#stray kidz fanfic

[chanyouchan]

⌕ jambo em: pequenique na vó jubiscreude, frutetes

⚠ em caso de inspiração, me credite.

📆 03/08/24 | ✎ @mnini (psd)

[fics-lovebot]

my absolute fav thing about stanning a new boy group is that i KNOWWW for a fact the fanfics are going to slap

watch me be on tumblr 24/7 for at least a whole week reading every fic posted since debut ong

[kvnyin]

Spare Me, Love

Pairing: Lee Know x M!Reader

Words: Just a quick something :)

R18+?: Semi, Minors DNI

—

“Your hands are cold.”

“Why are you telling me the obvious?”

“Maybe you couldn’t feel them?”

Minho sighed and gently slipped his hand out of yours to which you immediately caught and put back.

He turned to the side to hide a small smile, it’s always been the small things for him.

“Look at your small hands, they lock perfectly with mine who woulda thought. Aren’t you happy that your hands are warm now?”

“Be quiet your disturbing the water.”

You blankly stared at the back of his head with his gaze fixated on the faucet.

Right.

You guys were bathing and discussing what goes on with life when your souls are apart.

It’s rare nowadays to have him so close and pure like this, most days he’s too exhausted to bathe and often falls asleep on the edge of the bed.

Minho had been gone for a couple of months due to promotion, of course it was lonely but what can you do?

You love him to death, your heart yearns for him when he leaves but it also understands that he’ll return when he can.

You knew it would be difficult to be consistent with him and his schedule but love conquers all.

Thinking about Minho’s hard days at work, you were suddenly hit with overwhelming affection for the smaller male.

With no hesitation you let the words you were thinking slip out.

“I wish you realized how beautiful and loved you are.”

Minho quickly whips his head back to face you, his mouth slightly agape.

“Do you have a death wish?”

Your look of confusion quickly bubbled to a laughing fit, Minho didn’t look an ounce pleased with you but little did he know these were one of many traits that you absolutely adored about him.

“You gonna love me to death?”

“The only thing you’re gonna love is the cold hard ground.”

Your eyes softened the more you stared at the petite male, the man in-front of you has completely flipped your world inside out and made you his loyal accomplice.

“Has anyone told you that you have pretty kissable lips Minnie?”

“Yes.”

You instantly frowned at his response and now it was his turn to laugh at your expressions, you looked away and sighed.

He rolled his eyes and quickly landed a peck on your lips.

“Though you’re the only one who can actually get a taste.”

To say you were swooned right then and there was an understatement.

You were in love.

The way he easily makes your heart thump with just simple gestures.

How he picks on you but immediately makes it up with a small kiss on the temple.

He’ll go on and on about the dish you want to eat and says it’s a waste of time but yet you’ll come home to it ready on your guy’s dinner table.

Whenever you guys get into a disagreement, he’ll approach you a couple hours later with all three cats and claim they missed you, not him.

How could you not fall for Lee Min Ho?

And here you are, dating him for an on-going three years and more.

Maybe it was destined that the black cat Minho was bound to meet you, the radiating golden retriever.

With that thought concluded, you leaned in and sealed the mist between his lips and yours.

He’ll be shy at first and freeze but eventually his hands grasp themselves on your bare chest, deepening the kiss to taste the sweet bit of you more.

Your hand travels down to his thighs, giving them a squeeze signaling that he’s not going anywhere anytime soon.

Breathless, you guys part with a string of saliva and flushed faces.

You immediately dove for his neck, smothering it in millions of loving, hungry and sweet suckles.

His pants and pleads are setting off every switch in your body, it’s almost scary how hungry you are for a taste of him.

Minho can sense that you’re done with the foreplay and when your lidded eyes meet his to ask he answers by positioning himself on your lap.

The once flushed and pleading male is now on-top of you with a devious smirk.

Tonight’s going to be long.

“Spare me, love.”

—

a/n: heyyooo!! it’s been a while since i’ve last updated AND seen you guys. How was everyone been?? I missed all of you and welcome to the new comers! To celebrate my return i decided to write a little treat for Lee Know stans, and to of course update for y’all again. It’s my first time making something suggestive so if it seems unrealistic or just plain out dumb i’m sorry they’ll be better in the future!!

[awrkive]

𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐅𝐋𝐄𝐔𝐑'𝐒 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐇𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐏 !

where i take commissions for any of your graphic design requests. read more to see further details.

━━ 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐒

for fic banners

for headers

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 :: you can look thru my portfolio at @awrkives . i also take commissions for groups besides bts.

━━ 𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐏𝐀𝐘𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 :: (the additional rates are for paypal fees. pls note the additional info with an "¹" and "²" indicators)

• (1) fic banner + simple line breaker ━━ $8 + $1

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to commission a fic banner, just fill out this form (bolded words are must needed information, otherwise, they are optional) :

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[breezybangtanbebe]

❤️🥹 shout out to my fellow black writers on here!

[sizzlingpatrolfox]

looking back, my experience in this fandom was mostly based on shipping jikook, reading conspiracy theory blogs, and mostly watching their moments, all of that was first for me, and BTS as a whole was secondary. I could say that jikook always kept me in this fandom, and I was waiting for concerts or other content with their "moments". I think that bts' popularity is partly based on the shipping community, just the fact that I knew bts members from wattpad fanfics long long before I joined the fandom

Yeah, that's something that just happens in kpop. 70% of the kpop experience is the content that's not related to music. There are so many groups that would sell only a couple of thousands albums if they were as inactive as Jimin... but I wholeheartedly believe that they sell that much because of their "close relationship" to fans.

The more time passes, the more of these groups exist. I genuinely can't believe anyone listens to stray kidz or NCT and enjoys it😭 but that's another topic. I'm sorry if anyone reading is a fan, but I just can't. They don't really perform well on charts, but still loyal fans will buy millions of their albums just to "support" them, and collect pretty pictures. It's not really about the music, and almost everything is about the fans liking the idols as people or entertainers, more than musicians.

