#tags rb 🕺

[maiverie]

permanent taglist : @baekhyunstruly @lockburn-castle @glcwynini @usedto-me @ctrlemis @outrologist @hysgf @wccycc @chiyuv @gyuuberryy @maybee-may @viagumi @strwberrydinosaur @dimplewonie @raikea10 @tnyhees @ineedaherosavemeenow @solelyenha @moon-gyus @vexstrils @yoonights @quokkie @eulris @moonchildaera @haerinz @seosalad @reivrze @soonyoungblr @miyukisv @flwrshee @ctrlcntr

tr—has an edge : @luvhyun3

THE RAIN HAS AN EDGE ╰ ﹙ ☁️ ﹚ft. park sunghoon ﹕ a oneshot ﹙ preview ﹚

you are the girl with an umbrella on a rainy day, and sunghoon is the boy at the bus stop drenched from head to toe.

in a nutshell ﹒ there’s a heavy downpour so you hold an umbrella over sunghoon and he looks at you like you’re crazy // 100% fluff

word count ﹒ preview is 1.5k; full ver ~6-7k

fic one of the between the lines series ﹙ coming soon ! ﹚

“true, the sun and the wind inspire. but the rain has an edge. who, after all, dreams of dancing in the dust? or kissing in the bright sun?” — cynthia barnett

now playing ﹒ paris in the rain﹙ lauv ﹚

THE FIRST TIME you talk to park sunghoon, it’s raining, it’s cold, and jake had ditched you to “hang out” with chaewon, because he’s a crappy friend who pounces at any opportunity for female attention.

after your study session in the school library finishes, you find yourself standing at the school’s front entrance, grimacing at the downpour of rain in front of you. heavy pellets pummelled from the sky like bullets, forming puddles in the divots of the ground and lowering the temperature enough to make you shiver. 

lucky for you, you remembered to bring your umbrella.

this was a habit of yours even on the sunniest of days, after spending five days bedridden with a fever following The Great Downpour of 2020.

when you reached for your backpack and unfurled your umbrella, it sprung to life and off you went, hopping down the cement paveway that led to the nearest bus stop.

you’re just about to slip in your earphones when you stop in your tracks, spotting a figure a few steps ahead of you. 

the person is crouching on the ground at the bus stop, hunched over and hugging their bookbag in an attempt at gathering warmth. 

the person is drenched and miserable.

and practically radiating angst and despair.  

because you’ve always been a totally (impulsive) caring and selfless person, you shuffle over and hold your umbrella over the person’s head.

they look up — and just when you encounter a cold gaze, dark brows and raven hair — you realise that the moody figure is none other than park sunghoon.

park sunghoon, the ridiculously good-looking senior everybody whispers about but doesn’t actually know anything about. 

park sunghoon, the guy who always wears a stoic, unsmiling expression that makes him the most unapproachable of his group of friends. 

and park sunghoon, the one who’s staring at you with a baffled and slightly distrustful expression on his face. 

oh.

you’re just standing here, staring at him like a creep. 

crap.

you should say something.

you open and shut your mouth a few times, trying to brainstorm what you might possibly say. you want to sound smart. and funny. and cool. so, naturally, the first thing that comes out of your mouth is a very intelligent and super profound, “it’s, uh. . . raining.”

sunghoon continues to stare, his brows slightly furrowed to suggest he was questioning your sanity. 

“it’s raining,” you stupidly repeat louder, as though he hadn’t heard you over the rain. 

“good catch,” he replies, his gruff voice coinciding with the slight dip of his lips. 

the rumors are so true. 

sunghoon definitely has a very grumpy, rather angsty demeanour. you’ve actually spotted him around school a few times (you may or may not follow him with your eyes every time he’s around. is that a crime? it can’t be! you’re not the only one in the student body who finds him extremely attractive and painfully enigmatic), but he’s not the kind of person you can approach so easily.

in fact, he’s been coined the nickname ice prince for a reason.

“yes, uh,” you struggle to string together a coherent set of words, especially because he stands to his feet now, and you have to make the effort to not be intimidated by his height. 

“what i meant to say is that it’s raining but you don’t have an umbrella,” you laughed awkwardly, wanting to whack your head and yell stupid, stupid, stupid for impulsively waddling over here and saying stupid things to park sunghoon of all people. “i-i mean, obviously it’s a free country and you can totally do whatever you want, but, as you might already know — and i’m sure you do because you’re one of the smartest kids in school — standing in the rain can get you sick, like, really sick, and i only know this because about three years ago i forgot my umbrella and — funny story — i ended up getting so sick that i had to take five days off school because my fever was so high.”

oh god.

you quickly slap the tips of your fingers over your lips to physically restrain yourself from talking. the motion makes sunghoon’s gaze quickly flit to your lips, before they bounce back up to your eyes.

his stare is so painfully emotionless that you cringe inwardly.

you wish he’d say something.

anything. literally anything.

but he’s silent.

well, of course he is — you basically just trauma dumped about your stupid fever story. boo-hoo, you were sick from the rain — who cares?

just when you think you’ve reached the death of the conversation, you’re surprised by the sound of his soft voice.

“. . . niki.”

huh?

you blink, leaning in slightly so that you can hear him better.

“. . . niki. my brother. he took the last umbrella.”

oh.

your lips form a small o as you nod in understanding. “oh, niki! that doesn’t surprise me. he’s in my class, you know, and he’s always playing pranks on our teacher. one time he actually hid the test papers so we got a whole extra day to study,” your voice lowers to a whisper, “can’t believe i still failed it though. . .”

sunghoon doesn’t say anything, and afraid of being submerged in awkward silence again, you rush to fill in the space. 

“so where’s niki now?”

he shrugs. “soccer practice, probably.”

“oh,” you frown. “wait, aren’t you part of the soccer team, too? you’re the goalie. you saved so many goals last season and helped the team to their first win in two years,” you say, though your eyes widen in panic as soon the words leave your mouth, “n-not that i’m a stalker, or anything,” you frantically add, “it’s just that everyone knows you’re the goalie because one, it’s common knowledge, and two, the game is coming up and we’re all on the edge of our seats to find out how it goes!” 

stupid stupid stupid. 

why are you rambling so much? 

sunghoon doesn’t seem to mind, though his lips flatten in a rather sour manner. “i quit the team, actually.”

you gasp. “you’re the person jake is replacing? he’s been so cocky ever since it was announced that he’d be on the team. what made you quit?”

he shrugs, “it got boring,” he mumbles, then his ears turn slightly red and he dips his head in an emotion you never imagined park sunghoon could wear — embarrassment. “and i accidentally sprained my ankle.”

you blinked in surprise. “how?”

he hesitates before answering. “i tripped.” 

you stifle a laugh at the irony, because while sunghoon was a lot of adjectives — tall, handsome, mysterious, brooding, kind of scary, even — you never thought he was clumsy.

you softly cackle, earning you a glare from the boy. 

“sorry,” you grin playfully, growing accustomed to his icy aura. “i just never pictured you as a klutz.”

“says you,” he grumbles, “weren’t you the one who tripped and fell in the cafeteria last week? ”

“what—” you choked, “you saw that?”

he exhaled through his nose in amusement. “who didn’t?” sunghoon raised a brow at you. “i’m pretty sure someone recorded and posted it. the caption was ‘dumbass fails to do simple task and ends up with food all over her clothes.’”

your eyes slammed shut before they shot open. “fucking jake,” you growled, gripping the umbrella tightly. “i’m going to kill him.”

sunghoon chuckled, and the sound made your heart beat a little faster. you caught a fleeting glimpse of his smile which — by the way — showcased the most emotion you had ever seen from the boy. it couldn’t be helped that your stomach mangled and twisted at his pearly-white boyish smile, one that made his cheeks bunch up his face and his eyes twinkle like stars.

how pretty.

his smile faded as quickly as it appeared, however, and you soon found yourself facing his usual blank expression again. 

you want to try say something that might make him smile or laugh again, but he suddenly steps outside of the cage of your umbrella and raises his hand, hailing down the incoming bus. 

it slowly stops by the road beside the two of you, marking the end of your little interaction. 

“oh, your bus is here,” you force a smile, rather disappointed. “i’ll, um, see you later, sunghoon.”

“get home safe,” he retrieves his bus card from his pocket, glancing over his shoulder before he boards his bus. “and thanks. for the umbrella.” 

“n-no problem!” you quickly smile, “and by the way, my name is—”

“i know your name,” he interjects, and you think your mind is playing tricks on you when you see the edges of his lips twitch upward. “see you around.” 

sunghoon disappears into the bus and it whizzes by you, though you stay frozen in your feet for what feels like forever. 

he knows your name.

he’ll see you around.

you tuck your lip between your teeth, cheeks and ears flaring up.

get home safe.

if that’s what he truly wants, then yes — you think you can manage that.

( to be continued )

this is a preview only ﹒ full fic is estimated 6-7k ﹒ taglist open — send an ask, dm, or reply !

a/n . btw this is a preview only. the full fic might come out next week ? anyway my first hoonie fic and it's 100% pure, unadulterated fluff <3 this is inspired by paris in the rain + the above quote + an exo fic i adore ^^ hope u all liked it :) see u in the full version maybe ? 🤓

[devondespresso]

Hi, I was wondering if there was a masterlist or an easier way to read the Steve Henderson au in order? I caught some glimpses of it, but I’m struggling to find the whole thing.

thanks for the ask slay!! 🕺

so short answer is that i don't have any full chapters out yet but a bunch of snippets(mostly in wip weekend/wednesdays) and rambles are out there under #devon's steve henderson au

basically any post relevant to this fic is there. i think the wip Wednesday/weekend snippets are in order for the most part and canon compliant for season 2 so they usually have an aside context for where in that timeline they sit. but i don't have any set masterlist in perfect chronological order because they are just snippets from the wip.

(i think theres also "steve henderson au rambles" but they're both used basically the same i think. i just made it originally because for some reason i was scared to make up my own tag with my name in it?? idk anxiety be wild)(i think i might've also posted about it before making the tag? i can try and find any interesting old ones and rb them with the tag)

longer answer is that my steve henderson au is not like officially posted yet, its going to be a long fic that (fingers crossed) will cover from s2 through s4. i probably won't wait until the whole things done before posting but with the way I'm writing theres a ton of jumping around and tweaking and editing so I'm not yet comfortable posting chapters because of how often im going in and changing things. im kinda figuring out my writing process as i go y'know.

i promise that what i have written will get posted eventually, ideally it'll be because I've gotten far enough that I've stopped editing my first chapters. but even if i magically wake up tomorrow never wanting to type another word again I'll still make sure to post what i have, especially since i talk about it a lot on here lol. So far its about 50k words so we're going strong and im still really enjoying making this bad boy 💪

[normiematsu]

next picture day some suggestions thrown out were azumanga daioh... idolmaster... love live... bandori.... if u have anything that would be fun and funny to redraw rb w a pic so i can organize them into a tag 🕺

[likelyscam]

Heyyyy mutual! Here’s ur anon saying what i think of u. Dndads mutuals r all friend material imo. Love seeing others being just as insane abt it as me. I also rly enjoy reading ur tags when u rb stuff 🕺

hehehe thank youuu<3 i’m REALLY glad you enjoy my tags lolol AND YEA: the dndaddies fandom has some weird form of bond that anyone else can only dream to achieve! we’re all just as weird,,

[malvosia]

ok i made a chainsaw man sideblog where i can rb spoiler art if anyone wants to follow it’s @8thfloordevil​ 🕺 i’ll still be rbing csm here (and tagging accordingly) but i wanted a corner to rb spoiler-y content freely 

[fic-dumpster]

T A G S

The purpose of a tagging system besides order is to block them if any content causes you discomfort. Or follow them instead of the whole acc xD. (Just saying 💕😂)

How to block tags on mobile?

Can be searched on internal tags or the wide search tab

Anon tags

Pemis, 🦕, 🍭, 🕺, 🧟‍♀️, 🎤, 🍓, 🍑, 👺, 🍒, qx, 💜, ☺︎︎anon☺︎︎, 🍄, 🦊, ~(•‿•), 🍎

General blog tags

#omificstags | all my writings from all fandoms from all my blogs.

#omi.sefship

#omi.Homicipher | all post related to the game Homicipher

#omi.shitpost | my peculiar sense of humor, incorrect quotes, jokes, hcs, chats, humor in general

#omi.thirst | you can block this tag if you don't want to interact with any sm*t fics.

#omi.rambles | yk talks, rants and everything in this tag will probably be deleted later.

#omi.rb! | reblogs

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#omificstags | all my fics from all my blogs and fandoms in one tag.

#omi.recs.fics | fics reblog recommendation on main

#omi.updates | updates about fic, me and the blog in general.

#Omi.DIH | everything related to my Deer in headlights series can be found here. Chap hcs asks

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#omi.art | art/fanart that I do/rb/gets submitted.

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#omi.music | sometimes I rb songs

#omi.heroes | DC/Marvel stuff

#omi.kpop | kpop related posts block if you want

#omi.purple.aesthetic | icons and purple pictures

[strxnged]

elek’s tags (for organizational purposes 😤)

general tags

shitposts + random announcements : #elk’s trash

headcanons : #elk’s headcanons

self explanatory 🥑: guac!moments

asks : #elk’s asks , #requests! 💕

anons : #anon! 💕 , #anon:[emoji] (e.g. anon:🥖, anon:🌧)

moot tags : #wife ☝ (@/kailleis-sunshine), #val 🐍 (@/h-grangerstudies), #elle 🌻 (@/snoozless), #vale 🧸 (@/iwasumi), #leafy 🍃 (@/tsumussweetheart), #chloe 💕 (@/nepenthendline), #hana 🤏🏽 (@/daddyjackfrost), #momo 🔅 (@/tobi-momo), #nadia 😍 (@/nadisabug), #serenity 🥶 (@/serenitycushing), #isa 🎼 (@/dearkousei), #ellie 😩 (@/kirishimas-manly-eyeliner), #angie 🍉 (@/pxnkvelvet), #jennie 🌷 (@/lilies-and-rosies), #ko 🦋 (@/kobunnies), #zumi 🍮 (@/kozu-zumi), #🚗🚪💕 (@/howdyfriend),  #moon 🌊🔪 (@/stuckonkpop) #niner 👩‍👩‍👧 (@/minadreams), #angel ☁ (@/soft-angel-clouds), #astrid 🐇 (@/astrqmi), #kohi 👓 (@/kohi-zeri), #keishy 🕺 (@/uniquabackyardigans), #cel 📜 (@/haikyuutothetop), #jazzie 🍪 (@/jazz-speaks), #delylah 😻 (@/shxyo-sho), #blue 🦕 (@/bluefaeriefury), #bella 🌙 (@/megumisbimbo), #marissa 😔 (@/marissawrld), #lia 🐎 (@/ereeen-jeaageeer), #angie 🍡 (@/macaroooniies), #duckie 🍓 (@/boba-duckie)

^ let me know if I missed you! and if you don’t have a tag yet, pick an emoji to go with your name and tell me!

selfship tags (yes I have like 6 selfships it is what it is)

(tanaka x elek) : #eleknosuke

(asahi x elek) : #azusonix

(kuroo x elek) : #elekuroo

(oikawa x elek) : #elkawa

(sugawara x elek) : #sugasonix

(akaashi x elek) : #elekeiji

fic recommendation tags

152 event picks : #elek’s 152 recs

comfort fics : #[🌙] recs

actually sobbing atm fics : #[📦] recs

platonic fics : #[🥺] recs

this fic is a masterpiece : #[👑] recs

self rbs: #[🤠] reblogs

friend/moot rbs : #[😎] recs , #[😎] reblogs

[misfits1a]

main blog tags

yours truly — xx ━━ original posts by yours truly

ky writes ━━ for when i decide to post some bs i wrote (i don’t post my writings on this blog anymore!! i created a new blog for writing!)

let’s be misfits 🤫 ━━ when i answer and post stuff from my inbox

it’s my blog & i’ll queue if i want to (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ ━━ queue tag

ky’s in love ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ❤️ ━━ fave characters / lomls

writing tags

ky writes ━━ for when i decide to post some bs i wrote (i don’t post my writings on this blog anymore!! i created a new blog for writing!)

