#surprise I’m a NICU nurse

[waywardnewcomer]

I love this, as a 9-1-1 fan and a NICU nurse. It’s portrayed really well and parents often feel like they’re losing a limb when they leave their babies with us. But we encourage parents to be there as much as possible.

Just for notes because I know a lot of people are asking for more (but you can always message if you have questions) 25 weekers are often a lot smaller around 1.5-2lbs, and are often on the ventilator for a week or so, then extubated to a machine called CPAP/high flow (although some babies manage on CPAP from birth once treated with some surfactant to help with oxygenation and lung compliance), we encourage early feeding as much as possible through an NGT/OGT but some babies are slow to tolerate because of immature guts so they are fed through their veins with something called TPN. We usually get access through the umbilical cord for the first 7 days and then something called a long line to use while we build up feeds and help them gain weight. (we do use scalp cannulas as a last resort!) We always promote breast milk is best for any baby but particularly premature babies as their guts don’t tolerate digesting formula, so if mums are struggling we use donor breast milk until around 34 weeks when we transition to a preterm formula. We encourage expressing from birth and aim to give colostrum (usually less than 0.5mls) within 6 hours as it’s a personalised medicine for the babies gut! We don’t usually feed properly until we have a good supply but give all that we do have, it takes 3-4 days for milk to actually come in and with stress milk supply is less anyway. We always aim for due date as their going home date, but wouldn’t be allowed to go home before 34-35 weeks as that is when they can start to feed orally. We encourage as much skin to skin as possible - it helps both baby and parents so much, regulates breathing, heart rate, temperature, pain, hormones, milk supply in mums and helps bonding! We try as much as we can to allow delivery room cuddles depending on how stable the baby is, and once on the unit as long as baby is stable on the vent get them out for cuddles!! We use an incubator cover until 34 weeks because their eyes aren’t well adjusted to lights and it helps with reducing the sound in the incubator.

Extreme prems below 26 weeks often have a big setback when around 30-32 weeks, being needing more breathing support, getting an infection, getting NEC (a bowel infection which can be deadly) or having problems with a PDA (heart defect where a duct stayed open after birth because of a failure to switch to normal circulation - they usually close on their own with time but can cause problems with breathing, we usually treat with paracetamol).

Prems are little tiny fighters and it’s such a privilege to care for them and their families on a daily basis. I think a series like this would be so cute! I love your writing style a lot and I’m a long time stalker so please don’t think I’m criticising! Just want to give you some more info (or a lot sorry) for if you want to write more! But my inbox is always open if you do and need some help!

Tiny Little Fighter

As promised, this is my new Evan Buckley imagine. Please let me know what you think.

If anyone would want it, I'm debating about making this into a little series. Let me know.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @shauna-carsley @dottirose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1

Evan Buckley Masterlist

Summary: After Evan and (Y/n) have their baby very early, Evan won't leave them alone in the NICU. He stays alongside his baby, making sure they're okay.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't wanna do this." The look in (Y/n)'s eyes absolutely broke Evan's heart. If people could die of heartbreak, he knew this is the pain that it began with. He knew he was on the verge of a heart attack with how distraught his wife was and the fact that there was nothing he could do to make this any better.

His lips smothered the top of her head and his hands shakily ran up and down her back as he tucked her closer to his chest. Each shaky breath he took against her hair made Evan's chest tighten and tighten until he was barely breathing at all, just gasping and panting against the top of her head.

"I know, baby. I know."

What else could he say? What else could Evan do other than stand here and hold her broken pieces together and try to keep himself in one piece? How could he do this when they were both pieces of a puzzle, starting to fall apart?

His back tensed and he leaned forward when (Y/n) bent her knees and pushed down like she was trying to make them both kneel on the floor. He felt her nose push against his sternum as she buried her face in his chest and groaned. She choked on a scream when another contration split through her pelvis and made her want to hunker down on the floor.

This was too early.

They weren't supposed to be in the maternity ward right now. (Y/n) wasn't supposed to be over halfway through labour right now. Not when she was barely twenty five weeks pregnant.

They had another eleven weeks left, bare minimum, until they should have to think about labour. They had another fifteen weeks until their actual due date. But here they were, waiting for this to be over with to see if their baby would be able to survive being born this early.

They didn't have any other choice.

Not when (Y/n) had developed pre-eclampsia which had gotten to the point that her blood was starting to shred and her liver was shutting down. If they didn't have the baby now and (Y/n)'s liver gave way, that would be it for her and for the baby. The only way for her body to be able to recover and get back to normal was for the baby to be born. This was her body's way of reacting to the baby.

It was affecting her liver which was on the verge of shutting down, her blood was starting to shred itself and (Y/n) had already been given a blood transfusion to try and keep her going. It was affecting her vision and now the baby was getting distressed.

Inducing labour was the only chance they had of (Y/n) recovering and of trying to take care of their baby.

"I think you're ready now. Let's sit you on the bed."

(Y/n) shook off the midwife's hands but when she tilted her head back and looked up at Evan through teary, spotty vision, she nodded. She didn't want anyone's hands on her but her husband. She only wanted his help. (Y/n) knew none of this was the midwife's fault or the hospital or the doctors. It wasn't her fault either, no matter how badly her brain was trying to tell her that she was doing this to herself.

But she didn't want their help. Their touch. Their comforting words that sounded cynical and condescending to (Y/n). All she wanted was Evan.

"Don't let me go," (Y/n) almost pleaded as she grabbed Evan's hand when he carefully eased her back down onto the bed rather than standing with her in his arms. She wanted him as close as she could get him and more so. He had to be right next to her, he had to be touching her somehow. (Y/n) wanted to feel his breaths mingling with hers and his touch on her skin.

Evan’s eyes softened and with the tears welling around his blue orbs, they looked like they were beginning to melt. He nodded and pulled the seat closer to the bed until his knees pushed uncomfortably into the edge of the bed. His hand stayed curled in hers and he moved his other hand to rub up and down her arm while the midwife got ready to assess her.

She said nothing as the midwife put a heartbeat monitoring clip on her finger and two more to her stomach to monitor the baby’s heartbeat. She tipped her head back into the pillow, wanting to smile when she felt Evan bring the back of her hand to his lips.

"I'd say you're dilated now. You can begin to push on the next contraction," The midwife's voice had an air of caution and sympathy in her tone because she could see her words made (Y/n) cry harder.

She didn't want to be doing this. Labour had barely been induced for four hours and already (Y/n) was ready to evict her baby.

Her baby wasn't going to be able to survive on their own. They wouldn't be able to breathe or regulate their temperature or feed properly at this stage. None of their organs would be developed enough to survive outside the womb. They would need to be in the ICU for weeks if they were going to survive this.

Silence fell over the three of them, save for the few sniffs and tears here and there, as they waited for the next contraction to hit. Evan tipped his head down and pressed his lips to (Y/n)'s arm as they waited, his hands holding hers tightly. When the next contraction came, (Y/n) pushed but stopped at the sound of one of the monitors. All their heads seemed to snap to check which monitor it was to know whose heart was now in distress. (Y/n) wondered for a moment if it was her own heart that was becoming frazzled due to how it seemed to flutter in her chest before beating harshly.

But it wasn’t her heart, it was the baby’s.

“What’s happening?” Evan questioned, absentmindedly tightening his hand around (Y/n)’s as he moved his free hand to press to her stomach. His eyes narrowed as he looked at the monitor that showed their baby's heartbeat which was suddenly slower than it was before the contraction.

“Baby is just a bit stressed, that's all. The heartbeat should stabilise in a minute.” The midwife responded as she watched the monitor showing the baby’s heartbeat and waited for it to pick back up. All of them sighed in utter relief when it started to mellow and go back to the rhythmic beat it had been a moment ago.

They knew the moment the baby was born, their heartbeat would fluctuate again and become uneven. Once they realised they were no longer in the womb and would have to breathe on their own, the baby would be in complete distress.

Evan turned his head back to look at the midwife when (Y/n)’s hands tightened around his own signalling she was having another contraction. He cringed when (Y/n) started pushing and her scream rebounded through his ears and made a shiver run down his spine. But he felt relieved that the monitor didn't scream out this time, the baby seemed stable. For now.

(Y/n) cried out when another contraction hit and pushed to sit forward with her chin tucked down into her chest.

She pulled Evan's hand up until she could press it against her chest and her eyes followed him as he got up from the chair and moved to stand as close as he could to the edge of the bed. He leaned over, curling his left arm around her shoulders while he pressed his lips to her temple.

She could feel Evan mumbling "It's gonna be okay," into her hair and the words were soothing, even if she didn't quite believe them.

Part of Evan wanted to let go of (Y/n)'s hand and move down to feather his fingers across her stomach instead. She didn't look like she was five and a half months along.

He had been so, so happy when (Y/n)'s bumps finally started to show and he could feel the baby kicking. Whenever they laid in bed, Evan had a hand constantly glued to her stomach and he was forever talking to the baby and kissing her tummy and waiting for movement. He thought he would have another three months of that.

Evan thought he would get to spend the next three months marvelling at how (Y/n)'s body changed and telling her how much he loved her expanding stomach. Not anymore. Something akin to a knife twinged in Evan's gut at the notion that (Y/n)'s stomach wasn't going to get any bigger than this.

Their baby would no longer be connected to (Y/n).

Whenever their baby kicked or wriggled or squirmed, Evan would actually see them doing it. He wouldn't feel those movements anymore; neither would (Y/n). They would watch a tiny, miniscule baby wriggling and fighting to stay alive; if they made t through this labour.

"Okay, the head's born now, well done. Take a breather, you're doing great."

Part of (Y/n) was desperate to smile when she watched Evan lean over her stomach as soon as the midwife spoke. He kept hold of her hand and his other hand stayed on her shoulder, but he leaned down to look at their baby.

Evan had delivered a few babies after years of being a fireman and nothing really shocked him anymore. But this was different. That was his own little baby, his own child that was coming into the world and there wasn't a sight that would ever match that. Seeing any other woman give birth was never going to make Evan's heart clench or send his stomach rocketing like this.

That was his baby. That was his tiny little fighter.

They shouldn't be that small. They shouldn't be that wrinkled. Labour shouldn't be going this fast or be this swift. Their baby shouldn't be born so small Evan feared they weren't going to fit in the palm of his hand.

He didn't realise he was crying again until he felt (Y/n)'s trembling hand reach up and her thumb swiped away the tear from his cheek. Tears of sorrow, more than joy, because this wasn't a joyous moment. It should have been. This should have been a day where Evan's ADHD had him bouncing off the walls with excitement. He should have been flying through the roof, anticipating the birth of his first child.

He couldn't find the will to be happy about this when this early meant his baby might not survive.

He hadn't even told anyone yet.

Evan thought that when (Y/n) went into labour, he would have everything sorted. He would have the maternity bag packed, the nursery sorted. He would call Maddie, then Bobby, then Eddie, right in that order to tell them all. Then he would call them as soon as the baby was born and ask them to come over.

The only person who knew (Y/n) was in labour was Maddie. She knew because she had been here just this morning to see (Y/n). And she had born witness to (Y/n)'s scream and Evan's breakdown when they were told they needed to induce labour now, for both their sakes. Maddie had gone home, anxiously cradling her phone to await any news and she hadn't told anyone. She couldn't. It felt like overstepping the mark.

But what would Evan say if this didn't go well? What was he going to do if he lost his baby? He couldn't tell that to anyone over the phone, but he wouldn't want them to witness him having a breakdown if he had to tell them face to face.

"That's it, push again (Y/n),"

"You're almost there, keep going sweetheart," Evan nudged his nose against (Y/n)'s and pecked her lips before he moved round a little. He perched down on the side of the bed just behind her and leaned across so (Y/n) could lean her back against his chest. His arms cocooned around her waist and his fingers stayed oddly still against her stomach.

(Y/n) had never known him be so still in such a moment of unease and unknowing like this. She thought his hands would constantly be jittering and his foot would be tapping on the floor and his knees would be jerking up and down. But the only movement she could feel was him kissing the top of her head.

Tears tracked down (Y/n)'s face and she felt like she was on fire when she heard the midwife say that the shoulders were born. Then the arms.

It felt like she was being electrocuted and like her legs had been burned off at the thighs when all the weight was suddenly pulled down from her stomach. And she knew. She just knew that was it. She'd had their baby; they were no longer connected. Their baby was no longer safe and protected with (Y/n), they were fending for themselves now.

Her body slumped back into Evan and she couldn't hear whatever he said, even though she could feel his lips moving against her neck and his voice vibrated against her skin. His arms tightened around her waist in a comforting, broken hug as he held her tightly to his chest and started to sway them side to side.

Her shaking hands moved up to hold onto Evan's forearms that grounded her and kept her calm when she felt like she was about to disappear. She let her head flop back on his shoulder and her wet lips smothered his neck as her nails punctured into his arms.

It took (Y/n) a moment to realise that another midwife had already bustled into the room and both of them were tending to the baby laid between her legs.

"A-are they okay? Are they breathing?" Each word came out through a bubbling sob and (Y/n) was surprised any of them could make out a word she was saying.

But she hadn't heard a cry.

Tears streamed freely down her face as she clutched Evan's arms to her chest, letting him sway them from side to side to try and calm them both down. He had his chin digging into her shoulder and his lips against her neck, but (Y/n) could feel him crying against her skin.

"It's a boy."

"Is he okay?" Evan persisted when they didn't exactly receive an answer. She could be trying to calm them down, trying to tell them as dearly as she could that they had a boy, but he wasn't alive anymore. They had to know.

"We've got a pulse."

That was enough. That was more than enough. He might not be breathing or wriggling or kicking and they might not be able to hold him yet, but he had a heartbeat. That was all he needed so far. As long as the midwives could get him intubated and get him into the ICU, a heartbeat was what they needed to start with. That would do for now, that was enough right now.

"Would dad like to cut the cord?" The second midwife was leaning over the end of the bed and she looked over at Evan with something tender in her eyes. It almost made him wonder if she had been in this position before, if she herself had experienced a premature baby. The look in her eyes made Evan feel like they could relate to her.

When Evan looked down at her, (Y/n) nodded and managed to unlock her viper grip on his arm to let him move. She would be okay if he let her go, just for a little while. She felt him lean her forward before he gently sat her back against the pillows so he could shakily move round to the end of the bed.

His fingers briefly skimmed across (Y/n)'s ankle and up the back of her leg before he took the medical scissors from the midwife and tried to stop himself from shaking. She held the cord up where she had clamped it off and Evan cut it just like he had done at least three times before when he was on shift. But this was so much more intense, this was his little boy.

As soon as the cord was cut, Evan was left shaking, barely breathing as he leant over the end of the bed. His eyes glued to their initial midwife as she stole the baby from the bed and moved over to the incubator in the corner of the room. Evan knew in a minute or two, once his boy was breathing, he would be taken from them.

They wouldn't get to hold him, cuddle him or even touch him before he would be shipped off to the neonatal unit and a doctor would be assessing him.

Shivers bolted up and down (Y/n)'s legs which had previously felt numb until she felt Evan's fingers curling around the back of her ankle. He gave a little tug before his wide eyes were staring at her with a mix of emotions she could decipher.

(Y/n) shook her head, silently asking him what was on his mind because although she could usually read her husband like a book, in this moment, she had no idea what was going through his head.

"He- he's got a birthmark too." Evan's voice was so calm and quiet that it almost didn't sound real.

(Y/n) watched the way Evan let go of her leg so he could pat his cheek, indicating where he had seen the little patch of discoloured skin on their baby's cheek. Before his head was turning back towards the midwife, watching her intently as he started to shake, fuelling back up with adrenaline.

Part of Evan had been worried in the beginning. He worried that their baby would get lost or mixed up and switched. That the midwife would forget which one was his little baby or they would put the wrong nametag around his ankle or his little wrist.

If they didn't get to see their baby first, Evan wondered how they would know which one was their little baby and worry that the midwives might forget too. But that mark was an indicator.

It meant that Evan didn't have to panic about following the midwife like a shadow or keep his baby within his sights at all times. He would know which tiny, fragile baby was his.

(Y/n) swallowed harshly as she watched the midwife scribble Baby Buckley onto a wrist tag, along with the date and time of his birth.

They didn't even have a name for him yet. They thought they had another three months to come up with their favourite, agreed upon names for a girl or a boy. Now he was here and they didn't know what to call him. He was just going to be Baby Buckley until they could think of something suitable.

His birth had come so early that none of them were prepared for him.

***

(Y/n) could feel tears welling up in her eyes when there was a soft knock on the door and she looked to see who was walking in. She nodded and motioned for them to step inside when she realised it was Bobby and Athena.

Her eyes traced them up and down before locking on the small black duffle bag in Bobby's hand that she vaguely recognised.

"How are you doing?"

She reached up and looked her arms around Bobby's neck when he leaned down to hug her. And she did her best to force away the tears before they soaked into his shirt, not that she thought he would mind at all if she began to cry again.

"I'm okay." She thought she was. She hoped she was. (Y/n) couldn't comprehend many thoughts, feelings or emotions other than feeling disconnected.

It felt like she had been disconnected from the world, from her baby and from every emotional part of herself. All she wanted to do was sit and cry or try to sleep and pretend none of this was happening. The selfish part of her mind wondered why this couldn't have happened to someone else. Why did it have to be her and Evan? What had they done to deserve this?

"We brought you both some clothes from home, we thought you might need a few things." Bobby set the bag down in the corner of the room before he sat down in the chair beside the bed.

His eyes watched his wife as she took (Y/n)'s hand and perched down beside her on the bed.

Since Evan joined the station, they had become surrogate parents to him, and when he married (Y/n), she became another child to them. They didn't want to see either of them going through something like this and if there was anything they could do to help, then they would.

"Where's Buck?" Athena took a quick glance in the corner of the room, but the adjoining bathroom was empty meaning Evan wasn't in there.

Something soft washed over (Y/n)'s face as she brushed away the tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. She sniffed and tried to smile, giving Athena's hand a light squeeze as she sat up a bit straighter.

"He followed the midwife down to the neonatal unit last night… they uh, they couldn't get him to leave, so they had to let him stay. I think he spent the night in there."

(Y/n) had been more than a little surprised when the midwife came back to check on her late into the night and realised Evan wasn't with her. (Y/n) wasn't worried. She knew exactly where her husband had gone and why he hadn't come back yet. He was under the impression that if someone wasn't watching over their boy, something bad would happen to him.

Nothing they said would get Evan to move last night so after they gave up, one of the nurses had draped a blanket around him when he fell asleep next to the incubator.

He had come back to see (Y/n) this morning and make sure she was okay before heading back down. He knew (Y/n) would be down soon and neither of them would be moving very far away from their boy.

The only reason (Y/n) wasn't there now was because of all the IVs she had been on and the nurses monitoring her. They were making sure her liver function was picking back up, taking constant blood samples to check and to make sure her blood was returning to a healthy state and taking enough oxygen. Being separated from her baby really had made (Y/n) feel better, despite how it had ruined her, mentally.

"And how is the little guy?"

Bobby had shed a few tears early this morning when he had been in the middle of cooking breakfast and suddenly got a phone call from Evan. He hadn't expected to have Evan crying down the phone, saying (Y/n) had given birth already and now he had a little boy.

As soon as he told them, Athena and Bobby were getting ready to come down here and make sure both of them were okay.

Bobby knew Eddie and Chris would be coming down this afternoon after Chris finished school. And Hen and Karen said they would give it a few days before they came to visit, while Chimney and Maddie would be here almost every day at some point.

"He's okay, they got him stable on a ventilator and a feeding tube… they said he's stable at the moment."

It had been lovely that the nurses kept coming in every hour or so to give (Y/n) an update until she could go and see her little boy. They told her how well he was doing, how he settled almost straight away when they got him all hooked up to the ventilator and monitors. He seemed to be very settled and stable at the moment and that was all that they could ask for.

And (Y/n) was desperate to go down and see him.

Tiredness ebbed away in the corners of Evan's eyes and at the back of his mind, but he tried to push it to one side and ignore it.

His head tilted to one side and the first hint of a smile began to form on his lips when he looked down. His left arm curved and bent over the top of the incubator while he bent his left leg forward and stretched his other leg out behind him to keep himself supported. His upper body leaned forward and he leaned his head down until his nose was almost touching the plastic separating him from his little boy.

For what had to be the tenth time this morning, Evan carefully slid his right hand through the small circular opening in the side of the incubator.

His fingers skimmed across his little boy's chest, just a small, delicate touch that was barely there. Evan couldn't find it in himself to be comforted by the feeling of his little boy breathing steadily like this. Not when he knew it was the machine that was making him breathe.

As soon as that tube was removed from his nose and he was breathing on his own, Evan knew he would feel a lot better.

He leaned his cheek on his left arm and trailed his fingers higher until they brushed the newborn's cheek that was so soft but wrinkled that it made Evan shiver.

He wasn't sure he'd ever seen a premature baby this small or this close up in person. Sure, he'd seen a few pictures from friends or people on calls who said they'd experienced something like this. But Evan had never touched a baby so small and early on like this.

It was strange.

It was unnerving to think that if he put both hands in the incubator, his son would barely fit in the palm of his hands. He only weighed three pounds. Evan had never seen a baby so small and lightweight. He was like a doll.

"It'll be better when you're out of here, you know. That nurse said in a few days, maybe a week, we can hold you. I'm starting to get desperate," Evan managed a smile as he trailed his hand back down towards the newborn's hand that was clenched into a tiny fist.

He brushed his thumb against the back of his hand and tried to be careful as he delicately unfolded his fingers. Evan's fingertip barely fit against his son's palm but he refused to let go or flinch or squirm away. This was his boy, his baby, and he wanted some sort of contact.

Evan wanted him to know that someone was with him and watching over him.

He knew realistically that it didn't make much difference. This incubator was here to make his boy feel like he was back in the womb and to get him to grow and develop. He wasn't going to know or care if someone was watching over him or if his dad was keeping an eye on him or not. But it comforted Evan to know that someone was with his son. It comforted him to be able to touch his newborn and show him that he wasn't on his own.

He stroked his thumb against the back of his hand, noting how his son's skin was like sandpaper. A bit gritty, somewhat coarse and extremely fragile. If Evan applied too much pressure he might break his skin.

"But you have to stay in here for a while."

Evan didn't like this. He had imagined the moment he and (Y/n) had their baby, so many times. And not once did Evan consider the thought of having to have their baby prematurely like this. He thought once their boy was born, they would hold him straight away, get some pictures and just spend the day with him in their arms.

He didn't think he would be separated by a plastic box and wires and tubes or see his baby wear the smallest version of a nappy that the hospital had, specifically provided for premature babies.

Evan never thought about having to wait possibly weeks until his baby would be healthy and strong enough to breathe on his own and feed without a tube going straight into his stomach. He didn't think he would have to bide his time and wait until he could hold him for the first time.

And Evan knew for definite that until his boy was in his arms, he wasn't moving from this spot. Evan wasn't leaving this hospital for more than an hour to get something to eat or get a change of clothes. He was staying right here, watching over his boy.

"I can start telling people now, about you. I told grandad Bobby, and auntie Maddie this morning. And uncle Eddie. It's strange, being a dad, now that you're already here."

It still wasn't sinking in properly that this was real.

He couldn't quite get his head round the fact that he could now call himself a dad. He could tell people he had a baby boy. This little life right here, that wouldn't fit in his hands, was already alive and here.

Evan was responsible for this precious life that he was afraid he was going to lose.

This was his boy. This was the little person he was going to be cradling at night and settling to sleep and feeding and washing and dressing him up and taking him down to the station to proudly show him off. When he was better, of course.

"I wish I could take you out of this. I just wanna take you home with me and mummy." As he spoke, Evan's fingers twitched and pressed a little harder into the small fist he was cradling.

He was desperate. He felt like a bank robber plotting some great heist. He wanted to snatch his son and take him home and make a remedy to rectify all of this. If he could change things, he would. Evan would keep (Y/n) and their baby safe and take them home and change this so they had him when it was safe to do so. He wanted his little boy in his arms. He wanted him cuddled up into his chest and snuggled against his bare skin and held as close as he could get him.

Evan wanted his boy to know what a cuddle felt like. He wanted to be able to give him a kiss and hold him and let him know how much he was loved already.

"God, I- I haven't even got your crib ready yet." Tilting his head up, Evan moved his free hand and dragged it across his face and down his jaw.

He hadn't got anything set up.

They had barely started to buy clothes and blankets and bottles. And the crib was still flat-packed in the corner of the nursery that wasn't even painted or decorated yet. They hadn't done any of that. They thought they had another ten to fifteen weeks left before their baby would of made an appearance.

