#taking a walk in nature is a need for my sanity
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la-cocotte-de-paris · 2 months ago
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Of the simplest pleasures in life, which among them are your favorites?
EATING A FRESH FUCKING BAGUETTE. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THIS PAST NEAR-FULL YEAR HAS BEEN SANS LES VRAIES BAGUETTES
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lillmirey · 18 days ago
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„The Weight of the Truth“
summary: in which Emily relays on her Girlfriend
Pairing: Emily Prentiss x Fem!Reader
Content Warning: Season 17 plot line used. fluff
Word Count: 1,2k
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The BAU was quiet that night, the kind of silence that rang louder than the chaos the team usually endured. Emily Prentiss sat at her desk, the warm glow of her desk lamp highlighting the exhaustion etched into her face. You, her long-time girlfriend, had promised to meet her at Quantico to help her unwind after a particularly grueling week. You often joked that dating the Unit Chief of the BAU meant being her second-in-command when it came to maintaining her sanity.
But tonight, you could tell something was different.
The moment you stepped into her office, Emily’s eyes lifted to meet yours, and you could see the storm brewing behind them. Her lips quirked into a faint smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Hey,” you greeted softly, closing the door behind you. You placed the takeout bag on her desk and walked over, your hands naturally finding her shoulders to knead out the tension. “You look like you’ve been carrying the weight of the world today.”
Emily leaned into your touch but didn’t respond immediately. Instead, she closed her eyes, savoring the fleeting comfort you offered.
“You always know,” she murmured, her voice barely audible.
“Of course I know,” you replied. “I know you better than anyone, Em.”
For a while, she let you work on the knots in her shoulders, the room enveloped in a comfortable silence. But then she spoke, her tone unsteady.
“(Y/N)… there’s something I need to tell you.”
You stilled, sensing the shift in the air. You moved to sit in the chair across from her, reaching for her hands.
“Whatever it is, we’ll handle it together,” you assured her.
She looked down at your joined hands, her thumb brushing over your knuckles. “This week has been… complicated. The team found out some things about me that I’ve been keeping under wraps. Things I never wanted to come out.”
You frowned, your mind racing. “What do you mean?”
Emily’s gaze lifted, the vulnerability in her eyes cutting you to your core. “Before I joined the BAU—before I even met you—I was… recruited by an international organization. It was supposed to be temporary, just a few undercover missions. But those missions turned into something darker, something I’ve been trying to bury ever since.”
Your heart clenched at the weight of her words, but you didn’t interrupt.
“One of those missions involved planting false evidence,” she continued. “It was supposed to take down a dangerous criminal network, but the fallout… it ruined lives. And now, it’s come back to haunt me. Someone leaked my involvement, and the team—” She broke off, her voice cracking.
“They’re questioning you,” you finished for her.
She nodded, her jaw tight. “They say they understand, but I can see the doubt in their eyes. I’ve worked so hard to lead this team with integrity, and now it feels like everything I��ve built is falling apart.”
You let her words sink in, the gravity of the situation hitting you like a ton of bricks. Emily Prentiss was the strongest person you knew, but even she had her limits.
“Emily,” you said, your voice firm. “I don’t care about your past. I care about who you are now. And the woman I see in front of me is brave, compassionate, and willing to do whatever it takes to protect the people she loves.”
Tears glistened in her eyes, but she blinked them away. “You say that now, but what if—”
“No,” you interrupted, squeezing her hands. “I’m not going anywhere, no matter how messy things get. You don’t have to carry this alone.”
Emily’s lips parted as if to argue, but the look in your eyes stopped her. For once, she allowed herself to lean on you, the walls she so carefully constructed crumbling just a little.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
You stood, pulling her into a tight embrace. She clung to you, burying her face in the crook of your neck.
“I love you, Emily,” you murmured. “And we’re going to get through this. Together.”
--------------------------------------------------------
The fallout from Emily’s past continued to loom over the team in the weeks that followed. Tension was high, and trust was strained. You could see how it weighed on her, the constant scrutiny taking its toll.
One evening, you found her sitting on the couch in your shared apartment, staring blankly at the wall. You slid in beside her, tucking yourself under her arm.
“Bad day?” you asked gently.
She let out a heavy sigh. “They caught the leak, but the damage is done. I can tell the team’s still wary. And maybe they should be. Maybe I’m not the leader they deserve.”
“Don’t say that,” you said firmly. “You’ve saved more lives than I can count, Emily. You’ve made mistakes, sure, but that doesn’t erase all the good you’ve done.”
She looked at you, her eyes searching yours for reassurance. “What if I can’t fix this? What if I lose everything I’ve worked for?”
“You won’t lose me,” you said softly.
That night, as you lay in bed together, you held her close, letting her feel the steady rhythm of your heartbeat. It was a silent promise—a reminder that no matter what happened, she wasn’t alone.
--------------------------------------------------------
Months passed, and Emily slowly began to rebuild the trust she thought she’d lost. The team rallied around her, proving that the bonds they shared were stronger than any shadow from her past.
And you were there every step of the way, reminding her of her worth, of the love that surrounded her.
One evening, as you stood in the kitchen cooking dinner, Emily walked in, a rare smile gracing her lips. She wrapped her arms around your waist from behind, pressing a kiss to your temple.
“What’s this for?” you asked with a laugh.
“For being you,” she replied simply. “For sticking by me when I wasn’t sure I deserved it.”
You turned in her arms, cupping her face. “You deserve the world, Emily Prentiss. Don’t ever doubt that.”
In that moment, she realized that no matter how dark her past might be, the future was brighter because you were in it.
And for the first time in a long time, she felt at peace.
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t-a-a-1 · 11 days ago
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Counting Stars
TFP Optimus x Female Reader
Summary: After a dangerous mission where you almost die, Optimus breaks up with you without knowing you are carrying his sparkling. It's not until seven months later that the universe allows you both to meet once again.
A/N: Lots of yearning, jealousy, delusions, craving, fluff. All that good stuff.
5K
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Counting Stars
...
He almost lost you. 
And yet he had to act like he didn't care.
It was to everyone's surprise when he announced that you will no longer be living at the base. It was simple. Due to inner conflicts, you won't be a part of Team Prime any longer. 
No one believed it until you came to pick up your things and said your last goodbyes. 
Optimus was nowhere to be found. 
And no one dared to ask him why.
Only Optimus knows the reason. 
He was well aware of his limits. Knowing that the moment he sees you, he would break down. Throw away his pride and ask you to stay forever with him. That he was a complete idiot to believe he could live a single day without you.
What an idiot he indeed is. 
It's been a week and he can't do it. Primus, give him strength. He sees you everywhere. He smells you in the flowers, feels your touch in the wind, hears your voice in nature and sees you in the stars. How much he misses to taste your lips once more.
"One more day and I think you will go offline, old friend."
Out of embarrassment, Optimus tries to close the windows in the data-pad screen, he was too focused on looking at pictures of you to notice Ratchet walking close to him. 
“What, um-”  He keeps closing tabs, each one having a different picture of you. From different angles and expressions. Blurry and not. “What are you referring to, old friend?”
Ratchet doesn't know how to react to this. He has always been aware of Optimus' massive love for you. Of course he knew. Even more now that the bearer of the Matrix can’t seem to function properly without your presence. 
Optimus keeps closing taps and Ratchet gets a glimpse of Orion Pax. Trying his best to hide the fact that he messed up. 
From innocent pictures, more intimate ones appeared.
“Would you please close your optics?” There is some panic and concern in his voice. But also an authoritative tone to it.  “I do not wish for you to see her the way I used to.”
Ratchet just turns around, giving Optimus enough privacy to conclude his activity. 
“I had just wanted to check up on your well-being due to recent events. But I am afraid that you are in a worse state than I thought possible.”
He hears more clicking and typing before hearing a heavy ex-vent coming from the Autobot leader.
“You can turn around now.”
“Optimus, you can’t continue like this,” the robot medic takes a look at the screen again. It’s empty but the blue blush on Optimus’ face is still evident.  “It’s only been a week. But have you truthly imagined what your life will be after living an eternity without (y/n)?”
Of course he doesn’t think about it. He might be an idiot but not entirely stupid. If he spirals and thinks too much about it he’ll probably lose all sense of responsibility and sanity. He can’t think about no longer being able to see the stars in your eyes. Of not longer hearing the sweetness of your voice or caressing the softness of your skin–
“There’s nothing I can do about it,” Optimus quickly stops thinking.  “My fate is sealed and so is hers. Our paths shall never meet again.”
Knowing Optimus for such a long time, Ratchet knows when he is lying. Even he should be aware of how full of scrap that lie is. Still, he wishes to push it further and see for how long Optimus will keep it up.
“If you truthly think that way then delete all of those frames and we shall never speak of her again.”
Their optics met for a few seconds and the gentle look in Optimus’ optics let Ratchet know everything he needed. However, he wanted his friend to be the one to realize it. Some things have to be lived and pain is the best teacher. 
“I … I-”
Looking back at the screen, there are no pictures of you. The thought of never seeing you again crosses his mind. He doesn’t have much to remember you by. You had taken all of your things. No longer can he phantom words to deny the truth. 
“Why are you putting yourself through all of this pain, old friend? When you and I are aware that you cannot pass a second without thinking of her?”
It was late night at the hangar and all other Autobots had gone to recharge. It was only the two of them and no one dared to ask Optimus about past occurrences that included you. 
“I told her … I wish I had never met her.”
Ratchet slowly opens his intake the moment the words slips Optimus’ glossa. 
“Even if my spark wishes nothing more but to see her again … I am afraid I have severed the relationship beyond repay.”
There is a pause in which Ratchet wanted to comfort his friend, to say some words of encouragement but he doesn’t know if it will be good enough.
“If only you had seen her face, Ratchet  … You would know. I have no right to ask for forgiveness.” 
You are the strongest person he knows. He has yet to see you shed a tear, no amount of injuries have made you do so. But that night, between discussions and arguments, he saw your eyes become crystal. The only thing he could do was to look away. He knew he would break as well if he ever became the reason for your suffering. 
.
.
.
Seven months passed. 
Not a single word from you. 
Sometimes, however, Optimus would hear Fowler speak about you. A simple ‘She’s doing fine’ and ‘She has made new friends.’
But that was enough to make him wonder about you. Your new life, friends, if you had found anyone who was of your interest.
“We need the Autobot assistance in transporting a highly classified product across the state.”
He finds himself enjoying putting his life in danger. To take on difficult missions so his mind can be occupied. For those moments he is free from the thoughts of you. Any other second he is busy indulging in his torment from your parting. 
Apparently, MECH was extremely interested in this product and had plans to steal it from the CIA. It was the Autobots’ job to prevent that from happening. 
The bots surrounded a black bulletproof truck. They weren’t allowed to look at what was inside which did not please them. If they were to protect something, they wanted to know what it was. However, Optimus gave it a one time pass. After all, Fowler has proved himself to be a trusted ally. 
The first couple of miles went by easily. With no interruptions. 
It wasn’t until it started to go dark that trouble appeared. 
MECH had interjected the mission. Using every single gun, missile and bombs at their dispossession. Whatever that black truck was carrying, they wanted it no matter what. 
“At this rate we are going to lose the target!”
Arcee screamed through her comm-link as she tried her best to take down as many helicopters as possible without hurting any human in the process. Pretty much against her will but orders were orders. 
“These guys are really fighting it out!” Bulkhead was against a few tanks, he had stayed behind to keep them busy while the truck made an attempt to go out of sight. “Are we even sure this thing we are protecting is worth our lives?!”
Optimus was the one closest to the truck, keeping direct contact in case of a disaster. 
“Optimus! We won’t be able to keep them away for long!”
Bumblebee chirped in morse code and the Autobot leader knew he had to do something. 
He drives faster, facing the two officers that were driving the truck. Side to side, they look at the driverless vehicle. 
“Open the trunk and I’ll take the cargo. We won’t be able to hold them for long. I’ll take the cargo somewhere safe while you serve as a distraction. If we don’t do this, you’ll lose it all.”
The military officers look at each other for a small second. Giving a knowing look, they knew what they had to do. They open up the trunk and Optimus slows his driving, taking a look, finally, at what’s inside. 
The cargo is you. 
He quickly transforms back to his robot mode. Running towards you. He extended a sevo, he wanted you to jump. 
You were holding onto the walls of the truck as if your life depended on it. And it did. This was definitely not the encounter you were expecting after not seeing him for seven months. But now it wasn’t the moment to think about that. What happened between the two of you was over. But you still trusted Optimus Prime, the leader he has always been. 
“Quickly!”
You run towards him and jump as the trunk is in fast motion. Your feet land on his servo and in less than a second, he transforms back to his vehicle mode. Now you sat safely in the passenger seat. Optimus moves out of the road and drives off into the forest. Getting lost into the massiveness of nature and tall pine trees. 
No longer being able to hear chaos, Optimus assumed it was safe to talk. 
“Would you care to explain your status and the reasoning to why you are being transported by the American military?”
You weren’t fond of his voice, much less how this conversation started.
“Not even a ‘how are you’ first? You really haven’t changed at all, Prime.”
You say as you cross your arms in front of your chest. Looking outside the window, you wished you were being chased again by MECH. 
“Do not dare to call me by titles.”
There were times you called him by his last name. When you were angry and when the two of you were yet to form a relationship. He doesn’t like to reminisce about those times. 
“Just let me out. I’ll walk.”
“But–”
“I said … I’ll walk.”
Optimus stops and opens the door for you. You hop out of his vehicle mode and start walking without anywhere in mind. 
You put your hands in your oversize hoodie. The last thing you wanted was for him to take a deep look at you. Much less if he starts analyzing your body with stats. 
“I don’t think you know where you are supposed to be located,” he says as he transforms back to his regular robot mode. 
“I’ll figure it out.”
Optimus begins to panic as you start to walk away. This wasn’t how the reunion was supposed to be. He had dreamt of the next time he saw you. Maybe on a field of flowers and running towards each other. Ending it with an embrace and a passionate kiss. 
“Would you listen to reason for once?”
He tries again to engage but he only makes himself sound rude without having those intentions. 
“No.”
Would please look at him? It’s been seven months since he last saw you. He’s only seen your eyes through the pictures of his data-pad but they didn’t compare to seeing them in person–
“Why are you following me? I thought you didn’t care.”
You finally turn to look at him. 
He can’t control his processor at your sight. Your hair was a nice mess, you were wearing clothes too big for you, maybe to hide the few pounds you gained during this time. Your cheeks were pinker and plumber. Dark circles under your eyes but skin glowing and those beautiful eyes that could put any star in the universe to shame.
Optimus stumbles on his pedes and almost falls on his knees, your beauty too distracting for any living being to be witness of. 
“I .. I –”
He can’t believe you are talking to him. This was too soon and no words could leave his voice box as if had forgotten how to speak entirely. 
He wanted to say it all. How much he missed you, how desperately he needed you. How there hasn’t been a single day he didn’t think about you. How everything reminded him of you. And how painful has it been every second you are not with him.
But before he could rant about his undying love for you, he sees a painful expression on your face. Followed by you, placing your arms around your belly and bending as if the cause of your physical pain was located in your stomach.
“Are you alright? Are you hurt?”
“Just,” you take a moment to breathe as you slowly make your way towards a tree. “Just leave me alone.”
With sad and curious optics, he sees you put a hand on your stomach. Whispering comforting words. ‘It’s alright’ and ‘It’s ok’ you kept talking to yourself to make you believe those words. 
“We’ll be safe.”
“I am going to run a quick analysis–”
“No,” you interrupt him again. “You know I hate it when you do that.”
Optimus dislikes going against your wishes. But the way you are breathing heavily, your sweating and trembling doesn’t look like a good sign. He can manage to live without you if it guarantees that you can live a long happy life. But not the same can be said if your life is cut short for whatever reason. 
“My apologies but my mission is to keep you safe and that’s exactly what I tend to do.”
“I am pregnant,” you had no other choice. “Thankfully, you are not the father.”
That was a lie but at least the shock will prevent and confuse him enough. If Optimus were to do an analysis on your body, he would find anomalies only a Cybertronian would know. 
Finally getting the strength you need, you stand up and walk past Optimus whose face you did not dare to look. Your swollen belly still hurts but you didn’t want to worry him. The reason why you are not with him in the first place is because he thought of you as a liability. You no longer want to be seen as such. 
“Who’s the father of the child?”
The question infuriated you. Of all the things he could have asked, he asks such a selfish question. He shouldn’t care and certainly you are tired of Optimus pretending he does. 
“You know, on Earth, is customary to say ‘congratulations,” you turn to look at him. 
A fatal mistake. 
His optics reflected a grief unknown to you. The type you do not know nor wish to ever experience. Then there is a pain you recognize, that of a broken heart. You knew that feeling very well. He had been the one responsible for it after all. A part of you is happy to know that he is experiencing karma, that he is hopefully experiencing a fraction of the pain he made you go through.
But that wasn’t you. You didn’t want to inflect any type of suffering in him. Not now. Not ever.
“I am sorry.”
There wasn’t anything else you could say. You look down, disappointed at your own feelings.
“No. My apologies,” Optimus noticed your sudden change and he too feels unworthy to be of your presence. Having his ill feelings and jealousy overtake his processor instead of worrying about your well being. “I did not think it was possible for you to find a suitable partner with whom … to mate with … and so soon.”
“Well, humans do not live for long and we only have a few years until we are no longer able to ‘mate��”
You didn’t like using the word ‘mate’ . It made humans sound like animals but you used it so Optimus could be spoken to in terms he could understand. 
“But do you have … feelings for this individual?”
“Yes,” you lied again, trying to see what you can get away with.  “He is just and kind. Tall and handsome.” 
Optimus puts a servo on his hip and looks to the other side. Not looking at anything in particular rather he didn’t want to show his evident discomfort. 
“Yet it seems he is unable to do the most important duty … to protect you.”
“He is quite adequate, actually,” you tease him again. The Autobot leader might be a smart war tactician but is terrible at understanding hints.  “He is the strongest and fierce when needed.”
“Well, I’ll have you know that I have as well found someone else to keep my time occupied,” he stutters, unable to lie. “She’s strong, a good talker and a listener. Kind and has the most beautiful eyes in the entire universe.”
