#straight up 'monking it' in the club

[semi-entropy]

style tests for my senior project

[1982brucespringsteen]

thokk and romero: tag-teaming a horde of zombies and being so normal about it

balasar:

[newkatzkafe2023]

charlotte la bouff reader with the monkey kings. (She's my favorite character 💗)

Blonde female monkey, loves pink, has a southern accent.

eager princess meeting a king.

😍 heart eyes for her seeing Wukong maybe at a ball or party.

Awwww Lottie from the princess and the frog, not to many Rich girls with golden hearts lately 🥰🥰🥰🥰

(Lmk Wukong) Oh Wukong what a wild blush you have especially being fond over and flirted with by a blond pink monkey. He was so cute you could eat him up, and Wukong was all for it. He also thinks your super cute with your cheerful personality, thick accent, and pink dresses. The best part is that your genuine with everything you both have and wel, he would be stupid to turn you down.🥰

(HIB Wukong) You were cooing at Not only Wukong and his cute little family, and it never fails to Baffle him. You have met him when you were shopping and you saw the most handsomest monkey you ever did see. I mean You thought you were the only stone monkey , but that's besides the point you ran over to him chirping with hearts in your eyes while Wukong stood there like a half-wit mouth agape. You flirted and purred as you hung on his arm, as he was blushing and his head spinning. From that day you would spoil him and his family with love and anything money can buy, and Wukong Although needed to get used to it never found you to be so bad yourself. 🤭

(MKR Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh man the best way to get on his good side is to inflat his ego until it pops. This all happened at a temple festival and he was stuck on guard duty as the monk was preying with some others. This is soooooooooo boring until he heard chirping. Wukong confused had looked around and spotted you in the distance, you wore a pink hatfu looking sweetly at him and let out another chirp. Wukong's jaw dropped and made his way to you in Curiosity and snuck over to meet you, and the next thing you both knew you and Wukong were flirting, purring and snuggling as You both got to know each other. He can do without the pink but God your to cute and irresistible for him to care.

(NR Wukong) Oh, How cute a blonde monkey came up to him with sparkles and hearts in her eyes......Like he ain't doing the same🙄😒 but anyway he met you at a club. You a brightly hot pink blonde monkey dancing to the music, he was making bedroom eyes at you. Then the shocking part came you had noticed him and looked over before purring giving him the same eyes and headed over, and found yourself chatting and having a few drinks he thought you were so adorable and hot. Before anyone one knew you were both making out in the back of the bar🤭🤭🤭

(Netflix Wukong) He LOVES your accent your clearly not from around here aren't you? Wukong favorite pass time is to listen to you talk about anything and everything, it's next to Listening to himself talk. I imagine you both having matching energies especially when getting excited or happy, and he always thinks it's adorable. It's also never hard to not spot you from a mile away as you always wore pink and let out your happy high pitch chirps. Over all Wukong adores you and everything you do for him, and makes sure to have always have you around.

(BMW Wukong) He got very cocky and full of himself especially learning that he got he had a blonde pink fan and cheerleader. You always had a crush on him from the time he crashed your birthday party to the celestial banquet, especially after the war with heaven. You found him so powerful and strong, and it was sooo sexy, but you were to shy to talk to him feeling to girly until one night he crashed another Celestial party and headed straight for you. You have know clue on what's happening but took his attention and affection as he promises to make you his queen.

(Destined one) My you make the destined one's head spinning with your seemingly endless energy, it's as goofy as it is terrifying. Although the destined one found it baffling why you show Interest in him of all demons, but didn't have the heart to send you away. After all you were clearly not a threat at all and just like him a little to much, although after months of getting use to your personality he really started to adore you and your loud, pink, sweet self. You also remind him of a ripe and tasty peach.

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG ♀️🎀👚🍨💟👜🐩💕💖💝💓

[featherwurm]

How to Karlach's and Tav's tail lengths and width compare? Are they the same, if one shorter/longer, is one thicker/thinner, do they have any scars etc :)

They both have pretty average tails overall - the length of their outseam plus about a foot or so - which for both of them is quite long. While I know Karlach shares the in-game model height with the tall fem tief of about 6', in my heart (and drawings) she is the same as her character brief of 7' (putting Zatavia at 6'9".) Tav's tail is a little longer than Karlach's, tapering to a thinner tip because she doesn't have the same skin webbing that Karlach does, and she just has a lighter build overall. Karlach's tail tip is more typical in shape - although Tav's tail isn't unusual in that regard - it's like having an attached or detached earlobe.

How I, personally, think BG3 tief tails work, with the caveat that I'm of the opinion that tiefs should still be able to be weird as hell despite Hasbro standardizing them a lot for marketability (compare 3e to 5e). You'll sometimes see cartilage on both sides (for a more classic devil 'point') and more variation on proportion of skin, making for heart or club shaped tail tips too. Similarly you might more rarely see bifurcation, or multiple cartilage ridges. I think of their tails as being about as dexterous and strong as a pinky finger - able to wrap around things and hold them, but not strong enough to pick up heavy things, hold their whole body, wield a weapon, or do fine, detailed work unless specifically trained for. With minimal fat distribution the tail tends to be the one of the last places on the body to show significant weight gain or loss.

Karlach's tail has scars in similar proportion to the rest of her body - lots of old, well-healed cuts and scratches, but nothing exceptional. Some probably have stories attached, others are just in the milieu of 'was fighting in hell for 10 years straight after being a bodyguard and a rambunctious kid.' Nothing particularly stands out as exceptionally bad.

Tav is similar, though less scarred overall, with markers of 25 years traveling as a wandering monk after 10 years of monastery training and a similarly active childhood. The one significant one is that she's missing the very tip of the hook of her tail - which she accidentally bit off as a toddler. She had gotten into a fight with it, as kids do, and the tail lost. Her poor mum came home to a bloody kitchen, husband, and daughter, although Tav was easily soothed after the initial shock and flailing. There was a surprisingly large amount of cleanup - tail wounds bleed like a bitch.

I know I draw them all over the place but this is because I operate on a principle called vibes, but that's my personal feelings on size and shape and such!

[no-psi-nan]

Based on that previous anon ask, I started wondering what could possibly motivate Saiki to be the one actually wooing Toritsuka, given his general passivity and the Inherent Cringe of liking Toritsuka.

And I think it would almost have to be a life-threatening situation for Saiki to do it hsfjdlshfks. His disastrous ace ass would really rather suppress eternal pining for Toritsuka to making a move on him than actually admit to having feelings lol. Maybe after like 5-10 years of Toritsuka being clueless would Saiki start making moves!

Here's the premise for a situation I thought up though, that would be fun:

Okay so in manga chapter 109, the occult club trip episode, Toritsuka shows off his bedroom, which has been outfitted with the latest in trendy goods.

Where'd he get the money for it? The monks were definitely not financing this, and the only time we see Toritsuka make money is afterwards, in chapter 130, when he charges tourists money to ring the new year's bell.

Toritsuka is obviously not working any sort of job, and it's unlikely that he's straight-up stealing money, so my explanation is that his dad has $$$$$ and occasionally feels a little guilty about sending his son to superhell a random temple, and can be convinced to fork over cash sometimes.

So anyways here's the actual situation: Toritsuka's dad is actually hella rich but Toritsuka has no clue that when his dad kicks the bucket that he's in for a mega inheritance.

However, there's a woman who's figured that out, and she's thinking that if she can trick Toritsuka into marrying her, she can get his dad killed off and then take everything in the divorce by making it seem like he was cheating on her or abusing her or something.

Saiki finds this out when Toritsuka excitedly presents his new girlfriend to him. Saiki would normally just tell him that she was evil, but he catches onto Toritsuka's excited and happy thoughts about finally feeling wanted instead of always being considered trash, and his hope that he'll finally get over his impossible crush on Saiki.

Now Saiki is stuck, because he knows Toritsuka will be completely crushed if he reveals to him that he's still garbage and that girl only wants him for financial reasons. Even if Saiki can trick the girl into admitting the truth, or if he can terrorize the girl into abandoning her scheme and dumping Toritsuka, the end result will still be Toritsuka feeling like shit.

The only way to save Toritsuka's newfound self-esteem would be to convince him to dump her on his own, at which point Saiki can get rid of her more permanently.

And at first, Saiki tries to make her look bad in front of Toritsuka, but this accomplishes nothing because Toritsuka is really determined to hang onto the only girl who's ever accepted him and he's also trying really hard to get over Saiki.

Saiki knows if he just bluntly tells Toritsuka that he likes him, Toritsuka won't believe it, and will (correctly) think that there's some ulterior motive involved. Toritsuka's not THAT stupid.

So there's basically no option left, except wooing Toritsuka so he dumps the girl in favor of Saiki. Saiki has to make it obvious that he really likes Toritsuka and would be open to dating him, but make it subtle enough that Toritsuka doesn't get suspicious.

