inevitable. They've lost their only weapon against the incoming armada and they're faced with the reality they have to evacuate the only place capable of returning them to the milkyway, and destroy centuries of data. Then, just as they're dialing the alpha site, they get an incoming wormhole. Earth has sent help. The colonel guy bugs the shit out of me but the plan is good. The daedalus is on it's way with a new ZPM, 4 days, that's how long they have to hold out. The way Sheppard stands up for Weir to the Colonel is beautiful, they have their moments butting heads but he respects her and he'll be damned if she gets cut out of this. Now, with military and volunteering personnel recalled back to Atlantis the preparation begins, the city and its citizens being decked out in artillery. Hope is once again starting to appear, but no one is sure how this will turn out, they know what's coming for them but every single person is ready to try. 4 days alone against the armada. They've deployed the mines and initialized the chair but my god does it ever go wrong. They find out there are only a few dozen drones left, presumably depleted from the original war on atlantis, and now the mines are in danger. The Wraith have sent asteroids hurtling towards the atmosphere, taking all of them out in one fail swoop. Not only have they lost their first line of defense, but the radiation is blocking their sensors, they're blind. Now if only someone suggested they keep some of the mines (oh wait SHEPPARD DID). Now it's revealed that Colonel Sumner was a friend of Colonel Everett's and he is pissed at Sheppard. We know, and Sheppard knows that he did the best he could that day. Killing Sumner was the most merciful thing he could've done in that's situation and as much as I dislike Everett, the way he finds out how true that is, is awful. The moment of truth arrives, a wave of darts in inbound and the great city of Atlantis goes dark. The only light being that of the moon and artillery from both sides. Amidst it all McKay and Sheppard are together as always, trying to get the chair online as darts make runs at the city. For the first time Everett starts to get a glimpse at what he's up against as an entire group of his soldiers are taken by a wraith beam, no way to fight back, just gone. The first wave of darts is defeated, they've survived the night but it is far from over. The hive ships are still on their way and there are wraith in the city. Both Athosian and Expedition members alike begin searching the city while Rodney and Zelenka attempt to retrofit the puddle jumpers to be driven by the chair. The only way for this plan to succeed is for Elizabeth to broker a deal with the Genii for a Nuke. She of course succeeds because she's a badass, and another plan is officially on its way, BUT, another problem, the devices are incomplete. The next wave of darts is here and the jumpers aren't ready. "So long Rodney" you could write this off as Rodney being the person who happened to be in the room when he decided to man the jumper manually, but I think we all know that's not the case. He's run off in silence without so much of a word to anyone more times than I can count, but Rodney, he has to say goodbye, even if it's a crappy one. Now we see Colonel Everett backed into the corner, alone with a Wraith. He shoots, but it doesn't stop, it keeps walking towards him and you can see the look on his face change as he fires round after round into it. He knows he's about to die, and he's terrified because he knows how it's going to happen. More and more wraith are entering the city in numbers they can't hope to defend against. "You let Sheppard fly that jumper?" God he is so heart broken in this moment, he never had the chance to stop him but Elizabeth, she had the opportunity and she didn't. I don't think he ever could've truly forgiven her for that if he'd died.

Part 3 is the culmination of everything so far, the wraith are not just at the doorstep they are inside the home, they have surrounded the house and there is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Everything they have tried has only prolonged their deaths and Sheppard is on his way to take a hive ship out with him. At the last second he's saved by the Daedalus, but Ford is not so lucky. His squad is cornered by wraith and with his final breath, one of the soldiers let's go of a grenade. Ford and the wraith that had latched on to feed are sent hurtling over the railing into the ocean below. The daedalus brings a moment of relief to the expedition as it prepares to join the fight. They take on the final hive ship as darts continue to bombard the city, this fight isn't over yet. We find out that Everett has been saved by one of his downed squad members, but he is not unscathed. The daedalus takes put the final hive ship with a beamed nuke, but they're not done yet. The darts get in formation and take a ballistic approach towards the city in a last ditch effort. Rodney and Teyla manage to get the ZPM safely to the gate room only for McKay to forget how they work and almost get them killed. Once all is said and done Atlantis survives another day and all that's left is to clear out the rest if the wraith in the city. Now is when we find out just how bad Everett's status is. He's aged significantly, leaving him bedbound and ill. His new understanding of what happened to Colonel Sumner leads him to apologize to Sheppard for his accusations. There is no break as we find the condition of Ford, a wraith attached to his chest, both having been floating in the cold ocean for hours. This has been days of constant activity and it's still not over. The cruisers that fled brought reinforcements, 12 hive ships headed straight for Atlantis and they'll be there in a little over a day. Sheppard decides they should go on the offensive, attack them before they get there and they do. They manage to nuke 2 ships but then we see a perfect example of the level of intelligence the wraith possess. They manage to enact counter measures in a matter of minutes to prevent them from beaming the nukes aboard. The daedalus has no choice, they have to retreat. Ford... his storyline makes me so sad, especially in this episode. The character we love so dearly, this boy who has seen war and conflict and violence and is still so full of joy and love loses himself before our very eyes. Before the eyes of his friends and there's nothing they can do to stop it. He attacks his friends, his fellow soldiers and he can't stop. He's lost all control over himself and it's heartbreaking. Amidst all of that, the hive ships have arrived and they've gathered in formation over Atlantis and have begun to fire. This is a horrifying glimpse into what the war 10,000 years ago must have been like. The amount of firepower being exerted on the shields will deplete the ZPM within days, the ancients had 3 but that's not much more time. Sheppard comes up with the idea to cloak the city and Rodney executes it perfectly, faking their deaths to the wraith and all others. Truly, truly an incredible series of episodes.

