#taegeun — ♫ threads

[beheechul]

ʙʀɪɴɢ ɪᴛ ᴏɴ

for @bexktaegeun

heechul felt like he looked like a mess. his costume had so much going on that he wished he had gone with something more simple. instead he had to go for a character that wore something overly complicated. at least it was one of the less out their ones but he still felt off. he didn't wear the wig that came with the costume decided that his dark, short hair fit just fine for the costume. hopefully he doesn't end up with anything missing.

he had sent a text to tae that he hopes he sees since they were going to enjoy the rides together. maybe they could figure things out as well but heechul would have to push for it. maybe a part of him was selfish and wanted to keep his best friend to himself but he had a hard time voicing it. he lets out a sigh as he looks around, hoping to see tae.

once spotting the other, he gives a big smile and waves him over. "Look at you. Glad you dressed up so I wasn't the only one." he laughed a bit. "Ready to ride a few rides with me? We can go on as many as possible until we get bored." he wasn't sure what else they'd do after this but he didn't mind as long as he got to be beside his best friend.

[beheechul]

"i mean that would be a hilarious thing to do." heechul didn't think he'd have the patience to write that many letters even if it was serious. his hands feel like their hurting just at the thought.

a laugh left his lips upon hearing tae's words. "maybe but i'd make sure to take care of you if you got hurt." he knows cartwheels take skill and he applauds anyone who can do them. he knows he can't so he never even tries to do them. he can't help the warm smile that spreads across his lips as he lets his hands run through tae's hair. he doesn't mind them being close like this and always craves it even if he shies away a bit.

he missed this though and loved that tae decided to rest against his lap. "i mean, that might get you far. some companies even after a rejection love seeing how ambitious you are." he said mused, hoping his words were reassuring. "i would be happy with that. crossing my fingers that it will happen for us."

"what if we write a bunch of letters? it'd go a long way to show our sincerity." though, that was mainly a joke and it wasn't as if tae would do it. maybe. possibly. if he had any idea that it would actually work, he wouldn't wait to do it.

then he tried to be a bit more causal. it wasn't as if he wasn't already affectionate and cuddly with heechul. "you'd only want see me doing a cartwheel so you can laugh when i fail." tae found himself laughing. while he wasn't the most laziest person in the world, he was sure he wouldn't be able to pull off a great cartwheel. he'd fall flat on his face first. but it did give him a chance. an opening. tae found himself heaving an long sigh, resting his head on heechul's shoulders before he just went for it and laid his head on heechul's lap, getting comfortable as he looked up at the other.

it wasn't as if they hadn't been this close before and he missed it. "i can't either but at least i'd be able to show them i have ambition but i'm also not sure how far that would get me….." he trailed off, lost looking at the other for a second. "well as long as we can join the same company, even debut in the same group. i'd be happy."

[beheechul]

ꜱᴏɴɢ ᴡʀɪᴛᴛᴇɴ ᴇᴀꜱɪʟʏ

for @bexktaegeun

heechul hadn't been in the best mood and he was sure it had to deal with not seeing his best friend. at every chance he tried to make plans, it seemed that taegeun never had time for him. he didn't know what he had did wrong but just wanted to be around the other again. it was like he lost another part of him that didn't sit right with him at all.

now he was here at waterbomb alone, wandering around and enjoying the festivities as best as he could. he didn't wanna look like he was moping or showing others not to come near him. this was meant for fun which he wanted to have even by himself. Once at one of the food stands to order something, he hears a voice that is all too familiar.

turning his head, his eyes widen once seeing taegeun here with other people. he had told him that he wasn't going but it seem that was a lie. he was going to get to the bottom of this. no one of this dancing around each other. he makes a beeline towards the other male, a frown on his face. he taps him on the shoulder, crossing his arms instantly when he sees his face. "so, couldn't make it huh? we need to talk now." he spoke sternly, reaching out to pull the other male with him somewhere more quiet.

