#taking spyro to educate him on lesbians

[plasticbabyart]

Idiot boy failure and his lesbian girl best friend, who’s gonna tell him ?

[glittertomb]

Do you play video games?

With varying intensity, yeah, since I was a babe. My dad was a video game nerd so I started on weird Atari games and old pc games like commander keen, pinball, ones I can’t even remember the names of... maybe geck? Then my parents went on a big, “video games are bad, but educational games are cool” kick, so I played 4 different Oregon trail games, 3 different Carmen San Diego games, 2 magic school bus games, and an assortment of random ones like spooky haunted witch teacher who hid the students unless you solved puzzles, girl gang vs plants taking over the world, samurai actor teaching you Japanese, biking through Aztec ruins, or kids who could transform into animals exploring history, myths, and monsters.

Then my parents divorced and had a “Christmas war” so my dad got a Dreamcast and my mom 1-upped him by getting a PlayStation... lots of sonic, Ecco the dolphin, crazy hp and Disney games, kingdom hearts, Klonoa, Raymond, Mario kart, cookie and cream, star fox, crazy taxi, wacky racers, Zelda, etc. Then my mom got anti-video games again and I would secretly sneak out to play Spyro and Kirby and Pokémon and the sims (to live out my wild lesbian fantasies).

Then in college I got into seiken densetsu, final fantasy, spore, fallout, and lots of indie humble bundle games like aquaria, limbo, bastion, sword and sworcery, too many to remember. Then I was too busy for a bit so I would play phone games in my spare time, but later got into Skyrim, the last of us, animal crossing, Katari damashi, nino kuni, Witcher, and more indie games. And recently I’ve played moving out, hitman, eufloria, stardew, the gardens between, trine, hades, fe, moon hunters, spiritfarer, deltarune, earthbound, a short hike, evil tonight, dragonquest, trials of mana remake, super crush k.o., acnh, and ori. Plus so many I can’t remember in the moment.

But a bro will be like, you don’t play elden ring? You don’t play smash or halo or call of duty? Then you don’t game, bro.

So no, I don’t play video games.