Part of BTS popularity is definitely thanks to ships, and to the "ot7" agenda. The same as it is for literally every other kpop group on earth. After BTS blew up after winning their first bbma social award, they doubled down on the "we're a family we're so close" stuff. I'm not saying it was fake, but it was also a tool. The way two famous people dating will mean pr moves for both of them in spite of how genuine their love might be, BTS started putting their relationship as a group on the forefront of what being BTS meant, and it was also a pr move.

Bighit made a survey for fans in late 2017.

It was a study market but most of the questions weren't about music. There were a couple that were something like "what do you like about BTS" and relationship between members was one of the options.

I don't know if you were around, but here's a link where you can see the questions, since I can't find screenshots of the survey itself.

A moment that stuck with me was in 2018 when news said that Jungkook had bought his own apartment. Before that, there had been news about Jin, Yoongi, Hoseok and Taehyung buying their own places. Silence from the company. But when JK bought trimage, bighit immediately issued an statement denying it. Even though Jungkook did have his own place there 😭 but him being the youngest was sort of the glue that was supposed to keep the family together. Half of BTS lore is how Jungkook was raised by all the other six members. He couldn't possibly be independent.

A lot of that obviously goes under the radar because BTS music is actually good, or at least they had some outstanding stuff.

The 2020 - 2022 period was particularly "worse" in that sense... All there was to be enjoy was ships, and the members interactions or their "relationship" with fans. The music was bad, no tour, no performances in general, and the behind the scenes content was lacking too. The whole "we didn't want to do solo songs we wanted to sing all together 🫶" they pulled for their last concerts.. it was all about the same narrative of "being together". The LA and Las Vegas concerts were a whole other level of fanservice.

[sunfoxny]

I have a google slides with my friends full of aus and matz by ITSELF has 7 slides full of fanfics

We have other groups like seventeen, bts, txt and stray kidz but ateez is dominating the slides rn

[x-woozi]

Sugar, Spice, and Everything.. else?

Female Reader x Stray Kids

Genre: College au, social media/text au, fluff-ish, maybe a little crack

Summary: After a very public embarrassing moment, y/n manages to make a few new friends. Though in trying to make those friends there is a bit of a complication in winning over the group.

A/n: This is my first social media au, I always enjoy reading these and I thought that I’d finally try and make one myself. There will also be some written parts as well.

Start date: August 27, 2020

End date: October 26, 2020

Updates: Thursdays, Saturdays and Mondays at 5:30 CST

Profiles

Part 1 : A video?!

Part 2: Brownies!

Part 3: Replaced

Part 4: Next victim

Part 5: A plan?

Part 6: on a mission

Part 7: acceptance

Part 8: it’s a mess

Part 9: Friday night

Part 10: jokes

Part 11: A BEAST?!

Part 12: one tough cookie

Part 13: freedom

Part 14: a favor

Part 15: Racha inc.

Part 16: an accident

Part 17: Family Dinner

Part 18: bro zoned

Part 19: I’ll handle it

Part 20: a skirt.

Part 21: after..

Part 22: cuddles

Part 23: time bomb

Part 24: rumors

Part 25: waiting

Part 26: are you alive?!?

Part 27: confessions

Part 28: ‘my scary emo boy’

[arkive78]

BRUH IM WEAK THIS IS TOO GOOD

how to tame a prince | seo changbin

genre: dragon prince!changbin x fem researcher!reader | fantasy/royal au ; enemies-to-lovers ; swearing summary: you travel the world collecting data so you could write your thesis on your favorite creatures - dragons. at the last leg of your journey, you accidentally fall asleep in a dragon’s cave owned by a nearby kingdom and are kidnapped by their prince, seo changbin. after getting permission to study there from the king, changbin refuses to leave you alone with his precious dragons and you develop an unlikely relationship. wc: 11.6k

Your very first memory as a wee little kid was when you were waiting impatiently in bed for one of your parents to come and read you a bedtime story. Your library was filled with infinite amounts of educational, but kid-friendly books just for you. Your father was the one who filled bookcases upon bookcases of those books because he knew the second you were born that your mind craved infinite knowledge. And he was right! You loved reading the shelves in your name because they held words that your school was too afraid to say. In fact, you got in trouble a lot simply because you said those words.

Witches, trolls, spirits, goblins, ghouls, magic, you name it, you read it, you said it and the school was not very happy with neither you nor your parents. But that’s ok, because your parents didn’t care for what the stuck up old hags said, anyways. They weren’t going to be those parents who hid their child from the vast unknowns of the world because they were trying to ‘protect’ you - they wanted to show you the unknowns. They’d take the scolding for as long as they can - as long as that little fire that burned for knowledge was still lit in your heart, then they had nothing to worry about.

No one expected any less from the famous apothecary family.

Keep reading

[arkive78]

SKZ Fanfics/Headcanons to swoon over

When you click the links make sure to read the content warnings!!!

Headcanons

Breaking up with you but regretting it eventually by @stayswriting

SKZ on the morning after your first time together (maknae line) by @stayswriting 

SKZ on the morning after your first time together (hyung line) by @stayswriting 

SKZ as your first boyfriends by @hwajin 

First times with SKZ (18+) by @hynjnhwng 

When would skz f**k you senseless (hyung line version) by @lixhues 

Moments they realized they were in love with you by @myjisung 

how they would comfort you by @myjisung 

dating stray kids by @aemoonie 

bang chan ideal type by @hanjifuck 

Kisses with Felix by @myjisung 

Kisses with Hyunjin by @myjisung 

Kisses with Bang Chan by @myjisung 

sitting on their lap while they’re gaming by @cosmic-railwayxo 

stray kids as: different ways they show their love (hyung line) by @chanslovebug 

how they act after an argument and how they would make it up to you by @myjisung 

things best friends don’t do by @cosmic-railwayxo 

kissing them for a challenge by @cosmic-railwayxo 

sleeping on the couch after an argument by @minlustre 

when you aren’t dating but aren’t just friends either by @cosmic-railwayxo 

boyfriend things skz does by @minlustre 

An absolute amazing fic you need to read is the Stray Hybrids fanfic by @ / HoratioK on Ao3 !! They have it in 3 different sets of pronouns: she/her, he/him, and they/them. It’s quite a read and it’s really well-done for the AU it’s insane. 