[beheechul]

"yeah? wanna keep that for later to listen back to?" he chuckled a bit though he didn't blame tae at all for doing so. he had a few things he was carrying but it was mostly for his mom and certain friends. "i mean i could use more if i want to spend it at home. i don't have any plans at all really. you want to spend time with me tae?" he can't help but ask at the end since he wanted to be beside the other male. he didn't want to go back home at all if he could help it plus being beside the other male sounded much nicer. he always enjoyed being beside tae no matter what and spending the holiday with him sounded nice.

he smiled brightly, ignoring the way his cheeks burned. "yeah? i'm glad you think that way about me." he felt the same way about tae but he knew the other male was number one for him. he wasn't afraid to admit it but didn't say a word. not yet at least. "you know i'll spoil you too. it is an answer! unless you wanna get me something relating to art as well." he wasn't too picky with what others gifted him and he knew whatever his best friend decided on, he'd love. "nothing really. i didn't really sit down to plan anything after this."

"ah, heechul calling me smart. next time...make sure i have my phone out so i can record it." tae had doubled back to pick up a basket. he did look like a kid in the toy store, the way added things to his cart that caught his eye for even a moment. "do you need to get anymore decorations? do you have any plans...anything i can help with?" he was curious, what would heechul do for the holiday? he didn't want to push himself into the others plans but he didn't want to be alone. well, he didn't want to be lonely. he was sure he'd still find himself lonely if he wasn't with heechul in some way. even for a bit.

tae grinned, giving the other a wink. "of course! i have to spoil one of the most important people in my life." would give himself away if he said heechul was his most important person? he bumped into heechul lightly, hanging onto the other. "one, you need to spoil me too and two, that's not really an answer." what if he just brought him one of everything. "what are your plans after shopping?" maybe he could get a meal out of him.

[beheechul]

the thought of doing something a bit more past the line of friendship was tempting. he wanted to hold hands or even just rest his head against the other's shoulder. he already gave him plenty of fond gazes but maybe he should do more instead of just waiting for the right moment.

"nope, we have to keep trying." he smiles a bit as he looked at tae. "we will. we'll show them that we deserve to be apart of the company." he didn't know when he'd get to audition again but he would be ready when the chance came. "i mean it was just the first thing i thought of." he liked playing guitar so maybe he'd have to do something else. he could showcase more if possible since he did dance a bit. "i mean i feel anything you try would be great." he mused, knowing he was biased when it came to tae. "i find it cool you did a mix yourself." he knew his best friend was talented and it just made him hope he got to do more. he let himself lean back against tae more, keeping his hand in the same place as he gave him rubbed his hand against him in a soothing manner. "hmm, i'd probably try to dance inside of just sitting with a guitar. maybe they wanted to see that instead." he wasn't a horrible dancer but it wasn't what he focused on most. "i mean, i'd accept you with seeing a cartwheel."

"that would be impressive. don't think i could keep seventeen languages in my mind." he laughed a bit.

if he had enough courage, he'd reach out and lock hands. that didn't happen. he didn't have enough courage and this was also the real world. instead, he just soaked in the little touch, a feeling he could return too whenever he wanted.

"no, we can't give up." he took a second to focus on heechul's words. "we'll get them next time." he'd keep trying. as long as he knew he had a friend in it with him. "maybe i should've tried that." he didn't audition with any instruments. "i did a remix of darling's irony...." and it didn't seem like they were too impressed with him. "a mix i made myself but alas...." tae trailed off, leaning on heechul more. this was normal right? "if you get a chance to audition again, what would you do next? i might learn how to do a cartwheel off the way, they'd have to accept me then right?"

it was out there but maybe he needed to be out there. "or if i learn seventeen more languages by my next audition and i do an entire song switching between them."

[beheechul]

"i might be. should i praise you more." heechul found himself laughing a bit as he looked at tae. this felt nice and didn't feel like they how things were before. "i can do that. i like getting to compliment you." he wanted to keep telling tae all the nice things possible since he adored the other a ton.

"i mean i could do that. i'll have to come to your place after i get up." it sounded appealing honestly. he was excited for the ride and keep glancing towards the front to see them getting closer. he had some ideas but he pushed them aside for the time being.

he couldn't help the way he felt about the other and wanted nothing more than just to be beside him all the time. it was what his heart wanted and he usually followed what it told him at the end of the day and he felt it would be the right choice when it came to tae. he felt himself smile a bit when the other back hugged him and he just let him do so.