masterlist. media name ━━ find all my masterlists. ⤷ ex. masterlist. 9 1 1; masterlist. julie and the phantoms; et cetera

masterlist. character name ━━ for a specific character masterlist ⤷ex. masterlist. evan buckley; masterlist. reggie peters; et cetera

other tags to know

me irl ━━ for when i reblog memes or posts, et cetera, that perfectly encompass me and my personality

tw … ━━ when a possible trigger is mentioned / possible trigger warnings (if you need anything tagged pls don’t hesitate to lmk); i always put any and all possible warnings / triggers at the beginning of my fics so if you’re here for reading, pay attention to the text before the gif !! ⤷ex. tw horror movie; tw puppets. check this post for full ref of all my tw tags to block what you have to!)

whomst? 🫣 ━━ when anons pop up in my inbox

ships 🛳️ ࿐ྂ ━━ my ships

insert [ . . . ] ━━ find any posts / reblogs pertaining to a show, movie, character, ship etc. ⤷ex. stranger things; legally blonde; reggie peters; sharpwin

brain stuff 🧠 / body stuff 🩻 ━━ when posting / reblogging anything related to mental illness or chronic pain

the bestie(s) . 💃🕺 ━━ when talking about my friends (see next tag)

[name] ━━ for when my friends show up in my inbox or i reblog and respond to something they posted

hobby / fandom specific tags

i also tag spoilers for (popular / hyped up) movies / tv shows i watch. check my fandoms page for a definitive list of shows i watch. i tag marvel movie spoilers (movie title included, i.e. “avengers endgame spoilers”), stranger things spoilers, etc. what i frequently rb and will tag spoilers for is italicized

simp tags🥰😗

ky’s in love ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ❤️ ━━ fave characters / lomls

🥵 it’s the quenchiest 🥵 ━━ me, on my thirsting bs

me: *commits a crime and pleads not guilty* the prosecution: *shows these pics* me: I DID IT YOUR HONOUR ━━ literally what it says 😭

i need him biblically / i need him in a way that is concerning to feminism ━━ they’re two separate tags but they have to go together mhm. it means exactly what it says

i can take him ━━ 😗🎶😗🎶

[maiverie]

permanent taglist: @baekhyunstruly @lockburn-castle @glcwynini @flwrshee @usedto-me @soonyoungblr @ctrlemis @outrologist @hysgf @wccycc @chiyuv @gyuuberryy @maybee-may @viagumi @strwberrydinosaur @miyukisv @dimplewonie @raikea10 @tnyhees @ineedaherosavemeenow @solelyenha @moon-gyus @hazyyu

BITE BY BITE — a lee heeseung series; masterlist.

in which you’re a vampire, and heeseung teaches you how he likes to be bitten.

SYNOPSIS. lee heeseung has one reputation, and it’s that he’s not afraid of anything: of rules, of authority, and especially not of vampires. he’s obviously bad news, and for such reasons, you’ve always made sure to never cross paths with him. however, it isn’t until one fateful night that you catch his eye and what he tells you next makes your entire world flip on its axis.

“i was thinking you'd never come around, fangs. bite me. just like last time.”

PAIRING. college playboy!heeseung x vampire fem!reader

GENRES. romance, (modern) fantasy, slight action

WARNINGS. swearing; descriptions of blood and violence; descriptively suggestive scenes (nil nsfw); heeseung is kind of a dick / overly flirtatious at times / slightly toxic (sorry I'm kinda into that) and yn is very timid to begin but I promise I'm a fan of character development

A/N. my bite me inspired fic HEHE I'm still streaming the shit out of that title saur </3... anyways I'm actually so excited for this because biteme!heeseung is making me spiral LMAAOO this series is lowkey just a thirst trap sorry :") hope u guys like this,, so much planned for it hehe. buckle urself in for a ride. . . >:)

MASTERLIST.

⋆┈ bite I: ⋆┈ bite II: ⋆┈ bite III: ⋆┈ bite IV: ⋆┈ bite V:

SPOTIFY PLAYLIST!

╰┈➤ MY OTHER STORIES :)

[maiverie]

TAGLIST 2: @lovnayeon @tobiosbbyghorl @pocketwonton @beomkj @hysique @doqie @cruelfever @roshiandia @woniesluv @fiantomartell @moonchildaera @yeongwonie @h4nnnnnnnj @cloudykyu @sunkitsch @raeinchu @axartia @iwuvjay @love-4-keum @jeongyeon27 @hydroqenbreaths @mika-t3t @enhacolor @ineedaherosavemeenow @jjayeongi @jungwonize @yurazuyori @butterfly-ningg @itzyfeet @2bbang-hoon @skyvwonie @vmpnoo @xcherrybbyx @dreamenvi @wwjlln7 @glamchan @byjwn @dimplewonie @gyuuberryy @loves0ft @raikea10 @ggisbbq @luvishee @person-standing @kissomen @yunhowooyo @tomorrowbymoa-together @shinsou-rii @ssunnk @saucytaehyung @koakyuu @yannnnaj @sunswoonie @ditzy-e @enhas-bestie @hee-in @cyuuupid @solxrssun @hyuckishere @soobisms @svnoofy @heeseungging @nyanggk @my5colors @sseastar-main @ohnle

TRIAGE! ┊ a lee heeseung series — FINALE ♡

you try to teach the nerd how to date.

synopsis: heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.

given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"

MASTERLIST HERE !

kayla’s playlist (@/miiiwaa) ♡ my shitty og playlist . tags : #.*triage .

TAGLIST

@enhyflirt @dreamyenskz @icedcoffeesunwoo @ssolari @skazoo @jjunis @heejake-en @koroktsuya @jeongwins @tinykoi-s @en-boyz @soobin-chois @blessed-sky @jhyunieee @kisswon @vbxrin @cosmicsunghoon @bloomedberry @jungwonielove @miiiwaa @jungwoniee @lhsng @missharubear @deonuism @sarahxy537 @bambisgirl @hrrhmay-primaryblog @yeonzzun @msxflower @sunsunu @jangwonie @sweetjaemss @seungstarss @tokyoflies @solelyenha @softforqiankun @goodforgyu @va1ry @taekbokki @ashxxkook @moon-gyus @jakeified @markleeisdabestdrug @wccycc @viagumi @pisss111 @outrologist @fairfairee @hiqhkey @ctrlemis

chapter five (finale)

word count: 8k | navigation: previous / MASTERLIST warnings: swearing, (verbal) bullying a/n: final chapter; thank you so much for reading this far. sorry this took so long to get to you :(

‎‎‏‏‎ ‎

‘let’s have a little talk, you dweeb.’

heeseung had been backed into a corner.

while he often liked to reserve that idiom for metaphoric effect, he means it quite literally — ryujin and taehyun had literally backed him into a corner of a bedroom with no way out.

it was obvious he had stumbled across something he shouldn’t have. 

ryujin and taehyun kissing? how disturbing.

if it were up to him, he truly wouldn’t have meddled in their business. however, the way they’re sneering at him leads him to believe that they think his actions were intentional. he wants to insist that no part of this was deliberate—that he was honestly just trying to find you—but tense silence circulates the trio and he has no inclination to speak first.

“who the fuck do you think you are?” ryujin punctuates the silence with her malice, making him inwardly wince. her hands find their way to her hips as she openly scowls with disdain. “god, you’re annoying.” 

“i-i should go,” heeseung lowers his head, scratching the nape of his neck. “i didn’t mean to intrude,” he laughs nervously in an attempt to dispel their hostility, “i was just trying to find—”

“no, you should stay.” taehyun suggests, a smirk slithering to his lips. he rolls his head around his neck before sighing contently. “you should stay and play with us.” 

play…?

heeseung physically recoils with horror, stomach twisting with unease. there’s something about taehyun’s predatory stare that flares goosebumps all the way across his arms. he realises that the most wise decision right now is to escape the enclosed space as soon as possible. 

“sorry, i-i don’t want to keep my parents waiting,” he lies, lowering his head. “they’re downstairs.”

the two exchange impish glances.

“well, we won’t be long,” ryujin stifles a laugh before taking a seat on the bed. she folds one leg over the other, leaning back with her arms propped up. “since you were creeping on us, we thought you could exchange the favour and tell us all about your girlfriend.”

“girlfriend?” heeseung blinks. he doesn’t have a girlfr— oh.

miss sunset.

you? his… girlfriend?

as if.

“oh,” heeseung dips his head shyly. “n-no, you’re mistaken. she’s, um… she’s not my girlfriend.”

if he were being honest, he was kind of hoping to change that some day.

“what, so you guys haven’t fucked yet?” ryujin bats her lashes, a playful stare in her eyes.

heeseung’s brows instantly furrow, a frown on his lips. frankly, he was a little bugged by their vulgarity and the tone used to address you. this was the same type of contempt he noticed in other people in his life — like his aunt at her wedding, who pulled him aside and cautioned that ‘girls like that are foxes, heeseung! they’re nothing but trouble.’

it shouldn't matter, because they’re all wrong.

every single one of them. 

they're wrong.

it boggles his mind that people can’t see what he sees.

then again, it can’t be helped that all the best things about you are what can’t be seen. sure, you’re so pretty that sometimes he can’t even meet your eyes properly, but you’re also warmer and kinder than you give yourself credit to be. you must not realise, but he notices the little things you do for him — like the way you clean his glasses when he places them down on the table to sleep; or the way you pretend you’re full so he can finish the rest of your lunch; or the way you scribble encouraging little notes and drawings on his textbooks when you know he has a long night of studying ahead of him. 

it boggles his mind that some people may never have the privilege of peeking behind the curtain to see that you’re warm, and funny, and kind, and caring. you embody everything that his well-fitting nickname suggests. miss sunset — a blaze of colour; an explosion of soft yellows, bright oranges, fierce reds, pearly pinks and vibrant purples. 

you’re a fiery kiss to the sky.

it’s both a shame and an honour that he’s able to keep you to himself. 

“you know she likes you, right?” ryujin smirks, erecting from the bed.

heeseung’s eyes instantly round. “wh-what?”

“yeah,” she slowly slinks toward him. “she told me.”

“r-really?”

“duh. why wouldn’t she? we’re best friends,” ryujin scoffs, arms folded. “and i know her better than anyone. we’ve known each other since we were little kids, you know.” 

heeseung notices that you don’t often talk about your relationship with ryujin and taehyun. you don’t really tell heeseung much about anything from your past, but he would certainly consider your old friendships to be the biggest elephant in the room. he doesn’t doubt that you were all once close friends, but he knows you haven’t been in contact with them for a while now. it’s obvious why, in his opinion — they’re mean-spirited people who enjoy sinking their claws into people and injecting poison.

they’re callous and vicious and hateful. they’re everything that you’re not. 

‘best friends’? he felt insulted for you.

it was like trying to hold a candle to the sun.

“what… what was she like?” heeseung can’t help but ask, his stomach doing a little flip at the thought of you as a child. he knows he should probably leave the room, but the temptation runs too deep — he wants to consume everything about you.

what did your hair look like? what did your laugh sound like? did you prefer playing outside or staying inside? what made you smile during the day and what kept you up at night?

his heart began to thump at the thought of these answers before reluctance settled in.

was it wrong to wonder these many things about you? 

was he allowed to be curious? 

would that truly be okay — given that you were a goddess and he was next to nothing?

“cute,” ryujin replies, head bobbing. “she was cute.” 

aha!

heeseung can’t help but smile profusely. “of course! i knew it,” he mumbles, blushing to himself. of course she was cute; beauty like that must have been obvious even at a young age.

ryujin’s razor-sharp stare remained. she seemed to study heeseung carefully before lowering her gaze. “she was also kind of mean, i guess,” she continued, inspecting her nails nonchalantly. “a bit of a bully.”

taehyun stifled a laugh at this, and they exchanged knowing glances as though they were indulging in an inside joke. “oh, yeah, i remember she once bullied that kid for sitting in her seat.”

bullied?

heeseung frowned, doubtful about their claims. he reminds himself that they’re both the type of people to embellish any story for their own entertainment. “you’re wrong,” he frowns. “she wouldn’t do something like that. sh-she’s not like you. she’s different.”

ryujin’s lips extend into a smile. “how well do you think you know her?”

his frown deepened. “better than you do.” 

the pair instantly burst into cacophonous laughter that seems to poison the air in the room. 

heeseung bites his bottom lip, feeling unease swirling around at the pit of his stomach. 

“really?” ryujin defies him with a raised brow. “you really think you know her that well?”

he nods slowly.

“okay,” she tilts her head, “then where is she right now?”

heeseung’s eyes flicker to the ground. he didn’t know the answer to that question, but that wasn’t indicative of anything. “well, i-i don’t know, but… she’ll be back—”

“obviously, she ditched you. she left you, heeseung, it’s something we used to do a lot. we’d invite two or three suckers to a party, get them drunk as shit, and then make them entertain us for the next few hours.” 

his eyes widened as he fell into momentary silence, forming as many rational justifications as he could. “but… i was the one who asked her to come with me. and… and you just told me that she… she likes me.”

ryujin rolled her eyes. “the only reason yuna invited you was because we thought it’d be funny. plus, don’t get me wrong — i’m sure she likes you, but don’t put any weight on that. it’s like how a person can like a helpless puppy. it’s pity; that’s all it is.”

“th-that doesn’t mean anything.” heeseung felt discomfort sprout inside his chest, branching insidiously in his lungs and up his throat. “that has nothing to do with her! she’s… she’s an angel.”

“really?” ryujin slithered over toward him and placed a hand on his shoulder, clenching it tightly to bring their faces close. “then why’d she tell us about that letter of yours?”

heeseung felt his heart drop to his feet. “wh-what?”

“the letter you left in her locker,” ryujin continued. “what did it say again? something like…” she pretended to brainstorm, tapping her chin with a finger. “oh! right… wasn’t it something like hi, will you please teach me how to date?” ryujin giggled as taehyun joined in snickering from behind.

his breathing quickened. the letter. 

you told him you never told anyone about that. 

did you lie?

maybe they’re bluffing — you wouldn’t do that. and even if you did lie, you would have definitely told heeseung afterward, right?

“the funniest part was the fact that you signed it off like the fucking virgin-loser you are. kind regards, lee heeseu—” they cackled again, this time even louder. they continued to banter with one another by echoing the contents of the letters. 

heeseung felt himself shrink. hot tears burned his eyes as he felt their humiliation pile on and on as though they were determined in hammering him into the ground. 

“oh my god,” ryujin laughed, wiping the tears from her eyes. “gee, thanks for tonight’s entertainment, heeseung,” she chuckles off the rest of her amusement, “i wish i took a photo of the letter or something. so that i could share it around with—”

“no!” heeseung cried as he swallowed the lump in his throat and began to enter a swivet of panic. “d-don’t! i-i—”

“you’re shaking like a leaf!” ryujin pouts, reaching to grab his shoulder before he flinches. “it’s okay. i won’t tell anyone. unlike your girlfriend, i know how to keep secrets,” she whistled. “say, heeseung… i’m keeping a lot of secrets these days, aren’t i?” she brushed his hair with her fingers.

“even yours.”

he stopped dead, chest rising up and down as he attempted to breathe. he tried to clear his tears with rapid blinking, but it only resulted 

“don’t worry. we’ve been nice. we haven’t told her your secret yet,” she winked. 

yet?

“listen,” ryujin’s voice lowers, her finger lifting his chin so that he faces her. “i really don’t want to keep your parents waiting for too long, so i’ll say this: your girlfriend’s not a saint. she’s vicious in her own way. and if you hate us for the things we make you do, then you should hate her, too. why? because she and i are exactly the same — everything we’ve done to you, she’s done to someone else.”

“y-you’re… you’re wrong.” he turned away from her finger.

ryujin hummed once. “well, let’s face the facts.” her lips slowly lifted into a grin. “you’re alone right now, heeseung. she’s not even here. she left you. i saw her get in the car and leave just earlier. go ahead and look outside if you don’t believe me.” 

heeseung’s gaze flickered to the ground.

“but anyway,” ryujin whirls around and exchanges a smile with taehyun. “we gotta go… we wouldn’t want to stay out too late since we have an early morning, right?” she smirks. “we’ll see you tomorrow, heeseung. at the police station.”

“wh-what? why?”

