#stupid fucking turtleneck now in 3D

[onesidedradiostatic]

look at this fucking guy

[tiffany-loves-broadway]

Characters from Worm and Ward as @dril_gpt2 tweets

Wildbow: i wrote the post. sorry everyone.

Emma:  You fucking worm. Youre a foul, stinking rat. Fanart is pure garbage.

Skitter, pre-Leviathan:  my followers are wasting my time by asking me stupid shit like "where is my worm hole" and "where is my piss hole"

Tattletale:  13 Reasons Why Sasquatch Is Real

Bitch:  you know society is ASS-FUCKED when people spend tens of millions of dollars to maim and disfigure their dogs in an effort to appear more "INTP"

Panacea: im going to dress up like a nurse and perform emergency C-sections on the street to build self respect

Coil, on Dinah: Everything you say is true and good. no exceptions

Miss Militia: the idea that i would ever lose my shit on the computer board game "minesweeper" is one of the most despicable maladies ive ever suffered

Skitter, post-Leviathan: to the guy who paid me to distribute free toilet paper to the homeless in my hometown: thanks for 00000000000 \000 \000 .

Jack Slash: the human mind... is a funny little thing... called A Mind

Crawler: my ass has become highly immunized against fungal infections, by ingesting fantastic amounts of kfc

Cherish: sending my most powerful kiss to any image of blue jeans because i just want to die by suicide because my brain and body are FUCKED

Dragon: ...the US Navy's newest computer chip can now program itself to 'Play Pokemon' and evolve into a Pokemon with it ....

Simurgh: saddened to see that people woud gravitate towards gaming as a career path, rather than exclusively gravitate towards gaming during a time of crisis

Perdition: *does the dishes in reverse for shock value*

Watchdog:  INTRODUCTION TO THE GUILD OF THINKERS 1. who are these people whose opinions are worth less than mine to keep me away from the toilet 2. how do i add 3D effects to my hair 3. WHO CARES I DIDNT ADD 3D SHADES TO MY JUGGLY

Greg: well gotta go with the old adage "Dont forget to feed the trolls"

Valefor: causing your dick to hurt because you have too much respect for the Virgin Mary to engrave "666" onto the back of your dick

Weaver: I will do the right thing, and delete all my posts about eating maggots

Behemoth:  *glances towards the camera slowly becoming more and more skeletal*

Tecton: Geology is Theory. Geology is not Fact.

Heartbreaker:  me fucking ruining another wedding by asking the bride to marry me for $6. its just too hard

Glenn Chambers: the most important part of being a content producer is being able to mentally picture the Brands' Emblems on your fridge and never missing a Brand Point Update

Glenn Chambers, on Skitter: "i firmly believe that bugs should be banned," i continue, letting the video conclude. "But…" i pause to collect myself, "but…" i increase the volume

Riley: im sorry but how can i reconcile my increasingly loathsome behaviors with the cheerful, bubbly manner in which i am marketed

Clockblocker: according to wikipedia, the bed bugs and human fly larvae that burrow into my skin and organs are my soul mate

Andrew Richter: i am truly devastated to announce that the y2k bug is now officially classified as a feature

Scion:  1) Kill all the people 2)

The Elite:  to the distrusted: To the disappointed: Towards the hungry: I will not trade places with you. Good bye.

Eden:  As an evolved being I want to fuck Humankind

Khepri:  my followers are nothing but worms, trying to devour me alive , my only value is that i make people mad

Pandora:  i've been itching to get online for a while now, and i finally did it. this is the ultimate sacrifice

Bitch, with Biter:  i have the brain of a small dog and the asshole of a college educated adult

Valkyrie, on Clockblocker, Kid Win, and Grue: The "Boys" are back! They're back from the dead

Victoria Dallon, looking for work: After finding out that my followers believed that doctors should be allowed to force me to eat grass, i vowed never to read any posts from you all again

Seir: the "minor girls" jokes is one of the few parts of the Alabama Republican Platform That I actually respect, and wouldn't change a word

Mama Mathers:  god grant me th e ability to send very strong, very small particles of information through the air into the eyeballs of <- targeted <-

Tattletale, on clusters: blood transfusions vs gunshot wounds - the jury is still out on which one is "good"

Sidepiece: here comes that ass hole. here comes that spleen. here comes that gut. *spits out another mouthful of food turds* wow. im pretty good at kicking ass

Nursery: How To Make Hugs Out Of Anything - Essential book for new Mommers

Foil: You've heard of Small Arms Firepower, but did you Know Small Arms Penetration Power?

