#terfsgetabrainchallenge

[fancy--that]

As a trans man I didnt really start questioning my identity until i was 18-20 years old. I wasn't ashamed of my body weight, i didn't look at myself in the mirror and say "oh i have small titties men will never want me, oh my body isn't conventionally attractive i'll never be a good woman" I didnt say "oh im not like other girls i don't like makeup or pink or shopping" I was never a tomboyish kid, i was quite feminine my whole life. I tried to convince myself I was a lesbian thinking that was why i was feeling the way I did about me feeling wrong. I was also still a feminist. I changed over a period before that, when i wondered why I didn't like having breasts, when i didn't like speaking because of how my voice sounded, when my body was changing in ways i didn't like when i preferred dressing more masculine and i did this for a while but being a masculine woman wasn't the right answer for me either. When I started to transition I found myself, when i chose my name when people called me by my preferred pronouns when i embraced my identity is when everything changed. When I found a group of people who embraced me through every change, through every uncertainty who helped and supported me in every decision I made through every step of the journey to find myself.

We have got to get rid of the narrative that every single trans person was some "poor kid" who was different and got "brainwashed" into thinking they are trans or is some man or woman who is embracing toxic masculinity or stereotypical femininity. And additionally we also have to understand that as a society where a lot of small minded people believe that men HAVE to be masculine and women HAVE to be feminine that trans people especially trans youth may latch onto these ideas for a time to further affirm their identity. There are those who will or won't shave to feel gender euphoria, those who will dress only masculine or feminine to feel gender euphoria, who will change their hairstyles, their mannerisms, to feel gender euphoria. Is it always right? no. Since I don't shave and don't dress feminine and cut my hair short do I believe that this is what all men should do? no. When a trans woman wears makeup and dresses are they saying that is what all women should do? no. but its never a problem when cis men and cis women do the same thing.

"Oh but you can be a bisexual woman!" "Oh but you can be a woman who dresses masculine and doesn't shave!" "Cutting your hair and using a male name doesn't make you a man you can do all of these things as a woman" none of that is the point, the point is that biologically yes i was born a woman but my identity is not a woman. Living as a woman is not the way i can live my life, i experience intense gender dysphoria as a woman, being referred to as a woman, being perceived as a woman. I am not transitioning because of cis men. I am transitioning because of me.

additionally just because you thought you were trans and you aren't doesn't invalidate any other trans persons journey.

So fucking tired of trans backstories. 99% of transwomen’s (men’s) stories and 99% of transmen’s (women’s) stories are the exact same.

MtF (male): Sometimes in my early life I actually didn’t feel like a braindead muscle man and then later on I REALLY started emphasising with girls in porn. I got SUPER deep into forced feminisation probably bc it was the ONLY thing that allowed me to be a sexy girl (and got my d*ck hard) and then I was like what if I could be a hot girl with big mommy milkers irl???

FtM (female): Sometimes in my early life I WASN’T constantly only thinking about dresses and gossip and the colour pink. Also I got kinda uncomfortable thinking about my body compared to what society determines attractive women’s bodies should look like, and my ultimate life goal isn’t to be barefoot and pregnant. Then I was like, what if I could be treated like an actual HUMAN, not just a “girl,” irl???

That’s literally fucking it. And somehow they still don’t realise how ridiculous they are. My year-long stint of identifying as a “transman” fits perfectly into the second category, and it honestly just makes me cringe recalling it.