“because someone ratted us out,” taehyun chimes in, eyes rolling. “so we’ll keep your secret so long as you do one more favour for us.”

you can have your puzzle back. i don't want it anymore.

“you can have your puzzle back.” your little sun says, his voice lowering into a register so low that you almost miss it. “i don’t want it anymore.”

the room remained dark as heeseung’s words hung like ghosts in dead silence.

it was deafening, the way his whisper was the softest sound you’d ever heard. you were holding your breath, fearing a reality in which i don’t want it anymore meant something beyond what you could hear at face value.

“i don’t want your stupid gift,” he croaks, burying his face in his hands, stifling a sob. “j-just… please, just leave me alone.”

finding him sitting in the dark room alone and crying made your heart shatter. it was easy to confront the idea that ryujin or taehyun had hurt him, but you weren’t equipped to face the possibility that it might have been you. the distance he was creating between the two of you allowed your inner antagonisms to fester — your chest tightened with unease, exacerbated by the pressure of fear expanding within you.

“h-heeseung,” you blurted in surprise, your throat so parched that it forced you to swallow and brace yourself for what felt like impending heartbreak. “why…”

you were so stunned that it honestly felt as though time had stopped moving for a moment. you allowed space to pour between the two of you — you let a beat pass, then two, then three, then four, and with each one that scurried by, you grew more and more apprehensive that he wasn’t going to retrace his steps. you thought there was a chance he’d backpedal his words and tell you they’d sprung from his chest in the heat of the moment, but instead, he let you soak in abject misery.

your heart sank. above everything, you were terrified — he was slipping away from you like dust between your fingertips. it wasn’t long before tears followed — they blurred your vision, no matter how many times you’d tried to dismiss them with your hands.

“h-heeseung?” you called his name softly and hoped to peel his fingers away from his face, but he flinched at your touch. in every attempt you make in closing the distance, you find that heeseung draws a line between you; each harsher than the last. he recoils at your touch, shrivels at the sound of your voice, and offers you nothing but a view of his back that shields you away. 

he was cowering from you.

it made you feel ill. sick. like the taste of bile was rising to your mouth and leaving an acidic, ghostly burn in your throat. bit by bit, your resolve was crumbling like a house of cards. 

“tell me what’s wrong,” you begged him, crouching before him on the carpet though he curled away from you. “i promise i’ll fix it, okay? i’ll fix everything.” 

“y-you can’t,” he sniffled.

you felt your throat constrict. “why not?”

“because…” heeseung finally lifted his head, and the moment your eyes locked with his bloodshot ones, it felt as though his fear, hurt, and pain ricocheted back to you tenfold and struck you like a stab to the heart. he sniffled again. “because you lied,” you saw his eyes well with tears again, “and i lied, and—” his voice became smaller. “all we do is lie to each other.”

perhaps this was what you’d always feared — that you were going to be the one to break him.

after all, you had a tendency to do precisely that. you can’t even count the number of times you’d accidentally shattered the dishes in the kitchen that your mother adored so dearly. or the number of bones you’d broken during wild dares from late nights. or the countless number of fractured friendships in your life because you never really struggled with breaking — whether they were dishes, or bones, or promises, or hearts.

was he another?

was heeseung just another one of those things you were always bound to break?

“please leave,” his voice was becoming softer, and softer, and softer, further eclipsed by his cries. you could tell he was struggling to make out his words. you could also tell that he was being honest. 

you’ve never had anyone beg you like this before.

“okay,” you whisper, tears littering the carpet. “i’ll leave.” 

unable to look at him any further, you twist on your heels. you do what you do best — you run. you run down the stairs and out the house and run and run and run, ashamed that this story has unfolded the exact way anyone could have predicted.

he hates you, you may love him, and neither of you are puzzle pieces that fit together. 

perhaps heeseung was right; perhaps you truly are sunrises and sunsets, because alike parallel lines, the two never meet. 

perhaps heeseung never taught you to heal after all. perhaps broken bones and hearts can never properly heal, the same way cuts and grazes may leave permanent scars on our bodies. perhaps your body did what it could to fix what broke, but it only took one gust of wind to retrace old scars and re-break what will always remain broken.

you’ve never been very good with your emotions.

you constantly misrepresent them. 

you smile when you’re sad, frown when you’re happy, say things you don’t mean and omit the words that you resonate deepest with. 

after the party, you cried like you have never cried before. it was a foreign, almost out-of-body experience. every emotion exploded and pierced through the thin surface they were bubbling beneath. your scathing tears had soaked everything — your eyes, your cheeks, and your pillow late through the night. the worst of it was the heaviness inside your chest that ceased to subside, one so hefty that it was the reason you felt like you were sinking to the bottom of an ocean.

it was only until the next morning that anger, the emotion you consider to be the easiest to wear, brought you the energy to pay a visit to ryujin. you were going to get the answers to all your questions. 

after all, that was what you’d learned over the years — anger is the only emotion that gets you answers.

which is why you began with ruthlessly banging your fist on her front door.

“open the door, ryujin!” you bellow.

bang! bang! bang! 

what could she have possibly said to heeseung?

bang! bang! bang! 

why? why was it that ryujin was so insistent on butting in your life?

bang! bang! bang! 

was this some form of karmic reparation? was the universe simply rescinding what should have never been yours in the first place?

you didn’t know what you were going to do. or say, for that matter. yet here you were, desperately trying to claw your way up to the surface where the sun kisses the water. to hell you were going to let this heaviness make you sink and give ryujin the satisfaction.

with no response on the other end, you began to kick the door now.

bang! bang! bang! 

“i said, open this fucking d—”

it finally swings open. 

“are you fucking nuts?” ryujin shrieks from the other side, face contorted with outrage and disbelief. she glances at the door before openly gaping at you. “what the hell? you’re going to break the fucking do—”

you waste no time in lunging toward her. you shove her with both hands, thrusting her so far behind that she lurches back and stumbles onto the floor. while sprawled on the ground, ryujin instantly snaps her head up at you and scowls. “what the fuck is wro—”

yet again, you don’t give her much time to react. you step toward her, making her scramble back before her back hits the wall. as the distance between the two of you closes, you crouch in front of her and roughly push the side of her head with a finger.

“what, ryujin?” you smirk vindictively. “did that hurt?”

her chest sharply rises heavily when she meets your icy glower. “get out.”

though she attempts to pick herself up from the floor, you harshly grip her shoulder and force her back down. you reach over and tap her cheek condescendingly, your voice now a lowly whisper. 

“how funny,” you scoff, head tilted. “i thought i told you to stay out of my life.”

she grits her teeth. “i said, get out.”

“why should i? you’re the one who keeps insisting on getting involved in my shit.” 

“you’re batshit.” she gapes at you. “is this about that dweeb?”

“his name is heeseung.” you snap at her, bunching the collar of her shirt in your fist. you yank her toward you, your other fist lifted and curled.

ryujin barks out a dry laugh when her eyes flit to the sight of your fist. “you’re going to punch me?” she snickers again in disbelief. the sight of her grin makes your fist tighten under her shirt. anger. you felt your anger simmer at cautionary temperatures and slowly branch up in your neck to your face. 

“what did you do to him?” you grit your teeth, breathing slowly to control your emotions. 

it was difficult, because you felt as though she relished at the sight of your anger. she must have recognised your most familiar emotion and felt as though you had shifted back into becoming your old self. you saw it in the way her lips curled, and the way her brows had lifted, and most notably, in the way her eyes paraded a small, tiny, starry glint that conveyed her amusement.

it made you wonder if she was doing this all intentionally. 

just to get a reaction out of you.

just to get something.

“it wasn’t exactly what we did to him,” she smirked. “it was what he did to himself, really.”

“where’s taehyun?” you reach over and slowly comb your fingers through her hair, before closing your fist and grasping a bundle of her strands, jerking her head backwards. “i want him to see your face all battered up. you know, before i beat the living shit out of him, too.” 

she sneers at you. “why don’t you ask heeseung? i’m sure he’ll know exactly where taehyun is.”

you narrow your eyes at her. “what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“they’re probably together right now.”

heeseung and taehyun? together?

you scoff. “what?”

she stifles a laugh, and there it is again — that glint. like a tiny star amidst a midnight canvas. you could feel the anger grow like an inferno within you. that glint was pestering you; it was almost begging for you to reach over and extinguish it. you grip her hair harsher, this time yanking her head backward. 

she yelps as you pin her down with a glower. “tell me where.” 

she hisses at the pain of your grip on her hair and narrows her eyes. “police station, obviously,” she spat with a glare.

her eyes met yours, where your confusion must have been evident. those midnight eyes turned with patronising pity. “wow,” she remarked sarcastically. “the idiot still hasn’t told you.”

“ryujin,” you lean toward her and hiss slowly, with the intended effect that each syllable augments your hostility, “say one more thing about him and i’ll bash your skull against the cement.”

“now tell me,” you hiss, “what are they doing at the police station?” though your words appeared to be laced with composed venom, the truth remained that your heart had begun to drum. everything was coming at a surprise — you couldn’t imagine what would ever bring heeseung to a police station, though you could enumerate a thousand reasons for taehyun.

“like i said, heeseung did it to himself.” 

not satisfied with her answer, you yank her hair again and this time she attempts to strike you with her free arm, but you grab her wrist and desist her from doing so. she winces when you pull her hair tighter, prompting her to quickly open her mouth and elaborate. “okay, okay!” she cries. “he was the one who agreed to take the drug test for taehyun!”

your lips drop into a frown. “what?”

“then the police found out, okay?” she seethed. “we needed him to come in and deny everything. happy?”

you stopped in confusion. what the hell was she talking about? as you sifted through the many thoughts that raced in your mind, you finally froze when you began to comprehend the situation.

you remember now. it was that day — the day you’d first met heeseung in the school hallway, when taehyun had set his eyes upon and sunken his claws into his latest victim. 

taehyun was a drug user, and when he was finally caught by the school, he was mandated to perform probationary urine tests. he constantly evaded these tests by intimidating somebody into giving him fake samples. this was common practice, and it just so happened that heeseung was his chosen victim the day you two had first met.

heeseung never told you that.

he never told you that he went through with it.

“i mean, maybe if he’d kept his mouth shut or done a better job at peeing in a fucking cup, things wouldn’t be like this. in saying that, whose fault is it really?” ryujin rambled on, rubbing salt to the wound as your anger multiplied. “it was still fun at least. especially when we got to talk about you.” 

your hand balled into a tighter fist.

“me?” you pin her down with a dark gaze. “what the fuck did you say about me?”

she shrugs smugly. you watched as a sly smile slithered to her lips and her eyes pooled with shiny darkness. “nothing that wasn’t true.”

your heart drops to your feet.

“you know, it’s funny,” ryujin stifles a laugh, “because he denied it at first. said that you were…” she lifts her hands and uses her fingers to show quotation marks, “different.” you felt your anxiety pierce and gush into your stomach. “we laughed in his face. different, my ass. you didn’t tell him, did you? that you’re actually as much of a piece of shit as we are. he even called you an angel, you know that?”

angel.

“so we decided to set the record straight and we told him what he had the right to know.” she giggled. “you didn’t forget, did you?”

you stared.

“the letter,” she reminds you. “he was so embarrassed i think that was when he started to cry.”  

you froze.

the letter.

fuck.

you wanted nothing more than to run to heeseung and clarify the misunderstanding as best that you could. you wanted to talk to him. hold him. apologise and tell him you’d never intentionally hurt him. that it was an accident — that you lied, yes, but you just didn’t want him to feel embarrassed at that time. that it was a lapse in judgement.

but for some reason, something holds you back.

anger.

anger holds you back. 

the thing about anger is that while it may be your most familiar emotion, it is also the most paralysing of them all. and when it’s combined with resentment, it becomes insidious. the reality about anger is that it exists only in the absence of control, a dangerous condition to find yourself in.

nevertheless, you feel that way.

you feel out of control. 

helpless. angry. frustrated.

why? because that glint is still there. the gleaming, ostentatious star in her eyes that flounces around in her own delight. mocking you. 

ryujin is staring at you expectantly, anticipating your reaction.

you know that she’s waiting for you to punch her. to show her you prefer fists over words. to show her you have not changed in the slightest. everything she has done is aimed to get a rise out of you; she doesn’t care about anything else but avenging the fact you had tossed your friendship to the side — that you had tossed her aside. 

in this moment, you realise that no matter how hard you try, you know that ryujin has won. she doesn’t even need to try very hard to show you that you will never be able to change into a better person. your efforts have come to naught. even now, you are held by anger; you want it to control you — even if it means reversing everything heeseung had taught you about not acting upon your impulses; about not fighting fire with fire. 

you wonder how heeseung would react if he found out what you’d done today. that you’d allowed anger to override you and that you had already used your hands on ryujin. 

you pushed her, shoved her to the ground and pulled her hair without a second thought.

after all, you’d proven her right — you are still the same person. 

how would he react? 

these very thoughts loosen your grip on ryujin’s collar.

you slowly retract your hands from her, feeling the heaviness inside your chest gnaw at you. why are you stooping to her level? as you swallow and salvage whatever amount of sense you have left, you shake your head and slowly rise to your feet.

if heeseung saw you now, he’d probably be scared.

he’d probably see them in you.

your sudden withdrawal makes ryujin freeze. she seems taken off guard. she watches you suspiciously as you attempt to compose yourself, noticeably irked by your lack of response. “you’re… not going to hit me?” she hesitates, sitting up slowly. 

“ryujin, you and i are done.” you attempt to stabilise your shaky breaths. for some reason, focusing on heeseung helps your mind from spinning. he’s your anchor and when you use him as your moral compass, he brings the clarity you need. “for real this time.”

“what?” ryujin splutters with disbelief. she pauses, openly gawking. “what the fuck?” she scrambles to her feet and storms over toward you before abruptly shoving you into the door — the impact thunders down your spine and instantly releases a grunt from you, head spinning. 

“hit me!” she taunts you by sneering in your face. “i made your little boy cry. hit me.”

“if he wanted me to, i honestly would,” you spit at her. “you should thank him you’re not bleeding out right now.” 

she yells as you storm away from her house and it occurs to you that there’s really only one person you want to see right now.

you want to tell him that he was right.

you are different from ryujin after all.

and you will do whatever it takes to stray further and further away from being anything remotely similar.

‘you never know.’ ‘you might wake up one day and find that the sun is gone.’ ‘and then it’s like, poof — no more sunsets.’

heeseung was right.

the day you two had first met, you laughed and called him a loser for taking photos of the sunset. after all, he was attempting to immortalise something that was already a cosmic promise. 

honestly, you didn’t get it.

what was the point of taking a photo of something he could see every day?

you realise now that he was right all along – it really was possible to wake up one day and find the sun gone.

everybody just has a different idea of what the sun is to them. for you, yours disappeared when you realised heeseung was doing whatever it took to avoid you over the weekend.

your texts were left unanswered. 

calls were sent to voicemail.

he was shutting you out.

you tried to visit his house on sunday morning, but his mother faced you with a regretful smile and asked you not to come in. you didn’t know what else you could do because he seemed to close down every avenue you pursued.

you were so eager on monday morning to see him at school. you were an hour and a half early as you roamed everywhere, attempting to control your nerves. you didn’t know whether or not you should have waited at the school entrance, or by his locker, or just outside the classroom door. 

it didn't matter, because he was late. 

you were already halfway through the day when you had almost given up, though you got your first glimpse of him in days when he had finally showed up.

he looked almost as horrible as you did.

the darkness under his eyes had grown. his brown hair was fluffy and in plain disarray compared to how he usually styled it. his eyes were so puffy that it looked like he’d been crying all weekend, the same way you had. you tried to catch his eyes, but he didn’t return your gaze and instead slid into his desk quietly with his shoulders slumped.

there was a pang in your chest. his appearance made guilt expand within you. 

did you do the impossible? did you break the sun and make it rain? 

when class finished, you waited outside the door and stopped him when he tried to leave. it was only then that he finally looked back at you and you felt your heart stop. it took you all the strength to not cry, so you snaked a hand around his wrist and led the way to the school’s court garden. 

“heeseung,” you faced him when you both stopped at a quiet place inside the open garden. his gaze was affixed to the grass beneath his shoes, so you took a deep breath and let the words flow from your chest.