S2 E13 - Critical Mass

A Goa'uld infiltrates Atlantis planting a bomb somewhere in the city (or at least they think so). This episode gets so wild, interrogations, suspicion, fear, a race against the clock and the entire episode is just so enthralling. Plus we get a hint of how the Goa'uld fear the possibility of wraith getting to the milkyway (I'm going to do a post about the stack up between Wraith and Goa'uld in a fight here if you're curious as to my thoughts on that)

They manage to relay the message to the Daedalus and then to Atlantis in time but "there's a bomb in Atlantis that'll be triggered by dialing Earth" is not super helpful.

They remove the ZPM but once the virus program realizes the gate is no longer an option if forces their hand by calling the wraith. If they don't connect it again, the wraith will destroy them, if they do, the program will overload the ZPM and destroy them. The hunt for the spy in their ranks is so intense, Kavanagh is almost tortured, the city is about to be destroyed. This all culminates to them finally finding the spy, but it's not a human spy, there's a Goa'uld inside Caldwell! Ronon has to absolutely wail on him, then he gets tazed by Sheppard until the symbiote is hurt enough for Caldwell to break through and give them the code. It's so intense and I love it.

S3 E4 - Sateda

Now this episode is amazing, it's a combination of heartwrenching and completely badass. The team comes across a village Ronon stumbled across during his years as a Runner and as a result it was culled. The villagers recognize him and they're captured (Rodney escaping with an arrow in his ass). Ronon manages to bargain for Sheppard and Teyla's freedom, but they're unable to return fast enough to prevent the wraith from capturing him and wiping out the village.

The wraith makes Ronon a runner once again, but they take out the gate. They won't let him leave alive this time. Now Ronon is faced not only with the threat of basically endless waves of wraith coming to kill him, but also the memories of his home world where they've dropped him. For the first time we see glimpses of what Sateda used to be like, what his life here was like. It's such a heartwrenching experience to see him fighting for his life while remembering the destruction of his previous life at the hands of the very wraith who did it. I mean god, watching him come across the bodies of his fellow soldiers and be forced to strip them of their armour and weapons just to survive...

We never find out much about the other runners aside from Kiryk, but even then we don't find out much. I find it hard to imagine a runner surviving longer than Ronon had honestly, and I believe that's why the wraith that made him one wants him so badly. It's a point if pride at this point, he's evaded them for years slaughtering the wraith who've come after him.

Seeing Ronon try and fail to convince his wife to leave is devastating. She couldn't bear to leave the people who needed her behind even knowing none of them would survive. To make matters worse, we see him watch her die right in front of his eyes. The scenes where he's taking out the shrapnel and remembering her death brings me to tears every time.

The way Ronon immediately slumps down onto the ground once he realizes Sheppard and the team have come for him is just so AHH!

S4 E17 - Midway

This episode is so damn good, first off I mean, we get the absolute treat that is Teal'c and I'm THRILLED. Not to mention we get to see him AND Ronon together and that is just a trip. Teal'c matches his energy and holds his ground and I love him. Ronon is very off putting to pretty much anyone whose not his team or someone he isn't comfy with yet. This is very apparent many times and his meeting Teal'c is no exception. He's immediately threatening and guarded, but does this throw Teal'c off? Hell no!

These two have clashed the entire time so far and now it's time to go back to Earth. There's of course the 24 hour hold on the midway station, nothing too crazy right? WRONG, the wraith show up! Now all that's standing between Earth and a wraith take over is Ronon and Teal'c. These two are undeniable badasses and forces of nature and we get to see that front and center here and I love it. I mean, these two entirely on their own, take out all the wraith that stormed the SGC. That's a lot of wraith!! Not to mention they're awesome as hell while doing it. I just love this episode a lot and I love Teal'c and Ronon a lot. Also, the least irritaing/infuriating episode with Kavanagh in it.

S5 E10 & 11 - First Contact & The Lost Tribe

I love this episode so much. Right off the bat we get Daniel again. Love that mf. There are also 2 intense ass plotlines happening simultaneously here with Daniel and Rodney being kidnapped by rogue Asguard (like, holy shit), and then the activation of the Attero device causing Todd to panic and take over the Daedalus leaving Keller and Ronon to try and take it back!

Ok so we've got Daniel and Rodney discovering the ancient lab, being the hilarious duo that they are. Everything is fine until this strange ship shows up. Not only is this a ship that they've never seen before, but it completely bypasses Atlantis's shields. Then we see 3 suited up aliens leap from the ship onto the tower. Fall damage? Never heard of it. These things completely ignore the strike team Sheppard and Teyla lead, taking some sort of device straight through the floors of the tower while getting shot at. They head straight for Daniel and Rodney and there is no hesitation and no stopping them. One of them sacrifices itself to shield the other 2 while they get away with Rodney, Daniel, and the device and it's over before they even know what's happened.

Now we get Keller and Ronon alone on the Daedalus as Todd has knocked out the bridge crew. It's up to them now to regain control as wraith beam aboard.

Part 2 starts off wild with the Daedalus taken over and the stargate exploding in the control room with Sheppard and Radek inside. Now both groups have realized what this device is doing and are trying to fix it before millions die, problem is, Todd wants to destroy the facility with Daniel and Rodney still inside so Sheppard and Zelenka along with the Traveler ship are trying to beat them there! Meanwhile Daniel is discovering that they're being held captive by Asgard. This is mindblowing because so far we've seen zero evidence of them in the Pegasus galaxy and now we find out that they've been hiding out here for a long ass time. We also find out that they have been conducting experiments on humans like Loki did and have sorta stabilized their cloning defects.