Statistically speaking, Evan knew he still had quite a few weeks left until he could take his baby home. He had four, maybe five or more weeks of visiting his boy in here. And when he and (Y/n) weren't here at the hospital, they were going to be decorating because being home without their baby would drive them insane.

Evan could see it now. By this time next week, the nursery would be finished and they would have everything ready in anticipation of taking this little bundle back home with them.

"You weren't meant to arrive this early, you know. I thought I had three months to get everything ready for you. I guess I'd better sort out the nursery soon, hm? Ready for when me and mummy bring you home."

He finally released the newborn's miniscule fist so he could drag his fingertips up and down his side like he was trying to tickle him.

Evan found it fascinating to look at the tiny nappy they put on his son. It didn't look right, being so small and compact and seeing such tiny legs sprouting out which only looked the length of Evan's index finger. And when his eyes trailed up to look at his son's small head, he was relieved that his boy now had a little lime green cap on to help keep him warm.

Evan didn't want anyone removing that cap. Not when he knew that was where the IV line had gone.

Evan had almost thrown up when he watched the nurse try and fail to find a suitable vein in his son's arms and she couldn't find one in his legs either which were like sand paper. She only found a good vein in the side of his head and Evan hated it. He hated seeing that needle puncture through his delicate skin and see the thin tube be taped to the side of his head so it wouldn't accidentally be torn out.

He was glad the cap covered the IV line which could only be seen popping out the end of the cap behind his tiny ear that was smaller than Evan's thumb.

"I'm not gonna leave you here alone, mister. I'll stay with you."

Just as he spoke, Evan felt a pair of arms circling around his waist and a familiar face pressing into his back just beneath his shoulder blades. His lips curved into a grin and he slowly slid his hand from the incubator so he could reach down and hold onto (Y/n)'s wrist.

"Hi baby, you okay?" He twisted his body so his left hip was pressing against the incubator, allowing him to weave his right arm around (Y/n)'s waist and tug her closer.

She happily tucked herself into his chest with her cheek pressing against his sternum so her eyes could focus on the incubator in front of them. The feeling of Evan's hand feathering up and down her hip and the feel of his lips against her temple faded out when (Y/n) looked at her little boy.

She hadn't managed to get a good look at him last night when he was born. But as she stared down at him, she realised Evan had been right this morning.

He was beautiful. He had a circular birth mark on his right cheek like a splotch of paint had been dropped onto him. His nose was tiny and rounded at the end, obscured only by the breathing tube taped into his nostril.

"Hm. How is he?"

"He's okay. The nurse will be back round soon to do some checks." Evan spoke against the top of (Y/n)'s head, breathing into her hair while he leaned back so she could slouch against his chest.

Tilting her head back, (Y/n) gently pressed her chin into Evan's chest so she could look up at him.

He had dark circles beneath his eyes and a hazy look in his pupils, showing off his desperate need for sleep. But the lazy smile on his lips was enough to make (Y/n)'s heart skip a beat and her stomach flood with adrenaline. She felt his hand move to run up and down her back while his left hand curled into a fist and propped his cheek up.

The way he slouched and grinned tiredly but endearingly made (Y/n) smile and attach her lips to his neck.

"You're gonna be living here for the next few weeks, aren't you?" Her words were soft and her tone was even softer, melting along the edges while she smiled against his skin and grazed her teeth dangerously close to his throat.

She could see it already. The nurses would all know Evan by next week. He would become part of the furniture, they would get used to him and weave around him to do their checks and daily tasks. They would have to stop Evan from intervening and trying to take over. They would be showing him how to change the tiny nappies and show him how they were feeding his boy and how they washed him while he was this small and tender.

Evan would become part of their routine, their staff team. Someone they couldn't avoid or get rid of, not until they discharged his son.

"Oh yes."

"Hm, good. Me too." (Y/n) nudged her nose against his jaw until Evan tilted his head down to meet her halfway in a kiss.

She kept her left arm looped around his torso but she stayed still and compliant as Evan held her right hand. He slowly moved her hand when their lips finally broke apart but stayed so close that (Y/n) could feel each breath he took like Evan was giving her his every ounce of oxygen.

Her eyes drifted to the side when Evan slid their joined hands through the small opening in the incubator and grazed her fingertips along their son's hand.

"Hear that? Me and mummy are staying here until we can take you home. We're not leaving without you."

[half-oz-eddie]

My OC! Nero Castiel Ramsay

TW for graphic depictions of violence, death, mass murder, suicidal thoughts (and angst!)

For context, the military has seized control of his country, killing, weaponizing and experimenting on people with abilities. After causing a horrific accident with his fire ability, he eventually meets a girl who went AWOL from the military, who took her away from her father as a child so they could use her as a weapon. The two team up to find out where their abilities came from and what the government has planned.

His full backstory is below the cut!

"My story? Well..." My name is Nero Castiel Ramsay. I’m 25 years old. I was born July 26th in Shrill City General Hospital. 

When I was born, I nearly blinded the midwife. They had to wrap my hands in foil gloves and give me cold baths. My temperature was nearly 200 degrees. 

My mother said the pregnancy was difficult. She always had hot flashes and indigestion, but at least labor and delivery was easy, right? 

When I was brought to NICU-II, my father had my files deleted and destroyed, which is an easy task when you're the hospital director.

None of the nurses really wanted to take care of me, let alone touch me, except Evander. It was a blessing to have an older brother that was a nurse. 

It was a blessing to have siblings that loved me the way they did...

When I was brought home, my family wasn’t nearly as ready as they thought they were. 

I was burning through mattresses in my sleep for the first 2 years of my life, until the fire was a bit more under control. It wasn’t as explosive anymore. 

For awhile, my family thought maybe...it went away. Until I would throw a tantrum and set my high chair ablaze. 

I was only a toddler, and yet, I still remember the horrified look on my mother’s face. 

After that, she was always dumping me on my father and my siblings. I hardly saw much of her. She’d peek into my room, say good morning or good night, and keep walking past.

Physical contact was never really happening before anyway. Vega used to put foil around her hands and arms to give me hugs or head pats, but I was a really unstable kid. 

I was constantly uneasy and had anxiety. If I was really upset, I’d burn through the foil too.

Vega was covered in burns from always trying to interact with me. She’d hold my hand when I was scared, until her hand was blistered. 

When I got a bit older, I convinced her to stop coddling me and just help me become stronger. 

She was 12 when I was 7, so she was teaching me whatever she was learning in school. My mother hardly did any homeschooling with me. I’m surprised I’m not stupid. 

Vega studied a lot of pyrotechnics. She told me to try lotion on my hands and body to keep it slick so I wouldn’t set anything on fire. The lotion worked a bit, but then my hands were still too warm to touch. 

So then, we tried gloves. I’d burn through them within a week or so, and then need replacements. 

Then...finally...we tried both. Vega kept a “burn chart” for me. And as long as I kept my hands lotioned every 3 hours and kept my gloves on, I was able to manage for an entire month without setting a single thing on fire. 

My body was still too warm, though. I tried going outside on the front porch, instead of just staying in the yard like always. 

I saw a baby, and I ran inside and had a panic attack. 

I imagined accidentally setting the baby on fire and I lost it. 

“I’m too dangerous.” I cried. 

Vega held me and tried her best to calm me down. She held and squeezed until it was too warm, too hot, burning. I burned her clothes onto her body. She was in so much pain. 

Luckily it wasn’t as bad as i thought it was. Mom, being a retired nurse herself, was able to tend to her wounds. 

“I told you, don’t touch Nero. I’m tired of seeing you covered in burns. What if he burns your face next? People will start asking questions!”

“I don’t care about questions! I care about my little brother. He’s 13 years old, and he has no friends. You won’t even let him go to church!”

“If I take him to church, everyone will just think he’s the devil.” My mother snapped. 

I overheard everything from the doorway. I ran out into the yard and climbed the big oak tree. It was at least 20 feet tall. 

I looked up at the moon, then down at the grass. I was getting ready to jump from the highest branch and kill myself. 

I heard Evander slide the back door open. “Nero, you out here? You want some pizza? I’m buying...Nero? Yo!”

I didn’t reply. I wanted him to go away so I could finally die. 

“Please don’t look up, Please don’t look up.” I told myself. 

He took out his phone, turned on the flashlight, and looked up.

Damn.

“Hey, get down! That’s dangerous.”

“I know. I was...just trying to get a view of the city.” I came up with a quick lie. 

“I told you, if you’re willing to take some pills, I’ll drive you around. Your fire seems to be triggered by your anxiety. And since we can’t take you to the doctors, I’ll get you a script for something.”

“I...I don’t know if that’ll work. I don’t know if anything will work...”

“Wait...are you trying to kill yourself?”

“No, it's just..I um...”

“Idiot. I’m coming up.”

Evander scaled the tree like a superhero and sat next to me. 

“This is really high up, Nero. You actually can see the city from here.”

I shrugged. “I’m not supposed to be alive. What if I really am the devil like mom said?”

“She said that?!”

I answered with an embarrassed nod.

“Nero. I’m so sorry, kid. I know that hurts, but I think you were born this way for a reason. You have to discover that reason. You won’t get answers from death.”

“Maybe.”

“You can get pizza though, and extra cheese if you get down.”

My brother always knew what to say. 

I decided to keep on living, and keep trying to be better. 

Vega convinced me to try finger painting to calm myself. 

I spent a lot of time in the backyard painting, imagining what the rest of the world was like. 

My father started taking some of my paintings around and sold them. He put money in a trust fund for me, so one day I could have a life of my own. 

Lots of people around the city wanted to meet me, but my father would lie and say I had a very serious autoimmune disease and couldn’t be around others. 

Really...I was the disease. 

“As the years had gone by, I was trying to get better, but I was just fucking up everyone’s life, honestly.”

“It wasn’t your fault.” His friend said comfortingly. 

“To me it was...”

Vega had declined a full ride scholarship to the top university in the country because she didn’t want to leave me. 

Evander was putting his life on hold. He was working per diem hours making below his salary because he considered me a priority. 

My mother just seemed pale and miserable. Our relationship was strained for such a long time, until I turned 17. 

I found it helpful to intentionally let out a little fire every once in awhile. I’d burn wood in the fire pit, and then started finger painting with soot. 

One day, my mom asked me to paint her. When I was finished, she smiled, then pulled a piece of foil out of her pocket, placed it on my forehead and kissed me over the foil. 

I cried a bit, after she took the canvas inside. Then, it started raining. I’ll never forget that day. It was one of the few good days of my life. 

I felt like things were going to start getting better.

I started going out front again. The neighbors wouldn’t stand too close, since they thought I was so susceptible to germs. But, they’d say hello. They were kind. 

I started painting out front. About a week in to my porch painting, I noticed a new family was moving into the house across the street. 

It was an older looking couple, older than my parents, a son around Vega’s age and a daughter around my age. 

God...she was beautiful. Short with long hair, a cute voice, even cuter laugh, warm green eyes. I wanted to...

“Fuck her?” His friend interrupted. 

Nero narrowed his eyes. “Paint her. I wanted to...paint her...and I did. A lot.”

When she made eye contact with me as she headed into their new house, I felt my heart skip a beat. 

Later that day, my family was heading over to do their neighborly welcoming committee bullshit...and of course, I stayed behind. 

I was staring at that girl through the window. 

“Want me to ask her name for you?” Vega said, startling me. 

“What? Are you fuckin crazy? I can’t talk to no girl.”

“Sure you can. You haven’t hurt me any more than I’ve let you. You can at least make a friend.”

I watched my family head over with a casserole and the father welcomed them into the house. 

They were in there for hours. I guess they were really nice. 

Later that evening, Vega came rushing into the house first. I was sitting at the table eating the food my mother cooked.

“Her name is Corinne. She asked about you. She wanted to know about ‘the boy whose eyes look like sunlight that was sitting on the porch.’ So I told her a million great things about you.” She smiled at me. 

I felt like I was going to be sick.

“Oooh you’re blushing!” She gushed. “So her name is Corinne Baker. She’s your age. She wants to be a veterinarian, she likes to sing, she was a Girl Scout, and her family moved here from Senkil because her father got some fancy schmancy corporate job offer.”

“She uh...sounds nice.”

“Her whole family is really nice. The brother seems pretty shifty, though. Call it my gut.”

I shrugged off what Vega was talking about. I knew getting close to anybody was a terrible idea. 

The next day, I was back to my front yard painting, when Corinne came outside. I tried to stay hyper focused on my newest piece, but I noticed out the corner of my eye, she was coming closer. 

“Hello!” She called out from the driveway. “I’m Corinne. You’re Nero, right?”

“Uh...yeah. Nice to...meet you.” I hoped she wouldn’t come closer.

She didn’t. She’d come back everyday, stand in the driveway, and ask about my paintings. We’d exchange idle small talk. She’d tell me about something funny at school, or her homework. I liked seeing her every afternoon after school, and in the mid-morning on weekends. 

One day, she decided to ask vague questions about my health. 

“I’m not contagious, you know. Is that why you stand so far away?”

“N-no! I didn’t think that...I just...was worried I could get you sick. I-I go to school a-and I-I—“

I laughed. “I’m just messing with you.” 

I started getting comfortable with her.

“You can come a little bit closer. You know. So you can see what I’m painting.”

She slowly ascended the steps, and stayed a few feet away from me. My heart was fluttering. 

“It smells like smoke.”

“I paint with soot, that’s why.” 

I smelled like soot, and she smelled like flowers. We were like life and death. 

One day, she came by during a thunderstorm. I wasn’t expecting to see her. I wasn’t even painting that day. I just liked rain. It was the only time I could be comfortable outside. 

“Why’d you come today? It’s pouring!”

“I come see you everyday!”

I sat in the grass, and she plopped down near me. 

“You’re gonna get dirty. You’re...too pretty to be covered in dirt.”

“I love the rain.”

“Me too.”

We sat a few feet apart, and she revealed something really personal to me.

“Really? What’d she say?”

“I’m omitting that part.”

“What?! Why?”

“I’d never tell another woman’s business. What kinda man do you think I am? Anyway...”

I asked her if I could paint her. I worked on it for months. I never let her peek, no matter how many times she came back. 

I finished it toward the end of the school year.

“It's so, so beautiful! Can I take it with me? To college, I mean.”

“Oh...you’re going away to college?”

“Yeah, but I’ll come home for breaks. And we can video chat. Do you...have a phone?”

“No...”

“Please get one!” She begged with her eyes sparkling. 

“Um...okay.”

I knew damn well I couldn’t have a phone. It would fucking explode in my hand. 

But, of course, Vega had a plan.

“Here.” She said as she plopped a tablet onto my nightstand. “You can video call with Corinne. And it’s voice activated, so you don’t have to worry about blowing the shit to bits.”

“Um...thank you.”

Once Corinne was at university, she’d video call me all the time. 

To tell you the truth, I found it weird. I didn’t understand why she wanted to talk to me so much. She told her friends about me and everything. I guess it didn’t really occur to me that she liked me too. 

Over the years, she’d gotten a few inches closer to me whenever we sat together on the porch. 

I was getting older and controlling my fire much better than before. 

I was able to hug my sister and only feel a little warm. I couldn’t stop the fire from coming out of my hands, though. So I had to keep up my lotion and glove regimen. 

Fast forward to two years ago...

I was going out more often. I had even gotten a job at the mall kiosk. 

My boss was a good friend of my dad’s. So he told him I needed these bathroom breaks every 3 hours because of my condition. It worked. I was able to lotion my hands during my breaks and keep interacting with the customers.

Life was fantastic for once. 

6 months in to my job and nearly normal life, Corinne had moved back home for good. She was a college graduate and a veterinarian. 

“So, you seem to be doing better now. Can I...have a hug yet?”

I didn’t want to lose her. 

“Let’s...work up to that.”

She sat inches away from me. “Fair enough.”

We went to parks and beaches together all the time. One day, we went to a restaurant. 

“Is this a...date?”

“I...think so? I do like you. B-but it doesn’t have to be a date.”

“I want it to be a date.”

I liked Corinne so much, but I was so scared. What if I had to tell her about my abilities one day?

I walked her to her door, and said goodnight. 

“Nero! I don’t get a hug at least?”

“Uh...well. I’m really old fashioned. I don’t want to make any physical contact too soon. It uh...gives us time to work on the bond.”

She looked at me like I was a dumbass, but she went along with it...

For about 2 weeks.

One night, she video called me. 

“Nero. I have feelings for you. Deep feelings. I want to hold hands and kiss you. I know maybe you’re worried about your illness, but I promise I’m healthy, and your parents say you’ve gotten better. You haven’t been sick at all lately, right?”

“Uh...well I ha—“

“So, tomorrow! After you get off work. Meet me at the park across the street from the mall. I want to kiss you.”

“B-but—“

“Nero! We’re not kids anymore. I have needs too.”

“Needs...?”

“Yeah, like closeness. Physical touch...maybe...more?”

When she said more, I got nervous. The last time I thought about sex, I set my bed on fire—again. I tried to stay focused.

“Uh...okay. Let’s meet tomorrow.”

The next day, I went to work, nervous and uneasy. I didn’t know what would happen if I kissed her. 

To make my day even more stressful, my boss’s son was filling in for him. He wasn’t as understanding about my breaks. I asked to take my first one, and he groaned about how much I was needed since we were 1 person short. 

I was feeling the warmth underneath my gloves, between that and the thought of kissing Corinne, or seeing her naked...I felt nauseous. I wanted to touch her, but I didn’t want to hurt her.

I asked for my second break. Still a no. 

Now I was getting scared. I felt it coming. I knew if I set that kiosk on fire I was gonna GET fired. And have to lock myself in my house again. 

I asked for my third break...I fucking implored. 

“Please wait 20 more minutes Nero? Regular break time is around then. I really need you out here.”

I couldn’t think straight.

My gloves were getting hot.

I was supposed to kiss Corinne today.

My gloves were hot.

Corinne’s lips. 

I waited 10 more minutes, then asked if I could go home early. 

“Seriously, Nero? Just wait 10 damn minutes. I promise you can take an hour break, okay?”

My face was covered in sweat. The thoughts swarmed back again. The customers came in droves. My hands were shaking and I was breathing heavily. 

I tried to calm myself with happy thoughts of painting once my shift was over. Then, I started thinking of excuses to not kiss Corinne, and the customers were crowding and making so much noise, and my gloves were starting to burn.

Suddenly, I lost control. Flames flew from both of my hands and body at an unbelievable degree, charring through people and stores. I heard agonizing screams and saw people turning to ash, begging for mercy as their skin melted from them within moments. 

I heard brief shrieks as the flame ate away at them. 

I was horrified as I watched everything burn. It felt like hours but...it was probably 2 or 3 minutes. And for some disgusting reason, I was the only survivor. 

I ran like hell from the rubble...and kept running, and running...and running. I had no intention of seeing my family, or Corinne ever again.

I knew my family would resent me, and I knew I was too much of a monster for Corinne. I hid in an alley for 2 days until there was a thunderstorm. That was my sign that it was time to say goodbye forever.

“Then, I met Yuka in the Obsidian Forest and killed more people, this time soldiers, and this time on purpose. Then...wound up here.” Nero shrugged. “Your turn.”

[hischierdevils]

138 with Jamie drysdale!

- 138 “How are you this perfect?”

You’re high on pain killers when Jamie finally runs into the room, still wearing his Ducks warm ups. “Hey gorgeous, how are you feeling?” He kisses the top of your head as he sits on the edge of the hospital bed.

“Better now that you’re here.” You try to lean into him for a hug but wince from pain. Jamie helps you sit up comfortably before giving you another kiss. “Do you want to meet our baby?”

His eyes start to water as he nods and you hit the call button so the nurse can come in and help you into a wheel chair.

As she walks (pushes in your case) the two of you to the NICU, she fills Jamie in on the events of the day. A migraine had led you to an er visit where they determined your blood pressure was way too high and they sent you right up for an emergency c-section.

You were terrified, the two of you weren’t expecting the baby for another five weeks. None of your family was in town, including Jamie who was in Nashville for a game. It took you forever to get ahold of him and once you did, the only thing you said was that the nursery wasn’t ready.

Thankfully a nurse had taken the phone from you and explained the situation better than you could in your state. The Ducks got him on a flight immediately.

“How long does she have to stay in here?” Jamie asks the nurse as he holds your hand tightly at the door to the NICU.

“Once she’s up to five pounds she can leave the NICU. Besides being underweight, which is normal for a preemie, there are no other health concerns.” Jamie visibly relaxes from the news and drops your hand so he can pull a gown on.

Once you’re both suited up in the proper equipment, the nurse brings you in to see your baby. You’re not allowed to hold the baby yet but you can stick your hand in the side of the bassinet and hold their hand.

“We have a daughter?” Jamie looks between you and her in awe. Neither of you wanted to know the gender beforehand and your heart melts at his reaction. You were worried that he would want a boy.

“She’s just the sweetest thing. Everyone loves her. Do you have a name picked out?” The nurse asks you.

You share a look with Jamie. You had both agreed on a boy name but you were still undecided on a girls name, neither of you willing to compromise. “Magnolia Grace.” Jamie decides.

“Really?” You asked him, slightly surprised. That’s the name you wanted but he didn’t like.

“Yeah, it fits her perfectly.” He decides. He looks down at her again and you can tell he’s smiling by the way his eyes crinkle. “Hi Maggie. I’m your Dad.”

Maybe it’s all the hormones, or the pain killers, but you feel yourself falling more in love with him. “How are you this perfect?” You ask him.

“You’re the perfect one, baby.” He bends down to kiss you before realizing he can’t with the masks you both have on. “I love my girls so much.”

[lornrocks]

I know medical professionals are surprised when I say I hate needles because, you know, I’m inked and pierced up. But it’s VEINS I have a thing about. Or stuff going parallel under my skin. I’ve had so many intramuscular shots or like, lidocaine injected into my flesh that it’s whatever.

Idk why I got such a needle thing. Maybe it’s subconscious memory from being in nicu as a baby? They say maybe there’s some sort of muscle memory with that, that people who got a lot of pokes as newborns remember it in their bones. Idk if that’s true but lord almighty I still have nurses taking my BO being like “oh are you nervous” YES BECKY!! I AM!!

Who isn’t nervous when they’re about to go through unpleasant sometimes painful experiences? Who isn’t nervous about going under?

[ariadnes-red-thread]

TCW Hospital AU Headcanons

In honor of Nurses’ Week, and because I’ve been thinking about this since @abandoned-by-destiny told me about their Grey’s Anatomy AU, I’m posting my unrelated headcanons about the clones as healthcare workers.

*this isn’t Grey’s Anatomy/House/The Good Doctor. This is based on my experiences as a nurse so don’t be so surprised if it doesn’t fit the medical drama narrative (aka nurses/RTs exist). Also, prepare for my biases as a MICU nurse.

THE NURSES

Hardcase - ED nurse

Cut-up - ED Nurse

Boil - ED Nurse

Our chaotic men. If it’s messy but needs to be done, they’ll do it. They may seem carefree or even occasionally heartless but that’s called coping. They have the nastiest (and most fun) sense of humor and they are always up for whatever rolls through the door.

Waxer - NICU Nurse

Not even Hunter adopted a child faster. This man is a NICU nurse.

Echo- CTICU > Critical Care NP, Perfusionist, or CRNA

You want to play by the rules? Be an ICU nurse, and not just any ICU nurse. CTICU nurses are renowned for letting you know they’re CTICU nurses but that’s because they’re some of the most knowledgeable and focused healthcare workers out there. There’s not a damn thing about ECMO that Echo doesn’t know and I totally see him going on to get a second degree, either one that gives him a greater depth of knowledge or one that gives him more autonomy in his practice.

Fives - MICU

Being a MICU RN is kind of a Jack of all trades but master of none. Fives is disciplined enough to focus on the mission and passionate enough to care for the some of the sickest patients in the hospital. He’s also creative enough to figure out how to jerry-rig a decompression system from nasal trumpet or to make his finicky CRRT machine run, even on the most septic of patients.

Jesse -STICU

You want action? Jesse knows where to find your action. MVA, GSW, Fresh Liver Tx galore. It takes the leadership and determination that we all know Jesse has to care for these patients. He’s also stubborn enough to fight a surgeon.

***All of the ARCs also double as Resource/RRT Nurses, meaning if there’s a code or someone decompensating anywhere in the hospital, they’ll show up to help.

Hevy - Relief ICU Charge Nurse

Hevy doesn’t want the leadership role but he’ll take it on if he has too. One thing he’ll never do is let his fellow nurses drown.