“heeseung, i’m so sorry for lying to you about the letter.” 

he didn’t reply.

it stung to hear silence on the other end because you weren’t used to it. you were used to heeseung’s warmth; his smiles, his laughs, and the bright stars in his eyes. instead, he seemed to have retreated back into a shell of dejection.

you gulped and fiddled with your hands. “i-i should have told you the truth. ryujin saw it, yes, but it wasn’t because i showed her. i-i just… she was there when i found it in my locker. that’s it. it’s not an excuse for lying, but i promise i would never intentionally embarrass you.”

you waited for his response and still found silence. this was when panic slowly crept up inside you. 

“i-i really fucked up when i lied to you. i just didn’t want to embarrass you, and the more time that went on, the weirder it felt to bring it up. but i should have told you the truth. i’m sorry, heeseung.”

there was a pause before he finally lifted his head.

“stop apologising,” he whispered so gently you almost missed it. 

“wh-what?”

“it was here,” he tucked his bottom lip between his teeth and roamed the area with his eyes. “i-i think it was here when you told me to stop apologising to people. you said i said sorry too much.” 

god, you felt relief in your chest, it felt nice to hear his voice again. you were worried he might never talk to you again.

as you briefly considered his answer, you glanced around and recognised the bench you two had sat on when he’d tried to confess to lia. he was right — it was exactly here that you two had your first real conversation. your stomach twisted. he always remembers everything.

“i’m really sorry for ignoring you over the weekend.” heeseung finally returned your stare, and once your eyes had met, you felt your heart squeeze at the sight of misery in his pretty eyes. you hate the sight of him like this. this must be one of the worst things you’ve ever done. you wanted nothing more than for the rain to stop and the clouds to pave way for your sunshine.

“i-i just needed some space,” he continued gently. “and actually… mom thought it was a better idea for her to take my phone, so i didn’t see your texts.”

“oh,” you replied, noticing the distant tone in his voice. “it’s okay, heeseung. i understand.”

“but, um… i did a lot of thinking,” he says, smiling weakly.

you smiled back, though trepidation edged along your nerves. “o-okay.”

his eyes diverted to the side. “i… i wasn’t sad over the weekend because of the letter. i—” you saw his eyes flicker upwards toward the sky, as though he was attempting to contain his tears. “i-i think… i was just upset because…” he bit on his lips as you watched him deliberate over his next words. your heart was beating faster and faster at the possibility this may be the last conversation you ever have with him. it was selfish, but you didn’t know if that would be manageable for you. 

because even if he didn’t need you, you needed him.

“because i didn’t tell you about taehyun,” his lips fell into a sad frown. “thing is, i… i was really embarrassed about it. and… well, i-i…” he took a deep, shaky breath.

you knew he was gathering as much courage as he could to speak with you.

“i just really, really, really hate embarrassing myself in front of the person that i like.”

he finally looked up at you and everything in you stopped. blood felt like the crackling of lightning in your veins. every other sound seemed to dull into a deafening silence.

“to clarify, th-that’s you. y-you’re the person that i like. a lot. i like you really a lot— that... doesn’t make sense,” he winced at himself, eyes shut tightly. “i’m sorry, i… i sound so stupid right now.” he slumped his shoulders. 

“heeseung, i—”

“wait. p-please let me continue,” he looked up at you through his glasses and you fell straight into his deer-like eyes.

“okay,” you whispered. “go on.” 

“i… i just want to be good enough for you,” he finally admitted and you felt everything around you crash. him? good enough for you? he already was; he was more than enough. you were the one struggling to catch up with him. “be someone you can depend on. someone you can trust and be proud of.”

“heeseung,” you step toward him and clasp his hands with yours, forcing him to look back at you. “you’re right. you really do sound stupid.”

“h-huh?” he peered up at you as you saw panic flicker like disco lights in his eyes. “i-i’m sorry, i… i just wanted to come clean and not lie to you anymore. i’m really sorry for pressuring you, i—”

“no,” you shook your head, silencing him immediately. “it’s not because of that.” 

you dropped his hands and slid yours in the spaces under his arms where you could wrap around his waist and embrace him into a tight hug. he instantly froze while you allowed yourself to melt into him, your face in his chest.

“fuck,” you mumbled against his uniform, inhaling the scent of his laundry powder. “i missed you like crazy.” 

his heart was hammering inside his chest and you squeezed yourself tighter, finding solace in the synchronicity of your beat with his. 

“two days and i felt like i was going insane,” you gripped his blazer tightly, “i… i thought you hated me.” 

“hate you? n-no way…” 

a stupidly wide smile stretched across your lips. slowly, you noticed heeseung was beginning to return your embrace. his arms slowly found their way to your back, and once they rested on your body, you allowed yourself to take a proper breath, engraving memories associated with his scent.

“i like you too, dummy,” you mumbled against the fabric. “ceaselessly. probably way more than you like me.”

“you—”

“yes, me.”

“y-you… you really like me? for real?”

when you release him, his bewildered expression makes you instantly erupt into a fit of laughter. he seems to take this as an indication that you’re messing him because of the way lips return into a point.

“are you kidding?” you scoffed playfully, grabbing his face and cradling it with both hands, his soft skin against yours. “you make it ridiculously easy to.”

“a-are you serious?” he pointed to himself, lashes batting innocently. “you really like me? me? heeseung? you like lee heeseung? you know i’m heeseung, right?”

you stare, astounded by his reaction. “you’re crazy.”

“no, i just told you i’m heeseung,” he deadpanned.

idiot. “yes, heeseung. you. i like you like crazy. it’s sickening how much i do.”

heeseung watched you expressionless for a moment before you watched his face explode with sunshine. speckles of gold dust returned to his eyes and twinkled like constellations. his smile swept his face and instantly made your heart thump out your ears. 

“you’re not lying, right? you really like me? and it’s definitely because of my bowties, right?”

you almost wanted to groan aloud and slap yourself in the face, but you stifled down this desire and shook your head instead. sickening, you thought to yourself. his sunshine is so sickeningly sweet.

and if there’s one thing about you — it’s that you have a sweet tooth; and heeseung is a taste you have been dying to have.

“yes. it’s definitely the bowties. they’re basically chick magnets,” you remarked, a smirk forming. “do you know what happens to chick magnets?”

heeseung quickly shook his head. 

you smiled. “they get devoured.”

heeseung’s brows slightly furrowed, his head tilted to the side in what appeared to be confusion. he blinked, not quite understanding your implication.

“in other words, i’m going to kiss you.” 

that, he understood. 

heeseung’s eyes instantly rounded like saucers. “h-huh?”

“i know you heard me,” you took a step toward him, circling your arms around the back of his neck to ring him in close. he blushed at the proximity, and if you were being honest, so did you.

frankly, you were more nervous than you’d thought you would be. this was the fastest and hardest you’d ever felt your heart beat; it almost threatened to leap up through your throat. 

perhaps it was because heeseung was an expert at annihilating everything you thought you knew about yourself. he was great at that: showing you that you were much further from who you thought you were, and close to who you thought you could never be. there were no more first, second, third, and fourth experiences anymore. just a life before him and after him.

when you felt his breath nearing and the heat from his chest, you thought your head spun for a moment.  it felt as though the distance between your lips were simultaneously the closest and farthest distances apart. it wasn’t until he sighed – a release of just the faintest, softest breath — that the sound swept through your chest like a hurricane, and you felt everything within you topple over.

your whole body sank forward into his and you kissed him. you shut your eyes and did what you feared most — you opened up your heart to him and let everything you had within you flow out so that he could feel every inch of your warmth and sincerity. you led the movement first, noticing the way he tried to mimic your movements. he was slow and uncertain at first, until he followed through with what felt right. 

when he began to kiss you back, it felt like fireworks shattered within you. you instantly softened when he looped his arms around your waist and hugged you tightly, because there was no safer feeling than being in his arms.

you knew it.

heeseung is good at everything he tries. 

when the kiss deepened, you thought he tasted like he fell from the clouds and the stars. like stardust and eternity and endlessness. you liked the taste of that. all you’ve ever known are temporary people, the leaving and the waiting and the hoping, so it makes all the more sense when you crumble and melt at the taste of forever and focus on carving this memory onto your soul. 

you couldn’t deny it any further — you were falling in love with him. in fact, you’d fallen down a slippery slope that led you into a pit with no way of crawling yourself out. 

when your lips pull away, you’re both panting for a proper breath. it isn’t until your eyes meet that the world stops moving and something warm ignites like a candle. 

you allowed time to pass you by as your eyes raked every feature of his face; drinking in his beauty, indulging in the rare moment you were able to admire him so closely. you felt bewitched by the way the sunlight gently radiated his features; they shone through the sky and struck him like a spotlight, even in broad daylight. being this close to him brought forward all of his prettiest, most finely drawn features – the mole on the left side of his lips, his long, wispy lashes, and the slight scrunch of his brows. 

you should’ve stopped, but you couldn’t, because he was prettier the longer you stared.

time slowed while you were slipping further and further into an enchanting spell.

falling.

you always hated that — the sensation of falling. being out of control; being helpless. but somehow, with heeseung it felt different — you were falling through time and space and the stars and the sky and everything in between. it was really beautiful. 

you’ve been falling for days and weeks and what felt like lifetime across lifetimes. you fell until it no longer felt like falling, but flying.

“heeseung, you’re really bad at kissing, you know that?” 

you felt so bad when his entire face fell and he looked at you with complete horror. “wh-what?” 

you placed a finger on his lips to keep him from talking. “since you’re so bad, i think you need a few more lessons,” you smiled. “let’s ditch school and go to back to mine. you know, for education’s sake.” you winked.

heeseung tucked his bottom lip between his teeth, smiling shyly. “o-okay.”

fin.

a/n: and then they went home and watched Star Wars :) ANYWAYS. guys u do not understand I actually went thru 32842378 cycles of frustration, anger, and giddiness while trying to wrap this series up. I'm not lying when I say I have about 6 different versions of this chapter, but I decided to keep it simple and straight to the point because ultimately that's what I felt triage was all about :) if you came here looking for genuine dating tips& got lost im sorry i can’t help u cos I'm in my healing era (subtext: literally no man wants me). but anyways I hope this series brought you a little bit of joy somehow or another. I honestly had the best time writing it ^^ all the best! hope i to see u in my future works too! thanks for reading! love u so much! <3 (also feedback would be vv nice if u have the time!) MWAH

//

[maiverie]

TAGLIST 1: @baekhyunstruly @lockburn-castle @glcwynini @usedto-me @soonyoungblr @ctrlemis @outrologist @hysgf @wccycc @chiyuv @gyuuberryy @maybee-may @viagumi @strwberrydinosaur @miyukisv @dimplewonie @raikea10 @tnyhees @ineedaherosavemeenow @solelyenha @moon-gyus @reivrze @flwrshee @yoonights @quokkie @eulris @moonchildaera @jungwo-nnie @asyleums @rikisly @lunacrtk @strxbrymilkkuu @heeflrs @meikoo @ashrocker123 @kyrkitten @jhopesucker @florvis @leaderwon @jiawji @stariszn @yourmomni @loviseamms @wvnkoi @jak3sgf @heeverseblog @kabekusa @hoonvrs @jennaissantes

BITE BY BITE . . . (— chapter one ; )

in which you’re a vampire, and heeseung teaches you how he likes to be bitten.

SYNOPSIS. lee heeseung has one reputation, and it’s that he’s not afraid of anything: of rules, of authority, and especially not of vampires. he’s obviously bad news, and for such reasons, you’ve always made sure to never cross his path. it isn’t until one fateful night that you find yourselves face to face and what he tells you makes your entire world flip on its axis.

“bite me, fangs. just like last time.”

PAIRING. college playboy!heeseung x vampire fem!reader

GENRES. romance, fantasy, slight thriller

WARNINGS. swearing; blood and violence; mentions of death; descriptive & suggestive (makeout) scenes (no smut); some angst; heeseung is kind of a dick / overly flirtatious at times / slightly toxic (sorry I'm kinda into that)

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CHAPTER ONE. ╰ 7.0K ✩ ┈ masterlist // next chapter . ╰ warnings : swearing, mentions of death / poison, SUGGESTIVE scenes ** note : this chap will flit back & forth between heeseung & yn's povs

CHAPTER ONE.

“your son will die early.”

they say the scariest type of people are the ones who have nothing to lose.

“he will die before his twenty-fifth birthday.”

heeseung disagrees. 

he thinks those who have everything to lose are far more terrifying.

this was a lesson he learned when he was just twelve years old. 

he’s never really believed in fortune tellers, but that hadn’t stopped his parents from impelling him to visit one on his twelfth birthday. that fateful day was the first spark of what would soon become a raging inferno, because it was then and there that a morbid foretelling had been carved into his fate. 

“lee heeseung will die from two bites on his neck.”

there are two types of responses to a death curse.

one, wait for your death — wither away with each second that passes, like you’re a candle slowly melting until the flame is swallowed by a pool of liquid wax.

or two, be a fire — be a raging, catastrophic wildfire; one that scorches everything within its proximity and doesn’t wait to be extinguished, but has to be extinguished.

you can wait for death or play it like a game. 

heeseung chose the latter. 

he constantly plays dice for death.

“are you scared, heeseung?”

heeseung exhaled, his head thrown back as the girl straddled him. his back was pressed into the couch in the living room of his upscale penthouse, a body flushed against his while the two remained engulfed by midnight darkness — precisely how he liked it. in the dark, every sense felt heightened, like how her delicate fingers spread themselves over his neck, and how her mouth was so close to him that her hot breath tickled the sensitive skin below his jaw. 

“scared?” heeseung echoed with a twinge of amusement, his tongue coating his lips. he held her waist while she leaned forward and peppered kisses all over his neck. “that’s cute.”

“ah, so it’s not your first time being bitten,” the girl purred. she then glazed her tongue across his neck, indulging in a preliminary taste, like an irresistible appetiser before a full-course meal. “i bet you love it then. being bitten, i mean.”

“i guess i do,” he whispered, feeling slightly impatient as he angled his head closer and allowed the sensation of his breath over her ear to make her shiver — “but i love it especially when they stop wasting my time and get to the point.” 

his blunt words sliced through the atmosphere so abruptly that the girl seemed to halt in surprise. heeseung thinks it’s amusing that she reacts like this, because he knows he has a callous reputation that precedes him. is she surprised that what most people say about him is right?

he’s never been the type to dance around his words. he’s honest and forthright and as a result, doesn’t bother to hide the fact that he wants just one thing from this girl — nothing more. 

“o-okay, sorry,”  the girl cleared her throat and licked her lips. she inhaled deeply before opening her mouth wide enough that her fangs began to extend outward. heeseung could feel their sharp tips lightly graze his skin, which roused a flame of exhilaration within him. 

he felt his heart begin to pick up and he shifts in his seat, eyes fluttering shut with furrowed brows. 

a slow exhale escaped his nose.

two sharp pricks.

one.

two.

three.

crunch.

the instant he feels his blood surge up through his veins and out his neck, he waits for that surge of euphoria he had experienced a long time ago.

he waits and waits and waits — but nothing happens.

everything within him falls flat and all his anticipation dissipates like smoke in air.

again.

yet again, he’s disappointed.

they say the first bite for a vampire is a slippery slope, because once you have a taste for blood, the hunger becomes insatiable. ravenous. like there’s an unquenchable thirst to devour, and devour, and devour. 

heeseung wonders if the same could apply to him.

is it possible for humans to become insatiable?

is it normal that every time he finds himself here, his mind always floats back to that one girl?

he hasn’t been able to rest ever since that very first bite. 

in fact, he’s been relentlessly chasing that thrill — chasing her — for years. 

it comes with a sigh and a sharp decline of the exhilaration in his veins that heeseung realises tonight is no exception. 

tonight is just another unsatisfying bite. 

even after four years, he’s still not able to replicate the sensation he had his first time. 

while he knows that bite by bite he inches closer to death, he also knows that there’s only one thing that has ever truly made him feel alive — you, the girl of his first bite. 

tonight is the last confirmation he needs before he has to face the truth.

nobody’s bite has ever felt quite as gratifying as yours.

.

.

.

your dad always instilled one lesson in you: be relentless.

