#submitted by jageshemashftw

[incorrectmlpships]

Tirek: We have your son!

Starlight: We don’t have a son?

Chrysalis: Then who’s this blue griffon with the crippling depression?

Trixie: OH CRAP!! THEY HAVE GALLUS!!

[incorrect-housepets-quotes]

Joey: I thought I saw my older brothers hugging each other. Then I got closer and realized they were actually choking each other and I’m like, okay, that makes way more sense.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Thursday, January 13

Buffy: Is there something you want to tell me? Riley: What? Oh, yes — I am a lesbian. Buffy: Well, it's good that you're so open about it.

~~Something Blue~~

The Sunnydale Herald is looking for a couple of new editors! Contributing to the Herald is a great way to get your Buffy on! Find out more here.

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Logos (Fred, Lorne, Connor, Angel, T) by MazalHaMidbar

Books and Brimstone (Giles/reader, G) by EddyWrites

Teacher (Vampire Willow/Buffy, G) by anonymous participant of Exchanges After Dark Birthday Bash 2022

His Darkest Fantasy (Angel/Riley, T) by angelus2hot

[Chaptered Fiction]

Save the Kid, Save the World - Season 3, Chapter 1 (Connor/OC, M) by Editor1

Come on Dawn, Chapter 8 (Spike/Buffy, NC-17) by MissLuci

The Tiger is Out, Chapter 66 (OC & Spike/Buffy, R) by Cosmic Tuesdays

Averting Disasters and Other Ways to Avoid Your Problems, Chapter 10 (Spike/Buffy, R) by JaneRemmington

I Almost Do, Chapter 3 (Spike/Buffy, R) by artemisthestargazer

Last Days of May, Chapter 1 (Spike/Buffy, T) by Myrabeth

[Images, Audio & Video]

Gifs: I am, you know (Willow/Tara, worksafe) by buffysource

Artwork: Faith (worksafe) by scourgiez-moar

Video: The Body (worksafe) by anomalykru

[Reviews & Recaps]

BOOM! Buffy the last vampire slayer #2 (continued) by Priceless, Stoney

PODCAST: Sleezy Sheldon - Angel S01E18 - Five by Five by Pop Culture Role Call

[Recs]

My favourite Spuffy fics by season recced by mcgnagallsarmy

Spuffy Fanfic Recommendations: Dark Revelations and a Mention of Scrapbooking by Priceless recced by Stoney

Reacting to Reactions: BtVS Season 5 by Stoney

[Community Announcements]

Nominations end Jan. 20th, and there aren't enough yet in any category at headlineawards

[Fandom Discussions]

I need a Buffy the Vampire remake where a trans girl... by inkdrinkershadowsinger

Like… what if you’re a gender-fluid potential? by jageshemashftw, girl4music

Part of me wonders what Angel and Anya’s interactions would have been like by oveliagirlhaditright, dontwarnthetadpoles

we never saw her make the same pun twice by torvagatai

Both Buffy and Firefly have these sexist, insecure asshole men (anti-Xander) by surreal-wanderer

Re: do you think spike would wear a skirt? by jjmaybank

I just want to know when [Spike] watched Nightmare Before Christmas by disco-tea

Riley lights up Season 4 (cont'd) (anti-Spuffy) by lhamze94

Riley...respect (cont'd) (anti-Spike) by lhamze94, Dora

Buffy and Spike - a rant (Spike is a special kind of evil) by bearforever7, AstridDante, Dora, Bop

Threading Through the Seasons (continued) by vampmogs and others

The Drug that the Watchers' Council uses in Helpless by American Aurora, Priceless, Stoney

Most shocking death? by Binkster1988 and others

Why was Snyder so hard on Buffy exactly? by Charcoal422 and others

The big issue with “The Wish” by rosees17

Willow was such a powerful witch and (even before she went dark) they didn't use her to their advantage. by kurtney_18

Xander is extremely overhated. by kurtney_18

Who is brainier: Giles or Wesley? by Leon-Bloxham

Anyone think Tara has a nice style of fashion? by 30rockplaza and others

How did you become a fan of the show? by dreamgirl_91 and others

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: When Joss Whedon Was Our Master by Gita Jackson (Vice)

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

[incorrectmlpships]

Starlight: More pancakes, Trixie. <3

Trixie: Mmm, of course. <3

Spike: ... Okay, what’s wrong with them?

