#sudden realisations is when everything has built up to this point of familiarity and bond with eachother that its only natural to say it

[samsrosary]

i like it when character realises “i love you” and then immediately says it out loud without hesitation because theyre so close to the other. Thats great

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Solnit on the revelations of crisis

Historian Rebecca Solnit is the best writer on disasters and societal response, the genius who gave us "A Paradise Built in Hell." Her latest Guardian column,could not be more cogent or timely.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/apr/07/what-coronavirus-can-teach-us-about-hope-rebecca-solnit

The crisis made the impossible possible: extending workers' rights, freeing prisoners, finding trillions for relief.

Crisis (med): "Crossroads of recovery and death"

Emergency: From "emerge" - from the familiar into a new posture

Catastrophe: Root is "sudden overturning."

The lessons of disaster: everything is connected, weakness is revealed (and so is strength). It's a spring thaw for power, when the ice that seemed utterly solid shatters and we slip through.

Who benefits from the shattering? Often those whose priority is reestablishing order, rather than helping those in crisis. They seize and consolidate power, suspend rights, use insider knowledge to enrich themselves.

They prioritize property over people, which is where "elite panic" springs from: characterizing the things ordinary people need to do merely to survive as "looting" or "squatting" - hence shoot-to-kill orders after Hurricane Katrina.

Billionaires are ordering their workers to stay on the job. Hobby Lobby's religious maniac owners told workers God would protect them. The Uihleins, Trump insiders, gagged workers who had symptoms to avoid "unnecessary panic."

Paychex founder Tom Golisano said "The damages of keeping the economy closed as it is could be worse than losing a few more people." (He says people "misinterpreted" his statement.)

This is the pandemic-accelerated version of historic practices, like working children to death or operating unsafe mines or sweatshops, burning oil and cooking the world -- prizing "the lifeless thing that is profit over living beings."

Doing them fast makes them impossible to ignore, but they're not really any different Hobby Lobby's owner forcing workers to risk their lives to sell crafting supplies.

Pandemic's revealed interconnectedness is incompatible with capitalist doctrines of individualism. This interconnectedness is a longstanding scientific consensus. That's why the right is so hostile to science: reality has a leftist bias.

The right's rejection of coronavirus science - insisting on keeping businesses and churches open - isn't an aberration, it's just a vivid example of the longstanding denialism over everything from abortion to the climate crisis. The pandemic makes slow things fast.

The pandemic crisis reveals our true natures. Everyday people engage in selfless acts of charity and generosity and mutual aid. Rich people cower in bunkers and insist that we all need to get back behind the wheels of our Ubers.

Solnit holds out hope that when this ends, we'll learn from it: "I wonder if we will rethink how we were linked, how we moved about and how the goods we rely on moved about."

"The wave of privatisation that has characterised our neoliberal age began with the privatisation of the human heart, the withdrawal from a sense of a shared fate and social bonds."

The 1972 quake in Managua brought about a revolution: "Once you realised that your life can be decided by one night of the Earth deciding to shake, [you thought]: ‘So what? I want to live a good life and I want to risk my life, because I can also lose my life in one night.’"

Pandemic upends impossibility: "Ireland nationalised its hospitals. Canada came up with four months of basic income for those who lost their jobs. Germany did more than that. Portugal decided to treat immigrants and asylum seekers as full citizens during the pandemic."

The 2008 crisis gave us Occupy, and that gave us new discourses about inequality, student debt, Medicare for All. We go into this crisis with all that in hand.

Patrisse Cullors's Black Lives Matter mission statement: "Provide hope and inspiration for collective action to build collective power to achieve collective transformation. Rooted in grief and rage but pointed towards vision and dreams."

There's no going back: "Ordinary life before the pandemic was already a catastrophe of desperation and exclusion for too many human beings, an environmental and climate catastrophe, an obscenity of inequality."

[star-munchies]

Day 1: ThorQuill Week / Dance

Post-Infinity War: Finally after Thanos was defeated, all those who disappeared into dust peacefully returned to the real world and reunited with their loved ones happily.. apart from an unfortunate few that were not able to be brought back. However, Quill is still stuck in his own guilt and blames himself for killing half of the universe. Nobody but Thor is there to try cheer him up, even if he has trouble getting close to the other.

Author Note: This prompt went from angsty, cheery, to plain crack in a minimum of a few minutes. Dear god what have I done. It fits more in the ‘Comfort’ prompt but, I like it like this.

—————————————-

‘If you ever change your mind’

Quill’s thumb ghostly brushed across the smooth surface of the Zune softly in a slow pattern, treating it with such delicacy as if it were a rich fragile item that was rare to get a hold of. A soothing tune rung out from the mini pair of earphones that were connected by the music device by a cable. The man had his eye’s cast to the floor, a mixture of tenderness and sorrow painted in his forest-green orbs. A bashful of memories flooding in his head as the song wistfully continued to play in his ears.