“hi!” you stepped forward to a fellow college student, your hand outstretched with a flyer. “would you like the chance to win a gift card valued at twenty dollars? i’m looking for study partici—”

the student scowls instantly, openly glaring at you. “get out of the fucking way, leech.”  

he shoves past your shoulder, bumping you hard enough that all the flyers in your hands fall and scatter everywhere along the concrete walkway. you stagger back, stunned by the sight of the disarrayed paper sheets on the ground.

second. that was the second time today that had happened. all your life, you’ve tried to come to terms with the fact that humans and vampires might never get along, but being treated this way certainly stung.

being relentless, as it seems, came at the cost of your dignity.

it’s been roughly two hours since you had arrived at your university’s front courtyard, sweltering under the sun in desperation of finding study participants for your course assignment. 

so far — nobody. 

literally not a single soul. 

your genius idea was that you’d be able to take advantage of the booming foot traffic at this time in the afternoon. after all, the courtyard has always been known to be the place students pass in between classes, especially since it’s lavishly embellished with open, wide cement walkways; gorgeous topiaries and flowers; and a stunning view of the main building out front. 

it’s your second year as a nursing student and, in a twist of sickening irony, this semester is all about haematology. blood. the lab project you’ve been assigned is simple: you need to gather some study participants, practise your phlebotomy skills, test their blood, and consult them for any blood-borne viruses. the only problem? it’s been about a month since you were assigned this project and you’ve been wildly unsuccessful in recruiting participants.

the reason why is so obvious that it hurts.

nobody in their right mind wants to trust a vampire with their blood.

be relentless, you echoed to yourself with another sigh, collecting the flyers off the ground.

with what little morsels of resilience you could muster, you stood back up and plastered a polite smile on your face, making quick strides to a pair of girls who were chatting under a large tree. they looked friendly, so you felt a hopeful shine to your lips as the edges tugged upwards.

“hi!” you beamed with a sunny grin, “my name is—”

“go gargle some garlic, fuck-face.” they sneered at you, slamming the flyers out of your hands. 

the flyers once again spatter everywhere on the grass, on which the girls are sure to trample over as they storm off. 

great.

you’re fucked.

there’s no way you’re going to be able to start this project, let alone finish it with a passing grade.

you know the optics of your situation are a little strange, but you really do care about nursing. yes, it’s ironic and ridiculous for a vampire to have anything to do with healthcare, but most things about you were a little ironic anyway. 

you’re the daughter of an eminent vampire and a blood descendant of hundreds of generations — with your inauguration coming up in two months, you were going to be formally recognised as the inheritor of your father’s legacy and fortune. this was supposed to be a prerogative of being the great park kangho’s daughter, but it felt more like a ball and chain to a predetermined future you wanted no part of.

it was all sunghoon’s fault — had your estranged brother not run away from the family like a coward, you wouldn’t be in this situation. it would have been his inauguration.

you know it’s weird that you don’t want anything to do with this, but heck — you barely understood how to be a vampire in the first place. you haven’t even had your first bite yet. it’s strange and a little embarrassing that you’re the first vampire of your family lineage to be scared of biting into a human, but you couldn’t help it — the thought was terrifying and has always been ever since you were a child.

this fear dates back to when you were twelve and a rumor had lingered around your classmates before it finally reached you. apparently, there was once a vampire who bit into the wrong human and died. 

it was unprecedented: vampires were always the predator and humans the prey, which explained your utter horror when the rumor turned out to be true. 

and it turned out to be about your mother. 

since then, you’ve lived your life scared in the shadows, puppeteered by trepidation and the looming fear that you might meet the same fate one day. as you’ve learned, being the one who bites doesn’t necessarily mean you’re the one who doesn’t get hurt. 

in this world, there are fish and there are snakes — people who bite bait and find themselves reeled in, and people who bite with the intention of injecting their venom. 

they both bite, but just one survives. 

frankly, you didn’t want to be either. and perhaps it was these things — a college degree and your new part-time job — that would save you from having to follow your father’s footsteps.

was it so bad to want to pass this semester? 

was it so bad to dream beyond the future set out for you?

you sigh with dejection, unable to withstand the way your shoulders slump. 

you run your fingers through your hair, freezing when your eyes flit into the distance and something catches your eye. 

lee heeseung is seated at one of the bench tables. there’s a crowd of people swarming around him — there almost always is — and he has one elbow propped up on the table, palm up with his chin rested on it. his gaze is initially trained ahead of him while he engages in a conversation with one of his friends, until suddenly — his eyes flick upward and you both lock gazes from across the courtyard.

your heart slows into a halt at the sight of his penetrating gaze, a complete coldness sweeping over your body to keep you frozen.

shit.

you quickly tear your eyes away from him, feeling your heart begin to pick up.

shit. 

shit.

shit.

if there’s one person in the world your father has always warned you about, it’s lee heeseung.

campus heartthrob, lee heeseung.

son of your dad’s most loathed enemy, lee heeseung.

chaos and fire in one pretty package, lee heeseung.

undeniably, devilishly handsome lee heeseung with silver, almost lavender locks and big, brown bambi-like eyes that looked far more innocent than they actually were.

your accidental eye contact was a cruel mistake, because it has now become the catalyst that prompted him to stand and slowly make his way over to you. you felt goosebumps across your skin as you hurriedly tried to gather the flyers in your arms, hoping to make your escape before he reaches you.

after all, heeseung is, for lack of better words — a snake. 

granted, you’ve only spoken to him once in your life, but the whispers of everybody around you seemed to suggest you were lucky. 

as the youngest son of his already notorious family, lee heeseung has the most infamous name in your college, one which induces a mix of both intimidation and intrigue. he has one reputation, and it’s that he’s not afraid of anything: of rules, of authority, and especially not of vampires. his repertoire consists of constant partying, illicit affairs, and a penchant for breaking girls’ hearts and collecting vampires’ bites.

he turned heads in every room he walked and based on the fleeting moments you’d seen him in the flesh, had an aura that was inexplicably captivating. there was a reason why he never struggled in finding company wherever he went — most people found his confidence extremely attractive. 

the worst rumor you’d heard was that he had some sort of obsession with being bitten. and that he’d dismiss people at the drop of a hat once he got what he wanted. you couldn’t think of anything worse than being involved with a callous guy like that, which would explain the utter dread you felt when you saw his shadow hovering over your crouched body.

shit.

you gulp, feeling like cornered prey.

most people agree that he’s all types of bad news — that he’s a fire who easily burns anyone dumb enough to get close — yet he attracts people like moths to a flame. 

a flame.

you were going to make sure you did whatever it took to not get burned.

.

.

.

it’s obvious you don’t remember him.

heeseung thinks it’s kind of funny, actually — because most people are so well-acquainted with his name that when they meet him for the first time, they act as though they’ve known him for years.

but you don’t seem to remember him at all. 

nothing about you seems to indicate that you recall that night you two had first met, about four years ago under a willow tree on a cliff that overlooked the city.

you bit him that day.

while this is a memory vividly engraved in his mind, he thinks the fact you had fainted afterwards must be a contributing factor to your amnesia. 

“a twenty-dollar gift card?” he chuckles, eyes raking over one of the flyers from the pile he helps you pick up off the ground. “sounds fun.”

when he looks up and the two of you stand facing each other properly, heeseung gets the first glimpse of the subtle scarlet glow in your eyes for the first time in years. at once, everything within him ignites like fireworks — he feels excitement expand the walls of his veins while his heart drums with an echo, especially when you stare back at him and your proximity allows your familiar scent to flood his senses. 

he can’t help but lick his lips as his mind flits back to that night and the ecstasy you gave him with just one bite. 

the willow tree. your hair. your hands. your fangs. 

shit. you’re even cuter than you were back then.

heeseung has always had a habit of chasing pleasure.

it’s safe to say he’s decided that you’ll be his next chase.

“uh, thanks,” you whisper, watching him pick up the last of your flyers. he also notices the empty sign up sheet on the ground, so he adds that to the top of the pile before holding it out for you to take.

when you take the flyers from him, he senses your hesitation, which makes it obvious that you probably don’t have the best impression of him. he’s ready to change that. “your study sounds interesting,” heeseung smiles, his eyes following suit in an attempt at assuaging the slight uneasiness in your gaze. 

unfortunately, it has the opposite effect. you don’t do a great job at hiding your grimace, because it’s there in your eyes and in the way your lips slightly dip. you’re suspicious of him. he can’t blame you — after all, he just watched you get shut down and sneered at by several people for half an hour. 

that, and the fact that unflattering rumors seem to follow him wherever he goes.

“not many people seem to think so,” you clear your throat, gnawing on your lips. his eyes trickle down the length of your hair as he notes all the different ways you’ve changed since you last came face to face. “but anyway, thanks again for picking up my flyers.”

“no worries,” heeseung tilts his head with a calm expression, though his lips twitch upward when he sees you tuck your lip between your teeth. 

noted. once is an action and twice is a habit. 

“so where can i sign up?”

“oh, uh — i-i don’t think it’s really your thing,” you let out a breathy chuckle, diverting your eyes. 

“how would you know what is and isn’t my thing?” he steps forward, lowering his head slightly so that you meet his gaze. he has to say that he loves the way you stare back at him — eyes widened in a mixture of surprise and wariness, and even the way you shuffle back in an attempt at creating distance. 

“just an educated guess,” you gulp, hugging your flyers closer to your chest. “you don’t really seem like the type and i wouldn’t want to bore you,” your eyes narrow at him.

“you could never bore me,” heeseung counters, the edges of his lips curling into a small grin. “besides, i’m super interested in haematology.”

haematology… getting bitten by pretty girls… same thing.

he watches your brows slowly furrow. you shuffle back again and he stifles a laugh. frankly, the way you keep drawing the line between the two of you makes this interaction all the more entertaining. 

you appear to contemplate your next words before staring right back up at him with a certain ferocity that makes his heart squeeze with excitement. “actually, i have enough participants already. the study’s full,” you forced a tight smile, “sorry.”

ha. 

what a lie.

you act as though heeseung didn’t just watch you get rejected by half the campus. 

“wow, what a shame,” he shakes his head, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “i really wanted that gift card.”

“i know, right… so disappointing, huh?” you feign regret, solemnly shaking your head with him. “i guess you’re just going to have to pay like a normal person.”

“i guess so,” he chuckled, “but wait — whose empty sign up sheet is this?” he leans forward and swipes the topmost piece of paper from the pile in your arms, holding it up for you to see.

your smile instantly drops. you stare at him in horror as you snatch the paper from him, scrunching it up into a ball. “th-this was a second sheet!” 

heeseung can’t help that a smirk slithers to his lips because he finds this irony amusing — you seem slightly disgusted by him, but his mind runs with relentless thoughts of you like he’s a hamster on a wheel.

you don’t remember him.

perhaps he has to make you remember him. 

“it’s okay,” he exhales with his nose, grinning while he looks you up and down, “it was just an excuse to talk to you anyway,” he leaned in with a playfully raised brow, “maybe even take you out on a date.” 

he wants to laugh out loud when your face drops into a disgusted expression. you’re almost sneering at him with the way your lips contort into a scowl. he wasn’t serious, but he loves to watch the animation in all your reactions. 

it’s entertaining.

it’s cute. 

“um, no thanks,” you scoff, backing away with a few slow steps. heeseung straightens his back, watching you hold your hands up as the distance between the two of you widens within seconds.

“oh, wow, um look at the time!” you quickly check your watch and nervously chuckle. “sorry i-i gotta go! my — uh, dog just died so yeah, bye!”

heeseung attempts to withstand the smile on his face as you twist on your heels and bolt, running as though your life depends on it. you cast just one cursory glance over your shoulder before you disappear from his sight completely, leaving behind a flyer on the ground. 

it should hurt his pride that you’re the first girl to turn him down in such an abrupt manner, but he knows time is on his side. 

after all, things have a way of working out for him.

he has the cheese.

he has the trap.

he just needs to wait for you to bite. 

.

.

.

“do you want to work overtime?”

your honest answer is no. 

your even more honest answer is absolutely the fuck no.

however, your lips are suddenly bobbing up and down like a marionette and you find yourself agreeing to another two hours of what you consider hell on earth. 

as it appears, applying for a new job as a bartender in one of the city’s most bustling nightclubs is the latest addition to your library of horrible mistakes.

decelis is supposedly the best nightclub in the city.

objectively, you can see why it’s so popular among college students. the establishment itself boasted of three storeys plus a rooftop, with an exquisite bar on each level. the atmosphere here is undeniably electrifying, and if you weren’t so painfully sober, perhaps you’d be able to appreciate that.

ironically, clubbing has never really been your thing. 

how could it, when party music is currently resounding in your ears; flashing neon lights are searing your eyes; and sweaty, gross bodies are screaming at you various drink orders from every direction imaginable?

you wouldn’t normally be caught dead in a place like this, but you were desperate for a job. it was just last week that you had waltzed into the club and slipped them your résumé. you honestly weren’t expecting to get the job, but it was an offer you couldn’t refuse when they handed it to you. 

because if you wanted any chance of escaping the web in which you were entrapped, you needed to know you’d be able to fend for yourself.

but as one can imagine, bartending is fast-paced and demanding.

you thought it would be exciting to work with a backdrop of party music and led lights, but your first two shifts were dreadful. you learned over a hundred different recipes, cleaned up vomit five times, skipped your lunch break both days, and found your brain rattling in your skull to the beat of jay park’s music when you stumbled home at five am.

while your coworkers are utterly lovely and you had unbridled access to free alcohol, such things weren’t enough to offset possibly the worst part of the job — the drunk customers. 

“fuck, you’re cute as hell,” the boy drunkenly exclaimed from across the bar benchtop, while you watched him struggle to keep himself erect on his feet. 

“thanks. so is that cash or card?” you stared, a hand hovering over the cash register and the other cradling the eftpos machine. 

“are you a vampy?” he ignored your question, his chortle punctured by a few hiccups. 

you slammed your eyes shut in irritation, regretting the overtime already. the penalty rate wasn’t worth it, because if there’s one thing you detest the most, it’s being called vampy.

nevertheless, you force your lips to curl into a courteous smile, though your stare hollowed like pitless voids. “if you’re asking if i’m a vampire, then yes.” 

“that’s hot,” he chuckles, slipping on his feet but managing to use the bench to catch his fall. “i mean, hella scary — but still really hot.” 

“sir, for the love of god, please tell me if you’d prefer to pay with cash or card,” you sighed while your resolve began to chip away. 

“sir?” the boy gasped incredulously, offended by your implication. “what am i? a fifty-year-old man?”

you sure as fuck act like one. you exhaled, containing yourself. “okay, my apologies. so is it cash or card?” you grit your teeth, fantasising about climbing over the bar and beating the living shit out of the guy.

“oh, just put it on the tab,” he dismisses you with a lazy wave of his hand, then snatches the glass from the bench before sculling its contents in a swift movement. “lee heeseung’s tab.”

of course.

why did you even bother to ask? more than half of the people you’ve served tonight have been stacking their orders on that guy’s tab. perhaps this is why you’ve been having such a shit shift — every second order you take is a horrible reminder of your interaction with the boy from earlier today — which, for the record — is something you desperately wish to forget.

‘maybe even take you out on a date.’

that crazy bastard.

was that supposed to be a stupid joke?

the animosity between your two families has always been obvious — and barring earlier today, he’s never approached you and vice versa. you thought it was an unspoken mutual agreement. 

sure, there have been times you’ve caught his gaze on campus or at mutual events, but that was it — today was the only time he’d gone out of his way to speak to you. this is the reason why you found it so fishy — there has to be something he wants from you, though you can’t quite put your finger on what that might be.

the only time you’d ever interacted with lee heeseung before today was a strange occurrence you recall back in high school, when you had woken in the nursing infirmary and he was sitting beside you with his head resting on your bed. 

these two experiences make you feel the exact same way: like his gaze has a tendency to shoot right through you as if he could read you like an open book. you hate that. you hate his penetrating gaze and his boundless arsenal of smirks and smiles and the way he carried himself like he always had the upper hand.

whatever. 

hoping to rid yourself of these thoughts, you quickly shake your head and divert your attention back to your job.

half an hour passes as you continually hustle behind the bar, attending as many orders as you can. you work as though you have four hands — sprinting around along the circular bar while people shout their orders at you.

eight tequila shots.

three vodka raspberries.

two cosmopolitans.

five apple ciders.

it isn’t too long before your coworker, yunjin, taps you on the shoulder and offers to replace you while you run off for your shift break. 

you quickly thank her and rush to the other, quieter side of the bar, but in the midst of removing the apron from your uniform, you hear a voice suddenly ring.

