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technoblade-updates · 3 years ago

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A compilation of Technoblade in different people's VCs during MCC All-Stars!

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Transcript under the cut because this is very long.

Full Transcript

*Pink Parrots are standing at the entrance to the Terra Swoop Force - Tunnel 2 TGTTOS map.*

Tommy: Phil what do we do?

Wilbur: I’m stressed, I’m having another milk tray.

Tommy: Phil, what’s our strat, king?

Phil: What’s the strat?

Wilbur: This one- this one is a- this one is- this one looks like a fucking vagina.

Tubbo: Oh.

Phil: Oh?

Wilbur: I’m gonna show it on camera. It’s called the fucking perfect praline.

Tommy: What does a vagina look like?

Phil: Well, ignore that. The s- we’ll ignore- the strat is-

Tommy: How can I ignore vagina, when vagina-

Phil: TECHNO!

Techno (chanting): Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil!

Tommy: TECHNO!!!!

Wilbur (joining Techno’s chant): Phil! Phil! Phil! Phil!

Tubbo: Hi Techno.

Tommy (also joining the chanting): Phil! Phil! Phil!

Phil: Hi mate.

Wilbur: Technoblade!

Phil: I’ll try my best! I’ll try.

Techno: Philza Minecraft!

Philza: For you, Techno.

Techno: This is-

Wilbur: How are you doing, Phil?

Phil: What?

Wilbur: I mean Technoblade.

*Phil and Tommy laugh.*

Tommy: Phil, how are you?

Techno: This is his game! Phil first place let’s go!

Phil: I’ll try, I’ll try.

Tommy (clapping): Come on!

Techno: Phil first place let’s go!

Wilbur: We’ll do some- we’ll do some Civ after this.

Phil and Tommy: Yeah!

Phil: I’m gonna trade some gems.

Techno: I don’t have the attention spam for that game.

Tommy: I’m gonna start a war!

Phil: Oh god.

Wilbur (quoting Tommy): “I’m gonna start a war.” I’m going to win an act of traditional policy!

Techno: I don’t know who gave me perms to join these voice calls but they’ve made a big mistake.

*Phil and Tubbo laugh.*

Phil: Just gonna join everyone’s VC and just, like, scream at them.

Techno: I’m about to- heh- I’m about to go plug my merch on Dream’s stream, be right back.

Phil: Yes, do it! *laughs.*

Tommy: Do it! Do it! Do it!

*Cuts to Phil wacking an MCC participant who hasn’t won an event yet.*

Phil (after whacking GeminiTay): Wooo! First! Wait, second. Oh god, I got beat! *Laughs.*

Wilbur: Fourth! Fourth! Fourth! Fourth!

Techno: First place!

Phil: Wait, I think I got second. Wait, where did I come? Hold on, where the fuck am I?

Techno (chanting): Phil! Phil! Phil!

Wilbur: Phil, you got first! Phil, you got first! You beat Pete!

Phil: Did I?

Wilbur: Yeah, you got first, GeminiTay!

Phil: Oh! I saw Gemini’s fucking name and I was like “Wait, Gemini beat me.”

*Cuts to the Siege Map of TGTTOS.*

Techno: You guys are in first place, take my energy!

*Phil laughs:*

Wilbur: Yes, Technoblade!

Tommy: Yes!

Phil: Technoenergy.

Techno: Right, you- you only need- you only need 6k points to beat Red! You can- we can do that!

Wilbur (exasperated): Oh my god.

Phil: I can’t see shit. Oh no, I can’t break the-.

Wilbur: Oh my god I can’t get over the-.

Phil (laughs): It’s all downhill from here, boys.

Wilbur: Come on.

Techno (while very loud lawn mowing noises become audible): Okay, maybe I’m gonna mute when the lawnmower guy comes in.

Phil: I was just about to say.

Techno: Eheh hey, how’s your stream audio quality going?

Tommy: Fuck you, Sapnap, you punching bastard!

*Cuts to Phil watching Wilbur finish the Shallow Lava map of TGTTOS.*

Wilbur: Hello KryticZeuz.

