#take it as it is this took way too long to write fsdlkjdsf

[vypcr]

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐍 𝐕𝐄𝐆𝐀𝐒

          IT STARTS WITH A TEXT.  A concerned brother checking in on his sister. A week of hell has come and gone, and things have reached a lull. Maybe everything will calm down now. Hawk can take the time to recover from the brutal injuries he suffered at the hands of Cobra Kai. Tory gets to escape for the weekend with her boyfriend, no stress or obligations. But of course, no one here can catch a fucking break, and Tory is once again reminded of the snake that has sunken his fangs into Robby. Hanging there, attached to his limb.  Filling him with poison . 

          She can’t watch this happen to him anymore. 

           ❝ I need a break. ❞

          Just like that, plans have changed, and she’s broken her own heart in two. She feels like running. Far, far away. As far as her feet can take her. But she can’t. There’s too much going on. Too many problems to fix. Hawk was brutalized by her fellow Cobra Kai members. They tried to steal from Silver, and now he’s used that to leash her to the dojo. Laura had her arm broken, and Tory was so caught up in her own shit that Sam knew before she did. Duncan told her that she brought this on herself, that she was supporting Silver by refusing to leave. Sam hates her because she found out about the tournament and thinks she was involved. She even snapped on Peter, one of the sweetest people in the world, because he was trying to help her.  ( How do you fix things when each fuck-up follows in close succession? )

          Her phone lights up. Hawk. She wasn’t going to tell him about what happened, but he asks, and it pours from her. Bitter, angry emotions squeezed into the text box on her phone.  ( Too much. It’s all too much. )  And Hawk, the good brother he is, offers her an escape. Drive away.  Drop everything and go to Vegas for a while .  She sits on the offer all night, but the next day everything still feels like a fresh wound, raw on the inside of her chest, and she decides it’s time to go. No warning to her mother, or Laura, or anyone else. One more minute here and she might explode. Thumbs rush along her phone’s keyboard.

          [ 𝚃𝙾𝚇𝙸𝙲𝙸𝚃𝙰 :]  𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐?

          [ 𝙲𝙰𝚆 𝙲𝙰𝚆 :] 𝙸 𝚍𝚞𝚗𝚗𝚘. 𝙻𝚎𝚝'𝚜 𝚛𝚘𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚞𝚗𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚜. 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚠𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚗𝚎. 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎.

          [ 𝚃𝙾𝚇𝙸𝙲𝙸𝚃𝙰 :]  𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚒𝚏 𝙸 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔?

          The thought is sent before she’s had the chance to consider what she’s just said. But once it’s out there, the train of thought doesn’t stop. If she disappeared, would it really be so bad?

          [ 𝙲𝙰𝚆 𝙲𝙰𝚆 :] 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙸 𝚐𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚠𝚎'𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚞𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙽𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐.

          The mention of her adoptive mother, and she feels a sharp squeeze in her chest. Could she really do that to Nat? The fact that she was even considering it . . . maybe Nat deserves better than that. She’s only ever been good to her.

         [ 𝚃𝙾𝚇𝙸𝙲𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝚂𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚛𝚊𝚐 𝚖𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 ✌️

          And that’s that, she thinks. Tory’s made it clear where her head is at. Or she believes she has. But Hawk knows. He knows her impulsiveness. How she gets in moments like this. Knows that she needs to be talked down.

          [ 𝙲𝙰𝚆 𝙲𝙰𝚆 :] 𝙸 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚎𝚗𝚍 𝚞𝚙 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚂𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚣𝚎.

          Eyes read the name on the screen, and she sucks in a breath of air, like a shard of ice has just shot through her chest. Damn you, Hawk.

          [ 𝚃𝙾𝚇𝙸𝙲𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝙳𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚙𝚞𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚁𝚘𝚋𝚋𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝚘𝚗 𝚖𝚎.

          [ 𝙲𝙰𝚆 𝙲𝙰𝚆 :] 𝙸'𝚖 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚜𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐.

          [ 𝚃𝙾𝚇𝙸𝙲𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝙾𝚔𝚊𝚢 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎. 𝙼𝚊𝚢𝚋𝚎 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛. 𝙱𝚞𝚝 𝚊𝚝 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚊 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜.

          [ 𝙲𝙰𝚆 𝙲𝙰𝚆 :] 𝙰 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚎.

          They’re in Vegas by sundown that day. No one knows until they let it slip in the group chat between themselves and a few select family and friends. The ride there is pleasant. A good distraction. She’d forgotten how fun it was to spend time with Hawk, just the two of them.  ( Well . . . under non-criminal circumstances. )  God, she needed this so much, and she didn’t even realize it. They fight all the time, they get angry and say horrible things, but at the end of the day,  Hawk is here for her .  He drove her all the way to Vegas on less than a day’s notice just to give her some form of comfort for a few days. It reminds her why he’s her brother, and it sure as hell isn’t because of something like blood. Blood is too fragile a bond to describe what they share.