“is the sign up sheet for a drink also full, too?”

you instantly yelp, jumping in fright from the sudden voice. you snap your head toward its direction, where heeseung is leaning over the counter, smirking at you.

what the actual hell?

you almost feel a little winded at the sight of him. frankly, it’s only been a few hours since you’d last seen him, but he looks like a completely different person when he’s all dressed up for the club.

what replaces his usually clean and casual style is something that exudes confidence and suave charisma. even you find it difficult to deny that he looks as alluring as most people claim. tonight, he’s wearing a black button up top that accentuates his wild shoulders. you notice the first few buttons are unfastened and left open to showcase his pretty neckline and the silver chain around his neck, which glints in the dim lighting. he has half of his silver hair slicked back, the other half swept forward and hanging over his forehead. 

he’s gorgeous, you think, and it almost makes your blood boil.

“i only ask because the sign up sheet to stare is full,” he cracks open a smirk at your deadpanned expression. “but i guess i could make an exception for you.” 

“you’re following me.” 

“actually, i’m a regular here,” he smiles, nudging his chin behind you. your gaze follows his direction and you see a picture of him and his friends hanging from the wall. not exactly a flex that he’s a frequent clubgoer, but he certainly proved his point.

“fine,” you huff in concession. “good for you,” you say sarcastically, reaching down to scoop your bag up in your hands from the lower shelves just behind the counter. 

“before you leave, my go-to is whiskey on the rocks,” he smiles, propping his elbow up so that his cheek can rest on his palm. “i don’t think the owners would be very happy to see a regular leave… unsatisfied.” 

you pressed your lips together, turning your head over your shoulder to see poor yunjin struggling to keep herself afloat, inundated with orders. you sigh, begrudgingly placing your bag back down so that you could pour him a glass.

“look,” you yank the most expensive whiskey bottle from the shelf and pour it into a glass, hoping the end-result of his tab knocks his ego down a peg or two. as you place a few ice cubes in it and slide it over to him, you pin him down with a dark glare and an ugly frown. “i don’t know what the hell it is you want from me, but i’m not buying your act.”

“what act?” he smirked in amusement, taking a sip of the drink you handed him.

“the whole i’m interested in haematology act,” you scoff, too exhausted from your shift to tip-toe around the topic. “look, i’m not interested, okay?” you run your hand through your hair and sigh loudly. “i’m sure you’re a nice guy,” you almost gag on air when you say this, “but you’re just not my type.”

“then what’s your type?”

“i don’t know; guys that don’t creep me out?” you hiss, frankly surprised by your own hostility. you hadn’t planned to be so forthright with your words, but frankly, you were too exhausted to care. heeseung doesn’t creep you out per se — but you knew guys like him only have selfish intentions. they needed to fought with fire. 

you like to think it’s fear that they feed off.

heeseung doesn’t say anything when you throw your bag over your shoulder and stamp away from the bar, and you don’t even bother to cast him a final glance.

however, you’re only able to make it halfway to the exit before you realise you had left your phone behind.

crap.

there’s a moment of hesitation before you decide to go back, because there’s nothing more embarrassing than having to backtrack a dramatic exit.

nevertheless, you begrudgingly twist on your heels and make the shameful journey back, noticing as you near the bar that heeseung is no longer where he had been sitting earlier. the glass you’d poured for him still remains on the counter, but in a matter of seconds, you suddenly see a girl slide into his old seat.

huh.

circumventing the crowd in the middle, you find your way back to the bar and retrieve your phone. as the design of the circular bar allows you to conceal yourself behind the middle pillar, she doesn’t seem to notice you as you watch her through a blind spot mirror on the roof.

you don’t understand the compulsion within yourself, but you allow yourself a minute or two to watch her.

you stare at her big eyes, her medium cut layered hair and the blunt bangs across her face. she looks familiar, you think to yourself, halting once you see her glance over her own shoulders suspiciously.

you watch carefully as she does one last eye sweep of her surroundings before retrieving a small paper packet from her handbag.

what the heck is she doing? 

you stare with a confused frown, eyes slowly widening as you watch her rip the packet open and pour its contents into heeseung’s drink.

she then dips her finger into the glass and swirls it around.

and just like that, the powder dissolves colourlessly and it almost appears as though heeseung’s drink has been untouched.

your heart shoots down your feet when you realise what she’s done.

she’s spiked his drink.

.

.

.

the adrenaline allows you to cast everything aside — your long-awaited break, your animosity with heeseung, and even your bag.

because within milliseconds, the girl springs to her feet and re-enters the dancing floor while you struggle to tail her, losing her amidst the sea of bodies. 

fuck!

fuck. fuck. fuck.

you quickly exit the bar and follow her steps the best you can, though it’s difficult when the lights are low enough that everybody blends into a vague swarm of heads and bodies. she has dark hair, but so do half the people here. her frame and height are small, which makes it all the more difficult to locate her. every time you think you recognise her, you realise you’d been pursuing the wrong culprit. 

everybody in the crowd is shoving you in all different directions.

she’s nowhere to be found.

and you can’t seem to find heeseung, either.

shit.

shit.

shit.

when you feel yourself enter a swivet of panic, you tell yourself to do the most rational thing — grab your phone and call for help. unfortunately, the sheer volume of club music resounding around you makes it difficult for yunjin to hear you on the other side of the call.

thus, you force your way to the outskirts of the club where your voice is more audible, but it’s only here that you finally look up and spot heeseung climbing the stairs to the second storey. 

there he is!

you immediately hang up on the call and thrust your way through people in the direction of the stairs, eyes widening with alarm when you see the girl trail behind heeseung, the drink in her hand. the pair eventually reach the height of the stairs and the second storey, prompting you to yell out his name as loud as you can.

“lee heeseung!” you call, but in a similar fashion to your phone call — the music drowns out your voice. you scramble now, sprinting your way up the stairs while screaming his name loud enough that he finally stops in his tracks.

“heeseung!” you pant for a breath, settling your feet on the second level while you leaned forward over your knees. “w-wait—”

“who are you?” the girl asks, so you snap your head up and sneer at her. 

you stomp over toward her and attempt to grab the glass from her, but unfortunately her grip is equally as strong.

for a few seconds, the two of you engage in a tug of war. 

“wh-what the heck?” the girl shrieks loudly, “what the fuck are you—”

you’re both struggling for the glass, pulling it in your own directions. 

it isn’t until you tug a little too hard that her grip suddenly loosens. 

the cup flies in your direction and tilts toward you and—

splash!

you freeze, gasping at the sensation of cold liquid running down your chest. 

no no no no no no no no—

you look down at your uniform and wince at the sight. 

fuck.

liquid is trickling down your chest and legs and pooling at the bottom of your shoes.

fucking fantastic.

you throw your head back and sigh loudly, shutting your eyes in frustration before slamming them back open. 

“i quit. i think i officially quit,” you mutter aloud, scoffing in disbelief to yourself. with the glass in one hand, you use your free hand to fruitlessly swipe at your uniform in order to flick off whatever remnants you can, though unfortunately the liquid has already saturated your clothes.

passerbys murmur and gawk at the sight of you, causing immense heat to flood your face and ears while you lower your head in humiliation. this is so embarrassing, you think to yourself, desperately wishing to remove yourself from the scene.

while you turn around to leave, you suddenly halt in your tracks and find yourself committing to one more stupid idea.

you storm over toward the pair and grab heeseung’s wrist, yanking him with you as you stomp your way to the backrooms.

.

.

.

“i saw her spike your drink,” is the first thing you say when you shut the door behind yourself, and the two of you find yourselves inside one of the empty vip rooms. 

you’re encased by four padded walls in a dimly lit room, on which colourful flashes of light dance and flicker all thanks to the led projector on the ceiling. 

there’s an entertainment centre and a tv screen on one end of the spacious room, while a circular table and a couch that perfectly circles around its perimeter is on the other side. you storm over and slam the glass down on the table, harshly throwing your bottom onto the couch while you knot your arms across your chest.

“she poured something in that,” you point to the remaining drink in the glass, glaring up at him, “i saw her.” 

heeseung is silent for a moment while he watches you. he briefly tears his gaze from yours to observe his surroundings before facing you again, both brows raised slightly. “wow, you smell great.” 

“you—” you scoff, slamming your hand down on the table in frustration. “you ungrateful piece of shit!”

he immediately stifles a laugh, biting his bottom lip to refrain his grin from growing any wider. “i-i’m sorry?”

“i-i was trying to help you!” you exclaim incredulously, springing to your feet as you furiously storm over to him. “did you not hear what i just said? i said she spiked your drink! do you not understand what that means? for all you know, you could have been poisoned! i was trying to save you!”

momentary silence engulfs the two of you after your outburst. the silence is sobering, if you’re going to be honest. after all, you feel immediate regret trickle in, but before you can backtrack, heeseung tilts his head and watches you with a calm gaze. 

“save?” he echoed while a smirk slithered to his lips, and another important realisation strikes you like a rock to the head.

perhaps you should have just let him die. 

“now look at me,” you throw your hands in the air, scoffing again in disbelief. “i’m drenched in whiskey, god—” you openly gag, “this is disgusting! the least you can say is thank you.” 

“you want me to thank you?” he raised a brow.

“well, you could have died; i practically saved your life,” perhaps this was a hyperbole, but you were feeling petty — he didn’t look as shaken up as you did. frankly, you were beginning to think you cared more about his safety than he did. 

“see, you’re mistaken,” heeseung took a step toward you, causing you to step back. he kept advancing toward you, closing the distance, until you felt your back softly hit one of the walls. 

shit.

having heeseung in such an uncomfortable proximity made you want to shrink into a ball.

“wh-what?”

“i said, you’re mistaken,” you saw his eyes glint with amusement as he placed an arm against the wall beside your head, using it as an anchor while he leaned in closer, your faces now inches apart. you gulp, warmth crawling up your neck and into your cheeks from the sheer proximity and sensation of his hot breath grazing your face. 

“i think it’s cute that you’re worried about me,” you watched as the edges of his lips curled before his eyes landed below your nose. you froze when his fingers were on your chin, lightly gripping it so that he could get a better view of your lips. “but like i said, i don’t need saving.”

“you’re right,” you smiled sarcastically, slapping his fingers away from your chin, “maybe i should have just let her poison you. or sedate you and sell your organs to the black market. do you have a preference for how you’d like to die?” 

“don’t worry,” he whispered to you, voice so low and ghostly quiet you thought you could feel it sweep right through you. “i already know how and when i’m going to die, so don’t bother trying to save me.”

his words struck you.

you frowned in confusion, unable to decipher the cryptic meaning behind them.

heeseung smiled at your reaction, leaning into your ear so that his warm voice sunk into your ears like honey. “in fact, if you’re going to ‘save’ me, then do something else for me instead.” 

you froze, eyes flickering to the bare skin of his neck, on which you see old scar marks that appear like vampire bites.

you quickly place a hand on his chest to push him away, but this contact only seemed to encourage him — instead, he gently grabbed your hand and wrapped it around your waist.

“bite me,” he whispers alluringly, “i bet you want blood more than anyone else.”

your face dropped as his scent flooded your senses.

something musky. woody. a hint of floral.

and a hint of blood.

you felt your eyes drop and your stomach churn, because for the first time, you feel something within you — an itch. an ache. an urge.

a hunger.

“w-wait…” you blurted, feeling a little light-headed while your heart left a hammering echo inside your chest. you swallowed and swallowed but your mouth felt drier than ever. 

“if you’re going to save me,” he exhaled. “then just bite me, fangs,” heeseung lured you in with a soft voice. 

he then leaned in close enough that his breath tickled the sensitive skin of your ear. 

“just like last time.”

A/N. well that escalated quickly 🤠 n e ways I literally had so much fun writing this chapter (sorry i cbfd proof reading lel) bc this is my first vampire au. also my first playboy au so BE NICE PLS DONT TEAR ME TO SHREDS LMFAOOO 😭 anyway words cannot even describe how excited I am for this fic - I've been craving the thought of writing smh a lil more actiony/thrilling than my usual romcom repertoire SO. I hope u r strapping urself in for a riiiiiiide >:) ANYWAY HOW ARE WE FEELING ABOUT HEESEUNG LIKEEEE idk about u guys but personally I am giggling blushing twirling my hair at the thought of silverhaired bite me!heeseung huehue but anyways anyways uhh tysm for reading && I hope u guys enjoyed the first chap!! lmk what u thought!!!

likes, rbs & feedback are always appreciated! :) ╰ ✩ ┈ masterlist // next chapter .

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MISCONDUCT ┊ LEE HEESEUNG SMAU — CHAPTER 7.

because scammers deserve a love story too 💔

SYNOPSIS! by day, you’re a broke college student. by night, you’re a kpop reseller who scams gullible people out of their money. business is good (great, even) until your next customer lee heeseung goes into a blind rage when he discovers the jimin photocard you’ve sold him is hella fake.

WARNINGS! lots of swearing, sexual & dirty jokes / crude humor, kys/kms jokes, unhinged/unfiltered/unrealistic dumbassery, yn is a money whore, my horrible ass sense of humor, ignore timestamps pls, slow/irregular updates probably

╰┈➤ prev ┊ MASTERLIST ┊next (chapter 8)

CHAPTER 7 ꗃ IM EVERYWHERE BITCH

A/N.‏‏‎ ‎ haha…. it’s been like 9 months since the last update 💀💀 YALL IM SORRY. i’m back tho hey wassup 🤪 HSHDHAH IM SO SO SORRY FOR LEAVING THIS SMAU 😭😭💖 but here’s a quick update :> i got a new phone and lost all the pics hence the new pfps 😭 srry for the confusion!! tysm for reading :))

TAGLIST IS OPEN — send an ask, dm, or reply! :>

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MISCONDUCT ┊ LEE HEESEUNG SMAU — CHAPTER 6.

because scammers deserve a love story too 💔

SYNOPSIS! by day, you’re a broke college student. by night, you’re a kpop reseller who scams gullible people out of their money. business is good (great, even) until your next customer lee heeseung goes into a blind rage when he discovers the jimin photocard you’ve sold him is hella fake.

WARNINGS! lots of swearing, sexual & dirty jokes / crude humor, kys/kms jokes, unhinged/unfiltered/unrealistic dumbassery, yn is a money whore, my horrible ass sense of humor, ignore timestamps pls, slow/irregular updates probably :<

╰┈➤ prev ┊ MASTERLIST ┊next (chapter 7)

CHAPTER 6 ꗃ S**GH**N P***

A/N.‏‏‎ ‎ haha…. sorry for the horribly late update 😭 i’m in my unfunny era 💔 but is it still an era if it’s been going on for a while tho ha ha ha ha aha n e ways HEEYN FINALLY MEETING IRL NEXT UPDATE ARE U GUYS EXCITED?????? :00 also ykw i am very proud of sunghoon like it takes guts to make porn of urself and send it to ur friends👍 everybody clap rn ( ALSO YES…… hee’s gna find out ab the photocard soon…… 😍)

TAGLIST IS OPEN — send an ask, dm, or reply! :>

TAGLIST 1: @enhyflirt @dreamyenskz @icedcoffeesunwoo @ssolari @skazoo @jjunis @heejake-en @koroktsuya @tinykoi-s @en-boyz @ilandsghost @soobin-chois @blessed-sky @jhyunieee @kisswon @vbxrin @cosmicsunghoon @bloomedberry @jeongwins @jungwonielove @miiiwaa @jungwoniee @lhsng @missharubear @deonuism @sarahxy537 @bambisgirl @hrrhmay @yeonzzun @msxflower @sunsunu @jangwonie @sweetjaemss @seungstarss @tokyoflies @solelyenha @softforqiankun @goodforgyu @va1ry @taekbokki @ashxxkook @moon-gyus @jakeified @markleeisdabestdrug @wccycc @viagumi @pissss111 @outrologist @fairfairee @hiqhkey @ctrlemis

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「 MISCONDUCT」 ┊ LEE HEESEUNG SMAU — CHAPTER 2.

because scammers deserve a love story too 💔

SYNOPSIS ➟ by day, you’re a broke college student. by night, you’re a kpop reseller who scams gullible people out of their money. business is good (great, even) until your next customer lee heeseung goes into a blind rage when he discovers the jimin photocard you’ve sold him is hella fake.

