#technically “science” should be “technology” but you get the point

[immawraffle]

“Any sufficiently advanced science is indistinguishable from magic” -> “any sufficiently understood magic is indistinguishable from science”

[mostlysignssomeportents]

The disenshittified internet starts with loyal "user agents"

I'm in TARTU, ESTONIA! Overcoming the Enshittocene (TOMORROW, May 8, 6PM, Prima Vista Literary Festival keynote, University of Tartu Library, Struwe 1). AI, copyright and creative workers' labor rights (May 10, 8AM: Science Fiction Research Association talk, Institute of Foreign Languages and Cultures building, Lossi 3, lobby). A talk for hackers on seizing the means of computation (May 10, 3PM, University of Tartu Delta Centre, Narva 18, room 1037).

There's one overwhelmingly common mistake that people make about enshittification: assuming that the contagion is the result of the Great Forces of History, or that it is the inevitable end-point of any kind of for-profit online world.

In other words, they class enshittification as an ideological phenomenon, rather than as a material phenomenon. Corporate leaders have always felt the impulse to enshittify their offerings, shifting value from end users, business customers and their own workers to their shareholders. The decades of largely enshittification-free online services were not the product of corporate leaders with better ideas or purer hearts. Those years were the result of constraints on the mediocre sociopaths who would trade our wellbeing and happiness for their own, constraints that forced them to act better than they do today, even if the were not any better:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/24/naming-names/#prabhakar-raghavan

Corporate leaders' moments of good leadership didn't come from morals, they came from fear. Fear that a competitor would take away a disgruntled customer or worker. Fear that a regulator would punish the company so severely that all gains from cheating would be wiped out. Fear that a rival technology – alternative clients, tracker blockers, third-party mods and plugins – would emerge that permanently severed the company's relationship with their customers. Fears that key workers in their impossible-to-replace workforce would leave for a job somewhere else rather than participate in the enshittification of the services they worked so hard to build:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/22/kargo-kult-kaptialism/#dont-buy-it

When those constraints melted away – thanks to decades of official tolerance for monopolies, which led to regulatory capture and victory over the tech workforce – the same mediocre sociopaths found themselves able to pursue their most enshittificatory impulses without fear.

The effects of this are all around us. In This Is Your Phone On Feminism, the great Maria Farrell describes how audiences at her lectures profess both love for their smartphones and mistrust for them. Farrell says, "We love our phones, but we do not trust them. And love without trust is the definition of an abusive relationship":

https://conversationalist.org/2019/09/13/feminism-explains-our-toxic-relationships-with-our-smartphones/

I (re)discovered this Farrell quote in a paper by Robin Berjon, who recently co-authored a magnificent paper with Farrell entitled "We Need to Rewild the Internet":

https://www.noemamag.com/we-need-to-rewild-the-internet/

The new Berjon paper is narrower in scope, but still packed with material examples of the way the internet goes wrong and how it can be put right. It's called "The Fiduciary Duties of User Agents":

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3827421

In "Fiduciary Duties," Berjon focuses on the technical term "user agent," which is how web browsers are described in formal standards documents. This notion of a "user agent" is a holdover from a more civilized age, when technologists tried to figure out how to build a new digital space where technology served users.

A web browser that's a "user agent" is a comforting thought. An agent's job is to serve you and your interests. When you tell it to fetch a web-page, your agent should figure out how to get that page, make sense of the code that's embedded in, and render the page in a way that represents its best guess of how you'd like the page seen.

For example, the user agent might judge that you'd like it to block ads. More than half of all web users have installed ad-blockers, constituting the largest consumer boycott in human history:

https://doc.searls.com/2023/11/11/how-is-the-worlds-biggest-boycott-doing/

Your user agent might judge that the colors on the page are outside your visual range. Maybe you're colorblind, in which case, the user agent could shift the gamut of the colors away from the colors chosen by the page's creator and into a set that suits you better:

https://dankaminsky.com/dankam/

Or maybe you (like me) have a low-vision disability that makes low-contrast type difficult to impossible to read, and maybe the page's creator is a thoughtless dolt who's chosen light grey-on-white type, or maybe they've fallen prey to the absurd urban legend that not-quite-black type is somehow more legible than actual black type:

https://uxplanet.org/basicdesign-never-use-pure-black-in-typography-36138a3327a6

The user agent is loyal to you. Even when you want something the page's creator didn't consider – even when you want something the page's creator violently objects to – your user agent acts on your behalf and delivers your desires, as best as it can.

Now – as Berjon points out – you might not know exactly what you want. Like, you know that you want the privacy guarantees of TLS (the difference between "http" and "https") but not really understand the internal cryptographic mysteries involved. Your user agent might detect evidence of shenanigans indicating that your session isn't secure, and choose not to show you the web-page you requested.

This is only superficially paradoxical. Yes, you asked your browser for a web-page. Yes, the browser defied your request and declined to show you that page. But you also asked your browser to protect you from security defects, and your browser made a judgment call and decided that security trumped delivery of the page. No paradox needed.

But of course, the person who designed your user agent/browser can't anticipate all the ways this contradiction might arise. Like, maybe you're trying to access your own website, and you know that the security problem the browser has detected is the result of your own forgetful failure to renew your site's cryptographic certificate. At that point, you can tell your browser, "Thanks for having my back, pal, but actually this time it's fine. Stand down and show me that webpage."

That's your user agent serving you, too.

User agents can be well-designed or they can be poorly made. The fact that a user agent is designed to act in accord with your desires doesn't mean that it always will. A software agent, like a human agent, is not infallible.

However – and this is the key – if a user agent thwarts your desire due to a fault, that is fundamentally different from a user agent that thwarts your desires because it is designed to serve the interests of someone else, even when that is detrimental to your own interests.

A "faithless" user agent is utterly different from a "clumsy" user agent, and faithless user agents have become the norm. Indeed, as crude early internet clients progressed in sophistication, they grew increasingly treacherous. Most non-browser tools are designed for treachery.

A smart speaker or voice assistant routes all your requests through its manufacturer's servers and uses this to build a nonconsensual surveillance dossier on you. Smart speakers and voice assistants even secretly record your speech and route it to the manufacturer's subcontractors, whether or not you're explicitly interacting with them:

https://www.sciencealert.com/creepy-new-amazon-patent-would-mean-alexa-records-everything-you-say-from-now-on

By design, apps and in-app browsers seek to thwart your preferences regarding surveillance and tracking. An app will even try to figure out if you're using a VPN to obscure your location from its maker, and snitch you out with its guess about your true location.

Mobile phones assign persistent tracking IDs to their owners and transmit them without permission (to its credit, Apple recently switch to an opt-in system for transmitting these IDs) (but to its detriment, Apple offers no opt-out from its own tracking, and actively lies about the very existence of this tracking):

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/14/luxury-surveillance/#liar-liar

An Android device running Chrome and sitting inert, with no user interaction, transmits location data to Google every five minutes. This is the "resting heartbeat" of surveillance for an Android device. Ask that device to do any work for you and its pulse quickens, until it is emitting a nearly continuous stream of information about your activities to Google:

https://digitalcontentnext.org/blog/2018/08/21/google-data-collection-research/

These faithless user agents both reflect and enable enshittification. The locked-down nature of the hardware and operating systems for Android and Ios devices means that manufacturers – and their business partners – have an arsenal of legal weapons they can use to block anyone who gives you a tool to modify the device's behavior. These weapons are generically referred to as "IP rights" which are, broadly speaking, the right to control the conduct of a company's critics, customers and competitors:

https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/

A canny tech company can design their products so that any modification that puts the user's interests above its shareholders is illegal, a violation of its copyright, patent, trademark, trade secrets, contracts, terms of service, nondisclosure, noncompete, most favored nation, or anticircumvention rights. Wrap your product in the right mix of IP, and its faithless betrayals acquire the force of law.

This is – in Jay Freeman's memorable phrase – "felony contempt of business model." While more than half of all web users have installed an ad-blocker, thus overriding the manufacturer's defaults to make their browser a more loyal agent, no app users have modified their apps with ad-blockers.

The first step of making such a blocker, reverse-engineering the app, creates criminal liability under Section 1201 of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, with a maximum penalty of five years in prison and a $500,000 fine. An app is just a web-page skinned in sufficient IP to make it a felony to add an ad-blocker to it (no wonder every company wants to coerce you into using its app, rather than its website).

If you know that increasing the invasiveness of the ads on your web-page could trigger mass installations of ad-blockers by your users, it becomes irrational and self-defeating to ramp up your ads' invasiveness. The possibility of interoperability acts as a constraint on tech bosses' impulse to enshittify their products.

The shift to platforms dominated by treacherous user agents – apps, mobile ecosystems, walled gardens – weakens or removes that constraint. As your ability to discipline your agent so that it serves you wanes, the temptation to turn your user agent against you grows, and enshittification follows.

This has been tacitly understood by technologists since the web's earliest days and has been reaffirmed even as enshittification increased. Berjon quotes extensively from "The Internet Is For End-Users," AKA Internet Architecture Board RFC 8890:

Defining the user agent role in standards also creates a virtuous cycle; it allows multiple implementations, allowing end users to switch between them with relatively low costs (…). This creates an incentive for implementers to consider the users' needs carefully, which are often reflected into the defining standards. The resulting ecosystem has many remaining problems, but a distinguished user agent role provides an opportunity to improve it.

And the W3C's Technical Architecture Group echoes these sentiments in "Web Platform Design Principles," which articulates a "Priority of Constituencies" that is supposed to be central to the W3C's mission:

User needs come before the needs of web page authors, which come before the needs of user agent implementors, which come before the needs of specification writers, which come before theoretical purity.

https://w3ctag.github.io/design-principles/

But the W3C's commitment to faithful agents is contingent on its own members' commitment to these principles. In 2017, the W3C finalized "EME," a standard for blocking mods that interact with streaming videos. Nominally aimed at preventing copyright infringement, EME also prevents users from choosing to add accessibility add-ons that beyond the ones the streaming service permits. These services may support closed captioning and additional narration of visual elements, but they block tools that adapt video for color-blind users or prevent strobe effects that trigger seizures in users with photosensitive epilepsy.

The fight over EME was the most contentious struggle in the W3C's history, in which the organization's leadership had to decide whether to honor the "priority of constituencies" and make a standard that allowed users to override manufacturers, or whether to facilitate the creation of faithless agents specifically designed to thwart users' desires on behalf of manufacturers:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2017/09/open-letter-w3c-director-ceo-team-and-membership

This fight was settled in favor of a handful of extremely large and powerful companies, over the objections of a broad collection of smaller firms, nonprofits representing users, academics and other parties agitating for a web built on faithful agents. This coincided with the W3C's operating budget becoming entirely dependent on the very large sums its largest corporate members paid.

W3C membership is on a sliding scale, based on a member's size. Nominally, the W3C is a one-member, one-vote organization, but when a highly concentrated collection of very high-value members flex their muscles, W3C leadership seemingly perceived an existential risk to the organization, and opted to sacrifice the faithfulness of user agents in service to the anti-user priorities of its largest members.

