#takenaback

[oatmealdaydreams]

Ya know I want to see in books? Fuckin' trigger warnings.

I want it to be right before the damn Table of Contents and warn readers that "hey, this book has these things in it, so be careful".

I literally discovered a trigger of mine because of a book I was reading, because it didn't have a warning about The Triggering Thing.

Why do only fanfics have warnings on them? I feel like original books n such should also have trigger warnings. It doesn't have to be Big Fancy, it just needs a simple "this is what the book gots, be careful cause it may trigger you".

And no, trigger warnings aren't spoilers. They tell the reader what to expect that may hurt them, and that's it.

For example: major character death doesn't mention who dies or how or why or when, just that someone dies. Death is a trigger. It needs a warning. That way, if someone proceeds knowing there's death in there, they can mentally prepare to handle it so it doesn't cause significant harm to their mental being.

Put warnings in your novels and books and such.

[littlepadika]

Outbreak Day Eve

warnings: daddy!joel, fem little, ddlg, cute fluffy daddy time

Tomorrow was the anniversary of outbreak day which meant everyone in Jackson had the day off. No work or school or chores. The exception was patrol. Most people wanted to be with their families so it was always hard to pick who would have to patrol on this most important day. It was a day of mixed emotions. Some people liked to grieve what was lost. Some people treated it more like a celebration akin to 4th of July. With the heat of the summer lots of people were having picnics and cookouts.

Harper, who was head of patrol, was surprised when Joel asked for time off. He never asked for time off. If anything he was the one who volunteered to work on holidays. But Harper could tell there was a change in the man over the last year. Something about being with you.

"You got it, Joel."

"You sure? I know lotsa people are askin'." Joel is takenaback

"You've never once asked for a day off. Picking up extra to help out everyone else... you enjoy your day off kay?" Harper waved him off.

He was so excited to tell you. He came home and wiped his boots off on the door mat.

"Petal?" He turned to see you sitting at the table drawing. "Hey... whatcha makin'."

"Everyone at the daycare was drawing pictures of stuff from before da outbreak. I wanted to make one." You don't look up because you are deep in concentration.

"Oh yeah?" Joel comes over and sits next to you. He peers over your arm.

"See daddy..." You point at each of the details. "Das us at a moobie theater. Dey used to have moovies on big big screens. All new ones all da time. And see you holding popcorn. I like the popcorn here but Miss Thomas said it was really yummy at the moobie theater."

"That's right." Joel smiled, almost tasting the butter on his tongue.

"Did you see dem?" you ask.

"Oh yes. All the time." Joel leaned back in his chair. "The seats were big and comfy. You could get special glasses that would make the movie look three dimensional- like it was coming out of the screen."

"What!"

"And the popcorn was tasty but you also could get soda and candy all sortsa things...yeah I think I miss them a lot too." His smile falters a little as he stares out the window. He used to take Sarah to the movies on saturdays. It started with cartoons then more girly movies but Joel didn't care. He loved watching her eyes light up with imagination. He wishes he could share that with you as well.

"I sorry." you frown, not liking to see your daddy sad.

"s'all right." He seemed to snap out of his daydream, turning back to you. "come here and give your daddy a proper hello."

You hop out of your chair and into his lap. "I missed you daddy..." You hug him tight. He was so warm and solid and felt like home. He hugged you back just as hard.

"And I got good news baby! I get the day off too."

"Yay!" You bounce on his lap.

"So what do you want to do? We can go for a hike. We can do crafts. Whatever you want."

"What do you wanna do?" you ask, feeling very big for thinking about your daddy.

"Whatever you want." Joel reiterated with a squeeze of your thigh.

"No daddy." You furrow your brow. "Is outbreak day and you were there so dat means is daddy day."

"That what it means, petal?"

"Mhm." You nod feeling even more like a big girl. "That's what dey said. Do somefing you miss"

"Mm well... I guess I miss..." Joel thought of movie theaters, of baseball games, of concerts, of swimming pools... barbecues with neighbors and friends...

"What! daddy!" You cup his scruffy cheek.

"It's- i'm not sure we have one."

"What!" You exclaim, hating the not knowing.

"It's a slip'n'slide." Joel smiles at your eagerness. "It's uh a long mat that links up with the hose and we would slide down it.:

"Let's do it, daddy!" You bounce on his lap again.

"I want to." He chuckles. "I gotta see if I can fashion one." His mind already coming up with ideas. He missed building things. This would be a fun challenge

"I wanna help!"

"Of course you do, you good girl." Joel kisses you gently. "Why don't you draw a design for daddy to use."

"Okay!!!" you squeal.

Joel digs out a long tarp which is fairly slippery. The yard is small but at an angle there's a decent track for the slide. He hooks up a old sprinkler system into ends of it and runs the hose between them. You were right there next to him, eager to try it out.