[chanyouchan]

⌕ isto não é um clichê sobre basquete, feat. @xmaeve

⚠ em caso de inspiração, me credite.

📆 22/12/23 | ✎ @mnini (psd)

[stargaz3rlily]

~ Candy shop confessions ~

Main characters ~ Pt 1

Dami rose AKA Taehyuns crush and main leading lady

And her close group of friends

Ebony Tate ~ basically her second sister girlfriend of lee Felix

Bang Chan ~ The brains of the friend group

Carmen sandiego ~ Dami’s manger/ friend

Amaris Grimmr ~ Dami’s unofficial mom

Raven Rose ~ Dami’s little big sister

Marcus Locwell ~ Designated driver to almost everyone, greatly loved and appreciated. 

[mymoonmin]

“You are my carol” - HYUNSUNG 
Fandom: Stray Kids 
 Chapters: 1/1


Pairing: Han Jisung / Hwang Hyunjin


Genre: Canon Compliant, Friends To Lovers, Fluff


Rating: General Audiences


Summary: “Jisung is Hyunjin’s Secret Santa for this year, and he takes the chance to make Hyunjin more than just a gift...” My Twitter: @ MyMoonMin 
LINK TO THE FIC ON AO3

[kvnyin]

Strangely, In That Moment. . I Still Felt Cold.

Pairing: Felix X M!Reader

Wording: a lot

Genre: Angst Sorta? I think more sad, v sad i dunno

TW: homophobia, internalized homophobia, slight implications of depression and anxiety

song to go with it cause yea: sad

A/N: This bad boy is LONG LONG but i worked rlly hard on it so pls read it throughly loves! If you know where the title is from I love you <3

ps; I no longer have an editor and I suck at grammar, proper wording and correct punctuation sometimes so please bare with me T__T

-------

“Don’t leave.”

“I’m sorry, we’ll meet again I promise.”

“How can you guarantee that?”

“I can’t.”

-------

You woke up to the sun in your eyes, it stung as you focused on the bright orb shining through the window, snow was falling gently outside, coating your town in a blanket of white. After ruffling your hair around and pulling your disorientated shirt down, you got out of bed with a heavy mind.

That stupid dream came up again.

You stood in the middle of your room, your mind was roaming for answers. Blankly looking out of the snow covered window, you heaved a shaky breathe and got dressed for the day.

----

December 5, 2016

It was a really cold day, it was snowing quite a lot. You buried your face in Felix’s scarf, waiting at the usual spot, the Royal Botanic Garden, couples littered the snowy park.

You rocked back and fourth on your feet, checking your phone periodically waiting for a new message, Felix had asked you to meet him suddenly, you didn’t mind though. Ever since winter break happened you haven’t been out as much, this felt nice.

You stood in the cold for what felt like forever, hugging yourself to keep the warmth from seeping out anymore then it already has, looking down to stare at your redden hands.

‘I should’ve brought gloves’

Mid-way through your thought, you felt something warm against your cheek. Slowly turning around to face whatever it was, a peek of blonde caught your eye.

“Felix where have you been? I feel like I’m going to turn into a popsicle.”

You let out a laugh after seeing his face, a line of hot cocoa resting on his top lip.

“How’s my mustache? Took me a while to grow ya know!”

He cracked a goofy smile, handing you the other cup of hot cocoa. You carefully sipped the sweet liquid, it burned your tongue a little but it did help you warm up a bit.

“Why did you call me out today with no explanation?”

“I wanted to hang out with my cute puppy duh.”

“Felix I’m not a dog, we’ve been over this.”

“Aw come on, you’re too serious for your own good. I called you to come shopping with me!”

“Shopping? Why can’t you just do that by yourself?’

“You’re no fun. Besides you came all this way, might as-well tag along with me!”

You rolled your eyes playfully at Felix, but complied with his little request. The rest of the day went by quicker than you expected, time always seemed to pass by faster whenever you were with Felix, no matter the place, it never felt like enough. 

You guys went to a bunch of stores, bought things, tried clothes on, and made fun of mannequins. Walking out one of the many stores, something had caught Felix’s eye.

“Hey! Look it’s the new ice-cream shop, we need to go in come on!”

“Felix my wallet is crying right now, I can’t-”

“It’s on me!”

He grabbed your hand, and your heart fluttered. He’s done this ever since elementary school but it always manages to make you go wide-eyed while filling your stomach with butterflies. No matter what your face always flared red. Reluctantly following him into the cute ice-cream shop, you could feel your heart beating out of your ears and chest, that your breathing is heavy with a mix of wandering eyes. 

Over the years, you’ve become attached to Felix. He was the one who could touch you and not make you uncomfortable, the one you could laugh your heart out with, the only one you would show your tears to. You would think over the course of more than 10 years, you would’ve told him everything and anything but the fact is, you’ve been hiding one.

It’s difficult to comprehend really, it’s not like you’re ashamed of who you are. No matter how much Felix meant to you, you would never let him decide what kind of person you became. 

Though the reason why you’re scared of what’s inside your heart is because it’s forbidden. 

We’ve all been taught, or have heard from someone at some place, that loving the same gender as your own is nothing but trouble and disgusting.

That no matter how much you connect with a person, no matter how much you pour sunflowers into their heart, society will never fully accept you as one.

And that’s scary.

Felix never really spoke about anything relating to the LGBTQ+ community, and if you guys had happen to walk past a gay couple all he would do is look ahead, his expression still the same, as-well as his body language; swift and gentle; content.

Though it was a different story when it came to speaking on the topic, you’ve tried to confess to him, drops hints and even went as far as telling his mom. Though before you could finish your confessions the moment Felix heard the word “homosexuality” he would tense at his shoulders, look away in irritation and tell you were being insensitive for bringing it up when it wasn’t your place to. 

You shook your head slightly to get rid of the bad thoughts. You were out right now with Felix, you shouldn’t be thinking this way during such a good time. Peeking at Felix, he was grinning ear to ear with little worry in his eyes and beaming with so much light you couldn’t help but let your heart pound loudly.