And you could do this by having Saiki as himself or having Saiki go one step further and approaching Toritsuka as Kuriko, with a different enough look that Toritsuka won't recognize Saiki (and then have a moment where Toritsuka ends up recognizing her anyways because she keeps reminding him of Saiki).

"How would Saiki attempt to woo someone" is already a hilarious question to ponder, but adding in an oblivious Toritsuka makes that even funnier.

Adding this idea to the free real estate pile in case anyone wants to write this lmao.

[princess-of-the-corner]

So, I know you have an AtLa au for Miraculous Ladybug, but do you have the reverse? Like.

(THIS GOT LONG SO)

Aang is Ladybug. Zuko is Chat Noir. Ozai is Hawk Moth. Azula is Mayura. That kind of thing. cause my brain wouldn’t stop spinning this idea around last night, so like. All the random shit I came up with:

- Gyatso, who here is actually an old member of the Order that dipped out cause the Order kind of sucked, actually. He found and adopted Aang. Owns his own bakery. Also does martial arts. Is less than thrilled that his kid was chosen to be the Ladybug.

- half-baked idea that Gyatso replaces Fu here? But like. Still raising Aang. Also, he’s a touch less paranoid? Maybe?

- or, we have that random monk who was supposed to help Aang master the Avatar State be Fu? Or Roku, Roku could be Fu.

- Toph kind of has Corner!Chloé’s Aura Vision. She gets the Turtle.

- Toph’s dad is the mayor. Her mom runs a charity.

- Sokka gets the Fox. The flute doubles as both a boomerang and a sword.

- so like. By process of elimination, Katara SHOULD get the Bee? But. I know I said “Azula as Mayura” but instead, I think Azula should have the Bee & Katara should get the Peacock. Like. Either there’s a swap at some point, or the Bee got lost instead of the Peacock. Bee lost instead is probably easiest.

- You could also do Sokka as the Ladybug, Aang as the Fox.

- Or Aang has the Cat, Zuko the Ladybug. So many options.

- Suki with the Tiger? The Dragon?

- Sokka with the Dragon?

- ZUKO WITH THE DRAGON.

- Zuko with the Dragon. Sokka has the Ladybug. Katara has the Cat. Aang has the Fox. Toph has the Turtle. Suki has the Bee?

- Ty Lee and Mai are here, what Miraculous do they get?

- wait, Yue wouldn’t be dead, she’s here too. The Rabbit?

- Or Teo, the Kid with the flying wheelchair.

- the match-ups are too many.

- … in so many ways, actually.

- no one is straight.

- Zuko absolutely still has the big, F-off scar. It was absolutely inflicted by Ozai.

- Piandao as the school’s teacher, also coach of the local fencing/sword-fighting club.

- Pakku’s the principal.

- Bumi’s the gym teacher.

- Hakoda, Kya, and Bato live together on a boat in the Seine. Katara and Sokka have grown up on the water. I see boat tours, or maybe their job is to clean the river? Fishing? (Can you fish in the Seine?)

- Katara wants to be a doctor. Or therapist? No, Doctor.

- Sokka will probably be an engineer? Inventor isn’t a profession, is it? He’s also the DM anytime they do a D&D campaign.

- Iroh has a roving tea & pastry cart. He’s well known for giving out delicious tea, and sage advice. He has an ongoing rivalry with that annoying ice cream man, who Iroh is CONVINCED hasn’t ever heard of a health inspection, and who he constantly gets into fights with about his supposed “soulmate ice cream”.

- Azulon knew about the Miraculous, spent most of his life hunting for them. Imparted the knowledge and desire into his kids.

- Iroh and Ozai spent a lot of time when they were young adults looking for the Miraculous, but eventually Iroh met someone, fell in love, and had Lu Ten, so stopped caring as much for the Miraculous. When a car accident killed his wife, and crippled his son, Ozai tried to dangle the possibility of bringing Iroh’s wife back, or healing Lu Ten, to get him to help again, and Iroh shot him down. The pair are now quite tense with one another. (other idea, wife dies, so Iroh DOES agree to try and search for the Miraculous, but the resulting search ends with Lu Ten dying, so Iroh gives up the Miraculous entirely)

- (if we don’t go with option two, or sort of combine them) Lu Ten is still around here, he’s in a wheelchair from a car accident. He can TECHNICALLY walk, but it causes him so much pain if he tries for long periods, the wheelchair is easier.

- this is definitely a Team Miraculous Sort of vibe.

- Azula has a heel-turn, obviously.

then, I can’t decide between:

- Ursa and Ozai are divorced, which was a HUGE scandal for Ozai’s company. Ursa took Zuko, and tried her best to get Azula too, but Ozai “Won” that one, so Zuko and Azula don’t see each other much. Ursa and Zuko live with Iroh, who supported them during the divorce. Ursa has since remarried, and had another child, Zuko and Azula’s half-sister.

OR

- Ursa is dead, it’s a tossup whether Ozai killed her or not, but he wants to revive her, so is seeking out the Miraculous. Azula eventually either gets told, or figures it out, but Zuko doesn’t. Ozai’s desire to revive Ursa is less “I miss my wife” and more “How dare you try and get away from me”/Show of power. He’s used the Butterfly for years to make his company blossom, but he wants more power.

OR

- Ursa is either dead or missing, and Zuko lives with Iroh rather than Ozai. Iroh filed for custody after the Scar Incident, but while he managed to get custody of Zuko, he couldn’t get custody of Azula. 

Thoughts, feelings, Opinions? New Ideas?

-

Okay okay okay:

Love the idea of Gyatso taking Fu’s role. I think he wouldn’t choose Aang at first but Aang would get involved later.

Sokka as Ladybug is 100% perfect and beautiful.

Zuko I feel comfortable narrowing down to the Cat or Dragon. I think it kiiiiinda depends on where his mindset is at but we’ll come back to that because I did have Thoughts™ on a S1/2: Atla Edition before so I have ideas on the family.

obvs Ozai has to be Hawkmoth but I think his motives are more pure wanting more power. Maybe add in like. Instead of ruler of a nation he’s just head of a company. The family business he ‘inherited’. Except he’s running it into the ground because he fucking sucks at making good business decisions. I’ll come back to my thoughts on Ursa later.

Toph as the turtle seems like a decent idea, but idk if it fits her right. I think the Ox would be better for her.

Aang with the Turtle though! Both in reference to the Lion Turtle but also how he’s very protective?

Katara has to get involved…. hm. I’m not sure there’s a Miraculous that would fit her. I think having a sibling LB/CN duo could work if I don’t give Zuko the cat. On the flipside the Dragon could ironically work as the ML Dragon is more Water than Fire.

Suki, on the other hand, has so many options. The Tiger if Toph doesn’t get it. I could see her with the Snake (she’s a leader and good strategist in her own right, so she’d do well with it.). Tempted to leave the Peacock on the Heroes��� team and give it to her because ya know fans but idk how she’d handle the Sentis.

Yue 100% gets the Rabbit. Both have Moon Connections™

Azula - I get where you’re going with Bee and that works but she’s also on board for the Dragon. Or the Monkey because she knows the art of Derision.

Ty Lee - BEE. Hands down she gets the Bee. Paralysis motherfucker!!!

Mai - I actually think I’d give her the mouse? Like, her hair. Quiet as a mouse. She’s the one person on this crew with multiple tiny weapons.

I’m bringing Jin back in and giving her the Pig!!

I love how we’re letting most people live lmao. But yeah without a war or spirit nonsense our only options are like. Gang violence? But yeah anyway

Gyatso is being low-key. Idk how exactly he got Aang. Like Aang probably has less trauma in that I’m not gonna be like ‘ah yes he was in an orphanage that was victim to arson’ but like. Does he have parents that he lost and were presumably friends with Gyatso to leave Aang in his custody, or did Gyatso just find an abandoned baby on the doorstep?

Aang could actually have the Adrien plot of wanting to go to school! Like, he was homeschooled by Gyatso for most of his life because while Gyatso isn’t /as/ paranoid as Fu, he’s still a touch ‘let’s err on the side of caution’. But Aang decides he wants to socialize more and school is a great place for that!

I think most of the various leaders are going to be part of the City Council. The Earth King is the City Mayor, and yeah he’s being manipulated by half the council. Long Feng is chief of police ofc. While I have Ozai as owning some mega company rather than directly in politics, he does fund the city to get what he wants and has Mai’s father on city council to essentially be his proxy as he can’t be bothered. Tbh probably the only sane and good council members are Hakoda and Arnook like bruh. The other good but not sane one is Bumi and no one’s sure he’s actually on the council he just shows up to meetings and the mayor counts his vote.

the Kya/Hakoda/Bato polycule? Beautiful. And yes they get the houseboat lmao. You mentioned cleaning the river so I think I’m gonna give Hakoda a bit of a lean into trying to make environmental changes to the city.

