#still playing around w header images pls bear w me

[libra-kirishima]

Could I request some angst-to-comfort with Mirio? I've had a rough past few weeks. Feel free to make it as soul crushing as you want. Also, absolutely love your blog!

Your rough couple of weeks probably long since past by the time I'm getting around to this, but I hope you're doing better babe! Had more fun with this than I'd like to admit. Gender of the reader wasn't specific in the ask so I just went with fem reader. Hope that's ok!

Also includes the very slightest hint of manga spoilers but not to the point where it makes a difference.

You knew you shouldn't be alone.

All you wanted was to be alone, but as you heard the sound of footsteps gaining on you as you walked alone at night you knew you shouldn't be alone. You tried to walk faster, just hoping to make it that last stretch until you were safely back on campus, but you could tell it was no use.

"You shouldn't be walking alone at night like this." The person following you spoke, quickly catching up to walk by your side. You let out the breath you were holding when you saw that the person following you was just your boyfr-

Your ex-boyfriend. It was Mirio all along.

"It's not safe for you to be out this late. I don't want anything to happen to you, you know." He added, approach closer until your bicep touched his. His tone was surprisingly warm, with no hint of condescension. It took you off guard. You could tell that he really cared about you, and that realization hurt more than it should have.

"Get lost." You responded. "I don't want to hear anything you have to say to me.

"I'm not letting you walk all the way back to campus by yourself."

"Oh, now you care what I do?" You rolled your eyes at him stepping away so the two of you were no longer touching. Despite your anguish, you still longed for his contact again after you pulled away. "How did you know I was here anyways? Or where I was going for that matter."

"I saw you sneaking out by yourself, so I followed you."

"So you're stalking me?"

"No! Well, in this case yeah, but-"

"Why?"

"I told you that I didn't want anything to happen to you." You were clearly feeling argumentative, but he spoke back to you with a casualness that honestly made you jealous. You rolled your so hard that he was surprised they didn't fall out of their sockets.

"No, not that. Why do you always feel this weird need keep tabs on me in general? Following me around, pairing up with me for group projects, trying to sit next to me at lunch or in the common rooms, calling me and texting me constantly even when I said I never wanted to hear from you again."

"I just wanted the chance to talk to you." He admitted. "I want to tell you everything but you haven't even spare me a second glance."

"I don't want to hear anything you have to say." You repeated, turning away in hopes of ignoring the holes his stare were burning into your skin. You noticed that he drifted closer to you, so you were once again shoulder-to-shoulder. Despite retaining your anger, you allowed his touch to linger this time.

"Why?" He asked you sincerely. It was the first time he spoke to you in a way suggesting anything other than his typical optimistic nonchalance. You chose not to answer him, instead allowing the few steps to the front gate to be silent. You reached out to pull it open, but found it locked.

"Fuck me-" You groaned. Mirio moved to try the gate himself, though it still wouldn't budge.

"(Y/N)," He spoke again. "Please just talk to me. If you still hate me afterwards I understand. I know I hurt you. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself knowing that I hurt you irreversibly." For the first time since you noticed he was following you, you allowed yourself to really look at him. You felt the love he still had for you in his eyes. It was a gaze you missed, knowing that it was all for you. It made your heart ache with every second you stared at it. He wasn't yours anymore and it hurt to remember. You knew you shouldn't cave this easily, but you would allow yourself the indulgence for tonight.

"I'm going to try to find another way on campus. You have until I do to say whatever you need to. No exceptions. And if nothing changes when you're done you have to agree to leave me alone. Deal?" He nodded eagerly, chasing after you like a lost puppy as you began walking along the campus border.

"I- um- uh, this is a lot harder than I thought it would be." He scratched the back of his neck nervously. You shot back a sarcastic 'Is it?' to which he nodded. "I didn't think I'd get this far." He admitted. You shot him a bewildered look, watching the way he fiddled with his hands. Things you'd seen Amajiki do countless times but it was a strange look on Mirio. He was confident, bold, self assured even at his weakest points. It dawned on you that you must really mean something to him to be allowed to see this side of him. In the near three years you'd dated him, you'd only experienced him like this a handful of times. "I'm sorry." He finally spoke after a while.

