#stupidest shit. the STUPIDEST fucking shit.

[the-ace-with-spades]

(this is inspired by a buddie post but doesn't relate at all to 911)

for once, they're not exes, they're could've-beens

The Daggers are loitering around the Hard Deck a few months after the mission and somehow the topic rolls onto how they all met each other

One way or another, Bob admits he had a huge crush on Phoenix for like the first few weeks when they met

And everyone teases him to the point he's getting a bit shy, so to not overdo it on him, Fanboy pops in and says that, Hey, I had a huge crush on Reuben when we met during training as well, it's not that bad.

And instead, everyone moans that it doesn't count because they're married and Payback is all 'oh you had a crush on me? that's so embarrassing' while Fanboy just rolls his eyes at him.

So Fritz is like, 'Pretty sure everyone on base but Halo knew I had a crush on her, I just kept saying the stupidest shit around her,' which prompts Harvard and Yale to quote more and more outrageous sentences while Halo nearly snorts up the beer she's drinking

Bob is still really red and really quiet so Phoenix, attempting to get him to relax about the whole thing and not make a big deal out of it is like, 'Yeah, it's normal, lots of people have crushes on their co-workers, especially when they spend hours on end together. Look at Bradshaw over here, he used to be Mr. Heart Eyes for Hangman, you could've done much worse."

Before she realizes that, you know, no one was supposed to know this, it's already out of her mouth.

Bradley kicks her under the table and fucking freezes, avoidings anyone's gaze and bites down the urge to bang his head on the table.

Because, you know, back when he and Jake were still in training, they had what Jake thought was a friendly rivalry - it was actually just Bradley doing stupid shit to impress him and it flying over, figuratively and literally, Jake's oblivious head. They spent a lot of time together and it was very easy for Bradley to let himself just be in the moment and not think about the crush thing so he kinda ignored and ignored and before he knew it, it had been years.

Shit changed when Jake started ditching their after-work meet-ups to hook up with one of the flight engineers with whom he developed a bit of a coworkers-with-benefits relationship. And Bradley had to watch and hear about it on almost every occasion, every day.

Bradley said to himself that enough is enough because the crush was becoming embarrassingly not-crush-like and he decided he was not being that lame and would move on. Easier said than done - he tried to distance himself but he and Jake worked together every day and were friends so eventually all Bradley could do was the good old out of sight, out of mind method and he transferred without telling Jake.

Which is why Jake was so pissed with him. Because, well, Bradley was the closest thing he had to a best friend before he met Javy, and he just left Jake behind without explanation, one day there, the next one already in Japan, like it was nothing. (Jake does not realize that but he did actually have a bit of a crush on Bradley back then as well, he certainly didn't see him the same way he sees Javy...)

So, no, Jake was never supposed to find out, definitely not now when they're kinda friends again.

So, when very disbelieving You had a crush on Hangman? is thrown at him a few times and Jake is just staring at him from across the table saying nothing, Bradley pulls a lie out of his ass.

"He had a nice ass, nice smile, and very nice tits. I was young and stupid. It's not that big of deal."

It raises some eyebrows and snickers. "Seriously?"

"I found him hot, what's so surprising in that? We all have eyes."

There is a second of confusion but then everyone kinda nods along because, well, Jake is objectively attractive. "I thought he was hot, I wanted to impress him but instead we just got into a pissing contest of who is better at this or that and then I just, moved on."

"So, when did you stop crushing on him?"

"When I realized how big of a mouth he had on him," Bradley says, which is the biggest lie he's ever said - he liked Jake's big mouth an embarrassing amount. "Just couldn't stop yapping on and on."

This finally fucking awakes Jake enough to protest, "I don't yap."

And thankfully, the topic smoothly moves onto bullying Jake.

Bradley ignores the whole fucking thing because if he doesn't, he's going to get bitter, and if he gets bitter, he'll have to admit to himself why. And he's moved on, okay, he was fine all this years he's spent in Japan, he's fine now. It's not like Jake would ever give him a second glance anyway.

Meanwhile, Jake comes back home that night and can't sleep. Because Bradley thought he was hot. Bradley had a crush on him.

Or rather Bradley had thought Jake was hot, Bradley had a crush on him - past tense. He didn't even know this was an option and now he missed it, apparently by years.