Techno: He, like, stops at the end, camping.

Phil: What was that?

Wilbur (in a posh voice): I’ve decided I don’t like Minecraft Championships.

Phil (mimicking Wilbur’s posh accent): I’ve decided-.

Tommy (also mimicking Wilbur): I think this is gonna be my last one. Unless they remove Buildmart.

Techno: I’m done with Minecraft Championships.

*The new To The Dome! TGTTOS map gets revealed.*

Phil: Wait, woah woah woah woah woah what’s this? What’s this? What’s this?

Wilbur: Woah!

Techno: What the heck?

Wilbur: Yooo.

Phil: Wait a fucking minute.

*Cut to the Walls map of TGTTOS.*

Tommy (gasps): This is where the Tomster shines!

Phil: Yeah! Do it mate, you got this. You got this.

Wilbur: The what. I’m on the what?

Tommy: Hey Techno.

Techno: hello.

Tommy: This is the one we dynamic duoed on, Techno.

Techno: I’ve no recollection of this.

Tommy: Okay.

Techno: I don’t even know who you are.

Phil: Damn.

Tommy: Pff Techno?

Phil: Oh, I glitched. Ah.

Tommy: Oh you piece- I have never-.

Wilbur: Are you being dynamic right now, Tommy?

Phil: Nooo.

Tommy: Eh, no.

Techno: Are you at least being duo?

Tommy: I’m not even being duo. You know for the last game, do you wanna just sit at the end and camp everyone?

Tubbo: Yeah.

Wilbur: You just skepped, Tommy, you just skepped.

Tommy: You want to?

Phil: Oh that’s so mean.

Techno: Dude, I think it’d be so funny if when that- that cliffs map- if the person that got to the end first just camped the whole event.

Tommy: Do you wanna just- shall us 4- shall we just camp the last game.

Phil: If we can even get to the end!

Techno: If it’s Cliffs, for sure.

Wilbur: No, I wanna, I wanna play. I don’t wanna camp. That’s just not fun.

Tubbo: I will camp. Yeah, I’ll camp. I’ll camp.

Phil: Tommy, this requires us being cracked enough to all get to the end at the same time, turn around, and then punch.

Tubbo: No No, we can, we can, we can camp. We can camp. We simply can camp.

Tommy: We can, we just- we just can. Tubbo, we camp, don’t we?

Tubbo: Yeah, we camp.

*Phil sighs exasperatedly.*

Tommy: Yeah, we do.

Phil: We do a little camping. We do a little Vlog camping.

Techno: Alright, I don’t think you can camp on this one.

Tubbo: Oh they got rid of the rocket launchers. Aww.

Tommy: Alright, camp camp camp camp.

Techno: No, you can’t camp on this one. It won’t work.

Tommy: Watch me.

Techno (laughing): The anti-air camping.

Tubbo (screaming): I’m camping!

Tommy: Tubbo, I’m coming!

Techno: Why are you camping?

Tubbo (still screaming): I’m camping everyone! Camp those fuckers! Camp them! Camp them! Camp!

Phil: Oh my god! This is so-

*Phil and Tommy start losing their shit laughing to the point they sound like squeaky toys.*

Wilbur: I’m stressed again! I’m stressed again! This time I’m having- I’m having- this is it- the apple crunch. It’s the one-.

Phil: Oh my fucking god look at this mess. And you still finished before some of them. Holy fucking shit dude.

Wilbur: Chat. It’s right in the middle. It’s the middle one, chat. The middle one. It’s the middle one, chat. The middle one. Apple Crunch.

Tubbo: That was awesome.

Tommy: Tubbo that was insane, they like placed walls.

Techno: Aha-hah:

*Cuts to them outside the decision dome while waiting for Dodgebolt to begin.*

Tommy: Toby, we should do an MCC where our only goal is to make it awful for everyone else.

Techno: I’m logging in.

Tubbo: Do you wanna just do an MCC where we just throw.