Rex - ICU Charge Nurse

Rex had leadership thrust on him but he never shied away from it. He’ll fight an attending or a family member to protect his patients and his nurses. He’s got more critical care knowledge and experience than half of the doctors in any room and the attendings know that when Rex is speaking, they need to listen.

THE DOCTORS

Kix - Critical Care Fellow

Kix CARES. He’s always looking out for his men. He hasn’t been around long enough to be burnt out and he’s besties with all the nurses. He’s a wealth of knowledge and when it comes down to it, he’s the one you go to when your R2 is being a dick and he’s the one you want him around if your patients are dying

Tup - R1 leaning towards Critical Care or Emergency Medicine Specialty

Tup is a little green around the ears but he’s got guts and isn’t afraid to come up with a plan. He knows how to rely on those around him and is ready to jump right into the action

Gregor - Emergency Attending

The ED is a circus and Gregor is a ringleader. He thrives on the chaos of it and knows how to take whatever comes through the door in stride and with a tactical efficiency,

Cody - Pulm/MICU Attending

When it comes to the mission, Cody is no-nonsense. His vast knowledge and experience is humbling to work with and he’s always teaching something new to his residents. He knows the nursing staff and who he can rely on but when a code happens, he’s in charge. He’ll kick someone out of the room or cric a patient bedside without hesitation. He’s a fearless practitioner for a reason - because he’s smart enough and experienced enough to be - and it shows.

Wolffe - TACS or Anesthesia Attending

Sure from the outside, Wolffe seems rough. He’ll roll his eyes at a resident in rounds and if a nurse asks him for something he thinks is stupid, he’ll be sure to let them know. But at his core, he’s an experienced and talented provider, and if you can get through that outer shell and earn his respect, you’ve made an ally for life

Hunter - Interventional Radiologist

Radiology is an art. A misread scan can mean deadly mistakes but that’s something Hunter never has to worry about. He’s also skilled enough with a knife to preform delicate surgeries under fluoro

Wrecker - Orthopedic Surgeon

There’s a stereotype that Ortho is the specialty where all the pre-med athletes end up… and there’s some truth to that. Wrecker is passionate about strength and body mechanics so it only makes sense that would translate to his practice. Plus, if someone needs a joint repair or replacement, you want a doctor working on it who is precise enough to dismantle a bomb

OTHER ROLES

Tech - Lead Respiratory Therapist

If I’ve learned anything from being an ICU nurse, it’s that a good RT makes or breaks your care. Vents are complicated and having someone who knows their way around one can save your patient’s life. Tech has a way with technology and when you have that ARDS patient that’s ready to code but still needs a CT, you’re hoping he’s your RT.

Crosshair - Flight Nurse

Crosshair is a bit of a cowboy. He does things on his own and doesn’t like to be told what to do. That doesn’t always make for the best bedside manner or gentlest care and he’s okay with that. But he is resourceful and knows his shit. He will do anything he has to to make sure his patient lives from point a to point b.

The Dark Side

Palatine - CEO

Dooku - CFO

Krell - CNO

I will not be explaining these ones except to say fuck healthcare admin and fuck “Nurses’ Week”. Pay hospital staff appropriately instead of giving them stupid trinkets and childish appreciation weeks. Thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

[naoyaslut]

The Hills Final Chapter

pairings: fem reader x ran haitani

wordcount: 3.3k

twarnings: minor character (main character death),little fluff, babies, family stuff, breast milk mention, reader is lactating, breast milk ingestion,

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24

She was tiny.  She was not as small as you thought she’d be, but she was smaller than the average newborn child.  Obviously, she was “early”, but all that mattered was that she was safe and sound while she slept soundly against your bosom.   

Kai had been sleeping since you arrived in the NICU and one of the nurses pulled her from the incubator so that you could get some skin-to-skin time with her.  Being able to hold her in your arms soothed your fraying nerves. 

You were in your own little world admiring the babe, picking out the different features on her tiny face that obviously belonged to you and then the ones that belonged to Ran.  It was all surreal and it only caused a fluttering warmth to bloom in your chest making you feel... complete.  As if everything would be alright. 

It surprised you that the small baby was sleeping through the faint hum of the breast pump on the table beside you.  One of the nurses had asked if you were interested in breastfeeding... and to be honest you had never given it a solid thought.  

She suggested you try pumping to see if you were producing any milk at all. You were surprised to see that you were.  Once you collected enough the nurse said that she’d put it in a small bottle and let you feed the baby. 

Breastfeeding seemed to be a lot of work but for this little bean, for Kai, she was worth the effort.   

“I’ll transfer the milk over for you and then we can wake her up to feed her,” One of the NICU nurses happily blurted as she maneuvered around the room.  Asking questions here and there so early in the morning to make conversation as she continued through a few other tasks. 

She showed you how to change the baby’s diaper and gave you some basic information that was routine for all parents to receive after giving birth. 

“Will your husband be stopping by sometime this morning?”   

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise before you tore your eyes away from Kai repeating her question in your head.  Ran.  He was supposed to be here at some point this morning.  You were so enthralled with Kai that it hadn’t even crossed your mind. 

“He’s supposed to be here this morning, I’m sure he will show up soon,” you flashed her a smile as she pulled a sterile rubber nipple from its packaging and screwed it on the small bottle.  She walked towards the sink and rinsed the nipple under a stream of distilled water before handing it over to you. 

“Kai is probably too weak now to latch properly, but the longer she stays in the incubator she will become stronger, and she’ll be able to latch directly onto your nipple,” The nurse stated matter of factly before she stepped back to watch you nudge at Kai’s lips with the bottle. 

She stirred subtly letting out a tiny yawn before fixing her lips around the tip of the bottle. 

“Looks good Mrs. Haitani, I’ll give you some privacy, let me know if you need anything!”  

“Thank you, Nora,” Nora, the NICU nurse left the room and left you alone with the baby, your eyes trained on her as she suckled sweetly at the bottle.  She was eating hungrily, and you tipped the bottle up so that she wouldn’t swallow any air down.  

Kai was beautiful and the very essence of her brought a sad smile to your face.  You thought she was going back to sleep as she fed, those little eyelids of hers twitching as he guzzled down the milk from her bottle. 

Nuzzling her closer to your bosom you began to talk to her quietly and idly wondering if she had heard you crying so often during your shortened pregnancy. 

“Mommy is sorry if she startled you, I know she cried a lot... but I’m glad you’re here... safe and finally in my arms,”  

You were relieved, you were happy, you really were.  But again, you were on the verge of tears trying to understand what all of this meant.   Your heart was full but felt empty at the same time. 

“I’ll always be here to protect your little one...” Swallowing around the tightness that seemed to be forming in your throat, you mumbled once again.  “I think your daddy will too,” 

A few seconds of silence crept on until you heard the familiar drag of a tired voice behind you, one that you hadn’t expected right then. 

“Daddy huh? I could get used to hearing that,”  

Ran was standing in the doorway, dressed oddly casually in a pair of dark sweatpants and a matching jacket with a paper gown thrown over his clothes. He appeared to be freshly showered, his hair damp and combed back neatly with a flu mask tucked underneath his sharp jaw, and he was drying his hands off with a paper towel. 

His sudden appearance startled you into silence.  You almost didn’t recognize him.  You parted your lips to say something but instead settled for giving him a soft smile.  For once he looked refreshed and at ease, but you detected a bit of hesitance in his body language as he tossed the paper towel into an empty waste bin. 

He remained standing near the door with his hands tucked into the pockets of his sweats.  Ran’s bright eyes remained bolted on your face for a few moments before they settled on the tiny infant noisily suckling on the bottle that you held lightly at her mouth.   

He appeared to be frozen and the uneasiness that he felt was apparent on his face.   

“Ran...” you whispered, talking quietly as if your normal voice would wake to startle the child from her half-asleep half-awake state.  “Do you want to see her?” 

Ran seemed to relax if only minimally from his spot at the door and he hesitantly took a step towards you and baby Kai. 

“Can I?”  

You were blown away that he was even asking, asking if he could hold, let alone look at his own child.  

“Of course, you can,” you blurted out, a surprised chortle following your words as he began to cross the room.   

He knelt beside the chair you sat in and leaned towards you to hook his chin over your shoulder so his eyes fell on the baby.   

3 AM 

Naoto and his team waited patiently at a distance as they honed in on the docks in downtown Roppongi.  The port had been under surveillance for hours and yet there had been no activity other than the movement of shipment containers.  

There was no Bonten and there were no obvious movements that appeared to be gang-related.  The tip that Ivy had given him had to be bullshit.   

Naoto sucked in an annoyed groan lifting the binoculars back up to his eyes to see if anything had changed down below.  Nothing, there was nothing.  This circus, or lack thereof was going to get him taken off this case for good.  

“ Fuck…” Naoto was becoming frazzled, his anger beginning to get the best of him.  “She must have bailed too, Jesus, she played me.” 

It was obvious.  Naoto couldn’t even get Ivy on the line for the past couple of days.  The signal on her burner phone was nonexistent and the phone itself didn’t even ring, nor go to voicemail.  Now his informant was on the run and he had no idea where to look. 

Agent Vancouver dialed into Naoto’s cell phone and his voice shot over the phone line abruptly. 

“Tachibana, we’ve been surveying the area for over 24 hours, there’s nothing of substance here. If Bonten had something planned, they may have gotten wind of us being here, or your tip was a distraction, I’m calling this off.” 

Hesitantly Naoto agreed.  “I get it, I’ll have to regroup with my source… I had solid intel that they’d be here for that container,” 

“That won’t be necessary, our office will be pulling out as far as any support.  The head shed doesn’t want to waste any more resources on any of this Bonten crap until you have a solid lead,” 

Naoto groaned inwardly, his attention still on the docks as Vancouver gave him the news.  

“Understood,” 

The FBI withdrew and the help that Naoto received from RPD also began to retreat.  He was due back at the station first thing in the morning to debrief the commissioner of the failed attempt at capturing Bonten doing something illegal.   

Naoto remained behind walking the docks when everyone left.  Again, there were only dock workers around, no one suspicious or anyone doing anything shady.  Turning a corner, Naoto came upon the shipment container with the serial number that Ivy had given him. 

It was sitting on its own separated from all the other containers.  Double-checking the serial number, he moved around to the front of it to examine it further.  It wasn’t shackled with any chains, no padlocks, it was simply available for him to open and it examine if he wished to.  

He didn’t have a search warrant or anything, but he wasn’t here as a cop, he was here as a curious civilian.  Naoto hastily grabbed the handles of the shipping container and began to unlatch them and pried the doors open so he could peer inside the murkiness of the container. 

It was pitch black, nothing out of the ordinary he could see.  Pulling his cell phone from his pocket, he turned on the flashlight to illuminate the dense darkness of the can and set eyes on what appeared to be some sort of remote device at the back of the can. 

It was a bomb, that was armed when he got closer to it.  A blinking red light signaling that it had armed began to blink in rapid succession and Naoto nearly swallowed his tongue in surprise. 

“Fuck” 

The shipping container ignited into a large firestorm, blasting the metal from the inside into shrapnel. 

Ran had stopped back at the home he shared with you before heading to the hospital.  He showered and packed a bag of toiletries and clothes for you to bring to the hospital.   

While he finished packing whatever he thought would be important, he received an incoming text on his burner phone.  

UNKNOWN: It’s done, all clear. 

Ran scoffed a bit, more to himself than anyone else.  He didn’t think that Tachibana would go out so easily. 

Months had come and gone, Kai was now at home with you and Ran and the pair of you were trying to find your own routine, getting used to being new parents.   

You were exhausted, Ran was exhausted, but the two of you made it work.  Kai was getting better about sleeping through the night in her crib and in her own room, which was directly next to the master room.  

Things were quiet and semi-normal and you were grateful for that.  Over the past year, this was as close to normal as your life had been and honestly, it was exciting.  It was boring. You craved the normalcy that you were granted over time.  

After putting Kai down for the night, it was only a few minutes after eight and you were exhausted. Ran wasn’t home yet, you figured he had gotten tied up with something at work as per usual.  

Desperate for a shower, you brought the baby monitor next to your bed into the bathroom with you and quickly doused yourself under the shower head just in case the baby had woken up while you were bathing.   

You were quick, and after checking the baby monitor upon stepping out of the shower relieved that Kai was still fast asleep in the other room.  After sitting the baby monitor down on the nightstand you slipped on a silk chemise, one that had the extra support needed for your bosom, you slipped into bed nuzzling into your silk pillowcase. 

You had no idea when you had fallen asleep but you were startled awake by the groaning of the springs in your mattress and the plush cushion of it dipping behind you.  Ran’s arm wrapped around your middle to pull you flush against his abdomen. 

He pressed a soft kiss against your temple, tickling your nape with his damp hair. 

“You’re home...,” you breathed quietly, disoriented from being awoken so suddenly. 

“I missed you,” he cooed, draping an arm across you to turn up the volume on the baby monitor.  Kai’s quiet snores were audible across the device causing you to lift your head to observe the black-and-white screen.  “She’s knocked out,” 

You nodded tiredly, shifting in Ran’s hold so that you had an unobstructed view of his handsome face.  

“She should be out for the night,” you yawned quietly, afterward leaning in to kiss Ran on the cheek.  “She was good today,” 

In response, he pulled you in even closer nosing his way to the column of your throat where he suckled at the skin there feverishly.   

You tipped away from him flinching at the cackle of heat that seemed to shoot up your spine.   

“Good as in I can finally indulge in my beautiful wife for a night?”  He didn’t stop his ministrations, his rather large hands creeping toward the dip of your chemise tugging it down and away from you so one of your breasts popped free.  “Even if it’s just a few minutes,” 

You squealed underneath the assault your fingers twisting in the still-damp locks of Ran’s hair as you tried to pry him away from your overly sensitive and engorged breasts.  Each languid lick of his tongue sent harsh shockwaves of heat right to your middle.  It was so intense you were already on the verge of tears. 

Motherhood was different.  Your body had changed, you were curvier and softer in some places more than before and it drove Ran absolutely mad.  It had been a while since the two of you had been together, you had just been so tired of being a full-time mom, Kai was put first at every waking moment.   

You couldn’t avoid him forever.  He wanted to touch you and your body ached to be touched, enveloped in your doting husband's arms, but this, this was different.   

“R-Ran, don’t do that!” you muffled a squeal of discontent as he fixed his mouth around the sensitive nipple.  The teat expressed a few dribbles of breast milk at the tip of Ran’s tongue and your face began to heat, mortified at what your husband was doing.   

But Ran didn’t miss a beat.  He kept his eyes on yours gauging your reaction while he pulled away from your breast.  Slipping his tongue along his bottom lip thoughtfully, he tasted the remnants of the breast milk on his tongue as if savoring the subtle sweetness of it. 

“So, this is what our little one gets to gorge herself on every day, not bad...” You could see the way his grin widened, almost predator like and it felt as if your face was on fire, that you’d die from shame and embarrassment.  “Kai’s going to have to make room for daddy sometime-” 

Regardless of whatever he was going to say, you didn’t want to hear it.  The embarrassment was too much so you shoved your palm over Ran’s mouth to keep him from talking while using the other hand to cover what modesty you had left. 

“You’re embarrassing me,” you admitted, allowing Ran to remove your hand from his mouth. 

He looked puzzled, both of his fine brows knitting together in confusion while he inched closer resting his chin on your bosom.  

“Out of all the nasty things I’ve done to you up until now, this is embarrassing you?” he asked incredulously.   

Almost ashamed, you broke eye contact with him and attempted to put some space between your bodies, but he wouldn’t allow it. 

“What’s wrong mama?” Ran asked, keeping you snugly in his arms and forcing you to make eye contact with him. 

“It’s just that... my body is different... not what you’re used to and-” 

Ran interrupted you kissing you firmly on the lips.  “And I love every part of it,” 

Letting out a surprised squeal, you ogled him, taking note of the seriousness in his expression.  He was serious. 

“You carried my child with this body of yours, and no matter what you feel about it, it's beautiful to me.  I love every inch of it,” Ran brought the hand that was covering your chest to his lips and kissed the back of it.  “If you’re uncomfortable I won’t force you to be with me, I can wait until you’re ready,” 

Your vision had begun to blur and you knew you were going to cry before the tears began to fall down your cheeks.  After all the shit that the two of you had been through, you lucked out.  You ended up marrying possibly the gentlest gangster of them all. 

“I love you, Ran,” Cradling him in your arms, you thought about how perfect the future was going to be for your little family.  Things were going to be alright. 

BONUS: 

Two years later, things were great.  Ran had fronted you the money to get your practice up and running, you had a small building located in downtown Roppongi and a small intimate staff to help you along including Yoko.   

Everything was perfect.  Now that things had calmed down and Kai was almost 2, the coming months were going to be filled with planning your official wedding.  Ran promised that he would give you a real wedding and you were over the moon with planning everything. 

Although the wedding was still months away, you were beyond ecstatic to finally be able to walk down the aisle with Ran Haitani. 

Sealing the last invitation envelope on your desk, you began to place them in a decorated box so that you could mail them out later. A light knock at your office door caught you off guard, the door opening and Yoko sticking her head inside. 

“Hey, what’s up?” You asked curiously. 

“Your husband is on the line, he says its important, I patched him through… he seemed a bit agitated,” 

Nodding in acknowledgment, you picked up the phone on your desk watching as Yoko stepped out closing the door behind her. 

“Ran?” You breathed, waiting for his voice to come over the line. 

“Detectives are on their way over to your office, they’re going to question you, I just wanted to give you a heads up,” 

Baffled, you glanced out the glass windows of your office.  As if on cue, two detectives stepped into the lobby, flashing their badges to the clerk. 

“Ran, what’s going on?” Your aggravation was already overpowering your worry.  You knew what you signed up for, but things have been quiet lately.  What now? 

“I can’t talk right now, I’m going to turn myself in tonight so I won’t be home for dinner, don’t worry about bail money, Mikey has everything taken care of.” 

Your jaw dropped a bit, panic now flooding your voice. 

“Ran, what fuck?” The words were whispered and Ran was quick to cut you off. 

“I’ll be home by morning, I love you, and kiss the baby for me will ya?” 

The call was terminated right after with you slamming the phone down onto its receiver.  Worry, panic, agitation, your emotions were twisting around in your stomach making you sick.  Before you could get a grip on it all there was another knock at your office door. 

“Come in,” you sighed, now stone-faced as you stood before two unfamiliar detectives.  One of them flashed a badge, ATF apparently.   

“Mrs. Y/N Haitani?” The same one holding up the badge asked and you merely nodded crossing your arms across your midsection. 

“I was wondering if we could ask you a few questions about your husband,” He stuffed his badge into his pocket before continuing. “I’m agent Vancouver and this is my colleague agent, Harrod, I hope we’re not intruding,” 

What the fuck have they gotten into now?  

[ingeniousmindoftune]

Fire and Rescue 🛟 -02

Description: in which you and buck have had an ongoing sneaky link for a year now, he’s slowly falling for you, but you left town after he wants to become serious, now you’re back in town and a car accident sends a hold on your trip to see him… long story short.. you loose your memory, he’s the firefighter who rescues you, you have no memory of him… and now you’re contemplating feelings…

Warnings: mentions of bodily fluids in flashbacks, penetration and triggering subjects in flashbacks, also future smuts, fluffs and other things. Keep in mind I’m not good at smuts at all.

To be tagged, request it or write your name on the docs forum here.

•••••••••••••••••••

“She’s awake.” Bobby walked into the fire department and told Eddie.

Those were was all he needed, although the two of you ended briefly he hadn’t stopped thinking about you. He loved you more than anyone he’s ever loved, you and his relationship might just have been sexual. You two had build a bond, texting, joking with each other and staying up all night binge watching shows after everyone basically blew him off after a big fire broke out and there was no fatalities. He didn’t want to celebrate alone, so who did he call? You. And despite your bullshit, you was right there celebrating with him. You. You were the one woman he wanted to call to celebrate with, talk to, sleep with, cuddle up with… and every since you left, he couldn’t look at another woman, let alone get in bed with. “Buck! Buck!” Bobby called out from behind Buck.

But Buck was to far gone and headed to the hospital, he rushed to his car, still in uniform but, he didn’t care. He took off the rest of his gear leaving him in nothing but his black fire department tee and cargo pants and boots. He reached the hospital parked and sprinted into the building, breathless. “I just rolled in a woman in here, I’m with the fire department. I was told she was awake? Can I get any updates on her or see her? Please?” The nurse looked at Buck with uncertainty. “Please. I’m Evan Buckley. I’m with the LAFD. I just want to be sure she’s alright, please. Please, she’s carrying my child!” The nurse just nodded. “Okay. Let me find a doctor for you.” He sighed deeply and just nodded.

He sat in the waiting room, his knees and legs trembling. He ran his hand down his face. He was scared of the news he was received or scared you would turn him away. He wanted to call your mother but he only met her once and it was briefly when he popped up for a quickie before work, she had came over, she was in town and wanted to surprise you. So long story short he just didn’t know if she would even remember him. “Fire fighter Buckley?” I stood up, I remember she and I’s last fight; how she told me I didn’t love her, it was a phase. That I couldn’t be with just one woman, how I just put the job first and couldn’t possibly wanna settle down… “y-yes. I’m fire fighter Buckley. How is she? How’s the baby?”

“Miss.Y/L/N is doing fine, she made it through surgery. Suffered a few broken bones and a broken femur. We were able to get the swelling down on the brain.” He answered.

Buck nods his head. “Okay? Could I see her? How’s the baby?” Bobby walked through the doors, and rushed over to Buck. He had wanted to tell him the news before the doctor told him. “The baby is fine, she’s gonna need a couple surgeries in the future, but she’s doing good. You can see her she’s in NICU. And you can see Y/N. But keep in mind, she has no memory prior to the accident.” Buck didn’t understand or maybe he just didn’t care. “Room?” The doctor told him the room and off he went. “Buck, do you understand what the doctors telling you?” Buck looked back at Bobby. “I don’t care. I just want to see her.” Bobby sighed. “How do you know this woman?” Buck found your room, he looked at you through the window and stopped, looking back at Bobby and Eddie who was walking up with Chimney and Hen. “Y/N and I had a brief relationship some months ago, she skipped town after we called it quits.. I never told anyone because, I didn’t want to jinx anything between us.”

“She the reason why you was always blowing me off?” Eddie frowned

Buck brushed his hand over his face. “Eddie, it’s complicated. I’ll explain it all later but pretty much, truth is, I fell for her. She didn’t believe that I could want a serious relationship so we had this big fight and she left town and we never spoke again.” Bobby nods his head slowly. “and how are you so sure this baby is yours?” Eddie nodded, “He does have a point Buck.” Hen soon joined in on the conversation, “He’s right. She’s been gone for months you said, how you so sure?”

“She wasn’t the type to sleep around. Plus the time frame adds up, listen I just want to get in there. I’ll answer all questions later.”

Before anyone else could speak, he opened the door and went in, your eyes opened and you looked at him. You smiled. “Buckley?” He nodded and smiled from ear to ear just knowing that you’d remember him despite what the doctors had spoke. He walked around to the bed and sat at the foot of it. “Hey, how you feeling?” You groaned as you sat up a little. “Umm, the medicine is hiding the pain but the doctor says I’m going to be okay and so is my baby, thanks to you.” He smiled. “Im glad. You know I would do anything for you.” You chuckled nervously. “Do you usually talk to the women you save this way, fire fighter Buckley?”

“Ah,” he nods his head, knowing that you didn’t remember him. “You don’t remember me huh? They said you wouldn’t. I thought for sure you would.”

He shrugs. “I’m sorry but I don’t remember you. Other than when you and I were talking back at the accident, I’m sorry.. I don’t remember you.” Your hair was in the puffy curls just like he liked, the way your curls were all over your head and face, he loved it. He smiled slightly, he was pretty hurt. He looked down then up at you. “You and I actually dated in the past. We were actually seeing each other for quite awhile actually before you left town.” You nod your head. You could see why, he was attractive. Had all his teeth and just perfect.

“I’m sorry I don’t remember you…” brushing the side of your face. “Does that mean, you’re the father of my child?” Whether Buck knew the truth or not, he answered. “Yes.”

Tags:

@xsweetdellzx @hinatasfleshlight @skyesthebomb @bbygirlchristina @lovesanimals0000 @briana-mishell24 @piccasoe @wandasbitxh @littlebvbie @90sisthenew80s @tribalqueen20 @panicsinvirgo @wh0reforbucknasty @star017 @zenxn20 @pearlkitten33 @rosegoldcoco @laylasbunbunny

[svnflowervol666]

Pinky Promise (dad!Harry)

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: Harry introduces a certain special someone to the newest addition of his family.