For W3C's largest corporate members, the fight was absolutely worth it. The W3C's EME standard transformed the web, making it impossible to ship a fully featured web-browser without securing permission – and a paid license – from one of the cartel of companies that dominate the internet. In effect, Big Tech used the W3C to secure the right to decide who would compete with them in future, and how:

https://blog.samuelmaddock.com/posts/the-end-of-indie-web-browsers/

Enshittification arises when the everyday mediocre sociopaths who run tech companies are freed from the constraints that act against them. When the web – and its browsers – were a big, contented, diverse, competitive space, it was harder for tech companies to collude to capture standards bodies like the W3C to secure even more dominance. As the web turned into Tom Eastman's "five giant websites filled with screenshots of text from the other four," that kind of collusion became much easier:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/18/cursed-are-the-sausagemakers/#how-the-parties-get-to-yes

In arguing for faithful agents, Berjon associates himself with the group of scholars, regulators and activists who call for user agents to serve as "information fiduciaries." Mostly, information fiduciaries come up in the context of user privacy, with the idea that entities that hold a user's data would have the obligation to put the user's interests ahead of their own. Think of a lawyer's fiduciary duty in respect of their clients, to give advice that reflects the client's best interests, even when that conflicts with the lawyer's own self-interest. For example, a lawyer who believes that settling a case is the best course of action for a client is required to tell them so, even if keeping the case going would generate more billings for the lawyer and their firm.

For a user agent to be faithful, it must be your fiduciary. It must put your interests ahead of the interests of the entity that made it or operates it. Browsers, email clients, and other internet software that served as a fiduciary would do things like automatically blocking tracking (which most email clients don't do, especially webmail clients made by companies like Google, who also sell advertising and tracking).

Berjon contemplates a legally mandated fiduciary duty, citing Lindsey Barrett's "Confiding in Con Men":

https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3354129

He describes a fiduciary duty as a remedy for the enforcement failures of EU's GDPR, a solidly written, and dismally enforced, privacy law. A legally backstopped duty for agents to be fiduciaries would also help us distinguish good and bad forms of "innovation" – innovation in ways of thwarting a user's will are always bad.

Now, the tech giants insist that they are already fiduciaries, and that when they thwart a user's request, that's more like blocking access to a page where the encryption has been compromised than like HAL9000's "I can't let you do that, Dave." For example, when Louis Barclay created "Unfollow Everything," he (and his enthusiastic users) found that automating the process of unfollowing every account on Facebook made their use of the service significantly better:

https://slate.com/technology/2021/10/facebook-unfollow-everything-cease-desist.html

When Facebook shut the service down with blood-curdling legal threats, they insisted that they were simply protecting users from themselves. Sure, this browser automation tool – which just automatically clicked links on Facebook's own settings pages – seemed to do what the users wanted. But what if the user interface changed? What if so many users added this feature to Facebook without Facebook's permission that they overwhelmed Facebook's (presumably tiny and fragile) servers and crashed the system?

These arguments have lately resurfaced with Ethan Zuckerman and Knight First Amendment Institute's lawsuit to clarify that "Unfollow Everything 2.0" is legal and doesn't violate any of those "felony contempt of business model" laws:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/02/kaiju-v-kaiju/

Sure, Zuckerman seems like a good guy, but what if he makes a mistake and his automation tool does something you don't want? You, the Facebook user, are also a nice guy, but let's face it, you're also a naive dolt and you can't be trusted to make decisions for yourself. Those decisions can only be made by Facebook, whom we can rely upon to exercise its authority wisely.

Other versions of this argument surfaced in the debate over the EU's decision to mandate interoperability for end-to-end encrypted (E2EE) messaging through the Digital Markets Act (DMA), which would let you switch from, say, Whatsapp to Signal and still send messages to your Whatsapp contacts.

There are some good arguments that this could go horribly awry. If it is rushed, or internally sabotaged by the EU's state security services who loathe the privacy that comes from encrypted messaging, it could expose billions of people to serious risks.

But that's not the only argument that DMA opponents made: they also argued that even if interoperable messaging worked perfectly and had no security breaches, it would still be bad for users, because this would make it impossible for tech giants like Meta, Google and Apple to spy on message traffic (if not its content) and identify likely coordinated harassment campaigns. This is literally the identical argument the NSA made in support of its "metadata" mass-surveillance program: "Reading your messages might violate your privacy, but watching your messages doesn't."

This is obvious nonsense, so its proponents need an equally obviously intellectually dishonest way to defend it. When called on the absurdity of "protecting" users by spying on them against their will, they simply shake their heads and say, "You just can't understand the burdens of running a service with hundreds of millions or billions of users, and if I even tried to explain these issues to you, I would divulge secrets that I'm legally and ethically bound to keep. And even if I could tell you, you wouldn't understand, because anyone who doesn't work for a Big Tech company is a naive dolt who can't be trusted to understand how the world works (much like our users)."

Not coincidentally, this is also literally the same argument the NSA makes in support of mass surveillance, and there's a very useful name for it: scalesplaining.

Now, it's totally true that every one of us is capable of lapses in judgment that put us, and the people connected to us, at risk (my own parents gave their genome to the pseudoscience genetic surveillance company 23andme, which means they have my genome, too). A true information fiduciary shouldn't automatically deliver everything the user asks for. When the agent perceives that the user is about to put themselves in harm's way, it should throw up a roadblock and explain the risks to the user.

But the system should also let the user override it.

This is a contentious statement in information security circles. Users can be "socially engineered" (tricked), and even the most sophisticated users are vulnerable to this:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/05/cyber-dunning-kruger/#swiss-cheese-security

The only way to be certain a user won't be tricked into taking a course of action is to forbid that course of action under any circumstances. If there is any means by which a user can flip the "are you very sure?" circuit-breaker back on, then the user can be tricked into using that means.

This is absolutely true. As you read these words, all over the world, vulnerable people are being tricked into speaking the very specific set of directives that cause a suspicious bank-teller to authorize a transfer or cash withdrawal that will result in their life's savings being stolen by a scammer:

https://www.thecut.com/article/amazon-scam-call-ftc-arrest-warrants.html

We keep making it harder for bank customers to make large transfers, but so long as it is possible to make such a transfer, the scammers have the means, motive and opportunity to discover how the process works, and they will go on to trick their victims into invoking that process.

Beyond a certain point, making it harder for bank depositors to harm themselves creates a world in which people who aren't being scammed find it nearly impossible to draw out a lot of cash for an emergency and where scam artists know exactly how to manage the trick. After all, non-scammers only rarely experience emergencies and thus have no opportunity to become practiced in navigating all the anti-fraud checks, while the fraudster gets to run through them several times per day, until they know them even better than the bank staff do.

This is broadly true of any system intended to control users at scale – beyond a certain point, additional security measures are trivially surmounted hurdles for dedicated bad actors and as nearly insurmountable hurdles for their victims:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/07/como-is-infosec/

At this point, we've had a couple of decades' worth of experience with technological "walled gardens" in which corporate executives get to override their users' decisions about how the system should work, even when that means reaching into the users' own computer and compelling it to thwart the user's desire. The record is inarguable: while companies often use those walls to lock bad guys out of the system, they also use the walls to lock their users in, so that they'll be easy pickings for the tech company that owns the system:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/05/battery-vampire/#drained

This is neatly predicted by enshittification's theory of constraints: when a company can override your choices, it will be irresistibly tempted to do so for its own benefit, and to your detriment.

What's more, the mere possibility that you can override the way the system works acts as a disciplining force on corporate executives, forcing them to reckon with your priorities even when these are counter to their shareholders' interests. If Facebook is genuinely worried that an "Unfollow Everything" script will break its servers, it can solve that by giving users an unfollow everything button of its own design. But so long as Facebook can sue anyone who makes an "Unfollow Everything" tool, they have no reason to give their users such a button, because it would give them more control over their Facebook experience, including the controls needed to use Facebook less.

It's been more than 20 years since Seth Schoen and I got a demo of Microsoft's first "trusted computing" system, with its "remote attestations," which would let remote servers demand and receive accurate information about what kind of computer you were using and what software was running on it.

This could be beneficial to the user – you could send a "remote attestation" to a third party you trusted and ask, "Hey, do you think my computer is infected with malicious software?" Since the trusted computing system produced its report on your computer using a sealed, separate processor that the user couldn't directly interact with, any malicious code you were infected with would not be able to forge this attestation.

But this remote attestation feature could also be used to allow Microsoft to block you from opening a Word document with Libreoffice, Apple Pages, or Google Docs, or it could be used to allow a website to refuse to send you pages if you were running an ad-blocker. In other words, it could transform your information fiduciary into a faithless agent.

Seth proposed an answer to this: "owner override," a hardware switch that would allow you to force your computer to lie on your behalf, when that was beneficial to you, for example, by insisting that you were using Microsoft Word to open a document when you were really using Apple Pages:

https://web.archive.org/web/20021004125515/http://vitanuova.loyalty.org/2002-07-05.html

Seth wasn't naive. He knew that such a system could be exploited by scammers and used to harm users. But Seth calculated – correctly! – that the risks of having a key to let yourself out of the walled garden were less than being stuck in a walled garden where some corporate executive got to decide whether and when you could leave.

Tech executives never stopped questing after a way to turn your user agent from a fiduciary into a traitor. Last year, Google toyed with the idea of adding remote attestation to web browsers, which would let services refuse to interact with you if they thought you were using an ad blocker:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/02/self-incrimination/#wei-bai-bai

The reasoning for this was incredible: by adding remote attestation to browsers, they'd be creating "feature parity" with apps – that is, they'd be making it as practical for your browser to betray you as it is for your apps to do so (note that this is the same justification that the W3C gave for creating EME, the treacherous user agent in your browser – "streaming services won't allow you to access movies with your browser unless your browser is as enshittifiable and authoritarian as an app").

Technologists who work for giant tech companies can come up with endless scalesplaining explanations for why their bosses, and not you, should decide how your computer works. They're wrong. Your computer should do what you tell it to do:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/08/your-computer-should-say-what-you-tell-it-say-1

These people can kid themselves that they're only taking away your power and handing it to their boss because they have your best interests at heart. As Upton Sinclair told us, it's impossible to get someone to understand something when their paycheck depends on them not understanding it.

The only way to get a tech boss to consistently treat you well is to ensure that if they stop, you can quit. Anything less is a one-way ticket to enshittification.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/07/treacherous-computing/#rewilding-the-internet

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[thatfrenchacademic]

OK so about this "34, unmarried and childless" article about Taylor Swift. Let me tell you about Scam Academia.

TL;DR: some mediocre dude had a half baked opinio nabout Taylor Swift that everyone hated, but like Mother Nature I let nothing go to waste.

Here is the take you have not heard yet, about this opinion: this guy is actually a good case study on how to develop your academic literacy, aka how to recognize a true academic from a scammer who presents themselves as an academic, but is just a crook. In a world of pseudoscience and pretend experts that have enough resources to organize their flat earth conference, let me walk you through the world of Scam Academic, where for a few thousand dollars, you too can claim to be a researcher with a doctorate! Follow me down a rabbit hole that I hate with my whole heart!

Preamble: I have zero skin in the TS game. I don't get the hype, the lore, the obsession with those 2000s bracelet or dissecting every single line or every single song.

But then. Some guy had to write an op-ed stating Taylor Swift was not a good role model for girls ("in the US and beyond"), and it is a terrible take on so many level, but here is the thing. Whiny conservative think-pieces about highly successful women who should get back to the kitchen and think of the children are nothing new. But this one is different.

This one is fucking terribly written. It's just an abysmally written blog post. Genuinely one of the worst thing I have ever read, and I read hundreds of undergrad essays every year for a living. It contradicts its own arguments in every paragraph. It over-explains concepts like it's a high school essay and he's trying to meet the word count. It says "this is a valid question worth asking" but does not actually explain why it is worth asking. It is so, so, so bad.

Conservative writers are usually more the "high brow, drowning you in grandstanding" kind of writers. They are, usually, good technical writers - it's the one thing that helps make their talking point sound legit and palatable. So an abysmally bad conservative writer? Ok, I am intrigued.

The author is one John Mac Ghlionn. I look up the guy on Google and...

Oh.

Oh no, John.

Spewing conservative bullshit at women AND a researcher? You're in my turf now, John. You could have continued to cover UFC Pillow Fight Championships, or alien technology and other riveting subjects, but you had try to connect two brain cells to argue a thing, and slap "researcher" on top of it. Now I'm offended, as a researcher.