Wilbur: Wait, log in, Technoblade, log in. I’ll meet at spawn.

Phil: Please log in. Will it let you log in?

Techno: I’m logging in.

Phil: Yes. Yes, he’s here!

Tommy: No.

Wilbur: Yes, Technoblade!

Phil: Yeah!

Techno: I’m in the event.

Tommy: Sleepy Bois! 4 out of 4!

Tubbo: Welcome to the event, Techno. Welcome!

Techno: I’m in the event, let’s go!

Phil: Look guys, he was here the whole time.

Tubbo: Yooooooo! There he is!

Wilbur: Yoooo!

Tommy: Yooooooo!

Phil (cont.): And nobody’s the wiser- oh, there he goes

Wilbur: Oh, follow him, follow him! Follow him, don’t let him get away! What are you doing?

Tommy: Yes!

Tubbo: Yooooooo!

Techno: Let’s go! Let’s gooo!

Tommy: Yo, screenie!

Wilbur: It’s just all of us, look!

Tubbo: Yooo!

Wilbur: Yoo!

Phil: With the fucking music as well. It’s like “Bam bah!”

Techno: I’m getting outta here!

Tommy (singing): Together again!

Tubbo: Where are you going?

Phil: Oh my god, dude.

Techno: I’m getting outta here! Wait, no, I hit something. Evasive manoeuvres!

Phil: It’s like the slowest manhunt in history.

Wilbur: Can you not see where you’re going?

Techno: I’m in reverse F5!

Wilbur: Oh! (recovering from laughter) Oh man.

Phil (also recovering from laughing really hard): Holy shit. This has been such a fun tournament, guys, oh my god.

Tommy: This has been really good.

Wilbur: [unintelligeable] -good.

Phil: This has been so much fun, I can’t- I can’t wait to do this again. (recovering from laughing) Oh, holy fuck.

Wilbur: Are you in the- Are you in the Dodgebolt screen right now, Techno?

Techno: Yeah.

Phil: Nice.

Wilbur: Are you getting the Dodgebolt talk?

Techno: Yeah, I’m about to sub in for a player, actually.

Wilbur: Who are you subbing in for?

Phil: Yeah they’re really a spring for it.

Techno: We were looking at- we were looking at the stats and Red seems like a pretty weak Dodgebolt team, so I’m actually gonna be their fifth player.

Tommy: Yeah, okay, I’m team Yellow, I don’t know about anyone else.

Phil: They need- Red needs all the help they can get.

Tubbo: Yeah, no.

Wilbur: I wonder why. I wonder why you’re team Yellow, Tommy.

Tommy: It’s because of Shubble, Wilbur.

Techno: Listen, I’m a- I’m a Sapnap stan, I- I gotta- I gotta be loyal.

Tommy: You’re a Sapnap stan?

Techno: Yeah, man, number 1 MCC player.

Phil (laughing): Why, why.

Tommy: Mkay.

Techno: He earns points! You make fun of me but his stats tho!

Phil: Oh my god, the fucking- it’s all about the numbers, isn’t it, Techno?

Tommy: I checked his plank!

Techno: Listen, he’s the better- larger number, better person, okay?

Phil (after losing his shit laughing): Alright, who are we supporting? Shubble?

Tommy: Yeah!

Phil: Alright.

Techno: Let’s go! *laughs.*

Phil (muted): King, thanks for the 55 fucking gifted holy shit thank you, thank you man, thank you. (unmuted) Pfff I’m sweating.

Wilbur: Am I the only yellow on this side- Techno! Techno!

Techno: I got- I gotta-. Hey, I’m on the red side, why are you over here?

Wilbur: I’ve also just- because this is so the Yellows can see my support!

Tommy: Will’s right, I’m coming to Will.

Techno: That’s true, that’s true, lemme go and- lemme go and figure out where Sapnap’s looking so I can get on screen. This is finally my chance to be noticed by my favourite streamer!

Wilbur: That’s one of your weird bits, Technoblade.

Techno: I’m just saying, if Sapnap was shooting right now things would be different.