Author’s Note: Surprise! Here’s some boy dad!Harry on this fine week night. I feel like Harry is almost always written as as girl dad (guilty as charged tho), so I wanted to show the boys some love. I didn’t really call this one an ‘x reader,’ because this one’s mostly about Harry and his bub, but the missus is still there, don’t worry! I hope you enjoy and as always, feedback of any kind, likes and especially reblogs are super helpful to keep me motivated to post more. Take care and TPWK.

     The Styles household was always filled with noise. Whether it was contagious laughter echoing off of the walls in the kitchen, the pitter patter of pudgy feet bursting through the back door from the garden, or the low humming of the secondhand record player coming from the living room. The sounds were comforting, reassuring to those that lived there. While the ruckus caused by something like which Joni Mitchell song Harry should play on the guitar before bedtime or what color everyone’s nails should be painted each week might seem chaotic to some, it represented a kind of tranquility that at one point did not seem possible to grasp.

    But today, in the modest, ivy-covered cottage with a pastel-yellow door, it was quiet. The sun poured in from the two open windows of the living area, filling the room with a still brightness that only London could emote. Dust particles danced in the light, drifting along through their own invisible current. The beginnings of the city could be seen in the distance, visible in a foggy haze with promises of sweet treats and adventue-packed days. But no sound, as the newest member of the Styles family had commanded the attention and affection of everyone within its walls.

    “She’s so little,” the youngest spoke up. Although he was now technically the oldest. He outstretched his hand out to caress the petite foot that stuck out from beneath the periwinkle-colored muslin blanket.

    “I know,” Harry replied, watching the swaddled newborn’s toes curl in reaction to being tickled by her brother, “I remember when you were this tiny, too.”

    “I was?” he asked, scratching at his chocolate brown curls that never laid flat.

    Harry nodded in affirmation, recalling the early morning when his son had been born prematurely. He’d spent nearly ten days resting in an uncomfortable vinyl recliner beside his girlfriend’s, who was now his wife, hospital bed counting down the minutes until the nurse would give them the “ok” to go visit their bub in the NICU. Harry stared in awe at his newborn through the glass of the incubator, using the open portal on the side to reach in and stroke his cheek with the faintest of touches. He was covered in wires and tubes, surrounded by monitors and beeping machines, all tasked with keeping his underdeveloped organs afloat. It was the most pitiful thing he had ever seen, and Harry still has those nights where he’s plagued with memories from the hospital. While the day he became a father was most certainly the best day of his life, it was one of the most traumatic experiences he’s ever been through.

    “Mhmm. You were actually even smaller when you were born,” Harry prodded, playfully wiggling his eyebrows at him.

    “No I wasn’t! the toddler jabbed back, crinkling his nose up at his parents, his aquamarine colored eyes turning into tiny slits on either side.

    “Umm, yes you were,” Harry’s wife replied with a chuckle from where she sat beside the rest of her family on the couch, “We bought the tiniest size clothes we could find and they still didn’t fit your teeny little bum.”

    The boy sat confused, trying to comprehend how a person could be smaller than his sister, let alone be so tiny that clothes didn’t even fit them.

    “Well, I’m big now. Right?”

    “Much bigger,” Harry reassured him, “But now that you’re bigger, you have t’ take care of your sister. You have to teach her how to be kind and share your toys with her. Think yeh can do tha’?”

    “Yes! C-can she swim with me in the pool?” he stumbled over his words, overjoyed by the idea of someone always being around to play his sacred water games with him in his nana’s pool.

    “Not yet, bubba,” Harry laughed, tickled by his son’s enthusiasm, “We have t’ wait until she’s a little bit older. But I’m sure she’d love to swim with you at Nana’s when she knows how.”

    “Okayyy,” the boy replied, slightly defeated.

    “Do you want t’ hold her?” Harry asked, gesturing to the sleeping bundle in his lap, her puffy eyelids closed peacefully as tiny, sporadic grunts left her little belly.

    “Yeah, but I don’t know how,” he professed, his plush, pink toddler lips turning down into a frown.

    “’S alright, I’ll show you,” Harry then carefully shuffled from his position on the couch, turning so that he was facing his son.

    “So, first, you have to make sure you hold her head because she can’t keep it up on her own,” Harry started, reaching over to place the baby girl into his son’s arms.

��   Unlike the last time, Harry’s hands didn’t shake. He wasn’t afraid like he was before, when his arms trembled as he took his newborn son into his arms for the first time, petrified that he was going to accidentally smother him or drop him and that the worst thing he could imagine would come true. No. This time, his hands were sturdy, protective over his new daughter as he was preparing to introduce her to his firstborn for the very first time.

     Harry’s wife looked on lovingly as his son took the baby from him excitingly, his left hand cupping her head gently. Her tired eyes were filled with love when he wrapped his arm protectively around her little tufts of peach fuzz in the best way that a five-year-old with mediocre hand-eye coordination could.

    “You also have t’ hold her bum so she doesn’t squirm out of your arms.”

    Harry took his son’s hand into his, guiding him to place his tiny forearm along the baby’s back with his palm resting on her diaper-clad bottom. When he was confident of his son’s grip on the infant, he pulled back. He made sure to hover over him with his brawny, tanned arms just ghosting over his son’s. Just in case.

    The boy was elated. His sister was warm and soft, and she looked like one of the stuffed animals that he slept with every night. He couldn’t believe that the person he talked to in his mother’s belly every night for nine months and gave kisses to each morning before nursery school was here and real and now she gets to live with him forever.

    “She’s so cute,” he spoke in gentle whisper this time, remembering what his mum had told him about being quiet around the baby so that she doesn’t wake up cranky.

    He was absolutely smitten over her. Everything about her was the cutest thing he had ever seen in his brief time on Earth: her button nose that sat perfectly above her lips, her miniature fingers wound tightly her fist as if she was ready to fight, her little tongue that barely poked through her mouth each time she yawned. He could stare at her forever if he could.

    Instinctively, he pulled her into his bony chest for a hug, squeezing a little too harder than he should have. The baby girl tensed in his grasp at the motion, the beginnings of a shrill whine escaping her pruney lips.

    “Whoa, bub. You have t’ be careful,” Harry intervened, loosening his son’s arms so that the baby rested peacefully in the boy’s lap again.

    “She’s fragile. You can’t squeeze her like that,” the boy’s mum reminded him.

    “Sorry, Baby,” said the boy as he reached down to press his tiny lips to her eyebrow.

    Her forehead wrinkled up at the contact, similar to one of auntie Gemma’s baby puppies, thought the boy to himself. He also thought that she kind of looked like one of the puppies too, but he kept that to himself.

    Harry and his wife watched their children interacted, how his son was brushing his thumb along her skull, how her face relaxed at the steady motion. They were already in sync with each other, already comforting each other just by their presence. They were both besotted with their daughter, but Harry thinks he might be just a bit more in love with her than his wife. Harry had gotten used to raising his son, while he taught him to be a kindhearted and gentle creature, there had always been a degree of roughness to which he interracted with him. His daughter, however, was made of glass, Harry had convinced himself. He vowed to do whatever it took to make sure she never shed a single tear because of him or anything else he had control over.

    Now, Harry had two babies. One boy and one girl, just like his family before this one. The similarities slightly terrified him. His son was soft and gentle and loving, just like Harry had been as a child. He was sensitive, always yearning to be held and touched in the way that Harry had when he was his age. His daughter, even though she was only a few days old, was already a stubborn little fighter like his sister. She cried her lungs out within her first few hours of being born, kicking and screaming until it looked like her face was turning blue. She hated the harsh lights that the doctors shone in her eyes and their cold hands that poked and prodded at her belly like she was a science experiment. It wasn’t until she was in the arms of her family that her wailing subsided.

    It was thoughts like these that felt surreal to Harry. He never saw himself as someone that could be in the position he is now. He’d always thought he’d be an eternal bachelor, someone who only ever stayed with someone for a certain period of time before everything inevitably blew up in his face and he’d be back at square one. He never thought that he’d be the type of person with a wife and a white picket fence and a slew of babies; he never thought that he could be the type of person who could be this happy.

    “Bubby, can I ask you to promise me something?” Harry asked as he scooped the boy into his lap, making sure the baby was secure so that the three of them laid in one pile on the couch.

     He pulled his wife closer as well, making sure they were shoulder to shoulder and he felt surrounded on all sides by the ones he loved the most.

    “What?” his son asked, peering up at his papa with huge eyes that resembled saucers, his long, dark eyelashes brushing his brow bones.

    “I want you to promise me,” Harry began, wrapping his arms tighter around his two babies, resting his chin in the crook of his son’s neck, “tha’ whatever happens t’ the two of you, no matter how many times you get into fights. No matter how mad you might make each other. That you’ll love her. No matter what. That you’ll always be her big brother.”

    Harry hadn’t realized, but his voice trailed off near the end. His voice was just above a whisper, so quiet that only his son could hear. He pressed his lips to side of his bub’s forehead, an attempt to soothe both his son and himself.

    “Can yeh do that f’ me?”

    The boy in Harry’s lap pondered his father’s words. His finger went absentmindedly to stroke his sister’s hand, astonished when her fingers unfurled from the tight fist they’d been bound in all day. He slipped his pinky into her palm just as her muscles relaxed so that she was now clutching tightly to his digit.

    He had no idea of the weight that Harry’s words carried. He had no idea of the thoughts of uncertainty that haunted Harry about never getting to this point in his life. He doesn’t understand the cruelty that exists outside the walls of his home besides the pesky little boy in his class that borrows his crayons and doesn’t give them back. He doesn’t know that other children don’t grow up in homes with parents that love each other like his do.

    He didn’t know any of these things, but he sensed that it meant a great deal to Harry, and he wanted to make sure that his father knew he could count on him for anything because he loved him with all of his heart and Harry proved that to him every single day.

    “Pinky promise, papa,” the boy responds, loosening his hand that was wrapped around his sister to offer it to Harry.

[heauxplesslydevoted]

Everybody Talks (Ethan x MC)

Summary: At a conference hosted by the American Medical Association, Ethan stumbles upon an unpleasant conversation about his girlfriend.

Warnings: None

~v~

Ethan watches as his girlfriend owns the room. At the American Medical Association conference in their own city of Boston, in the large ballroom of The Ritz Carlton, he quietly observes from the corner as she excitedly chats with a Dr. Catherine Stanley, a renowned surgeon from Columbia, while everyone within an arm's reach of her is drawn in by the sheer magnetism of her presence. He’ll never get tired of watching her like this. Naomi is completely in her element. Whenever she’s in a deep conversation about medicine, her posture loosens, her nose crinkles, and her voice takes on a pitchy breathiness the more and more excited she gets.

So caught up in thinking about her, Ethan doesn’t even notice that she’s walking up to him until she’s within a few feet. She smiles brightly as she leans against the bar. “You’re not mingling.”

“You’ve known me for over three years now. I’m not one to mingle.”

“Come on, there has to be someone here you want to talk to.”

“You.”

Naomi rolls her eyes. “Mhm-hmm, you’re so charming, Dr. Ramsey.”

“I’m being very serious. Why wouldn’t I want to talk to the keynote speaker?”

When Naomi found out they wanted her to speak at the conference, she was almost certain they meant to speak to Ethan and that she accidentally answered a phone call meant for him. But they in fact wanted her, the newest and youngest head of the diagnostics team. Her meteoric rise up the ranks of Edenbrook had made quite the splash in the medical community, where everyone knew everyone. Whether she realized it or not, Naomi had become a wunderkind and everyone wanted a piece of her.

And while she was nervous, Ethan couldn’t be more proud of her. Naomi is brilliant, and it’s about time more people were rewarded with being in her presence long enough to see it.

Naomi groans and runs a hand along her midsection. “Don’t remind me that I’m giving a speech soon, my stomach is already in knots.”

Ethan holds up his tumbler of whiskey, angling the glass towards her. “Want some liquid courage?”

“No, eating or drinking might make it worse. I won’t feel better until I’m on the other side of it.”

“In the three years I’ve known you, I’ve never seen a shy bone in your body. Where are the nerves coming from?”

“I’ve never done something like this,” Naomi responds. “I’ve never given a speech in front of hundreds of people–maybe even more, this place is packed. Public Speaking is the only class I ever got a B in in college.”

Ethan gasps teasingly. “The horror.” He chuckles softly as Naomi pokes him in the rib. Moving closer, Ethan clasps a warm hand around Naomi’s shoulder, massaging gently. “You’re going to do just fine. Better than fine, even, you’re going to be amazing. You’re smart, charming, funny, and eloquent, and the directors knew what they were doing when they chose you to speak. And besides, nearly all of Edenbrook is here to support you. Lahela might’ve even snuck in a camcorder.”

It's a slight exaggeration, but a lot of physicians practicing at Edenbrook belong to the prestigious association, and did not want to miss the chance to see one of their own speak.

“Ugh don’t remind me. It’s easier speaking to a crowd of nameless, faceless people. What if I forget my speech? What if my accent becomes super obnoxious and no one can understand me? What if I trip on stage?”

“You could always picture everyone naked, I’ve been told that it helps.”

Naomi blanches at the suggestion. “No, I don’t want to picture all of these people naked.”

“Good, because that was a trick suggestion,” Ethan murmurs. He rests his forehead against Naomi’s, his lips hovering mere centimeters from hers. “The only person you should ever be visualizing sans clothing is me.”

“Lucky for me, I get to do a lot more than just visualize.”

The happy couple share a kiss before Ethan nuzzles his face into the crook of his girlfriend’s neck, whispering quiet words of encouragement and affirmation.

On the other side of the bar, a group of women watch the jarring public display of affection play out. Ethan Ramsey was notorious for hating medical conferences, never engaging or interacting with people. He was also known for being perpetually single, so to see him so open with another person felt like foreign.

“I still can’t believe the two of them are together,” Dr. Nicole Harrington whispers to her group of friends as they gawk at the pair. While she works in New York, it’s hard to not be aware of the story behind Dr. Ethan Ramsey and his young protege Dr. Valentine, especially since she’s in touch with so many Boston-based doctors. “I can’t believe Ramsey is so open with her.”

“I think they’re cute,” Nicole’s friend, Monica coos. “I’m a hopeless romantic.”

The third member of the party, Greta stays silent. She’s one of the two people within their group with actual ties to Edenbrook, her husband having been attending there for almost 8 years now. Her husband Ashland keeps her up to date on all the ins-and-outs of hospital gossip, and she knows all about Ethan’s messy entanglement with his former resident.

“He wasn’t even like this when he dated Harper Emery,” their last friend Angelica whispers. As a neurologist herself, she’s worked alongside both Ethan and Harper for a long time, and while the hospital knew of their relationship, if you weren’t looking for the extremely subtle signs, you’d never know they used to be together. For years, at that. But for some reason, Ethan can’t seem to go 5 seconds without being near Dr. Valentine. Within the walls of Edenbrook, it's becoming harder and harder to see one without the other. “And she’s Harper freaking Emery for Christ’s sake.”

The conversation pauses as someone on stage taps the mic, gathering everyone’s attention. Out of the corner of her eye, Greta watches as Ethan plants another kiss on his lover’s forehead and she disappears in the crowd before she’s introduced as the evening’s guest speaker.

Ethan doesn’t know why his girlfriend was ever so nervous because as soon as she accepts the microphone and starts to speak, he’s transfixed.

His tunnel vision is split when he hears an aggressive whisper from a few feet away. Frowning, he turns around, fully prepared to demand that whoever has the gall to interrupt Naomi’s speech should shut the hell up, but he stops when he realizes that they’re talking about her.

“She’s been a member of the AMA for what, 3 seconds and she’s already giving speeches? Are we in the freaking Twilight Zone?”

“I guess it pays to keep Ethan Ramsey’s bed warm.”

Greta scoffs, finally acknowledging the conversation. “Ashland tells me everything about the two of them, and it’s all so messy. She’s been leading him around like she’s dangling an apple in front of a horse since she got to Edenbrook. He gave her preferential treatment her intern year, and miraculously she gets the coveted fellowship on the Dr. Banerji’s team. He gets promoted, and surprise, surprise, he gives her the team, wrapped up in a neat little bow. Never mind the fact that she should be nowhere near leading a team, she killed a patient her intern year. So for him to be...parading that young girl around is tawdry and disrespectful to the hospital.”

If this was a cartoon, Ethan is almost positive his face would be very red and steam would be wafting out of his ears because that’s how angry he is. The audacity of these women to stand a mere 8 feet away from him and trash talk the woman he loves is disrespectful on so many levels.

Obnoxiously, he clears his throat, garnering their attention. The only one with the decency to look slightly embarrassed is Monica, as Ethan catches her cheeks flushing under his harsh attention.

Angelica stands up straighter, “Chief Ramsey, we were just–”

“Participating in a misogynistic diatribe against a fellow doctor,” Ethan finishes. “Question, did any of you graduate at the top of your classes from a top 10 ranked medical school?” No one dares respond. “Out of the 4 of you, did you guys save Naveen Banerji’s life while he was dying of sepsis? Have you spent your after hours holed up in the NICU with your patient’s newborn baby? Any of you face a near death experience and come back to the scene of the crime in order to help more people?”

Ethan’s eyes narrow at Angelica and Greta in particular. “When Edenbrook nearly shut down, I don’t remember seeing your face as we worked tirelessly in the free clinic Dr. Banks, nor do I recall seeing your husband Mrs. Park. I don’t remember him lobbying to politicians or attempting to secure funds during fundraisers, but I do recall seeing him show up at parties without you to flirt with nurses.”

Greta balks at Ethan’s words, clearly not expecting him to unleash such anger. “Dr. Ramsey, I’ll have you know that my husband–”

“Is spreading vicious gossip and lies about a doctor with higher ranking than him. Dr. Valentine got her spot on the diagnostics team fair and square. She was the number 1 intern so Naveen picked her. When I left the team, she was the last tenured member at the time, with the most experience in how a team of such magnitude ran. She was the best pick for the job.”

“Over the course of her time at Edenbrook, she has more than proved that she earned her seat at the table, and to suggest anything else is an insult to her strengths and talents as a doctor, as well as my judgement. To suggest that I do not know to remain professional while I’m at work and the only reason she’s in the position that she’s in is because of our private relationship isn’t just a lie, but a dangerous and slanderous one as well. And if someone so much as ever implies it again, I will slap them with a lawsuit so fast their head will spin, and the closest they’ll ever get to practicing medicine again is slapping Band-Aids on kindergarteners.”

The group of women receive a threat loud and clear And they remain silent not wanting to be at the receiving end of anymore of his wrath.

Ethan sighs heavily. “Well, now that this pesky conversation has come to an end, I’m going to continue to listen to Naomi’s speech. The one that she was hand selected to deliver, while the rest of you are in a position to do nothing more than watch from the crowds.”

With the catty group of women stunned into silence, Ethan smiles, his work complete. “Enjoy the rest of your evening, ladies.”

They watch as he downs the rest of his drink before sauntering off. Once he’s gone, Monica huffs out a shaky breath. “Well...I’ve always said there’s nothing more attractive than a man defending the woman he loves.”

~v~

Tags: @mvalentine @choicesaddict5 @professorkingslay @maurine07 @aka-calliope @bluebellot @whimsicallywayward15 @blossomanarchy @takemyopenheart @jamespotterthefirst @fanmantrashcan @whatchique @ao719 @x-kyne-x @colourmeshy @paulfwesley @the-pale-goddess @writinghereandthere @ramseyandrys @perriewinklenerdie @aworldoffandoms @thatcatlady0716 @drakewalker04 @canknot @hatescapsicum @lapisreviewsstuff @senseofduties @badchoicesposts @ethandaddyramseyx @chasingrobbie @zodiacsign1 @choices-lurker @my-heart-beats-for-ya @adrian-motherfucking-raines @riverrune @edith-eggs1 @thatysn @bellcat2010 @blainehellyes @cecilecontrera @junehiratas @choices-love-affair @openheart12 @caseyvalentineramsey @desmaranj @nazario-sayeed @aestheticartsx @ruinedbypixels @nooruleman @rookie-ramsey @uneravine @choicest

[iamtrebleclefstories]

that same kind of joy

98 - “You scared the shit out of me.” 

Now, I wasn’t really sure how I felt about this fic when I first started writing it and I had no idea where it was gonna go, but I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out. It’s not exactly what you might’ve had in mind, but I hope you enjoy! @andreagraham​

this takes place in a wonderful world where 16x16 never happened :)

She remembers a bang. It was loud and deafening to the point that when she comes to, there’s an incessant ringing in her ears. She wants to just lay there and sleep, but that’s probably just the mild concussion talking. Instead, she painstakingly cracks her eyes open just enough to get a good view of her surroundings.

Metal. Bright. Debris. Blood.

Blood.

It’s not her own. At least, Jo doesn’t think it belongs to her. It is a trail of blood that extends in front of her, leading in front of a woman with a swollen abdomen who is crying out in distress. Jo picks herself up from the ground long enough to realize what just happened.

She remembers getting on the train back to Seattle after a weekend medical conference in San Francisco with Carina Deluca. It had been a spur of the moment decision, something Alex had surprised her with when he presented her with a train ticket, booked hotel room, and a weekend off. She had been thrilled at the prospect of hearing Addison Montgomery speak as she considered a career switch to OB. It had been the perfect getaway, until about ten minutes ago.

Now, Jo stands in the remains of one of the train cars she’d been traveling in and looks around in horror to see multiple individuals in varying states of trauma. She quickly canvasses the area to determine who seemed okay and who looked as though they were in immediate need of assistance. After getting help from a nursing student, dental PA, and off-duty officer that happened to be riding in the same train car, Jo leaves the other passengers and makes her way over to the pregnant woman who was clearly in labor.

“Hey,” Jo crouches down in front of the woman. “My name is Jo Karev. I’m a surgeon at Grey Sloan Memorial in Seattle. I see that you’re having some contractions. Is it okay if I examine you?” Jo waits until the woman nods her consent before gently pressing her hands on the woman’s bump to determine position. “What’s your name?”

“Alyssa,” the young woman breathes out heavily. “My name is Alyssa Belmont.”

“Nice to meet you Alyssa. Can you tell me how far along you are?” Jo looks down at her watch to monitor the length and interval of the contractions.

“I'm only 35 weeks,” Alyssa’s voice betrays her anxiety. “It’s too early.”

“It’s okay, the ambulance is going to be here soon and we will be able to get you and your baby to a hospital safely where some really nice pediatrician will make sure that they’re just fine,” Jo takes the hand sanitizer from her purse and uses it to disinfect her hands and ruffles through her first aid kit to find a single pair of gloves. “Do you know what you’re having?”

“A boy,” Alyssa nods. “My fiancé is stationed overseas but is supposed to come home in two weeks. He was supposed to be here for the delivery. I’m not supposed to be doing this alone.”

“Hey, Alyssa. Listen to me. You are not alone. I’m right here with you and I promise I won’t leave your side until you are holding a healthy baby in your arms,” Jo locks eyes with the young woman in front of her. “I need to know some things if I’m going to better care for you. Did you get hurt when the train derailed? Did you feel a tearing or a sharp pain in your abdomen?”

“No,” Alyssa shakes her head. “Just the contractions. But I had already been feeling some sporadic contractions throughout the day and the past week if I’m being honest. That’s normal though, right? Like Braxton hicks?”

“Yes, it's completely normal to feel a couple contractions here and there once you’re nearing the end of your pregnancy. It’s your body trying to prepare itself for birth,” Jo takes off her jacket and drapes it over Alyssa’s lower abdomen and pelvis to maintain some semblance of modesty. “Okay Alyssa, I’m going to push up your dress and remove your leggings and underwear so that I can get a look at how much you’ve progressed.”

Prior to the surprise delivery she was pulled into a couple weeks ago where all she had to do was catch the baby, it had been a long time since Jo had delivered a baby that wasn’t a c-section. It had been years since she had to check for dilation and effacement and in that moment she found herself really wishing that Carina - who had opted to stay in San Francisco for a few days more with a friend - had been on this train instead of her.

“Okay, Alyssa. It looks like you're about eight centimeters dilated and I'd say somewhere around eighty to ninety percent effaced,” Jo informs.

“What does that mean?” Alyssa brushes her hair out of her face and winces as another contraction comes over her.

“That means that pretty soon it’ll be time to push,” Jo looks around to the surrounding passengers. “Does anyone have a clean towel or blankets in their bag? And water. I need an unopened water bottle.”

A few of the lesser injured passengers step forward after ruffling through their bags to present Jo with the items she requested, “Here are two bottles of water, one clean towel, and three blankets.”