Now he was being too specific for your liking. What if he was telling the truth and he had indeed found someone else? You didn't know how not. After all, Optimus Prime was the most extraordinary being on Earth and probably in the entire universe. 
All of your doubts and insecurities began to fill your heart. You were just a human, easily replaceable. But Optimus? There’s only one of him. You were insignificant compared to him. It has always been this way. 
“Then I hope she is better than I ever was.”
You turn to keep walking into the woods with no destination whatsoever but you didn’t care. 
 “It seems we made the right choice to part ways.”
Optimus wouldn’t have it. He can’t phantom it and it’s probably selfish thinking. But he can’t understand how easily you can say that while there hasn’t been a single day he is not tormented by your absence. When every second of his life has been torture without you. 
“Is that really how you feel?” His voice is indignant. Every circuit in his processor, begged him to hold you. To tell you how much he craves you and how unfair has life been. Taking you away only when you have become the most beautiful of beings.  “After everything?”
“You have someone and I have someone,” you don’t turn around, putting a hand again on your stomach. Giving it a small rub and looking down at it.  “And I am with a child as you can see and very happy.”
“A child that should have been born from our bond. I should have been the father of that sparkling, I-”  
“You wished we had never met,” you whisper quietly but you know he can hear you. He always listened. “So please, stop talking like you care.”
“(Y/N)?” 
He looks at you and notices your distraught. Your breathing has become slower.
“Are you alright?”
You fall but before your body could touch the ground, Optimus catches you on his servo. He studies you for a second. You have pink cheeks and breathing seems difficult. He doesn’t hesitate to use his comm-link.
“Ratchet, I request an immediate groundbridge.” 
.
.
.
“Vitals are stable but I’ll stay alert tonight to watch over her.”
Ratchet was glad to have you back at the base although he wished it was in different circumstances. After a couple of hours, everyone went back to their private quarters. The only ones left were the medic and the leader of the autobots. 
They watched over you as you slept soundly in the medical berth. Your vital signs displayed on the data-screen. Although everything seems fine, the two of them were known to overthink and worry.
“I waited for everyone to leave to tell you something of an extremely important matter.”
“What is it, old friend?”
“While doing some analyses in (Y/N)’s body, I distinguished an anomaly,” Ratchet clicks on keys and rapidly two sound frames appear. There are many lines, short and big, all close together. Together they create a different pattern from each other. 
 “(Y/N) appears to have two different heart beats. But, of course, that goes against human biology. So I did further testing.”
“I made a discovery. The second beat has a different frequency of that of a human heart,” the medic played the sound, Optimus recognized this as your heartbeat.  “But this other one has the same frequency and energy as a spark.”
“I do not understand.”
Trying to be tactful was hard for Ratchet as it is. He didn’t want to downplay the situation either. It was a serious matter but he has to admit that not even himself can’t contain his exhilaration. 
“Cybertron hasn’t had a single sparkling in centuries so coming to this conclusion took some time” 
The medic ex-vents, somehow it helped with his tension. He has been alive for quite some time and yet he can’t remember the last time he helped bring a new life to Cybertron. It was all the culmination of his studies and practices. Maybe finally he will have a chance to create life instead of just curing it. 
“After all, I had to look through some old archives and Human-Cybertronian hybrids is a first. But seeing that humans have the ability to create life and combining that with Cybertronian transmission genes … I believe I have a definite conclusion.” 
Ratchet presses a key, making the data-screen play a distinct sound. A sound similar to static but a distinct rhythm could be heard. Gentle and soft. Pure. 
“(Y/N) is carrying a sparkling.” 
“By the AllSpark,” Optimus blinks multiple times as he always does when he is excited or perplexed about something. He looks at you. Your small fragile body. “How?”
“How are humans able to create life with a soul, conscious mind and a body?” Ratchet doesn’t know how to explain it, because even he can't fully understand how. “Primus may have heard our prayers and has blessed us with an opportunity to welcome a new life to our race.”
“Agent Fowler must have known this and MECH as well. That’s why they were so precautious when transporting her from one place to the other.”
Optimus made a mental note to ask Fowler about this and his reasoning as to why he wasn’t informed of such an important matter.
“If MECH lay hands on (Y/N) they would experiment on her and the sparkling as soon as it’s  born,” Ratchet says as he walks towards you with a tender expression in his faceplace. “Half Human, half Cybertronian. This child will change everything.”
“Conceived from a son of Primus and a daughter of Unicron.”
The situation was out of legends and myths. The kind of thing that sounds impossible but maybe this little hope inside of you is what is needed to light up their darkest hour. 
“And this may also explain your sudden urge to nest,” the medic’s voice is more light-hearted now. Having flashbacks of Optimus picking up random flowers, pretty rocks and good-looking metal to bring back to the base. When questioned about it, the leader of the Autobots simply responded that he had an urge to do so. 
 “I thought you were going crazy when you started to bring earthly materials to the base.”
“I thought so too.”
Optimus sees you sleep. He has the need to touch your swollen belly, to feel the growing spark within you. You have always been amazing, he knew that much. But he never thought you were capable of conceiving life like their own. What a beautiful sight. One he never thought possible. Now, it’s right in front of him. Hope. The complete personification of it, staring right at him. 
“Will she be alright?”
“She’s stable but she definitely needs to be watched over. Her weakened state is due to the fact that the sparkling is taking too much of her energy,” Ratchet also has his optics on you. The happiest Optimus has ever seen. Knowing that there is hope for their race to continue to grow must be the first real sign of hope Ratchet has had since eons ago.
 “Energon is mostly toxic to humans but the sparkling has created anti-mechs for (y/n)’s immune system to withstand it.  We are going to have to start supplying her with energon if we wish for the sparkling to be born healthy.”
“And most importantly,” he takes a moment to look at his old friend. His optics now showed a more hostile gaze. “A sparkling needs the electromagnetic waves of a caregiver to copy growing behaviors.”
“She needs you, Optimus.”
.
.
.
It was the middle of the night when you woke up. You feel thirsty but need more than water. Your body has had strange cravings lately but you were not about to randomly drink energon just because the baby wanted to. 
You knew this place too well. The smell of metal and bots was everywhere. The soft vans of the air conditioner are comforting. The orange light coming from Ratchet’s data screen illuminated the room enough for you not to be scared. Although you didn’t want to admit it, you missed this place. Even when you much preferred to be sleeping in the coach instead of the medical berth. 
“Do you need something?”
Optimus came back from behind you. You shake your body and back away a few centimeters. 
“My apologies, I did not want to scare you.”
He had mass-displaced. Still over 10 feet and really tall compared to any regular human. He tries to be delicate even when you know he is not fond of this form. Optimus had told you before that it was a bit uncomfortable for him. Of course, he never seemed to complain whenever he mass shifted to lay on your bed.
You look down and caress your stomach. It would be stupid to believe that Ratchet did not find out about your little secret and told Optimus about it. 
“It’s alright.”
Awkwardly, he sits next to you. You thought he might be furious with you. For lying to him in the first place. But now you feel ashamed for a reason you can’t understand. The mere fact of deceiving Optimus Prime is an unpleasant experience. 
“(Y/N) …”
“I am sorry I didn’t tell you,” you don’t look at him. Instead, you look down at your feet and how they hang from the medical berth.  “Don’t get angry at Fowler, please. I was the one who told him not to tell you.”
“Why didn’t you want to share such important information?”
“Because you said … You wished you had never met me,” you feel a knot forming on your throat. It hurts to speak, to even form thoughts and remember what happened seven months ago. His voice is still very present in your memories. The pain is still in your heart.  “So I thought, you wouldn’t want our child either.”
Clenching his servo into a fist, Optimus fights the urge to hold you. You were so close, yet the only thing he can indulge himself with is your scent. It's different now. It was your smell combined with a new aroma. That of his sparkling. 
“I have made many hard decisions in my life,” it was difficult for him to look at you. Now, he feels indignant to stand before you. You were to him what the gods were to their subjects. Devotion is not enough for him to satisfy his service to you. 
 “But the hardest decision was to let you go and I did it because I was scared. Even now, I doubt myself. Maybe you’ll be safer somewhere else. Away from me, away from all of this,”
Reminiscing about the past is painful to him. Most memories of you are lovely, unforgettable. But that time seven months ago when the Decepticons had captured you. The screams, the terror in your face, Megatron ordering you to tell him how scared you were. How he couldn’t do anything. Helpless. Pathetic. 
And for a small second. For a fraction he really believed he had lost you. That was enough for him to know he won’t function without you. 
 “If something were to happen to you … I won’t be able to … I can’t-”
He feels his entire core shake. His servos trembling as they remember holding your almost lifeless body.
“I am sorry,” his voice glitches. “I said unforgivable things with hopes that they would push you away. To protect you. I can live with you hating me but I cannot envision the day the universe takes your soul from me.” 
May Primus have mercy on his spark. May he forgive him but Optimus would throw everything away just to hold you. Just for his words to reach your heart. To feel your touch once again. 
“But I was a fool to believe I could stay away from you. To think that my restraint was as strong as my morals.” 
There is silence and although he doesn’t dare to look at you, he can feel your presence. For now it was enough to have you next to him. 
  “You may not believe in my words but believe this; the only good thing this fool has ever done is love you. It's the only thing … the only decision I have no doubts about.”
Suddenly, softness meets his faceplate. Immediately, his optics were on the blink of releasing energon. With a simple touch, you had healed him. A part of his spark that felt empty was full again. The meaning to his life was restored. 
“Do you even know how much I missed you?” 
You ask him with a gentle voice. Caressing every sense of his audials, engraving them in his processor. To forever remain in the deepest part of his mind. 
He can’t even begin to tell you what he truly feels. He had given up. Come to realize that no words, no language in the present, past nor future could ever be vast enough to express the love he has for you. 
Optimus could try with his actions. That may not be enough either. But he will have all of eternity to make for it. 
“Everyday after you left, I would go to the rooftop on the base and I would count each star in the sky,” he puts a servo on top of your hand and his dermas brush against your skin, a small kiss. “To try and relieve the nights I would count the stars in your eyes.”
You didn’t say anything. Whenever it came to talking, Optimus was always more proficient. You never felt the need to say something either, he always knew what you meant. What you were feeling. Words were not necessary. Not when he can read your eyes so easily. 
“And not even the timeless company of the entire universe could compare to one second with you.”
That night, you rested in his chassis. Missing your warmth, he embraced you. Your stomach pressed lightly against him. This experience was something new to him and he was terrified of it. Afraid he won’t be good enough to be a partner or a father. But as long as you were with him, the impossible became possible. So maybe becoming someone worthy of a sparkling could also be feasible. 
Optimus will try his very best. For you, for the sparkling. For himself. Failing it's not an option and being a father was a greater honor than being a Prime. A title he would give up if only you would ask him. Of course, you will never ask him such a thing. He knew you better than that. 
Optimus believes in Primus, fully. But he is thankful to whatever gods created you. If he could and knew how, he would pray and thank them. 
He now has another chance. Another opportunity. To give you what he has been collecting. 
Maybe tomorrow he will give you all the dandelions he found for you. 
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A/N: Sorry for the late Christmas post. Merry Christmas and Happy New Years I hope y’all enjoyed this. As always, for any questions, comments, concerns or prompt ideas you can send me an inbox. For all the love and support … Thank you! See you next year!
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delzinrowe · 5 months ago
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Got amy headcanons about being in a secret relationship with jjk? I feel like they'd all have separate reasons for keeping everything down low
For the sake of my sanity i'm not doing all of jjk like in my hc posts I hope you're not mad at me for that
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A/N: I only choose a few ones, if you want someone specific I haven't picked just send me another ask and I'll do my best. But these are the characters I feel the most and feel I can portray well. Includes: Yuji, Megumi, Takuma ☆ Choso, Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Yaga
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Yuji just kind of accidentally kept it a secret. With Nobara around she talks a lot, and Yuji listens, he doesn't interrupt his friends. He was going to tell them about you two eventually, but whenever he wanted to tell them something came up, mostly missions. And after a while it slipped his mind that he hasn't told anyone. He's a kind and good guy, but he's not pushy when it comes to his own daily life. When he has good news he likes to share it with friends, but after a while of trying and failing he forgot about it.
Megumi is and has always been a more private and reserved person. He takes a while to warm up with others. So, once it got serious with you two he asked if you're okay with keeping it more private. Or rather, he implied it, you already knew it was gonna be more private. He doesn't like his private business being the talk of the town. After a while he would confide into Yuji, with the promise of him not telling anyone. Nobara? Hell no, out of the question. Megumi's main goal is to keep Gojo in the dark because the poor boy would never hear the end of it if Gojo ever found out he has a partner.
Takuma would only tell it to Nanami. He might have the feeling of shouting it from the rooftops that the person he likes also likes him back. But he would much rather just confide in his mentor. Which he does. And thanks to Nanami's private nature he doesn't tell anyone else, but he is proud and happy for Takuma. That's enough for our local skaterboy. Hearing that his mentor is happy that he's happy is all he needs, therefore no one else really needs to know about it. After a while he would lose that mindset and it would be replaced with "fuck it, I wanna show you off" which is what he does. He'd have his arm around you and walk around the entire school grounds and all over Tokyo just yelling "That's my partner!" "Watch out, happy boyfriend coming through." He's the epitome of golden retriever energy.
Choso doesn't really know the etiquette of dating, his worst fear is to do something wrong and lose you. He isn't sure if being in a relationship is something you keep private or parade around. He does see couples on the street and on tv, but it's still new to him. He's only had a human body for a few short months. The thought to introduce you to his sorcerer friends doesn't even really occur to him until you ask, which prompts a conversation between you where he asks you all sorts of questions on this matter. He eventually settles for only telling his brother Yuji as he's concered for your safety. He is a curse who murdered people after all.
Gojo keeps your relationship a secret from the very first moment, even if you wouldn't have expected it from him. Being known as the strongest came with a big target on his back, he's had bounties on his head since he was a toddler. Even if he can easily take care of any threat, he would do anything to keep you safe and out of danger. The less people know about his sole weakness the better. He does apologise and spoil you to make up for it, but he cannot and will not risk putting you in harms way. If you're involved his judgement isn't as clear as it should be.
Geto could potentially have two reasons, depending on if he stayed with jujutsu high or defected. If he stayed the most prominent reason to keep your relationship a secret would be Gojo. His best friend has his nose in everything, but it's also partly since he's known as one of the strongest and you prove a weakness, in that sense he's similar to Gojo. Now... if he defected, then it's solely to keep up appearances as cult leader. Since he's not stupid he knows that a lot of people only join his cult because of his looks, and he fears that once it's known he's in a steady relationship that his cult would lose a lot of members.
Nanami is not a secretive person, but he is a more private one. He doesn't like sharing his business everywhere. What's going on in his private life will remain private. He does not like to mix personal with work, therefore he would keep your relationship quiet because it simply has no place in his work life. Especially since coming home to you is his happy place that brings him peace, he wouldn't taint that by mixing personal and work.
Yaga is an authority figure. As principal he holds a certain status, while he doesn't care much for the authority he holds, he does need to be respected. It's therefor a mix between Gojo and Nanami, where he doesn't want to mix personal too much with work, but also doesn't wanna put a target on your back. Considering he is also the only one who knows how to make cursed dolls he is already the target of some people. Dragging you into all of this would only be harmful. The only one who really knows about you two is Panda, obviously.
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c0la-queen · 11 months ago
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RAGHHHHHHHHH
Could you ever so kind and provide some general dating Headcannons for all the four boys?? 🥺👉👈
Maybe some extra with red leader or someone else if you’re fine with that??? 🥺💜
Mwah mwah you have amazing work <3 /p
Oh my gods I am SO sorry that this is so late!! For some reason, Mr. Tumblr decided not to notify me about your ask?? And then I was at my bestie's house this weekend, so I haven't checked my inbox until now. Begging for your forgiveness rn Anon!!
Also literally kissing you for asking for Red Leader!! Mwah, mwah!!
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Edd
If you are dating Edd... girlie I am so sorry for your sanity.
Don't get me wrong, I love Edd! He was my first Eddsworld love, my pookie bear for real! But he's the biggest bastard of the entire gang and I stand by that.
Calls you dumb pet names to try and make you laugh. Sugar Tits (regardless of gender or lack thereof, might I add), Baby Doll, Sexy.
He WILL grab/slap your ass all the time. Even in public. Only grins when you glare at him.
This man is a horrible influence. It will be so hard to get your shit done if he has decided that you need to be spending time with him. Why worry about work or chores when you could be all cuddled up with him and Ringo on the couch?
Will sulk if you reject his attempts.
If he's trying to get shit done and you're pestering him for attention? He will drop his basket of laundry or the dishes in his hands in a millisecond.
If he's working on a commission or animation, he'll let you sit in his lap in his chair, let you sit all pretty for him while he works. When he finishes, if you've fallen asleep by then -which you usually do - then he'll carefully move you both to his bed and snuggle up to you and take a nap with you.
Speaking of cuddling, he does naturally run hot. Comes with being a big boy <3 But if you don't enjoy that, then he'll use his powers to cool down his skin for you. Anything to keep cuddling!
He also uses his powers whenever possible. Will abuse them without shame. He puts things on the highest shelf, just so you have to him for help. He'll put patches of ice on the floor under your feet, just so he can catch you before you fall (he'll never let you actually get hurt), and uses his super strength to scoop you up randomly and carry you around.
You cannot show your text messages to ANYONE. He will say filthy things, just to fluster you. Horny Bastard. Finds ways to turn even the most mundane conversations into teasing.
He'd do cute couple things with you, like painting together and swapping canvases every 5 minutes. His favorite is going to cat cafes. The cats literally love him, its like he's made of catnip with how they swarm him.
Physical affection is a huge thing with him. Even little touches throughout the day, like ruffling your hair as he passes by, or a big hug from behind while you fix food.
Overall, big teddy bear that just likes to see his darling blush.
Tom
As I've stated in previous works, Tom is a secret romantic.
He's not a traditional romantic like Matt, but he's romantic in his own way.
Likes parallel play a lot. Finds it relaxing to just sit in his room, testing new songs on his bass while you lay on his bed reading a book. Or in your room, lounging on one of your plush beanbag and organizing his Spotify playlists while you fold your laundry.