And he can't stop thinking about it because he could have Bradley and he keeps imagining how their life could look right now if he didn't miss his chance when he had it. And every time he sees Bradley, he gets a reminder - it's all past tense, chance missed, nothing he can do about it, Bradley had moved on.

And Bradley notices that Jake is now acting weird around him, all quite and staring at him when he thinks he can't notice but avoiding him as best as he can any other time. And Bradley can only find one variable that changed just as Jake's started getting weird around him - and that's finding out that Bradley had a crush on him.

So that's great.

[metyouinthehallway]

I’ve been a part of multiple fandoms throughout the years but the sturniolo fandom is by far the most dramatic, most infuriating one.

I was a directioner when the whole Louis & Zayn smoking pot shit went down and that wasn’t nearly as bad as this bs. I think a lot of people expect too much from the triplets in regards to certain things, I think finding their fucking voting records is such an invasion of privacy, I think hating on Madi to the point of it affecting her mental health and driving her away from being in their content is heartbreaking. Then you turn around and say you miss her being in the videos? Make up your mind holy shit.

Half of the ‘fandom’ is pre teen girls who genuinely think Chris is gonna drop down on his knees and propose to them. I’m considered the ‘older’ part of the fandom so I do think I have the upper hand when it comes to thinking more logically about certain things regarding the triplets.

Constantly trying to cancel them just because they’re successful? Don’t get me wrong, I agree with over half of the things I see on tumblr about them but jfc, cash & maverick going on their pod & calling them out for the stupidest fuck shit? The whole ownership of space camp thing? The Matt hitting Nick thing?? Like what are we DOING?

TikTok bitches calling tumblr users crazy for writing smut about the triplets as if the same age range weren’t reading about Ethan Dolan fucking them sideways? Like give me a break, smut and fan fiction is gonna be a part of every fandom whether you like it or not. If you don’t… simply don’t read it!

And don’t even get me started on the mfs that take the triplets side on everything, it’s okay to disagree with a few white boys from Boston. It’s okay to not like some of the things they do! Just because Matt doesn’t like ketchup doesn’t mean you don’t have to eat it!

Moral of the story, sometimes I hate this damn fandom🤍

[remperoni-melt]

Suspended

Matt Rempe x Short!Alt!Fem!Reader

Kinks used: mirrors, praise, degradation, choking, size, breath play, scratching, begging, biting, marking, unprotected, cream pie, blood (brief), spit (brief)

*Another user, @cuteandhughesy got the same request and we decided to release our own versions. I HIGHLY recommend reading her version as well as well as all of her other work. She’s extremely talented with her writing and I promise, you’ll find something written by her that you love!

The elevator came to a halt, causing both of us to let out frustrated groans. Red light bathed us, casting a somewhat apocalyptic glow over us. Our surroundings felt weirdly synonymous with the thoughts occupying our heads.

“Call button’s not working.” The tall man sighed and ran a hand over his face in frustration.

“So we’re fucked for the night?” I sighed as well, a scoff and an eye-roll following to accompany my annoyance and disbelief.

“Probab-fucking-ly.” The man said sarcastically and sat down on the floor. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and sighed again. “Cute. No signal.” He muttered to himself. “You got anything?” He asked, lifting his head to look at me. I looked at my phone as well and tried to send a few texts to some friends, my roommate, a neighbor. Nothing.

“Nope.” I answered, popping the ‘p’ of the word. The man let out a frustrated laugh, shaking his head as he tilted his head back. I sat down as well, a sigh falling from my lips. “So, what do we do?” I asked with a small shrug.

“I don’t know. 20 questions?” He asked sarcastically, his tone mocking.

“Fuck it.” I shrugged in response. He looked at me with annoyance and disdain before sighing and rolling his eyes. “Start trying to guess what it is.” I encouraged him.

“Is it an elevator?” He asked bluntly, irritation evident in his voice.

“Damn, you’re good.” I said with a slight smirk. He couldn’t help but let out a little bit of a chuckle, he had to admit I had a sense of humor. Or… I tried to, at least. Given our current circumstances, what else could I really do?

“Okay, 20 questions was a bust.” He said with an amused chuckle. “What about,” he paused to think, looking up at the mirrored ceiling. “I don’t know. Random trivia? Random shit. We can just quiz each other on… whatever.” He suggested as I moved to sit across from him, leaning back against the wooden wall behind me.