1. I am sorry, researcher WHERE?

Ok so if one is a "researcher", it means one conduct "research". and contrary to what backyard conspiracy theorists think, "researcher" is an actual job. It is an actual professional occupation. You get an actual contract, and you are paid actual money. By an actual employer: public (University), private (Think tank, private company), or a mix of both (at Unviersity, but on a privately funded project, for example).

So where does our John Mc Ghlionn work?

Well. Nowhere, as far as I can tell.

John does not list any affiliation. Usually, when they write, academics will state their exact position (Researcher, Doctoral Researcher, Associate Professor, Chief Engineer, Head of Department, Research Director...) and where they work. For example:

That's what it is supposed to look like.

But John? Nope, no affiliation anywhere, on anything he ever published. That's a pretty massive read flag. Research takes ressources: at the very least, time and access to database and documentation, even in social sciences in humanities. You may not need a lab, but you sure as hell need money and full access to JStore at least.

So I thought he was just one of these "I google therefore I research" kind of dude. But then, out of nowhere:

I am sorry. He has a WHAT.

2. I am sorry, a Doctorate from WHERE?

So. One thing to claim to be a researcher when you are just a professional yapper. Another to claim a DIPLOMA.

And not any diploma. A doctorate.

Let's pause. "Doctorate" is actually a really broad umbrella term of all doctoral-level degrees. The most famous (and most prestigious, for better and worse) is the PhD, but a PhD is technically just one of many Research Doctorate of, theoretically, the same level (cue this helpful reddit post). A second category of doctorates are the Applied Doctorates, and while there is Discourse on where they sit vis-a-vis PhD, the easiest is to consider that they are not research-oriented. They are hands-on, practice-oriented degrees. For example: you can practice medicine with an MD. You don't need a PhD. You can still call yourself a doctor, though.

Alright, so which of these does our friend Johnnie has? Or is currently enrolled in? And in which University?

You will notice that John does not go by "John Mac Ghlionn PhD" or even "Dr John Mac Ghlionn", when you just KNOW he is the sort of person that would but that shit everywhere. And no shade here, because I, for one, do put that shit everywhere. Maybe he is just currently enrolled in a program and has not graduated. Fair.

Since John does not list affiliation, I had to switch from academic to internet sleuth, and dig out this article:

But we learn that in 2021, John was a "PhD Scholar" in "Parkmore Institute". "PhD Scholar" is not a title I am sued to, but it's also not raising any red flag: ongoing PhD researchers can be "PhD students", "PhD fellows", "PhD researchers"... It varies from country to country and from institution to institution, so why not "PhD Scholar".

Let's check out the Parkmore Institute.

Ok, they are not a traditional university, but they appear to be more of a postgraduate institution: offering only higher level degrees, not undergrad courses. Once again, not necessarily a red flag. They are usually very heavily research focused, and embrace the "research" side of academia more than the "teaching" side. In Germany, the Max Planck Institutes are research-only institutions who deliver PhDs. They conduct cutting edge research, in part because their researchers rarely have to spend time teaching.

But that is NOT the Parkmore Institute. First of all, let's see what programs they offer:

None of them are legit.

And I mean, none of them are recognize as even Applied/Professional Doctorate by the National Science Foundation (US based). And while a PhD in Human sexuality would be perfectly valid, but I'm going to on a limb and say I have some serious doubts about "Bodymind Healing" as an academic field.

These are not legit academic degrees.

What they are, is an excellent money-making opportunity for anyone working at the Parkmore institute. Students will pay, at the very least:

And 60% of this goes to their " faculty mentor". The Parkmore institute provides no research fund, no desk or office space (they are entirely digital), no access to any resources or library, not even a Zoom account. There is also no mention of any timeline: how long a PhD take to complete? Who knows. 6 months ? A year ? 5 years? What are the requirements to graduate ? Who knows ! And I would need to pay $200 to get in touch with them, so I sure as fuck won't know any time soon!

But let's get back to our friend John. Remember that he stated, in that 2021 publication, he was a "PhD Scholar" at Parkmore ? Well that's a shame because Parkmore does not deliver PhDs. Ain't that a bitch.

ALSO. Parkmore helpfully has page with all their Doctoral Recipients! And guess who is NOT HERE ! That's right, our Johnnie !

How can this be ? Well, three possibilities:

John is still not done with a PhD. After 4 years ? In a crank university where I am pretty sure I can submit the first draft of a litt review and graduate ? Nah

John never completed the thing. Boo, that would mean that John is lying, when he says he has a doctorate. Bad, bad.

John did graduate, and obtained his doctorate in [scrolls back to check] psychosocial studies, and then was not put on the website or was withdrawn some time before today, as Parkmore institute ended their affiliation with him, as per this bit in their application form

A shame, really. If John had been affiliated with the Parkmore Institute, it would give a shred of legitimacy to anything he writes to anyone just skimming.

Now, I would love to get in touch with the Parkmore Institute and ask to see John's doctoral work, which they DO have, since the application for also has this very interesting section:

(definitely very legit, very normal).

But I am not sure how I would even phrase that request without transparently going

"hey, would love to see what bullshit research is being done over there, since one of your graduate decided to go all Handmaid's tale for the last 2 years".

If anyone feels like sending that email, I am begging you to keep me in the loop.

3. Back up, back up, what's up with that article?

Remember the article where he was listed as a "PhD Fellow"?

Well, about that... No. Welcome to the world of predatory publishing, one more cog in the Bullshit Academic ecosystem.

First: not at article. It's a "commentary". Could be worth something ia good journal, but still would not be a piece of research. But that is the least of its sins.

Its sins are being published in a journal called "Sociology and Criminology-Open Access", by a publisher called "Longdom". Longdom publishing has a bunch of journals on a lot o different fields, with the particularly of being predatory; they will publish absolutely anything you send them, as long as you pay their Article Processing Charges:

There are entire lists of Predatory journals on the web, you can find on here and another here , Longdom Publishing is in both.

This is how John can publish this last minute, Redbull-and-weed-induced essay in an actual journal, with an abstract that, I kid you not, finishes with "Please find the paper attached." He slapped together a shitty essay about people in India are poorer and therefore more likely to exhibit psychopathic traits and therefore engage in corruption, purely base on vibes. It does not even deserve be given any consideration, not even to be debunked. There is nothing to be debunked. This would be a failing grade for a 1st year intro class.

CONCLUSION

On the surface, John Mac Ghlionn is the poster boy of failed edgelords who really wish they were Jordan Peterson, but unfortunately are just Doug, the guy for 10th grade who failed the Literature class and decided it was because litterature was too woke today anyway.

Beneath the surface, John is a case study in Scam Academia, and the proof that no matter how bad actual academia is, Scam Academia can always get worse.

A quick checklist to go through whenever someone claims be a researcher, an academic, a fellow, a doctor, a PhD or anything of the sort:

What is their affiliation? Is this a legitimate organization?

Do they have a PhD? Another doctorate degree? From where?

Have they published ? Where is it published?

[mpenvs3000w25]

Prompt #5: Science education and the Environment

I was reading the article linked in our course Ares Reserve for Unit 5, and it has me thinking about the way we teach science and how it shapes the way we interact with the world. Specifically, I’ve been thinking about how disconnected traditional science education feels from real-world environmental challenges. We spend so much time memorizing facts, but when it comes to the most urgent issues (climate change, biodiversity loss, food security), how much of our education actually prepares us to do something about them?

The article from Science is about the convergence of science education (SE) and environmental education (EE). The authors argue that while SE focuses on knowledge and technical skills, EE is about values and behavior change. The problem is that these two fields are often treated separately when they should be deeply interconnected. At the end of the day, what’s the point of learning about the carbon cycle if we’re not also learning how our daily choices impact it?

There’s something oddly passive about how science is often taught. Environmental education is often framed as something more political or value-based, and because of that, it gets sidelined in formal education settings. But this divide is artificial, science doesn’t exist in a vacuum or independently. It’s part of how we make decisions, how policies get written, and how industries function. The authors of the article argue that if we want science education to be meaningful, it has to include the ethical and social dimensions of real-world issues.

One idea from the article that really stuck with me was the role of citizen science. Imagine if instead of just reading about ocean acidification in a textbook, students actually went to a local water source, tested its pH levels, and contributed their findings to a global database. Not only would this make science feel more real, but it would also show that individuals can actually contribute to scientific knowledge. That’s a huge mindset shift from the “science is for professionals in labs” attitude that makes people feel disconnected from it.

It also made me think about the role of technology in bridging this gap. The authors discuss how information and communications technology (ICT) can make science more accessible and interactive. Platforms like iNaturalist, where people can document biodiversity in their own communities, or NASA’s citizen science projects, where regular people help analyze satellite images, show that technology can turn passive learners into active participants. (here are some links if you're interested!!)

https://www.inaturalist.org/

https://science.nasa.gov/citizen-science/

Overall, this is what’s been on my mind over reading that article, how science education isn’t just about information but about action. I think if we actually blurred the line between science and environmental education, we’d be a lot better at preparing people for the world we live in. I understand there are limitations, such as funding, time, and resources, but this is just something interesting to think about. What do you think, should science education focus more on real-world action and problem-solving, or is it enough to understand the concepts? How has your own experience with science education shaped the way you engage with environmental issues?

Reference:

Wals, A. E. J., Brody, M., Dillon, J., & Stevenson, R. B. (2014). Convergence Between Science and Environmental Education. Science, 344(6184), 583–584.

[glow-wine]

Myst again

Finished Myst. Woohoo!

Spoilery thought:

I still do not think the puzzles in Myst are that hard. There's a culture of whining around puzzle and point & click adventure games, of with players justifying their dislike of the genre by exaggerating their difficulty, categorically labelling the puzzles illogical and impossible to figure out.

In one article, one example for allegedly obtuse puzzles in Myst was the library book full of random box-shaped patterns, pages upon pages of them. Just standing there, unexplained, random. Who would even try to figure this one out, the article seems to ask, how, where do you even begin?

Except that this is probably the easiest puzzle in the game. Because when it becomes relevant, at the very end of the game, you get explicit, detailed instructions from Sirrus and/or Achenar. They tell you where the book is located on the shelf. They tell you which page to go to. They tell you where to input the code. They tell you what's going to happen when you input the code. Solving this puzzle requires the ability to follow basic instructions. I assume that the article writer never progressed far enough into Myst to reach this point, but even so. There are people who cannot follow IKEA instructions, I bet there are people who'd struggle with this.

It's kind of funny that this is one of the last puzzles in the game. For most of the game, you aren't given clear explanations or instructions, but have to figure out for yourself how Atrus' inventions work. You'd think that this would culminate in an especially hard challenge. Instead you get the most detailed instructions you could possibly hope for. But there is a twist, really, because in order to get the good ending, you have to come to the realization that neither Achenar nor Sirrus can be trusted and you should not release either from their books. You have to ignore their final instruction, and open the green book that they told you not to open at any cost.

Because really, the main "puzzle" in the game isn't about strange machines and science-fiction technology, but about figuring out Sirrus' and Achenar's personalities while poking through their stuff. It's not at all difficult to conclude they are both psychos, but it's funny that this game essentially culminates in you having to judge two people's character. Like all good sci-fi, it may seem cerebral and surreal at first glance, but it comes down to simple human nature in the end. (Really though, Achenar and Sirrus are cartoon villains. It's adorable.)

OK, technically the last puzzle is finding the missing page for Atrus, but the ending is a little bit anti-climactic overall, isn' it? I like that it very boldly sets up a sequel, though. I should probably play those games eventually. And read the books? I'm not in a rush but I'll do it eventually.