Dates with him consist of record stores, concerts, and late night walks.
He'll sing for you if you ask him to.
Very down to earth, both as a person and as a boyfriend. If you have problems, he'll listen patiently until you're done, then help you brainstorm solutions. He doesn't downplay or ignore your feelings, but he doesn't jump to emotions like others might.
He tends to sleep in late on his nights off, since he's more of a night owl than anything. You know that, so you've made it a little tradition to fix him coffee around 11. You know exactly how he takes it, and he always thanks you with a kiss on the cheek and a sleepy, mumbled "you're the best."
Very caring. He'll make sure you've eaten and had water. Will usher you to bed if he can see that you're tired, or do your chores for you if you can't do them for whatever reason. If you can't sleep, he'll make you a mug of chamomile tea and sing you a little lullaby.
When it comes to his monster tendencies, he tries to keep you away from it all. He's bitter about what he is, and he thinks that you're better off separated from that side of him.
At the start of relationship, he'd get angry if you tried to push it. He'd snap at you, distance himself, not talk to you for maybe a couple of days. Further on in the relationship, though, if you push the issue and reassure him that you love every side of him, even the monstrous one, then he'd be more willing. Willing to let you in, to let you see that part of him. He'd be nervous about it, but he'd do it because he loves you.
Matt
He is a traditional romantic! His Mama raised him right, and he drinks his Respect Juice.
Makes sure you two have date night at least once every week. Dressing up nice, going out to dinner or a play, taking a walk through the town to wind down the night. Heading back into the house, changing back into comfortable clothes. He'd wipe your makeup off for you, if you wear it.
Absolutely the kind of guy to get down on his knees in front of you and unbuckle/untie your shoes or high heels for you. He's just so devotional.
If, for whatever reason, you guys are unable to have your date night, he'll make it up to you in some way. A bouquet of your favorite flowers sitting on your bed with a little note. A passionate kiss before one of you has to leave the house. A heartfelt love letter sealed with wax.
Makes sure to text you throughout the day with sweet messages. Compliments, "I love you"s, selfies, updates on what is happening at work. Or just reminders that he's thinking of you. Misses you.
Likes to cook meals for you if its just the two of you at home. Breakfast is his forte, but he's not the worst at following a recipe.
Always amazing for advice. He'll let you talk to him while he hugs you from behind. If it's something sad, he might cry. Just the idea of you going through something negative makes him sad, too.
If he doesn't have advice for you, he'd do anything in his power to find someone who does. One of the other roommates, or even his mother, if you're comfortable with it.
Speaking of his mother, she absolutely adores you. Since Matt has such a good relationship with her, he's already told her so much about you. She thinks its wonderful that her baby has fallen in love. After a while, Matt will even bring you along to his lunches with his mother. You two hit it off instantly.
If you're okay with it, then Matt would love to show you off on his social media. He thinks you're so gorgeous, the entire world should know that he managed to land you. Its never anything invasive, and he always gets your permission before he posts things. Blocks any weird or gross comments.
Loves going on shopping dates with you. Most of the time, its at the mall or a mall in a different town, because he loves walking around and window shopping. Occasionally, he'll take you to more expensive stores. It doesn't bother him, he loves spoiling you. No matter where you two are, he'll buy you anything that you want. If you are adamant to spend your own money, he won't put up too much of a fuss, though he does prefer to pay for you.
He'll do that couples trend with you where you find nail polish that matches the other's eye color.
Gift giving is just one of his love languages in general. It makes him so happy to give his loved one things that he bought. For you specifically, he'll also throw in hand made gifts. He may not be the most talented artistically, but he'll stay awake late into the night, sitting on the floor with a YouTube tutorial playing, paper and cardboard scattered around, a pencil between his teeth, paint on his hands and smeared on his cheek. The end result may look a little crude, but he'll still present it to you with pride. And, of course, you always love it.
Tord
Tord is probably the most romantically stunted of the four. Its not that he doesn't love you, far from it really. He just grew up in an environment where love wasn't freely given, and was often limited for appearances.
His father, as the Red Leader, insisted that he keep a professional and feared image. So, Tord never saw him being affectionate with his mother.
It might be hard at first. You'll struggle. You two may fight. But you'll always make up in the end. He'll listen to you, try to understand your point of view.
He's not against physical affection, but he's able to live without it. Will indulge you whenever you ask. If he's busy, which he usually is, he'll let you drape yourself over him from behind while he sits in his chair, letting you rest your cheek on the top of his head and watch him work.
More than anything, his love language is words of affirmation. Despite being a man of few words, he'll always give you praise. He'll make sure you know that you are his, he is yours, and he loves you. Nothing will change that.
Scary dog privilege. He'll always walk just behind you in public, keeping a guiding hand on the small of your back. Stays alert of you surroundings and the people around, so that you don't have to. You don't even have to worry about people approaching you in public. One piercing glare from Tord is enough to deter anyone.
Not the best at giving advice to problems. He'll listen, but sometimes he can't quite understand why something is an issue. Doesn't invalidate your feelings on purpose, it just happens inadvertently at times. Always, ALWAYS apologizes and holds you close when he realizes what he did.
His preferred dates are nights in at home. Cuddled up on the couch with takeout watching shitty rom-coms. Cooking food that he ate growing up in Norway while you sit at the kitchen table watching. Going to the convenience store at midnight to get Ben and Jerry's in the middle of anime binges.
You become his crutch. When he's having bad paranoia on nights that are too quiet, he'll seek you out. Just having you lay in bed with him, warm and solid and breathing, always calms him down.
He will never let you meet his parents. You are one of the very few good things in his life, and he wants to keep that away from his fucked up home life. Might let you meet his little sister, but not for a long time.
Surprisingly, he does tend to talk more when its just the two of you. He allows you into his head, verbalizing his thoughts to you. He'll ramble about his projects, tell you about the history behind his culture, or rant about things that annoy him. Denies it vehemently in front of others.
He is a huge tease, second only to Edd. What's dangerous is how casual he is about it. Loves making you squirm, and he'll never even change his expression. Sometimes he won't even be looking at you, but rest assured that he is swimming in satisfaction over how flustered you are.
Red Leader
I have so many thoughts about him. Oh my lord.
This is going off the scenario where Reader is a Red Army soldier and met him through the army, after the events of The End.
I want to clarify that this is NOT following the events of TBATF!!! This is my own Red Army timeline, what I refer to in my Eddsworld bubble as "The Bad End"
There are two ways that you'd be able to catch Red Leader's attention. Either you are an extremely talented soldier that does well among your peers, enough to earn the praise of your superior officers and eventually Red Leader himself. Or, you were assigned as his personal assistant to help with paperwork and meetings, but you were so good at handling his temper and attitude that he found himself surprised.
The latter of the two is my favorite, so I'll be working under that one.
Before you, Red Leader had been through several assistants. None of them lasted more than a month. By nature, he was a moody, temperamental man. The stress of the army and oncoming war only made that worse. He saw those previous assistants as nuisances, only getting in his way. He would yell at them, berate them, drive them to the brink until they beg Paul and Pat to transfer them.
When they assigned you to him, they expected the same thing to happen. The two even made bets on how long you'd last. On your first day, Red Leader was nasty to you. Gruff and rude. But... you bit back. That took him by surprise. Instead of taking the insult and shuffling out like a puppy with its tail between its legs, you pursed your lips and gave him a stern look and talked to him in a way that nobody dared to. He should've been angry. Should have screamed at you, discharged you from the army in a heartbeat.
Instead, he found that he quite enjoyed it. He enjoyed your spitfire. Not that he'd let you know. He only gave you a noncommittal hum and dismissed you with a wave of his hand. But... he kept you around. Even found excuses for you to come into his office more than necessary. His penchant for teasing came back full force. He'd poke and prod, finding ways to make you react with that fire he so loved.
It takes a long time for him to finally make a move. Probably takes a near-death experience for him, or an injury to you for him to realize that he wants this. He wants a future with you.
At first, he may seem a little cold in public. Not to the degree that his father was - he promised himself that he would never be like his father. Simply a more... professional air about the entire thing. It was more out of anxiety than anything. He didn't want to make you a target, didn't want to cause you to get hurt. As his army grows more powerful and takes over more and more countries, he grows more comfortable with PDA. He knows that when he is the most powerful man in the world, he doesn't have to worry about anyone hurting you.
He would probably treat you more like a spouse than a girlfriend/boyfriend right off the bat. He's older now, thinking more about the future than the present. He already knows that he wants to be with you forever, so why go through the formalities and hassle of dating?
Always makes time for you whenever he can. If he's in a meeting with his generals or another world leader, he'll sneak text messages to you. Doesn't give a shit if he's caught. What are they going to do to him, Red Leader?
If he's cooped up in his office all day, his door is always open to you. Loves having you drop by unannounced to bring him food or coffee. He'll let you climb into his lap while he works, or sit behind him in his chair and cling to him. Even if you're just sitting in a separate chair nearby, working on your own stuff. He's happy.
If you want to continue being a soldier, or his assistant, he'll let you. But he's also perfectly happy to have you simply be his partner and not have a care in the world. You could sit all pretty in his quarters waiting for him to get off duty, or use the time to pursue your own hobbies and interests. As long as you're happy and cared for, it's okay with him.
Spoils you rotten. You're Red Leader's, so of course you only deserve the best things. Anything in the world you want, you only have to ask for it. It's yours. He would raze entire cities just to see you smile.
He does enjoy taking you out on dates. While also spending time with you, he sees it as a way to show you off to the world. Dressing you up in the finest clothes that he got you, the prettiest jewelry that he bought. Taking you to restaurants and operas where everyone can see you hanging on his arm. It makes him puff up with pride.
When the two of you are alone, he's so adoring. Loves snuggling. It's a struggle to convince him to let you out of bed in the mornings, he'll just be clinging to you. If you do somehow manage to escape his grasp, he'll catch you around the waist and drag you back to bed. Won't stop until Paul or Pat message him to get his ass out of bed. He always grumbles about how "it's my damn army, I should get to sleep in as long as I want".
Sometimes, at night, he has pains in his right shoulder, the side where he's burned and amputated. It can range from a dull ache to excruciating pain. On nights that it hurts too much to move, you'll scramble out of bed and get his medication from his nightstand, gently coaxing him to take it. You'll hold him and comfort him until the pain subsides and he falls back asleep.
He doesn't like to talk about it, really. It feels weird, letting anyone see this part of his life. Letting you see his vulnerability. Letting you see him.
But he does.
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cursedwoman1859 · 1 year ago
Text
Arm Candy (Silco/F!Reader)
“I need someone who can look pretty on my arm and be trusted not to make off with the silverware from a topsider estate. That’s you.” Silco needs a plus-one for a fancy topsider party. You don't really have a choice but to agree.
AO3 Link
Rating: Explicit (18+, MDNI)
Words: 5.8k
Content: Resolved sexual tension; semi-public sex; vaginal fingering; dirty talk; dubious business ethics
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It wasn’t often you got called into Silco’s office first thing in the morning. You were a paper-pusher, not one of the battle-hardened henchmen who usually hung around the Last Drop, and your work mostly kept you at your desk. Calculations came as naturally to you as breathing, and you could crunch numbers faster even than Silco himself. In the few months you’d been working for the Eye of Zaun, you’d made yourself indispensable. You helped keep track of the Shimmer shipments going to and from Zaun, you effortlessly slipped the profits from the drugs business into the earnings from the various factories and bars and properties that Silco owned, and once a week you’d spend the evening alone in the office with your stern, exacting boss while you went over that week’s financial reports. Silco needed someone to cook his books, and you prided yourself on being the best damn chef in the undercity. You kept to yourself, you prayed he never noticed your furtive glances up at him when he was absorbed in his work, and you did not cause trouble.
So it was only natural that your stomach twisted itself into knots as you stepped into his office, and that those knots tightened when he looked up from the paper he was reading, his bicoloured stare pinning you and making your walk to stand in front of his desk feel like miles instead of metres.
“You wanted to see me, sir?” you said when you were near, and the way his eyes flicked over you, almost too quickly for you to notice, did nothing to calm you.
“I did,” he said, his chair creaking as he leaned back in it. You’d definitely never wondered if it could hold two people. “What are you doing tomorrow night?”
You could swear that sentence made your brain fritz like a faulty wire. “I, um—” Absolutely nothing was the real answer, but for some reason you didn’t want to admit that. “I made plans with…Ran and Dustin,” you said, saying the first names that came to your mind even though you’d never shared more than small talk with either of them.
Silco’s eyebrow raised as if he could see right through your lie. Which he probably could, because it was completely transparent. “Then cancel them. I need your help at an event.”
“What kind of…event?” you said, your mind reeling with all the things Silco could be alluding to. Shakedowns, back-alley deals, assassinations…
“Don’t look so frightened,” Silco said, taking a cigar from his ashtray and lighting it. He took a deep drag, letting the smoke billow around him as he spoke. “Are you familiar with Ko Shosu?”
It took you a moment to remember the name from some of the background research you’d carried out on Silco’s competitors. “Doesn’t he own that factory that makes gears or something?”
“The very same. He’s hosting a party at his residence topside tomorrow night and unfortunately, I’ll need to make an appearance. Shosu seems to think we’re acquaintances. And on top of that, I happen to know that one of his associates has run into some financial trouble as of late. His factory makes components that are essential to the Shimmer-tanks we’re developing. Now isn’t that a stroke of luck?”
“You want to get to this associate so you can get him to work with you?”
“Exactly. His name is Rupert Torek and he’s run up gambling debts with some very unsavoury people. I’m sure he’ll be cooperative once he realises I can lend him enough money to get himself out of debt before his wife finds out.”
You decided not to ask how Silco could have information like that on someone he’d never even met. For your sanity’s sake, it was better not to know. “And why do you need me, sir?”
It might have just been your imagination, but you could swear Silco looked you up and down again. Slower this time. “I thought that would be obvious. I cannot exactly show up to something like this alone. I need someone who can distract Torek’s wife so I can get five minutes alone with him, and who can look pretty on my arm and be trusted not to make off with the silverware from a topsider estate. That’s you.”
“I, um—” you floundered for a minute – the words look pretty on my arm setting your heart racing, which was stupid, he’d literally just said he wanted you to be his arm candy for a night, it meant nothing – and Silco raised an eyebrow at your hesitation.
“You’ll be paid overtime for your trouble, of course,” he said.
“That wasn’t—thank you, sir,” you said quickly.
“Good,” he said, flicking through some of the papers on his desk, his focus already slipping back to his work. “Meet me outside Ko Shosu’s house at eight sharp. Wear something nice and do not be late.”
It was a struggle to focus on your work for the next two days. The figures that usually came so easily to you seemed to blur together until you had to triple-check your spreadsheets in case you’d made an error while your mind insisted on screeching Silco think’s I’m pretty over and over like a stuck record. You were sure he’d meant nothing by that offhanded comment, but that didn’t help anything.
It was almost a relief when the next evening rolled around just so you could focus on doing something.
But that relief didn’t last long when you realised you didn’t have the first clue what you should wear to a party at a topsider’s fancy estate. There wasn’t time to hit up the markets even if you could justify the expense, so you settled for a black dress that was simple, but showed off your figure without showing too much of anything else, as you could at least guess that anything shorter than the knee-length hem of your dress might not go over well among the stiff, buttoned-up topsiders. You’d had the dress a long time and had to stitch it once or twice, but surely nobody would notice a little thing like that.
You felt strangely buoyant as you made your way through the upper districts of Zaun, where at this time in the evening business was just starting to pick up. Lines were forming outside the nicer clubs, the street hawkers were packing up to make way for the crowds, and the air nearly sparkled with Shimmer residue as you passed the open doors of some of the edgier establishments, where topsiders went to get a taste of the undercity without actually having to venture below. You couldn’t even find it within yourself to be annoyed at the arrogant topsiders who came to Zaun to indulge in all the things they couldn’t in Piltover before returning to their cushy homes and easy lives. Tonight felt like an infiltration, and it was you who would be inserting yourself somewhere you could never belong.
-
You met up with Silco outside the gates of Ko Shosu’s estate. He’d gone straight there from a meeting with some topsider businessman, and he was dressed as elegantly as he always was. As you approached you glanced at the people milling around on the wide driveway, and you suddenly felt underdressed.
“You’re almost late,” Silco said by way of greeting, and the nervous knot in your stomach only tightened.
“Sorry, sir. Border guards held me up. You know how they are.” The Enforcer at the checkpoint on the bridge had made a huge fuss over your ID photo having a slightly different hairstyle than you did now, just being an asshole because he was an Enforcer and he could.
“Hm,” was all he said as his eyes raked over you, and your mind instantly went to those little stitches in your dress. You suddenly felt as if he could see every little flaw in you, and the feeling only worsened when a couple of women in glittering floor-length gowns swept past, arm-in-arm and laughing airily.
“Do I look all right?” you said just to break the tense silence. “This is the best I have.”
“You look perfectly acceptable,” Silco said, and that was almost worse than if he hadn’t said anything. Acceptable. You’d be lucky if you weren’t mistaken for a servant. “Shall we?” he said then, offering you his arm. When you hesitated, he rolled his eyes. “Take my arm. We have to at least appear as if we both want to be here.”
“Do you want to be here?” you said as you curled your hand around his elbow, trying to ignore the jolt you felt at touching him, even if he was wearing a coat.
He scoffed. “Of course I don’t. But needs must.”
As you made your way up the long driveway, you couldn’t help but gawk at your surroundings. You knew this wasn’t even close to being the grandest house in all of Piltover, but at that moment you could have believed it. There were at least four floors, the upper two ringed in balconies spilling over with hanging flowers and vines. The next closest house had to be at least a hundred metres away, and in the dark space between you could make out the open expanse of a lawn lit by a ring of ground-level lamps, and manicured trees on each side. You couldn’t imagine what the topsiders would do with such a space – you could probably fit a whole other house in there, even one as large as Shosu’s.
And when you entered the house itself, you actually gasped. “Someone lives here? It looks like a palace.”
Silco shot you a glare as you stared at your surroundings with wide eyes, barely even registering the doorman who came to take your coats. “Remember how I said you were the only one I could trust not to fill your pockets? Don’t make me regret it.”