Tommy: Why isn’t Sapnap, your hero, winning, Techno?

Techno: Yeah because they didn’t let him shoot!

Tubbo: Uh oh.

Tommy: Come on, Gogy, that was nice!

Techno: George, don’t get shot there.

Phil (as BBH and George get shot by Quig): Oh! Oh my god!

Tommy and Wilbur: Oh!

Tubbo (screaming): Oh! Oh my!

Phil: What the fuck?

Techno: Oh? Sap- Sapnap’s shooting, Sap- GG, it’s over. He’s gotta kill 3 people with 2 arrows!

Tubbo: Oh!

Techno: Oh my god!

Wilbur: I’m having the vagina chocolate again, it was nice.

Techno: Oh, sure, my bit’s weird but you can say that.

Tommy: You got this Shubble.

Phil: Oh look, Techno’s not even-

Wilbur: Techno, do you see me? Up here.

Phil (cont.): Oh, you guys can’t see.

Wilbur: Up here, up here on the- on the stands, to the- your- there!

Tommy: Maybe you don’t got this, Shubble

Techno: How did you get there?

Wilbur: Come- come here, come down below me. Come down below me, no, here, look. *Wilbur points at an onlooker NPC named technopond.* Look at this! Look at this! Look at this! Look!

Techno: Yo! Technopond!

Phil: Technopond.

Wilbur: It’s just a- it’s just a- it’s just a- it’s a small river.

Phil: A- a- a- a little lake. A little- little lake.

Tubbo: A tiny little lake.

Wilbur: See, okay, I- I will be honest with you. I’m rooting for Yellow right now, but I did say to Shelby earlier today-.

Tommy: Why are you rooting for Yellow? Why are you rooting for Yellow?

Wilbur: I did say to Shelby earlier today that she would come second and lose Dodgebolt. So there’s a part of me that wants me to be right.

Phil: Oh come on!

Techno: That was my- that was my prediction as well.

Phil: You’d rather be right than have her win?

Tommy: Oh, Callum! Only- only someone on a LAN set-up could do that! Jesus.

Wilbur: Mm true, true.

Techno: How does he never miss! Oh, I mean, uh, I didn’t see anything.

Tubbo: Oh! Oh, oh oh oh oh. You blinked just then, right? You blinked.

Tommy: That was a- that was one hell of a dunk, Callum.

Phil: Sapnap never misses.

Tommy: Nothing odd about that dunk, gents.

Techno: Listen, he shot- he shot Quig, okay? That’s all that matters.

Phil: (singing to the melody of the Dodgebolt music) Dudududu dudududu. (speaking normally again) The mind games, dude. Dream really wants that arrow but he knows he can’t get it. Oh. Oh! Woah!

Tommy: Why- why does he not just get it?

Phil: ‘Cuz, like, yeah, that’s- that- that’s why. Then he missed.

Tubbo: It’s trapped, it’s trapped!

Techno: Oh, here we go. Two arrows, two kills.

Phil: It’s a trap.

Techno: Oh my god he’s so good!

Tubbo: He just doesn’t miss!

Techno: How is one man this good at Minecraft?

Tommy: Oh.

Phil: Scott is cracked at dodging, to be fair, so this could swing the other way.

Tommy: Go on, Scott, you’re the real All-Star here, none of us schmucks.

Phil: Oh, that was so close

Tommy: Oh! Nevermind, Yellow Yaks.

Techno: I gotta.

Phil (laughing): Nevermind.

Wilbur: Ignore what I say

Tommy: I take everything I [said] back ever, Yellow Yaks.

Wilbur: Hey, is anyone- I wonder if anyone listening to this stream has currently got their skin in the grand stands. Any of these people. Can you update your skin just to see if it- if it does it?

Phil: You have to, like, pick someone.

Wilbur: Update- everyone change to me, change your skin to me. I wanna see if there’s any people with me.

Phil: This is gonna be really weird.

Tommy: You-.

Phil: This’ll be really fucking weird if it updates live.