The fact that they came to the Pegasus Galaxy and took advantage of the war in order to hide and experiment and did nothing to help the Ancients win makes me so mad. What if they could've won with their help?

My god the tension at the end portion of this episode is wild!!! The Daedalus has been retaken but it's on a collision course with the facility, Sheppard and the Traveler ship arrived but their drive is burned out, the Asgard have left the facility, but they took the control device with them leaving Daniel and Rodney with no way to shut it down. Rodney of course figures out another way, but that means going inside the chamber that is currently full of volatile lighting.

They of course succeed and in such a fantastical way with the Traveler ship opening a hyperspace window to travel through the planet with the Daedalus and Daniel almost dying while they shut off the device.

Overall, I love these episodes so much, the intensity, the sass between Daniel and Rodney, it's so good.

S5 E14 - The Prodigal

This episode is so intense and just awesome in general. Atlantis is under siege from Michael and his hybrids, Teyla and her baby have been taken captive, and everyone but Ronon and some gate room personnel are trapped outside this stun bubble thing. Sheppard, Rodney, and Zelenka immediately get to work and as soon as Ronon is awake he starts formulating a plan. The fight scene between Ronon and Michael is amazing as always, not to mention him yelling for Teyla to run and being the reason she's able to get her and her baby to safety before he gets hurled over the railing. That man can take a beating god damn. Sheppard and Rodney quickly get to work trying to shut down the stun bubble but Michael starts the self destruct timer, expediting their timeline. Teyla's escape is fantastic I mean the stress you can see on her face is so amazing, she's a fighter and always has been but she has to get her baby out of there, she has to leave Ronon to fight Michael by himself and it's killing her. Once they finally do shut it down (avoiding Sheppard's suicide run), they can finally storm the gate room. Michael makes a run for it but Sheppard is so not letting that happen, the jumper bay doors are closed, the gate room is retaken, there's nowhere for him to run anymore. They end up on this balcony and it's one of my favorite fight scenes of all time, the moonlight, the height, the batman like scenery, fists flying, it's so intense. We've been waiting for this moment for so long, the final confrontation and BOOM, Teyla enters. Her face is stoic, she is determined and no one will stop her, he will not get away this time. She lands every hit with no mercy and when he finally topples over the edge, gripping on only by his fingertips, she kicks him off. It's so intense and such a fitting end to his storyline in my opinion, for it to end in Atlantis where it started and to be ended by Teyla.

S5 E20 - Enemy at the Gate

Ah the finale of Stargate Atlantis. I'm really sad the show ended prematurely but this episode is still amazing. Not only has a hive ship started to successfully integrate a ZPM into it (a feat which if fully completed, would make it virtually impenetrable), but because of their new advanced sensors they've also picked up the signal with Earth's location from the alternate reality. Now there's an incredibly advanced hive ship on it's way to Atlantis and 2 ships have already failed to stop it. It's up to Atlantis to save Earth and the Milly way now. Sheppard is sent to Earth ahead to operate the chair in case they don't make it in time but that communique also contained the location of the chair and they immediately destroy it. Earth is defenseless so Sheppard takes a suicide run at the hive (again), only to be saved by Rodney, Teyla, Ronon, and Lorne gating aboard from a stalled Atlantis. They all make it out alive (although Ronon did briefly die and I cried), thanks to the spectacular arrival of Atlantis via the wormhole drive. They buy enough time in a fantastical battle above Earth for them to escape and the hive is destroyed. The scene of Atlantis on Earth is so beautiful and the whole main cast on the balcony, just fantastic.

If you can't tell, I love this show so much and if for some reason you're seeing this and haven't watched it yet, please do, it's amazing.

[sga-owns-my-soul]

Hello my lovely! 😊 I've popped back in with another ask of my random atlantis thoughts as I'm going through my rewatch

Idk if it's ever said outright, but I'm pretty sure Teyla is the first friend John's ever had who's been pregnant. Like, he DOES NOT know what to do with her and he's overly protective (which is very sweet but clearly irritating for Teyla)

Bro is TERRIFIED because she's his family! And her baby is his family!! Especially considering the guilt he feels about losing Elizabeth and Carson, of course he's going to be fiercely protective of her!!😭

Sidenote: Ronon found her exercising and she was worried that she wouldn't be able to "keep up" with the rest of the team once the baby was born if she didn't and his response was literally "Who says you have to keep up?" that just 🥺 Literally saying they're going to take care of her no matter what. They're so family I can't 😭😭

john sheppard is afraid of clowns, iratus bugs, and pregnant women and that is fucking canon to me. that man would rather SCALE THE FUCKING TOWER than be around a pregnant woman and i for one think that's fucking hilarious

ALSO i know it was like. Huge Asshole Energy when john grounded teyla from missions but like. all i can think about is how john places the responsibility to keep his team safe 100% on his own shoulders, and i FULLY believe that his team (which is strongest for AR-1 but obviously extends to the whole city) includes the athosians, and by this point they've gone missing, and i really do think john believes he's to blame for it. i think johns harsh reaction was purely fear based- teyla's baby, who very well could end up being the Last Athosian, is at risk because they got shot by stunners. not only is john feeling the guilt from teyla getting stunned, but he now thinks he's putting her baby at risk. of course he freaks out!!!!!! he JUST found out about torren and in the same breath finds out he might've led teyla into a situation where she could lose her baby???????? anyways this was a lot to say yes john 100% sees teyla and torren as family and is SO overprotective of both of them.