Twilight: This is what happens when two people are into each other, but are also absolute narcissists.

Starlight: Oh no, I spilled coffee on my chest...!<3

Trixie: Oops, the syrups going down my lips... <3

Twilight: They’re both so used to using seduction that they have no idea how to actually flirt. But they’re also both too chickenshit to actually make a move, so they just carry on like this.

Twilight: Just like big... gay... peacocks.

Spike: ............ That’s actually really funny.

Twilight: Yes, it is.

[incorrectmlpships]

Flash Sentry: Captain, I’m asking for your permission to marry your sister.

Shining Armor: What is this, the dark ages? No, you know what, since you asked me, no you can not. You have to beat me in a duel first.

[incorrectmlpships]

Sandbar, to Yona: I love laying my head on your chest when we’re sleeping so I can hear you breathe.

Gallus, to Smolder: I recorded you snoring last night so you can hear how f***ing loud you are and why I can’t f***ing sleep.

[incorrectmlpships]

Starlight: ...Hey Trixie? Real talk, no bullshit: Do you think we got married too quickly?

Trixie: Yeah, obviously.

Starlight: Yeah, me too... Do you still want to stay married?

Trixie: Yeah, obviously.

Starlight: Yeah, me too...... Was that the whole conversation?

Trixie: I... I think it was!

Starlight: THAT WAS SO EASY!!

Trixie: WE ARE SO STUPID!!

[incorrectmlpships]

Silverstream: Pff, I am so over Ocellus. It was just a silly crush!

Smolder: Mmmhmm...

Ocellus: Hi Silverstream.

Silverstream: Nevermind!

Smolder: Weak.

[incorrectmlpships]

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: What are you doing?! We’re blowing this!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: What am I supposed to do?! We don’t even know what made her like us in the first place!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: Look, it’s fine, hard part’s over. As long as she doesn’t throw us any curveballs, I think we’ll be okay.

Smolder: Sooo... What should we do now?

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: F***!!!!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: What is she talking about ‘Do now’?! What the heck comes next?!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: I don’t know! All the dating sims go to credits at this point...

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: Well, she asked us a question. We have to say something!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: Look, just say anything. Just, say it with confidence.

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: Um... Alright, here goes.

Gallus: We should get married.

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: NOOOOOOO!!!!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: YOU SAID SAY ANYTHING!!!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: ANYTHING EXCEPT THAT OBVIOUSLY!!!!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: I’m sorry! I don’t work well under pressure!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: Look, it’s fine, we’ll just play it off as a joke. No harm done.

Smolder: Yes! Let’s do it!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #1: YOU FOOL!!! YOU’VE DOOMED US ALL!!!

Gallus’ Brain Cell #2: H-Hey! She seems pretty happy about it! Maybe she knows something we don’t?

Smolder’s Brain Cell #1: WHY THE F*** DID YOU SAY YES?!

Smolder’s Brain Cell #2: I DON’T KNOOOOOOW!!!!

[incorrectmlpships]

Sans Smirk: We have to help Mr. Sandwich. I would do anything to see him smile again.

Factory Worker: Seriously, what do you see in that guy?

Sans Smirk: He makes me laugh.

[incorrectmlpships]

*Smolder walks into her dorm room... and sees Gallus waiting for her*

Gallus: Hey... I brought cider! Best I could afford on a student’s salary.

*Gallus hurriedly turns on record player for ‘mood music’*

Gallus: Er... So... If you were a griffon, I’d compliment your crest or your wings. So... Your... Horns look good, and your wings look... very supportive.

*Smolder can barely hold back laughing*

Gallus: Hopefully that’s not offensive in dragon culture. Dang, I knew I should have read those books Ocellus gave me. Throw me a line here, Smolder!