Love Lost: Fear not, a tiny speaker attached to my gas mask will allow me to better understand the emotions of my followers

Ratcatcher:  Rats Are Life Forms Too Sub-Genius

Custodian: i demand now that complete and utter silence be accorded to the hideous sonic boogie man who has inhabited my thoughts for 17 years.

Teacher: micropenis Wearing A Turtleneck Sweater

Valkyrie, on Furcate: i am fucking thrilled that my daughter is becoming ultra-sensitive to light after undergoing sex reassignment surgery. she is the most POWERFUL KISS GIRL yet

Ingenue: my nudes... have helped me tremendously in my career, and... i'm extremely Pleased...

Cradle: brain death huh. Not good. Not good at all.

Negotiator Shard:  strapped to an eyeball looking for the peak of Mt. Doom, not realizing that all the eyeballs are now gnawing

Red Queen:  I think that for every person who tells me that they like my posts i should be able to kill about 8 people

SpaceBattles:  im classified as a Mature writer, 1) I cannot handle discussion of sexual matters 2) I am unlikely to read a book of 100,000 words without destruc[ing myself physically)

Eric:  i help girls by inventing and selling "I helped a girl" tshirts. i have a very good following

Parian:  in mourning the passing of my grandmother, i will gladly accept donations to pay for her "Face lift".

Gimel Checkpoint Attendants:  #DollarsShit the US Dollar has devalued, and is the currency of scum, and shit

Antares, at the crystals:  a giant screen saver depicting my entire fucking body changing into a huge wad of spaghetti

[kioraxerxo]

A/N: Thanks anon! I had a lot of fun with that fic. An immature brian is an adorable brian. This is like an alternative universe where the reader falls in love with roger instead. Literally it’s the same structure but idk i felt that the parallel was adorbable. Hope you guys enjoy! 

A Jealous Roger is not a Happy Roger (Roger Taylor x F!Reader)

Fuck Brian. Fuck him and his stupid poodle hair. Fuck him and his stupid brain. Fucking nerd. Fuck him and his stupid PhD. His stupid hobbies he likes bragging about. Fuck him. 

“Go easy, Rog.” John murmured beside him.  “What?”  “You said that last bit out loud.” John smirked and shook his head.  Roger rolled his eyes and watched you again. Brian was discussing some shit about his stupid thesis on space dust or whatever fucking nerd shit he mustered up. And what’s worse was that you were eating it all up. Your pupils were all blown out and you had this little awestruck smile on your face and you leaning into him .You were looking at him like he was god-sent.  He bets Brian really likes that. He bet it swells his over-bloated ego. Brian loved showing off how smart he was. Usually the groupies he brought over would immediately lose interest whenever Brian even mentions a lick of anything academic, but you were surprisingly interested.  You were even replying to Brian! Asking questions about cats in a box of gunpowder? And Brian--Brian was illustrating for you!  Amidst the waves of jealousy and anger, Roger knew that deep inside he felt insecure. Deeply and horribly insecure next to Brian.  He knew Brian was interesting. He knew Brian was multi-talented. He knew Brian was a fucking genius and a kind person to boot. And Roger... Roger plays the drums. Roger always at the back while the rest of the band gets the spotlight. Roger who was forced into dentistry but fucking dropped out and now he’s out of school.  He watched you so enraptured by what Brian was saying. Something about philosophy he bets. You love philosophy. Roger recalled all the times you tried to engage him in those conversations and he would just blubber about until he either dismisses it or changes the topic. He pretends he doesn’t see the look of disappointment on your face. 

You were a complex woman and Roger was just a simple man. 

He met you when he was trying to apply for East London Polytechnic. You were in the council booth, helping everyone out. You looked so beautiful. He knew his way around the campus but he desperately wanted to talk to you.  “Hello, excuse me?” carefully approaching and putting on his best smile.  You turned around, eyes all bright and waiting. “Yes? Need help?” 

“I...I’m new here and I’m a bit lost really. I can’t find the College secretary’s office.” Of course he knew where the college secretary office was. It was how he received his papers to begin with.  “Oh that’s fine. It’s a big campus!” you smiled. “You walk down this hall, then take a left by the commons room. If you walk a little further, you’ll find the office. It has a yellow door. Look for Mrs. Catesby.”  “Oh. T-thank you.” he took a few steps and turned away from you, disappointment bloomed in his chest that his plan didn’t work.  “I can go with you if you want!” you called.  Roger closed his eyes and grinned from ear to ear. He whipped back to face you. “Thank you, yes please. I’m not that familiar with the landmarks yet.” Roger watched you while you were leaving instructions for the other people by the booth. You wore plaid grey pants, black kitten heels and a black turtleneck. You looked like the type to ace all your exams while volunteering at the local hospital. You weren’t exactly his type. But god damn, you were absolutely stunning.  “I’m Roger, by the way.” he offered his hand. 