Wilbur: Yeah, people’s skin just changing.

Tommy: If it does, make it something awful.

Phil: No! What the fuck!

Tommy: Go on, go on awelvs or L_apis.

Techno: Oh my god, Sapnap is just so good at Minecraft.

Tommy: You got this Shub ble.

Phil: Is Michael trying to bribe people? What is happening?

Wilbur: What is- what is Michael doing? I don’t get it.

Phil: I don’t know. I saw 50k and I was just confused. Is he trying to bribe? Oh, it- oh, he’s just saying “This is the MCC with the prize pool”, he’s trying to give red team-.

Tommy: I’d take a bribe.

Phil: What?

*Loud and fast keyboard clicking noises can be heard.*

Wilbur: Who’s typing up a storm?

Tommy: Who is- who’s the keyboard warrior?

Wilbur: Technoblade’s just *loud keysmashing noises.*

Phil: He knows his spamming, dude.

Techno: Listen, I need that mechanical keyboard, okay?

Tommy: What does “NS” mean?

Phil and Wilbur: Nice Shot.

Wilbur: Or “no shit”.

Tommy: Well mine means “nice shit”. Or- or nn-.

Wilbur: Woah! Woah! Woah!

Techno: Eyyyyyy.

Tommy: Go on, Scott. Scottiam. Scott, do slash ban!

Tubbo: Scott’s gotta clutch up now.

Wilbur: Woah! Someone’s got my skin! Someone’s got my fucking skin!

Phil: Wait, it happened? Where?

Tommy: Wait, really?

Wilbur: Ghostgobrrr is just Ghostbur, but that might- they might have already been- they might have already been that, actually.

Phil: That’s probably already been that, yeah. It’s got, like, the little stab wound and everything.

Techno: There’s a-.

Tubbo: Uh oh.

Phil: Sorry about that, by the way.

Techno: Guys, I found- I found Skepnoblade.

Phil (muted and in a high pitched voice): Is this lore?

Tommy: Do slash ban, Scott, do slash ban! Why did you just- that was- Sapnap.

Wilbur: Skepnoblade; that’s your- thats if you want to search up, ya know, Technoblade and Skeppy-.

*Loud MCC winner music interrupts Wilbur as Sapnap shoots Scott and Red Rabbits win.*

Tommy: That was awesome!

Phil: Oh! GG.

Tubbo: Ey.

Techno: Yooooo!

Wilbur: Oh? Oh, good job, Red Rabbits! That ended that conversation fast.

Phil (laughing): Let’s never speak of that again.

Tommy: That was so cool!

Wilbur: Good job, Red.

Tubbo: That was pretty cool.

Wilbur: No one saw it coming.

Phil: Not a single person saw this coming. Not one soul.

Techno: All of the reddit predictions were wrong.

Tubbo: All of the-.

Tommy (dismayed): Dream wins again. 15 MCCs without Dodgebolt.

Wilbur: Dream wins again. Like, it’s just like- it just becomes, like, every- every MCC at the end we’re just, like (dismayed) “Dream’s won again.”

Tommy: Ah, well done.

Wilbur (cont.):Good. Good to know. Nice.” Meanwhile- meanwhile Technoblade’s- meanwhile Technoblade’s given 3 E-tier players to balance him.

Techno: Okay, that was- it wasn’t quite that bad.

Tommy: Did anyone see the new MCC?

Wilbur: Nah, see- nah Dream-

Techno: Nah.

Wilbur (cont.): Dream did well! Dream did well. I’m only- I’m only playing.

Phil: We’re all friends, jesus christ. Oh, that was really fun. That was so much fun.

Techno: Listen, how are you- how are you supposed to balance Sapchad, alright? He just earns 8k points per tournament.

Wilbur: Yeah, you can’t balance- you can’t balance Sapnap, he’s a legend.

Phil: Sap- are you- are you still calling him Sapchad?

Wilbur: Pff Sapchad.

Phil: I hate- I hate this.

Techno: He just can’t be stopped.