“Why not?” I shrugged again. “You’re going first this time though.” I nodded in his direction.

“Fair enough.” He answered in a bored, monotone voice. Despite the tension of the situation, the conversation was flowing pretty fluidly. We were both clearly still annoyed, but we were trying to make it work. “Who was the only person to knock out Muhammad Ali in a heavyweight title fight?” He asked with a smug grin.

“I’m 4’11 and I look like I just stepped off the set of The Craft. You expect me to know the answer to that?” I asked, drawing a sharp laugh from the giant man across from me. “Fucking… I don’t know, uhhh…” I thought about it and decided to just go for the stupidest answer I could think of. “John fucking Cena? I don’t know sports like that, man.” I groaned in annoyance.

“You could’ve said fucking Elmo and it would’ve been a better guess.” He sighed and shook his head, a playful smile tugging at his lips. “Larry Holmes.”

“Who the H-E-double-honest-to-god-fuck is that?” I asked in mock offense. “Anyway, my turn.” I said over his laughter. “What does M&M stand for?” I asked him, a challenging glint in my eyes.

“Uhh…” He seemed stumped as he bit his lip in thought. I took the opportunity to look him over.

He was absolutely stunning. Tall. Like, really fucking tall. He had brown hair and these gorgeous dark brown eyes that I couldn’t help but get lost in. His facial features were pure art, like he was a sculpture made specifically for me to fawn over. He had a muscular yet somewhat lanky build but it still drew me in. His scent carried from across the small space of the elevator and holy shit. It was intoxicating. He smelled like the slightest bit of mint, something woodsy and ashy, and… cold. The man was the personification of seduction. Sex incarnate. I feared I may have gotten addicted to him before I was able to even get a proper taste. I tried to look away before he realized I was staring, so I averted my gaze to the mirrored ceiling, as if that made my predicament any better.

“Mars and Mercury? Because the Mars company?” He took his best guess. I was actually kind of impressed. Especially with that voice. Smooth, deep, thick Canadien accent. With each word, I swam… but I wouldn’t mind completely drowning in his voice if he’d let me.

“Close, actually.” I praised him subtly. “Mars and Murrie.” I corrected him.

“Why the fuck do you know that?” He asked with the most charmingly sexy lopsided smirk I’d ever seen in my life. I just shrugged with a small laugh. I didn’t trust my words right now. He made me way too nervous for me to keep my voice steady. “You okay?” He asked, nodding his chin in my direction. Fuck, he must’ve noticed how nervous I am. Shit. Fuck. Uhhhhh. Say something! Fuck!

“Yeah! Just stuck in an elevator. You?” I said with a slight laugh. YOU AWKWARD FUCKING IDIOT! Oh my god. Why would you say that? No fucking shit, he’s stuck with you! Dumbass! Is he laughing? Oh shit. Is he laughing at you or did he take it as sarcasm?

“Fair point. Not an ideal situation.” He spoke up. Oh thank fuck. He took it as sarcasm.

“Why don’t we play truth or dare?” I blurted out. Truth or dare? What? Are we in fucking middle school? Why the fuck would you even suggest that? Oh my god.

“Truth or dare? What is this? Middle school?” He asked with a chuckle, looking around at our surroundings. See?! Fucking idiot…

“No!” I said a little too quickly and a lot too loudly. I quickly cleared my throat to try to make up for how awkward I was being. “We might as well get to know each other since we’re trapped here for who knows how long.” I suggested. “Truth or dare could be an entertaining way to do that.” I stated with a nonchalant shrug. Good save, girl! He suspects nothing. Hopefully.

“I guess.” He laughed with a shrug. “I’ll bite. Truth or dare?” Speaking of bite…

“Dare.” I replied. I decided to be bold. Why not? I can’t run away, might as well just embarrass myself and get it done with.

“Dare you to tell me your name.” He said, his smooth voice echoing off the wooden elevator walls. My eyes met his and I found my lips pulling up into a small but slightly flirty smirk, involuntarily, obviously.

“____.” I answered in a more confident tone. I leaned forward and extended my hand towards him which he accepted without a second thought. His large hand completely engulfed my smaller one, his grip firm, polite, and gentle all at the same time. His skin was warm, a stark contrast to mine which tended to be freezing cold for some reason. He flashed me a warm smile as we leaned back against our respective walls again, our eyes locking again for a few seconds before we both quickly looked away. The energy in the confined space felt somewhat charged and I wondered if he felt it too or if it was just the absurdity of our situation. “Truth or dare?”