Toph’s parents are still rich af. And yes they still both baby her and want her to be this demure debutante when she’s here to throw hands with anyone and everyone. Does trade Earthbending for Magic Synesthesia

Okay now the Fire Royals because let’s have fun with them:

Search for the Miraculous probs started with Sozin. Passed the torch and the company to Azulon.

No idea why Ozai and Ursa married but it probably wasn’t a good reason.

Switching up the stuff with Lu Ten so he’s alive. But he’s in a coma and the doctors know that even if he does recover he’s not going to go 100% back to normal. (he wakes up after a few months. And while physical therapy goes well, he’s mostly in a wheelchair. Can use a cane for short distances if needed.). But yeah while it’s unsure if he’s gonna make it Iroh’s a wreck.

Which leads to a similar to canon thing of Ozai going ‘hey how about I inherit the company instead?’ and then having Ursa kill Azulon. Still similar in part of the deal is her leaving and Ozai tries to have her killed but she disappears too well.

With Ozai getting all the inheritence, Iroh just low-key cuts all losses in the family and  opens his own tea shop. Technically he could retire and live a grand lifestyle, but he likes doing things. So Jasmine Dragon it is!

You know that post like ‘you correct your dad on his zoom meeting so he kicks you out and says you can only come home if you find Bigfoot’? That’s kinda what goes down for the Agni Kai situation. Zuko gets burned and Ozai throws him out. 

Zuko goes to Iroh’s place because he has nowhere else to go. Due to this being  a modern au thing there’s some of a custody battle deal. But like. Ozai  is a manipulative little shit who frames it as ‘oh I didn’t kick him out, he ran away! such a bad kid. If he wants to live with an uncle that coddles him then fine!’.

I’m gonna shift from canon slightly in the sense of that Zuko and Azula never cut contact. It’s easier because they’re still in the same city, in the same school, and have technology. Ofc Ozai forbids it, but while Azula is scared of him the differences in the AU mean that she’s not fully cut off from them regardless of anyone’s wants. (this gets even easier with the Miraculous when they can hang out as Heroes together)

Neither Zuko nor Azula know about the Miraculous stuff in the family history. Because Ozai either doesn’t think they’ll be helpful, or doesn’t want to risk them double crossing him. He does use Azula to set up secnarios for Akumas tho

I don’t know why Iroh wouldn’t go ‘oh a butterfly villain? Probably Ozai being a fucker’.

[thislovintime]

Peter Tork and The Peter Tork Project, early 1980s; photos by Michael Ventura/Alamy.

“Eventually, Tork moved to New York City, working odd jobs and performing ‘sporadically.’ In the early ‘80s, after he quit drinking, he started a couple of bands, Peter Tork and the New Monks, and the heavy-metal-leaning Peter Tork Project. But Tork says that heavy drinking had ‘left me with mediocre skills. Until I started working on my skills again, it didn’t matter.’” - Los Angeles Times, October 20, 1992

“In June of 1982, Peter Tork was in my face again. It was at a gritty, downscale, but packed-to-the-gills club in Boston called Bunratty’s. (Long gone.) Tork, then 40, was on a tour he described as the ‘I Have to Laugh to Keep from Crying Tour.’ It was billed as Peter Tork and the New Monks – Tork plus four crack musicians providing a hard-rock ride down memory lane. We talked a bit between sets. Me: ‘What it’s like going through life and to always be viewed as a former Monkee?’ Tork: ‘Compared to what?’ I paused for a moment and thought to myself, ‘Exactly! When this is the life you’ve known, what can you compare it to?’ (This was one of the best answers I’d ever had to one of my queries.) I re-used this anecdote when I talked to Ringo years later – switching up Monkees for Beatles in his case – and he chuckled. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘What can you compare it to? This is where I am and this is what I am.’ So, why were we Bostonians packed shoulder-to-shoulder in the post-punk heyday to hear ‘60s pop done live and loud? ‘A lot of people come out and they want to remember the old songs,’ Tork said. ‘They want to drift back to when they were fetuses or however old they were then.’ [...] ‘When I arrive at the gates of St. Peter,’ Tork quipped, ‘he’s going to say First one to go . . . okay, we’ll let you in.’ One Peter to another. ‘When I quit the Monkees,’ Tork continued, ‘the first thing I wanted to do was divorce myself from the whole thing entirely.’ Tork formed a ‘straight- ahead pop rock’ band, Peter Tork and/or Release, but it failed to go anywhere. In late 1971 and early 1972 Tork spent three months in jail for possession of hashish. Tork, who was a folk musician prior to Monkee-dom, resurfaced in 1977 to play an acoustic gig at CBGB’s, at the time New York’s prime punk club. In a sense, punk was responsible for bringing Tork back to work. The Sex Pistols did a vicious sloppy cover of ‘Steppin’ Stone,’ and other punk new wave bands have embraced the Monkees on two levels: 1) damn good pop tunes and, 2) potential kitsch value. Tork, who was married and living in Venice, Calif., was on a tour playing small U.S. clubs. (Dolenz and Jones, incidentally, had also formed Monkees facsimiles at that time and were rumored still to be big stars in Japan.) Tork has been around the area all week – he was playing an even dive-ier club in nearby Somerville the next night – unveiling a repertoire that consisted of some Monkees tunes, some non-Monkees originals, and some early rock ‘n’ roll covers. He wasn’t exactly playing the Monkees’ songs by the (Boyce & Hart) book. I’d venture to say this was almost hard rock/heavy metal Monkees music. ‘The [Monkees] records are a little thin by contemporary standards,’ Tork said. ‘People who are just into rock ‘n’ roll and had a lot of contempt for the Monkees phenomenon as a whole aren’t going to come in the first place. People who are on the borderline – they liked the Monkees and they like rock ‘n’ roll today – are going to come. If I play it like it was off the records, they’re going to say ‘Well, it was nice to see him but so what?’ If I play ’em right and they want to dance, I’ve got good musicians whacking away and they’re going to come back.” Tork’s musicians – Phil Simon and Nelson Bogart, guitars; Vince Barranco, drums; and Paul Ill, bass – have played variously with Little Feat, Dave Brubeck, Joe Beck and Carolyne Mas. [...] Although not signed to a label, Tork said producer Jimmy Miller (Rolling Stones, Traffic) was ready to record an album with them. (Jimmy Miller, who lived in our region, was had made maybe the greatest Stones album ever in Exile on Main St., but was drug-damaged goods by that point, sad to say.) ‘My goals right now are to make a living entertaining,’ Tork said. ‘Put away something for my old age, cookouts on the weekend, no big thing. You never know what’s going to happen. One of these days I might make a mark on my own.’”- Rock and Roll Globe, February 2022

[slovo-kvnnt]

✦HEADCANONS by

Tf2 Freakshow.✦

<×(and small drawings of my Heancanons)×>

⚠️warning⚠️.

These ARE HEADCANONS, that is, they are not really canons of the characters and it is used for PERSONAL USE. nothing here is confirmed by the creators of different Freaks. but hey thanks for watching ;).

✦Panis cupcakes may not know how to read, write or even count well, but he is an excellent piano player.

(by the way I made these drawings of the different versions of painis cupcakes, includes my Heancanon).

✦Intelligent Heavy and Vagineer are the only ones with the sense of humor of...

MATHEMATICAL SCIENCES.

✦Both Cakehole and Pi$$ are fans of Naruto. And in fact, Cakehole is the vice-president of the Otaku Club and Handsome Rogue is the president-at-large.

✦Ass Pancakes is wondering if he's really straight.

that is why both Gentlemanspy, as Spyper and even his best friend, SoupCock Porkpie often call him "bisexual Dumbass".

✦Pi$$ cakehole unlike the others, he needs glasses to see from a distance or read more comfortably. But once Cakehole grabbed his glasses and half and part of the glass broke, so he had to fix it himself, and since that day nobody touches him.

and curiously, he is in a relationship with Cbs but let's say that his relationship is something... unusual

(and they both smoke marijuana, while Cakejole prefers cocaine)

a strange mix between obsession and hate... yes hehe...

✦Polite Spy when he has a specific feeling or emotion his eyes change color depending on what emotion it is.

✦Cps smokes in the church bathroom, yes literally everyone calls him a ...

H Y P O C R I T E

EVEN ERZENGEL, Karmasolly and Dream demo (rarely, but does).

✦Allright, we all know that erzengel and cps hate each other and it's for the same reason that cbs would HAVE to BE in hell. but let's say that he only defended him from his fate and that's it, arguments, fights, dissolution, etc., but even so Brutal and Pure are friends.

✦Karma Soldier and Lord Degroot used to be best friends until one day everything changed forever ...

✦Each Freak has his sexual orientation or how that Freak identifies.

for example, Soldine IDENTIFIES AS AN ORANGE CAR- okno( but they tend to make those kinds of jokes with Ghost, MSG, Orangeman, Cyborgneer and Medizard).