Phil: I hate this so much.

Tommy: I’m tired.

Phil: All energy gone. Are you- are you too tired for Civ though?

Tubbo: Yeah.

Tommy: No. Never too tired for Civ.

*Cuts to Phil ending stream.*

Phil: Civ? Uh, yeah, we’re not gonna stream it. We’re just gonna go hang out. Uh, me- me, Techno, Tommy, maybe Tubbo, Will and Kristin are gonna go play Civ, because we’ve been pl- trying to play Civ for the past, like, two weeks. And every time Will’s either busy with something or Tommy’s busy or we just, like- or I’m, like, away doing something. It’s just- it’s just been brrrr. So I finally said “How about after MCC we’re all gonna be, like, at a PC and just finish streaming so we can just chill.” And they said “Yeah” so, like, we’re gonna go play.

*Switch to Sapnap’s POV.*

Dream: -grab the arrow, no one grab the arrow. Please.

Sapnap: Technoblade! TECHNO!

Dream: Yeah!

BBH: Let’s go!

Dream: He said- he said “GO SAPNAP CARRY THOSE NOOBS!” Let’s go!

George: How’s Technoblade here?

BBH: Let’s go! Techno!

Dream: He’s spectating in the stands.

Sapnap: Techno!

George: Alright, that’s it.

Dream: We’re gonna win for Techno, we’re gonna win for Techno.

Sapnap: This is for Techno! This is for Techno!

Dream: This is for Techno. From my first win to the All-Stars win.

*Cuts to the end of Dodgebolt.*

Sapnap: Hold on, watch this, watch this. I’ve always- I’ve always wanted to do this. I’ve always- I’ve always wanted to do this.

George: Give it to Bad! Give it to Bad! Give it to Bad!

BBH: No no no, just get him. Just get him.

Sapnap: Oh shit.

BBH: What?

Dream: Sapnap, what are you doing?

BBH: Sapnap.

George: Bad, take the last shot.

BBH: No, just muffin him.

Sapnap: There it is

Dream: Yeah! Let’s go! Yes! Yeah!

George: Woo! Let’s go!

BBH: That was fun.

George: Don’t jump off the podium!

Dream: Don’t jump off the podium. Stay on the podium.

George: Oh my god! Let’s go!

BBH: Let’s go!

George: Wait get a screenshot!

BBH: There’s Techno! He’s right over there!

Sapnap: Bad, back up, back up.

Dream: Dream Team!

George: Back up, line- get in a line, get in a line, guys.

Sapnap: Let’s go!

Dream: We won! We did it! We’re the best!

BBH: That was fun.

Sapnap: IT WAS ALL FOR TECNHO.

BBH: Let’s go!

Dream: Techno!

Sapnap: TECHNO, I can’t spell.

Sapnap: Techno!

BBH: Techno!

Techno: Sapnap! Sapnap!

Dream: Yeah!

BBH: Let’s go!

George: Let’s go!

Sapnap: Let’s go!

Techno: Listen, I- I only- I only tweeted to vote Buildmart ‘cuz I was trying to preserve your guys’ momentum for Battle Box, alright? You gotta believe me. You gotta believe me.

Dream: Oh yeah. Oh, that’s true, that really would have worked! That might have worked, that might have worked. Before our morale went in the toilet and then we were all- we were all fighting. Infighting

Techno: Exactly.

Sapnap: Oh my god. That battle box was, like, really cringe, I don’t know how that happened like that.

Punz: Was the map just bad for you guys?

Dream: Yea, I think- well this is- well, I think was bad, but I-

George: People filled in the middle every time, pretty much, on us. Like, they- they just rushed the middle and filled it in, we couldn’t stop them.

Dream: Yeah. Yeah.

Punz: Yeah, I think I rushed-

Dream: I think- I will- I will say this, I think- I think I- I was- I was- because I’m not used to the map being in the middle I was just assuming “Oh, well Bad and George are both, like, super super good and so they can just, ya know, so they- they should be able to defend themselves”, which would happen on, like, a normal map. But on that map it’s, like, I guess I was just going right-

Sapnap (overlapping with Dream): ‘Cause, like, you can’t get up- you can’t get there really fast.