‘About leavin’, leavin’ me behind’

He could only remember so much. The complexity of her beautifully toned skin, her eyes that held a powerful ferocity yet kind-hearted as well. That sharp gaze of hers that never failed to have him fall to his knees like a deer in headlights. My god, she was so smart and strong. Unlike he, stupid and weak compared to her god-like figure. She was one of the only beings in the entire galaxy that was able to pull him back up onto his feet, support him no matter the circumstances, had a shoulder for him to lean on when it was one of those days where he just needed to sit down and have a breakdown. Gamora was always there for him, but now she wasn’t. She was gone and it was all his fault.

‘Baby, bring it to me. Bring your sweet lovin’”

How could he be so stupid? They should have never gone to Knowhere in the first place, and none of this would have happened. They should’ve just gone with Rocket and Groot. It was naive of them to think they could go up against Thanos who had the power of two infinity stones in his hands. She should have just gone right. Why didn’t she go fucking right?

Was he even worth to be called their Captain anymore? He got who he thought to be his soulmate, his lover, killed by that purple nut-sack of chin asshole. Then he had the rest of the universe dissolve into a land of nothing, leaving their close ones to grieve. It was all his fault.

‘Bring it on home to me’

Warm tears brimmed from the corners of his eyes, as he felt them slowly roll down his pink cheeks. The agonising pain in his heart burned up in his chest like a raging fire of emotions, as he let out a small sob that was welling up in his throat for so long. He felt pathetic.

Quill was so lost in thoughts that he didn’t notice the sound of the door to his bedroom creak open behind him, until a annoyingly familiar voice chimed in.

“Lord of stars.”

It was that low and husky voice that pulled him out of his web of thoughts, oh how he hated it. The authority and intimidation that made him feel threatened, smaller in comparison. After the whole universe-decaying issue was fixed, not everything had gone exactly back to normal. There were still many problems that were still trying to be resolved throughout the galaxy, and some people were torn apart. Thor had no one left, his brother along with the rest of his people were no longer there by his side. The few survivors that chose to abandon this journey to ‘Rebuild Asgard’ had went on their own paths, choosing a new civilisation to blend in with. The other Guardians suggested he come join them on the Milano and offered him a place on their team, with the ignorance of Quill’s protests and disdain to the idea. Sometimes he questioned if he was even a leader at the amount of uncountable times that his team made their own decisions without any of his regard.

Despite all that has happened to him though, the man still had a smile on his face throughout the trip. And that made him angry. How could this mere being who has lost so much in his life uphold his emotions like a marshmallow on a stick? Every time Quill caught him laughing with his friends on the ship, there was always a pureness in his eyes that bloomed of contentment. It made zero sense how someone could express such a face that has experienced, possibly decades, of misery and agony in life, even for a god. He didn’t like to think that he was ‘jealous’ of him for handling it so ‘easily’ per say, just very uneasy.

“What do you want..” Quill grumbled, loud enough for the Asgardian to hear across the room but still a bit hushed in a sense.

Thor’s reply was hesitant, but sounded genuinely concerned, “You’ve been in here for quite awhile... everyone has grown a bit worried of you, even the rabbit, so I came to check if you were alright.” He had his back faced to the man, so he had no clue of what kind of expression the God of Thunder held on his face. Nor did he want to.

“I’m fine... just get out...” His tone rose a little louder this time, refusing to let this buffoon see him in his weakest state, it would make him feel more humiliated than previously. He just wasn’t in the mood at all today.

“Quil-“

“I said get out!” He snapped. He knew it was unfair to lash out on Thor because of his own misgivings, but right now he could care less.

The air grew awfully silent after Quill’s sudden outburst, the only audible sound in the room was the faint music from the Zune in Quill’s. He could feel the strong gaze from Thor glare holes in his back, causing a strange insecure and self-conscious feeling to rapidly dwell in the pit of his stomach. It made him undergo an uncomfortable sense knowing that the powerful being behind him was watching him. All he wanted was to be alone, asleep and to never wake up again.

When Quill heard heavy footsteps steadily approach from behind him, his shoulders tensed knowing that he couldn’t run from this. “Peter”

Quill’s breath got caught in his throat, freezing in place. Only Gamora had ever called him by his first name, ‘Peter’. She was the only one who wasn’t from Earth that was given permission to speak his true name. It truly manifested how close their bond was. So the peculiar sensation that wildly burned in his chest when he heard his name roll off Thor’s tongue almost pushed him off the edge. Why did he feel so tranquil when he said it? A man he barely knew, one that made him envious, lit a serenity in his heart that eased it down.

