#still looking for a normal decent salary though. need a writer? editor? designer? hmu

[dykemcqueen]

musings on a personal vice: i often feel attracted to the shine of meaningless ultracapitalism because it is a scam. it is fake it til you make it, on the biggest scale possible. it is, to be honest, very easy if you know the proper language and you have just a few connections and you smile and you're charming and you lie through your teeth.

and it's attractive bc you can make six figures clackin away at a keyboard sitting in stupid meetings doing jack shit. it would be completely unbearable if you werent making absolute bank. but you are. so sometimes im like wow i could very easily do that! all i have to do is sell a teeny tiny piece of my soul :) i think i am at heart a scammer and i was born to do mad men stuff ❤️ but its quite literally evil and stupid. youre not contributing anything of worth to this world. in fact youre actively perpetuating an inherently abusive socioeconomic system. it is so much better for the earth and your friends and your soul to do real work including but not limited to: creating art, helping people, cooking, starting a garden, providing a tangible service, making little trinkets, laughing with your besties, enjoying your time.

sometimes people tell me well isabelle it's not like this will change anything. you do you ! get yours !!! but i dont know. maybe ill sleep better. maybe at least i can cultivate a community that cares for each other. also i just dont need that much. most people dont. to stay clothed fed housed entertained creative and happy no one would need that much except that rich people keep taking all the money and making things cost too much because ! and ive said it before ! theyre scammers !!! they lie !!!! they cheat !!!!! they refuse to pay a proper wage !!!!!! they manuever situations to benefit themselves and themselves only. i dont wanna be that guy. i dont even wanna be the guy writing emails for them. and sometimes i wish i made 200k/yr at a consulting firm 🥰 sometimes i wish i could apply for a job and stick to it until im the well-paid management in charge of "delegation" 😋 sometimes i wish i could just do investments and "make my money work for me" 😍 but i know for a fact consultants dont do anything and also steal jobs. i know employees can be in charge of themselves and the current hierarchy of owners & management doesnt need to exist. i know making your money work for you is code for making someone else work for you and then taking their money. so even if consulting or some other tiktok girlboss career is perfect for me i will continue to resist all temptation.