Jo does her best to keep Alyssa comfortable and wait until the paramedics arrive. But within minutes, Alyssa is fully dilated, effaced, and ready to push. Jo looks down at Alyssa and keeps her face as calm as possible so as not to alert the young woman to the anxiety currently building up inside of her.

“Alright, Alyssa, once you feel your next contraction I need you to push. You’re going to push for ten seconds and then take a break. Do you understand?”

Alyssa grunts in response, “Yup.”

After what seems like an eternity, the train car fills with a sharp, loud cry. Jo feels some tears prickle at her eyes as she’s the first person to hold this little one as it enters the world, “Hey there, little man. You’ve got a set of lungs on you. That’s good. I was worried about your little lungs. Let’s get you cleaned up so your mama can hold you.” Jo uses the surrounding materials to clean and warm up the infant before placing him on Alyssa’s chest.

“Oh God,” Alyssa chokes out a quiet sob. “You’re here. Hi baby. I’m so sorry your daddy isn’t here but I know that he’ll be so happy to meet you.”

Jo wipes a straying tear from her eye on her arm, “I hate to intrude on the moment but we do have to cut the cord and deliver the placenta.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Alyssa shakes her head. “Can I just hold him for one more second?”

“I don’t see why not,” Jo barely has time to get those words out of her mouth when paramedics come rushing through the train car. She breathes out a sigh of relief and flags one of them down. “Hi, I’m a surgeon at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital in Seattle. This woman just gave birth to a premature infant at thirty five weeks. She and the baby need to go to the hospital immediately.”

The paramedic quickly calls her partner to assist her as they make quick work of getting Alyssa out of the train and into an ambulance. Just as Jo is about to turn around and head back inside to help in any way she can, Alyssa puts her hand on Jo’s arm, “Can you come with us? Please. You said you’d be there and I really don’t want to be alone.”

Looking up at the paramedic to make sure that it’s okay to ride along, Jo squeezes Alyssa’s hand gently, “Of course.”

+++

Jo shouldn’t have been all that surprised when she feels a familiar set of arms tighten around her, bringing her close to his chest. She sighs contently as she allows her husband to hold her tenderly. She whimpers in protest when Alex pulls away to get a good look at her.

“Jo,” he breathes out in relief. “You scared the shit out of me.” Alex presses a light kiss to her forehead. “When I saw the crash on the news I almost had a heart attack. I tried calling you and the hospitals but no one was saying anything. No one knew what was going on. All we knew was that the train derailed in the middle of nowhere Oregon and some of the cars detached and got flipped on their sides. What the hell happened?”

“I delivered a baby today,” Jo huffs a laugh. “After the crash knocked me out for a few minutes, I got up and there was a woman in premature labor. Her name is Alyssa. I-I delivered her baby. I was the first person in this entire world that got to hold him. The world was literally crashing down around us, but I got to deliver this beautiful baby boy with a surprisingly well developed set of lungs for how early he was born. I’ve been with her ever since it happened. They’re moving her up to a room right now. I’m supposed to meet her up there.”

“Baby, that’s incredible. But have you gotten checked out?” Alex asks quietly. “I need to know that you’re okay.”

“I’m okay, Alex,” Jo assures him. “I have a mild concussion and a couple of bruised ribs. Nothing that some ibuprofen and rest won’t fix.” Alex scowled unconvinced, causing Jo to laugh. “I’m fine. Really. Now do you want to come with me to see them?”

“Okay, fine.”

They make their way up to Alyssa’s room and Jo introduces Alex and Alyssa to each other. They spoke softly for a few moments until Alyssa’s doctor showed up outside the room.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the doctor smiles sheepishly at the group. “But you can go ahead and see your baby Miss Belmont. I can get one of the nurses to take you up to the NICU.”

“That’s okay, we can take her,” Jo and Alex help Alyssa out of the bed and into a wheelchair, carefully bringing her to stop beside her son’s warmer. “There he is.”

Alex looks up at the monitors as he listens to a resident list off the results of the studies they’d been conducting over the past few hours, “His SATs and his APGAR look great, all things considered. He’ll probably spend a week or two here before he’s sent home. He’s a strong and resilient little guy.” Alyssa and the resident both look at him in question. “I’m a peds surgeon.”

The hours go by quickly and before anyone knows it, night has fallen. Alex nudges Jo slightly, “Hey, I think we should get going. You need some rest. I got us a hotel room for the night.”

Jo nods in agreement and goes to move when Alyssa places a hand on her shoulder, “Wait. You can’t leave without knowing what the baby’s name is. I finally decided on a name.”

“What is it?” Jo asks expectantly.

“His name is Joseph Benjamin Harold. Joey for short,” Alyssa reveals. “It’s only fitting that he be named after the person who helped bring him into this world.”

“Are you serious?” Jo’s face breaks out into a wide grin. “I-I feel honored.”

“Thank you, Jo. For everything. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Those words stick with Jo all the way back to the hotel. As they’re getting into bed that night, Jo cuddles up to Alex and sighs dreamily.

“What was that for?” Alex’s face turns up into a half smile as he glances down at his wife.

“I’m just so happy right now,” Jo shakes her head. “I know I shouldn’t be. Today was a horrible day for a lot of people. There was a tragic accident. But in the midst of all of that, I helped bring a baby into the world and I feel so much joy because of it.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Alex pulls her closer. “A big part of why I love peds is because of the joy you feel every time you’re able to save a kid and give them hope for a future. And I’ve assisted on quite a few deliveries and it’s pretty incredible.”

“I think I wanna switch. I wanna make the switch to OB,” Jo exhales. “I love surgery, don’t get me wrong. And maybe one day I’ll venture into maternal-fetal surgery, but I want to be an OB, Alex. I want to deliver babies and feel that same kind of joy every single day.”

“Okay. So as soon as we get back to the hospital, we’re going to talk to Bailey and see about getting a letter of recommendation to the OB program so that you can switch specialties without repeating an intern year,” Alex rubs circles on Jo’s back.

“Are you sure? I know this is a big decision. I’ll be a resident again. I’ll have longer hours and be making resident money again,” Jo eyes widen at Alex’s simple response to her desire to make the change.

“Jo, I make plenty of money for the both of us. We’re married, we have a joint bank account. You don’t need to worry about the money. We dated throughout your entire surgical residency and everything was just fine. I want to support you however I can, and if what you want is to be a part of the vagina squad then I’m going to support you in that. I’m going to be there for you every step of the way,” Alex’s lips curve into a smirk. “Besides, I think you’ll look really hot in pink scrubs.”

“Shut up,” Jo laughs and shoves him lightly.

“What? It’s the truth. But then again, I think you look hot in everything.”

“You’re so good to me,” Jo’s eyes shine with happiness. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

[mochegato]

Hope on Board

Chapter 28 – You Can Never Go Home Again

Chapter 1     Chapter 27

“Okay Ms. Dupain-Cheng,” the doctor said pushing away from the hospital bed in the birthing center and pulling off her gloves.  “You are completely effaced.  We are definitely ready to go.”

Marinette looked up at Dick, an absolutely panicked expression on her face before looking over to the doctor.  “What?  What about an epidural?  We had a birthing plan.  It included an epidural.”

The doctor gave her a sympathetic look and shook her head slightly.  “I understand, but it appears the universe had other plans.  We are too far along for an epidural.  You’re going to be pushing before the anesthesiologist will even be able to get here.”

“Fuck you,” she scoffed.  Her eyes immediately widened at her words.  “I’m sorry that was… I’m sorry.  Doctor Graham, was it?” she clarified.  The doctor nodded.  Marinette smiled in response, which quickly turned into a grimace and scream as another contraction hit.  “Fuck you, Dr. Graham,” she growled.

“There isn’t any way to get the anesthesiologist up there faster?” Dick tried, desperate for any way to help Marinette feel less scared and less pain.

Dr. Graham chuckled at Marinette’s outburst.  “I get that a lot.  Unfortunately, no.  There’s nothing I can do.  The anesthesiologist is with another patient right now and won’t be able to get here for about twenty minutes or more.  I expect at least the first baby to already be born by then, maybe both,” she informed them earnestly.  “Sorry. It took too long to get you here.”

“Well sorry for getting kidnapped by some bird obsessed cult,” Marinette gritted out after another contraction passed.

Dr. Graham looked over to Dick who shrugged at her.  “The bats just saved her and we rushed right here.”  Dr. Graham shook her head.  Honestly, not the strangest thing she’d heard in Gotham. “We will need extra security because of it,” Dick added.

“We can have police in with the babies,” Dr. Graham assured him.

“Oh Hell no,” Marinette grunted.

“Police officers were the ones to deliver her to the cult,” Dick explained, running his hand up and down Marinette’s arm in a soothing motion.

Dr. Graham nodded, again, not too surprising.  “Do you have an alternative?” she asked as she gave orders to the nurses to get the room set up for the birth.

Dick shrugged distractedly, his focus on the pained expression Marinette was making and the way her body was curling in pain.  “We can work something out.  The bats seemed to know something about the cult.  They might be willing to help keep watch.”

“Yeah, maybe we can focus on the baby trying to come out right now, yeah?” Marinette growled between pants.

“Of course,” Doctor Graham said kindly.  “We’re already getting everything ready and I’ll let you know when to start pushing.”

Marinette nodded silently.  She looked over to Dick, her look of annoyance with the situation turning to a look of panic.  She was not ready for this.  She was not ready for the twins to be born.  She didn’t have everything settled.  She and Dick hadn’t talked.  She didn’t know where they stood.  They hadn’t talked about where they were going to stay.  She hadn’t even processed the kidnapping yet.

“It’ll be okay,” he cooed at her soothingly.  He took her hand in his, bringing it to his chest as he wiped her sweaty hair away from her face.  He looked lovingly in her eyes and gently rubbed his thumb along her cheek.  “You can do this.  You’re the strongest person I know.  You’re amazing.”  He kissed her temple.  “I’ll be right here to support you however I can.  Feel free to try to break my hand while you push.”

Marinette huffed out a short laugh.  “I might take you up on that.”  She breathed through another contraction, squeezing his hand and groaning loudly as it crested.

“Go ahead,” he assured her.  “I can take it.  I have the easy part.”  He gave her a soft smile, until she turned to face the doctor and grimaced while her focus was elsewhere.  She might actually break his hand at this rate.  “Just focus on the end.  When this is all over, we’re going to have two beautiful babies just as amazing as their mother.”  She looked back up at him, uncertainty clear, but fading.  “The universe can’t take you down.  The Court of Owls couldn’t take you down.  You can do this,” he whispered confidently.  She nodded at him, a look of determination settling in as she felt the start of the next contraction.

“Alright Ms. Dupain-Cheng.  It’s time to push,” Dr. Graham informed her with a smile.

<><><><><> 

“I’ve been thinking…” Dick started, looking over cautiously to Marinette.  She was sitting in a glider in the twins’ NICU room attempting to nurse Robert.  Robert was doing extremely well, but his sucking reflex was still developing, making latching on more difficult for him than it was for Lucy.  Lucy was resting comfortably on Dick’s bare chest, enjoying skin to skin contact under the simulated sun lamps.  Her black hair sticking up above the blanket wrapped around her and Dick.

Marinette gave him a tired smile.  “About?” she prompted.

“Living arrangements when Lucy and Robert are ready to go home.  Robert’s doing a lot better now.  I think he’ll be ready to go home in a few days.  Lucy will probably be ready sooner,” he answered, turning to be able to make eye contact with Marinette while they talked. It had been a few days since the twins had been born and they still hadn’t had a chance to really talk. Between the coordination of taking care of the twins and making sure there were eyes on them at all times and the exhaustion on Marinette’s system from delivering the babies and after the kidnapping, there hadn’t really been time.

“Dick, I…” she started looking away guiltily.

“I know you’re not ready to date let alone move back in together,” he assured her gently, “this isn’t about that,” he assured her gently.  “This is about their safety.  The Court of Owls isn’t eliminated.  They have multiple strongholds.  This was a hard hit, but they aren’t gone.”  He ran his hand through his hair and looked away nervously. “I don’t even think the apartment is safe.”

“The prophecy,” she nodded, tickling Robert’s cheek to try to get him to open his mouth wider.  “This isn’t over is it?”  

Dick shook his head.  “I don’t think so.  It’ll take a while for them to recover, but I think they’ll be back.”

She sighed sadly and tried to focus entirely on Robert so Dick wouldn’t see the tears in her eyes at the thought of them returning, the thought that they would never truly be safe until the Court was completely eliminated.  She ran her hand over his curly black hair.  Whereas Lucy had gotten her mother’s straight, thick black hair, Robert’s was closer to his father’s.  Little curls licked his face and curled away.  “So, what were you thinking?”

Marinette may have turned away from Dick, but he still knew her well enough to know she was terrified and trying to hide it.  He could see it in the way she hid her face.  He could see it in the way her shoulders curled around Robert.  He could see it in the way she held him just a little closer.  He moved so he was sitting next to her and could cup her face with his free hand.  

“We’ll keep them safe, Marinette.  We won’t let anything happen to them,” he assured her.  The fierce determinism in his voice made her want to believe him. They would do everything they could to protect their babies.  She leaned into his hand and nodded.  “So, what I was thinking was… we should make sure they are as safe as possible.” She gave him a confused look, unsure why he suddenly sounded so tentative.  “And the most secure place I can think of… is the manor.”

Marinette stared at him for a few seconds, mouth slightly agape in surprise. “You think we should move into the manor?” she whisper shouted.  “Dick, I don’t want to live in Bruce’s home for the rest of our lives.”

“I know, I know.  It’s not ideal,” Dick conceded.  Before the kidnapping, he certainly would never have expected to propose returning to the manor.  He had moved out for a reason and now, with Marinette and the twins, there were even more reasons not to.  But, there was one overwhelming, overpowering reason they should.  “But, it’s the safest place in Gotham, probably New Jersey, possibly in all of America.  He has a ton of security to ward off cults, rogues, magicians, assassins, and everything else he could think of.”

“And it’s so big!  What if the twins play hide and seek in a few years and we never find them?  That place is too big,” she exclaimed.

“Okay, good point,” he allowed.  It wasn’t and they both knew it.  There was no way they, Kismet, or Alfred wouldn’t be able to find them, but he wasn’t going to argue that point.  His focus was to get the twins under the best security they could manage, not get lost in the details.  Not to mention, he had actually gotten lost in the manor a few times when he first moved there, so he knew getting lost was a possibility.  It’s just that they wouldn’t stay that way.  “But what if we take Bruce up on allowing him to build us a secure home.  Our own home, with just as much security.”

“Dick!” she exclaimed loudly and immediately regretted it.  She startled Robert off his finally successful latch and woke Lucy up.  “Sorry,” she grimaced apologetically.

Dick chuckled at her and started bouncing Lucy to lull her back to sleep. “I know.  I don’t really like the idea of asking him either, but we need some place safe.  The Court of Owls is dangerous, extremely well connected, and apparently obsessed with our children.  We need top of the line security and I don’t think we could afford it otherwise.  I think it’s the only way to keep them safe.”

She stared at him silently for a few minutes.  Not really sure how to react.  He was right.  They would need security, more security than they could afford otherwise.  However, they did have built in security with the kwami, not that Dick knew about that yet.  But it also wasn’t entirely reliable.  The kwami couldn’t do much more than warn them if something was happening. They couldn’t act on it without potentially devastating consequences.

Dick spoke up after a few minutes, misinterpreting her hesitation.  “I… I can live somewhere else.  The most important thing is for you and the twins to be safe,” he offered.

“But they might come after you as well.  You’re a Grayson,” she protested.  If anything, he and the twins needed to stay under the security’s protection.

“I can stay at the manor,” he assured her.

Marinette concentrated on Robert while she thought it through, running her fingers over his curls.  She wasn’t ready to go back to the way they were.  She didn’t trust him completely yet.  Or rather, she trusted him, she just didn’t know if she trusted him with her heart.  But she did trust him to keep her and the twins safe.  She did trust him to protect them and to act respectfully.  She trusted him to want to do what was best for them.

“No… why don’t we… why don’t we stay in the manor until we figure out where we want to go?  Relationship wise.” she finally offered resolutely.  Dick nodded in understanding.  There was no reason to build a home for the two of them if they weren’t going to live together.  Marinette and the twins would need security whether she stayed with him or not, but if they decided they didn’t want to get back together she should have a home of her own, away from him.  “We can have our own rooms and the twins can stay in mine for the first few months, until the likelihood of SIDS is lower.”

“Bruce has a few very large rooms in the manor, would you… how would you feel about us both staying in the room with the twins, but in different beds?  That way I can help better and you don’t have to do all the work by yourself,” he offered cautiously.  He didn’t want to scare her off by pushing too hard or rushing her.

Marinette studied him uncertainly.  That seemed awfully intimate, but at the same time, it would allow her some rest.  He could change diapers and help get them back to sleep…  “We can try it…”

“But if you start to feel uncomfortable, I can move to another room, immediately,” he assured her.  

Marinette nodded in agreement.  “Okay”

Dick smiled again, a relieved, excited smile.  He knew there was a lot to do.  He knew he still had a long way to go, but they were making progress.  They weren’t as bad as he thought they had been. “I know I have a lot to make up for and a lot to prove.  I know I messed up and I want to fix it.”

“What do you think you messed up,” she asked curiously.  

“I think I was so afraid of losing you, I got obsessed with eliminating any threats that might hurt you.  I… I couldn’t lose you like I lost my parents,” he answered honestly.  “That’s not an excuse,” he insisted quickly.  “It’s not an excuse because I know it doesn’t excuse my behavior.  It’s just my reasoning.  I didn’t even realize it until Lucius pointed it out at the fashion show.  He also pointed out that you wouldn’t have let me go. You would have pulled me out of my obsession, and I knew that.  So that’s why I didn’t tell you.

“I think that’s what I need to fix.  We’re supposed to be a team.  We were supposed to be in a relationship, but I was cutting you out.  I saw that I was hurting you, but I convinced myself I was saving you from something worse.  I think I messed up by cutting you out of my life.  I’m going to change that.”

She nodded at him with tears in her eyes.  “Okay.  You know it wasn’t the secrets, right?  You were allowed to have secrets.  I didn’t begrudge you that.  Hell, I have secrets I haven’t told you yet.”  She looked down at Lucy when she started making whimpering noises.  “Trade me,” she motioned for Lucy and held Robert out for him to take.  He gently handed Lucy off to Marinette to nurse and took Robert, loosening his swaddle so they could do skin to skin time.  “I want us to get to the point we don’t have secrets from each other, but we both deserve the time to figure out when we’ve reached that point.”

After a few minutes bouncing Robert, Dick looked back to Marinette with an open, vulnerable expression.  “I spoke with Commissioner Gordon,” he started slowly.  “And I quit the Titans.  I’m going to become a police officer in Gotham.  I’ll be here from now on.  There might still be things I can’t tell you because it’s police business, but you’ll know why I can’t tell you now.  And I know that doesn’t make up for everything I’ve done, but it’s a start.”

“Dick! You didn’t have to give up something you love for me!  That’s ridiculous.  Whether we get back together or not, you shouldn’t give up things you love to make someone else happy,” she exclaimed desperately.  The last thing she wanted was for him to give up parts of himself, parts that mattered to him, parts he might be bitter about having given up later.

Dick shook his head emphatically.  “I didn’t do it for you.  Well, not just you.  I was miserable whenever I was away.  I hated missing you and the twins.  I… I didn’t want to miss out on their lives like I missed out on the pregnancy.  I don’t want them growing up without me.” He sat back down next to her again to look her in the eye again, close enough for her to feel his breath on her face. “I won’t lie.  I want to go back to the way we were, but without the leaving and the lies.”  

He brushed her bangs out of her face and gently rubbed his thumb along her cheek. “I love you and waking up to you in my arms is one of the best parts of my life in the last few… years really. Kissing you, touching you, seeing your smile.  All of the things I got to do with you were magical.  I’d love to get that back, but I know I have work to do to get there. And I’m willing to put in the effort.”

“Dick…” she rested her head in the crux of his neck, angling Lucy away while she did.  “It’s going to take a while.”

“I know.  And I know we might never get back there, but I want to try.”  He kissed the top of her head and rested his head on hers.

Marinette looked back up at him and nodded.  “Let’s focus on getting the twins healthy and learning how to be parents. Then we can see how things feel.”

Dick smiled gently.  “Okay.”

She shook her head and turned her head back to rest against his neck.  “I owe Adrien 100 euros.  I bet him I wouldn’t end up with a hero.”

“Technically I’m a vigilante.  And we’re not together,” Dick corrected with a smirk, “… yet.”

She stared at him for a few moments before nodding resolutely.  “You know what?  I’ll take it.”

Chapter 29

Tags:

@dickinette-february @demonicbusiness @ichigorose @iloontjeboontje @ladybug-182 @toodaloo-kangaroo @dast218 @golden-promises @trippingovermyfeet @emimar7 @laurcad123 @lady-bee-fechin @thewitchwhowaited @redscarlet95 @jayjayspixiepop

[captainscanadian]

Long Way Home | Bucky Barnes x Reader (Part 2)

MY MASTERLIST

Series Masterlist

Summary: They meet again. 

Word Count: 2200+

Pairing: Doctor!Bucky Barnes x Doctor!Reader, Doctor!Steve Rogers, Nurse!Wanda Maximoff, Doctor!Pietro Maximoff

Warnings: Heart Disease, Hospital, Surgery. 

A/N: Give it up for another clusterfuck from yours truly. Thanks again to my dearest @dramadreamer14​ for the beta, as always. I haven’t written two parts in a day since a year ago so I got really excited to post this one. I DON’T DO TAGLISTS! Divider by @firefly-graphics​ <3

The moment he landed in Boston, Bucky Barnes decided to scratch his initial plan of heading to his new apartment, and instead took a cab from the airport to Massachusetts General Hospital. Despite the fact that he was not supposed to be starting his new job until the following week, receiving that email from Dr. Y/L/N about the Stark method patient had made him rather eager to get to work. Perhaps he was getting a little ahead of himself, but then again, he knew himself better than anyone else. There was no way he could have sat alone in his apartment for an entire week with his inherent need to operate. 

Not that he was expecting to operate immediately after he arrived at the hospital, given that the patient he had been wanting to work with was refusing surgery after all. If this patient had refused to let Tony Stark operate on her again, he knew that he would have a much more difficult time trying to convince her to let him operate on her. But Bucky was not someone who would walk away from a challenge, and this case was as challenging as it got. 

When he arrived at the hospital, he rushed inside and headed straight up to the Heart Center. He knew that he should probably check in with the new Chief of Surgery, maybe even inform him that his best friend had landed safely in Boston. But he had just been too eager to make it to his consultation, and he could see Steve when he was done. 

“Hi, I’m looking for Dr. Y/L/N’s office.” Bucky greeted the red haired woman at the Nurses’ Desk with a rather polite smile. 

Wanda Maximoff raised her eyebrow at the man who had just approached her, rolling her eyes as she was pulled away from her emails to give him directions. “I’m sorry, who?” She asked, as  the only Dr. Y/L/N she knew did not work here at the Heart Center. 

“Dr. Y/N Y/L/N? She requested a consult with me this afternoon. She should be expecting me.” He replied. “I’m Dr. James Barnes. I’m the new Chief of Cardio.”

The moment those words slipped through his mouth, Wanda found herself rising from her seat. “O-Oh… you’re… you’re the man of the house. I’m so sorry!” She was certain that he wasn’t supposed to be starting until next week. Had he come here incognito to spy on the department before he was going to take charge? No, that couldn’t be possible. He had just told her his name. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. It’s… it’s just been a long day. My apologies, Dr. Barnes.” 

Bucky let out a soft chuckle at her words and shook his head. “Hey, it’s no problem. I know I shouldn’t be here for a few days, but Dr. Y/L/N requested an emergency consult. Do you know where I can find her?”

“Um…” The nurse bit down on her bottom lip for a moment, not knowing how to break this to him. “Dr. Y/L/N doesn’t work here.” 

“I beg your pardon?”

“I mean, she doesn’t work here at the Heart Center.” She clarified. “Dr. Y/L/N is the Director of Neonatal Surgery. She runs the Newborn Developmental Follow-Up Clinic next door.” 

Bucky’s eyes grew wide at the response. “What?” 

First things first, it came as a surprise to him that a neonatal surgeon had requested a consult with him. After all, he specialized in Adult Congenital Heart Diseases, so naturally he was equipped to run Tony’s department following his retirement. Second of all, why was a neonatal surgeon requesting a consult for an adult patient? 