Quill slid his face into his palms and let a shaky sigh escape his mouth. He was to tired for this, he couldn’t muster up enough energy to get mad anymore at this point, “I don’t know what to do..” He admitted, feeling his nostrils flare and the tears fall once again, “I- fuck, I loved her so much! She was so... G-Gamora was so perfect. She would feel so disappointed in me if she learnt I got everyone killed... I-I don’t deserve her.. I feel so helpless without her. And now she’s.. A-and now she’s gone forever..”

From the other side of the bed, he felt the mattress sink down a bit, indicating that Thor had seated himself opposite of Quill, facing away from each other. A thunderstorm brewed in Thor’s eyes, sensing the sorrow of the Guardian behind him, his usual happy expression switched to one of understanding and profoundness.

A few seconds of silence passed, which didn’t seem to bother him but gave him more time to think, before he opened his mouth to say what he wanted Quill to hear, “..When I had first joined your crew, I was hopeless and lost. Not knowing why I lived and everyone else I knew didn’t. I felt like a failure, failing to succeed to the expectations of my father in my youth, allowing my kingdom too fall, failing to save my brother and mother from death... My only way of coping was by bringing joy to others.” Quill shut his mouth and listened intently to what Thor was trying to convey “I have killed a great deal of men in my life-time, upon the thousands. I’ve done stupid and unchivalrous acts without knowing the consequences of my actions until it was to late. I could’ve become a war-ridden tyrant and a corrupted ruler like my sister, but I didn’t. My father saved me from that fate by casting me out to find redemption. That I did... Looking back on that memory made me realise that my purpose had not died out yet, and I still had something to live for. Even if Asgard has fallen, not everything can last forever. Knowing that at least some of my people still stand among the rest of universe is enough for me. Your friends, that I have grown to care deeply for are some people I want to protect... that includes you as well.”

Quill let the words sink in slowly, finding he had no response to Thor’s words of wisdom. It felt like he just got plummeted by a stack of bricks. He couldn’t understand why Thor would treat him with such kindness, whilst all he has done is disrespect the man because his own precious ego was hurt. He didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve any of this. But before he could respond to Thor, he felt a rough tug at his wrist and he was turned around and pulled off the bed, “Gah!” He squeaked in shock, struggling to keep a hold of his Zune without it falling out of his grasp, “Thor what are yo-“

Unexpectedly, an arm was wrapped around his waist as his body was brought closer to the other’s impressively built one. A large hand grabbed onto his, intertwining their fingers together. The hand that was safely holding onto his zune propped up on Thor’s shoulder, to keep him steady. Looking up at the taller man in shock, confusion evident in his tear-glistened eyes, all he got in return was a warm smile, “..I am not exactly aware of the many forms of dance from your homeland, so bare with me here..” He said sheepishly, as he glided the to across the room slowly, spinning the pair around gracefully. The motion was slow, but Quill could hear his heart ramming in his chest as he felt his body heat connect with Thor’s, the vulnerability he felt when settled safely in Thor’s strong arms. The enchanting blue shimmer in his eyes that reflected upon his own green ones sent a shiver down his spine.

Was this okay? Should he be allowed to feel this way? It felt similar to how he felt when he and Gamora danced, but Thor wasn’t Gamora. Shouldn’t he be hating this man? Pushing him away and screaming at him? He didn’t know what to think anymore..

“Quill,” Said captain snapped out of his thoughts and concentrated his attention back on the Asgardian, “I know we may not have the best relationship, but I hope to get to know you better. Not only as my captain but as a person. So if you need a shoulder to lean on... i’m always here. Do not blame yourself for what happened, it was all on Thanos.. You acted out of pure love and sadness. You are not evil, Quill.” Thor said, his smile softening a bit as he stared deep into Quill’s eyes, showing his genuine support and care.

The former outlaw’s eyes widened a bit for a second. Quill couldn’t help but sigh, which quickly evolved into a light fit of laughter, “Man, how did I get stuck with an idiot like you..” He huffed, grinning up at the blonde which rose a flare in Thor’s chest, tightening his “...Thank you..” Thor chuckled, as the two smiled at each other. His former thoughts suddenly being rested away for now, as he felt his mood no longer waver. The pressure of his guilt no longer on his shoulders, as if the frustrations and pain was lifted up off him. Maybe he could try to get to know Thor a little bit better. The guy wasn’t half bad.

“OH MY GOD, CAN YOU TWO GET A ROOM?!”

“SHUT UP TRASH PANDA, WE ARE IN A ROOM- Wait, what?! Its not like that!”

“ITS EXACTLY LIKE THAT!”