You have to tell him, one way or another. 

“What flavor are you getting? I was planning on getting-”

“Mm, Chocolate.”

You both muttered at the same time.

“You read my mind! Oh my god. . . are you a wizard?”

“Felix, we’ve been friends for more than 10 years. We’ve also have gotten the same ice-cream flavor for more than 10 years.”

“It doesn’t hurt to be surprised!”

You both laughed at each other’s comment and proceeded to find a seat. Eventually Felix laid his eye’s on a little booth by the window, with your hand still interlocked with his.

 It was crowded and busy, so of course two boys holding hands caused unwanted attention.

You could see Felix tense at the stares, he quickly let go of your hand and shoved his hand into his hoodie pocket. You felt your heart sink by the lost of contact but still acted as if it didn’t bother you, you had to or else nasty comments would start flooding in if you didn’t.

Sitting down, the tension was gone. By the time you turned to look at Felix, the guy already downed three spoonfuls of his ice-cream, of course you laughed at him while he gave you the 'lost puppy' look.

Then, he cracked the prettiest smile, his eye’s locked with yours.

God if he wasn’t pretty enough, he was even prettier with his golden brown eye’s glowing from the sunlight, his freckles littering his face like the stars alined and that flushed pink blush spreading across his nose. 

Without thinking, you leaned in. Your mind was so clouded you didn’t hear Felix screaming at you, not until you felt two hands grasp at your shoulders tightly. 

“What the fuck are you doing?”

You sobered up quite quickly after seeing Felix’s face.

He’s never cussed at you before.

And he’s never had such a disgusting look on his face.

Shocked turned into anger in a matter of seconds, you roughly shook off Felix’s hands. 

“What am I doing? What the fuck am I doing? I like you. God fucking damnit I like you! Never once have you ever considered that have you? I feel like an idiot liking you because you’re all about this ‘we’re only friends’ bullshit!”

Felix immediately back-offed of you, his expression was sunken and grim. 

By the time you were done yelling, the whole shop was looking at the both of you, whispers filled the air.

“They’re gay?”

“Oh my god are they dating?”

“What a disappointment.”

“I hope my son never turns out that way, disgusting young boys they are.”

Your eye’s started wandering, scanning the shop. Every eye was on you, and every single word was aimed at you, panic started to set in.

You were so focused on the stares that you hadn’t noticed Felix running out of the shop until you turned your gaze back to him and he was gone.

You sprinted out of the shop, searching every-where for Felix. You ran as fast as you could, tripping over your shoes and every little rock, calling out his name repeatedly over and over again.

You never found him in the span of the hour you searched.

It was already dark out by the time you stopped running, your legs were sore and bruised. You knew he went home, but you hoped he would appear in-front of you, telling you that it was alright to feel like you did, but of course he didn’t.

You fell to your knees in the empty park, snow was falling down on top of your head and shoulders. 

You never cried whenever inconveniences happened, and god forbid you to cry in a public area.

You can’t recount the last time you cried, was it weeks ago? Months ago?

It didn’t matter when because you could feel warm tears running down your face. Tears turned into sobs, your hiccups echoed around the park, at that moment you didn’t care if people heard you. 

The only thing racing through your mind was Felix, if you had known he would react this way you would’ve never uttered a single word.

You ripped off the scarf, looking down at it with tears in your eyes. 

And that’s all you did for hours, on the ground in the bitter cold while snow gently fell onto you.

Holding onto Felix’s scarf, you finally mustered the courage to face the world again and trudged home.

It wasn’t a surprise when you fell ill, it wasn’t a huge shock either that Felix hadn’t talked to you. You didn’t have the energy to message him, and if he had messaged you, you didn’t have the guts to admit that you lost him just yet. 

You were bed ridden for a week, and not once did Felix come check up on you, not once did he call to ask how you were. To say the least your mother was concerned when Felix didn’t come over to take care of you like he always would.

“Where is he? He usually would be bickering with me about what to cook you!”

Your mother let out a light-hearted laugh, while you pursed your lips. You hadn’t told your mother what had happened that night, Felix was like her second son and if she had known she would never see him again you didn’t know how she would react.

Ironic enough, his house was next door. Thus explaining where your guy’s relationship stood after the incident.

“I don’t know, he’s probably just busy.”

“That boy is wrapped around your finger! You know he would drop everything for you in an instant if he knew you were sick dear. I vividly remember-”

“Can we not talk about this right now please?”

Her smile slightly drooped.

“Honey, listen. Felix won’t be around for much longer. He’s actually mo-”

“Mom, please.”

She gave you a look of worry. You were quite stubborn when it came to topics you didn’t like talking about, nonetheless she respected your decision.

It was no secret to her that you liked Felix. She’s known about your attraction to guys ever since you entered middle school, but never once did she judge you for it or shamed you for being the way you were.

You were one of the lucky few that had supportive parents, who still looked and smiled at you the same. You played with a stray string on your sweater, your mind was blank yet racing at the same time.

Tired of sulking and being inside, you put on some tennis shoes and made your way outside. There was a van parked in-front of Felix’s house, boxes littered the nearby ground while his father was talking to the driver.

You thought it was odd.

‘He’s going on vacation this late into the break? Why are they bringing so much stuff along if there’s only a week left?’

Felix’s father spotted you and waved, motioning you to come over to him. You reluctantly made your way over, politely bowing to avoid verbally saying your greeting.

“Hey! We haven’t heard from you the past the week, are you alright?”

“I was sick due to being in the cold for too long.”

He made the typical ‘why would you something like that’ dad head shake. 

“That doesn’t sound like you at all, Felix didn’t tell us anything that lame brat. I’m glad you recovered well!”

You bitterly smiled at the old man.

‘So this is really it. It’s over. We’re over.’

“Ah! You must be curious to why we have so many boxes right?”

You nodded.

“Man that brat! Well, to answer your question son, we’re currently finishing up packing our things for the move. Felix got accepted into some music program and it requires us to move across the globe, to be honest with you it was last minute and not well planned out but that’s just life.”