WARNINGS. lots of swearing, sexual & dirty jokes / crude humor, unhinged/unfiltered/unrealistic dumbassery, yn is a money whore, my horrible ass sense of humor, ignore timestamps pls, slow/irregular updates probably :<

╰┈➤ prev ┊ MASTERLIST ┊next (chapter 3)

CHAPTER 2 ꗃ HUMAN TRAFFICKING

A/N.‏‏‎ ‎ LMFAOAOAOAO HEESEUNG’S A SHAMELESS BITCH HSHDHDD 😭😭😭 also guys THANK U SM FOR 500 NOTES ALR 😭😭😭 i’m so grateful and a little turned on 💔💔💔 yall r the best hehe <333 n e ways lmk what u think of the smau so far <33 MWAH

TAGLIST IS OPEN — send an ask, dm, or reply! :>

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MISCONDUCT ┊ LEE HEESEUNG SMAU — CHAPTER 5.

because scammers deserve a love story too 💔

SYNOPSIS! by day, you’re a broke college student. by night, you’re a kpop reseller who scams gullible people out of their money. business is good (great, even) until your next customer lee heeseung goes into a blind rage when he discovers the jimin photocard you’ve sold him is hella fake.

WARNINGS! lots of swearing, sexual & dirty jokes / crude humor, unhinged/unfiltered/unrealistic dumbassery, yn is a money whore, my horrible ass sense of humor, ignore timestamps pls, slow/irregular updates probably :<

╰┈➤ prev ┊ MASTERLIST ┊next (chapter 6)

CHAPTER 5 ꗃ FREE BINGBING

A/N.‏‏‎ ‎ ngl…. the only reason i even wanted ninghoon was for this one specific chapter 😭 he’s so fucking vile and i love it GSHDHDHA 👍👍 safe to say ningning is traumatised and she’s not gna come out her house for any more appearances HAJSJAJSJSKAJA 😭 and yesss this is only part one of sunghoon hitting on girls,, winter is next 😁👍 (p.s. thanks for reading ily the next update will b quicker i promise) 💓

TAGLIST IS OPEN — send an ask, dm, or reply! :>

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triage — ft. lee heeseung (chapter III)

you try to teach the nerd how to date.

synopsis: heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.

given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"

MASTERLIST HERE !

kayla’s playlist (@/miiiwaa) ♡ my shitty og playlist . tags : #.*triage .

TAGLIST

@jaeyummies @enhyflirt @kyleeanne @icedcoffeesunwoo @ssolari @skazoo @jjunis @heejake-en @koroktsuya @jeongwins @tinykoi-s @en-boyz @soobin-chois @blessed-sky @jhyunieee @kisswon @vbxrin @cosmicsunghoon @bloomedberry @jungwonielove @miiiwaa @jungwoniee @lhsng @missharubear @deonuism @sarahxy537 @bambisgirl @hrrhmay-primaryblog @yeonzzun @msxflower @sunsunu @acciomylove @sweetjaemss @seungstarss @tokyoflies @solelyenha @softforqiankun @goodforgyu @va1ry @taekbokki @luvishee @jalnandanz @person-standing @kissomen @auulraual @sonjuyeonnie @yunhowooyo @tomorrowbymoa-together @markleeisdabestdrug @aizzon @sosoa @seventeeneration @ashrocker123

chapter three

word count: 5.6k | navigation: previous / next / MASTERLIST warnings: swearing, (verbal) bullying

‎‎‏‏‎ ‎

the first time someone had ever given you butterflies, you must have been nine. at that age, you were deathly afraid of boys, and yet one of them had held your hand tightly underneath the teacher’s desk during a game of hide and seek. 

the physical contact alone had made your stomach twist into a knot, though the proximity between your breaths was what had made your heart thrash inside your chest. 

the second time, you were fourteen and on your very first date. you were at the cinemas, attempting to concentrate on the latest release when he’d leaned into your ear and told you that you looked pretty. he was right — you did look pretty, but that was something you could hardly concentrate on given how nervous you were. 

you could only think about how hot his breath was; that it tickled the sensitive skin of your ear; that when you turned your face toward his, he’d gaze at your lips and every inch of your skin felt ablaze. 

for many years, you collected your firsts, seconds, thirds and fourths, until they eventually fizzled into an ambiguous cloud of experiences; a hazy miscellany that no longer held meaning. now that you’ve gone on countless dates and have had far too many boyfriends and flings to remember, it’s hard to recall the last time anyone has ever given you butterflies.

it’s been so long since your stomach churned and slushed and you felt your heart pound out your ears; it’s been so long since you’ve last felt something. 

‘okay, miss sunset! ^_^’

well, maybe until now. 

“dude, fine. i’m sorry, okay? you can quit giving me the cold shoulder.”

ryujin’s words might only be a low whisper inside the main hall during a school assembly, but they sound more like a kiss in the rain. you smirk triumphantly, eyes trained ahead as your headmaster lectures you and the rest of the student body about some new vandalism discovered in the boy’s toilets. 

“... such behaviour will not be tolerated! we ask that the perpetrators step forward and…”

ryujin audibly groans from your silence. “are you even listening to me?”

“not really,” you reply dryly.

“oh c’mon!” she moans louder, aggrieved by your cold response. she squirms in her chair and pouts at you. “i’m sorry, okay? i won't do it again. i swear, i—”

“girls, shhh!” a passing teacher glares at you both, hovering a finger over his lips. you cast him a curt look, waiting for his exit before turning your head back to ryujin.

you compress your lips into a line, recalling all the jokes about heeseung they had piled on during lunch. 

“they were just jokes; we didn’t mean them.” she insists. “you know us! we joke around all the time.” the ends of her lips dip into a frown. “but that’s beside the point. they were mean and uncalled for and i’m sorry. can we please be friends again?” 

can we please be friends again? after the lunch incident, you’ve been cold and distant. it’s only been around two days since then, though interestingly your silence is what makes her apologise — not guilt or repentance, just the inconvenience of not having your friendship. 

then again, she’s right. they do joke all the time, though it’s not just about heeseung — it’s also about the “weird” girl with a stutter in taehyun’s chemistry class; it’s about the new transfer kid and his ugly shoes; and it’s about soobin’s pathetic teacher and the fact that he has two jobs to make ends meet. their jokes are not new and certainly not exclusive to heeseung — they’ll tear anybody down if provided the opportunity.

and perhaps this is why you’re mad — not just because your friends are mean people, but if the old adage “birds of a feather flock together” rings true — then what does this say about you? 

is their behaviour a reflection of who you are?

and if so, how are you any better than ryujin or taehyun?

“look, i’m not in the mood for this.” you hiss, peeling ryujin’s grip off you. “besides, don’t say sorry to me; say sorry to lee heeseung.” 

“since when did you care so much about that kid?” ryujin scoffs, offended by your response. “you didn’t even know who he was a few days ago and now you’re suddenly acting like his fucking mother.” 

you bite the inside of your cheeks, feeling a prick of annoyance. truthfully, it takes a lot of willpower not to beat her ass into the ground, as admittedly that’s your usual way of fixing things. you’re normally the type to communicate with your hands, or at least with venomous words. 

instead, you unclench your fists and scoff at her. “you don’t sound very apologetic.”

“because there’s literally nothing to apologise for.” she finally seethes. “shit, dude, why are you acting like you’re mother fucking teresa? let it go already.”

unbelievable, you think. after all her apologies two seconds ago. “you know what? fuck you.” you narrow your eyes at her, feeling anger vibrate off every edge of your body.

“excuse me?” she sneers. ryujin is livid. she scoffs, eyes widening in mixture of shock and anger.

“yeah, fuck you.” you roll your eyes, no longer able to disguise your utter disdain. “you’re pissing me off. stop begging me to look at you when you’re not even sorry or you don’t see the issue.”

“are you fucking kidding me?” ryujin snaps. “you literally ignored me for two days and now you’re acting like you’ve got a stick up your ass?” she gapes at you with sheer disbelief before finally snapping. “nah, honestly fuck you too. we’re done.”

.

.

.

you’ve honestly seen better days than this one.

following your fight with ryujin, classes with her as your permanent seatmate have been torturous. in fact, the heightened tensions were so great that even your teachers had begun to notice.

there were many other benefactors contributing to your horrible day — you’d discovered a rotten banana you’d accidentally left inside your locker; taehyun asked to borrow fifty dollars and got pissed when you said no; and this.

this — the cherry on top.

sim jaeyun, that conceited piece of shit! 

you angrily stomp your way down the cement paveway, furious from the phone call you had just exchanged with your older brother. 

“no. you need to learn from your own consequences.” 

“yes. i learned. i learned that my brother is an inconsiderate asshole that blows shit way out of proportion!”

“whatever, dude. i’m not picking you up. just walk home! it’s not even that far. or get your so-called bestie ryujin to drive you!” 

“but—”

“laters!”

for fuck’s sake. 

maybe he’s not wrong — a thirty-minute walk home is certainly doable, though you’re mostly enraged by his attitude. given that he’s been expressing his disapproval for your friends for as long as you can remember (though you’d rather die than admit that he was right about them), he’s obviously still angry at you for going out drinking with ryujin that time a few nights ago. who was he to think he could micromanage your life and punish you when it didn’t go his way?

now that you and ryujin aren’t on the best terms currently, you’ve been left to walk home.

grumpily, you fasten your handbag around your arm and heave a hefty sigh before trodding along your way. at this time of year, you’re far into your favourite season, spring. as you walk, you eye the flourishing spring blossoms and the leaves they pepper across the cement.

and from this activity, you’re able to drown out the time. ten minutes pass while you silently make your way home, though the sound of a bell ringing garners your attention.

you freeze in your tracks, realising somebody is behind you.

that’s when you throw your head over your shoulder.

what—

you screech to a halt. lee heeseung? on a bike?

you blink rapidly, waiting as he speedily approaches you on his bicycle. he greets you with a toothy grin and crescent eyes, something so contagious you feel your soiled mood brighten just a little bit.

“hi!” he beams, slowing to an eventual halt. you blink at him, shuffling back so that he has enough space to climb off his bike.

“heeseung? hey,” you reply coolly. “what… what are you doing here?” you merely blink, swivelling your head around in an attempt to see if he brought company. as he appears to have come alone, you continue the conversation without restraints. “also, nice bike.”

heeseung smiles again when your eyes meet, causing heat to creep up your cheeks while memories flood back into your mind. miss sunset, video games, and bowties are all you can think about. well, that and the fact that his helmet looks far too big on his small face. and also, he’s literally the only person you know that actually wears knee and elbow pads when he rides a bike.

“oh, well this is my usual route home!” heeseung brushes the hair away from his face, wiping sweat with the back of his hand. “and thank you, it’s my mom’s.” 

“i can see that.” you stifle a laugh, noticing the hand-painted yellow daisies along the skeleton of the pink bike. on top of that, there are pink streamers pouring out from the handles. “it’s pretty,” you comment honestly. in times like these, you admire heeseung — ironically enough, he’s not one to care about how others perceive him. it’s courageous, you think.

“do you need a ride home?” heeseung offers kindly, lips curling into a cute smile. “on my mom’s pretty bike?” he rings the bell on the handle once more, eliciting a slight chortle from you. dork. he’s a whole dork. “i’d offer a car, but mom needed it today.”

“hm,” you smirk playfully. “don’t worry, i think bicycles are much sexier.”

“r-really?” his eyes brighten, before the light in them quickly dims. “oh.” his lips sink with disappointment. “are you being sarcastic?”

you start to chuckle, amused by his reaction. once again, you are marvelled by his unique, natural charisma. he’s a lot easier going than one would think; he’s always been open and welcoming with you, and if anyone put in the effort, you’re sure they’d think the same way. 

you smile at him. “a ride would be lovely, thank you.”

he immediately brightens from your response. “c-cool,” he quickly nods, playing off his excitement so nicely you wouldn’t have noticed if you hadn’t seen his lips tremble. “a-actually, i… i wanted to offer one before but then i realised i only had one helmet and it was… well, it was on my head. so i went back to the store to buy one. i hope this colour is okay.”

you blink.

huh?

he quickly scrambles for his backpack, which you now notice is visibly pregnant. when he unzips it, he extracts a matte, baby pink helmet from inside.

“y-you bought that?” you openly gawk at him. “what? why?” you ask, horrified by the inconvenience.

“motor vehicle accidents aren’t a joke.” his lips descend into a serious frown. he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, signalling the commencement of his professor-serious-nerd mode. “they’re among one of the leading causes of mortality and morbidity across the world.”

“wow,” you snort. “you act like you’re going to start drifting on your bicycle or some shit.”

his brows furrow, unimpressed by your sarcasm. “we could get hit by a car! you could get a brain injury, or a spinal cord injury, or a compound fracture!”

“oh no,” you remark sarcastically again. “that’s, like, so much worse than a normal fracture!”

his pout digs into his features. “i’m serious!” he whines while holding out the helmet for you to take.

you chortle, already feeling your mood lift. it’s truly amazing how easily good company can assuage one’s bad mood. “heeseung, i think i’ll be fine. you should return it; save your money.” you gently push the helmet back to him.

he huffs in annoyance, though you retaliate with a calm smile.

you open your mouth to eject another satirical remark, except he steps toward you and gently places the helmet over your head. you freeze from the sudden action, feeling his warm hands rub against your chin as he fastens the clip beneath it.

“just in case.” he whispers, ensuring it fits snugly on your head. after your heart stops, you feel it restart and begin to pound recklessly. “there are some elbow and knee pads in my backpack too.”

second. that was the second time heeseung has ever made your heart flutter, and the worst part might just be the fact that he has no clue.

you gulp, feeling the heat begin to branch up to the tip of your ears. you’re too utterly speechless to say anything, so you merely blink and nod quickly. you watch with a held breath as heeseung straps your joint pads on you. this is hardly a task that requires the two of you, but you nevertheless allow him to do this.

when he’s finished, heeseung swings his leg over his bike and pats his hand on the rear rack, which you assume is your seat. 

“oh, uh, th-thanks,” you mumble, forcing yourself to snap out of your daze. you plant yourself onto your seat, feet resting on the chain stays on each side of the wheels. slowly, you snake your hands around heeseung’s waist, pulling the two of you close. 

he instantly stiffens from your action, but you nevertheless allow yourself this simple joy — because while most boys liked to impress you with their big, impressive motorcycles and cool tattoos, heeseung offers you a simple ride home in his mom’s pretty bike; and somehow, the latter is more than what you need right now.

click!

“d-do we really have to do this?”

you purse your lips, ignoring heeseung’s question. instead, you lower your phone screen and examine the photos you’ve just captured, channelling special attention to the quality of the lighting and backdrop. 

what you’re searching for is cohesion — the cohesion of colours, to be specific. after all, the key to taking any good picture is an aesthetically pleasing blend and placement of colours and objects. 

“you look a little uncomfortable, heeseung.” you mumble, swiping through your collection, only to take notice of the awkward expression on his face. it’s plastered onto every single picture you’ve taken, though honestly, awkward is a severe understatement. 

in truth, he looks… fucking petrified. 

god, he’s staring into the camera with such terror encased in his eyes that he seriously looks like you’re about to eat him. or like you’re holding him at gunpoint. or like you’ve kidnapped him and are threatening to cut off all his toes to sell them for cash.

maybe he hasn’t warmed up to the camera just yet, you try to tell yourself. it’s been almost two hours since you randomly rocked up at his doorstep this saturday morning and dragged him out to visit the most picturesque cafe you know — belle epoque; a well-adorned, popular french-inspired indoor garden cafe.

at this hour, the cafe is bustling and absurdly busy, however you’re determined to untangle your next dating lesson. 

HOW TO DATE — LESSON 2 — create an attractive, confident image for yourself and never break character. like, ever.