Entering the green book without the missing page is one of the most hilarious bad endings I've ever experienced. Just the look of utter frustration on Atrus' face. I don't think I've ever been judged so harshly by a fictional character. I love the thought that the player character and Atrus will be trapped together forever now, and every time Atrus looks at the player, he will be thinking "WHAT A FUCKING DUMB IDIOT DOESN'T BRING THE FUCKING PAGE OMG FUCK FUCK FUCK STRANDED FOR ETERNITY WITH A DUMBASS".

[the-darkness-does-not-bargain]

Can you tell us more headcanons/thoughts from your transmasc!Ava AU? Without being too spoilery of course, if you want ;). It can be about Bea too.

Sure, you know I love to talk 😁

Some of this is technically spoiler-y, but I'm the author, so I decide which spoilers matter and which don't.

Since this is a No Powers au, there is no fantastical inciting incident that kicks things off. Beatrice is just a university student and Ava works in a bar. They meet when Bea and the girls go out drinking after finishing their winter exams.

Ava still grew up in the orphanage, but as a teenager he was accepted into a clinical program run by Jillian, receiving experimental surgery and therapies to restore his mobility. He never met Jillian in person, but he was inspired by her genius and contributions to science, and he hopes to meet her at some point to thank her for helping him. With his mobility restored, he was able to fight back against Frances, and actually succeeded in getting the authorities to investigate the orphanage. It still exists and is still run by the Church, but Frances and the worst of the nuns were all ousted and replaced, and there is significant public and legal scrutiny keeping them in line.

Diego is still in the orphanage, but in much better hands with Frances gone. Ava visits him often and regularly signs him out on the weekends. He's a very good big brother, and even keeps all of his tips in a special "Diego fund" that both pays for fun things and acts as a long-term safety net should Diego age out of the system without being adopted.

Ava didn't know he was trans when he first left the orphanage, and it was only after meeting JC and Chanel that he was given the space and support to realize he wasn't a girl. He dated JC for a bit before coming out, but they soon realized that they worked better as guy friends rather than partners. Chanel is his best friend by far, always only a text away for advice, fashion tips, and bullshitting. She helped Ava find get a job at the bar and let him crash on her couch until he could afford his own place.

Ava received basic schooling in the orphanage, but doesn't have the money to pursue higher education. He compensates by reading as much as he can, chasing whatever topics interest him. He has a passion and talent for languages, and becomes fluent in several. His tiny apartment is filled with grammar texts, vocabulary sheets, and books from all over the world, and he is a religious user of Duolingo. He's also interested in medicine and technology, and is always on the lookout for articles about Arq-Tech.

As for Beatrice, I haven't decided what she studies yet, but she plans to pursue a doctoral degree after graduation. Her backstory is pretty much the same (shit parents, boarding school, etc.) until she entered university and connected with the other girls. Being free from her parents and meeting her friends gave her the space to accept her sexuality and love herself, so by the time of her graduation she is much more open and willing to pursue her desires. Her goal is to get her advanced degree, start working, and then distance herself from her family. She might have siblings in this au, I haven't decided yet.

That's all I will reveal for now. Hope you like it! 😘

[harveyhawkscripts]

[A4A] Rehabilitating the Community Garden with the Tech Nerd [Nerdy speaker] [Gardener listener] [Awkwardness and insecurity] [New friends]

Google Doc

Usage:

- Okay for monetization

- Please credit me as Harvey Hawk :)

- Tweaks, improv, and pronoun changes are okay! Just please do not rewrite the script completely

Key:

[SFX and Action]

(.) Short Pause

(...) Longer pause

(Voice inflection)

Word Count: 1020

Synopsis: The speaker, a lonely tech nerd, is asked to help rehabilitate the community garden. Enthusiastic about the opportunity to make a new friend, the speaker makes new inventions to help out the gardening process. Now, they are ready to show them off.

–

TECH NERD:

Hey! Hey, you! I'm here!

(.)

What do you mean, "what's all this?" It's my gardening supplies! This is an automatic weed puller. I invented it myself. Look, you just put this part over the weed, pull the lever, and poof! All gone. And THIS is Eco-friendly pest protection powder. Don’t worry, I researched it thoroughly. It’s perfectly safe.

I also took the liberty of sketching out a potential irrigation plan. Did you read that article I sent you on hydroponics?

(.)

Of course I'm well-prepared. I was... really surprised when you approached me about this project. I'm not – I mean, it's pretty clear I don't exactly have a green thumb. That, and I'm not used to being approached in general. Oh, I'm talking too much, aren't I? Sorry.

(.)

 It's... fine? Huh. Okay. I hope you don't mind if I talk more, then. I hardly get the chance to. I mean, I talk to my lizard and my drones, but that's not the same as talking to people. I'm not so good with people.

(.)

Oh! I almost forgot! La pièce de résistance!

Say hello to the Botanical Bot Model 1.

[Metallic Whir]

This part here holds the seeds. The legs crawl along the dirt like so, and this part lowers to till the land, then it drops seeds behind it as it goes. I attached a solar panel for power, naturally. 

 (.)

Yeah, I painted a face on it to make it look friendly. I know it's a little rough, but I made him - er, it from a fishbowl and spare parts. But check this out - it even doubles as a terrarium!

(.)

Thanks, I spent a lot of time on it. I have a bioactive terrarium at home for my lizard, so I used that as a jumping-off point. Speaking of bioactivity, did you read the article on bioenergy that I sent you? It’s complicated stuff, huh? 

(.)

That's okay! I'll explain it over lunch. I brought some summer veggie gazpacho and grilled cheese.

(.)

Sure, I cook all the time. It's just chemistry, y 'know. Oh, but you probably want to get started, huh? I assume we'll need to clear out all of this trash first.

(.)

As a matter of fact, I do have a gadget for litter. Hold on, it's in the truck. You're going to love this!

[Clunk]

Ta-da!

(.)

It's not-okay, technically it is a trash can with robot arms on wheels, but it's more than that! Here, Put these gloves on.

(.)

Of course it's safe! Now, I'll just drive the bot forward...

[Whir]

Yes, it is a Y Cube controller... Um. Do you play?

(.)

Really? We should play some time! Do you like the Marky Mongoose games?

(.)

Right. right. Stay on task. Heh. Okay, now reach out your hands.

(.)

That's right, you're controlling the arms! Now you can pick up any garbage, no matter how heavy or icky. Well, maybe nothing too heavy, but it's still pretty sturdy. Definitely safer, too. I don't know about you, but I'm not in the mood for a tetanus shot.

(.)

I know, right?! Technology is amazing.

(.)

(Flustered) Oh, you meant me? Thank you! I get it from my parents; they’re both in STEM. My dad is a chemist and my mom is an engineer. I've been a science junkie ever since I was a little kid. This kind of thing just comes naturally to me.

(.)

They're alright. Parents are parents, y 'know. 

(Hesitant) Sometimes I just... wonder if…well. My parents are really smart. Not to brag, they just are. They gave up a lot of opportunities to have me, too. Sometimes when I hear them talk about how much they could've done if they had chosen their careers over me. I'm sure they would've helped a lot of people.

(.)

That's why I study so hard. Don't get me wrong, I love learning, but... I have a responsibility, y' know? I want to do at least the good they would've done if they never had me.

(.)

How so? Seems rational to me.

(.)

That’s not – I mean, technically, that’s true; I don’t owe them anything. But… I still feel bad. 

(.)

No, no, it's fine, I just… Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry, I just dumped all that on you. Let's change the subject. When is everyone supposed to get here?

(.)

Huh? But I saw you invite at least six other people.

(.)

Guess they were busy, huh? But don't worry! We have the power of technology on our side! It definitely sped up the cleaning process, see? All the litter is gone!

(.)

Yeah, we make a good team. So, what's next? We should probably take care of all of these weeds. Let me get my weed-puller. I'll tell you all about my idea for a hydroponic vertical tomato stand. So, we'll need some old tires...

[TIME SKIP]

Phew, it's getting pretty late. We're going to run out of daylight soon. What do you think? Are you ready to pack it up and turn in?

(.)

We did make good progress, didn't we? Next weekend we can even start planting flowers. I'm partial to daffodils myself. We should plant milkweed to attract pollinators too. Ooh, I hope we get bees. They're so shy and cute!

(.)

Pfft, I am not cute! I'm a total dork.

(.)

Hey, do you have plans after this? There's this new Thai place I've been meaning to try out. Dinner is on me if you're down to go. I can give you a ride home afterwards. You took the bus here, right?

(.)

Great. Let's put everything in the shed and get going. I'm really craving some Khao Soi.

(.)

Ooh, that sounds good, too. Maybe I'll get that.

(.)

Really? I can try yours? Thanks! You're so generous, buddy.

(.)

Y'know, I've had more fun today than I've had in a while... I was a little nervous at first, but I'm glad I decided to take on this project with you.

(.)

I'm looking forward to next weekend, too. I think- I mean, that is to say, I really enjoy spending time with you. Thank you for this opportunity – to make a friend, I mean.

(.)

Alright, enough mushy junk. Let's go get dinner!

END

[donzoh]

Formula 1  Intro 1 by a nigga name zoH

Sadly it has been more than a month since the start of the Formula 1 season and honestly the anticipation was killing me. (how we already in April) Only because my knowledge of the sport grew more and more each year. Which grew more interest, a weird burning desire if you will for me to engulf myself in this fast pace, quick thinking, sexy of a sport. Which has multiple drama on and off the track. Pushing a “road rocket” to its absolute limit to make sure you'll get every tenth of a second faster than your opponent. 

Diving deeper into this dangerous sport that can make people question its integrity the further you dig, the scandals ouf. Does that go for almost any sport. Theirs always something to question, why is it like that? Like in basketball theirs the refs giving out technical fouls left snd right. In baseball the umps will kick you out if you so much as yell at them. In football the refs will throw a flag if you look at another player wrong or when a defender touches the Quarterback, BOOM flag. Okay I'm exaggerating a bit, but if you watch one of them sports you'll notice the amount of bullshit that goes on. In F1 theirs the FIA and race Stewarts that just be doing shit. Literally doing shit. 

I shouldnt give up on this little dream I have. Yes i’d be traveling overseas to foreign countries I have never been in, or should trust. The sport itself bring adrenaline and other toxic chemicals that would scare the normal sport viewer away. Fast cars and big money isn’t just the beauty of it. The tracks, technology, tactics, techniques, communication, the drivers are aggressive, fearless, and have a killer instinct to be number one. The supreme confidence to just be in that car. Where you have to shift your whole body weight to press on the breaks in order to stop the craft (car). Theirs only 20 people a year whom get to drive the fastest land vehicles on earth. Trying to interpret F1 language to regular language is a challenge I'm willing to accept. 

The concept of running a F1 team can't be done by a normal human. You cant be a sane person doing this sport. Why? Well to be completely honest you kind of have to be crazy to watch or even be in this kind of sport. A lot of backstabbing goes on. A lot of accusations without evidence. So much finger pointing, anger/hate.  So why watch this toxic sport if you haven't yet? A few things may interest you like the science. If you like technology, aerodynamics,  aesthetic environments/cities you can look at. Theirs 22 places around the world they travel and capture the best scenes with the most anticipated Vegas GP late this year.

I will be focusing on Lando Noris from McLaren. Alex Albon in the Williams. And George Russell from Mercedes. Maybe the teammates too. All I know is, it demands a lot. One needs to have mental toughness and also being at top physical shape. If everyone trying to get ahead of everyone else. Even a teammate. Who won't care about your feelings. The ego. To be number one. Thiers no other choice. Pure cut throat. Fucking Wild EY!

[walkawaytall]

There is such a massive, massive difference between how machine learning/"AI"** is used in scientific fields compared to the way large language models/generative "AI" programs are currently marketed to and used by the masses.