You froze in place, you blankly stared at him. You were waiting for an upcoming joke but it never came.

“Did he really not tell you? I swear that guy-”

“Where is he right now?”

You were frantic and in a state of panic.

“Oh, he’s in his room polishing up anything he-”

You didn’t let him finish, sprinting into Felix’s house running up the stairs, you could feel hot tears pooling in your eyes, your lungs burned. You turned the corner and there was Felix, stacking his boxes and luggage with a sorrowful look on his face.

You stood in the blue hallway. 

The hallway that you played in with Felix when you were 7, where you would make paper crowns for him while he would pretend to bake you brownies with brown play-doh.

The hallway you cried in when Felix fell ill with a fever and couldn’t play with you when you were 10.

The same god damn hallway where you fell in love with him when he sang to you on the night you lost your pet dog. He sang so sweetly and soft while the moon shined on him. You truly believed he was some sort of angel that you were destined to meet, an angel whom came to rescue you from anything harmful.

Tears were pouring out the more you thought about the memories you had made with him.

You wouldn’t be able to eat his mom’s cooking anymore. 

You could no longer come over after school to bake sweets in the kitchen, lie on the couch watching cartoons while Felix acted out the moves, run your fingers over his freckles while he slept soundly on your legs, and you could no longer hear him whisper sweet nothings into your ear while he held you close.

You let your emotions take over, angrily stomping to his door.

Felix looked up in surprise, dropping the small cardboard box in his hands.

“What are you doing here-”

“Why did you invite me out that day?”

“Why are you asking me that now?”

“Answer me.”

You pursued your lips while wiping away your tears.

“I just missed you is all-”

“You knew you were moving that week didn’t you.”

He looked down with guilt.

“I couldn’t bring myself to tell you, you just seemed so happy in that moment and I didn’t want to ruin that.”

You scoffed at the blonde, clenching both of your hands.

“So you thought it was a good idea to take me out when your parents were at home packing to travel across the fucking world while I was left to believe I would see you again after break?”

Felix stayed silent, he had no excuse to why he didn’t tell you sooner.

“You don’t care about my feelings Felix. You always do things your way, not once did you ever consider how it would make me feel.”

“I don’t care? For years I was the one who had to sit through all of your sobs storys about all of these stupid guys who treated you like shit, I was the one who ran on my own two fucking feet from our school to this random guy’s house because you were crying. I was the one who missed out on the biggest music event to come take care of you when your shit ex wouldn’t, and you have the audacity to tell me I don’t care?” 

“What the hell does that have to do with any of this Felix.”

He looked at you with anger, his fist was balled up to the point his knuckles turned white. He looked away in frustration before heaving a heavy breathe, he sharply turned back to you.

“I’ve liked you ever since we were kids.”

You stood there awestruck.

“What did you just say?”

Felix was practically steaming at this point, his eyes dead set on yours.

“I’ve liked you ever since were kids. How could I not? We were such a good pair together, one thing lead to another and I just caught feelings alright.”

“You’re lying. You’re only saying all of this because you have a guilty conscious.”

It was like you blinked and you were suddenly in Felix’s arms, his chest was pounding loudly and his breathe was wavering. You tried breaking away but he just wouldn’t budge, you looked up at him and did your heart break.

There he was, embracing you like it was the end of the world while tears rolled down his face. You could tell then he was being sincere with his words, but it still didn’t explain anything. You hugged him back and took in his scent, he smelled of tangerine and mint, your favorite scent in the world.

“I can tell you’re being truthful but it still doesn’t explain why you acted the way you did that day if all of what you’re saying is true.”

You guys maintained eye contact until you asked him that, his gaze slowly shifted to the side and he looked almost guilty. His arms turned loose around you, you broke away from him and just stood there patiently for an answer.

“I’m a guy, and you are too.”

“So? What’s wrong with two guys dating?”

Felix turned to you suddenly, his angry expression reappearing.

“Everything about it is wrong. The world was created so guys would be with girls, it’s morally wrong to even think about you in any other way than a brother.”

You didn’t understand where this was all coming from, love is love?

“Felix what are you trying to say?”

He took a deep breathe.

“You’re fucking disgusting for liking guys and I feel sick to even be thinking about you this way.”

Your ears started to ring, and without a second thought you bolted out of his room. Slamming in between the railing and wall, you clumsily ran down the stairs, his father gave you a strange look and called something out to you, but you were too panicked to even register what he said.

‘He hates me. He thinks i’m disgusting, Felix out of all people thinks i’m disgusting.’

You wiped away the tears with your sleeves, but they just continued to roll down your face. You barged through the front door of your house and headed straight to your room, you slammed the wooden door shut and dropped to your knees hyperventilating.

The one person that you loved, the one you shared many memories and laughs with thinks you’re disgusting. You let out screams that you never thought was possible. Memories kept running through your head and it began to throb painfully.

It was a blur from there, you don’t remember much but another week had passed and still no answer.

One early morning, unbeknownst to you, it was the day Felix was leaving. You woke up late that night, your mom gently knocked on your door with a sad smile.

“Hi there sleepyhead, I’m guessing the goodbye made you sleepy.”

You looked at her confused.

“What goodbye?”

She looked at you and her face dropped.

“Oh honey..”

“What is it? Why do you look so concerned?”

She shook her head gently.

“Felix left not too long ago to catch his flight, I thought you happened to meet him before he left.”

Your eyes widened, you rushed to get out of bed, ran pass your mom and out of your house bare-footed. The cold snow stung at your feet but you didn’t care, you stopped in-front of his house. Your breathe heavy, all of the lights were out and the only thing left was the emptiness of it. You let out a shaky breathe before softly speaking.

“You’re not gone, you wouldn’t leave me like that. I know you wouldn’t.”

Tears started to form again, even though you said it, you weren’t so sure yourself. No one answered back for a while, you don’t know how long you stood there, but it was like time froze and all you could do was move your eyes.

“What are you doing here this late, aren’t you cold? Why are you bare-footed?”

That voice. You whipped your head to the person, and there Felix stood with a concerned look on his face. You didn’t think, you just ran to him and hugged him tight like he was going to disappear any minute.