"Like dis daddy!" You show him the drawing of a sprout of water coming out on either side.

"Mmm oh you want it there?"

"Mhm, daddy. Please."

It takes a few tries to get a passable stream of water but he felt pretty pleased with himself by the time the sun was fading in the sky.

"Can I try it daddy!"

"I don't want your nice clothes getting wet." Joel leads you back inside and changes you into one of his old shirts.

"What about you, daddy?" You look expectantly at your daddy.

"Oh dear I'm not sure I can make it down. I'm an old man, petal."

"Please daddy!" You hug him around the middle and give him your best puppy dog eyes. "Please daddy! I only wanna if you do it too!"

"Oh alright." Joel sighs, knowing his back would complain in the morning but he wanted to share this experience with you.

"I ready!" You signal him to turn the hose on. "Catch me daddy! catch me!" You give yourself a running start before pushing yourself onto your belly. you slid down the tarp way faster than you thoght you would. It was kinda like flying. You squeal as Joel catches you at the end.

"I gotcha!"

"That was so fun daddy!" You giggle. "I wanna go again!"

Joel lets you go a few more times before you are looking at him expectantly.

"Your turn daddy. I catch you. I catch you."

"Oh dear..." Joel chuckles. "You sure?"

"Mhm. You can do it daddy! You brave!"

"I'll try to be, baby girl." He strokes your wet hair before walking up to the start. There's a slight slope to the yard which helps. "Things you do for a girl, miller." He muttered to himself. He shucks off his tshirt and shoes. On the count of three he pushed himself onto the slide, traveling much faster than you. His legs slide out to the side which makes him laugh.

"Oof!" He stretches out a hand to stop himself and keep the full weight of his body from knocking you over.

"Yay daddy!!!" You were jumping up and down. "You were so fast!" You kneel down and flop on top of him.

"That was fun, huh?" He laughs.

"Ya." You kiss his collarbone. "I love this, daddy. Was every day like dis?"

"Yeah..." Joel hugged you close. "But it's better now that you're here."

The sun was staining the sky pink and orange and both of you watched it set.

"So... what are we gonna do tomorrow?"