(I was thinking about digitizing but due to personal problems and mere laziness, I couldn't do it, and now I realized that I didn't color the pants from CBS XDDDDDD)

✦The Spyper Red, or simply Red. And his personality is the opposite, he is someone malevolent and a professional psychopath.

✦Medizard x Cakehole pi$$ is good

✦Demo Samedi and Samedi Spy are Haitian

✦Ghost doesn't like to be called "GHOSTY" (Major and Soldine never misses an opportunity to call it that).

✦Madic has a collection of pigeons in his laboratory and one of the birds he has is a raven named Lewis, after Major Lewis.

✦Cyborspy has CyborSoldier as a sex slave. not to specify their shady situations... but for now no one knows... FOR NOW.

CyborPyro has the appearance of a woman, because once everything was destroyed. The only thing they were able to recover was his head and some small parts of it.

Cybormedic cleverly spruced up its appearance and gave it some personality and the FemCyborPyro was born. her appearance is because it would be easier to distract her enemies using her female "Methods".

Fem/CyborPyro can be identified as both "SHE" and "HE" but can also be referred to as "they" or "It"

✦Cyborscout and Drunk Monk (actually this is Canon XD) are a couple. And they're planning a wedding, they just can't decide who the best man will be.

precisely MSG and cyborneer fight over that.

✦everything you saw here is an "AU" Alternate Universe (Slovo's AU).

a world where innocent respawners and mercenaries leave the servers empty and discolored.

The pacifist Freaks are more dangerous than the feared High Ranker, but their psycho mode or "killer instinct" is disabled, of course unless you want to unleash TRUE CHAOS.

Let's assume that the real danger would be the peaceful Freaks like Cps, I.H and Politespy ESPECIALLY.

So HECU, from time to time interrogate Freaks of this type and examine their way of thinking, socializing, defending themselves, and seeing the Tf2Freaks-Wolrd in their angle view ...

"So, those idiots over there *points to all the freaks, including Soldine and the entire HECU staff* are they one step from the far future?...."

yes... but not at the same time. My AU is in the 20's post 2001. Psycho Freaks lost interest in killing due to server inactivity and are getting more and more modernized, until reaching a "current" state.

HECU Staff Documentary Narrator: Everyone is in a neutral or peaceful state for now, but they miss the good old days...

[therecordchanger62279]

18 NEW PLAYLISTS

     I’ve been building more playlists for my iTunes file so that I can get more use out of my collection. It enables me to listen on the computer when I’m working, or at the exercise room when I’m working out. And it’s a great opportunity to mix and match artists, albums or styles so that all the music sounds fresh, and new. Context matters. And most music fits together far better than any radio programmer or Spotify algorithm would lead you to believe.

     Here’s the latest. The number of tracks is in parentheses.

1971 (283) 1972 (317) 1973 (377) An overview of each entire year in popular music. Most of it is Rock, Pop, and Soul but there's a sprinkling of Jazz, and Country as well.

Beg, Scream & Shout (144) The complete box set of the same name – a Rhino set of 144 great Soul singles of the 1960s.

Bill Evans (31) Sourced from The Complete Riverside Recordings box set, and The Best of Bill Evans on Verve. Three of Evans’ classic albums for Riverside along with an overview of his recordings for Verve.

Dexter Gordon (27) A collection of 70s recordings sourced from The Complete Prestige Recordings box (four of his best albums on the label), and closes with his Manhattan Symphonie album for Columbia.

James “Blood” Ulmer (50) A mix of 40 years of his recordings as a solo artist, and including the Music Revelation Ensemble, The Odyssey Band, and The Thing band recordings. His first album, Revealing, from 1977 kicks it off.

Jefferson Airplane (79) The first five albums complete, a selection of tracks from Bark, Early Flight, and the live Thirty Seconds Over Winterland, too. It closes with the 1989 self-titled reunion album.

John Wetton (80) Sourced from the excellent The Studio Recordings Anthology Vol. 1, along with his work with King Crimson, Uriah Heep, U.K., Asia, and the Steve Hackett Genesis Revisited project.

Laswell Mixes (18) Collects all three Bill Laswell remix albums of the works of Miles Davis, Panthalassa, and Panthalassa: The Remixes, and Carlos Santana, Divine Light - Reconstruction & Mix Translation.

Miles (Circle in The Round) (10) Straight recreation of the Miles Davis anthology Circle in The Round – a brilliant overview of Miles’ career with Columbia from 1955-1975.

Miles (Directions) (12) Another recreation of another Miles anthology from Columbia spanning his first 20 years with the label. This is not available on CD, nor is it available to stream, but all the tracks have been issued elsewhere since its 1981 release. I just brought them all together to recreate the album.

Miles Live (41) One of my better ideas, I think. This collects five editions of live recordings from The Miles Davis Quintet spanning the years 1960-1965. What makes it unique is that each of the quintets features a different saxophonist – none of whom is John Coltrane. Stockholm 1960 features Sonny Stitt, In Person Friday Night at The Blackhawk (1961) features Hank Mobley, Live at the 1963 Monterey Jazz Festival has George Coleman, Miles in Tokyo (1964) showcases Sam Rivers, and Highlights from The Plugged Nickel (1965) is with Wayne Shorter. Great opportunity to hear how the quintet evolved through the years, and how each of the saxophonists changed Miles’ sound.

Monk on Riverside (75) 12 Monk studio and live classic albums sourced from the massive 15 CD The Complete Riverside Recordings Box.

Northern Soul (124) Sourced from the Northern Soul box set, and The Decca Scene: Northern Soul CD. The best music from that uniquely British club scene.

Sonny Rollins (14) A trio of Rollins albums beginning with The Freedom Suite from 1958, The Bridge from 1962, and the Live in Graz, Austria November 12, 1966 trio set. Rollins in three different settings playing at his best.

Tacocat (25) Until a couple of weeks ago, I’d never heard this band. I picked up their first two CDs after hearing about them on a music podcast. Three girls and a guy with a girl group/pop/punk/alternative bent. Lots of hooks, and lots of fun. Reminded me of the 1980s indie scene before everything turned serious, and dark. NVM, and Lost Time are available direct from Sub Pop at very reasonable prices.

Virtuosos (132) Joe Satriani, Steve Vai, Vangelis, John Paul Jones, Brand X, Steve Howe, Phil Manzanera, and Anthony Phillips – all great players collected in one place in a music clinic free for all. I wanted something different, so I brought great players together who really didn’t fit elsewhere.

I also split The Bangles playlist into a group list (89), and a side projects list (137). My two PJ Harvey lists are now three – the original albums (86), the demo albums (68), and a live only playlist (55). The 1969 (300) and 1970 (370) playlists were expanded by nearly double. The 1969-1973 playlists now total more than 1600 songs. Large playlists are best for genres, or year in music lists, and best heard on shuffle. Shorter playlists work better for artists, I find. The larger lists are films, the shorter ones work as snapshots.

[stardust948]

ATLA Live action eps. 1

Already the bending and action is really good. (eat it 2010 movie)

Rooting for EK guy! Even though I know what's gonna happen to him </3

NOW ALL OF CHINA KNOWS YOUR HERE!!!!

Yeahhhh I liked it better when Katara narrated.

Oong

The actor who plays Aang is so cute!!!

Homie can straight up fly in this one huh?

"There may come a day when you wished you spent more time with your teachers" ---- GAHHHH WHY???

OK I like that Sozin made everyone think they're going to attack the EK instead of Airbenders. Very clever.

BRO!!! THE INVASION PART WAS INSANE!!!

Love seeing all the different AN fighting and defending themselves. Also nooo Monk Gyasto and the babies 😭😭😭

People kept talking about how intense the AN massacre was. Honestly, I was expecting it to be a lot more graphic but maybe that's just me.

Wolf Cove?! Why am I just now finding out Sokka and Katara's village is called Wolf Cove?! God, I got so many fics to re-edit.

Katara baby I miss your RAGGEEEEE

Aang's awaking is pretty underwhelming compared to the cartoon ngl.

LA - accident??? Aang passes out.

OG - Pure unbridled 14 y/o girl rage + Katara purposely hacking away the rest of the ice with Sokka's club. Aang immediately wants to play games 1st ask questions later.

Dallas I'll give you 5 bucks and a hug if you say honor just once.

Glad to see Sokka is still done with everything.

Thank you Gran-Gran for the OG opening we all know by heart.

Ok that was way too much exposition.

1st cuss of the show goes to... this guy.

JEE! IT'S JEE!!!

Gran-Gran quit spoileriing thing! (JK we still love you)

The FN ship docks. Silently. Not plows through the ice almost right through the village.

Okay.

I am Sokka, son of Hakoda, lord of... Snow and Ice.

Love him in every universe.