“Truth.” He cleared his throat. He decided to play it safe and I couldn’t blame him. It’s not like we could escape any awkwardness or each other right now. There was tension between us but I wasn’t sure if it sexual, aggression-based, or something else entirely.

“What’s your name?” I asked him. He knew mine so it was only fair to ask him now. He sighed but a hint of a smile graced his face.

“Matt.” He answered simply. He didn’t seem to want to be answering my questions. In fact, he looked like he’d rather be anywhere else but here. Can’t say I blame him, really. “Truth or dare?” He sighed with a roll of his eyes.

“Truth.” I said, still avoiding eye contact. He was pretty, but he was intimidating.

“You seeing anyone?” He subtly nodded his chin towards me as he asked his question. Maybe I was wrong? His voice was slightly deeper than before and I felt a flutter in my chest. My breath caught in my throat and my eyes snapped back to his. He was surprisingly bold despite the arrogance and annoyance that radiated off of him. I wasn’t sure if I liked that or not yet.

“No.” I shook my head subtly as I tried to stop my breathing from becoming shallow. The rise and fall of my chest definitely gave away how affected I was though. I didn’t want him to see the power he had over me. He seemed like an asshole. But… he was at least trying, I guess? “Truth or dare?” My voice was hoarse and quiet, almost unlike my own.

“Truth.” His gaze was intense and his voice was unwavering. His cold eyes never left mine and I felt myself slipping further and further into the clutches of this captivating man who I now knew as Matt. I took a shaky deep breath, preparing myself to speak again.

“What do you do for a living?” I tried to alleviate some of the tension that was building between us.

“Work.” He answered quickly as he adjusted his body to sit up straighter, crossing his arms over his chest. “Do I make you nervous?” He asked bluntly.

“You didn’t even ask me to choose.” I replied with my eyes locked intently on his, not even acknowledging that he didn’t even give an actual answer to my question either.

“Didn’t have to,” he shook his head slightly, “you’re too worked up to choose anything besides truth right now.” His assumption was straight-forward, but not inaccurate.

“Try me.” I narrowed my eyes at him. I wasn’t sure if I was more annoyed at his audacious attempt to psychoanalyze me in the moment or the situation we were in, but I decided to challenge him. He may be able to read me like a book right now, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t still try to trip him up. I watched him scoff and bite the insides of his cheeks, the annoyance obviously affecting him as well.

“So, you’re choosing dare then?” He questioned me with raised eyebrows. I kept up my facade, determined to win this little dick measuring contest we had found ourselves in. He nodded slowly before a sentence left his mouth that caused me to freeze. “I dare you to take your hoodie off then.” I took another deep breath and set my jaw in determination. His is bigger. It’s definitely bigger.

“Fine.” I said, my tone laced with challenge. I pulled my hoodie over my head and tossed it to the side, leaving me in a black lace bra and a pair of jeans that hung loosely off my hips. I was set on maintaining my faux act of confidence. I sat there unmoving as I watched his eyes shamelessly roam over my curves. “Truth or dare?” I asked in a slightly raspier voice, my jaw set tightly.

“Truth.” He said but I wasn’t sure if he was even aware he was answering. His eyes were drinking me in and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. He was absolutely 100% unapologetic with his gaze. He objectified me like I only existed as a device of his pleasure. He looked at me like a piece of meat. Like I was nothing. I think I liked it.

“How miserable are you in this elevator right now?” My voice was softer, a hint more seductive, completely unbeknownst to me.

“So fucking miserable.” He all but groaned out the words. His voice was raspy but breathy, a symptom of the effect I was beginning to have on him. His eyes finally darted back to mine. His eyes were slightly wider than before, more pleading. More… needy. “Truth or dare, ____?” The way my name dripped off his tongue sent a subtle shiver down my spine and I swallowed hard.

“Dare.” I all but breathed out the word as our sights stayed locked on each other’s.