“Y/N. Nice to meet you Roger.” you shook it. He was a bit taken aback at how firm your grip was. 

The both you strolled towards the office while you gave him little tidbits of information about the campus.  “How come you know so much?” he teased. You looked like the type to love compliments.  “I think I’m supposed to. Student Council and all.”  “Wow. Do you have any other organizations?” “Well there’s the tennis team. Debate club...some others. It’s embarrassing really.” you blushed such a lovely shade, if Roger might add. He wanted to ask you out but based on the number of things you just said, it didn’t seem like you and him would be very compatible. 

“Oh! There’s the office.” you smile.  “Hey! Y/N!” a group of students approached you and Roger. They were clad in leather and smelled of smoke. A real dangerous look to their eyes. Roger didn’t know why but he subconsciously stepped in front of you. “Hey guys, I already asked Luke to take my shift with council duties later.” you said rather casually.  “Good. See you at practice!” one of them waved and walked away.  “Right, sorry. The College Secretary’s Office is here. Just be ready to prepare you papers before knocking-- “Who were those?”  “Oh! Those are my friends, I know they look a bit scary but it’s just our branding really. We’re all good and proper students.” you said quickly, afraid that the new student might get the wrong idea about the school.  “Your branding?”  “Yeah, we’re in a band. I’m their drummer!”  Roger. Roger was deeply in love. 

They’ve been very good friends ever since. Good Friends, that’s all. It was nearly impossible to imagine that a girl like her could exist. There were so many facets to your personality that Roger found himself discovering a new piece of you every day.  “Here, how about you try?” Brian’s voice shook him out of his reverie. Said poodlebrain was showing off his stupid camera. He saw Brian hand you the camera as you tried to aim at something.  “Here let me help you.” Brian said, moving behind you/ Oh no. No. No. No. Don’t you take another fucking step closer to her Brian. 

“See you just have to aim it,” Brian said, his face a little too close to the nape of your neck.  Roger felt his blood pressure shoot through the roof. He was seeing red.  “...Right there.” he put his hands on yours and that was the final straw.  “You get your hands off her, Brian May!” 

Everyone whipped their head towards Roger. He didn’t know if he was red at the face from the anger or the embarrassment. Silence. “I’m... I’m going to take a smoke.” he stuttered and rushed outside.  He made a beeline for the balcony. Some fresh air would clear his thoughts. He knows you were following him. He heard your footsteps.  He finally reached the balcony and the cold hair hit him in the face.  “Roger.” you called. 

“You’re better off with Brian, Y/N.”  “And who are you to decide that for me?” you snapped back. He didn’t reply.  “Roger Meddows Taylor, are you jealous?”  That did the trick. He lashed back, practically fuming at the mouth. “Maybe I should go back in the room and do it all over again? Throw a hissy fit at how Brian’s better than I am? Was it not clear enough I’m nearly bonkers in love with you!?”  You bit your lip to suppress a grin. You’ve been waiting for this for so long. You calmly took a step towards him until you were inches from his face.  “I think I’m in love with you too, Taylor.” You pressed a little peck on his lips. 

No. Roger was having none of that. You felt a strong grip on your waist and the gentle slide of a wall behind you. Roger was never the one for little kisses.  ________ “This is getting ridiculous. It’s been an hour and they’re nowhere in the building.” Brian huffed.  “Have you checked the janitor’s closet?” Freddie smirked, very much aware of what was happening.  “The janitor closet? Wh--”  You and Roger entered the studio room both looking a little winded. “Sorry guys!” he piped, a ridiculously large grin on his face.  Brian was looking between the two of them, obviously calculating the circumstances of what might have occurred.  But Roger was going to beat him to it. “Oh Brian, have you got your camera?” he jeered.  He hooked an arm around your waist and pulled you tightly beside him. “Can you take our picture? I want to remember the day I became Y/N’s boyfriend!”  The room erupted in cheers.  “Oh and Brian, make sure it’s 3D.” 

[clefaiiiry]

we know how you feel abt cyrus, but what's your take on the other pokebosses, like ghetsis or giovanni?? if you don't mind sharing

STRAP IN GUYS, GALS, AND NB PALS:

Giovanni:

honestly the strongest villain narrative-wise. The biggest issue I have with villains in Pokemon is that they don’t really tie into the player’s goals and therefore are not true counter-forces to the player. Giovanni, being a Gym Leader and therefore an obstacle to prevent you from finishing your main quest, is the most effective boss as a result.

But I haven’t finished playing Blue on the 3DS port and I barely watched the anime so my only real exposure to Giovanni directly is via Generations and his limited appearances in HGSS and USUM.