I miss Sokka and Zuko's ridiculous 1st fight.

"Where's the glory in that?"

G-Glory?! Dallas, 5 bucks, a hug, and half a sandwich for one HONOR. Just one!

Love Sokka's child army pelting them with rocks

"There's no way you're getting me on that-"

*hard cut to Sokka screaming on Appa*

Fantastic.

FN ship escape was underwhelming too.

No Aang interrupting Iroh's nap. Or Zuko yeeting himself off the top deck onto Aang's glider. Or Sokka smacking Zuko in the head with his club. Or Katara freezing the solider on deck.

"Where do we go?"

North. To learn waterbending. Like you always wanted to!

Good lord they even took Katara's drive to learn waterbending 😭

No snapping Aang out of Avatar State and promising to be his new family.

Okay.

Zuko's angerly drawing at his desk! 🤣🤣🤣

Honestly mood.

Ok that was fine. Gonna watch the OG episode now.

[witchcraftandburialdirt]

For the relationship prompt, which interactions or friendship do you think affected Robin the most ?

Send my muse anons about their relationships. ANON ASK

Oh man, I'm going to have to answer this one as a mun because this changes a lot depending on where in the timeline you're asking. There's also A LOT of muses that Robin has interacted with! Please note that for this I will be mostly sticking to threads/interactions that have been developed in writing, almost all of Robin's relations have had an influence on him, but as for MOST--It'll be things me and the mun have developed/written together. I assume you mean in general but even that is a loaded question, so I'll be breaking this up into specific parts of his life or AUs because I do consider those quintessential for helping me as a mun develop him. (I will NOT be discussing Abel or Bel in this post as it is WAY too much and I could write a novel on their relationship. If you all would want this explained in a separate post, just let me know because it is extremely extensive).This is going to be LONG FYI, there's no way I could condense all of the wonderful relations Robin has made. So! Lets get this long post GOING!

POST-DEATH CANON VERSE:

Who would have thought being a revived corpse wandering for 2 straight years within Ionia would bring so many people into his life? One of the first and immensely influential relationships he had was when he left Ionia to travel to Bilgewater during the Harrowing, where he met Akio (@aquatic-hybrid) by coincidence, and the two worked together to clear the docks of the lost souls traveling from the Shadow Isles. Their relationships started off suspicious and unsure, but has led to one of the warmest, sweetest friendships Robin has had in a long time. It's a little stupid, but Akio gets hurt a lot and Robin has really been able to reconnect with the magic he's actually good at by healing him. Akio has pushed him over and over to be a better person, he hasn't asked too much about his past...and he just...accepts him. Robin really loves Akio as if he were his own brother, one of the people he truly feels at home with.

Another relationship that has humanized Robin is his friendship with Noelle (@songofsilentechoes), something about her kind nature just immediately drew him in and sparked his urge to protect her. This is one of those relationships that started off quite well and only got better as time passed; there was no judgement between the two of them and Noelle, like Akio, simply accepted him as he is. They meet together often for tea and a weekly book club where they read together and chit chat about life, Noelle's travels, any advice she might need in regards to magic etc. She is an extremely sympathetic and nice person--genuine to the point that Robin lowered his walls quite quickly with her, and now considers her close to his heart. This influence was much more passive on her end, as her own curiosity in terms of magic has reignited Robin's love of learning. He wants to be someone she can depend on, and be better. Side note: Bel actually finds Noelle VERY charming, it knows she won't harm Robin and has decided that she's worth protecting to keep its food happy.

Something more recent in terms of interactions falls to Lee SIn (@ionianelder), where Robin's fears and lies for himself have just melted away. Where Akio and Noelle fall into friends, equals and even students of magic, Lee Sin falls into a category that Robin has desperately needed since he was younger; a mentor. His memories of other figures like this are jumbled at best and lost at worst, but Lee Sin is one of the first to truly connect with him emotionally and tell him, from the heart, that he will be okay and get through this torment. Robin sort of...broke when he met Lee, granted he was already on his way to the edge of the plateau but the monk really pushed him over the edge and now he's hanging on desperately--when in reality he needs to just...let go. Lee Sin, although it hasn't happened yet, is going to really help Robin drop the past pain he's carried with him. It'll be a very good change, Robin may even learn to forgive himself.

Another one, man this is really never ending Robin stop meeting people, is Sett...Oh Sett, angry, traumatized, pained Sett (@pitgritted). This interaction definitely takes place a bit more in the future once Robin has left his burrow and is ready to speak with people again, and he found himself working as the chief medical staff for the pit fighters. This is another case of "he can practice healing magic for its original intended purpose" and has become a mentor figure to the younger, less experienced staff members. Not only this but his actual connection to Sett himself is an immensely interesting study into how people suffer the consequences of causing trauma, not just experiencing it themselves. Jojo and I have spoken in length about how they both have toxic qualities that bleed into their everyday lives, but they are trying so hard to dampen the harshness of these affects. Sett who can't use physical intimidation on Robin, and Robin who can't use emotional manipulation on Sett--because they do genuinely care for the other and don't want to scare/hurt them. There is, well, a certain peace I think that they feel with eachother--there is no antipathy for what the other has done, no need to "fix" the other, after all what hypocrisy would that be? It is an equally terrifying and comforting feeling to see a reflected inversion of yourself within another person, to want to be there for them but also knowing that they are acutely aware of your shortcomings because they, too, experience them. Robin has remarked, not outloud of course, that Sett's heart is fragile, I'm not sure Sett would ever be able to defend that from Robin; how could he when he sees the same fragility within the mage? They're very sweet. It'll be a very confounding, yet satisfying, arc in their lives, I'm sure.

In another timeline, something I call the bad ending (where Robin does heal but ends up falling into bad habits again), he actually has a quite captivating relationship with Jhin (@curtain-cxll). This also takes place moreso in the future, but where Robin has stayed in his burrow and has not abandoned it yet. Although the thread is just taking its first steps, Raven and I have plotted that it will fall into a game of cat and mouse that is intellectually stimulating for both Jhin and Robin. And also...something else happened by accident. Once again these two do not try to "fix" one another, but rather nurture what life has molded them into. From their first meeting there was a strange predilection that invaded both of them, I honestly think this is what made them want to burrow inside of the other one--its rare to find someone you instantly spark with (romantically or otherwise). Jhin really allows Robin to open up in terms of accepting the darker parts of himself, a part of him he will never fully get rid of, a specific toxicity Jhin can play off of, he just...accepts this part of him, and continues to encourage Robin's interests and it is shockingly quite sweet. This isn't to say Jhin is immune either, how he has craved someone who will not mock his ideas and actually listen to what he has to say, he is still human after all--and holds all of the insecurities of one. Even though the beginning is majority manipulation, Robin's reverence and appreciation of Jhin's thoughts is just intoxicating. "It isnt time yet, after all, I'd prefer my performance to be a duet." has me by the throat, the one person that has ever valued him in the same light that he values them. As art, as beauty despite all of his faults. Hell we've even discussed them living and traveling together. It's very much crafted around the poem of "Life and Death are lovers", and as a mun I really wasn't expecting to plot such a...weirdly pleasant story about self love with these two, both souls lost in solitude finding solace in one another. With a lot of murder on the side, of course. Side note: Bel and Jhin actually get along quite well too--it's very very funny to me. Bel legit gives him advice--best wingman. The demon will eventually also decide to protect Jhin as a way to keep its food safe--lord have mercy upon Runeterra.

MODERN VERSE

Oh Miss Evelynn (@agonizedembrace) do you even know how much you've shifted the course of his life? Modern verse is a...weird one, I originally wasn't planning on having Robin be a reincarnation but it led to so much deliciousness I can't imagine it any other way. For Evelynn, this is the second time their souls have met, but now she truly understands what it means to care and even love, and what she was not able to recognize within the long ago past. As such, when she meets Robin again, she makes the rather emotional instantaneous decision to pseudo-adopt him into KDA and her other nefarious activities. She wants to keep him safe, perhaps due to past guilt of not being able to save his life before, and actively funds not only his life, but is emotionally invested in him, even if he doesn't remember her. Robin's family is still alive in this verse, and he can't deny that Evelynn has become part of his family within his own heart, he adores her and considers her one of his closest friends, despite the fact that she is his boss. He feels an exceptional depth of emotion towards her that he cannot explain, perhaps he will never be able to explain why he trusts her so much, why he knows almost instantly that he loves her, and that she, despite not showing it, loves him. I think this relationship captures the essence of how love transcends time and never truly leaves our souls, it is like a stain--impossible to scrub away no matter how roughly we scrub and bleach and try to erase. It is apart of us-- forever, even if we did not categorize it as love at the time, and affects us from that moment onward. Their interactions in Modern verse show what could have been if life had been kinder, if they had understood how to feel properly when they first met, a second chance to embrace and love and cry and feel so much more than they ever thought possible within their own lives. I think they are two souls that will continue to find eachother over and over again, they are sure to follow one another...maybe even after the sun burns out.