“Lose the jeans.” His words were still groaned and that’s probably the only reason I didn’t even question his reasoning. Hearing the desperation and need in his voice was getting me so hot and I couldn’t stop myself from wanting him. Without a thought or any hesitation, I stripped the jeans off, revealing the full matching black lace set I was wearing. A chuckle fell from him as his eyes took me in again, his bottom lip caught snug between his teeth.

“Truth or-“ I began but he cut me off quickly.

“Dare.” The word was rushed, a demand.

“Shirt.” I didn’t even have to elaborate. He knew exactly what I meant and he swiftly pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it to the side. He was a lot more muscular than I expected. Talk about a sleeper build. His chest rose and fell as we took each other in. “Dare.” I said as he opened his mouth to speak. He smirked and his eyes darkened.

“Come here.” He said and patted his lap. Without protest, I obliged. As soon as I was within arms reach, he grabbed me and pulled me onto his lap. He groaned softly at the feeling of my back against his chest, a throaty chuckle following the sound. “Truth.” He breathed the word into my ear, his breath fanning across my skin, causing my back to arch off of his body.

“What are you thinking about right now?” I whispered, tilting my head back against his chest to lock eyes with him.

“Dare.” He said with a smirk, clearly not wanting to answer the question.

“I dare you to demonstrate what you’re thinking about.” My eyes drifted from his eyes, to his lips, and back up to his eyes again. A shit eating grin broke out on his face before he dipped his head down and pressed his lips against mine. My arms reached up above me and tangled in his hair while his ran up and down my sides, his giant hands stopping to grip at my hips and my ribs. We were rough and desperate right away, hungry for each other like we had been deprived of this forever. Which, in a way, I guess we technically had? He bit my lower lip, drawing a hissed gasp from me. His tongue ran over the spot he bit to soothe it but at the taste of blood, he sucked my lip into his mouth to stop the bleeding. Seconds later though, his tongue delved into my mouth, his tongue slowly swirling around mine. Sloppily, our tongues stroked each others, swirled around each others, sucked on each others. We pulled back with a thick string of saliva still connecting us, both of us breathing heavily. “Dare.” I whispered breathlessly.

“We’re still doing this?” He smirked, licking my lips to break the string connecting us. “Dare you to sit pretty and let me do whatever the fuck I want to you.” I swear to god this man is walking, living, breathing sex. This stranger makes me so fucking weak and I don’t know how. I love it though. All I did was nod and keep my eyes on his. My breath caught in my throat as his hand slowly slid down my stomach and into my soaked panties. “Did I do this to you, baby?” He smirked as he slowly dragged his middle finger up the slick slit under his hands, causing my body to tremble slightly. “That feel good?” He murmured as he began slowly circling his finger around my clit. When his finger brushed against my clit piercing, my body stiffened slightly and I let out a little whimper. “Oh? What’s that, baby doll?” His finger brushed against it again.

“Piercing.” My voice was shaky as I looked down at his hand under the black lace.

“You like watching me play with you?” His voice was deep and raspy, his lips brushing the shell of my ear in a feather light touch.

“Mhm.” I bit my lip and nodded, watching him continue his slow movements. I heard him let out a chuckle before I felt his other giant hand wrap around my tiny neck and yank me back. He forced my face to look at the mirrored ceiling, his grip on the sides of my neck tight.

“Watch yourself, angel.” He practically growled, his hand on my clit circling faster and faster, causing me to squirm under him. I trained my eyes on my reflection above us. I was so fucking small compared to him. “Look at you,” he murmured. “So tiny and pathetic, writhing around for me like a bitch in heat.” He spat out the words. “You always get this wet and desperate for guys you just meet?” He smirked at me through our reflections.

“No sir.” I forced out the words, my tiny hands gripping onto the bicep of his arm that was teasing me.

“Sir?” He looked down at me in amusement. “Good girl. I like that.” He moved his hand faster, applying more pressure. My back lifted off his chest again as I felt a knot form in my stomach. “Pathetic little slut getting close?” His voice was teasing. I couldn’t speak, just nod. Then, he ripped his hand away, right when I was at the edge.

“Matt.” I whimpered. He brought me up to my knees by his grip on my throat and roughly pushed me forward. I caught myself on my hands and heard him fumble with his belt behind me.

“Sir.” He corrected before aggressively pushing my head down to the cool elevator floor. He moved the lace of my panties aside and swiftly plunged himself inside me, not giving me a second to adjust to his size. Starting with slow but hard thrusts, he kept his hand on my head, keeping it pushed into the ground.

