#technically a personak post but rly just me rambling

[invaderofdoom]

( before i go on- im fine jsyk- but its been a weird few days and im like?? in a really weird fuzzy and dissociative state where nothing really feels real but its much better than it was earlier when i was walking around walmart literally struggling not to pass out frm lightheadedness but thats not the point sorry (although im sorry in advance for typos because my visions still kinda blurry and my head still feels like theres nothing but the endless vacuum of space inside) 

i just wanted to say thank u to every wonderful person ive met here. never in a community have i ever been so............ at home and at peace. in 99% of rp communities i always feel like people are going to lose interest in me and my writing if i cant be on for a few days, like if i dont reply as quickly as humanly possible than theyre not going to want to write wigh me but i dont really get that here... here i just want to reply to things as fast as i can because im genuinely having a good time and i hope that the people im writing with are also having a good time so i want to make them as happy as they make me when i see them reply...

i have had the most Kind and Caring messages here in like less than a month than ive  had in years in other communities and i just really appreciate it... im not a very healthy person in case it wasnt obvious by now. im severely limited in my day to day life because of my mental health. (+ the state has me as unable to work rght now so most of the time im just stuck at home w my family) things have been... rough lately between my insurance going away (i got it back tho) and having to pay for my meds out of pocket bc of it and just my home life has been extra terrible cuz of my sisters terrible likely abusive boyfriend + my sisters and moms untreated borderline and bipolar and i feel like i would be. in a much worse state right now if it wasnt for all of the love yall have been giving me. i feel like id be much worse off if i couldnt come here and just write when i feel like it and when i want to without anyone getting mad or upset at me... idk... its nice here!! and i jst wanted to say that i rly appreciate it............... 

no replie s tonight because i need my rest after almost passing out but hopefully ill be around tomorrow or the next day because i havesome rly fun things i wanna get to !! 

goodnight )