There are certain relationships that just...help one shed the stresses of life and expectations, and Robin finds that relaxation within Danny (@bells-of-black-sunday). In this timeline Robin has less so fallen into a dark pit, and moreso walked into it willingly, and this allows him to fall for someone who is by no means a good person--but makes him laugh and smile and is healthy for him. In all verses, but specifically Modern, Robin is stressed out beyond belief, he is constantly working, constantly trying to be the best WITHIN his work, and has a very difficult time accepting himself as he is. He's a very lonely mind often plagued with delusions of imposter syndrome and never feeling very good about himself--and Danny has this uncanny ability to just make him feel at ease and help wipe that all away. Perhaps it is his casual nature, his ability to just...speak how he feels and be honest with Robin about things, but coming home feels like letting 50lbs off of his shoulders. He can enjoy a quiet, simple little life with his boyfriend who, unknowingly, erases the thoughts of "never being enough" by confirming and showing how much he loves him, as he is, and that he actively wants him in his life. They know what the other does, what evil deeds they perform, and openly communicate that it doesn't matter--their desire for the other doesn't have an expiration date. Danny shows Robin how to enjoy life's simple pleasures, and Robin returns that in the affection Danny craves. Their communication methods have also influenced Robin immensely, he doesn't have to worry about arguing with Danny or being imperfect, since they tackle disagreements as a team. It's really healthy for Robin, and has taught him a lot of self love.

PRE-DEATH ROBIN: ACADEMIA DAYS

I've left this one for last because where it is heading is still a huge coin toss and it is exceedingly exciting to divert from Robin's pre-established canon. While the thread is also in its baby steps, I already know that Viktor, Silco, and Jinx (@misstantabismuses) are going to steer Robin's storyline in a completely different direction than was previously explored. It's a blank slate with a version of Robin that hasn't full let himself descend into wickedness. I've often stated that Robin just needed one person to walk beside him in his darkest hours, and maybe he would have actually healed when he needed to, and Abel is pushing him to open up to Viktor. He feels comfortable around the surgeon, and wants to bond with him since he does admire him quite a bit. Who knows if this will be good for him? Who knows if he won't follow the Machine Herald down into Zaun's depths? How will this jump into darkness be different? I can't help but feel that Viktor's own empathy for people will rub off on Robin, he may fall into using "good" magic way sooner than anticipated. I'm rubbing my evil little fly hands in anticipation. Silco and Jinx will most likely affect him in a negative way, although I can't say for certain because there's so much to explore. It's been revealed that Robin has an accidental saviour complex towards Jinx as well since he sees himself in her, so that's a whole other can of worms to dive into and explore. While not much has happened in terms of threads, I KNOW this is going to drastically influence him in this timeline, and man oh man is it going to be a FUN exploration since Miss T is exceptional at writing and plotting. A "what if" timeline that will probably end up affecting his timeline with specific parts.

If your muse wasn't mentioned here, and you want to know more about how they've affected Robin, feel free to drop into my inbox and ask! I had to forcibly stop myself from writing more since this was already getting exceptionally long, LOL. He has had MANY interactions and it would be impossible to list them all here, so feel free to pop in if you want more info!

[mywifeleftme]

308: Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever // Hope Downs

Hope Downs Rolling Fevers Coastal Blackout 2018, Sub Pop (Bandcamp)

Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever, one of those borderline-insufferable indie rock names like Clap Your Hands Say Yeah or Two-Door Cinema Club that seems to confirm every negative stereotype about the genre in a single phrase, rolled into my life in the spring of 2018 and went into near constant rotation for a solid year before slipping almost entirely out of memory until I pulled this record off the shelf today. A Melbourne five-piece with three guitarists who all sing (and all sing kinda the same way), Rolling Fever Coastal Blackouts were owners of the most propulsive jangle of the late part of the decade, the kind of band who put wheels on your feet if you’re walking and wings on your wheels if you’re biking or driving. Absolute summer montagecore lads, and as I sink back into the grooves of their debut LP Hope Downs I’m won over all over again. Nearly any of these songs, with their mileage-eating consistency of four-through-the-floor pace and thousand-yard-stare affect that make three minutes sound like five or seven, could satisfyingly open or close the record or a show. 35 of said minutes is just the perfect amount to leave you balanced on a knife’s edge as to whether to play the whole thing over again if the record’s done and your errand isn’t. There’s an easy mastery of dynamics, the sense of just when to step in with a harmony to kick things up a notch—I’ve seldom heard a better set of these tricks than this record’s “Exclusive Grave.” Jangle pop’s a well-worn genre, so there are plenty of easy names to drop here (Aussie and otherwise), but I don’t think it’s needed—Rolling Coastal Fever Blackouts are a refinement rather than a revolution, but they’re a refinement of a sound that to me’s as necessary to the continuation of life as the song of those ancient monks who can’t stop chanting or the world’ll end. Probably only the spirit-freeing “Talking Straight” transcends Hope Downs’ confines to stand on its own as an enduring anthem, but within its environs, there’s a long ribbon of pleasure that can easily become a figure-eight if you let it.

308/365

[pentanguine]

Worst Books of 2023

5. In Search of a Prince by Toni Shiloh

Whose fault is it: School book club

One thing I will say about this book is that it exceeded my expectations. The writing was decent! The author did actually research West African culture and history! Unfortunately, the book simply cannot escape the fact that a) it’s a plot point for plot point retelling of the Princess Diaries; and b) it’s a Christian romance. The villain is a sexually promiscuous woman born out of wedlock (whose motivations also make no sense), and every romantic scene leaves so much room for Jesus it forgets to leave room for romance. At one point the villain says: “Love is for children and pets. Just like Santa.” Spoilers, the last line of the book is “they would say I loved God, loved my country, and loved my husband,” and when I read that I think I retched.

4. Seducing the Sorcerer by Lee Welch

Whose fault is it: School book club and EBF

Honestly, the first part of this book was good. The characters were well-drawn and sympathetic, they had good chemistry and clear reasons to be interested in each other, and who wouldn’t love the worple horse. And then, somewhere in the second half, it all went to shit. The romance was underwhelming when they actually got together, and the sex was thin on the page and way less intense than what the book (and the baffling Goodreads reviews) had been implying. The political situation quickly went off the rails, before being wrapped up in an ending so neat and tidy Marie Kondo could have written it. Everything that can’t be logically resolved gets conveniently handwaved, and compelling character development goes out the window so the author can abruptly focus on high stakes international conflict. The villain is ultimately defeated by the vague threat of an army of enchanted fabric. In a lifetime first, I’m going to say this book needed less politics and more romance.

3. Devil's Night Dawning by Damien Black

Whose fault is it: Mine :(

I should never have picked it up knowing it was by a straight white man. “Great worldbuilding, truly epic,” said the reviews. “Dark, creepy horror vibes,” said the reviews. “It’s so original,” said the reviews. The great worldbuilding is periodic info-dumping on unimportant historical details by someone who thinks they’re writing LOTR and is actually writing a textbook. The dark, creepy horror vibes would be there if only the author could focus on his alleged main character, a demon hunting monk, for longer than one chapter out of ten. The originality is a religion in which Jesus The Redeemer dies on the cross wheel for our sins, and characters wander around saying “the power of the redeemer compels you.” Throw in a few misogynistic knights who casually murder each other while fetishizing chivalry, one (1) female character who of course has a very nice figure, and a lot of irrelevant POV characters who simply weren’t interesting, and I gave up at page 291.

2. House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski

Whose fault is it: Mine and everyone who’s ever raved about it

I finished this book out of sheer bloody spite, and I wish I hadn’t. Tedious, overly full of itself, impenetrable, opaque, misogynistic, and enmeshed in ideas of machismo and the nuclear family that made it impossible for me to connect with. The truly frustrating thing is that there were many genuinely good moments of skin-tingling horror, but they’re so buried under all the bloated academic hogwash that they failed to make an impact. This book is the guy in your philosophy class who thinks he’s smart but has just never been told to shut up. This book is a male author who thinks he can write women well because he gives them compelling thoughts on sex, motherhood, romance, sex, stripping, modeling, their own bodies, and sex. I would rather live on Ash Tree Lane than read this book again.