But you were hardly listening as your eyes roved over the crowded ballroom. It was a sea of fine suits and jewel-toned gowns, with servants darting through the throngs like the quick little fish that lived in the shallows of the river, trays of drinks and tiny pastry-like things balanced on their fingertips. Music drifted from somewhere you couldn’t see, almost drowned out by the chatter, and diamonds glittered at fingers and throats – and even on the ceiling, you noticed as your eyes drifted upwards, or at least it seemed like the chandeliers were draped in strings of gemstones that scattered the lights in every direction.
“Concentrate, girl,” Silco muttered close to your ear, making you shiver. “Remember why we’re here. Torek is over there,” he said, though you couldn’t possibly guess which of the guests he was indicating. “Do you remember your task?”
You dragged your eyes away from the spectacle before you to meet his mismatched eyes. “Keep his wife distracted while you get him to consider working with you. I’ve got it.”
“Good. We won’t need to stay long – an hour at most, then you can go home and do whatever you’d like. Maybe you can even catch Ran and Dustin.” As he said this the corner of his mouth tilted up, and you realised with some shock that the Eye of Zaun was teasing you.
You shrugged in what you hoped was nonchalance. “It takes as long as it takes. You know I’m not one to rush a job.”
“I’m aware,” he said as you started to make your way through the crowd, weaving through the throng as if you weren’t aiming straight for your unfortunate target. Perhaps it was because people knew he was from the Undercity, or maybe whispers of the things his people did in dark alleys and dingy establishments travelled ahead of him, but the dense crowd of people seemed to loosen before him, as if people suddenly remembered they had other places to be when he approached. If it offended him, Silco gave no sign, but instead he leaned in to you again. “He is close now. Laugh like I’ve said something terribly clever, you look petrified.”
“I’m fine,” you insisted, but you did as he asked anyway, and it seemed to help. The tension you had felt in the air around you receded a little, and before you knew it Silco was shaking hands with a tall, portly man. You barely heard as he introduced you as his guest for the night, your heart was pounding so loudly in your ears. Rupert Torek had an open, kind face, his eyes crinkling at the sides when he smiled, and he didn’t seem surprised that Silco had sought him out. You wondered if he had any idea how fucked he was.
“We haven’t met before! I’m Liana, Rupert’s wife,” a voice at your side said, making you start, though you quickly smoothed it over with a smile as you turned to the woman who had appeared next to you, introducing yourself and hoping you sounded like you knew you belonged here, just like she did.
Liana glanced between you and Silco, who had already captured her husband’s full attention. Her brows lowered slightly, and you wondered if she had suspicions about her husband’s gambling. “I didn’t know Silco had a partner,” she said carefully.
“Oh, we’re not…together,” you said, laughing airily. “I’m just accompanying him tonight.”
“I see,” Liana said, though now her smile seemed frozen in place, and you wondered if you’d offended her somehow. But nevertheless she called over a couple of her friends, whose names you quickly forgot, and for a moment you were very pleased with yourself. There was no chance Liana would try to join her husband’s conversation while you had her distracted like this.
It was at this point that things started to go wrong.
In hindsight, you should have realised what Liana thought you were implying when you’d said you were accompanying your boss, and what a topsider would think of that particular occupation. But you were a few minutes into a banal, vapid conversation with Liana and her friends about something that you weren’t really paying attention to before you realised that they all thought you were a whore he’d hired for the night, and apparently found this very offensive judging by the bladed smiles and barbed compliments that started heading your way. It didn’t help that you were inadvertently showing much more skin than any of them – and how you were supposed to know the current fashions topside, you had no idea. Pretty soon your fingers were itching to take off one of your high-heeled shoes and beat Liana’s face in with it, but you couldn’t exactly square up in the middle of a ballroom as if you were in a Zaunite dive bar.
So instead, you just played dumb.
You let the thinly-veiled insults, the insinuations that you didn’t belong among them, glance off you. Nobody spent their whole life in Zaun without growing their own kind of armour. Right now yours was keeping your smile frozen firmly on your face, and so Liana was too busy with you to notice that her husband was making a business deal with the Eye of Zaun himself, right under her powdered nose.
That thought made you glance over at Silco, and the second your eyes met his, you felt a strange sort of calm descend over you. Rupert Torek was still chatting away, not even a hint of discomfort on his round face. Silco gave you a minute, almost imperceptible nod, raising his glass of wine slightly.
It had actually worked.
You tried to keep your face blank. That only became harder when Silco turned his attention back to Torek and you realised that when you’d looked over at him, he’d already been watching you.
-
Soon after, you excused yourself to go to the ladies’ room. You were pretty sure Liana and her friends forgot all about you as soon as you were out of sight – or at least you hoped so. You didn’t want to know what they’d be saying about you as soon as you were out of earshot.
You didn’t head to the bathroom, though. Instead you went out the way you’d come in, not bothering to collect your coat from the doorman as you went down the stone steps as fast as you could without running.
As soon as you were outside, away from the glare of the house’s lights, you felt the tightness that had settled in your chest loosen. You hadn’t even noticed the anxiety creep under your skin with every barb Liana and her friends had thrown your way, but when it finally dissipated you wondered how you’d been able to breathe at all.
You should go back now that you’d got your fresh air. You couldn’t just disappear.
But one glance back at the shadowy figures moving through the ballroom windows had you moving away from the house, into the shadows of the grounds where nobody would notice the Zaunite girl who was hilariously out of place among them.
The pathways were lit by low electric lights, and there was nobody else out here. You chose a path along the edge of the grounds, shielded on one side by a high wall and on the other by a huge rosebush bordering the lawn. You weren’t sure whether you were really supposed to be out here, but nobody stopped you as you wandered further into the grounds. 
Eventually you found a bench and you sat down, tipping your head back to watch the stars in the sky. You’d only ever seen them when Silco sent you up to Piltover on business, and on those nights there was never time to stop and really look at them. Down in the Undercity it was difficult to see the sky at all through the smog, let alone the dozens of stars that shimmered through the haze of Piltover’s lights.
For some reason you couldn’t name, tears sprang to your eyes unbidden, and you tried to blink them away without ruining your makeup.
Of course, that was the moment you heard footsteps approaching.
“Drinking alone already?”
Your head snapped up to see Silco strolling towards you, and it was then that you realised you still had your glass of wine in your hand. You sighed, taking a sip as your boss sat down next to you.
“Just needed some air,” you muttered as Silco slung his arm over the back of the bench. It didn’t escape you that if you leaned back, he would have his arm around you. “How did it go with Torek?”
“I expect we’ll be getting a visit from him or one of his associates in the near future. His wife wasn’t too much for you, I take it?”
“I handled it. But they’re all just so…ugh.”
Silco chuckled as he pulled a cigar from somewhere in his coat, and you tried not to let the sound startle you. You’d never heard Silco laugh before, not even a little, and the sound was surprisingly warm. “Don’t worry, we won’t have to do this again for a while.” You watched as he held the cigar between his crooked teeth as he flicked his lighter, the strange angle of the lights highlighting his sharp cheekbones as he took a long drag.
“You know, I don’t think we’re allowed to smoke out here.”
“I don’t care.” He blew a long puff of smoke out into the crisp night air, staining it with a rich scent of tobacco and spices. “Is something bothering you?”
You searched for words to explain the anger tightening your throat, but came up with nothing that made sense. You were a numbers girl. Words were Silco’s thing. You shrugged. “It’s stupid. It doesn’t matter.”
“I’m asking, so I would say it does.” His voice had hardened, and you glanced over at him in alarm, though he didn’t look angry.
You didn’t want to push it, though, so you sighed and took a sip from your wine to buy a few seconds, feeling Silco’s mismatched gaze on you the whole time. “It’s just…all they did in there was bitch about things. What I was wearing, how I acted, their husbands, their lives. And yet…” you gestured vaguely at your surroundings. The gardens that must have needed a whole team of people to maintain. The lawn that sat empty when it could have grown enough food to feed a whole street of hungry Zaunites. The house. “They have all this, but it’s all they’ve ever had, so they can’t even see how privileged they really are. Meanwhile we have to scrape every penny just to put food on the table and some people in Zaun don’t even get that. If I lived up here I’d never complain about anything ever again,” you finished, and by now you were speaking into your wine glass, your eyes fixed on the ground.
Silco was quiet for a moment, and you didn’t dare glance up at him to see if you could gauge what he was really thinking. You’d never been so candid with your boss before, and you half expected him to leave and pretend tonight had never happened. The very last thing you expected him to say was, “What if I told you that tonight had been something of a test of your loyalties?”
Now you did look up, and he was watching you with that kind of calculated detachment he was so good at, though something in the hard lines of his face had softened. Or maybe it was just the moonlight.
“I don’t understand, sir.”
He took his time answering, taking another long drag of his cigar and releasing the smoke in a ring. “You’ve been with me a short while now, and you’re a very talented accountant. With your skills and some forged papers you could easily find work topside. Something with less risk and more pay.”
You flushed at his insinuation. “You pay me just fine.”
He rolled his eyes. “All wages are higher topside, you know that. You could have walked out of that house with a whole list of people who would pay you far more than I can for the same work, but you didn’t. Instead you stood there and allowed me to work on Torek while everyone in that room thought you were just some girl I’d hired for the night.”
You started to splutter a protest, but it died on your lips when you realised Silco was right. If you’d revealed your real job it would have raised Liana’s suspicions.
“It’s a long road ahead of us until Zaun is an independent nation. The topsiders won’t let us go without a fight,” he said, his voice dropping in case you weren’t alone in the gardens. “There will be times when you are tempted by offers of money, better jobs in better places, employers who won’t ask you to break the topsiders’ laws every day. I needed to know that you were true to the cause, that you would remain loyal to me even when you had the opportunity to make things easier for yourself.”
“You were giving me an out,” you said as it clicked into place. “Why now?”
“Because by now, you know exactly what you’re getting into by staying. Your choice to work for me is a genuine one.”
“So did I pass? Your test, I mean.”
“We would not be sitting here now if you had failed.”
You weren’t involved in the…bloodier side of Silco’s business, but you weren’t ignorant to it, either. You knew what he did to people he suspected of disloyalty. Would he really have let you go if you’d wanted? Or would you have disappeared into the shadows of the Lanes, never to be heard from again? You wouldn’t be the first. But then you realised that you’d never been afraid of that, because you would never give him a reason to doubt your loyalties. Zaun had to break free of Piltover, and he was the only one with the wits, the resources, and the sheer bloody-mindedness to finally cut the undercity free.
A sudden cold breeze blew in off the river, making the hedges surrounding you tremble, and you became acutely aware that you had left your coat inside. Before you could give yourself the chance to think better of it, you leaned back, and as you’d suspected, Silco didn’t move his arm. He didn’t quite put his arm around you, but he traced a circle on your bare shoulder with the back of his thumb, almost as if he was reluctant to touch you in case he scared you off.
“We can return to the party if you wish,” he said, and now he was near enough for his warm breath on your ear to send shivers along your skin that had nothing to do with the chilled night air.
“I prefer it out here.”
“As do I.” He held his cigar between his teeth as he reached into his coat and produced a small metal hip flask.
You couldn’t help but snort as he uncapped it and the smell of whiskey hit your nose. “You brought your own alcohol?”
He took a swig and then passed the flask to you. “Better than the swill they’re serving in there.”
“That swill is probably very expensive.”
“So is this. Drink.”
You took a small sip and were proud of yourself when you didn’t cough, even though the whiskey was strong enough to make your eyes water. A pleasant warm sensation spread out from your chest as you swallowed, though, and you shivered as you licked a drop off your lip. “Definitely tastes expensive.”
You looked up at him, and Silco’s eyes quickly snapped away from your mouth as he made a vague hum of agreement. For a while neither of you spoke, and you only passed the flask back and forth in companionable silence. The music that drifted towards you on the wind picked up in pace, and you heard the occasional drunken shout in the distance. Still nobody ventured into the dark grounds.
“Earlier I told you that you looked acceptable,” Silco said all of a sudden as he tapped out his half-smoked cigar and put it back in the tin. “I believe I should have told you that you look lovely instead.”
You felt a flush creep up your neck, and you risked a glance up at your boss – who had told you that you would look pretty on his arm, who had trusted you with this mission and had noticed when you slipped off to be alone. Nobody ever did that.
Maybe it was the whiskey. Maybe you were delusional or perhaps just stupid. You didn’t really know why you did it, but before you could think better of it, you leaned over and kissed him.
It was only a quick, chaste press of your lips against his, and you instantly regretted it when Silco stayed completely still against you. You jerked backwards, already apologising. “I’m so sorry sir, I shouldn’t—”
You didn’t get to finish your sentence. Silco’s hand was firm on the back of your neck as he pulled you towards him and kissed you. Properly this time. It was your turn to freeze in shock, but you quickly got over it as his tongue danced against yours and you tasted whiskey and smoke. You eagerly let him in as he deepened the kiss, shivering as his hand slid up your leg from your knee to your thigh, and for the first time that night you were glad of your too-short skirt.
You gasped in surprise as he pulled you onto his lap, barely breaking the kiss as he made you straddle him, your skirt riding up as your thighs spread. Feeling bold, you ran your hands through his soft hair, and he hummed in approval as you raked your nails through the short hair at the base of his neck. In response he gave your ass a firm squeeze, grinding you down onto his lap.
And onto the hard length beneath you.
You circled your hips against him as he moved down to your neck, holding you in place with a hand in your hair pulling just tight enough to hurt as he bit more than kissed you, leaving marks that would definitely be impossible to hide in this dress. You couldn’t give a shit. No way were you going back into that stupid party after this.
“Tell me how long you’ve wanted this,” Silco said, emphasising his point with a sharp snap of his hips up against you.
“I—” you started, but you could only focus on his hands creeping up your thighs again. Except this time, they didn’t stop.
“Go on,” he coaxed, as if you were supposed to focus on anything except his fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties. You hissed as he tugged them down and the cold night air hit your pussy, and it faded into a whimper as he trailed his fingers along your lips, pausing to circle your entrance in a way that made your back arch. “And don’t you dare try to lie to me, sweetheart, because you’re already wet for me.”
“Um…” you tried to focus on anything but the soft, barely-there brush of his fingers against your pussy. Every time you tried to grind against his hand he moved away, keeping his touch just a little too soft, the bastard. “I think – maybe…”
“A few weeks?” he prompted.
“Mm – no…”
He raised an eyebrow, but rewarded your answer by pressing his thumb against your clit, though he still refused to give you what you wanted. Needed.
“Months?”
“Longer. Since… I wanted this since my first day working for you.” Finally, Silco slid one long finger into you as his thumb drew an agonisingly slow circle over your clit, and your eyes fluttered closed in pleasure.
“Do you want to know a secret, my lovely?” he said, his fingers moving faster, obscene wet noises filling the air.
“M-hm.”
“I have you beat. I’ve wanted this since I interviewed you.”
Your eyes flew open at his admission just as he sank another finger into you without warning. Later. You could think about what he’d said later. For now you just let yourself enjoy the curl of his long fingers inside you, the expert ministrations of his thumb on your clit that sent waves of warm pleasure up your spine.
Until the bastard stopped.
He withdrew his hand from you, and his fingers glistened in the moonlight from your wetness. Your eyes widened as he licked them clean, then he motioned for you to stand. “Get up. Go and stand at the end of the bench.”
You followed his directions on shaky legs, and Silco followed, casually strolling around to stand behind you. You had a good idea of what he intended. He trailed his fingers up your bare arms, then fisted one hand in your hair while the other held your bicep in a bruising grip. “If you want this to stop,” he purred in your ear, “say the word now.”
You only pushed back against him, feeling his hard length behind you.
“I thought not.” Then he bent you over the arm of the bench, the ornate steel armrest digging into your hips as he lifted your skirt and pulled your panties down to your knees. You weren’t sure if you shivered with the cool breeze or the anticipation as you heard him unbutton his pants, his hand still in your hair. Then you hissed as you felt the press of his cock against your centre, arched your back as he slid it through your wetness before finally sinking into you as his free hand started playing with your clit once more.
Your voice rose in a high, keening cry as he sheathed himself inside you, easing the ache of his entry with his fingers on your clit. He stopped abruptly, pulling you up by your hair. “Hush now,” he hissed in your ear as he let go of your hair and shoved his fingers in your mouth. You could taste the echo of yourself on his skin. “You don’t want them to think you really are my whore, do you?”
You choked around his fingers for a moment before you relaxed your throat enough that you could shake your head and make a garbled nuh-uh sound, which earned you a low chuckle.
“I didn’t quite catch that, sweetheart,” he said as he started to move, setting a quick, urgent pace that reminded you that anybody could come around the corner and see you bent over a bench with the most powerful man in the Undercity driving into you from behind as you gagged on his fingers. Every thrust of his hips ground yours against the metal armrest, and you knew you’d surely have bruises in the morning. “I wish we were somewhere I could fuck you properly. Take you apart piece by piece until you’re nothing more than a writhing, crying mess in my bed. But perhaps you do like the idea of someone seeing you, seeing how well you’re taking me. How wet you are.” His breathing was becoming shallow as he fucked you, but that didn’t stop the stream of filth from his mouth. “I don’t know about you, but I would kill to see the look on Ko Shosu’s face when he realises we used his party to lure his friend into our web and then defiled his rose garden right under his nose.”
He said something else after that too, but you’d stopped listening to his words and let the low, rough cadence of his voice be the final push you needed over that peak you’d been approaching, once interrupted and now higher than ever. Even Silco’s fingers in your mouth weren’t enough to muffle your cries as you came, your thighs shaking from the strain of standing while your walls clamped down on Silco’s cock, over and over again in waves of agonising bliss. He followed soon after, and you felt a warm rush as he spilled himself inside you with a groan he muffled in your neck.
For a moment you both stood there, catching your breath. You sighed in relief as Silco removed his fingers from your mouth, and after tucking himself away he cleaned you up with a handkerchief before pulling your panties back up for you. “You felt just as good as I’d imagined you would,” he said softly, pressing a kiss to your abused scalp.
“Is that something you imagined often, sir?” you said teasingly.
“Most nights,” he murmured into your hair. “And perhaps some days, too.”