“You’ll be able to find her in the Blake Building next door. Would you like me to direct you there?” Wanda asked. “It’s not a long walk from here…” 

“Uh… no, I think I got it.” Bucky smiled politely at the woman. “But I would appreciate it if you could direct me to my office.” He was here, after all. He might as well get started with work. 

“Oh yes, of course.” She nodded, sitting back down in her seat. “Just give me one moment. I’ll just need to activate your key card and get you to sign a bunch of paperwork. Dr. Rogers gave me special instructions on which photo of yours to use for your profile.” 

Bucky let out a rather exhausted sigh. “Oh did he really?” He asked before shaking his head. 

“He said you insisted.” 

He leaned against the counter before shaking his head once again. “That punk.” 

“Is it true that you both attended Columbia together?” Wanda asked, rather curiously. “Word travels fast around this hospital.” 

“Yeah, we did. We grew up together, actually. I’ve known him since I was twelve years old.” He replied. 

“It’s amazing, isn’t it? Knowing someone when you’re a kid, and then having to work with them when you’re adults?” She remarked, closing her emails for a moment so that she could activate Dr. Barnes’ key card. 

“What makes you say that?” He asked, curiously. “Because you do sound like you’re speaking from experience.” 

“My fraternal twin, he works as a pediatric cardiologist. You'd think I'd gotten rid of him once I graduated from nursing school. But he went off to med school, and came back to work right here in this department. It’s quite the humbling experience." She explained, chuckling softly. “I know a thing or two about working with your best friend, but working for your best friend? I don’t know if I can help you with that, doc.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He nodded, laughing softly. “You know, I never got your name.”

“Wanda Maximoff.” 

“A pleasure to meet you, Wanda.” 

Following the formalities that needed to be completed before he could be let into his office, Dr. James Barnes eventually found himself logging onto his office computer and searching up a certain ‘Dr. Y/N Y/L/N’. 

Her employee profile on the hospital’s website stated that she was a triple board certified Neonatal Surgeon, and the Director of Neonatal Surgery. He had come across a series of articles on congenital heart diseases she had published in the medical journal within the last few years. Her LinkedIn profile mentioned that she had attended Harvard Medical School, and graduated Summa Cum Laude. 

As impressive as her credentials were, what caught his attention was not any of her accomplishments. It was the photo of her on her profile, and the familiarity that he felt upon seeing her eyes. For a moment, Bucky wondered if there was a time when their paths would have crossed. Perhaps, they had met at a conference of some sort, given that they both specialized in congenital heart diseases. But then again, if they had met recently, he would remember her, wouldn’t he? 

But as he pondered about where he would have met Dr. Y/L/N, he was pulled out of his thoughts by a knock on his door. 

“Come in.” Bucky called out, quickly closing all of his tabs. 

Steve Rogers stepped into his best friend’s office with a rather disappointed look on his face. “What in the goddamn world are you doing here, ya jerk?” 

“Nice to see you too, punk.” He chuckled, rising from his seat to pull him into an embrace. “I was going to come by your office, but I’ve got to head out for a consult in a bit.”

“A consult? Already?” Steve raised his brow. “Buck, you don’t start until next week.” 

“Says who?”

“Says me.” 

“You’re not the boss of me.” He rolled his eyes, even though he knew that Steve was indeed his boss. 

“Actually… I am.” He pointed out, a rather wide grin on his face. “All those years of being neck and neck with you and missing out on the ranks really paid off. I made Chief before you did, pal.” 

“Oh don’t be so full of yourself, buddy. I only took this job because you begged me to.” He reminded him. 

“Begging Is a stretch. I simply made a request.” Steve protested. “And I wanted my best friend to be closer to me.” 

“Aw you missed me, pal?” 

“Yeah, I did.” He admitted, a smile on his lips as he looked over at Bucky. “Best friends like you are rare to find, and easy to lose. Call me a sap all you want, Buck. But the last eight years haven’t been the same without you.” 

Needless to say, Steve wasn’t the only one who could say that. Someone could say that the last thirty years hadn’t been the same without him, if she even remembered him. 

Y/N’s morning had been spent doing rounds around the NICU, having barely walked around the entire floor before her feet began to ache. Two days it had been since they had started to ache, but she paid no heed to them, shrugging them off as the consequence for having stood in the OR for fifteen hours earlier that week. Unfortunately though, she knew the exact reason why her feet were aching. She was just too stubborn to accept that. 

“Pietro, I’m fine!” She exclaimed as her friend sat her down on the couch in her office and removed her shoes, noticing the swelling on her ankles before he gave her a look of utter disbelief. 

“You need to stop being so stubborn, Y/N.” He said, rather sternly. He wouldn’t yell at her, but he knew that she was being extremely negligent about her health ever since Dr. Stark had announced his retirement. “This isn’t normal, especially not for someone with a history of heart disease.” 

She knew that he was right. She knew that she was being stubborn, and that her symptoms were not normal. But with Tony retiring, she hadn’t managed to find that kind of trust in any other doctor. 

It had taken a lot of convincing on Tony’s part for her to even consider setting up a meeting with the new Chief of Cardio. But even then, she doubted if she could trust that man with her life. Perhaps her hesitance to go for surgery was not necessarily based on trust, but her own refusal to go back to the way things used to be when she had first left her hometown in Indiana and arrived in Boston at the age of five. 

Y/N Y/L/N had been a patient at Massachusetts General Hospital long before she had become the Director of Neonatal Surgery. She had spent months on end being admitted in the same Pediatrics Ward where she currently worked, missing out on her life as a normal kid even though she had been surrounded by children her own age. Her normal had been different than most people, and she refused to return to that state yet again. She had come so far, and worked so hard, to go back to that dark place. 

“I have a consultation with the Chief of Cardio later today, okay?” She assured him, as though it was progress in her eventually agreeing for surgery. “I’ll have a chat with him and see what we can do about this.” 

Surgery was out of the question for Y/N. She was not going to have anyone cut into her chest again, not with the way her last surgery had caused her a massive lifestyle change. She had given up her entire life to ensure that she was staying healthy. But if that hadn’t been enough, then what even was the point? 

“And if he suggests surgery?” Pietro questioned. “What would you do if he tells you that he needs to operate, just like Stark did?” Given her condition, even he knew that surgery was the best option. 

“I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it, Pietro.” She admitted, letting out a sigh of exhaustion as she leaned back against the couch. “You should get back to work. I’m just going to put my feet up for a bit.” 

God, could anyone be as stubborn as Y/N Y/L/N? Pietro Maximoff had no idea. “Okay, but don’t walk around too much. I’ll ask Romanoff if she could handle your patients for the day. Just stay in your office, okay? This isn’t a good sign.” 

“I know, I know… just go.” 

Pietro could only hope that she listened to him and stayed put in her office for the rest of the day, but it seemed that she had dozed off as he was leaving her office. 

“If the doctors don’t fix you, then I’ll become a doctor and I’ll fix you, Bambi.”

“You would be the best doctor in the whole wide world!”

Suddenly, there was a knock on her door as Y/N found herself waking up from her nap. She checked the time on her watch to see that she hadn’t been asleep for too long. That had to be Dr. Barnes, right? 

“Come on in!” She called out, quickly removing her feet from the coffee table and slipping them into her shoes. 

As Bucky walked into Dr. Y/L/N’s office, there were a thousand questions that he wanted to ask her. But not even one of them was, ‘Hey Bambi, would you let me keep my promise now?’ 

[pagingevilspawn]

Would you please write a fic about alex behaviour with children like the way he comforts them or help them through?

heart of gold

hey there! i’m not gonna lie when i say that this prompt took me forever to figure out, but when i did i was super excited! 

this is mainly Alex centric with a bit of jolex added in (obviously). i hope you like it!

___

Of all people to notice Alex Karev’s strange ability to work well with children first, no one would’ve expected it to be Cristina Yang. 

It was fairly early in their intern year, and both she and Karev were on the pediatrics rotation with Dr. Keith, someone who they could both agree was an arrogant son of a bitch that thought way too highly of himself for his own good. 

They’d been trailing behind him like lost puppies all day, listening to him go on and on while he talked to the patient’s families, not even bothering to ask his interns any questions. He always thought that interns were a waste of time and space. He’s much rather have at least a third year resident on his service, but no such luck. They felt like crap and both wanted to kick the guy in the ass, but knew that the only thing that would do is get them knocked out of the program. 

Six hours into their shift, the two were about to head to the cafeteria for a much desired lunch break when their pagers rang out, loud groans escaping their mouths at the noise they had come to detest the last couple of weeks. 

All Alex really wanted was a slice of the hospital’s pizza. Granted, the crust tasted like cardboard, the cheese was old, and the sauce had no flavor, but he was craving it like crazy. He hadn’t gone out for groceries recently, so the only thing that was stocked in the shelves of his small apartment was cereal, some oatmeal, and off brand, nearly expired crackers that he had since he finished med school a couple of months ago. He had --for some unknown reason-- shoved them into a backpack that had made it with him as he traveled from Iowa to Washington, completely untouched. 

With a huff he turns on his heel and makes his way to the pit where he was being paged, purposefully avoiding eye contact with the nurse he disrespected on his first day, along with the ones he’d slept with and hadn’t called back. He had a pretty large list of nurses who didn’t like him, and he didn’t feel like making that list any longer. Not today, at least. 

Keith instructed him to go cast an arm for the seven year old in bed six, while Yang was told to go stitch up the cut on the little girl in bed two. 

When Alex was done he passed by Yang’s area, watching as she was trying to calm down the little girl who couldn’t be more than five. The girl had tears streaming down her face and was nuzzled into the mom’s chest. The mother was glaring at the female doctor, who was saying something Alex could make out as “it’s not even scary, it’s just a needle.” 

All he really wanted to do was get that damn pizza slice, and he had every intention of doing so, but seeing Yang be absolutely hopeless at getting anywhere with the little girl, he felt a bit of sympathy-- not for his fellow intern, but for the kid. 

With a sigh he strides over to the bed, watching as the raven head’s mouth opens to speak, cutting her off immediately. “Let me handle this.” he says, reaching to grab the needle from her head. 

Cristina glares at him, her expression turning into one of disgust. No way was she going to let Evil Spawn steal her patient, no matter how much she wished she’d be doing anything else. 

“Karev-”

“--Yang!” he cuts her off sharply, plucking the needle from her hand and bumping her out of the way. Not the nicest thing to do, but she was practically terrifying the little girl. There was no way she would trust the doctor now. 

His coworker scoffs, huffing a ‘fine’ before she goes to stand back and watch the scene, more than eager to watch the man fail. What good could he do? The girl was crying the second she had taken the disinfectant out. 

Alex pulls up a chair, grabbing the attention of the little girl, who looks up from her mother’s chest for a second, only to dive back in right after. 

“Hey kid, my name’s Doctor Karev. You mind telling me your’s?” he asks gently, slipping on a pair of gloves and flashing a signature crooked grin. 

The girl makes eye contact warily, slightly unlatching from her mom's tight hold at the sight of the man’s smile. The other doctor looked super serious, it was kind of scary. 

“Piper.” she answers, wiping the tears from under her eyes, the mom flashing him a grateful smile. 

“Hey Piper.” he grins. “I see you got hurt up there. What happened?” he wettens the pad with disinfectant, keeping his eyes on the little blonde, knowing it would mean less questions if she was focused on his face. 

“I was jumping on the couch and then I fell and hit the table.” she explains, Alex inspecting the cut to see if her story was reliable. He knew firsthand what it was like to come up with excuses for the bruises on your face, and wanted to make sure that she wasn’t just trying to cover up for something else that happened. 

Luckily, the combination of the authenticity of the bruise and the level of trust the daughter had in her mom let him know that she really did do what she said. He knew at some point he was gonna need to not assume the worst in every parent that came in with an injured kid, but the wound was still fresh for him, and it would take some time to heal-- a long time.

“Well then Piper, I’m gonna need to clean your cut, but it’s gonna sting a bit. Is that okay?” he asks her, her green eyes widening, but eventually nodding. The doctor seemed nice enough. 

He cleans the wound, turning back at the girl when he pulls out a needle, watching as her face begins to look panicked. “Hey, it’s okay.” he reassures her. His eyes dart around, noticing a backpack that sat in the corner, decorated with a multitude of princesses. 

“Who’s your favorite princess?” he asks her, drawing Piper’s attention away from the scary needle in his hands. 

“Belle.” she answers, a small smile making its way to her face. She loved talking about the princess’s and would chatter on about them anytime, any day, anywhere.  

Alex smirks, letting out a sigh of relief. He knew all about Belle, since it was Amber’s all time favorite Disney movie. He’d seen it more time than he’d like to admit, and practically had the whole film memorized since he was fourteen.

“I like Belle too. She’s super brave huh? Never afraid of the Beast or anything.” he gives her a smile, watching as Piper’s face lights up, a wide, toothless smile splayed on her lips. 

“Yeah! She’s so cool! She never lets the beast tell her what to do!” she exclaims, making Alex chuckle. She reminded Alex a lot of his little sister, with her dirty blonde hair, green eyes, and passion for princesses. 

“Okay, well, right now I’m gonna need you to be super brave like Belle alright? And sit really really still, like she does when she reads a book. Can you do that for me Piper?” he smirks mischievously. 

The little girl grins. She always wanted to be like her favorite princess, so she definitely wouldn’t pass up an opportunity to act like one. She already practiced around the house, so she was definitely going to practice in front of the nice doctor who looked like Prince Philip.  

Cristina stood frozenly in the background, mouth opened so wide it could catch flies. Who knew Karev was so good with kids? She sure as hell didn’t.  

She watches as he stitches up the cut, saying some reassuring words every time the girl flinches or squeezes her eyes shut. It was about twenty minutes later when he finished, Yang still standing there in shock. She sees him dress the wound, getting up from his chair and say, “All done. You did awesome Piper, but no more jumping on the couch, alright?” which earns him a nod. He flashes a friendly wink to the mom, who blushes as he walks away, forgetting entirely about Yang’s presence as he makes his way to the cafeteria to finally get his hands on the pizza slice he’s been drooling about for hours.

Maybe Evil Spawn wasn’t so evil after all. 

~*~

Miranda Bailey was exhausted. Between Tuck and trying to begin a pediatric fellowship, all she wanted to do was lie down and sleep for god knows long. Tucker being difficult about their shared custody schedule seemed to only add to her fatigue and she swore on her life that she could crash on the nearest gurney and not wake up for three days straight. 

It was with a heavy sigh she begrudgingly made her way back down to the NICU, remembering that she had left Karev there the day before after administering the kangaroo hold. She knew that by now he had probably dispersed, but she felt like checking on the little baby herself, just to make sure that the preemie was doing okay.

When she arrived at the NICU doors she could see a few faces that she recognized standing outside the window, talking in hushed conversations as they stared at the scene in front of them with imploring eyes, that is, until the one she knew as Reed rushed away-- a friend at her side, finishing their conversation quickly. 

Miranda shakes her head. Though she had softened over the years, everyone still feared the inner ‘Nazi’ that came out from time to time. When she finishes gowning herself she makes her way into the room, stopping in front of the shirtless, sleeping figure on a chair. Surprised was the only word she was able to come up with, though it seemed like an understatement of the century. Alex Karev was sitting there, with a sleeping baby curled contently against his chest, her tiny breaths in sync with the man who was holding her. 

She shakes her head, stopping a few feet from where the man sat. “Karev?” she says, making him open his groggy eyes, blinking as he does so to look around for the source of the noise, relaxing when he knows that no monitors are going off and the baby on his chest is still very much alive. 

“Did you stay here all night?” she asks softly, watching as he looks out the window to see that it was in fact daytime, not evening like it was before he’d fallen asleep.

He takes another look at the baby in his arms, “Um, yeah. I… I guess I did.” he trails off, his voice rough since he barely was awake.  

“Go home, get some rest. The nurse will take over for you.” Miranda scolds. These interns (who were now residents) were like her children, her babies, and as much as the sight warmed her heart, she needed her babies to be well rested. She couldn’t have them falling asleep in the middle of surgery. 

He unintentionally pulls the tiny bundle of pink a bit closer, “No. Uh, I- I’m okay. I’m… good here.” 

She lets out a small, barely there laugh, but not at him. She’d seen the soft side of Alex Karev, but it was few and far between. Everyone knew that the rough exterior he put up was just to stop himself from getting hurt, but this… this side was new. She had never seen him more vulnerable than he was right now, the baby sleeping so soundly on his chest that it seemed like no amount of noise could disturb her. 

“Well, you'd be good in Peds, you know that?” she flicks her gaze from him to the baby. “You get invested. You have good instincts. You stick to your instincts,” she continues, Alex looking down at the child, making some kind of face she wouldn’t know how to describe. 

“You’d be good in Peds, Karev.” she walks away, leaving Alex alone with his thoughts. 

Maybe, just maybe, kids would be the one thing that would allow Karev to show everyone who he really was. 

~*~         

Alex Karev had sort of snuck up on Arizona Robbins. When he said that he was interested in Peds, she truly thought that he was joking, just trying to say something to either get a laugh out of her or annoy her. 

She didn’t know much about Karev, all she really knew was what she had heard from the nurses gossiping loudly at their stations, and the occasional input from Callie here and there. All she really knew was that he had been married to Stevens, who had cancer, then they later got divorced, and before he was married he had earned himself quite a bit of a ‘man-whore’ reputation, nearly as bad as Mark’s. 

Arizona was weary about Karev, so imagine her surprise when she saw his face light up as a kid called him Doctor Alex for the first time. 

The first time she’d ever had the young man on her service she knew that he was cold, arrogant, and a bit too cocky for his own good. He was overall an asshole, and to say Robbins wasn’t happy to have him on her service was an understatement. Bailey had said something to her recently about Karev, but that didn’t lessen her lack of enjoyment about his upcoming arrival on her floor. 

When the man did arrive, he was seven minutes late for rounds, dumping an empty cup of hospital bought coffee in the nearest trash can. He flashed her a crooked grin, apologizing for his tardiness, but not explaining why.

Arizona sighed, rolling her eyes discreetly. She wasn’t normally a strict teacher, but one thing she didn’t like was when her residents were late. The lives of tiny humans were in their hands, no second could be wasted-- much less seven minutes.

“Welcome to peds Doctor Karev…” She starts off, telling him about how pediatrics wasn’t wiping kid’s noses and cuddly bunnies all day long. Peds was hardcore, only for the elite. 

She stops outside room 414, turning back to Karev and giving him as stern of a glare as she could muster. “Remember Karev, smile, engage. These are kids we’re talking about here.” 

Alex rolls his eyes. He knew he wasn’t the nicest guy. He was an ass, a douche, and definitely not the man most women would be proud to take home to their parents. But if there was one thing he did know, it was kids. He practically raised one for god’s sake.  

“Got it Robbins.” he huffs, fixing his posture as the two walk into the room, where a little boy sat on his bed, playing with his colorful toys that sat on his lap, anxious parents sitting in chairs beside him. 

Arizona flashes a grin to the family, directing her attention back to the boy. “Hi Nico, how are we doing today?” 

Nico shrugs, mustering a half-hearted smile. “I’m okay.” he answers, more focused on his toys than the doctors in the room.

“Well that’s good,” she jots something down on her chart. “This is Dr. Alex. He’s gonna be another one of your doctors, okay Nico?” 

“Doctor Alex?” the boy confirms, making Arizona look up from her chart and Alex look back at the boy. 

She saw it then. The way his eyes lit up at the name, how a crooked grin unconsciously made its way to his lips. He had it. The peds glow. 

“Hey dude.” Alex smirks, trying to hide is bubbling excitement. He liked that name, ‘Doctor Alex’. It was different from Karev. It was lighter, easier, it sounded right. Doctor Karev was too… but Doctor Alex? Doctor Alex sounded pretty great. 

Arizona bites her lip as she watches her resident and the patient interact, trying to keep her smile at bay. 

There it is. There’s the real Alex Karev. 

~*~ 

Jo Wilson sat in the intern’s locker room, knotting up the ties of her scrub pants as she listened to the chief resident rattle of names of who the intern’s were with that day. She was more than thankful for a new service, since Medusa was downright terrifying, but she was really hoping that she wouldn’t be assigned to-

“--Wilson you’re with Doctor Karev on Peds.”

Shit. 

She was sure Karev was a great doctor, I mean, he wouldn’t be here-- at one of the best hospitals in the world-- if he sucked. 

But she’d already heard enough about Karev to say that she didn’t like him, not one bit. So far she’d witnessed Leah crying into her locker about why he wouldn’t answer her calls, nurses complain to each other about why he hadn’t texted, and other interns chattering at bars about why he acted like he didn’t know them when they saw each other again.

In conclusion, he was a grade-A jackass who slept with any female that had two legs, and she was certainly not going to be the next one on his (extensive) list of conquests. No sir-ee. 

With a huff she ties her hair back, giving Stephanie a deadpan look after she whispers a “Good luck. Make sure not to sleep with him.” 

There was no way she would be sleeping with Karev, not in a million years. She had heard so much from others that she could already paint a picture-

Ew, no. That’s gross. 

Either way, there was nothing he could ever say to make her fall in bed with him. Nothing at all. 

…

She was exhausted. Karev was an ass. An ass who didn’t hate her, but was still an insufferable asshole. Jo stood at the nurses station, leaning over the counter as she filled out her charts, scribbling down her notes angrily. He made her angry. 

Though she had to admit, seeing him all freaked out over her (fake) crying was pretty hilarious. 

“--Wilson!” she hears her name being called by her asshole of a superior. She turns around, plastering such a faux smile on her face that she felt nauseated just knowing that it was there. 

She’s about to respond when Doctor Grey comes running up to him, shoving a toddler in his arms, taking him by surprise. 

“Alex. I need you to watch her.” the blonde pleads, making him scrunch his eyebrows. 

“Mer I-” 

“Please.” Meredith begs, Alex giving her a crooked grin as he takes ahold of his niece. If there was one thing that could make Alex Karev smile without even trying, it was Zola Grey Shepherd, a two and a half year old little fireball.  

A large grin comes across the little girl’s face as she looks at the man in front of her. “Unca Lex!” she exclaims, clasping her tiny hand on the side of his face. 

“Hi Ms. Zozo,” he smiles, Jo not even noticing how the corner’s of her mouth quirked up at the sight. This was not the Doctor Karev she’d been with these past few hours, this was someone completely new. This was… Alex? 

Meredith sighs. “I have on OB appointment, and normally we’d take her, but she’s just been so fussy lately, and when I tried to take her to daycare she threw a fit-”

Alex cuts her off, “Mer, it's fine. I got her.” he reassures her, pretending to bite the little girl’s finger as it came close to his face, causing her to let out a loud squeal. 

“Okay but-”

He rolls his eyes at the blonde, “Mer, go. She’ll be completely fine.” he smirks. “We all know that she likes me better than you and Shep combined so…” 

Meredith hits him on the shoulder before she turns and waddles down the hall, leaving Alex with a toddler in his arms that was giggling as he tickled her, and an intern who wasn’t quite sure what she was seeing in front of her. 

It was obvious that he had some skills with children, he was a pediatric surgeon for crying out loud. But nobody told her he was this good with kids.She watched as a large smile came across his face, a laugh escaping his mouth at Zola’s squeals and giggles. 

Maybe Alex Karev wasn’t as much of an asshole that she thought he was. 

~*~ 

Nothing was more perfect to him than the sight in front of him. 

Never in a million years did he ever think that he would get to where he was now. 

Alex sat next to his wife as they stared down at the little baby on her chest, her pink cheeks puffed up while her eyes were tightly squeezed closed as she tried to sleep. She was so perfect. So, so perfect.  

A daughter. 

He had a daughter. 

A little bundle of pink that weighed a whole six pounds, seven ounces. Yet somehow, she had managed to take his heart out of his chest and hold it in her tiny, tiny palm. 

Nothing could’ve prepared him for how much he already loved his little girl. He’d heard about it, read about it. He’d been in the room when parents met their child for the first time. But this? This was a whole new level of love, something he wasn’t prepared for in the slightest. 

He watched as Jo ran her thumb delicately over the baby girl’s cheeks, tears streaming down Jo’s face. It had been all of two minutes since they welcomed their daughter into the world and she hadn’t stopped crying since. 

Although he wasn’t crying, his throat was built up as he stared at his perfect little girl. A full head of wavy light brown hair sat on top of her head, her rosy lips pouted as she nestled closer to her mother’s chest. 

Perfect. 

That’s the only word that could describe the tiny figure that laid before him.