also i'm literally never over teyla and ronon's friendship, i LOVE how ronon pivots between beating the shit out of teyla because he knows she'll give it as good as she gets and being the softest most tender soul with her. like the scene where they find out and he holds her hand and congratulates her and asks about kanan 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 IM GONNA SOB AT WORK THEYRE SO god i fucking love teyla and ronon's friendship it's SO fucking good

also you didn't mention this but i'm incapable of talking about teyla's pregnancy without commenting on how obsessed i am with the fact that rodney is the one who delivered her baby. like. i just. it's everything to me i genuinely think it's my favourite thing to happen in the entire show it was the BEST possible decision for the writers to make and i love it it's my favourite thing and i like to think rodney has a special bond with torren bc of it

thank you for the team feels they're Everything

[smowkie]

finished the first bingo card for the summer from @ficreadingchallenge! thank you for such a fun challenge ❤️

list of fics under the cut

1. fluff

A Handful of Halloweens by WonkyElk

McShep, SGA, 2,592 w, teen

summary:

John and Rodney share a few Halloweens.

2. rec'd by a friend - thanks, @novemberhush ❤️

Warmth by bccalling

Buddie, 911, 699 w, gen

summary:

A tiny little fluffy snapshot of a Buckley-Diaz family camping trip and a chilly night out by the campfire.

3. superpowers / no powers au

Superteam! series by WonkyElk

McShep, SGA, 16,784 w, teen

summary of part 1, We’ll Name It Later:

“So, all four of them …” she indicated the members of her premier Gate team, all currently cuddled up asleep in infirmary beds and looking so peaceful and cute and so painfully vulnerable, that she almost wanted to slip them each a snuggly teddy bear, against bad dreams, “have, in entirely separate incidents, each somehow acquired a superpower?” Carson shrugged helplessly at her. “It’s been a really weird day.”

4. rarepair

One Functioning Human by TwoTales

ZelenKay, SGA, 848 w, teen

summary:

“You just had to touch the fucking plant, Radek.” Radek’s eyes stung, his ears ringing. Tears tracked down his cheeks as he lay on the ground. “Do not talk, it hurts too much.” Radek opened his eyes and peered over at him. Rodney’s closed eyelids and the skin around was hot pink, his face wet with tears and snot as he wheezed.

5. long fic (>25000 words)

Everything Changes (And You Gotta Be Ready) by Temaris

McShep, SGA, Doctor Who, Torchwood, 25,083 w, teen

summary:

When Sheppard is lost between Gates, McKay moves heaven and earth to get him back.

6. found family

He's Ours by Brumeier

SGA, 929 w, teen

summary:

LJ Comment Fic for Scary Wednesday prompt: Any, Any Character(s), fear of intimacy In which John learns that his fear of intimacy has been subverted, when he wasn't paying attention.

7. newest fic in the tag of your choice - #Twenty Years Later

wrong side up by dedkake

SGA, 2,800 w, gen

summary:

“Colonel,” Teyla says, stopping him outside the gathering tent with a hand on his elbow. She searches his face for a moment, her smile softening at whatever she sees. “Please consider what he has to say before you respond. This opportunity—I think it is what we have all been waiting for.” or, things are coming together for this alternate timeline.

8. fic from your first fandom

Reunion by JaneDavitt

Wincest, Supernatural, 342 w, mature

summary:

Dean's taking a much-needed shower and Sam's remembering too much. Credited as the first Supernatural fic, and so the first Dean/Sam fic too, which is something I only discovered much later.

9. inspired by another fanwork - inspired by 12. de-aging / kidfic What Happens in the Clubhouse by skoosiepants

The Knights of the Pegasus Galaxy vs. the Chicken Pox by DevilDoll

McShep, SGA, 5,906 w, teen

summary:

After the worst was over, having space chicken pox was kind of awesome. A Clubhouse universe story.

10. didn't know they were dating

it started out with a kiss by beckybegins (QueenTheatrics)

Buddie, 911, 5,457 w, teen

summary:

It’s a normal day when Eddie decides he’s going to blow up his life. OR The fic where Eddie kisses Buck, panics, and speed runs a relationship.

11. gift giving

like a freight train by dedkake

McShep, SGA, 536 w, gen

summary:

It could've started before the storm. or, Rodney's in panic-mode and John interrupts.

12. de-aging / kidfic

What Happens in the Clubhouse by skoosiepants

McShep, SGA, 5,981 w, teen

summary:

Right, yes, because traveling through the eleven miles of forest between here and the 'gate will be a piece of cake when we're roughly the size of dwarves, with all the strength of a bundle of sticks!"

free space

Cake or Death by Brumeier

McShep, SGA, 2,494 w, teen

summary:

It was just a piece of cake, but for Rodney it was far more dangerous.

13. BIPOC main character

Pegasus Miracles series by A_Storm_of_Roses

Aiden/Ronon, SGA, 8,445 w, explicit

summary of part 1, Pegasus Miracles:

After 6 years, dozens of planets, and countless dead Wraith, Aiden Ford returns - quieter, lonelier, and unsure. After 7 years as a Runner, Ronon thinks he might just understand. Or Aiden and Ronon get the happy ending they both deserve.

14. enemies to friends / lovers

Hope by badly_knitted

Teal'c & SG-1, SG1, 405 w, gen

summary:

When Teal'c meets the strangers, he feels the first real stirrings of hope for his people.

15. magic

Achilles’ Heel by WonkyElk

McShep, SGA, 8,495 w, teen

summary:

He’d learned a few things over the past six months. How far dragonfire could reach and how it cooked you so fast, you were dead before you finished screaming. How the claws and beak of a griffin tore through flesh like it was the smoothest of butter. Most of all, he learned that life would be a whole lot more bearable if he could manage not to care.