“Yes sir.” I whimpered out the words with each of his thrusts.

“Such a pretty little whore.” He groaned. He gave a few more brutal thrusts before he slowly extracted himself from me and flipped me over on my back. He picked me up with ease, wrapping my legs around his hips and carefully standing up. Pushing me up against the wall, he tilted my chin up roughly again to look at the ceiling. “Look how pathetic you look already.” He smirked, holding my face in place. “I barely even fucked you, Princess.” His lips dropped to my neck and he immediately started sucking, biting, and licking at my pulse point.

“Oh fuck.” I whispered out a moan. My hands tangled in his hair again as I struggled to watch him work through our reflection on the mirrored ceiling. “So good.” I whimpered.

“You want more, baby doll?” He groaned against my skin, licking up from my collarbone to my jawline, nipping at my pulse point again. “You wanna get fucked like a pretty little slut? You want me to stretch this little hole out over my dick?” He chuckled and gave my throat a squeeze. “Want me to ruin you for anyone else? Turn you into my cute little plaything?”

“Yes sir.” I gasped softly, fighting the urge to look at him.

“Beg for it, pretty girl.” He growled in my ear, squeezing my throat tighter and drawing a pathetic squeak from my lips.

“Please, sir.” I gasped. “Hurt me. Do whatever the fuck you want to me. I’ll be so good for you.” The words came out in a rushed whisper as I finally looked back at his face. “Tell me what you want me to do,” I breathed out the words as my eyes locked on his. “Turn me into your braindead little cock sleeve.” I nibbled on his earlobe gently. “Ruin me.” He didn’t need anything else because he was inside me again within seconds, slamming in and out with reckless abandon.

“God, all you can think about is getting fucked, huh?” He groaned through his thrusts. He went so hard and fast that my moans were transitioning into screams. His hand flew over my mouth as he hit my g spot as hard as he could, grinding his tip against it. “You want everyone to know I’m passing the time by fucking this tight little hole?” He growled in my ear. “Such a desperate little bitch. Need me all to yourself, right?” He punctuated his question with another hard hit to my g spot. “Need everyone to know how good you’re getting fucked right now?” He let go of my mouth and I immediately sunk my teeth into his shoulder to keep myself quiet. “Yeah, show me how good I make you feel. Little fucking cock slut.” He hissed.

“Fuck me like you mean it, sir.” I hissed in his ear. He ripped my body off the wall and next thing I knew, my back was on the floor and his hips were snapping forward faster than before. We were going at it like crack addicts. “Oh my fucking god, you’re so pretty.” I groaned as my gaze landed on our bodies in the mirrored ceiling above. My vision was hazy but I could still see the marks he had left on my neck and collarbone. I saw how his body moved with mine and how my legs wrapped around his hips in a desperate attempt to get him closer.

“You wanna cum, don’t you, pretty baby?” He teased, his voice rough and breathy in my ear. “You want me to show you what getting fucked right should feel like?” He ground his hips against my g spot again.

“Make me cum, sir. Please.” I begged in a breathy whisper. He growled out a laugh and bit my neck. Hard.

“I’m gonna fucking break you.” He laughed as his hand slid between our bodies, his fingers circling my clit again. With the combination of his dick practically splitting me in half and his hand going crazy on my clit, I knew I wasn’t gonna last long. “Pathetic little slut. Look at you. You’re already shaking.” He said in a mocking tone.

“Feels so good!” The words were shaky and forced but they still caused him to groan and rest his forehead against mine. I felt a knot forming in my stomach and I dug my nails into the back of his neck, desperate for something to hold onto.

“That’s it, babygirl. Let it out. Show me what the fuck I do to you.” His words, once again, were growled out. This time through gritted teeth. “Pathetic little fucking slut. Cum for me.” His lips fell to my neck again where he started leaving more dark marks. He started thrusting deeper, his hand applying more pressure on my clit. “You’re doing so good, baby. My perfect little hole. Pretty little whore.”

“Oh fuck, MATT!” I had to use my hand to muffle myself as I came, screaming his name. My back lifted off the ground and my hips ground against his involuntarily as my body shook violently and my walls fluttered around him, grasping him tightly and releasing. Over and over and over again. My nails dragged down his back, over and over as I rode out my high on him. The tracks prickled with blood as low groans and hisses escaped him but he never stopped.

