#taronegertonfanfiction

[writingformadderton]

Reflections

Ship: Taron x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2,006

Summary: While searching for a dress for an upcoming event, you start to feel insecure about your body. It truly takes a toll on you, and Taron catches you in a vulnerable state. (TW!! Insecurities, Body Image, Negative Self-Talk!!)

Author's Note: Fluff, angst, and love!!! First fic posted in a good while, ahhhhh. I'm so nervous for you guys to read this bc I wrote and edited this one alone. This topic hit extremely close to home for me as I have body image issues as well, so I hope it is actually good for you guys! I truly hope you enjoy it. Happy reading! -Miya💜

Requested by Anon:

“I’ve gained 25 pounds Dasia! And the wedding is in 2 weeks!” I grumble out loud to my phone while standing in front of my mirror. Dasia, one of my sisters, was on Facetime with me while I tried on dozens of dresses in my walk-in closet. Our best friend was getting married in 2 weeks and I thought I had something to wear. But I was clearly wrong.

“Stop it! You look gorgeous! What about that sunflower colored dress you bought like a year ago but never wore? I’m pretty sure the tag is still on it.” Dasia throws out another suggestion, while also trying on her own dresses in her home. She gives her body a once over in the dress, but then shakes her head and walks away from her phone to retrieve another option. I study my body in a crucifying manner, the grimace on my face evident.

I look awful. How did I let myself get to this point?

“It probably won’t fit over my disgusting thighs, not to mention my stomach.” The words roll off my tongue, but immediately bring pain to my chest. I run my hands from my chest down to my stomach, the current red maxi dress hugging the new curves in ways I didn’t like.

I turn to the side and try to hide the belly, but the open back catches my attention immediately. I gasp with horror as I catch a glimpse of the newly occurring love-handles settling in. I quickly face front and sigh in despair.

I feel just as bad as I look. I can’t believe I let myself go like this.

I close my eyes and try to hug my body to offer comfort, but my subconscious was eating away at me silently.

Dasia walks back into camera view and studies herself in her full body mirror. Her body now dawning a gorgeous pale blue dress with a high slit. “How about this one for me? I know we can’t wear her colors, but maybe she’ll make an exc- “

Her voice trails off as her attention turns to me on Facetime. She walks closer and kneels in front of the device.

I open my eyes and feel tears start to well up. A shaky breath leaves my lips and my hands grip the dress at the sides, trying to ground myself.

“Darling, look at me.” Dasia calls out to me, a soft expression resting on her face.

I look towards my phone and fight back a sniffle. I look down at the floor in shame.

“Are you in your head, letting your thoughts beat you down?” She asks gently.

“Dasia, I feel like shit. I mean look at me. Who’s gonna want to take pictures with me? No matter what dress I wear, I’m gonna get unwanted attention!” I blurt out harshly. Dasia looks taken aback, but sighs softly.

“Hunny, cut yourself some slack. You have been so busy these last couple months with the new house and job. Taron still thinks you are the most gorgeous specimen walking, for gods sake!” She tries to coax me into cheering up. But my subconscious had already gotten the best of me. I was hearing her words, but none of them stuck.

“Until he doesn’t. Then what?” I spoke just barely loud enough for her to hear. I look in the mirror once more, and it breaks my heart. Shoulders slouching in defeat as my brain betrays my heart with the thoughts running through it. “I…I gotta go. I’ll call you tomorrow and we can decide on something.” I say without a second thought. I walk over and grab my phone, giving her one last glance.

“Sweetheart, please don’t be too hard on yourself. You are beau- “ She tries to finish her sentence, but I hang up quickly. She closes her eyes and sighs. “I love you.” She whispers to herself.

The tears begin to flow freely and my breathing becomes ragged. A sob pours out from my mouth as I sink to the floor and discard my phone. “Fuck!” I yell out. I sit against my wall and try to stop the stream of tears falling. But the more ragged my breathing became, the more the task proved to be too difficult.

Pathetic.

It rings through my head over and over as I try to catch my breath. My heart aches painfully as my mind becomes my worst enemy.

How could I let this happen?

I sit for a half hour until the tears finally stop and my breathing calms down. I tapped my phone screen.

4:30. Taron will be home soon. I need to get dinner started.

With a deep breath, I grab my phone and pick myself up off the floor. I take off the dress still hugging my body and hang it back up. I rub my face and change into shorts and a tee, turning off the light to my walk-in closet once exiting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taron unlocks the front door and walks into the house, a grin on his face as he enters. He had been bombarded with meetings all day for this upcoming film and all he wanted to do was get back to his love. He takes off his shoes by the door. “Honey, I’m home!” He calls out with a chuckle. He looks up and observes the main entry way.

 It’s quiet….too quiet.

“(Y/N)! Are you here?” He calls out again. No answer again.