Dream (cont.): -so I never really experienced the middle, like, from the beginning, so, like, I didn’t- I was- I was just thinking they were being idiots and then, like, the- and then I was, like “Wait, okay so it’s kind of- it’s kind of annoying. Like, we kinda have to go in the middle and do something dumb”, but-

Sapnap: Yeah. ‘Cuz, like you can’t get- yeah, you can’t get to the middle fast. You can’t get to the middle fast, which is troll

Punz: They can, like, wall you off for arrows with the leaves.

Techno: Yeah. Well the thing is once you control middle you can just, like, start knocking people off if they can’t dodge.

Sapnap: It’s over, it’s over.

Dream: Yeah

Punz: That’s also true.

Sapnap: Controlling middle is OP.

Dream: We should have- we should have- we should have controlled middle. Bad- to be fair I think Bad was saying that and we were calling him, like, an idiot.

Bad: Yeah.

Punz: Who went blue vault path? That’s one I went on.

Sapnap: I dunno.

George: Bad went to blue.

Punz: Oh, ok.

Sapnap: I was just running around.

Techno: Uh, yeah that was me.

Dream: Heh, yeah Techno did that one.

George: Haha Punz, hey man.

Dream: Thanks for playing on my account again, Techno. I really- I really appreciate it.

Techno: No problem, man, just let me know if you ever need it.

Dream: Alright, will do, will do. Both times I got first, actually you were playing on my account, I forgot about that.

Techno: That’s true, that’s true. Well, I wasn’t gonna say anything because I get paid so much money to.

Bitzel: My dog’s playing on my account.

Techno: It’s like- it’s like ghostwriting but for Minecraft.

Dream: That’s fine, that’s fine, the secret’s out, it’s fine. They’d find out eventually.

George: Now everyone knows, everyone knows, it’s out.

Techno: That’s why- that’s why I haven’t been playing in MCC, actually.

George: You have, you’ve secretly been playing.

Krinios: Too busy playing as Dream?

Dream: It’s more profitable to play as me for money.

Krinios: It’s a full time job

Dream: It’s more profitable to play as me for money than to stream it.

Techno: Exactly

Dream: I just- I’ve had a little bit of trouble covering it, you know, but I’ve gotten used to it and gotten better.

Techno: Nah, you just- you just couldn’t stop playing crab game for like 3 hours, so you had to have me play.

George: No no no no, not three hours, three days- four days, actually, four days straight.

Dream: The funny thing is, Techno, now that you mention that; before, when I was practicing yesterday, every time I- I went to go sprint, my sprint key is E in crab game, is I went to go sprint and I would open my inventory and I’d be, like “Oh my god! Like, what am i doing? I’m gonna throw tomorrow.”

George: You’re a crab game YouTuber now.

Sapnap: Okay, when- when’s the Christmas alt- I mean Christmas MCC go next? GG go next.

Punz: True.

Dream: No, they’re- they’re announcing the one that’s in a week tomorrow, you forgot.

Sapnap: Oh, my bad.

Krinios: The real [unintelligeble]

Sapnap: Me and- Me and- me- it’s gonna- it’s me and Punz- me and Punz are playing together.

Sylvee: Thanksgiving edition.

Techno: Oh my god, leak?

Dream: I didn’t even leak that, I didn’t even leak that.

Punz: We are? Oh yeah, we are.

Sapnap: We are.

Punz: I saw the teams.

Sapnap: I think it’s me, Punz, Dream and Techno? Something like that, I dunno.

Techno: Aww, why’d you have to go and leak that? It was gonna be- It was gonna get so many retweets!

Sapnap: Ah, sh- it would get so many retweets, imagine.

Dream: What is the team that- what is the team that would get the most retweets, that’s the question.

Bitzel: Me, and then anyone else.

Punz: Techno, Tommy, Dream and, like, George, probably.