“Oh god, ____.” It didn’t take him long to cum after me. His thrusts had gotten harder, bruising even. His hands dug into my hips and he kept grinding against my g spot, daring to draw another orgasm out of me. When his hips started stuttering and his breathing grew more shallow, I knew he was almost there.

“Almost there, Matt. Fuck me like you own me.” I encouraged him to chase his high. He was so fucking close and I needed him to cum. I needed him to feel just as good, if not better, than he made me feel.

“I do own you.” He growled as he placed his hand on my throat, choking me again. “My personal cum dump now, yeah?” His body started shaking more. He was right. Fucking. There. “____.” He moaned and with one final thrust, I felt him twitch inside me. He kept thrusting, determined to dump everything he had in me.

“There you go. Fill me up like the good little cumslut I am for you, sir.” I giggled and ran my hands through his hair as he fucked himself through his high. He finally pulled out after a few minutes, smirking down at my breathless form on the ground.

“You look so pretty dripping with my cum.” He said in a small voice. “All pathetic and fucked out. All because of me.” He leaned over my breathless body to place a gentle kiss on my lips.

“Thank you.” The words came out in heavy breaths and my eyes locked with his. Without another word, he got dressed again. In my fucked out state, he carefully dressed me as well, placing gentle kisses along my body as he went.

“You did good, ____.” He murmured and pulled me into his chest. “Took me like a good girl.” He praised me.

“You did good too, sir.” I mumbled as I curled up in his lap and laid my head against his chest.

“You tired?” He asked in a soft voice. I answered him with a quiet hum and a subtle nod of my head. “Get some sleep. They’ll wake us up when they get us out.” He whispered.

We fell asleep like that and weirdly enough, I felt calm despite the situation we found ourselves in. Suspended in a box who knows how many floors up with a stranger, not knowing when we’d get out, and here we were. Holding each other like we had known each other forever. There was something so… serene. Was it the stress relief? Possibly. Regardless, I felt a lot less agitated and I think he did too.

At least we’ll get out of here on better terms than we walked in here on, right?

[energievie]

GALLADRABBLES #160 - DINNER PARTY

Dearest N'dia @twinklyylights , the only thing I could think of was the movie Dinner for Schmucks. Took some liberties with it, but I hope you approve 😝 Paging @galladrabbles 😎

---

This is the stupidest shit he's said yes to in his entire life. All sorts of weirdos around the table and way too many questions from the ones who are clearly better dressed: about the South Side, about his sperm donor, about his knuckle tats.

And yet it clicks only when the ginger across from him starts getting drilled about his bipolar.

“Wait a minute, I know what the fuck this is. That movie, Dinner for Schmucks…”

Widened eyes and sheepish smiles confirm it.

He gets up, upending his chair in the process.

“Bunch of fuckin’ assholes! You comin’, Red?”

---

[lizstiel]

the embroidered overalls so we knew he named his kid dean.

[dizzybizz]

KAEYA BIRTHDAY ??? ?? i love you mr alberich sir i love you oh so so so much.

uh dialogue for this one but more legible under the cut (and a messy ragbros page)

Klee: Kaeya! Come down here! Kaeya: Oh? heh. What is it, Spark Knight?

Klee: Happy Birthday! It is today? Right? I even double-checked with Albedo and everything but I don't know... Klee: It's a Calla Lily! You like those, right? Kaeya: I certainly do! Thank y- Klee: Oh. Klee: OK OK OK- Kaeya: Hm? Klee: Kaeya you have to promise to not tell Master Jean about this one! Kaeya: You can count on me to keep my lips sealed.

Klee: OK! Close your eyes- eye- and hold out your hands! Kaeya: Mhm! Klee: OK! You can open them! TA-DA~!

Klee: I made a bomb for you! It even has an eyepatch! He can look after you when I'm somewhere else. Take good care of him! Oh yeah- He explodes if you- Kaeya?

Kaeya: Thank you Klee! Thank you very much! Klee: You're VERY welcome Kaeya!

a lil ragbros too.... kaeya and his red siblings amirite (bursts into tears).. also i am so obsessed with chibi diluc saying "bring em in..."

[stealingyourbones]

I just finished reading the 2016 Batman run for funsies and I haven’t had the time to touch it yet.