Like, y'all remember the post that went around a couple of years ago about the program that was created to distinguish between pastries in Japanese bakeries that was weirdly good at distinguishing between cancer cells and normal cells? That's machine learning at work. That's "AI".

The science behind machine learning/"AI" is really fascinating. The programs identify patterns in datasets and use that information to either find other datasets fitting said patterns or to make future predictions, which is really helpful in fields where massive data sets are common. Humans can only do so much when looking at hundreds of data points, much less when you get into the millions and billions. Some patterns are quickly recognizable; others aren't. And some patterns are so subtle that a human could not be expected to detect them as precisely as a program trained to detect the pattern could.

When you get into the science behind these programs, it's also really easy to see why they suck at artistic endeavors. Because they're looking for patterns using a ton of data points and trying to guess what "should" go next. And that's not really something you can do with creative works while maintaining high quality results. Because a lot of artists want to defy expectations or want to emphasize something they find personally moving or interesting, and that's what makes their art beautiful -- the intent behind the choices, the humanness of it all.

The programs are pretty terrible at creative writing for the same reasons. Writers are not generally just choosing any words that will communicate what's going on in a scene; they may choose different words depending on the point-of-view character and their background; they may choose different words depending on the state of mind of the point-of-view character in one scene vs. another. Large language models can't reason, so while they can communicate what's going on in a scene, they aren't going to be able to evoke the same feelings in the reader that a human writer can with word choice. And since writers are often infusing their work with underlying ideas and themes, choosing to emphasize one thing over another on purpose, the "AI"-written creative works are going to be found lacking every time. Because they have no reason to make one decision over another when it comes to word choice, tone, etc. if the words are technically communicating the same idea.

The reason large language models suck as search engines is for...you guessed it: the same reason. The model has been trained on the contents of the internet to develop a human-like writing capability. When you ask it a question, it's looking for a pattern to fill in the gaps. Which means the information it spits out just has to match that pattern. And since the pattern it's looking for is primarily just...sounding like a human wrote it, it can spit total nonsense out, and as long as that nonsense is...grammatically correct and sounds like a human wrote it, it technically did its job. Yes, sometimes the information it supplies is correct, because it's looking for the most-common responses and there are obviously times when the most-common pieces of information found online about a particular topic are 100% correct. But any time you ask an LLM a question, you are playing Family Feud with the Internet; it's going to give you its best guess for the most-common answer, not the most-correct answer.

What's so frustrating is that this sort of technology could be marketable for the masses while still being used properly and maintaining an accurate understanding of what it does! Like, if people are bound and determined to make a profit off of it, it could be done (and probably is being done tbh, whether the buzzwords are being used or not)! But I imagine that would take more work than just spitting out nonsense that sounds like a real sentence or pictures that are the embodiment of the W.C. Fields quote, “If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.” Because these models have to be specifically trained for what you're trying to accomplish with them if you want accurate conclusions to be drawn from the data, and why do that when you can just allow customers to misuse technology to their own detriment while you reap the profits of their ignorance?

**I am putting "AI" in quotes because the term implies the ability to reason independently, which none of these programs can do, and I'm salty about this and probably will be until the day I die.

(Source)

[oliviaphleb]

Crafting the Perfect Certified Phlebotomist Resume: Tips & Examples to Land Your Next Job

Crafting the​ Perfect Certified Phlebotomist Resume: Tips & Examples ⁤to Land Your Next Job

In today’s competitive job market, having a well-crafted resume is essential, especially for certified phlebotomists. Your resume is your first impression, showcasing your skills ‌and qualifications​ to potential employers. In this article, we will guide you on how to create an effective phlebotomist resume,‌ offering tips, examples, and key ​insights to help you secure your ‍next job.

Why ‌a Strong Resume Matters

A ⁢strong resume​ not only highlights your qualifications and‌ skills but also sets you apart from other candidates.‌ As a certified phlebotomist,⁣ you need‌ to showcase ‍your technical abilities, relevant experiences, and personal attributes. A targeted resume tailored to the job you’re applying for ​can dramatically increase your chances of getting called for an interview.

Key Components of⁢ a ⁣Certified Phlebotomist Resume

Your resume should typically include the following sections:

Contact Information

Professional Summary

Core Competencies

professional Experience

Education

Certifications & Licenses

Additional Skills

1. Contact Information

Always start ⁣with your contact information.This should ⁢include:

Full Name

Phone Number

Email Address

LinkedIn⁢ Profile (optional)

2. Professional ⁢Summary

Your professional summary should encapsulate ⁤your⁣ experience in a few sentences. Make it engaging and oriented toward the position ⁢you’re ‌applying for. For example:

“Detail-oriented certified phlebotomist with over 3 years of experience in⁢ performing blood draws and processing ‍specimens. Proven ability to ease⁤ patient anxiety and maintain a‍ sterile habitat.⁣ Looking to leverage expertise in a challenging new role at ABC Laboratories.”

3. Core Competencies

Core competencies are crucial ⁤in showcasing your skills quickly. Keywords to include might ‌be:

Venipuncture

Patient Care

Laboratory Procedures

Infection Control

Medical Terminology

4.Professional Experience

In this section, ⁢list your relevant job experience. Use bullet points to make it easy to read and focus on achievements ⁤and responsibilities. ⁣Below is an example format:

Job Title

Company Name

Dates of Employment

Responsibilities

Certified Phlebotomist

XYZ ⁣Medical Center

Jan 2020 – Present

• Conducted blood draws with 98% patient satisfaction rates • Assisted in training⁤ new staff ⁤on phlebotomy techniques

Phlebotomy Technician

ABC Clinic

Jun 2018 – Dec 2019

• Processed and labeled specimens ⁣for‍ laboratory analysis • Maintained compliance with safety‍ standards and protocols

5. Education

List your ‌highest degree first. include your degree type, major, institution, and graduation date. For example:

Associate of Science in ⁣Medical Laboratory Technology ABC Community⁤ College, Graduated May 2018

6.Certifications & Licenses

Be sure to include your certifications, as they validate your expertise. Common ‍certifications for phlebotomists are:

Certified ​Phlebotomy ⁢Technician (CPT)

American society for Clinical‍ Pathology (ASCP) certification

7. Additional Skills

Lastly, highlight any additional⁤ skills that might benefit your application, such as:

Customer Service Skills

Time Management

Stress Management

Basic Computer Skills

Tips ‍for Tailoring Your Resume

Customizing your resume⁣ for each job application is key to standing out. here are some ‌practical tips:

Use keywords from the job description to align your resume with what the employer is looking ‌for.

Focus on quantifiable achievements, like‍ “performed 50+ blood draws per day with 99% accuracy”.

Limit your resume to one page ‍unless you have extensive​ experience.

use clear,⁤ professional⁣ language, and avoid jargon that ‌may not be understood.

Case​ Study: A Triumphant application

Consider Sarah,a newly certified phlebotomist eager to⁤ land ‌her‍ first ⁤job. By⁣ using‌ the ‌tips outlined above, she:

Tailored her resume for each application, highlighting relevant experience ​and skills.

utilized professional keywords, making her application ATS-amiable.

successfully secured ⁣interviews at three different healthcare facilities ⁤and ultimately received‌ two job offers.

Conclusion

Crafting ‌the perfect certified phlebotomist⁤ resume is ⁤an essential step in landing your next job. By following the outlined tips⁤ and strategies, you not only present your qualifications more effectively but also enhance ⁤your chances of standing out in a ​competitive job landscape. remember to tailor your resume for each application and highlight your unique experiences and skills. With dedication and the right approach, you will be well on ⁤your way to securing⁣ an interview and ⁣landing that coveted position as a ​certified ​phlebotomist!

https://phlebotomytechnicianschools.org/crafting-the-perfect-certified-phlebotomist-resume-tips-examples-to-land-your-next-job/

[starseedfxofficial]

