#stop shaming people who ship tamlain

[bluiela]

Is feysand out of elain week because what Rhysand did utm was sexual abuse and feyre burning the LOA was also abuse,

Rhys drugging and making feyre do stuff triggers people so it would be safe to ban Rhys to create a safe environment for fans

Elain tells everyone that she is no child to be faught over

Yet when Azriel goes against her wishes and tells Rhys he would fight elain in a blood duel it triggers because yet again a man going against the wishes of a women

Banning Azriel would also create a safe space for those who gets triggered by this (me included)

[theshadowsingersraven]

Hi! Had to unblock you real quick since I had you blocked due to Elaingate. Let me address some concerns for you and refresh your memory, since I'm not sure how you're confused about this.

Why were Eluciens upset about the prior Elain Week? Well, firstly, it wasn't exclusively Eluciens upset. It was many people with different alignments about Elain interpretations, different ships, etc. People were upset that any ships were banned at all, because a concept not everyone seems to grasp, particularly people like you is that character apprecation does not look the same way for everyone. This is kind of a base rule for all of fandom, not just ACOTAR. People were further upset because Elain Week's rule about banning abusive ships or features of other characters was based on "protecting survivors". And doing that meant, even unintentionally, creating a dynamic where only survivors who felt like they related to were/triggered by Tamlin's behavior deserved those protections. Not people who felt triggered by Rhys, Nesta, Feyre, etc.

There is a page for this Elain Week. It had to be taken over by new hosts because the prior hosts dealt with so much harassment and hate that they no longer felt comfortable hosting after 2023. If you check Elain Week's Archive, you can see the blog started in 2022 and has had posts since then. This is not a new blog. In fact, I personally reached out to the prior hosts, and here's my post doing so. Which, fun fact, is also tagged Elriel. Which means that any single one of you who felt like you should be included/represented were more than welcome to collaborate with me. That didn't happen. One Elriel (something like Pluto, iirc?) commended me for actually taking action and taking the vast recommendations Elriels made--which was to make our own Elain Week. And that happened.

Elain Day was spontaneous. That's the point. Some people who were friends with one another or mutuals discussed it with each other to make something, but it clearly wasn't widely announced to anyone since you can see that there are Eluciens who didn't know, Gwynriels that didn't know, Tamlains, etc.

You are, in fact, in a fandom of adults. The reality is that you isolated parts of this community who were shamed and treated like they were less than or didn't care about survivors of DV because their version of appreciating Elain didn't align with yours. Many of them DV survivors themselves-- including me!

Hi, I'm Raven, I'm a DV survivor, particularly at the hands of my dad. And yet, I'm capable of not treating people who have any appreication of Beron or might find a dynamic between him and any other characters interesting, particularly romantically, like shit or like there's some kind of moral failing. And these are my posts from months ago expressing that I, like anyone else, am responsible for my own triggers, as a DV survivor. I learned how to filter content that's tagged accordingly so I'm not exposed to things that trigger me, and there's even posts about how to do so yourself. x, x

Speaking as someone whose been in therapy for many years--art is therapy. Art is a way for people to cope, to experience things safely, to take their power back, etc. And it's gross to shame people for how they choose to explore topics, appreciate characters, or engage with a fandom generally, but especially when you don't know them or what their art means to them.

Respectfully, you have reaped what you sowed. I don't know how you can take a look at the elaingate tag and how many Elriels reacted, and not expect people to want to create a space for themselves to celebrate a character without further harassment and shame. No one is barred from participating in Elain Day, unlike the prior Elain Week.

You want to contribute something? No one is stopping you.

But you have no place to be upset that people stood on business about creating a different space when they didn't feel welcome in the other. And since Elriels were the ones pushing for the idea that not everyone is welcome in every space (which I personally disagree with) or that not everything is catered to you...shouldn't you be relieved to know that no is actually barred from this second one? That this isn't even the actual official event, just a random one-off day, and no one is prevented from participating?

Hope this sheds some light on the subject.

Leaving Elriels out of Elain Day, Real Classy Y’all

The Eluciens complain about how they felt like they couldn���t participate in Elain week, even though they were welcomed and given every opportunity to commission art. And chose to mostly not participate because they were upset about who the f knows what.

So then they host their own day for Elain and don’t advertise it anywhere and don’t even have a page for it, presumably to keep us out. How demure. How charming. How mindful. 🙄

All the sudden there’s commissions for an Elain Archeron Day, and not one Elriel I know had anything commissioned because we didn’t know about it.

I thought I was engaging in a fandom of adults, not overgrown mean girls who thrive on catty behavior and peaked in high school.