"yeah? i always be sure to. i would never tire of you. i always wanna be near you tae."

"you know i can never get enough praise, are you trying to butter me up for something?" tae cocked his head to the side, clearly joking but he wouldn't mess up the chance to tease the other. "am i about to find you're an international spy? either way, keep the compliments coming." if all he heard from heechul were sweet things, he'd take it in a heart beat.

"hmm how so? gonna roll me out of bed every morning?" they finally made it to the line, it wasn't too long but tae counted them lucky. a large group had arrived just seconds behind them and he'd hate to be behind that. he also wouldn't mind rolling out of bed with him but he pinned that thought.

the words caused him to smile, willing away a flush. the other had no idea how much that warmed his heart and hurt him at the same time. heechul was a good friend, it was silly to avoid him for that time that he did. the line inched forever and he pushed the along, going for a back hug to hide the emotion on his face.

"and i'd be the luckiest person ever if you did....but you'd get tired of me soon enough and toss me out of the nearest window."

[beheechul]

heechul knew that they both were meant for each other but he never spoke those thoughts out loud. maybe he should start doing so and things would change. he didn't like hiding anything from tae even his feelings. "of course. feel we always have." he laughed a bit but instantly found himself resting a hand against tae as he kept him close.

"yeah it does. we're both lost out on a chance but neither of us should give up at all. you think so?" heechul hadn't expected tae to say that and it made his cheeks burn instantly. if anything, it just made his feelings for the other deepen. "studio delta just feels like the one. others we both could get used to but they don't feel like the perfect fit." he enjoyed all the groups at each company but he was focusing on what he did for school that he knew would help him with being an idol. "i auditioned with a song by the rose and even played it on my guitar. it was nerve wracking. i tried my best to keep my eyes on the people watching the audition but i wanted to look everywhere else."

if he wasn't holding onto his thoughts, he'd admit that they were perfect for each other. it's not like they were dating or he'd bring it up but if they were, it'd be much easier to be together if they were in the same company. "i'm just glad we have the same taste." everything was so perfect. even if it wasn't. a small frown worked it's way it's way onto his face and leaned over, dropping his weight on heechul.

"that sucks, i'll admit. it sort of feels good that i wouldn't have to get over it if you got in and i didn't. but they also lost out on an amazing trainee." he was sure there were dozen's of good trainee's but tae liked to think that heechul was a little more special than the rest. "i think i could fit myself into the other companies but like you...studio delta...i think it's the best fit for me." that and his ultimate idols were under the company. "what did you audition with? what was like it for you? i don't get nervous often but i could only stare at the wall behind the panel's head."

[beheechul]

maybe his own fears were getting to him. he adored tae a ton and wanted the chance to be by his side forever. the distance hurt which was why he confronted his best friend in the first place. would he confess? who knows. if he thought he'd lose the other, then he might. at least having the feelings out there was better than holding onto them, at least in his mind.

listening intently, he could feel many emotions hitting him and he knew his face wasn't concealing any of it. "ah... i see." sure he got people doing that but something about it stung a bit in a way he didn't like feeling. "so you're not having casual encounters anymore with this someone?" he didn't know why he asked that at all. his mouth moved before he could stop himself. "lonely? that's why you have me though... i like being beside you. there's never a dull moment when we're together... at least that's how i feel." he knew that tae felt sorry but he couldn't help telling the other what he felt. he always did.

"i'm glad you did though even with that... it stings a bit. my heart doesn't like it..." he muttered, locking eyes with tae before he finds himself admiring his face. he missed his face and getting to study every detail of it just had him itching to draw his best friend when he got back home. "good. feel like i haven't eaten since i got here. nope, didn't do much really besides looking at merch." he wasn't sure what he believe but he wanted to dig deeper. there had to be more or his feeling were just messing with him at this point. he was unsure and didn't care in the end. he was gonna let his heart feel what it wanted at this point.

he had been given enough time to come up with an excuse. well, it wasn't really excuse but was enough. something solid enough for tae to hold onto. when it came to heechul, he couldn't give a vague story. his friend would be able to poke holes in it without trying much. but he could talk about his life with a few little twist here and there.

just a few.