Joel bursts out laughing.

~~~~~

daddy masterlist

[bytectrl]

𝚀𝚄𝙴𝚂𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚂 ↳↳    ACCEPTING    ( @loetise )

❛ you're so beautiful. ❜

for a moment orion seemed takenaback, stunned at her unsolicited praise, but his smile crawled across his lips and the tinge of red flourished in the apples of his cheeks as he laughed. bashfully, orion rubbed the back of his neck and looked up as if he couldn't quite handle looking at the earnest sincerity etched upon allie's face.

he knew he wasn't ugly, he also knew that his tattoos and body mods weren't exactly everyone's cup of tea, and he also knew that his desire to change his body, to cover himself in ink and sharpen his teeth was driven by the fact that he didn't like what he saw in the mirror. eyes and face and skin too european, too similar to his mother, too foreign from his father and his sister, wherever she might be.

orion met her gaze again, expression soft and affectionate as he leaned down so they were eye level. ❝ and you are the sweetest and prettiest person i've ever known, ❞

[bitchinbarzal]

anyway here’s the blurb:

“And Layla-“ Delilah was amidst screaming at Matthew for the run in she’d had with his ex girlfriend at the coffee shop down stairs from their apartment.

“Lyla” he mumbled.

Del paused, eyebrows furrowed “What?”

“Lyla, her names Lyla”

Delilah’s fists clenched by her sides for a moment and her nostrils flared.

It took two strides across the living room for her to be infront of Matthew, reaching up to slap him.

He looked takenaback, shocked at what she’d done “Del-“

“Don’t Matthew, what the fuck is wrong with you? I can’t-“ she shook her head softly “What the fuck? You don’t care she ambushed me downstairs, or the taunting but god forbid I say her name wrong- a name which shouldn’t mean anything to you!”

Matthew didn’t know what to say, mouth agape looking at her “Delilah I’m sorrry-“

“Me too, for thinking you were a good guy”

https://www.tumblr.com/bitchinbarzal/761525889263665152/im-going-through-a-bunch-of-inspiration-i-saved?source=share

Girl I'm ready to be hurt.... But also totally Del and Kniesy

Delilah would slap him I fear

Her southern belle heart says I don’t take no shit and would slap him

[the-interweebs]

annon: What’s vocaloid???

-

-

-

- kys

[flaynbestgirl]

its past 1am but all my brain can think about is how a few days ago when my flatmate made a broad sweeping statement thats actually quite harmful propaganda that he probably read on twitter or reddit or smth and i didnt say anything even though i should have

[ghostmasks]

more than a sick love story

more than a sick love story.. riddler x reader

                           TW: yandere themes, obsessive behavior

                     for better experience, please play the linked song.                       (i have not checked this for gramatical mistakes)

                                            CHAPTER 1 OF ???

“working on something?”

he jolts back, instinctively covering the gridded piece of paper he had been hunched over. his eyes are wide and his cheeks are flushed. he doesn’t talk, he just.. stares.

hes not ready to talk. not yet. what he’s working on, it’s huge. its big and he has plans that need elaborations. how long had you been watching him? odd.

he didnt respond, he just narrowed his eyes. theyre green. too green. maybe he didn’t hear you?

“are you working on something?” you elaborate, and he seems confused. he grips his hands around the ink pen tighter. tighter. phthalo. a nice shade of green, dark enough to match his features and yet bright enough to pop out.

like him. you can tell. he thinks people can’t see him. they do. he’s just visible enough to briefly notice, but not enough to make an impression.

he seems takenaback. who are you? where did you come from? he’s barely spoken to you for five seconds and his mind is already swarming with questions. he doesn’t want to answer, but he does.

“yes.” it’s brief. his voice is quiet, but not a mumble. hes clear when he speaks but lacks authority. you nod. you dont know what else to say. he’s been here for hours, unmoving except for his rushed writing of words. whatever he’s working on it’s clear he cares a lot.

“cool.” you praise, resting an elbow on the counter with your palm in hand. you’re bored and there are no other customers, or employees for that matter. it’s 10 minutes till closing and you were given the Night Shift with the job to lock up the cafe.

he stares some more. at you or through you, you couldn’t tell. there are no words spoken. you try to steal a glance at whatever he’s working on but it’s clear that upsets him because he slams him palms over the blue and white paper.

he looks angry and almost offended. just for a second; until the blank look of focus returns. what’s he focusing on. you? 

you held your hands up, not intending to bother him as much as you have; but you didn’t apologize. maybe you should of, but he was being much more hostile then necessary.

you look at the empty cup next to him, the inner rim stained with a brown liquid. some sort of coffee, you can tell. you weren’t the one to serve him originally; but he seems like a coffee guy. a cappuccino, maybe.

“refill?” you offer, and it’s innocent enough but still leaves him suspicious. he doesn’t answer, but then he does.

“if you could.” the corners of your mouth itch into a small smile and he furrows his brows together. he hadn’t seen you when he first entered the shop and he didn’t see you enter through the front doors either. a back entrance, perhaps?

he gingerly scoots the white and blue decorated cup a little closer to you so it’s easier to reach and you watch how soft yet firm his movements are.

he holds insecurities but he surely knows what he’s doing.

you grab the cup from him and your fingers briefly skim against one another’s. he jerks his hand back. what was that?

what was that?

(who are you?)