          Not much you can do in Vegas if you’re seventeen, though. At least not along the lines of what they want to do. But Walter Hawkman and Jolene Parton are legal adults. Their fake ID’s get them through a few doors, but it’s never long before some beefy guy in a black shirt comes to chase them out. ( Sorry, Louie. Your fakes aren’t as good as originally thought.) The last place is a bar. Thankfully no bouncers come for them this time, but that doesn’t mean they get away clean.

           ❝ Someone hit you with a car or were you born that way? ❞

          Spoken by some cackling guy with a lame hat, directed towards Hawk and his bruised appearance. Before Hawk has the chance to so much as roll his eyes, Tory’s already slammed her cinderella mocktail down on the bar, rising to her feet and stepping towards the other patron.

           ❝ The fuck did you just say to my brother !? ❞

           ❝ Your brother? Thought you were taking Quasimodo for a walk, there, babygirl- ❞

          The last word barely makes it from his mouth before Tory rips the hat from his head, cramming it between the guy’s jaws.  ❝ Banged up and he still looks better than you. You look like Sloth from The Goonies, you half-formed shithead. ❞ She leans in closer, practically growling as she kicks the barstool out from under him, sending him crashing to the ground.  ❝ And I’m not your fucking babygirl. ❞

          Maybe she should have paid attention to the insignia on his leather jacket. How it matched four more men in the room, who are now converging on her and Hawk’s location.  ( Shit. You did it again Tory. )  They fight them off well enough, and having a lot of movable objects in the environment helps. A pool stick, a few beer bottles, even the dartboard comes in handy. ( They’re badasses. Expect any different? ) But as they fight, she can hear Hawk wheeze and grunt in pain, even without taking many hits.

          He was already hurt, and she dragged him into another fight.

          A reach behind the bar, and she takes hold of one of the flexible beer taps, aiming it towards the bikers to use the spray as an distraction so they can escape. They disappear into the alley, and once they’re sure they’re not being followed, they decide that’s enough excitement for the night. It’s past midnight; time to find a hotel to crash at.

          Another hour is spent laughing, tending to Hawk’s injuries that were agitated by the bar fight, and reminiscing about their many escapades, both that night in Vegas and in the past. There’s still a cloud hanging over Tory’s head. A dark one that will not go away. But Hawk’s helped her hide from the rain. If only for a little while. He’s asleep by one. Understandable. Surely his body’s tired, and while Tory stuck with non-alcoholic drinks, Hawk indulged a bit. Fair. He deserves a good drink and relaxation. Tory’s already settled into bed, ready to sleep when her phone lights up. Eyes blink in confusion as she peers at it. She considers leaving it on the nightstand, unanswered. What could be so important this late at night? There’s hesitation, but she checks it anyway.

          And her heart nearly stops in her chest.

          Robby.

          [ 𝚂𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚉𝙴 💚 :] 𝚒 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚎

          [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚢 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝? 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚖𝚎??? 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚖𝚎. 𝚁𝚘𝚋𝚋𝚢 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚞𝚙???

          [ 𝚂𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚉𝙴 💚 :] 𝚒 𝚍𝚒𝚍 𝚒 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚞 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚞 𝚕𝚎𝚏𝚝

          From the first text, Tory knows something is off. Not that she expects Robby to be in a good headspace. They fought. She put their relationship on pause. She’s not okay, either. But this is different. It continues, and she tries to talk him down, but he’s so . . . unlike himself. Tory knows him well enough to know that  ❛ not okay ❜  is an understatement. She’s out of bed, pacing around the room before she realizes it. The last thing on her mind right now is the fight they had. It doesn’t matter if she said she needed a break. If he needed her, she would be there in a heartbeat. And he wouldn’t even have to ask her.

          [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝚁𝚘𝚋𝚋𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚔𝚊𝚢. 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐?

          [ 𝚂𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚉𝙴 💚 :] 𝙸'𝚖 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚎𝚎𝚎𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛. 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚜𝚒𝚕𝚟𝚎𝚛'𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚞𝚏𝚏.

          [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚍𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐???

          [ 𝚂𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚉𝙴 💚 :] 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚕

          There’s a rush of questions in her head. Is he alone? Is he home?

          Is he safe ?

          But she gets no answer, no matter how hard she tries to pry it from him. The only thing he offers her is the same answer she’s heard for months.  ( ❝ I’m fine. ❞ ) Now she’s half-dressed, without even thinking about it, changing out of her nightclothes and into a pair of jeans and a shirt. There’s no doubt in her mind. She has to go. She has to make sure he’s okay. If something happened to him while she wasn’t there, the day after they had that fight, she could never forgive herself.  ( If he got hurt, would it be her fault? )

         [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝙿𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚋𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎, 𝚘𝚛 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚋𝚎𝚛. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚑𝚞𝚛𝚝.