Well, damn. You had no idea what to say to that, other than, “Me too.” Maybe you had actually drank too much. “Take me home,” you said, leaning back against his chest as he straightened out your skirts. You felt him smile against your hair.
“It would be my absolute pleasure.”
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hihhasotherfixations · 8 months ago
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I’m thinking about dragon hybrid Price as a dad to little dragon hybrid you.
This is more headcanon style than my usual and a little bit all over the place but I had to get it out because yes >:3
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CW: none
Word Count: 1020
Price had always lived a solitary life. Dragon hybrids were relatively rare, and he didn’t exactly go out of his way to find a partner.
Purely by happenstance, he came across another. And almost out of obligation as well as it being mating season, they started a relationship. She quickly fell pregnant, but despite it all, it wasn’t meant to last.
Due to the more solitary nature of dragons, your mother left after you were born. Price didn’t blame her, the two hadn’t been incredibly close after all, only having gotten together during the mating season but not having an amazing connection beyond that. He was grateful she at least communicated her plan in advance so that he could prepare.
But when you were born, oh my. You were everything.
He took you home from the hospital alone, yet before he’d even gotten out of his car and into the house, he knew that a bond had formed that he could never sever.
Dragons were vain and prideful by nature. And for Price? His pride and vanity all poured into you. You were his. His creation, his child. He’d do anything for you, to keep you safe. And if necessary? He would protect you with the world as a shield.
The baby years are tough. Growing horns, wings and fangs is not pleasant. It can hurt and because of it, there are a lot of nights where you’re inconsolable, just crying in his arms as he tries to soothe you.
His wings folding around you seem to work best, creating a sort of cavern-like bubble where his warmth and heartbeat are the main sensations.
But even with that, the growing pains are sometimes too much and the poor captain had to lose sanity in favour of consoling you, rubbing ointment on your horns and massaging your tail and wings the best he could.
Yet the first time he sees your little tail wag when he walks into the baby room to feed you after waking you, all the sleepless nights are worth it.
You were starting to develop into a true dragon.
You stand in your box, holding onto the railing and bouncing excitedly on your feet. Your little horns poking through your unruly mop of hair while your wings are folded on your back.
“Hello, little lizard.” Price smiles, walking over to you. Immediately, you stick up your arms and he takes the hint, grabbing you under your armpits and lifting you up.
Holding you in his arms, he can feel you wiggle, trying to wag your tail - but you can’t.
Because now that your wings have finally started developing in earnest, he has needed to put preventative measures.
Where before your wings were papery and flexible, your tail stumpy and short, now both were getting some volume, the bones in them growing and lengthening - solidifying. And because of it, sleeping becomes dangerous.
In the past, many dragonlings have broken wings or tails by rolling around in their sleep, getting the limbs stuck under themselves and twisting too far.
Because of it, the wing-tail guard was invented. Used to pin said appendages against your body and cushioning them - allowing you to roll to your heart’s content while sleeping.
And now here you sat on his arm, the soft, black coloured cushioning moulded perfectly to fit your wings strapped to your back, your tail stuck between your legs, unable to wiggle or wag it.
“Come on, darling.” Price grinned, setting you down on the changing table and untying the straps, freeing your wings and tail back up.
And when your wings shift and move a little after he takes it off, oh how his heart jumps in excitement.
He’s been so eager, waiting for the day you finally open your wings for the first time.
For most dragonlings it happens around 1,5-2 years old. So you were right around that age.
He tries to encourage you by showing off his own wings. Anytime he has you on his lap, he spreads them wide, and you never fail to be completely mesmerised by it.
Seeing it, he tries to let you know you have your own, to encourage you to use them. He runs his hand down the muscles and bones of your wings, petting them down, getting you used to it by massaging the flesh and muscles, loosening them up.
It takes a lot of coaxing and weeks since you first tried, but finally, you manage to open up your wings and spread them.
And Price couldn’t be more proud.
Your wings are a carbon copy of his, except just a slight shade darker. And he knows that with a lot of training and upkeep, you’ll be just as strong a flier as he is.
Speaking of. Now that you’ve opened your wings for the first time? He can finally take you on your first flight.
Strapped to his chest with a harness, he gently stretches your wings out. It looks a little awkward, to have you dangling from his chest with your wings pancaked between your back and his front, but it’s important to get you used to flying, to using your wings.
The glee and pure joy that radiates off of you when you’re soaring in the clouds is unprecedented. You’re not scared, nervous or hesitant as he feared you might be, no. Instead, you’re kicking your feet, and screeching in delight. You keep tilting your head back to look at your dad and Price grins down at you, uncaring that your horns are stabbing into his sternum as his powerful wings flap, carrying the both of you through the sky.
The 141 know everything about you. Price can’t help himself. As stated before, dragons are proud creatures, and you are his pride.
He cannot help but share with the other most important people in his life.
And oh how they adore you too.
All in all, you are Price’s greatest treasure, and he can’t wait to see you grow up into your own, powerful dragon.
-
I would love to write more for this. If you want something elaborated or have your own idea and wanna see it written, please drop it in my ask box to give me an excuse to do so! ^^
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justawritterwithideas · 2 years ago
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law in pink | s.r
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♡ previous part | next part ♡
summary: A case takes them to Massachusetts, where you are reunited with your past and the people who carry it.
warnings: a bit of jealousy on Spencer's part, though overall nothing so far in this part.
this story is spencer reid (season 7) x ssa elle woods!reader
words: 1,185 words.
a/n: after a while, I finally bring you the third part of law in pink, the truth is that I've been wandering a lot about what to write, but I finally found it. I want to point out that this "chapter" will be divided in two or three parts (I'm not sure yet), to reward you for your time. Without anything else to add, thanks for reading.
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Working in the FBI field always ended up surprising you.
Not because every day was a new adventure, with new cases that could border on the edge of human sanity, but because it could bring you face to face with people from your past.
A new case had dragged you to Massachusetts, where you saw old faces you recognized on your way to the police station.
The conversation with Emily was what was stealing your attention, and even more so when it was about one of the topics you dealt with the most, besides the criminal code, and that was hair care. You had recommended a new product to the woman and she was talking to you about how good her hair looked, it even looked shinier than usual from both perspectives.
"I know! Plus, it's not tested on animals and their products are 100% natural, it's like a little bit of paradise in your hands." You commented sipping from your coffee, placed your bag to the side as you watched Spencer walk in with a folder in his hands and well focused on it.
It was no secret that after his gift it had caused the two of you to connect a little more than usual, and everyone could tell with the little love language gestures you each had on each side, like how every morning you gave him his coffee the way he liked it because you had memorized them or how he took care to save you a spot next to him on the jet where the sunlight would hit so your skin would get the vitamin D it needed for the day.
You quickly pushed away the chair that was in front of the map the opposite had drawn up and watched him sit down, returning to your conversation with Emily. Spencer thanked you with a silent gesture, causing you to smile as you listened intently to Emily converse about the difference in her hair from week to week.
But, their conversation was interrupted as Derek and J.J were entering the room with a box of donuts.
"The breakfast express had just arrived, ladies... And Spencer." The smell of frying and sugar made you immediately turn to the table to see that they had found just the donuts you had been chatting about a couple of days ago.
"Are those the gluten-free donuts? I haven't seen them in years, they look just as delicious as when I was here." Your voice let out a soft sound of joy, approaching the one glazed with pink and had a flower drawn on top. "These are the best donuts you'll ever taste, and it's also suitable for the gluten intolerant."
The sweet taste of the donut made you stir as you brought a hand to your mouth in surprise, it was as if the past had just slapped you in the face.
You turned in the direction of Spencer, who looked quite immersed in his work.
"Spencie." The man looked up at your call. You brought the doughnut close to his face and smiled, letting the scent of your 'Miss Dior' perfume permeate his nose. "Try it."
"Ah, no thank you. I am at the moment somewhat busy, Y/N..." His hand was trying to push yours away, plus you kept watching him with that look that caused Spencer to give you the whole world. "B-besides! I'm faithful to my chocolate donut with sprinkles-"
"With sprinkles on top... Come on, Spencer, I'm not asking you to eat it all, just taste it."
The tasting-not tasting fight they were carrying on was interrupted when Hotch walked in where his face showed quite a bit of annoyance.
"What's going on, Hotch?"
"The suspect's lawyer is in the interrogation room." Commented Rossi, who simply modulated 'he's a jerk'.
"He's coming to talk to us now." Finished Hotch, who was heading straight for a cup of coffee but didn't quite reach for it when a rather annoying voice interrupted him.
You didn't know if it was your imagination or the memories of that place that made you cough, the smell of expensive cologne and mint made you push the donut away from your hands. You set it down on a napkin, listening as it echoed back to that voice that once spoke honeyed words to you.
"Agents, a pleasure. I'm defense attorney, Warner Huntington III."
Where was the closest place to hide from that character? You thought, but you wouldn't let the man you used to call "teddy bear" get you down at that moment.
" Lawyer Huntington, this is the BAU team. Agent Rossi, Morgan, Jareau, Prentiss, Dr. Reid and Agent Woods."
Your gaze connected with Warner's, who let out a gasp of surprise at the sight of you.
"Y/N... Wow, it's been a while, darli-"
"It's good to see you, Attorney Huntington." You commented as you watched him from your position.
You watched him approach you, plus Spencer's body made it so he couldn't take any more steps than intended, well... Spencer's leg was the one that separated you, as he stretched his legs out, separating you both just enough so that nothing of your bodies would rub together in any way.
A safe distance for both of them, thanks to Spencer.
"You two know each other?" J.J. asked, who watched intrigued.
"We were coupl-"
"We were part of the same Harvard Law generation, actually. We both graduated, but we took different paths." You lied in front of them, and they could read it when Warner's face grimaced.
It was clear that the two of you had a bond that was more than close, but the way you didn't want them to find out was the answer to resolving that which the others had to find out until you decided to talk about it.
"Rather, both of us-"
"Counselor, what exactly is the reason you're here?" asked Spencer, who watched from his position, with that feigned smile you already knew how to distinguish.
"Ah, yes. I was coming to introduce myself as the defense attorney, as well as discuss the legal issues surrounding my client." He turned to look at Hotch, who was drinking from his cup with that face that the situation displeased him. "I'd like to discuss a few things with Agent Woods, since we both graduated from Harvard and have the same degree from-"
"Actually, Agent Prentiss is also a Criminal Justice graduate, you could discuss with her along with Dr. Reid in addition to Agent Woods."
The way Hotch had cut Warner off made you let out a small chuckle, thanking in the direction of the major, who was simply giving you a discreet wink.
"Yeah, right. Three's better than one, you're right." Warner's voice wavered a bit before he opened his mouth again. "Good, then I'll come by later to discuss these details, they're calling me from the firm, excuse me."
Silence immediately settled in the room, but before they could blurt anything out, you immediately turned in everyone's direction and blurted out.
"I have a good explanation for this, I promise."
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♡ first part | previous part ♡
If you like it, don't forget to like and repost it.
a lot of love, alme. ❀
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vixensdungeon · 6 months ago
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You've probably asked yourself
What are psychology mechanics in tabletop roleplaying games?
Or maybe you haven't, because that's a term used by like two people because it was made up by me. But others have come up with it before me! Warhammer, for example, uses "psychology" to mean effects like Hatred and Stupidity that modify the behavior of units on the battlefield. And that's thesame basic concept we're talking about.
Psychology is a game mechanic that represents a character's inner life and modifies their behavior. Some would call such a thing a "roleplaying mechanic," but those people are silly with a limited idea of what roleplaying is.
Psychology mechanics fall broadly into three categories, or three C’s. They are:
enCourage: if you do X I’ll give you a little treat Coerce: do X or suffer the consequences Compel: you do X
Encouraging mechanics seem the most in vogue in modern design, though I think the other two have their place. (I briefly considered naming the first one Consent but that wouldn't reflect how the mechanic acts upon the character, and in truth the player consents to all three by playing a game with such mechanics in it)
One game I think is particularly famous for its psychology rules, that being Call of Cthulhu with its Sanity mechanic, and I think King Arthur Pendragon deserves a nod for its passions and such, but we’re going to talk about a different one. Paradigm shifting in its time, seen as traditional these days, it’s Vampire: The Masquerade, the cool game for sexy goths!
To help us delve into the World of Darkness, we’ll employ the guidance of Malcolm Fisher, a Lick currently operating somewhere in England. Say hi, Malcolm!
I knew the vixen was trouble the moment she walked into my life, with an air of mystery and danger, and thighs that-
Ahem, yes, thank you. I think we don’t need to hear from Malcolm anymore, wouldn’t you agree? Instead we’ll use his character sheet to explore the various psychology mechanics in Vampire.
Vampire 5th Edition doesn't actually have an example of encouraging mechanics that I can remember (correct me if I'm wrong), so we'll briefly dip into its predecessors for that. Malcolm has two archetypes, a Demeanor and a Nature. In his case both match: Enigma. Whenever Malcolm acts in accordance to his Nature, in this case by perplexing other characters through actions that turn out to make sense in hindsight, he regains spent Willpower. This encourages Malcolm to act a certain way.
V5's compulsions are, despite the name, a coercive mechanic according to the terminology I made up. When Malcolm suffers a bestial failure on a roll, he might suffer from a compulsion. We'll assume that in this case it's not the one specific to his Clan, Malkavian, but rather one of the generic ones: Paranoia (still appropriate for him). Any action not taken to disengage from any perceived threat suffers a penalty. This coerces Malcolm to act a certain way by punishing him for doing otherwise.
Finally we have the big one, Frenzy. This prevents a player from saying something to the effect of "I would simply not flee in terror from fire." I'm terribly sorry but that's not for you to decide. Unless one decides to ride the wave and not resist the frenzy, the Storyteller takes control of the character. Seeing a large bonfire after a particularly draining investigation, Malcolm fails his Willpower roll and falls into a terror frenzy. He will flee from the fire in the most expedient manner, whether the player wanted to or not. This compels Malcolm to act in a certain way, because he has no other choice.
And there you have it. That's the general gist of psychology mechanics.
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bunbun-mochi · 8 days ago
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Parent Children moments - Shorts
Sylus
no proofreading, just Sylus and his daughter's cute fluff moments
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The room is dim. Many people sitting at the long table, some tapping their fingers on the table while some chatting.
This is the first time their boss were late.
Very late, in fact.
"Where is he?"
"Did he forgot he have a meeting today?"
As if to answer their question, the door opened.
Sylus walked in, holding a bundle in front of him that was covered by his suit coat. The closer he walked toward his seat, they started to see some glimpse of the bundle.
Few threads of white silver hair and a small hand holding onto his dress shirt.
It is a child. Their boss took a child to a meeting?
Few hours ago...
You sighed as you tried to soothe your daughter. She was feeling sick and uncomfortable, screaming and crying. Tiredness in your eyes as you hold her, trying to rock her to sleep. However, the screams and cries were louder and you sighed in defeat.
As you continued to rock your daughter, you failed to hear the door open. Footsteps walk toward you.
"I'll take care of her," A deep voice rumbled behind you. "Go to sleep."
You shook my head, "You have a meeting to go to. It's okay."
Sylus gently took the toddler from my arms, "It's ok. I can always have Luke and Kieran deal with the meeting if needed. Go sleep."
Perhaps Sylus is naturally warm or because your daughter loves her father more than her own mother, her cries get quieter when Sylus holds her.
You crawled into bed and Sylus draped the blanket over you.
"Thanks, love," I whispered.
"Don't mention it," Sylus pecked my forehead.
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Sylus sat at the end of the table, holding a child. They are all confused. When did their boss take in a child? Did he and his wife have a kid? Although their minds were filled with questions, none dared to ask.
Sylus waved his hand and the meeting started while he continued to hold his daughter in a shoulder hold. His hand drawing soothing circles on his daughter's back, soothing her discomfort. His coat covers the majority of her so no one can see what she looks like and keeps her warm.
As the meeting went on, his daughter switched several sleeping positions. Started off with her head sleeping on his shoulder, then moved to sleep on her back, then twisting and turning, and now she's sleeping on her stomach.
Sylus smiles slightly as his daughter quietly snoozes in his arms. Although it's rare to see his genuine smile, the people in the meeting room knew it was not the first time. His first genuine smile was toward his wife. And connecting the dots, they realized that their boss in fact had a child. He had a child and no one knew.
The meeting was near the end when a small voice called, "Dada."
Sylus looked down to his daughter, "Yes, baby?"
His daughter used her fingers to try to tell her father what she wanted. Sylus smiled, "Water?"
She nodded. Sylus gestured to a servant nearby. Within seconds, her father brings a cup of water. She drank it thirsty and gestured to her father that she wanted more. Her father smiled and got more water. She only drank half of that cup before going back to sleep.
Sylus watched as his daughter shifted in his arm, trying to get comfortable. And once she did, she immediately fell back to sleep. He gently lifted his coat, covered his daughter, and gently kissed the top of her head.
Perhaps having his daughter attend the meeting with their boss is much better than they thought. Their boss's mood seems to be a lot better than usual. The meeting went by without a hitch. As much as they hate to admit it, that small child saved their life and their sanity.
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borathae · 1 year ago
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“Yoongi joins you in your bath and you talk about your days.” 
Pairing: Vampire!Yoongi x f.Reader 
Genre: established relationship!AU, Fluff 
Warnings: casual & intimate nudity, Yoongi being the cutest bean in love 
Wordcount: 1.3k
a/n: I lose a lil bit of my sanity each time I write fluff. I can handle anything, but fluff always ruins me 😔 i love them so much 😔
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You spent the day working in the gardens. It was a very rewarding day and left you feeling utterly content.
Content, but also very exhausted and very dirty. So you hopped into the shower for a quick rinse off and while you did, let the bathtub fill with the hottest water. You used  some of the lavender oil you made with your flowers and then lit some candles to set the mood. Ten minutes later, you were boiling in your little lavender soup, getting rid of all the tension in your muscles.
It is another ten minutes later when a faint knock on your door rips you out of your relaxation.
“Yes?”
“It’s me”, Yoongi says.
“It’s open.”
The door opens and in steps Yoongi. 
“Oh? Sorry”, he gasps, turning around, “why didn’t you say something?”
“Why are you turning away? You’ve seen me naked a million times before.”