he wants to say something. you can tell. his lips are parted and he keeps stammering over nothing. it’s cute. he doesn’t talk to new people a lot. or anyone, really. he’s got that lonely vibe around him.

you speak for him as he racks his brain for something. anything. “ive never seen you before.” you point out. you like to try to remember all of the customers, does great for business. makes them feel special. he clears his throat, temporarily putting aside his work as he watches you from the bar stool he’s sat on almost the whole day.

“first time.” he simply answers, lacing his fingers with each other. trying to force his body language to seem relaxed. a nice idea, but something you’ve practiced one too many times to fall for.

“hope i dont make it your last.” you joke. a bad one, really, but it gets a simple smile out of him. his eyes crinkle and it seems genuine, but when he noticed he was smiling he immediately stopped.

he stops to think about it, and then he shrugs.

you shake your head, fighting a smile. “do i have to go to court to sort it out?” he wants to smile. you can tell. he doesn’t.

“perhaps. ill have the paperwork printed by tomorrow.” he goes on with the bit, clearly humoring you with it but you can tell he’s getting a smidge of his own amusement out of it.

“ah, so you will come back.” you smirk, and then he looks away. gaining his recomposure, probably. clearly he didnt expect such an accusation.

the silence is there again, for a moment, but this time there’s a bit of a lightness in the air. he quietly clears his throat before he turns back to look at you. and i mean really look at you. his eyes are narrowed and there’s almost a dangerous look in his eye. just for a second. anyone could’ve missed it if they weren’t watching close enough.

hes solving you, taking you apart and putting you back together again over and over. like a puzzle.

“i never said it would be me who brings you the paper work.” he finally speaks up again, clearly this conversation has thrown him for a loop with its oddness.

you pause for a moment, thinking of a comeback. “just the tiny calloused hands of the african children that work for you at minimum wadge?” you deadpan, beginning to stir the ingredients of his drink together. 

dark humor is a very special kind of humor that not everyone gets or likes. and when he widens his eyes, slightly puffing his cheeks out in reflex you wince internally; suddenly wishing you hadn’t of said anything.

that is until a funny sound could be heard. a laugh. a small, casual one. but still; a laugh. you look up at him and see the remainders of a smile on his face, his features have softened noticeably since first conversing with him and he pushes his clear rimmed glasses back up.

you add a tablespoon and a half of sugar to his drink and stirring it one last time before handing it back over to him.

you watch as he cautiously inspects the drink for a moment, turning his head slightly before slowly reaching a hand out to grab it.

he stares at it some more, and then at you, before lifting the cup up and hesitantly taking a drink.

when hes done, he pulls the cup back away from his parted lips and licks the wet residue. there’s a moment of anticipation before softly setting the drink back down. he knows what he’s doing.

“hmm,” he hums, and you finally break a smile, playfully rolling your eyes. by the time you meet gaze with him again, he seems genuinely hurt for a moment. but like a cogwheel in his head, something clicks and he’s smirking again.

“did you add sugar in this?” he questions, tilting his head just slightly down so that he’s looking up at you through his darkened eyelashes and you wish you could’ve done something to stop it but a cocoon of butterflies swarmed in your stomach.

“i did.” you confirmed, and he shakes his head.

“i dont drink my coffee with sugar.” he leans forward slightly, resting his arms on the counter.

“really?” you question, genuinely surprised. “you seem like the type of guy to do so.”

“guess im full of surprises.” he remarks. he stops for a moment before taking another swig of the drink; and then downing it all in one go. by the time he sets the cup down his brow is furrowed and a look of confusion is written all over his face with a hidden hint of annoyance.

“how did you know to make me a cappuccino?” he doesn’t look at you for a moment, his mind clearly processing the taste of the drink. (why does it taste so good?)

“guess im full of surprises.”

WHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOYWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOUWHOAREYOU

he smiles.

[yanderestevenuniverse]

As a sequel to "Precious Little Thing", what if Malachite went out and found her S/O's partner, brought them to Mask Island, and either killed or threatened to kill them to teach her S/O a lesson; considering they're probably still talking about leaving them, and going back to their partner after being on the island for so long?

tittle: lyers punishment

WHERE WAS IT!? franticly you looked all around the rock which you had hidden it could she have found it... no nno no nononononononNO you coudnt think like that she coudnt of found it r-right Y-yeah she coudnt of her finger were to big for the rock you just must have left it even deeper in the cave yes thats it you just had to act quickly before she gets b-

ohhh my precious little thing 

your eyes widend... she was back

you had to act fact 

quickly you started hobbleing as fast as you could desperatly trying to get back to the spot where she last left you. Your still healing leg wasnt helping after jumping over some rocks which landing nearly made you scream from pain you crashed back to where you think you were before... think?... oh no what if you where on that side on the cave or on that side w-what if she notices WHAT IF-

There you precious said malicate her voice sounded like two rocks being ground together. i wonderd where you i was scared id have to go all over the island looking for you again 