"that's my fault, all on me." he rushed to say, not wanting heechul to feel bad. it really was his fault. tae cleared his throat, looking away from heechul to the people they passed as they walked. "i haven't been really truthful. i've been...not seeing someone but..." he trailed off, a light flush on his face. "causal encounters with someone and i got a little swept up in but..." it was going to come to an end. seeing heechul in person after a while hit a little harder than he expected. he'd just have to deal with the pain. "but it came crashing down in these past few days, so i've just been...being a lonely guy. they really did drag me out, showed up to the house and everything." just a little twisting.

"but i should've told you...it just happened fast..." tae said, trailing off as he finally found heechul's face again. "chicken it is! like i said, whatever you want and can catch up. hopefully, you haven't had as such a wild time as me." and he hopped heechul accepted it, whatever the fall out from what was? he could deal with it? being rejected? no, he'd rather take it all to the grave.

[beheechul]

heechul knew that even with everything going on, he'd have to confess eventually. he couldn't keep it all bottled in forever. that wouldn't feel right in his mind. "you're welcome and you did well on making something fun." he smiled more before a laugh left his lips at the other's antics.

"oh, i know you can be." he mock rolled his eyes before giving a fond smile towards tae. "i mean i could help in some ways." if it meant he'd get to be around the other more again, heechul was all for it. "forever is a long time, tae. though, i wouldn't mind taking care of you in some ways..." he muttered, his cheeks burning some.

"sounds good to me and i'll be on the look out for them. i'm sure it will be a good time over all though."

it was worth all of the anguish to the smile on heechul's face. if he managed to push all of the heavy stuff away, it was like the old times. the times before he realized his own feelings. "thank you, i worked hard on something fun." he even paired the sentence with a slight mock bow.

"there is only one issue with your plan. i can be extremely lazy." he patted heechul on the back before locking their arms. "you'll just have do it for me." he did make that resolve, no more pushing heechul away. he'd just have to deal with it. "i'm actually, like a baby. you have to do it all for me. you'll have to take care of me forever." he tried to make it as scary and daunting as he could, not wistful.

"they have one called the french revolution, let's do the first but we'll have to be careful of any surprise guillotines."

[beheechul]

heechul willingly went along with tae, not minding when the other pulled him around. "that's a smart idea plus you can find many different ones online as well." plus he was sure getting a tree delivered was better than carrying it around as they shopped. "true and there are many decorations you can find around. sure you'll find some amazing ones, tae." he was already looking forward to seeing the other's tree all decorated once it arrived.

heechul couldn't help but chuckle a bit as he looked at his best friend. "you just like spoiling me. i like anything you wanna get me." though he knew that his best friend just wanted to make sure since heechul knew he could have specific tastes at times. he laughed again at the other's actions before smiling brightly. "i hope it is. i just assume since other shops are open that it would be. i'm sure you'd buy the right thing tae. i trust you."

as they spoke, tae had spotted one store and he pulled heechul along. it didn't look too busy and it was the perfect place to start. in his eyes at least. "you are right about not loosing things, maybe i'll order the tree online." that would free up his hands and it was a tad more practical. "either way, i'll figure it out. i'm not too fussed about the tree as much as i want some decorations." it wasn't like he'd have presents under it.

as they walked into the store he playfully rolled his eyes. "you know i'm going to get you something but aside from what i already have planned...i want to get you something you'd like." that way, he could still have his own special little surprise. "your wish, my command." he gave a mock bow, reaching out to pick up a small gingerbread house. "if the place is still open...we can go after we shop. i want to go with you to buy it in person. that we can make sure i buy the right thing."

[beheechul]

while heechul could be pretty straightforward, he didn't always catch little things. it made him seem oblivious but he was too focused on other things to notice subtle changes at times. he just wanted to know what was going on with tae. anything to have the other beside him again instead of feeling like they were growing apart. he didn't like this feeling and knew deep down he held onto feelings of his own that he didn't know how to go about sharing with his best friend. he just felt a bit alone right now which wasn't a feeling he enjoyed.

looking at him intently, he gave a nod still unsure. "oh is that so? it just felt off lately since i haven't seen you in awhile..." he let him know, biting at his lip some. he didn't mind the other being with friends but it just didn't feel that way to him and he wanted to change things. all he wanted was to have things the way they were again.