His eyebrows furrow together as he walks towards the dining room. The smell of home cooking coated the air, but no food nor I sat waiting for him. He walks into the kitchen, but to no avail I was not there. Going over to the stove, he noticed pots filled with freshly cooked sides and the oven light illuminated to reveal the main dish sitting patiently for consumption.

Where is my lovely girlfriend? The thought came to the forefront of his mind. Pulling himself away from the stove, he left the kitchen and searched the living room. Nothing.

He lets out a small sigh and pulls his phone from his back pocket. He quickly dials my number and listens to the ringing. Faintly, my ringtone sounds to his ears and he looks around. He slowly starts following the sound while holding his own phone in his hand. He makes his way upstairs.

“Babe! Baby!” He calls out to me. Now, he was starting to worry. Why weren’t you answering?

But I don’t answer him. I can barely hear him over the sound of my own sobs.

I sit on the floor of my shower, crying uncontrollably as the hot water crashed against my body. I had been in that same position for almost 15 minutes. I’ve tried to pull myself together and get out, but my attempts were met with more tears.

After cooking dinner for myself and Taron, I tried to motivate myself to put something on my stomach. But after what happened earlier, I couldn’t bring myself to swallow anything other than water. So, I left the cooked food on and in the stove, waiting to be served. I wandered back upstairs to take a shower and clear my mind.

Maybe the hot water could wash away my troubles.

15 minutes later, my body was clean, but I couldn’t stop crying. Faintly, I hear my phone ring from inside the bedroom. It was probably Taron calling. I take a deep breath and close my eyes, tears stinging as they fall freely. I hear Taron calling my name. but my voice is too hoarse to respond. So, I continue to sob quietly.

Taron finally makes it into the bedroom and sees the phone on the floor. Raising his eyebrows, he ends the call and picks it up, placing it on top of the dresser. His ears focus on the sound of running water and his attention turns to the bathroom door. He quickly walks in and as his eyes land on my figure, his heart aches.

He quickly makes his way over to the shower and opens the glass door, turning off the water and kneeling down to hug me tight. I wrap my arms tight around his body and take in his scent.

“What happened to you, my love?” He speaks softly, rubbing my back. I respond in a sniffle and tighten my hold on his body. I needed the comfort so badly, and his arms always felt safe. “It’s alright, I’m home now. Everything’s alright.” He says and kisses my temple. I nod and loosen my grip to look in his eyes.

Taron brings his hands to my face and gently holds me, thumbs caressing the sides of my face with such care and tenderness. I melt into his touch, closing my eyes and calming down little by little. He sits with me just like that for a while before I open my eyes once more.

“Hey babygirl.” His lips pull into a small smile when he sees the action. I nestle my face into his hands as a response. “Are you okay to get out of the shower?” He asks in the gentlest voice I have ever heard.

I nod slowly with soft eyes. He smiles and kisses my forehead, slowly standing up and stepping onto the floor mat. He holds out his hands, and I take them happily. After standing, Taron tells me to wait for a second while he grabs a towel. While watching him, my heart flutters as he is set in taking care of me without even knowing the problem.

He comes over with a warm towel and dries me off with the utmost care. I don’t give him any resistance as he does the task. Instead, I take in how soft he is and how he admires my body for what it is. It almost makes me feel ashamed for how I was feeling earlier. I slightly cower away, and he notices the action and slowly stands tall. He wraps the towel tightly around my body and wraps his arms around my waist. Mine wrap around his neck and look into his eyes.

“What’s troubling you, my love?” He whispers while rubbing small circles on my back. I lightly blush and break eye contact, looking down in shame. But he brings one hand to my chin and gently lifts my head with his finger. “No need to hide from me, love.”

Taking a deep breath and clearing my throat, I finally speak after what had felt like hours of crying. “I was feeling in-insecure about my body after trying to find a d-dress for the wedding.” I force the words out of me in a small voice. I see the concern, but a loving aura reflects in Taron’s eyes after I spoke.

He leans down, closes his eyes and kisses me, gentle yet passionate. It slightly catches me off guard, but I immediately melt into the kiss. He pulls away and lays his forehead on mine, looking at me. My eyes remain closed for a bit, then finally open to those blue-green orbs I love the most.

“You know you are the most beautiful girl in this world.” He speaks with confidence.

“Yea, but Taron-“

“No buts darling. You have the body of a goddess. And no matter what you look like, I will always love and adore you.” He says in a firm, but soft manner. He places a kiss on my nose to solidify his statements.

I blush hard and bury my face in his neck. “Do you promise?” I whisper, my heart fluttering and growing warm.

“I promise, my love.” He reassures and rubs my back. My eyes began to water and I hold him tighter. “I love you, from now until the end of time. You will always be beautiful to me, no matter what.” Taron whispers, placing another kiss on my temple.

“I love you too, Taron.” I speak just loud enough for him to hear.