“i… i’m not very good at taking photos.” he shyly admits, squirming as he nervously adjusts the black denim jacket he looks quite dashing in. there’s a reason why you had picked it out for him — it’s ridiculously flattering on his build; it accentuates the width of his shoulders and length of his chest. and, paired with dark ripped jeans, exudes a handsome, striking bad boy image he’s obviously not used to projecting. 

nevertheless, you’ve come here with a mission, and with the new instagram account that you’re setting up for heeseung, he’s going to have to get used to it. 

“i’m the one taking the photo, all you have to do is sit there and look pretty.”

“but…” he scratches his scalp with a finger. “i don’t know how to do that.”

“confidence, heeseung. it’s about confidence.” you iterate, swirling your straw around your iced latte as you return his stare. “you need to sit there and be confident. make this cafe your bitch.”

“my… my bitch?” he gapes at you, puzzled by your words.

“yes, your bitch.” you grin, excited by the image reform you’ve prepared for him. surprisingly, he’s pulling off this new look quite well. he looks great — really handsome, actually. the all-black fit makes him look tall and intimidating, and given that he usually has his hair styled downwards and concealing his forehead, you like how it looks partially styled back. earlier, you had even taken the liberty to use gel to style a few of the front pieces.

heeseung nods slowly at your words, seemingly taking his time to absorb the meaning of them. “o-okay.” he mumbles, nodding more rapidly to himself. “confidence. right. it’s about confidence.”

“yes.” you smirk, sipping from your cup. heeseung mirrors your action, lifting his iced tea to his lips. “so basically you can either sit there looking like you have a twenty-inch dick or you can stay looking submissive and breedable. which one is it that you want?”

heeseung instantly spurts out his iced tea and splutters everywhere, completely taken aback by your vulgarity. you stare at the mess he makes across the table and grimace, while he begins to profusely apologise for his mishap.

“s-sorry!” he squeaks in embarrassment, face turning ablaze as he rushes to wipe up his tea. “i-i was just surprised—”

you can’t help it.

you burst out into wicked laughter now, doubling over in your seat as you clutch your stomach. heeseung frowns at you at first, though soon he begins to slowly laugh with you, until you’re both two giggling maniacs inside one of the busiest cafes in town.

within a week, your friendship with heeseung blossoms.

soon, your interactions extend far beyond intermittent interactions. eventually, you’re texting him at night. then mornings. afternoons. weekends. you distance yourself from the rest of your social circle and spend your lunch recess with him at the community garden. there, you let him ramble on about his favourite bird species and all the behavioural observations he’s collected about the cute ones you recognise. you stifle giggles during class while he floods your inbox with ridiculously dumb chemistry memes. he’ll turn his head over his shoulder and you’ll sneak small smiles at each other, just for the teacher to scold him to turn back around. you complain about your least favourite classes and he’ll draw little comic strips in your notebooks so that they can keep your entertained. you steal his glasses as a joke and lovingly tease him for how strong his prescription is. you divulge all your favourite hairstylists (the ones you swore to gatekeep) and craft him pinterest boards for fashion inspiration. you drag him around the shopping mall despite his whiny protests. he takes you to gaming cafes and libraries and introduces you to all his beloved librarian aunties.

there’s a point where he becomes the only friend you have, and you forget the late nights partying and smoking. soon, you break records you never thought could be wavered — in fact, you shatter your past favourites and replace them with new ones — smiles you thought could not be wider; laughs you thought could not be louder; photos you thought could not look more lovable.

and he’s also the first friend you’ve spoken about to your parents.

“he’s so cool. you can literally ask him anything and he’ll be able to tell you all about it. he’s literally like a walking wikipedia, it’s insane.”

“mm. really?”

“yep!” you shove a piece of watermelon into your mouth and grin while seated at the kitchen counter. “he’s so smart. one time i literally asked him if he knew anything about sustainable agriculture and he went into an hour-long rant. honestly i didn’t know what the fuck he was saying but it was pretty cool he had anything to say in the first place.”

your mother wrinkles her nose when she laughs. “yes, dear. you told me that already.” 

“did i tell you that he’s the top student in our school?”

she stifles another laugh. “yes, that too.”

“oh! right. yes. first date tips!” you lower the ice cream cone in your hand and turn toward heeseung. he blinks at you from across the park bench while timidly licking his strawberry cone.

“dress well. smell good. make sure it’s not longer than four hours because fuck that shit. text her afterwards, and if you drop her off, make sure you wait until she goes inside the house before you drive off. oh, and make sure to compliment her. but be sincere; it’s kinda obvious when you compliment somebody and don’t really mean it.”

heeseung bobs his head slowly, quietly absorbing your words. you continue to unload your years’ worth of dating wisdom onto the boy, scouring through archives and archives of learned lessons. 

“unpopular opinion, but i don’t really think cinema dates are all that,” you continue while consuming your delicious treat. “it’s two hours and for what? the two of you to sit there in silence? big whoop.”

“hm…” heeseung taps his lips thoughtfully. “so you prefer talkative dates? like, um… sitting and chatting?” he smiles expectantly at you, a hopeful glint in his eyes, though you quickly distinguish that light the instant he sees your smile fall.

you cringe. “oh god no.”

his smile falters. “n-no?” his eyes round with surprise.

“hell nah,” you shudder. “do you know how insufferable that is? especially when all the guy talks about is gymming. like, bitch, why are you regurgitating the nutritional information of protein powder? do i look like john cena to you?” 

heeseung giggles from your joke, causing you to smile softly. 

perhaps you are utterly crazy for thinking this, but you think the sound of heeseung’s laugh is melodic. and cute. and contagious. and adorably innocent, and lately, it’s been incredibly refreshing being able to see and hear such wholesome things coexist in a world you’ve always regarded cynically. 

truthfully, being around heeseung is almost like a healthy addiction — you’ve been primed for badness all your life that even goodness has begun to feel enticing. though admittedly, you feel a prick of impending doom. are you preparing him for a world that’ll eat him alive? that’ll dim his chandelier eyes and rob his toothy smile and stifle his childish laugh?

you know all about what people want these days. people don’t want romance. they want short-lived highs and pretty trophies to align neatly along a shelf, just to discard when they’ve fulfilled their purpose. 

heeseung is special. you’re never normally wrong about these things. he is kind, and gentle, and in a single word — good. he is everything you’re not used to and everything the world loves to corrupt. after all, he has the power to convince a stony-hearted pessimist that even she is deserving of this friendship. 

“c-can i ask you a question?”

your eyes instantly flutter toward him. you quickly nod your head, watching him with anticipation, though you feel the melted liquid from your icecream begin to reach your fingers. “sure. what’s up?”

heeseung clamps his lips together nervously. you watch as his brows knit together and he scratches the back of one of his ears. as you’ve noticed, that was one of his awkward quirks — he tends to scratch his hair, or his ear, or his nose whenever he felt emotionally unequipped to say whatever it is he wished to. 

“um… well, d-do you want to be, like…”

be…?

“be, um… be my…”

be his…?

“my…”

his…

“date?”

you freeze, feeling the world slow into an eventual halt. his date? your eyes instantly widen, though you’re not quite quick enough with your response. 

“i-i mean, not a real date-date, i meant, like, date to my aunt’s wedding!” he quickly adds, waving his hands around as though he’s attempting to dismiss a misunderstanding. simultaneously, he may be attempting to disperse the tension circulating in the air. “i-it’s just that my cousin got sick over the weekend, and so there’s an empty seat th-that’s already been paid for, and… well… my mom suggested that i, um… that i ask… you.”

oh.

“y-you totally don’t have to!” heeseung squeaks, brushing his hair down to cover his forehead while redness begins to diffuse across his cheeks. he visibly fidgets the more time goes on. “no pressure. it’ll probably be really boring anyway, it’s just that you’re the coolest person i know, and um, okay, i’m so sorry maybe no—”

“i’d love to.” 

there’s silence before he snaps his head up at you. “r-really?”

“yeah,” you slowly smile, nodding with increasing momentum. “sounds super fun. i’ve actually never been to a wedding before.”

heeseung instantly erupts into a wide smile. he beams like sunshine at midday — you smile back, feeling your heart swell with glee as he excitedly grips both your shoulders and lightly shakes you. “r-really?” he exclaims excitedly. “this is going to be so fun! i’ll… i’ll make sure you have lots of fun for your first wedding then!”

you giggle. “yeah, you better take care of me then.”

he nods ecstatically. “i’ve got the perfect bowtie for the occasion!”

.

.

.

though you expect nothing less, the wedding turns out to be a blast. actually, it exceeds your expectations entirely, though you suspect it’s because heeseung truly has made it a priority that you enjoy yourself. 

throughout the hours, there is not a single reason for you to not have fun, especially not with heeseung as your date. he drags you around and introduces you to his extended family, simultaneously spilling all the family secrets and the embarrassing nicknames people have collected over the years. you both go around sneaking food into people’s drinks, giggling childishly about the thought of somebody finding a macaroni at the bottom of a glass of cabernet. 

you sing, you take photos, and you chat for hours though it feels like a quarter of one. neither of you know how to properly ballroom dance, so you end up stepping on each other’s feet and stumbling over one another the entire time, though it’s more funny than anything else.

eventually, as you near the end of the night and heeseung offers you a ride home — a proper car ride home, as he liked to emphasise — you excuse yourself to the bathroom for one final touch-up before concluding one of the most fun nights you’ve had in a while. 

you stand in front of the mirror, staring in awe at your reflection, unable to rid yourself of the most contagious smile you’ve ever worn. it looks like an accessory, given how brightly it dazzles. 

how does he do it?

how does he spread so much goodness?

you smile at yourself through the mirror, rewinding the events of the night. your mind seems to enjoy replaying all the encoded images of heeseung’s expressions in your mind — him grinning, him frustrated by dancing, him embarrassed and mortified when his mother told you about the time he cried for 48 hours when he accidentally stepped on one of his ants from his ant farm.

“i love your dress.” 

you blink, eyes flickering across the mirror, just to notice the girl standing two sinks beside you. you squint, unable to recall when another person had entered the bathroom. as you stare longer, you then realise that it’s his cousin kim minjeong, who is also a student at your school. truthfully, you hadn’t expected they were related at all, though heeseung had sheepishly admitted that she had begged him not to tell anyone anything in fear of her social reputation.

you curtly smile at her in response, though she stares right back at you through the mirror.

“the green really suits your skin tone. was it a coincidence to match with heeseung’s bowtie?”

you smile affectionately, thinking about how adorably surprised he looked when you rocked up in a dress you had specifically matched with his chosen bowtie.

“yeah.” you laugh briefly, amused by the memory. “i thought it’d look cool.”

“it’s hot.” minjeong giggles, reaching into the depths of her purse to extract lipstick from it. while she reapplies the colour onto her lips, she continues to blabber. “by the way, isn’t my cousin such a loser?” she laughs, adjusting how her bangs sit on her forehead. “my friends recently found out that we’re related. fuck, so embarrassing. literally wanted to dig my own grave.”

“why?” you furrow your brows, though you desperately attempt to conceal your disdain.

she snorts. “what do you mean why? he’s a dweeb, duh. but like, i guess at least you’re giving him a little more social cred now that you’re hanging out with him.”

you feel an unpleasant taste in your mouth as you begin to outwardly frown.

“it’s so embarrassing being related to him. you know what my friends said when they found out? they told me his virginity was genetic and that i was going to die alone because they thought it must run in the family. fuck, honestly, i couldn’t even get mad. even taehyun sai—” she freezes when she realises the name she’s just uttered.

you stare at her emotionlessly, understanding the reason for her silence — it was eventually inevitable that the rumours had circulated back to you — minjeong was taehyun’s new girlfriend. sure, you and taehyun had never been dating in the first place, but you were his longest fling to date, and this was a well-known fact in school. 

“um… yeah. nevermind.” she stifles a giggle.

this was the reason why you had been so taken aback that minjeong and heeseung share blood; the girl is intolerable. she could not make it any clearer that she wanted you to know about her and taehyun, though what she probably doesn’t anticipate is that you couldn’t care less about their new relationship. 

“it’s cool.” you shrug nonchalantly. “i really don’t care.”

“wow, you’re so chill.” minjeong smiles, though it edges a smirk. “got any tips?”

“tips?”

“yeah, tips for dating him. tips for making him happy.” 

you already want to throw your head back and project a loud cackle into the sky. is she purposely trying to annoy you? if she weren’t heeseung’s family, you’d have already demolished her, though you practise self-control given that you’re at a family junction. “i don’t know, be hot? that generally makes him pretty happy.” 

her jaw goes slack at your implication while you narrow your eyes. you’ve never been one people dared to pick fights with, so you’re sure to emphasise precisely why. “and another piece of advice, don’t go around bragging about taehyun. he’s a parasite and not a flex, so you’re better off just waving around a sign that says i’m a fucking moron.”

it’s courtesy that you don’t mention the fact that taehyun has been blowing up your phone — in your absence, he’s sent countless text messages and attempted many phone calls. in fact, you were doing minjeong a favour by reminding her that gold-covered shit is still, surprise surprise, shit.

.

.

.

the ride home, you decide to stay silent about what had happened with minjeong, though you’re sure heeseung had noticed her storm out of the bathroom. 

instead, you let comfortable silence engulf the two of you while you lean your head against the window and watch your surroundings blur and blend like a speedy movie edit. heeseung drives well and the drive is long, so you even have the opportunity to shut your eyes and capture fragments of sleep. 

when he gently wakes you up and announces the arrival outside your home, you turn your head and slowly seat yourself upward. 

“jeez. sorry i slept,” you grumble, shaking your head as you brush the hair away from your face.

the boy profusely shakes his head. “no worries!” he smiles. “i’m an exceptional driver.”

“evidently. i slept like a baby.”

“yep, you literally had your thumb in your mouth and everything, too.” he jests. you giggle before reaching over your knees to collect your coat and your handbag. 

“in all seriousness, thank you so much for inviting me. i had a really, really great time.” you showcase your best smile, one which you liked to reserve for moments like these.

“s-sure.” he stutters, brushing his hair with his fingers. “thank you for agreeing to come. did i.. um… tell you how pretty you looked?”

“repeatedly.” you bite back a smile when his face falls into a horrified expression.

“oh.” he mumbles, blinking. “o-okay.”

you want to reach over and grab his face. he’s so cute. he’s too cute; he’s so precious and you want to shield him from the world. however, again practising your self-control, you opt for unbuckling your seatbelt and waving at him. “i’ll see you at school.”

“w-wait—”

you halt, a hand hovering over the door handle. “hm?”

“can… can i do something a bit stupid?”

you nod.

“can i…”

hug you?

kiss you?

“consider this my first real date?”

you hold your breath, frozen to your core — you fear that if you move, for even just a fraction of an inch — you will shatter this daydream and be dragged back to reality; one that most accurately mirrors cinderella’s tale.

you’re afraid you’ve struck midnight.

“o-of course.” you whisper back. 

his face is swept up with a smile. “dress well, smell well, compliment her, and—” he quickly checks his wristwatch. “a little over four hours, but that’s okay, right?”

“wh-what?” you blink.

“your rules for a good first date. how did i do?”

you stare speechlessly, eyes bouncing between each of his, unable to comprehend his words.

“i think your silence is a yes,” he mumbles. “but i also don’t care too much what you think, because i had fun and my date was pretty.”

and that’s when you realise that while you’re a sunset, heeseung is a sunrise. 

the kind of sunrise that rises in during dawn; one that touches everything around it with a golden glow and brightens any room to the standards of heaven.

he makes everything around him glow. 

even you.

he makes even you feel like you can glow.

//

to be continued.

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a/n: OMG HELLOOO BFFS im saurry for yet again another late update 💔 pls don't cancel me,,, im 2 slow at this game 😔 but BUT thank you SO much for reading hehe i will definitely try to update much earlier for the next chapter 🥰 SO??? HOW DID LITTLE HEE DO??? GIVE HIM SOME CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK 😫 also please nobody talk ab the fact that the writing here is absolutely DOG SHITE im screaming crying this was just not it but im.... too smooth brain to edit rn 🙁 but nevertheless seriously thank u sm for all the support for triage so far :((( i cant wait for the next few chaps grrrrr anyway MUAHHH LOVE U GUYSSS sm <33 pls do support me via liking + reblogging if u can !! :> ill try be quicker w the next update !!!