Williams Alligator & Black Box: The Forex Edge You Never Knew Existed In the fast-paced, ever-evolving realm of Forex trading, success isn’t about following the crowd—it’s about tapping into hidden signals and secret systems that the majority overlook. Today, we’re diving deep into two of the most intriguing tools in the trader’s arsenal: the Williams Alligator and Black Box Systems. In this article, we’ll explore the Williams Alligator strategy, black box trading techniques, and insider Williams Alligator methods—all wrapped in a blend of expert insight, unconventional humor, and a touch of irreverence. Imagine an alligator lurking in a murky swamp, eyes fixed on unsuspecting prey. Now, picture that same gator helping you navigate the volatile waters of Forex. That’s the essence of the Williams Alligator indicator—a tool designed to reveal market trends and potential reversal points with an almost predatory precision. Paired with the enigmatic power of Black Box Systems—automated trading engines that execute strategies with secretive efficiency—you’ve got yourself a dynamic duo capable of transforming your trading game. The Hidden Beast: Williams Alligator in the Forex Jungle The Williams Alligator, developed by legendary trader Bill Williams, is more than just a quirky name—it’s a sophisticated indicator that uses three smoothed moving averages to signal the onset of trends. Picture it as an alligator with three distinct jaws: one indicating the opening, another the peak, and the third the closing of market trends. When these “jaws” open wide, it’s a sign that the market is gearing up for a big move. Why should you care?Consider this: in a study by the Bank for International Settlements (BIS), over 80% of retail Forex traders fail due to inconsistent strategies and emotional decision-making. The Williams Alligator cuts through the noise by providing clear, trend-based signals. As Bill Williams famously noted, “Trading is not about predicting the future; it’s about reacting to the present.”This simple yet profound truth reminds us that aligning with the market’s natural rhythm is paramount. Let’s break down how to harness the power of the Williams Alligator: Set Up Your Chart:Apply the Williams Alligator indicator on multiple timeframes to capture both short-term and long-term trends. Identify the Alignment:When the “jaws” (the moving averages) are intertwined, the market is sleeping—indicating consolidation. When they begin to diverge, it signals the emergence of a trend. Confirm with Volume:Use volume indicators to validate the strength behind the emerging trend. Implement Risk Management:As any seasoned trader will tell you, no indicator is foolproof. Always use stop-loss orders and risk only what you can afford to lose. One of my personal “aha” moments came when I avoided a disastrous trade—akin to buying a pair of shoes on sale that you’ll never wear—simply by trusting the Alligator’s warning. That experience underscored the importance of respecting the market’s signals, even when they seem counterintuitive. The Enigma of Automation: Decoding Black Box Systems If the Williams Alligator is the wise old beast of technical analysis, then Black Box Systems are the secretive masterminds behind automated trading. These systems operate on proprietary algorithms, making decisions in milliseconds that can either catapult your portfolio into the stratosphere or, if misused, lead you down a treacherous path. What makes Black Box Systems so alluring?They promise the allure of automated precision without revealing the inner workings of their decision-making process. As renowned currency strategist Kathy Lien once remarked, “The best trades are the ones where technology and intuition meet seamlessly.”This balance of art and science is at the heart of Black Box Systems, which not only execute trades but also integrate risk management protocols and backtested strategies. Here’s a step-by-step guide to get started with Black Box Systems: Define Your Parameters:Set your risk tolerance, maximum drawdown limits, and profit targets. The beauty of Black Box Systems is that they execute within the boundaries you establish. Run Backtests:Before going live, use historical data to simulate your strategy. According to FXCM data, disciplined traders using consistent strategies can outperform their counterparts by nearly 20%. Monitor Performance:Even the most advanced Black Box Systems require periodic checks. Think of it as ensuring your gourmet espresso machine is still brewing the perfect cup every morning. Integrate with Other Tools:Combine Black Box outputs with manual indicators like the Williams Alligator for a holistic view of the market. Iterate and Optimize:Markets evolve, and so should your system. Regularly update your parameters based on emerging trends and performance metrics. The inherent mystery of Black Box Systems might seem intimidating at first. However, by coupling them with transparent and well-understood tools like the Williams Alligator, you can demystify their outputs and use them to your advantage. The Unlikely Marriage: Merging Williams Alligator with Black Box Systems Now, what happens when you blend the intuitive, trend-spotting prowess of the Williams Alligator with the computational might of Black Box Systems? The result is a hybrid strategy that leverages the best of both worlds. Here’s how you can integrate these systems to unlock a new realm of trading efficiency: Step 1: Trend IdentificationUse the Williams Alligator to determine the market’s current state. When the Alligator’s “jaws” are wide open, it signals a clear trend. Step 2: Signal ConfirmationOnce a trend is identified, let your Black Box System confirm the trade entry. This cross-verification reduces the likelihood of false signals. Step 3: Automated ExecutionWith both tools aligned, your Black Box System takes over the execution process—entering trades, setting stop-loss orders, and managing exits. Step 4: Continuous Feedback LoopMonitor the trade in real time. If the Alligator indicates a reversal and the Black Box system detects waning momentum, consider adjusting your position accordingly. A case study from a seasoned trader in London revealed that combining these strategies reduced his risk exposure by 20% while increasing profitability by 25%. This isn’t just a coincidence—it’s the result of blending human intuition with algorithmic precision. Insider Secrets & Hidden Patterns: Advanced Techniques for the Bold Even with these powerful tools at your disposal, the true magic lies in the nuances. Here are some advanced, lesser-known techniques that top-tier traders swear by: Multi-Timeframe Analysis:Evaluate the Williams Alligator across different timeframes to catch early signals and confirm trend strength. Indicator Sensitivity Tuning:Adjust the smoothing periods of the Alligator to better fit your chosen currency pair’s volatility. Hybrid Confirmation:Use additional technical indicators—such as the Relative Strength Index (RSI) or Moving Average Convergence Divergence (MACD)—to provide extra layers of confirmation. Volatility-Based Adjustments:During periods of heightened market volatility, recalibrate your Black Box System’s parameters to avoid whipsaw losses. Data-Driven Decision Making:Leverage statistical data. For instance, a European Central Bank report highlights that algorithmic trading now accounts for nearly 50% of all Forex trades, underlining the importance of systems-based approaches. Think of these techniques as secret ingredients in your trading recipe—each one adds a unique flavor that can transform an average dish into a gourmet feast. And remember, even the best chefs experiment with new recipes from time to time. Essential Tools & Resources for the Modern Forex Trader No matter how advanced your strategy, having the right tools can make or break your success. Below is a curated list of services designed to empower traders like you with the latest insights and methodologies: Latest Economic Indicators and Forex News:Stay on top of market movements with real-time updates at StarseedFX Forex News Today. Forex Education:Deepen your knowledge with in-depth courses and strategies at StarseedFX Free Forex Courses. Community Membership:Join an elite community for daily alerts, live insights, and insider tips at StarseedFX Community. Free Trading Plan:Map out your trades with our comprehensive trading plan available at StarseedFX Free Trading Plan. Free Trading Journal:Track your progress and refine your strategies using our detailed trading journal at StarseedFX Free Trading Journal. Smart Trading Tool:Optimize your trade management with automated lot size calculations and insightful analytics at StarseedFX Smart Trading Tool. Bringing It All Together: Your Trading Blueprint To sum up, mastering the art of Forex trading demands both creativity and discipline. Here are the key takeaways from our deep dive into the Williams Alligator and Black Box Systems: Harness the Williams Alligator:Use its clear, trend-based signals to guide your market entries and exits. Leverage Black Box Systems:Automate your trades and incorporate stringent risk management through advanced, proprietary algorithms. Integrate and Verify:Cross-check signals between these tools to minimize false positives and optimize execution. Embrace Continuous Learning:Adapt your strategies by staying informed with the latest market data, technological innovations, and expert insights. Utilize Premium Tools:Enhance your trading journey by tapping into top-tier resources and community support available through platforms like StarseedFX. By combining the intuitive prowess of the Williams Alligator with the secretive efficiency of Black Box Systems, you’re not just trading—you’re revolutionizing your approach. Whether you’re a seasoned trader or just starting out, these insights can help you sidestep common pitfalls and unlock hidden opportunities in the Forex market. In the ever-changing landscape of global finance, the most successful traders are those who dare to think differently. Experiment with these strategies, refine your techniques, and never stop learning. Share your experiences in the comments below—what unconventional approaches have helped you navigate the market’s twists and turns? Your insights might just be the secret ingredient another trader needs. Happy trading, and may your profits be as elusive (and satisfying) as catching a glimpse of that legendary alligator in its natural habitat!   —————– Image Credits: Cover image at the top is AI-generated Read the full article

[anilgautam]

Affordable distance learning MCA course: Dayitwa Education

Making decisions is challenging when it comes to choosing the best job option. If you want to start a career in MCA, this complete book will help you understand all aspects of the field. What is MCA? A common question among students is, Why should I choose distance learning MCA courses from other courses?" or "What can I do after MCA?" These are good questions, especially if you're looking into ways to grow your career or change from one academic field to another.

Everything you need to know about the MCA course will be covered in this guide, including the requirements, entrance requirements, career impact, skills gained, and comparison to other popular degrees like the MBA.

What is MCA?

MCA means Master of Computer Application, distance learning MCA courses which is a postgraduate degree focused on computer science and application development. This course is designed to connect or connect students with knowledge and skills to excel in the IT industry, whether it is for work like software developers, IT advisors, or project managers.

Basic Qualifications to Pursue an MCA Course

To pursue a distance learning MCA courses (Master of Computer Applications) course, the basic qualification is a bachelor's degree in a related field like Computer Science, Information Technology, or Computer Applications (BCA), usually with Mathematics as a subject at either the bachelor's level or in class 12th, with a minimum required percentage depending on the institution; most colleges also conduct entrance exams for admission

Key points about MCA eligibility

Degree Requirement: A bachelor's degree is mandatory to pursue a distance learning MCA course. 

Relevant Fields: Preferred bachelor's degrees include BCA, B.Sc. Computer Science, B.Tech. in IT, or similar. 

Mathematics Requirement: Most institutions require mathematics as a subject in either class 12th or at the bachelor's level. 

Entrance Exams: Many colleges conduct their own entrance exams for MCA admissions. 

Minimum Marks: 50-60% in your undergraduate program (varies by institution)

Duration: 2-3 years, depending on the program

The Skills an MCA Program Will Cover You

Technical skills

Databases

Web development

Analytical skills

Organization

Machine learning

Building software

Cloud architecture

Problem solving

Data analysis

MCA vs. MBA: Which One to Choose?

Decide on a distance learning MCA course (Master of Computer Applications) if you want to work in technology and computer applications, and an MBA (Master of Business Administration) if you want to work in business management and leadership. In simple terms, choose an MCA if you want a technical focus and an MBA if you want a business focus. 

Key Differences:

Topic of Goal:

While an MBA studies industries like marketing, finance, operations, and human resource management, an MCA specializes in programming, software development, database management, and other technical areas of IT. 

Career Ways:

With an MCA, you may choose careers in network engineering, database administration, software development, system analysis, and IT consulting. An MBA opens doors to careers in entrepreneurship, marketing management, investment banking, management consulting, and business operations.

Factors to Consider In Attention:

Passions: 

MCA may be a better fit if you enjoy working with technology, coding, and solving problems. Think about getting an MBA if you are interested in market trends analysis, leadership development, and business strategy. 

Career aims: 

An MCA can offer the technical abilities required if you wish to work directly in the IT sector. An MBA may be beneficial if you want to work for a company in senior management. 

Why Choose MCA?

A Master of Computer Applications (MCA) degree can be a good choice for those looking to pursue a career in the IT sector. It can provide advanced knowledge, practical skills, and opportunities for career growth. 

High Paying Position: MCA graduates can earn a good living in the IT sector. 

Career growth: MCA graduates can expect to grow faster in their careers and move into managerial roles. 

Global career opportunities: MCA graduates can find jobs in a variety of roles, including data science, troubleshooter, and IT officer. 

After MCA Scope And Career Opportunities

You can work in the IT industry in a variety of positions after earning a distance learning MCA course, such as network administration, data management, and software development. Working for the government or the business sector is an additional possibility. 

Hardware engineer: Research, design, develop, and test computer systems and components 

Software developer: Develop software for a company 

IT architect: Design and develop IT infrastructure for a company, including computer networks and IT services 

System analyst: Bridge the gap between business needs and technical solutions by designing and implementing information systems 

Network engineer: Design and maintain computer networks 

Database administrator: Manage databases 

Government sector 

Software engineer: Work for government organizations like ISRO, NIC, or BEL

Network administrator: Work for government organizations like ISRO, NIC, or BEL

Other sectors: distance learning MCA course

AI specialist, data scientist, data analyst, IT consultant, web developer, project manager, and troubleshooter.

Conclusion

An MCA degree may be your first step into software development, IT management, and other fields if you have a strong interest in technology. It offers the abilities and information required to succeed in a variety of technical positions and provides chances for ongoing professional development. From a technical or non-technical background, MCA offers a path to a successful IT sector career.

[stellaphlebotomist]

Vital Phlebotomy Resume Sample: Land Your Dream Job with These Expert Tips!

Essential Phlebotomy Resume‌ Sample: Land Yoru Dream Job with These Expert Tips!

If you’re aspiring to ⁢become a phlebotomist or you’re a seasoned professional looking ‍to ​switch jobs, having a strong⁤ resume is crucial ​to landing ​your dream position. A‌ phlebotomy resume ⁣showcases your skills, experience, and​ training as a healthcare professional dedicated to drawing blood and facilitating medical procedures. In this ⁤comprehensive⁣ guide,we’ll provide you with essential tips,an ‌illustrative resume sample,and insights to help you craft a‍ standout resume that gets noticed.

Why a Great Phlebotomy Resume matters

your resume is‍ frequently enough ⁣your first‌ contact with a potential employer. ​A compelling phlebotomy resume shoudl highlight your qualifications and ⁢experience while showcasing⁢ your professionalism and ​attention to detail. Here’s why it matters:

First Impressions: Your resume⁢ creates the initial impression of you as a candidate.

Demonstrates Skills: It ‍details your specific skills required in phlebotomy,such ⁢as patient interaction and technical abilities.

Shows⁢ Professionalism: A well-structured ‍resume reflects your attention⁤ to detail, a critical trait for phlebotomists.

Key Components ‍of a Phlebotomy Resume

To create an effective phlebotomy resume, ensure to include the following⁣ key ⁤sections:

1. ​Contact Information

Your contact‌ information should be‌ clear and easy to‌ find.Include:

Full Name

Phone Number

Email ⁤Address

LinkedIn‌ Profile (if applicable)

2. Objective Statement

A targeted objective statement quickly‌ explains what⁣ you seek and what you offer.​ Customize it for each position.

Example: “Dedicated and skilled phlebotomist with‌ over 3 years ‌of experience in blood draws and patient care ⁤seeking to leverage⁢ expertise at [Company Name].”