He rubs his pinky finger over her little fist, watching as it unfolds and grabs it with all of her strength. 

He can feel his heart physically clench, never before had something felt as right as feeling his little girl’s palm around his finger. 

Alex grins, placing a small kiss on the top of Jo’s head, a silent way of saying so many different things at once. 

Thank you. 

You did so well. 

You’re so strong. 

She’s so perfect. 

I love you.

Thank you for marrying me.

Thank you for loving me. 

Thank you for everything.  

Thank you.

Jo readjusts the baby on her chest, bringing her up higher for them to see. 

She lets out a watery smile, her bottom lips trembling as she stares at the tiny girl that she would do anything for. “Hi sweet girl.” she whispers, not even bothering to wipe the water droplets that cascaded down her cheeks. 

Alex lets out a crooked grin, a small laugh escaping his throat in disbelief. This perfect creation was his daughter. How was that even possible?  

“Welcome to the world Lorelei Karev.” he whispers, unable to focus on anything except the tiny girl that he would give up the sun, the moon, and the stars for. 

“We love you so much.” Jo speaks softly, looking up at her husband, the love of her life, her eyes saying more than her mouth ever could. 

Thank you. 

I love you. 

She’s so perfect. 

Thank you for her. 

Thank you for everything. 

Thank you for loving me. 

Thank you.  

They share a small kiss, reveling in the moment they knew they would remember for the rest of their lives. 

It was then he defied all odds. Overcame all of his fears. He wasn’t going to be like his dad, what everyone told him he was going to be. He was going to be an amazing dad, and he knew it.

As it turns out, kids truly were the one thing that could show everyone who the real Alex Karev was after all.

[sweetchup]

A Helping Hand 3: Feverish

Type: Shalnark x reader

Au?: Savior Au

Word Count: 4,000+

Warnings: Hospital, Cursing, Sexual innuendos, Angst, Slight lemon, and Shalnark being a Shark.

Author Note: Here’s the 3rd part to the helping hand series. I decided to do a shorter one this time but make it a slower build up and much more drama. Do you guys think I should perhaps do some Christmas or New Years special for this one?

<—(Pt.2) / (Pt.4)—>

Helping Hand Masterlist

“Wait, (Y/n) is coming back soon?” Shalnark says, repeating what Clara had just said. He quickly stops his typing to look at Lara and Clara checking to see if they were messing with him or not. It had been almost 2 weeks since (y/n) had taken a paid leave after the incident with Jeremiah. She had stopped by a bunch of times during the first week to check up on Shalnark but had soon stopped visiting when Clara and Lara reassured her that they would personally take care of Shalnark in her absence.

“She sure is! I just got a call from her saying she’ll be coming back in a week, though it is a night shift so you won’t see her until later in the day.” Lara says, nudging him and wiggling her eyebrows. Clara looks at the two before going back to her task while shaking her head, knowing what was about to happen next.

A thick hostile bloodlust fills the room as Shalnark smiles over to Clara. Though it was anything but friendly.

“H-hey I was just joking Shal-l. Come on we are buds, aren’t we?” Lara chokes out, moving away from the man.

“I don’t believe I stated that.”

“Ahh come on—“ A giggle cuts Lara off. Confused, she turns to stare at the new woman who had entered the room. With furrowed eyebrows, Lara looked at Clara who only returned the same confused face back. Who was this woman? It was obvious she was a nurse, but her uniform was that of someone who was located in the NICU. She had no business being in this room.

“Umm who are you?” Clara asks, looking between Shalnark and the woman. Shalnark only shrugs in response, seeming to also not know who she is.

“Oh, how rude of me. I’m Moxxi, I just came in to check up on our little patient here.” She responds cheerfully but her full attention seemed to be on Shalnark not the other two. Strutting past Lara, she leans over and puts a hand on his forehead. Ever so slightly, the three watch as she purposely sticks out her cleavage towards Shalnark. “I’m just going to check you for your temperature, okay?”

The other two glare at Moxxi, highly annoyed, but Shalnark just continues smiling, afterall, many years of practice wouldn’t cause him to break in a time like this. Though, in his head, he was thinking about how she might actually be the most shameless woman he had ever seen.

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to stop you there.” Clara speaks up, fixing her glasses in slight annoyance as she does so.

“What do you mean? I’m a nurse. I doubt you two cafeteria workers are fit for a job…,” Moxxi mockingly looks the two up and down before continuing, “...such as this one.”

Both flinch and glare at her more but before they can even have a chance to rebut Shalnark cuts them off. “These two are friends of mine and have been taking care of me for a couple of weeks. So far, I think they have been doing a great job at taking care of me.”

Moxxi attempts to cut Shalnark off but he just continues on, “Though on the other hand, it is quite unnerving for you to attempt to take care of me when your shirt clearly says you are part of the NICU. I think you should run along and go back to your actual job, someone might actually need you.”

A silence falls upon the room as Shalnark looks at Moxxi in the eyes, challenging her to disagree with what he was saying. The three of them thought she would have begun to run out of the room like the other nurses but for some reason, her laughter suddenly fills the room.

“You're cute. I’ll come visit you some other time.” With one last touch on Shalnark’s shoulder, Moxxi finally leaves the room. Though as she leaves, it was clear to everyone in the room that her actions had caught Shalnark off guard as he freezes in his spot.

Once the door of the room finally shuts, Lara finally voices her anger.

“WHAT IN THE BULL-HORNED ARSE WAS THAT?! LIKE SERIOUSLY, WHO DID THE PLASTIC—“

As Lara continues to voice her anger, shalnark finally comes to and grits his teeth while also dropping his smile. He was correct, she might be the most pathetic woman he had ever met. If only he had his cell phone and antenna on him. He would actually for the first time ever enjoy breaking a toy like her.

Taking a large inhale and exhale in an attempt to calm himself down, he returns his attention back to his computer to continue coding. Perhaps he could threaten the nurse who does the afternoon shift into giving him his phone back.

—.—.—.—.—

Lightly, you blow on the spoon holding the hot sauce like liquid. Once the liquid seemed cooled enough you tasted it before shaking your head. It definitely needed more salt. Adding a pinch of salt, you stir the pot one more time. Attempting to take another taste, you are suddenly cut off by the sudden ringing noise of your phone.

Placing the spoon down you check who was calling. How unusual, it was an unknown caller. Quickly peering a glance at the time, it seemed to still not make sense. Clara, Lara and Mal should still be making their way home from work, so you don’t know who would be calling at this hour.

Answering your cell, you put the phone up to your ear while going back to stir the pot. “Hello?”

“Hi (y/n)! It’s Shal!”

“Shal?!” How did he get his phone back? Wait, how did he even get your number? Actually, why were you even asking that. It was pretty obvious he probably got his cellphone back through threatening or just by stealing it. He also probably just easily hacked into the Hospital’s database to get your number. “How are you?”

“Actually I’m doing pretty well. I’m just cooking some dinner for me right now. Nothing exciting.”

“Oh really?” Shalnark smiles to himself. Leaning against his bed, he stares out the window into the lit up city. He still can’t get over the fact your voice always sounds just so pleasant to him. “What are you having?”

“Just some pasta with tomato sauce? Nothing really special.” You say laughing a bit at the end. With the euphoric sound of your laughter hitting his ears, Shalnark feels his face heat up in embarrassment and he ends up tucking his face into his knees to hopefully calm the fluttering beat of his heart. Even with you being miles away, you still somehow have this effect on him.

“Oh really? I bet it will taste amazing.”

Out of your control, you feel your face heat up at Shalnark’s compliment and you bite your lip to hold back the feeling of wanting to scream, “I guess so. It’s a new recipe but I don’t think I did it right.”

“Oh well. Don’t worry about it, it will at least taste better than having the cafeteria food I had for dinner.” Shalnark can’t help but giggle as you let out a surprised gasp.

“Shal. You know Clara and Lara would kick your butt if they heard you say such a thing!”

“I know. I’m only messing with you.”

A silence fills the air between you two. However, it’s not awkward at all. It’s surprisingly actually rather pleasant.

“Hey Shal?” Shalnark humms to let you know he was listening. “I-I—“

You pause at what you were going to say. Your face a deep crimson as you press your forehead against the cold countertop. You can’t tell him how you feel. Not like this. Lifting you head up, you look determined out the window. You were going to tell him in person as soon as you came back. You were positive about it.

“H-how was your day?”

“It was okay.”

“Just okay?” You repeat. Usually Shalnark would go into a tangent about what sort of item he coded today or diss some sort of video game that didn’t suit his taste.

“Yeah. It was kind of a boring day but… do you happen to know of a nurse named Moxxi? She works in the…”

“NICU?” You say finishing his sentence as you dish out a plate of food for yourself. Taking a bite, you let out a small sigh. You were correct from before, you added too much olive oil to the sauce. Oh well, better luck next time

“You know of her?”

“Yeah. I don’t personally know her but I’ve heard of her. She’s well known in the hospital for…” You massage the back of your neck as you think. How should you exactly approach this topic, you wonder. “Sleeping around with her patient’s… partners..”

“Really?!”

“Yeah… she’s not well liked with management per say especially now that she has switched to other patients from other sectors and even other doctors. But it’s hard to deny she’s good at her job so they don’t want to fire her.”

“Oh I see.”

“Yeah… she hasn’t tried to approach you has she?”

“She did today. Though, Clara and Lara were with me as well.”

“Okay.” You let out a loud sigh. Of course this had to be happening while you were out on leave.

“You okay, (y/n)?”

“Y-yeah. Of course. Just try to stay away from her, she might try something.”

“Well yeah. I don’t want to be getting like 4 STDs.”

“Shal!” You yell laughing with him.

—.—.—.—.—

“(Y/n).”

That was the last time you talked to Shalnark, almost a week ago and finally you were back at the hospital, working. You had been given the occasional update by Lara and Clara but both had been very busy with their jobs recently. So they couldn’t be there every time Moxxi tried to go to Shalnark but they believe they caught most of it.

“(Y/n)”

You really wanted to go check up Shalnark to see if what that nurse had been up to. But you were just so busy right now, practically slammed with cases. God, this was just so extremely frustrating to you. What if he actually decided to flirt back? Just the thought of him flashing his smile at some other girl or leaning over her to explain some sort of game. It just made your heart ache so much. Maybe you should have actually confessed your feelings over the phone.

“(Y/n)!” You flinch at the loud voice, turning around frantically to see it was Mal who had called you.

“Sorry Mal. I was just reviewing this case and I got—“

“(Y/n)...” Mal says cutting you off and grabbing the piece of paper from your hand. “That patient was dispatched to another sector almost an hour ago.”

“A-ah. Sorry. I-I—“

“I swear…” The elderly lady says, shaking her head. “Are you worried about the male patient of yours again?”

“Umm I—“ You attempt to lie but the look Mal gives you shuts downs the thought of doing that. In defeat and embarrassment, you avoid your eyes from hers and nervously rub the back of your neck.

“Go.”

“Huh?”

“Most of the patients have been taken care of and we have more than enough staff available tonight. Why don’t you go and check up on him?”

“Y-you sure?”

“Why yes. It is one of your general tasks isn’t it?” She says slipping a key card into your hand.

“A key card? Mal, what’s this for?”

“Oh yeah I guess they haven’t told you. They place keycards onto the entrance doors of the long term room that activate at night. Apparently a certain nurse has been slipping in and out of the rooms at night. They are trying to counter it.”

Your stomach drops and you give a small nod in affirmation. Could Shal and Moxxi be? Giving a curt bow to excuse yourself, you walk throughout the hallways to get to his room. Though the more you thought about it the more impatient you got and before you knew it, you were practically sprinting to get to his room. Even something as simple as waiting to take the elevator seemed to take too long. So instead you ran up all 5 flights of stairs.

Winded, you decide to just jog the rest of the way to get to his room. Though as soon as you reach the door, you pause. With your heart hammering, you were unsure of what to do next and unsure of what could possibly be on the other side. Were you ready to come face to face with something that could practically crush you? Deciding to not knock you just swing the door open and—

You breathe out a sigh of relief. There was no Moxxi in the room. Only Shalnark. Just sleeping ever so peacefully. Even if you still didn’t know if something happened between them while you weren’t here, it at least calmed the aching in your heart to see that she wasn’t in the room alone with him.

Carefully as to not wake him up, you take a seat on his bedside. Observing him and the room around you, you check his clipboard to see how he had been doing without you.

According to the other nurse, he had been cooperative with doing his daily PT and other sessions. He also hasn’t been missing out on any meals nor needed any new meds. So far, everything seems to be good and not out of the ordinary. Though as soon as you thought that your eyes caught something written in the bottom corner in red.

“Patient has been experiencing vivid nightmares and usually unable to sleep…”

But... Shalnark seems to be doing okay for tonight. Hesitantly, you reach over and place a hand on his forehead.

“Holy!” You shoot up in surprise. His temperature was extremely hot. Finally examining more of him you see that his skin was also flushed, covered in a slight sweat shine and his breathing was labored. Why hadn’t anyone seen this? He should have had vitals and blood tests today.

Checking the clipboard again, you are shocked to see that his vitals and blood test were perfectly fine. What was exactly going on? A virus like this needs time to build up. They should have been able to—

You pause your tangent. Could it be? Activating your Gyo, you gasp slightly as you see a foreign aura flowing throughout his body and in his aura.

A transmitter. But how did they exactly transmit their aura into him…

Looking around the room, your eyes catch the strange aura covering his food and water. You knew Clara and Lara couldn’t have possibly done this as they had the day off. Checking the clock you realize that dinner was served only 20 minutes ago, meaning the perpetrator was probably still in the building.

Sprinting across the room, you dial the security office number.

“Hello Paul speaking.”

“Paul!”

“Doctor (y/n)! Hello dear I—“

“Sorry but no time for that. I have a patient who may have been poisoned through his food by a Nen user.” While still on the landline phone you make your way over to Shal and draw a cool cloth to attempt to slowly cool down his temperature.

“What?!”

“Yeah I know it’s hard to believe but I need you to check the camera’s and catch that person immediately. Bring Gano with you, his ability will come in handy to question them. I need to find out what they exactly did to him so I can get it out of his system.”

“I’ll find them right away and will call you back.”

As soon as Paul hangs up the phone you prep all the possible medications and necessities you could need to help Shal. You also, in a last resort, got a private doctor who specialized in Nen exorcism on ready to be called down. While changing Shalnark’s washcloth you got a call back from Paul.

“Hello? Paul?”

“(Y/n)! We are on the way to catch them. It’s a nurse named Moxxi from NICU.” You curse under your breath. Of course it was her. “We found out that she can change her aura into different substances animals make. She drugged her aura into the Hallucigen properties of the Bufo toad. It also seemed she had just left the patient's room to use the restroom near NICU when you had come up. She—“

“Hallucigen? Are you sure?” Quickly you race to the shelf and grab the dictionary of side effects of different animals. Why was he having a fever if it was only an hallucigen.

“Yes. Hey! Stop her! I have to go, she's running away. Don’t worry about anything Miss (y/n). Gano took a quick look online and saw that the toad wasn’t deadly or poisonous.” Before you can ask anything more he hangs up. You knit your brows in confusion as you flip throughout the pages. If it’s not poisonous or deadly then why would she use it?

“(Y-y/n)...” A voice croaks out. Whipping your head around, you see Shalnark was awake and attempting to get up.

“Sit down,” With the book still in your hand you make your way to him, “Shal you need to lay back down—“

Suddenly, you're caught off guard as Shalnark pulls you towards him. This was just getting even more strange by the minute. Normally, Drugged individuals should be feeling quite weak now and not want to move.

“Shal! You—“ Your eyes widen in surprise as he suddenly grabs the back of your head. Your heart practically bursts as he captures your lips in a feverish kiss. Desperately, while he kissed you, his hands mingled up and down your body. Attempting to grab and explore at any possible skin he could reach.

Releasing your lips with a small moan, he moves his lips to explore up and down the available area of your neck.

“Shal!” You moan out as he bites at a certain area of his neck. Groaning back in satisfaction at your willing response, he pulls the rest of your body on top of him.

You let out a small stuttery gasp as his hands massage at your hips.

“Shal. Shal. St-Stop it’s the—“ Another gasp falls from your lips as his hand teasingly drops a little below the waistband of your pants. There was no doubt in your mind now. Moxxi attempted to drug Shalnark with an aphrodisiac. A substance that can increase someone’s sexual desire, sexual pleasure, or sexual behavior.

You were glad that it wasn’t anything bad and all he needed to do was get the substance out of his system. But, by just waiting and allowing time to pass could easily solve this problem as well. You weren’t about to take advantage of his drugged up like-state.

Clumsily, you run your fingers through his hair and push his face from out of your neck.

“S-Shal. Look at me.” Your breath hitches as you can finally get a clear look at his blown out eyes. He was clearly out of it. “Shal. Let’s stop, you don’t want to do this. It’s the—“

“N-no. (Y/n) please” Shalnark pleads, grabbing your hand to stop you as you attempt to get off his lap. He quickly pulls you back to give you a soft kiss on your lips but you quickly away. “I want this. Please. God, I’ve missed you so much. You don’t know how much I’ve waited for this. I-I-...”

He pauses for a second before looking you in the eyes, “I love you (y/n). Like I’ve never loved before.”

A tingling feeling sparks throughout your body as you hear him tell you that. You wanted to give in so bad but you knew you shouldn’t.

“S-Shalnark, let’s stop for now.” You say, finally managing to get off his lap. Taking a deep sigh to calm yourself down, you begin to fix your clothes up. After finishing making yourself look presentable, and to hide the hickeys he had made, you look back over to Shalnark who is giving you a sad look.

Letting out a small sigh, you lean over and give him a small loving kiss. Pulling away, slightly panting, you rest your forehead against his. “Just because I stopped doesn’t mean I don’t like you idiot. It’s just you’re in a very drugged up state. I want to do this when you are sober and willing.”

Shalnark lets out a small sigh but nods his head, “o-okay.”

“Here. I’ll grab you some sleeping pills so you can hopefully sleep it off. I’ll also give you something to lower your temperature.” You explain, grabbing some different pills and a new cup of water. Handing it to him, he takes it while you sit down on the edge of the bed.

Suddenly, as soon as he is finished taking the pills, he leans in to give you a small kiss on the lips.

“I love you” Shalnark says, slightly slurring his words. He flashes you his cheeky smile before giving you another small kiss and laying down.

You smile down on him as well as you respond back, “I love you too.”

You pet your fingers through his hair until he slowly lulls himself off to sleep. Once you see he is passed out, you check your phone to see if there are any updates from Paul. Seeing that you had missed one call, you carefully get up from the bed to call him back.

“Hey Paul? Yeah, everything is fine here. How was—“

—.—.—.—.—

“WHERE’S THAT BITCH?!” Mal flinches at the yelling, almost dropping her morning coffee. “Miss Clara please do not yell in my department especially in the morning while others are sleeping.”

“I’m sorry Mal but I just can’t believe that bitch Moxxi tried to—“

“I’ve already been made aware of the details. Moxxi has already been taken into police custody and (y/n) and Shalnark are perfectly fine.”

“Are you sure? Where is (y/n) I need to talk to her—“

“Lara calm down.” Lara spins around to the voice to see her best friend, Clara, behind her. Surprised to see her friend already here, Lara grabs her by the shoulders and moves her away from most people to privately talk to her. “Clara, did you hear what happened?”

“Of course I did.”

“Then, why are you so calm? Mate, Moxxi drugged Shal with an sex drug! And (y/n) was left alone with him. Like, holy shit! They probably slept together. Our ship possibly has sailed and, Hell, (Y/n) might be having a baby on the way! Like—“

Clara shushes Lara to calm her down. “Lara. Calm down. They didn’t have sex and (y/n) isn’t pregnant.”

“Well, something must have happened?!”

“Well, Yeah, there were romantic things.“

“See. Then— (Y/n)!” Lara cuts herself off once she sees (Y/n) round the corner. Lara is about to run to her friend when she sees (Y/n) practically collapse into her office chair and place her head down on the counter. Confused, Lara slowly inches her way to her friend.

“(Y/n)? Are you—“ “Please someone get me a cup of water.” You mumble to no one in particular. Picking the cup up, Clara hands it to you. Lara watches in wide eyes as you pour the whole thing over your head.

“(Y/n)?” “How could I forget something like that!” You shout looking up at the three. Finally now that your head is lifted up, Lara can see your face is a burning bright red.

Confused, Lara turns to Clara while you whine Mal’s ear off.

“Okay, what the fuck happened?”

Clara sighs as she shakes her head, “Aphrodisiac drugs cause increased sexual desire, sexual pleasure, or sexual behavior. However, most Side effects include Dizziness, Nausea, and…

…Memory loss of all to most events while under the influence.”

Bonus:

Shalnark looks at the door, very confused about why you had suddenly got up and left. Was it something he said? No, that can’t be it. All he had asked was when you had gotten back and what happened last night. He wondered what had happened.

Could it be?

A blush finds its way on the blonde man’s face. He hoped he hadn’t said anything weird while sleeping last night. Especially with that dream he had.

After all, that dream almost felt too real. He actually thinks he can almost taste your cherry flavored lip balm on his lips.

But, that can’t be correct. It was only a dream… right?

People who have been waiting: @meromelodi , @quartetstarheaven , @yumezai , @lvndrhwis , @writtenappreciation , @jojo-sinner

[deja-vux]

Dad!Ateez:Holding Their Little One for the First Time

A/N:I didn’t think I'd be able to write this one as there are only so many ways to write this topic but somehow we made it work. Gonna be tagging the moots on this one because if I'm gonna give myself baby fever you're all coming down with me. other than that enjoy :) Warnings:mentions of preemie/nicu baby, mentions of pregnancy complications,suggestions of miscarriage, depictions of surrogate pregnancy, covid birth, mentions of delivery absence, mentions of first-time parent fears

Kim Hongjoong

       None of you had been able to properly hold your baby girl since she was born 2 months earlier than expected. The only embrace she had ever felt was that of the nurse’s arms and the incubator she resided in until now. During one of your visits to see her you were surprised with the news that she could finally come home. You were beyond ecstatic and you knew Hongjoong would be too. Knowing he was currently working on Ateez’s newest album in his studio you decided to pay him a surprise visit. You snuck through the hallways of KQ making sure none of the other guys could see you two before Hongjoong. Quietly you opened the door, sneaking into the studio as he was listening to a demo on his headphones. You gently set the carrier holding your sleeping daughter onto one of the extra chairs before covering his eyes. Hongjoong jumped slightly at the sudden intrusion before relaxing instantly as he heard your giggles as he took his headphones off. “Gee I wonder who it could be,” he teased before reaching back to poke your sides causing you to squirm.

“Ya,” you squealed, causing a certain someone to stir, catching Hongjoongs attention.

“Who’s that?’ Hongjoong asked, curiosity sparking his attention.

“A little someone you’ve been dying to meet,” Y/N replied, turning Hongjoong’s chair to face his daughter.

“Soojinnie” he gasped as he saw her stretch.

      Y/N watched as he sniffled, wiping his tears with his sleeves. She smiled softly as he watched him gently rock her carrier, quelling her soft whines before opening her eyes and taking in her new surroundings. Hongjoong couldn’t help but watch in awe and neither could Y/N both their hearts feeling warm and full. “Wanna hold her?’ Y/N asked. Hongjoong straightened in his chair smiling as he nodded softly taking a deep breath. He attempted to take her out of the carrier struggling due to his nerves making his hands shaky. With the help of Y/N he was able to take her out and hold her close to his chest causing a tear to fall as the pain and yearning he had been feeling and pushing away finally came out. Almost as if in response to comfort him baby Soojin held onto his finger squeezing onto it causing him to chuckle softly. “I know princess, I know. I’m glad you're home too, Soo,” he smiled, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

Park Seonghwa

      Seonghwa had rushed from dance practice the moment he caught wind that your water had broken and despite having one of the busiest schedules he’s had throughout his whole career he still managed to have all the energy in the world as excitement and adrenaline fueled him. The moment he heard your son’s first wails though everything seemed to change. His excitement was traded for pure adoration as he watched your son cling to you as the nurses cut the umbilical cord. Without a second thought, Seonghwa placed a gentle hand on your son’s back right next to yours which held his head. Despite his gloves in the way, the boy seemed to silence his wails slowly but surely as he realized now both of his parents were near. Seonghwa watched with a pout on his face as he watched the nurses take him to get him cleaned up. Although he knew they were only doing their job Seonghwa couldn’t help but feel a pang in his chest as he heard his son whine at the feeling of his first bath. All he wanted to do was hold his son and shield him from any dangers the world might bring. Eventually, their son was brought back and they were offered their son.  Seonghwa watched in awe as Y/N fed and nursed little Minseok. Everything seemed to be perfect until he started to whine. He had already been fed, burped, and had a fresh diaper, this led the couple to be puzzled by what the newborn could want. “Hey what’s wrong Minnie?” Seonghwa cooed, causing the boy to lean towards him.  It wasn’t until Seonghwa spoke up that they realized what the small boy had been missing, his father. It was like a lightbulb lit up over his head. “You want appa to hold you?” he asked, causing the infant to reply with a small whine.