Dream: Grian or something, maybe?

Punz: Probably Grian, yeah.

George: And Skeppy. Skeppy.

Bitzel: Mm, maybe

Techno: I think we shouldn’t underestimate Ranboo here.

Dream: Oh, or actually, that’s true, yeah, right? Ranboo, hm.

Techno: He’s a powerful player.

Dream: But who would get more retweets, Tommy or Ranboo? That’s the quest- that’s the question. That’s a tough one, that’s a tough one.

George: Hmm.

Techno: Oo!

George: Let’s play “Who gets the most retweets”.

Dream: “What would be, like, the most retweeted team ever” and I was, like “Maybe Grian, if Grian was on a team like me, Techno, either Ranboo or Tommy, Grian. It would be epic.

Grian: That’s happened. When I played with Tech it was, uh-

BBH: Guys I’m gonna call Skeppy.

Scott: Congratulations! You did well!

Dream and Sapnap: Thank you!

Techno: Thank you, thank you.

Sapnap: I can’t believe we won 100k each.

Scott: That’s a no.

George: Yeah, All-Stars had a cash prize.

Scott: Yeah, from Dream because he was gonna give it for voting Buildmart first round.

Techno: Yoo, that’s why I tweeted.

Bitzel: Yeah Dream, um, my Paypal.

Krinios: Oh, so you want my Paypal since I voted for it?

Sylvee: You guys can donate to my stream, if that makes things easier.

Scott: Yeah, just donate it as bits or something, that works too.

Techno: Twitch taking a cut for just nothing.

Krinios: I’ll accept the money or be on my team next time, I’ll accept either or.

Scott: Yeah.

Dream: Wanna Hear something interesting, Scott?

Scott: Always.

Dream: I played- I sandkeeper in Sands of Time.

Sapnap (quoting Dream): I Sand- I Sandkeeper.

Scott: *Gasp* You were Sand Daddy for Sands of Time?

Dream: I- I was. I was.

Techno: So he could get the most points.

Scott: You did so well!

Dream: Thank you.

George: So Scott, I get a season 2 coin, right?

Sapnap: Oh yeah, George does!

Scott: Yes, you do.

George: Yes!

Sylvee: Can I have a season 2 coin too, Scott?

techno: Can I get one?

Scott: I will get to you, Sylvee, I’ve just got to, like-it’s you- the time we won was, like, I still have boxes in my house, so.

Sapnap: See, that’s impossible, you can’t just team with a team that’s, like, won before. We didn’t win, so that’s why I was, like-.

Scott: That is the rule, yeah, so if a team’s won once, I don’t-.

Sylvee: Well, what about- what about MCC 7 Purple Pandas. Can we do that? We never won. Please?

Scott (laughing): No.

Punz: Which one was that?

Sapnap: It’s Dream Team plus Sylvee.

Scott: That was Sylvee, Sapnap, Dream and George. Like, Nono.

Techno: Oh god.

Punz: You guys didn’t win?

Sapnap: Alright, who- who hasn’t- I wanna team with Captain Sparklez, I’m getting him his win, I don’t care. I’ll do it, I’ll be the one who does it.

Scott: Sapnap’s like “Fine, I’ll do it.” Sapnap you’ve already had a chance, you didn’t win

Krinios: No, Jordan has won with me.

Sapnap: Yeah, but that was- that was- that was before, that was before.

Techno: You guys didn’t have to do Captain like that in the elevator.

Scott: It wasn’t just Captain! But no, we definitely did have to do Captain like that.

Sapnap: I’ll- I’ll get Captain his win, I’ll do it, I’ll be the one. I’ll break the curse.

Krinios: Nah, that’s me with Krimson Krakens.

Techno: The Captain’s next team is about to be, like, Dream, Sapnap, PeteZahHutt.

#technoblade #dream smp #dsmp #mcyt #mcc #transcript available #I'll add captions to the video later but I just want to finally be able to post this #mod luna #edit: added colour co-ordination to the transcript so it’s less of a wall of text

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