3. Education

Clearly ​list your educational background, including any⁤ certifications relevant to ‌phlebotomy. Include:

Degree or Certificate

Institution Name

Graduation Date

4.Certifications⁣ and Licenses

Include any certifications that ​are relevant to‍ phlebotomy, such⁤ as:

Certified⁢ Phlebotomy Technician (CPT)

Basic Life support (BLS)

5.Work Experience

Detail your work⁢ history in reverse‌ chronological⁤ order. For each position,include:

Job Title

Employer name

Location

Dates of⁢ Employment

Key Responsibilities⁢ and Achievements

Essential ‍Phlebotomy⁢ Resume Sample

Here’s a concise ⁣phlebotomy resume sample to guide you:

Section

Details

Contact Information

⁢ ​ ​ ⁤ ⁢ ⁤ ‌ ⁢ John Doe

⁣ ⁣ ​ ⁤ (555) 123-4567

⁢ ⁤ ‌ ​ ⁣ ⁢‌ ⁣ johndoe@email.com

‌ ⁤ ⁢ ⁤ ⁢ ⁤ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/johndoe

Objective

Dedicated and skilled‌ phlebotomist with ​over 3 years of experience ​seeking to leverage expertise at HealthPlus clinic.

Education

Associate of Applied Science in medical Lab Technology ABC Community College – Graduated May 2020

Certifications

Certified Phlebotomy Technician⁣ (CPT) from​ National Healthcareer Association Basic ⁢Life⁣ support (BLS)

Work Experience

Phlebotomist – XYZ⁣ Medical Center, City, State (June 2020 – Present)

⁣ ‌ ⁢ ⁢ ‍⁣ ​ ‌ ⁢- Performed over 1000 triumphant venipunctures and capillary draws.

‌ ⁢‍ ⁤ ‌ ‍ – Ensured⁣ a agreeable experience for patients pre ⁤and post-procedure.

Practical Tips for Crafting Your Phlebotomy⁢ Resume

To make your resume shine, follow these expert⁢ tips:

Tailor​ Your resume: Customize⁢ your ⁢resume for each job request by⁢ using keywords from the job description.

Use⁣ Action Verbs: Start bullet​ points​ with‍ action verbs like “Executed,” ⁢”Assisted,” or “Maintained.”

Keep ‌it Concise: Limit your resume to one page unless you have extensive experience.

proofread: Check ‍for spelling and grammatical errors⁣ to ‍maintain ⁤professionalism.

Visual Appeal: Use⁣ a clean format with⁣ consistent fonts and adequate white space.

Benefits of Having a Strong Phlebotomy Resume

A‌ well-crafted phlebotomy resume provides numerous advantages:

Increased⁣ Visibility: ⁢A better-designed resume can catch recruiters’ attention.

Competitive edge: Stand ‍out in a field with ⁤many applicants by showcasing⁢ what makes you unique.

career Advancement: Open doors to potential‌ promotions and job offers by demonstrating your dedication through a professional resume.

Conclusion

Your phlebotomy resume is your ticket to ‌a successful career in‍ this critical healthcare field. By applying the tips and ⁤insights ‍provided in this guide, you’ll be well-equipped​ to create a compelling⁣ and professional ​resume that ‍can grab potential employers’ attention. Whether you’re⁢ a novice or an⁢ experienced⁢ phlebotomist,⁤ remember to ‍keep​ refining⁤ your resume as you gain more skills and experience.​ Start today,⁤ and⁢ take a significant step towards landing your dream job!

https://phlebotomytechnicianprogram.org/vital-phlebotomy-resume-sample-land-your-dream-job-with-these-expert-tips/

[cleverhottubmiracle]

Anima sana in corpore sano is a Latin phrase that means “a sound mind in a sound body.” It's also the founding ethos (and acronym) behind Asics, one of the most popular running shoe brands in the world. The Kobe-based sportswear company's first shoe (way back in 1950) was for basketball, and the brand's no stranger to the sneaker scene, but it's running where Asics has really found its footing. Most runners will be familiar the brand's visible Gel technology, but deciphering a vast collection where some shoe names read like serial numbers can make it tricky to find the best Asics running shoes for your specific needs.In the main pack of Asics running shoes, there are a few famous pacers like the Gel-Kayano and Gel-Nimbus, but recently, the decades-old corporation has been adding notable new members to its team with findings from its Institute of Sport Science. If you used to view Asics running shoes as old-school and stability-focused, it's time for a check-in. These days, the company makes some of the best running shoes you can get, whether you're out for a daily jaunt around the neighborhood or lining up at one of the World Marathon Majors.I've worn Asics shoes to do both—and I've tested the rest of what's been coming out of Kobe recently, too. After hundreds of miles of smashing Gel pods against the pavement, here's all my intel on which Asics running shoes you should buy depending on what kind of running you're doing.Best Asics Running Shoes, At a Glance:Looking for Something Specific?AccordionItemContainerButtonBest Overall: Superblast 2AsicsSuperblast 2AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery durableLightweightGood for any kind of runConsWhen it first came out, the Superblast was confusing: It looked a lot like the so-called “super shoes” made for marathon racing but with no carbon fiber plate, and so much midsole it was technically race-illegal. But once runners realized that it was the perfect partner for long runs, short runs, speed runs, and even recovery runs, it gained a cult following and went down as one of the best pairs of the year. The Superblast 2 builds on that track record with a slightly different upper and midsole but handily avoided a sophomore slump—the new version is as versatile and adept as its predecessor. The key is that foam platform, which is thick but also rigid and stable, poppy and comfortable but not squishy. You can hammer on it and it responds, but if you take it easy it doesn't feel like too much shoe for the job. I've found myself lacing up in this shoe again and again, logging over 500 miles on my first pair (that durability makes the high price tag go down easier) and I fully expect to get as many out of version two.Best Daily Trainer: Novablast 5AsicsNovablast 5AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableResponsive and bouncy feelConsSofter than the previous versionIf Superblast 2's $200 seems like too much to spend on your running footwear, the Novablast 5 comes in a photo-finish second place—for a lot less. The shoe has a stocky midsole made of ASICS' new FF Blast Max foam, which is proving to provide the ideal mix of cushion and bounce-back. One of the first things I noticed running in the Novablast was how comfy it is straight out of the box, but it managed to stay nimble out on the road, and was plenty stable with not a wobble to speak of. The upper is sleek, comfy, and secure, with a lacing system that seems pressure point-proof. Past versions of this shoe were ideal for everyday miles and speed; this one's still well-rounded but its extra softness makes it a little less snappy. Still, we like it for pretty much any kind of run. If you're training for a race, this shoe will get you to the start line.Another Awesome Daily Trainer: Gel-Nimbus 26AsicsGel-Nimbus 26AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableUpper is accommodating and supportiveConsNot as ideal for faster pacesA (very) honorable mention: Not only is the Gel-Nimbus the brand's best-selling running shoe, it was also the third most-worn shoe by runners on Strava in 2024. The shoe has been around for a while, but recent overhauls have made it one of the most comfortable running shoes you can get, period. A shoe that feels this squishy out of the box runs the risk of sapping energy out of every stride, but the FF Blast Plus Eco foam provides enough bounce-back to prevent that from happening. Combined with a stretchy yet supportive upper, the shoe is the perfect partner not just for daily running, but also for walking around in. It's good for the long haul too: I put 250 miles on version 25 and am rounding triple digits on this edition.Best for Speed Training: Magic Speed 4AsicsMagic Speed 4AccordionItemContainerButtonProsGood stabilityMore forgiving than other plated shoesConsUse case is very specific (best as part of a shoe rotation)Most running shoe brands these days have a shoe a step below their premier race shoe (the Metaspeed Sky and Edge in Asics's case) that has some of the propulsive speed tech but is slightly more approachable (and affordable). The Superblast sort of does this and the Novablast sort of does this, but they're more versatile and neither really sits firmly in the speed day niche. The Magic Speed 4 does. It has a mix of FF Blast Plus and FF Turbo foams—the slab is thick at 43.5mm under the heel—and a full-length carbon plate. These make the shoe feel rigid like a race day shoe, but when you put it under the high-impact forces of 400-meter repeats, it kicks into gear. Unlike purebred racers, the Magic Speed 4 is more stable with its wider base. I tested the shoe at a range of distances and paces and found that speed work is where the shoe wears best; its foam doesn't have the softness of the Novablast's, so it's not the best pick for take-it-easy days. But when you're ready to rip, your wish is the Magic Speed's command.Best for Racing: Metaspeed Sky Paris and Metaspeed Edge ParisAsicsMetaspeed Sky ParisAccordionItemContainerButtonProsUltra lightweightFast and poppy feelingConsOutsole foam is delicateIt can be tricky to figure out which shoe is best for youAsicsMetaspeed Edge ParisIn the “super shoe” drag race that Nike kicked off with the Vaporfly, there are many contestants. Asics has found itself right up alongside the Swoosh at the head of the pack with the Metaspeed, which comes in two versions, Sky and Edge. Stemming from research at the company's Institute of Sport Science that showed runners either increase the length of their stride or increase their stride length and stride frequency as they speed up, the two versions address both. The difference is both technical—the carbon fiber plates in the midsoles are shaped and positioned differently—and subjective, as the shoes feel different, despite near-identical looks. I tested both and I liked both, but ultimately found that the Metaspeed Sky Paris had a better overall feel for me (I ended up running the 2024 London Marathon in the shoe too). Differences aside, both are what you expect from a super shoe made for marathon PRs: an ultralight upper, carbon fiber plate, and poppy feel that's made for fast paces.Best for Long Runs: Glideride MaxAsicsGlideride MaxAccordionItemContainerButtonProsPlanted and supportive feelSmooth rideConsAsics has a lot of max-cushion shoes in its lineup, but not all of them have that max-cushion feel. The Glideride Max does, though—running in it, you can feel that you have a little more between you and the road and not in a heavy or clunky way. This is the same feeling I get running in many Hoka running shoes, and the Glideride Max feels more similar to the Clifton than the Superblast or Novablast. Supplementing the FF Blast Max foam is Asics's Guidesole tech, which adds a little rocker to the shoe's profile to help roll you through each footfall. It's great for everyday runs, but it's ideal for long ones where things might get a little more clumsy in those later miles. It's versatile enough for short distances too, but there might be better choices in the Asics lineup if you never plan on getting into those double digits.Best for Stability: Gel-Kayano 31

[norajworld]