“I don’t know, just don’t wanna be rude.”
You laugh, “you’re so weird”, you chuckle, “what’s up? Do you need help with something?” 
“No it was…no it’s fine, it was dumb”, he dismisses you. 
“No, it’s okay. Tell me.”
“It’s nothing, I’m dumb, just wanted to ask for, you know…”, he lowers his voice to a whisper, making it unable to understand him. 
“I didn’t get the last part.”
“I just wanted to…”
“Yoongi, you are talking too quietly. I can’t understand you.”
Yoongi whips around, “I just wanted to ask for cuddles!” he blurts out and pouts, “it’s dumb, okay?” he adds in a shy mumble and his eyes flitting to his feet.
“Aww my love, it’s not dumb. You’re so cute”, you coo, resting your chin on the edge of the bathtub, “do you wanna hop in here? The water’s so nice.”
He rubs his tummy, inspecting you with his head tilted to the side. 
“Mhm?”
“I guess”, he mumbles, “if you’re asking.”
“Yeah? That’s so awesome. Hop on in here then.”
“Look away.”
“I’m even closing my eyes. See?” you say, closing your eyes with a faint smile on your lips.
You listen to him get undressed. Silence follows where he walks to you. You are aware that his nature helps him stay quiet. A soft knock against the tub makes you open your eyes. 
Yoongi is looking down at you with his hands gripping the edge of the bathtub and one leg pulled up. 
“Don’t look”, he whines.
“I’m not, I’m looking at your eyes.”
He mumbles something, which is most definitely a shy complaint. Then he finally steps inside. 
“Oh geez", he gasps, lowering himself slowly, "what the fuck’s wrong with you? Why would you wanna boil yourself like that?”
“What do you mean? It’s not even that hot”, you say in a laugh. 
He lowers his butt into the water and tenses up.
“Yes it is”, he complains, “you’re gonna get cooked ballsack for dinner, like fuck.”
He cracks you up to the point where you snort ungracefully. In the time you spend laughing your ass off, Yoongi lowers his own ass into the water, submerging himself in the lavender warmth. 
“Don’t laugh”, he nudges you with his foot, “if I knew Imma get boiled, I’d have declined.”
“Oh you dramatic baby”, you snicker, closing the distance between you and him, “and yet here you are. You just like to complain”, you say, cupping his cheeks even if your hands are wet. 
Yoongi doesn’t mind, leaning into your touch.
“I guess. I’m getting used to it”, he smiles boyishly, “and I thought that I take hot baths.”
“You gotta admit though, once you’re used to it, it feels amazing.”
“Yeah, it’s nice. Relaxing. That’s nice.”
“Yeah right? And your ballsack isn’t boiled either, is it?” you tease.
Yoongi snorts and chuckles. 
“No, it’s good. It just expanded twice its size.”
“Oh you”, you laugh. Yoongi does too. “Don’t talk like this, it’s nasty.”
“Why? It’s natural”, he laughs. 
“I guess, but it’s so weird", you tease.
“You regularly tell me about your shits. I don’t ask for these kinda updates either, but you tell me”, he throws back, making you laugh.
“I guess, yeah”, you snicker and then lean in to peck his cheek, “you’re wonderful.”
Yoongi leans in for another kiss. One you give him gladly. He returns the favour afterwards. Two kisses on each cheek. He ends all of them with a soft kissing sound. It borders the sound of “mwuah”, just shorter and tinier. It feels so good to receive.
“Did you scrub yourself already?” he asks afterwards, massaging your waist gently.
“Yeah in the shower. I took a shower to wash off the day. I wanted the bath to be solely for relaxation.”
“Mhm, I see. That’s good.”
“Why? Did you wanna scrub me?”
“No, it’s fine. Just thought you needed help.”
“You can still touch me, you know? I like it when you do.”
“You do?”
“Of course I do. Your touch is gentle and loving. I stopped being touch starved because of you.” 
Yoongi lowers his eyes shyly.
“Me too”, he confesses, “yeah. Your touch is nice too. I like it. It feels good. Yeah.”
“Yeah? Should we touch each other, my love?” you suggest.
He nods his head and opens his arms, scooting closer. You understand. You close the distance and allow your bodies to connect in an intimate hug. No barriers of clothing between your skins, hot water to warm you up and the relaxing scent of lavender in your noses. The hug feels especially wonderful like this.
Yoongi hides his nose in your neck while you nuzzle your cheek against his shoulder. His arms cradle you just as much as yours cradle him. Your middles are touching, your chests are melted together and your legs are never breaking contact. It’s so utterly vulnerable and yet healing. To be able to hold him like this is medicine to your heart. You don’t even need to be sad for him to heal you. His hug is so powerful that it will heal even the parts which were never broken. 
“This is so nice”, you whisper, having your eyes closed. 
“Yeah”, he sighs, enjoying your hug with closed eyes.
“Did you have a good day, my love?” 
“It was okay”, he says.
“Yeah? Did you manage to finish the song?” 
“Not yet. I got stuck on the bridge. I don’t know what to do. So I stopped and did something else.”
“Mhm I see. I bet you’ll get it soon.”
“I guess. Can you help me with it tomorrow? Can you listen to it?”
“Of course my love, I’d love to do that”, you say, rubbing circles into his back, “can you help me with the garden? I need to carry the palm trees to the terrace, but they’re too heavy.”
“Of course, I’ll help”, he says, drawing senseless patterns on your back. 
“Thank you, my prince.”
“It’s fine yeah”, he says and nods his head. Then he nuzzles closer, kissing your neck gently, “you smell so good.”
“It’s the lavender oil.”
“No, not the oil. You smell nice. Happy.”
“I am happy”, you say, “and you? How are you feeling?”
“I’m happy too”, he says. 
You shimmy back so you can look at him, but he whines and pulls you back. 
“Don’t do that, it makes me sad.”
You snicker, “forgive me for wanting to kiss you.”
“You can do that later. I wanna hug.”
“Okay, fine. I can very gladly live with this deal.” 
“Good. I wouldn’t have let you leave either way.” 
You laugh, “oh wow okay, I see how it is.”
He snickers and nods his head, kissing your neck afterwards. 
“My love?” he whispers.
“Yes, my love?”
“Can I keep going?”
“Mhm?”
“Can I keep kissing your neck?”
“Of course you can. You don’t have to ask.”
“Okay. Mhm, you’re so perfect”, he whispers and begins kissing you, purring quietly as he does. 
You watch a movie once you finish the bath, relaxing on the couch with cups of tea and your bodies snuggled close. Yoongi falls asleep with his head on your chest, but denies it once you wake him up. Then later in bed you kiss his face until he falls asleep and you follow him seconds later.
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c0wgurlz · 1 year ago
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Trouble On My Left, Trouble On My Right
Chapter 2: Operation, Find Caroline a Cowboy
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gif by @bodybebangin
Kayce Dutton x Reader/OC - Friends to Lovers
He doesn't even have to take half a step to catch back up with me. “Come on Caroline, you know I’m just teasing you.” He pats my back as a peace offering. “Although,” Okay, maybe not. “I have it on good authority that I can please the ladies, so save a horse and all that.” Winking flirtatiously, he belts out a laugh, finally removing his hand from my bare back. And what a blessing that is, because if he had kept touching me while talking about… that, I’d be liable to combust.
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Chapter 1
Sorry it took me so long to update! I'm a teacher and my free time is fairly limited. We're at a point in the school year now though that is much less stressful, so expect fairly regular updates, at least for the next few chapters.
Comments are so appreciated! I'd love to know what ya'll like and what ya'll think I could improve upon.
As always: I do not own Yellowstone (2018) or any of its characters. This work is not monetized.
THIS FIC IS CROSSPOSTED TO AO3. It is not posted to any other site. I am lookingcold on AO3 and that is all. I do not give permission for my work to be posted by others to any other platform.
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We don’t talk for the rest of the walk, but the silence is comfortable, like it always is between us. Kayce and I have never asked too much of each other, have always read each others’ moods as if they were our own, and that apparently hasn’t changed from the five years we’ve spent apart. It’s glaringly obvious to us both that neither is up for idle chit chat. 
And while I’m really not up for small talk, the silence does, unfortunately, give me entirely too much time to overthink. What felt like such a natural decision, what felt like fulfilling my duty this morning, now feels foolhardy, and quite possibly too risky. Now this isn’t to say that I’m doubting my choice. Helping Mr. John, helping Kayce, helping the family and ranch that raised me, that picked up my pieces and glued me back together over and over, is a no brainer. Helping the people and the place I love most in the world feels as natural as breathing. But smoothing over a murder? That’s- No, I’m not doubting my choice, but I’m sure as hell doubting my sanity. When I said the Duttons needed a criminal defense lawyer, not a PR specialist, I wasn’t exaggerating. And if I’m being honest, this job feels more like that of an accessory than a public relations consult.
The front porch of the big house comes into view well before I’m ready. This dinner may be a reunion of sorts, but it’ll undoubtedly be a business meeting as well. Steeling my nerves for such talks doesn’t come quite as naturally to me as it once did. I feel like a knight with rusty armor. Weak at critical points, weak where it matters. More aptly, I feel like a little girl again, staring into the headlights of a train with no way to move and no way to stop it. I’m no coward, please don’t think that of me, but you know that feeling of impending doom? The one that makes your spine tingle and your stomach drop to your knees? Dread is probably the best word. That’s all I can feel as I stand at the bottom step of the Dutton’s porch. 
I must hesitate for too long, or stare off into space, or look absolutely fucking terrified, because in a flash Kayce is back down the two steps he’d already taken and by my side. He doesn’t say anything, you’d think we’d taken a vow of silence, but just looks at me imploringly, resembling a curious puppy so much I almost crack a smile. And then Kacye, sweet Kayce, wraps his calloused hand around mine and tucks it against his chest, over his heart, before tipping his head, ushering me up the stairs. Once I’m half way up I get a fond, “Atta girl,” and what woman doesn’t love being praised like an obedient mare. I snort in response and kick out my foot to trip him, but only a little bit, on the last stair. Can’t have hime getting too full of himself.
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Dinner is nice, but rather awkward if I’m totally honest, mainly due to the fact that Beth and Jamie are in attendance. Let’s just say Gator clears the table well before dinner should truly be over. To my surprise, we don’t talk business, but rather I’m questioned, interrogated really, over what I’ve been up to the past five years and why haven’t I called and would it really kill me to send a text every few months. Beth is the one who leads this inquiry. Jamie and I were never particularly close, so he remains silent for the most part, and he leaves in a huff shortly after Beth throws a fork like it’s a trident directly at his forehead. Can’t say I blame him, even I can only handle so much of Beth when she’s at her worst.
My interrogation is blissfully, or so I thought, cut short by Mr. John when he asks, “So, ya’ll have any plans tonight?” He folds his napkin meticulously, trying to look nonchalant but missing the mark by a shameful amount. If I thought that feeling of dread had left me, I was wrong.
I narrow my eyes and prepare to defend myself against an interrogation of a different kind. Before I can grit out a suspicious, “No, why,” however, Beth pipes up. “Actually Daddy, since you asked,” at this she turns to me, “Caroline, how do you feel about heading into town and getting gloriously drunk and then gloriously fucked? You’ve been gone far too long, so you’ve got to be re-initiated, re-tainted if you will.” She looks me up and down, assessing. “You’re far too shiny, like a little cherub.”
Jesus Christ, I think she’s suggesting I fuck a townie. And Mary and Joseph I haven’t even so much as kissed someone since my divorce - ok, well maybe a peck or two here or there, but that’s besides the point. Here I was, so worried about talking business, about skirting around the subject of murder, only to be blindsided by an age old Dutton scheme. Operation: Find Caroline a Cowboy. Well if Beth thinks I’m about to get biblical with some rando she is absolutely, positively looney tunes. Now, how to communicate all of that in a tactful way? Taking a shallow breath, I part my lips and prepare to spout some placating, buzzword bullshit. Something along the lines of, “Well, as fun as that sounds, I’m actually really tired. Maybe later this weekend?” or “How about we just kick back in the bunkhouse tonight, save the salaciousess for this Saturday?” Before I can even utter a word though, Kayce butts in on my behalf.
“Do you maybe think you could save the corruption for later, Beth? I’ve already promised the boys that I’ll bring Caroline around for cards tonight.” While his voice is calm, casual even, Kayce gives himself away the moment he begins to bounce his leg, the tap tap tap of the heel of his boot loud in the otherwise quiet room. He’s uncomfortable, maybe even irritated, which aren’t we all at least a little bit when speaking to Beth, but there’s something else. A boyishness to his demeanor that I haven’t seen since high school. There’s also the fact that we had decidedly made zero plans to visit the bunkhouse tonight. So. Interesting.
I’m certainly not the only one to notice his odd shift in behavior, as Mr. John’s lips curl into a smirk and Beth’s face arranges inself into a pleased, self-satisfied expression. She frequently wears the look of someone who knows enough to destroy literally any given person’s life, but this look is more playful, one of a cat that’s pinned a mouse by its tail. Ignoring Kayce, she turns her attention back to me. “Caroline, sweetheart, don’t even think about screwing any of those cowboys. I know old habits die hard, but trust me when I say not a single one of them is worth a ride.” Now, to be clear, Beth knows, I know, Mr. John knows, and even Kayce knows that Beth has only ever screwed one of said cowboys out in that bunkhouse, still, her dig elicits the desired reaction from Kayce. And furthermore, she makes it clear that she’s not just trying to set me up with any old cowboy. I’m on to her. Operation: Find Caroline a Kayce.
With a cringe of disgust and a flushed face, he exclaims, “Fuck’s sake Beth, I’m not taking her out there to pimp her out.” He’s stopped smoothing the tablecloth, but now he’s exasperatedly running his hand through his still damp hair. Shit, Kayce. You think he’d have learned by now how to not play into Beth’s hand. Some people just have to learn the hard way I suppose. 
Beth’s eyebrows lift and the corner of her mouth quirks. “Well you’re not a very good bestfriend then, are you?”
“Fuck you.” Kayce mutters, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms petulantlly.
“Maybe you should be saying that to her.” Beth points at me with her napkin, dropping it onto her plate as she rises from the table. “This has been fun. Possibly the best family dinner we’ve had all year.” Planting a kiss on Mr. John’s cheek she says, “Love you Daddy, have a drink with me later, will you? I think we should talk.” Then, rounding the table to me, she strokes my hair, almost motherly, “Caroline, sweetheart, clear your schedule Saturday. Me and you are going to paint the town red.” Finally, reaching Kayce, she sighs, “Goodnight, dummy. Let me know if you’d like help finding your balls.” And just like a tornado, she’s there wreaking havoc one moment, and gone the next.
The dining room is uncomfortably silent for a beat after she exits, until Mr. John blessedly breaks the awkwardness yet again. “Beth’s antics aside, I don’t think ya’ll should be going out anywhere tonight. We’ve got several important meetings lined up tomorrow morning and I need both of you sharp. Especially you Kayce, tomorrow will require you to tell a very particular version of events and I can’t risk you fucking that up. Alright, Son?”
Looking slightly cowed, Kayce nods his head in agreement. “Alright.”
Having determined this hell of a dinner has gone on long enough, I begin to make moves to excuse Kayce and myself. “Dinner was delicious Mr. John, thank you for having me. And thank you for such fine company.” I may be lying out of my ass, but my momma didn’t raise me to be rude.
Mr. John exhales a dry laugh and rises from the table. It’s moments like this where his and Beth’s resemblance is striking. “No need to thank me, honey. You’re family, you’re welcome at my table anytime.” Pushing in his chair he surveys Kayce and I with calculating eyes. “Why don’t you two head on home, you both look like you’ve been put through the wringer.”
Gee Mr. John, I wonder the hell why?
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Our walk back isn’t nearly as silent as our walk to the house. To say Kayce is pissed would be putting it lightly. “What in the actual fuck was all that? I mean, Beth was no surprise, but what shit is Dad trying to pull?”
“Kayce, your daddy barely said a word.” I’m more focused on the words left unsaid.
“He didn’t have to say anything Carrie, he sat there like a smug bastard and let Beth say it all for him.” Kayce may as well be pitching a fit the way he kicks at the ground, arms hugged tight to his chest like a wronged toddler. Honestly, the image is kind of amusing, so much so that I have to stifle a laugh. I must not do a good enough job, because I can feel the glare that Kayce shoots through the side of my head. “What?”
Not wanting to add fuel to the fire, I’m quick to hide my growing grin. “Well first off, I’m gonna overlook the fact you pulled out my forbidden nickname. But second, do you remember that Christmas when we were thirteen? How Beth hung mistletoe from literally every single doorway, and how your daddy actually enforced the kissing rule?” I raise my eyebrows high, daring him to conveniently “forget” an awkward moment from our childhood as he often pretends to do.
The tips of his ears turn pink, but he sighs his agreement. “Yeah I remember, we must’ve kissed two dozen times. At the time I thought dying would’ve been a kinder fate.”
Asshole. I punch him in the arm, hard. “Wow. Thanks a lot. The sentiment is shared.” Rolling my eyes and checking for invisible dirt beneath my nails, I continue. “Anyways, what they’re doing now, Beth and your daddy, is just an enormous escalation of what they did then. I don’t think Mr. John will rest in his grave until I give him a grandbaby - with you.” I look at Kayce pointedly. It’s no secret that Mr. John, and Beth by extension, have been holding out hope that me and Kayce would fall madly in love and have lots of babies. When Kayce married Monica the teasing and hinting stopped, after all Mr. John would never disrespect their marriage in such a way, and when I married Judd it was almost like a fence went up between us, between myself and the Duttons that is, but now that both of our spouses are out of the picture? I’m certainly not surprised the trouble has started back up.
I expect Kayce to splutter and turn a darker shade of red. Despite his gruff exterior he’s always been reserved and easy to embarrass. He surprises me though when he mutters, “Maybe we should just give him what he wants then. Get him and Beth off our backs.”
I shock myself with the cackle that bursts its way out of my body. It bubbles out partly because of the utter glee I get from Kayce having a sense of humor for once and partly from the insanity of such a suggestion. “So you’re telling me, that your solution to getting your daddy and Beth to leave us alone, is to have a baby together? Yeah, because they definitely would have no interest in our love lives after a stunt like that.” I bump his hip with mine. “I can just hear Beth now, ‘I’m thinking a Fall wedding, you look horrible in bright colors and nobody wants to wear a suit in eighty-eight degree weather.’ We’d never hear the end of it.”