16. space AU

Following the Stars to Home by WonkyElk

McShep, SGA, 16,197 w, mature

summary:

He was almost out of the landing zone, when a murmur of rippling excitement caused him to look back. Apparently, the Rusty Bucket - or whatever it was called - wasn’t the only ship to have picked today to visit the dullest planet in the known universe.

17. hurt / comfort

Distraction by laceymcbain

McShep, SGA, 9,064 w, mature

summary:

“Have you tried ear plugs?” Rodney asks. “It’s in my head, Rodney. Ear plugs don’t do a lot when the voices are inside your brain!”

18. gen fic

Reckoning by tacit

SGA, 5,375 w, teen

summary:

Written December 2007 for the SGA H/C secret santa. Everybetty requested gen Shepwhump featuring Beckett, that didn't skip over the medical details. This is what came out. Nb: At the end of The Defiant One, McKay nods to Sheppard's gun shot wound and asks if Sheppard's okay. Sheppards replies, "Other than this and a few cracked ribs," which seemed eye-rollingly over-stoic, to me. I've taken a bit of poetic license with the severity of Sheppard's injuries.

19. werewolf AU

when the autumn moon is bright by callunavulgari

McShep, SGA, 2,881 w, teen

summary:

There weren’t, strictly speaking, supposed to be wolves in Atlantis.

20. secret relationship

Magic Marker by trinityofone

McShep, SGA, 1,711 w, teen

summary:

John’s eyes were wide with horror. “You’re telling me that I walked around all day with ‘Property of Dr. Rodney McKay’ written on my ass?”

20. secret relationship - again, i couldn't decide which to use, so you get both

Jane Wyatt did it first by mayachain

McShep, SGA, 243 w, gen

summary:

It's not that they're being subtle, exactly.

21. under the influence

Deep Space Malady by LogicGunn

McShep, SGA, 3,332 w, teen

summary:

Rodney swears when the extension in his assigned room rings at stupid o’clock in the morning, waking him up from a deep sleep (and pleasant dreams about messy-haired Colonels) barely half an hour after his head had hit the pillow. He fumbles for the receiver in the dark and hisses at whoever is at the other end of the line.

22. new (to you) fandom

Crossing the Line by Zilentdreamer

Rysposito, Castle, 2,311 w, teen

summary:

There is a line that divides us from want we want. Sometimes we don't even realize its starting to blur until its gone.

23. video edit / fanmix

Run Baby Run by randommindtime

McShep, SGA

24. epistolary

Beach Real Estate by ficontessa

McShep, SGA, 3,405 w, gen

summary:

If you're going to go all in on wacky AUs, why NOT one where John is a beach realtor? This is ridiculous and I'm not even sorry.

[dr-futbol-blog]

The Defiant One, Pt. 1

I've thought about where I would have placed 38 Minutes (S01E04) that seemed to fit ill so early in the season, and I think it would have made the most sense between the mid-season two-parter and The Defiant One (S01E12), discussed here.

The Genii siege visibly changes something between Sheppard and McKay, and we get to resolve that a little too fast in this episode that follows directly after. 38 Minutes has that strange almost-confession to Weir,* which would have made more sense here as Weir and Sheppard seem to grow closer at the end of The Eye (S01E11) although, I argue, it is precisely because Sheppard needed to create distance between himself and McKay that they did. He was using Weir to create distance, in effect hiding behind her, because Kolya figured out after like a minute of talking to Sheppard that McKay was the best way of getting to him. Sheppard was reminded of the fact that being important to him put McKay in mortal danger.

In 38 Minutes, we also have Sheppard's own near death experience and everyone working so very hard to save him, McKay worrying so much about him, the way that they look at each other, that something unspoken lingering between them, McKay's agitation over what ever Sheppard wanted to tell Weir; all of that would have made sense between these two episodes. The Iratus bug could have symbolized Sheppard's internal anguish: the way he's in agony at first and then the pain gets so bad that he gets numb and loses all feeling. It all would have made so much sense.

But regardless, we start the episode with a driving flying lesson (which, incidentally, also would have made the most sense following the events where both Sheppard and the other designated pilot were incapacitated at the same time). McKay received the ATA gene therapy and Sheppard is teaching him how to fly the puddle jumper. Where the previous episode ended with Sheppard very clearly wanting to create distance between them, here they are all cozy with each other again. Or s it seems.

Clearly, this is important. As mentioned previously, they need more pilots since there are few people with the ATA gene (two that we know have the real gene, a few others through gene therapy), and only a fraction of them know how to fly. It's important not only for the mission and taking the pressure off the commander having to do transport flights, it's also important for the team to have another person capable of doing it. And apparently neither Teyla nor Ford are able to do it (toward the end of the episode, they have a random soldier having to fly them over) which makes McKay not only the best choice but also the only one.

So whether he wanted to or not, what ever he was feeling inside, teaching Rodney how to fly the jumper was something that needed to be done. And here we are.

What Sheppard says is very interesting.

Granted, we don't know anything about his background at this point, often the way people talk to others reveals a lot about how they've been talked to in the past. It indicates that when ever he did something wrong as a child, he was corrected by snapping at him. My guy, you're in space. What could possibly happen if he lets go of the controls? You're going to veer off and crash into some more space?

