#stupid oblivious bisexual robert here to fuck up the day

[laolafi]

Rosamund Painswick has a companion. An equally wealthy and spectacular socialite who lives right on the other side of Belgrave Square. Widowed at a young age, even younger than Rosamund, but around the same time Marmaduke Painswick died. Let's call her Alice.

They host the most spectacular soirées in their respective Belgravia homes. They travel the continent together, extensively. They collect art and become patrons for museums and collections that would later rise to global importance. That kind of thing. They raise Alice's children together – the Crawley girls wonder why they call her "Auntie Rummy". They're madly, deeply in love and it shows.

Over time, the family grows extremely fond of Alice. Robert, who had the hardest time accepting the situation and spent a lot of time indignantly huffing and puffing about it, most of all. It's just a basic fact, Aunt Rosamund comes with her companion or not at all.

When Maud Bagshaw appears and announces that she intends to make her young maid Lucy her companion, Robert jumps to all the wrong conclusions and is appropriately scandalised.