“I think he does,” Y/N giggled.

“Come to appa, little one,” he groaned softly as he took the little one from his wife’s arms.

      He gently rocked the little one until all but his quiet snores could be heard. Y/N watched as tears threatened to spill from Seonghwa’s eyes and she couldn’t help but feel her heart grow three times in size. “Are you crying Hwa?” she teased as she heard his sniffles.

“No,” he said sternly before chuckling softly as he choked on the lump forming in his throat, “Okay maybe,” he sighed happily as he gave his signature smile.

Jeong Yunho

      The day was finally here, the day your and Yunho’s miracle baby would be born. Despite him being upset about missing most of your pregnancy due to touring Yunho was glad that you waited until he was back for you to tell him as he didn’t know how he would have survived the whole nine months waiting for your little princess to be born. In fact, he had even rushed from Incheon Airport to Seoul in order to be by your side as you gave birth. You were surprised to be giving birth a week earlier than expected but the two of you remained calm nevertheless praying for a positive outcome. Luckily everything went by with flying colors and no complications whatsoever. It wasn’t long until you had your daughter in your arms. Of course, tears were shed on both sides. For the most part, Yunho let her stick to you as you were instructed by the nurses on the billions of things that had to be accomplished in order to care for a newborn. It wasn’t until both you and your daughter were resting that he’d get a chance. Despite the severe jet lag noted by the bags forming under his eyes, Yunho was up on wide alert like a guard dog keeping an eye on both of you. Soon enough your daughter Hyoyeon began to stir, signaling something was wrong. Not wanting to wake you Yunho quietly got up to assess the problem concluding it was time for a diaper change. He swiftly changed her diaper, tossing the old one as he finished.

      He sighed happily as she had kept a grip on his finger as he tried to go back to his seat. In a change of heart, he gently picked up the little one from her basket before making his way to his bed while they were staying here. As soon as his back hit the small mattress he settled his daughter on his chest feeling her tiny heartbeat against his own and suddenly he felt whole. He kept her close as he softly sang, “Looking for star. Looking for love, 어떤 슬픔도 올 수 없게 언제까지나 그댈 지켜줄 거예요 Forever you are my star.” Before he knew it both he and his daughter shared a yawn. Yunho couldn’t tell if it was the jet lag catching up to him or the sound of her small snores that was making him sleepy, maybe it was a combination of both. Either way, it wasn’t long till the two succumbed to their slumber. Yunho was awoken by her stirring and he quickly awoke to calm her. Much to his surprise, his wife was also awake filming the pair's interaction. “I can already tell she’s gonna love you Yuyu,” Y/N said as she set her phone down.

“I just hope it as much as I love the both of you,” he smiled before setting your now sleeping daughter gently back in her basket, “Our little star,” he cooed brushing some hair out of her face.

Kang Yeosang

      From the moment you told him you were pregnant, Yeosang wanted to film everything. For the most part, he was able to have his wish granted. The only thing he missed was your pregnancy as due to complications early on determined that your body wouldn't be able to fulfill a full and healthy pregnancy without compromising you or the baby. Luckily you were able to switch to surrogate pregnancy with no complications thanks to the help of your sister. The only problem was due to the current state of the world neither you nor Yeosang would be able to see or hold her until the day after her birth. Once you got the okay though you both wasted little to no time to arrive and see your baby girl. The two of you arrived breathless from rushing to only be instantly enamored the moment you saw her in your sister’s arms. You gasped softly holding a hand over your mask as your sister couldn’t help but giggle at your reaction as she had reacted the same when she had her own child. She urged you to come closer, gently handing her over as you did. Yeosang couldn’t help but watch you in awe as you were able to instantly calm the hyper newborn. A little coo could be heard slipping from your daughter’s lips as she took in the two new figures above her who were her parents. Y/N sat on the visitor’s couch smiling warmly before looking up at Yeosang who sat next to her. “She’s perfect Yeo,” you sniffled as Yeo smiled.

“Our little Eun-Byeol,” he replied.

“As much as I wanna hog her and keep her to myself, do you wanna hold her?” you asked.

“I’d like that,” he smiled.

      Both you and your sister helped in instructing Yeosang on how to hold the little one. As soon as your daughter settled in his arms Yeosang could only feel his heart swell along with his eyes with tears of happiness. The crack in the dam was caused by her gummy grin caused by him introducing himself to her and that cued in the waterworks. He sniffled as his tears fell onto his mask as he smiled giving small chuckles. Catching him off guard he was surprised to see his brother-in-law filming the both of you causing him to look up as he attempted to hold back his tears. “How are you feeling Yeo?” your sister asked him.

“Beyond happy, I just wish I could take her home,” he said looking at his daughter’s eyes which resembled yours.

“We will soon don’t worry,” Y/N smiled warmly as she rubbed his arm in an attempt to comfort him.

Choi San

      Unfortunately due to poor weather and scheduling, San wouldn't be able to be there for the birth of your daughter but that didn’t deter his excitement to her any less. When he heard you were finally coming back home with your daughter Yuri in tow he couldn’t help but jump with joy and excitement despite their current jumping ban. All throughout rehearsals, you two were all he could think about keeping him distracted. Eventually after realizing there was no way of calming him until you got here they decided to call a break. San quickly ran to his phone to call you but when the call went straight to voicemail he began to panic. Just as he was about to grab his things to leave, a soft knock was heard on the door of the practice room catching all the boys' attention. Hongjoong stood to open the door revealing it to be you holding a baby car seat and diaper bag. San immediately jumped up and ran towards you Hongjoong taking your bag and the car seat before San could make any impact which threw you slightly back to the point where you think you would have fallen were it not for San holding onto you with the strength of Hercules. He kissed you passionately before resting his forehead against yours to catch his breath causing you to blush. You cleared your thoughts as you remembered the reason for coming in the first place. “As much as I’m enjoying this reunion love, there's someone you should meet,” Y/N said before reaching down to grab your daughter from her seat, “Meet Yuri.”

      San gasped in awe as he gently took the infant into his arms watching her eyes open after rubbing them gently with her mitten-covered hands. The curious gazes of the boys surrounded the trio during their interaction as San introduced himself. He watched in awe as she cooed with curiosity watching her father who she had only heard through the phone up until now. The baby then turned to face her mother in confusion causing San to pout slightly at the lack of her attention. In an attempt to win her over he began to sing the nursery rhyme that he would sing to her ever since she was in her mother’s stomach. Almost instantly recognizing the little tune the little girl turned back towards her father giving him a small smile as she squealed in enjoyment. San had to stop himself from freezing with excitement at her reaction. Instead, he quickly turned towards his members with a cheeky grin on his face. “You guys heard that right?! That means I’m her favorite,” he stated excitedly causing the other members and you to chuckle relieved that he was able to adapt so quickly.

Song Mingi

      Mingi had almost forgotten what he was panicking for as he ran back and forth from your room to the car until he saw you holding onto a dining room chair as your next contraction hit. Just as expected but also unexpected the twins were arriving before the nine months were up. As soon as the waves of pain passed Mingi helped you into the car rushing you both to the hospital. Before you knew it both your little ones had arrived. Excited to meet your newborns he didn’t question the nurse’s instructions to remove his shirt in order to hold his twins. Not only were you both meeting them for the first time but you were also finding out the genders as well as you had decided to keep it a surprise. Much to both of your surprise you had given birth to a healthy baby boy named Daewon followed five minutes later by a healthy baby girl named Chaewon. You were handed your girl while he was handed your boy. All noise seemed to diminish as soon as both babies made contact with their designated parents. Mingi watched in awe as he watched his son nuzzle into his shoulder. Eventually, it was time to switch twins and Mingi watched as the nurse handed him his little girl. Before the nurse could take his boy over to his mother though he stopped her. “Wait just let me have this moment,” he pleaded, “I feel like a super dad right now,” he claimed, causing Y/N and the midwife to giggle at his antics.

“And that you are love, that you are,” you smiled warmly admiring your biggest blessing holding your two newest blessings.

“You should try it too babe,” he said, letting the nurse bring your son over as adjusted your daughter on his shoulder.

      He carefully supported your daughter as she moved to position herself to her liking most likely mimicking her position in the womb as she had tucked her legs between his chest and hers. Mingi looked down to see his little girl smiling and his heart instantly melted as he sniffled tears threatening to spill. “Are you crying?” Y/N teased as they had made a bet on who would be the first to cry.

“No I’m fine,” he retorted as he turned to you, putting on the tough guy act.

“You know it’s okay right babe?” you asked.

“Yes,” he sniffled, “But I'm also not losing $50 to you either. Nice try though,” he chuckled as he felt a lump form in his throat.

      He gently brushed some hair out of your daughter’s face as she cooed softly, reacting to his touch, “It’s official I’m never gonna get over this.”

Jung Wooyoung

      Wooyoung had been waiting patiently to hold your son but knew it would be a while before he could due to your c-section. Despite him being awake and by your side the entire time during your labor, he was still somehow wide awake as you slept with just the thought of holding your son fueling him. It wouldn't be until a couple of hours later when his head began to bob slightly as slumber began to take over that he saw them wheel Youngjae in. Despite his previous sleepy state he immediately jumped up at the sight of his son. As the nurse noticed your sleeping state she offered the first diaper change to Wooyoung which he gladly accepted. He followed the nurse’s instructions as gently and carefully as he could, not wanting to hurt him in the process. As soon as he finished he asked the nurse if it was okay to hold his son. When the nurse nodded he felt his heart begin to race. He let the nurse guide his hands and arms as she placed the little bundle of joy into his arms. Once fully in his arms, Wooyoung felt his tense shoulders drop softly. His usual high and antic energy was replaced by adoring tranquility that would make his hyungs poke fun at him as they speculated if it was really him or not. Just like any parent, the first moment he held his child was the one he fell in love with. No matter how many times he tried to wrap his mind around it he couldn’t put together the words to describe the amount of joy and fulfillment he currently felt.

      He gently rocked your son as he paced around the hospital room, occasionally stopping by the window to let both him and Youngjae look at the stars and moon that seemed to shine just a little more tonight. At this moment there was nothing else except for the three of you together in your little bubble. He was so entranced that he hadn’t noticed that you woke up. As you sat up you were relieved to find your baby’s basket in the room but even more so when you saw him in Wooyoung's arms as he leaned against the wall singing little nursery rhymes. You kept quiet until you heard him say, “Da-da. I’m your dada, da-da.” The action causes you to giggle, catching his attention.

“What?” he asked, confused.

“You know he can’t speak yet right Woo?” you teased an eyebrow raised.

“I know that,” he playfully scoffed, “But it’s never too early to start training them to say it first,” he revealed proudly.

“We’ll see about that,” you giggled.

Choi Jongho

      Although Jongho was excited about meeting his son he was also extremely terrified as much as he hated to admit it. In fact, just the fear of caring for a whole nother human being was beginning to eat him up inside. He began to let others comment about him being “too young” and “too inexperienced” to be a father get to him. So much so that when Mingi told him you were going into an emergency delivery after going into labor at work he panicked and froze in place. Noting the maknae’s recent anxiety and nervousness Mingi helped Jongho to the hospital making it just in time to be by your side for the birth of your child and Mingi stayed for emotional support more so for Jongho than you as you seemed to be in a much calmer state probably thanks to the epidural you had. When it came to holding your son though Jongho seemed to freeze again in fear and before you knew it he had disappeared claiming he needed some air. Mingi reassured you everything would be fine before heading out to look for him. Eventually, he found him sitting in the hospital garden sitting on a bench with his head in his hands. Mingi’s brows furrowed with concern as he carefully approached Jongho not wanting to startle him. “You know your son is just as excited to meet you as you were to meet him,” Mingi says quietly as he sits next to Jongho,  “He’s waiting for you with your girlfriend in their room upstairs.”

“They don’t deserve me, I ran out,” Jongho sniffled.

“You were scared and that’s okay, all first-time parents are,” Mingi replied, rubbing circles on his back.

“But what if I mess up, what if I hurt him, what if I’m not there enough, what if I’m not enough for Y/N, what if- w-what if I fail,” he ranted, whispering his last words as he looked at Mingi with a tear-stained face.

“That’s exactly what an amazing dad would say,” Mingi said with a reassuring smile, chuckling as a confused expression spread across Jongho’s face, “Everything you just said is what anyone that wants to be a good parent worries about. If you mess up, so what? You’ll learn just like any first-time parent. I’m not gonna lie, some days will be harder than others and others will feel like pure bliss. Heck, some days will be in between the two because being a parent is never just one thing. You're a teacher, a doctor, a caregiver, a student, a superhero, and more all rolled into one. The spontaneity of it all is what makes it beautiful and worth it..”

      Mingi watched as Jongho wiped his tears, beginning to calm himself nodding softly. “Now what are you waiting for? Let's go meet your son,” Mingi encouraged. Jongho nodded, laughing softly at his hyung’s excitement. As they stood up to make their way back Jongho hugged him tightly muttering a thank you. Once back Mingi gently took the infant from your arms before guiding Jongho on how to hold him. You felt your worries disappear the moment you heard Jongho hold back tears of joy as he introduced himself to your son. “You know he still needs a name,” you smiled hoping it'd help him feel better. Jongho turned to face you with eyes of wonder before looking back down at the bundle of joy in his arms. “How about Minho?” he suggested with a bright smile as he looked up at you.

“Bright, I like that,” you smiled.

“Little Minho,” he sighed happily, pulling his son a little closer.

Taglist:@yeosangmystar @seojonneh​ @perfectlysane24​

Moots:@a-soft-hornytiny @bangchu-choi @bonbonhwa @galaxteez @little-precious-baby @multidreams-and-desires @seo--changbin @serialee @spinster-sisters @woowommy @wooyoungsbae @yungisstar1117 @yunhofingers @yunhomocide 

[peakyxtommy]

Last First Birthdays

Summary: Tommy & you celebrating your last child’s first birthday. You’re sad that the kids are growing up. Tommy provides a listening ear. 

Warnings: All Pure Fluff, slight mention of birth/pre-term labor. 

A/N: I am not a doctor, but did do some research. Enjoy, I loved writing this. Soft Tommy & Tommy with kids is my forever weakness. 

Word Count: 2.4K 

Today was a special day. Your last born was having his first birthday today. Attius James Shelby.

“Look at the birthday boy.” You coo, your fingers patting your son’s stomach as he releases a small squeal, happy to see your face. He had just awoken from his pre-party nap.

You dressed him in his 1st birthday onesie, khaki shorts, and clipped his pacifier to his top, which would come in handy later. His little blue orbs stare into your eyes, as you stand him up on his changing table, before lifting him into your arms.

“Let’s go find your dad and siblings.” You peck his forehead, brushing your hand over his brown curly locks. You walk down the stairs, to see the hustle and bustle of the last minute platters of food and drinks being placed. 

You walk into the living room to see Henry, your eldest son reading a book on the couch. Lydia, your second child with cards in her hands, slapping one down against the carpet. While Tom sits on the floor with Maeve, your third child, assisting her while laughing at something she says.

“Who’s ready for the birthday boy?” You speak gaining their attention.

“Me! I can’t wait for cake.” Lydia screams with excitement causing Maeve to scrunch her face up in annoyance at her sister.

“I am going to play with Jonas. He’s bringing his new card game over.” Henry responds, closing his book.

“Mummy we sing for Atty, right.” Maeve asks, calling her brother by his nickname, not able to pronounce his full name.

“Yes we will sing and have one slice of cake each. I will be watching.” You wag your finger playfully at Lydia. All the while your husband sits with a smirk on his face, his eyes fully enticed with yours. The doorbell rings, causing the kids to scramble to greet their family and poor Tom left with cleaning up the card game, but it wasn’t new to him with a house with four kids.

“Looks like you need some help Mr. Shelby. Bones of yours are getting old.” You tease, earning an eye roll, as he leans himself gently into you, as your free hand helps him off the floor.  

“Keep it up while it lasts, you are right behind me.” He chuckles pulling you into his side. “You look lovely, dress suits you well. Always a beaut.”

“Why thank you, my love.” Your lips press against his cheek.

“Let’s go birthday lad, we have to spend time with our crazy family.” You laugh as he takes your son from your arms, fingers entwined with yours as you make your way to the backyard. - The party was a smash. It was an overall great day with your’s and Tommy’s family and a few close friends. You hoped Tom was able to get Lydia to bed because she had a sweet tooth almost as bad as you, knowing someone gave that girl a second piece of cake (John), which was more unnecessary sugar the girl needed in her system, hoping she wouldn’t have a stomach ache from all the treats today.

Atticus enjoyed being passed around, trying cake for the first time, and being more interested in the wrapping paper than the presents. You took enough photos to last a lifetime.  

As you rock your son asleep in his rocker you mind couldn’t help but think back to what a year it had really been since he was brought into the world, a miracle really. You couldn’t take your eyes off the photos you would switch out periodically (as you took new ones) around his bedroom. Keeping the same ones you took of him when he was just born, when he arrived home, family photos throughout the year. The images floating in your head. The memories forever imprinted in your mind.

He was born eight weeks early in September.This pregnancy came as a surprise as you and Tommy weren’t expecting to have any more as your hands were full with three kids already. You both weren’t getting any younger. 

When you told your husband the news, he took it in stride, telling you how excited he was, despite the chaos of his world around you. All your pregnancies so far were a breeze but this one was stressful. Tommy tried his best to be home, get extra help around the home with the children, and get your older two children to be more helpful when possible.

Your water broke 8 weeks early and you had to have an emergency c-section. Tom was by your side through it all panicking on the inside but putting a brave front on for you. He wheeled you to the NICU to see your small infant son with tubes hooked up to him. Learning how to connect with him through the two small holes of the incubator. That was the start of a journey, for the family.

It definitely put a strain on your marriage of having Tommy balance work, the kids, and taking time visiting the hospital and helping you recover. Both your families provided as much support as possible. The car ride home was nerve wracking having to remember all this information and doing this without the help of the nurses.

Atticus settled in pretty quick to the environment and his siblings who would come to say goodnight to their little brother. It would be hard to sleep during the night with either one of always getting up to check on him, even if he was just sleeping peacefully. He was a little behind his milestones which was to be expected but each step of the way was worth it. He was growing healthily, was able to say little phrases, and was getting closer to walking. He was the calmest out of all your children and easy going.

Your heart was happy to celebrate his first birthday. All your children’s birthdays made you emotional, as you knew they weren’t going to stay young - little - forever. As much as you both wanted them to. This one was the last first birthday you were going to celebrate, as you weren’t planning on having anymore children. Atticus like the rest of your kids were going to grow on their way to independence and need you less and less. You knew you had to let them find their way in this beautiful but cruel world.

“Knew I'd find you in here.” His voice brings comfort to your heart as he whispers to you in the dim lighting across the room, opening the door, just leaving it cracked a bit.

“The rest of the crew are finally to bed and remind me to slap John on the back of his head the next time I spot him for giving Lydia a second piece of cake.” His head shakes with a roll of the eyes as he paces across the floor, to take half a seat on the arm of the rocking chair. You can’t help the smile that plays on your lips.

“Those two are as thick as thieves, poor lad can never say no to her. Spoils her rotten, like the rest of your siblings do to all our kids.” You reply knowing all the Shelby siblings loved all your children equally, each one having similarities to them all, but knew which children brought a weakness or were closer to their uncles/aunt.

It’s quiet for a moment, just the two of you, staring at your sleeping son in your arms. “You know he’s not going anywhere, none of them are. They’re always going to need you, need us. Hell, even I'll need you when I'm old and grey.” His lips peck the top of your head, fingers squeezing your shoulder with gentle reassurance.

He knew you like the back of his hand. His words rang true in your mind and heart, knowing this wasn’t the first time he found you in this spot, with the same thoughts, that come along with parenthood.

You wanted old and grey with Tom, you wanted to believe in it, even though you both knew it wasn’t promised not in his world especially. You were blessed with him thus far, this man aged like fine wine the older he got. You could tell he was getting older in trying to keep up with the energy of the kids, the glasses you adored, and the crow’s feet that was starting to make an appearance.

“I know, just working myself up over the small things. I know we don’t have to worry but I do. Just want to make sure everything will go right. Henry is going to be a teen soon, that boy is too smart for his own good. Lydia is just as stubborn as you are and free-spirited but reminds me of you. Maeve is sweet and our little helper, she’s only just started preschool. Both of them wrapped around your finger in different ways.

I accepted it then in my mind after Maeve but then Atticus came along. I think about the what if’s of that day, the weeks passed, but then I'm reminded of today. How it all feels right and complete. It all goes by so fast, I just want to hold on to this moment, ya know.”

He listens to your continuous thought, walking through it as you speak your mind. You were a deep thinker and took everything to heart because you cared so much. It was the little things that added up. That made life sweeter than the grand things. That was one of the things he loved the most about you, the thing that attracted him from the very beginning of your relationship. He doesn’t miss the quiet tears that release gently out your eyes, the smallness of your wet voice.

He knows what you mean because he has the same thoughts, even though he doesn’t always share them. He has enough nerves for his lifetime and lines in his forehead to prove it.

Henry the eldest reminded him of the earlier years of your relationship. Young, in love, just starting out. The excitement of your first born. He knew after Henry was born, he would do everything in his power to stay alive. He was smart, a leader, and enjoyed spending time with his cousins. He was a younger version of himself, but better. He was glad for it.

Lydia came a few years later and she took his heart when his blue eyes met her brown ones. She was a handful from the start (she was definitely his daughter). She reminded him of Ada in her sass and the mouth on her but also John as she was the child that brought the most laughter and entertainment to the family as she was extroverted. They would enjoy being silly together and tease you to no end.

Maeve was like you in all ways, sweet, loving, and ready to help the best way a 4 year old can. She was a shy girl but was definitely a daddy’s girl. Always searching for him when he was away or would try to sweet talk her way to stay up to see him before bed or read her an extra story. Would make herself comfortable in his home office to play with her toys or find a way to sit on his lap as he did paperwork. She would always ask him the sweetest of things or most serious things, trusting whatever answer left his mouth. He had the hardest time telling her no.

Atticus came as a surprise but in the best of ways. His birth changed something within him. Thomas Shelby wasn’t a religious man by any means, but when he watched his son get wheeled away by the nurses and was watching him through the big glass window the first few hours of his life, he prayed hard for the first time, in a long time, since he was 18. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing a child, let alone losing you.

He remembers your tears as he wheeled you to meet your son for the first time. Him reassuring you and himself, that it was all going to be okay. It was this child that made him slow down the most and rethink his priorities, putting them in check once again. These past two years were hard business and family wise. Managing the logistics of expanding and meetings, risky deals/death threats, raising 4 kids, with two under the age of 5 and in need of constant attention.

Handling the nerves of it all, your/his moods, and the tiffs you both would get in due to sleep deprivation, late nights working, stubbornness on both ends, or just not having a minute alone together or for intimacy. Moments like these, in the quiet night of his home with you and the children at peace made it worth every minute of the day. Made him want to be around even longer, even though it wasn’t necessarily promised.  

“I do too love, I know.” His fingers brush the sleeping infant’s cheeks, watching as he snuggles subconsciously closer in your arms. He knew he didn’t have to say much because in that small phrase communicated all you needed to know, to hear. The both you could read one another like a book where it speaks for itself.

“Come let’s get to bed.” He hums, blue eyes shimmering with affection, as his lips turn upward in one of your favorite smiles, reserved just for you. His soft lips press against yours lightly into just a small peck. The pads of his soft fingers, brushing against your wet cheeks to collect this remainder of the tears. He stands to his feet, holding the chair still as you get up to place your son into his crib.

“Goodnight, sweet Atticus. We love you.” You whisper, feeling the warmth of Tommy wrap around your frame, chin resting on your shoulder, fingers tangling together, bands touching as you both stare down at your sleeping son.

You knew that everything was going to be okay. Even though you weren’t going to be celebrating anymore first birthdays in your household, you knew every birthday after would still be as special as the last one. You always made sure of it as you loved celebrating birthdays as much as holidays. You had all you needed within yourself, the man you loved dearly, and the four sleeping children you called your own.