It's also notable that he uses 'parents' instead of 'dad' or 'father' (both being that he is a guy and as dads are much more likely to be the one teaching kids how to drive; also, he himself was clearly taught by a driving instructor but teaching your kids how to drive is actually pretty common, it's a loving thing to do, and parents are supposed to be teaching their kids even in the case that they have an instructor, as kids learn by watching their parents whether they want it or not). So, you know. He has a mysterious past and a sad childhood, looks like.

Granted, McKay also seems to have had a pretty crappy childhood and, what's worse, seems to think it was all completely normal. We hear him reveal all manner of child abuse casually, here and there. It seems that they both were lonely and sad but for different reasons. McKay's immediate gut response "Snapping doesn't help!" is likewise telling, indicates that there was a lot of pressure put on him from a very young age.

Sheppard's use of the word 'parent' also creates distance between him and one or both of his parents. This man has been court-martialed, he has clearly been traumatized by something. He does not think he has anyone waiting for him back on earth. We know at this point that several people he served with have died, and that he blames himself for every one of these deaths. And he's not good at dealing with emotions, especially difficult ones. He says as much in Sateda (S03E04):

Sheppard: Look, Teyla. I'm not really good at, uh... Actually, I'm... I'm terrible at expressing... I don't know what you'd call it, uh... Teyla: Feelings? Sheppard: Yeah, sure,

He is terrible at expressing feelings. He especially has trouble verbalizing them.

When he is feeling difficult emotions, he uses self-soothing techniques (see the lip thing). One of these self-soothing techniques is creating distance between himself and the object of his emotion. So, instead of father he says parent (mom+dad) because he essentially uses the less significant, less painful thing (mom) to conceal the more significant, more painful thing (dad). Using the less significant object to create distance to the more difficult object forms like a barrier between him and an emotion he does not want to or can't face or deal with just then. Just like, in the previous episode, he used "Weir and McKay" instead of McKay. He was using the less significant, less important thing to mask the more significant, more important thing. It lessens the impact of the emotion attached to it. We see him do this a lot especially in connection to Rodney ("Even Rodney"). Again and again and again.

You can see him do the self-soothing lip thing before engaging McKay (like he's not sure he should say anything, like he wants to not have to say anything; he just can't help himself when it comes to this man):

Here, he is creating distance between himself and one or even both of his parents (and let's face it, it's probably the dad) but he's also, at the same time, creating distance between himself and McKay both by using the passive voice and lumping McKay into the category of kids. See previous episode as to why he desperately needs this distance between them.

But what he is actually saying here is that he is emotionally too close to McKay to be able to be an effective instructor to him. That's what he is saying. He's emotionally compromised. Now, whether you think his feelings are fatherly (he does not look at McKay the way a father looks at a son), friendly (he does not look at McKay the way a friend looks at a friend), collegial (he does not look at McKay the way he looks at Ford and Teyla), or whether you believe he thinks of himself as McKay's second uncle third removed, this is what he's saying in the scene. That he's too close to McKay to be able to teach him. He feels that he is too close to McKay.

It's possible that the whole reason as to why he's teaching McKay how to navigate the jumper is that it would allow him not to have to accompany him on these kinds of missions, harmless and scientific. If McKay knows how to fly a jumper, they would be able to spend less time together. Spending less time together would mean less emotion, would mean less pain, less of a chance for him to get McKay hurt or killed. This is foolish to think, of course, since absence has a tendency of making the heart grow fonder, as the saying goes. But we saw him start creating this distance between them at the end of The Eye (S1E10) and this is on par, is a logical continuation of that.

Humour, as it turns out, is another way of creating distance and coping with difficult emotions.

We are again reminded of the fact that McKay does not know not to keep it straight. Sheppard can do it in the air but not on land.

So, the thing is. As much as Sheppard wants to create distance between them, Mckay wants the opposite. He wants to connect with the Major. He's not making it easy for Sheppard. In this, he is defying him.

McKay tells Sheppard that he's touched by his sentiment. Keeps glancing at him. He refers to the puddle jumper, for all intents and purposes Sheppard's puddle jumper, as baby. He wants to see what this baby can do. Baby is a term of affection used most often by men to indicate that they see something or someone as soft and beautiful and needing to be taken care of in a gentle way. There is definitely something flirty in McKay using this term for Sheppard's puddle jumper.

But then Sheppard picks this up from McKay and also calls the jumper baby (yes, he's amused by the way McKay said it and ribbing on him, but picking up vocabulary from the object of your affection is yet another classic sign of attraction). They are taking care of the baby together. Parents, kids, babies. Freud probably would have a lot to say about the things they say and their subconscious desires.

Freud might also have something to say about Sheppard's fear that McKay is going to "snap the damn things off" if he doesn't ease up his grip on the control stick. But he doesn't want McKay to take his hands off them, either. He's instructing McKay on exactly how it likes to be held.

(We are also reminded of subconscious desires by the control display popping up, seeing how the puddle jumpers respond to Sheppard's mind; his desires.)

They are accompanied on the mission by two red shirts, random scientists we have never seen before but who we are to believe have worked with McKay previously and know him pretty well.

So, maybe it's because of the intense, borderline erotic look of concentration on McKay's face or his tone of voice, or what ever, Sheppard seems to start gravitating toward McKay. Even in front of two people he barely knows that work for the other man. Here, he turns back to look at Dr. Gaul, clearly amused by how different this scientist is from his scientist, but what he's doing at the same time is lean closer to Rodney:

He looks... turned on, frankly. And he sure as hell is not turned on by Dr. Gaul, sweating though he may be. The reason that he turned back to look at the nauseous scientist behind him might actually have been just to look away from the sex faces McKay is making while he's concentrating real hard.

Then he leans in even closer, to whisper conspiratorially to McKay. And McKay, well. He leans in, as well.