why would i do that mali(stars you hated how she made you call her that) i would never leave you i-i love you. you stated with th best forced smile you could muster 

malichite seemingly takenaback by these words she gave a sheepish smile y-you really mean that she said quickliy you responded with a quick nod( you swear that you could see her blushing

quickly a massive smile enveloped her face so wide that it threatend to break her face in two

oh my precious said malichite scooping you up into her hands you have no idea how long that ive been waiting for you to say that tears begining to form up in the corners of her eyes. closing them she said i *sniff* just have one question for you.

Yes you said nodding your head enthustticlly what is it mali

why are you lying to me

wh-what? her face one of pure joy just moments ago now turned to one off pure rage

Or better yet why’d I find this.

Raising one of her lower arms she unclenched to reaveal…

the color draind from your face untill it was gostly white it was the mirror

you know that i was- no the person who formed me was trapped in here for thousends of years said malichite her amber orbs burning into your soul you know this becuse i told you so why do you have it? your mind was raceing with thought thoughts of ecscuses ,thoughts of begging ,thoughts of fear. it was only a breif few seconds but it felt like an eternity but before you could answear you herd a wet thud on the cave floor.

dont worry said malichite with a slight hint of regret in her voice im not going to punish you not physicly anyway

slowly you peeked over the side of malllichites hand to see… no

hot salty tears rolled down your cheeks and sobs escaped your lips please oh please not them please not them please let this be a dream please please

i know you were still talking about leaving said malichite her eyes still borrowing into you but i cant have that darling no no no nooo after all

your my precious little thing

[controlkris]

send message;; “(yawning) good morni— oh its cold. what happened?”

the soul seems to shuffle around trying to get a better look at the surroundings

“oh right. can't see.”

suddenly, the soul seems like it got takenaback, suddenly aware of the current and past commands.

“what.”

“im sorry, but what? did you guys seriously— oh my god kris im so sorry i. (sigh) it seems like some of the ones here decided to make your life more miserable than needed again.”

“some of us are trying to get you out of this situation, we really are, okay? you'll find the save, you'll find food, i promise. we will do it. you will do it. even if it was forced upon you as a survival mechanic, you are strong and brave for putting up with all of this— puttin up with them.”

though the soul cannot be seen by kris, they seem to visibly be eyeing the other souls that have been putting in commands kris doesn't want.

"T-thanks." Kris chatters through their teeth, skidding to a stop and rushing off again. Their eyes search frantically.

"C'mon, c'mon..."

They can feel you giving the side eye.

"Yeah, kick the-their fuckin' ass for me." They say, then chuckle a little.

The song loops again, and they start bobbing their head to the tune, picking up the pace.

"I think... I see something!"

(Playing)

[sun-stormz]

Ok, so, after watching the part where Techno & Tommy run into Dream I get why People are worried about Techno betraying, And based on his tone of voice it can be seen two ways

1.) Hes testing dream, he knows Dream will not use it due to it being leverage. It indeed did sound very cocky and Testy and ive been in enough DnD Roleplay situations to recognize that Cockyness from 3 miles away.

2.) Its a threat, now i know that sounds weird but it just sounded like a threat, puting dream in a headlock of words. Cause if dream really wanted tommy gone he would have taken it, but he didnt. If it was due to him really having a dfferent use for it or if his Powerhungery ego didnt let him use it is up for debate.

Either way, the tone Techno had, it was way to cocky to be a simple ‘cash it in and ill give him to you’. Dreams reaction to Techno defending Tommy was something. It seemed a bit shocked and takenaback. He was rather quiet, came across like he was looking for words. 

Dream cant Intimidate Techno like he can everyone else, and now he cant really intimidate Tommy either.

Now, People are saying Techno is manipulating Tommy into hating Tubbo, but keep in mind, with Technos Standards when it comes to Friendships, tubbo is a horrible friend always standing by and then even exileng him. Techno doesnt know wht we as viewers know, he knows what he sees and what tommy has said.

Now, do i think Techno will betray tommy? No, cause it wont count as a betrayal. Techno has been rather upfront about how they are biussness partners, Yes i do think he is sofening up to tommy due to their shared trauma of betrayal, but When the time comes where Techno and tommy go against L’manburg i do think Tommy will betray Techno first by trying to protect tubbo, cause at the end of the day, he does still care about him, under all the grudges. I think that Tommy will get his disks or they will be destroyed but the conflict wont go away like he thinnks it will. it will remain beacuse the sorce is Dream being Powerhungry.

He will not help Techno Kill tuboo and destroy more of L’manburg and that will make Techno fell betrayed, again and probably loose it depending on where Philza is in all of this.

Keep in mind i have missed a good amount of Technos streams latley so this post might just be caned after watching those.

I think Dream will realize he needs better leverage over Techno, that Leverage being Philza, cause Tommy may be chaotic and such but at the end of the day Dream can easiely get rid of him, Techno protecting tommy? thats where problems start again. So what dream is most likley Planning: Get Techno out of the way and the Tommy is easy game.