All Four Twilight books by Stephanie Meyer

Whose fault is it: EBF

These books are genuinely, appallingly, hilariously, pathetically, bad. As an adult, I try to be charitable to things that I disliked (or in this case, refused to interact with at all) when I was younger, because teenage girls get a lot of shit and the things that they like tend to automatically be labeled cringe, but…these books are actually shit. Not just mediocre, or a little juvenile, or with some notable flaws, but BAD. And they’re not even shockingly sexy! I thought Twilight was the series that parents wanted to protect their innocent children from, in which maidens were ravished by whole covens of vampires, bodices torn, innocence lost, werewolves howling in pleasure, etc. Stephanie Meyer is way too fucking Mormon for that. I’ve never read a less sexy vampire in my life, and yet these were the teen heartthrobs of my youth?? The first book was honestly fun to hate-read, but by the time I got to the fourth one I was just depressed. It opens with Bella feeling genuine dread at her upcoming marriage to “the love of her life” that she’s been manipulated into at the age of 18 against her will, and the idea of this being the thing anyone is obsessing over just makes me sad. It’s just Mormonism with bad writing and worse characterization. Allow me to present my reviews for each:

Twilight: “Such a fucking dumb book.”

New Moon: “A whole lot of nothing happens to the world’s most depressed teenager”

Eclipse: “No plot, just endless rehashes of the same vampires vs. werewolves argument with pedophilia for flavor.”

Breaking Dawn: “The bar was in hell, and she still managed to let me down.”

[spaceorphan18]

And Here's What You Really Missed: Jennifer Aspen & Acafellas

Going forward - this is going to be kind of how I tackle these recaps. I wasn't able to listen to the Jennifer Aspen episode before Acafellas came out, so sometimes a few episodes might be merged together.

On bigger episodes - like interviews with Chris or Darren or something, I'll make sure to do more of a transcript. Hope this works for everyone!

***

-Discussed motherhood, Kevin never wants children cause he can barely take care of himself. 

-Auditioned for Terri - Ryan wrote the part of Kendra for her.  Was really appreciative of being cast, and knew the show was going to be fantastic. She was also really sad when her time was up on the show, but knew the show was turning towards the younger characters.  

-Wasn’t really aware of Twitter until Chris Colfer told her she needed to be on it.  Kevin says he’s the one who got everyone involved in Twitter

-Lots of love for the characters of Terri and Kendra (Jennifer wants to assure everyone she’s not that dumb even if she continues to play dumb characters on TV.) Also mention a spin off for Terri and Kendra.  

-Lots of conversation around favorite lines and scenes in the show that involve Kendra (I’m sure you probably know most of these - but the Dr. Wu scene is probably the most infamous.) 

-Jennifer got on Glee Wiki to do a little research before coming on the show - and was amazed at the info there. (Me too, dude, me too - I use it all the time.) 

-Discussion around Jennifer and Kristen Chenoweth’s production company - they all gush about how wonderful Kristen Chenoweth is. 

-Jennifer brings up working with Steve Carell (in relation to a discussion about how not to laugh while working) and Kevin brings up working on The Office - and how he was scowling through his cameo because he needed to not laugh.  Kristen Chenoweth taught them to think about dead puppies.  

-Her one regret about Glee is that she never got to sing.  

-Kevin comments at one point that most people, when they remember Glee, remember season 1.  - to which I find interesting.  I’m sure to the cast and crew that was /the/ time to remember.  And I wonder if a general audience feels that way, too?  But I think Glee’s biggest spike was Season 2.  Old School fandom probably remembers Season 2 over everything else. 

-Have mixed feelings Acafellas [not a huge fan of Will’s story line -- same, my dudes, same] but, they like the b-plots, such as Kurt coming out [also same]. 

-When this aired - they were down in Australia for the press tour - Kevin went to a strip club for the first time (Jenna was there - but they don’t specify what kind of strip club).  It was the first time they really felt like they were getting famous.  Admit to being kids living it up and partying and having to figure out how to cure hangovers so to pass breathalyzer tests the next day before events.  

-They’re changing up their podcast format of recapping and going to talk about things storyline by storyline [Yes good - I think going through scene by scene wasn’t working for you guys - so I’m ready for this.]

-Briefly mention Victor Garber and Debra Monk as Will’s parents - mostly to say that this the first time they saw big names on the call sheet - so it felt like a big deal. 

-Kevin says Will’s plot line may have been inspired by Matthew Morrison’s time singing in a band - and also to give the adults more musical screen time.  

-Also, fun gossipy fact for you - apparently John Loyd Young, who played Henri, was dating Lea Michele at the time.  But that was not the reason he was cast.  

-They bring up something I’ve been saying for years -- that it may have not been appropriate for teachers and students to be singing I Wanna Sex You Up at a PTA meeting.  

-They talk about how big Josh Groban was at the time - and how amazing it was to have him there.  Kevin didn’t get to meet him - and is jealous that Jenna did.  

-Kevin says this episode is ‘uncomfortably straight’ and they agree that’s why they don’t like it so much. [Oh my god -- yes, everything about this yes.] They joke that in every musical there’s that one ‘dad song’ - and the acafellas storyline is the show’s ‘dad song’.  

-They change to the kids’ story lines - and discuss how they get to see more of Santana (Naya) in the episode.  They really love early Quinn/Santana dynamic. 

-They talk a little about filming with Whit Hertford who played Dakota Stanley - and how hilarious he was to work with.  

-Fun fact - the vocal adrenaline girl who is helping the other girl getting sick during the scene where they warn New Directions to stay away is Harry Shum Jr’s future wife [did not know that - how cool]. 

-Cheyenne Jackson was supposed to be Dakota Stanley but he was severely sick and couldn’t do it -- later Ryan wrote him in for season 2. 

-Kevin and Jenna state that the Mercedes/Kurt storyline is the best plot in the episode [I agree so hard.]

-Bust Your Windows was written in because Amber (and Kevin) were discussing the song and petitioned for Ryan to do it on the show.  A lot of their dancer friends were in this number - and it’s their favorite moment on the show. 

-They talk about Kurt coming out to Mercedes, how great the scene was - especially that he had support, and how big a deal it was at the time.  

-They mention that it’s three episodes in a row that Will is shirtless.  

-The Dakota Stanley scene was the hardest to shoot because they kept breaking.  They think the ‘I’m taller than you’ comment by Rachel was probably an improv. And it’s the first mention of ‘Frankenteen’. 

-Jenna’s favorite scene is the Sue/Cheerios scene at the end -- her favorite quote is when Sue tells the girls to smell their armpits.  [Ew, not my favorite but you do you, Jenna]. 

-Kevin’s favorite performance was from Debra Monk playing drunk.  

-They jokingly start talking about Kevin’s boobies - and then side tangent into possibly doing a side episode about their time on RuPaul’s Drag Race

-They boy didn’t dislike the episode as much as they remembered - and have a lot of fondness for Howard Bamboo. 

-Cringiest Moment - all the dancing; the straight dancing (lol), and the general embarrassment that is Acafellas - though they understand that that was kind of the point.  Best Song - Bust Your Windows.  Best Quote - Sue’s smell your armpits one (again, ew).  Best Performance by a Prop: the vomit into the trash can and the rock into the windshield.  Shit that didn’t age well: Sandy Ryerson in general.  Also Dakota Stanley’s insults.  Things that do hold up: Kurt coming out and Mercedes’s response.  

-Shit we found on Tiktok: A tiktoker noticed that in Ryan Murphy productions - he tends to name people a certain way in the credits -- like in Glee there was Super Gay Warbler 1, Super Gay Warbler 2, etc.  On other shows he has things like that come up, too.  It’s done intentionally - there’s also a lot of in jokes and silly stuff in the script for the amusement of the cast/crew.  

-[That’s pretty much it - they kind of lowkey note that Kevin’s not in the episode very much, but don’t go into why - I can’t remember if they said that why on their Showmance podcast.]

-They’re both super excited about Preggers next week.  

[Same.  This episode was super short.  I like the new format - but I wonder if once they get past Season 1 if they’ll dig a little deeper into the episodes since it’ll be newer material they haven’t talked about a hundred times.  The interviews with guests continue to be great.]

[bowtiesnmusicals]

Here is my recap of the Up and Down Under (Acafella's) episode of the podcast.

This is not exactly their favorite episode. It is not quite on the same level as the Pilot or Showmance.

After rewatching the episode Jenna's feelings changed. She still doesn't enjoy the acafella parts of the episode. She did enjoy the parts leading to Kurt coming out and the Sue and the cheerios parts.

The dislike of the episode might also be because it is centered around the adults.

When the episode aired the cast was in Australia doing press events.

It was the first time Kevin went to a strip club. They landed in Melbourne and went straight to a strip club.

The reception in Melbourne and Sydney was very warm. Thousands of kids showed up for the events in those cities. It was jarring and shocking to the cast. They didn't understand why so many fans had showed up.

It was the first time they were treated like celebrities/famous people.

They did the bridge climb in Sydney.

They were hungover during the bridge climb and freaked out a little bit about having to a breathalyzer test before being able to do the climb.

This trip was monumental for them.

The #1 song at the time was I've Got A Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas. They would do lots of events with them and even ride on the same plane at times.

It was the week of the Emmy's when this episode aired.

They are going to try a new recap style. They are going to talk about each storyline separately and then go from there.

This is the beginning of the big guest stars.