"i wouldn't mind that with you." he just wanted to spend time with tae and even if things were off, he'd accept this as well as get to the bottom of things. feeling the other's around him, he felt himself blush some as he wanted to nuzzle against his best friend. he stopped himself though, not wanting to be too obvious with his feelings. "can we get chicken then? it's the one thing i've wanted since being here..."

heechul was fairly direct. that was something tae knew. he knew it very well. it was the main reason he had avoided any direct contact with heechul. it was easier to give an excuse through text, it was much harder to keep that up in person. it was so much harder when he could see the disappointment in heechul's face. still, knowing all of that, he hadn't come prepared with an answer. an excuse. he had one sure but it wasn't one he wanted to share. not right now, not ever possibly. but he had to say something.

he knew he could be quick on his feet, he had to be. tae found himself slowing to a halt. "n-never." something, he needed something. "just wanted to give you a chance to meet everyone but they can do without us for a bit." he couldn't get out of conversation but he could make up an excuse. he just needed to keep the conversation while he bullshitted his way out of the mess he created.

"we can grab something to eat and walk around, that was the plan anyway...maybe it's good they dragged me out." he wanted to create a bit of distance, just calm himself but that would bring up more questions. instead, he kept his arm hooked around heechul, "whatever you want...lets eat until we get sick."

[beheechul]

even with everything that happened at waterbomb, heechul appreciated that he got to spend time with tae more. he would have been so hurt if he didn't get hear from him again. his own feelings were sitting at the tip of his tongue, ready to spill at any chance. he stopped himself though. he didn't need to ruin things due to his own feelings, at least not today.

he couldn't help but smile at tae's words before letting himself take in the other's costume. "you did good as well. i do like your jack costume." everyone had a different take with the character and maybe he was biased but he enjoyed seeing tae in this costume. "you think? maybe art helped me. yeah? i think you could do amazing if you wanted to up your game."

he felt his heart flutter a bit as he kept his gaze on tae. "hmm, let's go try one of the coasters." heechul smiled, already eager to see how the rest of their night would go. maybe if everything kept going this way, he'd get the courage to tell tae exactly what he was thinking.

avoiding heechul hadn't been an option since waterbomb. as much as he didn't want to accidently blurt out his feelings, pushing his friend away was even worse. at best, tae forced himself not to think about anything but enjoying the time they spent together. he could wallow when he got back to his room. tae had just responded to heechul when he saw the other.

he took a moment to take him in. dressing up had the benefit of allowing him to stare for a few minutes without it being weird. "you did a good job, i chose to go with jack skeleton...." any reason to dress up in a new suit and have some fun face paint. "i think you out-did me though, i suddenly feel like i need to step my game up."

a light joke followed with him linking his arms with heechul. "which ride do you want to go on first, your wish is my command." if heechul wanted to ride until they were bored, tae would make sure it happened.

[beheechul]

looking over at tae, heechul had a look over curiosity over his features. he didn't mind their more comfortable hangouts at all and it just let him get the chance to enjoy being beside his best friend without anything else in the way. "hmm. i had been undecided before since i didn't know if i wanted to be in a company but i feel i'm leaning towards studio delta. feel they fit for what i like doing more." his love of producing music as well as playing instruments was something that he felt would fit in more at studio delta than at the other two companies.

"oh? i auditioned there as well and didn't get it." he knew he could have shared after everything was said and done. he hadn't though and even just thought it was a fleeting memory but hearing that tae auditioned there as well just made him feel happy. "aww, that does suck but i'm sure you could get into any company you try for." he knew his friends skills were good and any company would love to have him. "i'd go for studio delta again. i wanna up my skills and try for them again. i feel i wouldn't fit in with the other two companies at all."

"it's sort of a random thought." well, not random for him but it would be random for heechul. maybe. he paused the movie he and heechul were in the middle of. they hadn't actually finished it yet but it was one of those more comfortable hang-outs. silence or scrolling until there was a topic they both wanted to talk about. "well, i have sort of a random thought, what company would you want to get into?" he knew they both had the dream of becoming an idol but he never really asked. it was a sort segeway, anyway.