Bruce;

falls from the moon (and survives)

goes through hundreds of dimensions to fight The “Joker” that Makes Other Jokers

gets shot near the heart at least 4 times, gets his hand cut off, stabbed through the chest, all while barely even functioning and still kicking ass

f ights alternate versions of his rogues gallery (and some of his friends) all of whom are more insane/mentally broken/venomed tf up. Again, while barely functioning

Utilizes a bat uniform from The Dark Knight Returns Universe, the utility belt of Adam West’s Batman, and uses shark repellant against a giant shark with joker paint on it that’s devouring the concept of Gotham.

I’m not even touching the failsafe comic intricacies where he gets blasted into another dimension, nearly all of his buddies get their shit rocked by robots made a suppressed alternate personality of himself made in case Batman went too far and killed someone (it was staged. Copplepot died). And so much more.

The very rough notes I gave were summarizing 10 total comics.

When I tell you that literally anyone from the DC universe wouldn’t bat an eye at Danny’s history, stories, rogues gallery, the fights he’s had, everything. I mean it

They’d absolutely be devistated a kid had to do so much at so young and deal with that much pressure as a child. But they damn sure wouldn’t be shocked. This is simply them doing the rounds of figuring out a new hero and their motivations

[mr-president]

breaking: #1 loser girlfailure explodes bitchy blond bimbos to smithereens

[finalgirlsamwinchester]

guy who so desperately tries to find god. who wants to have faith in a higher authority to guide him out of the hole he's in. from the weight of guilt from simply existing, as the person he is. but every time he thinks he's answered his higher calling it turns out he's made the Morally Incorrect choice and his path to goodness and holiness was the road to the devil all along

[blueskittlesart]

Hope you're enjoying Ranma! I was a little worried it'd be bland, but I think I like it better than the original.

genuinely it feels like they looked directly into my head and were like ok let's make a show for this person specifically. the romance. the comedy. the fucking ridiculous concept. the transgenderism of it all. im obsessed

[voidsentprinces]

Oh and reminder, it took us last time four fucking days for this all to play out last time. Remember social media and news sites get more clicks if they make your heart jump in your throat or make you doom scroll. Don't let those pissants get you spinning plates and running in circles for them. If you got time to even look at their dumb ass "Will they won't they" headlines. You got time to play

FINAL FANTASY XIV NOW WITH A TRIAL WITH UP TO LEVEL 70 AND BOTH AWARD WINNING HEAVENSWARD AND STORMBLOOD EXPANSION

MONSTER HUNTER WILDS BETA IS NOW HERE

EGG MCEGGSON DAWN VEIL or...was it dread wolf? VEILGUARD!? I CANNOT REMEMBER BUT THATS OUT TOO!

Back log of games? Time to catch up.

And there's this new show I've heard about called Brigerton whose main plot point is fucking real life G'raha Tia...or something? Imma be honest with you I wasn't paying attention but shirtless Jonathan Bailey just kept appearing on my dash.

Speaking of which Jonathan Bailey won sexiest man alive awards this year. Thus making G'raha Tia the sexiest catboy in Eorzea.

Have you ever thought of replaying an old favorite? .hack//GU? Assassins Creed? FFVII is available on steam as is VIII, IX, and X.

ARE YOU BOSCH FON ROSENBERG!? Cause XII is also on there.

So much to do, so much to see, so whats wrong with taking the backstreets?

[yo-yo-yoshiko]

I— I’m laughing… I can’t… why did he DO that!? Waaaahahahha!!

Bonus... King as he normally is cause I need to make sure THAT's not the only image i draw of him:

[creepyscritches]

Defending a for-profit healthcare model to protect widespread access to basic care is the clown nose I never thought I'd wear but here we are. Some punks must honk during the workday.

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Well, at least Fukuzawa got his wish granted, I guess.... he's finally inside Fukuchi <3

[eugeniedanglars]

if you ever try to claim any type of platonic friendship between men is underrepresented in media i am not only blocking you i am exploding you with my mind

[skipitty-bop]

"I've never cast this spell before, it's- it's new to me I-I don't know. I've never-"

"You've NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE??! And you chose now to test out something like THAT??!"

"I've never done a lot of things before!"

OKAY SO HOW ABOUT I JUST DIE