Kayce shrugs, shooting me a wry grin. “Hey, if we marry each other at least we’ll know what we’re getting into. No surprises.”
“Yeah, and no sex,” slips past my lips before I can swallow it down. What a stupid fucking thing to say. Good job Caroline, talk about fucking, or not fucking, your best friend some more why don’t you. Now I’m the one who’s blushing. Pink from the roots of my hair to my chest. And what a fatal mistake I’ve made by opening my fat mouth. My whole life I’ve had to be one step ahead of Kayce, embarrassing him before he can embarrass me worse, yet here I am giving him a golden opportunity.
His grin only widens. “I hate to break it to you Carrie, but to make a baby people have to have sex.” He slings an arm around my shoulders, adding insult to injury. “You know when a man loves a woman…”
I elbow him in the ribs before he can continue. He laughs at my embarrassment just as much as he groans from the pain. “Oh shut up.” Now I cross my arms, increasing my stride so that his arm falls from my shoulders.
He doesn’t even have to take half a step to catch back up with me. “Come on Caroline, you know I’m just teasing you.” He pats my back as a peace offering. “Although,” Okay, maybe not. “I have it on good authority that I can please the ladies, so save a horse and all that.” Winking flirtatiously, he belts out a laugh, finally removing his hand from my bare back. And what a blessing that is, because if he had kept touching me while talking about… that, I’d be liable to combust. If Kayce had always been shy and reserved in his day to day life, where I had been bright and obnoxious in mine, the topic of sex is where we switched places. I think calling myself a prude may be a tad harsh, but I certainly have never been one to broadcast my sexual business. Kayce on the other hand has never shied away from flirting, or kissing, or having sex in nearly every one of Mr. John’s pastures - you don’t get someone pregnant at nineteen by keeping it in your pants after all. 
Playing the game I had with Kayce in the bathroom earlier today had felt safe, probably because I was the one in control, but this battle of wills feels altogether different, like someone is poking at an insecurity, at a bruise I didn’t even know I had. It’s confusing at best and humiliating at worst. Throwing his words back at him, I huff, “Now Kayce Dutton, you know this conversation is entirely improper, so I suggest you drop it. And also,” I whirl around on the step I’ve just taken. Thank God we’ve reached the foreman’s house because I don’t know how much longer I can participate in this back and forth before I’m forced to will myself out of existence. “Who says I’d even want to have a baby with you? Good authority or not. I know ya’ll’ve gotten new ranch hands since I’ve last been here, all of whom I haven’t gotten to size up yet. You never know, maybe one of them is babydaddy material.” I poke him firmly in the chest. “Don’t assume I haven’t got options.” Before Kayce can respond I storm up the remaining steps and into the house, kicking my boots off perhaps a bit too aggressively before striding into the kitchen. What I plan to do in the kitchen, I don’t know, but I still don’t know which room I’m staying in and the living room feels too cozy to stew in, so the kitchen it is.
Kayce saddles in much more calmly, but his fierce expression gives his true feelings away. “Are you serious?” He grunts, and if I wasn’t so embarrassed, mad, confused, hurt - for some reason that alludes me, I might have found the rocky timbre of his voice sexy. 
“Serious about what?” I avoid his gaze petulantly, pouring myself a glass of water for a lack of anything better to do.
“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” He groans, tipping his head back and rubbing at his eyes. “Are you really picking a fight over whether or not we should get imaginary married, have imaginary sex, and have an imaginary baby? You do hear how crazy that sounds?”
“So now I’m crazy?” My voice is cool, and serious, even though at this point I realize I’ve lost the argument. Even though I’ve realized there never should’ve been an argument in the first place.
Any fight Kayce had left in him drains away. I see the moment that it leaves his body, his eyes softening and his shoulders relaxing. “Caroline, honey, what’d I do?”
Almost as if there’s an invisible string connecting us, my body relaxes too. I blow out a breath, dump my water down the drain, and come to stand in front of him. No island between us. “You didn’t really do anything, just poked at a sore spot, that’s all.”
Sensing that this may be a conversation best saved for later, Kayce graciously changes the subject. Scratching at the back of his neck with one hand and gesturing towards the bathroom with the other he murmurs, “Well uh, if you still wanna have that spa night we should probably get going, we’ve got a early morning tomorrow and if I’m gonna let you take my spa virginity we’ve gotta do this thing right.” That earns him a hard exhale, the ghost of what could’ve been a laugh. But he must know not to expect much else, that I’m still nursing my bruised ego, because he carries on. “So why don’t I go get that bubble bath started and you can sort through your uh lotions and potions, decide on how best to pretty me up. And then maybe we could talk, about anything you want.” He begins to walk backwards, making his way towards the bathroom. It’s odd to hear the soft pad of his socked feet on the hardwood and not the click of his boots, but also kind of nice, endearing.
“Okay,” I breath, “Yeah, that’d be - that’d be nice.” I move to walk past him, into the hall where I’d left my bags. “I think you’ve got a bit of a sunburn so I’ll see if I’ve got an aloe mask for you. If you plan on putting yourself back on the market you’d better start taking care of your looks.”
I’m very purposefully facing away from him, so I don’t see the melancholy on his face so much as I hear it in his voice. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s likely to happen. My days of chasing tail are definitely over.” I don’t reply, not too keen on opening that can of worms further, and so an uncomfortable silence settles over us. It’s only broken when Kayce sighs, “Well, I’ll uh, I’ll be in the bathroom whenever you’re ready.”
Still looking down, I pause the mindless shuffling I’d been doing through my bags, “Alright, just give me a few minutes.” Having found the masks I was looking for well before now, I finally rise from out of my crouch, left knee popping in protest. “Like you said, you deserve a proper first spa night,” I turn my body to reveal my profile, pretending to check the label of the plastic tub in my hands, “I’ve gotta make sure I pull out all the stops. You know I don’t half ass anything.” Feeling generous, I finally offer him a small smile, turning to fully face him.
The relief in his eyes catches me off guard. “Don’t I know it.”
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I don’t know what I expected when Kayce said he’d go run a bubble bath. Too absorbed in my own thoughts, I didn’t consider that such an activity is typically done alone, certainly not with a friend, and even more certainly not with a totally platonic, albeit sexy, boy bestfriend. When I finally make my way into the bathroom however, I’m greeted by the sight of Kayce settled into the comically large clawfoot tub, chin tucked to his chest so that bubbles cling to his beard, eyes unfocused and contemplative. “Didn’t realize I invited Santa Claus.” I joke, at a loss for anything else to say. Too scared to say the wrong thing or ask the wrong question.
At the sound of my voice his head jerks up, the sudden movement sloshing water just shy of the lip of the tub. “Santa Claus?” He furrows his eyebrows. He really does look like a puppy.
“You’ve got bubbles,” I gesture to my chin, miming a full beard.
He chuckles, “Oh, yeah, I guess I just got bored and,” he shrugs, “I’ve gotten used to playing with Tate in the bath. You’re lucky I didn’t break out the bubble mohawk.”
“The bubble mohawk?” I giggle, “I don’t know, I think I’d like to see that actually. Just make sure I’ve got a camera on me when you do break it out, yeah?” Lining my “lotions and potions” up on the counter, I look away, still trying to figure out what exactly is going on here, or what Kayce expects me to do, to say.
He must sense my hesitancy because he volunteers, “I hope I got the water hot enough. I know how you women like to scorch your skin off, but I’m afraid I’m just a bit too delicate.” He’s pushed himself into a full sitting position now. The water pools just under his chest and it takes everything in me to meet his eyes.
“So we are taking a bath together then?” I huff. “Because that’s not weird at all.” Still, I move to pull my blouse up and over my head, clipping my hair up so that it no longer hangs down my back. “And if you’re not actively in pain, then no, you don’t have the water hot enough. But that’s alright, I’ll manage.”
Ignoring my comment about the water, his eyebrows furrow once again in confusion. “Why’s it weird? You’re the one that suggested it.”
“No. I didn’t.” I shoot some side eye at him, because who in their right mind would suggest such a thing. Hopping around to remove my socks before balling them up and tossing them into the hall so that they don’t get wet, I continue, “And it’s weird because usually when grown adults take a bath together it’s only because something else is gonna follow.”
Rolling his eyes, he insists, “Yes. You did. You said you normally take a bubble bath for spa nights, so here we are, taking a bubble bath. And it’s not weird. I’m wearing my underwear, and I assumed you’d wear yours too. It’s no different than going swimming together.” He sounds way too exasperated for a conversation that is this stupid.
Remember how I said Kayce and I have never had trouble reading each other? Yeah I take that back. Closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I sigh, “That was not a suggestion. That was a statement. But thank you for the clarification. Now before I literally die of embarrassment, would you like the lavender hair mask,” I forcefully lift one colorful jar into the air, and then another, “or the apple?”
Looking as fed up as I feel, Kayce responds gruffly, “The lavender.”
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Tag List: @cheneyq @targaryenpower @starset21 @darlingmunson30 @ilovemrytleturtle @screechingtriumphtiger @chlo-feigh @twoheartedfool @softi92 @hannahufflepuff @its-moonblr
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aphroditelovesu · 8 months ago
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Heyaaaa, how are you, babe? Can we have a Yan!Platonic Nico di Angelo and Yan!Platonic!Percy Jackson with a daughter of Poseidon ‘reader’ (aka Ayane Ishikawa my OC XD), pretty please? They discussing who would be the best big bro to Ayane lol 🥺🥺
❝ 💀 — lady l: hii, babe! I hope you like it. It's a little short and very soft yandere, but it's more focused on their relationship, which, by the way, I'd love to hear you describe! 👀
❝tw: none, i think? just fluff and very soft yandere.
❝🌊pairing: platonic yandere!nico di angelo, platonic yandere!percy jackson x daughter of poseidon!reader.
❝word count: 850.
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You loved your brothers. You really did. Percy was always protective and the comical relief you needed sometimes and Nico was sweet and protective of you too, but he was less controlling than Percy.
You sometimes found it funny how they were always fighting over you. Percy was really your brother but you considered Nico as your brother too. The son of Hades became attached to you the moment you, Percy, Annabeth and Thalia found him with Bianca at that school. His protectiveness only increased after his sister's death.
You loved them deeply. You would be willing to die and kill for them and you knew the feeling was mutual. But sometimes.... They were a little too much to deal with and you liked having a moment alone, something that since your arrival at Camp Half-Blood had become almost impossible.
You remembered your first day at Camp Half-Blood. Percy was excited to show you everything, from Thalia's Pine Tree to the Big House. Nico, on the other hand, seemed more reserved when you first met, but you knew he was only concerned about ensuring your safety. The first days were full of adventures and discoveries, but also a lot of responsibilities and hard training.
There were days when everything seemed like a whirlwind. The missions, the training, the council meetings... Percy and Nico were always by your side, but sometimes, you missed a moment of peace. A moment of your own.
One afternoon, after a particularly grueling workout, you decided you needed some time to yourself. Leaving a simple note for Percy and Nico – "I'm fine. I need some time alone. I'll be back soon." – you ventured out of Poseidon's cabin. You walked into the forest near the camp, a place where the sounds of nature offered a welcome solace from the chaos of the camp.
You found a small clearing, lit by the afternoon sun. You sat down on a fallen log, taking a deep breath and letting the calm surroundings wash over you. It was the first time in weeks that you could hear your own thoughts.
The only company was the dryads and some satyrs looking for these dryads. You smiled as a dryad waved at you and turned into an oak tree.
As you were lost in your reflections, remembering peaceful moments before your life turned into a whirlwind of battles and quests, conflicts with gods, and your relationship with your divine father, you heard a faint rustling in the leaves. You looked around, your heart racing a little, but you relaxed when you saw that it was just a curious squirrel. You just hoped your brothers weren't spying on you like they had many times before.
Time passed quickly, and before you knew it, the sun began to set. You knew it was time to go back. Although you loved your brothers and the camp, you knew that these moments of solitude were essential to maintaining your sanity. You stood up, feeling refreshed and ready to face whatever came next. And you knew that what would come next would be a whirlwind of questions from your brothers.
When you returned to the cabin, Percy and Nico were waiting for you, with mixed expressions of concern and relief. Percy was the first to speak, ''Are you okay?! We were worried.''
You smiled as you saw the concern in Percy and Nico's eyes, and realized how much they truly loved you, "I'm fine, really.'' You replied, trying to reassure them. ''I just needed some time to think.''
Percy sighed, clearly relieved. "We understand, but next time, give a little more notice, okay? We almost set up a search of the entire camp."
Nico, who had remained silent, finally spoke up, ''We know you need time for yourself, but you're important to us too. We want to make sure you're safe.'' There was an intensity in his voice that showed how seriously he took his responsibility to protect you and you knew that this responsibility, this protection came from a pain that he would always keep within himself.
You nodded, understanding their concern, ''I know, and I appreciate that. I promise I'll let you know better next time.''
As if there will be a next time.
That night, instead of going out for another training session, the three of you decided to spend time together, just talking and laughing. Percy told funny stories about his first days at Camp Half-Blood, while Nico, a little more reserved, shared some memories of his childhood with Bianca.
You loved them and you knew it. But they tended to become increasingly overprotective when you decided to leave without warning. They hated it when you did that. Were you that naive? The camp might be safe but they didn't trust the other demigods and gods. Nico and Percy that night, after you fell asleep, made an oath to each other.
You wouldn't go out alone anymore. And they would be sure that you would obey that. It's not like you really have a choice.
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yanderenightmare · 17 days ago
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Do you normally get any 'ew, you're disgusting' shit in your inbox? I just now posted my first incest fic and got one like 'i hope you don't have any siblings lalala'. Prior to that, I was like "how do these authors go untouched by antis?" but then I realised that it was a tad bit naive of me lol. I was going to respond with a taunt but decided to just delete it because it wasn't worth the effort.
Are they frequent and are they easy to ignore?
On Dealing with Haters/Critics
Good question! I was actually going to make a post on this, as others have asked me the same thing, so here we go!
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♡ Personal experience!
I get my fair share of hate from time to time—more often when I publish things that are more taboo than other excepted things—for example, like you say, incest, as well as bestiality, wide age gap, born-sexy-yesterday readers, etc.
It's an odd thing, as haters will often accept the fact that I write rape for titillation but will take issue with these other tropes. But anyway, we can talk about the nonsensical opinions of haters all day, but it wouldn't really do us any good.
So, here's my advice.
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♡ First off, accept that haters are gonna hate!
Some people won't like what you write. And that's fine. The problem is that they feel the need to tell you that—at which point, you'll just have to console yourself by telling yourself that no decent person would be rude to a total stranger whom they don't know the first thing about and, therefore, whatever they have to say warrants neither second thought nor reply.
With that being said, however...
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♡ You gotta do what feels right!
Engage or don't engage, do what you need to feel at peace. Sure, you can be the so-called bigger man and ignore all the meanies, but you absolutely don't have to!
Of course, we can be cool as cucumbers and say, "Not worth the effort," but who are we kidding? This is Tumblr, and you're allowed to rant when you want in whatever manner you want!
So, if you feel you gotta bite back to maintain your sanity, then that's what you should!
However, I do believe there's a way to go about it!
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♡ Never go to bed angry!
This is my personal advice, but if you ever choose to acknowledge hate or critique, do so with tact and with based and factual arguments instead of slinging heated insults in return.
This way, you walk away from the fight feeling good about what you've said and not worse off than before. In other words, don't stoop down to their level.
I actually feel in many ways that answering hate can be rather therapeutic this way, as you've succesfully turned something negative into soemthing positive!
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♡ The difference between hate and critique!
Actually doesn't matter. You're not really obligated to answer either if you don't want to.
But for the sake of differentiating the two: "Ew, you're disgusting" is hateful slander, but "Incest is wrong, and you're actively condoning it by writing what you write" is a genuine critique.
And it bears repeating, you don't have to address either because you don't owe anyone anything.
People are entiteld to their opnions just as much as you're free to disagree, and ignore if you want!
But something I've found is that explaining it to those who don't understand why we write such things, and furthermore why people want to read it without being interested in such things in real life, is actually quite a rewarding thing to do!
And by that, I mean it might make your critics and haters understand and rethink their comments, but it can also help your existing fans deal with their own similar self-loathing, and lastly, it's even great for your own mental health for when you yourself doubt your own mental standing!
Personally, in regard to the example I used above, when I get hit with the "you're condoning this and that" I just play the argument that those who play violent videogames aren't condoning the killing carried out by their avatar. Naturally, when roleplaying a fictional version of ourselves, we're not actually playing as ourselves.
Some people have a very hard time understanding this for some reason.
But anyway, moving on.
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♡ Final advice!
Ignore and delete any and all the dumb, off-handed comments you feel like. If and when you want, return their rudeness with a cheeky smile and a slap on their ass. Be as cordial as you can be but as sassy as you feel you must—like an aged Queen who drinks her fair share of likewise wine.
But whatever you do, don't ever make things personal!
Though that's also my personal advice. I think, by making personal attacks, you're not being factual anymore, and you'll only feel worse for it. And by personal attacks, I mean calling people ignorant, dumb, awful, etc. You can, of course, say that their chosen words were in ill taste, but going after them themselves won't make you feel better. So, I'd suggest avoiding it.
Anyway, hope this helps!
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donttxtathebeach · 1 month ago
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Forever & a Day| chapter 1 : Where the waves meet
Setting: A Quiet Beach in Charleston , South Carolina — A Year Before They Officially Start Dating ;starts off July of 2019 after drew started shooting season 1 of obx.( I don’t think that’s when they started shooting but for my sanity and how I planned this out it is )
warning: none:)
Word count: 1k
previous|next
masterlist
summary :
A lot of old feelings resurfaced. And while they tried to play it cool, you could tell there was something there. History? Chemistry? Maybe both. The beach turned into more than just a relaxing spot—it became the place where the past and present collided in the most unexpected way.