“My mom’s lying right? You’re not really leaving, if you were you wouldn’t be here right now.”

Felix’s scent scorched at your nose, and it made you cry even harder.

He patted your head, and gave your snow-covered hair a kiss, a sigh leaving his lips.

“My parents are currently parked a couple streets down, we forgot some documents to finalize selling the house. After I pick them up, we’re heading straight to the airport. There’s nothing else I can say but I’m sorry.”

You shrunk, and your legs gave out.

“You’re lying. You’re not moving, not after everything we’ve been through. We made a promise remember? Till death do us part, come on Felix I know you wouldn’t abandon me like this.”

It was silent for a while, or a few seconds. Maybe it felt like a while because you knew no matter what you said, time wouldn’t reverse and you were stuck in the present.

Why do good things always end?

His phone started ringing, he picked it up and his facial expression turned grim.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t have much time left.”

You tried one final time.

“Don’t leave.”

“I’m sorry, we’ll meet again I promise.”

“How can you guarantee that?”

“I can’t.”

He squeezed you tight against him, brushing your bangs out of your face and planted a kiss on your temple before letting you go, and running into his house, he waved one last time before disappearing into the dark house.

You couldn’t bear to see him leave, so you trudged home. There were no more tears to be shed, you aimlessly walked back into your house and sat on the sofa.

You started to shiver, the cold was finally biting at your skin harshly. Your eyelids felt heavy, after awhile you were soundly asleep. There was a gentle knock at the door, your mother quietly went to open it and there stood Felix holding a pink box.

“He ran away before I could give it to him, do you think you could deliver this to him in the morning?”

He let out a small chuckle and handed your mother the small box before his eyes landed on you fast asleep on the sofa.

“Of course. He’s really going to miss you Felix.”

His chuckle subsided and a sad smile appeared.

“And I’m going to miss him just as much.”

Your mother gave him a pat on his shoulder, tears of her own forming.

“Do you mind if I carry him to bed? He wasn’t wearing any shoes when we met earlier and I’m afraid he might catch a cold again.”

“Oh please do, you know I wouldn’t be able to lift him even if I tried, I’ll go put the box in my room for the time being.”

Felix slowly walked towards you, afraid to wake you from your slumber. Swiftly picking you up without any trouble, he purposely took slow steps so the remaining time he had left with you would last a bit longer.

Disappointedly enough, he was placing you down in your bed in no time.

He kneeled by your bed, examining your face one last time.

“I love you, till we meet again.”

Unknown to him, your mother was well on her way upstairs to give him a parting gift when she saw it.

As she stood by your doorframe silently.

Felix leaned down and gave you a tender kiss.

She darted down the stairs before he caught her, a smile arising on her face.

—

You don’t remember how you got into bed but the next morning, your mother came in with a box. She knew you weren’t in the best mood, so she placed it on the end of your bed.

After a bit, you eventually sat up and spotted the pink box.

With all the strength you had left you stretched forward, grabbed the box and placed it onto your lap. There was a letter, and a stuffed animal, carefully picking up the letter, you opened it and bursted out in tears once more.

“Hey there, I honestly don’t know why I’m writing this, but I can’t leave without telling you. I’m a coward for not being able to say this to you last night when you were with me, but by writing it I hope to get my message across. I’ve been in love with you since we were little kids.

Never once did I have a bad time with you, you were always the star that I aimlessly kept trying to catch when in reality I should’ve realized you were already mine.

At first, I denied that I liked you more than a friend. How could I, a male, love another male romantically? It felt morally wrong, and even now it still does. As time progressed, I slowly started to accept that I saw you more than just my best-friend, I wanted to hold you more intimately and I constantly catched myself staring at your lips. The feeling was foreign and scary, but I knew you liked me back, I’ve known about your feelings these past years but I was ignorant and ignored them for my own sake.

I love you. I hope one day when we meet again, I’ll be able to say it with my chest proudly instead of writing it on this paper. I promise to be a better man when we cross paths again, whether it’s in this lifetime or the next, I’ll finally accept who I am and we’ll be able to be happy together, but for now, this is as much as I can give to you.

I had this bear handmade especially just for you, it has one of my bracelet charms on it. Make sure to not lose it, and to take care good care of the bear. When you get lonely and miss me, I hope you can confide in it about your worries and doubts while I’m gone. I was going to give you this when I went into my house but you were gone once I came out, I hugged it once last time. So when you hold it, it’s like you’ll be holding me.

Funny enough.

As I held the warm bear in my arms.

Strangely, in that moment. . I still felt cold.”

[minhothebighoe]

2:03 pm I Love You

Requested: yes: “Hey babes, hope your doing swell❤ What about Felix ( stray kids ) with a self conscious s/o? Like, she just doesn't thing she's good enough for him + so he hard core comforts her. Cuddles her until she gives up type thing. Possibly smut but if you don't write smut for him just fluff is fine.”

Word Count: 3.1 k

Summary: Your relationship with Felix was great at first, but when you two got caught in public it changed your life for the worst.

Warnings: mentions of feeling depressed, mentions of sex, small amounts of smut (just don’t blink), a mention of degradation kink (AGAIN DONT BLINK). And a cute/ sexy Felix

**also I haven’t proofread yet so hope it’s not too bad lololol, also maybe pt. 2 ???***

+

“Babe please tell me what’s wrong”

Felix sighed deeply, before laying a hand on my bare shoulder, gripping tightly at the exposed skin that poked out of my sweater. He looked and concentrated on me with worry and sadness that was clearly displaying on his soft features; his eyes showing nothing but pure and utter remorse. I turned away and stared at the floor silently with pure guilt and anxiety that was building and starting to weigh heavily on my chest. I hated myself for the fact that I was the one causing him to feel this way.

Things have been shitty for a while now, and I’m not talking about Felix or anything about him. Felix is literally the light of my life, and it’s not an understatement when I say I would literally take a bullet for the boy or give up my life to save his. Everything that is wrong is because of me, myself, and I.