         [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚛 𝚖𝚎.

         [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚢 𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎

         [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝙸 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚏𝚎.

         [ 𝙱𝙰𝙱𝙴 ❤️ :] 𝚁𝚘𝚋𝚋𝚢

          She blows his phone up with messages, tries to call, but still no answer. There’s only one option now in her mind. Go home. Tory reaches for the keys, but the glimpse of pink hair on a pillow catches her eye and stops her in her tracks. Hawk’s still there, asleep in the other bed. What does she do? Does she wake him up? Tell him they need to get home immediately? She almost does, she even touches her fingertips to his shoulder, but then she pulls back.  How many times has she dragged him into her shit ?  How many times has he been put in harm’s way because of her? Just that night she had gotten him into another fight. She knows that if she did wake him up, he would come without hesitation. But he deserves his rest. He deserves at least one night free of her bullshit.  ❝ I can make it back in the morning, ❞ she resolves.  ❝ I’ll go home, make sure Robby’s okay, and then I’ll come back. ❞

          Maybe there’s part of her that already knows everything is about to go  wrong  again. Maybe that’s why she grabs the notepad on the nightstand and scribbles an  ❛ I’m sorry ❜ onto the front before she takes her keys and slips through the door. Her money, her clothes, everything she has is left behind with Hawk. Another way to convince herself that she’s coming back.

          She’s coming back. She can’t leave Hawk like that. She’ll come back.

          Two hours into her drive, one hour out from home, Tory has to stop. Pull over to the side of the road and get her mind to slow down. Her heart’s racing, and her head feels like she’s being spun on a carousel going a hundred miles an hour. Everything’s spinning.  ( God, she feels like she’s gonna vom. )  There’s too much silence. Too much worry. So, she texts Laura. Surely she can trust Laura to track Robby down and keep him safe until she gets there, right?

          [ 𝙻𝙰𝚄𝚁𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚖 𝚖𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚞𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚝𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚖𝚎.

          It hits her like a sack of bricks to the gut. Now Laura’s pissed at her too, and she can’t understand what she did wrong.

          [ 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙽 :] 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝙻𝚊𝚞𝚛𝚊

          [ 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙽 :] 𝙸𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎'𝚜 𝚊 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖, 𝚕𝚎𝚝'𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙸 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚑𝚘𝚖𝚎. 𝙹𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚜𝚊𝚏𝚎.

          [ 𝙻𝙰𝚄𝚁𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝙷𝚎'𝚜 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎. 𝙷𝚎'𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚖𝚎.

          [ 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙽 :] 𝚘𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚐𝚘𝚍. 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚐𝚞𝚢𝚜 𝚊𝚝?

          [ 𝙻𝙰𝚄𝚁𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 🤷‍♀️

          [ 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙽𝙰𝙲𝙷𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙽 :] 𝙻𝚊𝚞𝚛𝚊 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚒𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖?? 𝙸'𝚖 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚁𝙸𝙵𝙸𝙴𝙳 𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚗𝚘 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚛!

           [ 𝙻𝙰𝚄𝚁𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝙰 :] 𝙸 𝚜𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎. 𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚊 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖. 𝙸'𝚖 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚎.

          I’m fine. I’m fine. I’m fine.

          How many more times is she going to have to hear that tonight? In the next week? In the next month? How many more times is she going to reach for the people she cares about, only to have them slap her hand away?

          Maybe she deserves it. Maybe she’s the problem here. The connecting link between everything that’s happened is her, after all. She ignored Laura. She broke Robby’s heart. She got Hawk in another fight. She betrayed her mother’s trust. She lied to Sam. Why does it feel like every choice she makes is the wrong one? Like this is the universe’s sick way of paying her back karma for all the shit she did in the past. Things that she’s tried to make right, yet it all keeps coming back to haunt her. If she’s the common thread here, if she’s the problem . . .

          . . . maybe they’re all better off without her.

          Tory wipes the streams of water away from her eyes.  ( How long has she been crying? She didn’t notice. )  A hand reaches for the gear shift, but it shakes, unable to put it into drive. Thinking of Hawk .  Thinking about how she’s leaving him alone in Vegas.  ( She should go back. There’s still time. )  But if she did go back, then what? Another fight that she starts? More injuries to his already battered body? Does she tell him what happened tonight, risk riling him up and him potentially starting another fight with Robby? That’s the last thing she wants.  More fighting.  She needs to make sure he’s safe at the very least. She calls Mr. Larusso. Asks him to get Hawk home safely. The  most disappointing  moment comes when she lies to Daniel to hide her true intentions, saying she’s there, but she’s not. And she won’t be when he gets there. But she doesn’t matter in this equation. What matters is making sure Hawk gets home safe. That he doesn’t get dragged down with her and her bullshit anymore.

          She takes hold of the gear shift again, and this time she puts it into drive. It’s time to do what she does best, outside of causing trouble and fighting with everyone.

          Tory runs away.