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It was a picture-perfect Charelston day—a serene, sun-kissed beach with the sound of waves crashing against the shore, the salty breeze ruffling through the air. The sky stretched out in a brilliant shade of blue, the horizon blurred in the distance where the ocean met the sky. Y/N Williams, 21 -year-old (almost 22) supermodel who had been living her life in front of cameras since she could walk, was finally taking a well-deserved break. The kind of break that didn’t come often enough.
The beach house, nestled on the quiet coast of charelston , was her home, having moved out of her parents house as soon as she graduate, not because she did not want to be around them but becase she wnated to have her own space to be her. It was her sanctuary—a place to escape the chaos of the fashion world. Her mother, Maliah, had taught her to love the sea, while her father, Austin, had always been her rock, showing her how to navigate life’s challenges.
For the next few days, Y/N, along with her closest friends, Hailey Bieber and Sofia Richie, were here to recharge before the new fashion seasons kicked off. They’d spent most of the day lounging in the sun, enjoying the sound of the ocean and the laughter that filled the air. The girls were only all together for a week before all getting thrown back into their normal routines. She had suggested that they come visit her hometown, knowing how grounding the beach was. Y/N was in her element—no makeup, no cameras, just the soft light of the afternoon sun and the soft, rhythmic pulse of the waves.
She had thrown on a simple bikini, her tan skin glowing with the golden warmth of the sun, her hair perfectly framing her face falling into the most perfect beachy waves, her natural hair. People say it's fake but thanks to her mother's genetics her tan stays all year long. She had the kind of effortless beauty that only came when she was far from the spotlight. They had just gotten back from the store, oppting for buying grocieries for the week instead of going out for meals. She stretched her legs out on the towel, content and peaceful as she closed her eyes, feeling the world slow down.
Hailey adjusted her oversized sunglasses and leaned back, her smile wide as she took in the view. " I still can't get over your face when I pulled into the trader joe's parking lot, it was truly pricless" Haliey starts. " What that car is like my baby, I just wanted to make sure she was in the right hands" Y/n states like its obvious. “This place will never not amaze me ” Hailey changes the subject.
Sofia, lounging on her stomach next to them, half her face hidden behind large round sunglasses, joined in with her signature sass. “Seriously, this is like apainting in real life. I need to get myself a place like this.” the girls have all been here before, but never at the same time. Having grown up modeling together, if you had at least one of them, another was attached at the hip. She had formed a sister like relationship with sofia and a very special bond with haliey.
Y/N smiled lazily, a soft chuckle escaping her lips. “It’s home,” she said, a fondness in her voice. “Nothing like a little south Carolina sunshine to reset.”
She let out a deep breath, feeling the weight of her busy life melt away for a moment. Here, she was just a girl by the ocean, no one to impress, no cameras in sight. Just the sound of the waves and the cool breeze.
Elsewhere, a little further down the beach, Drew Starkey was caught up in his own world. Drew, who had become a household name playing Rafe Cameron on Outer Banks, was just another guy on the beach, his damp hair still dripping from an earlier swim. He was playing a casual game of football with his younger brother, Logan, both of them laughing and teasing one another in the carefree way only siblings could. Drew, had ditched his shirt a while agoleaving him in navy swim shorts, his athletic frame moving fluidly as he chased after the ball.
“Catch me if you can, Logan!” Drew called over his shoulder with a grin, clearly relishing the competition.
Logan, not one to back down, smirked and darted after him. “You wish! I’m about to leave you in the dust!”
They sprinted across the beach, the friendly rivalry lighting up their faces. He moved with that confident, natural athleticism, but as they both ran for the ball, it took a sharp turn to the left, just out of their reach. Neitherof them had noticed how close they were getting to where Y/N and her friends were lounging.
Then, the inevitable happened.
Drew’s foot caught awkwardly on the sand. In a split second, his body lurched forward, and before he could regain his balance, he tumbled right into Y/N, crashing down on top of her with an audible thud. The world seemed to pause for a moment, and then a copious amount of sand flew everywhere, covering her and her towel.
Y/N’s eyes snapped open as she felt the unexpected weight land on top of her. “Oh my gosh… what the hell ......Wait Drew, is that you?” she gasped, the words tumbling out in shock. her mind was going crazy, how could it be, was it really him. the boy she had fallen in love with all those years ago. " who is Drew" Hailey moths to sofia, even though she knows who it is sofia just shrugs her shoulders trying to watch the scene in front of them unfold.
For a moment, time seemed to freeze. Drew was sprawled on top of her, blinking in disbelief. It had been years since they had seen eachother; he had heard how she was doing becuase his sister brooke, the two having been attached at the hip since they could talk , and the occasional instagram stalking whenever he found himself on the app; which was a very rare occassion. All those times they hung around eachother growing up became a distant memory once they both went thier seperate ways. The realization hit them both at the same time. Drew—her old childhood friend—was here. On top of her. At the beach behind he house , of all places. They hadn’t seen each other in years, not since they were kids, playing on the beach, their families spending summers together.
The last time Y/N had heard anything about Drew was from the his sister and that was not even a week ago. Y/n had called Brooke to let her know that she would be out of town with a few friends, but wanted to let her know that they needed to schedule lunch when she was bak in New York. Brooke and y/n saw eachother often, living in the city had it's perks. it allowed them to meet up when both there schedules allowed it. Y/n frequents New York Hvaing opted to buying her own place since Modeling Season caused her to frequent the city for shoots.
Drew scrambled off her quickly, his face turning red from embarrassment. “Oh my god, Y/N, I’m so sorry! I didn’t see you there!” he said, his voice a mixture of panic and humor. He ran a hand through his damp hair, still laughing nervously as he brushed the sand off his body.
Y/N, still in a daze, sat up and blinked a few times, processing the situation. A small, surprised laugh escaped her lips. “I mean, seriously, Drew?” She chuckled, shaking her head, trying to make sense of the fact that the Drew , was the one who had just crashed into her on her beach towel. “You couldn’t have picked a better landing spot?” she laughed.
Drew’s grin was sheepish, and he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, clearly flustered. “Yeah, that was not my finest moment,” he admitted, looking up at her. “I was just—y’know, I got caught up in the game with Logan, and—uh, I misjudged the jump. I swear, I’m usually better at this.”
Y/N raised an eyebrow, brushing sand off her stomach as she laughed softly. “Well, I’ll give you credit for one thing. You gave me an unexpected exfoliation. So, thanks for that.”
Drew laughed, the sound rich and warm, as if the awkwardness of the moment was already starting to dissolve. “Hey, I’m nothing if not helpful,” he joked, feeling that familiar comfort between them starting to resurface.
Logan, who had been standing off to the side, watching the entire thing unfold, finally called out with a laugh. “Nice form, Drew! You definitely took her out with that one!”. Drew shot his brother a playful middle finger before turning back to Y/N. They fall into comfortable scilence before y/n begins to speak " Oh these are my friend'sHailey and sofia, they're here to unwind before our schedules get hectic again" y/n states ignoring the questioning stares she is getting from her friends.
He smiled at them, as the warmth of old memories bubbling to the surface. " it is nice to meet you guy's maybe not what you pictured your day to look like i presume" he laughs, the rest of them following suit lightening up the atmosphere. “Okay, seriously though, I’m really sorry about that. I didn’t see you guys until I was already going for the ball.” His voice softened with sincerity, something that only a few people could get from him. “I hope I didn’t ruin your day or anything.”
Y/N couldn’t help but smile, her face softening. “You didn’t ruin anything,” she said, the warmth in her voice surprising even herself. She paused, then teasingly added, “But next time, maybe check before you launch yourself into the air?”
Hailey, who had been watching from a distance, called out playfully, “I hate to ruin, whatever this is but i'm not going to act like I am on the same page as sofia .” she laughs.
Sofia, with a raised eyebrow and a mischievous glint in her eyes, added, “Yeah, so you are going to have to catch Hailey up on everything, because i'm still a little lost on the whole Childhood friend lore”
Y/N flushed slightly, the color rising in her cheeks. She laughed, trying to keep things casual, but her eyes lingered on Drew for a beat longer than she intended. “We’ve known each other since we were kids,” she said quickly, shrugging it off. “Our families are close, his sister brooke, you guys rember brook and I are really close .”
Drew, noticing how Y/N’s gaze seemed to linger, raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, exactly. Old family friends. And now I’ve just made an unforgettable first impression. Perfect,” he said with a grin, trying to lighten the moment.
He glanced over at Logan, who was still laughing, and then at his parents, who had been watching from a distance. Drew turned back to Y/N, giving her a smile that carried the weight of the moment.
“Alright, well… I’m gonna go rescue my dignity and grab a drink. I totally owe you for this, Y/N,” he said, his tone light but sincere.
Y/N, still smiling, brushed the last of the sand off her towel. “hey don't worry, accident's happen Drew, it truly is no big deal.”
Drew’s grin widened as he gave her one last look. “You got it,it was nice well..... falling into you ” he said, before turning back toward his family, still laughing at himself.
Y/N watched him go, the familiar ache of nostalgia stirring deep inside her. It had been years since she’d seen him, but standing there in the soft glowof sun, it felt like no time had passed at all.
As Drew walked away, Hailey and Sofia exchanged a knowing look, clearly sensing something between them that Y/N hadn’t quite admitted to herself. Hailey leaned in with a smirk. “So… that didn’t seem like ‘nothing.’ that was not a "just friend's" encounter ?”
Sofia, always one to poke fun, grinned widely. “Yeah, I’m not buying that ‘old friends’ excuse. What’s the real story here, Y/N?”
Y/N chuckled, shaking her head, though the blush on her cheeks didn’t quite fade. She glanced out at Drew, who was now a few yards away, talking to Logan.
“I don’t know… I guess it’s just… good to see him again,” she said softly, her tone more thoughtful than she intended. She wasn’t sure if it was the familiarity or the unexpectedness of it all, but something inside her felt like it had just shifted.
The air between them was electric, even if she wasn’t quite ready to admit why.
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sevenop · 2 months ago
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Billie Eilish x Fem!reader: Connected
A/n: Billie is your under-bed demon that plagues you with nightmares every night to feed his hunger. She has no shame or any boundaries of decency, but she is the one who comes to your rescue when the world around you begins to fall apart, rumbling. When no one seems to notice you, content with your outward calm while inside everything is crumbling infernally.
Warning: suicidal thoughts, heavy atmosphere.
Inspired by "bury a friend."
Happy Halloween, dudes. Even though I'm late! xd 🦇
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You come home as badly as you always do: you pile into the hallway so loudly that Eilish can hear everything perfectly well even in her sub-bed kingdom behind your closed bedroom door. You walk in as usual, but she senses that something is wrong. And no, it's not just the demonic flair for your emotions and thoughts, which for her resemble today especially viscous ink, splashing through the edge of sanity with their bituminous blackness in your skull. You jingle your keys, tossing them on the nightstand carelessly instead of putting them down neatly, walking twenty steps instead of the usual six, as if confused in a familiar space, you not shouting a greeting to her from the doorstep, disturbing her peace. You are different. And she notices it. In every possible detail.
Seven more extra steps and you confirm her hunch absolutely undeniably: you walk into your own bedroom quietly, toss your bag of university notebooks into the corner (it almost whistles like a bullet, slicing through the air and slamming onto the floor, spilling pens out of its «mouth», notebooks, phone and other stuff), and on top of that you press your back against the newly closed door and slide down it so bruised and tired that even Billie feels sorry for you for a quarter of a second. And to pity the dream demon that devours people's nightmares every night, it really takes a lot of effort.
"Someone in a good mood tonight?" Eilish snorts her usual sarcasm, hiding beneath the darkness of your bed and even beyond that, the dark haze of dusk beginning to fall outside from your window, and you don't even throw her the usual and ungracious "shut up!". You cover your face with your trembling hands, resting your head against them with a ragged exhale, and you don't drop a word. Now this is where Billie tenses up. What a day rich in phenomena. "My dear little human, what's the matter with you?"
"What do you want from me?" It's as if your voice mirrors the amplitude of your palms: also trembling, only barely more noticeable. You hesitate for a second, and then complement, mentally tentatively 'jogging' the numbers on the dial. It's almost ten o'clock. Usually, at this time, Eilish is already delicately annoying your elderly neighbors from the apartment across the hall with their early bedtime routine and feasting on their nightmares. "Why don't you run from me?.."
"What are you wondering?" She says, not even paying attention to your questions. It's not that she doesn't care, but... Just a 'but'. Demons don't need to answer to anyone, it's not in their nature. "I can feel the weight of your thoughts even from here, and it's rather... unaccustomed."
"What do you know...?" You whisper hoarsely, warily looking into the impenetrable darkness beneath the bed through your fingers. Honestly, Eilish is flattered that you're at least giving her a bit of your gaze right now. She's attention-hungry, but for some reason she's not taking offense today. Everything's going to hell today. Intriguing.
The bed creaks a little as she clings with her pale, cold alabaster hands from the darkness of the under-bed to the white blanket crawling to the floor, the soft mattress, and the sturdy wooden kingpins. A moment, and you see her face in all its glory: with neat and mesmerizing features, framed by untangled (she repeatedly steals your combs), long teal strands of hair, which makes her demonic eyes, shrouded in an impenetrable white veil, stand out especially strong and contrasting. She's in no hurry to come out in one piece, but she's not hiding either. It's like she's probing something, waiting.
"Your talk'll be somethin' that shouldn't be said out loud." She summarizes coolly, staring at you piercingly with her white solid sclerae. Your mind is her filing cabinet, she knows she can read you from and through with unobtrusive ease, but stays clear of the impromptu "allowed" boundary you've marked out to her many times, as many times experiencing collapse. Has the mighty demon of dreams just today suddenly started to take your rights into account? Or is it just more interesting? To play, to pry sounds, letters out of you..?
You bang your head lightly against the door, lean the back of your head against the cool varnish of the same sickly white-colored wood, and shift your gaze from her to the serene and at the same time pressing down on you ceiling, and exhale so heavily, as if you wanted to squeeze the soul out of your entrails. Ungodly hard, ungodly painful... Words sinfully and so fucking stuck in your throat, as if a swallowed blade were tearing and slicing your windpipe lengthwise, only upwards instead of downwards. You want to say something, but you can't. Fuck.
Billie rustles again in the back of your mental filing cabinet, drowning in black ink, and having dug something up, she comes out of her world of darkness and horror in one piece: a slight rustle of fabric, an even lighter creak, and she stands swaying in front of you in her white, shapeless and huge clothes, looking like a ghost. Short, but so powerful, able to make a mess of the whole neighborhood, if not the nearest three at once, with just a puppy of her fingers. Eilish is like a pendulum, attracting already scattered attention with sound and glitter: a dozen silver chains and pendants around her neck, steel rings on her fingers, and several thin bracelets on her wrists with flashing crosses and other figures. It all tinkles and clinks pleasantly as she moves, glistening, hypnotizing, giving off a slight chill... Beautiful. Insanely beautiful.
"Come here." Her velvet voice rustles pleasantly, drowning out the rustle of her paranormal white clothes as she invitingly opens her arms for a hug. And you swear that five more seconds and you'll be ready to burst into tears. And you don't deny yourself that. Because it's not every day that a nightmare demon expresses a desire to embrace you, inviting you into her bonds of arms, because you realize that you can no longer. Because aspidically, to the point of anger at everyone and everything on your soul is painful and lousy. That's why you spring springily, puppet-like, and push your palms away from the door, which resembles a tombstone today rather than a beautiful piece of embossed wood on hinges. That's why you bump your nose somewhere on her neck, the very tip running along the thin, smooth skin. That's why you cling to her as if your carcass is weighing over a sharp-edged cliff and about to plummet downward. Hypothetically, it is. You've fallen off the edge of your thoughts. And there's no way she's going to say she likes feeling you so close to her. You're such a contrast: warm, weak, broken... She won't say any of those things, but she will hug you so gently and tenderly that every demon who has ever lived and still exists today would condemn her for it. Well, if them dared.
"Say it, spit it out," she settles gently with you on the soft pile of the blue carpet without unclasping the ring of her hands, "what is it exactly?"
"Today, I'm thinkin' about the things that are deadly." Your voice is muffled by the soft fabric of her t-shirt, as if someone had put a silencer on the gun's rumbling single-shot silencer beforehand. The words rhyme so amusingly and effortlessly with Eilish's line that you want to giggle for a second. Billie tenses up like a string: she has long suspected such a thing from the chains of your thoughts she read, but it's still unexpected to hear you say it head-on. You're a smiling perpetual doofus, aren't you? Her favorite smiling perpetual doofus. She can't keep quiet anymore.
"The way I'm drinkin' you down," she reads your unspoken thought of your own irrelevance, which dangles in the inky-black sea of your depressive thoughts like a bright and teasing float. Grab it, and it will drag you like a multi-ton anchor to the very bottom. Not the top. "Like I wanna drown, like I wanna end me."
You frown softly, sniffing your nose. Understanding demonic confusing aphorisms is still difficult. Billie laughs velvetly and clarifies, and her dark, docile shadows wrap around you in an affectionate haze, stroking your shoulders and arms with her, tickling your neck as she places her palms masterfully on your shoulder blades, as if hiding your scarred but incredibly strong angel wings from everyone: "In the language of demons, it means that you are very important to someone. You are very important to me, Y/n."
"Say..." You snuggle closer to her, though it feels like there's nowhere closer to go. Gently open your fragile hoop of arms behind her back, hugging back. Billie shakes quietly, like a piece of paper in the wind. "When we all fall asleep, where do we go?"
"Careful." She whispers softly as one of her nimble shadows gently lifts your chin, forcing you to look directly at her. You see the blue, cool irises of her eyes for the first time, not the bottomless white sclerae, but exactly the ocean irises. Similar to human... The spirit is so breathtaking that you involuntarily open your lips on an exhalation, and she takes advantage of this momentarily: she kisses you softly, even if she accidentally, absolutely unintentionally bites your lower lip a little. She can't be contained, she wants to. And it's not only about kiss: she wants to protect you and show you exactly how important you are to her, so that you clearly understand everything. And you do.
You are a little person, who say that silly, uneven to her endless longing and ungodly expensive in human realities "I love you" and she's had enough. She is a powerful dream demon, whispering quietly that she will sleep with you in her arms tonight so she can chase away your bad dreams and inky thoughts. And you've had enough.
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