Things were more than amazing in the beginning when no one knew of us together. When Felix could visit or hang out we would mostly just Sneak around and hide the fact we were an item. It was definitely hard most times,especially for him; he wanted nothing more than to show me off to the world, but at the same time it was oh so exciting. Even though Felix wanted to come out to the world as more than close friends he also loved concealing our relationship. He being the dirty Aussie boy he is admittedly ached to fuck me in public anywhere that he could get his hands on me, and shit, it was our dirty little secret.

However, things mostly took a toll for the worst when dispatch caught us together, and stays all over found out about the relationship.

It was late at night, Felix and I were at a park close to my home, and me being the dumb ass I am, was not thinking coherently. All I was thinking of was the lovely night me and my beautiful boyfriend were having, and the fact that he was physically there with me. At no time did it occur to me to think that other people would be up at the god awful hour.

In the moment, Felix was chasing me on the open grass field, and we were both happy and content. We didn’t need much more than each other to have a good time or have fun.

“You’ll never catch me!” I laughed, running faster away from my playful boyfriend who was right on my tail. I however, knew for fucking sure he was definitely gonna get me, I just wanted to tease the poor lad and get him all worked up.

Not even 10 seconds later he caught a hold of my hand and before I knew it, we both came to a dead halt. I turned around to face him and capture him at the moment, it almost felt like one of those cheesy kdrama moments where everything is in slow motion. His beautiful dark eyes stared lovingly and deep into my own. His chest was heaving up and down and all I could hear was the sound of his heavy breaths parting from those big beautiful pouty lips. He leaned his forehead onto mine before speaking with that sinful voice of his,

“God you have no idea what the fuck you do to me.”

That beautiful playful smile was now a wicked and sexy smirk, and god did I love it.

He pulled me closer to where my chest was touching his long lean frame; I felt his hands slowly travel and make their way down to my hips, it was almost teasingly unhurried. I felt a soft squeeze on the flesh, and a painful chill make its way up throughout my body. I thought I forgot how to breathe at that very moment.

Meanwhile felix’s eyes had never left mine, causing a certain feeling make its way through out my core deep within. I was aching for him to touch me, and I could tell he couldn’t wait any longer as well.

God you have no idea what you do to me, Felix.

He continued to smirk at me before impulsively bringing his lips down to my neck with such vigor and pure lust. I brought my hands instantly from his chest and placed them at the back of his head running them through and tugging on his sexy red locks. I gasped for air as I felt his teeth nip slightly at my flesh, hitting that sweet spot just right below my earlobe. He slowly proceeded to run his tongue over the bite mark before sucking ever so mercilessly. I could feel the heat rapidly making a pool in my underwear, and I didn’t know how much longer I could wait for him to touch me.

“F-Felix please.” I pleaded.

He detached his lips from my neck, and I could instantly feel a cool breeze attack the spot where his mouth once was.

He stared devilishly at me, his pupils getting blacker, before speaking

“Awe is my baby girl getting impatient…. don’t worry darling I’ll fuck you right.” I gulped; He leaned in again, and I could feel his hot breath hit the inside of my ear causing goosebumps to arise and my complexion go pale.

“I just wanna play with you first.”

I stared at Felix as my mouth went dry and my mind buzzed. His words alone were enough to get me off, and all I wanted was for him to rip my skirt off and fuck me right then and there.

But Then…..that’s when I heard it.

**click**

I snapped out of the trance like state, and forcefully pulled myself away from Felix’s body. I automatically knew exactly what that sound was and it was almost an instant shock of anxiety that rolled throughout my body. I looked over to Felix and I could tell he felt the exact same way.

“C’mon babe we have to go.” Even though he was trying to rush me, he said it as calminglyas possible.

** click **

As we moved quicker away, the more rapid the noise was becoming. Felix and I moved speedily, giving even Usain Bolt a run for his money, trying to get away from the situation. However, we both knew it was too late and the damage was most likely done. We were already caught and red handed at that.

“People are going to find out” I thought, anxiety filled my entire being with the thought. What will they think? This wasn’t no ordinary fan base I was going up against, these are kpop stans the most frightening yet loyal fans to ever exist. They were going to completely and utterly judge me.

and that they did.

-

It had only been 1 month since the pictures had come out of Felix and I embracing each other at the park, and let’s just say the backlash was worse than what I was expecting. Each day was more shoddy than the last, it seemed as each hour passed the more shit I was getting and the more comments filled my Social media telling me I wasn’t good enough, or that I was too ugly, too fat, and so on. At first it didn’t really bother me, I had hoped changing my profiles to private would help, and get people to calm down about the situation, and it did for a while. However me being me, I couldn’t help myself to search and see what the fans were saying,and as much as I wanted to ignore it, I couldn’t fucking do it.

“Ugly bitch, Felix deserves so much better.”

ugh.

“Where the hell did he find her? Probably some whore.”

Woah.

“Fat ugly bitch should lose some weight, she’s going to crush our poor Felix.”

Ow.

“They’ll never last SHE'S just another slut I mean look how short her skirt is in that picture, such a sleeze”

Okay then.

A couple more months had passed and I thought it would die down but for some reason it never did and as the number of comments and articles grew, I felt my deepest insecurities grow as well, drowning out any ounce of confidence I once had.

The fat comments were an especially hard pill to swallow as I had always been insecure about my weight. Even though deep down I knew I wasn’t “fat” I still had trouble looking at a mirror and being happy with the way I looked. And having a boyfriend who is an international heart throb did not make things easier to say the least.

“Why aren’t you eating babe?”

“You‘ve lost some weight love since the last time I saw you, I’m a little concerned”

“Babe please eat something, are you okay?”

Felix had seemed to have asked these questions quite a few times in the past months, and I would always reply with the same short answers along with a fake smile.

“Lixie I’m fine, I promise.”

“I’m just not hungry.”

“Ohh I just ate I’m okay.”

It wasn’t just the fat comments not causing me to eat, it was everything that was sending me into a spiral of self hatred and let’s just say: my very own demise. I had lost all appetite because all I could think of were those millions of fans telling me how ugly and disgusting I was, and, oh yeah, that I should do Felix a favor and just kill myself. And the most annoying thing was, I had no idea why it was even getting to me so much. It just hurt knowing that practically a whole fan base hated you because you loved someone so unconditionally, and you couldn’t do a thing about it or change their mind.