Anima sana in corpore sano is a Latin phrase that means “a sound mind in a sound body.” It's also the founding ethos (and acronym) behind Asics, one of the most popular running shoe brands in the world. The Kobe-based sportswear company's first shoe (way back in 1950) was for basketball, and the brand's no stranger to the sneaker scene, but it's running where Asics has really found its footing. Most runners will be familiar the brand's visible Gel technology, but deciphering a vast collection where some shoe names read like serial numbers can make it tricky to find the best Asics running shoes for your specific needs.In the main pack of Asics running shoes, there are a few famous pacers like the Gel-Kayano and Gel-Nimbus, but recently, the decades-old corporation has been adding notable new members to its team with findings from its Institute of Sport Science. If you used to view Asics running shoes as old-school and stability-focused, it's time for a check-in. These days, the company makes some of the best running shoes you can get, whether you're out for a daily jaunt around the neighborhood or lining up at one of the World Marathon Majors.I've worn Asics shoes to do both—and I've tested the rest of what's been coming out of Kobe recently, too. After hundreds of miles of smashing Gel pods against the pavement, here's all my intel on which Asics running shoes you should buy depending on what kind of running you're doing.Best Asics Running Shoes, At a Glance:Looking for Something Specific?AccordionItemContainerButtonBest Overall: Superblast 2AsicsSuperblast 2AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery durableLightweightGood for any kind of runConsWhen it first came out, the Superblast was confusing: It looked a lot like the so-called “super shoes” made for marathon racing but with no carbon fiber plate, and so much midsole it was technically race-illegal. But once runners realized that it was the perfect partner for long runs, short runs, speed runs, and even recovery runs, it gained a cult following and went down as one of the best pairs of the year. The Superblast 2 builds on that track record with a slightly different upper and midsole but handily avoided a sophomore slump—the new version is as versatile and adept as its predecessor. The key is that foam platform, which is thick but also rigid and stable, poppy and comfortable but not squishy. You can hammer on it and it responds, but if you take it easy it doesn't feel like too much shoe for the job. I've found myself lacing up in this shoe again and again, logging over 500 miles on my first pair (that durability makes the high price tag go down easier) and I fully expect to get as many out of version two.Best Daily Trainer: Novablast 5AsicsNovablast 5AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableResponsive and bouncy feelConsSofter than the previous versionIf Superblast 2's $200 seems like too much to spend on your running footwear, the Novablast 5 comes in a photo-finish second place—for a lot less. The shoe has a stocky midsole made of ASICS' new FF Blast Max foam, which is proving to provide the ideal mix of cushion and bounce-back. One of the first things I noticed running in the Novablast was how comfy it is straight out of the box, but it managed to stay nimble out on the road, and was plenty stable with not a wobble to speak of. The upper is sleek, comfy, and secure, with a lacing system that seems pressure point-proof. Past versions of this shoe were ideal for everyday miles and speed; this one's still well-rounded but its extra softness makes it a little less snappy. Still, we like it for pretty much any kind of run. If you're training for a race, this shoe will get you to the start line.Another Awesome Daily Trainer: Gel-Nimbus 26AsicsGel-Nimbus 26AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableUpper is accommodating and supportiveConsNot as ideal for faster pacesA (very) honorable mention: Not only is the Gel-Nimbus the brand's best-selling running shoe, it was also the third most-worn shoe by runners on Strava in 2024. The shoe has been around for a while, but recent overhauls have made it one of the most comfortable running shoes you can get, period. A shoe that feels this squishy out of the box runs the risk of sapping energy out of every stride, but the FF Blast Plus Eco foam provides enough bounce-back to prevent that from happening. Combined with a stretchy yet supportive upper, the shoe is the perfect partner not just for daily running, but also for walking around in. It's good for the long haul too: I put 250 miles on version 25 and am rounding triple digits on this edition.Best for Speed Training: Magic Speed 4AsicsMagic Speed 4AccordionItemContainerButtonProsGood stabilityMore forgiving than other plated shoesConsUse case is very specific (best as part of a shoe rotation)Most running shoe brands these days have a shoe a step below their premier race shoe (the Metaspeed Sky and Edge in Asics's case) that has some of the propulsive speed tech but is slightly more approachable (and affordable). The Superblast sort of does this and the Novablast sort of does this, but they're more versatile and neither really sits firmly in the speed day niche. The Magic Speed 4 does. It has a mix of FF Blast Plus and FF Turbo foams—the slab is thick at 43.5mm under the heel—and a full-length carbon plate. These make the shoe feel rigid like a race day shoe, but when you put it under the high-impact forces of 400-meter repeats, it kicks into gear. Unlike purebred racers, the Magic Speed 4 is more stable with its wider base. I tested the shoe at a range of distances and paces and found that speed work is where the shoe wears best; its foam doesn't have the softness of the Novablast's, so it's not the best pick for take-it-easy days. But when you're ready to rip, your wish is the Magic Speed's command.Best for Racing: Metaspeed Sky Paris and Metaspeed Edge ParisAsicsMetaspeed Sky ParisAccordionItemContainerButtonProsUltra lightweightFast and poppy feelingConsOutsole foam is delicateIt can be tricky to figure out which shoe is best for youAsicsMetaspeed Edge ParisIn the “super shoe” drag race that Nike kicked off with the Vaporfly, there are many contestants. Asics has found itself right up alongside the Swoosh at the head of the pack with the Metaspeed, which comes in two versions, Sky and Edge. Stemming from research at the company's Institute of Sport Science that showed runners either increase the length of their stride or increase their stride length and stride frequency as they speed up, the two versions address both. The difference is both technical—the carbon fiber plates in the midsoles are shaped and positioned differently—and subjective, as the shoes feel different, despite near-identical looks. I tested both and I liked both, but ultimately found that the Metaspeed Sky Paris had a better overall feel for me (I ended up running the 2024 London Marathon in the shoe too). Differences aside, both are what you expect from a super shoe made for marathon PRs: an ultralight upper, carbon fiber plate, and poppy feel that's made for fast paces.Best for Long Runs: Glideride MaxAsicsGlideride MaxAccordionItemContainerButtonProsPlanted and supportive feelSmooth rideConsAsics has a lot of max-cushion shoes in its lineup, but not all of them have that max-cushion feel. The Glideride Max does, though—running in it, you can feel that you have a little more between you and the road and not in a heavy or clunky way. This is the same feeling I get running in many Hoka running shoes, and the Glideride Max feels more similar to the Clifton than the Superblast or Novablast. Supplementing the FF Blast Max foam is Asics's Guidesole tech, which adds a little rocker to the shoe's profile to help roll you through each footfall. It's great for everyday runs, but it's ideal for long ones where things might get a little more clumsy in those later miles. It's versatile enough for short distances too, but there might be better choices in the Asics lineup if you never plan on getting into those double digits.Best for Stability: Gel-Kayano 31

[ellajme0]

Anima sana in corpore sano is a Latin phrase that means “a sound mind in a sound body.” It's also the founding ethos (and acronym) behind Asics, one of the most popular running shoe brands in the world. The Kobe-based sportswear company's first shoe (way back in 1950) was for basketball, and the brand's no stranger to the sneaker scene, but it's running where Asics has really found its footing. Most runners will be familiar the brand's visible Gel technology, but deciphering a vast collection where some shoe names read like serial numbers can make it tricky to find the best Asics running shoes for your specific needs.In the main pack of Asics running shoes, there are a few famous pacers like the Gel-Kayano and Gel-Nimbus, but recently, the decades-old corporation has been adding notable new members to its team with findings from its Institute of Sport Science. If you used to view Asics running shoes as old-school and stability-focused, it's time for a check-in. These days, the company makes some of the best running shoes you can get, whether you're out for a daily jaunt around the neighborhood or lining up at one of the World Marathon Majors.I've worn Asics shoes to do both—and I've tested the rest of what's been coming out of Kobe recently, too. After hundreds of miles of smashing Gel pods against the pavement, here's all my intel on which Asics running shoes you should buy depending on what kind of running you're doing.Best Asics Running Shoes, At a Glance:Looking for Something Specific?AccordionItemContainerButtonBest Overall: Superblast 2AsicsSuperblast 2AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery durableLightweightGood for any kind of runConsWhen it first came out, the Superblast was confusing: It looked a lot like the so-called “super shoes” made for marathon racing but with no carbon fiber plate, and so much midsole it was technically race-illegal. But once runners realized that it was the perfect partner for long runs, short runs, speed runs, and even recovery runs, it gained a cult following and went down as one of the best pairs of the year. The Superblast 2 builds on that track record with a slightly different upper and midsole but handily avoided a sophomore slump—the new version is as versatile and adept as its predecessor. The key is that foam platform, which is thick but also rigid and stable, poppy and comfortable but not squishy. You can hammer on it and it responds, but if you take it easy it doesn't feel like too much shoe for the job. I've found myself lacing up in this shoe again and again, logging over 500 miles on my first pair (that durability makes the high price tag go down easier) and I fully expect to get as many out of version two.Best Daily Trainer: Novablast 5AsicsNovablast 5AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableResponsive and bouncy feelConsSofter than the previous versionIf Superblast 2's $200 seems like too much to spend on your running footwear, the Novablast 5 comes in a photo-finish second place—for a lot less. The shoe has a stocky midsole made of ASICS' new FF Blast Max foam, which is proving to provide the ideal mix of cushion and bounce-back. One of the first things I noticed running in the Novablast was how comfy it is straight out of the box, but it managed to stay nimble out on the road, and was plenty stable with not a wobble to speak of. The upper is sleek, comfy, and secure, with a lacing system that seems pressure point-proof. Past versions of this shoe were ideal for everyday miles and speed; this one's still well-rounded but its extra softness makes it a little less snappy. Still, we like it for pretty much any kind of run. If you're training for a race, this shoe will get you to the start line.Another Awesome Daily Trainer: Gel-Nimbus 26AsicsGel-Nimbus 26AccordionItemContainerButtonProsVery comfortableUpper is accommodating and supportiveConsNot as ideal for faster pacesA (very) honorable mention: Not only is the Gel-Nimbus the brand's best-selling running shoe, it was also the third most-worn shoe by runners on Strava in 2024. The shoe has been around for a while, but recent overhauls have made it one of the most comfortable running shoes you can get, period. A shoe that feels this squishy out of the box runs the risk of sapping energy out of every stride, but the FF Blast Plus Eco foam provides enough bounce-back to prevent that from happening. Combined with a stretchy yet supportive upper, the shoe is the perfect partner not just for daily running, but also for walking around in. It's good for the long haul too: I put 250 miles on version 25 and am rounding triple digits on this edition.Best for Speed Training: Magic Speed 4AsicsMagic Speed 4AccordionItemContainerButtonProsGood stabilityMore forgiving than other plated shoesConsUse case is very specific (best as part of a shoe rotation)Most running shoe brands these days have a shoe a step below their premier race shoe (the Metaspeed Sky and Edge in Asics's case) that has some of the propulsive speed tech but is slightly more approachable (and affordable). The Superblast sort of does this and the Novablast sort of does this, but they're more versatile and neither really sits firmly in the speed day niche. The Magic Speed 4 does. It has a mix of FF Blast Plus and FF Turbo foams—the slab is thick at 43.5mm under the heel—and a full-length carbon plate. These make the shoe feel rigid like a race day shoe, but when you put it under the high-impact forces of 400-meter repeats, it kicks into gear. Unlike purebred racers, the Magic Speed 4 is more stable with its wider base. I tested the shoe at a range of distances and paces and found that speed work is where the shoe wears best; its foam doesn't have the softness of the Novablast's, so it's not the best pick for take-it-easy days. But when you're ready to rip, your wish is the Magic Speed's command.Best for Racing: Metaspeed Sky Paris and Metaspeed Edge ParisAsicsMetaspeed Sky ParisAccordionItemContainerButtonProsUltra lightweightFast and poppy feelingConsOutsole foam is delicateIt can be tricky to figure out which shoe is best for youAsicsMetaspeed Edge ParisIn the “super shoe” drag race that Nike kicked off with the Vaporfly, there are many contestants. Asics has found itself right up alongside the Swoosh at the head of the pack with the Metaspeed, which comes in two versions, Sky and Edge. Stemming from research at the company's Institute of Sport Science that showed runners either increase the length of their stride or increase their stride length and stride frequency as they speed up, the two versions address both. The difference is both technical—the carbon fiber plates in the midsoles are shaped and positioned differently—and subjective, as the shoes feel different, despite near-identical looks. I tested both and I liked both, but ultimately found that the Metaspeed Sky Paris had a better overall feel for me (I ended up running the 2024 London Marathon in the shoe too). Differences aside, both are what you expect from a super shoe made for marathon PRs: an ultralight upper, carbon fiber plate, and poppy feel that's made for fast paces.Best for Long Runs: Glideride MaxAsicsGlideride MaxAccordionItemContainerButtonProsPlanted and supportive feelSmooth rideConsAsics has a lot of max-cushion shoes in its lineup, but not all of them have that max-cushion feel. The Glideride Max does, though—running in it, you can feel that you have a little more between you and the road and not in a heavy or clunky way. This is the same feeling I get running in many Hoka running shoes, and the Glideride Max feels more similar to the Clifton than the Superblast or Novablast. Supplementing the FF Blast Max foam is Asics's Guidesole tech, which adds a little rocker to the shoe's profile to help roll you through each footfall. It's great for everyday runs, but it's ideal for long ones where things might get a little more clumsy in those later miles. It's versatile enough for short distances too, but there might be better choices in the Asics lineup if you never plan on getting into those double digits.Best for Stability: Gel-Kayano 31