Sheppard: Why'd you choose this guy for the mission? McKay: Brendan's the one who discovered the Lagrange Point satellite was out here. Elizabeth felt he should see it for himself. Sheppard: Don't let go of the controls!

Sheppard snaps in a sudden jolt of panic. And it may not be McKay letting go of the controls that made him do it. It's that he mentioned Elizabeth, reminding him of why he needed to not be that close to Rodney. Just like McKay used Elizabeth's name (yelping "Elizabeth!" in near panic) when Sheppard was getting too close to him in his lab in The Storm (S01E09). They both seem to be using Weir as a... weir between them.

And again, as he will many, many times in the future, Sheppard needs to be touching something, needs to have his hands pressed against something, when he's near McKay:

Then they arrive at their destination and switch seats. They move seamlessly together, Sheppard needs only to mention his name and McKay does exactly what he wants, and is only too happy to oblige. We've seen this happen in movies between a man and a woman. It has never not been erotic (underlined by McKay's line "This thing is enormous!"):

Here, it's McKay that keeps glancing back and back at Sheppard as they're approaching the humongous ancient weapons platform. A weapons platform that should be a pretty interesting thing to look at, all things considered. But his eyes keep on being drawn back to Sheppard who, it should be noted, is wearing only a t-shirt.

Sheppard is trying not to look at McKay, catches himself several times before he does. He's not allowing himself to do it. That's until they come upon the wraith distress call from the planet below.

They look at each other. They communicate in words but they also communicate with their eyes. Suddenly, they are one mind again.

Continued in Pt. 2 (NB this episode focuses entirely on Sheppard and McKay so this is in 10 parts)

.* Actually Weir's whole "I didn't think so!" schtick would have made sense if it was about her knowing that Sheppard had been using her to create distance between himself and Rodney. Like she was telling him that she knows the half-hearted flirty smiles at the end of The Eye weren't really about her (same with the nurse right then) but were an attempt to build a defensive barrier between himself and the thought of losing someone important to him again. Because she knows.

Also, we would just have had a similar confession from Rodney where he was trying real hard to tell something to Weir and she wouldn't let him finish. Those almost confessions would mirror each other.

McKay: If this doesn't work... Weir: It will. McKay: I'm just saying, if it doesn't work... Weir: It will. McKay: I'm sure it will, but in the unlikely event that it doesn't, I... Weir: Rodney! Please.

---

Sheppard: Listen, uh, I'd like to say something while I still can. Weir: Don't! You're gonna get through this. Sheppard: If I was ... he wouldn't have let me go. Weir: Who wouldn't have let you go? Sheppard: The Wraith.

Sheppard: What I wanted to say was ... Weir: Save your strength, John, and tell me in person. Sheppard: This is important. Weir: I'm listening.

[rubadubdub3nunsinatub]

Hey there in reference to Wraith Lore and the Stargate Atlantis Legacy series I copied this from one of the author's LiveJournals ages ago pls don't ask for a link I have no idea about the Wraith and figure Id put it here instead of it laying about in notes. Enjoy!

Long ago, in the first days of the world, there were the First Mothers. Osprey was one of them, nine in all. Nine queens and ninety-nine men, blades and clevermen alike, for that is how people were made. That is how we were born in the ice of the first world, beneath the light of the moon. To each queen were given certain gifts, no two alike, for no two lineages are the same. We all count our names from them, from the First Mothers, and each tells its own story. […] She is queen of mists and shadows, strong in mind, weaving illusions to hide and deceive. She is a white flower, a white bird, a fog rising among the trees. She is the shadow of clouds trailing across the moon.

Q: "How is it determined whether a Wraith child grows up to be a blade or a cleverman? Is it through education and socialisation or is there a genetic component and the children are educated according to their talents?"A: It's based on their inclination and talents. An infant boy may grow up to be either blade or cleverman. It's an educational caste, not genetic. Except of course in the way that intelligence and temperament are genetic! Of course queen's inclinations are different too. In Secrets we'll meet a queen who, as she says, has the mind and interests of a cleverman, who would have chosen to study the Subcorporia if it did not interfere with her duties, sort of a Wraith Sam Carter! (A comparison Teyla does make!)

Q: "If it had something to do with genetics that would raise another question. If the Queen never mates with clevermen that would eventually result in the extinction of this caste and only the fierce and brave blades would survive. In that case, does the Queen have a means of control over her unborn children? Can she influence what disposition her children get?"A: Queens do mate with clevermen if they wish, though it's less common. It's extremely rare for a cleverman to become Consort however, as one of the Consort's duties is to physically protect the queen.

Q: "I'm asking this because in 'Homecoming' on page 34 there's a sentence that caught my attention for its interesting choice of words: 'She had honored him with a son, and then, as his utility had grown, with a daughter, …' If I'm reading this correctly it implies that Snow had indeed control of the gender of her children. I'm just thinking out loud now: we know female Wraith are very rare and no one knows why.”A: Without being too spoilery -- nine out of ten female embryos are inviable. The chances of a Wraith queen naturally conceiving and bearing a healthy daughter are very small. To that end most daughters are conceived by in vitro fertilization. Eggs and sperm are combined in the laboratory and the zygotes are allowed to begin their first divisions. They can then be tested and examined, and if the queen is trying to conceive a daughter, then only a healthy and viable embryo is implanted, while the nine out of ten that weren't viable are discarded. Otherwise a queen might miscarry nine times to bear a single daughter, a tremendous toll both physically and emotionally. The male embryos are more stable, and some sons are conceived naturally, while other queens opt for all their pregnancies to be in vitro, as the male embryos are still inviable at a much greater rate than for humans. Also, it allows queens who have a settled Consort and who do not wish to take a lover to vary the genetic material of their children. A particularly brilliant cleverman or a blade of a certain lineage may be selected to pass on their genes. Certainly it's incredibly unusual for more than two of a queen's children to have the same genetic father. It's far too important to manage the fragile gene pool.