Also i know everyone loves the SBi dynamics but i dont think that them being Family (i do think they are considering Techno is the only one that wont go by it and that sounds very in character for him) will keep them all together.

[moved-19871997]

Hii, okay so I'm mostly an sbi fan and recently I realized that I didn't follow any dteam blogs and I think y'all are pretty cool so I started following you and a few others and... so much has happened and none of the other blogs I follow are talking about it

For starters, I first read about mangoball's fic on a dteam blog. Then there's just, the dream bottom ask, gnf x reader secret blog, the gnfwhisper thing, apparently sapnap and punz held hands??? Karl sat on sapnaps lap??? Why is no one else talking about any of this??

Is it always this...eventful? Or has it just been a wild couple of days? I'm not complaining btw, I'm loving the vibes but there's just so much happening

the bottom ask was ciara crytodream’s anon who had everyone takenaback for a little bit, im positive the secret gnf x reader blog mcytblrconfession anon was a set up (its not me), sapnap and punz held hands on stream on. friday ? and karl sat in sapnap’s lap in like august and we r reminiscing. noone else is talking ab any of this bc i think thr rest of mcytblr dont really care ab the sex havers ? and dtblr is kinda small compared to mcytblr as a whole and not Every day is like this but i think today was fairly uneventful but everyones active and bored or procrastinating

[mallowstep]

(I came up with this au while in debate class so I'm calling it the Debate AU if you don't mind)

Tigerstar absolutely misread everything about Riverclan and fucked up so bad by keeping Stonefur, Mistyfoot Featherpaw, and Stormpaw alive and well and healthy but basically doing everything to Leopardstar that he does to Mistyfoot and Feathertail and Leopardstar in the Misty and Leopard AUs that Stone pulls a Scourge in front of all the clans and everyone looks at Stonefur in terror but Stonefur only has eyes for Leopardstar, who is leaning heavily on Mistyfoot. (Like Leopard is beat down, she's loosing hair, and she has deeply infected scratches on her shoulders.Stone and Misty fucking Hate Tigerstar for what he's done to this cat they've known all their lives.) Stonefur kicks Shadowclan the fuck out of Riverclan territory, Mistyfoot doesn't let Mudfur near Leopardstar (neither does Featherpaw, for that matter. She wasn't abused and she's healthy, but she was traumatized in-Tigerstar had her watch Mudfur abuse Leopardstar and Tigerstar himself told Featherpaw Greystripe thought the same things about her.) Featherpaw won't let any warriors in Leopardstar's den unless she's in there with Leopardstar ---so Featherpaw can protect Leopardstar. The silver furred apprentice curls around her leader, "I'm right here, Leopardstar. Stonefur and Mistyfoot are talking to the other clans and then they'll be back. Stonefur said he'd bring back your favorite." Featherpaw added, purring as she groomed Leopardstar's head. "Stormpaw said he went and got the best trinket for your new den though, and he thinks it's going to be your choice over uncle Stonefur's."

damn anon. thank you. hold on i'm going to engage.

also fair like. i'm. i'm out of the haze and not good at keeping track of au tags so. the only ones i'm really tagging for are the ones i'm like. still thinking about. stone au atm. just didn't want like. u to be. think it was a thing. i'm just tired 100% of the time. anyway.

cw: sexual assault, physical abuse, a few more detailed cws immediately under the cut

cws: parent being involved in sexual assault of child, child sexual abuse (via exposure)

cool. sometimes it's like. i dunno. anyway. sorry i said i'm tired but also very into this.

anyway /nm but also reminder to everyone that i have adhd and would prefer if you included paragraph breaks. obviously i just copy it into a document and add my own but. i appreciate when you save me the step. like i get it y'all've seen me ramble at Length in one paragraph before i just. appreciate it.

okay back on topic.

i'm going to sidestep riverclan related concerns for the sake of "angst good," lmao. riverclan related concerns being if i wasn't tired i could easily come up with a justification i'm just tired and lazy.

but like yeah like. uh. dammit i'm already opening up tpb books left and right. let me just.

"But common sense says there’ll be a battle, Firestar. I don’t need an omen from StarClan to tell me that."

oh my god can cinderpelt like. go and talk to all of the modern medicine cats so that they stop flipping out because starclan isn't answering their texts or whatever.

Remembering the wounded and devastated cats in the WindClan camp the day before, he had expected only a small group to come to Fourtrees. Instead practically every warrior must have been there.

i mean windclan has like five warriors but-

Firestar waved his tail to signal to the two united Clans—LionClan, he thought with a rush of pride. This was his destiny.

this is mostly for jace (assuming u see this) bc it's the whole "importance of lionclan existing" thing i was referring to. didn't bother to pull quotes on my dotc rant, but here u go.

so. point of canon divergence* is:

“Greetings, Tigerstar,” he meowed coolly. “You came, then. Not still looking for those prisoners you lost from RiverClan territory?” Tigerstar let out a snarl. “You’ll regret that day’s work, Firestar.” “Try and make me,” Firestar retorted.

* from firestar's pov

bc obviously that didn't happen.

no, what happens is firestar sees -- blackfoot and darkstripe and.

leopardstar.

firestar harbours no affection for riverclan's leader. but. even from a distance, he can see her ribs. he'd be surprised she was standing on her own, if he wasn't processing everything else going on.

he doesn't see this part.

Mistyfoot's tail flicks to Stonefur's shoulder, and he nods. They've only exchanged a few words, only had a brief moment, but they're ready.