"That's what you followed me out here to say?"

"I can't tell you enough times how sorry I am."

"You've told me that you're sorry countless times but do you know what you're sorry for? Do you care? Or are you just telling me what you think I want to hear?" You asked, too weak to continue making eye contact with him. You busied yourself feeling along the bars of the fence, no longer looking for anything in particular. The silence that passes makes you assume that you were right.

Part of you knew that that was the case all along.

So why did it hurt so much?

Would you seriously rather hear empty repetitive apologies? Did you really want to continue to be told what you wanted to hear without depth or meaning? No. It had nothing to do with anything he said. What you really wanted more than anything was your boyfriend back. But you wouldn't let yourself be used again. You didn't want to feel the sort of pain he put you through again. Your tears threatened to overflow right as he spoke.

"I'm sorry that I hurt you. I know I hurt you in so many ways and I can't take back any of them. That kills me to know, and I can't tell you how bad I feel about it. I'm sorry I pushed you away for so long. I was so afraid to tell you what I was feeling in the moments leading up to when we broke up. How much I hated myself for letting Eri go. How afraid I was that I couldn't save her. How hard it hit me after losing Sir Nighteye. I wanted to shield you from all of it. I was so afraid of losing everything that I pushed the most important person in my life away. I thought that keeping it all to myself would make things better for you, but they only made both of us feel worse." His way of speaking was a lot more composed than you would expect of him. He'd been thinking about all of this for so long. You stopped trying to keep yourself from crying. "When we broke up, in a way I did lose everything." He admitted sadly. "I'm sorry I didn't let you see me when I was in the hospital after I lost my quirk." He continued after a while. "I figured that you would think it was better than it actually was if I kept everything from you. I wanted so badly to keep you from being involved that I ruined the connection we had to each other. On that regard, I'm sorry I never told you that I got my quirk back. I figured you didn't want anything to do with me at that point since you wouldn't listen to me telling you I'm sorry. I didn't think that maybe you wanted to start with a normal conversation. I know you still care about me."

"I do." You said between sniffles.

"I know you do. And I took that for granted for so long. I'm sorry. I can't take that back but I can promise that I'll be better. I'm so glad that you still do. That's why I never stopped trying. If not now then I'd try to tell you I'm sorry until you stopped loving me."

"I can't." You confessed. It wasn't until now that you realized you were sat on the concrete crying. He had sat himself next to you, not fully hugging you but still rubbing soothing circles into your back.

"I'm sorry I threw away almost three years of our relationship so easily. And I'm sorry I spent so long blaming you for it. I should never have blamed you for refusing to put up with the pain I was causing you anymore. I'm sorry I didn't tell you all this sooner."

Mirio kept himself at a distance from you. A choice you appreciated and respected, but at that moment all you wanted was to be held. You leaned over and wrapped your arms around him, sobbing freely into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry too."

"For what?"

"I'm sorry I cut you off. I'm sorry I was so mean to you. I'm sorry if it seemed like I was trying to turn your friends against you with the way I talked about you. I'm sorry I never listened to you. I'm sorry you had to go through these lengths just to talk to me. I love you so much and I didn't want to be hurt anymore. I didn't know what else to do but I shouldn't have done that. I missed you so much that the only way I could think of moving on was to convince myself that I hated you."

"I miss you too." He whispered, placing a kiss on the crown of your head. "I miss being the one that has to wake you up in the morning. I miss being the first person to see your beautiful smile every day. I miss letting you pick the movie and then falling asleep on my chest halfway through. I miss you coming to dinner at my dad's house. I miss you sneaking into my dorm when you get lonely. I can never stay mad at you for long when I see you, even though you wake me up at 2 in the morning." You scrunched your nose up, but laughed softly at his words. "I miss that too. The way your nose would scrunch up like that. I miss hearing you laugh and making you smile. Knowing that I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy."

"Can we start over?" You asked wearily. He nodded, wiping his own tears away before flashing you the smile you loved so much.

"Yeah, I'd like that." He whispered.

You smiled into the crook of his neck before pulling away, leaning in to kiss your boyfriend once more.