#susano is the only being more all-caps than kleskizhae so he gets the all caps

[krahka]

Kleskizhae and Yangir, incredibly loud and painful high five.

Here it is, the dumbasses. Extremely mild and possibly misleading Stormblood spoilers?

The first time Susano was summoned, Yangir was at the ready to take the Lord of Revels on, but Kleskizhae was off skulking around Zenos’s airship, living in the vents, taking advantage of the full-face cover of the standard Imperial uniform and occasionally emerging to challenge the crown prince to a duel. 

The second time they were both in Kugane, so they should have been able to fight Him together. Kleskizhae was writing a few songs for the Mujizoka theater, but Yangir had been arrested for “trespassing and vandalism.” The vandalism was a mistake, and maybe instead of plating their roofs in gold that would get ruined when someone stepped on them and then complain when inevitably someone stepped on them, they could just not do that. When Kleskizhae came for their bail or to break them out, the Sekiseigumi chased him out because of the last time he busted someone out of jail. It was just the one time, and it was Hildibrand’s idea, but telling them that only seemed to make them angrier. So he had to fight Susano without them.

It kept happening, to the point where Susano Himself wondered why His two favorites never seemed to be fighting Him together. He was tired of them being the only ones who seemed happy to see Him, and as Kleskizhae protested that he was never happy to see an eikon, Susano unsummoned Himself until His two “FAVORED WARRIOR SOULS, MOST JOYOUS AND FIERCE” were together to fight Him again. That was probably something that the more scholarly members of the Scions would be interested to hear, but despite whatever implications that had, it wasn’t as if the two of them hadn’t talked about how they needed to fight primals together more often anyway. 

It wasn’t long before they chartered a boat to the Isle of Zekki, where the Red Kojin put up only a token resistance. They knew they were only warm ups for the main event. Once they busted into the sacred vault, Susano was already there to greet them.

“WELCOME, TREASURED GUESTS! I SEE YOU ARE UNITED IN PURPOSE AND JOY! TALL ONE!” the primal bellowed at Kleskizhae. “WILT THOU SING FOR US ONCE MORE?”

As much as he’d protest in public about how Susano was a threat to Othard, and the very world, he was also weak to flattery, and if Susano liked his singing, he couldn’t help but like that too. 

“Indeed I shall, oh Commander of the Waves! I have composed a song for this very occasion, in which…”

‘It’s about how we’re gonna kick Your ass!” Yangir said, clutching their spear in glee.

“Exactly as my boon companion said. ‘Tis a song about kicking Your ass.”

Susano laughed, and ear-splitting thunder followed. ‘EXCELLENT! FULL GLAD ARE WE THAT YOU HAVE COME PREPARED TO PARTY! THIS SHALL BE A CELEBRATION FOR THE AGES!”

He raised his enormous sword, in case either of the Warriors of Light had forgotten what the kami’s idea of a celebration was, and Kleskizhae was quick with his glowing Allagan-tech shield to intercept it before it crushed them all like insects.

Under the strain of holding back Ame-no-Murakumo, Kleskizhae began to sing.

“Oh great Lord of Revels, we are here to kick Thine ass..”

“YES!” Susano bellowed, applying more pressure to Kleskizhae’s shield. “YES!”

While the primal was distracted by His sheer delight, Yangir lept into action, their spear glinting with the reflection of the lightning that was suddenly everywhere. They jumped through the storm gales to attach themself to His armor by the spear, screaming and kicking all the while. They pierced His shoulder, and Susano let out a yell that nearly left Yangir deaf as He swatted them off. Kleskizhae moved in to catch Yangir, and they landed on his shield, ready to jump even further this time. 

“Betcha I can knock off His helmet,” Yangir whispered to Kleskizhae.

“Oooh would that even kill him?” Kleskizhae whispered back, dodging another wave with Yangir perched atop his shield.

“Let’s find out!” Yangir jumped up as Kleskizhae pushed them into the air at Susano’s head. They flew through the air, catching on fire and laughing as they rammed straight through Susano’s head, knocking it clean off. The helmet fell to the ground with a clang, empty of anything but aether. Susano paused His assault to pick it back up, and He laughed. 

“INCREDIBLE WORK, MY COURAGEOUS SOULS! A MOST EXCELLENT CLASH! I THANK YOU! SHOULD YOU HAVE YOUR SONG TO US WRITTEN DOWN, PLEASE LEAVE IT HERE, SO THAT MY FOLLOWERS CAN SING IT FOR ME!” 

The enormous primal bowed to the two and as the skies cleared, His armor clattered to the ground, empty of the animating kami until such a time when the Kojin summoned Him again.

They took a moment to catch their breaths. They were soaking wet, and Kleskizhae’s magitech shield was sparking a bit from the damage it sustained keeping Susano’s sacred sword at bay. Once they had stopped panting, they started laughing.

“That was great!” Yangir raised their hands to high-five Kleskizhae.

Kleskizhae was still a bit jumpy, but he still met their gauntleted hand with his own gauntleted hand, and the metal audibly clanged.

“Ow!” Yangir recoiled at the slightly too forceful high five.

“Damnation!” Kleskizhae cried out, shaking his hand.

Upon realizing what happened, they laughed, the adrenaline coming off and everything seeming ridiculous.

“Hmmm. I did have a song written out, but I ended up improvising. Not that I ought to be leaving offerings for eikons, but still. He asked so politely.”

“Maybe you can have them ready next time. There is going to be a next time, right?”

“Of course not. The Kojin will realize the folly of summoning eventually. Or they’ll run out of crystals. Or something.”

“But if there is a next time?”

“Well yes. Obviously we’ll fight Him together.”

They high-fived again. It went about as badly as the last one.