Stonefur glances back. Featherpaw and Stormpaw are out of the way. He hopes, if this goes wrong, they have the sense to run. If they had the chance, he would have told them to skirt the edge of TigerClan and try to make it as deep into ThunderClan's territory as they could.

He hopes they have the sense to figure that out for themselves.

Firestar is exposing Tigerstar's plans. RiverClan doesn't react. There's not much they'd be surprised by, Stonefur muses. If Firestar told them Tigerstar killed his own kit, he doesn't think he'd be shocked.

Mistyfoot slips towards the front of the crowd. Leopardstar doesn't know, of course. Stonefur has barely had the chance to say two words to her in the past moon. He slinks around to the space between the Clans.

Firestar finishes his speech. No one says anything. Firestar looks takenaback. He glances towards Leopardstar; Stonefur does too. Mistyfoot is watching him, but she's looking at the ground.

A part of Stonefur wants to say, "That's not all." Because, as he starts to run, preparing to leap at Tigerstar, he wants them to know why. He wants them to know what Tigerstar has done. He wants them to revel in Tigerstar's death.

But he doesn't.

Tigerstar sees him, of course. Stonefur isn't trying to be subtle.

"You," Tigerstar growls.

Say it, Stonefur thinks. Tell them what you've done.

But Tigerstar doesn't.

The actual fight is a blur. He doesn't think he is himself again, until Tigerstar's corpse twitches and stills, and he looks towards Leopardstar. Mistyfoot has inserted herself between Leopardstar and Blackfoot, and Stonefur nods minutely.

It's over now.

the clans, of course, are...shocked. riverclan has no complaints, and while...everyone (more or less) is happy tigerstar is dead, but...for thunderclan and windclan, stonefur just murdered him without direct provocation. and the fact that he killed him nine times? direct violation of a warrior doesn't need to kill.

like. if they Knew, they would think stonefur just. but they don't know.

and riverclan doesn't want to explain and shadowclan doesn't want to explain and no i'm not at this moment figuring out what happens wrt bloodclan and so forth. i just wanted to set that scene.

yeah. no idea what happens next in a lot of places here. but.

everyone goes home.

("Your territory," Stonefur growls.

"Obviously," Blackfoot says.)

mistyfoot takes leopardstar to her den. stonefur tells stormpaw to run to thunderclan and ask for their medicine cat. tells him to say it's urgent and he can't explain here. tells him that if they want to send her with a warrior or two, don't argue. just get her here.

featherpaw stations herself outside leopardstar's den.

stonefur feels like he should say something. he's still covered in tigerstar's blood.

"we're taking this down," he says, "now."

they dismantle the bonehill.

once the process has been started, stonefur lets the rest of the warriors finish, and grooms himself and washes in the river until he's satisfied every trace of blood has been taken care of.

he's about to see her when stormpaw arrives with cinderpelt and...hm. sandstorm.

(cinderpelt was there. she saw leopardstar. she can start to put pieces together.)

stonefur greets them, and featherpaw goes to tell mistyfoot and leopardstar, and the adrenaline is fading, his limbs starting to tremble. when's the last time he got any real sleep?

"Stormpaw said you needed a medicine cat," Cinderpelt says.

"We do."

"Did something happen to Mudfur?"

"He can't do this." Stonefur's tail flicks. "We need someone to look at Leopardstar -- you can use our herbs, of course, whatever you need."

Cinderpelt blinks. She's a young cat, Stonefur thinks, too young to be looking at him like she understands. Maybe it's part of being a medicine cat.

"Right then. Does Leopardstar know I'm coming?"

"Featherpaw is telling her."

and stonefur isn't going to follow cinderpelt into leopardstar's den.

for one, it's crowded enough, and he'd probably just get kicked out. for another, he doesn't know what leopardstar and cinderpelt will talk about, but -- he doesn't want to force himself into it.

cinderpelt stays for a while. sandstorm runs proxy, taking some herbs to her, but then she stays with cinderpelt. stonefur has probably been up for over a day when cinderpelt and sandstorm nod.

"take some prey before you leave," he says. "riverclan won't forget this."

"i went over some things with mistyfoot," cinderpelt says. "always good to have some basic herb knowledge."

cats don't have a direct analogue for kissing, but stonefur could kiss cinderpelt for having the grace to say that without letting on why. it's not like riverclan doesn't know. everyone knows.

but.

it's still appreciated.

As the sun rises, Stonefur stands, facing into Leopardstar's den.

"Can I come in?"

Her eyes are watching him. Even they have been changed: no longer the brilliant gold he remembers, but something brassy and dull.

"Of course."

Featherpaw slips past him, taking his place as sentry. She needs to sleep, Stonefur thinks, but it might be best to wait until she's too exhausted to keep her eyes open. He's not above carrying her back to her den like a kit.

Leopardstar starts to stand.

"Don't," Stonefur says. "It's alright."

He hates that seeing her like this is not foreign to him.

Mistyfoot curls up, her eyes closed, a compromise. Stonefur sinks to the ground. "Can I -- do anything?"

Leopardstar looks at the empty space in her nest. "Would you stay with me?"

"Of course." (Anything.)

yeah. uh. i think like. i dunno. it's not like tigerstar ever showed leopardstar a single ounce of kindness. so. uh. am i using that as an excuse to sidestep angst? no. no i am not. well. not entirely. but Damn leopardstar needs a hug.

that she can initiate and control.

but still. she's desperately deprived of positive human contact and as someone who cried once because someone put their hand on my shoulder and i hadn't touched another human being in like six months. i think she needs it.