Do I need to recap the recap of the episodes?

The actor who played Henri (John Lloyd Young) was dating Lea at the time.

How did they get away with performing I Wanna Sex You Up?

Kevin was the only one not in the PTA performance scene.

Jenna remembers meeting Josh Groban and being starstruck.

The scene with Josh Groban and Sandy Ryerson is hilarious.

This was the first time Emma mentions John Stamos.

Every Broadway show has a dad song. The acafella's part of the episode is the dad song.

We get some scheming from Sue and the Cheerios. We get some nuggets of comedic brilliance form Naya.

Jenna loves early Quinn and Santana. They were like minions of Sue.

Tina got a line during the Vocal Adrenaline scenes and only had to do it once.

Harry's wife was in this episode. She was a part of Vocal Adrenaline.

Cheyenne Jackson was supposed to play Dakota Stanley. He travelled to LA and did his fitting. He got the flu. Lou in the costume department took care of him. He thought his Glee moment was over but Ryan created something else for him.

The c plot is the best plot of this episode. Mercedes has a crush on Kurt.

The gayvention was really fun to shoot. Jenna had fun getting to say Kurt is lady fabulous.

Jenna was invested in Bust Your Windows.

Amber and Kevin had been talking about Jasmine Sullivan. Amber talked about it with Ryan. This was the first time something they really loved got added to the show.

Bust Your Windows is the highlight of the episode for Jenna.

Kurt coming out to Mercedes was a huge deal. It was not something that was shown at network on tv at the time.

Shirtless Shue was at 7 mins 53 seconds. We are 3 for 3 so far. He has been shirtless in every episode.

Kevin's second favorite scene to shoot was the scene where Dakota was berating them. The cast were not professional at all. They couldn't help but laugh. The actor playing Dakota was a professional was even adlibbing some stuff.

Kevin and Jenna think that the line Rachel says when she storms out about being taller then Dakota was adlibbed.

This was the first instance of Frankenteen.

Frankenteen was Cory's original twitter handle.

Jenna's favorite scene of this episode is Sue's office.

The quote of the episode is, "I am going to ask you to smell your armpits. That is the smell of failure and it's stinking up my office."

Santana running out crying because she gets her tanning privileges revoked was the best.

Deborah Monk (Shue's mom) did a brilliant job playing drunk.

Everyone loves Howard Bamboo.

Tartie Takes:

Cringe Moment: The dancing and straightness of the boyband

Worst Dance Move: The Acafella's

They were suckers for Cory's sly trying to be sexy face. It was so good, adorable, and funny.

Favorite Song: Bust Your Windows

Best Line: I am going to ask you to smell your armpits. That is the smell of failure and it's stinking up my office.

Best Performance by a Prop: The vomit in to trashcan and the rock Mercedes throws into Kurt's windshield.

Shit That Didn't Age Well: The Sandy Ryerson thing about being allowed in the faculty room because he isn't allowed within 50 feet of children. Would that be allowed today? Also the insults from Dakota Stanley.

The Thing That Aged Well: Kurt coming out to Mercedes. Also what Mercedes said to him immediately after he came out. It is the perfect setup for what happens next episode between Burt and Kurt.

Honorable Mention Best Quote: Josh Groban loves a blowsy alcholic.

Shit We Found On Tiktok:

Ryan Murphy does backhanded credits. In American Horror Story there were credits for pale person #1 and pale person #2.

In glee there are credits for super gay warbler and other really gay warbler.

In the scripts in the stage directions Ian would write jokes and descriptions of people that would never be seen on camera.

Next week there will be a super great guest.

[txxxciii]

Welcome to pride month Mortal Kombat headcanons part 2!! I'll leave the link to the first part in the end of this post.

If you thought I'd go in a chronological order, like how I started with MK9 and should do MKX, but no. I'm just doing it in a completely random order. When will I stop? Who knows. :)

Amyways

MORTAL KOMBAT (2021) LGBT HEADCANONS

(Note: any characters I don't include I most likely consider cis straight. Another heads-up, I didn't feel like screenshoting the characters, so I'll instead use fanmade icons, but since I don't want to accidentally be disrespectful, I won't add in any flags. Also, for certain reasons, Cole and his family are entirely absent)

[ICON BY instewv (deactivated)]

BI-HAN (HE/HIM) — HOMOSEXUAL

Man is legit so thirsty he fucking killed his crush's family /j

In all honesty, as much as I love bireena and think they're destined to be together (but every time something's wrong), I cannot comprehend the thought of 2021!Bi-han unironically liking women. Something about that fight with Hanzo just felt intimate, y'know... (if you ignore the awful camera work). Alas, he's the type of a gay person you wouldn't respect, and shouldn't, in fact.

[ICON BY instewv (deactivated)]

SONYA BLADE (SHE/HER) — AROMANTIC ASEXUAL

2021!Sonya is sooo me fr fr. Like, the attitude? The humor? The fact that she lives somewhere in a dirt hole? The nerdy fixation?? Slay though, queen.

With everything said and checked, it's only natural that I will project my own identity into her. I feel like during her more youthful days she'd try to find some kind of a crush or a partner so she can relate to her peers, but each time it felt like a waste of space and energy. It's only when got into Special Forces that she completely gave up.

She respects people who share her mindset, or those who simply don't have the charm. She cannot stand, however, if someone insists on "fixing her" with a saying "I'm not like the other guys you've been with!". Those types of guys wake up in a dumpsite with their faces covered in bruises.

[ICON BY instewv (deactivated)]

KUNG LAO (HE/HIM) — HOMOSEXUAL

Every iteration of Kung Lao is gay in my headcanons. The way it's presented is different.

Kung Lao, as a monk, cannot commit himself to marrying someone, therefore, falling in love is also off the list. The difficulties in maintaining a cold-hearted demeanor began when he was assigned as a temporary supervisor to Liu Kang and his heart began to melt (side note: THEY'RE NOT COUSINS! IT'S A MISTRANSLATION! THE WORD LIU USES ROUGHLY MEANS "A STUDENT SENIOR"! READ JOHN TOBIAS' TWEETS WHERE HE DISPROVES THIS MISCONCEPTION! ALSO LIU LITERALLY SAID HE'S AN ORPHAN HOW THE FUCK WOULD HE HAVE A COUSIN? THINK, MK FANDOM, THINK! sorry I'm just so sick of seeing this same statement over and over again. back to hc ^^☆). Lao knew he felt something for Liu, but was it simple friendly love, or more? He couldn't tell, as he didn't have anyone close prior to Liu Kang. Sometimes, his anxiousness becomes so intense he isolates himself, but not for long until Liu brings him down to ground.

[ICON BY instewv (deactivated)]

LIU KANG (HE/THEY) — DEMISEXUAL, DEMIBOY

I'd imagine it's hard to get to know Liu Kang on a meaningful level, not because he's avoidant, but because 99% of the time you wouldn't know what the fuck is bro thinking about (only Kung Lao could decipher the code, and he doesn't share). Liu, in general, is pretty apathetic towards people, but once he likes you, he'll let you know. Whether it's regular private talks, sharing what's his or, hell, even saying "I like you" straightforwardly.

Don't ask why he's a demiboy though. It fits the vibes ok!!

(Insert meme: "Demiboy is a spectrum", on one end - 2021!Liu Kang, on the other - 2011!Baraka)

[ICON BY evaporated-milf]

KANO (HE/HIM) — PANSEXUAL

"For you, I don't have any standards" should speak for itself.

He's that one guy who'd fantasize about being in a str/p club with all those present in the room with him right now. But then he doesn't actually do anything romantic or sexual, he just bashes someone's head against the wall.

(Bro really meant it when he suggested Liu and Lao s/ck him off in that dinner scene /j/j/j)

[ICON BY evaporated-milf]

MILEENA (SHE/HER) — BISEXUAL

Mileena is bi and it's canon, though I feel like 2021!Mileena would be masc-leaning. Doesn't mean she can't feel attracted to ladies (like girl you know you didn't need to lay on top of Sonya like that right?), but with how she's basically surrounded by men, it's obvious she'll notice her attraction with them easier.

[ICON BY evaporated-milf]

KABAL (HE/HIM) — HOMOROMANTIC ASEXUAL

Listen, at first I headcanoned 2021!Kabal as aroace since it just made sense in my eyes. But then I watched the Behind the scenes video where they said that Kabal carries Stryker's badge, "his fallen partner", and I'm like "Okay man, weird way of coming out but congrats". That's when I thought I should just make him homoace as a way of satisfying both the demon and the angel on my shoulders.

———

I didn't bother to include Raiden (genderfluid aroace) and Shang Tsung (genderfluid) since the reasoning would be the same.

This was way more fun to write as MK2021 is my niche interest that I unironically love despite knowing it's absolute trash ^^)

Anyways byeee and happy pride month!

Part 1 (Mortal Kombat 9)