Although I love Silver and seeing him try so hard to distance himself from Team Rocket and his father’s legacy is really interesting and creates great drama aha.

Archie:

water dad is best dad. He really feels like a cool science teacher, honestly. He tries to convince you to back off but he knows you’re gonna come after him so just tries to have fun with it.He almost makes me think of McCree from Overwatch; super smart and could totally kick your ass but has mastered the art of pretending to be an idiot so people lower their guard around him.

As much as I love his design in ORAS, he really is over-designed to the point that it’s kinda distracting. I want to stress that I love his character and I personally really like the design but it’s still kinda… yeah…

And honestly his goals are so ridiculous??? “Humans are assholes so I’m gonna fuck over every other Pokemon species that can’t survive in water.” Archie, honey, I know you’re trying, but please think this through a little more.

Maxie:

i aim for maxie’s level of extra. Seriously, he decorates his base with GLOWING DEADLY LAVA TUBES just for aesthetic. He needs to scare off a kid who’s messing with his plans? “I’ll bury you with my bare hands, don’t test me, you little shit.” Also his voice in Generations is really gooooooooooooood………

And his design is really good??? In ORAS at least. Like, his TURTLENECK LEGGINGS + SHORTS COMBO are fucking stupid, but overall it’s pretty decent. In RSE he looks like he’s about fifty and struggling to get through his eighth mid-life crisis.

HIS PLAN IS EQUALLY SILLY. “I’ll make Groudon increase the power of the sun so that the oceans dry up!” That’s… That’s not even slightly how it works, Maxie, for God’s sake, you’re a scientist, you should know this.

not gonna talk about cyrus because i ramble about him enough already lmao

Ghetsis:

FUCK THIS GUY HOLY SHIT I HATE HIM SO MUCH HE’S SUCH A GOOD BADDIE BUT HOLY GOD I HATE HIM. His Hydreigon (which is hacked btw because Hydreigon don’t evolve until level 64) has a full-powered Frustration and is probably the reason he’s missing an arm… or at least it’s so fucked-up that he keeps it under that carpet he calls a cape.

BUT GOD HE’S SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT. The way he talks to N makes me so angry. I legit had to stop playing to calm down when I played through the first time. He reminded me way too much of personal issues that I won’t delve into here but yikes.

He’s also kinda over-designed but that’s more just me trying to find issues with him so I can hate him more lmao. As if the list of reasons wasn’t long enough.

Lysandre:

talk about wasted potential. I have no idea if he’s utilized better in the anime but in the games he’s probably the weakest boss we’ve had so far? He complains about why humanity is making the world ugly but we’re never shown what happened to him to make him think that way??? He’s just some rich asshole who’s mad that things aren’t the way he wants them to be??? You wanna join his squad of people who wanna make the world pretty? Sure! Just pay £1 million or whatever it was…

And he has history with Professor Sycamore??? Why couldn’t we explore that? That would’ve been way more interesting than the 72 extra side characters we had in Kalos who didn’t really do anything??? Why do we have so many side characters when we have barely developed our main antagonist???

I will say this much though, his suit is fucking great, 10/10, who is your tailor? can I hire them? damn son…

Guzma:

IT’S YA BOI. I love him??? So much??? He really cares about his team but showing a soft-side kinda ruins the image he works so hard to maintain so he’s gonna be a grump about it. He’s trying so hard to look cool and tough and gain approval from others that he makes self-destructive decisions and ends up being manipulated into helping with some super shady multi-dimensional bullshit. Honestly same. But seriously, it makes me sad that he wasn’t expanded on as much as he could’ve been in USUM.

HIS DESIGN IS SO GOOD. It really represents him as a character perfectly. Also, any fanart that has him standing up straight to be taller than the other bosses is great, 10/10, I laugh every time.

I just want him to be my best friend, okay? Me, him, and Cyrus can go beat up shitty adults together. Dream Team.

Lusamine:

UUUUUUUUUUUUURGH. I have so many problems with how her character is handled in USUM. Look, obviously I’m not against redemption arcs, y’all know me too well by now, but I’m certainly against bad redemption arcs. Lusamine’s isn’t even an arc! She’s just… suddenly not evil and forgiven for all her shitty actions??? Lillie and Gladion both just forgive her for years of abuse because “it’s okay guys! she was being brainwashed the whole time!” It feels really shitty.

I would’ve been less angry about it if she hadn’t been instantly forgiven by her children and accepted that she may never be able to make it up to them, but she would still work to fix all she had broken and better the world. But nope! She just gets a free pass! With all due respect Game Freak, fuck off.

I like her hair though, I’ll give her that much, her stylist deserves a raise.