ohh boy yeah. i think y'all know me well enough to know where i'd go with that angle.

so let me turn my attention to featherpaw. i started answering this ask like an hour ago. anon i love you.

featherpaw has. uh. she's got a Lot of problems. as you can probably understand.

i'd say let's start at the top, but i'm not sure where that is, so let's start with her relationship to stormpaw, because i think that should get fucked up. i think...you know how stormpaw says, "i won't let him kill us"? and. yeah.

but there's never One Moment here and stormpaw realizes way too late and featherpaw feels like...you know like. everyone who is supposed to help her is failing her. she can't really blame leopardstar, and mistyfoot clearly feels bad, and stonefur like. idk what he was doing but she's solidly neutral on him.

could tigerstar try to fuck all of that up? of course he could. do i want to write featherpaw and stonefur arguing about leopardstar? i've already written a lot of something blindingly similar, so not at the moment.

anyway. the relationship i will freely fuck with is stormpaw. i think not because of anything specific, i think tigerstar just gets in her head and she looks like her mother (something tigerstar brings up) and stormpaw takes after their father and he keeps acting like everything is normal and.

at the end of the day, there's this gulf between them that he keeps stepping into.

so yeah. not to mention greystripe. like. fuck.

"Featherpaw!" Greystripe waves his tail at his daughter, and she flinches.

oh hey i hit the grammar cut off again. let me. i learned how to do this okay i'm going to insert some kind of dummy image or something to reset the counter.

there it's a link to my tumblr but i've got grammar checking again xd

moving on.

featherpaw doesn't want to talk to greystripe. it's not Strictly that she thinks what tigerstar said was true (although she's not sure it isn't), but that. just looking at him sets off a loop in her head.

uh. does anyone explain this to greystripe? no. because the cats who could are:

leopardstar (doesn't want to talk about it)

mudfur (doesn't want to talk about it)

mistyfoot (but only by inference, and doesn't consider explaining things to greystripe a priority)

featherpaw (doesn't want to talk about it and doesn't want to talk to greystripe)

so yeah. no. he's in the Dark.

one of the first priorities is building leopardstar a new den. and decorating it. that's part of building a den i just wanted to clarify and.

featherpaw takes it seriously. because. you know. beauty begets beauty.

she doesn't want...stormpaw is ready to jump straight into sharing a den with old apprentice friend dawnpaw. maybe they never stopped.

but featherpaw? doesn't feel safe there. (doesn't feel safe anywhere.)

especially as she's getting older and tigerstar certainly implied and-

she's not sleeping very well.

mistyfoot and stonefur are trying to help her but they're not therapists! they don't know what to do! featherpaw clearly is dealing with shit but how do they help her??? they have no idea!!! how would they?

in a very strange inverse of canon, leopardstar and featherpaw develop a close relationship. leopardstar feels like she failed to protect featherpaw. featherpaw just. doesn't know. she doesn't know what she feels or thinks or knows and like: leopardstar doesn't. she doesn't need to explain herself to leopardstar.

she's in a big sister role to the kits, i think.

uh. yeah. featherpaw. she is not taking any of this well.

sooner or later greystripe corners her (because he doesn't know) and she's having a panic attack and leopardstar is like "you are never allowed to talk to her ever again" and greystripe is like "what the fuck did i do" and someone (mistyfoot?) finally explains.

uh. what else.

stonefur + leopardstar + featherpaw cuddle pile? leopardstar is in the centre. she feels kind of weird about that because she can tell featherpaw is like. going through this whole. uh. whats the. fuck.

like. featherpaw feels like she needs to protect her and leopardstar doesn't really want to encourage that but on the otherhand it's kind of nice that featherpaw is right here because tigerstar 100% used to threaten her to leopardstar and-

yeah.

uh.

i started writing two hours ago so i'm just going to post.

[aint-no-odriscoll]

(From the Mary-Beth letter anon!) A bit of a flushed Mary-Beth walked over to the stable boy, her hands folded neatly "Kieran? Er- did you happen to get my note? I'm sorry if it was too forward." Poor girl forgot he cant read

Kieran startles a little when he hears her voice. He quickly turns around from what he was doing to face her, a little takenaback before he smiles nervously, "Oh- uh yes, I-I did get yer note. Uhm. I believe so, anyway. But uh- I ain't uh- a very good reader..." Kieran admits, pulling the neatly folded note from his pocket and gesturing to it vaguely, "It uh- I'm sure it weren't forward, miss. Someone told me you uh- invited me?"

[alto-march-of-death]

I'm not used to feeling this way. Thank you, though. Although I'm sure that you’re cuter, and sweeter than the chocolates. Have I mentioned that already? If I did I apologize, I’m a little takenaback by your forwardness. Not that that's a bad thing! Just unexpected.

putting under a read more because I’m embarrassed

You haven’t mentioned that, no. I giggle a moment before turning serious. If I’m... if I’m being too forward, I can tone it down. I’m sorry to have flustered you. I just get very excited around you, I think.

[26shadesofgreen-blog]

Another week comes to an end - a fantastic week at that! But I'm ready for the weekend! . . #readyfortheweekend #tgif #tgiff #thanksgodisfriday #sunset #beautifulcolors #ig_color #ig_countryside #lookatthat #beautiful #takenaback #sunsetlovers #lovesunsets #endoftheweak

[aseasyaspie2017-blog]

#aseasyaspie #englishlearning #englishphrases #takenaback Here is the next... Taken aback - > surprised