Q. Do blades and clevermen get to interact much when off-duty?A. It depends on the individuals and the hive. Some do, some don't. Whether there are clevermen among the favorites of the zenana depends on the queen. It's up to her to admit whomever she wants. In The Lost, we see Dust and Quicksilver, who are both clevermen, in the zenana among the blades. And Michael (Lastlight) was high in his queen's confidence. But some hives don't value clevermen as much. The problem with that, of course, is that males can move from one hive to another, and a queen who treats clevermen badly will find it hard to keep competent engineers, healers, etc!

Q. Why are the clevermen beyond taking binding oaths? Does their independent thought preclude them from it?A. They aren't supposed to take part in combat, and so cannot be oathsworn to defend. Now, in real life there are clevermen who fight, as we saw with Michael! In The Lost we'll also see that Dust is armed, though he is emphatically not supposed to be! (And of course there are blades who do know something about the sciences, like Guide. Again, Guide and Sheppard. John's not a scientist, but he's no dummy either!)

Q. Cleverman Ember was singled out to be tested by Queen Death. Do Queens have a sense of an independent thought alarm, wary of Wraith who will not be so quick to fall in line with their rule, like Todd mentioned in The Queen?

A. Death could tell that Ember wasn't sold, and so she chose to make an example of him. So why is Guide not sold either? Teyla asks him this later on. He's very old and very much in control of his passions, and as he puts it, "the memory of Snow is a shield." He has had the things that most blades only dream of, and that memory is not easily supplanted by momentary allure.

[dedkake]

For the numbered ask meme: SGA (optional anime of choice if already answered), McShep, John Sheppard, annnnnd The Mummy/SG-1, please?

<333 thank you!!

001 | SGA

Favorite character: john sheppard

Least Favorite character: elizabeth weir am i allowed to say that? landry. get that guy outta here.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): john/rodney, ar1 ot4, carson/john, john/ronon, john/teyla

Character I find most attractive: not the question for me.

Character I would marry: carson? jennifer? lorne?

Character I would be best friends with: prrrrooobbably jennifer lol i'm not a very adventurous person.

a random thought: what happened to the "large, particularly venomous snake-like creature that inhabits the mainland" on new lantea?

An unpopular opinion: season 4 has the tightest plot

my canon OTP: i like that ships are not the focus of this show actually

Non-canon OTP: john is my fandom bicycle. get that boy with everyone.

most badass character: they're all kinda badasses, aren't they?

pairing I am not a fan of: i'm not terribly interested in ships that don't involve john, altho i see the logic behind most of them. so i'm probably not going out of my way to read them. or read longfic of them. or sparky sorry.

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): jjjjjjennifer. she was done so dirty by s5 and canon mckeller.

favourite friendship: john and teyla. teyla and rodney. teyla and ronon. ronon and john. john and rodney. radek and rodney. idk all of them. they are all such good friends and i love it.

character I want to adopt or be adopted by: please no. they are all my children, but i don't want the responsibility of any of that.

002 | mcshep

when of if I started shipping it: ngl i fought this one. when i started watching the show for real in early 2019, i told myself rodney didn't deserve to be redeemed from sg1 and that i wasn't going to fall into the Big Ship Trap. but dang i really did fall lmao. i love them.

my thoughts: friends to lovers, my beloved. they are so silly dorky and devoted.

What makes me happy about them: the friendship! the saving each other! the talking to each other on the comm! the bickering! all the things!!

What makes me sad about them: as i said before. i love angst. so i'm not really sad about the sad things. they can pine away in repression forever and i will be delighted.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: woobie rodney.

things I look for in fanfic: hurt/comfort. subby john. idk. pining. friends to lovers. quiet realizations. the inevitability of it all. domesticity. shepwhump.

My kinks: they can be so kinky together. d/s is good with them.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: john: anybody. rodney: uhhhh

My happily ever after for them: they retire as together civilians, but maybe not on atlantis.

003 | john sheppard

How I feel about this character: he's my sweet space disaster child

All the people I ship romantically with this character: everyone .. ..

My non-romantic OTP for this character: also everyone.

My unpopular opinion about this character: i'm not sure i have any lol. he looks good in every hat, i'm not picky. maybe--don't put him in charge of anything?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: omg i wanted at least one episode where he was captured/stranded/in peril and the team actually saved him without him doing 90% of the work himself. i want it SO BADLY. show this boy he's loved and cared for please. (istg i thought the team was going to kill kolya for john in irresponsible on my first watch and i'm still disappointed)

my het ship: john/teyla or john/sam fwb

my fem/slash ship: mcshep, john/ronon

my OTP: mcshep

my OT34: ar1

my cross over ship: no thank you (unless you count sg1 as a crossover, in which case, john/everyone over there too)

my kink: he just wants to be used a little bit.

a head cannon: he would've let jeannie die if wallace hadn't volunteered.

my gender bend: yes please.

004 | the mummy/sg1

hmm. so i hate to admit this on tumblr dot com, but i only saw the mummy once when it first came out and the bugs freaked me out and i never watched it again. i keep meaning to revisit, but i haven't gotten around to it 😂

i'm sure that any of the characters would make delightful matches with anyone from sg1. i can See The Potential.