And I started to believe every damn word that was thrown at me.

I was too scared to even leave my home knowing that people knew who I was and how I looked. I didn’t want to risk it. I was scared, point, blank, and period. Sadly, I didn’t have anyone to confide in. I had always been mostly independent and an introvert so friends were very few and far inbetween;I didn’t want to worry my poor parents, as they would be devastated and heartbroken to know their little girl was feeling this broken. And, I couldn’t tell my boyfriend because he was busy most of the time getting ready for a fucking world tour to notice, and there was no way in hell I was going to distract him from that, so me being very discouraged to bring this up to anyone, kept to myself and thought being alone was the best option.

At least that’s what I thought I could do.

I guess I was naive thinking I could hide and push away my own feelings, but every negative thought, moment of regret, and all my insecurities were starting to show and make their way from the dark abyss and pile to the surface. I wanted anything but to worry Felix with my issues, however everything was becoming way too hard to mentally bare and I was reaching above my boiling point.

“Y/N, please for fucks sake talk to me, don’t you understand I’m here for you? Don’t you understand I can tell when something is wrong?”

Felix, who was sitting next to me, quickly got down on his knees in front of me. He placed a hand lovingly on my cheek, softly rubbing soothing circles with the pad of his thumb on the skin, causing me to feel somewhat calm.

I didn’t want to tell him how I was feeling partially because I didn’t know how to explain it. There’s just so much going on inside my head that it feels as if I’m at war with my own consciousness.

“I-I’m fine baby I p-promise I ju-“ tears were threatening to spill and I couldn’t even look him in the eyes.

“Bull fucking shit (y/n). You for the past 8 months have been anything but yourself, you’ve lost so much fuckin weight to the point where you’re skin and bones, you’re not eating, and I- I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, and it fucking hurts to see you like this and I-“ tears streamed down Felix’s face, and he cupped my chin and forced me to look into him.

Everything was accumulating and it was starting to reach a point where hiding these demons was not in the question anymore. Seeing Felix in this much pain because of me, tipped me beyond off the scale and I felt almost angry that all this bullshit had happened. Am I weak for wanting to tell him?

Would he be able to handle it?

As I was building the courage to speak, I turned my head away again hearing my phone vibrate. I could see the notifications building up from Twitter on the screen from the previous hour; Felix noticed too and instantly shot out his hand to grab my device.

“Felix baby no do-.”

I tried to grab the annoying hardware before Felix could see anything, it it was too late. His eyes widened.

“Kill yourself you stupid bitch,

you’re so unworthy of a man like Felix like actual filth lmao,

You’re an ugly fat whore who will never amount to anything ,

Watch out Felix, she’s only with you for your money”

As Felix read the words aloud it felt as if thousands of knives were being stabbed into my body over and over again, but all I could do was stare at the floor in front of me, and not dare to look at Felix. I didn’t want him to know things were this bad, I tried to shield him from the pain I was feeling because he didn’t deserve to be included in the affliction. My heart hurt but I wasn’t going to let him be included in that agony.

I loved him too much.

“Baby….” I could feel his eyes bore into my figure and at that moment I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Everything that had pent up over the past months finally spilled out into the open atmosphere, and holy shit I was a sopping mess to say the very least. I huddled over as the sobs poured out of my mouth, they were mixed with so much vexation, sorrow, and panic as I didn’t know how to feel. Felix quickly sat next to me and put an arm over my physique, pulling me in closer to his broad frame. My head lay atop his lap while I cried as much as I could. He peacefully stroked my hair with his fingers, and every once in a while layed some soft kisses atop my head.

I leaned my head to fit in the crook of his neck,taking in the scent of his cologne. He held onto me tight, as if he was never going to let me go again.

“Baby, all this time…. why didn’t you tell me?” His voice was almost quivering but I knew he wasn’t going to cry.

“I- I didn’t want to worry you, you had so much to do for the tour and I thought it was dumb an-“ he stopped me.

“(Y/N) it’s not dumb that people are harassing you and making you feel this way. Listen, I love my fans each and every single one of them. However, you have to realize that in every good person there are another 5 evil ones who don’t respect mine or your feelings for one another, and those people are not true fans.”

He brought my face to look at his.

“Listen darling, I love you and if some people can’t respect that then, that’s their problem. Our love is stronger than this and I know we will overcome this hurdle. That’s all it is, these comments don’t matter they’re just people who have no respect or no life to worry about and all they want to do is take that anger and hurt into other people. But holy shit, I just thank god nobody hurt you or physically or came after you….I don’t know what I would do.” Felix kissed my nose and stroked the top of my hand with his very own sending small impulses of electricity up my body. The heat of his body comforted me and I had never felt more love for him than in that very moment. For once I could finally breathe again and smile.

Felix brought a hand to cup my cheek, the palm of his hand felt so reassuring as he brought his soft lips down to mine gently and with such passion. He kissed me as if we had all the time in the world yet it also felt as if it was our last moment together. The world could’ve ended right then and there and I would’ve felt content being in his arms.

I guess I learned it’s not good to hold things in, and now I know if I’m ever feeling sad or hurt that there are people who love me and are willing to listen. And as much as I wanted them to be, my problems were not small especially if they had me feeling the way I did. I don’t have to be alone even in my darkest thoughts or weakest moments.

All I know is Felix lifted a weight off my chest that was too heavy for me to even nudge. And for him I am more than thankful.

“Also those comments are bullshit because if anything darling you’re to good for me princess .”

I smirked at him.

“Oh really now.”

“Yeah but let’s get one thing straight.” I eyed him as he bit his lip, he coyly took the soft skin in between his teeth as his eyes went dark.

“ the only person who can call you a filthy whore is me. Got it?”

[flwrkisses]

I’M BACK!

After so many years, I am finally back on this account to write on here again! so requests will be opening! Along with major construction being done to both mobile and desk top themes!

See you all soon!