Smolder: Woah, consider me seduced, smooth talker. Now shut up and stop worrying.

Gallus: Heh, I-I just... I’ve seen so many things go wrong, Smolder. Growing up homeless in Griffonstone, what happened with Cozy Glow. I just want one thing to go right. Just one-

*Smolder kisses him*

[incorrectmlpships]

Yona: I’m cold.

Sandbar: Here, take my jacket.

Smolder: … Hey, Gallus. I’m cold too.

Gallus: Well damn Smolder, I can’t control the weather.

Silverstream: Hmm… Hey, Ocellus. I’m a little cold.

Ocellus: *looking up from her book* What? Why didn’t you say anything? *takes off her jacket and puts it on Silverstream* I keep telling you to remember these things… *takes off scarf and wraps it around her* But, no, you have to be so forgetful… *steals a passing pony’s hat and puts it on Silverstream* And now I have to take care of you again-

[incorrectmlpships]

Smolder: Gallus! You’re okay! I’m so happy, I could kiss you!

Gallus: Um………. Neat!

(Sometime later, Gallus is lying facefirst on his bed with Ocellus reading a textbook)

Gallus: I can’t believe I said ‘neat’, Ocellus. Neat?! Nobody says ‘neat’ anymore. It’s the goddang 21st century! It’s not neat to say neat. But I said it anyway because I’m a huge loser.

Ocellus: (Casually turning a page) It’s not that bad, Gallus. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when Silverstream confessed she liked me?

Gallus: Didn’t you thank her?

Ocellus: (Closing her book, staring off into the distance) I thanked her…

[incorrect-housepets-quotes]

Bino: Who ate my food!? Max!

*10 seconds later*

Bino: That was me 10 seconds ago. I was very angry, but then I realized friendship is more important.

*15 seconds later*

Bino: That was me 15 seconds ago, screw it. *Kicks down door* MAX!!!

[incorrect-housepets-quotes]

Tarot: You think I enjoy playing Den Mother to you morons!

*Litterally everyone in Babylon Gardens stares incredulously* Tarot: ... Okay, fine. It's like crack to me.

[incorrect-housepets-quotes]

King: Bailey honey, we need to talk.

Bailey: Uh oh. What's wrong? Have I... done somethi-

Fox: It's all the cosplaying, cuz.

Bailey: ... I... What?

King: Y'know, your... costumes.

Bailey: It's Halloween! Am I not allowed to dress up!?

Fox: Yeeeeaaah but you get... Super into it. Remember last year when you dressed up as the Devil and you sang the ENTIRE discography to Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny?

*Flashback* Bailey: I'M THE DEVIL I LOVE METAL!!!

Fox: Remember how weird that was?

Bailey: Those riffs were f***ing tasty, Fox!

King: Or the year you dressed up as a Valkyrie and terrorized the town on horseback.

*Flashback* Bailey: VALHALLA AWAITS!!!

King: You trampled three people and you kidnapped Max.

Bailey: He was chosen as a worthy candidate for Valhalla!

Fox: Let's not even get into the whole 'My servants never die!' thing.

King: Like it's hot, but it's extra. It's way WAY hot, but a little over the top.

Fox: King, we get it, you think it's hot. But this is an interven-

King: I would literally lay myself out as a rug for you to step on, but this has to stop. The dressing up, not the stepping. Y-you could still do that.

Bailey: ...

Fox: ...

Sasha: *shoving King aside* Okay, this lovesick idiot is getting us nowhere. Bailey, I can appreciate you going above and beyond the call of cosplay. But everytime you go more extra, Duchess sees it as a challenge and tries to one-up you. It's getting weird.

*Meanwhile, Duchess is literally lying in an empty grave.*

Duchess: Pour the dirt in Bino.

Bino: Duchess, this is ridiculous.

Duchess: Bury me alive for Halloween, Bino! BAILEY HAS A WITCH COSTUME!!!

Jessica: This town is freaking weird.