"i think enough time has passed so i'm allowed to tell but i auditioned for studio delta and failed." it had been hard keeping the audition a secret and then he didn't want to talk about his failure. "i think it stung a little more because they told me to try out for another label so now i think i'm dead-set on joining." unless his desire to debut won out. "but, thinking about you…do you have a company you want or should i just take any opportunity?"

@beheechul

[beheechul]

heechul's eyes stayed trained on tae as he heard him talk. did he believe this? he trusted the other male a lot but he hated how much distance there was between them now. he was so used to having the other by his side that it just felt off to him. this wasn't how he wanted to spend waterbomb and he was determined to spend it alongside tae in some way if he could help it though they'd have to talk and stop with whatever was going on. heechul wanted to get to the bottom of all this.

his eyes widened a bit at the sudden hug. he was used to this with tae but it had been awhile so it took him by surprise. it just felt nice being this close even if he found tae's behavior a bit off. he didn't try to escape but couldn't stop the frown that spread across his face. this wasn't his plan at all. he sensed that tae wouldn't talk in front of the others which was why he tried to get him alone. maybe he'd get to figure out a way since all he wanted was the other beside him again and he didn't care how it was done.

letting out a sigh, he looks over tae as if he was trying to read his thoughts. "do you not want to talk alone with me?" he asked genuinely, feeling it would eat away at him if he didn't say something.

he was having a pretty good time, until he took a moment to go through his text. then his mood turned a little sour and tae had no one to blame but himself. it wasn't as if truly wanted to cut heechul out of his life but he simply didn't see another way. he loved his best friend, he was in love with his best friend and he had no plans of confessing. his actual plan was quite the opposite. he planned to ween himself from heechul, how could he get over him if he was always around the other man? yes, it meant getting rid of his other half but it was better that way, safer.

it still sucked and he had to shove his phone back into his pocket, letting out a sigh. he took a few moments to collect himself but managed to paint a smile back on as he re-joined his newest waterbomb group.

a smile that vanished the moment he heard, no saw heechul facing him with his arms crossed. honestly, he was thankful he didn't have to speak right away with heechul pulling him along. it gave him time to think of something to say. by the time they managed to make it to quieter spot, he was ready. he didn't give heechul a moment to speak before he launched into his hastily prepared spill. "i wasn't going to go out by wonpil, my friend from..." well, how did he meet the other boy again? at a party. "well, he begged, i mean...tears in his eyes begged. and i felt bad, so i came out...just to show my face for a bit until his friends came...then i planned on returning home." for good measure, he pulled heechul into a huge, ignoring the way his heart raced, he used to be able to hug him normally. "i'm glad you came out still, i didn't think to call you because it was so last minute. have i introduced you to wonpil? i should. lets go." he kept one arm slung around the boy, ready to guide him back to the festivities.

[beheechul]

"i like the sound of that plan." heechul chuckled, looking over at tae briefly. "i mean that's a good limit. we don't need to lose anything accidentally. a small tree would be nice at your place." he knew that would be what he'd get himself for his own apartment. he didn't need anything too big and all it was going to do was sit and look nice. "that's true and it would make everything festive." he said as he nodded in agreement.

"they really don't." there's decorations everywhere possible and he can see the booths that people have set up to sell whatever possible. there's also the gift shops as well and he can only imagine what he'd be able to find for his mother this year. "i don't mind that at all. planning on buying me something? always too sweet tae." he mused as he thought carefully. he could be super basic with his response or go with something he felt he needed. "well, i've been eyeing one of those cool keyboards that come with those different dials and switches for music production. just never had the chance to get one.

"the plan is to shop until we drop." tae grinned, nudging heechul. "well as much as we can carry, i wonder if i could get a small tree." he hadn't planned on decorating his apartment but the festive season managed to wiggle it's way into his heart. that also meant going out with his favorite person in the world. "i don't think a huge one would work out but something decorative." he didn't plan on having presents under it.

"lotte...they never fail to go all out huh?" the entire place was full of festive cheer. "i was thinking of hitting the gift shops first, i should find a few easy things over there...by the way, what do you want for Christmas?" he had already started working on his own gift for heechul but he wanted to get something heechul wanted as well. "whatever you want! name it!"

@beheechul